TDL1: Total Drama Letterz
by cragmiteblaster
Summary: Dedicated to Frank15. Chris is back for another season and so are twenty six brand new alphabetical OC's. Will Barney find pirate treasure? Will Spider ever get well? Will Lavender prove cheerleaders aren't dumb? Will Kasimar ever lose? Read to find out!
1. Day 1 part 1, place your bets

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total drama Island or any of its characters and subsequent seasons; they are owned by Teletoon and also cartoon network. Every single contestant in this story is mine, similarities with any other authors characters is coincidential and not intended so if anyone is angry then sorry.

**The Warning:** Total Dram Islan's winner is mentioned so don't read if you don't want to be spoiled. This story contains bullying, some love, bad launguage, over the top feminism, nose picking and that sort of thing. Nothing M rated though.

**Pairings:** You'll have to wait and see but if you pay close attention some of them may be slightly hinted in the early chapters.

**Note- **I do not own the Alphabet idea; that belongs to Frank15. This story is dedicated to him so hopefully hell give it a read ... or not. Anyway; all credit goes to Frank15 for inspiration to start the story. And if you want to know what the characters actually look like then just go to my profile and follow the links to their pages. I've even got a promo! But be warned ... I write better than I draw

Now let's get this party started!

* * *

Chris Maclean, sadistic host and pretty boy was standing on the dock of shame. He seemed happy … a little too happy. As the intern cameraman set up the camera his finger trailed up to his right nostril and he began a full on nasal expedition.

"Yeah; that's the spot." Said Chris as he continued picking.

"We're filming Mr. Maclean." Said the intern in mild disgust.

"Wh – AH!" Said Chris as he quickly removed his finger and regained his posture. He flashed his well known grin for the camera and waved. "Hello viewers at home and prison; I'm Chris Maclean, THE hottest host in the universe, and I'm once again coming to you live from Wawanakwa Island, somewhere in Muskoka."

He walked the edge of the dock and looked at the briny blue sea before continuing.

"You all remember last season where Owen; the big guy, managed to win the season and become one hundred thousand dollars richer. Well not only have you been spoiled, haha, but also this season is a bit different ... this time the grand prize is going to be one … MILLION dollars!"

Chris grinned and clapped as he continued speaking for he loved the sound of his own voice.

"But don't get too excited just yet; you may remember the twenty two teens you knew and loved from last season … but this season we have twenty six new contestants! One for each letter of the alphabet! Because this season is called … Total Drama Letterz! We noticed that a select few channels refused to give us a time slot … apparently we weren't 'educational' enough; beatniks. Well maybe if we teach people about letters or something trivial then we can get on those channels and I can get a bigger pay check … and it'll be easier to remember who's who."

He rubbed his hands together at the thought of money.

"I bet you are going to want to ask a few questions like 'who are the new campers', 'what are their stereotypes' and 'will you just get on with it'? Well; all those questions will be answered very shortly because this season is going to start now! Sit your butt on the chair, grab a drink and fixate your eyes on the screen because this is Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

"And we're back from the song that bought us many fans and even more green paper." Laughed Chris. "The contestants are just about here but first I am required to read out this little disclaimer. Ahem 'Warning; the following challenges you see in this show are dangerous and should not be attempted at home, so please don't … No really; don't'. Well; now that the disclaimer is done it's time to meet our brand new contestants; starting with Oscar!"

A boat pulled up and a very muscular and strong teen got off. He had black eyes and neat brown hair. He wore a black exercise shirt. It was likely he had a six pack but it was hard to tell through the black fabric. He also wore red and blue checkered shorts and white trainers with red heels.

"So this is Wawanakwa Island huh?" Said Oscar. "I'm going to live up to my name and be a winner! It will take hard work, perseverance and sweat, but mostly sweat."

"Oscar! Our resident muscle man! Say; have you been working out?" Asked Chris.

"All day everyday." Replied Oscar. "I want to represent Canada at the Olympics."

"In what event?" Questioned Chris.

"The sport of kings; weight lifting." Said Oscar as he flexed.

"Well hopefully strength is going to be better than hair because here's Nakia!" Said Chris as he pointed to the boar that arrived.

Out of this boat came a medium sized blue eyed girl wearing a red denim shirt and a black skirt. She had yellowy brown shoes and her hair was brunette and very good looking and silky.

"Greetings Chris; my hair and I are accounted for and will be the winners of this contest."

"Err … I may only be a C student but I'm pretty sure hair isn't considered a person." Said Oscar with a little confusion.

"Eeeeeek!" Shrieked Nakia. "What's that on your head?"

"My hair … duh." Said Oscar with a raised eyebrow.

"THAT is _hair_? Maybe I could lend you some shampoo and hair gel?" Offered Nakia.

"I like it just how it is; I'm more concerned about my muscles than my hair." Replied Oscar as he took a dumbbell out of his bag and began lifting it up and down.

"Can't you just taste the ratings?" Asked Chris with a grin.

"Now you." Said Nakia nicely. "You unlike him, you have very nice hair."

"Thanks; I can see we'll get along just fine." Said Chris with a very rare smile. "Maybe you'll get along just as well with the next contestant, Xaria."

Xaria stepped off the next yacht and looked around. She wore a white shirt with a single orange square as well as pink cotton trousers and orange shoes. Her hair was black as well but with three yellow streaks which gave the impression of a bee.

"Not a good start to the competition; a filthy squalid boat." Grumbled Xaria. "You could have at least put some music on it."

"I thought the yacht was pretty good." Said Oscar as he continued weight lifting.

"Yuck! A muscle gorilla." Sighed Xaria. "Too many people in the world have muscles nowadays; so much for brains over brawn."

"I thought girls liked muscles." Said Oscar. "And my name is Oscar; nice to meet you."

"The feeling is not mutual." Said Xaria. "And who might you be?"

"I'm Nakia; you're hair is pretty good; the streaks really bring out the inner bumble bee."

"It's supposed to mean danger!" Cried Xaria in annoyance. "But stereotyping my hair aside; I'm Xaria with an X and not a Z, I'm semi pleased to make your acquaintance."

"Thanks … I think." Said Nakia uncertainly. "So; what do you think of the contest?"

"It's ok; but it isn't good enough; Chef Hatchet is going to cook garbage and Chris's wake up calls will be unbearable. But aside from absolutely everything it's not bad."

"Put on your nice faces people because the next contestant is Vinnie!" Said Chris as a guy got off the boat.

This guy was somewhat short with reddish hair, brown shoes and a Russian fur hat with an orange V. His shirt was blue sleeved while the rest was blue. His joggers were light brown. His shoes had blue soles and orange soles The most noticeable thing about him was that in place of his right arm was a robotic arm ending in pincers.

"Hi everyone." Said Vinnie with a wave. "How's it going?"

"Oooo; I can't judge your hair because of your hat." Whined Nakia.

"Well my hair isn't so bad; no need for a rating." Shrugged Vinnie.

"What happened to your arm?" Asked Xaria.

"Typical; one of the first things people ask me is how I lost my arm." Sighed Vinnie. "I don't know you well enough to get into it."

"Also typical; not telling me something because you think I'm not trustworthy." Complained Xaria.

"It's not that at all." Said Vinnie but it fell on deaf ears.

"Just my luck to be surrounded by jerks." Sighed Xaria.

"You sure do complain a lot don't you?" Said Oscar.

"I do not!" Gasped Xaria. "I'm just brave enough to say what I think."

"Introducing Spider!" Interrupted Chris as another guy got off the newly docked yacht.

Spider had brownish red hair with two points at the edge and a lot of single loose longer hairs here and there. His shirt was orange and had a grey capital S on it while his trousers were blue with yellow spots; below that was a pair of green shoes. It was quite clear he didn't look too good. His green eyes were dazed, his mouth was woozy and he had a hint of green on his cheeks. He was clearly sick

"Hi everyone." Said Spider with a gag. "I'm Spider; I'm here for the *cough* fresh air and the interesting people."

He walked towards the others and Nakia instantly backed off.

"Oh my god! Your hair! It's terrible!"

"I can't help it; all *splutter* the illnesses I've ever contracted make it go like that." Explained Spider.

"Are you sure you should be here?" Asked Oscar. "If you're sick then maybe you should be in bed."

"My doctor said fresh Island air would be good for me; maybe I'll get a little better." Said Spider as he sneezed.

"Are you ill often?" Asked Vinnie.

"All the time; for the last two years I've had some sort of unknown bug and nobody knows the cure. It's not fatal but it's kinda uncomfortable." Gagged spider as he sniffled.

"Yet another insane person." Sighed Xaria. "Why couldn't there have been another person who has sanity?"

"Here comes the next contestant; Quana." Said Chris as a girl got out of the yacht.

Quana was tan and held a microphone in one hand. Her hair was neat and black with two blond streaks. Her shirt was pink with a yellow music note and her trousers were dark green. On her feet were white tennis shoes with a small amount of black.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Waved Quana. "Time to start this party! With a song here and a high note there I'm sure everyone will get along."

"Not likely." Grumbled Xaria.

"You don't seem very happy." Noted Quana. "I think a good song will cheer you up."

Quana turned on her microphone and tapped a beat with her right foot.

"_Cheer up, cheer up, it's alright; the happiness on the horizon is in sight_." Sang Quana very impressively.

"Oh my gosh; that sucked!" Whined Xaria as she covered her ears.

"Well I thought *gag* it was really good." Said Spider with a smile before it turned into another gag.

"Thank you for your compliment." Said Quana with a smile.

"No, ooooooh, problem." Said Spider politely.

"Here's someone who may or may not be interesting." Said Chris as he gestured towards the approaching yacht. "It's raven."

The next boat arrived and out came another girl; though she came out slowly; she must have been shy. Once she was in sight she turned out to be a black girl with trousers and a shirt that were both purple though the shirt had three yellow Z's on it. Her hair was brownish black and was in a pony tail. Her shoes were pink

"H-h-hi everyone; I'm R-r-raven and I hope w-we can be f-friends."

"What's up? I'm Vinnie." Said Vinnie with a wave.

"H-h-hi there Vinnie; y-you have an i-i-interesting arm."

"Interesting? Hmm; it hasn't been called that before." Smiled Vinnie. "Nervous are you? Don't worry; all of us are a little nervous; it's our first time being on TV."

"Not me; I was in miss America hair edition a year ago." Said Nakia proudly.

"N-nice hair." Said Raven. "Do you c-comb it o-often?"

"Everyday for an hour at a time." Replied Nakia.

"But it IS just hair." Pointed out Oscar.

"Shut it." Hissed Nakia.

"You won't be able to shut the next contestant anywhere because her name is Yessica."

A blond girl with two large pig tails stepped off the yacht and looked around. She wore a blue shirt with pictures of waves on it. Her trousers were blue and her shoes were black. She looked quite friendly.

"Hi everyone; my name is Yessica! Y to the ess to the I to the ca!" Said Yessica with a giggle. "Anybody want to be friends?"

"I will be!" Smiled Quana. "You can be my back up singer; I've always wanted to do a duet."

"Then a duet it shall be!" Squeed Yessica.

"Great; another person who squees." Moaned Xaria in bitterness. "Wasn't it bad enough with the wonder twins last season?"

"I liked them." Said Yessica firmly.

"You and who else?" Replied Xaria smugly.

"I liked them; they remind me of my little sister." Said Oscar as he dropped to do press ups.

"Why did I sign up for this terrible show?" Whined Xaria.

"How should I know?" Said Nakia. "You've only complained since you've got here and never said anything positive."

"Whatever." Said Xaria with a roll of her eyes.

"The next person to arrive on Wawanakwa is Barney!" Said Chris as the next yacht pulled up and a guy jumped out.

This guy looked wild; or his hair was anyway. Barney wore a black shirt with a smiling skull on it and blue trousers with a gold chain. His shoes were goldish brown and looked good. In one hand he held what appeared to be a dagger but it was just a realistic fake. On his head was a black pirate hat with the smiling skull and cross bones. Under it was a mess of blond hair in a long pony tail with an orange streak and to the side of his head were two blond dreadlocks.

"Arrrrr! Hi everyone; Barney's the name and pirating is my game!" Cheered the pirate teen as he raised his dagger for effect. "One by one you'll walk the plank and only the captain will be left; me!"

"What a weirdo." Said Xaria in disbelief.

"I think he's cool." Said Spider. "He is everything I am not; healthy and cool."

"So who might you be me heartie?" Asked Barney while pointing his dagger at Raven.

"I-i-i-i-i-i-im R-r-r-raven. Could y-y-you p-p-p-point the dagger e-e-e-elsewhere?"

"Oh; sorry." Said Barney as he sheathed the dagger. "Pleased to meet you Raven. I'm Barney and I HATE dinosaurs of the purple variety."

"You should have been in last season." Said Vinnie as he observed Barney. "You would have kicked major butt."

"That I would have … but I didn't know about the show until after the fourth episode." Explained Barney. "But Izzy would have been a worthy match for this sea dog."

"Izzy was a good competitor." Said Oscar while still doing press ups. "Though personally I think Eva would have been better as she is so strong."

"You had all better behave yourselves because here comes teachers pet Daisy!" Said Chris as the newest yacht let off a neatly dressed girl.

Daisy, as she was called, looked at the others and haughtily raised her nose. Her black hair was neat and tidy and her face had freckles. She seemed to be wearing her school uniform; a black tie, pink and black skirt, pink blazer and yellow shirt. Her high heals were pink and expensive and looked fashionable.

"Greetings everyone." Said Daisy. "You must be the other contestants. Well even though there are no teachers around to keep an eye on you it is still in your interests to behave. Daddy is a head teacher and has the numbers of all head teachers in Canada; they are but a phone call away."

"Are you threatening to snitch on us?" Asked Quana in disbelief. "It's the summer! Whatever we do is not the teachers business."

"Say whatever you please; you're not the straight A star student who has been class president four years in a row." Yawned Daisy dryly.

"I think I'm gonna be sick." Groaned Spider as he hurried to the other edge of the dock to be sick.

"What a repulsive boy; he should be sent to the sick bay permanently." Retched Daisy in disgust.

"He can't help it." Said Quana firmly. "He's got some unknown flu bug

"… Wow; you have nice hair, almost as good as mine." Said Nakia in awe.

"I know; isn't it lovely?" Said Daisy proudly. "Of course; not that you F students would know anything about lovely."

"You don't seem too nice me hearty." Said Barney. "Out at sea you would be the first to walk the plank."

"This coming from a pirate wannabe?" Sneered Daisy.

"You like education; I like pirates; everyone is different Arrrrr?"

"As great as it would be to see a huge fight break out; it will be even better to meet the next contestant, Eleanor!"

The yacht dropped off another girl; this one looked slightly unusual. Hey blond hair was long and untamed; the ends of it were dyed green. She had glowing green eyes and on her head was what at first glance looked like a real turtle when on closer inspection it was a hat. Her shirt was dark green, her shoes were brown and her trousers were a nice shade of brown as well. In one of her hands she held a large cage of two small ferrets that were in one word … cute. She looked younger than the other contestants; about twelve years old.

"Howdy and hello lads and ladies." Waved Eleanor with her free hand. "Wawanakwa looks sunny and nice today; perfect conditions to find some interesting wildlife."

"On this Island the only wildlife is giant monsters and carnivorous plants." Said Vinnie.

"All the better." Smiled Eleanor. "And the sunshine will be good for my ferrets to relax."

"Eww!" Shrieked Daisy. "I hate rats!"

"They are _ferrets_; not _rats_." Said Eleanor calmly. "They are very lovely creatures and frost and dandelion need the relaxation as they will be parents soon."

"Oh great; adding to the overpopulation." Sighed Xaria again.

Eleanor chose to ignore this and placed the cage on the dock. She took out a harmonica and began playing a soothing melody.

"That's not bad." Said Quana with interest. "How long have you been playing the harmonica?"

"Over two years; it's a fun hobby." Replied Eleanor.

"The next guy will possibly have hobbies; it's Hector!" Said Chris dramatically as the boat dropped off another guy.

Hector was fairly overweight but looked nice; he wore a sleeveless green jumper with some words stitched in. The words said 'Saint Wattlesworth Math Club. His arms had brown sleeves which suggested he was wearing a brown shirt. His shorts were also brown and he had a double chin. His hair was brown and spiky.

"Oh great; another disgusting fat slob with a love of fart jokes." Said Daisy in disgust.

"I assure you I am nothing like last season's winner Miss; would a so called 'disgusting fat slob with a love of fart jokes' have mastered algebra, be vice captain of the mathletes and be able to add numbers together, transmute them and work out their low bearing tandems?"

"Well … you're still fat." Retorted Daisy.

"Sometimes an excess of weight can be more of a help than a hindrance." Said Hector politely. "I stay warm in the cold and can't be blown over; plus I hardly feel punches."

"This guy is good." Said Yessica. "He seems to be able to handle bullying problems very well."

"That I can." Said Hector as he walked away from Daisy. "I've protected my fellow 'nerds' from many a beating on several trio's of occasions. I pride myself on my intellect and the fact that just because I'm a nerd doesn't mean I can't be a cool nerd."

"He's ok." Said Nakia. "But his hair is a bit on the 'naff' side."

"Did you know all the hair on your head is dead besides the root; you've actually got a mass of unliving thread coming from your skull; everyone does."

"Enough of the intelligence because it's time to say hello to Gary." Said Chris.

The yacht dropped of a medium built guy. He had a confident expression and tidy brown hair. On his head was a chef hat and a unibrow. His shoes were gold, his shirt was yellow with a chicken drumstick picture and his trousers were red and spotless. In one hand he held a spatula. He was clearly a chef of some kind; probably a fair margin better than Chef Hatchet.

"Bonjour my fellow contestants and possible teammates; my name is Gary Boltok and I hope to not only win this contest but also showcase my cooking skills." Said Gary confidently and strongly.

"I hope you don't get voted off too soon." Said Xaria. "After seeing last season it is clear we need a chef who actually knows how to cook."

"That … will be no problem." Said Gary with a nod. "I shall cater to my team's nourishment needs to the best of my top graded ability."

"W-w-why did you b-b-ring a s-s-spatula?" Asked Raven.

"Because I personally don't trust Chef Hatchet's equipment to be clean; and this spatula was the first piece of cookery equipment I ever used. I've got all my other things in my luggage."

"I don't think anyone would trust Chef Hatchet's cooking utensils." Said Eleanor. "He probably cooks with dirty hands."

"I dread the time I find the answer." Said Gary with a shudder.

"Maybe you will find it later because on a completely unrelated note here comes Jimmy." Announced Chris as another yacht arrived and dropped off a young lad.

Jimmy was clearly a cut below the rest in terms of age; he looked to be ten years old. He wore a lime green t-shirt and shorts striped orange and green. His shoes were rainbow checkered and quite smart. On his head he wore a large teal and orange spotted beanie with orange elastic. His hair was very blonde and went down to his shoulders while some poked out from under the front of his hat.

"Hi there boys and girls." Said Jimmy. "Isn't this exciting? The first day of a new season of total drama … and we're on it! I am proud to represent the letter J in this contest."

"What in the world are you doing here?" Asked Daisy in shock. "You're not even in high school!"

"Well; my audition tape was good so here I am. Don't worry though; I'm capable of taking care of myself and I have people around me to stop a potential attack."

"I still don't think you should be here." Said Daisy stiffly.

"Leave the little guy alone." Said Barney as he raised his fake dagger.

"I agree; his independence and presumably stamina far exceeds the average number for his age range."

"Yeah!" Agreed Eleanor.

"Thanks everyone." Said Jimmy with a smile. "By the way Miss; I like your ferrets."

"It's Eleanor and thank you." Said Eleanor gratefully. "At least someone recognizes they aren't rats."

"In my opinion the only way someone could mistake a ferret for a rat is if they are either a deadpan snarker, eat too much sweet corn or obsess over Pokémon." Said Jimmy without realizing how angry Daisy was getting at him.

"PETA will be happy with the next contestant; a little too happy. It's Mable!"

The yacht dropped off a tall black girl finishing off an apple. She put the core in her pocket and stepped off the dock. She had an orange shirt with green sleeves. Her shorts were a basic shade of red. On her feet were black tennis shoes and in-between her shoes and shorts on each leg were red leg warmers. Her hair was died blue and light orange and went in a large ponytail.

"Thank you for the introduction Chris; I am in fact part of the PETA organization. I'm going to prove that PETA trained teens can go far."

Xaria coughed and the noise she made sounded like 'baloney'. Mable walked over to her and seized her up.

"Do you have a problem?" Asked Mable.

"Not really; it's just that I personally hate PETA. It's just an organization made up of pissed of vegans who want to stop us getting our daily intake of protein and thus making humanity become weak and bony thin."

"PETA is not about that at all; it promotes better animal rights and conditions! But I can see there is no reasoning with you so good day."

And with that Mable turned away from Xaria and stood by the others.

"Don't worry about her." Said Oscar. "I was the first here and ever since she arrived she's been complaining and whining about everything."

"She's a lost cause alright." Agreed Mable.

"Look out every person with male genetics because Fifi is making her entrance."

A just above medium height girl stepped off the boat and strode past Chris. She seemed to really like pink; her shirt was bright pink with a yellow female symbol and the word female. She wore a red mini skirt and pink shorts beneath it. Her shoes were red. Her hair was dyed pink with two black streaks of normal hair.

"Wawanakwa Island; the home of total drama and an undeserving winner." Said Fifi dully. "Maybe this year a girl will win; no, a girl WILL win."

"You look like a candy cane." Mumbled Xaria.

"Well you look like a bumble bee." Replied Fifi much to Xaria's frustration.

"What's up; my name's Oscar." Said Oscar as he extended a hand.

"Get away from me you man! Like your muscles? I bet you think that females are weak and flimsy right?"

"What? No!" Said Oscar in confusion.

"Well good; I guess that's a VERY slight improvement. But there will be no anti female sexism; if so I'll call in my feminist friends." Said Fifi threateningly.

"A feminist?" Asked Gary out loud. "What was Chris thinking?"

"Sexism!" Shrieked Fifi. "You sexist boy!"

"I'm NOT sexist!" Said Gary. "I just know feminism and reality TV mixed together is bad news."

"Humph!" Snapped Fifi. "I've got my eye on you."

"Hold your horse's folks; the party is just getting started; please put on smiles for Irene!"

A brown girl got of the yacht and waved a flag. The flag had a red handle and had a picture of a tree on it. She wore a silky orange shirt with a tree picture and blue knee trousers with orange fish on them. Hey eyes were brown and on her feet she wore purple sandals. Her hair was light brown and was in a long pony tail with an orange hair boblenear the end and a blue one near the top. In her hair was a pink flower.

"Nature!" Yelled Irene loudly.

"And what exactly was the point in that?" Asked Daisy rudely.

"I wanted the first word I ever said on TV to be about what I love. And now that it is said and done let me say hello! As Chris told you I am Irene and I love trees and the woods!"

"She's got wood for brains this one." Laughed Fifi snarkly.

"At least my hair doesn't look like an afro gone horribly wrong." Said Irene casually.

"You … you … MAN!" Spat Fifi.

"Err … what?" Asked Irene in confusion.

"Oh never mind mud for brains." Sighed Fifi meanly.

"Is anybody here actually nice?" Asked Irene in disbelief.

"I am." Said Jimmy with a smile.

"Aren't you a little … well … small to be here?" Asked Irene.

"Nope!" Grinned Jimmy. "The competition is open to anybody under twenty so it is O-kuzay!"

"Kuzay the cool because here comes Kasimar." Said Chris.

THUD. That was the sound made when the next guy slammed down off the boat. He had a red shirt with a red and yellow triangle pattern on the sleeves. His trousers had a flame pattern of red and orange. On his feet was a pair of metal boots. His black hair was short but he had a large blue Mohawk and a large goatee. His face had a seemingly permanent snarl.

"Hi Kasimar; just so you know the producers like your personality and want you to stir up some drama and trouble; can you handle that?" Asked Chris eagerly.

"It'll be my pleasure." Smiled Casimir evilly.

He walked down the dock with heavy footsteps and stopped next to Jimmy. He towered over the ten year old and snarled.

"Looks like I've found my punch bag for the summer; all the nerds back home went to a camp in Alaska to escape me; but there's no way off this Island except by boat … and you have no key!" Grinned the mean bully.

Casimir flicked Jimmy in the face and stood with his arms crossed.

"What is your problem you creep!" Cried Eleanor in anger. "Jimmy did nothing to you!"

"Oh shut up girl; I'm big, you're small and you can't do a thing about it. Maybe your rats could make for a good sandwich!" Laughed Casimir brutally.

Eleanor gasped and held her ferret cage tightly. Casmir just looked on smugly.

"For better or worse; here comes Lavender!" Said Chris as another yacht pulled up.

Out of this one came a short girl with long orangey red hair. She wore a red #1 cheerleader shirt and a blue skirt. Her tights were also red while her shoes were black with orange soles. Her eyes were red and she had a crafty look about her.

"Chris Maclean; the guy with the fancy hair." Said Lavender craftily. "I don't suppose if I was to give you some hair gel you would give me immunity in return?"

"As tempting as hair gel is I'm afraid not." Said Chris regretfully because he loved hair gel.

"Ah well; it was worth a try." Shrugged Lavender as she strutted down the dock. "I wonder if I could incorporate Wawanakwa into a cheer."

"Oh great; another brainless cheerleader; just what the population needs." Grumbled Xaria.

"Stereotyping are we bumble bee?" Asked Lavender casually. "Well if you don't like it then buzz back to your hive miss queen bee."

"It means danger! Not bees!" Shouted Xaria in fury. "It's supposed to be cool; a sign of my own personality; veesh!"

"Veesh isn't in the dictionary." Said Daisy scornfully. "And being an A star grade English student I should know."

"I say it when I get angry; kinda like now." Replied Xaria with another sigh.

"Angriness is inevitable." Said Lavender dismissively. "It takes a true contestant to control their emotions and use them to their advantage."

"That is way #57 of how to win a reality show." Said Hector. "My favorite is number 25; the IQ victory."

"The next contestant may or may not have a high IQ; I don't care as long as I get paid but here's Patch!" Said Chris as a fat guy got off the yacht.

This guy was indeed large. His hair was red and his eyes were black. His shirt was sleeveless and brown with a picture of a hotdog which covered his large gut. His shorts were black while his shoes were brown. He seemed to have an air of simple mindedness around him.

"Food, food." Groaned Patch as though he were a zombie.

"Oh cool! A zombie arrr!" Grinned Barney.

"I haven't eaten in two minutes; I'm starving!" Whimpered Patch.

"How can someone like you be starving?" Asked Yessica in disbelief.

"Food." Said Patch again.

"There are people in Africa starving and you need food?" Asked Mable in surprise.

"Yes." Replied Patch simply.

"This guy's … unique." Said Barney hesitantly.

"Maybe the next guy will be as well; it's Andy!" Said Chris happily.

A fourteen year old Asian boy jumped off the yacht and look around eagerly; he had short yet neat black hair and a purple shirt with green wrists and a picture of a rocket. His shorts were black and had some yellow stars on them. His socks were green and his shoes were purple. His blue eyes seemed to light up the atmosphere.

"Hello fellow people of earth; I'd like to be known as an astronaut but just call me Andy." Said Andy. "And who knows; maybe in a distant galaxy a whole alliance of aliens is watching us!"

"A-a-a-a-aliens?" Squeaked Raven. "Oh no."

"Don't worry; as long as humanity makes a good first contact then all will be fine." Said Andy reassuringly.

"Are you a space fan?" Asked Yessica.

"Not just a space fan; more of a space fanatic, I've loved it since I was a preschooler. The finals of this contest shall be my final frontier." Said Andy.

"So poetic." Smiled Yessica. "As fish are to the ocean you are to the cosmos."

"I wonder what alien animals would be like in a stew." Pondered Gary while twirling his spatula in one hand.

"Maybe they'll taste as good as a knuckle sandwich nerd!" Growled Kasimar maliciously.

"Nerd? Rather be a nerd than a bully." Said Gary coolly.

"But being a bully is awesome!" Laughed Kasimar while flexing his muscles. "You get extra lunch money, you are respected and you get really strong."

"And on the downside you get a record, everyone hates you and you become a monster." Shot Andy.

"Moving along from that it's time to introduce Uzuri." Said Chris as another boat pulled up and dropped off a girl.

This girl was somewhat short and young looking despite being sixteen. Her hair was blond and tidy and she looked fairly pretty. Her shirt was pink and had a red heart. Her trousers were purple and small whereas her shoes were as pink as her shirt. She was also holding what appeared to be an sort of emo doll.

"Hi Chris; is there an anthill nearby?" Asked Uzuri sweetly.

"No; why?" Asked Chris in confusion.

"I just want to burn some ants." Giggled Uzuri. "Like my doll?" She asked as she pulled its speaker string.

"_Let's all cut ourselves; heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll while scaring Chris very much.

"Err … is she sane?" Asked Spider in worry. "I don't *cough* like scary things too much *gag*; they make me feel sick."

"Don't worry; I'm not going to rip your head off with your spine still attached." Smiled Uzuri.

"Err … does that mean you will or you won't?" Said Spider with great worry as he took a few steps back.

"Oh no; spines are icky! What with the blood and the screaming and the spilt bone marrow! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

Most people took a big step back; this girl was definitely a little insane.

"Want to hug my doll?" Asked Uzuri to Fifi as she pulled the string.

"_Ow my arm_! _It hurts when I hacksaw it_! _Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll again.

"Get that thing away from me!" Screamed Fifi as she hid behind Hector.

"It's just a doll." Said Hector matter-of-factly. "A humanoid made from various materials and a few simple pull activated mechanisms to give the impression it is articulating. Though I do admit that the girl is a tad creepy."

"The next contestant isn't creepy; it's Tabitha."

The yacht dropped off a tall blond girl; well, most of her hair was blond but she had two indigo streaks. She had freckles and her eyes were blue. Her trousers were mostly blue though the top and bottom of them were green. Her shoes were bright pink and her shirt was purple with a picture of a crown. Her lips had blue lipstick on them.

"This is it? This is Wawanakwa? I would have thought it would at least smell of something different than raw sewage." Mused Tabitha mildly. "Well; I'll just have to make the best of it while I'm here."

Tabitha strode down the dock and looked at the other contestants. She smiled politely which was not what people would expect based on her appearance.

"Good day everyone; Tabitha Barrington at your service." Said Tabitha as she shook Patch's large hand.

"Me like food." Smiled Patch dumbly.

"You sure seem to; I'm sure you have some good abilities within that frame called your body."

"She seems nice." Said Uzuri to Vinnie. "What do you think?"

"Nice; possibly, a team player, we'll see." Said Vinnie. "Hopeful we'll be on the winning team and not the losing one."

"Talking of teams are we?" Asked Tabitha as she strode up. "Maybe I'll be on yours, you both seem very interesting."

"Do you like my little miss emo doll?" Asked Uzuri as she pulled the string.

"_Side to side gives you an ambulance ride; up and down gets rid of your frown; heheheheheh_." Laughed the emo doll again which freaked some people out. Tabitha just smiled.

"Well; it's certainly an interesting toy, how many sayings does it have?" Asked Tabitha curiously.

"Over nine thousand!" Grinned Uzuri.

"That joke is so old." Grumbled Xaria.

"I agree; nice bumble bee hair by the way." Said Tabitha.

"It isn't a #bleep# bumble bee! It's #bleep# danger!" Roared Xaria.

"Sorry; I'm terribly sorry." Said Tabitha quickly. "But still, nice hair."

As the sound of another yacht grew closer and everyone turned away Tabitha smiled evilly and bared her sharp teeth.

"_This … will be easy_." She thought to herself.

Out of the next yacht came a medium sized ginger harried boy with dark sunglasses. Going through the center of his hair was a dyed blue arrow. He had a ginger walrus moustache and had a wicked look on his face. He wore a grey buttoned shirt with a green tie and a jacket with black shoulders and wrists but white sleeves. His trousers were leather and black and his shoes were tidy and brown.

"Wallace." Greeted Chris. "I heard you've got your own theme music right?"

"That I do Chris." Grinned Wallace.

He took out a remote and pressed a button and evil organ music began coming from nowhere.

"Fear me you insignificant ants!" Boomed Wallace. "I am Wallace! The greatest villain who ever walked the face of the universe! He commits crimes; and then he will go. Where does he go? Nobody shall know. Fear the villain and his shadow. That darn elusive … W-ali-ice! MWHAHAHAHAHA !"

Wallace finished by throwing his hands up and laughing like a maniac from an asylum. Everyone looked at him in shock, humor and confusion.

"So wait; you're some kind of bad guy?" Asked Lavender.

"Not a bad guy; I'm THE bad guy!" Snapped Wallace. "One day I will conquer the wooooorld!"

"Dr. No; this guy is not." Whispered Eleanor to Jimmy who chuckled.

Wallace heard this and ran up to Eleanor as fast as blinking.

"Do you DARE to mock the great Wallace?" Asked Wallace angrily while waving his arms threateningly.

"I guess so." Said Eleanor as she raised an eyebrow.

"…Oh! Ferrets! They go great with carrots so I've heard." Grinned Wallace as he stared at Frost and Dandelion the ferrets.

"Carrots?" Asked Mable in confusion as she had been following the conversation in disbelief.

"Yes … carrots." Said Wallace dramatically. "The vegetable of EVIL! Mwuhahaha!"

"Isn't he a great ratings harvester?" Asked Chris. "The next person actually has a record! It's Zita!"

The newly pulled up yacht dropped off a girl. She had very untidy brown hair that was all over the place. She wore a thick black shirt with a green dollar sign on it. On her legs were orange joggers and below them were black climbing shoes. Her eyes were red and she held a sack in her hand with a cent sign sewn on.

"Chris Maclean; rich man right?" Asked Rita.

"That's me; the one everyone knows and loves!" Boasted the arrogant host.

"Good; that means they'll be some good stuff to steal!" Grinned Zita. "It'll be like my stealing spree at the prom. So much jewelry and money. And the prize money will be good for buying more equipment so I can steal even more!"

"Just don't steal my hair gel and all will be fine." Shrugged Chris.

"I guess that's ok." Lied Zita as she approached the mass of others. "But I can't say the same for everyone else!"

She looked at the others and discreetly stood beside Barney and silently reached for his hat.

"Touch my hat and I'll go cannon ball on you arrrrr!" Growled Barney.

"Next time; next time." Said Zita.

"A thief?" Grumbled Xaria again. "And I thought we had enough problems."

"At least I know how to make a living bumble bee!" Sneered Zita.

Xaria's eye twitched in fury and she breathed deeply and quickly.

"Introducing the twenty sixth and final contestant … Carlton!" Said Chris as a nervous trembling guy got off the boat.

This guy looked very easily scared. Unusual for a guy he was wearing a pink shirt with a green butterfly on it. His trousers were light blue and his socks were brown. His shoes were black and he looked like he had small feet. His eyes were hazel brown and his hair was striped mixture of toffee yellowy brown and hazel brown like his eyes. He was also fairly pale.

"Hi Carlton." Said Chris while slapping him on the back.

"AH! Don't do that." Whimpered Carlton. "I don't like surprises that I'm not expecting!"

"But then it wouldn't be a surprise." Said Chris flatly.

"Exactly." Said Carlton as he slowly approached the others and stood a distance from them.

Kasimar crept up and stood behind him.

"BOO!" Roared Kasimar at the top of his lungs.

Carlton screamed like a three and a half seconds old girl and turned around shaking like a leaf.

"H-h-h-h-h ubba b-b-ba-a-a-abba wah waaah." Stuttered Carlton is terror.

"What a wuss." Laughed Kasimar. "I bet you're even scared of bunnies!"

"That and more than a thousand other things." Whimpered Carlton shakily. "I just hope there isn't another phobia factor this year."

"Well maybe … ooga booga booooga!" Bellowed Kasimar.

Carlton nearly wet himself and shivered in fright. Kasimar laughed; so did Chris, Zita, Wallace and Daisy. Fifi chuckled and Tabitha managed to successfully fight back a laugh.

"Isn't this great; twenty six campers; and what's more … an entire alphabet! This is going to be a great season!" Said Chris as he looked at all twenty six campers. "But first; we're going to need a promo picture for the fans! Everyone head to the end of the dock and strike a pose."

"Do you think I'm an F student?" Asked Daisy haughtily. "Maybe a lot of the others are … but I saw last season; the dock can't hold all of us and I don't want to get wet!"

"But … but … FINE!" Said Chris angrily. "We'll just take the picture from the grass! HAPPY?"

"Very much so." Said Daisy stiffly and smugly.

The twenty six campers stampeded off the dock and crowded around on the grass next to the dock. Chris grumbled like Muttley the sniggering hound and took out his camera.

"Ok everyone; say letterz on C." Said Chris as he took the lense off the camera.

"Don't you mean three?" Asked Lavender.

"No; I mean C; since your names make up an alphabet we're using letters instead of counting." Explained Chris impatiently. "Ok; once again, on C ... ... ... A … B … C!"

"Letterz!" Bellowed everyone as Chris snapped the picture. He looked at the picture and sighed.

"Last years picture was better … but I'll make do; after all, with a bully, a thief and goodness knows what else I'm sure to get more hair gel spending money this year." Said Chris to himself. "Ok everyone; follow me to the bonfire pit and I will give you the run down of what is going to be happening. And for Pete's sake; someone bring me a latté, I'm thirsty!"

* * *

Not much later Chris and the twenty six soon to be traumatized contestants were standing or sitting around the feared place of elimination. There were now only three stumps but a few logs had been pulled up here and there. Chris looked around at the contestants and looked at their reactions to being on International TV.

Barney was grinning widely and was adjusting his hat.

Eleanor was whispering to her ferrets.

Fifi was glaring murderously at Gary who tried to avoid her gaze.

Kasimar was grinning viciously in Jimmy's direction and cracked his knuckles.

Jimmy didn't notice Kasimar and he looked very excited and held the rim of his beanie in excitement.

Oscar was flexing his muscles and sizing up the competition.

Zita was carefully stuffing some flowers into her loot sack.

Chris grinned and rubbed his unsweaty palms together; these weirdo's were going to make his show even better than before.

"Ok populars and unpopulars; listen up! Welcome to the second season of Total Drama Island; it is called Total Drama Letterz and you are the lucky twenty six out of thousands who have been chosen as the best of the best that auditioned. But enough about what you already know, time for a few new things."

Chris snapped his fingers and an intern ran up holding a large silver case.

"This is what you are here for; the most wonderful thing that there is and will be!"

"You mean Candy?" Asked Jimmy.

"Not even close." Said Chris "I mean money. You may remember last season the grand prize was one hundred thousand right? Well ... this time the prize has increased; it's not two hundred and fifty thousand, not half a million either … you guys are going to put your lives at stake for ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"

Everyone collectively gasped and cheered, all that money would make their lives very comfortable.

"Yes; a million big boys is quite a lot indeed." Said Chris. "But it won't be easy. You will be partaking in the most extreme and crazy challenges imaginable, eat disgusting food and of course … walk the dock of shame if you lose."

"That won't be me." Said Daisy. "This Island needs prefect students like me."

"Confident are we?" Asked Chris. "Good luck. Now you may have noticed that there are only three stumps left and a few logs. Turns out that tree stumps can rot. There weren't any trees in the vicinity to chop down so we consequently spent a little money and chopped and dropped a few particularly uncomfortable Redwoods."

"WHAT?" Asked Irene is shock. "You cut down a redwood for this?"

"Nope … we cut down three."

Irene was about to scream but Chris continued before she could start an angry lecture.

"What is more; last season we had the Screaming Gophers and Killer Bass … this year however they are a thing of the far distant past. This season will have three teams; all the good reality shows are doing to nowadays. So; three teams for more competition."

"But you can't divide twenty six by three." Pointed out Hector promptly. "Maybe if you'd paid attention in school instead of frequenting the bourney house you would know that."

The contestants laughed but Chris didn't look too bothered.

"Yes; I noticed that. That is because until further notice there will be no teams. You can make friends and allies if you want but you may not be on the same team as them." Warned Chris. "The interns have your luggage which you will get back tonight after the first bonfire ceremony."

"So somebody is leaving today?" Asked Andy. "Hopefully it won't be me; I'm gonna shoot for the stars!"

"You're right Andy. But until then you can all have a bite to eat in the mess hall; I'm sure Chef Hatchet is anxious to see you." Chuckled Chris. "He just _loves_ young people."

Some campers gulped at the thought of the psychotic Chef and his dreadful food.

"And finally; the confessional cam is up and rearing to go. If you've got something to say and want everyone to hear it then go on in and spill the beans."

* * *

**Confessional- Letters? What about numbers?**

**Quana: This is gonna be a super summer; and I can show the world my singing as well as make friends; this is going to be like the best musical ever!**

**Barney: Arrrrr! A pirate's life on Wawanakwa for me! I'll bring home the booty … and if anyone messes with me or any great friends I make then I'll have their booty! Yo ho!**

**Vinnie: I like it here; most of the people are quite nice. Kasimar is a jerk, Zita can't be trusted, Daisy is annoying but everyone else seems ok. I think my metal arm and I are going to have a great time.**

**Nakia: I hope this show isn't too rough; I mean (**Nakia makes a 'well' sort of face), **I want to win and be the fan favorite but if my hair gets dirty … I might faint.**

**Jimmy: Ten years old and on the big screen. Yeah! Me, Ricky, Charles, Ted and Pablo, my friends from back home, made a deal. If I win then we share the prize money. I drew the longest straw (claps) so here I am!**

**Fifi: One thing I can guarantee is that a women is winning this season; if a guy wins I'll scream!**

**Tabitha: I made a fool of myself on the dock; acting NICE? Not my style. I'm going to win one way or another … and unlike that complete bald idiot Heather I'll keep a low profile.**

**

* * *

**

The twenty six campers entered the mess hall; three tables were set up and the floor had dirt here and there. The smell of burnt rubber was in the air; just what was Chef Hatchet's latest evil culinary creation? As everyone lined up and took out a tray from the pile Chef Hatchet, the big man himself, appeared from within the kitchen with a large tray of green eggs and ham.

"Aaah. Fresh meat!" Grinned Chef. "I hope you all bought your stomachs because you're not leaving this room until you've eaten your meal! Now come and eat your DIN DINS!"

First in line was Carlton; he trembled in fear at Chef's piercing gaze; Chef seemed to be scanning him, seeing what made him tick.

"You! Scaredy cat! Eat this!"

Chef dumped green eggs and ham on Carlton's tray. Carlton made a noise that sounded like 'mimblewimble'.

"What was that?" Bellowed Chef.

"Nothing; it's j-j-j-just that I'm s-s-scared of green eggs and h-h-ham." Mumbled Carlton as he hurried away to the tables.

"What a wimp!" Laughed Kasimar. "Scared of food; this is the sort of food you eat at my school and you have to like it!"

Chef dumped a dose of questionable food on Kasimar's tray and Kasimar just shrugged as he left to eat it.

Mable looked at the food in disgust and looked at Chef Hatchet as though he were insane.

"Do you call this crud food?" She asked in shock. "I bet even raccoons wouldn't touch it and they eat _anything_."

"So what about the raccoons? And this is food, good food!" Bellowed Chef. "My mama raised me on this until I was thirty!"

"Is that why you have a frown all the time Chef?" Asked Jimmy innocently.

"WHAAAAT?" Roared Chef. "I loved that food very much! You little juvenile miscreant!"

"Ok; let's all take five and a half." Said Yessica. "He just asked a question … plus you're offended by a ten year old on live TV; not a good image."

Chef just muttered as he continued serving the contestant their food. Last in line was Gary. Gary pulled up a chair to the counter and began slowly eating.

"Why ain't you sitting with the other ungrateful brats?" Asked Chef Hatchet as he raised his cleaver threateningly.

"Because I am a Chef; I am the top catering student at my school and I, unlike you, know how to cook well."

"Are you saying I'm a bad cook?" Growled Chef Hatchet dangerously.

"I might be." Replied Gary as he forked some green ham and ate it. "I was wondering if I could perhaps do the cooking this season."

"You seem awfully brave for such a small boy!" Growled Chef.

"Ok; first, I'm medium, not small … at all; and second, I get brave when good cooking is involved. And let me tell you; I know good cooking."

"Are you getting at something?" Asked Chef Hatchet.

"Maybe; I might just have an offer for you."

"I'm listening." Said Chef as he put his cleaver away.

"Here's the deal; you let me cook GOOD food for my team and I will in return teach you how to cook. Maybe you'll find other employment where you'll be treated better hmm?"

"… I'll think about it; you'll have my answer tonight." Said Chef as he skulked away deep in thought.

* * *

**Confessional- Deal with the devil?**

**Gary: Straightforwardly I want to spread my knowledge of cooking and make the team I end up on want to keep me around. And besides; I'm sure Chef has talent, I shall be the mother bird to the chick should he accept.**

**Spider: **(Holding his stomach) **That food … I think I'll be feeling it a little later **(groans) **or maybe in a few seconds.**

**Raven: S-s-so this is t-the c-c-confessional? I t-think t-that judging by h-h-his f-f-food chef could u-use a m-mentor."**

**

* * *

**

About half an hour of gagging and forced eating later everyone had finished their food. It was without a doubt terrible. The contestants with stronger stomachs like Patch, Hector, Zita and Kasimar didn't feel too bad but some felt pretty sick.

"That … was without a doubt … the worst crap I've ever tasted." Groaned Daisy. "My school's canteen is much better than this; they know how to cater to the students hunger."

"It's official; things have got worse." Grumbled Xaria. "What now?"

As if to answer her question Chris burst through the door at that moment; he was grinning his well known sadistic grin and as all you Total Drama fans know; that means very bad news.

"Hello again campers; I hope you enjoyed your food." Said Chris. "That is what I would say if I gave a darn about you. Now that you have your food it is time for your first challenge and this one is AMAZING!"

"Is there any reason why you put emphasis on amazing?" Asked Hector. "I deduce it is to do with our first obstacle on the path for the million."

"You may be right Heckling Hector; and we shall find out; everyone follow me and I shall show you your first challenge this summer."

"I doubt this can be anything good." Said Oscar in concern. "Last season's first challenge was a cliff dive; I bet Chris is planning something like Russian roulette."

"As good as that would be to watch I don't think the lawsuits would be worth it." Said Chris as he left the mess hall with the contestants following him.

"The first day … the best day for EVIL!" Grinned Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- Cucumbers are evil too!**

**Wallace: **(Rubbing his hands together). **This will be a memorable summer; the summer that evil prevailed! I just need an apprentice; I'll keep my evil eye open, these things take time.**

**Andy: I wonder if it's a space themed challenge. I've always wanted to blast into the stratosphere in a rocket. I'm not gonna lose yet; Andy out.**

**Eleanor: Chef Hatchet gets angry too easy; I saw last season when he voted off Duncan due to his grudge and now he snaps at a ten year old! Granted I'm only twelve so there isn't much age difference between me and Jimmy but that wasn't right. Still **(She crosses her legs) **what challenge has Chris's insane mind cooked up?**

**

* * *

**

Twenty minutes of walking later Chris and the twenty six campers were standing in front of a giant metal cube with red lights around it here and there. Everyone looked at it; it was certainly big.

"Alright everyone; you may be wondering why there is a giant cube in front of you right?" Asked Chris as he took out a sheet listing the rules.

"The thought crossed my mind." Said Quana.

"Well; your first challenge is … The Labyrinth of despair!" Yelled Chris dramatically as lightning struck from the sky.

"Wait; how did lightning strike on a sunny cloudless day?" Asked Lavender in confusion.

"Internet." Said Chris simply. "Anyway; this cube is home to a devious labyrinth designed by devious minds in a devious place … pretty devious huh?"

"Repetition." Mumbled Xaria. "Just what we don't need."

"The rules are simple" Said Chris as he ignored Xaria. "You will all be given a special wristwatch that will switch on once you enter the labyrinth and will switch off when you exit. There is any number of ways through it but only one exit. You can team up with some others if you want but don't waste time."

"So basically all we are doing is going through a labyrinth?" Asked Vinnie. "What's the catch?"

"I'm glad you asked Vinnie." Said Chris. "There are many traps and obstacles within this cube; plus some of the areas are pretty dark. But there probably aren't any monsters though."

"The word probably is _very_ reassuring." Said Quana sarcastically.

"Yep; I'm just a good host." Chuckled Chris sadistically. "So to all you viewers at home; who will win this challenge? Who will get lost? Who is afraid of the dark … and who will be the first voted off and be utterly humiliated? Find out when we return on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

**And there is the first chapter; hope all you guys and girls out there enjoyed it, it was about twenty seven pages of microsoft word! **

**Hpefully I did a good job on this; what did you like? What didnt you like? And what do you think of my OC's? Leave a review and let me know. f there is one thing I like it is reading the reviews that tell me what a good job I did ... or not.**

**Next time: - The contestants enter the labyrinth and needless to say but I'll go ahead and say it anyway ... not all is well. Freindships are made as well as some conflicts. And the first bonfire ceremony has a special ... 'twist'.**

**Until next time, CragmiteBlaster out.**


	2. Day 1, Part 2, the Labyrinth Of Despair

****

Disclaimer:

I do not own total drama Island or any of its characters; they belong to teletoon and cartoon network (lucky buggers). I do however own all twenty six OC's that appear in this story. Also the alphabet concept doesn't belong to me; it was originally made by Frank15; so go read his stories; they're really good, honest!

**The Warning: **This story contains things such as over-the-top feminism, nose picking, a little love, bullying, friendships, drama and that sort of thing. You ahve been warned.

**Pairings: **Wait and see!

**Notes:** Quick update eh? I've been working on this all day, literally! Also Frank15 has drawn two of OC'as in his own style; Xaria and Lavender. They can be found on his deviantart page. Finnaly; as before the pictures of the characters as well as the promo are linked to on my profile; so check them out :)

**Poll: **Go to my profile and vote for your favurite character; I want to know who you love and who you hate. If you want to that is...

**Here we go!**

* * *

"And we're back from the adverts." Said Chris Maclean. "Sorry for the presumably unbearable wait!"

"We didn't go anywhere douche nozzle." Said Kasimar rudely. "You stopped talking for about five seconds and then started speaking again! And I thought that 2nd grader I gave a concussion was delusional."

"It's for when we edit and … never mind; you wouldn't understand." Sighed Chris before smiling again. "Now; there are some extra things I need to say before you enter the labyrinth. First of al; if you are in there for more than three hours then the interns will come and get you out; so don't worry about getting lost and wasting away. Also; hidden in the labyrinth are two treasure chests; you'll know them when you see them. Inside them is a special prize that you will find very useful indeed.

"How do we win?" Asked Lavender.

"Simple; the top five quickest times, or the first five out of the maze, will receive immunity for tonight's vote. A very good prize as nobody wants to be voted off first."

Chris took out an air horn and raised it.

"Ok everyone; you know the rules and what you're going to do, so let's get going! Three, two, one, GO!"

Chris sounded the horn and everyone ran around trying to pick people to work with; it would be easier with more people when you're in a labyrinth. But then again…

* * *

"Arrrrr! Come space man; together we shall rule the high seas of the maze." Said Barney to Andy.

"Why not; you seem pretty cool?" Said Andy. "And who knows; we might find the two chests as they may have something good."

"It could be a possibility." Grinned Barney.

"What do you think will be in the chest, err, Barney right?"

"That's my name me heartie!" Smiled Barney. "Yo ho! And maybe it could be some kind of sword or something that will help us greatly … or just a bag of candy maybe."

"Then let's get going; we don't want anyone following us." Said Andy as they ran to the maze.

"So long ya scurvy dogs!" Called Barney to the others.

* * *

**Confessional- High deck on the low deck!**

**Barney: I came here to make friends and win as well as sail the seas. I think I have a good feeling about this challenge. This'll be awesome! Yohohohohoho!**

**

* * *

**

"So we're in agreement that we're in a group together right?" Said Lavender to her two team mates Mable and Irene. Both of the other girls nodded.

"Sure thing Lavender" Said Irene eagerly. "We're gonna rock the jungle … or is it labyrinth? Ah who cares; as long as we can save some trees then I'm game."

"You seem pretty smart for a cheerleader." Said Mable. "I thought Cheerleaders were dumb."

"Don't remind me." Sighed Lavender as they turned to the Labyrinth entrance.

"Excuse me." Said a meek voice behind them

All three turned and saw Carlton standing there with shaking feet and a very nervous expression; he looked as though he would faint.

"Need something?" Asked Mable.

"I was wondering … if I could come too … if you're ok with it." Whimpered Carlton.

"Why sure!" Smiled Irene. "As long as you don't harm nature then why not?"

"I don't know." Said Mable. "He looks a bit flimsy this one … and his eyes are too close together."

"You think he's useless right?" Asked Irene.

"Kinda; especially after that performance on the dock." Said Mable to reinforce her point.

"In my opinion I say we bring him." Said Lavender thoughtfully. "We'll need all the help we can get and he'll be able to tell us if anyone is coming … welcome to the team Carlton."

Carlton nodded and suddenly squeaked in fear as a crow flew past.

* * *

**Confessional- What a wimp**

**Lavender- Carlton is definitely easily scared; I mean, scared of crows? That's lame. Maybe he just needs encouragement to conquer his fears? **

* * *

"So it's settled; me and you in a duo for victory?" Said Gary to his team mate Hector.

"Indeed; I think we stand a good chance, the traditional odd couple, big and small." Said Hector with a nod.

"I'm not that small; but that's ok. But as the saying goes 'trouble comes in threes'; maybe we should prove the saying wrong and get someone else." Pondered Gary.

"Why not her?" Said Hector as he gestured to Raven who was standing alone.

"Good idea." Said Gary.

He approached Raven and she turned and lowered her head nervously.

"Y-yes?" Said Raven shyly.

"Would you like to come with us into the labyrinth; it's pretty big and going alone would be a bad idea." Asked Gary.

"Err … o-o-ok" Stuttered Raven.

"Then off we go my friends." Said Hector.

They had not gone three steps when a shrill somewhat unlikable voice called to them.

"I'm coming too." Said Daisy as she strode up. "You'll need a student like me to keep you in line and work out problems you don't have the mental capacity to solve."

"I don't know." Said Hector. "Nothing good comes in fours; you know what comes in fours? Squares … and four is the number of death in Chinese culture."

"Well w-w-we could give h-her a c-c-chance." Said Raven quietly.

"A wise decision; I knew you would pick me; now let's go, losing is not an option.

They quickly entered the labyrinth while Gary sighed too himself.

* * *

**Confessional- Squares are bad? What about triangles?**

**Gary:** (Head in hand).** That girl will be trouble; just wait and see.**

**Daisy: I'm sure to win; I'm a star student and every teacher likes me; well, daddy is their boss so they have to but still, this challenge will be easy.**

* * *

"Would you like to come with me?" Asked Nakia to Quana. "You have nice hair and that's a good thing to have."

"Sure; I may not know you but you seem really solid." Smiled Quana.

"Can *gag* I come too?" Asked Spider. "Beyond my *splutter* sickness I'm quite smart."

"No thanks." Said Nakia. "You have nasty hair."

"I understand." Said Spider with a slow nod. "I'm used to rejection; people just don't want to get my sickness. It's a valid reason."

"Hold on, Spider is it? Well; I don't care about hair, I say that you can come as well." Said Quana kindly while giving Nakia a glare out the side of her eyes. "There is more to a person than just appearance. It's like when Serperoth revealed the evil behind his pretty face."

"Thanks Quana." Said Spider gratefully. "I won't let *cough* you down."

"I hope we don't regret this." Said Nakia as they followed the others teams into the labyrinth.

* * *

**Confessional- Judging people by hair? Oh boy…**

**Nakia: I just don't like bad hair; mum always says that people with bad hair are bad news, like the bullies at school. Seriously, bad news**

**Quana: I'm beginning to dislike Nakia a little; I take back my first impression, I'll see how she goes but judging someone by appearance isn't right.**

**Spider: I wish I was well; curse my white blood cell deficiency.**

* * *

"With my strength and your level headedness we'll be unbeatable!" Smiled Oscar as he and Eleanor walked towards the maze.

"Is it ok if I come as well Mr. Oscar?" Asked Jimmy politely.

"Sure thing little buddy." Said Oscar. "You could be useful for getting into small spaces we can't reach."

"Yay! I have a purpose in the group." Beamed Jimmy. "Now quick; let's get into that maze before anyone follows us."

"Good idea." Said Eleanor. "We must be as speedy as a cheetah!"

"Oh great; a gorilla, a nature fanatic and a kid, you guys are sure to win." Grumbled Xaria as she passed by.

"Don't you have better things to do than complain all the time?" Asked Oscar.

"It's who I am; I'd be a Goth but the outfits stink and I don't want to die my hair green or blue."

"Your hair is nice; kinda like a bumble bee." Said Jimmy with a smile.

Xaria nearly exploded but took deep breaths and stopped herself.

"Does that annoy you?" Asked Jimmy. "Sorry about that; no harm meant."

Xaria nodded and sighed.

"For the sake of having a group and a better chance at winning I guess I'll tag along." Said Xaria, "But I won't like it."

* * *

**Confessional- She probably won't**

**Xaria: What can I say? It's who I am, so many unfair things in the world so we may as well complain about them. Eh whatever. At least Jimmy apologized.**

**Oscar: I hope I get to use my muscles in this challenge; if that is the case I'll be in the next round for certain. (**Flexes muscles). **Rawr!**

* * *

Yessica had teamed up with Zita and Patch and was starting to have second thoughts on her team mates. Patch was staring into space while eating a chocolate bar and Zita was taking a chocolate bar from Patch's pocket without him noticing.

"Ok everyone; shall we get going?" Asked Yessica hesitantly.

"Ok girly." Said Patch dumbly. "Me like it when food go chomp swallow."

Zita and Yessica looked at Patch for a moment before turning to each other.

"I agree; let's pick up the speed; that way I'll get the good loot before anybody else." Said Zita while rubbing her hands together.

"I don't think stealing is allowed." Said Yessica.

"It's never stopped me before." Said Zita. "And I've got to make a living somehow; I'm silent but deadly I am."

"So are my botty burps!" Grinned Patch as he strained and farted.

"Run! Before the smell reaches us!" Cried Yessica as she ran towards the entrance to the Labyrinth.

"I'm right behind ya!" Said Zita as she sprinted away from the idiotic fat guy.

"Wait for me buds!" Bellowed Patch happily as he slowly jogged after them.

* * *

**Confessional- Oh what's that horrible smell?**

**Patch: Yeah; I'm pretty much here for the food. **(Burps)

**Yessica: Why do I have the feeling I've made a big mistake? Hopefully I'm wrong. Now on to the challenge!**

* * *

"Thanks for letting us be part of your group Tabitha." Said Vinnie. "Usually people think I'm bad luck because of my metal arm."

"Well I can't imagine why." Said Tabitha falsely sympathetically. "You seem like a very decent young lad. So Uzuri; ready to enter the labyrinth?"

"Sure! And maybe we can find some spiders to pull the legs off, Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri creepily.

"Yes, well, that being said … I propose we hurry up or we might be up for elimination." Said Tabitha smoothly. "Ready to enter?"

"I'm right behind you." Said Vinnie.

"What do you think you're doing?" Asked a voice nearby.

Fifi walked up and was pointing to Vinnie in disgust.

"Why do you have a guy in your group?"

"He's one of my friend's thank you very much." Lied Tabitha.

"Girls and guys do not mix; girls work better with their equals." Said Fifi.

"If that were true you wouldn't have been born." Replied Tabitha. "But if you think he can't be trusted then I invite you to our group to be proved wrong.

"Fine; but we'll lose with a guy slowing us down." Said Fifi.

Vinnie blinked and sighed; he disliked the pink haired girl VERY much already.

* * *

**Confessional- What was Chris thinking?**

**Fifi: Girls rule, guys drool. That's all I have to say.**

**Vinnie: I have a feeling I'm going to grow to REALLY dislike Fifi, what does she have against me?**

**Tabatha: If all goes well I'll win the challenge and have three allies. But Fifi should watch herself; despite being a villain I don't like sexism of any kind to either gender … but don't be thinking I'm nice, I'm a cold hearted predator!**

* * *

Kasimar was going to the labyrinth alone; that was how he worked best, by himself. Plus other people were all useless to him. He was just about to enter when Wallace approached him.

"Greetings Kasimar." Said Wallace smartly. "I see you are going alone; quite a good idea being that you are so strong."

"Beat it ginger." Growled Kasimar while flipping Wallace the bird.

"Confident I see; maybe that confidence could be used very well for some … evil things." Grinned Wallace

"Evil you say? Don't see what you would know about that." Grunted Kasimar though the E word had caught his attention.

"I assure you I am a monstrous villain; completely chaotic evil and I have my own theme music."

Wallace took out a remote and pressed the button. Like on the dock evil organ music began to play.

"Ok; where did that music come from?" Asked Kasimar in confusion. "But it doesn't matter; what are you proposing?"

"Don't you see? We could rule this game!" exclaimed Wallace while rubbing his hands together. "With my intellect and scheming and your lack of compassion, underhanded cruelty and huge strength we'll be unbeatable. Mwahahahaha!"

"So; you're offering me an alliance?" Asked Kasimar. "Well … ok; I'll give you a trial run for today, if we do well enough and maybe hurt someone then I'm joining you, if not I'll break your legs. Deal?"

Kasimar extended his hand and Wallace quickly shook it.

"Now come my R.H.M, into the labyrinth!" Said Wallace as he hurried towards the challenge.

"R.H.M?" Asked Kasimar as he followed.

"Right hand man." Called back Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- Here comes trouble!**

**Kasimar: I don't do friendship … but causing pain is always enjoyable, maybe the winnable bad guy could help me; he could even give me some fresh ideas. **

**Wallace: Mwuhahaha! My first lackey; I may need more but I'll need to be careful who I approach. Until then I'll bide my time with Kasimar … this oughta be fun!**

* * *

Andy and Barney had not stopped running from the moment they got into the labyrinth of despair and had taken several random turns. They ran into a large room and stopped to catch their breath.

"So." Said Andy. "Any idea what we do now?"

"Well me first mate; I think we have to get through the obstacles." Said Barney

Barney pointed ahead and Andy followed his arm. In the room ahead were several pillars in a row; they looked a little unstable and below them was a pit of water that was likely to be cold … VERY cold.

"Onward to adventure!" Yelled Barney.

Barney charged forwards and jumped onto the first and second and third. He seemed to have a great sense of balance as he speedily cleared the gaps. He leapt from the last one and actually somersaulted in the air and landed perfectly. Andy watched all this with his jaw open.

"Your turn Andy me heartie!" Called Barney from across the gap.

Andy looked across; it was ten meter gap with an increasingly unstable pillar each meter. Andy shrugged; if Barney could do it then why couldn't he?

"To infinity and beyond!" Yelled Andy as he leapt onto the first pillar. It wobbled a little; as it was the first of the ten it was the most stable.

"You can do it savvy?" Called Barney encouragingly.

Andy leapt to the second; he landed safely and did the same for the third and the fourth.

"This is easy." Said Andy as he jumped to the fifth pillar.

* * *

**Confessional- The forbidden words**

**Andy (dripping wet). I shouldn't have said that ... and the water was really cold!**

* * *

In a light of poetic irony the pillar jerked to the side as Andy landed on it and he fell off the side and fell into the cold water. It was very cold and Andy scrambled to the ladder to get out; he quickly climbed and shivered on solid ground.

"Not bad Andy; but you'll need to do better next time. Yo ho!" Yelled Barney again as ran to the next room.

"Wait up pirate." Called Andy as he ran after the wild genki guy as fast as he could.

A distance away from the 'space pirate' duo; Irene, Mable, Lavender and Carlton were walking down a red lit corridor. Maybe red bulbs were used to give the effect of fear or anger; either way they were cool. Currently Mable was getting a little annoyed by Carlton's constant whimpering.

"Are you scare?" She asked Carlton.

"Very! I'm scared of the color red; that and light bulbs." Whimpered the scare baby teen.

"How can you be scared of a color?" Asked Mable.

"It's called Chromophobia." Explained Lavender intelligently. "It's the fear of a specific color, I don't know what causes it but a lot of people who suffer from it tend to avoid it or go to environments where it can't be found, like avoiding purple in the Antarctic."

* * *

**Confessional- Wimpiness taken to eleven**

**Carlton: I hate scary things; why can't the world be like a rainbow cloud filled sofa? Those things aren't scary … unless it's thunder clouds!** (Whimpers)

**Lavender: **(Smirking). **Bet you didn't expect a cheerleader to be that smart eh?**

* * *

"I don't like the Antarctic much." Said Irene. "There aren't any trees and the wildlife is only sub par. But how are you so smart if you're a cheerleader?"

"Because I'm not a dumb ditzy big chested blond like Lindsay from last season." Said Lavender with annoyance. "It's a stereotype I hope to prove wrong one way or another."

"Yet you do cheerleading?" Said Irene.

"Yes; it's a hobby and it's a good way to exercise. I'm also at the top of the cheering pyramid." Explained Lavender.

"Oh look; it's the reason for the despair in the Labyrinth's name." Said Mable as she gazed ahead.

As the four walked ahead they saw a small drop in the ground with electricity buzzing through it; it was only a short jump to get through but a fall would be painful indeed.

"So; who's first?" Asked Mable.

"Not me; I'm scared of electricity!" Whimpered Carlton as he backed away and shook like a leaf.

* * *

**Confessional- WIMP!**

**Mable: I knew that guy was useless. But I can't do anything about it now.**

* * *

"I'll go first." Said Lavender.

She backed up and leapt over and landed perfectly on the other side. She turned to the others and smiled.

"Nothing to it." Said Lavender. "Who's next?"

"Me!" Said Irene excitedly. "For trees!"

She easily cleared the gap as well. She high fived Lavender as Mable jumped across.

"I guess healthy eating lets you jump further. Ok Carlton; your turn." Said Mable.

"No way; I'm staying here." Whimpered Carlton as he shrunk away.

"Come on; grow a pair!" Called Mable before realizing that what she said wasn't too helpful. "What I mean is; you have to face your fears if you are to ever conquer them, and you don't want to lose on the first day right? Think about why you auditioned!"

"My parents signed me up." Said Carlton sadly. "I wanna go home!"

"Please jump." Said Lavender kindly. "You're just making yourself more scared; and who knows? You may surprise yourself!"

Carlton looked at the small gap, the electricity and then the three girls looking at him in encouragement.

"Ok I'll jump … just this once."

* * *

**Confessional- Oh the pain!**

**Irene- Poor Carlton; he didn't deserve what happened next. He's as unfortunate as a tree by a lumberjack's house!**

* * *

He backed up and jumped … but he didn't make it. He somehow tripped in mid air and fell into the small hole.

"AAAAAAAH!" Screamed Carlton as he was electrocuted.

"That looks painful." Said Irene with a flinch. "How many volts do you think it is?"

"Judging by his screams and the flickering … I'd say over nine thousand." Said Lavender.

"Come on; let's get him out." Said Mable.

Elsewhere in the maze Daisy, Gary, Hector and Raven were walking over a walkway above a pit of what looked like blue jelly; Raven didn't even know you could _get_ blue jelly at all. They had been walking for a while now and Gary's patience stockpile was getting smaller and smaller. The reason was that daisy had been going on about how she was going to not only win but also keep the others from having fun; she apparently thought fun was naughty.

Hector was also annoyed but had more patience than Gary and thus was keeping his anger at bay. But Daisy was still fairly irritating.

Raven didn't want to get involved as that would draw attention to herself as she hated attention; maybe Daisy would stop talking soon.

"… So I had no choice but to tattle on him and put him in detention for a month." Said Daisy smugly. "I mean hello? He forgot his homework and didn't tell his teacher."

"If I may say something miss." Said Hector. "Could you kindly lower the volume and stop articulating?"

"Are you telling me to shut up?" Said Daisy in anger.

"It's feasible." Said Hector. "But I mean it kindly; I can't help but notice how annoyed Gary is getting and that he may want to choke you."

"You read my mind." Said Gary. "And I bet Raven wants you to be quiet as well."

"Really? Do you?" Asked Daisy to Raven in a deadly whisper.

"Well … y-y-you're a l-l-little t-talkative." Said Raven.

"You just don't see how things work." Said Daisy. "You're just a little shy nobody and I'm an a star grade student with degree in basket weaving. And I'm will control you all beca-."

Raven was interrupted because Gary shoved her off the walkway in annoyance. She screamed as she fell down and into the sticky gooey jelly.

"Let's keep things simple right?" Said Gary as he dusted his hands.

* * *

**Confessional- Jelly babies!**

**Gary: I bet you at home wanted to do that as well. **(Throws arms up). **She's as annoying as an orange!**

**Raven: Gary w-w-was a l-little h-h-harsh … but it w-w-was understandable."**

**Hector: The first use of jelly? Eating it. The second use of jelly? A sticky mess to push stuck up snobs into.**

**Daisy: (**Covered in blue jelly and _furious_). **Those little RATS! When I find them I'm gonna wring … their … necks!**

* * *

"Good s-s-s-show Gary; you b-b-bring a good name to t-t-t-t-teen chefs all o-o-o-over Canada" Said Raven.

"And I still think she isn't all she says she is, she probably can't subtract a denominator from a common factor and additialise it's high bearing decimal."

"You're v-very s-s-smart H-hector." Said Raven.

"I just do my best." Said Hector as they reached the end of the walkway and Daisy's screams began to fade.

"W-w-w-was it necessary to push h-h-er into t-the j-j-j-jelly?" Asked Raven.

"Of course." Said Gary. "She was annoying, unoriginal, unlikable and her outfit was stupid. I did what we all wanted to do."

"I admit it did look rather enjoyable." Said Hector with a chuckle.

"Now let's get out of here before she catches up." Said Gary as they hurried away.

* * *

Quana, Spider and Nakia were walking down a wide passageway; one about the size of a boulder. The passage stretched onwards for a fair distance … yet not an obstacle was in sight.

"Well this is easy." Smiled Nakia as she ran a hand through her perfect hair. "No obstacles and just a long distance to the next room. We'll win for sure."

"I don't think it'll *sneeze* be that easy." Said Spider sickly and wisely. "I've seen this in movies; once *gag* we get a certain distance down the hall a trap *cough* will spring."

"I don't think so." Said Nakia. "From my experience people with bad hair aren't too smart. But thanks for the tip."

Spider turned to Quana and sighed.

"I tried to warn her; curse my bad hair."

"Don't worry Spider." Said Quana kindly. "She's just a hair obsessed pretty girl; she has about as much depth as a puddle. But let's keep going before a trap _does_ get sprung."

They jogged after Nakia; the letter N representative was a short distance ahead and suddenly as she stepped on a distinguishable tile a click was heard followed by a rumbling.

"What did you do?" Asked Quana. "Did you spring a trap?"

"I don't think so." Said Nakia. "It's not like ..."

She trailed off and her eyes widened, she then screamed and zoomed off towards the exit. Spider and Quana looked behind and also screamed. A boulder with an angry face carved in was rolling quickly towards them.

"AAAAAAARGH!" They both screamed in usion as they dashed after Nakia. So this was why the distance was so long … they had to outrun a BOULDER; what the _hell_ was Chris thinking? As they ran Spider started to get a stitch.

"I think … I need … a doctor!" Gasped Spider as he clutched his gut.

"Keep running." Encouraged Quana. "I don't want a friend becoming a pancake!"

They continued despite Spiders pain and ran through the doorway at the end; the boulder slammed into the doorway and stopped with the angry face 'facing' the teens. Quana glared at Nakia.

"Ok seriously!" Growled the usually kind friendly singer. "You could've nearly gotten yourself and us killed! And Spider warned you of danger; and you didn't listen why? Because of his hair!"

"Well sorry; but bad hair is just … unreliable." Said Nakia weakly.

"That doesn't make any sense! Grrrr." Growled Quana. "Ok; let's just keep going, we might be near the end."

Quana walked onwards as Spider went beside Nakia.

"It's *gag* kinda stupid to *sneeze* judge people on their hair. Sorry but I *cough* gotta side with *splutter* Quana on this."

Nakia watched Spider walk away and growled; how could a kid with bad hair put her in her place? Well; she'd sort him out later; both her and her hair would prevail.

* * *

**Confessional- Bad hair day?**

**Spider: Most people don't go ***cough*** near me in the few times I'm in public; at ***splutter*** least Quana gives me a chance … I wonder ***sneeze*** if I can make any other friends? Hopefully. **

**Quana: I'm disliking Nakia more and more … and a boulder? Chris you maniac!**

**Nakia: **(Brushing her hair). **Spider is a living bad hair day … plus he's contagious. He should be voted off for his own good really … depends which team he ends up on I suppose … if he makes it past tonight.**

* * *

Jimmy, Eleanor, Oscar and Xaria were trekking along through a dark room; it would have been hard if Xaria had not bought a torch.

"Typical." Grumbled Xaria. "Chris is too cheap to afford light bulbs; what a deadpan snarker, veesh."

"Oh lighten up." Said Jimmy cheerfully. "The dark has loads of wonderful things, the stars, the moon, bats, ghosts and even several amazing fish."

"Quite true." Agreed Eleanor. "You don't have to be so negative all the time."

"It's who I am and who I'll always be." Said Xaria crossly.

"When did you become such a complainer?" Asked Oscar. "Were you always like this or did it grow on you? I'm actually concerned."

"As I said; it's who I am, everything is so imperfect in our world that we might as well say what we think." Said Xaria.

"Well not everything is bad." Said Eleanor. "There are so many good things like the rainforest and the wildlife."

"The rainforest is too wet and the wildlife is creepy and ravenous." Said Xaria. "Oh look; our first obstacle, another thing to complain about."

Everyone looked ahead and saw a conveyor belt moving in the opposite way than the one they needed to go.

"This won't take but a moment." Said Oscar. "I'll go first."

Oscar bolted along the conveyer belt without the slightest bit of difficulty or sweat. He reached the other side in three seconds flat and smiled to the others.

"Whenever you're ready guys." Said Oscar as he began doing push ups. "I'll entertain myself while I wait."

"May as well get the inevitable over with." Said Xaria as she began to run along the conveyer belt at a slower speed than Oscar. She didn't stumble though and quickly reached the other side.

"Ok Jimmy; let's go." Said Eleanor as she and Jimmy ran on the constantly moving belt. Eleanor was getting closer and closer to the other side but Jimmy was having difficulty. Just as Eleanor got to the other side Jimmy lost his footing and was sent back to the beginning.

"Hey guys." Called Jimmy. "I can't get over; my legs aren't strong enough."

"Well; hate to be a complainer, well, not really, but I guess we won't win now." Sighed Xaria.

"Don't give up yet." Said Eleanor. "I've got an idea."

Eleanor reached into her pocket and pulled out a gumball and made sure she had Jimmy's attention.

"Hey Jimmy; if you get across I'll give you a gumball." Said Eleanor while hoping the plan would work.

It did. Jimmy grinned and zoomed across the conveyer belt even faster than Oscar. Eleanor handed him the gumball which he thanked her for and ate.

"Typical; a kid does anything for candy, so cliché." Grumbled Xaria.

"How did you know that would work?" Asked Oscar.

"Simple; at the campfire earlier when Chris said was the best thing ever Jimmy said candy. I think he could do great physical achievements if motivated by Candy."

"That's good logic; you'll be useful to whatever team you end on … now let's go, I don't want to lose on the first day." Said Oscar as he and the others walked onwards.

"Thanks again for the gumball Eleanor." Said Jimmy.

"No problem Jimmy; it's just a gumball."

'Well I'm grateful all the same. By the way; where are your ferrets; did you leave them somewhere?" Asked Jimmy.

"I left them in the sunshine by the mess hall; they'll need relaxation."

"Ferrets bite a lot." Muttered Xaria.

"Grouch." Muttered Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional- Grouch want … or DO you?**

**Xaria: I'm just easily irritated ok? It's no big deal, loads of people complain; like this guy Zachery from back home. He's takes complaining up to eleven … from my level!**

**Jimmy: I love candy; always have and always will. I just don't seem to put on much weight and I love the outdoors. One time me and the guys went camping in the woods while a maniac was out there! No lie!**

**Eleanor: Frost and Dandelion don't bite; they're cute and cuddly. People just don't give unusual pets a chance … and yet they don't complain about crocodile pets! Weird huh?**

* * *

Yessica, Zita and Patch were in another part of the labyrinth. They were on one side of a large gap; two spinning circular platforms were in between both sides. Zita was currently unscrewing a blue light bulb to steal while Patch was scratching his butt. Yessica looked across the gap and at the spinning platforms; she then looked over the edge and saw a pit of hot sauce … ouch.

"So guys; what do you think we should do?" Asked Yessica.

"Obviously we need to get to the other side; hang on, I'm just stealing the light bulb." Said Zita. She unscrewed it and stuffed it into her loot sack. "Ok; this won't be a problem, my balance and wall scaling skills will come in handy.

Zita slung her sack over her shoulder and jumped onto the first platform; she waited until she was at the other end and jumped onto the next. She then simply jumped onto the solid ground.

"Easy as stealing from an elderly home; come on, time is stealing." Said Zita as she leaned against a wall. "And I'm only waiting a short while."

* * *

**Confessional- Isn't the phrase time is money'?**

**Zita: I wasn't going to leave them but I had to motivate them somehow; I don't want to lose this early.**

* * *

"Ok Patch; you know what to do right?" Asked Yessica as she approached the edge.

"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh … *farts*."

"Ew eeeeewww eeeeeewww!" Wailed Yessica as she jumped onto the spinning platform and began to cross to the other side.

As she did a fly buzzed past Patch's head; he laughed like a child and began following it.

"Here Mr. fly; I just wanna taste you." Said Patch as he approached the edge.

Yessica finished her traversal of the gap and turned to Zita.

"Thanks for waiting."

"No problem; I had nothing better to do." Said Zita. "Oh look; fat ass is about to fall."

Yessica turned around and saw Patch standing on the edge of the platform trying to grab a fly. He was less than an inch from the edge.

"Patch! Go back!" Called Yessica.

* * *

**Confessional- What … an … idiot!**

**Yessica: Maybe I should have only bought Zita along; but what happened next was inevitable.**

* * *

It was too late; Patch made a grab for the spider and fell down into the hot sauce. Zita sniggered and burst out laughing and fell down in hysterics while Yessica looked down into the hot sauce in horror. Patch surfaced and licked his lips.

"Mmmmm! Yummy hot sauce, my favorite!" Said Patch stupidly as he began to swim around.

"Patch! Come up the ladder!"

"Do I have to mum?" Asked Patch with a whine.

"I'm not your mother … and yes you have to!"

Patch sighed and swam to the edge and began slowly climbing up.

"What an idiot." Mumbled Yessica. "Usually I have infinite patience … but that guy? *sigh*." Groaned Yessica.

"I hear ya; he's brain dead … but it'll make it easier to steal from him!" Grinned Zita snidely.

Fifi, Tabitha, Vinnie and Uzuri were walking along a passageway with swinging balls on pendulums. They had been weaving in between them and needless to say it … but it was difficult. The pendulums swung very erratically and were hard to predict. As they made their crossing one of them hit Vinnie and flung him to the side.

* * *

**Confessional- Ouch.**

**Vinnie: That … kinda hurt.**

* * *

"See!" Said Fifi meanly. "I told you a guy would hold us back. Get up you stupid man!"

"You're really getting on my nerves." Said Vinnie as he got to his feet and ran past the last pendulum. "Why do you hate guys so much; isn't that a bit sexist?"

"You all deserve it!" Sneered Fifi. "You've made women your slaves all through history and even today we aren't treated completely equally. And I'm just stating my views; nothing wrong with that."

"This is kinda mean." Said Uzuri sweetly. "Let's ask my doll what she thinks!"

She pulled the string on the doll as it began to speak.

"_Knife_ _to the throat, side to side, blood spews out, now you can gloat! Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll which made Fifi scream in fear.

"Get it away from me." Whimpered the hardcore feminist. "That doll is an abomination!"

"Don't worry; she won't hurt you; she's not going to cut off your head, pull out your brain and use it to paint her house! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional- No comment on the creepiness**

**Uzuri: I love my little Miss Emo doll! I've had her for three years and I still haven't heard all nine thousand sayings!**

* * *

Fifi looked freaked out and was quick to move away from the creepy blond girl.

"C'mon everyone; don't fight." Said Tabitha. "We've got a common goal here and that is to win; we're probably ahead of all the other teams by a country mile. So let's calm down and keep the peace."

"Fine; but keep that doll AND yourself away from me." Said Fifi to Uzuri who just nodded.

Meanwhile up above them on a walkway were Kasimar and Wallace. Wallace was currently explaining some of his strategies for evil.

"The best thing to do would be rip out someone's eye, pee in the socket and give them AIDS! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

"That is pretty hardcore; but if you want to be taken seriously as a villain you've got to rip someone's head off." Said Kasimar.

"Good idea … do you hear that?"

"What?" Asked Kasimar as he listened.

"It's the sound of victims!" Smirked Wallace. "And they're right below us!"

Both bad guys looked over the side of the platform and saw Fifi, Uzuri, Tabitha and Vinnie down below. They were talking and Tabitha seemed to be making them apologize or just get along.

"I have an idea for classic evil … water bombs!"

* * *

**Confessional- Eviiiiiiii!**

**Wallace: Oh I'm such a bad guy aren't I?**

* * *

Wallace whipped out a bunch of water balloons from absolutely nowhere and took aim. He 'locked on' and threw one.

Down below Uzuri was trying to apologize for scaring Fifi when a water balloon hit her on the head and soaked her hair.

"What was that?" Asked Vinnie.

Another water balloon came down and got him in the gut which wet his shirt.

"Water balloons!" Yelled Tabitha. "Someone is firing them at us; but who and from where?"

A trip of water balloons sailed down rapidly and hit Fifi; a fourth one hit Tabitha on the shoes.

"Not the shoes!" Screamed Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional- What is it with girls and shoes?**

**Tabitha: These shoes cost me five hundred dollars! Urgh!**

* * *

Up above Wallace was laughing like a maniac but Kasimar had another idea.

"Let's take it up to eleven!" Grinned the Bully as he chucked a brick down. We don't know where he got the brick and probably never will.

As soon as Vinnie saw the brick come down and narrowly miss them he panicked.

"We gotta get out of here!" He yelled as he took off down the hallway.

"Follow the leader so our brains don't leak the gooey stuff." Giggled Uzuri as she followed Vinnie.

"Can't have a man leading us." Said Fifi as she shot off after her team mates.

Tabitha looked up and spotted the distinctive outline of two figures.

"Whoever you two are; I'm gonna make you sorry!" Yelled Tabitha as she ran just as another brick was thrown down.

"Ah; it warms by black heart and soul to see some pure evil going on." Said Wallace as he wiped a happy tear away. "Come my right hand man, we still have to finish the race."

"I'm there dude." Grinned Kasimar.

The two bad guys continued off the walkway and into another room. This one was trap free and had a door leading off. Most noticeably was that there were two chests next to each other on a table.

"Aha! Victory is ours!" Ginned Wallace as he reached into both chests and pulled out two golden pieces of paper.

"It's just paper; so what?" Asked Kasimar rudely.

"Don't you see? Look at the word on the paper."

Wallace handed Kasimar a piece of paper and upon reading it Kasimar laughed evilly in triumph.

"Yahahahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar for he knew that no matter what happened he would be quite … safe.

* * *

**Confessional- Bullies and bad guys. Oh my!**

**Kasimar: With this baby I can take my time and be a jerk and nobody will vote me off!**

**Wallace: Mwahahahaha!**

* * *

A distance away Barney was running along without showing signs of tiring while Andy struggled to keep up behind him; so far they had gone through a giant bowling alley (and they were the skittles!), a compacter and a room filled with bright light and mirrors. He was exhausted and had no idea when it would be over. Barney was pretty nice but was quite eccentric and very fast.

"Can you slow down Barney? I know you're shooting for the stars in this contest but I need a rest!" Said Andy tiredly.

"But why rest me heartie? The finish is right over there!" Grinned Barney as he pointed to the exit up ahead.

"Barney you scurvy dog; we did it!" Cheered Andy as they ran full speed towards the exit, out of the Labyrinth and over the finish line.

"What a challenge." Said Andy but even though he was exhausted he was smiling as there was no sign of anyone else.

"Congratulations Andy and Barney." Said Chris as he walked up. "You two are the first here and you both receive immunity for tonight's bonfire ceremony. This is fitting."

"What's fitting Captain?" Asked Barney.

"That the first two here were the contestants representing the first two letters. Good job guys! Now if you'll excuse me it's time for my latté."

"Woohoo!" Cheered Andy. "Good job Barney; we're into next week, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

"I agree me first mate, I agree. Yo ho!"

* * *

**Confessional- Space pirates!**

**Andy: Looks like Barney could be a great friend while I'm here; his energy can really come in handy … and his accent is kinda amusing. Woo!**

* * *

Back in the Labyrinth of Despair the challenge was still on for Lavender, Irene, Mable and Carlton. Currently they were walking along a hallway with multiple tripwires all around. Carlton was unconscious from his electrocution earlier and Mable was carrying him. He wasn't actually that heavy. Speaking of Carlton; if he were conscious it is safe to assume he would be afraid of the trip wires.

"This whomps!" Cried Mable in frustration. "We lost loads of time getting Carlton out of that trap and now he's unconscious … and I have to carry him!"

"It could be worse." Said Irene.

"You're right; how exactly?"

"The earth could be without trees." Said Irene sorrowfully.

"I guess that could be worse." Said Mable. "But how much longer until the scare baby wakes up?"

"It depends on how long his body and mind need to recover; he was shocked something fierce." Said Lavender as she stepped over a trip wire.

Mable was near the end of the room and saw a trip wire higher than the others; maybe it would be better to go under it … but then again because of Carlton she would have to go over. She raised one leg and slowly stepped it over successfully. As she started to raise the other leg she tripped the wire and fell down. Before she could get up a load of icy water with TADPOLES in it fell down and covered her and Carlton who jolted back to reality.

"What happened, where … ARRRGH! TADPOLES! I'm scared of tadpoles!"

* * *

**Confessional- Is he scared of everything?**

**Mable: Wimp. And I thought my cousin was a scaredy cat.**

* * *

"At least I don't have to carry you anymore." Sighed Mable. "And it seems we've reached the end of the room; and look what we have here."

Just in front of them a slide was leading down further in the Labyrinth. Carlton backed away.

"Oh don't tell me you're afraid of slides." Pleaded Mable.

"That and see-saws, swings, jungle gyms, grass and round-a-abouts." Cowered Carlton fearfully.

"What's the problem?" Asked Lavender as she and Irene ran up.

"Carlton is afraid of slides!" Said Mable in exasperation.

"So what do we do?" Asked Irene.

"My strategy is … PUSH!"

Lavender shoved Carlton forwards and he landed on the slide and began going down, screaming all the way.

"I had no choice." Shrugged Lavender. "He would've taken all day."

"This is great. I love slides!" Smiled Irene as she slid down followed by Lavender and Mable.

"HEEEEEELP!" Screamed Carlton in terror.

* * *

A distance below the scare baby and three girls a certain three some were climbing a ladder; I am of course talking about Spider, Quana and Nakia, who were climbing in that order.

"I hate climbing." Said Nakia. "It ruins my hair."

"Why do you *sneeze* care about your hair so *cough* much?" Asked Spider woozily.

"Because it's my prized possession! Every girl at school wishes they have my hair; I'm brilliantly brunette." Boasted Nakia

"No arguments there but it is *gag* just hair." Said Spider with a cough.

"Shut it." Snapped Nakia.

"Leave him alone." Said Quana firmly. "You're probably jealous he's more interesting than you because you're as interesting as a wet carrot!"

"I am interesting; I have wonderful hair."

* * *

**Confessional- Peter hare?**

**Nakia: Wonderful indeed!**

* * *

"That is preciously my point." Smirked Quana victoriously.

They reached the top of the ladder and looked around; the it was right ahead and was the most wonderful thing all three had seen all day.

"We may have won!" Cheered Nakia as she dashed for the exit.

"Maybe the *cough* prize will be *cough* some cough medicine." Said Spider hopefully.

"Maybe." Said Quana.

They ran out into the sunshine and over the finish line; already standing there were Andy and Barney who were relaxing in the sun.

"Darn! We didn't win." Whined Nakia.

"Don't worry Nakia." Said Chris. "You, Quana and spider bring up third, fourth and fifth so you all have immunity for tonight."

"Which way is *gag* the confessional?" Asked Spider sickly.

"Over there next to the mess hall." Said Chris. "Need to confess something?"

"Actually I need to be sick." Groaned Spider as he ran for the confessional.

* * *

**Confessional- Gag reflex?**

**Spider: **(Pukes in the confessional toilet). **I knew that food wouldn't agree with me. ***Sneeze*

* * *

"Good job fellow winners." Said Andy as he offered Quana and Nakia a hand. Only Quana took it.

"That challenge was mental!" Said Quana. "We got chased by a boulder and went through a sewer … but we found a ladder to get out. I guess immunity makes it worthwhile."

"Boulder? Try falling into ice cold water! And Barney would never slow down! But he's cool; pirates have such bad reputations nowadays."

"I care absolutely nothing for Samolia pirate's first mate!" Said Barney as he got up from sun bathing. "They give Blackbeard and the sea shanties a bad name! Yo ho Arrrrr!"

"You're right; he is cool." Said Quana in agreement with Andy.

At that moment Carlton, Irene, Mable and Lavender ran out of the maze panting; as they ran over the finish line. Mable did a head count and groaned.

"Oh man! There's already four here; that means only one of us can get immunity."

"Actually none of you do; Spider has also arrived, he's just done to be sick in the confessional.." Grinned Chris unkindly. "You four along with any who come after you are fair game at the Bonfire Ceremony."

Chris laughed his signature sadistic chuckle and left while Lavender sighed.

"Well; we did our best but we'll have to try harder next time I suppose." Said Lavender.

"Maybe we would have won if not for Carlton." Said Mable crossly. "He did cost us a few minutes when he got electrocuted."

"Maybe … but then again maybe not." Said Lavender. "But we didn't come dead last right?"

"True!" Smiled Irene. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to celebrate by hugging some trees."

Irene ran off and Mable raised an eyebrow.

"Well; she takes her stereotype literally." Said Mable with a chuckle.

* * *

**Confessional- Trees have feelings!**

**Mable: Today wasn't too bad; I made some friends and even though I didn't win I feel I did reasonable.**

**Lavender: I'll have to think of another strategy for next challenge; I hope I end up on a good team. I'm doing this for cheerleaders everywhere.**

* * *

Meanwhile back in the labyrinth Gary, Hector and Raven were moving at a leisurely pace; it was nice to be able to hear themselves think now that Daisy wasn't bugging them; seriously, what was that girls problem? A few pages short of a text book she indeed was.

"Isn't this nice? It feels like the drill in my skull has been switched off." Said Gary happily. "

"I have a similar feeling; it is like my cranium can finally articulate without being suffocated by the banshee." Said Hector in agreement.

"What?" Asked Gary.

"I mean that I'm glad you got rid of Daisy." Simplified Hector.

"S-s-she w-was a b-bit of a n-nonce." Said Raven in nervous agreement.

"You haven't spoken much Raven; don't you have much to say?"

"I'm j-j-just a l-little shy." Said Raven.

"Taken up to eleven." Said Hector.

"Been visiting TV tropes eh?" Asked Gary.

"A bit; one must stay informed on the latest TV jargon so as to remain the coolest nerd." Smiled Hector before stopping. "Hang on; we've got a problem.

Hector was right; in front of them was a door with a padlock and near the ceiling on a shelf was the key. It was way out of reach by far.

"What do you think we should do Hector? I'm better with catering than I am with logic problems."

"Well … I'm sorry but … I don't see a way of getting up there. Even if we went on each others shoulders we'd still be too short to reach."

"I've got no ideas." Said Gary with a shrug. "Guess we'll have to do another way."

"N-not necessarily g-g-guys." Said Raven. "Hand me y-your spatula G-g-gary."

Gary handed Raven his beloved cooking utensil despite not knowing what she was going to do. Raven took aim and threw the spatula towards the platform; it hit the underside and knocked the key from its position and down to the floor.

"H-h-here you g-go guys." Said Raven as she picked up the spatula and key and handed them to Gary and Hector.

"A most ingenious idea Raven." Smiled Hector. "I wonder what other abilities you have in that bubbling mind of yours."

Raven just nodded as Hector unlocked the padlocked door with the key and they entered to the next room.

* * *

**Confessional- Coming out of the shell?**

**Hector: I think Raven would easily dominate the competition if she opened up a little more. In time, in time.**

* * *

Oscar, Jimmy, Eleanor and Xaria were still passing the obstacles in the Labyrinth and Xaria was wondering if the maze even HAD an exit.

"This is just great." Grumbled Xaria. "We've been walking for ages and no sign of an exit. Life bites."

"Don't focus on the negatives." Said Jimmy. "Think of the positives! Like starry nights or how beautiful rainbows are."

"That would be good advice if I cared about either of those things." Said Xaria.

"Dead end." Said Oscar.

In front of them was a door without a handle; it was thick and looked like no amount of force would open it. It seemed to be locked from the other side.

"Great; we've going to lose now" Sighed Xaria. "What should we do now?"

"We might have to find another way." Said Oscar. "Though I don't think that we'll win if we do that."

Eleanor looked around and saw a small vent in the wall next to the door; it looked fairly loose and maybe someone could get through it; but that person would have to be fairly small.

"Hey guys; I know how we can get through." Said Eleanor as she pointed to the vent. "Maybe one of us could get through there."

"Good idea." Said Oscar. "But there is no way I could get through; my muscles are too big."

"I can't do it; too big and too busy." Grumbled Xaria.

"I'll do it!" Smiled Jimmy. "I'm the smallest here."

Jimmy got down on all fours as Oscar pulled the vent off as though it was as unsticky as a broccoli. He crawled through and got up on the other side and saw a red button.

"That must be the button. Jimmy presses the button and the crowd goes wild!" Smiled Jimmy as he pressed the button. As he did the door swung open and his team mates stepped through.

"Nice one little buddy." Said Oscar while giving Jimmy a _strong_ handshake.

"Nothing to it; now let's get out of the maze. We may be in first place."

Confessional- Jim Jam!

Jimmy: I feel I did pretty good back there; what do YOU think. Huh? Huh?

With enough being said the four ran along the corridor and around a corner and came to a round room with many exits leading off; one had the word exit above it and light shining in the distance. With smiles of relief and victory (except Xaria) they charged out of the maze and over the finish line.

"Yeah!" Whooped Eleanor. "We made it!"

"Too bad we're not in the top five and don't get immunity." Pointed out Xaria glumly.

"What?" Asked Oscar in disbelief.

"She's right." Smiled Chris without sympathy. "You four could be voted of tonight; hopefully you won't be the first off."

"…Crap!" Muttered Oscar angrily.

At that Moment Gary ran over the line followed by Raven and Hector. He did a quick head count and sighed. So did Hector.

"We lost; but we may yet have another chance at victory tomorrow." Said Hector. "And we all played our part."

"Except Daisy." Mumbled Raven.

"Well; she slowed us down … and she doesn't have immunity either." Said Gary.

"I think we've done enough to get into day two." Said Hector as he relaxed in the sun.

"W-w-wonder what t-t-teams we'll b-be on." Said Raven quietly.

"Hopefully one better than the Killer Bass." Said Gary as he twirled his spatula idly.

"Amen to that my friend." Said Hector.

* * *

In the Labyrinth Yessica, Zita and patch were making slow progress. It was mainly because Patch had taken ten tries to get out of the hot sauce pit; in fact, he actually liked the hot sauce. They were presently running full speed down a dark hallway, Zita's thief flashlight made this quite easy but Patch kept complaining.

"I'm hungry! Can we stop for ice cream?" Asked Patch while rubbing his growling gut.

"Will you quit your bellyaching both metaphorically and literally?" Asked Zita with irritation. "That's the fifth time you've asked for ice cream; why would a labyrinth have ice cream anyway?"

"I agree with Zita; could you please be quiet?"

In response to this Patch farted.

"Eeeeewww!" Cried Yessica as she ran on ahead to escape the smell. Zita followed on with Patch just a short distance behind them. As they ran they didn't see a group of four people step out in front of them.

BAM!

Yessica and Zita crashed into Vinnie and Uzuri with Tabitha and Fifi standing just a few steps away.

"Watch where you're going Vinnie!" Snapped Fifi. "Running into a pair of girls like that!"

* * *

**Confessional- Pink hair? And an Afro? Crazy!**

**Fifi: Just typical of a man to knock a girl down. Humph!**

* * *

"I didn't mean to." Said Vinnie as he got up. "I didn't see them coming."

"It's ok; we were running to escape Patch's fart." Grumbled Zita as she got up and helped Yessica to her feet.

"Thanks." Said Yessica. "So; do any of you know where the exit is?"

"Good question." Said Tabitha. "Vinnie; any ideas?"

"I think it's over there." Said Vinnie as he pointed towards the light at the end of the tunnel with his metal arm.

"Shut up! Now; the way I see it, we need to go that way because of the light." Said Fifi smugly.

"That's what I said." Said Vinnie in annoyance.

"Whatever; let's get going." Said Fifi.

At that moment Patch walked up and stood with them.

"H guys! What's silent but deadly?"

"Ooo; I don't know! I ghost who enters a victim's body and devours their bloodstream vein to vein?" Asked Uzuri eagerly.

Patch farted again very loudly.

"Funny huh?" He asked while oblivious to the fact that everyone was choking.

"That wasn't silent!" Choked Zita as she sped off to the exit.

"Wait up thief girl." Called Uzuri as she ran after Zita.

The others all ran away from Patch and out of the Labyrinth into daylight. They ran over the finish line and completed the challenge but didn't cheer; they saw how many other contestants had arrived and new immunity had escaped their grasp. Patch followed and crossed the line; he didn't seem to unhappy; he just picked his nose.

"Darn." Sighed Zita. "This is worse than when I got caught stealing the principles birthday cake."

"We'll do better next time." Said Yessica.

"If there is a next time." Said Zita. "See ya; I'm gonna steal some silverware from the mess hall."

"My nose is crusty; cool." Said Patch with a chuckle.

Tabitha sighed; she didn't have immunity for today. But given how she had acted she probably wouldn't be targeted for elimination. She just needed to find someone suitable to eliminate.

* * *

**Confessional Antagonist or jerk?**

**Tabitha: I'm in no danger; but I should try to vote off a big threat first. Question is … who? But first I put my plan into action, get some allies and act nice. Not my style.**

* * *

"Well everyone; I think that even though we failed we all did good today."

"Thanks Tabitha." Said Vinnie with a mild smile.

"You're nicer than the feeling you get when you scorch ants with a magnifying glass." Grinned Uzuri.

"But we're going to need to pick someone to eliminate; if you want to vote with me you are welcome to but you'll need to think about not only who you don't like but also who is more a threat to your victory." Said Tabitha craftily in a manipulation attempt.

"Sure; I'll vote with you." Smiled Uzuri. "You're different than most, you don't run away when I talk about popping eyeballs. Teehee!"

"So who's *cough* left to finish? Asked Spider to Barney.

"My eyes tell me we be missing Wallace, Kasimar and Daisy the cannon fodder girl yo ho!"

"Well none of them were *gag* very nice *cough* anyway so maybe we could vote *choke* them off." Wheezed Spider.

"A good idea but I prefer to count me eggs before they hatch me heartie." Said Barney cheerfully.

At that moment the sounds of evil laughter were heard and Wallace and Kasimar exited the labyrinth and walked over the line.

"Ha! Bet most of you didn't get immunity!" Sneered Kasimar. "What losers!"

"Well you didn't get immunity either." Retorted Lavender. "And they say cheerleaders are dumb; bullies are practically brain dead."

"Oh yeah? Well look what me and Wallace have!" Smirked Kasimar as he and Wallace showed Lavender the gold paper.

"Oh; I was wondering who got those!" Said Chris as he ran up. "Those papers mean that Kasimar and Wallace are immune to tonight's vote."

"Excellent! Evil finally prevails. Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace Manically while turning on his organ theme music.

"Damn it!" Sighed Eleanor. "It would have been good to vote the bully off."

"There's always next time." Said Carlton. "Even though next time will probably be as scary. Eep!"

Just then a final figure exited the maze; one dripping with blue jelly. It was Daisy and she looked livid as she crossed the line in last place. She walked right up to Gary and snarled.

"You little #bleep#; how DARE you push me into disgusting blue jelly! It's unhealthy and ruins your intelligence!"

"I don't see how." Said Gary. "No foods have the ability to do that."

"I'm so voting for you tonight you little wretch!" Growled Daisy horrifically but before you could continue Chris sounded an air horn and all twenty sic campers faced him.

"Well done everyone; or at least some of you. The challenge is over and you've all finished in time. Hopefully this challenge hasn't made you want to quit. Haha! Anyway; the winners who have immunity are Andy, Barney, Quana, Spider and Nakia. Wallace and Kasimar found the secret immunity tickets in the labyrinth so they are also safe … but as for everyone else … you could be eliminated. But now it's … dinner time. Think about who you want to vote off and come to the bonfire pit in one hour. Chow."

Chris spun on his heel and left as the contestants trudged to the mess hall for another disgusting meal; some contestants glared at others.

* * *

**Confessional- Who to choose?**

**Quana: I'd vote for Nakia if she wasn't immune … but first I'll think about who is both weak and unlikable …Hmmmm.**

**Daisy: This place is like my school; I start out hated but then I become respected and obeyed. My vote is obvious; stupid blue jelly. **(Grumbles)

**Spider: I had** *cough* **a pretty good time in the challenge; I** *hard cough* **wonder how far I'll get? Probably not too far being that I'm ***gag*** sick … but making friends who don't care about your illnesses is always fun. But who to vote for?**

**Carlton: I hope it isn't dark at the ceremony; I'm scared of the dark!**

**Yessica: I'm gonna vote Patch; reason being is that he made me and Zita lose immunity and he stinks. Nothing personal.**

**Gary: I really hope Daisy is outta here; she's annoying and ruins everything.**

**Vinnie: I'm voting Fifi; she's sexist to guys and I didn't even do anything to her!**

**Tabitha: I know who I'm voting for; I convinced a small number of people to vote with me; humble convinced of course … this'll be fun.**

* * *

While the contestants ate their disgusting food Gary walked into the kitchen to speak with Chef.

"So chef; have you decided on my offer yet?" Asked Gary.

"I don't appreciate you being in my kitchen ... but as for my answer. I've decided … yes; you can tutor me and I'll let you cook for your team. But remember … I am still the adult here so don't annoy me."

"Don't worry Chef; by the end of this show you shall be quite a good chef; maybe you'll live up to your name."

Gary left the kitchen while Chef grinned to himself.

"Finally I can cook like mama used to." He said with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional- Chef actually cooking?**

**Gary: I think this will be fun; teaching others to cook is always fun; who knows, if I cook good food for the team they may keep me around.**

* * *

All twenty six contestants sat around the bonfire ceremony area; after a disgusting meal from Chef Hatchet they had cast their votes and someone was going to be leaving shortly. Chris stood before the campers at the Ceremony looking at them somberly.

"Campers; welcome to the bonfire ceremony, the place of elimination. Here is not a place you want to be; unless you have immunity you swim in dangerous waters when you sit upon your stumps or logs. You ill notice I have a tray of twenty five marshmallows … and yet twenty six campers sitting in front of me. If my math is right then one of you will not get a marshmallow; that person is eliminated and must IMMEDIENTLY walk the dock of shame and catch the boat of losers … that means you are out, and you can't come back …*ever*." Finished Chris.

"Just get on with it; I've got evil schemes to think up!" Said Wallace impatiently.

"Ok, fine." Pouted Chris. "If I call your name you are safe, if not then you are out. And just so you know; this ceremony has a little … twist. Hahaha!"

Chris laughed for a while some contestants sighed.

"Any chance of continuing?" Asked Oscar.

"Sure, whatever; first up are those who are immune."

"Wallace"

"Spider"

"Quana"

"Nakia"

"Kasimar"

"Andy"

"Barney"

The seven challenge winners walked over to claim their marshmallows which left nineteen still seated.

"Ok; now to continue; also safe tonight are-."

"Lavender"

"Hector"

"Eleanor"

"Oscar"

"Irene"

"Raven"

"Yessica"

"Zita"

"Tabitha"

"Mable"

"Jimmy"

"Uzuri"

Chris stopped calling names and turned to the remaining seven still seated.

"You seven all got votes; some more than others; the ones of you who are safe are-."

"Vinnie"

"Gary.

"Xaria"

"Carlton"

"Fifi"

Only Patch and Daisy were left seated; Daisy looked quite surprised while Patch twiddled his thumbs while humming.

"Patch … Daisy … this is the final marshmallow; it is time for someone to leave … and be voted off first. The tension is high but it is time to sadly break it because the final marshmallow goes to

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

"Me."

Chris ate the last Marshmallow; Daisy looked stunned and in disbelief while Patch just took out a chocolate bar and ate it.

"What … but … you … you ate my marshmallow!" Cried Daisy in horror.

"Remember I said there was a twist? This is a double elimination!" Laughed Chris. "So Daisy and Patch; it's dock of shame time."

"Ok; it was fun while it lasted." Shrugged Patch as he left to get his stuff.

"No!" Growled Daisy.

"What?" Asked Chris in confusion.

"I'm not going; I deserve to stay, not those losers!"

"But you go the most votes; it's the rules … and you're a rule follower right?" Asked Chris as he signaled to Chef.

"I'm not going! I'm going to win! I'm AAAARGH!"

The 'AAAARGH' was because Chef had grabbed her and dragged her towards the boat while she was kicking and screaming like a baby. Chef tossed her onto the boat and climbed aboard while an Intern threw on her luggage. Patch climbed on with his stuff and waved goodbye to the others. The boat pulled away from the dock and drove away and soon Daisy's screams were out of earshot.

The remaining twenty four campers looked at Chris who shrugged.

"I didn't think she would act that way … but more drama and ratings!" Laughed Chris happily. "And now that there are twenty four of you we can divide you all by three … so it's time to decide the teams."

Chris signaled a nearby intern and a trolley of twenty four chests was wheeled in; the intern left as Chris reached behind the oil drum he stood by and showed the campers a tray of keys; a;; small and colored silver.

"Everyone pick a key and choose a chest; the contents will decide which team you're on."

There was a mad dash as everyone grabbed a key and hurried to different chests. The sounds of locks turning and chests opening amplified through the air.

"What's this?" Asked Quana as she took out a metal medal with a picture of a puzzle piece.

"That's a jigsaw piece; looks like you're on team puzzle." Said Chris. "Who else has a puzzle medal?"

"I do." Said Jimmy as he held his up."

"And me makes three." Said Eleanor.

"Team puzzle … not bad." Said Andy as he looked at his coin.

"What's this? It looks like a grenade." Said Lavender.

"That symbolizes you are part of team grenade." Said Chris. "You'll blow the ratings through the roof!"

"Looks like we're on the same team." Said Mable to Lavender.. "Maybe we could be like a duo; black and white, blue and orange."

"Looks like I'm with you girls!" Laughed Kasimar horribly. "This will be fun!"

"Well my R.H.M, we're on the same team; might as well be called Team Evil! Mwahahahaha!"

"Err … this is odd." Said Irene as she looked at her coin." It's got a picture of an angry banana with a buzz cut."

"Mine does too." Said Fifi.

"Looks like you're part of team jungle." Said Chris. "Ok; when you get back to camp, if you are on Team Puzzle then go to the left cabin. If you're in Team Grenade then go to the middle one. And if you're in Team Jungle then go to the right one."

The teams went back to their cabins that the interns were taking their luggage to. For Team Puzzle was Eleanor, Jimmy, Spider, Barney, Andy, Nakia, Quana and Zita.

For Team Grenade, the explosive named team the members were Lavender, Mable, Xaria, Kasimar, Wallace, Carlton, Oscar and Raven.

And for Team Jungle the Teamies were Tabitha, Uzuri, Vinnie, Fifi, Irene, Yessica, Gary and Hector.

As the teams went to bed Chris turned to the camera.

"And there you have it! The first episode of Total Drama Letterz! Daisy and Patch are gone and three teams have been formed! What will happen next time? Who will get eliminated? Tune in next time on Total Drama Letterz!

"And cut." Said the Camera intern.

"Well; I can taste the ratings of that episode … but I'd like to taste a latté more. Bring me my Latté!

* * *

**And thus ends the first episode :D Like it? Hate iot? Leave a review and let me know what you think!**

**The teams for reference...**

**Team Puzzle- Eleanor, Jimmy, Spider, Barney, Andy, Nakia, Quana, Zita**

**Team Grenade- Lavender, Mable, Xaria, Kasimar, Wallace, Carlton, Oscar and Raven**

**Team Jungle- Tabitha, Uzuri, Vinnie, Fifi, Irene, Yessica, Gary and Hector**


	3. Day 2 Part 1, Night Time and breakfast

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island or any of its characters (though I wish I did); thire rightful owners are teletoon and Cartoon Network. The alphabet concept doesn't belong to me either; it was first created by Frank15, if you want to read the story that inspired mine then go read Total Drama Alphabet; it's really good!

**The warning:** This story has over the top feminism, nose picking, love, bullying, seriously sad moments (near the end which is a long way from now), bullying and screaming. You have been warned. But it's nothing M rated.

**Pairings:** You'll find out eventually.

**Notes: **Another chapter, another challenge. This is one I havn't seen before so it's possibly a first. If not then let me know. Also Bad-asp has made an elimination chart for this story on Deviantart; the link is in my profile. Also I've updated my profile to link to a themesong for each character; a song that really suits them.

**Poll: **You can still vote on your favourite character so if you want to then be my guest!

**Let's get this party started!**

**

* * *

**

Chris was standing on the dock of shame in a coat at night time; the moon was out and hundreds of stars shone down from above. The sea shone in the moonlight and the waves rippled gently. Chris waved to the camera while holding a latté and smiled.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz." Began Chris dramatically. "Twenty six campers with nothing in common except that their names began with a different letter arrived on Wawanakwa Island. There were some friendships between people like Mable and Lavender as well as Quana and Spider … and there were dramatic conflicts with Nakia disliking Spider for his hair and also Gary disliking Daisy for her nasty attitude. You can taste the ratings eh?"

Chris sipped his latté and savored the flavor.

"The challenge was simple; go through a labyrinth as fast as possible and get to the finish line. For some like Barney and Andy this was simple while for Yessica and Zita it was quite a challenge. Andy, Barney, Spider, Quana, Kasimar, Wallace and Nakia all got immunity which left the others eligible to be voted off. At the first bonfire ceremony it was down to Patch and Daisy … and they both lost! It was a double elimination; Daisy wasn't happy but who cares?"

Chris laughed sadistically and wiped a tear away.

"Twenty four campers remain in three teams of eight; which team will win? Team Puzzle, Team Grenade or Team Jungle? And who will be the next to walk the dock of shame? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

It had been a half an hour since Patch and Daisy had been voted off and the campers were tired after the first day; they would need sleep for tomorrow, who knew what kind of crazy challenge Chris would cook up? Currently the teams were in their sleep wear and were talking about what the crazy first day had bought them.

* * *

(**Team Puzzle, Guys)**

* * *

Jimmy, Spider, Andy and Barney were I their side of the cabin; in the room were two bunk beds and some drawers for their cloths. They had changed into their night wear and were in the process of choosing beds.

"Captain gets top bunk!" Yelled Barney as he climbed the ladder and up to his chosen bed.

"Looks like I'll have the bottom bunk." Said Andy as he got into the bed under Barney.

"Which bed do you want Spider?" Asked Jimmy.

"I should *cough* get the top bunk because *gag* that way if I cough in the night the *double cough* germs won't go up to anybody. I *splutter* don't want to infect anyone." Explained Spider.

"No problem." Smiled Jimmy.

Spider nodded and sneezed. He climbed the ladder and got into his bed and lay down.

* * *

**Confessional- Top or bottom?**

**Jimmy: I wanted the top bunk but I don't mind giving it to Spider. I mean come on! He's sick! He'll need relaxation and a good rest if he's to be in top condition for tomorrow's challenge.**

* * *

"So guys." Said Andy. "What do you think of the contest so far?"

"It be nice not being the first one to walk the plank! Yo ho!" Grinned Barney.

"Isn't it walk the dock." Asked Andy with a raised eyebrow.

"Nope!" Laughed Barney.

"I think today was fun!" Said Jimmy as he climbed into bed and pulled the covers over himself. "I made friends and had a blast. It has been a good day!"

"I think all of us are going to get along just fine." Said Andy happily.

"If I don't *cough* make any you sick." Said Spider groggily.

"Don't worry me heartie; I have strong immune systems." Smiled Barney. "Now let us set sail for the Island of dreams. Yo ho!"

And with that Barney lay back and tipped his pirate hat over his eyes.

"Night guys; may tomorrow be a day of victory and space aliens." Said Andy before closing his eyes.

Jimmy leaned out of hid bunk and looked at Spider.

"So Spider … do you like arachnids?"

"Heh, I've *cough* heard that before." Chuckled the sick kid with a small smile. "They're ok … *cough* … but it's just a name."

"It's kinda unusual." Said Jimmy.

"There are other people *choke* with the name." Said Spider with a sneeze. "Like Spider Robinson, a science fiction writer."

"That's really cool." Exclaimed Jimmy. "Goodnight teamy; let's win tomorrow."

"We can *cough* only hope." Said Spider.

* * *

**Confessional- Achoo!**

**Spider: Jimmy seems *cough* pretty nice; I hope he isn't *sneeze* voted off for being young and not too strong. *gag* Oh boy, vomit coming!**

**Andy: I sure lucked out being on this team; all my bunk mates are cool! It's even cooler than when Armstrong landed on the moon back in July 20****th**** 1969 … a fine day indeed.**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle, girls)**

* * *

Eleanor got into her bed, pulled a blanket over her ferret cage and took her hat off for the first time that day. The other girls were in bed as well; Quana was on the other bottom bunk beside Eleanor, Nakia was above Eleanor and Zita was above Quana.

"What a fun day huh girls?" Asked Quana. "I won immunity and got placed on a hopefully great team!"

"As long as my hair says fine I don't mind the team." Said Nakia with a mask over her eyes.

"Is hair all you think about?" Asked Quana with a raised eyebrow.

"It's beautiful; just like me." Smiled Nakia to herself. "And besides; it's made me very popular at school."

"Oh I can tell." Said Quana sarcastically.

"I knew you'd agree with me." Said Nakia thankfully and also completely oblivious to the sarcasm.

"It was sarcasm." Said Quana as she settled down.

"The challenge was pretty hard." Said Eleanor. "If not for Jimmy then me, Oscar and Xaria wouldn't have finished at all."

"How did he help?" Asked Nakia. "His hair can't have been any use."

"I repeat my last statement, is hair all you think about." Said Quana.

"Anyway." Interrupted Eleanor. "He crawled through a small vent and opened the door from the other side. Maybe his small size will be pretty useful."

"I wonder who is the richest contestant here." Said Zita from her bunk. "They'd have some good jewelry that would fetch a pretty penny on the open market."

"I'm guessing you like stealing right?" Asked Nakia.

"For years; I guess I inherited the trait from my second uncle Billmon; he was a famous cat burger, too bad he got caught."

"Serves him right." Said Nakia. "Stealing is wrong; it gets you nowhere in life … quite unlike my hair."

Quana sighed; she and Nakia were DEFINETELY not going to get along.

* * *

**Confessional- I have nice hair too!**

**Quana: Nakia is like a few girls back home I really don't like; they judge people by appearance and obsess over frivolous things like hair and make up. I hope she doesn't try to become leader … but by saying that I've probably jinxed it.**

**Nakia: I wonder if I'd be a good leader? I bet my hair would say I am!**

* * *

**(Team Grenade boys)**

* * *

"Ok guys; here's how it works." Said Kasimar gruffly as he climbed up to a top bunk. "If you touch my stuff then nobody will find the body, kapeesh?"

"Y-y-y-yes sir!" Whimpered Carlton as he climbed into a bottom bunk.

"Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he got into the bunk under Kasimar. "Evil laughter before bed is always the best way to get an evil night of sleep."

"I'm scared of evil." Whimpered Carlton. "It's so horrible."

"Is there anything you're not scared of?" Asked Oscar as he got into the bunk above Carlton.

"Yes … vanilla cake." Said Carlton weakly.

"Well douche nozzles; I'm gonna get some sleep; hope you all have nightmares." Laughed Kasimar as he leaned back.

"How did I end up on this team of weirdo's?" Asked Oscar. "I'm the only sane guy here; a wannabe villain, a bully and a wimp … this is absolutely dreadful, we're going to lose, hands down."

"Well I ain't gonna be voted off." Said Kasimar. "Takes more than a quartet of girls to get rid of me."

"I'm scared of girls." Trembled Carlton.

"What a coward; you're a little crybaby! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace.

"This is gonna be a long night." Sighed Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional- Long as a country mile…**

**Oscar: **(Looking sleepy). **I didn't get much sleep last night; Wallace kept laughing in his sleep and Carlton woke up screaming twice. **(sighs). **Did you notice how Wallace sounds like the collector in littlebigplanet when he laughs?**

**Kasimar: Wallace is kind annoying … scratch that; VERY annoying, but he has some seriously evil ideas that even surprise me! I think he'll be a fine bad guy one day … but he'll have to settle for second place because I'm winning NO matter what, got it? **(Holds up a fist to the camera).

* * *

**(Team Grenade, Girls)**

* * *

Lavender sat in her bed and looked at the other girls on her team; Xaria was lying in bed staring at the underneath of the top bunk, Mable was above her taking out the bobble that kept her hair in a ponytail; her hair was let down and went downwards to her back as she lay on her bed. Raven was on the remaining top bunk silently and looking away from the others.

"So girls … looks like we're all bunking together." Said Lavender in an attempt to start conversation.

"Obviously." Said Xaria, "Why else would we be sleeping in the same room?"

"I know; it was a rhetorical question." Said Lavender. "But anyway; why don't we get to know each other? Like … why did you guys join the show?"

"Well; as you know, I like healthy eating, hence my figure." Said Mable. "I joined to spread the message of healthy eating so there will be less people like Owen. Also I want to win. What about you Xaria?"

"Simple; I joined because I wanted to win; I'm no loser like those two who just got voted off, I also want my own show where I can state my views on things I dislike such as the price of car petrol." Said Xaria. "So why did you join Lavender?"

"Because I was sick of everyone thinking cheerleaders are dumb and brainless; I get A's and B plusses and people still think I'm a brainless buxum! I'm gonna prove them wrong and win this thing without backstabbing anyone." Said Lavender.

"Think you can do it?" Asked Mable.

"I know I can; if I can get an A in algebra then winning a reality show won't be too hard. So, why did you join Raven?"

Raven looked up in surprise; she hadn't been expected anyone to talk to her.

"W-well I j-j-joined to b-become less s-s-shy." Said Raven quietly.

"We can all see that's working." Said Xaria with a roll of her eyes; Mable silenced her by tossing a spare hair bobble at her.

"Well there's no need to be shy; two thirds of us are completely nice."

"I'm guessing I'm the other third." Said Xaria.

"You wouldn't be if you didn't complain so much." Said Lavender. "But if it makes you less grouchy I apologize for calling you bumble bee."

"You don't mean that." Grumbled Xaria.

"I do; I only said it because you called me a brainless cheerleader; the stereotype I'm going to prove wrong."

"…Fair enough." Said Xaria as she turned to the wall and closed her eyes.

"G-g-goodnight girls." Said Raven.

"G'night." Said Mable and Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional**

**Lavender: Xaria has quite a negative attitude … I wonder why that is? Maybe I should just show her some niceness … she could be a really useful teammate.**

**Raven: I can't h-help being s-s-shy; I just d-don't like p-publicity too m-much."**

**Xaria: Well … cheerleader, no, Lavender … she apologized her calling me bumble bee. That's ok … but still, I'm not going to be her BFF; I'm not Katie or Sadie, period! And besides; I'm a loner; I work best left to my own devices…**

* * *

**(Team Jungle, Boys)**

* * *

Gary, Hector and Vinnie were in their cabin; there had been a discussion on who should get the single bed and it was decided that as Hector was the, ahem, 'biggest', that he should get it. Currently they were in bed with Gary on the top bunk and Vinnie on the bottom.

"What a day." Said Vinnie as he lay in bed. "I not only made some friends and survived the first elimination but I found someone who I really do not like."

"Me too; good thing she was voted off right?"

"Well, Daisy was pretty mean but I meant Fifi, something about her isn't right … and she holds a grudge against me since I'm a guy. I hope she doesn't last too long … but knowing Total Drama … she will." Said Vinnie with a sigh.

"I do find the attitude of the pink haired one rather … unsettling." Said Hector. "She has a personal vendetta on guys even though we personally have done nothing to her … it is odd."

"Well; let's think of it this way." Said Gary. "Pink hair … and that Afro? I'd go and see I physiatrist if I were you."

The others laughed heartily.

* * *

**Confessional**

**Gary: I may not look itbut I do have a pretty good sense of humor.**

"Shall we get some sleep?" Asked Hector. "They'll be a challenge tomorrow and it could strain our wisdom, constitution or strength and we need to be rested in all departments."

"Goodnight guys." Said Vinnie as he removed his Russian hat revealing curly flaming red hair.

"Why do you where that hat if you aren't Russian?" Asked Gary.

* * *

"My last name is Kapustin; my family originated is Russia, I have some relatives there and when they heard of my 'accident' then they sent me the hat as a get well present. They hand crafted it and I value it very much … I hope Zita doesn't steal it."

* * *

**Confessional- No you're a hat!**

**Vinnie: If anyone stole my hate I wouldn't hesitate to get it back with pinchy.** (He raises his metal arm)

* * *

"How did you lose your arm?" Asked Gary. "Did it hurt?"

"Well I blacked out when it happened so I felt no pain … but I don't want to talk about it. Goodnight." Said Vinnie as he turned over.

"I'm looking forward to tomorrow." Said Gary. "Chef said I get to cook the team's meals so we'll have an advantage over the opposition. Goodnight Hector."

"Have a pleasant energy regenerating slumber." Said Hector.

* * *

**Confessional- Metal arm and plastic leg! Not that anyone has the latter…**

**Vinnie: I think me and the other guys are going to get along quite well. As for the girls? Uzuri's kinda creepy but I don't think she actually realizes how scary what she says actually is … she's got nice hair though. Fifi I don't like, I'm not sure about Irene and Yessica … but Tabitha seems alright, she could be a very strong leader. I hope so anyway.**

**Gary: I wonder what the team would prefer for breakfast … spare ribs in sweet and sour sauce with rice or chicken korma with a side of pepper and carrot salad. What do you think?**

**Hector: I wonder how Vinnie lost his arm? He'll possibly tell us when he feels ready but as he only met us today I wouldn't think he'd reveal it for a while. I had a good sleep; the bed was very comfy.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle girls)**

* * *

Tabitha sat on her bed and looked at the other four girls in the room with her; Uzuri was in bed with her emo doll, Fifi was in the single bed and had put up a feminist poster (bright pink no less), Irene was on a top bunk in her tree pajamas with a tree plushie of all things. Yessica was on the other top bunk and was lying down with her eyes closed. Tabitha wondered who would make the best ally. She'd have to find someone desperate, likable and strong minded.

"This is great." Said Fifi. "Just us girls bunking together and no guys to try anything funny on us."

"Fifi; I really don't think they would do that … well, maybe Kasimar and Wallace but nobody else." Said Yessica. "And why do you have such a problem with guys anyway?"

"Why? Why not? They've made us girls their slaves throughout history and there has never been a female president. One day we'll be dominant … one day." Said Fifi confidently.

"If you say so." Said Tabitha mildly. "So anyway; what do you girls think of the other contestants? Anyone you think we should be wary of if they make it to the merge."

* * *

**Confessional- Do you like pancakes? Yeah we like pancakes!**

**Tabitha: Key word being IF.**

* * *

"I'm not sure." Said Uzuri. "I think Oscar could be a powerful opponent with his muscles."

"He lacks the intelligence to back it up just like most guys." Said Fifi as she lay down on the pillow.

"Guys aren't so bad you know." Said Irene. "What about your dad?"

"Don't mention him." Snarled Fifi. "He left my mum as soon as she told him she was pregnant with me."

Everyone was silent … that was AWFUL.

"Is … is that why you hate guys?" Asked Yessica timidly.

"A little column A, a little column B." Said Fifi dismissively. "Now say no more; I'm going to a male free sleep."

Fifi turned over and pulled the covers over her head. Tabitha shrugged and turned to the others.

"So girls; roomies, ready to win tomorrow?" Asked Tabitha. "We're gonna dominate the competition!"

"I agree; don't you Little Miss Emo?"

Uzuri pulled the string on the doll and it began speaking.

"_Stab to the lung, stab to the heart, mix together and you've got a blood tart! Heheheheheh!_" Laughed the doll which seriously scared the others in the room.

**Confessional- Nightare fuel!**

**Yessica: That doll is gonna give me nightmares!**

"Err … Uzuri; do you think the things that doll says are appropriate?" Asked Irene in slight fear.

"Don't worry; it's not like its carnivorous or anything … or at least it shouldn't be … goodnight girls!"

Uzuri lay down to go to sleep as Tabitha looked at Yessica and Irene.

"Well; anyway, good job making it past the first day girls, and let me tell you … we aren't gonna end up like Fatso and Tattle tale!"

"Yeah!" Grinned Irene. "The others are gonna lose big time; as big as a redwood!"

"To victory we go!" Squeed Yessica.

"Shut up!" Yelled Fifi from under her covers. "I'm trying to get some sleep here!"

* * *

**Confessional- Will they win? **

**Tabitha: The girls on this team all look like followers, but I'll need a definite right hand girl. And also … when I said 'we' I meant 'me'. One way or another the million dollars will be mine. **

**Irene: Tabitha seems like a really independent and highly skilled leader; I'm sure we'll do good with her on the team. This contest will be AWSOME! Eeeeeei!**

* * *

The next morning the twenty four campers were sleeping mostly peacefully and there was not a sound in the area … but a certain sadistic host was aiming to change that.

Chris took out an air horn attached to a megaphone; immediately he put another megaphone in front of that and pressed the button. The resulting sound could be heard all over the island and woke all the campers up instantly, some even fell out of bed.

Lavender stormed out of the cabin fully dressed and over to Chris; she grabbed the air horn and threw it to the ground and then stamped on it. She finally spat on it and growled at Chris.

"Did you REALLY need to wake us up like that?" She asked angrily but calmly.

"Yes, yes I did." Smiled Chris looking not sorry at all.

The other twenty three campers trudged out dressed in their normal cloths and stood around Chris; some looked very displeased such as Kasimar and Xaria; on the other hand Jimmy and Barney looked really excited. And Spider just looked sick.

"Good morning not as handsome as me campers." Said Chris rudely. "Your challenge doesn't start for another hour so you are free to do what you want until then."

There was silence which was broken by a growling; it was Xaria.

"Chris you jackass! If the challenge doesn't start yet then why did you wake us up? I need my sleep!" Snarled Xaria.

"Simple; because I felt like it! Hahaha!" Laughed Chris. "So; to the mess hall with you all; it's time for brekkie."

The campers collectively sighed and walked to the mess hall for another dose of disgusting food. Some campers felt the urge to kick Chris in the balls but knew he would eliminate them if he did.

* * *

**Confessional- Kick him in the crotch Unca Scrooge!**

**Lavender: (**With bags under her eyes). **I am not a morning person; I need two cups of coffee to wake up fully. Watching last season made me dislike Chris … being in his company makes me hate him even more.**

**Jimmy: I love mornings; they're when the birds sing and the sun rises through the trees and shines its light on our world. Yep; I'm a morning person.**

**Spider: Chef's food is ***cough*** really bad; it makes me ***gag*** queasy just thinking about it!**

As the campers entered the mess hall they noticed three tables had been set up; each had one of the three team's respective icons on it. It seemed that the team tables had been set up. Chef Hatchet stood by the kitchen and glared at all the campers.

"Alright maggots, each team gets one table. Come and get your food and then sit down!" Bellowed Chef Hatchet.

Everyone lined up and received plates and bowls 'food' that looked vile. Team Puzzle and Team Grenade sat down and began force feeding themselves while Team Jungle got to the front of the line.

"You guys are the lucky team." Said Chef Hatchet.

"Why." Asked Raven uncertainly.

"Because I'm not cooking for you."

"Then who is?" Asked Vinnie in great relief.

"That would be me." Said Gary as he walked to the front of the kitchen and handed Vinnie a plate of waffles with honey and orange juice.

"Mondo!" Cheered Vinnie. "Wait … you're cooking for us?"

"Me and Chef negotiated a deal." Said Gary. "I get to cook for the team if I teach him how to cook. It's win-win."

"Yay! This is more fun than a marathon of SAW!" Whooped Uzuri.

"You watch that crazy stuff?" Asked Irene in shock.

"I don't like some of the gore too much … but the plot is O-M-G." Explained Uzuri as Gary handed her some spare ribs in sweet and sour sauce. "Thanks Gary."

"No problem team mate." Smiled the young Chef as he passed Hector a plate of toffee smothered pancakes and milk.

By now the other two teams had noticed Gary giving his team very good and actually edible food. They were quite jealous.

"Are you gonna share those pancakes?" Asked Mable.

"I'm very sorry but I'm only allowed to cook for my team." Explained Gary apologetically. "If I'm still here at the merge I'll cook for everyone."

"You're such a git!" Snarled Kasimar. "I don't mind Chef's food but I LOVE pancakes; we can do this the easy way or the hard way!"

"Probably not as hard as your thick skull." Responded Gary as he gave Irene some special K flakes.

Everyone laughed and Kasimar drew a line across his throat with his finger and snarled.

* * *

**Confessional- As skully as Skulldugery!**

* * *

**Tabitha: I usually don't care for humor but that was pretty funny! I should make sure Gary stays around for a time.**

Breakfast went by without further death threats and the teams began to talk amongst themselves.

"So guys." Said Nakia as she stroked her smooth hair. "What do you think today's challenge will be?"

"Hopefully nothing involving bungeeing into a volcano." Said Eleanor as she took a bite of her burnt toast which made her gag.

"Owing to the fact Chris is a phicot … phych … is crazy." Said Jimmy. "I'd say something painful … and I have a low body tolerance for pain."

"Maybe he'll *cough* give us fifty lashes." Groaned Spider.

"I don't want bushy eyebrows." Whimpered Jimmy, clearly misunderstanding the meaning of the sentence.

"Come on land lubbers; where's your sense of adventure maties?" Asked Barney who actually looked quite cheerful and hyper. "We'll be the captains of the ship of Wawanakwa and make our adversaries walk the plank. I feel confident yet determined that we won't lose at whatever the challenge is."

"I wish we all had your optimism Barney." Said Andy who was sitting next to Barney and eating lumpy porridge.

"Comes from an overdose of pirate movies, sea shanties and Celebrity Deathmatch; jolly good show it was."

"What's Celebrity Deathmatch?" Asked Jimmy curiously.

"It's." Began Barney before Quana cut him off.

"It's an adult show you probably wouldn't like." She said quickly and actually somewhat truthfully.

"If you say so." Said Jimmy as he ate a spoonful of soft cornflakes.

"This place is a gold mine for stealing." Said Zita from the end of the table. She shoved a handful of silverware into her loot sack. "I think I can estimate these knives and forks at six bucks each due to quality and build."

"Err, yeah, right." Said Andy with a sigh.

* * *

**Confessional- This will be quite a puzzle.**

**Andy: Barney and I are best buds, but Zita … I think her stealing could be a problem for us. I'm not too fond of Nakia; too much hair and too little brains. But I'll see how he goes. I hope we don't become the losing team.**

**Quana: That was close; I've seen Celebrity Deathmatch; it's full of violence and gore … it is funny from time to time I admit … but Jimmy shouldn't be exposed to it yet. Barney seems nice but he is a little … 'out there'.**

* * *

Team Grenade was already in conversation ... but then again, as it was Kasimar who was talking they weren't really enjoying it.

"So then I twisted his arm behind his back and punched him into the mud; it was a tough fight … for him! But he was a good bit of practice; he was perhaps the strongest first grader I ever battled."

"Y-y-you beat up first graders?" Asked Carlton in fear.

"Well yeah; they generally have the most lunch money and I've got to make a profit somehow. The school yearbook rated me most likely to appear on TV as well, cool huh?"

"Most likely to appear on TV behind bars; yep that's true." Snapped Lavender.

"Shut it ginger." Snarled Kasimar.

"If you don't shut it we'll vote you off." Said Mable as she gagged on a blue piece of celery.

"But I'm your strongest player; the one with the muscle and fearlessness; you need me to win challenges." Pointed out Kasimar.

"I'm all that you are besides evil." Said Oscar as he lifted up dumbbell up and down in one hand and ate porridge on a spoon with the other.

"What's so bad about evil?" Asked Wallace indignantly. "The greatest people are evil like Red Dragons, Jafar, Mr. Burns and Devious Diesel!"

"You actually watch Thomas the tank engine? Hahaha!" Laughed Lavender.

"We were all kids once ass butt!" Snapped Wallace.

"Can't w-w-we just g-get along?" Asked Raven hopefully.

"I wouldn't bet on it girl." Grumbled Xaria as she pushed her empty plate away from her. "This place is like the Texas refinery of arguing; just let it be; this problem will sort itself out. Or they could kill each other … but that's not my business."

"I can tell we're gonna get along just fine." Said Mable sarcastically. "I bet we'll be the losing team."

"Don't bet on it." Said Lavender. "Maybe we'll rise from the shadows like the sun rises through the trees."

"Or we could lose." Said Xaria flatly.

"…Oh whatever!" Said Lavender as she slammed her head onto the table.

* * *

**Confessional- Grenades go boom!**

**Lavender: The one and only advantage of us losing is that we can vote off Kasimar; he's such a jerk! And beating up a first grader? That's not right!**

**Wallace: All the good villains have secrets! Like Bowser rights sappy things in his diary about peach! And diaries are for girls anyway; funny huh?**

* * *

Team Jungle were having a better breakfast; they had decent food and no psycho's in their group. Uzuri sat her emo doll on the seat next to her as she ate her spare ribs which were really delicious. Tabitha watched her team and smirked.

"_Before long I'll have them eating out of the palm of my hand_." She thought evilly.

"Hey Tabitha; ready to kick the other teams butts?" Asked Irene excitedly.

"I sure am tree girl." Said Tabitha with a nod. "We'll show them the power that is us. We have all the best players. And if there is a cooking challenge we have guaranteed victory thanks to Gary."

"I agree … and tree girl huh? Not a bad nickname." Smiled Irene as she forked and ate some spotted bacon while nearly choking.

"We're lucky to have Gary; no prison food for us." Said Vinnie happily as he ate his waffles. "This is great huh guys?"

"You could say that again Vinnie; I'm sure that with a decent meal we'll win with no problem." Said Yessica. "But if we lose … who would you vote off?"

"I'll give you three guesses." Said Vinnie as he mouthed the word 'pink'.

"Oh; her." Said Yessica as she went back to her food.

"I think we stand the most chance of winning." Said Fifi as she took a bite of her toast. "We have a majority of girls."

"You do realize that saying sexist jargon like that could lead to your downfall right?" Asked Hector. "Both genders are equal to every last detail … but not to the point of physical identicality."

"You just keep telling yourself that." Said Fifi smugly.

"I wonder how Gary is doing teaching chef." Asked Uzuri. "It's probably gonna be more frustrating than catching Jack the Ripper."

* * *

**Confessional- In the jungle, the creepy jungle.**

**Vinnie: I wonder what goes on in Uzuri's mind. I hope I never find out … but then again she could have talents as a team mate.**

**Uzuri: My team has so many cool people on it; Hector is smart, Gary's a great Chef, Tabitha is an awesome person and Vinnie is really cool. I'm not sure about the others but I just need to get to know them … if they don't run away first. Teehee!**

* * *

In the kitchen Gary was teaching Chef to cook; owing to the fact that Chef Hatchet could burn cereal they were starting with something easy … soup.

"Ok Chef, now that we've removed the soup from the heat we have to drizzle in the beaten egg and vigorously stir the soup as we do so."

Gary demonstrated this and once finished he put the bowl of chicken and sweet corn soup on a plate and opened the silverware drawer.

"Oh Chef; now for something easy; which type of cutlery do we use for soup.

"This." Said Chef confidently as he took out a cleaver.

"Chef that's a cleaver." Said Gary blankly.

"Yes." Said Chef clearly not catching on.

"That's not correct; we need a spoon." Said Gary as he picked up a spoon.

"Are you telling me what to do in my kitchen?" Growled Chef before starting to sob. "I'll never be a master chef! Waaaaah!"

Chef slammed his head onto the counter and began bawling. Gary blinked and then sighed.

"This is more frustrating than when I tried to become a bus driver." Said Gary with annoyance. He pulled up a chair and began to eat his soup.

"At least the soup is great." He sighed as he swallowed a spoonful.

* * *

**Confessional- What a baby.**

**Gary: This is going to take a while; I can see why last years catering teacher had a nervous breakdown when another student set fire to their lobster and got electrocuted by the microwave.**

**Chef: (Still crying). Boo hoo!**

* * *

A while later the teams had all finished breakfast which was for all but one team … pretty disgusting. Seriously, where did Chef learn too cook? Chris stood on a crate at the front of the mess hall so all the campers could see him. Chris loved attention; he also loved his voice and pretty face ... but who cares? Chris cleared his throat and began to speak.

"Good morning campers! I hope you had a good breakfast."

"We did thanks to Gary." Cheered Uzuri.

"Really? Well; ok, if the other teams get all hissy and make a scene it'll be good for ratings. Anyway; it is time for your second challenge. And this one isn't too bad as we're only just beginning."

"Have you grown a conscious Chris?" Asked Mable. "I never would have expected it."

"I just want to see how you all interact without threat of injury; a fight could break out. But back to the point. You all know what a theme song is right?"

"How could we not?" Asked Eleanor. "We all have television sets."

"Good; at least I don't have to explain that. For today's challenge you will be making a theme song representing everyone in your team. We have equipment outside the mess hall; it's the same for everyone. I will be judging the theme songs and the losers will be sending someone home."

"What about the other two teams?" Asked Hector. "I assume the first place team will get something special right?"

"Indeed they will Hector; they shall get a special prize which shall be revealed after the challenge. The middle team wins nothing but is also safe. Now move out everyone; you have until six this afternoon … and your time starts now!"

Everyone got up and ran out the mess hall door to began the challenge as Chris turned to the camera man.

"The teams know there challenge and what to do … but who will lose? Who will be the next to walk the dock of shame? Find out when we return on Total Drama Letterz!"

"And cut!" Said the Camera man.

"Finally; I have three hairs out of place, THREE! And someone bring me my latté!"

* * *

**Confessional- Why don't I get a themesong?**

**Kasimar: I think my theme song would be hardcore rock! Better run for your life becauaes Kasimar is full of strife! Heh, heh, Victory is is the bag.**

**Spider: **(Is sick in the toilet). **Maybe tis won't be such a** *cough*** hard challenge; I'm** *cough*** pretty good at music; I can even play the flute! I hope I ***splutter*** don't get a stroke though.**

**Nakia: My hair shall be the highlight of the song. ...Eww! There's vomit on the seat!**

* * *

* * *

**And that's the end of the first part of day 2. What will happen next? nothing good knowing Total Drama. **

**Next time ... the challenge continues and some problems arise. Chris announces a winner and someone walks the dock of shame. Nut who? Find out next time!**


	4. Day 2 Part 2, We be making a theme song

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island or any of it's characters or substequent seasons. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I do however own all twenty six of the contestants in this story. And while I'm at it the alphabet theme isn't mine either, it belongs to Frank15. Check out his stories; they are really most excellent.

**The Warning:** This story containd Bullying, over the top feminism, a little love, some really bad people, bad language, crying adults and other stuff. You have been warned though it's nothing M rated.

**Pairings:** Still not telling but you'll find out eventually.

**Note:** This chapter was fun to write; thirty pages of microsoft word. A camper is eliminated in this chapter. Read to find out who.

Fasten your seatbelts!

* * *

"And welcome back to the greatest show in the universe; Total Drama Letterz!" Said Chris from his crate platform in the canteen.

"We didn't go anywhere Chris; the camera's cut for ten seconds and you asked for a latté; then you spoke just now. It doesn't make sense."

"Why don't you just go and cry again you baby!" Snapped Chris meanly while flipping Chef the bird.

"Well maybe I will!" Wailed Chef as he ran into the kitchen with tears running down his face.

"Anyway; when we left off the campers had ran outside to start the challenge. The challenge, as you may recall, is to make a theme song for their team and its members. Will anybody screw up? I seriously think so! Enjoy the second half of the show and don't forget to think how beautiful I am!"

* * *

**(Team Puzzle)**

Team Puzzle was setting their equipment up by the beach; they wanted some good scenery for extra points. And those extra points could mean the difference between winning and losing. Zita set up the camera and aimed it pointing out at the seas so there would be an ideal background.

"Hey guys; is this how you want the camera?" Asked Zita.

"It is Zita; that'll do." Said Andy. "And what about the lighting? Do we really need it because it's fairly sunny at the moment and it would waste electricity.

"Good point; I think that we'll give it a miss." Said Quana as she tweaked the settings on her microphone. "We're also going to need to edit this after we're done; does anybody know how to do that?"

Spider quickly raised his hand.

"I do; I'm *cough* pretty good with *cough* computers." Sniffled Spider.

"Excellent; you can be in charge of editing, if you want that is." Said Quana.

"Thanks." Smiled Spider as he opened a case in the pile of equipment and found a laptop. "I think *cough* we'll be editing with *gag* this."

"Wait a second." Said Nakia as she placed their team's flag in the sand. "Who made you in charge?"

"Well; I just wanted to help; do you have a preference?" Asked Quana.

"Indeed I do; I want to be in charge." Said Nakia. "I have the hair and beauty for it."

"It takes more than looks to lead you know." Said Quana as she inspected the camera Zita had placed and gave Zita the thumbs up. "Do you know anything about film making or singing?"

"Why should I? I'm pretty and popular; that's all that matters." Said Nakia with a sneer.

"I'm popular as well but I'm more likely the better person as I judge people by how they treat me rather than their hair." Retorted Quana.

Jimmy was making a sand castle to serve as a stationary prop for the movie and saw the two girls arguing. As he was never one to like fights he quickly got between them.

"Come on girls; we're on the same team here. Don't fight!" He said nicely. "We need to put aside our differences and go for gold!"

"You're right Jimmy." Said Quana. "We should all get along or we might have to vote someone off. How's the sand castle coming along?"

"Very well; I just need some shells to decorate it."

"Why don't you bring Spider and Eleanor along with you?" Suggested Nakia. "They'll help you get the job done faster."

* * *

**Confessional- Why not bring me along?"**

**Nakia: Truth is I wanted those three gone because they're annoying and their hair … ouch! Totally ugly!**

* * *

"Good idea." Said Jimmy with a smile. "Hey Spider, Eleanor! Want to help me look for shells?"

"Sure thing little *gag* buddy." Said Spider with a nod.

"Of course; I love the beach and all the interesting shells you can find on it." Said Eleanor. "I'd like to find a pearl but I doubt we'll find any."

"Many we will find one, you never know." Said Jimmy. "Now let's get those shells!"

Jimmy ran off down the beach with Eleanor and Spider following close behind.

"Where are Andy and Barney?" Asked Zita.

"Barney said they were going to make a project for our video."

"Which is now done!" Said Barney as he and Andy walked into the set.

"So; what did you make oh bad haired one?" Asked Nakia.

"Well overly pompous vain one; we made a model of our teams logo yaaar!" Said Barney with a smile.

Barney held out a puzzle piece made from orange rock that looked exactly like the one on their flag. He must have carved it; that was probably why he had been gone for an hour … and what craftsmanship!

"You made this by yourself Barney?" Asked Zita with interest.

"Well I helped." Said Andy. "We broke about seven rocks before finding one that was suitable. Where are Jimmy, Eleanor and Spider?"

"They just went to look for sea shells for the sand castle." Said Nakia. "But now we're gonna have to think of some lyrics for the song."

"…How about something like 'Spider is green and he's on the scene like a flu pill riding a blood stream?" Suggested Barney.

"Barney that's genius!" Said Quana in amazement. "Have you written songs before?"

"Only sea shanties matey." Replied Barney as he laid down the puzzle stone on the center of the stage area.

"Ok; the lightings ditched, the camera is ready, shell collecting has started and we've got a cool hand made logo." Listed Quana on her fingers. "I think we've got a good chance at this!"

"I sure hope so; I don't want to be out this early! People won't see my hair in action!" Whined Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional- I may be bald but I'm still hot!**

**Nakia: I'm sure I'll do very well … but an early loss would be humiliating! But it won't happen … good thing too.**

**Barney: I learned how to carve stone at the boy scouts a few years back. I'm not just a pirate … I'm a stone carving sea dog!**

**Quana: Nakia … what is there to say? I know some girls really like their hair but Nakia takes it up to eleven and beyond. Does she even care about anything else? (Shakes head with a sigh). She's a weird one alright.**

* * *

**(Team Grenade)**

Team Grenade had chosen to make their film in the campgrounds; simple and reliable was clearly an idea for them. They had set up their equipment and were deciding what they should do next.

"Ok everyone; does anybody have an idea for lyrics?" Asked Lavender as she held a clipboard and paper.

"Well ginger; I'd like my lyrics to be something like 'He kicks when they scream, he punches when they dream, better run for your life, Kasimar's gonna cause some strife'. Something like that." Said Kasimar while he read a car magazine.

"I guess that's ok; it suits you anyway." Said Lavender. "Any other input?"

"Can the music be cuddly and soft?" Asked Carlton timidly. "I don't like loud noises and rock and roll."

"Grow a pair wimp." Said Wallace in annoyance. "Seriously; you're a coward!"

"Leave him alone; at least he isn't a complete poser!" Shot Mable.

"What! You take that back hippie!" Snarled Wallace

"GUYS!" Yelled Lavender to interrupt the inevitable brawl. "Why don't we try to get along for a while. Now, how about we work on some lyrics while Kasimar and Wallace go and look for some props?"

"Sure; I'm positive I could do some evil things while I'm at it." Said Wallace with a snicker of malice. "Come by right hand man; let us cause some mayhem!"

"Right on!" Agreed Kasimar as he followed the short bad guy to the beach.

When they were out of earshot Lavender let out a sigh of relief.

"Finally; I thought they'd never leave." Said Lavender happily.

"Shall we get to work?" Asked Oscar. "I'll help with any heavy lifting."

"Well if it's ok I think that the big log would look good in front of the mess hall." Said Mable.

"No problem." Said Oscar as he gripped it in both hands and dragged the heavy wooden log over to its destination.

"So what do you guys think the lyrics should be?" Asked Carlton.

"They'll be different for everyone … what do you want yours to be?" Asked Lavender.

"I'd like something like 'he loves soft and cuddly, with his teddy he gets huggly'; is that ok?" Asked Carlton.

"It's a bit soft don't you think?" Asked Mable.

"Just how I like it." Said Carlton.

"What about you Raven?" Asked Lavender.

"W-well I'm n-not s-sure; maybe something that c-c-captures my p-p-personality."

"Something that stutters then." Said Xaria with an eye roll. "Or maybe just a line or two as you don't really say much."

"Ok; what would your theme song be?" Asked Mable hotly.

"Easy; something dark and mysterious, just like me. Maybe it could have an Onyx or few. I take mystery up to twelve." Said Xaria calmly.

"I think you mean up to eleven." Said Lavender with a giggle.

"That too; I'm not too good with the television slang idioms." Said Xaria.

"Does that explain why you said Chris was a Deadpan Snarker for being too cheap to buy light bulb yesterday?" Asked Oscar as he returned. "I thought that didn't make much sense."

"Yeah; that's the reason. Now lets get to work, I'm not being voted off this early. I'm here to win, not to fail." Said Xaria as she picked up the camera.

"Shall we g-get filming everyone?" Asked Raven shyly.

"Let's do this!" Said Oscar as he pumped his fist up.

* * *

**Confessional- If you wanted tongs why didn't you just ask?**

**Oscar: Thanks to Lavender getting rid of winkus and dinkus, AKA Wallace and Kasimar, we got a fair bit of work done. I feel confident we'll escape elimination today.**

**Carlton: I don't like being on camera; it's scary … and it's a real fear; I believe its called stage fright. I'm a living stage fright. I'm just glad Lavender go rid of Wallace and Kasimar before they could cause any trouble.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle)**

The third team; the one that had the best breakfast, was already working on their movie … but they did have a few problems. Fifi was arguing with Vinnie about something stupid; she was accusing him of using her toothbrush.

"You little rat!" Snarled Fifi angrily. "You used my toothbrush!"

"Why would I? I've got my own and I don't like pink too much. For crying out loud I didn't use your toothbrush!"

"You did! It's all wet!" Pointed out Fifi.

"Well I didn't!" Said Vinnie truthfully.

"So you're saying I should believe a man?" Glared Fifi dangerously.

"Guys!" Said Tabitha calmly. "It's just a toothbrush; just use one of your others or wash it later. It doesn't matter! Let's just stop acting like crazy people escaped from an asylum!"

* * *

**Confessional- Two way street**

**Tabitha: I had to get them to stop arguing or we'd lose; and quite frankly I don't fancy going to a bonfire ceremony this early. (Crosses arms). I can see a conflict rising; and I intend to end it somehow before it becomes a problem.**

* * *

"Fine; I'll let it go this time." Said Fifi with an upturned nose. "But I still don't like him."

"I don't think you like anyone." Said Uzuri. "You haven't made a single friend since you've arrived. And you keep saying mean things about guys and my emo doll."

Uzuri pulled the string on her doll.

"_Blood is a vampires beer; tasty! Heheheheheh!_" Laughed the doll while Fifi backed away in fear.

"Well I have nothing against the doll; it's just scary!" Said Fifi in fear. "Now how about you just put the doll down and we can get to work, p …p … please?"

"Well since you asked nicely why not?" Smiled Uzuri as she set her doll on a log and took the lense cap off the camera. "Ready everyone?"

"Ready." Said Gary. "So who are we doing first?"

"Well; how about me?" Asked Tabitha. "I've got some lyrics worked out already; I'll just need someone to give me a beat or a tune."

"I'll do that." Said Yessica as she picked a trumpet out of the equipment pile and began playing it quite well. Hector joined her with a banjo.

As they started playing Vinnie turned the camera on and Tabitha began singing her theme song.

_Leader of school and leader of team_

_Tabitha Barrington is on the scene_

_With blue lipstick and purple steaks_

_That girl could stay standing for weeks_

_She's such the interest of all the boys_

_She has to hire some trained decoys_

Tabitha finished singing and bowed. Yessica and Hector stopped playing as well. The rest of the team clapped at the impressive song.

"Good job Tabitha." Said Irene. "Where did you learn to sing like that?"

"It's just one of my talents; now how about we take a quick break and get a drink?"

Everyone agreed; as they left Tabitha called Uzuri over discreetly.

"Need anything Tabitha?"

"Yes; ok, Uzuri, I've found out something that you might want to hear … and it's pretty important." Said Tabitha gravely.

"What is it?" Asked Uzuri with concern.

"You know that Fifi doesn't like your doll right?" Said Tabitha. "Well; I've heard that at her earliest possible opportunity she's going to destroy it … all those years of memory's gone!"

"Oh no!" Wailed Uzuri. "What should I do?"

"Well; you're my friend, I think that if we end up losing we could team up and both vote for Fifi. I don't want my friend's prized possession destroyed."

"Really?" Smiled Uzuri.

"I swear truthfully." Said Tabitha with a false smile.

"Oh thank you Tabitha; you're definitely my best friend." Cheered Uzuri. "But just to be safe I'm not letting my doll out of my sight."

"I don't blame you." Said Tabitha. "Now let's take that well deserved break."

* * *

**Confessional- I like cyanide and mustard pie!**

**Tabitha: And the first act of manipulation is done. This way if we lose I can end the pointless conflict between Vinnie and Fifi … and let's face it; Vinnie is a more useful asset. His metal arm has got to be strong. Fifi on the other hand … meh. But just so it isn't suspicious I should maybe get a few votes for Vinnie. Either way it won't be me going home.**

**Uzuri: That was so nice of Tabitha to look out for me and my doll like that; she's like the friend I've never had … and come to think of it I've never really had any friends. Apparently I'm too weird and scary for their tastes.**

* * *

**(Wallace and Kasimar)**

Wallace was setting up a trap on the ground; it was a ten foot pit with leaves covering it. He wiped a sweat of his forehead caused by the digging. He finally placed a sign on the ground and a plate with a Easter egg on it.

"This plan is genius, it is magnificent, and it is pure evil! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace.

"This is stupid; who would be dumb enough to fall down the pit for an Easter egg when Easter is months away!" Asked Kasimar in disbelief.

"Isn't it obvious?" Asked Wallace. "Everyone loves chocolate! Nobody will be able to resist it! And once they walk over to it they will fall and break their legs! Mwahahahaha!"

"If you say so … but I have to say; this is the oldest trick in the book of evil; right on page one." Said Kasimar with an eye roll. "Why not at least put nails at the bottom of the pit? That way they'll be too injured to even call for help."

"That would be very unfair and bad sportsmanship." Said Wallace.

"You play by a code of honor? You're a friggin bad guy!" Yelled Kasimar in annoyance.

"But I need to let them try to get me back so that we can have an epic show down!"

"That … is retarded, but then again, you are an overly obsessed with evil bad guy … so whatever floats your evil boat I guess." Shrugged Kasimar Idly. "Now can we go and beat someone up, my fists are getting cranky!"

"Sure; why not? Let us go and destroy the opposition and dance the hokey pokey on their graves! Mwahahahaha!"

"What if someone falls in the trap? Will we go and drop rocks on them?" Asked Kasimar devilishly.

"Of course; we'll check back later … but for now; it's cheating time!" Said Wallace as he marched off to the beach with the cruel bully following.

* * *

**Confessional- Mwahahahaha! See? I can be evil too!**

**Kasimar: I think the pit idea was obvious; what with the sign saying 'free Easter egg', but then again we all know how good chocolate is so maybe someone will fall for it. But I'd like to give my fists some exercise. They're called screw (holds up right fist) and you! (Holds up left fist).**

**Wallace: That trap is fool proof! Fool proof I tell you! Mwahahahaha! But evil aside I learned the trap from the encyclopedia; there's a lot of interesting stuff in it. And all good villains know how to read.**

* * *

**(Jimmy, Eleanor and Spider)**

The trio was on the beach collecting shells and also watching the birds fly around above them. Eleanor really liked the Island; even though Chris was a sadistic sociopath he did pick out a nice place for the show.

Jimmy had taken his hat off and was using it as a bag to collect shells. The hat was very stretchy so it had plenty of room for any shells that they found. Without his hat all his hair was visible … and it was *messy*. It was wild, blond and untamed and went all the way down to the shoulders.

As Jimmy and Eleanor collected shells Spider coughed and spluttered a distance from them. He had started on of his coughing sessions and had backed off so he didn't infect anyone.

"Achoo! *cough* *cough* *HARD cough*." Spluttered Spider.

"Are you ok Spider?" Asked Eleanor in concern.

"*Cough*. I'll be fine; *cough*, I'm starting to stop now." Said Spider with a small smile.

"How long have you been sick like this?" Asked Eleanor.

"All my life; I've got *sneeze* white blood cell deficiency so I *sniffle* don't have very strong *cough* immune systems." Said Spider. "It's just as *cough* well that my parents are *cough* doctors."

"A good thing indeed." Said Jimmy. "Otherwise you'd be bedridden and covered in chicken pox."

"I've actually *cough* been in bed for a week *cough* straight one time." Admitted Spider.

"Hopefully you won't have to leave due to illness." Said Eleanor as she picked up a shiny conch. "That would be a real shame since the contest has just started."

"I hope not." Said Spider as he blew his nose on a tissue.

"So why did you guys decide to come to Wawanakwa?" Asked Jimmy politely.

"I came to see all the wonderful animals on the island." Said Eleanor. "Maybe if I'm lucky I'll see sasquatchinaquwa."

"Be careful what *cough* you wish for." Said Spider with a smile.

"So why did you want to audition Spider?" Asked Eleanor.

"I didn't; it was doctor's *sneeze* orders as he felt that Island *cough* air would be good for me. Coincidently my *gag* resulting audition was good enough and here *cough* I am. I don't think I'll *cough* get too far though being that *cough* I'm the sick kid."

"Don't put yourself down Spider; you never know what you'll accomplish until you try." Said Jimmy wisely. "And besides; we're here to have fun and win a prize!"

"So why did a little *splutter* guy like you audition?" Asked Spider.

"Me and my best friends from back home, Charles, Ted, Ricky and Pablo, heard of the new season and all wanted to be on. In the end we decided that only one of us should go so our parents wouldn't be worried sick. I drew the longest straw and my audition was picked." Explained Jimmy with a smile. "If I win I'll split the money five ways with me and my buds."

"How unselfish of you." Said Eleanor in admiration.

"I'm just that nice." Said Jimmy. "Now let's keep looking for shells; we might find a pearl."

They continued searching for shells while nearby covered by some bushes were the gruesome twosome; by that I mean Wallace and Kasimar. They were watching the three on the beach closely like a wildcat preparing to pounce.

"So; are we gonna beat the crap outta them or what?" Asked Kasimar.

"Soon my right hand man, soon." Said Wallace sinisterly. "We must first study their attack pattern and weaknesses to have the advantage in combat."

"Is life an RPG to you?" Asked Kasimar in annoyance.

"Possibly; and I'm the dark master! Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace though he was careful to not be too loud as his victims were nearby.

"Ok my comrade; on the count of four we strike." Whispered Wallace.

"The saying is count of three you douche nozzle!" Whispered Kasimar rudely.

"But four is the number of evil; therefore it is the best number. Now, one, two, three … three and a half." Said Wallace as he readied himself.

"Get on with it." Hissed Kasimar.

"FOUR!" Yelled Wallace and he and Kasimar jumped from there cover and ran towards the three team puzzle members.

"Oh no, it's Kasimar!" Said Jimmy in worry.

"He's a dick!" Said Spider in equal unease.

"It is time for the ultimate showdown; the one where evil will prevail! Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed a button on his remote. Instantly evil organ music played from nowhere.

"Where does the music keep coming from?" Asked Kasimar.

"I'm sorry but that's classified information." Said Wallace. "Now destroy them! Mwahahahaha!"

"With pleasure." Grinned Kasimar as he approached Spider.

"Run Spider." Yelled Jimmy in panic.

"I *cough*, oh boy; I'm gonna … *gag.*" Said Spider as he groaned in sickness.

Just as Kasimar reached Spider, the sick kid threw up right onto Kasimar's shirt.

"Arrrgh! Gross." Wailed the bully as he backed away.

"Oh my *cough* word; I'm sorry, I hope *cough* I didn't infect you." Said Spider apologetically.

"Get away you douche nozzle!" Roared Kasimar. "You ruined my shirt!"

"Allow me my henchman." Said Wallace as he bared his fists and strafed forward to Jimmy.

"Don't hurt me! I have a low tolerance to pain." Said Jimmy as he backed away. Wallace kept coming and ignored his victims fear.

Just as Wallace was in punching range Jimmy walked back into a small stone and tripped over; as he fell his right foot sailed up right into Wallace's crotch … HARD.

"…Mommy." Whimpered Wallace as his eyes bulged in pain behind his sunglasses.

"Jimmy seemed to be suppressing the urge to say something; he tried hard but felt he had to say it.

"Guess there's no nuts in THAT chocolate bar!" Said Jimmy. "I may not have kept my eye on the ball but I sure kept my foot on it!"

"Ok; plan B!" Said Wallace in a high pitched voice. "Grab the damsel and cheese it!"

Wallace hobbled over to Eleanor and prepared to grab her but he never stood a chance. Eleanor swerved to the side and jump kicked him over.

"Arrrgh! Alas, I have been defeated; may my memory live on and my villainous deeds be remembered. Ooooh; goodbye delightfully evil world!" Said Wallace in great pain.

"Stop spreading retard around and run!" Said Kasimar as he grabbed Wallace and dashed off. "You wretches ain't seen the last of me!"

Wallace and Kasimar ran into the trees and vanished from sight. The three victors looked at each other and blinked.

"What was that all about?" Asked Jimmy.

"Heck if I *cough* know." Said Spider.

"I think we have enough shells now." Said Eleanor. "We should go back to our team now."

Jimmy slung his shell filled hat over his shoulder as he, Spider and Eleanor began walking back to their team.

"Where did you learn to kick like that Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy with interest.

"Kung fu." Said Eleanor. "I do have other hobbies besides animals you know."

"I hope Kasimar isn't too *sneeze* angry I puked on him." Whimpered Spider. "If he *splutter* is then he'll kill me!"

"Maybe he will … and maybe he won't; bullies are quite unpredictable. I think it's good you did what you did Spider." Said Eleanor. "Otherwise he may have not run away."

"Hooray for Spider." Cheered Jimmy.

Spider just smiled modestly.

* * *

**Confessional- Why doesn't anyone cheer about me?**

**Wallace: They may have won the battle … but they haven't won the war! I'll get my revenge if it's the last thing I do! Mwahahahaha!" **

**Kasimar: (Vomit on his shirt). I may be tough but even I have things I find disgusting; I mean he puked on me! What a freak! Maybe I'll start smaller and work my way up just like the strongest people in the world do. Maybe that beanie hat kid could be a good start?**

**Jimmy: Why do I have a funny feeling something bad is going to happen sometime in the near future? **

**Eleanor: Wallace … he's a bit over dramatic don't you think? And his theme music? Where does it come from?**

* * *

**(Vinnie and Fifi)**

Vinnie wished he was someone else for a while. Why you may ask? It's quite simple; Fifi had been following him and was going on about how he was a creep, a sexist and a bully. What had he done? In his memory it all started by Fifi yelling at him in the maze for bumping into Yessica and Zita. Something had to be done…

"Furthermore that metal arm is dangerous; you could kill someone with it, not that I'd expect anything less of you. If I gave you half a chance you would rip my arm off! I should call you pinchy!"

Vinnie was trying to block her out; he didn't come to this Island to make enemies; he wanted to win and meet some interesting people. But Fifi had developed a grudge on him for no reason. He let out a sigh that Fifi heard.

"Are you bored of me speaking?" She asked with a glare.

"A little; I just don't want to be nagged so much."

"Well SORRY for stating the truth! Another dose of sexism!"

"How exactly is letting out a sigh sexism; seriously, how?" Asked Vinnie.

"Because you wouldn't sigh at a man;' you only do it too a women; well let me tell you that this isn't the eighteenth century!.=" Yelled Fifi angrily.

"Oh no." Said Vinnie in fear.

Vinnie stopped moving and froze to the spot. Ahead of them lying on a plate was an Easter egg; it was in a bright blue and orange wrapper.

"What? It's an Easter egg." Said Fifi flatly.

"Get it away from me!" Shivered Vinnie.

"You mean to tell me you're scared of Easter eggs? That's even more ridiculous than the moon being made of cheese!" Said Fifi in amusement.

Vinnie backed away and shivered with wide eyes.

"If it gets you to stop being such a coward I'll get rid of it." Sighed Fifi as she approached the Easter egg on the leaves.

As Fifi got close and reached down to pick up the chocolaty treat the leaves under here gave way and she fell downwards into a deep hole and landed with a thud.

"What the … GET ME OUTTA HERE!" Screamed Fifi in anger.

Vinnie walked over to the edge of the pit and looked down at Fifi.

"Err … are you ok?" Asked Vinnie.

"Do I look ok you stupid boy? Get me out of here!"

"Well; I would … but you've been so nasty to me and my friends since you've got here. I don't know if I really should help you after all that."

Fifi looked up at Vinnie in horror but Vinnie continued.

"However; I can see you need a helping hand and my parents raised me to help those in need. Wait here; I'll go get a vine."

* * *

**Confessional- Hole in one!**

**Vinnie: I dislike Fifi, no lie, but I wasn't going to leave her stuck down there. That wouldn't be right. And as for the Easter egg thing? It's to do with how I got my metal arm; I'll say no more.**

* * *

Vinnie rushed over to a nearby tree with a long vine hanging down from it; one hard tug on it told Vinnie that it was strong. He climbed quickly up the tree and snipped the top of the vine with his pincers on his metal arm. He then jumped down, grabbed the vine and ran back over to the hole.

"Here; grab on." Said Vinnie as he tossed down the vine while keeping hold of one end very tightly.

Fifi began to climb up it; thankfully she wasn't too heavy and within a minute she was out of the hole and back on her feet.

"No thanks necessary." Said Vinnie. "I just hope you'll remember this hopefully good deed."

Fifi was silent for a moment … and then she snarled at Vinnie.

"You little rat! You dug that hole to drop me down! Then you rescued me so you'd be the hero and I'd be the helpless damsel in distress! I thought you could go no lower! If we lose then you're off this island creep!" Spat Fifi in fury.

And with that Fifi stormed off with her fists balled as Vinnie stood there with his mouth open in shock.

"...She didn't even thank me!" He yelled in anger. "What did I do this time?"

* * *

**Confessional- So ungrateful.**

**Fifi: Vinnie is getting on my last nerve! He thinks he's so high and mighty with his strong metal limb! This team will be better off without him; metal arm and all, he's going down!**

**Vinnie: (Head in hands and looking annoyed). I give up! I help her out even when I could have just walked away and she still lashes out at me! I don't think there's any reasoning with her; my grand dad once said you can't get everyone to like you … I see what he means now. **(He sighs bitterly)

* * *

**(Team Puzzle)**

Andy had just finished writing the lyrics about himself; it wasn't easy but he thought they sounded pretty good. Barney had made his lyrics in the form of a sea shanty; it would certainly be interesting to hear.

"How are the lyrics coming along Andy?" Asked Quana.

"Very good indeed; I've just finished. But what should I do now? You're doing the singing and I can't do the music because I can't play an instrument. Any ideas?"

"How about you work the camera?" Suggested Quana. "We'll need a responsible individual to work it since SOMEONE is too busy brushing their HAIR!"

Quana said the last few words loudly to make sure Nakia heard them. Nakia was brushing her hair and just shrugged and looked away.

"You could be more of a help Nakia." Said Quana.

"I've already wrote my lyrics and it's time for my two hourly hair brush; what more could you expect?" Asked Nakia.

"Maybe a little effort." Said Quana. "You're not a very helpful team mate you know."

"I live by a philosophy; 'can't someone else do it', it works." Said Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional- Shutting up and working, it works.**

**Nakia: It sure does work; back home so many guys cater to my whims just for a feel of my amazing hair. And who am I to say no to being pampered and not having to do work? Life is good.**

* * *

Quana sighed and turned to Zita; she had gathered a pile of clams and was going through them to check for pearls. It goes without saying that so far she hadn't found any.

"Maybe be should get back to recording." Said Quana. "We don't want to lose in our team's first challenge."

"Just a second." Said Zita. "I've got just fifteen more clams to check for pearls."

"The chances of finding one are pretty unlikely." Said Quana. "Why not just steal the clams?"

"Because empty clams get no profit on the black market; a pearl would, that's why I've got to check them." Said Zita as she opened another clam. It was empty.

"We're back!" Called Jimmy as he, Eleanor and Spider walked up with many shells.

"Arrrrr! Good job me shell finding hearties." Said Barney with a thumbs up. "You be an honor to work with; a pirate crew could use skilled foragers like yourselves."

"Nice shells." Said Andy. "Since you only need a few for the castle you could spell puzzle with the left over's; right next to the stone puzzle piece."

"Good idea Andy; I'll get right o it." Said Jimmy as he kneeled down next to the puzzle carving and tipped the shells out of his hat. After putting his hat back on his head Jimmy began arranging the puzzle pieces to spell his team's name.

"So what took you so long?" Asked Andy.

"Winkus and Dinkus tried to attack us." Said Eleanor. "And by that I mean Wallace and Kasimar. Spider drove them off with his illness."

"I didn't mean to *cough* vomit on him." Said Spider shamefully. "I hope they aren't too *sneeze* angry."

"I wouldn't worry Spider." Said Quana kindly. "They're both jerks anyway. Just like a certain SOMEONE on this team."

Nakia sighed as she got up from the sand.

"Find; what do you want me to do for you oh so 'glorious leader'?" Asked Nakia sarcastically

"I'd appreciate it if you helped Jimmy with the shells; could you put a few on the sand castle?"

"Whatever you say." Said Nakia with a sigh as she began putting some shells on the large sand castle.

"Do you think we'll win?" Asked Eleanor to Quana. "I don't want to lose this early.

"Don't worry; I have a feeling we won't lose … and if we do I wouldn't vote you off. I have my sights on someone else." Said Quana reassuringly.

"Thanks." Said Eleanor. "Now let's win this challenge.

"Here, here, yo ho!" Agreed Barney.

* * *

**Confessional- The puzzle is nearly complete.**

**Jimmy: I don't think Quana and Nakia really like each other, I guess some people just don't see eye to eye. Nakia could help a bit more but maybe she was just feeling tired. When I get tired I'm less active.**

**Nakia: Hard work is not for me; it's for those who are lower class, not the cream of the crop like me and my hair.**

**Quana: Nakia sure is lazy; how does she get by in life? I wager it's her hair. At least she isn't a bully like Kasimar. **

**Spider: We managed to get Nakia ***cough*** to work with us one hundred percent ***cough*** eventually; Barney told her that ***sneeze*** hard work is good for your hair, she ***choke*** lapped it right up. Smart move Barney, ***sneeze*** smart move.**

* * *

**(Team Grenade)**

"Ok everyone" Said Lavender happily. "Great job; I think we're going to win with a video like this."

"We still need to do Wallace and Kasimar though." Said Mable. "I wonder when they'll be back."

"I think in a few seconds because here they come." Said Oscar. "And thus ends the peace."

Wallace and Kasimar walked up; Wallace looked a little injured and Kasimar had a vomit patch on his shirt.

"Don't … ask." Threatened Kasimar.

"Threatening us into silence; very dictator like." Grumbled Xaria.

"Oh shut up bumble bee!" Snapped Wallace.

Xaria growled and clenched her fists. Wallace just smirked.

"Now that you guys are here we can finish our video." Said Lavender. "We just need you to sing about yourselves in a few lines total."

"Can do; but I have to be able to laugh evilly." Said Wallace firmly.

"Sure; why not?" Said Lavender.

"What's with the vomit on your shirt?" Asked Carlton. "Vomit has germs and I'm scared of germs."

"WIMP!" Sneered Kasimar.

"Y-y-you're not very n-nice Kasimar." Said Raven quietly.

"Do I look nice?" Asked Kasimar with a glare. "I'm a chaotic evil sadist! There's no nice in me!"

"I don't doubt that." Muttered Mable.

"What's so bad about being evil?" Asked Wallace. "Being a villain ROCKS!"

"Right on Wallace; now if you'll excuse me for a moment I need to wash my shirt." Said Kasimar as he left to the wash rooms. "Later douche nozzles."

As Kasimar left Mable and Lavender sighed.

"It's gonna be a nightmare having him on the team." Said Mable. "He really is a monster."

"Oh quit whining; he's fine." Said Wallace. "But I'd think that since I'm a bad guy and proud of it"

"Just get singing your lyrics." Said Lavender with a sigh.

"I hope he doesn't sing badly." Said Carlton. "Because-."

"Let me guess; you're scared of bad singing?" Asked Mable.

"I was gonna say that I can't stand bad singing, it's an ear worm."

"Is that a parasite that goes in your ear and devours your ear drum or something?" Asked Xaria with a raised eyebrow.

"It means a song that gets stuck in your head and you can't get rid of the tune; they are really frustrating." Explained Lavender.

"I should buy a slang dictionary after the show ends." Pondered Xaria. "That way I won't mix up the sayings so much."

"I'm ready to sing girls; crank up the music … and make it evil! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically.

The others sighed as they picked their instruments and began to play.

* * *

**Confessional- No ear worms here; I have no ears!**

**Lavender: Wallace isn't too bad at singing but his manical laughter can get a little annoying after a while … why did I chose that particular chest yesterday?**

**Wallace: Mwahahahaha! It feels so good to let lose your inner evil; another advantage of being one of the bad guys … and unlike dick dastardly I intend to succeed at this competition.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle)**

Team Jungle had returned from their break and where making fast progress in their theme song. Tabitha seemed to be the leader as nobody had any complaints about her leading. At this moment in time they had just finished with Yessica's part of the theme song and it had gone pretty well.

"Good job Yessica." Said Irene. "That was really impressive."

"Thanks." Said Yessica with a smile. "I just hope it will be enough to secure us victory."

"I would think so; I think Team Grenade will lose; with Kasimar and Wallace on their team it'll be difficult for them to work together." Said Irene confidently.

At that moment Fifi stormed into the vicinity angrily with a look of venom on her face. It was actually pretty scary. Vinnie walked in behind her looking quite annoyed and exasperated.

"What happened?" Asked Hector.

"This filthy metal armed pig dug a hole and made me fall in it!" Cried Fifi in rage. "And then he 'rescues' me to look like a hero and make me look helpless!"

"Did you really?" Asked Yessica with a stern glare.

"I didn't!" Said Vinnie honestly. "Someone else dug the pit; it's her own fault for following me and nagging me for so long. I never asked her to tag along!"

"Well you were scared of an Easter egg! I tried to be nice and get rid of it! I bet you just pretended to be scared of it to lure me into the trap!"

"You're scared of Easter eggs?" Asked Irene in sock. "Seriously?"

"You wouldn't laugh if you knew why!" Said Vinnie.

"Guys!" Yelled Tabitha. "Is it just me or do I alwayshave to break up fights? Everyone just take five; how about we finish our theme song? That way we actually have a chance at winning. And if we lose we can settle the argument through votes."

"Fine; I agree." Said Vinnie.

"Me too." Said Fifi stiffly.

"Good; now let's get it on!"

As the girls began working on Fifi's segment Gary and Hector steered Vinnie away from the others.

"What was that all about?" Asked Gary in wonder. "Fifi's seriously annoyed. But I think she's so angry because you're a guy."

"I don't know what I did!" Cried Vinnie. "She fell down a random deep pit and I helped her out; after that she flipped!"

"This may be far fetched but I think that her female supremist mind was unable to accept that a guy had helped her where she, a female, could not help herself, and thus she lashed out at him to reinforce her mind's beliefs. I don't think we can reason with her."

"So what can I do?" Asked Vinnie. "The girls will vote me off if we lose!"

"Maybe not". Said Gary. "I don't think Tabitha likes Fifi too much; there's a chance that she'll convince the others to vote with us. But we may not lose at all. Have hope."

"Oh; I'm hoping alright." Said Vinnie with a sigh.

"Ok Vinnie; time for your part of the theme song." Called Tabitha.

"Thanks for the support guys." Said Vinnie as he went to sing.

"Think he'll be safe?" Asked Gary.

"We can only hope." Said Hector.

* * *

**Confessional- I hope for more confessionals.**

**Vinnie: I think my theme song went pretty well; I just hope it was good enough.**

**Hector: Fifi has a big grudge on Vinnie for no reason. I really think she has problems. Maybe I could discreetly refer her to a phychiatrist.**

* * *

An hour later all three teams were back in the mess hall; Chris had announced that the challenge was over and that judging was to begin. The teams were each grouped together and had given Chris the discs containing their movies. At the front of the mess hall was a widescreen TV which the movies would be watched on.

"Hi again everyone." Said Chris. "Good to see nobody killed anyone in the hours I haven't seen you."

"We were tempted." Said Fifi as her eyes flickered towards Vinnie.

"As great as a murder would be for ratings it would be terrible for lawsuits." Said Chris with regret. Now it is time to judge your theme song movies. I will be giving you a score out of ten; the team with the lowest score is sending someone home. FOREVER!"

Chris yelled the last word which made several campers jump. Chris sniggered and picked up the first disc.

"The first team to go is Team Puzzle." Said Chris as he inserted their disc into a DVD player.

**(The scene on the TV opened to Quana holding a microphone, Eleanor on the harmonica, Spider on the flute and Zita on the bongos. Quana taps a beat with her foot and as the others begin playing their instruments she started to sing).**

_Spider is green and he's on the scene_

_Like a flu pill riding a blood stream_

_He's coughing hard and he's on our team_

_He's Spider, don't ya know what I mean, he's Spider_

_Yo ho on the open sea_

_A pirate's life is for Barney_

__

He'll make the opposition walk the plank

_He owns some Koi that live in a fish tank_

_Oh Barney_

_Eleanor loves animals it is true_

_She's friendly and greets with a howdy do_

_This crazy island is her rainforest_

_She's gonna go far; let's be honest._

_Miss her as she silently goes_

_Zita is quite on her pointy toes_

_She is a girl that sure loves stealing_

_Some say she could be good for healing_

_Nakia loves her brunette hair_

_It's so good it'll make you stare_

_With a comb and some expensive gel_

_Nakia will make this Island hell_

_Shoot for the stars and follow your dreams_

_Andy's obsession rips realities seams_

_Riding a comet through the stratosphere_

_Andy's victory will be high in the atmosphere_

_Jimmy is small and very cute_

_To him life and reality is one big WOOT_

_Fun and games and airplanes_

_He'll make friends and rescue some dames_

_Last is me; Quana's the name_

_I think misery is really quite lame_

_My singing will make others feel a confuzzle_

_Here we go because we're Team Puzzle_

_Oh yeah!_

The DVD stopped and Chris took out the disc. Team Puzzle waited for the result with anxiousness. Chris nodded and spoke.

"Not bad guys; you did pretty well, Quana's singing was great as well. I give you … … … eight out of ten.

"Woohoo!" Whooped Barney.

* * *

**Confessional- Where's MY theme dong huh?**

**Quana: I think that was a real showcase of my singing talent; hopefully we'll get first place.**

**Barney: Alright! I think my verse really kicked butt! Yohohohohoho!**

* * *

After taking out the first disc Chris picked up the second DVD and held it up high.

"The second team to have their work seen is … Team Grenade. Let's hope this doesn't bomb. Haha!" Laughed Chris as he inserted the disc into the DVD player and it began to play.

**(The scene opened to the campgrounds where all of team Grenade were standing. They stood a distance apart and it looked like each would sing their respective verses)**

_Oh what's that sneaking in the dark_

_Carlton is here and he's leaving a mark_

_Whimpering at every sound_

_His victory is nearby abound_

_He punches when they scream,_

_He kicks as they dream_

_Better run for your life_

_Kasimar's here and he loves causing strife_

_One two three and up high_

_Lavender's gonna win without causing a tie_

_She's on a mission to prove her cause_

_She'll get far ahead and leave you behind closed doors_

_Life's a drag and so is school_

_But Xaria here still manages to be cool_

_She will stand straight and say calmly_

_Get lost or face the power that is me_

_Raven is quiet and hardly makes a sound_

_But she's as fast as a young greyhound_

_In the city or on TV_

_Victory is her ultimate key_

_Mwahahahaha_

_Wallace is a bad guy of the world_

_He won't stop until every last innocent spine is curled_

_Mwahahahaha_

_Wallace will END you_

_Oscar is a true born winner_

_Muscles and dumbbells are his dinner_

_With one punch he'll give it at all_

_If after the punch you see anything at all_

_Mable likes healthy food_

_But she is practically a sweet suave dude_

_With her cool hairdo she's got made_

_Mable is a proud member of team Grenade_

The theme song ended and Chris took the disc out of the player; he looked very impressed.

"Well Team Grenade; that was the BOMB!" Smiled Chris. "You did really good; I give it a nine out of ten! And that puts you into first place and definite safety!"

Team Grenade cheered in joy while Team Puzzle felt gutted; they had a chance of losing and sending one of their own down the dock of shame, not a good thing at all.

* * *

**Confessional- Boom!**

**Lavender: Alright! We're safe from elimination … but getting the prize would be even better. But still … we're safe! Eeeeeei! …Oh, did I just squee? Yes, I DO have a girly side, but doesn't every one?**

**Wallace: Safe for another day! This bad guy is going to defeat the forces of evil! And the best part is that I checked my trap and it had been sprung; nobody was down there but it was sprung! I hope they got hurt; Mwahahahaha!**

**Mable: I'm glad that we won; though it would have been good to get rid off Wallace or Kasimar … maybe next time.**

* * *

"The last team to go is none other than Team jungle; can you guys get a perfect ten? Let's find out." Said Chris as he inserted the final disc into the DVD player.

(The scene on the TV showed a foresty background and the members of Team Grenade standing around; some of them seemed to have their bodies over lapping; they must have been edited to be in all at the same time. Music began to play as the song began).

_Leader of school and leader of team_

_Tabitha Barrington is on the scene_

_With blue lipstick and purple steaks_

_That girl could stay standing for weeks_

_She's such the interest of all the boys_

_She has to hire some trained decoys_

_Spatula in hand and holding a fork_

_Gary will cook something with a spork_

_He's a true master Chef_

_Druggies say he's better than meth_

_Metal arm and Russian hat_

_Vinnie tries to be all that_

_Helping those who are in trouble_

_Vinnie will triumphantly rise from the rubble_

_At the sea side and below the waves_

_Yessica owns the sea like some slaves_

_She will one day be queen of the beach_

_And did you know she would like a peach_

_Uzuri is quite a pretty girl_

_Though her Emo doll's sayings make people hurl_

_With the sun and a magnifying glass_

_She'll give not burning ants a pass_

_One plus one equals two_

_Hector's smarts are excellent too_

_Coolest nerd in all the land_

_If you have homework Hector will lend you a hand_

_Trees are our very best friends_

_Irene knows this despite life's bends_

_Plant a seed in a wheelbarrow_

_And maybe make a home for a sparrow_

_Boy's think they're all that_

_But Fifi thinks that is all old hat_

_She is better than even Chris Maclean_

_She has wining down the lane_

The final theme song ended and Chris took it out. For some reason he looked red in the face.

"Well everyone; from watching that movie I think I can declare a loser. The team in last place and the one that will vote someone off today is…

…

…

…

…

…

Team Jungle!"

Team Puzzle cheered in relief while Team Jungle groaned in disappointment and a little anger.

"It was quite easy to decide; besides some weird lyrics their was one main reason … NODOBY IS BETTER THAN ME!" Roared Chris in anger. "I'll see Team Jungle at the Bonfire tonight; once there you will cast your votes. And as for Team Grenade; you're special prize is nail polish and pizza!"

Team Grenade cheered, mostly for the pizza.

Chris left the building to do something like tend to his hair while Tabitha sighed.

"Well everyone; we tried our best but we've lost to the best." Sighed Tabitha in an attempt to gain sympathy. "I hope you don't vote me off for it."

"Oh don't worry Tabitha; there are _others_ who deserve to leave much more." Said Fifi smugly.

"Do you mean Vinnie?" Asked Hector. "This grudge is a little … well … pathetic."

"Oh shut up tubby." Said Fifi calmly. "Vinnie dropped me in a hole today and tried to make me look weak; I could've been really hurt. I've made my decision."

"Since you tried to hurt her … I'm voting with Fifi." Said Yessica as she walked away.

"I agree; you kinda messed up." Said Irene sympathetically.

"And being scared of an Easter egg? Pathetic, just like you." Said Fifi meanly.

"It's how I lost my arm you #bleep#!" Bellowed Vinnie.

"You're gone." Humphed Fifi.

The three girls who were angry at Vinnie left the mess hall as Vinnie himself looked at the ground.

"Why me?" He asked in misery.

* * *

**Confessional- Like voting for the president … except not at all…**

**Fifi: That's it; time to take out the trash … permanently. You know I'm voting for Vinnie. I just hope they'll be no vote switches this year … not that he could think of that.**

**Gary: I don't care what you say Gary did or didn't do Fifi … I'm voting for you!**

**Irene: Fifi sure was lucky she didn't get too hurt; she isn't really bad I bet … she just has trust issues. I'll fix that after Mr. Metal arm is gone.**

**Tabitha: This is great; I didn't even have to spread dirt about Vinnie. Vinnie has a chance to go with some of the others voting with Fifi. Fifi herself could go thanks to what I told Uzuri … and I'm sure one of fat and thin will vote with Vinnie. As for me; I have a choice to make … who would be more of an asset, a girl who would do whatever I say because of my gender … or I guy with a really strong arm. Hmmm.**

* * *

Later that night all eight members of Team Jungle were sitting around the bonfire ceremony area on logs and stumps. Chris walked up solemnly with a tray of seven marshmallows. He placed them on an oil drum and looked at the team in disappointment.

"Team Jungle; it sure sucks to be you guys; you have lost the first team challenge much like the killer bass from last season. I have with me seven marshmallows; one of you will not get a marshmallow ,that person is eliminated and mist immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. And you can't come back … ever."

Chris finished his explanation and looked around at the eight in front of him. Soon there would be seven and the competition would start getting really serious.

"So before we start … do you have anything to say as it could potentially be your last few minutes on this Island.

"I just want to say I hope we win next time." Said Tabitha. "I don't really like losing."

"We won't lose once Vinnie's gone; he just slows us down." Said Fifi from her stump. Next to her Vinnie sighed and hung his head in anguish.

"Lay off him." Said Gary. "His theme song was better than yours."

"Whatever white hat; your words mean little to me." Sniffed Fifi haughtily.

"Very well." Said Chris. "The first person through tonight is Uzuri."

"I knew I'd me and my emo doll would be safe. Teehee! What do you think Little miss emo?" Said Uzuri as she pulled the string.

"Hack away and make my day! Heheheheheh!" Laughed the doll which as usual scared most of the others.

"Also going into the next round is Hector.

"Excellent." Said Hector as he went to claim his marshmallow.

"Tabitha"

"Irene

"Gary

"Yessica"

Only Fifi and Vinnie were left; Fifi looked confident but Vinnie was wide eyed and looked at the final marshmallow.

"This is the final Marshmallow." Said Chris. "One of you is about to lose … and I can truthfully reveal that the final person going through tonight is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Vinnie".

Vinnie gasped in relief and ran up to claim his marshmallow. He ate it in relief and triumph. He was through to the next day.

Fifi sat in her seat in shock and had her mouth open wide. She blinked in disbelief and started stuttering silently.

"Well Fifi; you've been voted off; I'm not really shocked, you said you were better than me. And unlike Ezekiel you knew what you said was wrong; time to go." Said Chris with a frown.

Fifi started breathing in and out angrily and stood up. She snarled at her team and pointed.

"How can this be? There are more girls than guys; which of you girls voted for me?"

Uzuri and Tabitha raised their hands. Fifi screamed in anger.

"I'll get you back; just you wait and see!"

Fifi turned towards the dock of shame and stormed towards it furiously. An intern loaded her belongings on as she boarded it and was swiftly driven away.

The remaining seven turned to Chris as they finished their marshmallows.

"Good job you seven; you're survived elimination … this time. You may go to your cabin now. And try not to lose next time."

The seven team Jungle members walked away from the bonfire ceremony area and back to their cabin for a relaxing sleep. Chris looked out at the boat of losers disappearing on the horizon and then turned to the camera man.

"And that ends the second day of Total Drama Letterz; Fifi is gone and Vinnie has managed to scrape through. Will Vinnie ever be able to prove he had nothing to do with the hole? Will Team Jungle lose again? And who will be the next person to walk the dock of shame. Find out next time on Total … Drama … Letterz. And don't you think a latté is the best drink because I do … now bring me one!

* * *

**Confessional- Survivors**

**Tabitha: In the end I decided to vote for Fifi; I just think Vinnie is more useful with his strong arm … plus he doesn't discriminate against a number of the team. Next time we'll win. The million dollars shall be MINE; and nobody will stop me, nobody.**

* * *

**Votes**

**Tabitha- Fifi**

**Vinnie- Fifi**

**Fifi- Vinnie**

**Yessica- Vinnie**

**Irene- Vinnie**

**Gary- Fifi**

**Hector- Fifi**

**Uzuri- Fifi**

**Total- **

**Fifi 5**

**Vinnie 3**

And that's the end of day 2; Fifi has been voted off and Team Jungle is at a disadvantage. Can they pull through? Maybe they will ... or not.

Next time the teams find themselves snookered upon seeing the next challenge.

If you enjoyed this chapter, and the story in general, why not leave a review? I read them all!


	5. Day 3, Part 1, Trouble Comes In Three's

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, or action or the in my opinion awful third season. They belong to both Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 who uses it in his story Total Drama Alphabet. Give his stories a read if you get a chance; they are really good! Abd before you get any ideas I own all twenty six of the OC's in this story so please don't steal them.

**The warning:** This story contains bullying, love, bad language, sad moments, innuendo, that sort of thing. As always though it is nothing M rated.

**Pairings:** You'll find out one day.

**Note- **Here's the first part of day three; I hope you all enjoy it, it may be slightly shorter than the others but the next chapter will make up for that. Also thank you everyone for the reviews.

**To Frank15**: Sorry that you dislike Vinnie so much; but don't worry, you'll see Fifi again eventually. The reason I kept Vinnie and not Fifi was that there was more I could do with his character than Fifi rambling about her views on men.

**Bad-asp: **Thanks for the positive review; while F may be for fan-freaking tasting ... T is for thank you!

**Poll: **Go to my profile to vote on who is your favourite team ... but only if you want to.

Here we go again!

* * *

It was early morning at Camp Wawanakwa; the campers were still asleep though knowing Chris, not for much longer. Chris himself was standing on the dock of shame with another latté in hand. He sipped it and smiled his pearly whites to the camera.

"Last time on Total Drama letterz. The newly formed teams started their first challenge." Said Chris epically. "They were tasked with making a theme song for their team; not particularly dangerous but that'll be made up for today. Anyway; as the teams progressed Team Jungle decided to take a break. Thanks to a trap our resident bad guy Wallace built Fifi ended up stuck in a hole. Thanks to a poor usage of words which I myself think was quite stupid; Fifi lashed out at Vinnie and stormed off."

Chris nodded and clapped his hands.

"When the movies were shown Team Grenade took first place, Team Puzzle got second and Team Jungle came last and thus had to vote someone off. It unsurprisingly came down to Fifi and Vinnie. By a majority of five to three votes it was Fifi who took the fall and a ride on the boat of losers."

Chris muttered something that sounded like good riddance and smiled again.

"Who will be the next to walk the dock of shame? What will the challenge be? And will Gary ever teach Chef anything about cooking? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz.

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

**(Team Grenade Guys)**

Oscar ate a slice of pizza in content; it had been a good day, winning AND getting pizza. Kasimar and Wallace were also pleased and had eaten seven slices each. Carlton on the other hand hadn't touched any pizza.

"Hey Carlton; why aren't you eating any pizza?" Asked Oscar. "Are you afraid of Pizza?"

"Well; pizza contains cheese, cheese contains milk and milk comes from cows, I'm scared of cows."

"I should have guessed." Sighed Oscar. "Any reason why?"

"They're evil!" Cried Carlton. "Haven't you heard the sounds they make?"

"Evil you say?" Said Wallace with a smirk. "I should get a pet cow as my evil steed of evil!"

"Evil is scary!" Whimpered Carlton.

"Everything is scary in some way." Said Oscar as he downed another slice of Pizza. "You should focus on what doesn't scare you instead of what scares you … and you might still be here when Chris possibly announces a fear challenge."

"Oh no!" Cowered Carlton.

"You're a scare baby 'Crapton'." Sneered Kasimar. "If you went to my school I'd have my gang beat you to a pulp to man you up. Seriously … grow a pair wimpy!"

"I bet his favorite food is a wimpy burger!" Sniggered Wallace. "Teasing is so evil! Mwahahahaha!"

"Is evil all you think about Wallace?" Asked Oscar with a raised eyebrow. "You are a walking stereotype, you're not a villain, you're a wannabe villain."

"At least I don't take steroids." Retorted Wallace sharply.

"I don't take those things; they're for pathetic losers." Said Oscar indifferently.

"So you should take them." Said Kasimar with a smirk. "You're a loser so steroids would be right up your street, failure road."

"Don't you have better things to do than antagonize everyone?" Asked Oscar with irritation.

"Why not? Making people miserable is funny." Replied Kasimar.

"And even more funny than that is destroying something; preferably someone's prized possession! Mwahahahaha!"

"You're laughter is scary." Whimpered Carlton.

"I aim for it to be." Replied Wallace. "It's eeeeeeevil!"

Carlton pulled his covers over himself and shivered in fear. Oscar just sighed and shook his head.

"You guys are crazy; you know that?" Said Oscar flatly.

"Crazy is as evil does! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace.

"You might want to cut down on the evil laughter dude." Said Kasimar as he ran a hand though his Mohawk. "People will think you're retarded."

"But its fun … fine; I'll just play my theme music for a while."

Wallace took out a remote and pressed the button. Evil organ music began to play from nowhere.

"Ok seriously; where does that keep comes from?" Asked Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional- My bunk mates are crazy!**

**Oscar: The girls on the team are fine … but my fellow guys are crazy. Wallace is a maniac and is … unique, Kasimar is a sadistic awful bully who mumbles about killing on his sleep. And Carlton is the most normal but even then he is scared of everything imaginable, he even said he's afraid of Chihuahua's because they look creepy. This gonna be a long summer.**

**Kasimar: The pizza was good; I think it would have been better if it was spicier; I like spicy stuff, especially Vindaloo. I have a really strong tongue so it doesn't burn easy. Get's me noticed and feared … just how I like it.**

* * *

**(Team Grenade; Girls)**

The four girls had awoken not long ago and had changed into their normal cloths. Mable and Lavender had made use of the nail polish and both sported dark purple nails on their hands and feet. Like the guys they had been eating pizza but Mable hadn't touched any of it.

"Hey Mable; why haven't you eaten any pizza?" Asked Lavender.

"I don't like pizza ... actually, to put emphasis on that I don't like junk food … at all." Said Mable casually.

"You don't like any junk food? Not even KFC?" Said Lavender in surprise.

"Nope; anything crispy and deep fried is not something I would consider eating." Said Mable. "I am labeled the health food fanatic you know; though personally I would have rather been called the Tough Resourceful Girl."

"A life without junk food; tragic." Said Xaria. "I don't mind healthy food but I *cannot* and *will not* go life without toaster pastries, especially the type with icing and a gooey center."

"Why t-toaster pastries?" Asked Raven.

"They're my favorite food." Said Xaria. "I love greasy foods yet I never seem to gain any weight; high metabolism I guess."

"Yuck!" Gagged Mable. "Greasy foods are like death in a paper bag."

"But they taste so good." Relied Xaria.

"But they clog your arteries." Pointed out Mable.

"What doesn't? And we're all gonna die eventually, why prolong the inevitable?" Grumbled Xaria.

"W-w-why do you t-t-think so negatively?" Asked Raven shyly.

"Why think so positively?" Asked Xaria.

"Maybe we should go and get breakfast." Suggested Lavender. "If Xaria wants to be negative then don't stop her; freedom of speech people, right?"

* * *

**Confessional- If I agreed with you then we'd both be wrong**

**Xaria: Greasy food; the one good thing ion the world, and even then it has flaws. Mable should learn to live a little; she didn't even eat the pizza crust and that's like the healthiest part of the pizza!**

**Lavender: The pizza was a good break from Chef's slop; today's special was bacon rind and the tops of carrots. What was Chris thinking when he hired him? Probably something like 'I hope he makes someone choke'; Chris is such a dick.**

**Mable: Greasy food; my ultimate foe. Why can't people appreciate a fruit salad? Or maybe jerky? I bet in a hundred years everyone will look like the humans from WALL-E.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle; girls)**

The four girls of Team Jungle were laying on their beds deep in conversation. They were talking about the recent vote off of Fifi and why Uzuri and Tabitha didn't vote for Vinnie.

"I just don't know why you didn't vote off Vinnie." Said Yessica. "He would have deserved it; he dug a hole for Fifi to fall down!"

"Do you have any proof?" Asked Tabitha from her bunk.

"Fifi said he did and she looked pretty serious." Said Yessica. "And she didn't look like she was lying."

"Objection." Replied Tabitha. "Fifi blamed Vinnie because he was a guy and was the only person in the vicinity; she didn't think that it could have been dug by someone else. And let's be serious, the hole was apparently ten foot deep. Vinnie was with us all the time until the break; Fifi followed him and then fell down the hole. Where did he get the time to dig the hole?"

"Maybe he's a fast digger." Suggested Irene as she put a finger to her chin in thought.

"I see two problems wrong with that theory." Said Tabitha as she sat up. "One; Vinnie has one normal arm; his other arm ends in pincers so he couldn't properly hold the shovel with it and therefore couldn't have dug the hole. And two; even if Vinnie had used a shovel, he isn't exactly Mr. Muscle; he would have showed signs of tiredness after it wouldn't he?"

"That … could actually be correct." Said Yessica in shock.

"Fifi was pretty mean." Said Uzuri. "She acted nasty to all guys without being provoked and she was going to destroy my doll!"

"She was?" Said Irene in surprise. "Why would she do that? It may be creepy but it's your possession."

"My prized possession." Said Uzuri with a nod. "Tabitha said she heard Fifi saying she would break it; what did Little Miss Emo do to her?"

Uzuri pulled the string on the doll and it began to say another creepy phrase.

"_Freddy Krueger haunts your dreams; but I'll cut my veins at the seams! Heheheheheh_"

The other three stared at the doll and Yessica trembled in a little fright.

"Err; Uzuri? Where did you get that doll?"

"From WAL-MART!" Grinned Uzuri. "They have everything; though the internet helped me find out WAL-MART had the doll … and is there anything you can't get from the internet?"

A silence arose; maybe Uzuri was right. Irene cleared her throat and spoke.

"Yes; there is one thing you can't get … and that is your virginity back." Said Irene before laughing hysterically.

"Good one!" Laughed Uzuri.

Tabitha sighed and put her head to her hand.

"Oh I have so much work to do." She grumbled.

"Cheer up Tabitha." Said Yessica. "At least we don't have Kasimar on the team."

"Your right." Said Tabitha with a false smile. "That is a good thing."

* * *

**Confessional- Confess your sins.**

**Tabitha: Did I care whether Vinnie was guilty or not? No. But I needed to stop any inner team conflict before it began; and besides the fact Vinnie obviously didn't dig the hole, when I tell him I cleared his name he'll be in my debt; and thus he'll help me.**

**Irene: Maybe Vinnie didn't dig the hole … but I'll still keep my eye on him; he did snap at Fifi a fair bit.**

**Uzuri: I'm glad Fifi is gone; now my doll is safe; I'm sure I'll be fine with Tabitha as team leader. Maybe today's challenge will involve watching a horror movie; I love horror movies! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!**

* * *

**(Team Jungle; guys)**

Gary sat on his bunk and looked at his cabin mates; Hector was reading a thick book and making notes in a note book while Vinnie appeared deep in thought on his bed. Silence had been in the room for half on hour now and Gary was growing tired of it.

"Guys; I know we lost the challenge but you don't have to stay silent and feel sorry for yourselves." Said Gary. "Can't you all; I dunno; SAY SOMETHING?

"What would you like us to say?" Asked Hector without looking up from his book.

"I'm not sure; but I just like hearing noise, I'm not fond of silence, it bores me and I prefer to keep myself amused." Said Gary. "What book are you reading anyway? Is it an anime?"

"Not even close." Said Hector. "I'm working through my core mathematics trigonometry book; I'm keeping my math skills well oiled."

"Why bother; it's the summer and we're on a game show, nobodies going to be interested in watching someone do math."

"I just enjoy math; it's my idea of fun." Said Hector honestly. "Though I do also enjoy quiz shows and role playing games."

"You mean like who wants to be a millionaire?"

"Precisely; it's always interesting to see how smart other people are when on TV and out of their comfort zone. I'd like to go on the show as well; I'm sure I'd get past at minimum the first seven questions; they ask obscure facts and I know some obscure stuff like a crocodile cannot stick out its tongue." Said Hector as he put his math book into his bedside cupboard.

A depressed sigh filled the room and Gary and Hector turned their attention to Vinnie who was lying on his bed staring blankly up at the top bunk.

"Are you ok Vinnie? You look as though someone hit you with a cactus and threw an ice cream truck at you at twenty five miles an hour." Said Gary in an attempt to cause humor; It didn't work.

"I don't know guys; I'm happy that I survived elimination but I have a really bad feeling in me. I just don't know why."

"Ok; could you describe it?" Asked Hector.

"It feels like an unpleasant lump caused by someone squeezing my intestines in their hands." Said Vinnie.

"I think what you are experiencing is guilt." Said Hector. "Maybe it has to do with Fifi being voted off?"

"I don't think so; she hated me, I sure didn't like her. I didn't feel any guilt when I voted for her to leave. But … I still feel something."

"Maybe it would help if you went back to your biggest conflict with her from yesterday." Suggested Hector.

"Well; I had gone for a walk in the woods; on the way Fifi followed me and began pointing out my flaws and how awful I was." Said Vinnie in recollection. "After a while I asked her to leave me alone … then we saw an Easter egg and for reasons I will refrain from mentioning I froze on the spot. Fifi went to remove it. The ground beneath her gave way and she fell into a pit. I got a vine and helped her out. I said something and then she exploded at me and stormed off. I don't get it."

"What exactly did you say before she 'exploded' at you?" Asked Hector urgently.

"Hmmm; I think … I think I said something like 'No thanks necessary; I just hope you remember this good deed."

"Oh dear," Said Gary as he and Hector cringed.

"What is it?" Asked Vinnie.

"I think you said the wrong thing; Fifi may have thought you were being smug and snobby about it all." Said Hector. "I think it's no wonder that she flipped."

"I didn't mean that at all." Said Vinnie frantically.

"Then what did you mean?" Asked Gary.

"I meant that I next time she was to insult me or call me a useless sexist that she should remember I helped her even when I could have left. That way we could call a truce and end the pointless conflict." Explained Vinnie. "But every now and then I mess up what I try to say; I'm really very social back home."

"Ooooooh." Said Gary with a nod. "So you thought you had helped her; that explains why you were angry at her as the day progressed."

"So what should I do?" Asked Vinnie.

"I suggest that next time you see Fifi you should explain yourself; and stand your ground if she starts yelling at you." Said Hector. "And anyway; you weren't completely innocent either; you did swear at her."

"Yeah; you're right; for some reason I always feel bad after I've upset someone; I've defiantly got a guilty conscious."

"But who dug the hole?" Asked Gary in puzzlement.

"I'm not sure." Said Vinnie. "But it honestly wasn't me; I suck at garden work."

* * *

**Confessional- I make mistakes too … well actually I don't.**

**Hector: I feel that for once I put my smarts to good use back there; I may seem psychological but that's because I want to be a psychologist after I complete my education. And the million dollars would help with that very much.**

**Vinnie: I feel better now; but Fifi was pretty nasty. But …maybe she just needs a friend or something; in her time here I didn't notice anyone really liking her very much. It was kind of hard to like her with her sexist attitude … but still…**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle guys)**

Spider blew his nose for the umpteenth time since he had woken up and tossed the tissue in the bin. The bin itself was filled with tissues; it was a good thing Spider had bought a fair supply with him when packing for the island. Andy, Barney and Jimmy looked at the bin in concern.

"You sure do blow your nose a lot." Said Andy. "Does it hurt at all?"

"Not a bit." Said Spider with a shrug. "I've *cough* blown my nose so many times that I *cough* don't feel any discomfort anymore."

"That's good; it must be pretty nasty being sick all the time and never socializing with anyone." Said Andy with some sympathy.

"It's not really that *cough* bad; I have a few *sneeze* friends in hospital that *cough* I hang out with."

"Yaaar! It's good to have some good first mates to hang out with savvy." Said Barney as he jumped down from the top bunk and adjusted his hat. "I don't know what I would be without my crew."

"By crew do you mean friends?" Asked Andy.

"Yes I do! Yo ho!" Grinned Barney widely.

"Why do you like pirates so much Barney?" Asked Jimmy with innocent curiosity.

"They're fascinating me cabin boy; and also they're awesome, Muppet Treasure Island, need I say more me heartie?" Said Barney with a smile.

"I love that movie." Smiled Jimmy. "I laughed all the way through … but then again I find almost anything funny. Say; do any of you want to hear a joke?"

"Sure; why not, is it a space joke?" Asked Andy.

"Nope; but it's still good, ahem, what do you call cheese that isn't yours?"

"I have no *cough* idea." Said Spider.

"Nach-yo cheese, get it?" Laughed Jimmy.

"Yohohohohoho!" Laughed Barney as he slapped his knee merrily.

"That was a good one." Said Andy. "Usually food jokes suck."

"Got anymore?" Asked Spider.

"Ok, ok, how about this" Said Jimmy." Did you hear about the man who drowned in the muesli?"

"No; what happened to *cough* him?" Asked Spider.

"A strong currant pulled him in; get it?" Asked Jimmy while trying not to laugh.

Barney laughed and fell down in hysterics.

"Yohohohohoho; once again me heartie, you have split my sides!" Laughed Barney.

"With jokes like that you're sure to keep the team morale up." Said Andy with a laugh.

"Oh I'm just doing what comes natural." Said Jimmy modestly.

* * *

**Confessional- I can tell jokes too; they just aren't very good.**

**Jimmy: I have a pretty good sense of humor; I just like making people smile. I guess if Dungeons and Dragons was bought into this my alignment would be lawful good. But as for that blue Mohawk bully … chaotic evil at best. **

**Spider: I always like a good** *cough*** joke; granted that a lot of them are terrible … but ***cough*** Jimmy is genuinely funny. I can tell he'll be ***sneeze*** good fun to have on the team. Oh boy; I think I'm gonna be ***gag*** sick.**

**Andy: Barney sure does like laughing; he didn't stop laughing for three minutes straight; I can tell jokes too, like, what do you call a crying alien ship? ... A crying saucer!**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle girls)**

Quana lay sleeping on her bed peacefully; she was having a very nice dream about becoming a famous singer; but it was about to be rudely interrupted.

"AAAAAAARGH!"

Quana shot up and alert and wildly looked around; Nakia was looking at a spilt bottle of hair conditioner on the floor in horror.

"Any particular reason you woke me by screaming?" Asked Quana in sleepy annoyance.

"Yes! A very good reason; I accidently spilt some of my best hair conditioner; now my hair will only be excellent … it won't be perfect." Whined Nakia.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again … is there anything else to you but hair?" Asked Quana in disbelief at the level of obsession Nakia had for her hair.

"Of course … but my hair is my selling point and gets me ahead in life." Explained Nakia.

"What do you two think?" Asked Quana to Eleanor and Zita. "Is she too obsessed with her hair?"

"I agree," Said Zita. "She focuses frivolously on her hair; look at me in comparison, my hair is untidy and unkept but I'm still alive."

"You have my support as well Quana." Said Eleanor. "I think you obsess over it too much; there are other things in life."

"Whatever; you have your opinions and I have mine, just like my opinion is that you are all ugly." Said Nakia as she left the cabin and shut the door behind her.

"Grrrr!" Snarled Quana. "That girl is so annoying; she's like a living ear worm! Maybe she should have been in Heather's place last season so she could get her hair shaved off!"

"And she called us ugly." Said Eleanor in frustration. "What nerve!"

"If you want I could steal her hair lotions and toss them into the sea." Offered Zita. "That would be instant karma."

"Good idea … but she would just keep us up all night with her whining." Said Quana as she got off her bed. "Voting her off would be better; we'd never hear from her again … or at least until and if we get voted off."

"Shall we go and get breakfast?" Asked Eleanor as she reached into the ferret cage and stroked her frost under his chin.

"Sure; even though Chef serves us slop we still need to eat." Said Zita.

* * *

**Confessional- Cough! Hairball!**

**Eleanor: Nakia is a spoilt princess who tries to sway others with her hair. I don't really like her even though I always try to get along with everyone. Maybe she could redeem herself before it's too late?**

**Quana: Nakia is trying my usually immense patience; hair this and split ends that, urgh! When we go to a bonfire ceremony and she is still here, my vote goes to her, no doubt about it. But then again; I don't really want to lose either; the more team members we have the easier it will be to win.**

**Nakia: **(Brushing her hair and singing). **I am pretty, I am smart, I am a walking work of art!**

* * *

A little while later all twenty three campers were seated in the mess hall while they were eating their disgusting food. And by 'they were eating their disgusting food' I mean Team Puzzle and Team Grenade. Thanks to Gary it was another nice meal for Team Jungle.

Gary was sitting with his team mates and was eating waffles with milk and cookies; he was telling them about what had just happened in the kitchen.

"Teaching Chef Hatchet how to cook is going to be harder than I first thought." He said to the others. "When I was showing hi how to make cupcakes he added salt instead of sugar. But it'll be worth it; as long as I tutor him I'm allowed to cook for you all."

"You're a much better Chef than crazy man." Said Irene. "You could tell the difference between a cleaver and a spoon."

"Thanks." Said Gary. "But right now we've got more important things to do than talk about cooking, even though I'd love to. With Fifi gone our team is at a disadvantage."

"We'll have to try harder than before." Said Yessica as she drank some juice. "Hopefully this time the challenge will be easier, or something you can do easier with fewer people."

"Knowing Chris … I doubt it." Said Vinnie.

"Well we have to give it our all." Said Tabitha. "For better or for worse we must try."

* * *

**Confessional- Try to confess!**

**Tabitha: If they don't try then I will have to think of a way to escape elimination and also find a scapegoat. I don't want to be at an even greater disadvantage.**

**Vinnie: I feel like I'm on thin ice … maybe I can make up for it in today's challenge.**

* * *

As the campers continued talking Chris entered the mess hall with an air horn and a megaphone. He put the megaphone in front of the air horn and pressed the button.

The results were immediate; everyone turned around, some screamed, some had their heart rate increase tenfold … and Carlton fainted. Chris laughed sadistically at the campers reactions and began the explanation.

"Good morning campers." Said Chris. "I hope you had a good sleep, which is what I would say if I cared about you. Its day three and it is now time to make the challenges more extreme. And by the end of today some of you are going to feel snookered indeed."

"Does the word snookered have anything to do with the challenge?" Asked Lavender.

"Indeed it does; you are going to be playing snooker for today's challenge." Said Chris a little too happily. "But don't feel relaxed; it's going to have a few twists to it … and it is on a slightly bigger scale."

"How m-much bigger?" Asked Raven uncertainly.

"Oh; just a little, not much, haha." Sniggered Chris sadistically.

* * *

**Confessional- I'm big as well … oh wait, no!**

**Raven: N-not funny Chris!**

**Yessica: When I saw the challenge … I wondered if Chris was dropped on his head as a baby.**

* * *

The campers were led to the challenge and saw what they would be playing 'snooker' on. In front of them was a huge snooker table that towered above everyone; it was simply too big to be allowed. It had to be just a little bit less large than a foot ball pitch. It had six ball pockets at the corners and sides. Next to it were three raised platforms with ramps leading into the arena.

"Alrighty all twenty three of you; this is today's challenge … human snooker!" Announced Chris. "If you've played real snooker, which I expect most of you have, you should know what to do."

"Get the balls down the holes?" Asked Jimmy.

A number of the other guys burst out laughing while some of the girls looked disapproving.

"What?" Asked Jimmy. "Loads of games have balls; and somewhere to get them. Foot balls, basket balls, golf balls, cricket balls."

This was too much; everyone started laughing though Jimmy still didn't know why.

* * *

**Confessional- BALLS!**

**Jimmy: I don't get it; did I say a joke? I wasn't meaning to be funny then. Maybe it's a teenager thing? Maybe somebody could explain it to me.**

**Kasimar: Yahahaha! Oh boy; that was funny, dirty jokes always make my day. Too bad I'm gonna have to break that kid to bits. Oh wait; it's not bad because it's fun! Yahahaha!**

**Eleanor: Poor Jimmy; poor sweet naïve Jimmy; I don't think he understood why everyone was laughing. I'm never going to be able to say *balls* the same way again.**

* * *

"Are you all done laughing?" Asked Chris in frustration.

"Sure my evil Idol." Said Wallace. "What evil things will we have to do? Mwuhahaha!

"I will tell you all … right after the commercial break. So to all you at home … will Team Jungle lose again? Will Vinnie redeem himself? And will Jimmy know the double meaning of what he just said? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!

"The show where evil prevails! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

* * *

**Confessional- (Insert evil laughter here)**

**Mable: When Chris first said snooker I thought we had it in the bag; I'm a good snooker player … but human snooker? This could be difficult.**


	6. Day 3, Part 2, Eight ball, Corner Pocket

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or World tour; they belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet them, that belongs to Frank15. I do own all twenty sic contestants though, so don't steal them.

**The warning:** This story containd bad language, bullying, a bit of love and hair related discrimination. You have been warned.

**Pairings: **You'll find out one day.

**Note:** Here's the final part of day three; it was very fun to write. Another person walks the dock of shame. Read on to find out who.

**Shout out:** My good friend Bad Asp has a companian story to Total Drama Alphabet, it's called A is for Allyssa, give it a read; it's really good, honest! (Pinky swears).

Let's get it on!

* * *

"And welcome back to Total Drama Letterz." Said Chris with a smile. "If you are just joining us then you've missed out on about half of the episode, but we're just about to start the challenge."

"When you say welcome back; where did we go?" Asked Mable. "We didn't go anywhere; we just stood here for three seconds."

"You wouldn't understand; you're just not as smart as me." Said Chris idly. "But enough of nothing; it's time to explain the rules of the challenge. You may have noticed that there is a giant snooker table in front of you right?"

"How could we not notice; we aren't blind stupid." Said Kasimar with a lot of rudeness.

"Good; now as you know today's challenge is Human Snooker, there are a number of special rules and surprises to explain. First of all every one of you is going to be one of the balls."

"So you mean we'll be in hamster balls or something?" Asked Nakia.

"Correct you are Nakia." Said Chris. "Each team will have one ball per person on their team. The idea is to knock your opponent's balls into the pockets at the edge of the table. The first team to lose all their ... err … spheres, loses. The last team with spheres standing wins."

"So it's a bit like sumo wrestling then." Said Yessica.

"A little; but none of you are fat … well, except you Hector." Said Chris snidely.

"Thank you for pointing that out Chris, the attention means a lot to me." Said Hector sarcastically.

"It should; everyone loves me speaking to them." Bragged Chris. "But seriously, all you really have to do is get the other teams into the holes. You have twenty minutes before you start the challenge so feel free to strategize and mingle in the mean time … and try to cause drama. Now if you losers will excuse me it's time for my Latté."

Chris turned on his heel and left to his private quarters while the teams looked amongst each other and quickly moved away to more secluded locations for planning. Nobody saw two figures slip away to the raised platforms the balls were on.

* * *

**Confessional- When you can't take the heat … cheat!**

**Eleanor: I don't know why but I have a bad feeling about this challenge; then again I suppose most people would have a bad feeling about anything Chris schemes up.**

**Tabitha: I don't think we'll lose this challenge; we may have the disadvantage as far as numbers go but Hector is so heavy that he'll be hard to shunt around. As long as we don't lose all will be well.**

**Lavender: I hope this won't be too dangerous; but even though I hate to admit it, we may have a good chance with Kasimar on the team; though Oscar will be REALLY useful as well. Maybe our team could be the strongest this season, which would be nice.**

**Oscar: Oh boy, this challenge is going to be fun, it'll be just like that show gladiators. I've watched it since season oneish. Time to rock and ride!**

* * *

(**Team Puzzle)**

The eight team members were in a team huddle away from the others; they were discussing plans and strategy to guarantee victory. At this moment in time Andy was explaining his strategy that he called 'shoot for the stars.

"So what I think we should do is arrange ourselves into a sort of moving wall and ram into a stand alone foe; the force will knock them back into a hole." Explained Andy confidently. "I call it shoot for the stars because that's what we'll be doing if the plan works."

"Good idea matey." Nodded Barney. "Maybe if we put some spin on our balls we could send the opposition flying; would send them backwards at an angle and if it was in between twenty and twenty five degrees, depending on the speed the person inside would be bowled over, what do you think matey's arrrrr?"

Everyone looked very surprised; did Barney, the weird pirate kid just say something highly intelligent? A few team members blinked and Barney raised an eyebrow.

"What arrr?"

"When did you become so intelligent?" Asked Zita. "I never got the impression you had oodles of brain cells in your noggin."

"Oh it's nothing, I just study when I'm not watching pirate movies or playing Ratchet and Clank quest for booty. So, what do you think?"

"I say that idea will work well." Agreed Eleanor. "If we knock the opponents over we can bump them into the hole with no resistance."

"I don't really want to go in a hamster ball." Whined Nakia. !"It will mess up my hair; then I'll get dandruff from the dirt and that'll be terrible."

"It's just *cough* hair." Said Spider. "My hair isn't very *cough* stylish and I get *cough* on fine."

"You're right there; your hair is absolutely dreadful; I pity the hairdresser who has to style it."

"But Nakia; it's still just hair, it doesn't effect what type of a person you are. Spider may not have nice hair but he's a nice person." Said Jimmy bravely. "You have nice hair … but you're not nice at all, you're just plain MEAN!"

"Oh shut up kid; I'm big and you're small; and besides, your hair is just plain ugly."

"So?" Said Jimmy. "I prefer to make an impression based on my personality rather than my appearance … and I hate haircuts."

"Focus people." Said Quana in an attempt to stop the inevitable fight. "Arguing is going to get us nowhere. We need to get along if only for a short while. Just try and find whatever good there is in each other."

"Okey dokie." Said Jimmy. "Want to start over Nakia?"

Jimmy extended a hand for a shake but Nakia looked at it in disgust.

"The day I socialize with somebody with a permanent bad hair day is the day my hair is ugly."

And with that Nakia turned and stormed away to her cabin; presumably to brush her hair. Jimmy looked at her for a moment in confusion.

"Was it something I said?" Asked Jimmy.

"Not at all little guy." Said Quana kindly. "She's just an open book, a shallow puddle. She's got nothing going for her besides her hair. I don't think Nakia will get much further the way she's going."

"So me hearties; are we ready to make our adversaries swab the deck?" Asked Barney with his usual genki grin.

"I sure *cough* am." Said Spider with a weak thumbs up.

"We're with you all the way Barney." Said Eleanor. "But by the way; what other smart things do you know?"

"Oh you know, a little of this and a little of that arrrrr." Said Barney modestly with hand quotations.

* * *

**Confessional- I'd be smart if outhouses like me had a brain.**

**Barney: I think I did good back there yo ho; I'm not a one boat guy, I know things just like the nest person. But I find pirates more interesting than school work. Geography, yuck!**

**Nakia: I'm sorry if I hurt the little guy's feelings … but he's got to learn that ugly people are footstools for works of art like myself. And I'm confident we'll pull of a victory today; Team Jungle has the number disadvantage so they'll surely fail. Duh!**

**Jimmy: Can't we all just get along? When will people learn, war is not a game!**

* * *

**(Team Grenade)**

Lavender looked over her team, Raven stood silently to the side, Mable was munching on an orange, Carlton was looking at a nearby oak tree in fear, Oscar was flexing his muscles and Xaria had her arms crossed and was grumbling under her breath. Wallace and Kasimar had disappeared unnoticed. It looked like things would go fine with winkus and dinkus out of the picture, for a time anyway.

"Any ideas for a game plan guys?" Asked Carlton. "I hope it doesn't involve anything big with red eyes; those things give me the heebie jeebies."

"Don't worry Carlton; we won't do anything scary unless you think a small run down a sizeable slide is scary." Said Mable with a reassuring nod.

"What?" Yelped Carlton. "I hate speed and slopes, I always fall over. Pain scares me."

"Just like everything else." Pointed out Xaria with a grumble. "Why are you so scared of everything? I don't think it's natural to be that scared."

"Well … I'm just a little timid." Whimpered Carlton

"I'd say a BIT more than a little." Said Xaria. "Let's put this into perspective; what's your worst fear?"

"Well…" Mumbled Carlton before trailing off and looking away.

Xaria sighed and slapped her forehead and dragged her hand down her face with a grumble.

"C'mon, spill your internal organs!" Said Xaria impatiently with a finger snap.

"What?" Screamed Carlton is horror. "You're gonna gut me?"

"I think she mean 'spill the beans'." Said Oscar gently. "Seriously Xaria, you're not bad or anything but the way you get slang wrong could land you into trouble."

"I should probably buy a slang dictionary." Said Xaria with a nod. "But you can't teach a young dog new tricks … if that's how the saying goes."

"I believe we were going to discuss strategy and talk about Carlton's unnatural amount of fears." Said Lavender as she smirked at Xaria's obvious blunt metaphors trauma. "So Carlton; why exactly are you so scared … and what scares you the most?"

"Well … you'll probably laugh but my greatest fear … is … lawn gnomes."

"Seriously? Couldn't it be something actually scary, like a mind flayer?" Grumbled Xaria with an eye roll. "But why are you scared of lawn gnomes?"

"I just don't like them; what with their beady eyes, still stance, fishing rods … and pointy hats." Said Carlton in growing fear. "I just don't like them."

"I understand Carlton; nobody is fearless." Said Oscar as he flexed for a moment. "But what are we going to do as a game plan?"

"I think you will be central to that Oscar." Said Lavender strategically. "You're not only the strongest on the team but also the strongest in the competition, do you think you could ram into the smaller opponents like Jimmy and Uzuri? They'll be the easiest to knock down the holes."

"No problem Red." Said Oscar with a nod.

"Just don't hurt them and … wait, did you call me Red?" Asked Lavender with a raised eyebrow.

"Well your outfit is mostly red and so is your hair." Explained Oscar. "I think a good exercise of team spirit would be giving each other cool nicknames."

"Or it could decrease moral and make everyone angry." Grumbled Xaria. "Just don't call me bumble bee, got it?"

"Don't worry; I think your hair means danger rather than bumble bee anyway." Said Oscar.

"Getting back to our goal; if Oscar is going to be our spearheader to vanquish the opposition, what will the rest of us do?" Asked Mable.

"Maybe w-we could outnumber lone o-o-opponents and o-overwhelm them." Suggested Raven shyly.

"That's a good idea Raven." Said Lavender with a smile. "What other good ideas do you have I wonder?"

"Just enough." Mumbled Raven.

"I wonder where Kasimar and Wallace got off to." Asked Mable aloud.

"Heck if I know … and do you really care about them?" Asked Oscar.

"Good point." Agreed Mable.

* * *

**Confessional- Point of a pencil?**

**Raven: I like t-to think I'm a-a-above a-a-average in my intelligence … b-b-but I don't l-l-like attention too much. But c-c-contributing to the t-team … felt good.**

**Oscar: This is gonna be my kind of challenge; I can put my strength to good use, it'll be like David and goliath in human snooker form.**

**Lavender: Red … red … not bad; I bet some of you out there think my name is ironic considering how I dress as well as my hair. Maybe we could come first again this time? Winning is always fun … and it'll be one step closer to my goal of proving the dumb cheerleader stereotype wrong.**

**Mable: Carton is afraid of garden gnomes? Oh boy, if we have a gardening challenge he won't stop screaming.** (She sighs)

* * *

**(Team Jungle)**

"_Drink cyanide and change your lives tide! Heheheheheh_" Laughed Uzuri's freaky emo doll. As usual a few of her team mates were a little freaked out.

"Uzuri; do you think you could possibly put the doll away for a moment?" Asked Yessica in discomfort.

"But why? She's not going to snap your spine in forty seven different places." Smiled Uzuri. "But if it makes you feel better I'll resist the want to pull the string again."

Uzuri put the doll down on a rock and smiled innocently. Tabitha had seem to become the team's leader as pretty much all the others followed her leadership without complaint. She cleared her throat and began to speak.

"Ok everyone; we may be at a slight disadvantage due to the last challenge; but I have a feeling today could be our first victory." Said Tabitha in a way that was very motivational. "We may have lost Fifi … but mark my words we will rise again starting today!"

"You said it Tabitha." Cheered Irene. "This challenge will be ours"

"But we'll need a strategy won't we?" Asked Gary.

"That we will." Said Tabitha with an affirmative nod. "And I happen to have one. Want to hear it?"

"Lay your plan of ultimate victory upon us." Said Hector as he scratched an itch on his ear.

"Very well; my strategy is to go for the fastest members of the others teams; that means Oscar and Lavender as they are the fittest physically and are on the team that won last time. So basically we'll pick off Tea Grenade from fastest to slowest. Any objections?" Finished Tabitha as she looked over her team.

"I think it's a good idea." Said Vinnie with a thumbs up from his organic arm. "But maybe Hector should go after Oscar because as he's the biggest he won't be pushed away as much by Oscar's strength. No offense Hector."

"None taken buddy." Shrugged Hector.

"Then it's settled." Said Tabitha with a hand clap. "We'll go from fastest to slowest on Team Grenade."

"But what if somebody from Team Puzzle gets in the way?" Asked Irene.

"Then do to them what you'd do to Team Grenade." Said Tabitha. "Though we're targeting Team Grenade you should knock somebody into the holes if you have a chance."

"What if we lose? Who should we vote off?" Asked Yessica.

"I have a good idea." Said Irene as she pointed to Vinnie who looked at his feet. "I still think he should have gone instead of Fifi."

"I thought I'd already convinced you that Vinnie didn't do it." Said Tabitha with an exasperated sigh. "I've listed the facts and evidence; it could have been Chris as we all know he cares nothing for us."

"But he did get pretty mad at Fifi." Said Yessica with crossed arms.

"I do have a name." Said Vinnie. "And honestly; I really didn't dig the hole. I actually can't use a shovel if my life depended on it."

"You see?" Smiled Tabitha. "He admits my theory, now can we put this pointless grudge to rest?"

"Ok, I guess." Said Yessica.

"If you insist … but who did dig the hole if it wasn't Vinnie?" Asked Irene.

"I suspect it may have been another camper; Chris was nowhere near us at the time and you'd have to be pretty … unintelligent, to trap one of your own team." Said Hector with a finger to his chin.

"Good idea Hector, maybe it was someone else … how will we punish them? Put vinegar on their cuts or trap their hands in a vice? Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

"Err … tone down the punishments a notch." Said Hector with unease.

"Or two." Added Gary.

* * *

**Confessional- Or three!**

**Tabitha: Now that Vinnie knows I've helped him he'll be in my debt; he'll be a fine help … until I don't need him anymore at which point it's buh bye for pinchy.**

**Uzuri: I wonder why people keep getting creeped out by me. Maybe they're just a little nervous? If they just gave me a little chance they'd have so much fun; more fun than burning ants! Teehee!**

**Hector: Uzuri is interesting … and at the same time completely terrifying. That doll of hers is a little weird, but her ideas of punishments are a bit on the crazy side. But still; she's my team mate so I should be nice. And this challenge might be easy and fun; finally my weight will come in handy.**

* * *

**(Wallace and Kasimar)**

Wallace and Kasimar, the gruesome twosome, were looking around at the balls that the three teams would be using. The balls were about two meters in all dimensions and were all one of three colors; seven were brown, eight were green and the final eight were orange. Wallace was thinking about something and gradually an evil smile was appearing on his face.

"So; why are we up here? Are we making testicle jokes or something? Not my style, sexist and politically incorrect jokes are funnier." Said Kasimar as he leant against a girder.

"That they are my right hand man; but we're not here for jokes … we're here to cheat!" Grinned Wallace insidiously. "The way I see it the green balls belong to our team as no other team has a connection to green. Furthermore since there are seven brown balls they belong to Team jungle. The orange ones must therefore belong to Team Puzzle."

"Your point?" Asked Kasimar.

"We must avoid the green balls as they belong to our team." Explained Wallace. "Therefore we must target the orange or brown balls. We could either begin to weaken Team Puzzle ... or completely *annihilate* Team Jungle! Mwuhahahahahaha"

"So which do we go for … and when do I get to hurt someone; my fists are itching for a pounding." Said Wallace as he punched his strong fists together.

"Simple; we target Team Puzzle; they are our biggest opposition and must suffer the consequences! Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically as he ran to the section of the platform that contained the orange balls with Kasimar following.

They soon reached the orange balls; they were quite bright, like a marble. Wallace approached one of them and opened the entry hatch. He then took out a red packet of a sort of dusty substance.

"Is that what I think it is?" Asked Kasimar with an evil smile.

"If you think it is itching powder then you are correct." Said Wallace as he poured all of the packets contents into the sphere. "Whoever gets this ball will be unable to do anything because of the terrible itch! Mwahahahaha!"

"I would have gone for something a bit more painful like flesh eating nematodes." Said Kasimar while cracking his knuckles. "But if you're sure it works…"

"Trust me my right hand man, it will not fail. And if I used nematodes then they would never be able to attempt to get revenge on me; now quickly, back to our team before anyone sees us."

Wallace dashed away down the hidden steps that led up from the ground while Kasimar rolled his eyes before following.

"He's completely crazy … but if it helps me hurt someone, then so be it." Said Kasimar with a demonic smile.

* * *

**Confessional- Wallace and Gromit … err … Kasimar.**

**Kasimar: Itching powder … is Wallace a kid or something? He may be evil but I take evil up to eleven. This won't be such a hard challenge; and if I'm lucky I can make ferret girl and the blond kid cry. Yahahahahahaha!**

**Wallace: I'm such a villain; all future bad guys will hail me as the father of evil and wickedness! This contest will be mine! Mwahahahahahahahahaha! And my evil laughter is perfect as well; I'm so evil!**

* * *

**(Not much later; all teams)**

Twenty minutes had gone by since Chris had left for his Latté and thus the challenge was about to begin. The three teams, now joined by Wallace and Kasimar, stood before the giant snooker table. Chris had returned and stood on a raised platform about two feet above the campers. Maybe the extra height bolstered his ego and made him feel supreme, or maybe he wanted to be taller. In any case he was going to tell the campers it was time for the challenge.

"Attention all twenty three not as good as me people; it's time for the challenge." Said Chris very arrogantly. "As you know, you must knock the other teams into the holes; anything is allowed as there are pretty much nil rules. And why not? Foul play makes for drama! Haha!"

"Do you even care about the badness that could result from a lack of rules?" Asked Lavender. "Do you ever feel remorse or sympathy?"

"Sometimes but I just ignore it until it leaves me. Now let's get this challenge started. Team Puzzle gets the orange balls, Team jungle gets the green ones and that leaves the brown balls for Team Jungle. Any questions; your opinion is important to me." Said Chris.

A few hands went up but Chris smiled sadistically.

"No questions? Wonderful! Everyone go up the elevators that have your team icon on them and get into your team's balls." Ordered Chris before instantly realizing what he said.

Most guys and a fair few girls fell down laughing much to Chris's embarrassment. Jimmy cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"What's so funny?" He asked in puzzlement.

* * *

**Confessional- Great balls of fire!**

**Jimmy: I don't get it; why does everyone laugh when Chris says the word 'balls'; everyone's seen a soccer ball right? It must be a teen thing or something.**

**Andy: That was funny and all, very funny indeed. But it's only a matter of time before Jimmy asks about it. That won't be pretty.**

* * *

"Ok; whatever. It's not that funny!" Whined Chris angrily. "The point is that each team has one set of … spheres; now go and get in them!"

The campers quickly stopped laughing and boarded the elevators that would take them to their … capsules. Carlton looked white as a sheet; he really seemed scared.

"What is it this time Carlton?" Asked Xaria with a sigh. "Don't tell me you're afraid of elevators."

"Yes I am." Whimpered Carlton. "That and spheres; this whole show is one big nightmare and I can't wake up!"

"Carlton; I mean this nicely … get a grip! You're like what, sixteen? And you're as fearful as a baby. Just chill." Said Xaria with another sigh. "And don't try to run int a hole to escape the challenge either; we need you whether we like it or not."

Carlton was silent as the elevator continued up. A small wet patch appeared on his pants. Xaria flinched and backed away in disgust.

* * *

**Confessional- He wet his pants; what … a … wuss.**

**Carlton: I wanna go home and into my room. This horrible island is so scary.**

**Xaria: I'm not even going to say anything … ok, I will. I think I know who I'll vote for if we lose; nothing personal at all, it's just that he really doesn't belong here.**

* * *

The three teams climbed into their respective balls (not THOSE ball you pervs!) and the hatches shut. They rolled towards the ramp and stopped just before it. The intercom turned on and they all heard Chris's voice.

"Ok everyone; time to have a ball! And try to cause drama. Three … two … one … … … GOOOOO!" Yelled Chris at the top of his lungs.

Each member of each of the three teams ran forwards and down the ramps at full speed; they reached the end of the ramp and flew into the air.

"Wooooohooo!" Cheered Barney as he become airborne and went higher than everyone else.

* * *

**Confessional- I want to fly! Badly!**

**Barney: If only pirates could fly arrr … that would make a good movie y'know. Yo ho!"**

* * *

The balls landed on the ground with a great many hard slams. Everyone started moving about trying to bump into their foes. Oscar ran full speed towards Gary and sent him flying into the wall and off his feet.

"Ow!" Cried Gary as he stood back up. "How am I supposed to beat a muscle man like you?"

"Simple." Replied Oscar confidently. "You can't."

Oscar rammed into Gary again and sent him near a hole. Gary got up again and saw Oscar coming for him and knew he had lost. But he hadn't.

All of a sudden Jimmy zoomed forwards and slammed into Oscar; Oscar was knocked over by the sudden change in momentum and turned to Jimmy once back on his feet.

"Nice one little guy; but not nice enough."

Oscar tried to ram Jimmy but the kid quickly moved away. Oscar looked where he had been and paled; Kasimar was charging at quite an impressive speed and seemed unable to stop.

"Oh crad." Sighed Oscar as Kasimar collided with him which sent them falling down and into the wall.

Gary watched the hole thing and smiled.

"That was fortunate." Smiled Gary as he ran towards Carlton and knocked him over.

* * *

**Confessional- WHAM! Collision detected.**

**Kasimar: I guess I messed up back there; I was aiming for the little rat but he moved. Good thing nobody on my team ended up in a hole. Besides; I'll get that kid one way … or another.**

* * *

Nakia had started to slow down; for some reason she was starting to itch all over. She scratched her hip and it itched even more. Her feet were unpleasantly tingly and even her perfect hair was on fire with itchiness.

"Arrrgh!" Screamed Nakia. "Why am I so itchy? What's going on? AAAAARGH!"

Nakia ran around erratically while scratching all over; she swerved in and out of her team mates.

"Hey!" Said Andy as Nakia bumped into him. "I'm on your team!"

Nakia didn't hear him due to the overwhelming itchiness she was experiencing. She zoomed into a wall and bounced off; right into Spider.

"Ouch! I'm gonna *cough* be *cough* feeling that tomorrow." Groaned Spider as he stood back up.

Carlton was near a hole, slowly walking around while keeping an eye out for other people. He let out a sigh of relief; he was unnoticed and completely safe.

WHAM!

Or not…

Nakia had slammed into Carlton and sent him backwards down the hole; he screamed as he fell down and out of the snooker table. He ended up in a small corral. A second later Nakia whacked into him and both fell over.

"Safe … at last." Said Carlton with a smile.

"Why am I so itchy?" Shrieked Nakia.

(**Eliminated; Carlton and Nakia)**

* * *

**Confessional- Scratch that itch!**

**Nakia: The interns identified that itching power caused me to scratch like that; when I find out who did it I'll KILL them for damaging my hair!**

* * *

Lavender ran towards Yessica with full force; she was send rolling forwards and down a hole.

"Alright! One down; many to go." Smiled Lavender as she ran towards Irene; as she collided the tree hugger was sent backwards and into a wall.

"Oh you'll pay for that one Lavender." Taunted Irene as she got back up again.

The two ran towards each other but before they could make contact Spider ran between them. Both girls were unable to stop and because of the angle they hit him both were sent flying and down a hole.

"Sorry *cough* girls." Apologized Spider as Kasimar rammed into him.

The three eliminated girls were helped out of their balls by some interns and sighed bitterly.

"This is awful." Groaned Lavender. "I'm out so early; I'll be a prime candidate for elimination if my team loses.

"You might not be." Said Yessica. "You got me and Irene into the holes which is more than a lot of your team mates will do."

"I can only hope; being the fourth voted off would be pretty bad." Said Lavender with a small smile.

"Well think of it this way." Said Yessica kindly. "In the unlikely event you are vote4d off you would have outlasted Daisy, Patch and Fifi."

"I guess you're right." Smiled Lavender.

"Woohoo, that was fun!" Cheered Irene. "Let's do it again!"

"I'd rather not." Said Yessica. "Falling down the holes gives my stomach an unpleasant feeling."

CRASH!

Another ball rolled into the ball corral and smacked into the empty balls. The hatch opened and out climbed Andy, he looked a little dazed.

"Are you ok Andy?" Asked Lavender with concern.

"I'll be fine." Shrugged Andy. "Oscar slammed me full force and I fell down the hole flipping over all the way."

"Well, he is our secret weapon." Smirked Lavender.

"Maybe so, but it's not over yet." Declared Andy. "Now if you'll excuse me, since the challenge is over for me I'm going to go and read one of my space comic books."

And with that Andy left for the cabins … though he seemed unable to walk in a straight line.

"Think he'll be ok Irene?" Asked Yessica.

"He'll live." Said Yessica as she straightened out her hair.

**(Eliminated; Lavender, Andy, Yessica and Irene).**

* * *

**Confessional: Comic books? Does he know comic book guy?**

**Andy: That challenge wasn't too bad … though I now know to steer clear of Oscar when he is bull rushing. And besides; it gives me some quality time with my comic books.**

**Lavender: I may have lost early … but with Oscar on the team I think we'll be safe from elimination … and if not, then I guess … I'm out. Have faith Lavender, have faith.**

* * *

Quana ran down the length of the snooker table to pick up speed for a hard ram; thanks to yoga lessons she was able to stay standing due to flexibility. She quickly looked for a target and spotted Gary nearby.

"Perfect." Said Quana. "Prepare to fry chef boy!"

Gary turned and had no time to move out of the way; in an instant he was bowled over and sent spinning around right next to a hole."

"Time for the finishing move." Said Quana as she cleared her throat and began to sing. "_Well Gary, not much can be said, your ball isn't made of lead and your chances of victory are dead_!"

Quana ran forwards towards Gary but she quickly slowed down. An instant later Jimmy ran past and he looked panicked, a moment later she saw why. Kasimar was chasing him at a very fast speed and looked quite bloodthirsty, a bit like the nemesis in resident evil three when Jill first met it.

"Come back here you little worm!" Yelled Kasimar as he ran after Jimmy; on the way he hit Quana and due to Kasimar's heavier weight compared to Quana's light frame she was sent flying.

"Waaah!" Screamed Quana as she was bounced around inside her ball.

Just ahead Raven lightly bumped into Barney; Barney was about to return the bump but he glanced to the side and his blue eyes widened.

"Cannon ball on the horizon me heartie!" Yelled Barney as he sped out of the way.

Raven wasn't as quick and Quana slammed into her; she ricocheted away, bumped off Wallace and fell into a hole.

"Yee haw!" Whooped Quana as she ran onwards to try and find another person to eliminate.

* * *

**(Eliminated; Raven)**

**Confessional- I could sing if I had a mouth.**

**Quana: That was really exciting; I hope Raven wasn't to hurt … naw, these … spheres, are quite safe aren't they? In any case I really enjoyed the challenge. Maybe human snooker should be in the Olympics; what do you think?**

**Raven: I don't t-t-think I'll ever l-look at snooker the s-s-same way e-ever again.**

* * *

It was a showdown like in the Wild West; Hector and Xaria stood at opposite ends of the snooker table arena and stared each other in the eyes. A ram was impending.

"For math!" Bellowed Hector as he started running.

"For the few things I don't hate." Said Xaria without any enthusiasm whatsoever as she also began running.

They were perfectly aligned with each other; with every passing second they were getting nearer to collision. They were now les than fifteen meters apart, any second they would collide!

WHAM!

Hector and Xaria smashed into one another and were sent flying from each other at quite a high speed. Xaria went up yet she stayed standing as she span in mid air and landed perfectly.

"Is that all you've got?" She asked.

A distance away Hector had landed quite hard and was dazed on the ground. He groaned in a little pain and he tried to get back to his feet.

"This feels as unpleasant as a chronic brain freeze;; OW!" Groaned Hector as he got to his feet.

At the very second he got up Mable rammed into him and sent him down one of the holes, one that had been a mere meter away.

"Avenge meeeeeeeee!" Cried Hector as he fell down the hole.

"Nice landed Xaria." Called Mable with the thumbs up.

"Yeah … I guess it was … very mildly fun." Shrugged Xaria as she continued running so as not to remain a sitting duck.

Nearby Mable Spider was running at a slow pace; he had gotten a stitch from all the running and was feeling queasy … not that this was really unexpected.

"Oh biscuits." Bewailed Spider as he gasped for air. "Why *sneeze* do I have to *cough* be so sick all *gag* he time? I mustn't puke or *cough* it'll go everywhere thanks to the *cough* rolling."

Spider stopped and panted a few deep breaths. He reached into his pocket and took out an inhaler and breathed deeply with it. A moment later Spider pocketed it and looked ahead.

"Oh shi … toki mushrooms!" Meeped Spider.

He backed up but a moment later Mable crashed into him full speed; and this is Mable we're talking about, she's in great shape indeed. Thus the force … was hard.

Spider shot backwards very quickly and right into a wall; he then rebounded and smashed back into Mable while keeping momentum. He and Mable both sailed speedily backwards into a hole and out of the game.

**(Eliminated; Hector, Mable and Spider).**

* * *

**Confessional- Bad luck, I do think so.**

**Mable: That … was so unlucky; why didn't I realize he would rebound off the wall at the speed he was going? At least Oscar is still in the game.**

* * *

Spider and Mable exited their balls, err, I mean spheres! They exited the ball Corral and turned to each other.

"Sorry about *sneeze* that." Said Spider with a sniffle. "Looks like both our teams are one person down.

"I guess." Sighed Mable. "I was hoping to win; that would be good, a winning streak this early would be invaluable for my team."

"There's always *hard double cough* next time." Said Spider as he coughed.

"I don't want to be mean but do you mind not coming to close." Asked Mable. "No offense but I don't want to get your germs."

"I understand, don't *cough* worry." Shrugged Spider as he backed a few steps away.

"YOU IDIOT!" Yelled a voice from nearby. Spider turned to see who it was and gulped.

Nakia was storming towards him and looked _pissed_. She stopped in front of him and snarled.

"Well; I'm waiting." Said Nakia swiftly.

"Waiting for *cough* what?" Asked Spider in confusion.

"For you to ask me to forgive you of course." Replied Nakia meanly.

"For what?" Asked Spider. "Because I fell *gag* down a hole"

"Exactly; thanks to you we're that much closer to losing." Growled Nakia. "I knew that you and your bad hair would be deadweight to this team."

"You can't win them all." Said Spider in an attempt to be brave,. "You win some; you lose some, nobodies perfect."

"You certainly aren't." Snapped Nakia. "If we lose it's the boat of losers for you and your split ends."

Nakia stormed off while Spider sighed in sadness.

"Well; I knew I wasn't going to get very far bit I didn't think I'd lose this early." Lamented Spider.

"I wouldn't pay any attention to her Spider." Suggested Mable kindly. "I find the fact she thinks her nasty attitude won't backfire on her to be funny; she'll get her karma eventually … and you're team may not lose."

"Thanks, Mable, is it?"

"That's me." Nodded Mable.

"Well thanks." Said Spider with the faintest of smiles.

* * *

**Confessional- If I agreed with you then we'd both be wrong.**

**Nakia: Spider is not only a reminder of the worst creatures that roam this earth but he has bad hair, yuck! But, I agree with Mable, we may not lose … but if we do? Bring out the arachnid swatter if you know what I mean.**

**Spider: I can't help my** *cough*** bad hair; it's because of my ***sneeze*** illnesses. If I wasn't so sick I bet I'd be *** pained groan*** handsome, that would be *cough* nice. **(Spider sighs and looks into space).

* * *

"Darn it!" Yelled Zita as she was knocked into a hole by Xaria. "I'll remember this!"

"Too bad, too sad." Grumbled Xaria as she ran onwards. Just up ahead she saw Quana knocking Wallace around; despite not particularly liking Wallace, at all, Xaria didn't want to lose so she ran forwards at a high speed as usual in the game towards Quana.

"Incoming." Said Xaria dryly.

Quana turned and yelped; she was hit hard by Xaria and knocked down one of the corner holes. Xaria nodded contently to herself as she had knocked the remaining Team Puzzle members down to three.

"You're fast for a rat arnt'cha!" Yelled a mean demonic voice from nearby.

Xaria turned and wasn't surprised with what she saw; Kasimar was chasing Jimmy down. Now that Xaria thought about it she didn't recall Kasimar going for anyone else the whole challenge. Jimmy looked really tired and was zig zagging wearily inside his ball. Xaria had to hand it to the kid; he was a fast runner.

"Why are you chasing me?" Asked Jimmy. "You haven't stopped in more than ten minutes!"

"That's what bullies do runt!" Replied Kasimar gruffly. "We go for the weakest people, the ones who cry easy and cannot beat us! Yahahaha!"

Jimmy was gasping for air; he had run long distances back home during his misadventures with his friends but this was beyond his endurance level.

"_What am I gonna do_?" Though Jimmy to himself in worry. "_If that guy catches me he's going to really hurt me, I don't like pain_!"

A moment later Jimmy saw a hole nearby; he knew he had to get Kasimar down it, but the bully was bigger and stringer than him. Jimmy thought as he ran and hatched a plan.

"_He's bigger and stronger … but maybe he isn't smarter…_." Though Jimmy as he Ran to the hole and stopped in front of it. Jimmy gasped for breath and turned to face Kasimar.

Kasimar stood a short distance away and bared his unnaturally sharp teeth. He revved on the spot like a bull and charged.

"Eat this runt!" Roared Kasimar as he charged towards Jimmy at a high speed.

Jimmy waited for a moment and dived to the side; his ball rolled with him and gave clear entrance to the hole. Kasimar saw what Jimmy had done and tried to stop, alas, he was going to fast and fell down the hole.

"AARGH! #Bleep# #Bleep# #Bleep# and even an almighty triple #Super Bleep #!" Screamed Kasimar in fury as he fell.

"He seems pretty mad." Shivered Jimmy in worry. "I wonder what those words mean. But I beat him! Yes!"

Jimmy started doing a victory dance, the very same one the toons in Toontown do when they win a fight.

"Sorry about this kid." Said Xaria as she ran up at a speed.

One bam later Jimmy was knocked into the hole and fell down and out of the game.

"Nice kid." Said Xaria with a shrug. "But about as aware of his surroundings as a sack of potatoes."

**(Eliminated; Zita, Quana, Kasimar and Jimmy)**

* * *

**Confessional- Beat the Bully.**

**Kasimar: That little rat! He made me fall for the oldest trick in the book! I'll get even with him … and I'll wring his scrawny little NECK!**

**Jimmy: I guess I probably should have paid more attention to my surroundings; but I did pretty good right? Just gotta keep a positive outlook on life. **

* * *

Tabitha and Uzuri ran side by side along the arena; half of their Team was gone yet both other teams had only three members left, at this rate they would take first place. Up ahead was Gary, he'd lasted a fair while but was currently in a bumping duel with Eleanor … and surprisingly Eleanor was winning … but it could have something to do with Gary not having steady footing in his ball.

"I think we should help our team mate." Said Tabitha seriously.

"Too late." Said Uzuri.

"Take this!" Battle cried Eleanor as she bumped Gary one last time and sent him falling down a hole.

* * *

**(Eliminated; Gary)**

**Confessional: Gordon Ramsey's kitchen nightmare up to eleven!**

**Gary: I just couldn't keep my balance in that ball, I don't really have a good sense of balance, and it's why I stink at sports. But I lasted a fair while so I think it's fair to say I have a good chance to get to the next day.**

**Tabitha: And there went our advantage; though as what happened next proves, sometimes the world gives you a Freebie.**

* * *

Wallace was in a particularly evil mood; he wanted to cause some evil mayhem. He hadn't knocked anyone down a hole yet and he felt like he was letting evil villains down all over the world.

"Who can I knock into the holes? Not many left now, but I need a target … aha! The turtle hat girl! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically as he sped towards Eleanor and grinned evilly. But as all you readers out there will know; what goes around comes around.

Wallace lost his footing due to the speed he was going at and thus he tripped and continued rolling erratically towards Eleanor.

"Watch out me heartie!" Called Barney as he and Vinnie bumped each other.

Eleanor didn't react in time; Barney hadn't warned her fast enough. Wallace crashed into her and both of them fell down a hole which bought the total amount of players down to seven.

**(Eliminated; Eleanor and Wallace)**

* * *

**Confessional- Head over heels.**

**Wallace: Nooooooooooo! What a world, how could a simple trip defeat someone as evil as me? I must repent my sin with more evil! I shall avenge my failed evil deed! Mwahahahaha!**

**Eleanor: You ever get the feeling someone has laughed evilly in here recently? I think I did ok though I only got one person down a hole. But it could be worse. With me gone though, it left only Quana and Barney for Team Puzzle.**

* * *

"I'll never give up!" Said Vinnie as Barney knocked him backwards.

"High deck on the low deck my friend!" Grinned Barney while Vinnie raised an eyebrow at the lack of sense the sentence made.

Vinnie and Barney rammed towards each other and ran alongside one another towards the corner. Barney gave Vinnie a hard nudge and sent him careening right towards the hole.

"At least I gave it a go." Shrugged Vinnie as he fell down the hole.

"The pirate wins again!" Cheered Barney as he swooped his hat down in a bow before running towards the others.

**(Eliminated; Vinnie)**

* * *

**Confessional- Booty get!**

**Barney: Yaaar! This sea dog feels satisfied with his results. Snooker is always fun back home but human snooker is even better!**

* * *

Oscar still had a fair amount of energy left and proved this by ramming into Tabitha.

"Watch it muscle boy!" Yelled Tabitha.

"Sorry blue lips; but all's fair in snooker and war, or something like that. You're going down!"

Oscar charged forwards at speed and knocked Tabitha back. As Tabitha sailed back she whacked into Quana and sent her down a hole. Tabitha however managed to stop herself from suffering the same fate.

"It'll take more than that to beat me trophy boy." Taunted Tabitha as she dashed away from the hole.

Tabitha rammed into Oscar and sent him back; Oscar quickly recovered however and returned the slam.

"Eat pure muscle!" Boomed Oscar as Tabitha was sent back and very near the hole again.

"You'll never beat me Oscar." Smiled Tabitha falsely and foully.

"I don't plan to." Replied Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional- Neither do I.**

**Tabitha: I should have understood the meaning of that sentence quicker, curse my drifting attention span.**

* * *

Tabitha raised an eyebrow and pondered the meaning of Oscar's sentence. She didn't have time to think as a second later Xaria rammed into her and sent her down the hole.

"It's up to you Uzuri!" Cried Tabitha urgently as she fell out of the game.

"Who's next?" Asked Oscar as though he felt nothing could go wrong.

"You yaaar!" Yelled a piratey voice

Oscar turned and his small dot eyes widened a little.

WHACK!

Oscar was knocked over and off his feet and rolled to the edge of the hole and started to slowly but surely over the edge.

"No! No! Aw crad!" Yelled Oscar as he fell down the hole leaving one member for each Team left in the game.

**(Eliminated; Tabitha and Oscar)**

* * *

Barney, Xaria and Uzuri stared at each other. They circled around each other like pirate ships on a medieval sea.

"Yo ho!" Roared barney as he ran towards Xaria.

"Not so fast." Replied Xaria flatly as she side stepped out of the way before chasing after Barney.

"Oh don't run away." Pleaded Uzuri as she chased after them. "I'm not going to strangle you until your legs go limp! Teehee!"

The chase was on with Barney in the lead. Their speed was high and the chances of stopping low. Xaria was gaining on the pirate; it would only be a matter of time before she caught up.

"Slow down pirate boy; I just want to talk to you." Said Xaria smoothly.

Barney turned his head around and made a face at Xaria.

"You'll have to catch me first~!" Replied Barney.

BAM!

Barney crashed into the wall and fell to the ground as his ball slowly rolled along.

"This has been fun; but the ache in my legs in a tad uncomfortable." Grumbled Xaria as she bumped Barney into a hole.

"Eat ball Xaria!" Giggled Uzuri as she ran towards Xaria. Xaria raised an eyebrow and casually stepped backwards thus moving herself and her ball out of the way.

Uzuri slowed down and ended up balancing on the edge of the hole.

"Well; second place isn't too bad; nicely played Xaria." Congratulated Uzuri as she fell down the hole.

"Well would you look at that, I won." Said Xaria with a small smile.

* * *

**(Eliminated; Barney and Uzuri)**

**(Winner; Xaria and Team Grenade)**

* * *

**Confessional; An explosive victory for an explosive team.**

**Xaria: What can I say? I'm just good on my feet.**

**Uzuri: Xaria won fairly and despite not getting first place me and my team are safe from elimination. I think I did prety good. Teehee!**

* * *

A little while later Xaria was back on level ground and everyone was out of their spheres and were able to walk in a straight line again. Chris stood at the front of the crowd of twenty three campers and smiled his signature smile.

"Well everyone; that was a good challenge, it's sure to bring in ratings. I especially like how Kasimar chased Jimmy; nothing like a good old game of cat and mouse to excite the viewers. Haha!"

Jimmy looked away so as to avoid Kasimar's evil gaze.

"But now it is time for the results; Xaria was the last on the snooker table, as such Team Grenade are once again the winners. Uzuri fell down a hole so obviously didn't win … … but she stayed on Longer than Barney which makes Team Puzzle the losers of the challenge! Sucks to be you guys! Haha!"

The eight members of Team Puzzle collectively sighed. They were on the chopping block and would have a disadvantage next time due to the smaller team number they would have.

"And as Team Grenade came first they get a special prize. This time the special first place prize is...

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A set of tie dyed cloths!

While Mable looked satisfied Kasimar certainly wasn't.

"What the hell of a kind of prize is that garbage old man?" Asked Kasimar rudely.

"A very good one … if you're a hippy." Laughed Chris. "So in conclusion you know the winners and you know the losers, I'll be seeing Team Puzzle at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony in one hour, see you later losers."

And with that Chris left to get a latté and the teams dispersed to do other things. Team Puzzle looked amongst themselves nervously.

"So … who should we vote off?" Asked Jimmy hesitantly.

"Whoever will be the least use to the team." Said Quana. "And I know exactly who that might be."

"Me too." Said Nakia. "It's clear we've got to get rid of Spider."

"But why?" Asked Andy.

"Because he has the worst hair; we can't have him slowing everyone down." Explained Nakia smugly. "In this world we live in we must only keep the very best … which Spider isn't.

"I really don't think that *cough* my hair will have much effect on the *gag* challenges." Said Spider.

"You may think that; but we don't." Replied Nakia. "Now I'm sorry to cut this short but I've got a vote to cast."

Nakia left to the confessional while the remaining seven Puzzle's looked amongst each other again.

"I'll be in the cabin if you *cough* need me." Said Spider. "Come get me when *hard gag* I have to cast my vote."

Spider left to the cabin while the other six looked uncertain for a moment.

"I don't know about you guys." Said Quana boldly. "But I've had it with Nakia putting Spider and a few others down just because of their hair. I've decided who I'm voting for."

* * *

**Confessional- Vote for the president … of loserville.**

**Nakia: Spider has to go; his hair is a real eyesore for my eyes. He should be thankful I'm getting rid of him before people begin to hate him.**

**Jimmy: I don't really like to hold grudges … but I think the person who get's my vote deserves it.**

**Quana: Nakia … you're finished. You seemed nice at first but upon getting to know you I've really grown a strong dislike for both you and your stupid hair.**

**Spider: I'm used to this type** *cough*** of thing; nobody likes hanging around with ***cough*** the sick kid. I've packed my stuff so that'll save the interns ***sneeze* **some time. But hey; it wasn't so bad ***cough*** being here really, I made a few friends. But as for ***cough*** my vote? I vote for Nakia.**

* * *

An hour later it had gone dark and the eight members of Team Puzzle were seated on the logs and stumps around the Bonfire Ceremony area. Quana was glaring at Nakia but she seemed to not notice as she was occupied with brushing her hair. Eleanor was gazing at a nearby owl that hooted every now and then. Spider was silent though let out the occasional sneeze.

Chris arrived with a trap of seven marshmallows and looked upon the members of Tea Puzzle with a shake of his head.

"Well, well Team Puzzle, it seems that you've lost the challenge. What went wrong?" Asked Chris. "You all seemed to work well together last time. But in just a few moments one of you will be out. You will notice that I have seven marshmallows, these marshmallows represent safety. When I call your name come and get a marshmallow. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back … *ever*."

"I think we all know who's going to be out." Said Nakia with a mean smile.

"We sure do." Grinned Quana.

"The first person safe is Barney." Said Chris as he held up the first marshmallow.

"Arrr! I'm not walking the plank tonight!" Smiled Barney widely.

"The second person through is Jimmy."

"Thanks for not voting for me." Smiled Jimmy as he claimed his tasty treat.

"Quana"

"Eleanor"

"Andy"

"Zita"

Only Nakia and Spider remained without a marshmallow while Spider hung his head and gulped Nakia on the other hand looked very confident.

"The person leaving tonight got a lot of votes; seven out of eight people on the team voted for them. The final marshmallow of your first ceremony goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Spider."

Spider looked very surprised but smiled and walked to get his marshmallow. He did looked quite shocked he was safe.

Nakia stood rooted to her stump and looked horrified and way stunned. She started to clench her teeth in anger.

"Well Nakia; it's the end of your stay on Wawanakwa." Said Chris not too sadly. "Though I admit you have nice hair; it wasn't enough. You were men, selfish and shallow and most of all … you're outta here!"

Nakia stood up and snarled at her Team mates.

"You all voted for me?" She asked in mean amazement. "Why?"

"Because we don't like you." Said Zita Flatly.

"You bullied us about because of our hair." Said Quana sternly.

"Sorry … but I don't really like you." Said Jimmy with a disapproving shake of his head.

"I'll make you all sorry!" Growled Nakia. "Especially you Spider."

Nakia angrily marched away from the Bonfire Ceremony area, walked the dock of shame and boarded the boat of losers. She was gone within the minute.

"I'm … safe *cough*?" Said Spider in wonder.

"Well we wouldn't vote you off silly." Smiled Quana warmly. "You're much nicer than Nakia."

"Seriously; Spiders rules and Nakia drools." Chuckled Andy.

"Well you seven." Interrupted Chris. "You're all safe … for now. Who knows what tomorrow will bring, victory … or another defeat? You are free to leave to your cabin."

The remaining seven members of Team Puzzle left for bed; it had been a long day but with Nakia gone it would be a good night's sleep that awaited them.

"And thus ends day three." Said Chris to the camera. "Nakia and her perfect hair are gone and Team Grenade is the only Team still with all eight members. What will happen next time? Find out in the next thrilling episode of Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

**And that's all folks! Nakia is gone but I don't think she had many fans so I don't think I'll get any complaints.**

**Did you like the chapter, or did you hate it? Let me know in a review! I read every single review over and over and over.**

**CragmiteBlaster out.**


	7. Day 4, Part 1, With apologies to Santa

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total drama Island or any of its characters or seasons. I also do not own the alphabet them in this story, that belongs to Frank15. I do however own all 26 of the contestants.

**The Warning:** This story contains bullying, some love, bombs, evil laughter, crazy people and santa. Nothing M rated though.

**Pairings:** Not telling just yet.

**Note:** Hi everyone! It's time for day four; and it's christmas themed; originally it would have been a Wawanakwa version of 'find the needle in the haystack' but I scrapped it. Sometimes you've got to trim the fat. I hope you all enjoy this chapter; I had fun writing it, just like every chaper.

Let's rock and roll!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame on a surprisingly snowy Wawanakwa Island looking out at the sea; he turned to the camera and smiled his usual sadistic grin.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz! Day three started with a bang as the Teams were forced into spheres to play human snooker." Began Chris still with his signature smile. "Ratings came in fast thanks to our local bad guy Wallace; the dude put itching powder in one of Team Puzzle's ball, err, sphere! What a cool guy eh?"

Chris chuckled to himself before burping loudly.

"I knew I shouldn't have drunk so many latté's … but it can be edited out. Anyway; the challenge was thick and fast; people were sent flying and rolling everywhere; one by one they went down the giant snooker table's pockets. In the end it was a showdown between Barney, Uzuri and Xaria. Much to my surprise … Xaria won it for Team Grenade which was their second win over all."

Chris muttered something about losing twenty bucks in a bet before continuing.

"Team Puzzle were the losers and had to send one of their own off the island at their first Bonfire Ceremony; Nakia suggested Spider to his, agreeably, bad hair. But the others didn't like this, not one bit, probably hair envy, and voted Nakia off seven votes to one. I'll miss that girl, she could have given me some hair tips, but what's done is done."

Chris sighed regretfully and faced the camera face on.

"What will be the next challenge? Who will be the next voted off? And ho-ho-ho boy, will this show get any better? Find out right here, right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

Early morning had rolled around and it was fairly cold; for some abnormal reason snow had covered Wawanakwa in just one night. Very odd considering it was summer … but this is Chris Maclean we're talking about, he doesn't play by mother natures rules! If the campers looked out the windows of their cabins they might have been confused nut they had the curtains drawn tightly and thus saw not even a flake of snow.

* * *

**(Team Jungle, guys)**

Vinnie, Gary and Hector were still in bed and as a result weren't feeling too cold. Hector was working on his math's book and Gary was leafing through a cook book.

"I seriously doubt you'd get that much flavor with that little sauce." Mumbled Gary as he turned a page in his cook book.

"What recipe was that?" Asked Hector.

"Spaghetti Bolognese, Italian." Replied Gary. "This variation uses only thirty percent of the usual sauce. Seems a bit bland."

"I hear you." Confirmed Hector with a nod. "I prefer my food to have a bit of flavor, a smackeral of spice even."

"Maybe for today I'll cook something a little more tasty … how does spare beef ribs in barbecue sauce sound?"

"Very delightful." Said Hector as a small bit of drool formed at the corner of his mouth. "Can I expect a side of rice?"

"Expect it." Nodded Gary.

"Hey guys; does it feel at all cold to you?" Asked Vinnie. "I just can't shake the feeling of snow being nearby."

"It's probably your imagination." Reasoned Hector. "I doubt even Chris could mess with the weather."

* * *

**Confessional- Or could he?**

**Hector: Though it did feel a tad chilly once we got out of Bed, hhhmmmm.**

* * *

"Well; if you're sure." Shrugged Vinnie. "So … who's hoping Team Grenade will lose today?"

"I am." Said Hector. "While I hold no personal Vendetta to any of the individuals on that team, I think it would even the playing field if they lost. That way or teams would have the same amount of people."

"What if we lose again?" Asked Gary.

"Then God help us all." Sighed Hector as he completed another trigonometry problem.

"All we can do is our best." Said Vinnie positively. "And that somehow reminds me … I believe Tabitha has convinced the other girls that I didn't dig that hole. I owe her one."

"Tabitha is everything Heather is not." Agreed Gary. "Maybe we'll come first today."

"Who do you think dug the hole?" Asked Hector in deep thought. "I've been thinking that it might have been more than one person; that may explain how it was dug so deep in such a short space of time."

"We'll need some evidence to convict someone though." Reminded Gary. "If only we had a detective on our team."

* * *

**Confessional- Dig it, dig it good!**

**Vinnie: I think my innocence may soon be proved; that will take quite a weight off my shoulders. But then again … Fifi is still going to want to rip both my organic and metal arms off, I guess when … and if, I'm eliminated I could apologize. Until then I'll keep going.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle, girls)**

The four girls of Team Jungle were talking; more specifically they were strategizing. Tabitha was discussing plans for the team's victory with the others. Currently they were going over who they should vote off if they lost.

"I know it's going to be hard to say goodbye to your friends if they are eliminated but my idea is that we should vote for the person who costs us the challenge." Explained Tabitha. "That way there is no chance of that individual screwing up again."

"What if it was you who cost us the challenge?" Asked Irene nervously.

"Then I would accept my loss with dignity." Smiled Tabitha. "But there is one exception to this plan; if somebody on the team severely upsets or even hurts somebody else on this team … then goodbye to them."

"I guess that makes sense." Nodded Irene.

"What about when we get to the merge?" Asked Yessica. "They'll be no teams then."

Tabitha thought for a moment and snapped her fingers.

"Simple; all remaining members of the team will simply band together and vote as one."

"I vote for another emo doll phrase." Giggled Uzuri.

"Oh please no." Mumbled Yessica.

Too late; Uzuri pulled the string and the doll began speaking.

"_Sixty percent of suicides are successful; forty percent fail because people forget it's down the river, not across the street! Heheheheheh_" Laughed the doll as Yessica moved a distance away from Uzuri while shivering with wide eyes.

* * *

**Confessional- I have no pull string!**

**Yessica: That doll is really starting to scare me; it's gonna be the *death* of me at this rate! I can't ask Uzuri to get rid of it, she likes it too much … though how you like something like that abomination is beyond me!**

**Tabitha: That doll of Uzuri's is presenting a problem; either I get rid of the doll …** (she grins evilly)** or get rid of Yessica. Either option is pretty effective, if I get rid of the doll the Team is less scared … but Uzuri would be mortified and would look to me for help. Then again, if I get rid of Yessica I could stop the problem and keep my ally … at the cost of a lower Team member number. This could take some thought.** (Tabitha thinks deeply).

* * *

"Uzuri; you're … sort of my friend, but your doll is scaring me." Said Yessica. "Could you maybe, I don't know, put it away for a little while?"

"But I cant sleep without it." Explained Uzuri. "And besides; don't you have something that's really special to you?"

"She's got a point." Said Irene with a rapid triple nod. "Mine would be my bonsai tree back home, the first tree I ever planted."

"BANZAI!" Yelled Uzuri suddenly which made the others jump. "Did I make you jump? Hopefully I didn't make you're hearts explode into a pile of bodily shrapnel. Teehee!"

"I don't think Irene meant that type of Bonsai." Said Tabitha wearily but with a clever false smile. "Banzai is to impale yourself, something that you'd like knowing you, bonsai is a very small oriental tree. A fun fact about bonsai is that it's completely impossible to hang yourself off one. Gotta respect that."

"I respect all trees, big and small, smooth and prickly, fruit bearing and leafy." Smiled Irene.

"I'd respect the doll more if it wasn't staring at me." Shivered Yessica.

"I'll turn her away." Smiled Uzuri as she moved the doll to face herself. "Better?"

"Very much." Smiled Yessica gratefully. "Thank you."

* * *

**Confessional- I was made from a tree!**

**Tabitha: Maybe I won't have to do anything about the problem … but just in case… **(She winks to the camera).

**Uzuri: Tabitha is like the friend I always wished I had, she's a good leader and is full of fun! Believe it or not I don't really have that many friends back home … but that isn't going to get me down! Teehee!**

* * *

**(Team Grenade Guys)**

Oscar sighed as he stared at the ceiling; he hadn't gotten much sleep as usual. The amount of late nights he had spent exercising helped his endurance without sleep … but it was beginning to get on his nerves.

For the past twenty minutes Kasimar had been lurking below Carlton's bed and every fifteen seconds or so he would jump up and yell boo; this made Carlton scream. And worse still, Carlton's screams were very high pitched and felt like a dentist drill to the eardrum. Wallace was making no attempt to stop his henchman; if anything he looked fairly amused by it.

"Boo!" Yelled Kasimar once more, this time with waving arms.

"AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Carlton as he huddled up under his bed sheets.

"Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar. "Oh man, this never gets old. I hope you stay around a bit longer Carlton, you're so fun to scare."

"I hope I don't stay." Whimpered Carlton from under the sheets. "I don't even want to be here! Why can't I go home?"

"Boo!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

"Will you lay off him already you crap spackle?" Asked Oscar in irritation. "You're a complete monster you know; do your parents even love you?"

"Heck if I care." Shrugged Kasimar. "I don't care about them; I just care about causing pain. And Carlton is a great target when Jimmy isn't available."

"You're a coward." Snapped Oscar.

"What did you say?" Asked Kasimar in a deadly whisper.

"I called you a coward; why not bully someone who could put up a fight, like me!" Challenged Oscar.

"I'll take that question." Said Wallace as he straightened his sunglasses. "Bullying the weak is what bad guys do. You're just a boring square … scratch that, you're not even a square because they are the shape of EVIIIIL! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

Wallace laughed manically and soon enough fell out of his bed.

"Alas, beaten by gravity." Sighed Wallace. "The arch-enemy of Evil."

"That … doesn't make sense." Said Carlton as he peaked out from his bed sheets.

"Boo!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

"This is gonna be a loooooong summer." Sighed Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional- Kasimar doesn't need a Halloween costume! …Don't tell him I said that…**

**Kasimar: Scaring the weak; funny as hell. And nobody can stop me, I'm big and they're small. Yahahaha! But … Oscar is quite strong … eh, I'll just get Wallace to put rat poison in his food.**

**Carlton: **(Shaking like a leaf and shuttering). **I w-w-wanna g-g-g-go home. I-i-i-i'm t-t-t-t-t-t-t-terrified.**

**Wallace: The only shape more evil than a square is a triangle; they created trigonometry, the evilest branch of the evilest subject. But I'm still the most evil; aren't I so macho? Mwuhahahahahaha!**

**Oscar: **(Head in muscular hand). **Am I the only sane guy on the team? If we lose I'm voting one of them off; most likely winkus or dinkus.**

* * *

**(Team Grenade, girls)**

Xaria lay back on her bed feeling content; she had been able win the previous challenge for her team; she was currently feeling a very mild version of an emotion she almost never felt, happiness.

"_You've done good Xaria_." She thought to herself. _"You've done good_."

"How do I look gals?" Asked Mable.

Xaria turned to see what Mable meant and raised an eyebrow. Mable was donned in a sea blue and sunset red tie died shirt and trousers. Adding her funky blue and orange hair to the equation … she looked quite colorful.

"Well; we certainly know who studied art for GCSE." Grumbled Xaria.

"You look cool as the north pole girl." Said Lavender with a double thumbs up. "You have a unique fashion sense."

"Thanks." Beamed Mable. "I don't really like following trends; that's why I dyed my hair blue and orange."

"What's so good about colors?" Asked Xaria stiffly. "Each has a flaw; red represents war, blue is glum, purple is like Tinky Winky and green … vomit anyone?"

"Why a-a-are you so n-negative Xaria?" Asked Raven cautiously. "Didn't you have a very good childhood? Or don't you have many friends?"

In response to this Xaria crossed her arms, scowled and was silent, very silent indeed.

"Err … n-never mind." Said Raven with an apologetic shrug.

"You know Xaria; there may be a lot of flaws in the world, a lot indeed." Said Lavender wisely. "But there are equally as many great wonderful things as well."

"Uh huh." Muttered Xaria. "Too bad even the good things have flaws."

Lavender sighed and massaged her temples.

"Sometimes I wonder why I try to help." Lamented Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional- I never complain, I just listen.**

**Xaria: Yes; there is a reason I'm negative … but I'm never telling anyone, got it? And it's not like they'd really care that much. **(She folds her arms). **Friends are cheap, just like life in general.**

* * *

"Don't worry about it." Said Xaria emotionlessly. "It doesn't matter."

"If you're sure." Said Lavender as she got out of bed … and instantly felt a chill; and it didn't help that she wore a skimpy cheerleader's outfit.

"Brrrrrr." Shivered Lavender. "Why has it got so cold?"

"Maybe it's just a cold day?" Suggested Mable.

"But we're in muskoka, and it's the summer! It should be hot, warm at least. It feels like winter!" Exclaimed Lavender.

"Maybe i-it's been s-snowing?" Pondered Raven.

"It's July." Said Xaria with a stony face. "When has it snowed in July?"

"Since just now." Said Mable as she looked out the window. "I knew my leg warmers would come in handy."

* * *

**Confessional- The first snow.**

**Mable: I don't know how it would snow in the summer … I suspect Chris. But I may as well make the most of it. I think it'll be to do with today's challenge. Hopefully I'll have some fun; I do love me a snowball fight.**

**Lavender: This Island is so unrealistic. Cursed Idols, carnivorous wooly beavers, a Sasquatch, sharks that swim right up to land on a daily basis … and now snow in July? This place is insulting the laws of nature. But still, I do like winter and snow. Maybe this won't be so bad.**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle, Girls)**

Quana felt satisfied; Nakia was gone and for the first time since she came to the Island she had gotten a decent night's sleep. Quana didn't like holding grudges but Nakia was pretty mean. She discriminated against people because of their hair, poor Spider, he'd been treated worst my Nakia.

"_He did look surprised he was staying._" Thought Quana to herself. "_I bet the poor guy hasn't had many friends if he thought we'd keep Nakia over him. But the guys and him seem to be pretty good buds_."

"Do you like that Dandelion?" Asked Eleanor to the female of her two ferrets.

Quana sat up and looked towards Eleanor and saw she was stroking one of her ferrets. Eleanor called them Frost and Dandelion; Frost was a handsome pure white color and Dandelion was a cute creamy yellow shade. Currently Dandelion was snuggled up to Eleanor and Eleanor stroked around her neck.

"You're really good with animals aren't you Eleanor?" Smiled Quana. "How long have you had those two?"

"Since they were both nine weeks old; they're both two now. Frost and Dandelion are near and dear to me. In just a few weeks Dandelion's going to have babies!"

"That must be wonderful … but are you sure it's wise to have bought your pets to Wawanakwa?" Asked Quana with Concern.

"Well I want to see the babies as soon as they are born; if I left them at home I wouldn't be able to … but they'll be fine. I'm keeping them in here at all times anyway."

"That's a good idea kid." Said Zita from her bunk. "Word of advice though my friend; don't let that creep Kasimar see them, I don't get the vibe that he likes animals."

"I'll keep that in mind." Agreed Eleanor.

"But I wouldn't worry too much." Continued Zita. "He'd have to be pretty low down to hurt innocent animals, one of which is expecting. Just lock the door and they'll be fine. Any ideas on what the challenge may be today?"

"Hopefully it'll involve singing." Grinned Quana in excitement. "If it is I'll be suited for it."

"I hope it will involve animals." Said Eleanor as she put Dandelion back into the large ferret cage. "I have a way with them. What about you Zita, what do you hope for?"

"Anything involving monetary gain; it has to be said that while I am not a bad person … I am kinda greedy."

"Like Wario then." Said Quana with a nod. "Fairly greedy but with your heart in the right place."

"Thanks." Smiled Zita.

* * *

**Confessional- What do you call a baby ferret anyway? A ferrilet?**

**Eleanor: When Zita isn't stealing she's pretty cool; and she seems quite smart. Quana's like a big sister that I never had, I'm an only child you see. I sure lucked out on the Team I ended on. And with Nakia gone all inner Team conflict has evaporated.**

**Quana: Eleanor's ferrets are just so adorable! I always did like cuddly animals; maybe she'll let me stroke them later; provided they're ok with strangers. **

* * *

(**Team Puzzle, guys)**

Andy and Barney were sitting on the floor reading comic books; they had swapped with each other temporarily, Andy was currently reading a comic entitled 'Captain Slag and the terror of Red Stache cavern'. Barney meanwhile was reading a space comic with the heading 'Attack of the Space Nose Miners'. Both comic were interesting and enjoyable reads.

"Yaaar; Andy, what kind of creature would have a nose that big … and wield a giant pick axe?"

"That's what's great about fictional aliens; they don't have to make sense. And think about it; wouldn't comic suck if they were realistic?" Said Andy as he flipped a page.

"Hmmm … that they would me heartie. Oh; make sure you don't rip the pages or bend the corners, that's a collector's addition, yo ho!"

"You collect pirate comic?" Asked Andy with interest.

"Oh yaaar!" Nodded Barney rapidly eight times in a row. "And not just comic, I've got posters, movies, ships in bottles and some highly collectable pirate figures … I was very needy as a child yaaar."

"I can see that." Chuckled Andy. "Hey Spider; isn't it great that Nakia's gone?"

Spider had been unpacking his suitcase since he woke up; he'd packed it last night as he had thought he would have been walking the dock of shame. Spider looked up and nodded.

"Quite true; she was *cough* overly frivolous and cared *sneeze* nothing for those less *cough* popular or pretty than herself. But *splutter* we may not have seen the last *cough* of her."

"What do you mean?" Asked Andy. "Chris says when you walk the dock of shame you can't come back ever."

"Remember last season *cough* when Izzy and Eva returned halfway? *cough* What if Nakia *sneeze* comes back? She said she'd get *gag* revenge on all of us … *cough* … especially me."

"I wouldn't worry first mate Spider." Smiled Barney. "We'll protect you; but while we've been speaking I can't help but feel we're missing a cabin boy."

"That's a good point; has anyone seen Jimmy?" Asked Andy as he looked around.

"He said something *cough* about taking advantage of the *sneeze* weather while it *cough* lasts." Said Spider as he gestured to the door.

"I wonder what he meant by that." Pondered Andy as he approached the door; upon opening it he got his answer.

Everything outside was covering in a thick blanket of snow; snowflakes were slowly falling from the sky and everything was quite cold.

"Well; guess we know what we'll be doing today eh?" Grinned Barney. "Let's get our coats on."

* * *

**Confessional- FACT. No two snowflakes are exactly alike!**

**Spider: I don't like the** *cough*** snow too much; it makes my ***sneeze*** nose tingle and I sneeze ***hard cough*** more than usual. But if the others ***cough*** enjoy it then that's ***sneeze*** fine.**

**Barney: Yo ho! I love the snow; when I'm not out at sea it's an Eskimo's life for me! Look out Chris; this pirate knows how to manufacture snowballs!**

* * *

The boys got their warmest outfits on and left the heated environment of the cabin and trekked onto the snow. It was quite cold but it was quite nice to look at the trees that had collected snow on their branches.

"Does anybody see Jimmy?" Asked Andy. "I wonder what he's been doing out here."

"Only what every kid does; building a snowman!" Chuckled Barney.

As they headed to camp center a childish voice filled their ears; and it seemed to be singing.

_You wake to the silence_

_The bright afterglow_

_Now there's a surprise_

_For what do you know_

_Its snoooooowing_

_Yes its snoooooowing_

_Little Jack frost has been busy last night_

_The Island of Wawanakwa is a blanket of white_

_Because it's snoooooowing _

The three guys looked to their left, the source of the singing, and saw Jimmy putting the finishing touches on a snowman. He too was in his coat and wore green wooly gloves to keep away the cold.

"Oh hi guys." Said Jimmy as he noticed his bunk mates approaching him. "Like my snowman?"

"It's very well proportioned." Complimented Andy. "Say; were you singing a few seconds ago?"

"That I was." Nodded Jimmy as he stuffed a carrot onto the face of the snowman, goodness knows where he got the carrot from though.

"It was a really good song me heartie." Grinned Barney genkily. "Where did you learn to sing like that?"

"I just picked it up through the years." Smiled Jimmy. "Do any of you know why there is snow everywhere?"

"Heck if I know." Shrugged Andy.

"*Sneeze* *sneeze* *sneeze* *sneeze*!" Sneezed Spider rapidly and loudly. He took out a tissue and wiped his tingly nose.

"Are you ok Spider?" Asked Jimmy in concern.

"I'm *sneeze* fine little buddy; I *sneeze* just sneeze a *sneeze* lot in the *sneeze* cold." Explained Spider.

* * *

**Confessional- Sneeze!**

**Spider: It's official ***sneeze*** I hate the ***sneeze* **cold.**

**Jimmy: Spider doesn't seem to like the snow very much; that's a shame, the snow is great fun. You can make snow angels, snowmen, go sledging, have snowball fights with you friends, make a fort and go ice skating! I love the snow!**

* * *

"What's going on out here?" Asked Lavender as she walked up wearing a coat.

Everyone was exiting their cabins in coats and warm cloths; some looked excited, others looked very annoyed at the current weather.

"Well me red headed sea lassie; it appears we've got a snow day in the summer." Smiled Barney. "It could be caused by an extratropical cyclone flowing up and over the cold air. The resulting water vapor freezes and creates snow … though it seems a tad too much for summer time arrrrr?"

Lavender seemed to understand what Barney said but also looked surprised.

"I thought you were just a stereotypical pirate who liked saying yaaar." Said Lavender in amazement. "Are you smart?"

"A little column A, a little column B." Said Barney with a shrug.

Before Lavender could ask anything else the sound of bells was heard. Suddenly several interns dressed as reindeer ran up looking very tired and in pain; behind them they dragged a sleigh; sitting in it was Chris dressed as an elf and Chef Hatchet dressed as Santa. The sleigh stopped in front of the camper's and the interns kneeled over panting.

"Merry Christmas children both naughty and nice!" Smiled Chris merrily.

"Ho ho ho!" Said Chef none to enthusiastically.

"Chris; why are you dressed as an elf when it's not even Christmas?" Asked Mable with a raised eyebrow. "It doesn't look good."

"Well it's part of today's challenge of course." Said Chris. "And don't disrespect Santa or his elf or its coal for you."

"Why is it snowing?" Asked Tabitha in confusion. "It's July!"

"Oh let's just say we have some good mechanics and some good connections." Smiled Chris.

"SANTA!" Screamed Jimmy in joy as he ran towards Chef who he seemed to think was Santa. "Oh boy; it's really you! What am I getting for Christmas? Am I on the nice list? Who trims your beard?"

"Beat it kid." Grumbled Chef.

"But your supposed to be a merry old soul." Said Jimmy in confusion, before realization hit him. "You're not Santa! You're Chef Hatchet; I bet the only merry soul you have is crushing us merrily under the sole of your shoe!"

"Jimmy does realize that." Began Zita before being shushed my Quana.

"He's ten years old; of course he'll believe." Said Quana logically. "And don't even think of telling him the truth."

"Don't worry; my lips are sealed." Nodded Zita.

* * *

**Confessional- Merry Christmas!**

**Quana: I hope none of the meaner campers try and reveal the truth to Jimmy before he's ready, which … would be really mean. But a Christmas challenge? Why not? I love the festivity of Christmas and all the magic in the air. **(Sighs happily)

**Xaria: I don't like Christmas; not really into the whole 'Christmas magic thing'. Go figure.**

**Gary: Christmas; I like it very much, I always cook the Christmas dinner … though it can be hard ensuring that each years dinner tops the previous.**

* * *

"Now that we've clarified Chef is not the real Santa may I continue?" Asked Chris with an impatient tap of his foot. "As you can see today's challenge will be based around Christmas; my favorite holiday, you can't have Christmas without saying Chris."

"Are you really that self absorbed?" Asked Eleanor in shock. "I bet you're in love with your reflection."

"True, true." Smiled Chris arrogantly. "Now; today's challenge is a two parter, first you will be racing sleighs down the thousand foot cliff and hopefully not crashing into anything."

"H-hopefully." Repeated Raven.

"Hopefully not; but if you do it's no skin off my bones … and the second part will be decorating a tree and trying to find the decorations. Best tree wins … oh; and while doing all this you will be dressed as Christmas elves!"

There was a silence; crickets chirped despite it being day time.

"You must be retarded if you think I'm going to dress as a wussy elf." Growled Kasimar. "There is no effing WAY I'm doing it."

"Not even if I mention the penalty for not doing it?" Said Chris with a smirk.

"Lay it on me; I don't care what it is."

"The penalty for not wearing the elf outfit is an all expense paid rip on the boat o losers and out of the game." Said Chris sadistically. "What will it be Kasimar? Humiliation and stay … or keep your dignity and go?"

Kasimar looked as though he had been hit with a sledgehammer; he stuck a fist up to Chris and growled.

"Sleep with one eye open you spastic wretch." Snarled Kasimar; with his Mohawk and angry face he looked quite intimidating indeed.

"Everyone happy? Good." Said Chris sounding satisfied. "The winners of the sleigh race will get an advantage in the second part of the challenge. I won't say what it is though."

A few interns dressed as elves walked up with boxes; they put them in a pile and left without a word.

"Those boxes contain your costumes; each one has a label with one of your names on it; your particular costume is in exactly your size so it won't be baggy or tight." Explained Chris. "You can go into your cabins to change; seriously, some of you may be pretty hot but I don't want a peep show from Hector; eew!"

"Once again Chris; the attention means a lot to me." Said Hector sarcastically. "But if that's the best insult you can think off then I guess if I had a dollar for every brain you didn't have … I would have one dollar."

A number of the contestants laughed while Chris let out a whine of frustration.

"No fair! You're just a contestant, you can't backchat me! I'm The Chris Maclean!" Whined Chris while stamping his feet. "Whatever! Just get changed and meet me at the top of the thousand foot cliff! Oh; and no coats allowed! Haha!"

"What?" Asked Irene in shock. "But we'll freeze! We're not evergreen trees!"

"Not my problem; just look at me and feel my empowering hotness and I'm sure you'll be warmer." Said Chris snidely as he left.

The contestants were silent; Chris was letting them freeze just because he felt like it? Some of them were children or sick! This just wasn't right.

"What a dick yaaar!" Growled Barney in annoyance at the narcissist host.

* * *

**Confessional- Chaotic evil … or just a dick?**

**Irene: I get cold really easily; why can't we wear our coats? Does Chris care about anybody but himself?**

**Kasimar: Chris Maclean is starting to piss me off! I'm a tough guy, I'm feared and I hurt innocent people, I do not flippin dress as an elf! If we win I'm burning the elf outfit!**

**Spider: This won't ***cough* **be fun. In the ***sneeze* **cold with no warmth? After ***cough* **this … my nose won't** *sneeze* **feel good.**

* * *

An hour later the campers had gotten changed into their elf outfits and were heading towards the top of the thousand foot cliff. While most were about halfway up Wallace and Kasimar had already reached the top.

"I can see you're wasting no time in the dirty tricks department." Observed Kasimar as Wallace was half under one of the sleighs. "And run it by me again; how did we possibly get so far ahead?"

"It's a common evil villain trait." Explained Wallace without looking away from his job. "As nobody was actually watching us I was able to transport us a hyper speed up to the top of the hill, all classic villains can do it. How else would Dick Dastardly have built up such a lead in each wacky race when he was crashing so much?"

"I see; though it hardly makes sense, I understand." Shrugged Kasimar. "What exactly are you doing anyway?"

"I'm attaching a bomb to Team Jungle's sleigh; since I cheated against Team Puzzle last time it's about time for me to cheat against Team Jungle; I have to alternate to keep it fair."

"I would have thought that as a so called bad guy you wouldn't care about fairness." Said Kasimar. "But a bomb sounds pretty cool; maybe someone will have to get amputated; it'll be like back home where I went to the A and E for a cheap laugh every now and then."

"Yes; this will be pretty evil, but I don't want to kill anyone, I'm saving that for when I have a mortal enemy." Said Wallace as he crawled out from under the sleigh. "And the deed is done; evil strikes again! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

Wallace took out his remote and pressed a button. Like a few times before, evil organ music came out of nowhere while Wallace laughed manically.

"How can that music get here when there are no speakers anywhere nearby?" Asked Kasimar. "I guess it doesn't matter; will I be able to ram into Team Puzzle during the race?"

"Does a fish swim? Of course!" Nodded Wallace. "Extra cheating won't hurt … well it won't hurt us anyway … look sharp, here come the others."

Wallace and Kasimar quickly stood by their team's sleigh as the other twenty campers arrived at the top of the hill. As they headed towards their respective sleighs Lavender looked at Wallace and Kasimar suspiciously.

"How did you two get up here so fast?" She asked in puzzlement. "And what did you do?"

"We got here quickly because nobody was watching us and we did nothing … nothing too bad." Said Wallace with a shifty look.

"I see; but if anyone dies then I'm blaming you." Said Lavender swiftly.

"That's no problem; that way I'll be recognized as a villain." Chuckled Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- War does not determine who is right … only who is left.**

**Lavender: Wallace is a lunatic; he openly admits he's evil and has theme music that comes out of nowhere. I think the only strengths I can see in him are that he's really intelligent and he's got Kasimar as a friend … why did he have to end up on this Team, why did Kasimar have to be on the team as well?**

**Wallace: I hope this bomb works out ok; I always carry a supply of explosives around with me just in case; not ones that can kill, just ones that knock out the victim or blow stuff up. And I'll have to cover the hole from day two back up again, why dig multiple holes for one use when you can use one hole multiple times. It's evil and efficient! Mwuhahahahahaha!**

* * *

As the campers stood around their sleighs Chris arrived with a latté and stood in the center of all sleighs.

"Good to see you all made it up the cliff in one piece; but can you get back down without a few broken parts?" Asked Chris with a chuckle. "This race will be fast and furious; speed will be of the essence but you'll need to steer your sleighs around obstacles as well. Each sleigh has a set of reigns in it for you to turn it with; try not to crash as those sleighs weren't cheap."

"How d-do we use t-the reigns?" Asked Raven intelligently as it was quite a good question.

"That is a very good question … and I'm not answering." Smirked Chris sadistically. "You'll have to figure it out for yourself; just imagine you're riding a horse or something."

"You're parents didn't love you much did they?" Grumbled Xaria.

"Nope!" Laughed Chris without a care.

"This challenge … might be painful." Sighed Vinnie. "At least my hat will keep my head warm."

"Lucky." Said Uzuri with a smile. "I wish I'd bought my Troll hat but when I wore it to school a few people fainted."

Carlton looked very frightened as he looked down the slope; he looked paler than usual and covered his eyes.

"Oh give it a rest Carlton." Sighed Xaria. "Nobody goes through life without getting scared but seriously, have you ever felt brave?"

Carlton just whimpered in Response and Xaria sighed in exasperation.

"Just don't scream too loud." She said with a grumble.

"The teams have made it to the top of the cliff and are about to sleigh down … in elf costumes! Haha!" Laughed Chris to the camera. "Who will win the race? Who will come out on top in the second part of the challenge? And who will be next to walk the dock of shame? Find out when we return on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

And that wraps up Day four part 1; we know the challenge and we also know Wallace has cheated again. But just so you know ... he's not the main antagonist, he's more comic relief. Tabitha and Kasimar are the real antagonists.

Next time- The bomb goes off, the hole makes a reappearence, the winners and losers are decleared and someone walks the dock of shame.


	8. Day 4, Part 2, White Christmas Island

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or World Tour. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; it was first used by Frank15 so credit goes to him for that. I do however own all twenty six contestant OC's in the story so don't steal them.

**The Warning:** This story contains bullying, some love, bad language, evil laughter, a horrible bully, insults and screaming. Nothing M rated though so don't worry.

**Pairings: **This time I can say something. I won't confirm anything but three are hinted at during this chapter, keep your eyes peeled.

**Note: **This chapter is in my opinion the best yet! It features the first moral event horizon … don't know what it is? Look it up on TV tropes. Another person it voted of and it might not be who you expect. So enjoy the chapter

Let's shift into high gear!

* * *

"And welcome back to Total Drama Letterz." Waved Chris to the camera.

"Once again we didn't go anywhere." Said Mable.

"Shut up hippie." Whined Chris. "You wouldn't understand because you're not smart. Now everyone aboard the sleighs!"

"One of these days his karma will arrive." Grumbled Mable as she climbed into the Sleigh.

"What g-goes around c-c-comes around." Smiled Raven confidently. "He'll get h-his eventually."

"Here's hoping." Said Mable as she sat down in the sleigh and looked at where they were required to go.

The slope had seemed a lot less dangerous on the way up; rocks and trees were scattered around and some of the ground was icy and very unsafe.

"This challenge looks kinda dangerous." Said Lavender in uncertainty.

"That's what makes it fun." Smiled Chris sadistically. "Now you're going to need someone to give your sleighs a push start down the hill. The push could give you a big advantage or potentially ruin your chances if it's weak. Decide quickly; I'm not standing here for the good of my health."

* * *

**Confessional- One, two, three, PUSH!**

**Oscar: My team elected me to push; it makes sense as I'm the strongest. Kasimar may be strong but most of us didn't want to trust him. All the while Wallace kept chuckling to himself, I wonder why.**

**Barney: This will be great fun yaaar! It'll be like a roller coaster, my second favorite fairground ride after the pirate ship! Yo ho!**

* * *

The three sledges were lined up at the top of the hill, only a few inches from the harsh downward slope. Barney was to push to Team Puzzle, Oscar for Team Grenade and Hector for Team Jungle.

"Is everybody ready?" Asked Chris as he held a starter pistol.

Carlton was shivering and huddling up in fear. Mable sighed to herself.

"Carlton; just for once try to be brave. There has to be something you're not afraid of." Said Mable dryly.

"Well … I'm not scared of Vanilla cake." Said Carlton with a small smile.

"I see." Said Mable. "Hey Lavender; are you sure you can steer this thing?"

Lavender was sitting at the front of the sleigh with the reigns in hand. She looked back and nodded.

"I'm positive; I've ridden a horse before, can steering a sleigh be much different?" Asked Lavender. "And besides; we have the most people so the added weight will give us more momentum and make us go faster."

"Care to explain what momentum is ginger?" Asked Kasimar from the back of the sleigh.

"Momentum is velocity times mass." Said Lavender before scowling. "And I'd prefer you to not call me ginger."

"What you gonna do about it?" Sneered Kasimar.

"This!" Yelled Lavender as she whipped the reigns at Kasimar's shoulder; he let out a pained yelp and growled before staying silent.

"You go g-girl." Clapped Raven.

"Nothing to it." Shrugged Lavender.

"Ok everyone; get ready!" Said Chris as he raised the pistol. "On the count of three the pushers must push and the race shall begin."

Barney, Oscar and Hector readied themselves as their teammates held onto the safety bars inside the sleigh.

"Three, two … one … … … GO!" Yelled Chris as he pulled the trigger and created a gunshot sound.

"Let's rock and rides yaaar!" Cheered Barney as he pushed the sleigh forwards quickly and leapt aboard.

"Not so fast pirate!" Called Oscar as with an almighty shove he and his Team were in motion, with Carlton screaming all the way.

Hector shoved his Team's sleigh hard and climbed on as they sped agilely down the steep slope.

* * *

**Confessional- Jingle bells!**

**Carlton: **(Shivering in fear). **That … was the scariest thing I've ever experienced … help me.**

**Raven: Poor Carlton; s-scared of e-everything all , he doesn't b-belong here. Poor kid.**

* * *

The sleighs were in motion speeding quickly down the cliff; Team Puzzle was in the lead with Team Grenade right beside them. Team Jungle was behind but not by much.

"Shiver me timbers! Woohoo!" Cheered Barney as he raised his arms up and down.

"Be careful Barney!" Cautioned Andy. "We don't want you falling out of the sleigh."

"Party pooper." Said Barney as he sat still.

Team Grenades sleigh was picking up speed and zoomed down the cliff alongside Team Puzzle; Kasimar turned to his opponents and cracked his knuckles.

"Time for some pain." Grinned Kasimar as he picked up a giant candy cane from inside his team's sleigh and whacked the other sleigh with it.

Team Puzzle swerved a little and were soon back on track but Kasimar simply whacked them again.

"Yahahaha! Feel my wrath weakling!" Laughed Kasimar as he smacked the Candy cane right onto Spider.

"… Ouch." Said Spider as he flopped to the bottom of the sleigh.

"Spider!" Yelled Quana in worry. "Someone stop Kasimar; I'll tend to Spider.

* * *

**Confessional- Sword fight.**

**Barney: With a first mate down, our captain distracted and the enemy firing upon us it was up to me to put my pirate skills to the test and defeat the kraken! Yo ho!**

* * *

Barney jumped up and picked up another giant candy cane from the bottom of the sleigh and faced Kasimar.

"Yaaaaar! Prepare for defeat." Grinned Barney as he whacked Kasimar with the candy cane.

"Yowch! That hurt you maniac!" Yelled Kasimar as he swung at Barney; the pirate was too fast and in a blink of an eye dodged to the side.

"You'll have to do better than that me heartie." Laughed Barney as he jabbed Kasimar.

"Quit it you crazy person!" Growled Kasimar as he swung for Barney's feet, Barney jumped and evaded.

"Tsk, tsk me heartie." Said Barney with a shake of his head. "One thing that you must learn in life is that nobody is a better pirate than Barney Scott Bolitho, yo ho!"

"So long slow pokes!" Taunted Irene as Team Jungle sped past at quite a speed.

Team Puzzle and Team Grenade looked ahead and at each other. They had been so busy trying to beat each other they had forgotten about the third team in the race, the team that was now in first place.

"Faster Lavender faster!" Yelled Oscar quickly.

"Right on; heeya!" Said Lavender as she sped up the sleigh though Team Puzzle was but a meter behind.

* * *

**Confessional- What happened next. BOOM!**

**Wallace: Upon seeing that Team Jungle was ahead I knew it was time to detonate the bomb, the explosion was exquisitely evil! Mwuhahahahahaha!**

**Lavender: I ought to keep Wallace on a leash, or better yet in a straightjacket! He could have really hurt someone!**

**Uzuri **(Her cloths and skin are blackened). **Though in retrospect I should have been afraid, the explosion was so cool! The screams were like something out of a horror movie; it's like the premiere of SAW once again! Teehee!**

**Tabitha: **(Blackened and NOT happy). **Wallace … is going to pay.**

* * *

"There getting ahead; we'll never catch up!" Cried Lavender as the sleigh would go no faster.

Wallace cackled evilly and stood up; and as all you readers will know, Wallace cackling or laughing at all … is NOT a good sign.

"Not for long they won't be." Said Wallace as he took out his remote.

"Wait; what are you going to do?" Asked Oscar in suspicion.

"I'ma firing my LAZOR! Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed on of the buttons on the remote.

BOOOOOOOM!

As soon as Wallace pressed the button, Team jungle's sleigh exploded with a loud ka-boom. As the wreckage of the sleigh began to grind to a halt Kasimar burst out laughing.

"Yahahaha! Oh man, good one Wallace! Did you hear their screams? Awesome!"

Everyone else looked less than pleased and Oscar looked quit annoyed and actually angry.

"That was uncool Wallace." Scowled Oscar. "Someone could have been seriously hurt!"

"That's what makes it fun." Laughed Wallace.

Up ahead Team Jungle were slowing down and the finish line was getting closer. Yessica looked petrified while Uzuri was giggling in excitement.

"What just happened?" Asked Yessica with a whimper as she clutched her heart.

"It appears the sleigh exploded." Noted Hector as he dusted himself off. "It has blown up not only our ride but also our chances of winning the race."

"Noooo!" Yelled Tabitha in fury. "When I find out who did this; oh, they'll be sorry."

Tabitha noticed her team was looking at her in surprise from her outburst. She needed an excuse and had one in half an instant.

"Sorry about that everyone; I just don't like losing, especially when it's the result of cheating." Lied Tabitha craftily. "Are you all ok?"

"I'm fine." Said Vinnie is relief. "Wouldn't want to lose my other arm after all."

"I'm ok; though I feel a little shaken." Said Gary with a shrug.

"Here comes the finish line." Pointed Yessica. "We might still win!"

The wrecked sleigh slowly edged towards the finish line, it looked like they could pull off a win … not.

At that moment Team Grenade sped past and over the line in first place. And to make matters worse only a second after that Team Puzzle finished in second, just moments before Team Jungle crossed the line.

"Yeah! Evil is victorious! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace triumphantly.

"You maniac!" Yelled Mable. "You could have killed someone!"

"And up the evil villain ladder I would have gone." Nodded Wallace. "But it doesn't matter; thanks to me we have won the race and an advantage in the second part of the challenge."

Mable slapped her forehead and turned away from the wannabe villain; if they lost Wallace was a strong candidate for her vote. A very strong candidate indeed.

"Bubba ha bub dub wah waaah!" Whimpered Carlton as he shakily got off the sleigh; a wet patch was evident on his trousers much to everyone's disgust.

"Eeeeewww!" Cringed Raven. "Carlton, m-maybe you s-s-should go and change your p-pants."

Carlton just shuddered and looked at his shoes.

* * *

**Confessional- Bad guys always win if they cheat.**

**Mable: I don't know how much longer I can put up with Wallace; he's a danger to normal people everywhere and I don't want anybody to suffer. But Carlton; yeesh! He screams about everything and keeps the other guys up at night; we'll need Oscar's strength quite often. It's only a matter of time before our team loses.**

**Wallace: Mwuhahaha! Oh man that was wonderful, my plan worked, I'm the best villain ever and nobody can defeat me! I'll rule the world! Mwahahahaha!**

* * *

Team Puzzle climbed out of their sleigh; well, everyone but Spider climbed out as he was carried by Barney and Andy due to being knocked out. They laid him down on the snow as they along with the rest of the team looked on with concernment.

"Is he going to be ok?" Asked Quana nervously.

"It was but a bump to the head me heartie." Said Barney reassuringly. "He'll be fine … but how to wake him up?"

"Maybe a bucket of cold water?" Suggested Zita. "I've seen it on TV a number of times and it always worked.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." Said Andy intelligently.

"Why not Andy?" Asked Eleanor curiously.

"Yeah; why?" Asked Zita.

"Well; think about it; it's cold, very cold, and pouring freezing water on him in this weather may make Spider worse, if you fall asleep in a really cold place you may never wake up … and adding freezing water wouldn't help."

"I've got an idea!" Smiled Jimmy. "I've heard that if a princess is kissed by a prince they will awaken, maybe it'll work the other way around? Quana; care to do the honors?"

Quana's eyes widened at what was being asked of her; she a blush appeared on her finely tanned face and she turned away.

"Err, Jimmy; I know you mean well with your idea but I don't think that would work … and trust me, I only give kisses to those who I feel have earned it … in other words not one person up to this day! How about we just … let him come around?"

Quana was right in saying this; a moment later Spider let out a groan and rubbed his head. He got to his feet and looked at his team mates.

"Did we *cough* win? And why does *double cough* my head hurt?" Asked Spider as he sniffled his nose.

"Well sorry to say it Spider; but we didn't win the race, we came second. Team Grenade beat us so we don't get an advantage in this part of the challenge." Explained Andy. "As to why your head hurts, well."

"You got beaned on the head by a giant candy cane Yaaar!" Exclaimed Barney as he interrupted Andy. "I avenged you by epically dueling Kasimar, scourge of the sleighs."

"I wouldn't call it epic." Said Zita plainly. "But you're quick on your feet; that bully didn't hit you once!"

"I guess he's as slow as his brain." Giggled Eleanor.

"Good one *cough* Eleanor." Said Spider with a small laugh.

* * *

**Confessional- Pucker up! **

**Quana: I know Jimmy means well and he's a really nice kid … but I get a little nervous about this whole 'kissy business' thing. I'm just not really ready for a serious relationship; lord knows how many guys want to court me. Anyway; Spider's nice and he seems pretty intelligent … but I'd prefer to remain single.**

**Spider: Do you ever get the feeling someone is talking about you and you've narrowly missed something important? Quana did look a little awkward and Barney was quite smiley … a little more than usual.**

* * *

A few moments later Chris arrived; he was in a warm winter coat much to the envy of a lot of the campers; they were cold and forbidden to wear coats while Chris was warm and snug. And he had the audacity to dress them as elves! But Chris wasn't like most people, he was nasty.

"Good to see all of you made it to the bottom of the hill in one piece, well, most of you." Said Chris with no care that people may have been hurt. "As Team Grenade finished in first place they get the advantage in the next part of the challenge."

Team Jungle didn't look pleased; Tabitha glared at Chris while the others folded their arms, only Uzuri didn't look angry … but she was a little odd so she didn't really count.

"If you would all follow me to camp center I will explain the rules of the next part of the challenge, and it's going to take you a while to complete it." Said Chris as he left towards the camp.

The campers looked at each other and collectively sighed as they followed the sadistic host.

Upon arriving back at camp center campers saw three Christmas trees had been set up. They were green, bushy and smelt like Christmas. Chris gestured to them and smiled.

"Beauties aren't they?" Said Chris with a nod. "And you're going to make them better. For immunity from tonight's vote you must decorate your team's tree. You can see which tree is yours by the flag. The catch is that you have no decorations."

"So how exactly do you propose we decorate the trees then?" Asked Xaria bluntly. "I don't know how well this challenge was thought out."

"Shut uuuup!" Whined Chris. "I'm getting to that! You have to find the decorations yourselves, they are hidden all around the Island. You have to find them and bring them back. They don't have locks so you can easily open them and get at the decorations inside."

"What types of decorations are there?" Inquired Quana. "Tinsel makes me sneeze."

"You'll be sneezing then because tinsel is one of the decorations along with ba-balls, stars, angels, lights and yogurt pots." Laughed Chris sadistically as always. "You have six hours to find as many boxes of decorations as you can and decorate your tree."

"But you didn't tell us what the boxes look like." Pointed out Andy.

"Oh; didn't I?" Smiled Chris.

"No, you didn't." Replied Andy stonily.

"Well just so you know, the boxes are striped green and red so you should spot them fairly easily. Your time starts … now!"

Everyone stood still for half a second before running around and into the woods to find the boxes before the other teams beat them to it.

* * *

**Confessional- We have a box!**

**Hector: **(Holding a box and smirking). **I had a feeling Chris would hide a box in here; who would think of looking in the confessional he probably thought. Well my dear Chris, I would think of that. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to look for more boxes.**

* * *

Spider, Andy and Barney, like everyone else, had gone into the woods to look for some boxes of decorations. So far they had found one in a log near camp; but they would need more than just one box.

"Arrr; where be the boxes?" Asked Barney as he looked around. "I could do with a treasure map."

"They're probably hidden." Said Andy. "So I doubt they'll be out in the open."

They walked to the base of a large tree; Spider caught a hint of red and green from above and looked up. He could plainly see a box.

"Hey guys! It; *cough* a box!"

"Good job Spider." Said Andy. "Now how are we going to get it down? This tree looks too big to climb."

"I have a solution me heartie." Said Barney as he backed up a bit.

Before Andy or Spider could ask what Barney was doing Barney had unsheathed hid dagger. He aimed, reared back and tossed it. It span around and sliced through the strong hanging the box and boomeranged back to Barney's waiting hand.

"Nothing to it matey's." Smiled Barney as he took a bow.

"Err Barney? I think you should have let us move out of the way." Said Andy as he gestured to Spider.

Spider had been bonked on the head by the box and was lying on the ground with stars circling his face.

"Oopsie poopsie." Said Barney as he tipped his hat in respect. "Two bonks in one day, Spider's a living chew toy."

"Good job getting the box though." Said Andy while giving Barney a thumbs up. "How did you make your dagger do that?"

"That's a secret of the pirate life me first mate." Grinned Barney as he sheathed the dagger.

Spider groaned and got back up with the box in his arms.

"These frequent bumps on *cough* the head might give me a *sneeze* concussion." Said Spider while rubbing his head with his free hand. "Should we keep *cough* looking for boxes?"

"That we will." Nodded Barney speedily. "We'll need all the boxes we can carry, follow me!"

Barney sped off into the trees while Spider and Andy ran after him.

"Do you know where you're going?" Asked Andy.

"Nope!" Laughed Barney.

* * *

**Confessional- Looks like boxes grow on trees.**

**Andy: I consider Barney my best friend here … but he's so wild. He's always on the move! In the first challenge he didn't even stop for breath. Where does he get that energy from?**

**Barney: Most people think I drink coffee; truth be told I don't really like the stuff, I prefer apple juice. Yo ho!**

* * *

Wallace was putting the finishing touches on the coverage for his deep hole. Leaves and twigs had been used and looked just like the rest of the ground. He backed away in glee and looked on proudly at his work.

"Oh this is genius; it can't possibly fail! Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace. "Now all we need is some bait."

"Are you gonna use an Easter egg again?" Asked Kasimar. "If the metal arm guy comes along he'll know it's a trap."

"Which is why I'm using different bait, I'm gonna use … a decoration box!"

Wallace whipped out one of the green and red boxes and placed it over the covered hole. He nodded to himself in satisfaction and turned to Kasimar.

"Pretty good plan don't you think my right hand man?"

"Using a box as bait is stupid; you could lose it; why not put a playboy comic as bait, any guy would want that."

"I didn't because there are kids here; don't want to warp them. That's the wrong type of evil."

"Oh yeah; because there's a right type of evil." Scoffed Kasimar. "I don't think this is going to work."

"Oh it will, it will." Grinned Wallace confidently. "…Did you hear that?"

"The sound of no one caring?" Asked Kasimar.

"No you naïve fool; I mean the sound of voices! People are coming! Let's hide and watch them fall!" Said Wallace in great excitement.

Wallace dived behind a bush and Kasimar stood behind a tree. A moment after they hid Gary and Raven entered the clearing.

"It's nice you've c-come a-along Gary; but we aren't o-on the s-same team." Said Raven.

"We both have the same goal; and besides, we did pretty well together in the first challenge."

"You sure u-u-upset Daisy." Nodded Raven shyly. "Though she w-w-was pretty m-mean."

"She had it coming." Shrugged Gary as he looked into a hedge and reached in. He came out with a box. "I was searching this way anyway. We just ran into each other and you don't seem to have left."

"Well … I don't want to get lost." Said Raven.

"A fair point; and I had something I wanted to ask you anyway." Said Gary with a sudden look of seriousness.

"W-what is i-it." Asked Raven with a look of curiosity before spotting something. "Hey l-look, it's a-another box."

Raven pointed to the bait box and Gary nodded. Behind the bush Wallace held back an evil chuckle.

"Since you don't have a box I guess you can have that one; I'm a good sport." Said Gary.

Raven quickly ran to the box followed by Gary; before she could pick it up the covering fell apart and they both fell down the hole and landed with a thud.

"What the heck?" Said Gary as he got up. "Why is there a hole here?"

The sound of an insidious manical laughter rang from above. Gary looked up and saw Wallace and Kasimar looking down at them.

"Oh no, i-it's Kasimar." Whimpered Raven.

"He's a dick!" Agreed Gary. "Get us out of here!"

"No can do 'Jamie Oliver'." Smiled Wallace meanly. "You've fallen right into my trap! You're stuck down there forever! You'll rot until you're nothing but a skeleton! Mwahahahaha!"

"But you've just trapped one of your own team mates!" Pointed out Gary. "You'll have to get Raven out!"

"In a few hours maybe." Said Wallace. "I can't have her telling everyone about my pit trap."

"You're crazy." Said Gary before it dawned on him. "Wait! You were the one that dug the hole in the theme song challenge that Fifi fell down weren't you!" Vinnie got blamed for that!"

"Yes I did! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he turned his theme music on.

"Sucks to be you huh you short arsed googly eyed ass butt!" sneered Kasimar as he kicked some dirt into the hole. "Hope you don't mind darkness!"

* * *

**Confessional- Lights out.**

**Wallace: I won't leave them in there forever; they must get even with me, the showdown will be epic! But until then they can just sit in the dark! Mwahahahaha!**

**Kasimar: Seeing Raven afraid like that … felt good. Maybe she'll die of fright. Yahahaha! Oh I love causing pain!"**

* * *

Wallace and Kasimar quickly put more branches and leaves over the top and it got quite dark. Gary put his box next to him and sighed bitterly.

"So what do we do now?" Asked Gary aloud. "I don't suppose you can climb out huh Raven?"

His response was a sniffling; Gary turned and saw Raven looked terrified and had her head in her knees.

"Are you ok Raven?" Asked Gary in concern.

Raven looked up and shook her head.

"N-no." She whispered. "I-i-i-i'm claustrophobic."

She trembled and huddled herself up while Gary looked up to the surface.

"We've got to get out of here." Whispered Gary to himself.

* * *

**Confessional- Claustrophobia? I didn't know she was scared of Santa!**

**Kasimar: Seeing other people suffer in funny; screams of pain and pleas for help make me laugh. I could grow to like it here. Yahaha!**

* * *

Lavender, Mable and Carlton each had a box and Lavender was feeling quite pleased. Nearby was the bear cave and Mable thought there was a box inside it.

"Looks like we're going in the bear cave." Said Mable as she pointed as said cave. "Considering its owner there must be a box in there."

"B-b-b-bear cave?" Wailed Carlton in fear.

"I shouldn't have said anything." Sighed Mable.

"I'm not going in there!" Said Carlton as he trembled.

"But Carlton; we'll need your help; just be brave."

"Nuh uh!" Said Carlton firmly. "I'm not going in, it's dark, and there are spiders, a bear and dripping water!"

"No! I'm too scared!" Said Carlton as he trembled like a leaf. It was rather pathetic to watch really.

"Ok fine; we'll go in ourselves." Said Mable with an annoyed sigh as she and Lavender entered the cave.

Inside the cave it was a little dar; light shone in from the entrance though some parts of the cave were in darkness, in direct line with the light were two boxes, both red and green.

"Looks like I was right." Said Mable in satisfaction as she picked the boxes up and gave one of them to Lavender.

"Good going girl." Smiled Lavender. "Let's get back to Carlton; he might be scared of being alone."

"That's a likely possibility." Sighed Mable. "I'm not mean or anything but I wish he wasn't on our team."

"I understand." Said Lavender sympathetically. "I personally wish Kasimar wasn't on the team. But we'll have to make do; now let's get these boxes back to camp."

"Good idea … but where did the bear go?" Asked Mable.

"I don't know and frankly I don't want to know." Answered Lavender as they exited the cave. Carlton was still shaking on the spot.

"There was no bear in the cave Carlton." Said Lavender. "Could you carry a box?"

"No, get it away!" Wailed Carlton as he stepped back.

"Are you afraid of boxes?" Asked Carlton in disbelief.

"No; I'm scared of red." Said Carlton as he huddled up in fear.

"Oh that's right." Said Lavender in remembrance. "Remember the first day in the maze? He's got Chromophobia of the color red."

"Fine; well carry the boxes then." Said Mable in exasperation. "Carlton … you're a coward, no offense meant."

"That's ok; my label is 'the wimp'." Shrugged Carlton as he kept a distance from the boxes.

* * *

**Confessional- Scared of a box? Weird…**

**Carlton: I wanna go home! Is that too much to ask? How much more suffering must I endure?**

**Mable: Kasimar may be a sociopath bully, and Wallace may be a crazy bad guy … but they both have some use to the team. Carlton however is kinda useless; we might have to let him go…**

* * *

Quana reached into a hollow tree and pulled out a box. She turned to her teammates Eleanor and Jimmy and nodded.

"That's another box. This challenge isn't so hard." Smiled Quana. "Do you see any other boxes?"

"Not at the moment." Said Eleanor as she looked around with no success.

"Well we've got, like, three boxes now, that should be enough for now." Said Quana. "Perhaps we should get back to camp and start decorating the tree?"

"Good idea Quana; we'll need to check how much progress the other teams are making." Agreed Eleanor.

They headed back the way they came hadn't walked three steps before Jimmy spoke up.

"I can see a box." Said Jimmy in his usual happy tone.

"Where?" Asked Eleanor. "I don't see one, could you point to it?"

"Sure thing Eleanor, it's up there." Said Jimmy as he pointed to the top of a large tree. Balanced at the top was a box, way out of climbing reach of anyone.

"How are we going to get up there?" Asked Quana. "I can't do it; climbing trees isn't my strong point, every time I try I climb up two feet and then fall on my butt."

"It's too high for me." Said Eleanor as she gazed up at the box. "And a fall could mean a broken limb."

Jimmy thought hard for a moment and had an idea.

"I know; if we wish hard enough it will come down." Said Jimmy happily.

Quana and Eleanor looked at each other and back at Jimmy; he had his eyes closed tight and his fingers crossed, he seemed to be wishing. Quana was about to tell Jimmy that it wouldn't work in real life when a screech startled all of them.

Up above a large bird flew in the sky; it had a wingspan of at least ten feet. It flew next to the box and knocked it with its wing. The box wobbled and toppled off its perch and down to the feet of Jimmy.

"Ta da." Said Jimmy as he struck a pose.

"He summoned us an eagle." Said Eleanor in wonder.

Quana smiled and beamed at Jimmy.

"Jimmy; you are full of surprises." Said Quana warmly.

"Oh it was nothing." Said Jimmy as he picked up the box. "Animals just seem to like me."

As the three puzzlers headed back to camp, Eleanor looked at Jimmy in amazement.

"_He summoned an eagle just by wishing_." Thought Eleanor in wonder. "_I can tell me and Jimmy are going to get along fine, maybe he could teach me some tricks I don't know_?"

* * *

**Confessional- Wishing star!**

**Jimmy: Even I don't know how I did that; it was probably coincidence but it could be to do with the Christmas magic in the air. Christmas is such a wonderful time.**

**Eleanor: I wonder if I could summon a unicorn by wishing. I doubt it but nothing's impossible, only improbable.**

**Quana: I think that even if we lose tonight, I won't be voting for Jimmy. That was amazing; I wonder what else he can do?**

* * *

Irene and Yessica were walking about in the forest in search of boxes; so far they had only found one and they were hoping to find more. They were currently talking about nature, a conversation Irene had started.

"I've always been a fan of hedge mazes." Said Irene. "One time I was lost in one for seven hours; it was the most fun I'd ever had in my life!"

"Weren't you scared?" Asked Yessica in interest.

"Not at all; no plants of any kind can hurt anyone … except perhaps the Mexican fighting tree."

"Why do you like nature so much?" Asked Yessica curiously.

"Why not? Trees are our friends and if we don't protect them then bad things will happen. If I couldn't be with the trees I'd go mad."

"I understand you there." Nodded Yessica. "If I couldn't go swimming for an extended period of time I'd go insane, like the time the beach was closed … though some things are best left forgotten."

"What happened?" Asked Irene eagerly.

"You don't need to know." Said Yessica with a knowing smile.

"Hey look; a box!" Cheered Irene as she pointed ahead to a box just sitting on a pile of leaves and twigs.

"Good job Irene; let's get it." Grinned Yessica as they ran for the box. As they got close they suddenly heard a crying sound.

"Do you hear something Yessica?" Asked Irene as she listened carefully.

"I do; I hear someone crying." Said Yessica with a nod.

"Where's it coming from; I can't tell." Said Irene as she looked around.

"It's coming from somewhere nearby … but I can't pinpoint the location." Said Yessica as she stroked her two pony tails while thinking hard. "Let's grab the box and see if we can find whoever it is who is crying."

Irene nodded in agreement and they both took a step forwards to get the box. As they did the ground beneath them collapsed and they fell downwards; Irene landed on Gary.

"What … what the heck just happened?" Asked Yessica in confusion.

"We've fallen down a hole; good thing I landed on something soft." Said Irene in relief.

"That something would be my spine; get off!" Said Gary from underneath Irene.

* * *

**Confessional- Spine Snap!**

**Gary: That kinda hurt; at least Irene is pretty light or I could have got permanent damage.**

**Irene: I was only in the hole for a few minutes … but it felt like an eternity. Good thing we got out.**

* * *

Irene quickly got off and saw Gary and Raven in the pit as well.

"What are you doing here?" Asked Irene in puzzlement.

"I was talking to Raven, she tried to pick up a box and then we fell down this hole." Explained Gary. "We've been down here for over an hour."

Yessica and Irene noticed Raven sobbing in fear.

"Is she alright?" Asked Yessica in concern. "And … why were you with her anyway?"

"Raven is scared because she's claustrophobic and I was with her because I wanted to ask her a simple question."

"What were you going to ask her?" Questioned Yessica suspiciously.

"That's not really important; we need to think of a way out of here." Said Gary.

"Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed a voice from above.

"Oh great; he's back." Sighed Gary.

Yessica and Irene looked up and saw Wallace and Kasimar looking down on them.

"Sop nice of you to 'drop in' … my hole." Said Wallace with a chuckle while Kasimar punched his arm.

"That joke was stupid; if you're going to tell a joke, make it funny and sexist." Said Kasimar with a growl.

"Way to ruin the drama right hand man." Said Wallace with a sigh before turning back to his victims. "Point is; you've fallen for my trap and you're trapped. I'll get you out when the challenge is over."

"You should just leave them to rot." Said Kasimar with a sneer. "And listening to that girl cry is rather amusing."

"Wait; you dug this hole?" Asked Irene in shock before realization suddenly hit her. "Then that means Vinnie had nothing to do with Fifi falling down this hole in the second challenge! You're evil!

"Why thank you." Bowed Wallace. "Aren't I despicable? Mwuhahahahahaha!"

"What's going on here?" Asked a voice from behind Wallace and Kasimar; they turned and saw Vinnie standing there holding two boxes.

"Drat! Discovered!" Said Wallace with a frustrated snap of his fingers. "Well; I guess we can throw you into the hole."

"Oh really?" Said Vinnie. "You've made a fair few people dislike me because of your 'holy mackerel' and I don't like that, not a bit."

"So what're you gonna do shorty?" Sneered Kasimar before flipping Vinnie the bird. "You're just a short ginger with a metal arm, you can't do anything!"

"You should never under estimate the under dog." Said Vinnie as he raised his metal arm; a second later the sound of a drill echoed around the snowy clearing as Vinnie's metal arm began to spin very quickly and he took a step towards the gruesome twosome.

* * *

**Confessional- Whirrrrr!**

**Vinnie: Yeah; did I forget to mention I have full mental control over my arm. I can spin it like a drill to ward off nasty people; it's also good in wood shop class.**

* * *

"Uh oh; even evil can't beat spinning pincers! Run for it right hand man!" Said Wallace as he threw a sort of bomb to the ground, it exploded and a cloud of smoke arose around Wallace, when it cleared he had vanished. Kasimar looked at Vinnie and then his metal arm.

"I'm not scared of you." Growled Kasimar. "But I'd prefer to smash your face in with a pipe than my fists, and as I don't have one … chow shorty!"

Kasimar ran off while Vinnie put down his boxes and looked into the hole.

"Are you ok down there?" Asked Vinnie in worry.

"Oh no; I love sitting in deep holes, it's *great* fun, can't you see me laughing?" Said Yessica sarcastically.

"Hang on; I'll get you all out." Said Vinnie as like two days ago he ran to a nearby tree and snipped a strong vine off. He lowered it down into the pit and held it tightly.

"Ok; come on up, one at a time please." Said Vinnie. "I can't hold all of you at once."

Down in the hole Raven was in a near cationic state. Gary patted her back and smiled to comfort her.

"Don't worry, you can get out now." Said gary. "Just climb the rope."

"Thank y-y-you." Said Raven as she climbed up the vine as quick as she could. As she reached the top a total of five boxes were throw up. After that up came Irene, followed by Yessica and finally Gary.

"Are … are you all ok?" Asked Vinnie in great concern. "How long were you in that hole; are you cold?"

Yessica and Irene looked at each other and then to Vinnie.

"Vinnie; we owe you an apology." Said Yessica. "You never dug that hole, it was Wallace. He admitted it to us. It was wrong of us to blame you."

"I agree with Yessica; we should have had proof before dishing out the blame, can you forgive us?"

Vinnie looked stunned; a few seconds passed before he smiled.

"Of course I can; I think it's time we put this whole thing behind us." Said Vinnie with a nod. "And I couldn't not forgive you if I tried, I just can't hold a grudge."

Vinnie picked up his two boxes and held them in his organic arm.

"I'm going to go back to camp with these, I'll meet you there; we might even win today."

Vinnie waved with his metal arm and left back to camp. Yessica and Irene both picked up a box. And left another way to look for more. Gary and Raven each picked one up and Gary turned to Raven.

"Are you ok now?" He asked. "That must have been horrible for you."

"It w-w-was." Nodded Raven. "Thanks for t-t-trying to keep m-me c-calm down t-there."

"No problem." Said Gary with a tip of his chef hat. "Any student of the Lord Cuthbert Culinary School looks out for his friends."

"F-f-friends?" Asked Raven in surprise.

"Why not?" Smiled Gary. "And that reminds me, I want to ask you something."

"What i-is it?" Said Raven as she set her full attention to Gary.

"Would you like to join an alliance?" Asked Gary with a wry smile.

"Like … l-l-like Heathers alliance from s-s-season one?" Said Raven in worry.

"No; a nice one, where we look out for each other." Said gary. "It'll be me, you and Hector. We'll just protect each other but when the teams merge and if we're all still here we'll vote together. What d you say?"

Gary extended his hand for a shake. Raven thought for a moment and shook Gary's hand.

"Excellent; I think this is obvious … but if your team loses you should vote for Wallace."

"Don't w-w-worry, I will." Nodded Raven. "I'll s-see you l-l-later; I'll g-get b-b-back to c-camp."

Raven quickly left for camp while gary nodded to himself.

"All's well that ends well." He said with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional- Medal get! Alliance formed!**

**Gary: This turned out very good; Vinnie's name is cleared, my team gets loads of boxes, Raven is in my alliance and Wallace might get voted off … everybody's a winner!**

**Raven: I've n-never been in a-a-an alliance b-before … or a social g-g-group. I h-h-hope I won't r-r-regret it.**

* * *

Tabitha and Uzuri were each carrying a box; they had found them pretty easily. They were at the present moment heading back into camp. Tabitha had a feeling that something big had happened but didn't know what.

"Are you ok Tabitha?" Asked Uzuri. "You look like you've got something on your mind. Does it involve gore?"

Tabitha shook her head.

"No it doesn't; I just … well, I just feel we've missed something important." Said Tabitha.

"How do you know?" Said Uzuri with interest. "Oh! Oh!" Are you a psychic? Can you tell me when ant burning will be an Olympic event?"

* * *

**Confessional- Burn baby burn!**

**Tabitha: Uzuri is a complete freak! She's obsessed with crazy things and she is mental; but I'll keep her around, she's desperate for a friend I think … and I can fake friendship very well. Though I wonder what I missed. I have a sort of sixth sense for gossip and big events. I'll find out what it was somehow.**

**Uzuri: Tabitha is a good friend; she doesn't mind my hobbies and she's a great leader. Maybe she'll join me in ant burning when the snow is gone.**

* * *

"No; I'm not a psychic though that would be pretty interesting. I just have a good sense for when something big has happened."

"I wish I had a good ability like that. The only ability I have is not being scared by SAW. It's actually kinda funny. Teehee!" Said Uzuri brightly.

Tabitha shuddered discreetly and forced a smile.

"That's very impressive; most people run out of the theater screaming. That's pretty special." Lied Tabitha.

"Thank you." Smiled Uzuri. "Looks like some of the others are already here."

Up ahead by their team's tree were Vinnie, Hector and Gary. A fair amount of boxes were next to them, some of them opened, and all three guys were putting decorations on the tree. A fair amount of pinky purple tinsel was draped around the green fur tree along with some orange Christmas lights. It looked very festive indeed.

"Good job guys." Smiled Uzuri as she and Tabitha walked up and put their boxes next to the others.

"Thanks." Said Vinnie as he opened another box which contained a star for the top of the tree.

"How long to we have left to decorate the tree?" Asked Tabitha.

"Just under an hour." Said Hector as he inspected the tree; he seemed satisfied as he turned away to open another box.

"I think we've got this challenge in the bag." Said Gary. "We've got so many boxes of decorations after all."

"Let's hope the tree meets Chris's standards." Said Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional- Tree's have feelings to you know.**

**Vinnie: I really feel happy; I'm proved as innocent and the team is working well together. Christmas really does bring out the best in everyone doesn't it?**

**Uzuri: It was a good day today; playing in the snow is always fun. You're never too old for Christmas!**

* * *

Xaria and Oscar were putting decorations on the Team Grenade tree. Xaria didn't look really happy; she looked more grumpy than usual anyway.

"Why would Chris make a Christmas challenge in July?" Asked Xaria out loud as she hung a blue ba-ball on the tree. "It's a completely stupid idea, veesh Chris is too dumb to die."

"I think you mean too dumb to live." Said Oscar from the other side of the tree. "Chris isn't really known for his intelligence, unless it's on the history of hair gel."

Xaria gave a nod and hung some bells on a few of the branches. She looked at her work and let out a sigh.

"Something wrong?" Asked Oscar as he pulled some lights out of a box.

"I just don't really like Christmas." Grumbled Xaria. "All those kids getting presents and joy; they don't know how lucky they are. Wait, why do you even care?"

"I'm pride myself on being a good sport. I help those in need and you looked a little down."

"I'm not short." Snapped Xaria.

"Looking 'down' means you feel upset." Explained Oscar. "Oh look; here come the others."

Lavender and Mable walked up carrying a number of the festive boxes and set them down. Carlton walked up and suddenly started shaking in fear.

"What is it Carlton?" Asked Oscar. "You scared of decorations?"

"No; I'm scared of the Christmas tree!"

Mable and Xaria simultaneously slapped their foreheads and groaned.

"How can you be scared of a Christmas tree?" Asked Xaria in exasperation.

"They eat people!" Whimpered Carlton. "Right before you can open any presents. It's why my family always has a holly bush instead of a Christmas tree."

"I have no comment on that." Said Xaria flatly as she opened one of the boxes.

"H-hi guys." Greeted Raven as she arrived with a box.

"Hey Raven, you look pale … are you alright?" Asked Carlton.

"I fell d-down a h-hole dug by W-wallace." Explained Raven. "I don't l-l-l-like small spaces; it was quite … s-s-scary."

"I understand; I'm scared of small spaces as well." Agreed Carlton as he edged away from the Christmas tree.

"Wallace trapped you in a hole?" Asked Lavender in shock. "But he's on the same team as you!"

"Well he IS a bad guy." Pointed out Mable.

* * *

**Confessional- Bad as beetroot!**

**Lavender: So Wallace sabotaged his own team? The team I'm on? If we lose it's his turn for the dock of shame! But we may keep this winning streak up yet.**

* * *

Zita had searched around camp for boxes and had found a total of five. She had hung a few decorations on the tree and was making steady progress; of course, it would be easier if her team were there to help her.

"I wonder what's taking everyone so long." Asked Zita out loud. "they've been gone for hours!"

It seemed the wait was up as at that moment Barney dashed up carrying three boxes stacked one of top of the other.

"Ahoy sea lass!" Said Barney as he juggled the boxes. "How goes the decorating?"

"Be careful with those boxes!" Cautioned Zita as she watched Barney juggle them. "They might contain delicate items!"

Barney stopped juggling and put them down.

"Ass you wish." He said with a shrug, the smile never leaving his face. "Need some help?"

"Help would be nice." Said Zita. "While everyone was gone I stole a bit of Chris's hair gel. It was expensive as well so it'll sell for a bit, plus he'll get annoyed."

"Added bonus!" Agreed Barney.

Spider and Andy staggered up gasping for breath; they seemed to have been running after Barney and couldn't keep up. Spider's nose was runny and red. It seemed the cold was not agreeing with him.

"*Sneeze* I *sneeze* want some *sneeze* hot *sneeze* chocolate." Sniffled Spider as he rubbed his red nose.

"You can warm up once the challenge is over." Said Andy. "We've just got to finish decorating the tree."

"Good to see you caught up at last me hearties!" Said Barney with a large smile. "I thought you'd gotten lost."

"Well you're just so full of energy." Said Andy. "We have trouble keeping up with you."

"Did you ever *sneeze* think about *cough* decaffeinated coffee?"

"Oh I don't drink coffee." Explained Barney.

"Hmm." Said Spider in thought.

* * *

**Confessional- I don't drink coffee, I much prefer British high tea.**

**Spider: If that is** *cough*** Barney without** *sneeze*** coffee … I fear to think what ***cough* **he'd be like** *cough*** with coffee…**

* * *

Jimmy, Eleanor and Quana had just found another box and were on their way back to camp. It had taken a while due to some large snow banks and the fact that their elf outfits were rather thin and offered little protection against the weather.

"So can you tell me anything about your way with animals?" Asked Eleanor to Jimmy with great interest. "You summoned an eagle simply by wishing; how is that possible?"

"I really don't know." Said Jimmy honestly. "I was just wishing as a joke to make you two laugh, and then the eagle appeared. But I do know a few things, animals love music."

"Really?" Said Eleanor curiously.

"Absolutely; play them a little tune and they make the cutest squeaks, like Toffee, my guinea pig back home."

"Is toffee orange by any chance?" Asked Eleanor.

"He's orange and black." Said Jimmy. "He's about a year and a half old and I've had him for a year or so."

"You two sure like animals huh." Said Quana. "I myself have a Cavalier King Charles spaniel; her name is Dixie, she sometimes sings along with me."

"Can she play an instrument?" Asked Jimmy eagerly.

"She's not that talented." Laughed Quana. "But I love her anyway."

"Animals are always there for you." Smiled Eleanor. "Even if you can't understand them."

They walked past a few trees and were back in camp. The three teams were working together to decorate their trees. Many decoration boxes were opened and everyone was doing their part.

"Looks like it really is the season to be jolly." Observed Quana as she, Jimmy and Eleanor approached their team and placed their collected boxes down and began opening them.

"Good to see you've made it guys." Said Andy from behind a tangle of lights. "Could someone help me with these lights before I-"

Too late; Andy fell over and was buried under the lights.

"Never mind; I was going to say help me with these lights before I fall over but I just did, can I get a hand?"

"I'll help." Said Eleanor as she picked the lights off Andy which enabled him to get up.

"Thanks Eleanor; I appreciate the help. Out of curiosity what do you think of this challenge?" Asked Andy as he dusted snow off himself.

"It's a little silly celebrated Christmas in July … but it's been good fun." Smiled Eleanor. "Though the elf outfits are a bit much."

"Arrrrr, they make me feel pretty." Declared Barney.

Andy and Eleanor stared at him.

"Just kidding Yaaaaar." Said Barney with a laugh.

"Anyway; I agree, the elf outfits are pushing it … at least the challenge is nearly over. We've got just under five minutes left until the judging."

"Here's to a possible victory." Said Eleanor as she began hanging the lights on the tree.

* * *

**Confessional- Receiving is better than giving.**

**Eleanor: It felt satisfying to decorate the tree; though animals are my interest, I don't mind nature since it's to do with animals. Christmas trees smell nice as well, though they kinda make a mess.**

* * *

Irene and Yessica were running back to camp with a box each; only three minutes were left in the challenge and they were cold and tired. Another victory would be the perfect way to end the day.

"Are we nearly at camp?" Asked Yessica as she panted from all the running.

"Almost!" Replied Irene. "I can see the Christmas trees in the distance!"

And sure enough nearby them just a distance away were almost all of the other campers and the trees. They were heavily decorated and looked perfect … nearly perfect that is.

Yessica and Irene ran up to their team with the boxes and presented them while gasping for breath.

"We've got … some boxes." Smiled Yessica and she breathed deeply.

"Good job girls." Smiled Hector. "Let's open them quickly; we're nearly out of time."

Next to the Team Grenade tree the 'Grenadiers' were sorting through the boxes. They were looking for any last minute decorations that improve their tree.

"Good job everyone." Said Lavender happily. "I think with a tree like this we've secured our third win in a row."

"Don't bet on it." Grumbled Xaria. "Fate loves kicking people in the teeth."

"If you're sure." Said Lavender hesitantly. "Does anybody see any other decorations around?"

"None that match the tree." Said Mable. "I think we're done."

"Good thing too; we've got like half a minute left … if that." Said Oscar with a nod. "But where are Wallace and Kasimar?"

"Good point; I have a bone to pick with Wallace about tapping Raven in the hole."

"Great; b-b-because h-here he comes." Said Raven nervously.

Wallace and Kasimar strode up; neither holding a box.

"Where have you two been?" Asked Oscar suspiciously. "We want a word with you."

"It's about the hole right?" Said Wallace with a smirk.

"You know it is." Steamed Lavender angrily. "You trapped one of our own team! That's terrible; and Raven's claustrophobic!"

"Boo!" Yelled Kasimar behind Carlton.

Carlton screamed and stumbled backwards … he fell right into the tree and it fell over.

"Oh no!" Paled Mable as she made to get the tree back up, it however was too late.

"Time's up!" Yelled Chris into a megaphone turned to maximum power. "Let's see how well you all did.

* * *

**Confessional- Timber!**

**Lavender: We're hosed.**

**Oscar: We're screwed.**

**Carlton: I wanna go home!**

* * *

Chris first walked over to the Team Puzzle tree; the seven puzzlers stood around and awaited Chris's evaluation.

"Hmmm; not bad, blue tinsel, a golden star, green lights, and assorted ba-balls of reasonable quality. Oh; and I see you've put the boxes under the tree to look like presents, I'm impressed. Good job." Congratulated Chris.

Team Puzzle smiled; Chris was impressed, if that was the case they would probably be safe from elimination, but then again maybe not.

Chris strode over to Team Jungle's tree and inspected it; it looked very purple because of all the tinsel.

"I see you like purple." Observed Chris. "And the orange lights are a nice touch. The ba-balls seem to be ok and the star is good. It's a very good tree."

Tabitha smiled; she felt confident they had escaped elimination. It all came down to how well Team Jungle did. She just smiled along with the rest of her team and acted naturally. If they did lose she'd find someone to pin the blame on.

Chris looked at Team Jungles tree and frowned. It was mainly because it had fallen on it's side and some of the decorations had come lose and lay around on the snowy ground.

"Ok; I'm no Christmas expert … but this tree stinks! It's not even standing up! I think it's clear … that you guys lose! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

Team grenade groaned, or in Kasimar's case, snarled. They had just lose for the first time, thus ending the winning streak.

"I think that out of you two teams." Said Chris to Team Puzzle and Team Jungle. "It's a close decision … but the most Christmassy tree belongs to…

.

.

.

.

.

.

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Team Puzzle!"

Team Puzzle cheered and hi fived; they had won their first challenge, what would their reward be?

"As you are the winners, you get a special prize. While Team Grenade goes to the ceremony, you seven will all be enjoying a well prepared Christmas dinner. Enjoy it guys, it'll be back to suffering tomorrow."

"Hooray!" Cheered Andy. "I love turkey!"

Carlton yelped and whimpered as his team looked at him.

"What is it Carlton? Any other fears?" Asked Xaria dryly.

"I'm scared of turkeys." Cowered Carlton.

Xaria slapped her forehead and mumbled something while the others sighed. Kasimar laughed; he enjoyed other people suffering, he was just that nasty.

"So Team Grenade, I'll see you at the ceremony. Pick your favorite loser and meet me there when it gets dark." Said Chris. "Loooo-seeeers!"

Chris laughed and left for another latté while Team Grenade sighed in anger and disappointment, someone was going to have to go … and some campers knew who to vote for.

* * *

**Confessional- Ballot box!**

**Raven: I'm v-voting Wallace, I d-d-don't want to f-fall victim to more o-of his t-traps.**

**Mable: My vote goes to Carlton; he is useless and scared of *everything*. It's actually nice for him, he doesn't really like it here anyway.**

**Lavender: Kasimar was the one who caused Carlton to fall into the tree so he gets my vote. And we can do without him anyway; he's a terrible person by my standards.**

**Carlton: I know exactly who I'm voting for … and that is **(Static cuts him off).

* * *

It had gone dark on Wawanakwa; the stars and moon shone down on the island and made the snow and ice look beautiful. The situation for Team Grenade was however not beautiful. They were on the chopping block and one of them was about to lose. Their winning streak was over and so was their number advantage. Maybe they would get lucky since they would be left with seven members.

The eight 'grenadiers' sat on stumps on logs around the bonfire ceremony area; the oil drum was burning and it was pleasantly warm. They had taken off their elf outfits; Kasimar would have burned his if Chris had forbid him to.

"Well; looks l-like one of u-us is going." Said Raven in an attempt to start conversation.

"Yeah; hopefully it'll be him." Said Lavender as she jerked a thumb at Kasimar. Kasimar just shrugged and smirked.

"Don't bet on it ginger; me and Wallace voted together …and we didn't vote for ourselves." Sneered Kasimar as he flipped Lavender the bird.

Lavender just growled and turned back to focusing her attention on the fire; she had always liked fiery colors like red and orange, especially the former.

Chris arrived with a tray of seven marshmallows; he set them down and looked upon the eight members of Team Grenade. He seemed a little disappointed in them and let out a sigh.

"Team Grenade; it's your first Bonfire Ceremony, and to think I was going to bet on you." Said Chris as he cast his gaze over them. "Any ideas on how you lost?"

"Because of Wallace and Kasimar." Said Lavender promptly. "They're nasty, the type of people this team could do without."

"Yeah." Agreed Oscar from his stump.

"I see; maybe you're right." Said Chris before gesturing to the tray. "This is the Bonfire Ceremony pit. When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow; that means that you are safe from elimination this time. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow is voted off and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers …and you can't come back … *EVER*!"

Chris yelled the last work which made Carlton shiver in fright while a few others jumped a little.

"The first of you to go through is Oscar." Said Chris as he held up a marshmallow.

"Heh, sweet." Said Oscar as he arose from the stump he was sitting and on walked over to Chris to claim his snack of safety.

"The next person to go through tonight is … Raven." Said Chris as he picked up the second marshmallow.

"T-t-thanks." Said Raven shyly but thankfully as she took her marshmallow.

"Mable"

"Lavender"

"Xaria."

.

.

.

.

.

"Kasimar"

Lavender looked shocked and growled. Kasimar just smirked maliciously as he snatched up his marshmallow.

Only one marshmallow was left; Chris held it up for Wallace and Carlton to see. Wallace looked determined and clenched his teeth while Carlton just shivered.

"This is the final marshmallow of the night." Said Chris. "Whoever doesn't get this is out, and must ride the boat of losers to loserville, population four. Tonight's final marshmallow goes to…

.

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Wallace."

Wallace smiled and stood up. He ate his sticky treat while some members of the team looked very surprised.

"Thought you could get rid of me this early?" Asked Wallace. "Well I'm afraid not! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

"Are you sure you counted the votes right?" Asked Oscar in puzzlement.

"I did; there was one vote for Kasimar, three for Wallace and four for Carlton." Explained Chris. "So Carlton, the dock of shame awaits."

Carlton, for the first time on the Island, smiled. He got up and walked to the dock of shame. Once he was in front of the dock he turned to his former team mates.

"Bye everyone; finally the nightmare ends. Now I can go home." Said Carlton with a small wave. He walked down the rest of the dock and boarded the boat. With Chef at the wheel, it drove off into the night.

"Well the rest of you; you've survived your first ceremony; but one of you won't be so lucky next time. You may leave now." Said Chris. "If you'll excuse me; I'm going to get myself a latté."

Chris left with the tray as the remaining seven members of team grenade left back to their cabin.

"I don't know how you survived Wallace." Said Lavender. "But you're going down, one way or another."

"That's what you think; but I intend to win, one way or another." Replied Wallace with an evil smile.

* * *

**Confessional- Evil survives defeat.**

**Wallace: I had a lucky escape tonight … but I'm going to win. No good guys will be left by the end. One at a time they'll walk the dock. Mwuhahahahahaha!**

**Kasimar: Only one vote huh? I think I'm going to last quite a while. Yahahaha!**

**Oscar: With Carlton gone … I'm alone to bunk with Wallace and Kasimar; oh boy, they can't get voted off soon enough.**

* * *

While Team jungle was in their cabin and Team Grenade were heading back to camp; Team Puzzle were having a great time in the mess hall with their Christmas dinner. Crackers had been pulled, turkey was cut and everybody was happy.

"This is great yaaar." Said Barney as he took a big bite out of a turkey leg. "Christmas dinner when it isn't even Christmas. I hope we win more often."

"I hope so too." Said Andy as he ate a large amount of vegetables.

"Why do you eat so many vegetables Andy?" Asked Zita. "Are you a vegetarian?"

"Nope; I eat meat, I just want to be fit for if I manage to become an astronaut." Explained Andy as he shoveled some broccoli into his mouth and swallowed. "Though I hate sprouts."

"Who doesn't?" Asked Eleanor.

"Sprouts taste *cough* like death itself." Said Spider while taking out his inhaler and breathing with it.

"Hey guys; look what I've found." Said Jimmy excitedly.

"What is it?" Asked Quana with interest.

"Mistletoe." Said Jimmy as he held some up. "Which two of you want to smooch?"

Everyone was silent, Quana blushed a little. Barney stood up with a grin.

"I'll do it; who wants to be my sea queen?" Asked Barney eagerly.

He was met with silence; he sat back down and frowned.

"Am I really that ugly? Is it my hat?" Asked Barney.

* * *

**Confessional- We have no lips.**

**Spider: Jimmy means well, he's ***cough*** not got any mean ***sneeze*** in him. But no girls would want ***gag*** to kiss me, no girl wants** *cough*** my germs. I wonder how ***sneeze***much longer I'll last.**

* * *

Chris stood on the snowy dock and smiled to the camera.

"And that's the end of day four. Carlton is gone and Wallace has been spared. With Carlton off the island the level of screams and wet pants will drop a huge amount." Said Chris as he slurped his Latté. "Who will be next to walk the dock of shame? And what will Wallace do next? Find out next time on total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

**Votes**

**Oscar- Wallace**

**Lavender- Kasimar**

**Mable- Carlton**

**Kasimar- Carlton**

**Wallace- Carlton**

**Carlton- Carlton**

**Xaria- Wallace**

**Raven- Wallace**

**Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton.**

* * *

And that's the end of day four and Christmas time on Wawanakwa. Carlton is gone; his ridiculous phobias were funny but he offered little to the story. But you'll see him again very soon...

**Next Time:** The losers are interviewed about their time on TDL by two who didn't make in onto the season.


	9. Total Ousted Alphabet 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama island, Action or World Tour. They belong to teletoon and Cartoon Network. i also do not own the alpahbet theme, that belongs to Frank15, so thank you to frank for that. i do however own every single one of the twenty six contestants in this story. I also own the two aftermath hosts you are about to meet.

**Warning:** This story contains bullying, bad language, some nasty people, hair related intolerance, sexism to both genders and pretzel related fears. Nothing m rated though so don't worry.

**Pairings:** Not telling at the moment.

**Poll:** I have put a new poll up; and this one is pretty funny so it might be worth a look.

**Note:** Here it is; the first aftermath. I think thsi chapter is really good. the personalities of the early losers are more developed and fifi's past is explained, as well as why she doesn't like vinnie. This is the begginging of the resolution to that conflict. read on and enjoy!

Here we go again!

* * *

Lights shone down onto the stage of a large room. It had many seats set up, each with some nameless person on it that each has no importance to this story. On the stage was some furniture. To the right was a large sofa with three rows, each with increasing height on them. To the left was a fluffy sea green arm chair that looked very comfortable. In the center of the stage was a pair of armchairs; one was red and fluffy while the other was orange and made of leather. Sitting in them were a teenage male and female.

The male had tidy black hair under a fedora. He wore a detective's jacket with an orange T-shirt underneath. Below that was a pair of green denim jeans. His shoes were brown and shiny. He wore a belt that had a magnifying glass, a notebook and a finger print brush on it.

The female was a little short in height. She wore a purple head band in her long black hair that had a high pony tail in it. Her shirt was orange and over it was a comfortable purple cotton coat. Her trousers were tanish yellow and her shoes were blue with Velcro. She was playing on a Nintendo DS.

"We're rolling." Said a camera man as he aimed the camera at the pair on the stage.

The two on the stage looked up and smiled for the camera.

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Said the male with a wave.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Said the female with a smile.

"No relation." Added Eddie with a laugh.

"I thought we agreed that joke was lame." Said Sasha as she returned to her game.

"I never promised not to say it." Replied Eddie.

"Fair enough." Said Sasha with a shrug.

"Hello viewers at home." Waved Eddie. "And welcome to the first installment of Total Ousted Alphabet. This is a place safe from Chris Maclean and his scary Chef sidekick. We're here for one reason and one reason only; care to tell the viewers what it is Sasha?"

"Sure; we're here to interview the contestants that have been brutally voted off. We will ask them questions about their time on the island, what they thought of their experience, that sort of thing." Said Sasha without looking up from her game.

"Do you think you could put the game down for a while?" Asked Eddie with a raised eyebrow.

"But I've nearly beaten my high score." Insisted Sasha.

"What game is that anyway?" Asked Eddie in curiosity.

"It's called Dash Dingo. You play as a Dingo with a hard kick and save Australia from some guy with a bad haircut."

"You'll have to show me the games you play sometime." Said Eddie with a nod.

"Maybe." Said Sasha as she paused the game and put the DS beside her on the arm of the chair.

"But back to the point; we're going to interview the losers … and since this is the first aftermath we're going to do justice to those you hardly got to see." Explained Eddie with a smile. "For example, you hardly got to see Patch; he'll be here today along with Fifi, Daisy, Carlton and Nakia."

"They weren't eliminated in that order." Pointed out Sasha as she relaxed in her chair.

"True." Nodded Edie in acknowledgement. "But that will make the audience watch the reruns and if more people watch the show, we get paid more. It's win-win."

"Fair point." Smiled Sasha as she faced the camera. "Now you may be wondering what we are doing here. And before you ask; we have absolutely no relation to Chris Maclean, if I did I'd find a good place to hide. I and Eddie auditioned for Total Drama Letterz … but we didn't get in. But the producers decided they wanted an aftermath section late in the planning stage so they put the names of all those who didn't make it on into a raffle … and we won."

"Well said my friend." Clapped Eddie. "Today we're going to dig up the dirt in a detective way that would make Poirot proud."

"Who?" Asked Sasha in confusion.

"I take it you don't read Agatha Christie?" Asked Eddie with a smile.

"I'm not too interested in detective stuff." Shrugged Sasha. "Every detective game is pretty … crap."

"Exactly the opposite of every detective movie; like my collection of eighty five detective DVD's." Said Eddie. "But enough about us, I bet all of you out there want to meet our guests today right?"

"We'll be interviewing them in the order they were voted off so get ready for the first guest." Said Sasha as she gestured to the audiences left of the stage. "She had a head teacher for a dad, she threatened to tattle on the other contestants, she is a straight A student and she wore her school uniform to the competition … it's Daisy!"

From the side of the stage out walked Daisy; she didn't look too pleased; the audiences boo's proved she wasn't too popular. She raised her nose snootily and sat down on the sea green arm chair.

"Daisy; the teachers pet, glad to have you on our show." Greeted Eddie as he held out his hand for a shake.

"You've got as much hope for me shaking your hand as I have for getting an F." Said Daisy rudely.

"Ok; if you're sure." Said Eddie as he withdrew his hand looking slightly insulted.

"So Daisy; you're a teachers pet I hear. What school do you go to?" Asked Sasha.

"I go to Oskelo Academy; it's a private school with the highest standard of education." Smiled Daisy smugly. "As my father is the principle I got automatic entry."

"Isn't that a little unfair?" Asked Eddie.

"Who cares?" Smiled Daisy foully. "I'm just lucky I'm so popular and well liked."

"If you're so well liked then why were you voted off so early?" Asked Sasha craftily.

"I don't know; but it's so humiliating! I deserved that money but evidently the others viewed me as a threat and ganged up on me. At least I was the second to lose and not the first."

Eddie and Sasha exchanged glances and looked at Daisy.

"Actually." Began Eddie uneasily.

"You _were_ the first voted off." Finished Sasha bravely.

"What?" Asked Daisy in shock. "I wasn't first; it was that fat slob!"

"Well believe us, you were the first one gone." Replied Sasha.

"Prove it." Said Daisy as he turned her nose up and crossed her arms.

"Ok; fair enough … we will." Said Eddy as he signaled someone off stage.

An expensive wide and flat screen TV was lowered down from above. The screen flickered to life and began showing a video.

* * *

_Chef Hatchet was dragging Daisy down the dock of shame as she was kicking and screaming; a second later he tossed her on board before getting on and going to the controls. An intern threw her belongings onto the boat._

_A moment later Patch boarded the boat and said boat sped off into the night._

* * *

Daisy looked at the screen and back to Eddie and Sasha. She didn't look happy but wasn't brutally angry either.

"So? That didn't prove anything." Snapped Daisy.

"Well if you look closely … you were the first one on the boat of losers. And in section forty seven paragraph four line two of your contract; it clearly states 'in the case of a double elimination the first contestant to board the boat of losers is considered to have been voted off before the other." Explained Sasha. "So really … you were the first voted off."

Daisy was silent for a few seconds; then she bubbled in anger.

"What? I was voted of first?" Screamed Daisy in fury. "That's not fair! Wait until my father hears about this!"

Eddie, Sasha and the audience covered their ears until Daisy finished her rant. When she finished she was visibly steaming.

"So … time for another question!" Said Eddie quickly. "What did you think about your time on the Island?"

Daisy breathed in and relaxed a little.

"It sucked; everyone hated me just because I'm better than them! I was … voted off first!" Said Daisy with a noticeable shudder. "I didn't even end up on a team; if I had been given the chance I could have easily won, but I'll get them back."

"So … you're kind of annoyed at losing then?" Asked Sasha.

"Do I look happy?" Asked Daisy dryly.

"I guess that was a stupid question." Admitted Sasha.

"Only as stupid as you." Smiled Daisy.

"I think we should move on." Said Eddie. "Next question; who do you want to win out of the remaining contestants?"

"Absolutely none." Replied Daisy stiffly. "They don't deserve to be in the competition. They're dumb and uneducated."

"Actually some of them are pretty smart." Pointed out Eddie. "Spider is actually pretty intelligent if you ignore his illness; and Hector is known as 'The Intellect'."

"Whatever; they're all trailer trash." Said Daisy with an eye roll.

"I think it's time for some fan mail." Announced Sasha as she took out a trio of letters.

"That's it?" Said Eddie in surprise.

"Daisy isn't too popular." Shrugged Sasha. "Comes with being a brat and being voted off first."

"I demand you treat me with respect." Growled Daisy. "Your principles are a phone call away."

"Oh; I'm _so_ scared." Scoffed Eddie. "I'm not scared of you; anyway, first letter Sasha?"

"Ok; here's the first one." Said Sasha as she opened the message. "Dear Daisy; you're a self centered tattle tale and I don't like you, from Greg."

"How dare he say that!" Said Daisy in anger. "Who does he think he is?"

"Moving along to the next message." Said Sasha as she opened the second letter. "Dear Daisy; you are smart, no doubt about it, but you are as likable as Petunia Dursley, you're such a tattler you might as well be known as Tattle Cattle! From Kim. Sorry to see you're not very well liked Daisy."

"They're just jealous of my superior intellect and popularity." Shrugged Daisy smugly.

"Is the final letter anything positive?" Asked Eddie. "I don't want people to get the feeling everyone hates Daisy. No matter how mean someone of a TV show is they will always have fans, even Umbridge has fans."

"This letter looks nice." Said Sasha as she began to read the final letter. "Dear my darling Daisy. Don't let those brats upset you, you're still a winner to me. I'm sure you'll get a second chance and you can crush the opposition. Keep fighting and you will be rewarded. From your loving farther. Looks like your dad is on your side."

Daisy was silent and let out a smile.

"Well Farther is always on my side in everything; if someone annoys me, he gives them detention. If I want to join a club, he puts me in it. And if I want to go into the canteen early … so I shall do." Smiled Daisy. "It's good to know I have at least one big fan."

"Well Daisy; that's all the time we have for you; could you take a seat on the right of the stage?" Asked Eddie.

"But I'm not done speaking yet." Said Daisy sternly. "And I need to have my opinions known."

"We've got to keep the show moving along; we don't have an infinite time slot." Explained Sasha.

Daisy growled as she got up and sat on the large three row sofa.

"Our next contestant swam in hot sauce, tried to eat a fly, farted a lot and likes food; give it up for Patch!"

Patch walked out from backstage while waving to the crowd; the applause was minimal but there was no boo's.

"Welcome Patch; take a seat on the chair." Said Eddie with a polite greeting.

"What chair?" Asked Patch.

"This chair." Said Eddie.

"My chair?" Replied Patch.

"Your chair?" Asked Sasha.

"His chair." Said Eddie.

"What chair?" Asked Patch again.

"That chair!" Sighed Sasha.

"No you're a chair!" Said Patch firmly.

"I'm a chair?" Asked Sasha in confusion.

"An armchair?" Said Patch.

"What the heck is going on?" Yelled Eddie. "Patch; just sit on *that* chair, right *there*!"

"Why didn't you say so Hotdog?" Smiled Patch as he sat down.

Eddie and Sasha looked at each other in confusion but quickly turned back to Patch.

"So Patch; I hear you like food." Asked Sasha Rhetorically

"Yes I do." Nodded Patch as he took out a chocolate bar and took a bite.

"Care to tell us why?" Persisted Sasha.

"Well why not? It's tasty! And exploding on the can after a bean burrito feels *great*."

Eddie gagged and held his gut while Sasha blanched and turned slightly green.

"Well … toilet humor aside … I guess your favorite video games would be something like cooking mama or order up." Said Sasha as she moved the conversation onwards.

"I don't play video games … they're too hard and give me a headache." Said Patch as he held his head.

"Do you like anything other than farts and food?" Asked Eddie.

"… I like spoons." Said Patch dumbly.

"Err … I see." Sighed Eddie. "So what was it like leaving so early?"

"You can't win them all, right?" Shrugged Patch as he took out another chocolate bar. "I just auditioned to taste Chef Hatchets food … it was yummy in my tummy!"

"Don't you care you lost out on a million?" Questioned Sasha in disbelief.

"Nope; money means little when food is involved!" Smiled Patch.

"So … you don't really care that you were voted off?" Blinked Eddie in surprise.

"Not really." Shrugged Patch.

"What a loser!" Laughed Daisy snidely.

"Well you're here as well." Pointed out Sasha. "You could be a little nicer."

"Why bother; I always get what I want no matter what my attitude." Smiled Daisy very meanly.

"But back to you Patch." Said Eddie seriously. "You were voted off on the first day and as such didn't join a team; if you could have been on a team which would it be?"

"Team Jungle; they have the Chef don't they?" Said Patch as he let out a burp.

"They do … but … in fact, I think we've asked enough, don't you agree Sasha?" Asked Eddie.

"I certainly do; so Patch, before we move on it's time for your fan mail; though there isn't much." Sad Sasha as she took out a small bag of mail. It was about the size of a flour bag but had more mail than Daisy though.

"Ok; this message is from weightwatchers … I thin we should ignore that one." Said Daisy as she screwed up the letter and tossed it away as she took another out. "Here's another; it's from a guy called Timmy; Dear Patch, when you fart I feel the ground shake! You're just like Owen … and I'm ok with that. To bad you lost, you could've been funny."

"I do know some jokes." Said Patch.

"Why don't you tell us one?" Suggested Eddie.

"Ok; did you hear about the cheese that had a headache? He didn't feel very gouda!" Said Patch before laughing.

"Any none food related jokes?" Sighed Eddie.

"Nope!" Laughed Patch.

"Here's one more." Said Sasha as she opened another envelope. "Dear Patch; do you know lucky? From Daphne … I don't get it."

"Who's lucky? Is he still in the game?"

"No; it's a reference to a hundred and one Dalmatians." Explained Eddie. "A big part of my childhood besides Basil the great mouse detective."

Eddie sighed in happy remembrance as Patch picked his nose.

"Well Patch; it's been, err, *lovely* talking to you … but we need to move on, could you go and sit by Daisy?" Asked Sasha nicely.

"Okey dokie sokie." Nodded Patch with his signature dumb smile.

"Oh no way! I don't want that slob next to me!" Whined Daisy.

Patch seemed not to listen; he sat down next to Daisy and burped again. Daisy gagged and shuffled a distance away from the fat teen.

"Well then everyone; it looks like it's time for our third guest." Said Sasha with a smile. "Take it away Eddie."

"That I will Sasha; our third guest supports woman's rights, has a pink afro, fell in a hole, seems to hate men and is an all out feminist, give it up for Fifi!"

Fifi walked out from backstage with an unpleasant look on her face. A lot of the audience booed; but a small group of females at the front dressed in pink cheered very loudly. Fifi smiled and waved to them as she sat down.

"So Fifi; how are y-." Began Eddie before Fifi interrupted him.

"If I'm going to be interviewed then make it by someone actually competent, a woman for example." Growled Fifi.

"Could you help me out here Sasha?" Asked Eddie meekly.

"Sure; so Fifi, how are you?" Asked Sasha.

"I feel fine." Smiled Fifi, switching moods instantly. "Playa des Losers really is a wonderful place. Good food, no Chris and more females than males."

"So you don't mind being voted off then?" Said Sasha in amazement. "You seemed a _tad_ upset when you were voted off."

"Of course I mind. I lost out on a load of money! And at the rate girls are being eliminated they'll be another guy winner. If that happens I might go insane." Growled Fifi. "But it's only a matter of time before the guys go down one by one."

"So Fifi." Began Eddie once more before Fifi snarled.

"I'm not going to be interviewed by you! You're just like other men, dumb and helpless without a woman!"

"Looks like you're going to be doing this interview Sasha." Sighed Eddie as he relaxed and tipped his fedora over his eyes.

"So Fifi; could you tell us when you first became a feminist?" Asked Sasha with interest. "We want to know what inspired you to take a stand for woman's rights."

"Why sure; I'll tell you." Smiled Fifi. "It goes back to when I was ten years old; at school I saw a group of guys harassing a girl and calling her things like a 'breeder' and a 'slave'. I listened some more and realized they weren't bullying her because she did anything … but because she was a woman. From then on I stood up for my equals; all of which are better than any man."

"That explains a bit … but why did you die your hair pink?" Asked Sasha in puzzlement.

"Oh that; it's simply because pink is my favorite color … and the most girly color bar none. I needed to represent myself as a feminist somehow." Explained Fifi casually. "Though as you can tell from my streaks; my normal hair color is black."

"Aside from feminism and generally, well, 'bashing men', what do you do in your spare time?"

"That's an easy one; I surf the web, do my hair and eat mint ice cream sundaes."

"But isn't strawberry the most pink?" Asked Sasha.

"Well; I do like more than just pink. And it's more for the taste than the color." Said Fifi with a laugh.

"I agree; personally I like honeycomb ice cream the most." Said Sasha as she smiled. "It's sweet and crunchy, and it's great as a snack between rounds at a gaming competition."

"I would have thought gaming was a man thing." Said Fifi with a sudden dry tone. "Whose side are you on?"

"I'm a girl, yes, but I don't hate guys. There are some I could've done without meeting; but equally as many girls who pick on me as well." Said Sasha wisely.

"A little naïve; but if that's how you are." Shrugged Fifi mildly.

"You weren't in the contest for long; though you did meet everyone. If you could date any guy who would it be?" Asked Sasha cautiously.

"I wouldn't date any guy! They're all filthy pigs who can't clean up after themselves, they can't get by without a women's help. They shouldn't even be allowed out of the bedroom, let alone the house!"

"So … you're a lesbian then." Said Sasha in surprise.

Fifi looked stunned and growled.

"Of course I'm not! I just want to remain single, no man deserves me."

"I've got a question." Said Eddie as he turned to Fifi; he looked quite offended and angry. "Why do you hate men so much?"

"Why shouldn't I?" Snapped Fifi with a snarl; he bad mood was back. "Men have kept women downtrodden throughout history, just because we're girls! They think they're so big and powerful but they're nothing! They imprisoned and force fed women who didn't obey them and ignored out polite requests. They can act sexist to us but when a woman is sexist to them they can't stand it! Pathetic!"

"That doesn't really answer my question." Replied Eddie bravely and coolly. "You've only just met me and you've already got a hatred for me. And on the Island you were pretty nasty to Vinnie! I'm not saying he was innocent, but why did you target him in particular?"

"I don't have to answer." Said Fifi smugly as she crossed her arms superiorly.

"According to the contract you signed you do." Said Sasha. "I'm not a man and thus am not the target, but you're angering me as well."

"So?" Said Fifi rudely.

"Just tell us; why do you hate men? And why Vinnie in particular?"

"Loser!" Yelled a man in the audience.

"Sexist!" Snarled another man.

"Bin Laden!" Jeered a Libby looking teen.

Fifi looked at Eddie and Sasha, then at the audience looking at her, most of which looked pretty angry. The cameras were pointed at her and some of the cameramen were glaring. Fifi looked at them all and sighed as a small tear escaped her eye, Eddie noticed this.

"Oh please don't cry. I didn't mean to upset you like that." Said Eddie quickly.

"Shut up." Said Fifi angrily yet a little sadly. "Why do you even care?"

"I'm not going to upset you just for fun; I'm not Kasimar." Said Eddie. "We just want to know the reason behind your attitude."

"So what? It's not like you really care! And besides; why would females get offended by what I say?"

"Well." Began Sasha. "I got offended because I happen to have a little brother called Thomas, he's just six years old … and according to what you are saying he is a filthy pig who is pretty much a waste of space, that's reason enough for me to be pissed. But we want to know why you have these views; it's got to be something other than natural hatred for males."

"Who cares?" Sneered Daisy with an amused grin. "She's just a loser like pretty much everyone else!"

Sasha breathed deeply and lifted part of the arm of her chair; it revealed a number of buttons. She pressed one and stayed silent. A second later a large amount of what looked like blue jelly fell on Daisy which completely ruining her cloths.

"My cloths! My hair!" Screamed Daisy as she got up and ran off backstage wailing like a baby.

"She seems upset." Said Patch from his seat.

"Serves her right." Shrugged Sasha before getting serious yet gentle again. "So Fifi; are you ready to explain?"

Fifi was silent, then she sighed and nodded.

"Ok; the reason I don't like men is … well, a combination of things that have happened. As I said when I was on the show, my farther left my mum when she was pregnant with me. He never answered calls or anything. And then there's the jocks at school; they never let any girls play any sports … and the head of the sports department doesn't have any sports for girls and he actually seems to dislike females. And of course … one guy at the school is as sexist as middle aged men. He just insults girls all the time; he even got his buds to join in laughing at us girls over trivial things. I guess … I just snapped."

Everyone in the studio was silent; a few people in the audience cried. Sasha and Eddie looked stunned.

"Oh my." Said Eddie in horror and shock. "After hearing all that … it's understandable really. Wow; I don't … know what to say, maybe I should start with sorry for getting angry at you."

"I guess … I could, forgive you … once." Sniffled Fifi; Patch was crying in his seat and while Daisy was backstage it goes without saying she wouldn't care too much.

"That's terrible." Said Sasha in shock. "Why would people do that? It's like when Razorbeard took over an innocent world and reduced it to slavery."

Fifi and Eddie looked at her in confusion.

"Oh, sorry." Said Sasha in embarrassment. "I sometimes compare peoples past's to video games, my bad."

"That explains a lot; I get it now." Said Eddie with a sympathetic and kind smile. "But there's one thing I don't understand. Why did you hate Vinnie so much? You targeted him a little more than the other guys … any reason why?"

"Well … looking back on it … it's rather pathetic … but the sexist bully at school; he has red hair and a hat like Vinnie's, I guess it just made me think Vinnie was like a clone of him, in a way." Sighed Fifi in depression.

"That's understandable too; and judging by some of Vinnie's confessionals … he feels guilty for being mean and a little stupid as well." Smiled Sasha.

"Really?" Smiled Fifi.

"Definitely." Nodded Sasha. "Now however it's time for your fan mail … if you want it; these letters came before what just happened so they may not be … nice."

"That's ok; I'll hear a few." Said Fifi guiltily.

Eddie took out a sack of letters and took a handful out.

"Let's see this one. Fifi, you are a … ok, never mind." Said Eddie as he tore it into shreds and threw the pieces on the floor. "Maybe this one. You're a nasty … forget that as well."

Eddie opened a few more letters and growled in anger.

"Are there any nice letters here?" He asked aloud as he opened another. He read it silently to himself before smiling. "This one isn't bad at all. Dear Fifi; you may be a little sexist and flawed … but everyone has their flaws. I can tell that beyond that you are a nice person; I'm on your side. And keep fighting for women's rights. We'll be equal someday. From Matilda."

Fifi smiled; a real smile, not the usual sneer or smug smile.

"Well Fifi." Said Sasha. "Talking to you has been enlightening … but it's time for our next guest, could you sit next to Patch?"

"Of course." Smiled Fifi as she got up and sat down next to Patch. The audience clapped for her and she waved.

"That was nice wasn't it?" Said Sasha.

"I agree; looks like the Fifi we knew wasn't the real Fifi at all." Nodded Eddie. "Another mystery solved."

"It's time for our fourth guest of the night." Announced Sasha to the audience. "She loves her hair a little too much, picked on a sick kid, hates bad hair days and won immunity in the first challenge; give it up for Nakia!"

Nakia strutted onto the stage while brushing her hair; a lot of the audience booed; there was virtually no cheer. Nakia seemed not to care; she was too focused combing her hair to notice.

Nakia sat down and smiled at Sasha and Eddie.

"So you two are the hosts of this show are you?" Asked Nakia. "Not bad … but you wouldn't win a hair competition, nope, not a chance."

"Err … thanks." Said Eddie coldly.

"I'd rather not interview her." Said Sasha. "She wasn't very … nice, at all. Could you do the honors Eddie?"

"If I must." Sighed Eddie. "So Nakia; you like your hair do you?"

"Well duh." Said Nakia with an eye roll. "It's the best thing about me; it puts me above the masses. Isn't it just loooovely?"

"Well … I guess so." Shrugged Eddie.

"Is that the best compliment you can come up with?" Growled Nakia. "Don't … diss … my … HAIR!"

"Ok, sorry!" Said Eddie while raising his hands a little. "But you are aware it's just hair, it doesn't determine who you are as a person."

"It so does; it makes me popular and beloved. Everyone loves me!" Baosted Nakia

"If you're so beloved then why were you voted off?" Asked Fifi with a wry smile.

"Shut it! You're one to talk, you did worse than me and you're hair is like pink puke!" Snapped Nakia.

"Can you give me a hand Sasha?" Asked Eddie to his co-host, help did not arrive as Sasha was back to her game and seemed pretty focused. "Ah great."

"So; want to ask more about me?" Smiled Nakia as she brushed her hair again.

"Ok; err … what do you like doing in your spare time?"

"That's an easy one; brushing my hair, styling my hair, posing for hair magazines and putting ribbons in my hair." Replied Nakia. Eddie blinked and sighed.

"I should have made my meaning clearer; I meant what do you like to do that *doesn't* involve your hair in any way."

"Oh, that's tough one … and I didn't study." Thought Nakia. "Well; I like being pampered and adding to my collection of combs from around the world."

"Pampered you say; are you from a rich family?" Asked Eddie with a bit of interest.

"Oh yes! My family gets the best of everything; my mum says I'm destined for greatness because of my lovely hair. I'm the most popular at school as well."

"How did you get to be the most popular?" Inquired Eddie. "Something tells me it wasn't getting straight As."

"Of course not! Lessons are gay!" Snapped Nakia, she seemd very angry once again. "It's because I'm pretty and much better than the peasants of the school. Almost everyone caters to my needs just to touch my hair for half a second! Those who don't … become outcasts."

Nakia calmed back down and brushed her hair again. Eddie thought what to ask next. There had to be a question that wouldn't have a hair related answer.

"You managed to get through the first two challenges and you ended up on Team Puzzle; what did you think of your team mates?" Asked Eddie in hopes the answer wouldn't over use the word 'hair'. "Best friends forever or best friends for never?"

"Urgh! They were so ugly!" Whined Nakia. "Barney's a pirate wannabe who not only has bad hair but is a complete weirdo. I could outcast him in an instant at school. Jimmy … a little kid with a little future. Zita is just ugly, enough said. Andy, I don't really mind him but short hair was so five years ago. Eleanor's blond and green die look may be cute to her … but we all know she's a little weirdo with a love for creepy rats. Quana has potential to be popular … but she makes friends with the wrong sort. And she had the nerve to call me shallow? What a dummy!"

"I guess you don't really like your team then." Said Eddie; that answer contained more about hair than he had hopes. "But you didn't mention Spider; what about him?"

Nakia suddenly started to turn red as she clenched her fists and growled. Eddie knew she was going to have a melt down.

"_Three … two … one_." Though Eddie.

"Don't mention that abomination." Growled Nakia. "I don't know how he's still in the competition; he's sick, stupid and has the absolute _worst_ hair I've ever seen! I don't know what the others were thinking when they picked him over me! He'd better watch his step."

"Spider is actually a pretty solid guy behind his sickness." Said Eddie firmly. "He's smart and has an interest and knowledge of music and art. You're just a little … prejudice to him. And it's kind of pathetic to hate him because of his hair to be honest."

"Don't talk to ME like that; I'm Nakia Sommo Baxter! I and my hair deserve respect! Spider may have survived for now … but I'll get him back, him and all the team as well for I **never** give up."

"But what did Spider actually do to you?" Asked Eddie in puzzlement.

"He had the nerve to be in my presence with his awful hair! That should warrant a prison sentence!"

"Well, moving on from that, I think it's time for some fan mail." Said Eddie as he took out a small bag of mail. "There are some people who really want to speak to you."

"Let's hear it then; I love being adored." Smiled Nakia as she returned to her spoiled happy attitude.

"This one is from Selena. Dear Nakia; you should have taken Heathers place last season … that way you would have gotten your hair shaved! You give rich girls a bad name! And stop picking on people because of their hair, its pathetic!"

"What nerve." Snarled Nakia, angry once more. "And wishing my hair to be shaved? That's awful, what a freak!"

"Ok … next letter. It's from someone known as 'The Steel Avenger'. He or she says; Nakia, I don't know if your attitude is just an act but quit it! You're a spoiled brat who has no idea how the world works! You have pretty much no fans; and let me tell you … you are boring!"

Nakia left eye twitched and she shuddered in anger before smiling.

"Me, boring? As if!" Smirked Nakia. "I'm the most interesting person there is; much more than the other's put together."

"I think we'll just have one more. This one comes from a girl called Fiona. Nakia; you may feel high and mighty now but once everyone sees the real you you'll have nobody. There's a storm coming and you've got no umbrella, prepare for a big wake up call, _big_ time. You don't seem too popular huh?" Asked Eddie.

"They're just jealous that I have perfect hair and they are just losers." Shrugged Nakia rudely.

"Well Nakia; it's been … ok to talk to you; but please move next to Fifi and Patch, there is still one guest left tonight."

"Fine; oh, and a tip. Get a haircut, yours is hideous." Smiled Nakia as she resumed brushing while she got up and sat next to Fifi.

"YES!" Cheered Sasha in excitement.

"What is it?" Asked Eddie as he turned to her.

"I just beat my high score." Grinned Sasha hugely.

"Good job … though platformers aren't really my thing; I prefer the Professor Layton series." Said Eddie as he stretched out on his chair.

"We've got one last guest to interview tonight … though he might get stage fright. Should I introduce him?" Asked Sasha.

"Go for it." Nodded Eddie.

"Our final guest of the night was the last to arrive on the Island, got electrocuted, screamed a lot, wet himself about twice, is afraid to go out at night, afraid to go out in the day … and let's be honest, he's just plain afraid. Give a round of applause for Carlton!"

Carlton pepped out from backstage to a small applause and _very_ slowly and fearfully made his way to the interview seat. He sat down and relaxed… for 0.098 seconds. After laying eyes on Eddies chair he screamed in fear.

"Way to start the interview." Sighed Eddie. "What's scaring to this time Carlton?"

"Your chair … it's red." Whimpered Carlton.

"I can't help that; Sasha and I didn't choose the chairs. But it's better than sitting in it right?"

"I guess so." Shivered Carlton. "But why does there have to be an audience, I have stage fright."

"That doesn't surprise me." Sighed Sasha. "Having an audience is kinda the point for an interview. Just relax and let go of your fears for a few minutes."

"Ok …I think I can do that." Said Carlton as he tried to look away from the fluffy red armchair.

"So Carlton; you were the first of your team to lose and the fifth overall, how does that feel?" Asked Sasha.

"To be honest … I was relieved. The nightmare ended and I escaped that terrible island. To tell the truth … I actually voted for myself at the bonfire ceremony."

"You actually threw away your chances at the million?" Asked Eddie in disbelief. "You do realize that if you hadn't voted for yourself and you'd voted for Wallace then he'd have been the one going home. Aren't you gutted?"

"Gutted? AAAAARGH!" Screamed Carlton as he covered his eyes in fear.

Eddie slapped his forehead and Sasha sighed.

"He means aren't you disappointed?" Explained Sasha calmly.

"Well … no, not really. I never wanted to be here. My parents signed me up so I could toughen up. It didn't work too well."

"Uh huh." Nodded Sasha with a small smile.

"So Carlton; you're actually happy you've lost?" Said Eddie with wide eyes.

"You know it." Said Carlton nervously. "I wouldn't have lasted there. But at the Playa I can relax and stay in my room, away from the dangers of the outside world."

"You seemed quite scared all the time; is there any reason why you are so, well, yellow?" Asked Sasha curiously.

"I just don't like scary things, why can't life be soft and cuddly?" Asked Carlton wimpily.

"Because then there would be no excitement." Said Sasha smartly. "It would be as boring as a pretzel."

"Excitement and pretzels scare me." Whimpered Carlton.

Sasha, Eddie, the peanut gallery and the audience were silent. Carlton was _actually_ afraid of pretzels? That … was really lame.

"Now that you've been eliminated … who would you like to see win?" Asked Eddie. "You can't have been scared of everyone there."

"Well … maybe Raven; she was quiet and shy like me. I'm not scared of her. I just hope Kasimar doesn't win, he was scary."

"That we can agree on." Nodded Sasha with a sigh. "That Kasimar."

"He's a dick." Chimed in Eddie as the audience laughed.

"That seems to be a sort of running gag." Pondered Sasha. "But back to you Carlton. What was your favorite challenge?"

"Easy, None of them! They were terrifying and I may need therapy to recover." Cowered Carlton.

"One more question; did you _like_ anyone?" Asked Eddie slyly.

"No way! Love scares me!"

"Everything does you coward." Laughed Nakia though she was silenced by a smack on the back of the head by Fifi.

"I think it's time for your fan mail." Said Sasha as she produced a bag of letters and opened one of them. "This first one is from Hailey. Carlton; if you had sex the girl couldn't get pregnant as you haven't grown a pair, seriously, man up! Ok, that wasn't a nice letter."

Sasha tossed the letter away and pulled out another one.

"This one was sent by a guy called Gus; Carlton, you give guys a bad name. You're a girl! Wow; not nice either."

"That's why I didn't like guys … and there are still an amount I don't like." Said Fifi with a hint of anger.

"I think there is time for just one more letter." Said Sasha as she rooted about in the bag and took out an envelope. She opened it and began reading. "Dear Carlton, you should go on Fear factor and give us a laugh. You'd wet your pants in fear and I'd wet myself in laughter! Signed Mac. Hmmm; you don't seem to popular, sorry Carlton."

"That's ok; publicity is scary." Said Carlton with a tiny smile.

"And with that … I think we're out of time." Said Eddie. "Too bad really, it seems like we only just started sleuthing. But we'll be back in a few episodes.

"Eddie's right; they'll be one episode of Total Ousted Alphabet every four eliminations. So sit tight and don't go anywhere … if you do then the Goombas will get'cha!" Grinned Sasha.

"So from me, Eddie Lynmoire, goodnight!"

"And from me, Sasha Tasset, goodbye!"

"And see you next time." Both said in usion.

"And cut; that's a wrap." Said a camera man as the audience began to disperse.

"You know." Said Fifi. "It's amazing how a little les than an hour can change your whole view point."

"I think this is the beginning of a new you." Smiled Patch.

"I'll see you guys later." said Carlton as he got out of the chair. "I'm gonna go to bed."

As Carlton headed towards backstage a mouse approached him and squeaked.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh!" Screamed Carlton as he ran away into backstage. As he did the sounds of crashing, bangs and falling equipment sounded all around.

"Poor kid." Said Sasha in sympathy.

"He's a real butt monkey alright." Sighed Eddie.

* * *

I'm satisfied with how this chapter turned out; I think i wrote eddie and sasha pretty well.

It may be obvious but heer are their stereotypes.

Eddie- The Detective

Sasha- The Bubbly Gamer

**Next time- **Screams and whimpers all around; it's time for the contestants to face their worst fears! I bet Carlton is glad he lost right?


	10. Day 5, Part 1, Carlton was lucky to go

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or World Tour. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I don't own the alphabet theme either; that belongs to Frank15. I do however own all twenty six contestant OC's and the two aftermath host OC's. Please do not steal.

**The warning:** This story contains Bullying, bad language, hair related discrimination, a sadistic host and many different fears.

**Pairings: **I won't tell but some were hinted at last chapter. If you didn't spot them they will be hinted at again from time to time in the future.

**Note:** Merry Christmas everyone! May you all have a wonderful time with your family and eat food till you burst … and don't forget the presents or Jesus' birth. But I digress; enjoy this chapter as much as I did writing it. I've also made a new post on my Deviantart profile with some … 'information' … regarding the story, nothing too spoilery but some all the same … but I'm not saying who wins. Nope, no way!

It's party time!

* * *

Chris Maclean was as usual standing on the dock of shame; it was dark out and the snow from earlier had vanished. This seemed odd considering the sun wasn't out to melt it … but Chris doesn't play by the rules does he? Chris waved to the camera and threw his arms up.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz! It was the season to be jolly as we celebrated Christmas in July. Thought the idea was stupid, but I'm Chris Maclean so it doesn't matter." Boasted Chris arrogantly. "And Jimmy still believe in Santa; what a moron huh?"

Chris laughed his signature chuckle before resuming his speech.

"The first part of the challenge was a sleigh race; that was where Wallace struck first. While Kasimar and Barney sword fighted with candy canes, Wallace detonated a bomb on Team Jungle's sleigh. It put them out of the race and secured Victory for Team grenade … but that was only part one. In the second part the three teams split up to look for boxes of decorations to decorate their trees with. Wallace wasted no time in going back to the hole he dug a few days ago. I swear; that kid is a card carrying villain."

Chris chuckled and mumbled something about TV Tropes before he continued his recap.

"Gary and Raven ended up falling down the hole … and it turns out Raven is claustrophobic! What were the chances right? Haha! Kasimar actually found their suffering funny, he's my personal favorite. But anyway; later in the challenge Yessica and Irene also fell down. They would have been left there which would have meant a second loss for Team Jungle but Vinnie arrived on the scene. He realized Wallace was behind everything and was not happy with him being blamed instead of a ginger bad guy. He spun his metal arm like a drill and drove Kasimar and Wallace off. After helping the others out of the pit his name was cleared. Too bad really; he's not really that popular anyway."

Chris grumbled a little. Maybe he didn't like Vinnie too much; but Chris is a bigger dick than anyone else in existence though he refuses to acknowledge this.

"In the end Team Grenade lost because of Carlton being scared by Kasimar and falling into the tree which knocked it over. At the Bonfire Ceremony it came down to Carlton and Wallace. Very fortunately, especially for ratings, Wallace got the final Marshmallow and Carlton walked the dock of shame … though he was happy to go."

Chris sighed and mumbled something that sounded an awful lot like 'useless coward'. He quickly smiled again though.

"It's now day five; who will be the next to lose? Will Wallace's schemes get any eviler? And can I get any more awesome? These questions and more will be answered today; don't go anywhere because it's time for another episode of Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

(**Team Jungle, Guys**)

The three guys were in their beds relaxing; it had been a pretty cold day and it was great to finally get warm again. Rather than reading books or just sleeping they were talking with each other.

"I think Chris is an idiot." Said Gary. "Celebrating Christmas in July? That's stupid!"

"I agree." Nodded Hector. "You shouldn't celebrate a holiday when it's months away. Though I do enjoy Christmas, do you guys?"

"Duh! Who doesn't?" Replied Vinnie with a smile. "It's the best time of year; everyone gets along. Though it's hard to use a knife and fork at the same time with a metal arm … but the pincers cut things just as well as a knife."

"Why did you have pincers and not a hand?" Asked Gary. "It seems a little silly."

"The pincers are actually detachable, I bought the metal hand along as well … I just haven't used it yet." Explained Vinnie.

"Your arm is a Swiss army knife." Mused Hector. "Can it shoot out like a grappling hook?"

"It can't do that; but it's got a really strong grip. One time at school the school bully was picking on me and my friends; I just grabbed his hand with my metal arm … he cried like a baby. Nobodies bullied me or my buds ever since, if anything we're kinda well liked." Recollected Vinnie. "I didn't mean to hurt him though; I'm not like that."

"I think is doesn't matter that you lack an arm. You could potentially be the most useful." Said Gary seriously and nicely. "But while we're on the subject of holidays, besides Christmas my favorite is Easter."

"Yeah; I love the Easter eggs." Said Hector in remembrance. "They're better than the usual nameless brand chocolate."

Vinnie looked uncomfortable for a moment and Hector and Gary noticed this and realized why.

"Oh, sorry, we forgot you … don't like Easter eggs." Said Hector apologetically.

"I take it you're a little scared of them right?" Asked Gary.

"A bit yes." Nodded Vinnie while looking down.

"If I may ask … why are you scared of them?" Asked Gary in puzzlement.

"Well … it's to do with why I have a metal arm; but I'd rather not get into it." Said Vinnie shiftily. "It is pretty stupid being scared of an Easter egg though; I'm not a tough guy but its lame even for me."

"Everyone is scared of something." Said Hector kindly. "Like I've god fridgophobia, the fear of being excessively cold."

"Why weren't you bothered yearlier?" Asked Gary.

"Because I was wrapped up warm and didn't feel the cold." Explained Hector. "If I do feel it I get very uncomfortable and fidgety. What's your fear Gary?"

"Well; it would have to be … the dark." Said Gary awkwardly. "I can generally control it … but, err, could you guys keep a secret?"

"Sure thing buddy." Said Vinnie honestly.

"I kinda… sleep with a night light. I'll conquer it one day … but I just prefer light to dark."

"Are you scared when you close your eyes?" Asked Hector. "I've heard of that before."

"Nope; just when the environment around me is dark. Did you notice I was a little on edge at the last Bonfire Ceremony?" Asked Gary.

"I thought you were just nervous about being voted off." Said Vinnie in recollection.

"No; I was uneasy about the darkness on a god forsaken Island. I saw last season; it's awful at night … sasquatchinaquwa ring a bell?" Said Gary with a hand quotation.

"What varied fears we have." Said Hector. "Easter eggs, cold, and the dark. Interesting."

"I just hope there isn't a phobia challenge this season." Gulped Vinnie.

"I wouldn't think so." Said Gary. "Chris wouldn't want to be called unoriginal."

"He has a lot of faults." Agreed Hector.

"Doesn't everyone?" Asked Vinnie.

"I guess so." Said Hector. "But Chris is a huge narcissist; and he singles me out a bit."

"He'll get his eventually; it's karma, no two ways about it." Said Gary. "What goes around comes around."

* * *

**Confessional- I'm scared of being ignored…**

**Gary: Lot's of people are scared of the dark; if you say you're fearless … you are a big fat liar. Seriously; everyone is scared of something … I just wish I could find out Chris's fear … instant karma.**

* * *

(**Team Grenade**, **girls)**

Tabitha let out an exasperated sigh; Yessica was shivering and shaking at the sight of Uzuri's emo doll. While she had to agree it was kinda creepy … it was just a friggin doll! Pretty lame fear in Tabitha's opinion.

"Are you ok Yessica?" Asked Tabitha with fake concern; in reality she was a little amused.

"Not really; that doll is scaring me." Shivered Yessica. "It's just not normal."

Uzuri looked at Yessica and smiled sweetly.

"Oh don't worry; little Miss Emo isn't going to incinerate you! Ask her yourself!"

Uzuri pulled the string on the doll; everyone waited for the newest emo phrase.

"_Bleeding makes me light as a feather! Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll in its usual high pitched sing song voice.

"Doesn't that make you feel better?" Asked Uzuri kindly.

"Not at all." Mumble Yessica as she edged away from the blond sweet sadist. "I've always thought I wasn't really easy to scare … but that _thing_ has become my worst fear."

"There's no shame in that; I admit the doll is kinda weird." Agreed Irene. "If you're scared of it then it's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm not fearless at all; my worst fear would be seeing a tree burning."

"Any reason why?" Asked Yessica curiously.

"I just don't like nature suffering." Responded Irene.

"Trees burning must be bad." Nodded Uzuri somberly. "The screams and yells of burning hellfire as they are incinerated must be sad."

Irene looked wide eyed and uneasy from what Uzuri had said.

"Could you possibly tone down the sadistic examples a bit?" Asked Irene pleadingly.

"I'll try; but you have some kinda silly fears. Dolls aren't scary and you can just put out a plant with water, right?" Said Uzuri logically as she hugged her doll.

"Well; I guess so." Said Yessica. "But we've all got something we don't like … though considering your personality I think you might be fearless."

Uzuri shook her head and smiled.

"Nope; I assure you I'm not fearless in any way; horror movies and scary things like that don't scare me … but what does scare me is electrocution. One time back home the microwave short circuited and zapped me." Said Uzuri with a shiver.

"Did it hurt?" Asked Tabitha with false concern, she had to make the others think she cared.

"Quite a lot; I've never been the same since according to most people." Shrugged Uzuri. "I was zapped with over nine thousand volts … though with minimal amps so I survived."

"That sounds really painful." Agreed Tabitha. "Maybe that's why you like all these unusual things nowadays."

"Could be." Smiled Uzuri. "So what about you Tabitha, do you have a fear? Or are you as fearless as you are a good leader?"

Tabitha smiled at the compliment; being called a good leader meant Uzuri may join an alliance with her. Tabitha thought she should tell the truth in return, just this once.

"Thanks Uzuri; but like everyone else I have a phobia, if there is somebody who is indeed fearless I'd like to shake their hand. My fear … is mellisophobia. It means I'm scared of bees."

"But honey is delicious, it's nature's candy." Said Irene to get her point across.

"True … but I'm allergic to bee stings." Explained Tabitha calmly and quickly.

"I wonder if little Miss Emo has a fear?" Pondered Uzuri.

"I wouldn't think so." Said Tabitha. "She's just an inanimate doll."

"True … I have an idea!" Giggled Uzuri with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Oh not another creepy and self harming emo phrase!" Begged Yessica.

The pleading came too late for Uzuri pulled the string.

"_A flamethrower can light my fireplace … while my head is in it_!_ Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll once more; Yessica pulled her bed sheets over herself and lay shivering.

"Sorry!" Apologized Uzuri as thunder started outside the cabins.

* * *

**Confessional- Oogly Boogly Boo!**

**Tabitha: Once again that doll is becoming a problem; I'll have to do something about it. No matter what I do I don't think Yessica or Uzuri will last much longer … I guarantee it. **(Smiles evilly).

**Irene: Trees burning is so freaky; I hope I never have to watch that. Still, that doll is kinda creepy … but I'm sure Tabitha can sort the problem without upsetting anyone.**

* * *

(**Team Puzzle Guys**)

The storm had begun and rain fell down from the clouds outside the cabin. Thunder and lightning struck from above though thankfully didn't hit anybody. Inside the boys section of Team Puzzle's cabin the boys were in bed reading. Barney was reading another pirate comic, Jimmy was reading the Disney annual and Spider was absorbed in a puzzle book. The current puzzle was an expert rated spot the difference.

Andy had been reading a space comic (Square Dancer of the Outer Region) but the thunder had made him stop. As the thunder continued he shivered fearfully a little bit.

"Why did it have to be thunder?" Whispered Andy to himself as he shuddered again. This caught the attention of his bunk buddies.

"You ok me heartie?" Asked Barney in concern. "You look as though you've been forced to walk the plank into shark infested water."

"I'm fine guys; I just don't like thunder." Replied Andy. "It makes me uneasy."

"Are you *cough* afraid?" Asked Spider.

"No! I'm not afraid!" Said Andy quickly; he didn't want his friends to think he was a wimp or anything like that.

Spider looked at Andy and smiled.

"There's no shame in *cough* being scared you *sneeze* know." Said Spider kindly and wisely. "The things that scare us are usually very dangerous; nobody is fearless."

Andy looked at Spider in amazement at how well he had ordered his words.

"That's our friendly neighborhood Spider; he's got the right stuff." Grinned Barney.

"Isn't that line from Spiderman?" Asked Jimmy.

"I suppose so; but it's ok if I don't use if commercially. Stealing is not good, even for a pirate. Imagine what would happen if someone stole Freddie Krueger!" Laughed Barney

"What?" Yelped Jimmy in fear. "Freddie's here? Help!"

Jimmy immediately zoomed under his bed and shivered fearfully. Barney mentally slapped himself and looked at Jimmy apologetically.

"Sorry! That fiend isn't here, no need to worry." Said Barney very apologetically. "Curse me peg legged tendency to not think before I speak."

Jimmy crawled out from under the bunk and got back into bed shaking a little.

"Sorry about that guys; Freddie Krueger gives me nightmares, what with his burns and creepiness." Shivered Jimmy.

"I don't *cough* blame you Jimmy." Shuddered Spider with a nod. "I *seriously* don't *cough* like horror *sneeze* movies. But if there *cough* was one thing that *gag* scares me … it's definitely *cough* phobophobia."

"Wow spider; that's deep indeed." Said Barney in wonder. "Very mature I'll say."

"What exactly is phobophobia?" Asked Andy. "Is it the fear of some sort of germ?"

Spider shook his head and coughed. After he stopped he wiped his nose with a tissue and began the explanation.

"Phobophobia is the *cough* fear … of fear itself." Explained Spider with a sick sniffle. "I get really *cough* stressed when I feel any *cough* type of fear; there isn't a particular thing *sneeze* that scares me. I just can't stand the *hard cough* fearful feeling; that is what *cough* scares me."

Andy looked impressed at this revelation; being scared of fear and not just one single scary thing like an injection or skeleton.

"What sets off your fear Spider?" Asked Andy with great interest. "If you fear an emotion you can't really set it of the same way as an emotion doesn't physically exist."

"I have to be *cough* be near sombody who *sneeze* is currently feeling *hard cough* fear. It *sneeze* has to give me quite a sudden *sniffle* surge of it to have effect." Said Spider thoughtfully and quite sickly.

"That's nothing to a shark me hearties." Said Barney. "They cause chaos when they come close to land. Many a pirate and sailor has lost life and limb to those scourges of the sea. And they have the strongest jaws in the world besides that of the hyena."

"Sharks aren't very nice." Agreed Jimmy. "I wonder if Bridgette from last season ever met a shark in the water."

"If she has she has got all my respect." Said Barney.

**Confessional- Shark breath!**

**Spider: I hope there** *cough*** isn't another fear challenge; I ***sneeze*** don't think I'd do to well** *cough*** at it. I really don't know how much ***big sneeze*** longer I'm going to last … but ***cough*** the island air is quite fresh and ***double cough*** I've made a few friends ***cough*** so it's working out so far.**

**Jimmy: I hate Freddie Krueger; he gets into the one place you have no protection … your dreams. One time at my friend Ted's house his older brother put it on; I entered the room when he … murdered someone. I've never spent the night at Ted's house since then.**

(**Team Puzzle, girls**)

* * *

"Wow Eleanor; your ferrets are so *CUTE*." Said Quana in a giggly voice as she stroked dandelion; the pregnant creamy yellow ferret yipped happily.

"Thanks; they're so soft that sometimes they use each other as pillows." Said Eleanor as she stroked Frost. "Usually they aren't too good with strangers but they really like you."

"I wonder why." Pondered Quana as she scratched behind Dandelion ears. "Do you think they like my scent? I wash my hair with strawberry scented shampoo. Perhaps they like that."

"Maybe." Said Eleanor with a shrug. "But they both dislike the taste of strawberries though. I don't think it matters. If they're happy then I'm happy."

"Those ferrets are nice." Said Zita from her bunk. "Have they had their shots for island related diseases?"

Eleanor went wide eyed for a moment before nodding.

"Err … does the word 'shots' bother you?" Asked Zita.

"It's more what it implies; I _really_ don't like injections." Explained Eleanor. "I know they're for the best but they are just plain horrible."

"I agree; they do kinda hurt." Nodded Quana in full agreement. "But they help immunize you against diseases and viruses."

"They still hurt a bit." Shivered Eleanor.

"Loads of things hurt." Said Zita flatly. "We just fear the sharpest of those things for some reason."

"I wonder why?" Asked Quana to herself.

"Because they hurt!" Exclaimed Eleanor. "Everyone has a fear right; mine just happens to be injections."

"That's completely fine; fears are completely natural, I'm not fearless." Said Quana warmly and kindly.

"So what are you scared of Quana?" Asked Zita curiously.

"I happen to be scared of cemeteries or graveyards even." Admitted Quana nervously.

"Why would you be scared of them?" Said Zita in a little confusion. "They're nothing to be scared of … I never go there though, I don't do grave robbing."

"I don't like them … because they remind me of zombies." Shivered Quana. "Monsters that just rise out the ground half decayed and drink your … fluids."

Quana was shaking a little by the end of her explanation. Dandelion seemed to sense this and snuggled against her.

"But zombies aren't real." Said Eleanor.

"And we're nowhere near raccoon city." Added Zita.

"I just feel very uneasy in them." Said Quana with a sigh.

"I hear ya; fire freaks me out." Said Zita. "I don't like getting anywhere near it."

"That's quite a common fear." Said Eleanor kindly. "I have about five friends scared of fire."

"Not as much as me." Said Zita with her head to her hand. "Fire may be so useful for humanity, but it really scares me. I've never been camping because of the camp fires, I kinda missed out on a few experiences because of this fear."

"We understand." Smiled Quana. "Right Eleanor?"

"Of course." Smiled the turtle hatted girl. "All this talk of fears reminds me of last season's phobia challenge."

"Celine Dion music store standees as a fear is pretty stupid." Chuckled Zita to herself.

* * *

**Confessional- Axe murderer.**

**Eleanor: It's great to have such nice bunk mates; Quana's really nice and my ferrets seem to like her; and Zita is quite kind when you get past her whole stealing obsession. I just hope I don't end up regretting mentioning my phobia…**

**Zita: Fire … the bane of my existence, I just don't like it. I prefer an electric heater, the same efficiency and none of the flames. And a torch is better for lighting up the darkness anyway.**

**Quana: I've seen a zombie movie before … I was having a panic attack after just the first ten minutes. I wonder what he guys are afraid if? And what does Nakia fear? Bad hair cuts I bet. Hopefully we will win tomorrow; I don't want to send any of my friends down the dock of shame. And while I'm here; I wonder how Chris is going to get rid of all the snow?**

* * *

(**Team Grenade girls**)

"So what exactly happened earlier?" Asked Lavender. "Wallace trapped you in a hole didn't he … but why?"

Lavender, Xaria and Mable were asking Raven what had happened earlier. Raven was telling them all that had occurred and was a little nervous.

"W-well; he was trying t-to eliminate t-the competition. He ended up getting m-me, Gary, Y-yessica and Irene. All the w-while he was g-going on about how a-a-awesome he is because h-he's e-evil." Explained Raven while she tried not to think of her time in the hole.

"Stupid evil much?" Mused Lavender before turning serious. "I think we should all keep an eye on him from now on. Him and Kasimar; a bad guy and a bully, not a good duo for everyone else."

"I'm starting to wish I voted for Wallace instead of Carlton." Sighed Mable.

"We could have voted Wallace off." Said Lavender. "But Carlton got the most votes … but let's be honest; he wasn't very useful anyway. He was scared of everything."

"So much for our winning streak though." Sighed Mable in defeat. "We could have been unstoppable; but Kasimar scared Carlton which made us end up losing."

"He had so many phobias." Grumbled Xaria as she lay on her bed with her eyes closed. "He was of little use to the team … and besides, he didn't even want to be here. It's kind of like a euthanasia vote, voted off in kindness."

"That's a good way of putting it." Agreed Mable. "And his worst fear was garden gnomes … is that even a real phobia?"

"It's called Gnomophobia." Said Lavender. "Though is ranks pretty high on the list of lamest phobias."

"At least c-c-c-claustrophobia is p-pretty reasonable." Said Raven quietly. "I j-just wondered … what are y-you girls afraid of if I m-may ask."

"Not telling." Said Xaria with her eyes still closed.

"I will." Shrugged Lavender casually. "Nothing scares me more than scorpions; they're unpleasant, dreadful, awful, wicked creatures."

"All true." Agreed Xaria. "But you could just step on them."

"The sting of some of them can kill you in minutes, I wouldn't take the risk of the stinger piercing my shoes … they aren't particularly thick." Explained Lavender. "They just have a look of evil about them; I can't think of an instance where scorpions have been depicted positively."

"Same with snakes." Said Xaria. "Every single animal on this world wants to kill us all."

"My fear is kind of weird." Said Mable nervously.

"We w-won't laugh." Promised Raven.

"Ok; I'm … scared of junk food." Said Mable quickly and full of embarrassment.

"Really?" Asked Lavender. "Why would you be scared of it? Junk food tastes great!"

"I know … but have you seen shows like half tonne hospital? Those poor souls who have gained extreme weight by letting themselves go and losing control just once. I don't want to end up like that."

"So you don't even like chocolate?" Asked Xaria curiously.

"Yep; I eat only healthy foods … it may get boring after a while but it pays off, I'm in great shape after all." Smiled Mable.

"I h-haven't heard of a f-food related fear before." Said Raven in interest.

"Well it does exist." Reassured Mable. "What about you Xaria? Care to tell us your fear?"

"Nope." Said Xaria still with her eyes closed.

"We've all said ours though." Said Lavender.

"You chose to say yours and I'm choosing not to say mine." Replied Xaria.

"Does it bother you?" Asked Mable. "The best way to stop something from bothering you is generally to talk about it."

"You wouldn't even know what it is even if I told you." Said Xaria flatly.

"Gee; and I thought you were cool." Said Lavender as she began to use reverse psychology. "And why tell us anyway; we probably wouldn't be interested anyway. Yep; you're kinda … what's the word or two … shut away."

Xaria opened her eyes and looked at the others.

"Well; if you MUST know you privacy invaders, I'm scared of mind flayers."

There was a confused silence among the other three.

"What's a mind flayer?" Asked Mable.

"Is it a type of squid?" Asked Raven in equal puzzlement.

"In a way." Shrugged Xaria mildly.

"Ok; I know I've heard that name before somewhere." Said Lavender as she searched her memory deeply to find the knowledge she was looking for. "Hmmm … HMMMMMMMMM … Got it! Isn't that a type of dungeons and dragons monster?"

"… Yes." Grumbled Xaria. "It's the worst creature of them all. How would you like it if you were woken in the middle of the night to your sister right in your face with a mind flayer mask on?"

There was a short stunned silence.

"Oh gosh … your s-sister doesn't sound v-very nice."

"Tell me about it." Sighed Xaria as she closed her eyes again.

* * *

**Confessional- In the middle of the night.**

**Xaria: Me and my sister don't get along very well; yep, she's … not nice … at all.**

**Lavender: What kind of a sister would do that? I've seen mind flayers in art before … they're quite frightening. Though not as frightening as a scorpion.**

**Raven: I hope t-there isn't another phobia challenge this y-y-year; I know I wouldn't be able t-to do it. Gary was very s-supportive when we were t-t-t-trapped; I wonder if his a-alliance will get us to the end?**

* * *

(**Team Grenade Guys**)

"It has been a great day for evil today my right hand man." Said Wallace while writing in a notebook.

"How exactly?" Asked Kasimar gruffly. "We lost and you nearly got the boot."

"That's not important; we trapped four people in one trap and got away with our misdeeds. And we've gotten rid of some dead weight so we have a better chance of winning next time." Explained Wallace with a wave of his hand as he went back to writing.

"It's a shame Carlton got voted off." Said Oscar.

"Why; he was a spastic wuss." Grinned Kasimar nastily

"True … but he was a damn sight saner than you two. I'm the only guy on the team with any sanity left."

"Sanity is for the good guys." Said Wallace dismissively.

"What are you writing anyway, he asked not expecting a sane response." Said Oscar snarkerly.

"Why; my evil schemes of course! Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace in his signature manical laugh.

"Dare I ask what they are?" Said Oscar with a sigh.

"Oh you know; just setting the white house on fire, throwing a shoe at the English queen and smothering Finland in napalm." Said Wallace casually.

"You're a nut job." Said Oscar. "But after four days of knowing you I've come to expect it."

"You think that stuff is bad; try bombing a church or letting an orphanage ablaze!" Laughed Kasimar with a gleam in his mean eyes. "Yahahahaha!"

"That … is kind of disturbing." Said Oscar as he seemed rather creeped out. "You guys are crazy! About as bad as heights."

"…You're scared of heights?" Asked Kasimar mockingly before laughing. "What a wimp! You call yourself strong; what a cheap lauzy faggot! Yahahaha!"

"You're point coward?" Asked Oscar.

"I'm no coward you wretch!" Growled Kasimar.

"Oh really? You seem to pick your fights with someone who can't fight back; I'm always ready for one if you're brave enough. I'm braver than you by admitting my fear."

"I'm fearless." Smirked Kasimar as he crossed his arms.

"Oh don't be big headed my lackey." Said Wallace. "It makes you more human having a fear. Every great villain has some human in them; like Voldemort was scared of death."

"So what are you scared of?" Grunted Kasimar. "The cross?"

"Don't be ridiculous; nothing like that." Said Wallace with a laugh. "I'm scared of helping an old lady across the street. It's so … good and pure. Not how I roll."

"I should have expected that." Said Oscar with a sigh. "What about you Kasimar? Do you have a fear, because I seriously doubt you are fearless."

"Well I am; unlike Courtney I really am." Said Kasimar smugly.

"I doubt it." Said Oscar calmly.

"Oh really? This coming from somebody who's scared of heights. O boo hoo, I'm a wittle retarded baby, boooo hoooo! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar sadistically.

Oscar calmly stood up and towered over Kasimar and looked very hardly down on him.

"Those who ridicule others for there fears are usually insecure with their own. You're not a nice guy at all."

"I'm not nice; I'm the strongest person here! I could snap you're spine and break off every one of those little things attached to it."

"Watch what you say; I could easily send you to the dentist." Growled Oscar.

For a very brief moment a look of pure panic passed through Kasimar's face; Oscar noticed this and repeated his sentence in his head and realization hit him.

"So you're scared of the dentist eh?" Said Oscar.

"Shut up!" Snarled Kasimar.

"Hey; its fine, even so called 'fearless people' are afraid of something." Said Oscar while making hand quotations.

"Dentists are the doctors of evil! Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly as usual.

"I hope I can get some sleep tonight." Grumbled Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional- The magic eight balls says 'don't count on it'.**

**Wallace: I have a feeling tomorrow will be a great day for evil! So much to do, so much to **_**destroy**_**. Mwahahahaha! I can only hope that my hole will continue to gather victims as the contest goes by.**

**Oscar: I knew Kasimar wasn't fearless; he talks really big and he is strong, I'll give him that, but he's without a doubt chaotic evil. I have a feeling that someday in this competition some bad stuff is going to go down and it will be to do with Kasimar.**

**Kasimar: Oscar is no match for me; he may be the most big and strong out of all of us … but there's one thing he doesn't know. I fight **_**dirty**_**. But I'll put that on the back burner for now; I've got to bully the weaker kids and fill my self imposed Quota.** (Kasimar crossed his legs and chuckles darkly). **The million dollars are going to be mine and I'll break anyone who gets in my way. And … what I'd like in this competition is someone who dares to stand up to me. It would be fun to crush them. Oscar doesn't count; he's not weak. I'll wish for now; maybe I can have some fun with the result later. Yahahaha!**

* * *

The next day the campers were eating in the mess hall; thanks to Gary tutoring chef is was marginally, _very_ marginally, better, though it was still pretty bad. Also as usual Team Jungle was enjoying good food because of Gary's cooking skills.

"Chef is quite a difficult student to teach." Said Gary after swallowing some poached egg and fries. "But if he's improving then I know my skills aren't being wasted."

"Why bother teaching him?" Asked Irene blankly. "Though I've barely tasted his cooking; it looks like it came from the garbage dump."

"Metaphorically or literally?" Asked Vinnie as he drank some juice.

"A bit of both." Responded Irene. "I'm wondering where he learnt to cook."

"An asylum perhaps?" Joked Hector from his seat next to Gary. The others laughed at this funny pun.

"Good one Hector." Smiled Tabitha falsely. "But jokes aside we'll need to be prepared for today's challenge. All teams have seven people so if we win today we can build up a lead."

"And come in first place for the very first time." Added Yessica.

"That's an added bonus." Agreed Tabitha.

"Speaking of bonus; have you ever noticed the bonus's you get with knife kills in some violent games?" Asked Uzuri from next to Tabitha.

"I don't really play violent video games; I much prefer The Sims." Replied Tabitha. "It's probably because using a knife against a monster is practically suicidal."

* * *

**Confessional- BANG! SLASH!**

**Tabitha: Uzuri is a crazy and repulsively disgusting creature. I'd vote her off … but she thinks of me as her best friend so I'll keep her as an ally. When she runs out of usefulness I'll drop her like a bomb. Seeing her horrified face … will be quite satisfying, another manipulation well done.**

**Gary: I wonder how Tabitha manages Uzuri; she's pretty nice but some of the things she says are kind of … disturbing. She must have loads of patience and as a Chef that is something I can respect. As for progress on tutoring Chef? He at least doesn't add salt to cake anymore. I'm thinking of moving him from cereal and toast up to pastries. I'm not even thinking about moving onto meat until he stops setting the oven to full blast by force of habit.**

* * *

The mess hall was mostly silent but it wasn't for long. All of a sudden the doors burst open and there stood a zombie.

"Aaargh! A zombie!" Screamed Quana in fear as she jolted under the table.

"Haha! What a coward." Laugh the 'zombie' sadistically.

"I know that voice." Grumbled Xaria in disdain.

The 'zombie' removed the mask and there stood Chris MacLean; he looked very pleased with himself and grinned sadistically.

"That's an excellent start to the day!" Smiled Chris like a sadist. "And it's going to get even better."

"What do you mean?" Asked Quana as she crawled out from under the table.

"It's today's challenge!" Smiled Chris horribly. "It's one I'm disappointed Carlton isn't here for."

"Oh no; he can't mean." Gulped Andy as he trailed off.

"Today's challenge is Phobia Factor, The Second Fright!" Announced Chris very happily. "We were originally going to fire you out of cannons onto targets but funnily enough … each and every one of you told the camera's your fears last night. So we scrapped the old idea and bought back an old challenge to really make you suffer."

"This can't end well." Groaned Zita.

"Indeed it won't; because later on you'll be facing some fire." Laughed Chris. "And Jimmy will be introducing himself to Freddie Krueger."

"What?" Yelped Jimmy as he pulled his hat over his head and shook like a leaf.

"And if we're lucky someone might have a heart attack; that will really boost ratings." Grinned Chris with another sadistic chuckle. "And thus my paycheck will skyrocket."

"Money is the root of all evil." Mumbled Mable with a sigh.

"But before we go to those fears … we are going to start off with two team Jungle guys." Said Chris as he rubbed his hands in excitement. "Hector, time to get chilly, and Gary, it's time for lights out!"

Hector and Gary gulped as they knew what they would have to do and it wouldn't be anything good.

"Everyone follow me; I'll take you to your challenges one by one. At the end of the day the team with the most points will win immunity. The team with the least points is sending someone home. In the case of a tie a random person from each team involved in the tie will face their fear again."

"That doesn't seem very fair." Said Lavender with a scowl at the nasty host.

"Thanks; I try." Laughed Chris. "Now get moving everyone; I want to hear screams within the hour.

* * *

**Confessional- Horrors of hellfire.**

**Lavender: Oh boy; this is not going to be a great day … and the forecast says that it is gonna get a million and six times worse. **(She smiles a little before shivering in fright). **It won't be too long before I'm called up … I can't even think of a cheer to psyche myself up.**

**Spider: This will be truly ***cough* **terrible. But who will I be ***sneeze* **be paired up with? I hope **cough* **they don't get too scared** **…** *cough* **… if they do then it ***gag* **will set my phobia off. ***sniffle*

* * *

The contestants and Chris were standing outside of a small building. It felt cold from within and had absolutely no windows or any way of light getting in.

"Ok you two; all you have to do is spend five hours in there." Explained Chris to Gary and Hector. "The door is unlocked but if you exit at any time you automatically lose. Gary; you will get a warm coat to protect you from the cold. And Hector; you get some night vision goggles so you can see your surroundings ...and no trading luxury items."

Interns handed the two guys their supplies and opened the door to the cold, dark shack.

"We'll check up on you two saps later." Laughed Chris as the door was shut and he turned to the others.

"I think the next person to face their fear will be … Eleanor."

Eleanor gulped as all eyes were on her.

"Ok Eleanor; your challenge is easy; all you have to do is get an injection of water from Chef Hatchet. But you're just a little girl; I'll understand if you 'ferret out', haha!"

"That didn't make any sense." Said Eleanor while feeling angry that Chris didn't think she could do it.

"What's it going to be chicken?" Smirked Chris. "Face your fear or be a coward; everyone knows little kids never last in the big scary world outside their bedroom."

"Leave her alone you bully!" Said Jimmy with a face he hoped looked intimidating; he didn't like it when people were mean to his friends.

"Don't worry Jimmy … I can do this." Said Eleanor as an intern led her off to the medical tent to complete her challenge.

"While Eleanor is doing that I think our next victim can be Uzuri. All you have to do is get electrocuted at a couple … hundred volts."

"What willbe used to zap me?" Asked Uzuri nervously.

"An electric eel." Said Chris sadistically.

"That's fine; eels are cute. Bring it on!" Smiled Uzuri.

Chris signaled a nearby intern who bought over an extremely angry and irritated electric eel; though thankfully for the intern he was wearing gloves.

"Ready for some pain Uzuri?" Asked Chris eagerly.

"Danger's my middle name … well actually it's Taiver but who cares? Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as the intern passed her the eel.

BUZZ!

Electricity surged throughout Uzuri which made her blond hair stand on end and made her facial muscles twitch which led to some funny faces.

"This … feels … exciting." Giggled Uzuri. "I … feel … lightheaded!"

At that moment Uzuri fell over on the ground and lay still, though still breathing.

"Is she ok?" Asked Vinnie with great concern.

"She's fine." Shrugged Chris.

"But she could be hurt." Persisted Vinnie.

"Regardless she's fiiiiiiiine! Hahaha!" Laughed Chris though he stopped when he saw everyone glaring at him hatefully. "Bad joke I know; she's ugly really … ok, I'll send her to the infirmary."

Chris signaled a pair of nameless interns quickly who ran up, put Uzuri on a stretcher, and ran off to the medical tent.

"At least we get a point right." Said Tabitha. "Though I hope Uzuri is ok."

"Actually you don't." Grinned Chris.

"Excuse me?" Said Tabitha in shock.

"Yep; you need to remain conscious until I say you've got the point for it to count." Smiled Chris sadistically. "But if she's alive I could give you a lollypop as a consolation prize."

The members of Team Jungle didn't look happy … which is an understatement.

"You horrid man." Said Yessica angrily. "Uzuri could be hurt and you just wave it off? Why?"

"Because I'm Chris MacLean." Laughed Chris. "And you're just a minor contestant."

"We'll see whose minor Chris." Frowned Yessica.

"Yeah, right." Sneered Chris before turning to the camera. "The challenges have begun and so far no team has the advantage. Who will win the first place prize and who is going buh bye? Find out when we return on Total Drama letterz!"

"The show of evil! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace while throwing his arms up.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris pathetically. "Only I get to do the outro to the commercials!"

* * *

That's part one of day five; I had a good time giving each character a fear. It gives them more depth don't you think?

**Next time: **The campers face their fears, well, some do … and Wallace cheats some more. A sixth person walks the dock of shame as well.

Here are the camper's fears if you've already forgotten:-

**Andy- Thunder**

**Barney- Sharks**

**Eleanor- Injections**

**Gary- The Dark**

**Hector- Cold**

**Irene- Trees burning**

**Jimmy- Freddie Krueger **

**Kasimar- The dentist**

**Lavender- Scorpions**

**Mable- Junk Food**

**Oscar- Heights**

**Quana- Cemeteries**

**Raven- Enclosed spaces**

**Spider- Fear itself**

**Tabitha- Bees**

**Uzuri- Electrocution**

**Vinnie- Easter eggs**

**Wallace- Helping an old lady cross the street**

**Xaria- Mind Flayer's**

**Yessica- Uzuri's Emo doll**

**Zita- Fire**


	11. Day 5, Part 2, The scream

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or World Tour. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I do not own the alphabet theme either; that was first put into use by Frank15. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please … DON'T STERAL THEM!

**The warning: **This chapter of the story features an over usage of the word 'dick', cheating, bullying, a sadistic host who is starting to get worse and other stuff. As usual nothing M rated though.

**Pairings: **they might be getting obvious now so I'll put some of them up next chapter. Two new ones are hinted at this time.

**Note: **This is the longest chapter yet; thirty eight pages on word. Enjoy it everyone. Also … Happy New Year!

* * *

"And welcome back everyone." Said Chris with his signature smile. "If you've just joined us then let me tell you … this is the scariest episode of all. The campers are going to face their greatest fears. So far nobody has a lead."

"We would if you'd not make up unfair rules!" Snapped Tabitha.

"I'm Chris MacLean; I can do what I want." Smirked Chris smugly. "And you are just the contestants; you could go at any moment. I'm the only person who will be here every episode of every season."

"…You're a dick." Said Barney with his arms folded.

"Oh shut up you pirate wannabe." Snapped Chris. "I don't have time to listen to your whining. Now everyone; we have a challenge to continue. Uzuri has already half completed her challenge and lost consciousness so we're going to move on … and the next person will be … Barney, as he just insulted me."

"What do I have to do yo ho?" Asked Barney.

"You have to stay in a cage in the water for two hours with sharks swimming around." Smiled Chris sadistically.

"That doesn't sound so hard yaaar." Shrugged Barney. "I'll do it!"

"Ok; but don't say I didn't warn you." Grinned Chris.

"You didn't warn him." Said Lavender.

"Didn't I? Ah well; who cares?" Shrugged Chris as he led Barney and the others to the beach.

* * *

**Confessional- Shark teeth.**

**Barney: Chris is no fun at all yaaar. He's a complete miser for fun. Yo ho. What a sadistic prick. But I can do this! Sharks won't get me voted off yaaar!**

**Lavender: I don't get Chris; he's a narcissist and cares only for himself. Poor Barney; sharks are pretty nasty creatures. I wonder if this nastiness is only mild for Chris; he never seemed particularly nice last season. I bet he wasn't hugged much as a child.**

**Chris: That cheerleader may be a stupid ginger but yes; I didn't get hugged much. But who cares? Love and care is for wimps and bland people … just like everyone here.**

* * *

The campers stood with their teams next to the beach. A cage floated out in the water and Barney was inside it looking completely without a sign of fear.

"Ok Barney; you're task is easy. As I said before, just stay in there for two hours without getting eaten. If you do die you won't have died in vain, your team would get the point anyway."

"…You're a dick." Said Barney flatly as he relaxed in the cage.

"You're a dick." Growled Chris.

"You're a dick."

"You're a dick

"You're a dick."

"You're a dick!"

"You're a dick!"

"You're a dick and I hate you so nyeh!" Whined Chris.

"Fair enough cabin boy." Shrugged Barney as he lay down in the cage, put his arms behind his head and began to doze.

"With that being said we can move on to the next person." Said Chris as he grinned sadistically. "I think that seeing how upset she was last episode, we can get some ratings from Raven."

Raven 'eeped' and gulped.

"Ok everyone; you can just mill around camp until I come to get you, your friends can support you in your challenges. I'll see you later.

Chris led Raven away while the others looked amongst each other.

"I think I'll go with Raven." Said Mable. "She looked kinda scared and I don't want her to have a break down. I'll see you guys later."

Mable turned and ran after Chris and Raven while the others went their separate ways around camp.

Lavender saw Wallace and Kasimar leaving by themselves; they were no doubt up to no good. She sighed and sat down on the beach.

"Typical; every camper admits their fears on the same night and Chris is taking full advantage of it. I hope the scorpions won't be to big."

Lavender shuddered and looked out at Barney in the water with a few shark fins swimming around him.

"He's a braver person than me." Said Lavender to herself as she lay back to sun bathe.

* * *

**Confessional**

**Lavender: How could Barney not be afraid out there with those sharks all around and hardly any protection? I don't know him very well but from what I know … he's highly eccentric and quite smart though he talks like a pirate a bit too much. He could be quite a threat in the future.**

* * *

Eleanor was sitting very nervously on a seat in the medical tent; she was about to be injected. It was only water she kept telling herself, but the feeling of fright surged through her body.

"Keep calm Eleanor." Whispered Eleanor to herself. "It's just a pointy needle, it won't kill you … but it'll hurt."

Eleanor looked towards Chef Hatchet; he was preparing a needle and currently cleaning it, possibly to stop any infection.

"You'll be gentle with the injection right Chef?" Asked Eleanor shakily.

"I'll try." Shrugged Chef gruffly.

"Why do you and Chris enjoy torturing us so much?" Asked Eleanor sadly.

"I just do what I'm told; Chris is kinda my boss … though the producer is ahead of him by a county mile."

"It may be your job but this challenge is crazy." Said Eleanor bravely. "You're making us go through things that could traumatize us! And Jimmy is only ten, and he has to face Freddy Krueger, you're both terrible people."

"It's not like I enjoy making you suffer." Said Chef as he picked up the needle and turned to Eleanor. "I'm just following Chris's lead. To be honest … every now and then I feel a little guilty for what I put the contestants through. Hold out your arm."

Eleanor shivered in fear but pulled up her sleeve and held out her right arm.

"Ok; this won't hurt too much, and it's only water so unless you're H20 intolerant you won't get sick."

Chef was about to inject Eleanor when two interns entered the tent with Uzuri on a stretcher. She was out cold but was oddly giggling to herself. They laid her down on a operating bed and turned to Chef Hatchet.

"Mr. Chef; Uzuri Xisonu has had a bit of an accident." Said the first intern.

"What happened to her?" Asked Chef as he turned away from Eleanor much to the turtle hatted girl's relief.

"She got electrocuted by an electric eel for her challenge but was shocked too hard and is now unconscious." Explained the second intern.

"Well leave her there and I'll see if I can get her to come around; you may leave as I need to do Eleanor's challenge." Said Chef as he glanced over at Uzuri.

The two interns nodded and left the tent. Chef turned back to Eleanor and raised the needle.

"Ok; I'll do it quick as I need to see what's wrong with creepy kid." Said Chef as he steadied the needle and jabbed Eleanor.

"EEEEP!" Yelped Eleanor in pain and shock.

Chef removed the needle and tossed it into a disinfectant sink.

"Ok animal girl; you pass and your team gets a point." Said Chef dismissively. "You may leave and go play or support your team mates or whatever."

Eleanor nodded and got of the chair and after looking at Uzuri in concern she left the tent; before she left for camp she turned back to Chef.

"Thanks for not making fun of my fear Chef." Said Eleanor politely.

"I don't blame you." Said Chef Hatchet honestly and seriously. "Needles are terrible."

Eleanor nodded and left back to camp feeling very fulfilled that she had conquered her phobia. But would the rest of her team be able to do it?"

* * *

**Confessional- The author's worst fear injections be.**

**Eleanor: I felt terrified and the injection hurt, I won't deny it. But I feel like I've accomplished something. If I can defeat my phobia who knows what I can do? I have a good feeling about this contest.**

**Uzuri: When I woke up … my head felt all light and tingly; as if I'd leaked blood. Weird right? I no longer fear electricity … but I don't like eels as much now.**

* * *

Gary and Hector were sitting in cold darkness and felt on edge. Hector feared the cold while Gary feared the dark. It wasn't much fun at all, and they would be here for hours.

"I don't like this at all Hector." Shuddered Gary. "How much longer do we have to be here?"

"About three hours and thirty minutes." Said Hector. "We've still got quite a while to go."

"It seems the minutes are going to be snailing by." Sighed Gary. "The dark is so unnerving and full of terrible creatures."

"True; but you can't see the beauty of the stars in the daylight." Said Hector as he shivered in coldness.

"Likewise you can't have snowmen in the summer." Said Gary with a smile.

"I never really liked the winter season … but some of the snowmen I've seen on the internet are quite impressive."

Both guys were silent for a few minutes; Gary didn't feel too cold because of the coat though the darkness was freaking him out. Hector was pretty cold though he could see in the darkness thanks to the goggles. He could see Gary looked uncomfortable and had an idea on how to get his mind off it.

"So Gary; we've got our alliance right?" Said Hector.

"Yes we do." Nodded Gary while wondering what Hector was getting at.

"Well; in the case that we lose … who do we vote for?"

Gary thought for a moment; that was a hard one.

"Well we would have to think who we could easily get along without. I don't think we should vote off Vinnie or Tabitha; Tabitha is team leader and pretty much the strongest player on the team. And Vinnie … he's our friend."

"Friendship is pretty important." Agreed Hector as he shivered. "So out of Uzuri, Irene and Yessica … who would you vote off?"

"I don't really know. They all have their own strengths. Yessica is a great swimmer, Irene is kind and would be an asset in an outdoor survival challenge … and Uzuri, well, behind the creepiness she seems kind hearted and a good friend, someone to talk to and keep up team morale."

"I guess we can pick from one of those three." Nodded Hector. "If we lost then we'd have to think how well they performed in the challenge, or indeed if Vinnie and Tabitha did awful as well."

"By the way; I got Raven in our alliance yesterday."

"Good job Gary." Congratulated Hector. "How did you manage to do it?"

"We got trapped in a pit trap and I basically comforted her on her fear. After we escaped I asked her and she agreed. Too bad Carlton went and not Wallace."

"What do you think of Raven?" Asked Hector.

"Well; she's shy but she's kind and a good listener … and her stuttering is kinda cute … hey! Are you implying I like Raven? I've known her for less than a week."

"Love can work fast." Chucked Hector. "I'm not implying anything between you though."

"Thanks I guess." Said Gary with an eye roll.

* * *

**Confessional- Ice cold darkness.**

**Hector: That … was the coldest place I've ever been. At least it didn't last much longer.**

**Gary: **(He appears to be deep in thought). … … … **Well; she is kinda cute but it means nothing; I came her to showcase my culinary skills and win, not to be struck by cupid's sharp arrow. And besides, different teams!**

* * *

Wallace and Kasimar were standing outside the cabin that was containing Gary and Hector. The wannabe villain was rubbing his hands together maliciously and chuckled evilly.

"Time for some cheating my lackey." Grinned Wallace. "This will be so evil and mean!"

"Ok; what are we going to do?" Asked Kasimar with a sadistic and cruel grin. "Are we going to pump cyanide into the house so their lungs get fried?"

"A very good idea; but no." Said Wallace with a shake of his head. "We are going to sabotage Team Jungle. I've looked at both them and Team Puzzle and they seem to have the stronger team overall, I mean, have you seen Tabitha? Evil if I ever saw it. And I can respect that."

"So what's the plan?" Asked Kasimar impatiently. "I'm bored and when I get bored I like to hurt stuff."

"Patience young Pasiwaden." Smiled Wallace. "We are going to fill our cheating quota by making the cabin turn icy cold so the fat smart guy will quit. That way Team Jungle will surely fail."

"That's it?" Asked Kasimar with a stony expression.

"Well we certainly can't make the cabin darker if it's already pitch black right?" Said Wallace. "Now take a look over there."

Wallace pointed to some controls attached to the cabin. They approached them and Wallace gestured to them.

"Now what do you think I'm going to do with these?" Asked Wallace.

"I don't care as long as someone gets hurt." Snapped Kasimar. "I'd like to get them both but I suppose I can get the chef later."

"Fair enough; I'm going to set the heat to sub zero and lower. With that cold atmosphere Hector will surely run out in fear. I'm so awesome aren't I? Mwuhahahahahaha!"

"Do you have to laugh so much?" Asked Kasimar dryly. "Laughter reminds me of children, the people I like to hurt."

"It's not the same if it's evil laughter; now let's get this evil pan in the air!" Said Wallace as he began fiddling about with the controls and buttons.

"Do you even know what you are doing?" Asked Kasimar with a raised eyebrow.

"Of course; anyone with an IQ of over one hundred and fifty could work out this contraption. Just press the green, yellow, red and teal buttons in that order and then press THIS button and bingo! Mwuhahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional- Ice cubes are cold! **

**Wallace: It was simple really; I may be evil but I'm the smart type of evil. I know things and all the tricks of the trade of evil! And the best part was that my plan worked; if only Dick Dastardly was as successful.**

**Kasimar: I have to admit; hearing the screams from the fat guy was music to my ears. Maybe next time we can make a girl cry. I think it was a good move joining Wallace … though I'm going to beat him in the final two of course. I NEVER lose.**

* * *

Inside the cabin the temperature was dropping rapidly. Hector was feeling the cold and shivering in both cold and fear. Gary didn't feel as bad due to the coat he had on but even he felt the cold.

"Is it just me or did it just get much colder in here?" Asked Gary. "It feels like the middle of January in Alaska."

"It's not just you; I feel it as well." Shivered Hector.

"Why has it got so cold all of a sudden?" Pondered Gary. "Do you think it's because of Chris?"

"Curse that sadistic narcissist." Said Hector in an increasingly unnerved voice.

"I know what you're thinking Hector; don't run out or give up. You can do it!" Said gary encouragingly.

"I … can't!" Whimpered Hector in fear of the frost. "It's too cold! And I can … see … icicles starting to form on the ceiling."

"Be brave!" Said Gary strongly.

"I'm sorry Gary; you'll have to go on without me, good luck for your part of the challenge." Said Hector with a short scream.

Hector quickly arose and ran out of the cabin and into the warm daylight. Gary sighed and huddled up; he was now alone in the dark.

Outside the cabin Hector kneeled on the grass in a sunny spot and let the warmth run through him like the sensation of entering a hot bath.

"Safe at last." Sighed Hector in relief.

An intern ran up and got Hector's attention.

"Hector; you've failed your challenge and you don't get the point." Explained the intern. "Any particular reason you left?"

"The temperature went below freezing and as I had no coat I felt like my blood had turned to liquid nitrogen." Explained Hector. "The temperature just dropped rapidly all of a sudden."

"That's odd; it was supposed to remain the same throughout the challenge." Said the intern in confusion as he quickly approached the controls and observed them. He blinked and immediately understood.

"It looks like someone has messed with the heat controls and set them for minimum. I'll let Chris know … though he probably won't give you the point." Said the intern apologetically.

"That's fine; at least I'm not in the cold anymore." Smiled Hector to himself.

A short distance away behind some trees Wallace laughed triumphantly.

"Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace at the evil success of his evil scheme. "He never saw it coming; now his team is one point down! Mwahahahaha!"

Kasimar rolled his eyes and grunted.

"We didn't hurt anyone though." He grumbled.

"Sometimes it's not about causing pain but to secure a harmless evil victory." Explained Wallace as he left back to camp.

Kasimar was silent for a moment before walking after Wallace.

"That didn't make any sense!" He bellowed.

* * *

**Confessional- Sex is not the answer, it's the question. Yes is the answer!**

**Wallace: The great Wallace has done it again! Another victim to my dastardly plot; I hope Ripto enjoyed that, because let's face it; he's the best video game villain of all! Short, angry and hates dragons, EVIL! Mwahahahaha!**

**Hector: I have a good suspicion who cheated; he's ginger, wears a leather coat, has shades and a blue arrow died in his hair. It was Wallace. If he dug that hole then he probably lowered the temperature as well. If I do nothing he might do it again … but if I do something he'll feel satisfied.**

* * *

Chris, Raven and Mable stood around the hole Wallace had dug a few days ago; the very same hole Raven had fallen in. Chris smiled in sadistic pleasure at the look of fear on Raven's face and chuckled.

"So Raven; you're claustrophobic. I thought about burying you alive … but that's already been done."

"So has this whole challenge." Said Mable instantly.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "Anyway; I thought it would bring more tears and ratings if you went back in this hole for two hours. You can chicken out if you want … but that would cost your team the point and that would lead to you walking down the dock of shame."

Raven looked down the hole and shuddered in fear at the tight space down at the bottom.

"Stay or leave; the choice is yours." Smirked Chris. "I bet you'll leave though."

Mable pushed Chris away and looked Raven in the eyes.

"You can do this Raven; Chris is just being a dick." Said Mable nicely. "You've just got to be brave and show Chris you CAN do this."

Raven nodded and looked down again. She looked at Mabel, Chris, the hole again and back to Chris. She gulped and sighed, she couldn't do this.

"Chris, I." Began Raven before slipping on a patch of mud and falling down the hole and landing with a bam.

"Well; looks like Raven has decided to do the challenge after all." Smiled Chris.

"I was going to say I c-c-couldn't do it." Raven called up to Chris. "But I slipped and f-fell in!"

"Well it looks like you'll have to stay in; as there is no way to get you out." Taunted Chris meanly.

"Except a ladder!" Snapped Mable.

"But that's back at camp and I feel lazy." Yawned Chris. "But now it's time for your fear so let's go … see ya Raven; oh and Mable, if you come near this pit Raven loses the point.. Haha."

Mable snarled at Chris as he walked away and looked down at Raven.

"You can do it Raven; just be brave and face your fear." Said Mable encouragingly.

"I'll t-try." Called up Raven.

Mable smiled and ran after Chris; she had to secure a point for her team after all.

* * *

**Confessional- Raven in the hole.**

**Mable: Chris seems even nastier this season; it's as if he wants us to die! I know we're supposed to suffer a little … but this is becoming ridiculous. What has made him so nasty? And how can he get away with it?**

**Chris: I'm nasty because it's funny to see people suffer as a result of it … and I get away with it because I'm better than anyone else. Haha!**

* * *

A short while later in the mess hall Mable was seated on a chair and looked in horror at what was on the plate in front of her. It was a sticky, sugary and toffee iced doughnut dipped in treacle. It was probably the most unhealthy thing that anyone had ever seen.

"Ok Mable; just eat the doughnut and you pass." Said Chris. "And it does look pretty tasty indeed."

Mable gulped and looked at the donut; it was as if it was taunting her with its stickiness.

"It looks like it's full of calories." Whimpered Mable.

"Completely full of them." Nodded Chris with a laugh.

"And how much sugar is in it?"

Chris sighed and looked down at Mable.

"Ok fancy hair; just eat it! It's a _doughnut_; this challenge isn't even hard! You're even more of a wimp than Carlton." Laughed Chris horridly.

Mable looked at the donut and trembled in fear.

Andy was also in the mess hall reading one of his comics and saw the look of terror on Mable's face. He decided that though she was an opposing team she still could do with some encouraging words.

"You can do it Mable." Said Andy. "And besides; just eat a load on healthy food afterwards and work out a bit and it won't give you any weight."

Mable looked at Andy and then the doughnut and a look of confidence appeared on her face. Mable picked up the doughnut and quickly ate it. A second after she swallowed the last piece she burped.

"Not bad; quite tasty despite how unhealthy it was." Smiled Mable.

"And you get a point for Team Grenade." Said Chris. "Though it's nothing to be proud of … it was just a doughnut."

Chris left the mess hall while Mable approached Andy.

"Why did you help me?" Asked Mable as she sat down. "I'm not on your team."

"That's no reason why I can't be nice." Smiled Andy. "And I don't like seeing people scared. I think this whole challenge is a bit unethical."

"I concur." Nodded Mable. "Thank you Andy; that was really nice of you."

"I like to think of myself as a nice guy." replied Andy. "See a need fill a need right?"

"I agree; that's a really nice saying." Smiled Mable. "I'd better go and see how my team mates are doing … but thanks for helping me."

"Anytime." Said Andy as Mable got up and left.

* * *

**Confessional- Space vegetables?**

**Andy: I don't usually admit secrets … but I guess you could see it back there. I've kind of developed a little bit of a crush on Mable. Like me she eats healthily and her hair is awesome! She's really nice as well; I bet she could put that bully Kasimar in his place. **

**Mable: Looking back on it … that wasn't so bad; maybe Andy is right, if I exercise and eat healthy after some junk food I won't gain any weight. It was so nice of him to help me despite being my opponent, what a good Samaritan huh?**

* * *

It was time for Quana to face her fear; a makeshift cemetery that looked really realistic. Sound effects such as zombie groaning and leaves rustling were hearable all around. Chris stood at the edge of the cemetery with Quana and also Spider.

"Ok Quana; you're fear is cemeteries. You've just got to stay in this cemetery until I come back for you in a few hours. I've added real tomb stones and some sound effects to make the atmosphere more frightening. In you go!"

Chris shoved Quana into the cemetery and she shivered fearfully as she sat down on a tomb stone.

"Why am I *cough* here Chris?" Asked Spider. "I'm not scared *cough* of cemeteries."

"True; but Quana is going to be oozing fear and since you are afraid of fear itself I think this will be a good match. In you go!"

Chris shoved Spider in with quite some force and shut the entrance door, locked it and walked off with his usual sadistic chuckle.

Spider groaned as he got to his feet; that had kind of hurt. He looked around and felt a feeling of unease about him; he could sense fear nearby. Spider coughed and sniffled his wet nose as he walked around. The tomb stones were no doubt real, they had names on them and different dates, and they even looked eroded by the weather. Spider spotted Quana sitting on a nearby tomb stone and walked over and sat on the one next to her.

"Hey Quana; you *cough* ok?" Asked Spider with concern for his friend even though he felt on edge himself.

"Not really; I really don't like graveyards. I really don't like that dead people lurk just beneath our feet. And the zombie effects Chris has added make things worse." Replied Quana shakily.

"Well I'm here … at *sneeze* least you're not alone *cough* right?" Said Spider with a friendly smile.

"That's true." Agreed Quana. "But we've got to spend hours here; and if I get scared so will you. If you can't complete your challenge it'll be my fault."

"I wouldn't *cough* hold it against you." Said spider as he took out his inhaler and breathed with it.

"You use an inhaler?" Asked Quana with interest.

"Yep; I sometimes *sneeze* have a little trouble breathing, or *cough* after a cough fit I need air *cough*. It's a pretty useful thing *cough* to have; it's possible to breath underwater *sneeze* with it."

"I rarely get sick; I have pretty strong immune systems." Said Quana as she stretched out. "How long have you been sick like you are?"

"As long as I can *gag* remember." Replied Spider solemnly. "It's white blood cell deficiency, I *big sneeze* have really poor immune systems. I'm only sixteen and *cough* I've had more than a thousand diseases *cough* in my lifetime. Currently I've got some *cough* unknown gut bug that nobody knows the cure for."

"That sounds pretty bad … but if you win you'll be able to get completely cured." Said Quana nicely.

"As nice as that *sneeze* would be … I don't think I'll *cough* last much longer. Nobody really likes a sick *cough* kid to much."

"Don't doubt yourself." Smiled Quana supportively. "You never know how well you will place until you've achieved it."

Spider smiled before sighing and looking at his shoes.

"Thanks; but I'm not *cough* particularly useful to the team. You're a great leader, Zita *cough* has loads of skills, Barney's full of energy *sneeze* and is really fast and actually smart, *cough* Jimmy is really nice and has done well at every challenge so *sneeze* far, Andy is smart and knows about space … and Eleanor *cough* is great with animals. As for me *cough*; I'm just the germy sick *sneeze* guy. I even threw up off the dock on day *cough* one."

Quana smiled and put a hand on Spider's shoulder.

"Don't doubt yourself; you've probably got some special talents in you just waiting to be unleashed, I know it!"

"Well … I can *cough* play the flute pretty well." Said Spider.

"You see; that's something you can offer to the team. And we kept you over Nakia right?" Smirked Quana nicely.

"I don't know how many *cough* votes I survived by though; I voted for *cough* Nakia … but as for everyone else?"

"Spider; EVERYONE voted for Nakia except herself, it was seven against one in favor of you staying and Nakia leaving." Explained Quana.

"Really?" Said spider in surprise. "Thanks very much … … so what now?"

"We'll just have to pass the time." Sighed Quana. "Talking to you took my mind off the cemetery but it's coming back."

"Hmm; these graves have *gag* weird names." Said Spider as he read some. "Jalckafraz … Big daddy *cough* Poltapog … _Smigdice_? Err … was there a *sneeze* period in time where hobo's and *cough* rappers ruled that I'm currently unaware of?"

Quana broke out in laughter and soon Spider began laughing as well.

* * *

**Confessional- Smigdice? What a weird name.**

**Spider: that … was a really ***cough*** nice conversation. It makes me feel ***cough*** happy when I make a new friend. But where did Chris ***cough*** get those graves from? Wacky land?**

**Quana: Spider told me most people don't give him a chance because of his sickness. Spider says he's used to it but I find that nasty. He's really nice when you get to know him. His illness doesn't bother me at all.**

* * *

In camp center three objects had been set up; a small tree, Uzuri's emo doll, and a button. In front of these objects were Irene, Yessica and Andy. Irene was looking at the tree fondly, Yessica eyed the emo doll is great fear and unrest while Andy just looked at the button is confusion.

"Ok you three." Said Chris. "Each of these items represents the fears of one of you. Your goal is to confront your fear. Irene; you must watch a tree burn without helping it."

"What?" Shrieked the tree hugger girl in horror.

"Yessica; you must hug the emo doll while it is saying one of it's creepy comments." Smiled Chris very nastily.

"W-w-w-what?" whimpered Yessica as she looked at the creepy doll staring at her blankly.

"And of course, Andy. You must press that button without showing any signs of fear." Said Chris.

"How is a button to do with thunder?" asked Andy is confusion.

"You'll see." Smirked Chris as he took out a lighter and approached the tree. He flicked on the flames and touched the tree with them.

"You can start on the count of three, one, two … three!" Yelled Chris, when he said three the tree burst into flames.

"AAAAARGH!" Screamed Irene as she panicked very badly and ran off to get a hose.

"No Irene!" Said Hector frantically. "We need the point! You can do it!"

Irene seemed to think otherwise as she ran back and unleashed a spray of water on the enflamed tree. The flames were extinguished and the tree was pretty burned; several leaves had turned to dust.

"Oh you poor tree.; do you need a hug?" Whimpered Irene in worry.

Yessica wasn't doing much better; she hadn't even approached the doll and she was freaking out on the spot.

"I can't do this." Whispered Yessica quietly.

"Yahaha!" Laughed Kasimar nastily. "What a cowardly little _girl_."

He was silenced by a kick to the balls from Xaria.

"My pleasure." Smirked Xaria.

Yessica took a step towards the doll and an intern pulled the string and it began to speak.

"_I'll rip out your eyes so you don't tell lies_! _Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the doll. This was all too much for Yessica.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh!" Screamed Yessica as he ran away into her cabin and under her bed.

"Looks like those two don't get a point." Laughed Chris. "Can Andy do any better; you get a point if you don't get scared."

Andy calmly walked towards the button and picked it up.

"This doesn't look so hard." Shrugged Andy as he pressed it.

BOOM!

The booming sound of lightning roared out from the button and Andy jumped.

"WHOA! What was that?" asked Andy as he quickly put the button down.

"The sound of thunder." Explained Chris. "Shame you don't get the point though."

"What?" asked Andy in anger. "But I did the challenge."

"But you made a scared sound; therefore you haven't conquered your phobia and you get no point." Laughed Chris.

"You're a vorgon!" Shot Andy.

* * *

**Confessional- Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy.**

**Yessica: I should have taken on that doll … but I couldn't. I hope Tabitha can save me from elimination, if she could it for Vinnie she can do it for me … right? **(She twiddles her thumbs nervously)

**Irene: That poor tree! Has Chris got no heart? I hope he gets his karma eventually. And this time it should be more than getting thrown in the lake! But looking back on it I should have tried a bit harder … but the burning tree kinda distracted me, so I hope I don't get voted out for it.**

**Andy: That was so unfair! I only jumped a little; that hardly even bothered me at all; I should have got that point! But while everyone has been doing their challenges Barney has been in that cage … I wonder how he's doing.**

* * *

Lavender was still lying on the beach relaxing in the sun. It felt nice to relax and soak up some rays. She was currently lying on her back and was quite comfortable. She wondered how long it would be until she had to do her challenge.

She sat up and stretched out. Barney was still in the cage and though sharks fins were circling him he looked fairly calm and if anything he looked like he was sleeping.

"Hey Barney; are you awake?" Called Lavender.

Barney looked up, apparently not asleep, and saw Lavender looking at him. He smiled and sat up.

"Ahoy me red headed sea lass; how are you?" Asked Barney.

"I'm fine … though I won't be for very long." Replied Lavender.

"Why not?" Called Barney.

"Because … I'm going to have to face my fear of scorpions." Said Lavender with a shiver. "They're terrible creatures!"

"I agree; but I'm having a great time out here yaaar!" Smiled Barney.

"How can you be?" Asked Lavender in a stunned voice. "You're in deep water surrounded by sharks! You should be terrified like most people!"

"Well I'm not like most people; I edge away from the crowd." Explained Barney. "And I have this cage to protect me so I'm in no danger."

Lavender nodded and lay on her side. A moment later she thought of something to ask him.

"If I may ask you Barney; why do you dress and act like a pirate?" Asked Lavender with great curiosity.

"Because they are my life long enthusiasm yaaar!" Grinned Barney. "And they're cool as Alaska."

"But don't you think that the accent is a bit much?" Said Lavender.

"I've never thought about it much; I've spoken like this for so long that it'd be fairly difficult to stop matie." Explained Barney.

"I can understand that; old habits die hard." Nodded Lavender.

Lavender lay back down while still facing the sea; she watched the shark fins moving about and wondered how Chris was going to get Barney out. She continued to watch the sea until she suddenly noticed something.

One of the sharks surfaced and shot forwards at a high speed; it was going right for the cage Barney was in.

"Barney! Look out!" Yelled Lavender.

Barney jumped up upon hearing that and spotted the shark approaching. Because of the cage containing him he couldn't get away. The sharp leapt up and crashed into the cage and it began to tip over.

"Oh crap yaaar!" Yelled Barney as he fell into the water and the sharks began closing in.

"Swim for it Barney!" Yelled Lavender frantically.

Barney began swimming to land at quite a speed; maybe as a pirate lover he had taken swimming lessons as well. It wasn't fast enough as a shark leapt on him and dragged him under.

"Someone help!" Yelled Lavender; she realized nobody was around and gained a brave expression. She was about to run in and help her opponent when a strange sight appeared before her.

Barney was wrestling with the shark and rib punching it at a very fast rate. He had a few rips in his cloths but otherwise looked fine. Barnet gave the shark one last hard wallop and it yelped and swam away. Barney staggered towards land and struck a pose.

"I'm not going to Davey Jones locker yet." Smiled Barney as he swayed on the spot.

"Are you ok?" Asked Lavender in shock at what had just happened.

"Just a shark attack; nothing too bad. I don't think I'm afraid of them any more." Shrugged Barney as he dusted himself off and looked out at the tipped cage. "I wonder if the point still counts."

"Of course it will; after that you could potentially sue the shoe." Said Lavender. "And I have friends who have lawyer's parents."

"Well you can't sue me because shark attacks are covered in your contracts." Said Chris as he walked up and saw the overturned cage surrounded by sharks. "Too bad Barney; if you'd stayed in that cage a minute longer you would have passed, I'm afraid you don't get a point."

"What?" Snarled Barney. "I won that challenge, I can't that the peg legged cage fell over yaaar!"

"Too bad, too sad." Smiled Chris sadistically. "But Lavender may win a point as it's her turn next. A scorpion awaits you in camp so follow me and prepare for a fright."

Lavender gulped and followed Chris with Barney tagging along.

"Why are you coming Barney?" Asked Lavender. "It's not your challenge."

"I know sea lass; but you were with me during mine so it would be the pirate way to watch you do yours." Smiled Barney.

"Thanks." Said Lavender gratefully.

* * *

**Confessional- Achievement unlocked; defeat a shark!**

**Lavender: That was so unfair; Chris should have counted that! Barney may be my opponent … but he could have died! The last Chris could have done is give Barney a point … and maybe some medical attention. Chris' bad karma is starting to build up indeed.**

**Barney: Arrrrr; it could have done worse me hearties! I could have had my limbs eaten. But I conquered my fear despite not getting a point, a little a disappointing but still an accomplishment.**

**Chris: I'm awesome and nobody matters but me; I hope the contestants learn that soon.**

* * *

Lavender was in camp center with Chris and Barney; in front of her was a table with a clear lidless box on it. Inside the lidless box was a small scorpion.

"Ok Lavender; all you have to do is touch the scorpion." Explained Chris before he grumbled. "Originally I wanted you to get stung by it but when I was told the resulting possibility of your death I sadly had to change it. Just touch it for a point."

"But it looks so horrible." Said Lavender weakly. "And what if it stings me?"

"Then you'll get medical attention but you can't sue us as scorpion stings are mentioned on your contract." Shrugged Chris.

"Well … I'll try." Said Lavender as she approached the scorpion.

The stinging crustacean looked up at her and snapped its claws. Lavender looked at Chris; he was smirking in amusement, what a dick.

She looked at Barney and he gave her the thumbs up. Lavender looked back at the scorpion and took a deep breathe. She quickly reached in and touched the scorpion and then very quickly removed her hand to avoid being stung.

"And you get the point." Said Chris. "I would have thought you would have failed but clearly you're not a spineless coward like Carlton."

Lavender growled at Chris before turning to Barney.

"Thanks for the support." Smiled Lavender.

"It was nothing." Smiled Barney.

Lavender and Barney left in opposite directions as Tabitha walked into camp. She looked at the two exiting campers and after a moment of thought shrugged. Chris walked up to her holding a flower.

"Hi Tabitha." Smiled Chris.

"Eww! Get away from me you pedophile." Shrieked Tabitha in disgust.

"Chris looked puzzled and then looked at the flower.

"Oh crap." Mumbled Chris before smiling again. "We can edit that out; it's time for your challenge."

"So I have to sniff the flower or something?" Asked Tabitha.

"Yep; but it's got a bee in it." Smirked Chris.

Tabitha blinked and glared at Chris.

"You're even worse than me." Shot Tabitha as she quickly sniffed the flower; as she withdrew a bee flew out and zoomed away.

"Damn it!" Whined Chris in a sudden tantrum. "You were supposed to get stung!"

"Better luck next time gel boy." Smirked Tabitha. "But I get the point right?"

"Sure; whatever." Snapped Chris. "Just go; it's time for Wallace's challenge anyway."

* * *

**Confessional- An adult that cries?**

**Tabitha: Chris is in a way like Dr Robotnik; he's intelligent and has power … yet he throws a childish temper tantrum when his plans go wrong. Seeing him throw a hissy fit is somewhat amusing really.**

* * *

Wallace was standing by a small fold out road next to an old lady. Chris stood on the other side and gestured to the old lady.

"Ok Wallace; to score a point for your team all you have to do is help the old lady across the street." Explained Chris. "I warn you though … she smells of prunes."

"How about a kiss for you Grammy?" Asked the old woman to Wallace.

"I'm not your grandson old lady; I'm the great evil Wallace! Mwahahahaha!"

"Alistair you say?" Replied the apparently half death woman.

"No, Wallace!" Snapped Wallace.

"Ulysses?" Asked the woman again, once more incorrect.

"Wallace!" Groaned Wallace in exasperation.

"Hank?" Said the old woman as she cupped her ear.

"Wallace you old bat!" Roared Wallace.

"Oh; sorry about that Walter, my hearing isn't all it once was."

"Arrrrr! Let's just get this over with." Growled Wallace.

The evil villain practically dragged the old lady across the road and to the other side next to Chris.

"I had better get that point." Growled Wallace.

"Sure you do; that was really funny television." Chuckled Chris.

"Yes! Evil wins again! Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically.

"That's a funny laugh you have George." Said the old lady as she reached for Wallace's face cheeks.

"Keep away!" Yelled Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- Pinch those cheeks!**

**Wallace: **(His cheeks have pinch marks on them). **Now I remember why I hate old people. Maybe I could invent cheek armour? It would be like my old days as an inventor … though some things are best left forgotten.**

* * *

Jimmy had been called to camp center for his challenge. He was currently in a stare down with an intern dressed as Freddie Krueger. The outfit was very realistic and frightening; complete with burns and razor glove.

"Ok Jimmy; just defeat Freddie and you win." Said Chris before laughing sadistically. "But I doubt you can do it; you're just a weak little kid and Freddie *loves* little boys and girls. Haha!"

"Not funny Chris!" Said Jimmy fearfully as the intern raised the glove.

The intern began walking towards Jimmy and Jimmy shook with fear as he backed up.

"And Jimmy is off to a poor start and our resident slasher villain gets the upper hand." Commentated Chris.

"You can do it yaaar!" Called Barney with a thumbs up.

Jimmy gulped and stopped backing away as the intern got closer. It was practically touching him; Jimmy made a noise that sounded like a mouse being trodden on by a boot.

"You cab do it Jimmy!" Cheered Eleanor from the side lines. "To face your phobia's you've just gotta believe in yourself!"

Jimmy glanced at his team mates and then at the Freddie intern; a look of determination spread across his face.

"Die zombie!" Yelled Jimmy as he tackled 'Freddie' to the floor as he began to attack.

"Help! Get him off me!" Pleaded the intern.

"I don't know; this is kinda amusing." Chuckled Chris.

"Please!" Begged the intern as Jimmy began rib punching him.

"…..Nah!" Laughed Chris.

"If there was a TV trope called 'designated dick' then you would be the living embodiment of it!" Wailed the intern.

"Ok Jimmy; take five!" Called Barney.

Jimmy looked up and quickly stopped what he was doing. He looked apologetically at the intern.

"Are you ok?" Asked Jimmy with concern.

"Other than a broken spleen I think I'm fine." Replied the intern as he got up and quickly left.

Chris blinked in surprise and shrugged.

"Against all odds and expectations Jimmy has earned a point for Team Puzzle." Said Chris in disbelief. "I would have thought the runt would have wet himself … but not everyone is Carlton. Next up is … Vinnie!"

Vinnie gulped as all eyes fell on him.

"Your challenge is simple; just eat an Easter egg." Said Chris before laughing. "But I doubt you can do it. I mean seriously; who's scared of an Easter egg? I can understand some food related fears like meat … but Easter eggs? That's just stupid!"

An intern came up with an Easter egg and placed it on a table that had been previously set up.

"Face your fear or walk the dock of shame." Said Chris with a sneer. "The choice is yours."

Vinnie shivered as he looked at the egg shaped chocolaty treat before him. It was as if it was taunting him. While some people watching were silent with understanding and respect; some were a little more vocal.

"What a coward; scared of an Easter egg!" Sneered Kasimar with a brutish laugh. "He gives Russia a worse name than it already had!"

At that moment Oscar punched Kasimar in the side of the head which made him fall to the floor.

"Ouch." Said Kasimar blankly as he lay in pain.

Vinnie felt some anger surge through him; how dare that asshole bully insult him for having a fear; Kasimar had one as well and he hadn't faced his yet. Vinnie quickly marched towards the Easter egg and ate it at turbo speed; it was gone in two seconds flat.

"And Vinnie gets the point." Said Chris with a disappointed look. "Personally I was hoping for some crying or screaming … but we can't have everything."

* * *

**Confessional- Eggs or bunnies; which is better?**

**Vinnie: that … was hard. But I shouldn't get voted of if we lose. Still; why does Kasimar enjoy upsetting people so much? I guess some people are as twisted as the game twister. Gary told me about Karma; what goes around will eventually come around. The way Kasimar is going he's going to be hit hard by a tsunami of karma.**

**Jimmy: I did it! Freddie Krueger is outta here; it may have just been a dressed up intern but if I can do that I'm ready for the real thing if he appears in a nightmare again. But while I'm in here … wonder why Vinnie would be afraid of Easter eggs? They taste great!**

* * *

Gary sat shivering alone in a corner in the darkness of the shack he was to stay in. Hector had left a fair while ago so he was alone in the dark. Gary didn't have a watch so he had lost track of the time.

"Oh how much longer must I stay in here?" Asked Gary aloud despite knowing full well he wouldn't get an answer. "It's cold and dark … and I'm alone."

The frigid cold that had caused Hector to leave had vanished but even so it was still pretty cold. Gary let out a sigh as he lay back against the wall.

"So this is how Jelly Jiggler feels." Said Gary bitterly.

A few seconds of silence passed; the silence ended when the door of the shack opened and glorious daylight poured into the room. Gary's eyes blinked a little before growing accustomed to it. He stood up and walked to the door and saw an intern.

"Congratulations Gary Boltok; you have passed your challenge and get a point for Team Jungle. You may now leave the shack." Said the intern.

Gary couldn't have gotten out of the shack faster. Once in sunlight again he let out a content sigh.

"Thank God that's over." Said Gary in relief. "I wonder how the others are doing. Might as well go and find out.

Gary left the area to find his team mates though what he didn't know was that all of them had already either won or failed their challenges.

* * *

**Confessional- Dark deeds and assassins creeds.**

**Gary: Looking back on it … that wasn't really such a bad thing. Yes; I was trapped in the dark completely alone … but I still passed and thus if we do lose I probably won't be voted out. But I wonder what made everything go so cold that Hector had to leave. I suspect foul play … from Wallace.**

* * *

Raven was at the bottom of the hole. It was starting to get dark and though she wasn't scared of the dark … it would make the hole scarier.

"It's been two hours according to my watch … but nobody has come for me yet. How much longer will I have to stay down here?" Sighed Raven as she put her head to her hands.

Raven heard a rustle above her and unease settled into her systems.

"Err … is a-anybody up t-there?" Called Raven nervously.

No voice responded; just more rustling. Raven was by now a little afraid; could it be sasquatchinaquwa?

"Boo!" Yelled Chris as he revealed himself above. Raven nearly screamed but managed to control herself.

"Is m-my challenge o-over?" Called Raven hopefully. "My watch says it's been two hours already."

"It is the end yes … but if you'd screamed you would have lost the point. Shame." Whined Chris. "But nonetheless; I'll toss down a rope ladder since I'm not allowed to leave you there all night."

The rope ladder was thrown down and Raven quickly climbed up; fighting the urge to ask Chris if he would have really left her down the hole.

"Ok then Raven; a winner is you." Sighed Chris. "I bet Chef five bucks you wouldn't do it. Looks like I can't buy a Latté now. You can go back to camp; we've got just a few challenges left to do. I'll go and see if Spider and Quana have chickened out yet. If they haven't … that's another five bucks down the drain."

* * *

**Confessional- I hate lattés!**

**Raven: I don't t-think I like Chris too m-much. He's a bit of a j-jerk. But winning my challenge w-w-wasn't so b-bad … though I don't w-want to d-do it again anytime s-soon.**

**Chris: **(He seems to be throwing a tantrum). **I want my latté now!**

* * *

Spider and Quana were still in the cemetery and were starting to feel a little unnerved. The amusing names on the tomb stones had stopped being funny a while ago and they sat on tree stumps with their knees drawn up.

"How long have we been here?" Asked Quana as she shivered a little.

"I don't *cough* know." Replied Spider. "It's getting dark now *sneeze* and we were here when it was light … so I think *cough* a few hours."

"How much longer must we suffer?" Groaned Quana. "If we pass then our team gets two points but is the stress worth it?"

"I'm hoping it *cough* is." Said Spider as he let out a sigh. "Knowing Chris; we'll be *cough* here all night long."

"Oh no." Whimpered Quana. "Cemeteries are even worse at night. In most media that's the time that the monsters leave their graves."

"All in fiction." Pointed out Spider. "Monsters don't really *cough* bother me; as Edward Carnby once *cough* said 'devil worship makes me laugh' *cough*. It's the fear it causes *sneeze* that I don't like."

"Who's Edward Carnby?" Asked Quana with a raised eyebrow. "That name sounds quite old."

"It's from a survival horror *cough* video game at the hospital. It's set in the *gag* nineteen twenties. Monsters. Zombies and occult galore … gave me *cough* nightmares for a *cough* week."

"Why did you play it then?" Asked Quana in confusion.

"To try and be cool." Replied Spider. "I'm not exactly *cough* considered 'hip'."

"I don't think popularity matters much; at school I treat everyone equally regardless of popularity … to be honest I prefer to hang out with the less popular people. I really don't like the 'libbies' who make peoples lives hard because of their popularity … people kinda like Nakia, though a bit smarter."

"I don't really *cough* go to school much." Said Spider. "I'm off sick so much I have my own *cough* personal room at hospital. My school work is sent *sneeze* to the hospital and I do it there. I usually get *cough* around an A."

"Ok scaredy cats; are you still here?" Called Chris as he unlocked the door of the cemetery.

Spider and Quana quickly ran up; Chris groaned to himself and stamped his feet angrily.

"Darn it! That's another five bucks I've lost." Whined Chris. "That's two latté's I'll have to do without!"

"Are lattés all you think about?" Blinked Quana. "It's just coffee … I bet if you had an assistant you would fire him or her over a cold coffee!"

"Probably." Shrugged Chris. "You both get a point; you may now leave the cemetery."

Quana didn't need to be told twice and quickly bolted out the open doors. Spider followed coughing as he went.

* * *

**Confessional: Out from the graves … the victims of the waves.**

**Quana: I'm glad I won't have to do that again … having Spider around helped me quite a lot. And since I was calm he was as well; this didn't end too badly. Scared, fearful and shivering, this is not how I will end it … why do I feel I've heard something like that before. **(Shrugs). **Whatever it was from can't have been a good show even with singing.**

**Spider: All in all that was kinda … fun. I guess ***cough*** talking to someone eases my *cough*phobia. And I passed; I didn't think I** *sneeze*** could do it … looks like we all have to eat ***cough*** our words at some point in our lives.**

* * *

A short while later back at camp the final challengers were being set up. Oscar was currently seated in a bungee jump seat and looked quite shaky.

"How exactly is this to do with heights?" Asked Oscar to Chris with a look of annoyance.

"You'll go very high and once there you just have to wait until you come back down … easy point."

"Wouldn't it be easier to just put me on a high platform?" exclaimed Oscar angrily.

"That would be boring." Shrugged Chris. "And nobody wants that."

"You know what? _You're_ boring!" Snapped Oscar.

Chris looked like he had been shot in the head and snarled.

"I'm not boring! I'm interesting; I'll show you boring!" Screamed Chris in rage.

Since Oscar was already strapped in Chris wasted no time in pressing the bungee button. With a burst of force Oscar was propelled high into the air up above camp.

"Aaaayeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Yelled Oscar as he reached the peak of his flight and began to fall back down to earth.

CRASH!

An Oscar shaped crater appeared on the ground as the chair landed back into position; clearly he hadn't been strapped in enough.

"That … kinda hurt." Groaned Oscar as he climbed out of the hole and glared at Chris. "Do you even have any friends?"

"Who needs friends when you're the hottest and best person ever?" Said Chris smugly. "Maybe you'll calm down when I inform you that you just earned a point for Team Grenade."

Oscar stopped growling but still glared at Chris as he joined the crowd of those who had already done their challenges.

"The next challenge ought to really _heat_ things up." Laughed Chris sadistically as he rubbed his hands together in excitement.

* * *

**Confessional- Bungeeeeeeeee!**

**Oscar: The least Chris could have done is make sure I was strapped in properly … but noooooo, I have to fall out in mid air and make a crater! I swear Chris has level grinded from simply a dick into a complete monster!**

**Zita: I was next … and it wasn't going to be easy. Chris could have had me put out fire! But no … he takes it too far.**

* * *

Zita stood shaking like a small tree on a windy day; in front of her was a burning shack. And what Chris had planned wasn't a nice thing at all.

"Ok Zita; all you have to do is go in that burning building for five minutes." Said Chris brutally with a smile.

"What?" Paled Zita. "That could kill me!"

"Maybe, maybe not." Shrugged Chris. "Now; the shack might fall down upon you while you're in there … but if you die you automatically get the point."

"I … don't know if I can do this." Said Zita shakily.

"Chicken! Bwak bwaaak bwaaaak!" Taunted Kasimar from the sidelines. Oscar punched him again to shut him up.

"Sorry guys; I can't do it." Said Zita apologetically to her team mates as she slowly walked back into the crowd.

"Don't worry about *cough* it; it's no problem." Smiled Spider.

"You did your best." Agreed Jimmy.

"And that challenge looked suicidal yaaar!" Said barney. "Who agrees?"

Everyone nodded.

"Thanks guys." Smiled Zita.

"Ok enough of the niceness!" Snapped Chris. "It's time for another challenge, this time … its Xaria's turn."

Xaria stepped forwards with her usual bored expression and stood before Chris with folded arms.

"What do I have to do?" Asked Xaria. "Hopefully it won't leave me scarred as much as I already am."

"Nothing big … just close your eyes." Said Chris while trying to hold back a laugh.

Xaria grumbled to herself and closed her eyes. She could hear Chris take something out from behind him but paid it no attention. He was going to probably hold a squid in front of her or something. Xaria scoffed at the idea; she didn't fear squids, just mind flayers.

"Ok; open your eyes." Said Chris with a sadistic voice.

Xaria sighed and opened her eyes; she immediately wished she hadn't…

In front of her was Chris but to Xaria Chris was gone; in place of Chris's head was a horrifying and awfully realistic mind flayer mask, complete with writhing tentacles. Its eyes appeared to be glowing … and it was but an inch from her face.

"AAARGH!" Cried Xaria before rearing back her leg and sending it full force at the mind flayer's crotch.

"There goes Chris junior." Whimpered Chris as he collapsed to the ground in pain; the mask fell off and revealed Chris sobbing.

"…Are you crying?" Asked Xaria with a rare smile of amusement.

"Shut up meanie face!" Growled Chris in a squeaky voice as he got up and dusted himself off. "And despite committing the terrible crime of causing me pain … I award Xaria the point."

Team Grenade, minus Kasimar, cheered at getting yet another point and as Xaria went over to them they congratulated her.

"Only one challenge is left now." Said Chris. "Can anyone guess who hasn't gone yet?"

Oscar thought for a moment before a smirk appeared on his face; he turned to Kasimar who was clearly shaking.

"Well Kasimar; surely after calling other people cowards you'll have no problem doing your challenge." Chuckled Oscar.

"I'm not doing it." Said Kasimar with a snarl.

"You so are." Replied Oscar. "Everyone else on our team has completed their challenges … it's only you left."

"Make me." Sneered Kasimar.

Oscar happily obliged.

Oscar grabbed Kasimar and raised him over his head as if the bully weighed nothing.

"Which way is that dentist chair?" Asked Oscar as some other campers began to laugh.

"Actually … hold on a moment." Said Chris while thinking.

"What is it?" Asked Oscar as he dropped Kasimar to the ground.

"If everyone but Kasimar has completed their challenges on your team … then Kasimar doesn't have to do anything." Said Chris. "It seems … that Team Grenade has won!"

Kasimar pumped his fist and laughed.

"Yahahaha! And I didn't have to do a thing!" Cackled the bully in triumph.

"Oh you've got to be choking me." Growled Lavender. "He didn't do anything!"

"That'll bring in ratings." Smirked Chris. "Before I reveal the losers … today's first place reward that Team Grenade will be getting is a boxed collection of the nightmare on elm street each!"

Kasimar cheered in contentment; he loved horror movies, the nastier the better. Raven however didn't look to content with the prize.

"Can I get a d-different prize?" Asked raven shyly.

"Nope!" Laughed Chris. "Now … the losers of today who have only gotten three points out of a possible seven are…

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Team Jungle!"

"Not _again_!" Groaned Tabitha in annoyance.

"Yep; you seven are fair game tonight. The ceremony begins in one hour so vote for who you want gone." Said Chris with a hearty laugh. "And Team puzzle; you're second, no prize but no ceremony. I would be having a latté now … but because I lost ten bucks gambling I can't. So … see you in an hour Team Jungle."

Chris left to presumably get his hair done as Team Jungle collectively sighed; they had lost the challenge as well as all hope of getting an advantage over Team Puzzle and Team Grenade.

* * *

**Confessional- We are the losers! No time for champions!**

**Zita: Too bad I couldn't face my fear ... but at least my team wasn't angry. They're pretty nice.**

**Yessica: This doesn't look good … I couldn't face my fear and we're gonna vote someone off … if I go now I'll never get to see a swimming challenge. I'm sure Irene will vote with me, we're best friends … I suppose voting for Uzuri is my only hope really.**

**Uzuri: This is a tough vote … I don't really think anybody is useless but I have to vote for somebody. I'm not going to vote for myself though. What should I do?**

**Tabitha: I think it's time to put my manipulation powers to their first test on this island; I won't tell everyone who to vote for … just a few; enough to guarantee success. **(Winks to the camera and smiles wickedly which reveals her surprisingly sharp teeth)

* * *

Uzuri had left the medical tent a while ago but had unfortunately missed the end of the competition; Vinnie had informed her that they had lost and somebody would be voted out. Uzuri hoped it wouldn't be her. The ceremony was in about half an hour and that could be the last half an hour she would spend on this island.

"Who should I vote for; give me a sign." Said Uzuri to the sky.

She then tripped over something and looked back; a stop sign was lying on the ground and looked out of place.

"Thanks but I didn't mean that type of sign." Called Uzuri to the sky again.

Tabitha looked at Uzuri from behind a tree and chuckled to herself; she had found someone to convince. It would be pretty easy as Uzuri saw her as a friend already. Tabitha decided to make her move.

"Hello Uzuri." Said Tabitha as she casually walked out from her hiding place.

"Oh hi Tabitha." Smiled Uzuri. "Looks like we're on the chopping block tonight; just like chickens a few decades ago."

"It seems that way." Agreed Tabitha. "So … who are you voting for tonight? Not me right?"

"Of course not; you're my best friend." Smiled Uzuri. "I haven't decided yet."

"_That will make things much easier_." Though Tabitha before speaking. "I've been looking into the case of people wanting to hurt your doll …and Fifi wasn't the one who started it."

"Really?" Asked Uzuri in surprise. "Who started it? Was it Kasimar?"

"As much of a dick as he is; it was not him." Said Tabitha. "It was…"

Tabitha looked around before whispering the name in Uzuri's ear. Uzuri's eyes widened and she scowled.

"It's always who you least expect … don't worry Tabitha, I know who to vote for now; I'll go and do that right now!" Said Uzuri determinedly.

Uzuri sped off to vote as Tabitha smirked.

"Too easy; now who's next?"

* * *

A few minutes later Tabitha saw Gary alone in the mess hall; he was balancing cups in unusual positions.

"Time to get to work." Whispered Tabitha to herself as she entered the mess hall and got a drink of water so Gary wouldn't question her for asking him immediately. Once the water was swallowed Tabitha pretended to only just spot Gary.

"Hi Gary." Falsely smiled Tabitha as she sat down next to the teenage Chef.

Gary looked to her and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Good evening Tabitha; how are you?"

"I'm fine … though our Team isn't; soon we'll be down to six while everyone else has seven." Sighed Tabitha in pretend sadness. "I'm must not be a very good leader."

"It's not your fault Tabitha." Said Gary supportively. "It's just this isn't the type of challenge that leadership can win. But hey; we both faced our fears didn't we?"

"Quite true." Agreed Tabitha as she began to put her plan in motion. "If I may ask … who did you vote for? I doubt it was me or Vinnie we passed our challenges."

"Of course; I'm not going to get rid of somebody who actually did good; I'm still deciding. I was thinking of voting for Irene. She performed pretty weakly and if there is a challenge involving water Yessica will be useful. Hector's my friend and Uzuri … well, she's sweet."

"Well Irene could be a good choice … but I've found something out." Said Tabitha craftily.

"What's that?" Asked Gary.

"Well; I think there is someone is this team who thinks your cooking is worse than fried puke."

"What?" Said Gary in shock. "I've been doing my best! Who said that?"

Tabitha looked around before whispering the name. Gary looked surprised but nodded.

"So; did the 'individual' say anything else?"

"Just that you give catering a bad name and that … well … you're a midget."

Gary blinked and then snarled.

"Insulting my height and cooking; what a low blow!" Growled Gary. "Thank you for telling me this Tabitha. Usually I let insults slide … but those two areas are things I'm sensitive about."

Gary un-piled the cups and left for the confessional to cast his vote.

"Too easy!" Laughed Tabitha once Gary was out of earshot. "Looks like everything is going just fine."

* * *

**Confessional- The spy who manipulated me.**

**Gary: **(Angry). **Nobody insults my cooking and height on the same night! That was below the belt. It was good of Tabitha to tell me that; I'm definitely voting for **(Static cuts him off)

**Vinnie: Well; I think I'm safe since I faced my fear … but as for my vote? Due to her pretty abysmal performance; I'm voting for Irene. Yessica is more useful and I'm not voting for Uzuri; she's my friend, just like Hector.**

**Tabitha: I didn't ask Vinnie to vote with me as he ay have told Gary; if both guys talked about it and realized that I talked to them both then it wouldn't be good for me or my plans. This will be good; too bad we have to vote someone ff though; but whatever it takes I suppose. I vote for **(Static cuts her off).

* * *

It was about nine o clock at night on Wawanakwa; the sky had gone dark a while ago and the votes had been cast. Gary, Tabitha and Uzuri sat on stumps while everyone else sat on the logs. Every now and then Gary and Uzuri shot looks at one of the others; though the person in question was blissfully unaware and just sat calmly. Chris soon turned up with a tray of six marshmallows.

"Team Jungle; back again so soon? Hopefully you won't be the killer bass all over again." Said Chris as he looked at the team in almost dissaprovment. "As you can see; I have a tray of six marshmallow … and yet there are seven of you. If my C grade math is right then one of you will not get a marshmallow, that person is out and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back … *ever*."

Chris chuckled at the looks of worry on the faces of a few of the campers before he set down the trap on the empty oil barrel and prepared to hand them out.

"The first marshmallow tonight goes to … Gary."

Gary smiled and got up from his stump and walked over to Chris and took his sugary safety symbol.

"Tabitha; you're safe as well so don't worry."

"Good luck everyone." Smiled Tabitha as she claimed her own marshmallow and winked at Gary who nodded in response.

"Next marshmallow goes to Vinnie." Said Chris as he held it up for all to see.

The short metal armed guy took his marshmallow and stood with Tabitha and Gary.

Irene, Hector, Yessica and Uzuri were still seated and gazed silently at the three remaining marshmallows.

"You four couldn't face your fears." Said Chris is disappointment. "All but one of you got votes … and the voteless person is Hector, come on up big guy."

Hector arose and Chris passed him the marshmallow before turning back to the others.

"Well girls … who's it going to be?" Asked Chris with a smug smile. "I can tell you that it won't be …

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Irene."

Irene smiled and ate her marshmallow as Chris gave it to her. Only Yessica and Uzuri were left. Yessica shivered and looked at the marshmallow with wide eyes while Uzuri looked a tad nervous as she glanced at the final marshmallow. Chris picked up the final marshmallow and began to speak.

"This is the final marshmallow of the night girls. Whoever does not get it must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers and you can't *ever* come back *EVER*. This sweet sugary symbol of island safety goes to…

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Uzuri."

Uzuri smiled happily in great relief as she ran to get her marshmallow. Yessica sighed and hung her head.

"Well Yessica; you lasted five days; I'm afraid you're out." Said Chris as he tossed the empty tray to Yessica's feet. "The dock of shame is that way."

Yessica rose to her feet and smiled to her former team mates.

"See you around guys." Smiled Yessica weakly.

"Bye Yessica; have fun at the playa." Waved Irene.

Yessica smiled before sighing and walking towards the dock. She reached the end of the wooden boards and boarded the boat of losers which promptly left the island with Yessica.

Chris looked at the disappearing boat on the horizon for a moment before turning to the surviving six.

"Well everyone; it's just you six left. You're at a disadvantage now. I would have thought you'd do pretty good … but as much as I hate to admit it; I have been wrong before. Goodnight; you'll need rest for the big challenge tomorrow."

The five of the six remaining members of team Jungle trudged back to their cabin while Tabitha entered the confessional.

* * *

**Confessional- A villain is born.**

**Tabitha: It's quite simple really; I am very charismatic. Getting Uzuri's vote was simple and gary, while a little harder, was easy since I know where he is vulnerable. I'm guessing Irene and Yessica voted or Uzuri though I don't know who Hector and Vinnie voted for … but that's not important. If you're a major antagonist you mustn't let your goals get too high. I may have only just managed to get Yessica voted off … but that small bit made all the difference. And as long as I succeed I have no need to worry about elimination.**

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a smile on his face. He looked quite happy about something; though he didn't have his usual latté.

"Awesome! A villain even worse than Heather, maybe a bad person will win this time. I expect great things from Tabitha … though I'm sure Kasimar will bring in ratings as well. So Yessica is gone and team Jungle is getting chopped down. Will they bounce back? Or will they fail? Tune in next time to find out that, and more importantly, see more of me on Total Drama letterz!"

* * *

**Votes**

**Gary- Yessica**

**Vinnie- Irene**

**Hector- Yessica**

**Tabitha- Yessica**

**Yessica- Uzuri**

**Irene- Uzuri**

**Uzuri- Yessica**

**Total**

**Yessica- 4**

**Uzuri- 2**

**Irene- 1**

* * *

**Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica**

* * *

And Tabitha has made her first major move and has taken Yessica out. Sorry to Yessica fans but she wasn't really a major character. You'll see her again in the aftermath though. No harm no foul right?


	12. Day 6, Part 1, Barney, professor of love

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the season that must never be named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme, that belongs to Frank15. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please, do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This story contains nose picking, bullying, evil laughter, a crazy genki pirate and some bad language. Nothing M rated though.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana, BarneyxLavender, GaryxRaven, AndyxMable, JimmyxEleanor, VinniexUzuri. And one other I'm keeping secret for now.

**Note: **I would have had this out sooner but I was busy with school work and some stuff in real life. But it's here now and you can all enjoy it.

Read on!

* * *

As usual Chris Maclean was standing on the dock of shame; he lacked the usual latté as he had lost money from gambling. Chris nonetheless still had a smile on his face. The cameraman intern gave him the signal and he began his recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was pant wittingly scary as the twenty one campers had to face their worst fears. If you thought last years losers had weird phobias then how about this? Easter Eggs, Freddy Krueger, fear itself and even an emo doll. Haha!" Laughed Chris back handedly. "Some contestants couldn't do their challenge and chickened out. That or they didn't complete it properly. Send me all the hate mail you want; you're obviously jealous that I'm better than you."

Chris basked in the sound of his own voice for a moment before resuming his speech.

"Team Grenade won once again with six of the seven on their team completing their challenges. Team Puzzle narrowly avoided elimination as they had only scored four points. And that left Team Jungle in last place with only three points. I'm seriously wondering if none of them will make it to the merge. Anyone could have gone but not if Tabitha had anything to say about it!"

Chris pulled out a giant sponge glove like the ones at baseball games with the name Tabitha written on it.

"Besides Kasimar Tabitha is my favorite; she's so darn sneaky! First she uses Uzuri's trust of her to her advantage and lies about Yessica wanting to hurt her doll. Uzuri was successfully manipulated. After that she spoke to Gary and told him that Yessica had insulted his height and cooking; two things he is sensitive about. That was two votes for Yessica; with Tabitha's vote it was three."

Chris waved the sponge hand in the air and smiled.

"At the bonfire ceremony Yessica got the boot thanks to Tabitha. It's great we finally have a true competitor. But could a threat be building up under Tabitha's nose? Gary and Hector have an alliance and that could potentially threaten Tabitha's chances. I'm the host and even I don't know what's going to happen next! Who will be eliminated? Who will miss the boat? And when will I get my latté? Find out on this episode of Total Drama Letterz!

(Theme Song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

It was day time on the Island of Wawanakwa; the twenty campers were out of bed and already outside. The weather was fairly sunny and most campers were enjoying themselves one way or another. After Yessica's elimination Team Jungle was at a disadvantage; something Tabitha wanted to fix.

Speak of the devil Tabitha was currently on the beach with Uzuri. While Uzuri simply played in the sand Tabitha was thinking what her next move would be.

"_Think Tabitha; your team is at a disadvantage and if you want the money that is not good at all. Making a scapegoat is fine … but you need to get your team to actually win_." Though Tabitha to herself. "_I need an alliance; Uzuri will surely join me as she thinks I'm her best friend … freak. But what of the others? Vinnie still owes me; I'll collect on that soon … I'll think about this. But why worry? I've gotten Daisy, Fifi and Yessica eliminated already; I can do it again_."

"Hey Tabitha?" Said Uzuri. "You look a little upset; are you ok?"

"Oh it's nothing Uzuri; I'm just thinking about the state of our team. We're losing; there has to be some way we can prevent another loss."

"Maybe if we work really hard and vigorously we can do it." Smiled Uzuri.

"Uzuri … I'm your friend right?" Asked Tabitha.

"Of course! You're my best friend!" Said Uzuri sweetly. "Why?"

"Well … I was thinking. Would you like to … join an alliance with me?"

Uzuri looked surprised and thought for a moment.

"I don't know; will it be like Heather's alliance?"

"No it won't be; I'll treat you with respect and we'll make it work. Join me … and we can get to the final two; what do you say?"

Tabitha extended her hand for a shake. Uzuri thought for a few seconds and looked at Tabitha. After a moment of silence she smiled and shook Tabitha's hand.

"Go Team Alpha Saw Squad!" Giggled Uzuri.

"Is that the alliance name?" Smirked Tabitha while inwardly feeling disgusted.

"I thought we needed one." Said Uzuri.

"Don't worry; it'll do for now." Said Tabitha while thinking. "_Until I don't need you anymore_."

* * *

**Confessional- I sense some bad stuff is going to happen.**

**Uzuri: This is great; I've finally made a friend and she is willing to work with me. This contest keeps getting better and better! Maybe if I win I'll split the money with Tabitha.**

**Tabitha: Normally I wouldn't even spit at people like Uzuri; they don't deserve my acknowledgement. But in contests like this you find yourself working with those you usually wouldn't. Now I have a guaranteed vote on my side … and if our team ever gets to about three or four members the person I want gone shall go. Still; Uzuri is scum on the earth's surface … but she doesn't know the real me and that's how it's going to stay. Until I get rid of her anyway.**

* * *

Irene was sitting on the edge of the dock feeling a little … angsty. Her best friend Yessica was gone and she was basically alone on Wawanakwa. Sure; Uzuri and Tabitha were fine and the guys were generally ok … but she just felt alone.

"I wonder why Yessica went and not me?" Pondered Irene. "I performed weakly last challenge; Yessica's challenge was harder so how come I stayed?"

Irene sighed again as a fish swam beneath her feet; as she sat Andy came up to her.

"Hey Irene; you ok?" Asked Andy as he sat beside her.

"Not really; Yessica got voted off yesterday and now I basically feel kinda, well, lonely. I may have friends but Yessica was my best friend."

"You're still in the contest right?" Said Andy supportively.

"True; but for how long?" Asked Irene.

"We could all go at anytime … I'm hoping to at least make the merge, but I may lose. That's the way the game goes sometime. I'd like the money to become an astronaut." Said Andy as he looked up at the sky.

"I think this is the first time we've spoken." Said Irene.

"I believe it is." Nodded Andy. "So far everyone seems to have been only talking with their Team Mates. Barney may be my best friend here … but making new friends is always fun."

"How is it on Team Puzzle?" Asked Irene as she pulled her knees up to herself.

"It's fine … though we seem to come second a lot." Shrugged Andy. "It's pretty nice though. With Nakia gone we all get along. Jimmy really keeps up our morale. And Barney is like a genki guy."

"Does he like anything other than pirates?" Asked Irene.

"Well; though pirates are his obsession Barney does have moments of great intelligence but doesn't say anything about his school life." Explained Andy. "There is also Spider."

"Isn't he the sick germy guy?" Asked Irene hesitantly.

"Yep; but he can't help it. Spider says he's got white blood cell deficiency which makes him extremely susceptible to diseases. He's actually a really nice guy." Said Andy. "So what about your team? Is Team Jungle alright?"

"It's pretty good; Tabitha's pretty nice and a good leader and Uzuri seems sweet despite being really creepy. Gary's a great cook so we actually have edible food. I don't mind Vinnie; he was a little mean to Fifi but he actually feels really bad for it. Hector however is a bit … big headed." Said Irene as she looked out at the waves. "Still; it's better than having Kasimar on our team."

"Yep; he's a dick." Agreed Andy.

* * *

**Confessional- Tree hugging astronaut.**

**Andy: It feels good to help someone; I'm kind of like that, I have a sort of helping people thing. I just imagine if I was them and I realize that they need help. I hope it's the right thing to do.**

**Irene: Yay! I made a new friend. Andy seems pretty nice; he could be a good ally in this contest. Too bad he's not on my team and thus he can't vote with me. Still … if I try really hard and do well at the challenges I may not need an alliance at all.**

* * *

On the beach a distance from Tabitha and Uzuri were Quana, Eleanor and Lavender. All three were dressed in their swimwear and were sunbathing on the sand. Quana had started speaking to Lavender casually to be polite but soon found she was interesting to speak to.

"I find that the most embarrassing part of being a cheer leader is when the human pyramid falls down; I always fall the most distance as I'm at the top … but I have a soft landing." Said Lavender with a cheery laugh.

"Cheer leading sounds fun." Agreed Quana. "But what if someone tries to look up your skirt?"

"If I caught anyone trying that I wouldn't hesitate to verbally assault them." Replied Lavender. "I … kind of have a temper."

"I've heard a rumor that people with red hair generally have tempers … is this true?" Asked Eleanor.

"I'm not sure; it could be true; there's this guy in my school called Leanne who is the angriest and irritable person you could ever meet. He always says to call him Lee!" Recollected Lavender.

"He doesn't sound too nice; I bet if he were here he'd have been voted off first." Chuckled Quana. "Wait … did you say Leanne? He's a guy!"

"It doesn't help that his middle name is Anne." Smirked Lavender.

"You know girls … it may be a brutal game show full of drama and potential lib loss … but Chris sure did pick a nice Island." Smiled Eleanor. "To bad the challenges are so crazy."

"They're going to get even crazier; I bet Chris would make us high dive off a three mile jump with obstacles on the way down if he could." Sighed Quana. "The fear challenge was pretty brutal."

"If not for Barney I would have probably fainted." Said Lavender.

"Wait … Barney helped you?" Asked Quana.

"I talked with him during his challenge … he seemed to want to thank me." Said Lavender with a big smile.

"Do you like Barney?" Asked Quana teasingly.

"I do not!" Said Lavender indignantly as she crossed her arms.

"You know Quana; you seemed to have a smile on your face after your challenge with Spider; maybe you liiiiiiike him." Chuckled Eleanor.

Quana's tanned cheeks turned a shade of red as she turned away quickly.

"Why does everyone get involved in other peoples business in reality shows?" Sighed Quana.

"For the ratings I guess." Shrugged Eleanor.

"Well; I don't know about you two … but the million dollars waiting for me at the end of all the humiliation, pain, anguish and despair … I think it'll be worth it." Said Lavender hopefully.

* * *

**Confessional- We get loans from the dressing room.**

**Quana: I wonder what I'd do with the million if I got it. Even five hundred thousand would do … maybe I could finance my entrance to the stage, in Hollywood, and maybe I could buy a PS3! I've wanted one for a while. Oh and one more thing … I don't like Spider like **_**that**_**! **(She looks to the side trying to hide a blush). **I admit he's really nice and smart; but I'd rather stay single.**

**Lavender: It felt good to converse with somebody not on my own team for a change. Kasimar is bad for conversation that isn't nasty, Wallace is evil and Raven is shy. Xaria's fairly negative … but I don't mind too much. Oscar and Mable are fine though. I feel that I'm making some good friends; that's how I'll win, strategy and no backstabbing.**

**Eleanor: I'm glad I'm not on team Grenade; I don't care if I'd win so much, Kasimar is kinda scary.** (Eleanor shivers a little).

* * *

A little distance from the girls and sitting on a fairly warm and comfy rock was Spider. He was looking at the three girls, one in particular, and appeared to be deep in thought. As to what he was thinking about? It's rude to invade someone's privacy but it was quite clear if you did the math … or guessing as numbers are not involved.

"_I could look at her all day; but then again that would be considered stalking. I wonder how that whole politically correct thing works._" Thought Spider as he delved into the deep sea of his mind. "_I'm getting off topic. She's so nice to me; she actually gives me a chance. I was never really accepted in my hometown. I wonder if_-"

At that moment Barney jumped down from the tree next to Spider and landed inches away from the sick guy which made Spider jump in surprise.

"Ahoy me friend!" Greeted Barney.

"Where the heck did *cough* you come from?" Asked Spider with his hand to his chest.

"Err … I was in a tree me heartie; but that's not important." Said Barney as he steered the conversation away from why he was in a tree. "While I was in the crows nest I couldn't help but notice you looking at the giiiiiiiirls."

"Doesn't everyone?" Asked Spider as he tried to play innocent; Barney wasn't fooled.

"Don't play squid with me Spider; you were looking at one girl in particular … Quana, right?" whispered Barney with his wild smile not leaving his face.

Spider blushed scarlet in embarrassment while Barney chuckled friendlily.

"That be not a problem be friend!" Smiled Barney as he sat down next to Spider. "If you like I could help get you together. I'm not just a pirate; I'm a love doctor of the sea!"

"I don't know … I heard *cough* Quana mention to Lavender earlier that *sneeze* dating just makes her nervous … and *cough* seriously, why would she want to go with me when *cough* I'm sick as a quarantine … and *cough* I'm not exactly strong or handsome."

"That … will not be a problem cabin boy." Assured Barney as he pointed his fake dagger to the sky. "With me teaching you about love and all assorted details you'll get the girl in no time … and besides; you're no bully so you're already ahead of that dick Kasimar."

Spider sighed and smiled at his genki pirate friend.

"You're one of a kind *cough* Barney; the *cough* Joker's got nothing on you." Smiled Spider as he took out his inhaler and breathed deeply into it.

"So … why Quana?" Asked Barney curiously.

"That's an easy one; she's *cough* really sweet and nice. She gave me a *gag* chance despite my illness. She even stood up for *cough* me when Nakia was discriminating against *sneeze* me. And, well, *cough*, she's … well, let's just say beautiful is an understatement." Said Spider while becoming more red and dreamy looking as he continued speaking. "Wait! Why am I telling *cough* you this?"

"Because I'm a love machine." Grinned Barney as he put his hands to his sides proudly. "Granted I've never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend … but I just know. Now come! I have much to teach you young apprentice!"

Barney let out a 'yo ho' and sped off towards the cabins while Spider got up, took one last look at Quana and followed his friend.

* * *

**Confessional: Love at first sneezy high note.**

**Barney: **(Bouncing up and down in excitement). **It warms me salty sea dog heart that I can help a friend with his emotions; I could probably brew a love potion if I had any skill at alchemy. Yep; helping Spider with love is like helping my maties back home with advanced math … GAH! Edit that out!**

**Spider: Somehow I think this is ***cough*** only going to make a ***cough* **big mess. But it can't hurt to ***sneeze*** try. I hope poems aren't involved; I ***cough* **can't write poems for toffee.**

* * *

Hector and Gary were speaking in the mess hall in quiet voices in the corner. They were talking about their alliance and understandably didn't want anybody knowing about it.

"So; we both voted for Yessica last night right?" Asked Gary.

"Absolutely; you said it would be best so I did." Nodded Hector. "But why Yessica? She would have been useful in water challenges; Irene didn't perform well either. She's pretty nice but we have to be strategic as well as democratic."

"I know; I was actually going to vote for Irene. But I changed by mind." Shrugged Gary.

"Why did you though?" Asked Hector with interest as he started to think. "Something must have made you change your mind."

"Well; I was informed that Yessica had been insulting me behind my back. She insulted my cooking … and … she called me a midget!" Said Gary as he clenched his fists.

"Sorry to hear that." Said Hector as he sipped some water. "Who told you?"

"It was Tabitha." Explained Gary as he began to recollect the previous night's events. "She came in and upon noticing me we conversed. After that she told me what Yessica said. I was pretty angry … I quickly cast my vote."

"I see." Said Hector as he began to think about something.

"Something on your mind buddy?" Asked Gary.

"It's nothing." Said Hector dismissively. "So; with Yessica gone our team is down to six while everyone else has seven. I don't like the way things are going."

"At least with me here we all get decent meals." Put in Gary positively.

"Good point; you really make a stir fry like no other. You're like Gordon Ramsey minus the foul language." Said Hector nicely. "So … is Raven going to keep voting for Wallace?"

"I hope so but I can merely suggest it; Raven has her own free will." Said Gary as he moved his fringe out from over his eye. "And I respect that."

"First comes respect; then comes something more." Smirked Hector.

"Oh shaddup." Said Gary as he rolled his eyes. "I will admit that she is cute, but I'm not here for a relationship. I'm here to cook and win."

Hector just chuckled.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm as good for cooking as a burnt truck tire.**

**Gary: I may be on the currently losing team but I'm sure we can pull ahead … though like everyone I have been wrong before. On our team the biggest threat is actually Tabitha … but she's reliable, kind and a good leader so we shouldn't vote her out. Still … I wonder what Hector was thinking?**

**Hector: You know … I find it odd that Tabitha tells Gary those things and then Yessica is voted out. I voted with Gary … and with me and his votes it's two. Tabitha's makes three … but it's no clear majority. I have a suspicion she talked to other people. I don't trust her.**

* * *

Mable and Xaria were sitting outside the Team Grenade cabin. Mable was reading a healthy eating guidebook while Xaria simply stared into space and appeared to be thinking about something.

"Why is a five a day?" Asked Mable to herself. "Wouldn't it be better with six?"

"I can answer that … vegetables are boring and in some cases completely vile … like sweet corn." Said Xaria promptly. "I much prefer noodles."

"Well I don't mind noodles either. But vegetables are important to your diet; if you only ate fatty foods and fizzy drinks then you'd end up like Homer when he tried to become obese." Explained Mable with a shudder. "It's why I rarely have candy."

"Not even a mars bar?" Asked Xaria with a raised eyebrow.

"No; it would take a run from England to France and back to burn off all the calories." Said Mable as she turned a page in her book. "I think a fruit salad is pretty much like nature's candy."

"Nature; what's so good about it? It's going to be gone soon anyway so why enjoy what you'll eventually not be able to have?" Grumbled Xaria as she crossed her arms.

"Were you always this, well, grumpy?" Asked Mable.

"What does it matter? Everyone has faults; grumpiness is mine." Shrugged Xaria.

"True … but remember that happiness is a smile away." Said Mable as she got up and walked away towards the beach.

Xaria sighed as he looked up at the sky; it was clear blue and seemed pretty cloudless. A few birds flew past tweeting.

"Stupid birds; could they be anymore tuneless?" Grumbled Xaria.

At that moment Jimmy walked by. He noticed Xaria looked fairly negative and after a moment of thought decided to cheer her up.

"Hi Xaria." Said Jimmy as he walked up to the grumpy girl. "Lovely day isn't it?"

"I suppose; but it'll probably rain very soon." Said Xaria as she crossed her arms.

"Well … would you like to hear a joke?" Asked Jimmy.

"I'd rather not." Said Xaria flatly.

"How about I do an impersonation." Suggested Jimmy.

"…No." Said Xaria.

"Do you need a hug?" Asked Jimmy with concern. "Hugs cheer me up when I'm sad."

"I appreciate that you're actually concerned for me … but this is who I am, a grumpy cynical girl." Said Xaria with a sigh. "Besides; I'm on another team, why be nice to me?"

"Just because we're on Different teams there is no reason we can't get along. In World War one on Christmas the English Team and German Team stopped the fighting and played football." Explained Jimmy with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional- We're in the reserves!**

**Jimmy: I do know a bit about war; I really don't like it, but I know. My Grandpa was a soldier. You should here some of the stories he tells me and my friends when we visit him.**

* * *

Xaria looked impressed for a moment but shook her head and sighed.

"Thanks for being nice Jimmy; but don't worry about it, I'm fine." Said Xaria. "All I need is the prize money; that way I can get my own house somewhere away from my hometown."

"I don't really care about the prize." Shrugged Jimmy with a smile. "I'm here to make friends and have fun. If I do win though I'll split it five ways with Ted, Ricky, Pablo and Charles, my friends from back home. After that I could buy the candy store."

"…The world could use more people like you Jimmy." Said Xaria with the faintest hint of a smile.

* * *

**Confessional- A good hat on a good head on his shoulders.**

**Xaria: I may be pretty much a social outcast grump … but Jimmy can make anybody smile. He's one of the people I don't mind being around … though he shouldn't try and cheer me up. This is who I am.**

**Jimmy: Xaria's cool; she has a sort of calm and collected attitude and her hair streaks are a real stand out from the crowd. I don't rally fit in with the crowd … but who cares, right?**

* * *

Wallace and Kasimar were hanging out a short distance from camp in the forest. Wallace was writing in his note book very quickly and Kasimar was practicing his punches on a tree; the punches were splintering and snapping the bark of the tree.

"Mwuhahaha! I'm in a particularly evil mood today my right hand man! And what better way to commit evil than to cheat?"

"I know a way; telling dead baby jokes to someone who just lost there's." Said Kasimar with a snigger as he continually punched the tree.

"That is pretty brutal; even by my standards." Said Wallace with wide eyed behind his sunglasses. "I think today our target should be Team Jungle."

"Any reason why? I want to hurt those little kids sometime. I have needs you know!" Said Kasimar as he ripped some bark of the tree and snapped it.

"Well; Tabitha is the reason. I don't care how nice she may be, I've been evil long enough to have skill at recognizing it … and Tabitha is Lawful Evil if ever I saw it." Explained Wallace while waving his arms for effect. "We must take her out before she becomes a problem."

"What's so bad about her? She's on another team … and besides; aren't villains supposed to get along?"

"Haven't you ever read a cross over comic or played a cross over video game? Bad guys never get along. They keep betraying each other. And not only that; but Tabitha isn't obviously evil like us, she can easily make allies and when the merge comes she will vote off the threats … and who is a bigger threat than us?" Explained Wallace as he grew increasingly more hysterical with each word.

"So what's the plan? How about we just break someone's bones and get them shipped off then island in a body bag?" Suggested Kasimar.

"Good idea … but that's cliché, and God knows that's not what we're aiming for." Said Wallace. "I have a number of schemes for every possible type of challenge; if it's hunting we modify the gun to fire rockets, if it's finding something we wear X-ray goggles … and if it's a water challenge, any guesses?"

"We drill a hole in someone else's boat." Guessed Kasimar.

"That's cliché; something we must avoid. I think we could … 'turn the tide in our favor'; get it? Mwahahahaha!"

Kasimar audibly groaned at the awful joke and went back to punching the tree.

"Fine; but I want to hurt someone soon. Trees are ok for now but they don't scream and cry."

* * *

**Confessional- Evil laughter! Evil Laughter!**

**Wallace: The thing that makes me a good villain is that I don't over think things. Not only that but I don't trust many others to do my bidding. If you put your vision in the hands of someone even barely incompetent then that vision becomes diluted. But with my intelligence and Kasimar's lack of morals we'll be unbeatable!**

**Kasimar: I'm not sure how much longer I want to hang out with Wallace. He's a complete maniac, and not in a good way. Wallace is like Dick Dastardly meets Barney the Dinosaur. Still; he's helping me escape elimination so far … but I don't do friendship. Friends is just another word for becoming a wuss.**

* * *

Oscar lifted his large barbell above his head; even though he was away from the gym he had to keep working out or he'd lose his strength. His muscles were what made him useful as team mate. If he lost them he would basically lose the game.

"Eighty seven, eighty eight, eighty nine." Said Oscar as he lifted the barbell up over his head a number of times.

"Wow; you're really strong." Said Zita as she walked by.

"It comes from years of working out; I'm hoping to represent Canada in weight lifting in the Olympics." Explained Oscar as he continued lifting the Barbell up and down. "Wait; aren't you that girl who steals a lot?"

"Pretty much." Shrugged Zita. "I just have sticky fingers ok."

"Don't worry; I don't mind … so long as you don't steal my weight set." Cautioned Oscar before thinking. "Then again it is kind of hard to lift the whole lot at once so I probably shouldn't worry. Even I have trouble with all of them at once."

"Do you like anything other than muscles and working out?" Asked Zita.

"Sure; I like steak, anime, making friends and… well; a certain series of movie." Said Oscar as he trailed off.

"What series?" Asked Zita with a smile.

"That's neither here nor there." Replied Oscar.

"You're right; it's here, there and everywhere! Yehehehehe!" Laughed Zita.

"Oh Ha, HA." Laughed Oscar sarcastically. "Why talk to me anyway, aren't we on opposing teams?"

"True … but I'm scouting out the competition and I've learned a bit about you." Said Zita with a smirk.

"Well my hobbies won't really affect my performance … but whatever cracks your egg I guess." Shrugged Oscar.

"What?" Asked Zita in confusion.

"I sometimes make up new phrases to avoid sounding cliché." Explained Oscar as he continued lifting the barbell.

"Ok; well, I'll see you later … oh, and prepare to lose to team puzzle." Said Zita as she left.

"Don't count on it!" Called Oscar with a smirk.

* * *

**Confessional: I can count to sixty nine!**

**Oscar: Don't be thinking I'm saying what movie I meant; my lips are sealed. And don't judge me for liking anime, Pokémon is funny! 'Team rocket's blasting off again'; classic.**

**Zita: Oscar doesn't seem to have any valuables; I guess I can count him out of my heist plans. But he seems like a pretty solid guy. I wonder who has the best valuables though. I know I shouldn't … but I've got the urge and only possessions can make it go away.**

* * *

The camp's intercom crackled into life and Chris's voice boomed out of it and could be heard all over the area.

"Attention campers; it is now day six and that means you are one and a half sevenths done with the contest. Today's challenge will take you all around the island and maybe to your watery graves!" Said Chris sadistically.

The sound of Chris's mean sadistic laughter rang throughout the area. Some campers gulped while some (Kasimar) made a rude hand gesture to the intercom.

"Well; we can't let you die because of lawsuits." Sighed Chris's voice in disappointment. "But it doesn't say anything about you killing each other. In basic conclusion meet me by the bridge over the river to the east of camp. That is all."

Chris stopped speaking but the sounds didn't stop. A weird groaning and some squishy sounds started being emitted.

"Oh yeah; digging for gold, maybe I'll get a solid green nugget." Said Chris as he picked his nose.

Every camper on the Island heard what Chris was doing and either gagged is disgust or laughed at Chris's stupidity.

"Wait … is this still on? Oh sh-!" Said Chris as he turned the intercom off very quickly.

"Well; I guess we can deem Chris as a gold digger." Said Andy while fighting back laughter.

* * *

**Confessional- I don't have a nose to pick.**

**Barney: Yohohohohoho! He actually picked his nose over the intercom. What peg legged stupidity!**

**Uzuri: Teehee! That was funny; almost as funny as when Hopper got eaten by that bird!**

**Jimmy: Heheehee! I've seen some funny things in my long ten years … but that was hilarious!**

**Irene: Yalalalalala! It may be a low form of humor but it never gets old!**

**Andy: Yebehbehbeh! There are some things that are funny no matter what the situation. The best part is Chris has to announce the challenge now so he can't edit out the footage. … Hmm; you know, I've noticed that many of us have a unique laugh; I wonder if anyone has laughter weirder than mine?**

**Kasimar: Nose picking isn't funny … at all! Only handicapped people and wimps find it funny. You know what's really funny? Dead baby jokes! Yahahahaha!**

**Tabitha: I bet most other people found that funny; not me. The nose is for smelling, not for picking. It is the lowest form of humor along with that of the toilet variety. If people here are *that* easily amused then I've got nothing to worry about.**

**Chris: Well; I may have not been able to get rid of the footage but thankfully I fired the person who gave me the intercom so therefore it doesn't count! Haha! **(Chris crosses his arms and grins smugly).

* * *

A short while after the intercom fiasco Chris stood before the twenty campers trying not to look embarrassed over what had happened. They were standing on a bridge over the rushing river water below; the banks went downwards for about eight feet so there was a lower floor to the bridge so the boats could be boarded easily.

"Welcome to your sixth challenge everyone; today we are going to get into the camping spirit in a traditional but dangerous way. It sucks that Team Jungle voted off Yessica as today's challenge is water related!"

Team Jungle, particularly Tabitha, looked stunned.

"Yep; sucks to be you guys eh? And with the added weight of Hector you'll probably sink!"

"Oh; go and drink corrosive acid Chris." Said Hector with a frown.

* * *

**Confessional: I can't drink as I have no mouth.**

**Hector: Chris is quite possibly the nastiest piece of work it has ever been my displeasure to meet. I'm glad he isn't a contestant.**

**Tabitha: **(Very pissed off). **Is Chris actually trying to rig this against me? He's supposed to like the bad people! He's even worse than that dick Kasimar!**

* * *

Chris laughed merrily for a short while before he returned to his explanation.

"Today you will be having a boat race around Wawanakwa; your boats are the same color as that which represents your team. Look out for obstacles along the way; sometimes somebody might have to exit the boat so the path can be cleared. The first team to cross the line will win a special prize. The second place team gets nothing but avoids elimination. The unlucky saps that come last vote someone off. Now everyone get into a boat and let's get this race started!"

As this was a challenge involving boats Barney was typically excited. He slung his arm around Spider as he smiled his genki grin.

"This is it Spider me first mate; today we're going to win in the name of all that is pirate. I shall let the port from the starboard and prove my … err … piracy!"

"Excited are you?" Asked Quana knowingly.

"Why wouldn't I be yaaar? It might not be the open sea but knowing Chris there will be a treasure trove of traps to separate the captains from the cabin boys." Said Barney as he tightened his hold on Spider.

"Can't *cough* breath." Said Spider with a gasp for air.

Barney quickly released him and as the other five entered the boat Barney spoke to Barney like a professor would to a student.

"Ok Spider; your first love lesson is quite easy; sea lassies love it when you complement their cloths. Just say you like her outfit in a subtle way and ask her where she got it. Then let your ears do the work for you, and shaboom! You've bonded a little!"

"Are you sure *gag* this is a good idea Barney?" Asked Spider uncertainly.

"Would a pirate tell a lie? Oh; and whatever you do, don't ask about her panties or what's under the cloths yaaar!"

Barney merrily jumped off the bridge into the boat while Spider turned bright red in embarrassment; he took out his inhaler and breathed deeply as he made his way to the boat. He hoped Barney knew what he was talking about.

* * *

**Confessional: A singer and a sick guy? Sure, why not?**

**Spider: Barney means well … but ***cough*** I still have my doubts. This** *sneeze*** could very well do more harm than ***hard cough*** good. Still; what have I got to** *cough*** lose?**

**Barney: I think this will be the perfect opportunity to introduce my team to the joy … of sea shanties!**

* * *

Vinnie was in the Team Jungle boat; theirs was a little less cramped than the other boats as they had six people rather than seven. For this Challenge Vinnie had replaced his metal arm's pincers with a hand. That way he could use the oars if he was told to. As he sat in the middle of the boat Uzuri sat down next to him and smiled.

"Hi Vinnie; looks like we're going on the open waters of the river! I hope we won't get eaten my piranha's."

"I don't think this Island has piranha's … but I could be wrong. Still; it's not really the type of water I'd like to swim in." Said Vinnie as he looked into the water uncertainly. "I think it's a good thing that the boats are secured to the bridge because considering the speed of the water it would be hard to get in."

"Oh I know; it would be as hard as the time I tried to become a hunter." Said Uzuri as she smiled at the memory and began to speak sinisterly. "I never quite caught that thee horned deer … but one day, he'll be *mine*. Teehee!"

Vinnie was silent; Uzuri was a little … odd; but she seemed to be really nice so he gave her the benefit of the doubt and listened anyway.

"So; why are you sitting next to me?" Asked Vinnie. "Why don't you sit with Tabitha? You're always hanging out."

"Girls are fun to talk with; but I like boys too!" Chirped Uzuri cheerfully. "You seem interesting; I really like your metal arm, you could win any arm wrestle in the world!"

"Thanks; for today I took off the pincers and put the hand on. It'll make me more useful."

"I thought you said you couldn't handle a shovel for your life the other day." Said Uzuri. "How is an oar different?"

"What I meant was that I suck at garden work. I sometimes say the wrong thing and end up regretting it." Said Vinnie as he inwardly sighed.

"Well make sure you apologize!" Smiled Uzuri. "Apologies make everything better."

Before Vinnie could respond Tabitha got into the boat at the front and addressed everyone.

"Ok team; are we ready to finally come first?"

"We are!" Cheered Uzuri.

"Are we going to let the other teams beat us?"

"No way!" Said Gary.

"And why?"

"Because we're Team Jungle!" Yelled Irene happily.

* * *

**Confessional- I'm not on a team; I have no limbs!**

**Tabitha: You just need the right words to motivate your team. With their spirits high they should work hard. I hope the first place gift is something as great as me. Maybe a ruby the size of Oscar's fist.**

**Irene: I feel so pumped up! Tabitha's right; we're team jungle, we're wild! And today could be the beginning of a winning streak; and if we go along the river we'll see all kinds of plants. Ooooooh! I'm so excited!**

* * *

Team Grenade were all in there boat. Oscar was at the oars and the others were sitting around. At the back of the boat was Wallace. He was holding a silver bomb with a red button on it. Kasimar was sitting next to him and noticed it.

"What's that?" Whispered Kasimar with interest. "Could it kill someone?"

"No it can't … but you'll see it in action at the right time. It's something to look forward to." Grinned Wallace as he slipped the bomb into a pocket on his jacket.

At the front of the boat Lavender sat next to Raven. Raven looked over the side into the fast moving water.

"Is this water safe?" Asked Raven in concern.

"I doubt it knowing Chris; he didn't even give us life jackets! But if anyone falls out we'll pull them back in instantly … unless it's Wallace or Kasimar. No one likes them."

"I sure don't." Agreed Raven with a nod.

"Well they'll get their karma eventually." Said Lavender confidently. "Still; you're ok with being on a boat aren't you?"

"Yes; I d-don't mind it too m-much." Said Raven as she continued gazing into the water. "Whatever floats your b-boat right?"

Lavender laughed and smiled.

"It's good to see you're coming out of you're shell Raven; seriously, you are very fun to be around."

"Thank you." Said Raven.

Chris walked to the center of the bridge above the boats with a starter gun.

"Ok everyone; get ready to race. I don't expect you all to make it back … but if you die try to make it amusing. Ok; three, two, one … Go!"

Chris fired the gun as the interns unsecured the boats. The three teams headed down the large river with Oscar propelling Team Grenade into the lead with the other two trailing.

"So the race has started; this leaves us with some questions. Will anyone die? What advice will Barney give spider? And will my pet rock ever speak. Find out after the break on Total Drama Letterz!"


	13. Day 6, Part 2, Ship Ahoy Captain

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the season that must never be named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme, that belongs to Frank15. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please, do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This story contains bombs, a pirate, a tentacle, a sadistic worse-by-the-episode host and other such stuff. Nothing m rated though.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender GaryxRaven AndyxMable JimmyxEleanor and VinniexUzuri plus a secret pairing.

**Note: **I've been working on this ALL DAY. I hope you all enjoy it!

Three, two, one … we have lift off!

* * *

"And welcome back to Total Drama Letterz!" Said Chris as the camera began rolling again. "The challenge has just started; it's a boat race around Wawanakwa! With traps, obstacles and a few other surprises it's sure to be exciting."

Chris looked at the boats disappearing into the distance and going further into the Island's river.

"I can smell great ratings; Barney has taken Spider under his piratey wings to teach him the ways of girls and love. Of course; whatever he could do I could do over nine thousand times better! Still; I don't want to help a sick kid, sick people have no souls. But for now … on with the challenge!"

As the camera cut from Chris the sadistic pretty boy pulled out a Latte and began to drink it.

"That's the good stuff." Said Chris between slurps.

* * *

**Confessional- How come I don't get a latté?**

**Chris: I always thought drowning would be fun to watch … maybe I'll see if that's true today. Haha!**

* * *

The three boats were rowing down the river a distance apart from each other. Team Grenade was in the lead as they had Oscar rowing and Oscar's arms were extremely strong … and also he had gone rowing before. Team Puzzle was in second; Andy was rowing the boat, he may not have been exceptionably strong but he could accomplish a lot when determined. Team Jungle was in last; Hector was rowing though not as fast as the others. But as the race had just begun it was anyone's game.

"I think we've got a good chance here everyone." Said Oscar confidently as he rowed. "As long as we keep up our superior speed we'll pull right ahead before long."

"Just don't get too overconfident." Cautioned Mable.

"Why worry; it's not like anyone on the other teams is a threat." Sneered Kasimar. "Team Puzzle will probably lose, all they've got is two weak kids, a sick loser, a space obsessed moron, an ugly as sin girl, a crazy pirate … and a girl I wouldn't mind being 'alone with'."

Lavender smacked Kasimar around the head.

"Pervert!" Growled Lavender. "Don't insult my friends you asswipe!"

"Shut up ginger; you have no soul so I don't have to listen to you." Laughed Kasimar snidely.

Lavender growled and clenched her fists as she turned red in anger. It looked like a fight was inevitable.

* * *

**Confessional- I have no hair.**

**Lavender: **(Seething angry). **Kasimar is vile and horrid! He insults everyone and has no good side; he's like the devil in human form only worse! I actually prefer Wallace over him and he's a nut job as well. The only sane guy on the Team is Oscar; I feel bad for him since he has to bunk with those two imbeciles.**

**Kasimar: So; am I going to use my strength and intimidation to hurt people, cheat, lie, make people cry, break bones and scare the children … duh!**

* * *

"Let me at him!" Yelled Lavender as she attempted to lunge for Kasimar while Mable and Xaria held her back.

"Don't stop me." Growled Lavender as she snarled at Kasimar. "And why save him from a pummeling?"

"It's not that we like that prick in any way." Said Xaria as she held Lavenders right arm. "It's that if you start murdering him you'll overturn the boat."

"And we want to keep this winning streak going." Finished Mable as she held Lavender's left arm.

Lavender breathed deeply and sat back down by Mable. She calmed herself but shot a look at Kasimar.

"Next time we lose you're outta here." Promised Lavender as she glared with her piercing red eyes.

"Too right." Agreed Raven quietly; she didn't speak too loud as she was a little scared of Kasimar.

"Say what you want girls; but I can't be beaten, I'm big and you're small and you can't do a thing about it!" Sneered Kasimar in a vile tone.

Everyone besides Wallace glared at Kasimar hatefully.

* * *

**Confessional- Even I hate that dick.**

**Xaria: And I thought my sister Jaron was nasty … Kasimar is pure evil. He's got my vote if we lose. I may be a negative grumpy girl but I know whose side I'm on here and it isn't Kasimar's.**

**Raven: I think after Claustrophobia … my greatest fear is Kasimar.**

**Wallace: It does me proud that I can teach my right hand man the ways of evil. He's already very accomplished but he still has some tricks of the trade to learn … I think the battle between me and him in the final two shall be legendary!**

* * *

Team Jungle saw Team Grenade pulling ahead and around a corner; the path ahead was split into two ways. Tabitha wondered which to take.

"Does anyone have a suggestion which way we should go? Left or right?" Asked Tabitha.

"Most people are right handed so how about we go right?" Suggested Hector.

"But Chris may have put more traps that way in hopes that somebody would choose right and then get messed up." Said Irene. "Maybe we should go left."

Uzuri thought for a moment and snapped her fingers.

"I've got it! Let's go the opposite way Team Grenade has gone; that way if Wallace cheats we won't suffer the consequences!" Said Uzuri as she pointed to the left.

"Good idea Uzuri; I like your thinking." Smiled Vinnie. Uzuri just smiled modestly.

"Ok then; down the left we go." Said Tabitha as Hector steered them down their decided path.

"If we come to an obstacle that requires one of us to get out of the boat who shall we send out?" Asked Irene after a moment of silence.

"How about me?" Said Gary. "I'm a fast runner and I can throw quite a punch."

"I can believe you are fast." Said Tabitha with an inward invisible sneer. "But you don't really look too strong."

"Don't judge a book by its cover; just because I'm a Chef doesn't mean I can't defend myself. One of my hobbies is boxing." Explained Gary honestly.

Tabitha didn't believe Gary at all but decided to pretend she did.

"If you say so Gary; now while we're out here how about we just relax and mingle."

"Ooo! I know how!" Piped up Uzuri. "How about a game of eye spy!"

"That's kind of childish." Said Tabitha. "And we're all teens here."

"But people mistake me for a twelve or thirteen year old." Replied Uzuri. "So it's justified. Now … I spy with my little eye something that could peck your soul in hell!"

Everyone was silent for a moment, mostly in shock.

"Err … a bird?" Guessed Hector.

"Correct! See; isn't this game fun?" Smiled Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional- I spy with my non existent eyes!**

**Hector: Ok … that was a little creepy. But then again Uzuri's label IS 'the Sweet Sadist' so I guess I should expect it. I'm more concerned about Tabitha, I'm sure there is more to her than meets the eye. I'll stay silent just for now … but I'm not easily manipulated at all.**

**Gary: **(He has wide eyes). **A bird pecking your soul in hell … that sounds agonizing. Uzuri's fun and all but that sort of talk is a little cringe inducing. But I don't really mind her, to be honest I don't think Uzuri has a mean bone is her body. I can see beyond her, well, 'quirks' and I think she's pretty nice.**

**Uzuri: I'm so lucky to be on a Team with such nice people; back at home … I don't really have many friends. **(Uzuri sighs a little). **But I really fit in here!**

* * *

Team Puzzle were rowing down the same path as Team Grenade though the explosive Team had pulled a distance ahead of them. Barney was at the front of the boat and looked ahead like a lookout in the crows nest.

"Yaaar! It be a lovely day on the open river water." Said Barney happily. "But it would be even better on the open sea with cannon fire and swash buckling sword fights all around! Yo ho!"

"Be careful you don't fall out of the boat Barney." Warned Eleanor. "You may be a good swimmer but I don't think the wildlife in Wawanakwa's waters is too friendly. You may not be able to drive off the sharks this time."

"Oh don't worry Eleanor me mermaid; I have a great sense of balance; ask Andy about the first challenge."

"Should i?" Asked Eleanor cautiously.

"Basically the first obstacle we came to was a row of unstable pillars … Barney just sped through them without wobbling. Meanwhile I fell into the water. It was as cold as the vacuum of space!" Said Andy as he remembered his accident in the first challenge. "But it wasn't too bad as we were the first two to finish the challenge."

"That labyrinth was pretty exhausting." Agreed Quana. "Me and Spider got chased by a boulder; if Nakia had listened to Spider it wouldn't have been sprung at all!"

Spider nodded from next to Quana; Nakia wasn't a nice girl. And she had sworn revenge. The others had told him not to worry … but what if she followed up on it? If he got voted off and went to Playa Des Losers then he would stay in his room, lock the door and hide from Nakia. She was kind of scary when angry.

Spider shook his head and looked at the water.

"_Why should I worry? Other than the fact she wants to kill me of course. But I'm here and she's gone. And I have the others to protect me._" Thought Spider in hope.

Jimmy looked quite cheerful as he sat in the boat. Eleanor noticed this and smiled.

"Do you like boats Jimmy?" She asked.

"Yep. It reminds me of the time me and my friends go on rides in Pablo's yacht." Smiled Jimmy.

"Wait; your friend has a yacht?" Asked Eleanor in amazement.

"Well; his family is kind of rich." Explained Jimmy. "Unlike most rich boys he is actually a very good friend, my best friend even."

"Your friends sound very nice." Smiled Eleanor. "Do they like animals?"

"We all do." Nodded Jimmy. "I'm particularly fond of Red Panda's."

While the two kids conversed Zita looked at each of her team mates while thinking.

"_They are my friends … but I can't help it. I'm a hoarder; I need to have lots of stuff._" Thought Zita deeply. "_I know stealing from them would be bad and I could get voted off … but if I don't I might get stressed and jittery. I haven't stolen anything in days! But who to choose_?"

Zita looked at her team mates; she had to choose someone but also someone who wouldn't get violent. Zita sighed; she had quite a conflicted conscience.

* * *

**Confessional- Don't steal from me!**

**Zita: I can't help it; I have a severe form of obsessive compulsion disorder, if I don't steal then I feel really uncomfortable. I want to change … but I can't. It's just who I am, I'm stereotyped 'The Thief' for a reason. Stealing also gives me an exciting adrenalin rush, more so than a fight.**

**Andy: Spending time with friends in this summer camp game show is like last year at Space Camp. I really fit in there, so many space fans just like myself. Speaking of space, why is it aliens are stereotypical green? For all we know they could be cyan.**

* * *

Team Grenade, thanks to Oscar's expert rowing, had started to get a lead. As they rowed through the gradually relaxing water they could see something coming up.

"What's that?" Asked Oscar. "Because I'm sure it's not a natural part of the river."

"I think it's our first obstacle." Said Mable. "I hope it won't be a torpedo launcher."

"I doubt even Chris is that crazy." Assured Lavender.

"Don't jinx it." Warned Xaria. "If you doubt something with confidence then it tempts fate and thus is more likely to happen. I know from the amount of times I've thought things can't get worse … and they did."

"Maybe I'll say the forbidden words to be evil! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed the button on his remote. Instantly the organ theme music began to play for a few seconds.

"Ok seriously; where does that music keep coming from?" Asked Lavender as she looked around. "That's not possible!"

"I'd tell you … but then I'd have to kill you." Grinned Wallace.

Lavender wasn't sure if Wallace was being serious or not but decided not to ask. Oscar pulled the boat up to a platform at the side of the river. They could clearly see what it was now.

In front of them was a large gate. The water flowed through the gaps as it was like a rail gate. Near the platform were some steps and at the top was a crank that presumably had to be turned to open it. Mable quickly stepped up.

"Just sit tight everyone I've got this." Said Mable as she quickly climbed out of the boat.

"Well don't go slow." Grunted Kasimar. "We actually want to win ya granola freak!"

Mable growled as she ran up the steps towards the crank. Mable began spinning it as fast as she could; it was fairly stiff; Chris may have tightened it on purpose so it would be harder to operate. After a few seconds of struggling the stiffness vanished and it span like a greased wheel. Soon the gate opened all the way.

"Alright! I did it!" Cheered Mable.

"Thanks for clearing our path!" Called Barney as the Team Puzzle boat passed Mable and her Team.

"Hurry Mable!" Called Oscar. "We can't let them beat us!"

Mable shot like a bullet back into her Team's boat as Oscar began rowing as hard as he could.

"Barney; they're catching up." Said Jimmy as he looked at Kasimar uneasily.

"Don't worry Jimmy, I'll save the day … oh, and call me … Captain Barney." Said Barney as he grinned genkily and pulled out his fake dagger.

The Team grenade boat pulled up next to the Team puzzle boat as the two vessels of seven began to move at an equal speed.

"Ahoy ye scurvy sea dogs!" Called Barney. "We're going to batten down your hatches, rip your sails and make you scrub the deck! Yo ho!"

Lavender quickly got to the front of the boat and stood to face Barney.

"Bring it on Pirate boy; let's get it on!"

* * *

**Confessional- A showdown of Genki and Red.**

**Barney: Arrrrr! This is gonna be the most exciting battle on the water since Blackbeard was defeated! Underestimate me once, shame on you … underestimate me twice, shame on you all! Yo ho!**

**Lavender: Barney may have helped me last challenge, but as the saying goes 'all loyalties are forgotten during a race', if he wants a duel I'll GIVE him a duel!**

**Andy: Well … this ought to be amusing; bring out the popcorn people! **

* * *

Barney and Lavender stared each other down as Andy and Oscar continued rowing. An epic showdown was inevitable and seemed ready to begin at any minute.

"Take this mermaid!" Called Barney as he poked his fake dagger towards Lavender; she leaned backwards and it missed but Barney didn't lose his balance at all.

"Well how about I introduce my merry old sole!" Grinned Lavender as she kicked the Team Puzzle boat … hard.

The force of Lavender's strong and hard kick made the boat shake and Jimmy fell over.

"Are you ok?" Asked Quana in concern.

"Don't worry; I'm fine." Smiled Jimmy. "Oooo! This is so exciting! Even more than that time back home when we were lost in that haunted house!"

Jimmy said no more on the matter so Quana asked no more questions.

Andy was rowing as best as he could though it was hard to go at the same rate as a muscle man like Oscar. Andy had never been too strong physically so it was harder for him to keep up. But he was trying so hard.

"I can't keep up this rowing forever!" Panted Andy while his arms felt sore.

"You can do it me heartie!" Called Barney a he dodged a swipe from Lavender and promptly stomped the edge of the Team Grenade boat. The explosive team was knocked about and Lavender fell backwards onto the bottom on the boat. All this made Oscar stop rowing for a moment which allowed Andy to pull ahead.

"See you at the finish line!" Called Zita.

"You were a worthy foe Lavender!" Called Barney as he struck a victory pose.

"Get down! We're entering a tunnel." Said Eleanor as Andy steered them left into a tunnel. Barney sat back down as Team Puzzle escaped into the lead.

* * *

**Confessional- And the pirate is the winner; who saw that coming?**

**Barney: Call me what you like but when it comes to duels on the water I'm second to none. Not even an attractive cheer leader can beat me! **(Barney suddenly realizes what he just said and lets out an 'eep'). **I didn't mean that yaaar! Edit it out!**

**Raven: Barney is very interesting … but at t-the same time he's a l-little nuts. In a good w-way though.**

**Quana: Barney just keeps surprising us all. If he makes it to the merge he could easily win with unlimited energy like that.**

* * *

Team Jungle was rowing along at a leisurely pace without too many difficulties. Since they had decided to go a different route than the other teams they wouldn't get bumped or potentially overturned by any of Wallace's cheating tactics.

Tabitha thought things were going quite well; it was quiet so she could think, everyone was getting along, no traps were in sight … and of course, she could plot her next move.

But one thing stopping her from focusing was Uzuri; she was still playing the 'I spy' game. Some of the things she was spying and saying were quite borderline psychotic.

"I spy with my little eye; something that gives you a rash complete with a suicidal urge!" Giggled Uzuri.

"Err … poison ivy?" Guessed Irene blankly.

"Correct you are." Smiled Uzuri. "Let's play again!"

"How about we don't?" Said Tabitha with difficulty fully masking her frustration. "Let's just focus on keeping a good speed up and avoiding traps."

* * *

**Confessional- We know when you fart.**

**Tabitha: Uzuri deserves to be locked an asylum. But she is useful and I have patience. Unlike a lot of people I don't get angry over every little thing … just the really big things.**

* * *

"So … what do we do now?" Asked Uzuri as she looked up at the clouds.

"How about we talk about our favorite video games?" Suggested Vinnie. "To me there is no game greater than the Mario series, Paper Mario is awesome!"

"I must make a correction." Interjected Hector. "Mario isn't the best … Sonic is."

"Well you two are both wrong." Grinned Gary from his seat. "Spyro the Dragon is the best … or at least the original Trilogy is."

"Ripto was a good villain." Agreed Vinnie. "But Mario can turn into a statue in some games."

"I hate to interject." Said Irene. "But I think I can see something up ahead."

The team looked where Irene was pointing and all gulped. Up ahead of them was a waterfall and as Heather and LeShawna could tell you … it was a big drop.

"Oh crap!" Gulped Gary as he looked ahead at the danger that was gradually getting closer. "Does anybody have any bright ideas?"

"Looks like we're heading for a tumble!" Giggled Uzuri in excitement.

"You think that's a good thing?" Blinked Hector. "We could die!"

"It'll be like a roller coaster!" Cheered Uzuri. "Now hang on tight everyone!"

The boat was almost at the edge of the waterfall; Irene looked scared, so did Gary and Hector. Vinnie felt scared but if Uzuri was excited then maybe it would be fun. Tabitha sighed to herself.

"This is going to ruin my shoes." Sighed Tabitha as the boat went over the edge.

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!" Cheered Uzuri in joy.

"Eeeeeeeeeeeek!" Screamed Irene.

The boat hit the water with a satisfying splash as the members of Team Jungle all got soaked.

* * *

**Confessional- I'm waterproof!**

**Tabitha: **(She is dripping wet). **I am a cat person; I share with them a dislike of getting really wet … especially while I'm in my normal cloths! Now I know how my cat Shadow feels when she's in the rain.**

**Gary:** (He is soaking).** How anyone could consider that fun is beyond me. I don't really like roller coasters too much and that felt like one. But it's over now … hopefully there won't be anymore nasty surprises.**

**Uzuri:** (She is wet and her blond hair is messed up but she still looks happy). **I love getting wet! I'm no swimmer but every week or two I go to the local swimming pool back home. That was as much fun as watching SAW in the dark!**

* * *

Lavender sat silently in the Team Grenade boat. Somehow Barney had beaten her in a duel and he and his team had gotten ahead. She felt quite frustrated; not because Barney had beaten her … but because Kasimar was really rubbing it in.

"It's to be expected really." Said Kasimar smugly. "A ginger couldn't possibly succeed … well, they can suck seed like a bird but they'll never win! Yahahahaha!"

Lavender was trying to keep calm but Kasimar was making it quite difficult. She almost wished she was on another Team; even if she wouldn't win as much she would still be away from Kasimar.

"Shut up Kasimar." Growled Xaria. "You're just a coward!"

Kasimar started to breath heavily and he snarled.

"Don't. Call. Me. A. Coward!" Yelled Kasimar.

"That's. Not. Speaking. Normally." Replied Xaria snappily. "If you really want to fight someone why not Oscar, he's strong enough to provide a challenge to someone as 'unbeatable' as yourself."

"Thanks Xaria." Smiled Oscar as he rowed speedily.

"No problem; it's clear you're stronger than this dick, both physically and morally." Shrugged Xaria. "I would pay to see a one on one fight between you and Kasimar."

"That can be arranged." Smirked Kasimar. "This steroid baron doesn't stand a chance against me."

Oscar whacked Kasimar on the head with an oar and the bully was promptly knocked out.

"Let's keep things simple eh?" Said Oscar with a chuckle.

"What if he gets a c-concussion?" Asked Raven.

"Who the hell cares?" Replied Xaria.

"Yeah … but doing that to Kasimar, while fulfilling, it would make us as bad as him." Said Mable. "I think next time we lose he's gonna be outta here."

"You'd think that, you'd think that." Chuckled Wallace.

"What do you mean 'Mr. Bad guy'?" Asked Lavender.

"Don't you see? He's perhaps the nastiest and most vile person here. It's obvious he is going to get far, you remember Heather right?" explained Wallace. "And you never know; a villain might win this year! Like me! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!"

"You've certainly got the evil laugh." Said Oscar. "Maybe when you're gone I can get a good night's sleep."

* * *

**Confessional- Sleepless in Seattle.**

**Oscar: I could do with a good rest but it's hard to sleep in the same room as those two. Wallace laughs in his sleep and Kasimar just talks about some seriously taboo stuff.**

* * *

"Tell yourself whatever you want." Shrugged Wallace. "Evil villains are harder to crush than cockroaches."

"Any reason why you're so o-obsessed with being e-evil?" Asked Raven.

"Easy; being good is for losers. Evil is so much fun! It did take me a while to perfect my evil laughter though. Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace while the others covered their ears.

"You know; we should vote for you because of the pit trap business!" Snapped Lavender.

"Oh please; it's not like I was going to leave her there forever." Said Wallace in a voice that sounded like pointless evil. "I like to give my victims a chance to get even with me."

"And what exactly would you do that; she asked not expecting a sane response." Asked Xaria dryly.

"For the thrill of the hunt! Mwuhahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed the button on his remote.

Like a number of times before the evil music began to play from nowhere. This was becoming more confusing.

"Seriously; could you tell us where it comes from?" Asked Mable "It just doesn't add up."

"You don't have clearance for THAT kind of information." Chuckled Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- My theme music would be the Barbie girl song!**

**Wallace: The thing with having an apprentice is that you don't just teach them to be as good as you; you send them into the world and hope they might surpass you. I'm hoping Kasimar can cause some real evil one day. Because the world could use more of it.**

**Xaria: **(She is shaking her head in exasperation). **Wallace is crazy; they might as well have borrowed some people from an asylum as contestants.**

**Chris: I was going to but the producers said that it could get us sued. Whoever invented the law was a spoilsport.**

* * *

Team Puzzle exited the tunnel and into daylight; they had been in the dark tunnel for a few minutes and had left Team Grenade behind. They felt confident they were in first … or at least not in last place.

Barney was still at the front of the boat as Andy rowed them along the river. The battle between pirate and cheerleader had ended in his favor and he was wondering what to do as he didn't like ding nothing. As Barney thought for a moment and had a stroke of genius … in his opinion.

"_I know! I could get Spider to bond with Quana; all I have to do is give a signal of some kind._" Though Barney. "_I think I'll start him off_."

"It's a good thing none of us fell in the water or our clothes would be ruined." Said Barney while making sure to put mild emphasis on the word cloths.

Spider noticed the emphasis and knew this was his que to put his first lesson to use. Though he felt like an inmate walking to his sentence he thought that Barney must know what he was doing.

"Hey Quana; speaking of *cough* cloths; I think you have a nice outfit, it *sneeze* brings out the singer in you … where *cough* did you get it?"

"Nobody has ever complimented my outfit before; it's usually something physical." Said Quana with a smile. "It's custom made from my Aunt Natz. I don't usually care much for cloths but I like the stuff she makes."

"I guess your favorite color is green or purple then." Guessed Spider.

"Close; it's actually orange." Said Quana as she looked down at her attire. "I differate myself from the other popular girls by wearing much less revealing clothing … wait, why are you asking about my cloths anyway?"

Spider froze for a moment as Quana looked at him curiously; what was he supposed to say? He glanced briefly at Barney for help and he gave him the thumbs up. Spider decided to improvise.

"Well; I … just like *cough* the color purple." Said Spider as he looked away into the water.

Quana started laughing and soon so was Zita. Spider just groaned in embarrassment and hung his head.

* * *

**Confessional- Not exactly smooth sailing.**

**Spider: **(He has his head in his hand and isn't looking at the camera). **That was so embarrassing. I ***cough* **mean seriously, I had an ***gag*** infinite amount of things to say and ***hard cough*** all I could think of was that I like purple. I'm such ***cough*** a dork. I should be thankful ***cough* that** Quana is even friends with me.**

**Quana: Spider could take a job as a stand up comedian; he knows how to put a smile on anyone's face. Not many people complement me on something trivial. It's always my hair, my attractiveness … or my butt. I'm glad I'm on this Team and not one with Kasimar, I don't like the way he looks at some of the girls.**

**Zita: What was that all about? I guess being in the hospital so much can't be good for your social skills right? …I wonder how much his medical supplies are worth…**

**Barney: Yaaaaar … that **_**could**_** have gone better. But it is not the pirate way to give up! I still have plenty more tricks of the trade of love to teach my apprentice. Next lesson; getting into their hobbies!**

* * *

Spider was quite silent; he was hoping the others would forget he was there, at least then he wouldn't feel so embarrassed. Andy was starting to get tired from rowing, his arms were like jelly.

"Can I have a break from rowing?" Asked Andy hopefully. "My arms feel as though they are going to fall off."

"Sure; I'll take over." Offered Zita.

Andy and Zita switched positions in the boat and they were quickly off again. Andy sighed in relief that he could finally have a rest.

"This is quite relaxing isn't it guys?" Said Andy cheerfully. "Just the seven of us the relaxing river water of a tropical Island."

"I wonder what type of fish are below the surface." Pondered Eleanor as she trailed a finger through the water. "Maybe there are some undiscovered species on this island."

"Undiscovered stuff usually sells for a pretty penny." Said Zita while she rowed.

"I wouldn't discover something for the money; I'd simply do it for the experience and to make friends."

"You mean make friends with an animal?" Asked Andy.

"Why not? Animals may not be able to speak but they're always there for you if you're sad or alone. Just like Frost and Dandelion are there for me." Smiled Eleanor sweetly.

* * *

**Confessional- I'll be there for you.**

**Eleanor: What can I say? I love animals! They are our friends and we can't get by without them. The way some places treat animals really disgusts me. Veal crates are something that I'd sooner die than grow to like.**

**Jimmy: I agree with Eleanor; animals are always there for you. Just like the pigeons in war … that's another thing my grandpa told me about. Without them it would have been a dark time indeed.**

**Barney: Talking about animals was fun … but I knew what would get us psyched up for a victory … a sea shanty!"**

* * *

"You know what would be perfect right about now?" Asked Barney as he stood up.

"A pill that could *cough* cure any illness?" Guessed Spider.

"Nope! A Sea Shanty!" Grinned Barney.

"Oh you can't be serious." Groaned Zita. "I. Do. Not. Sing!"

"I'll give it a go." Smiled Quana. "Start us of Barney."

"And let me cover my ears." Groaned Zita.

Barney nodded and cleared his throat. He then began to sing.

_The life of a pirate could be heck_

_You risk life and limb only to swab the deck_

_Out on the sea you make your monetary plunder_

_Unless the navigator makes a total blunder_

_Hi ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me_

_Yo ho, hi ho, we won't be back for tea_

_In societies works I am a spanner_

_Now I say take it away Quana_

Barney kept tapping a beat with his foot while Quana began to sing while attempting to make a pirate accent.

_Raise up the jolly Rodger_

_And don't pay rent to the shady lodger_

_Cannon fire on the waves_

_We'll sink ships to their graves_

_Skull and crossbones on the flag_

_The leader of the pirates is Captain Slag_

_Bang, boom, fire the cannon_

_Crash, wallop, defeated like Ganon_

_Yo ho, hi ho, a pirates life for me_

_Yo ho, hi ho, we won't be back for tea_

* * *

**Confessional: Batten down the hatches me heartie … I'd expect that from Barney.**

**Barney: That was as fun as sailing without a compass in the lawless seas! Too bad Zita didn't want to sing … but with a singing voice like that it's no wonder me first mate Spider likes Quana. Yo ho to the high seas!**

**Jimmy: Who knew singing could be so much fun; I'm not too bad at singing but Quana is like an expert! Her voice box must be really strong!**

**Quana: That was fun! Having Barney around means great fun. He could get into singing as well … it would have been better with music but I could feel the rhythm flowing through me, know what I mean?**

**Zita: **(She is twitching and shaking). **They didn't stop singing for a whole hour! I know they're my friends but I just really don't like singing. I bared it in the theme song challenge as it was required but when it's optional I'd rather do without.**

* * *

While Team Puzzle sang their Sea Shanty Team Jungle were rowing through a thicker part of the forest. Hoots and animal noises were audible around them. Irene looked quite happy at the sight of all the nature but the others weren't so thrilled.

"I don't like this place." Said Hector as he rowed slowly down the river so as to conserve energy. "I feel like we're being watched."

"That's just mother nature looking at us to make sure we don't hurt her planet." Smiled Irene.

"I hope she's not abusive." Muttered Hector quietly. "I wonder how the other teams are doing."

"Hopefully none of them are in trouble." Said Tabitha smoothly. "But at the same time I hope they're behind us. We can't keep losing like we do. We've already lost Fifi and Yessica; I don't even want to think about who goes next."

"Whoever costs us the challenge right?" Said Irene. "You said that a few days ago and it sounds completely fair."

"I agree." Said Gary. "Though the person who cost's us the challenge might think otherwise."

"It's a simple system but it works." Shrugged Tabitha. "I'm more concerned with more waterfalls. The last one was pretty scary and I don't want myself or any of you guys to get hurt."

"Good to see you're such a caring leader." Said Vinnie appreciatively. "And … thanks for clearing my name over the hole trap business."

"Oh; no problem." Smiled Tabitha falsely. "I could tell you didn't do it. As you've said, you stink at garden work … and I don't think you by yourself could have dug that hole and got back to us so quickly and without us noticing you were gone."

"I'd still like to apologize to Fifi for being ... well … a condescending prick basically. It just got me really steamed by what she said because…" Said Vinnie as he trailed off.

"Because what? You don't like sexism?" Guessed Gary.

"Yes. And also I actually strongly support gender equality but what Fifi said kind of upset me. But; you live and you learn, for better or worse."

"That's the right attitude to have." Said Irene as she put a hand on Vinnie's shoulder. "Good friends and a day with nature, this is my kind of challenge!"

Some of the water near the boat started to bubble. This attracted the team's attention.

"What's that?" Asked Hector. "It doesn't seem natural."

"Maybe it's a sea monster that's going to eat us!" Said Uzuri as she looked at the bubbles with excitement. "Or it could be Chthulu about to rise from his watery prison!"

"I seriously doubt it." Said Hector.

"But then again." Said Vinnie uncertainly.

At that moment the bubbles stopped and a tentacle erupted from below the water. A few bones were stuck to it and it was very large, it could drag the team below water with no effort required.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed most of the team simultaneously as Hector rowed them away at turbo speed in panic.

"Cool! A monster on the Island." Cheered Uzuri as she waved back to the tentacle.

* * *

**Confessional- A real monster? Monster madness!**

**Hector: Never again will I doubt a myth unless it is proven not to exist. Oh man; what creature could that tentacle have belonged to? But with my fear controlling me I really picked up speed.**

**Irene: **(She is sitting with wide eyes and is shaking in fear. After a few seconds of silence she lets out a whimper). **I never want to go on a boat again.**

**Uzuri: Why be scared of a monster? It's nothing personal; it's just their way of life. Some of the monsters in fiction are kinda cute; particularly the Bulborbs from Pikmin. Aren't they the cutest armless things ever?**

**Chris: **(He is smiling sadistically while holding a controller with a joystick and a few buttons). **It's amazing what interns can do when you threaten to fire them. Too bad they got away … if they'd been caught it would be like the time in elementary school where I locked those kindergarteners in a room that had the movie Evil Dead playing. Haha!**

* * *

Team Grenade was having a fairly peaceful time; Kasimar was still unconscious and Wallace was oddly silent, he kept writing in his note book which had the words 'Wallace's book of Evil' written on the front. Sometimes people wondered if Wallace was watching them from behind his sunglasses.

"I owe you one Oscar." Said Lavender. "Thanks for knocking Kasimar out, it's much easier to cope without him antagonizing me."

"No problem red." Smiled Oscar. "Though he will inevitably wake up … but his anger doesn't scare me. I think he's a coward; he didn't even face his fear yesterday."

"I don't like him." Said Raven. "I really t-t-think he could hurt someone badly i-if he wanted to."

"He talks the talk but he doesn't walk the walk." Said Mable. "Oh wait; I see another obstacle up ahead."

"Are those … I'm gonna kill Chris." Growled Xaria.

Up ahead were a number of floating mines. They looked fairly dangerous and touching them was probably a bad idea.

"Ok Oscar; take it slow and steady." Said Lavender as her gaze became fixed on the aquatic bombs.

"Understood." Agreed Oscar as he slowed down and began to gently and gingerly maneuver around the mines.

Oscar began to sweat a little; this was putting all his rowing skills to the test. His team were silent with anticipation. If they hit a bomb then they'd be knocked overboard. But the body builder seemed to know what he was doing and he got them through the trap without hitting one. A single bomb was ahead but it was to the side of the boat so it wouldn't a problem.

"Good job Oscar." Smiled Raven.

"What a team player." Said Mable.

"Good job big guy." Congratulated Lavender.

"Oh it was nothing." Said Oscar humbly. "I have tried pretty much every sport at some point in my life; rowing was just one of them."

At that moment they passed the lone last bomb and somehow in exploded. The boat shook violently and Xaria was sent flying up as she had been nearest the bomb.

"Yaaaaargh!" Screamed Xaria as she began to fall down towards the water.

"I've got you!" Called Oscar as he stood up and held out his arms; he caught Xaria and saved her from falling into the water.

"…Thanks." Said Xaria as she sat back down.

"No problem." Smiled Oscar.

Kasimar began to stir and opened his eyes. He grunted and looked around.

"Oh my head! Ow! What happened?" Asked Kasimar as his vision began to focus and he saw his team mates. "What are you stupid #bleep# looking at?"

"Nothing." Said Lavender.

"I think you're looking at me ditz." Said Kasimar quite rudely.

"As I said … nothing." Smirked Lavender as the others laughed.

Kasimar just snarled.

* * *

**Confessional- Burn!**

**Lavender: It just takes the right words and insults to ward off your enemies. And Kasimar is an enemy of mine. What was Chris thinking when he put him on the show?**

**Chris: I put him on because he'd be good for ratings; also I was hoping he'd hurt someone as fights make for good TV.**

**Kasimar: That **_**girl**_** better be thankful I'm not in a bad mood or she could end up with a broken spine! Yeah, that's right; I show no shame in hitting a girl. Yahahahaha!**

* * *

A few hours had passed since the beginning of the challenge; monsters had been seen, waterfalls had been fallen down, heads had been smacked and Sea Shanties were sung. All three teams were nearing the finish line. Normally it would have been impossible for a river to go all around the Island … but Chris had money and had a number of 'connections'. Currently Team Puzzle were in second and were nearing the end of the stretch of river they were on.

"Look ahead everyone." Said Andy. "The river is joining a larger section; I'm pretty sure we're near the end now."

"Onward to Victory!" Cheered Barney. "Row! Row! Row!"

"I'm rowing as fast as I can." Snapped Zita. "Cut me some slack! I've been rowing for over an hour!"

"I hope we don't lose." Said Jimmy from his seat near the front of the boat. "I don't want to vote any of my friends off."

"I wouldn't worry." Said Quana. "I have a feeling in my bones that we'll finish in a decent position."

"I hope you're right; Bonfire Ceremonies aren't exactly the icon of fun." Lamented Jimmy.

Team Puzzle exited the side river and joined the main one. Once they did they knew they weren't in first place anymore. A short distance up the river was Team Grenade and ahead of them was the finish line. As they continued to row they heard a cry of 'speed up' behind them. Upon turning they all saw Team Jungle behind them; it looked like they wouldn't lose after all.

Hector was rowing at full speed and was beginning to gain on Team Puzzle. It looked like neither he nor anybody on his team would be leaving today at the rate they were catching up.

"Go Hector!" Cheered Irene. "You can do it!"

* * *

**Confessional: Go Team Confessional!**

**Irene: Hector was doing really good; he seems quite strong despite his weight. But I seriously didn't expect what happened next…**

* * *

The Team Grenade boat was closing in on the finish line. Victory was theirs once again it seemed.

"Only a little more rowing Oscar; y-y-you can do it!" Encouraged Raven.

As Oscar rowed Wallace looked back at the trailing opponents.

"Why compete if not to cheat." Smirked Wallace to himself as he took out the silver bomb from earlier.

"What are you doing?" Asked Mable as her eyes landed on the bomb.

"This oughta be good." Chuckled Kasimar.

"Bombs away! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed the button and tossed the bomb at the other boats.

The silver bomb landed in the water behind the Team Puzzle boat and inches in front of the Team Jungle boat. All was silent for a moment.

KER-SPLOSHY BOOM!

The bomb exploded and blasted a mini tsunami of water around. Team jungle were right above the bomb when it exploded and were shot into the air and fell down to the water, their boat wrecked.

"Oh no!" Groaned Gary as he punched the water

Team Puzzle were much luckier; as they had been in front of the bomb when it went off their boat rode on the wave at a speed mightier than a pen. They landed just in front of Team grenade and crossed the finish line in first place.

"And the winners are Team Puzzle!" Yelled Chris through his megaphone.

Team Grenade crossed the line a moment later and all turned to Wallace and glared at him hatefully.

"We could have won! Why did you cheat?" Snapped Lavender.

"It's the evil kineevil way." Smirked Wallace. "And we didn't come in last, now Team Jungle is going to lose another member … you should be thanking me."

"I'll thank you alright!" Yelled Oscar as he picked Wallace up over his head and tossed him into the water.

* * *

**Confessional: Cheating done wrong.**

**Wallace: **(He is quite wet).** I kind of messed up back there … but we still didn't lose and once again Team Jungle has to vote someone off. I should change my name to Voldemort Dastardly Vile! Mwahahahaha!**

**Kasimar: This ended up pretty well, we may have lost but the target is off my back … for a while. And I'm here for another day. No effort required!**

**Xaria: …Idiot!**

**Raven: Wallace is a bit o-o-over the top and … Gary is right, I've got to keep v-voting for him.**

* * *

The race had come to a close and there were clear winners and losers; Chris stood before the twenty campers, a number of which were soaked, and smiled sadistically at their suffering.

"Great race everyone! This could be the best challenge so far! If only it wasn't a half hour show, then we could put all the best bits in … but sadly we can't. Team Puzzle have won thanks to Wallace screwing over his own team. All you puzzlers get a prize."

While Team Puzzle looked excited Team Grenade glared at Wallace.

"Your prize is a model of the titanic each, in mint condition. Let it remind you of your experiences on the water and also why you shouldn't go sailing without a life jacket! Haha!"

"You didn't give us any!" Snapped Quana as she crossed her arms.

"Who the hell cares?" Asked Chris happily. "Team grenade, no prize and no ceremony, you seven are all here for another day. And that leaves the wet water bombs Team Jungle. One of you is going to leave tonight … cast your votes and come to the Bonfire Ceremony in two hours. Until then you may do whatever you please. Now if you'll excuse me; I'm thirsty and I require a latté."

Chris left the campers, though not before sneering at Team Jungle. The six losers looked at each other; it was anyone's guess who went tonight.

* * *

**Confessional- This is a tricky one.**

**Jimmy: **(Bouncing up and down in joy). **We won! We won! That Wallace guy may be evil and pretty nasty … but I should thank him for helping us come first … though if I do he might get angry. Still; a winner is all of us!**

**Lavender: I am now feeling torn; when we lose next time do I vote for Kasimar or Wallace? Both are good picks … but I can't boot both at once. In time Lavender in time.**

**Tabitha: **(She has dried off though looks quite frustrated). **We lost again; I'm starting to consider asking Chris if I can trade teams with someone else. This vote is going to be a hard one; I'm not quite sure who to vote for. It won't be Uzuri as she's my ally … but out of Irene, Gary and Hector I'm not sure. I'll have to think about this.**

* * *

Tabitha exited the confessional and walked towards a nearby tree. Maybe she could just lean and think. It was pretty given that she wouldn't be going tonight … but she also didn't know who would be.

As Tabitha began to mentally list the pros and cons of keeping each team mate she saw Gary and Hector walking nearby, they hadn't spotted her though Tabitha heard Gary say the world alliance.

"What the." Said Tabitha as she hid behind the tree and began to listen.

"Who do we vote for Hector; I really can't decide." Said Gary. "I think anyone could go tonight."

"Well … I think I know who I'm voting for." Said Hector. "One word … Tabitha."

"What? Why her?" Asked Gary in confusion. "She's nice."

"Exactly … but in my opinion she seems too nice. She seems to never lose her temper, she's used the confessional more than any of us so far, and she told you those things Yessica sais … and then Yessica got the boot."

"So what are you getting at buddy?" Asked Gary in suspense.

"I think Tabitha is manipulating us." Said Hector. "I don't trust her … I say we vote her off. I don't think we'll be voted off, we both did good today. You in?"

"Well … Ok." Nodded Gary. "Though she might be innocent; then again you seem to know what you're talking about."

Tabitha had heard all this from her hiding place and a smile appeared on her face.

"So … they're going to betray me, I don't think so. I'll just need to talk to Uzuri."

* * *

**Confessional- What will happen? I don't know!**

**Tabitha: I think I know which one to eliminate … this must be stopped before it becomes a problem.**

* * *

A short while later Tabitha was talking to Uzuri in the woods. Before Tabitha did anything she needed Uzuri to know who they would vote for.

"So who should we vote for Tabitha? There's nobody I particularly dislike."

"Well I know who; he cost us the challenge so it's only fair. I'd like you to vote for." Said Tabitha as she whispered the name to Uzuri.

"Well; that's fine! I'll go and vote." Said Uzuri.

"Hang on Uzuri; I need your help for a moment." Said Tabitha. "I would like you to tell Vinnie to vote with us, don't tell him I told you to, just make sure he votes with us … can you do it friend?"

"Of course I can; you can count on me Tabitha!" Smiled Uzuri as she sped off to find Vinnie.

* * *

A short while later Uzuri found Vinnie in their cabin. He was relaxing on his bed before the ceremony began.

"Hey Vinnie; can I talk to you?" Asked Uzuri sweetly.

"Sure Uzuri; do you need anything?" Asked Vinnie as he got up and approached the door.

"I want to ask a something of you." Said Uzuri. "There's somebody I'm voting for and I'd like you to vote with me."

"Ok; who is it?

Uzuri leaned in and whispered the name in Vinnie's ear. Vinnie thought for a moment.

"He's one of my friends though; are you sure?"

"Quite sure … and I did help Tabitha clear your name, could you do this just this once? Pleeeeease?"

Vinnie looked into Uzuri's bright orange eyes and after a moment of thought he nodded.

"Ok; I'll do it this once, if they survive the ceremony I'd rather not vote for him again." Agreed Vinnie.

"Ok; see you later!" Smiled Uzuri very sweetly as she sped off to the confessional to cast her vote.

* * *

**Confessional- Right hand girl and a guy with no right hand.**

**Uzuri: That was easier than I thought it would be; I'd rather vote nobody off … but Tabitha is so smart, she knows what she is doing right? She's such a good friend to look out for me!**

* * *

Barney and Spider were in the mess hall on the same table. Barney seemed to be talking to Spider about love.

"You did good today me heartie; at this rate you'll be hooked up like a fish in no time!" Said Barney supportively.

"You think?" Asked Spider with his head in his hands and his elbows on the table.

"I do." Nodded Barney. "And you learnt something about her as well! Her favorite color is orange, so don't forget that."

"I think today was *cough* very embarrassing. I made *gag* a complete fool out of myself, though *hard sneeze* that's nothing new."

"Oh don't worry; you have plenty of time yet. Though hearing her singing that Sea Shanty makes me very unsurprised you like her" Grinned Barney as he jumped over the table beside Spider and slung an arm around his shoulder. "And besides; you've got no competition do you? No need to engage on a duel to the death for Quana's love like they did with princesses long ago."

"You have a point … so *cough* what's my next lesson?"

"I'm glad you asked buddy." Said Barney as he stood up. "Your next lesson is to get into her hobbies … so you'll be singing some super salsa Spider."

"But I can't sing, I *cough* sneeze or cough every couple of words as *hard cough* it is already. I'm really only good at academics."

"So write her a poem … then again that is a little cliché. Don't worry about it, let paging love doctor Barney sort everything out."

* * *

**Confessional: Is he really a qualified Doctor?**

**Barney: If at first you don't succeed, try once again. I hope to teach Spider that, he gives up to easily. I on the other hand never give up! It gives me a warm fuzzy when I help those in need. Arrrrr!**

**Spider: I don't think I'm ***cough*** in love … but I think I have a crush on Quana. And her ***sneeze* **singing today; abstractly awesome.**

* * *

Team Jungle were gathered around the bonfire ceremony area for the third time in the last six days. They had lost three times while the other teams had only lost once. Clearly luck was not on their side.

Gary sat near the front nearby the fire; it was less dark that way as he still didn't like the dark. Hector sat next to him and winked as Tabitha sat down.

Chris arrived with another tray of Marshmallows; this one had only five on it, the lowest amount so far. Chris, rather than looking disappointed or sympathetic, actually sneered at the team and laughed.

"Oh boy; you guys just keep losing! You're like a magnet for defeat; I think the contest is really only between Team Grenade and Team Puzzle. But I can insult you all summer, however I can only lower your team to five once."

Chris set down the tray and held up the first marshmallow.

"If I call your name; come and get your marshmallow, that means you are safe and here for another day. The person who does not get a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and ride the boat of losers. And you can't come back … *ever*."

Hector glanced at Tabitha and she glanced back. They both looked at the marshmallows confidently.

Vinnie had his fingers crossed and rocked back a forth a little. He didn't think he was going … but there was always a chance.

Uzuri, Irene and Gary looked calm; they had done nothing wrong and felt they were very safe.

"Well everyone; the votes were close … but were in negative favor of one particular person. I shall now hand out the marshmallows."

Chris held out the marshmallow in his hand and was silent for a few seconds.

"Tonight's first marshmallow goes to … Irene."

"Six days down; a lot more to go." Smiled Irene as she took and ate her marshmallow.

"Vinnie"

"Gary"

"Uzuri"

The only two without marshmallows were Hector and Tabitha. Both looked confident and not at all worried.

"This is the *final* marshmallow of the night … and it goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Tabitha."

Tabitha smiled and walked up to Chris. She collected her marshmallow and stood with the other four survivors.

Hector looked stunned; for the first time he was speechless and had no intelligent comment to say.

"Well fatso; you're out. It seems nerds just aren't really cut out for television. But I'm sure you can stuff your face at Playa Des Losers tubby."

Hector stood up and calmly walked to Chris.

"If I had a dollar for every brain you didn't have … I would have one dollar." Said Hector calmly.

He turned to the others.

"See you everyone; oh and watch-." Began Hector before Chris snapped his fingers and Chef Hatchet ran up, covered Hectors mouth and quickly dragged him to the boat of losers. Once he was on board Chef released his grip and started up the boat.

The boat of losers sped away from the Island; an Island without the letter H.

"Well; Hector is gone, you guys only have five left. I don't think any of you have a chance of even making the merge." Chuckled Chris. "You may all leave … though I'll probably see you losers again tomorrow."

Chris left the area laughing while the increasingly small Team Jungle left the Bonfire Pit and headed to bed.

* * *

**Confessional- Intellect didn't win wars.**

**Tabitha: It was obvious I was going to vote for hector. Not did he catch onto me … but he's a big headed loser! Gary will be feeling pretty scared now, though I kept him as I actually like edible food.**

**Gary: …So; what now? Hector's gone and I don't really have any allies. I'd better keep my head down for a while.**

* * *

Barney was standing outside the Team Puzzle cabin looking at the stars; they were very beautiful when street lights didn't block them out. It had been a great day; it was as if this challenge had been tailored specifically for him. And the duel with Lavender had been pretty fun as well.

Speaking of the intelligent red head Lavender was walking towards her cabin; maybe she enjoyed late nights like Barney.

"Ahoy Lavender!" Waved Barney.

"Oh hi Barney." Said Lavender. "Looks like your team won. If Wallace hadn't tried to cheat it would be my team that would have been the winners."

"Well; you can't win em all right yaaar?" Smiled Barney nicely. "Oh; and I want to say good job in the duel. You would make a great pirate you know."

"Thanks; but I'd prefer to be something like a teacher or a doctor." Smiled Lavender. "Good job Barney, I'll see you tomorrow … and I'll win as well."

"You hope!" Called Barney as Lavender entered her cabin.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame to sign off the episode.

"What a day huh? Barney seemed pretty talkative this time … but he's just a weirdo, not as good as me! I think Wallace might be in trouble after his mess up. Who will be the eighth to lose? Will Team Jungle ever bounce back? Can Spider be romantic? And will Kasimar survive his team's next elimination? I hope so. Find out all these answers next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Irene: Hector

Gary: Tabitha

Vinnie: Hector

Tabitha: Hector

Hector: Tabitha

Uzuri: Hector

* * *

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector.

* * *

And Hector is gone. Sorry if you liked him … but at least he wasn't manipulated by Tabitha right?


	14. Day 7, Part 1, A sadistic challenge

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that is owned by Frank15. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them.

**The warning: **This warning will represent each particular chapter now. This chapter contains Bullying, a sadistic host, an abusive sister, torture chairs, orange cabbage and some fridge horror. But don't worry because as always it is nothing M rated.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven BarneyxLavender VinniexUzuri and a secret couple.

**Note: **This is the chapter where is begins to get serious. In this chapter you will see why Kasimar is the main antagonist as well as a glimpse of Xaria's back story. Chris is also becoming a complete monster as well. And to all who have reviewed the story so far, thank you very much!

Let's rock and ride!

* * *

Chris Maclean was standing on the dock of shame; it was sunrise and he looked quite happy. Way happier than he had in days past … this could only mean bad news. Chris waved to the camera and flashed his famous grin while running his free hand through his perfect hair.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz, the show that people watch to see me, Chris Mclean, the best person in the universe. Too put it lightly it was a wet day, and I don't mean rain! The campers had to race boats around the Island's river system. I bet that boring blond Yessica wished she'd been there for the challenge … but who cares about a flat character? And before I forget, if you send any letters or emails to me about me picking my nose then I will sue you for everything you own. I'll win because I'm better than you. If only my nose wasn't so gooey then it wouldn't be squishy … oh crap! Well, I can edit that out."

Chris ran a hand through his hair to comfort himself and smiled once more.

"The race was completely epic. Barney and Lavender dueled; Team Puzzle sang a sea shanty, a tentacle controlled by yours truly scared Team Jungle and Wallace cheated once more. I think cheating is fine, it brings in the ratings and makes people unhappy! Haha! Wallace used a bomb this time … unfortunately it made Team Puzzle finish ahead of team grenade … but he blew the Team jungle boat to pieces. Wallace is one of my favorites indeed."

Chris took out a Wallace plush and pulled the string; it laughed evilly. Chris sniggered and tossed the doll to the side.

"We're making merchandise on the contestants. Among the highlights were Tabitha manipulated Uzuri into getting Vinnie's vote. That girl is really good, even if she's a weak girl. Though another good thing was Kasimar insulting gingers, seriously, he's right you know, they don't have souls Haha! Since Team Jungle lost they had to vote someone off; because of Tabitha finding out about Hector and Gary's secret alliance the one to take the fall was none other than Hector. Oh well; fat guys won't be missed. With Patch and Hector both gone is seems an Owen clone won't be winning this time. But who will win? Who will walk the dock of shame next? And will this next challenge be successful? I hope so; it'll have the contestants screaming 'uncle'. Find out in this episode of Total Drama Letterz!

(Theme song; I wanna be famous).

* * *

_Xaria was in her house playing on her DS; she had nearly beaten her high score. Her parents had gone out for a while and left her and her sister Jaron home alone. Jaron was a little mean … but Xaria shrugged it off as siblings tended to quarrel anyway. Though Jaron had hit her a few times and occasionally broke some of her stuff she still loved her sister despite her faults._

_Just as Xaria finished the level she was smacked on the back of the head by something hard. She fell to the floor and groaned as she looked up. Standing there was her sister Jaron, holding a baseball bat._

_Jaron had black hair a few inches longer than Xaria's; her eyes were blue and she was both stronger and taller than her little sister. Her shirt and trousers were both blue with pink spots on them._

"_Ow … why did you do that sis?" Groaned Xaria in pain._

"_Oh shut up twerp; I have something to tell you. Mum and Dad left me in charge … so you have to do what I say. And I say we play a game called 'Uncle'._

_Xaria's eyes widened in fear as Jaron raised the bat; before she could move it was swung on her back again and again._

"_Help!" Called Xaria but nobody came as the walls were soundproof. _

_This went on for about an hour until Xaria was barely conscious. The seventeen year old bar wielding girl towered over the smaller fourteen year old and leaned to her ear._

"_You're gonna tell mum and dad you fell down the stairs, if you don't … you'll be sorry." Whispered Jaron._

_Jaron left the room as Xaria let out a groan of agony. Her sister had a very big ego and always wanted to be the center of attention. Yet she had no friends while Xaria was generally accepted by all. Jealousy was deadly._

* * *

Xaria slowly opened her eyes and sat up. She was in bed and nowhere near Jaron. After letting out a sigh of relief she got out of bed and looked around. Raven and Lavender were asleep but Mable was dressed and standing by the doorway.

"Morning Xaria." Said Mable when she noticed Xaria. "Sleep well?"

"Not at all." Sighed Xaria. "Unpleasant dream."

"I have them sometimes; my ultimate nightmare is me being obese." Shuddered Mable. "Still; it's just a dream so it can't hurt you."

"Yeah; I don't care for dreams much. I'm more interested in what's actually happening … though that's usually nothing good at all." Grumbled Xaria.

"True; it may just be me but I think Chris is getting worse everyday. And the challenges are getting more dangerous as well. In my opinion aquatic mines is taking it a bit too far." Said Mable as she thought back to yesterdays challenge.

"The challenges are going to get worse and worse until Chris will lock us in a freezer full of polar bears; whoever doesn't die is through to the next round."

"Chris wouldn't do that … or at least I hope he wouldn't." Gulped Mable

* * *

**Confessional: He would.**

**Chris: I would … but I don't want any lawsuits, the contracts don't cover the deaths of the contestants … unless I update them of course … hmmm, I might just do that.**

**Mable: I don't know why but I have a **_**bad**_** feeling about today's challenge. I don't know why but I just do. **

* * *

"In case we lose; who should we vote off?" Asked Mable. "Though to be honest there are really only two choices.

"I despise Kasimar more than my sister." Said Xaria promptly. "And Wallace is just insane; I'd say Kasimar, he's just a bully … and I've had experience with bullies."

"Bullies are just little cowardly people trying to make people feel as little as them." Said Mable kindly.

At that moment there were two yawns and Raven and Lavender sat up and rubbed their eyes.

"Another day, another migraine." Said Lavender as she got out of bed. "I wish we had a day off sometime."

"That's not In Chris's n-nature." Said Raven as she got out of her bed as well. "He's a sadist."

"And unlike Uzuri he isn't sweet." Agreed Lavender.

"Shall we go and face today's torture?" Asked Xaria dully. "Why prolong the inevitable, it's rather pathetic really."

And with that Xaria exited the cabin without another word.

"I wonder how Oscar is doing." Pondered Lavender. "It can't be easy bunking with Wallace and Kasimar."

"I wouldn't worry." Said Mable. "Have you seen his muscles? I reckon he could knock Kasimar out cold with one punch."

"Why is Kasimar so nasty?" Asked Raven. "He's kinda s-scary."

"Some people just have no redeeming qualities." Said Lavender. "And Kasimar is one of those people."

* * *

**Confessional- I have a redeeming quality; you can confess in me!**

**Lavender: One could wonder what goes on in Kasimar's mind. He's cringe worthy … I feel unsettled with him around; I've seen the way he looks at some of us.**

**Xaria: I don't mind the challenges too much; we're here to suffer for a big cash prize, I've suffered for years so this is standard for me. Mable's pretty nice … unlike a lot of people.**

* * *

"Shut up!" Yelled Oscar to Kasimar. Oscar was feeling stressed; Kasimar had been telling a few horrendous black comedy jokes, ones he would have rather not heard.

"Oh; and how are you gonna make me?" Sneered Kasimar. "You may have muscles but you lack any intelligence to go along with it, you're just a useless abomination!"

"Useless am I? I may not be the smartest guy in the world but I'm not stupid … and at least I have friends, you're the useless one!"

"Who cares about friends? I don't need nobody!" Growled Kasimar.

"You've just proven your stupidity right then. That's a double negative; basically you've just said you need somebody." Smirked Oscar as he crossed his arms victoriously. "Maybe if you were smarter you'd be more intimidating."

"Oh shut up you stillborn tapeworm!" Yelled Kasimar.

Oscar blinked; had Kasimar just called him a _stillborn tapeworm_ … that was … creepy. Oscar took a step towards Kasimar.

"You really talk tough and come up with good insults." Said Oscar. "And you also scare a lot of people. Though people like you never seem to get what's coming to you … just remember that I'm not scared of you."

"You should be; back home I rule the school, if anyone doesn't toe the line or they stand up to me they get creamed. I have several henchmen. You wouldn't last at my school."

"I don't think I'd want to go there; I'm happy where I am." Said Oscar as he shrugged his muscular shoulders.

"Whatever; I'll see you later ya failed abortion." Laughed Kasimar as he left the cabin.

Oscar was silent and then snarled; Kasimar was, in one word, vile. He would get what was coming to him eventually, he didn't care who did it as long as he was humiliated as publicly as possible.

Wallace began to laugh evilly; he had been watching the whole argument from his bed and seemed quite amused.

"What are you laughing about?" Asked Oscar with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh nothing; it's just great to see my right hand man has found an arch nemesis. All good villains need one. Dick Dastardly has the narrator, Voldemort has Harry and Dr. No has James Bond." Cackled Wallace as he pulled up his suitcase from under the bed and opened it up.

"Dare I ask what you've got in there?" Asked Oscar while wondering if he even wanted the answer.

"Oh, you know; just bombs, evil gadgets and dynamite, nothing special." Shrugged Wallace.

"Where do you get all that stuff?" Asked Oscar with a blink.

"That's classified information unless you are evil." Said Wallace with his usual evil grin.

"Whatever; I'm gonna get breakfast … hopefully Kasimar won't cause too much trouble today, but it's inevitable really."

* * *

**Confessional: As inevitable as me being used to confess.**

**Oscar: I couldn't have been placed on a worse team; the girls are all fine, I have no problem with them. But Kasimar and Wallace are seriously starting to get on my nerves … if Kasimar wants a fight I'll give him a fight. Maybe put him in a dentist chair and perform some amateur dentistry.**

**Wallace: I have a target on my back for the failed cheating last time; but I can redeem myself. How can I do that you may ask; simple … with more cheating! Mwahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Barney and Spider were still in their cabin; Jimmy and Andy had already left and that meant Barney had time to give Spider his next lesson. Barney stood in front of Spider pacing while Spider sat on one of the bottom bunks and listened to Barney's every word.

"Ok Spider; you've already complimented her cloths so now you've got to get into Quana's hobbies; namely singing." Said Barney as he paced left and right. "Now; you've got to make a good impression with your singing, so don't mess it up."

"But I've already told you; I *cough* can't sing." Said Spider. "And I wouldn't know what to sing *hard cough* about anyway."

"Well; if you can't sing then you'll have to do the next best thing … play her some good quality music yaaar!" Suggested Barney. "You can already play the flute; just play to your strengths."

"Like what?" Asked Spider. "I'm no Justin when it *splutter* comes to looks. And I'm not *cough* a social butterfly either."

"True, true … but you have intelligence and a good nature; and that my friend makes up for your poor physical health, and your, yohoho, bad hair."

"Thanks, I think." Mumbled Spider as he wiped his nose. "But don't you *cough* think you're taking this *cough* a little too seriously?"

"Nope! Listen me heartie; you should know that shipping is a serious business along with school, perfecting an accent and tiddlywinks … well maybe not that last one. But my point remains; you can't possibly fail under my watchful eye. Now … how about an apple for your teacher?"

"I don't have one … I'm *cough* really allergic to them." Explained Spider. "Eating even one bite would be really bad for me."

"Well at least you know not to order apple pie on your first date. Now come cabin boy; there's plenty to do so let's get a move on! Onward to the high seas of the challenge!"

"The challenge hasn't started yet." Said Andy as he walked in through the door. "Though as I was walking to the cabin I heard the word 'date'. I'm guessing you don't mean the type of nut, right?"

Spider gulped; this whole love lesson thing was supposed to be between him and Barney; what would Andy think.

"Oh it's nothing Andy me cabin boy; I'm just giving Spider love lessons." Smiled Barney.

"Really? I never had the impression you were an expert at love." Said Andy while glancing at Spider with a look of amusement. "So … who's the girl? It's not Nakia right?"

"Not at all." Laughed Barney. "If I were the host then that girl would walk the plank!"

"So who is it?" Asked Andy with a look of both interest and excitement.

"None other than our mermaid of the stage … Quana." Grinned Barney while Spider audibly groaned and covered his head with his hands.

* * *

**Confessional: The cat's out of the bag … but isn't that animal cruelty?**

**Andy: Spider likes Quana? Didn't see that coming, but it's so original, a sick guy and a singer. Nowadays it's always punk and prep or teen and vampire … **_**don't **_**get me started on the last one or we could be here all night! Let's just say it was a crazy week with my cousins, I'll leave it at that.**

**Spider: Loose lips sink ships; Barney ***cough*** should know that being a pirate and ***cough* **all.**

**Barney: I don't think it matters I told Andy; we can trust him right? And it's not like I'm going to tell that dick Kasimar or Quana herself.**

* * *

Andy looked surprised and then smiled.

"So; how long have you liked her Spider?" Asked Andy curiously.

"Since the fear challenge; she *gag* really helped me with my *cough* phobia; just like I helped her *sneeze* with hers." Explained Spider.

"So … Barney is giving you love lessons?" Asked Andy with a raised eyebrow. "Something tells me that won't end well."

"Ah don't be such a soggy sport Andy." Chuckled Barney. "I'm an expert … and I could help you if you ever get to like a girl. So; been making goo-goo eyes at anyone?"

Andy turned away in embarrassment and walked back out the door.

"Nope; but good luck helping Spider, and good luck getting Lavender!" Called Andy as he left.

"I don't like her like that space man!" Called Barney with a little embarrassment. After a moment of silence Barney turned back to Spider. "Grab your flute Spiderman; we're gonna make some music … just don't make it look obvious, and follow my lead me heartie!"

Barney ran out of the cabin as Spider sighed; not unhappily but in amusement. He pulled his suitcase out from under the bed and opened it; inside were not just his cloths but also his flute and some medical supplies. Spider took a pill out of one of the small boxes and gulped. He then slid his suitcase back under the bed and left the cabin.

"Stupid white blood *cough* cell deficiency." Mumbled Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Stone tablets are not medical.**

**Spider: I've got so many illnesses … I've ***cough*** got to take several different pills everyday. If ***cough* **I went without them I'd be in trouble.**

* * *

As Spider left the cabin and headed to the mss hall Zita exited the girl's cabin; she heard spider mumble about pills under his breath. A sudden urge began to grow in her, one she knew was bad.

"No Zita." Said Zita to herself sternly. "Taking someone's medical supplies is bad; you don't make friends that way … but if I don't … the anxiousness and paranoia become too much. But it's not right … even so we all have needs, material possessions happen to be mine."

Zita wrung her hands nervously and thought for a moment; after a few seconds she sighed and entered the boy's cabin. She exited about a minute later with a few boxes of medical supplies, a pirate comic and a model rocket.

"I hope I won't regret this." Said Zita quietly.

* * *

**Confessional- I think I've stole enough.**

**Zita: I know I shouldn't; but I can't help myself. As long as I stay quiet and don't say much then all will be well … I hope.**

* * *

Gary was sitting under a tree near camp just thinking. Hector had been voted out the night before … but how had it happened? It must have been four votes to two; but … that meant Vinnie had voted against his friends. Gary wondered what the next course of action would be.

"I'm alone in this game now; Raven's still here … but she's on another team. What should I do?" Said Gary to himself. "I could be next."

At that moment Vinnie came by; he noticed Gary looking worried and decided to talk to his friend.

"Hey Gary; what's up?" Asked Vinnie as he sat down next to Gary.

"Oh; hi Vinnie, I'm just thinking how Hector could have been eliminated last night; there were six of us so it would have to have been a two to four vote split because me and Hector voted together."

"Are you implying I voted for Hector?" Asked Vinnie nervously.

"Well it depends … did you?" Asked Gary.

Vinnie gulped and began to explain; hopefully Gary wouldn't be too mad.

"Um … well … I kinda … yes, I did vote for him." Admitted Vinnie.

"Any reason why?" Asked Gary. "Or was it a coin flip vote?"

"Uzuri asked me too; it was to repay the favor for helping clear my name … and she's a god friend so I agreed, though only that once. I didn't think that Hector would actually go."

Gary looked confused; Uzuri had asked Vinnie to vote for hector, not Tabitha.

"That's odd; Hector suspected Tabitha." Said Gary vaguely.

"Suspected Tabitha of what?" Asked Vinnie with interest as he adjusted his hat.

"Well; I have a confession to make Vinnie. I and Hector had an alliance since the human snooker challenge. Yesterday Hector suggested voting Tabitha off as he … he thinks she's manipulating us and doesn't trust her. Personally I'm not sure if she's evil or not … but if Uzuri asked you to vote for Hector it really confuzzles things."

"Why? You don't think Uzuri is the puppet master do you?" Asked Vinnie in surprise.

"I don't. She may be a bit strange and more than a little quirky … and yet I don't think she has a mean bone in her body." Said Gary as he twirled his spatula in his left hand.

"Yeah; she's nice alright; I always did like blonds." Chuckled Vinnie before stopping and blushed with wide eyes. "Err … that could be said differently."

"Dude; do you have a crush on Uzuri?" Asked Gary with a smile and an air of surprise. "You're a much braver man than me."

"What do you mean by that?" Inquired Vinnie.

"Well; she has that emo doll … and let's not forget her love of the SAW series, if you dated her she may expect you to get into her hobbies … and that's not including burning ants or liking the strangest things."

"I never said I liked her like that." Said Vinnie in defense of himself. "I am allowed to think she's cute and not have a crush on her. Still; dating doesn't sound so bad … though I doubt I can find the right girl on a reality TV show. But her eyes are pretty … damn! I'm just making things worse!"

"It's no problem Vinnie; you like who you like, it just shows how brave you are." Grinned Gary. "Shall we get breakfast, any preferences for a meal?"

"I wouldn't mind Macaroni cheese." Said Vinnie with a tone of longing. "It's my favorite food, mum cooks it wonderfully."

"Hopefully I can live up to your standards then." Said Gary. "I love a challenge."

* * *

**Confessional: A Guy with a Metal Arm and a Sweet Sadist … love sure is blind!**

**Vinnie: Don't get me wrong; Uzuri is a good friend, not to mention she's always happy no matter what. It's just that love kinda embarrasses me … and also I wouldn't know the first thing about dating. Boy; I have a **_**weird**_** taste in girls.**

**Gary: Boy; Vinnie's time here so far has been like a soap opera. But more importantly; me and him are the only guys left on the team, we're outnumbered by the girls … I hope we don't lose again.**

**Uzuri: Do you ever get the feeling you've missed something gut wrenchingly important? I get that a lot … back home people tend to avoid me a bit.**

* * *

In the mess hall the nineteen campers sat in their teams eating breakfast. It was getting better thanks to Gary tutoring Chef but the road to perfection is a long one. As Usual Team Jungle enjoyed good food thanks to Gary while Team Puzzle and Team grenade had to eat what looked like orange cabbage, it didn't taste too bad but it definitely wasn't supposed to be the color it was.

"I don't get it." Said Jimmy as he looked at his unnaturally orange meal.

"What don't you get?" Asked Eleanor who was sitting next to Jimmy.

"Last time I checked cabbage was supposed to be green, not orange. I wonder what lurks in Chef's kitchen." Said jimmy.

"Probably nothing good; I'm going to guess a sort of salad monster with a pumpkin head, radish arms and a slimy corrosive body of mushy peas. It sounds as gross as it would taste." Gagged Eleanor. "I really don't like peas."

"A salad monster; that sounds like something from a cartoon gone horribly wrong … and there's something else that's bothering me." Said Jimmy as he briefly glanced at the Team Grenade table.

"What is it?" Asked Eleanor though she had an idea of what it was.

"It's that guy with the blue mohawk Kasimar." Explained Jimmy. "He just scares me; I don't know why but being near him gives me the creeps, I just think I'm gonna grow to dislike him."

"Practically everyone hates him; you're not alone." Said Eleanor sweetly. "People like him act tough but they are nasty cowards deep down. Just keep your distance and you'll be alright."

"Thanks Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy.

"Anytime." Said Eleanor as she returned the smile.

* * *

**Confessional- It came from the fridge.**

**Jimmy: I guess Eleanor is my best friend here; we're both the youngest of our gender and she's so nice. Maybe the guys would like to meet her; they'd get along swimmingly.**

**Eleanor: Jimmy is really nice. He's a little trusting and naïve, but as long as he knows to stay away from Kasimar then all will be well. That bully won't last much longer … at least, I hope he doesn't. He kinda scares me a bit as well.**

* * *

"Hellooooooooooo campers!" Said Chris as he walked into the mess hall with a look on his face that was very unsettling. "Ready for your next *snigger* challenge?"

"I don't like the sound of Chris's laughter." Gulped Irene.

"Neither do I." Agreed Gary.

"You're right to dislike it because today's challenge might be a _little_ … painful! Haha!" Laughed Chris and the look on his face got worse as he said it.

"Do we get to cause pain?" Asked Kasimar as Chris now had his full attention. "There are some I wouldn't mind snapping the bones of."

"Well I thought about that but sadly the producer wouldn't allow an all out brawl between the teams." Shrugged Chris. "So … you guys are going to get pain from our interns because that's what I pay them for."

"Is this anything like the b-boot camp challenge?" Asked Raven uneasily. "I don't know if I c-can do that."

"Nope; it's brand new … and while none of you will probably enjoy it I sure will, so all is well! Now; the day is young and this challenge could take a while, so everyone follow me and I shall explain the rules."

All the campers got up and followed Chris; but his facial expression was still very unsettling, and they would be enduring pain … what could he be planning."

"I don't know about you guys." Said Andy with a look of worry. "But I've got a _bad_ feeling about this challenge."

* * *

**Confessional- I have a feeling I will be used soon!**

**Kasimar: If the challenge involves pain it's not going to be a problem, I excel at causing it … though I don't like taking it. But does anyone? Still; this could be a good opportunity to scare that blond kid, Yahaha!** (Kasimar pounds his fist into his palm while grinning evilly).

**Lavender: I don't think I'm going to enjoy this; Chris likes torturing us and the way he laughed while announcing the challenge makes me think it'll be worse than usual.**

* * *

Chris led the campers to a clearing near camp; nineteen chairs had been set up and each had a number of devices and implements attached to them such as a hammer, a heater under the chair, a spinner and much more. While the campers looked at the chairs in shock, confusion or even amusement Chris smirked sadistically, he was _really_ going to enjoy this challenge.

"Ok everyone; today we're going to play a game, one that I played a lot in my youth. Here's a hint, it involves wet willies, Indian sunburns and a Polish Charlie Horse. And there is one word you have to say to end everything.

"Oh no … you can't actually mean…" Said Quana before trailing off in shock.

"He wouldn't." Said Vinnie with a growl.

"He would." Mumbled Eleanor.

"I can see by your reactions that you know what the challenge will be then." Said Chris with a chuckle. "We're going to be playing … Uncle!"

Most campers looked horrified; Jimmy however looked confused and tilted his head to the side.

"What's 'uncle'?" Asked Jimmy.

"It's the greatest game in the world." Said Kasimar as he approached Jimmy with a smirk. "Shall I show you how to play this game that was made for children?"

"Sure; I love games." Smiled Jimmy. He immediately wished he hadn't agreed.

Kasimar grabbed Jimmies right arm and began twisting it really badly.

"Say uncle!" Said Kasimar sadistically while everyone else was momentarily frozen in horror.

"Uncle! Uncle!" Wailed Jimmy.

"Say _what_? Asked Kasimar with a sneer.

"Uncle!" Yelled jimmy.

SMACK!

Kasimar dropped to his knees in pain at being punched in the back of the head; he managed to turn around and saw Quana looking at him in disgust and fury.

"You coward! You just assaulted a ten year old, and you're what, seventeen? Do you have no shame?" Roared Quana as she reared back and kicked Kasimar in the balls … hard.

"Oh football in the goal." Whimpered Kasimar as he went cross eyed and fell over in great pain.

Quana looked satisfied and turned to Jimmy.

"You ok Jimmy?" Asked Quana in concern. "Did he hurt you?"

"I'll be fine." Said Jimmy as he rubbed the sore spot on his arm. "And thank you."

"No problem." Smiled Quana.

From a short distance away Spider and Barney had watched this whole scene. Barney looked mightily impressed and Spider had his mouth agape in shock, and yet he was really impressed.

"Just so you know." Whispered Barney. "Girls can be really cuddly when they get angry."

"Really?" asked Spider in surprise.

"If you're all done helping the twerp." Said Chris impatiently. "I'd like to explain the rules of the challenge."

"We all know how to play uncle you know." Said Tabitha as she crossed her arms.

"But some of the audience might not; I've got to think of everyone here even if nobody is even nearly as important as me." Explained Chris.

"Narcissist." Grumbled Zita.

* * *

**Confessional: Big headed much?**

**Zita: Boy; Chris takes self absorbed to a new level. He's really nasty … while I just have urges. The stuff is in my loot sack, hopefully nobody will notice.**

**Tabitha: One word can describe Chris … and that word is dickhead.**

**Jimmy: That was pretty painful; I don't like this 'uncle' game anymore.**

* * *

"The rules of this challenge are fairly simple; you will be tortured and put through pain until either you are the only contestant left or if you yell uncle, hence the name of the challenge. Saying aunt won't work, it has to be uncle." Explained Chris while looking pleased at the looks of horror on the contestant's faces. "The first team to lose all of their members loses; the first place team as usual will get a prize and it's a really good one. Any questions?"

"You're just gonna say 'no questions, wonderful' aren't you?" Said Xaria snarkerly.

"Ok; since you've said that I'll prove you wrong!" Snapped Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Reverse psychology.**

**Xaria: I knew that would work; he always wants to be the center of attention and likes to make himself right and us wrong. Know your enemies and their weaknesses.**

* * *

"Ok; any questions?" Asked Chris. "I'll answer them but you may not like the answers."

"Do we have to sit as teams?" Asked Uzuri. "There is strength in numbers."

"You can sit in any chair you want; you could sit next to someone you don't like to make sure they fail." Explained Chris. "Though it's obvious Team Jungle is going to fail as they're the losing team. Haha!"

Chris laughed while Team Jungle looked annoyed; Irene then smirked as she had an idea.

"I got a question and an answer; you know why you're single? Because you're bad in bed!"

Everyone started to laugh while Chris looked really angry.

* * *

**Confessional- Villainous breakdown.**

**Chris: How dare that wretch say that to ME, Chris Maclean! Maybe if her team loses she'll suicide out of sadness; haha! That would teach her a lesson. Nobody gets to talk to me like that as I'm awesome!**

* * *

"Ok, whatever!" Snapped Chris. "Everyone get to a chair and we'll begin the challenge."

As the contestants began to get into the torture chairs Kasimar got back up and shook off the remaining pain. He had a low tolerance for the peak of pain though after a while he got used to it. That girl had some nerve.

"So babe; wanna kiss me better?" Grinned Kasimar while raising his large eyebrows up and down.

"As if you creep! If I wanted to go out with someone they would be sweet, kind, intelligent and respect me … you are none of those things you lout!" Snapped Quana as she turned on her heel to get into a chair.

"Maybe I'm not; but I acknowledge you have a great ass." Smirked Kasimar wickedly.

On his way to his chair he smacked Quana on the butt … _HARD_. Quana yelped in horror, complete shock and discomfort. She stared at Kasimar as he sat down on his chair and laughed cruelly. With one hand on the part of her backside that Kasimar had hit she slowly sat down in a chair far away from the nasty bully.

* * *

**Confessional: Even I am shocked.**

**Quana: **(She looks horrified and extremely shocked). **I always knew Kasimar was bad just from seeing him with his own team … and he's hitting on me now? Oh god, this might get ugly. He actually smacked my butt! That creep; does he only see females as objects or something? The sooner he's gone the better. **(She breaths in and out a few times and looks at the camera meekly). **And it kinda hurt.**

**Kasimar: What can I say; all girls want me, everyone at school does … of course, I'd pulverize them if I didn't. Still; messing with that girl oughta be fun when I'm not hurting the kids. Yahahahaha!**

**Spider: **(His normally calm nervous attitude is gone and he looks _pissed_). **What is Kasimar's** *cough*** problem? Does he have no** *sneeze*** stopping point? First he assaults Jimmy and then** *cough*** he touches Quana back there. He's going to pay ***splutter***one way or another. A good solid heavy object** *sneeze*** on the head should teach him a lesson! **(He calms down a bit and looks saddened). **But how** *cough*** can someone like me defeat Kasimar? He's burly** *hard cough*** and strong … and I'm not.**

**Wallace: That was pretty brutal my even my standards … and I loved it! Mwahahahahahaha!**

**Vinnie: That was appaulling! Kasimar is a piece of filth; what kind of a mother raised him? I hope Gary is right about karma catching up with everyone.**

* * *

Many hateful glares were sent at Kasimar as the interns strapped the campers into the chairs. Chris however looked amused.

"Yep; he sure put that girl in his place." Chuckled Chris. "Ok; the challenge begins … now! I think we'll start with something … shocking!"

Chris took out a remote with many buttons on it and pressed one of them. Instantly every camper received a painful constant electric shock. Chris laughed at the screams and yelps.

"Err; are you actually enjoying this Chris?" Asked Chef in great shock.

"Yep; it's funny isn't it?" Smiled Chris.

"I admit some of the campers deserve this … but finding this kind of suffering funny isn't right!" Snapped Chef. "You're going too far."

"Oh shut up." Said Chris dryly. "I can do what I want because I'm Chris MacLean! Now go back to the kitchen!"

Chef glared at Chris and skulked back to the kitchen.

Uzuri was doing something weird; she was actually enjoying the electrocution. Her hair stood on end and she giggled and smiled erratically.

"This feels … very nice … and it feels as though … my head is … getting sucked into my … tingly spine … Tee … Hee!" Laughed Uzuri.

"I'm glad, OUCH, to see you're, OUCH, enjoying it." Said Vinnie through cries on pain from the high amount of voltage.

While this was happening Chris was laughing his head off.

"Oh; this brings back old memories of when I was a freshman playing uncle with kindergarteners. Yep; good times." Smiled Chris to himself despite the fridge horror this caused.

* * *

**Confessional- Zap!**

**Uzuri: That felt so tingly; it really puts a spring in my step. And my bones are all tingling. Teehee! This is going to be fun!**

**Oscar: At least somebody was enjoying it; that way Chris can't get full satisfaction from our suffering. If I were the producer I would have fired him long ago.**

* * *

The electrocution stopped for a moment which allowed the campers to relax for a moment.

"Anybody want to say the wimp word?" Asked Chris. "It rhymes with buncle!"

Nobody responded despite the pain that they had just endured.

"Ok; I'll give you a minute's break to think about it … but after that, it's back to business!" Smirked Chris.

Barney was seated between Andy and Spider. While Andy didn't look too bothered at all Spider looked angry and glared in Kasimar's direction hatefully. Barney noticed this and had an idea what it was about.

"You ok me heartie? Is this about what Kasimar did you your mermaid?" Asked Barney quietly.

"Yes; I don't know why *cough* but it angered me more than *cough* I've ever felt. I don't know why *sneeze* but when he hurt Quana I felt like *sneeze* going psycho on him." Said Spider. "I'm not a revenge type *cough* person … but I just feel upset."

"You know what me heartie; that shows you do truly care about her." Whispered Barney. "If I were the host I'd make Kasimar walk the plank. Just remember cabin boy; there is no stronger weapon than love."

"So what can I *cough* do?" Asked Spider.

"Just talk to her and comfort her when you're both out … or when the challenge is over and we win Yaaaaar." Said Barney wisely. "Girls love it when boys are nice to them."

"Heads up guys; Chris is raising the remote." Cautioned Andy.

"Oh boy." Groaned Spider.

"Bring it old man!" Called Barney with a genki grin.

"Ok; I will!" Yelled Chris as he activated the electricity again but applied more voltage to Barney's chair. The pirate teen whooped in excitement despite the pain he felt.

Chris turned to the shocked cameraman and smiled.

"This challenge has begun and it's anyone's game. Does this challenge bring back memories for any of you? All awesome people are bullies. But first I have three important questions; who will say uncle first? Who will last the longest? And will anyone find out about Zita stealing from them? Find out when we return on Total Drama Letterz!"

"And cut." Said the cameraman. "We have three minutes till we're back on the air."

"Good; that gives me time for a latté; someone bring me my latté NOW!" Yelled Chris.

* * *

And there we have it; this challenge is nothing but trouble and also to satisfy Chris's sadistic needs. I bet you all hate Kasimar now right? Well … you probably hated him already really.

The next chapter is even more action packed than this one … or at least I hope it will be.

Did you like the chapter? Or did you hate it? Why not tell me and leave a review. Long ones are best but I like em all! :)


	15. Day 7, Part 2, The torture continues

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; it belongs to Frank15. I do however own every single one of the twenty eight OC's in this story so please; do not steal them.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains verbal bullying, stealing, torture, injury, electricity and flames. Nothing M rated at all though.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor GaryxRaven AndyxMable VinniexUzuri and a secret couple.

**Note:** I can't believe I've forgotten to mention this until now but I have got a TV Tropes article on TDL; it was made by Bad-Asp so thank you to him once again. If you want to see it the link can be found on my profile. But for now; enjoy the show!

Don't change the channel!

* * *

"And we're back to the best challenge so far!" Said Chris with great amusement as the contestants were still getting electrocuted. "If you've just joined us you've missed a load of action, all involving the lovable Kasimar. He insulted Oscar, he hurt Jimmy and he slapped Quana on her ass! I look forward to what he'll do next!"

Chris turned up the voltage to the next level. Many screams, howls and groans of pain emitted from the campers; Uzuri however just laughed.

"Teehee! More voltage!" Cheered Uzuri in excitement.

"Hmmm; I'm shocking them with about 200 volts and none of them are backing out. How about over nine thousand volts?" Grinned Chris in sadistic pleasure as he cranked the voltage up to its maximum scale.

"Teeheeheeheehee!" Laughed Uzuri as she erratically shook in excitement. The others weren't sharing her enthusiasm however.

"Owie!" Yelped Jimmy as his mess of long blond hair stood on end and his hat jiggled as well.

"Yaaaaaaaaar!" Groaned Barney in pain as he gripped the sides of the chair to nullify the pain.

"Chris you maaaaaaaniac!" Screamed Tabitha as a large electric current went up her spine.

* * *

**Confessional- I am 'shocked', get it?**

**Jimmy: **(His hair is a mess and he looks a little worse for wear). **This challenge wasn't much fun; I don't really like pain. At least I was out before the real torture began.**

**Quana: As if I wasn't sore enough already … what Chris did next was just plain bad.**

* * *

Chris looked over the nineteen victims suffering from the electric shock. This wasn't good enough, they weren't crying for mercy yet. But it was pretty funny to here them yell in pain.

"So … anyone ready to give up yet? Any cowards?" Asked Chris with a chuckle.

Some campers sure felt like it but if they quit it would possibly make their team lose. One camper however could take no more.

"Uncle!" Yelled Jimmy in pain.

"What a pu-Yaaaaargh!" Yelled Kasimar in pain as the shock returned.

Jimmy's restraints unlocked and Jimmy leapt out of the chair barely able to stand on his feet.

"Sorry guys." Apologized Jimmy to his team. "I just can't take it anymore.

"That's ok, OUCH, Jimmy." Said Andy nicely.

"Wimp!" Jeered Kasimar with a laugh.

"Shut up!" Snapped Spider much to everyone's surprise as well as his own.

"Anyone else want to quit?" Asked Chris. "Things are going to get hotter in a moment."

"I'm sorry, OWWWW, everyone." Said Raven to her team with a sigh. "Uncle!"

Raven's chair released her and she got out faster than blinking. As she did everyone's chairs promptly stopped frazzling them and they sighed in great relief.

"Ok then losers; we've got two quitters." Chuckled Chris. "That means we've got to take it up a notch."

Chris laughed sadistically after saying that and the campers gulped as this could end up badly for them.

* * *

**Confessional- Burn baby burn!**

**Raven: I can't help it; I just h-have a low tolerance to pain. It's why I'm a l-little scared of Kasimar, he might hurt me…**

**Xaria: Its official … Chris is a bigot!**

* * *

As Jimmy and Raven watched from the side Chris pressed another button on his remote. Some flames began to burn under the chairs; it didn't physically touch them in any way but it was all too obvious what was going to happen.

"This is gonna be worse than seeing Owen naked." Groaned Mable as the heat below the chair began to build up.

"Isn't this a bit much?" Asked Quana nervously. "I'm already feeling a bit sore."

"I'll kiss you better." Grinned Kasimar perversely while wiggling his bushy eyebrows.

"Leave me alone!" Snapped Quana while trying hard to not imagine what horrors Kasimar could do to her if he got the chance.

The heat began to gradually build up; at first it was just like the temperature of a pleasantly warm bath. But it didn't last for long; in just minute the temperature was very high and was singing the contestants in a tender area…

"Yowch!" Screamed Quana in great pain.

"This feels … kinda itchy." Giggled Uzuri.

"Yo ho hoooooooo!" Wailed Barney. "Mother of mermaid, fire on the poop deck!"

Raven and Jimmy watched this from the sidelines looking horrified. Jimmy really didn't want to watch … and yet he could not look away. Raven was covering her eyes and looked away.

"Oh man; this is just wrong." Said Jimmy in shock. "Isn't torture illegal?"

"It is … but Chris can do this because we signed the contracts." Mumbled Raven.

"I had my friend Charles read mine as he's really smart … he didn't find anything nasty in it."

"Well … they say that signing them means we will take part in every challenge without any exceptions." Explained Raven. "I'm starting to wonder if going on this show was a good idea."

"I just came for fun and to make friends and I've managed that so far." Said Jimmy. "So … Raven is it? Don't you usually stutter?"

"Most of the time yes." Nodded Raven.

"So why aren't you stuttering now?" Asked Jimmy as he started to get his hair back in its normal position.

"I'm not nervous around you." Smiled Raven. "I'm generally ok with people younger than me."

"Yep; I'm fairly well liked back home." Nodded Jimmy. "Oh boy; I think the heat is getting higher."

And indeed it was; the others were yelling and wailing in pain. Eleanor looked like she was going to cry as it was so painful. Andy was gritting his teeth and humming the theme tune to space invaders to try and ignore the pain.

"Uncle!" Yelled Zita.

Her bindings unfastened and she quickly got out and flipped Chris the bird.

"You're a maniac Chris Maclean!" Snarled Zita. "You give humanity a bad name and you're ugly!"

Zita stormed away to the cabins while Chris looked shocked. After a moment he growled and raised the remote.

"Ok; because of what Zita just said I'm going to turn the heat up to maximum." Said Chris as he began to have a strop. "Nobody insults me because I'm Chris Maclean; the most awesome guy there is. People only watch the show because of me!"

Chris pressed another button on his remote and the heat intensified. Some of the contestants screamed for a moment.

"Uncle!" Wailed Eleanor.

Eleanor was released and rubbed her backside while she shuddered in pain.

"Are you ok?" Asked Jimmy in concern.

"I'll be ok." Nodded Eleanor. "But that was horrible! I don't care if we're losing; I'm just relieved that I'm not getting tortured anymore."

"I know how you feel." Agreed Jimmy. "The electrocution was nasty."

"This challenge is just not right." Said Raven. "Is there anything Chris won't do?"

"Well … look at the bright side; Kasimar is getting what he deserves." Said Jimmy as he gestured to Kasimar. The bully was in extreme pain and his eyes were watering. "But then again … is it really right to laugh at somebody's misery?"

"Normally no; but I think Kasimar very much deserves this." Said Eleanor as he smirked at the bully. "And you saw what he did to Quana. I think this should teach him a lesson."

* * *

**Confessional- No lessons because it's the summer!**

**Eleanor: I don't really hold grudges … but I don't think Kasimar has done a nice thing in all the competition. He actually threatened me when he arrived. With luck he'll get voted off.**

**Raven: This challenge is nuts; I just don't see what is so funny about people suffering. Also; where did Zita go?**

* * *

Zita was sitting on her bed in the girl's side of the Team Puzzle cabin. She was looking through the things in her loot sack. So far she had a light bulb, some flowers, and a number of different types of silverware, some of Chris's hair gel … and some of her friend's possessions.

"Looks like I've done pretty well so far." Smiled Zita to herself as she looked over her loot before frowning to herself. "I know it's not right, but I must. And yet … I feel like I'm missing something."

Zita looked around the room; Frost and Dandelion the ferrets were curled up asleep in there cage. Zita paid them no attention as she wouldn't steal a living thing. Her gaze continued wandering around until it landed on the cupboard by Quana's bed.

Sitting on the cupboard was a microphone and it looked in very good quality. Zita suddenly felt a tightening in her gut.

"No; fight it Zita." Said Zita to herself though the lump in her gut became quite uncomfortable indeed.

Zita let out a sigh and walked over to the microphone.

"Sorry guys." Mumbled Zita as she inspected the microphone closer.

It was colored metallic orange and had the name Quana engraved into it. It was in mint condition and looked quite expensive.

"Stupid OCD." Sighed Zita to herself as she stuffed the microphone into her loot sack and with her sack over her shoulder she left the cabin.

* * *

**Confessional: I once stole a one liner.**

**Zita: I have two main problems, one is my OCD; the other is how much I like money and possessions, I'm a bit of a hoarder. I just hope the others see it that way if they catch me. Still … there's no guarantee they will … right?**

* * *

The torture challenge was still ongoing; Jimmy, Eleanor and Raven were still watching and cheering their teams on, but it wasn't stopping the immense pain though. Chris looked to be getting bored.

"Ok; I think I've had enough of the flame, none of you are screaming anymore!" Whined Chris as he turned off the heat. "Maybe I can put some spin in your step!

"Isn't the phrase spin in your step?" Asked Lavender as she groaned in pain. A cheerleaders skirt didn't offer much protection against heated metal.

"Who cares ginger?" Sneered Chris. "Anyone want to call it quits?"

"Uncle!" Groaned Irene. "I can't take it anymore!"

Irene was released and she hobbled off. As she did Quana also decided she'd had enough, her behind hurt too much.

"Uncle!" Said Quana in great pain as she was released.

As the pretty tanned singer got up and limped back to her cabin Kasimar laughed at her.

"Awww; has the wimpy girl had enough? What a wuss! With endurance like that you'll be making your living on the corners! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar snidely while everyone glared at him.

Quana gave Kasimar a look of hatred as a tear exited her eye.

Spider noticed Quana's sadness and felt an urge to hurt Kasimar badly. The bully just laughed as Spider's crush sadly limped off. Spider snarled; he was almost never angry but when someone he really cared about was being bullied he tended to go bananas.

"Bide your time Spider." Whispered Barney. "He'll get what's coming to him one way or another … why not try outsmarting him?"

Spider calmed down and thought for a moment. Suddenly he had an idea and smiled.

"Hey Chris; Kasimar said *cough* the U word!" Called Spider.

"I didn't say 'uncle' you sick rat!" Snarled Kasimar.

"And Kasimar is out." Said Chris. "I would have thought a bully would have lasted longer."

"What?" Asked Kasimar with a snarl. "But I didn't mean it!"

"I have to count it the first time you say it." Shrugged Chris. "I'll let you out."

Chris pressed a button on his complex remote but Kasimar's bindings didn't budge, they appeared to be stuck.

"What's going on?" Asked Kasimar in annoyance.

"Err … it seems that your bindings are jammed; I can't let you out so you'll have to put up with the pain until the end of the challenge … and it won't count." Smirked Chris. He may have liked Kasimar but he still was a sadist.

Kasimar paled and looked horrified. Everyone else however looked very amused.

* * *

**Confessional- Big Bad Bully gets a Big Bad Bashing!**

**Kasimar: **(He looks really banged up with several bruises and injuries). **When I win the money I'm going to get a lawyer so I can sue Chris; that way I can get even more money! Oh this hurts. That sick stillbirth abomination is DEAD!**

**Spider: Sometimes everything turns ***cough* **out alright. I'm ***cough* **no sadist but I found it very fulfilling to ***sneeze* **hear and see Kasimar in pain. He deserves it! **(Spider smiles but suddenly looks afraid). **Oh no … he's gonna ***gag* **want to kill me!**

**Barney: Yeah! Go Spider! It's about time somebody taught that bully a lesson. If his team loses it's pretty given that he's going. Spider sure is becoming a Papa Wolf towards Quana … makes me wish I have a girlfriend. I mean, I could get one … but I'm waiting for the right person.**

**Uzuri: Kasimar didn't need to scream like that, pain isn't so bad! Then again I don't really feel pain the same way as most people … I'm kinda autistic. **

**Eleanor: Serves him right! I doubt there is even one person who feels sorry for him, raise your hand if you were glad that happened.**

* * *

"Ok then; time for some dizziness; it'll be spin city!" Chuckled Chris as he pressed another button and the chairs began to spin.

"Bad pun alert, bad pun alert, bad pun alert yaaar!" Yelled Barney as the chairs began to spin faster and faster.

"I don't like this!" Said Lavender as she began to get really dizzy. "I never did like the merry-go-round at the fair when I was young."

"I've heard of going out for a spin but this is ridiculous!" Groaned Gary as he began to feel sickly as his vision became blurry.

"Make it stop!" Wailed Kasimar as he struggled against his jammed bindings; they didn't budge and Kasimar was getting woozy.

Chris turned a dial on his remote and the chairs became a spinning blur; kind of like a pint sized tornado. He chuckled as he surveyed the mayhem.

"Isn't this awesome?" Smirked Chris to himself.

"You're a sadist!" Said Irene is disgust. "You actually find this funny?"

"Yes; yes I do." Chuckled Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Dizzy dazzle.**

**Irene: I am appalled at Chris; usually I'm calm and fun loving … but he's really pressing my buttons! I hope he'll end up regretting all this bad stuff he does.**

* * *

"Anybody want to call it quits?" Asked Chris.

"Uncle!" Yelled Mable in a sickly tone.

Chris released her and she flew from her seat and onto the ground with some force.

"Haha! I knew that would be funny!" Laughed Chris sadistically

"Are you crazy?" Asked Mable angrily. "That could have really hurt me!"

"That's what makes it funny." Replied Chris.

Mable stared at Chris for a moment before growling at him.

"Your fat!" Snapped Mable as she left for the mess hall angrily.

Chris gasped in horror at what she had just said and subconsciously looked down on himself to check he wasn't fat. He seemed satisfied with what he saw and turned the chair's spinning speed to maximum.

"I'm gonna be sick!" Groaned Spider as bile started to rise in his throat; he forcefully swallowed and groaned again.

"Wheeeeeeeee!" Cheered Uzuri while grinning huge. "This is like the fun fair back home!"

"Uncle!" Yelled Wallace.

Like Mable before him Wallace was thrown onto the ground. He got up and dusted his leather jacket off.

"With my right hand man stuck in the chair it looks like it's time for some solo evil." Chuckled Wallace to himself. "Mwahahahahahaha!"

Wallace shrugged off any remaining discomfort and sped off to his cabin for his latest evil deed.

"This is getting boring." Said Chris with a yawn. "I think we'll move on to something else."

Chris pressed a button on the remote and the chairs slowly stopped spinning and the campers looked dizzy and woozy.

"Ooooooh." Groaned Kasimar. "This isn't fair."

Kasimar gagged and then puked all over his shirt and as he was stuck in his chair he couldn't get up and clean it off. It was in short very deserved.

"This … bites." Said Kasimar groggily as his eyes swirled and left him unable to see straight.

* * *

**Confessional- I have a feeling his karma won't stop there!**

**Lavender: Sometimes life really is worth the hardships; seeing Kasimar like that was gross … and yet very fulfilling.**

**Mable: Chris is as ugly as his personality and I think his hair is dumb. I'm not Nakia but I think my hair is stylish.**

**Chris: Stylish my ass! I'm the most stylish, I'm Chris Maclean! I'm the guy everyone wishes they could be and I don't blame them because I'm awesome.**

**Andy: I really think Chris should get some serious help. This is going to give us permanent injuries if we aren't careful. I was ok as I have a high tolerance for pain, but the cries and screams of my friends were really haunting.**

* * *

Wallace was in his cabin with his suitcase open next to him. He was rooting through his 'evil gadgets' and seemed to be looking for something.

"Where is it?" Grumbled Wallace. "This is why I should sort things alphabetically instead of how evil they are. Aha! There it is!"

He pulled out a weird looking gun; it was colored yellow and purple and looked very complex. Wallace began adjusting the settings.

"Let's see; if I'm going to win I need to sabotage the competition; I think I'll do both opposing teams, that way it's fair." Said Wallace to himself as the gun made a beep sound. "Ok; onward to evil! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

Wallace closed his suitcase and slid it back under his bed. With his weird looking gun equipped the over the top villain left the cabin and back to the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional- Mwuhahahahahaha! I can laugh evilly too you see.**

**Wallace: **(He is presenting the gun to the camera). **I call this evil beauty the Hacker Tether. It's quite simple really; most if not all electrical appliances have a special skart socket at the back, with the right evil technology such as what I hold here you can hack into those things and remotely control them. Great for cheating AND taking over the world. I'm wagering the chairs have one as well so it's time to cause some mayhem! Mwuhahahahahaha!**

* * *

Wallace was quick on his feet and snuck silently around the torture challenge still going on and hid in the bushes. He lowered his sunglasses a little to get a perfectly crystal clear view on his targets. The seats were generating electricity once more and it looked quite painful. Wallace was lucky to have the foresight Chris would be back to previous tortures as electricity was painful and he wasn't too original unlike most villains.

Wallace lay down and aimed the gun carefully as he raised the aiming receptacle. He scanned the chairs and came to Gary's chair.

"Prepare for a little pain little chef." Chuckled Wallace as he locked on and pulled the trigger.

A small zap of electricity burst from Wallace's gadget and hit the chair. Wallace began pressing a few buttons on the side on the gun so the fun could really begin.

Gary was managing to withstand the electrocution fairly well; it was painful indeed but he just thought about how great it would be to win the challenge for his team.

"This isn't so bad." Said Gary as he gritted his teeth from the electric buzz in his bones.

Wallace chuckled from his hiding place.

"The forbidden words." Smirked Wallace as he pressed a red button on his gadget.

Instantly the electricity shocking Gary increased tenfold … and it was already near maximum.

"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeowtch!" Screamed Gary as he spasmed a little and his hair stood on end.

"Would you look at that?" Chuckled Chris. "The chef is as crispy as his food! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

Everyone looked from there seats over to Gary; he looked in great pain and his chair seemed to be emitting a stronger shock than the others. If they had strained their ears they would have heard soft manical laughter coming from the bushes.

"Uncle!" Yelled Gary as he couldn't take the immense pain any longer.

Chris released Gary. Gary hobbled out of the chair though electricity buzzed through him briefly every few seconds.

"Wow; did you order well done or extra crispy?" Joked Chris.

"Bad pun alert, bad pun alert, bad pun alert!" Yelled Barney.

Barney was right; not only did the joke suck but this wasn't something to laugh about. Gary had been shocked so badly that he had become crispy and blackened all over; his hair was a mess as well.

"Hey Chris; do –bzzzt- you have any –bzzzt- ointment for this?" Asked Gary while clutching his sore sides.

"Nope; and even if I did I wouldn't give it to you because you're a flat, boring and girly contestant while I'm the almighty Chris Maclean!"

Gary looked blank for a moment before looking angry and marching over to Chris, albeit somewhat haphazardly due to buzzes of electricity. He stopped before Chris and have him an angry look.

"Hey Chris."

"What is it fem boy?" Asked Chris with a smirk

"Think fast!"

BAM!

Gary punched Chris in the gut and stormed away to his cabin. Despite being electrified everyone laughed at Chris's misfortune and some cheered for Gary.

Chris coughed and gagged for a moment before he snarled at everyone for laughing at him.

"You think that's funny? I'll show you what's funny!" Snapped Chris.

* * *

**Confessional- The old one two buckle my shoe!**

**Gary: I wasn't lying when I said I was strong. It's thanks to boxing lessons.**

**Vinnie: **(He is clapping and looks pleased).** You go buddy!**

**Raven: Wow; Gary is r-really strong; he put Chris in his p-place. What a guy.**

**Oscar: Serves Chris right. He can torture us but he can't take it himself … pretty weenie.**

**Xaria: That was kinda funny; Chris has had that coming for a long time. Wish we could do a team trade; then we could be rid of Kasimar.**

**Eleanor: I always comfort those who are upset … but I won't be comforting Chris, he's so mean. I have no shame in calling him nasty.**

**Tabitha: Hmmm … not bad; but I still don't think Gary is strong, it's Chris he hit and we all know Chris is a wimp.**

**Chris: Why do all these people hate me? They should be bowing down to me as their god because I'm that awesome. They're all just useless minor characters.**

* * *

Chris pressed the remote once again and out from the side of each and every single chair came a baseball bat. They were shiny and looked solid. Thankfully Chris seemed to have shown a little humility by adjusting them so they hit the victims in the gut rather than the skull.

Xaria looked at the baseball bat and images of the beatings her sister began to enter her head. She couldn't go through that; not again.

"Uncle!" Yelled Xaria; she was released and quickly got out of the chair and left.

"You call yourself tough? What a little crybaby!" Laughed Kasimar.

"Where do you get off calling her a coward; you're the one who picks on children, that's a sign you're the real coward here!" Growled Oscar. "Oh; and your shirt's a little messy."

"Shut up douche nozzle!" Snarled Kasimar. "And stop calling me a coward; that's a low insult!"

"It isn't an insult if it's the truth!" Replied Oscar smugly.

"At least I don't use steroids!" Shot Kasimar.

"I don't use those; they're for losers like you!" Said Oscar irritably.

"Ok campers; it's time to make a home run!" Laughed Chris.

"Bad pun alert, bad pun alert, bad pun alert!" Yelled Barney once more.

"It wasn't a bad pun; it was funny because I said it!" Snapped Chris.

Chris pressed his remote and the bats began to swing at the campers gut areas; it was really painful. Chris just laughed while the campers yelped and groaned in pain.

* * *

**Confessional- Home run in the ball park!**

**Xaria: Thank goodness I quit before that happened; I couldn't go through that, not again. **(She lowers her head and sighs).

**Oscar: I wonder why Xaria quit; I don't blame her at all really, those baseball bats were really hard hitting. But the look in her eyes … it didn't look like normal fear. Hmmmm.**

**Barney: This is precisely the reason I didn't join the baseball team back home; getting hit by a peg leggedly hard hitting bat really hurts, particularly on your sea legs when you try to stand after it. Yaaaaar, it got worse.**

**Lavender: **(She looks a little banged up and she is clutching her side in pain). **When I signed up for this show I knew it wasn't going to be easy. I expected trials, nasty people and a true test of my abilities … I did NOT expect to be bludgeoned by a baseball bat! I hope everyone else is ok; not Kasimar though, he deserves this. I wonder if Barney could stand this as easily as the phobia challenge.**

* * *

Wallace winced at the screams of pain some of the contestants made; he may have been a cold hearted villain but he wouldn't torture his victims. Still; this was pretty evil. He aimed his Hacker Tether again and looked amongst the seats. His eyes landed on Spider.

"Hmmm; he's sick so I'll have to adjust me cheating method." Mumbled Wallace as he fired his gadget again.

It hit Spider's chair though he didn't notice as he was a _bit_ preoccupied with the baseball bat.

"This, OW, is completely OW *cough* crazy!" Yelled Spider between cries of pain and coughs of sickness.

Wallace pressed a button on his gun and instantly the bindings holding Spider sprung open and he was thrown out of the chair and onto the ground.

"Spider is out of the challenge!" Announced Chris.

"But I didn't say *sneeze* the U word." Said Spider.

"Not my problem!" Laughed Chris. "You're out all the same … and do you really want to get beaten by a baseball bat anyway?"

Spider saw there was no point in arguing and began to walk away.

"I wonder, YOWCH, how Quana is doing, OWWW!" Said Barney loudly between hits.

Spider instantly got the message and began to head towards the mess hall; hopefully Barney's advice would pay off this time.

* * *

**Confessional- (Insert bad baseball pun here)**

**Wallace: I may be evil, no doubt abut it but there are a few things I won't do. I wasn't going to make the bat hit Spider harder, he's sick! You can only hurt a sick person so much before it becomes truly bad. There's evil … and then there is dead unicorn evil.**

**Spider: Chris must have ***cough* **wired up the chair wrong. How else** *sneeze* **could it have done that? All the same; I'm kind of ***cough* **relieved to be out … I may ***gag*** need some band aids.**

**Barney: Dating tip number sixteen. Comforting a girl is a very delicate procedure, kind of like parachuting. You have to say the right things and make them feel better while at the same time not making it obvious you're flirting and also not making them feel weak. But I have confidence in my student's abilities.**

* * *

Quana was sitting in the mess hall; to be precise she was in the mess hall sitting on a large block of ice. She groaned in pain, this had been a pretty bad day. The challenge was mental and now she had Kasimar leering at her.

"You ok Quana?" Asked Mable in concern for Quana as she looked pretty injured. "Those flames were nasty. Though the look on Chris's face when I called him fat was very satisfying."

"I would have liked to have seen that." Said Quana with a somewhat forced smile as she would have rather hissed in pain. "I hope the next challenge isn't too bad."

"I wouldn't hope too hard." Sighed Mable. "It's probably going to involve lava or liquid nitrogen. Hopefully Kasimar will get hurt some more."

Quana growled upon hearing the violent bull's name. Mable noticed this and guessed it was about what had happened earlier.

"You're not the only one who dislikes that jerk; besides Wallace he has no friends." Said Mable. "If he tried to touch me I would break him like a tangled up slinky."

"I know; why does he do what he does? Does Kasimar show no remorse or compassion? What kind of parents raised that monster?" Asked Quana in increasing anger before taking a deep breath and looking uncomfortable. "And he slapped my ass! Not only was it horrifying and wrong … but it sorta hurt."

"But you did kick him in the crotch." Smirked Mable. "You have my full support in this Quana; someway, somehow. He. Will. Go. DOWN!"

Mable arose from her seat and walked to the door of the mess hall.

"I'll see you later Quana; I'm gonna take a lie down, maybe some rest will make me less sore." Said Mable as she left out the door.

As Mable left Spider entered. He spotted Quana sitting on the ice and made his way over.

"Hi Quana, are you *cough* ok?" Asked Spider.

"Hello Spider; I'm not really ok. I'm having a pretty bad day so far." Said Quana with a sigh. "Not only am I really in pain but I now the attention of a sadistic bully's affections. It's people like him that make me prefer to stay single."

"Do you want me to *cough* beat up Kasimar?" Offered Spider.

Quana chuckled and smiled at Spider.

"Thanks for the offer … but you're not exactly a powerhouse and I don't want him to hurt you." Said Quana sweetly. "Still; I wouldn't mind seeing him in pain."

"Then you're in luck; I tricked *sneeze* Kasimar into saying Uncle and not only *splutter* is he out but he's stuck in his seat." Chuckled Spider with a sick sniffle. "He's getting tortured for no *cough* gain until the challenge is over."

Quana eyes widened and she smiled widely and began to laugh; a laugh that made Spider's stomach flutter in a none illness related way.

"Really? Oh boy, I've got to see this!"

Quana began to get off the ice and instantly her face contorted in pain.

"On second thoughts I'd better stay here; my tooshy kinda hurts from all the fire. I may have a full body tan but I'm really sensitive to burns." Said Quana regretfully. "Why don't you go and watch him suffer?"

"I would … but I'd rather make sure *cough* you're ok. You see; I don't like it when my friends are in pain or upset."

"You really value friendship don't you Spider." Smiled Quana.

"Very much. I may not have *cough* many friends but the few I have I *cough* care for very greatly." Said Spider. "If only I was as popular as you."

"Being popular isn't all perfect you know." Said Quana. "You are expected to hang out with the other populars; most of them are pretty mean, kind of like Nakia."

"I don't like Nakia. She bullied me and Jimmy. And she swore revenge on me." Gulped Spider. "She scares me."

"Don't be scared Spider; she's too stupid to do anything more complicated than brushing her hair." Comforted Quana. "So … is our team winning?"

"So far myself, Jimmy, Eleanor, *cough* Zita and you are out … so we're *cough* losing."

"Oh dear." Gulped Quana. "At least if any of us are voted out we won't have been the first voted off."

"True; but I have faith in *sneeze* Barney and Andy." Said Spider.

* * *

**Confessional- Faith in a pirate; that's new.**

**Mable: I called Chris fat because in my opinion that's the worst insult of all. I personally hate being called fat. Though that doughnut two days ago was pretty tasty.**

**Quana: I wonder why Spider was being so nice. I think it's because he cares about all his friends. It was nice to have someone to talk to. I think in the future I'll keep my distance from Kasimar. He's nothing short of a vile, sadistic, wretched bully. What was Chris thinking?**

**Chris: I wanted him to hurt people and bring up ratings, it's not rocket science girl!**

* * *

The baseball bats finally stopped hitting the campers and Tabitha and Lavender couldn't take anymore. Both had cried uncle and were released and eliminated. As they were released the bats were shut off and stopped whacking the remaining campers.

"So this is how Squidward feels?" Asked Lavender out loud in pain.

"I love that show!" Smiled Barney from his seat. "My favorite character is Patchy the Pirate. He's an example of what pirating is all about!"

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me." Chuckled Lavender.

Tabitha limped over to a log and sat down. She was in pain though felt content. If they lost then it was unlikely she would go as she had lasted a fair while. And also there was the fact they had Uzuri.

All through the challenge Uzuri had just laughed, giggled or been excited by all the pain and torture. She was a complete masochist. She may be a complete freak in Tabitha's pinion … but it was reasons like this she was glad she kept Uzuri over Yessica.

"How are you holding up you two?" Called Tabitha to Vinnie and Uzuri.

"I'm fine; this is so much fun! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as she relaxed in her seat.

"I feel like I've been crushed by an ice cream truck." Groaned Vinnie.

"Just keep going; I won't hold it against you if you can't go on." Said Tabitha to encourage her team.

* * *

**Confessional- Hidden motives of the mind.**

**Tabitha: I wouldn't hold it against them because it's not their fault if we lose; it'll be whoever did the worst, in this case Irene. Still; I'm rightfully confident Uzuri can win this. I don't have as much faith in Vinnie, but he can try if he wants, he could surprise me.**

**Uzuri: I may be really strange and more than a little odd … but in a pain challenge it's no problem to me! While someone normal, like Tabitha, would be hurt and scream about pain, when pain happens to me it creates a pleasant light tickling sensation! Sometimes it's a good omen not to fit in with the crowd. Teehee!**

* * *

"Alrighty then!" Said Chris with a clap of his hands. "I think it's time we combine the tortures a little bit. Time to put a zap in your spin!"

"Wannabe pun alert, wannabe pun alert, wannabe pun alert yaaaar!" Yelled Barney while the others chuckled.

"Shut up! Every joke I make is funny; you're just jealous of me!" Snapped Chris as he stomped his feet like a child at the mall not getting sweets. "Prepare for torture!"

"No! Let me out!" Wailed Kasimar in panic. "I can't take it anymore!"

"Karma's a bitch huh Kasimar?" Smirked Lavender.

"Shut up you soulless ginger!" Snarled Kasimar before he screamed in pain from the electrocution as all the chairs began to spin.

"I can't take much more of this. Yo ho hoooooooooo!" Yelled Barney as his long blond hair stood on end.

"Wheeeeeeeee! This should be a ride at the fun fair!" Giggled Uzuri much to everyone else's surprise.

"Something must be wrong with these things." Said Chris in frustration as he shook the remote. "Why isn't that little freak not screaming?"

"OI! Don't call her a freak you dirty rat!" Snarled Vinnie while temporarily ignoring the pain. "So what if she's different; everyone has differences!"

"Go Vinnie, OW, go Vinnie!" Whooped Barney.

"YOWCHIE, show that narcissist who's, OWCH, boss!" Cheered Andy.

Chris just glared with the power of the death star.

* * *

**Confessional- Standing up to the oppressor in the face of pain.**

**Vinnie: **I **don't know what came over me. I just don't like it when someone is insulted and bullied for being different; I've had a lot of that. And Uzuri is my friend so that makes me angry.**

**Andy: That was a nice thing of Vinnie to do; Chris was going to far when he called Uzuri a freak; she may be unusual but like Vinnie says; everyone has differences. Chris's difference is that he's way more prideful than any human should be to the power of infinity and beyond!**

**Chris: Shut up! Nobody is allowed to insult me because on this island I am god!**

* * *

Quana had finally rid herself of the pain in her toosh and was walking back to her cabin; she needed a sit down on something that wasn't ice. Her bed would suffice very nicely. As she entered the cabin she looked towards her microphone by force of habit … only it wasn't there.

"What the? That's odd; maybe it fell onto the floor and under a bed.

Quana got down on all fours and looked under the bunk beds but there was no sign of her microphone. She looked all over the cabin but it was not there. It had vanished.

"Where is it?" Yelled Quana in franticness. Spider ran up to the door a few seconds later looking worried.

"Are you ok *cough* Quana?" Asked Spider in worry. "Did you hurt yourself?"

"No; I lost my microphone, it isn't where I left it." Said Quana as she began to breathe quickly. "It means so much to me."

"How long have you *cough* had it?" Asked spider. "Waa it a present for your first birthday?"

"No; it was a special prize from the first singing competition I ever won." Said Quana sadly. "I take it with me everywhere; it's my lucky charm."

Spider took out his inhaler and breathed with it for a moment before pocketing it and coughing.

"I'll help you find it; I'll just *cough* have a pain killer because I *cough* don't feel too good." Said Spider as he entered his own cabin.

Quana sat down on her bed and thought back to the day she first won that microphone; how happy she had been and how proud her family was. It had been specially engraved with her name as a bonus. If it was gone and she never got it back it would be like leaving part of herself behind.

"You're not the only *cough* one who's lost *cough* something." Said Spider in equal worry as he came back. "All my medication is gone!"

"What?" Said Quana in shock. "But that's awful! You need that to fight your illnesses!"

"Who could have *cough* done this heinousness?" Asked Spider. "I'd bet Kasimar *cough* but he's still getting deservedly *sneeze* tortured."

"Could it be Zita?" Asked Quana as she thought for a moment. "She does steal things."

"I really don't think she *hard cough* would steal from her friends." Said Spider. "I think we should get *sneeze* Jimmy and Eleanor to help us look for our *cough* belongings."

"Good idea; we can rely on them." Smiled Quana lightly despite her sadness.

* * *

**Confessional: Stealing victory from the jaws of defeat!**

**Quana: It was nice of Spider to help me; and why would somebody want to steal medication? That's unjust! **(Quana sighs and looks sad). **I'd sing a song to make myself happier but I just don't feel like I can do it.**

**Spider: Oh dear; this is ***cough* _**not**_** good! I'll be in real trouble if ***sneeze* **I don't take my medication. At least I still have my ***big sneeze*** inhaler. And poor Quana; seeing her ***cough* **upset really saddens me.**

**Zita: You ever get the feeling you're gonna regret something? I feel that now. I didn't want to steal the stuff but I couldn't stop myself. I'm sorry everyone; it's just who I am.**

* * *

"Uncle!" Yelled Vinnie as the pain became too much.

He was released and flew from his chair and onto the ground. He picked himself up and glared at Chris.

"You could have stopped the spinning before you ejected me!" Snarled Vinnie.

"What's the fun in that?" Laughed Chris.

Vinnie just growled and sat on a log next to Tabitha to cheer on Uzuri.

"Yo ho OWCH! I can't go no me heartie. I'm promoting you to captain of the operation Andy!" Said Barney in agony. His hair was sticking up in odd angles and would have looked funny if not for the pain Barney was in. "Uncle!"

Because of the speed the chair was spinning Barney flew up into the air at quite a speed. However; against all odds he landed on his feet without injury.

"You can do it Andy!" Cheered Barney. "Just pretend you're in zero gravity!"

"How is that gonna, OWCH, help me?" Asked Andy as he span around and around.

"I thought you loved space; just trying to help!" Smiled Barney.

"I think we should bring this to the next level … sudden death!" Yelled Chris dramatically. "It's time to put a spring in your step!"

Chris pressed the final button on his remote and the chairs began bouncing up and down while spinning and zapping the last three in the game.

"Do I even need to say it?" Asked Barney.

"No you don't!" snapped Chris. "Just let me enjoy the suffering!"

* * *

**Confessional- I need more funny one liners.**

**Barney: I felt pity for Andy yaaar. He's really giving it his all; but look who he was up against! Oscar and Uzuri. Oscar is seriously strong and resilient as a kraken … and Uzuri; well, she seems to have an odd sense of what's painful. But I have faith in him!**

**Xaria: the challenge was disgraceful … but it was good that Kasimar had to suffer for no gain at all. Maybe karma does exist. Poor Oscar; up against Uzuri, he really had a tough challenge.**

**Oscar: This challenge was pretty insane; but it put me to the test and I think I got a good grade. It could have been much worse than it was; at least Chris didn't use a chainsaw.**

**Chris: Darn! If only I had thought of that!**

* * *

Jimmy ran up looking worried and tapped Barney on the back to get his attention.

"Ahoy Jimmy me cabin boy; need something?" Asked Barney before noticing how worried Jimmy looked. "£Is something wrong?"

"Yes! Come with me; I'll explain everything!"

Jimmy ran off and Barney followed him. Andy saw them go while spinning and bouncing and sighed.

"There goes my support." Mumbled Andy. "But I'll win this!"

* * *

**Confessional- Space man landing on planet victory!**

**Andy: I wonder why Barney left; he probably had a pretty good reason. But the challenge was getting crazier and crazier. I question Chris's sanity.**

* * *

Jimmy and Barney arrived back at the cabins and to the door of the girl's cabin. Quana sat on the bed looking upset.

"Is something wrong me black and yellow haired sea lassie?" Asked Barney.

"Yes; my microphone had disappeared." Said Quana sadly. "It's mu most prized possession!"

"My medication is gone as well!" Said Spider. "And if I don't get it soon I could be in real trouble."

"I'll go and check our side of the cabin for the medication. I have an eye for these things yaaar!" Said Barney as he ran to the boy's part of the Team Puzzle cabin.

"Don't worry Quana." Comforted Eleanor. "I'm sure it'll turn up; lost things always do. If you like you can stroke my ferrets."

"Thanks Eleanor; but no thanks; I just don't feel like it. Also; you're lucky Frost and Dandelion weren't stolen." Said Quana with a small smile.

"You're right; I don't know what I'd do without them."

"Ok; now it's serious!" said Barney as he came back into view; and he looked angry, something he hadn't been all competition so far.

"What is it?" Asked Jimmy.

"Someone's nicked my favorite pirate comic book!" Snarled Barney. "It was a collector's edition copy of 'Captain Slag and the Glade of dreams'!"

Barney; you're scary when you're mad." Said Jimmy nervously.

"Sorry me heartie" said Barney as he calmed down a little. "But I don't like it when stuff has been stolen, especially when it's mine! Yaaar! This is frustrating!"

"I guess Andy is still in the challenge then." Guessed Jimmy.

"He is; and boy can that first mate take pain. Currently the deck swabbing chairs are spinning, bouncing and electrocuting the last three.

"Who is Andy up against?" Asked Eleanor. "Are they tough?"

"Sort of; he's going head to head to head with Uzuri and Oscar. And seriously me hearties, Uzuri is enjoying the pain."

"Err … go Andy!" Said Jimmy with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional: Spin shock on the bouncing chair!**

**Jimmy: I hope Andy can do this; I don't want to lose this early. And I may get a few votes; I was the first one out of the challenge. But I have a feeling, not sure what it is, but I have one.**

* * *

The chairs were going nuts; spinning, bouncing and zapping at the same time was hurting the final three in the challenge. Team Jungle cheered on Uzuri, Team Grenade cheered on Oscar. Andy had nobody cheering as none of his team were there. He however knew that if they were there then they would cheer.

Kasimar was stilling stuck in his chair and was in great pain; he would have quit long ago but he couldn't escape. What did he do to deserve this? Nothing in his opinion.

"Let me out!" Screamed Kasimar in pain as tears escaped his eyes. He wasn't crying but he sure was in a lot of pain.

"Yay! Faster!" Giggled Uzuri. "This is lovely!"

Oscar gritted his teeth; he couldn't keep this up, Uzuri was just too resilient … but maybe fate would smile upon him yet. He was feeling quite sick and though he could end it at any time he persisted in his challenge.

"Time to make this more interesting." Chuckled Chris as he set the voltage for maximum.

"OW!" Groaned Oscar.

"OWEY!" Yelped Andy.

"Teehee! My spine feels tickly!" Laughed Uzuri.

"I'm, OW, sorry; I can't, OW do it, OWWWWW, anymore!" Wailed Andy in pure pain. "Uncle!"

He was flung from his chair and landed in a heap on the ground. He got up slowly and held his head as the dizziness kicked in.

"Ooooooh; is this how Spider feels?" Asked Andy. "At least I did my best."

"Good job Andy." Smiled Oscar from his seat. "You did, OW, your best."

"Why, OW, are you, OW, being nice you, OW, retard?" asked Kasimar rudely.

"Because I'm a good sport." Replied Oscar.

Andy smiled and began to walk back to his cabin to deliver the news to his team.

* * *

**Confessional- The puzzle is confuzzled.**

**Andy: I may not have won; but hey, I gave it a go. And since I lasted the longest out of my team I think I'll be safe tonight. Too bad anyone has to go really.**

* * *

Zita was walking back to her cabin with her loot; she felt guilty. She wanted to return the stuff but if she did then not only would her team be angry but also she would get discomfort from her OCD.

"I need a lie down; maybe then I can think straight." Said Zita as she approached the cabin. When she did she gulped.

Just about all of her team were standing round it and looked either angry or upset. Zita instantly knew that they had discovered the disappearance of their stuff.

* * *

**Confessional: Caught like a fish on a hook.**

**Zita: Oh boy; this isn't going to end well.**

* * *

Zita calmed herself and clutched her loot sack tightly as she approached her team.

"Hey guys; what's going on?" Asked Zita calmly though inwardly worrying.

"A lot of bad stuff." Said Eleanor while she stood next to Quana.

"Like what? Did someone get hurt?" Said Zita as she pretended to be surprised and look worried.

"No; someone's stole some *cough* of our stuff." Said Spider. "My medication is *cough* gone! Without it I'm going to *sneeze* really suffer."

"You don't think I did it do you?" asked Zita calmly.

"I don't; to be *cough* honest none of us are sure." Said Spider sickly.

"And my microphone is gone." Said Quana sadly. "I've had it since I was seven."

"Oh no; who would do such a thing?" Said Zita while inwardly feeling terrible.

"I don't know … but, I just feel so upset. If I've lost it it'll be terrible, it means so much to me." Said Quana as a tear exited her eye.

Zita looked very guilty; it was time to come clean; this wasn't right.

"Quana; I-" Began Zita though she couldn't finish as Andy walked up.

"Hey guys … wow; there's a happy looking group." Said Andy sarcastically. "Is everything ok?"

"Not one little bit me heartie." Said Barney as he shook his head with his arms crossed. "There has been a theft, a thievery, a robbery. Somebody has stolen Spider's medication, Quana's microphone … and they stole my favorite comic book!"

"I hope whoever it was didn't steal anything of mine." Said Andy as he entered his side of the cabin.

"Do you think they did?" Asked Jimmy.

"I hope not; there's been a bit to much stealing lately." Said Barney.

"And they have." Said Andy as he exited the cabin. "The culprit has made off with my limited addition Star fox Airwing model! But … I have a solution."

Andy reached into his pocket and took out a tiny spaceship with a small button attached.

"This baby and the model are connected; I just press the button and the big one will emit a beep."

Zita panicked for a moment as Andy pressed the button. Instantly a loud beep sounded from within her loot sack.

"Is there something you want to tell us Zita?" Asked Andy.

"Zita … did you steal our stuff?" Asked Jimmy. "That's not really nice."

Zita gulped as the others either stared or glared at her and she sighed.

"I'm sorry guys; it's just … I have extreme OCD and I get urges. It's why I steal. I know I shouldn't of done it but I couldn't help myself."

"So you have all our missing possessions?" Asked Quana. "Can I please have my microphone back?"

Zita nodded and reached into the bag; she took out Quana's microphone, Barney's comic book, Andy's spaceship model and Spider's pills and handed them back to their owners.

"Oh thank goodness." Said Quana in relief. "I thought it was gone forever. You know; if you wanted to borrow it for a while I would have let you if you'd asked."

"I'm sorry; normally I show no remorse but I feel terrible." Said Zita.

"Say; Andy, if you're here then that means the challenge is over. Did we win?" Asked Eleanor hopefully.

"Well; the truth is that I." Began Andy before the intercom interrupted him.

"Attention everyone; we have a winner!" said Chris over the intercom. "Everyone report to camp center and I'll announce the winners; losers and the special prize!"

Team Puzzle was silent for a moment until Jimmy spoke up.

"Come on guys; cheer up. Andy didn't say we lost right?" Said Jimmy enthusiastically. "Let's go"

Jimmy ran off to camp center while the others slowly trudged after him.

* * *

**Confessional: Thief found out.**

**Zita: This isn't going to end well; I just hope we won.**

**Spider: I feel better now that ***cough* **I've had my medication. I'm also happy that Quana ***cough* **isn't sad anymore. It saddens me to see her cry.**

**Uzuri: This challenge was so much fun! I wish I could do it again!**

* * *

The three teams stood around camp center as Chris stood on a crate in front of them. He looked very pleased; his sadistic needs had been satisfied very well indeed.

"Well everyone; I have to say that this is not only the best challenge in the season so far … but it has been the best challenge is the whole history of Total Drama! It had everything in it; pain, torture, suffering and screams, haha! But in the end one person withstood it all. The winners of this challenge are…

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Team Jungle thanks to Uzuri!

Team Jungle cheered; they had come in first place for the first time. As the team congratulated Uzuri the strange girl just smiled and giggled.

"You did really good today Uzuri." Smiled Vinnie. "Don't listen to Chris, you're really talented!"

"Oh, it was nothing. Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

"If you're done with the congratulating, I have to announce the prize." Said Chris impatiently. "The first place prize this time is…

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…

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A free session of electroshock therapy!"

"What? That's a terrible prize!" Said Gary angrily.

"I thought you said it was a good prize!" Snapped Tabitha.

"About that … I lied!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"You're a very bad man." Said Irene angrily.

"Whatever girly." Said Chris rudely. "Anyway; the losers of this challenge and the ones who will be sending someone home are…

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Team Puzzle! Let's all point and laugh at them!"

"Ha haaaaa!" Laughed Kasimar. The bully had a vomit covered shirt and many bruises and injuries but was still able to laugh at somebody's misfortune. "Sucks to be you guys you losers!"

Oscar was standing next to Kasimar and punched him in the head; the bully was promptly knocked unconscious.

"Team Grenade; you guys get no prize but you are safe." Said Chris. "I'll meet team Puzzle at the bonfire ceremony in an hour; until then do whatever you want."

Before leaving Chris blew a raspberry at Team puzzle and then left laughing. The teams dispersed while Zita sighed.

"This could be it for me." She mumbled.

* * *

**Confessional: Or is it?**

**Zita: It was good while it lasted; but then again there is always hope. Hopefully it will be on my side.**

* * *

Mable felt pretty good; though her team hadn't come first they were safe from elimination once again and the prize was pretty crap anyway. Though this did mean they had to put up with Kasimar for longer, but he'd get his eventually.

"Hi Mable; good job in the challenge today." Said Andy as he walked up.

"Thanks Andy; I tried my best which is really all anybody can ask for." Smiled Mable. "And you did incredible; you nearly won. Oscar said uncle about thirty seconds after you left. But you just can't beat Uzuri at this type of thing it seems."

"She may be weird but I think she's ok." Agreed Andy. "In a way it would be good if your team had lost."

"Why's that?" Asked Mable.

"So Kasimar could get kicked off." Said Andy. "He deserves it."

"He's a complete monster alright; but it was pretty funny that he was stuck in his seat all the way through; that'll teach him a lesson."

"Somehow I doubt he'll learn anything from it though." Sighed Andy.

"He's a dick alright." Nodded Mable in full agreement. "You know; after all this I've only just realized how hungry I am. I could use a fruit salad."

"Oh yeah; I love those." Said Andy. "I especially love strawberries. I'll see you later as I need to cast my vote; if there's any fruit could you save me some?"

"Sure; no problem." Smiled Mable.

* * *

**Confessional- I don't eat fruit, I don't have a mouth!**

**Mable: Andy's really nice … and he actually respects my healthy eating. He could be a good ally if we both get to the merge.**

**Andy: That was pretty good; so me and Mable both like healthy food. Hmmm; though I'm confident in my own abilities perhaps Barney could give me some tips.**

**Barney: After what happened today there is only one person I can vote for; sorry Zita, I know you apologized and all that … but I'm sorry to say that I vote for you.**

**Zita: I bet I'm gonna go; though I must have faith. My vote goes to Jimmy; nothing personal but if I stay then he'll be the least use to the team.**

* * *

The sun had set and the moon was out and the stars shone and twinkled brightly. Team Puzzle sat around on stumps and logs at the Bonfire pit. Silence was in the air as the team felt a little depressed and disappointed that their suffering had been all for nothing.

Chris arrived with a tray of six marshmallows and stood by his oil drum like always. He set the tray down and picked up a marshmallow.

"Team Puzzle; you have lost the challenge and proved you are all weak little girls." Laughed Chris while the team looked angry. "You have cast your votes and one of you is going to be voted off in a few moments. When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. The person who does not get a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means that you are out … and you can't come back … *ever*."

"You're a dick yaaar." Said Barney as he sat on a stump with his head in his hands.

"I might be a dick but I rule you guys and don't you forget it? Haha!" Laughed Chris. "The first marshmallow of the night goes to Quana.

"Thanks for not voting me off guys." Smiled Quana as she got up from her log and took her marshmallow.

"We wouldn't have *cough* voted you off; we'd *sneeze* have to be insane to do that." Said spider with a smile. Barney gave spider a thumbs up.

"The next person going to the next round is … Andy."

Andy slowly stood up and lightly limped over to Chris. He collected his marshmallow and ate it.

"Barney"

"Eleanor"

"Spider"

The only two without marshmallows were Jimmy and Zita. Zita nodded to herself and hung her head while Jimmy bit his fingernails nervously and shook a little.

"This is the final marshmallow of the night. Whoever doesn't get this must get the hell off this island. It goes to…

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…

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…

Will you get on with it yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"Shush! I'm being dramatic." Said Chris in frustration.

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Jimmy."

Jimmy sighed in great relief and ran up to get his marshmallow. It tasted great but then again he loved any type of Candy.

Zita sat without a marshmallow in her seat and sighed.

"Well Zita; you're out and voted off eighth. It's what you get for stealing … and more importantly it's what you get for calling me ugly!" said Chris with a look of malice on his face.

Zita sighed and got up. Before she left she turned to her team.

"I understand guys; I don't blame you, I did steal your stuff … and, well … I'm sorry."

Zita pt her hands in her pockets and began to walk to the dock of shame when Jimmy ran up to her.

"Hey Zita; I just want to say no hard feelings. Even if you had stole from me I would have forgiven you in a heartbeat. I hope you have fun at the Playa Des losers."

Zita smiled and shook Jimmy's hand.

"Thanks Jimmy; you're a really nice guy."

Now feeling infinitely better Zita walked towards the dock of shame with her head held high.

"_Zita you may have stole and now you're getting coal. But without you are team won't be whole; goodbye and we'll miss you friend_." Sang Quana as the rest of the team applauded.

Zita smiled and waved to her team as she boarded the boat of losers and it sailed away into the night with her on it.

"What the hell?" Snapped Chris. "You should have been jeering at her and calling her cruel names! You should have hated her! You heard her; she stole your stuff!"

"I did hear that; but I also heard her say sorry. I was raised to forgive and forget, something you are incapable of doing." Said Jimmy bravely.

"The cabin boy is right; you're a complete dick!" Said Barney disapprovingly.

"Not cool." Said Eleanor as she and the others left the bonfire pit and left for bed.

Chris stood there in shock and began having a temper tantrum.

"They can't talk to me like that! I'm Chris Maclean! If it weren't for my contract I'd rig the votes on people I hate! Why can't they all be like the all time favorite Kasimar?"

Chris sighed angrily and calmed himself as he turned to the cameraman.

"Now; before I leave you to have my latté I ask you a few questions. Who will be the next person eliminated? Are lattés better with lots of sugar? Will spider ever admit he loves Quana, I hope not as he's a loser. And finally, will Uzuri continue to be a strong competitor? Find our next time on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

Votes

Andy- Zita

Barney- Zita

Eleanor- Zita

Jimmy- Zita

Quana- Zita

Spider- Zita

Zita- Jimmy

Zita- 6

Jimmy- 1

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita

And so Zita's stay on Camp Wawanakwa has ended. Sorry to all who liked her as I know some of you do … but it was her time; and she left on good terns didn't she? So it wasn't all bad.


	16. Day 8, Part 1, Like Squishing a Bug

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the 'Season that Must Never Be Named'. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. And let's not forget that I also do not own the alphabet theme; that was first created by Frank15 so thank you to him.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains bullying, worries, a few 'noodle incidents', cheating and a host having a temper tantrum. You have been warned. But it's nothing M rated so don't hide the kids.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable VinniexUzuri GaryxRaven and a secret couple.

**Note: **This chapter sees the return of an old favorite challenge from season 1. Some characters gain more development and a new conflict arises. Basically day 8 is going to be pretty good. Now before we start the show I'm going to answer some of the reviews.

**Frank15:** There is more to why Xaria's sister did that than what I've mentioned. Keep reading the story and you'll eventually find out. Kasimar's hatred of redheads is actually explained in this chapter, but to put it simply he's a prejudiced bastard. Oh; and the reason Zita felt remorse was because she hadn't stolen from friends before and seeing Quana's sadness made her sorry. I hope this answers your questions to a degree.

**Haters Go To Heaven:** Thanks for the big review. I'm glad you liked how Kasimar got hurt; he really deserves it. And he's going to get worse…

**Bad-Asp: **You're right; if Kasimar or Wallace had stolen the stuff then they wouldn't have returned it. They're evil!

Buckle your seatbelts because its gonna be a bumpy ride!

* * *

Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame once again. It was daytime on Wawanakwa and the native blood thirsty flesh eating sharks swam about in the water while Chris drank a latté. He finished drinking it and tossed the cup away into the water. He smiled and raised his hands dramatically.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was a challenge that would make Jigsaw envious as we tortured the campers to tears. People wept, behinds were sizzled and dizziness was abundant all around. Some campers like Jimmy and Raven didn't last long but they're complete wusses anyway so who cares right? Things began to pick up as the challenge continued; Quana quit like the wimp she is and Kasimar laughed at her and said some … 'stuff'. Spider didn't like this and tricked Kasimar into saying uncle. Sadly I had to count Kasimar as out. But due to bad luck Kasimar had chosen a chair that wasn't working right and thus was stuck and unable to get out. He looked pretty banged up later on."

Chris chuckled to himself and mumbled about loving seeing others in pain. He turned back to the camera and resumed his recap.

"While the challenge was going on Zita did a spot of stealing. Apparently it was to do with Obsessive Compulsion Disorders but I didn't care about that, I was angry that she called me ugly! She made off with Spider's medication, Barney's favorite comic book, Andy's spaceship model and, of course, Quana's microphone that is the singer's prized possession. Apparently she won it in a competition … but I didn't care about sappiness, I wanted to see tears! And see them I did."

Chris laughed and fake cried for a moment in mockery of Quana.

"The final three of the challenge was one for each team; muscle man Oscar, Andy the space fan and weird girl Uzuri. It seems Uzuri likes pain because she has a certain type of autism. Pity really; her tears would really make me happy. Haha! In the end though Andy said uncle first and Uzuri secured Team Jungles first place victory for the first time."

"But at about this time team Puzzle had noticed their belongings had been stolen; Barney was angry, Spider was worried and Quana was sad. Zita completely destroyed her thief reputation and was about to confess. Andy arrived and thanks to a remote connection between his model and a miniature button spaceship Zita was discovered. She handed back the loot but before anything else could be done I summoned everyone to camp center."

"At the Bonfire ceremony it came down to Jimmy and Zita. Unsurprisingly Zita was voted out five to one and had to walk the dock of shame. And something I still can't figure out is that the others bid her a nice farewell. What the hell? They should have made her cry! Oh well; you can't have everything even though someone as great as me should."

Chris flashed a grin for the audience and began to close the recap.

"Who will be voted out in this episode of Total Drama Letterz? Will Kasimar hit on Quana again? Will Barney get anymore popular with the fans? And do any of the campers have talent? Find out in this episode of Total Drama letterz!

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

Spider sat on a patch of grass with his knees drawn up. He was thinking about the competition so far. When he had arrived at the Island he had expected to be one of the first voted off. But he had proven himself wrong; he had several good friends and was doing quite well. Though he was hoping Kasimar would be gone soon as he would want revenge for the previous challenge. And there was another thing on his mind.

What was it? What else; Quana! She had been on his side since the first challenge and was perhaps one of the nicest, if not THE nicest, person he had ever met. He liked how she stood up to people without fear, was so nice and her singing was divine. Though she was very pretty as well, her tan skin and yellow streaks were very eye catching.

"_I wonder what my next love lesson will be_." Thought Spider to himself. He was jerked from his thoughts by the sound of cracking knuckles.

Spider looked behind him and paled more than usual; Kasimar was looking down on him with an evil gin on his face.

"Hello bug." Smirked Kasimar as he pounded his fist into his palm.

"Actually spiders *cough* are arachnids." Said Spider as he began backing away while still on the ground.

"Don't correct me bug; me and you need to have a little talk." Scowled Kasimar as he grabbed Spider by his shirt collar and pulled him to his feet.

"Is this about *cough* yesterday?" Asked Spider in flight fear of what the nasty bully would do to him.

"Yes; it is. You caused me a lot of unnecessary pain bug and I didn't like it, not one bit." Said Kasimar as he kept one hand holding onto Spider's collar. "I don't like it when people stand up to me; and you know what I do to people I don't like?"

Spider gulped as he looked into Kasimar's soul piercing eyes and began to shiver fearfully.

"Err … you kill *cough* them?" Whimpered Spider.

"No … I _destroy_ them." Sneered Kasimar as he tightened his grip on Spider. "I think me and you need to have a little talk about the rules."

"You care about *cough* rules?" Asked Spider as he tried to ignore the painful thumping of his heart.

"Only when they benefit me. Anyway; I'm big and you're small. That means I'm in charge as I could easily break your spine. Someone as worthless and weak as you is but a footstool for someone like me. Either you shape up or you ship out … in a body bag!" Snarled Kasimar.

Kasimar shoved Spider to the ground and placed one of his metal boots on the sick teen's chest.

"Just keep in mind that you won't be protected forever. Once the merge arrives some of your best friends will probably be gone, if you even get that far. And once you do … Yahaha!"

Kasimar increased the force of his boot and looked Spider dead in the eyes.

"Welcome to your _worst_ nightmare." Said Kasimar in a tone of pure evil.

"Get away from my first mate you scum sucking wretch!" Yelled a voice from nearby. Kasimar turned and gulped.

Barney was running up and had his fake dagger ready and he looked very angry. Kasimar looked from Spider to Barney and gulped.

"I'll take my leave now; but don't mess with me, or you'll regret it." Said Kasimar with a snarl as he took off running back towards camp.

Barney ran up and helped Spider to his feet.

"Are you ok me heartie?" Asked Barney in concern and determination. "Nobody messes with my friends! I know a few pirate tortures I could use on him."

"I'm fine; but *cough* I think Kasimar wants to *cough* kill me." Said Spider in fear. "I suddenly feel like that *cough* guy Carlton."

"Tis not a sin of the sea to be afraid me heartie." Said Barney as he put a hand on Spider's shoulder. "But I think he talks the talk more than he walks the walk yaaar. He's a coward. Though I'd still be wary around him; even cowards can throw good punches.

"So what should I *cough* do? He's threatened to *cough* destroy me!"

"Have no fear; this problem will sort itself out eventually; with that attitude that sea scum won't last much longer."

* * *

**Confessional- Stand up to the bully.**

**Kasimar: I only ran because I didn't want to make the weird kid cry. Actually I wouldn't have cared but I didn't feel motivated. It's not worth wasting my time talking about bug or the freak. It's more worth talking about the singer; now there's a nice piece of ass! Yahaha!**

**Spider: **(He looks a little nervous). **Why is Kasimar so** *cough*** nasty? Surely nobody can be so horrid without** *cough*** a reason right? But I really don't think it'd** *sneeze*** be worth looking for his good side. Oh boy; I'm in** *cough*** a load of trouble now.**

**Barney: If there's one thing this sea dog hates its bullies. They cause trouble and suffering for no reason. Each one I've met has met a **_**delightfully**_** sticky end. Yaaaar; hopefully the same will go for Kasimar as well. **

* * *

"But for now just push Kasimar out of your mind. We have more important issues me heartie!" Grinned Barney. "Such as hooking you up with Quana. It's now time for your next lesson."

"What's that? Is *cough* it making her a meal; I can *cough* cook, though I have to wear a doctor mask *sneeze* so I don't infect the food."

"It's not that yaaar; making her a meal is too forward. Though it's still something to consider once you and her are to each other like a ship and the sea. Your next lesson is to appeal to her; in other words get her to notice you."

"How do I do that? Give *cough* her some flowers?" Guessed Spider though Barney shook his head.

"A sweet gesture but you may get a type of flower she hates, or worse one that she's allergic to. And if you mess up in the run up to love then you're life is ruined me heartie; that's the brutal truth."

"Oh dear … so what do you have in mind?"

"I'd say that you should make her heart do somersaults; I'll explain more when an opportunity reveals itself. Yo ho; this is gonna be fun!"

"Dare I ask what will be fun?" Asked Andy as he walked up while finishing off a strawberry. "Shark riding by any chance?"

"Nope; I don't like sharks remember." Said Barney.

"Oh yeah; but I thought you conquered it." Said Andy as he scratched his hair a little.

"Doesn't mean I have to like them." Shrugged Barney.

* * *

**Confessional- Shark teeth are sharp!**

**Barney: Though I may dislike those scurvy sharks some people like them. I know a guy at school called Xeno; he's obsessed with the sharks, they're practically his crew! **

**Andy: I don't like sharks too much; I've seen what they can do on TV; if they smell even the smallest drop of blood they go into a frenzy! Still; I don't live near the beach so I have nothing to worry about.**

* * *

"So what are you doing then?" Asked Andy.

"Giving Spider his next love lesson." Smiled Barney. "I'm going to teach him how to appeal to Quana. It is one of the most variable tactics as it is totally dependent on the situation at hand."

"Why not just give her some flowers?" Suggested Andy.

"You clearly have a lot to learn about love me heartie." Chuckled Barney. "Flowers, chocolate and presents in general are too forward and she might think Spider is blatantly hitting on her. You do not want a girl to think that."

"I wonder why everyone thinks girls are confusing." Pondered Andy. "I wonder if they sometimes know the guy is crushing on them and just watch us try to get their attention for their own amusement."

"You haven't told *cough* anyone that I like Quana *cough* have you?" Asked Spider nervously.

"Not at all; it's between us three. Still; do you have any tips for me Barney?" Asked Andy.

"Yo ho! Who is it you like me heartie?" Said Barney genkily.

"Well … I like Mable. Don't tell anyone ok." Said Andy quickly.

"I promise I won't; a pirate always keeps his promises." Promised Barney with a salute. "Now pay attention 'class'; I think we should go over previous lessons; you know, for Andy's convenience."

Spider listened attentively while Andy wondered if this was such a good idea … but Barney was his friend, he wouldn't do him wrong on purpose right?

* * *

**Confessional- A pirate and his students.**

**Andy: I hope Barney knows what he's doing. He's had some success with helping Spider so I think it'll be worth a go. Though I do risk extreme embarrassment on the way. You live, you learn I guess.**

* * *

Kasimar had stopped running now and began to slowly walk. As he did he chuckled as he thought about the scared look on Spider's face. Causing pain was great, well, as long as it was him causing it and not receiving it. He chuckled his signature laugh as he ran a hand though his blue mohawk.

"When the merge arrives I'm going to rule this game; I can take whatever they dish out. And all I need to do is threaten people into voting with me; if they don't I can just pulverize them. Still; that cheerleader has to go, I don't want a short ginger bugging me all the time."

"Greetings my right hand man." Said Wallace as he walked up.

"Oh; hey Wallace." Grunted Kasimar. "What sort of evil do you have planned for today?"

"It depends on the challenge; but I'm always prepared so it matters not the theme. You'll be pleased to know that we're going to be screwing over Team Puzzle today." Said Wallace with a chuckle.

"Finally!" Said Kasimar happily. "I've been wanting to make the little kids cry. I just love the sound of screaming and crying."

"As evil as I expected." Nodded Wallace. "But I think that if we lose we should vote for Lavender, she's practically the leader."

"I agree; the last thing I want is a soulless ginger leading me about." Said Kasimar snidely.

"Why do you hate redheads anyway?" Asked Wallace. "In case you haven't noticed I have red hair as well."

"I can tolerate you because while you may be ginger you're evilness and blue arrow hair makes up for the sin of red hair." Explained Kasimar. "And I have my reasons for hating red heads."

"Care to finish that thought?" Asked Wallace.

"Basically I had a red haired henchman back at school; he betrayed me and I got suspended. I cornered him and left him with both arms broken but the fact remains I trusted him and he backstabbed me. You can't trust a ginger."

"You must trust your henchmen or they could turn on you and overthrow you in your quest for world domination." Nodded Wallace. "Mwahahahahahaha!"

"Just so you know I don't intend to lose; when we both reach the final two our alliance will end, you do get that right?"

"But of course my lackey; nothing lasts forever. You look to be a formidable opponent; it shall be a battle of legend! Mwahahahahaha!"

"Yeah; right, also I think we should avoid hurting the singer."

"You mean Quana?" Asked Wallace. "I didn't think you were a lovey dovie type."

"Hey; she's hot isn't she? Good rack, nice ass and more curves than a piece of string. She'll be mine one way or another, all girls want a bad boy." Chuckled Kasimar darkly. "And even if she doesn't want me it's not like she can do anything about it; I'm a guy and she's a meek little girl. Yahahahahaha!"

"Girls can be just as evil as guys my friend. Still; if you don't want a repeat of yesterday you might want to wear a jockstrap." Advised Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional- When evil becomes a pervert.**

**Kasimar: Quana's going to be mine by the end of this contest; nobody else likes her like that so I'll have no competition. And even if someone did like her they wouldn't beat me. Can you imagine her going out with that sick bug? Classic!**

**Wallace: Kasimar is learning fast; he has all the makings of a true villain. But he still knows not how to make traps, but I can fix that. Every villain should know how to make dynamite! Mwahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Vinnie sat down on the grass near camp and was thinking. He was thinking about Uzuri and how he actually was a little attracted to her.

"_I wonder why I am attracted to her_." Thought Vinnie to himself. "_Maybe its how she can keep a smile on her face no matter what. Sure she's strange … but maybe that's why I like her. She has a cute laugh as well. …What am I thinking? I'm useless in love; most people are put off by Pinchy._

Vinnie looked at his metal arm and sighed. Curse the day he went on that Easter egg hunt; the army just HAD to play war games on that day. And the paint truck just HAD to crash as well. Fate had a very cruel sense of humor in Vinnie's opinion.

Vinnie's thoughts drifted back to Uzuri and to his surprise he could feel his heart rate increasing. That had never happened before when he thought about a girl. Then again most girls back home were a little turned off by his metal arm.

"Hey Vinnie; how's it going?" Asked Gary as he walked up. "Something on your mind?"

"Well; this and that." Said Vinnie distantly.

"Are any of those things Uzuri?" Asked Gary while raising half of his unibrow.

"Maybe, maybe not." Said Vinnie with a blush.

Unfortunately for Vinnie Gary had noticed this and chuckled.

"Man; you've got it back for Uzuri haven't you?" Said Gary with a smile.

"I do not!" Said Vinnie though the look on his face suggested otherwise. "Ok; maybe a little."

"So; what is it that attracts you to her?" Asked Gary curiously.

"I don't really know; I just like how she can keep a cheery disposition despite everything. Plus she's full of fun; I don't really mind if she's unusual, I mean, look how unusual I am." Said Vinnie as he gazed down at his metal arm.

"Everyone has differences." Nodded Gary. "Though I'd focus on the game before you pursue a relationship. Besides; you sure she's the girl for you?"

"I don't really know." Said Vinnie as he put a finger to his chin. "I just kind of like her; don't you have someone you like but don't know why?"

"I most certainly do not." Said Gary as he turned away for a moment. "I didn't come to this God forsaken Island to get hooked up; I came to showcase my catering skills and win. Though with our team losing it's only a matter of time before I'm going to be in the bottom two at a Bonfire Ceremony."

"Well; you've got through four of them right? I don't see why you can't survive a fifth." Said Vinnie confidently. "Maybe we'll come first again today, you never know."

* * *

**Confessional: The final marshmallow goes to…**

**Gary: I hope Vinnie's right; I don't really like losing, it's inevitable everyone will fail at some point in their life but imagine if our team eventually had only one person left and it wasn't even the merge, what if the one person was me. I may be independent but I don't think I could take on two other teams single handed.**

**Vinnie: I try to look at the positives in life. Though losing my arm was traumatic and quite horrible I now have extremely strong grip and I could hold myself up with it for a very long time.**

* * *

"So; what do you think today's challenge will be?" Asked Vinnie. "If it's a cooking challenge we'll win hands down. Nobody can top you when you cook; you take cooking skill up to eleven."

"Thank mate." Smiled Gary. "Everyone has talents; mine is catering, Uzuri's is standing pain, yours is your really strong grip and compassion; even Kasimar has talent … his is causing pain and destruction."

"I don't like that guy; I hope he meets a sticky end; maybe something humiliating." Said Vinnie hopefully.

"We can only pray." Said Gary.

"Hi guys." Waved Raven as she walked up. "What's up?"

"We were just talking about the competition so far; our team is losing at the moment. You're lucky Raven; your team has only had one loss and since you're so nice I doubt you'll be voted off."

"Thanks Gary." Smiled Raven. "Though I'd rather n-not be on a team with K-Kasimar. He kinda scares me."

"He just needs to be taught a good lesson." Agreed Gary. "What kind of parents raised him?"

"Whoever they are they can't be parents of the year; that or they don't know how much of a bully he is." Pondered Vinnie. "I'll see you two later; I'm going to see what the others are doing. Later."

After a farewell wave from his metal arm Vinnie left back for camp. Gary watched him go and once he was out of hearing range turned back to Raven.

"So Raven; how are you holding up on your team?" Asked Gary. "Are Kasimar and Wallace giving anyone any problems?"

"Kasimar is never nice; he just loves to cause misery. Wallace is a psycho, if he worked for the side of goof we'd benefit." Said Raven. "I'm wondering if being on the winning team is worth putting up with them."

"You're not alone is your dislike of them; if it weren't for the fact your team wins so much they'd have been long gone by now." Said Gary. "And by the way; you're not stuttering, I guess you're getting braver eh?

"I guess I'm just used to you; and it's only you here so I'm fine. It feels good to have made some friends." Said Raven happily. "Back at school I rarely speak out; too many people I don't know."

"I don't mind school; I'm friends with most people. And I'm pretty good at speaking out in front of others." Said Gary. "Speaking of people; are you going to still vote for Wallace to leave in your next ceremony?"

"You know it. He's nuts alright; and he cheats all the time. The sooner he's gone the better."

"Well just keep surviving; who knows, we could be in the final two."

"That sounds nice; I could use a million dollars." Said Raven longingly. "I gotta go now; I'm nearly finished with Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince and I want to know how it ends; it's my favorite book series."

Raven left to her cabin which left Gary in a state of surprise.

"She likes Harry Potter too?" Whispered Gary to himself. "I did wonder if anyone else here was a fan of it."

* * *

**Confessional: Yer a wizard Gary.**

**Gary: Call me a nerd but I'm quite a fan of the Harry Potter books; the plot is just so deep and awesome, J.K Rowling is a rare and special writer. I've finished reading the entire series; I'm not going to spoil it for Raven; that would be mean.**

**Raven: Gary's nice; and the f-food he cooks looks really good. I wish I w-was in Team Jungle, that way I could get something good to eat for a c-change.**

* * *

Lavender and Mable were hanging out in their cabin. They were simply lying on their beds conversing about whatever came to mind.

"I'd say Pepsi is better than cola." Said Mable. "I just think it tastes better."

"I thought you didn't eat anything unhealthy." Said Lavender curiously.

"I treat myself to a can of Pepsi every month." Explained Mable. "Call me weird but I just don't like junk food too much."

"Believe it or not but I actually like junk food." Said Lavender as she began to lightly drool longingly. "I could go for Double Decker cheeseburger and fries about now."

"If you like junk food so much then how do you keep in such great shape?" Asked Mable with a coy look. "I was under the impression that junk food made people gain weight."

"It comes from the cheerleading I do; I never gain weight due to my active lifestyle."

"Really? Hmmm; maybe I should let myself go just a bit more." Said Mable in thought. "I did like the taste of the doughnut from the fear challenge; perhaps my fear of obesity is a bit irrational."

"I wouldn't say it's irrational." Said Lavender as she stretched out on her bed. I would have liked to see him strapped in the dentist chair with a needle in front of him. Sadistic, perhaps, but he deserves it."

"I don't like him either, actually none of us do. Wallace doesn't count because he's crazy as Ripper Roo." Shrugged Mable. "I'm just thinking about after the teams merge; it'll be a free for all so I'll need allies. We could be a duo."

"Good idea." Agreed Lavender. "Maybe we could bring down Kasimar."

"Hopefully; and maybe we could get someone else to join us." Said Mable. "Andy could be a good choice."

"How come?" Asked Lavender.

"He just seems trustworthy and nice; plus he eats healthily like me … and he helped me in the fear challenge."

"Oh did he? Methinks you _like_ him." Said Lavender slyly.

"You mean how you like Barney?" Teased Mable.

"Oh shush!" Blushed Lavender.

"Hi girls." Said Oscar as he appeared at the door. "Am I interrupting anything?"

"Well nothing _interesting_." Said Lavender. "What do you need Oscar?"

"Well; I was thinking. All successful teams I've heard of have had a leader of some kind. For example Chaotix has Vector, the British in World War two had Winston Churchill … and I'm captain of the school weight lifting team and we've never lost. Point is; I think we should elect a leader." Explained Oscar. "I was wondering what you think of that."

"Sounds like a good idea; we'd need someone smart, determined, friendly and generally likeable." Said Mable. "I guess that rules out Kasimar and Wallace."

"Who did you have in mind Oscar?" Asked Lavender.

"I was actually thinking that you would make a good leader Red." Said Oscar with a smile.

"Really? I know I'm head cheerleader back at school; but I'm not sure if all the others would like that." Said Lavender doubtfully.

"Listen, the only person on this team who dislikes you is Kasimar; and we all know he's a prejudiced bastard." Said Oscar nicely. "How about we take a vote later?"

"I think it's a good idea; you know Lavender, you and Oscar are probably the best choices for leader."

"Well; ok, we'll vote later." Agreed Lavender. "At the moment I could use a cup of coffee; I still feel sleepy."

"There's probably some in the mess hall … or you could just nick a latté off Chris." Suggested Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: Leaders are made, not just born.**

**Lavender: If I was the leader I'd have to listen to everyone and stop any inner team conflict; that could be hard considering how much Kasimar and Oscar hate each other and also Kasimar loves causing trouble. It's not easy being a leader; but I'll certainly give it a go.**

**Oscar: Being leader wouldn't be so bad; but you need intelligence as well as muscle and though I'm not thick I'm not as smart as I am strong. Lavender is definitely smarter. Still; I could be her bodyguard; that would put my strength to good use. **

**Mable: I could see Oscar and Lavender going together; but I'm completely certain she likes Barney.** (Mable suddenly smiles widely).** Between me and all of you guys at home I heard her mumble Barney's name is her sleep last night. Cute I do think so.**

* * *

Quana was taking a walk around camp and was trying to get rid of her worries. Well; worry would be a more accurate word as she had only one worry and it could summed up in just one word.

Kasimar.

Kasimar was quite possibly the nastiest creature it had been her misfortune to meet. He was prejudice, he swore, he hurt little kids … and now he was hitting on her! It was perverts like him that made Quana prefer to be single. He did get a lot of pain the previous day; she hadn't seen it happen due to having to sit on ice because of the pain in her toosh but he was pretty banged up afterwards. But she doubted that the pain he suffered would stop him from hitting on her.

"At least I'm not on his team." Said Quana to herself as she sighed.

"Are you ok Quana?" Asked Eleanor as she sat on a tree stump nearby. "You look kind of upset."

"Oh hey Eleanor; I didn't see you there." Said Quana with a smile. "What are you doing out here?"

"I'm just enjoying the wildlife; if you stay silent you can hear the wonderful singing of the birds. Listen." Said Eleanor as she looked up into the trees.

Quana stayed quiet and soon could hear the birds chirping as well; it really relaxed her for a moment.

"You're right; it is wonderful." Agreed Quana as she sat down on the grass next to Eleanor.

"So … why were you upset?" Asked Eleanor in concern.

"Care to take a guess?" Said Quana glumly.

"Oh … it's to do with Kasimar isn't it?" Said Eleanor in understanding. "You're not the only one he bullies you know; he does it to just about everyone in some way, shape or form."

"But he isn't hitting on anyone else." Said Quana with another sigh. "This is one of the drawbacks to being pretty. I don't obsess over my appearance but I acknowledge I'm at least somewhat good looking."

"That's not really for me to say; I prefer boys." Said Eleanor with a laugh.

"Me too; but so many people back home hit on me; it just makes me nervous." Explained Quana. "Maybe someday I'll meet someone who likes me for something other than my physical appearance."

"Love is more confusing than trying to use a company hotline as I once found out." Said Eleanor in memory. "You pressed one, if this is true then press one."

"Good one Eleanor." Laughed Jimmy as he walked up to them while writing in a notebook.

"Thanks; what are you writing?" Asked Eleanor as she looked at the notebook.

"I'm thinking of new jokes." Explained Jimmy. "Like, why did the man drown in the muesli?"

"I don't know; why?" Asked Eleanor.

"Because a strong currant pulled him in!" Said Jimmy with a laugh.

Eleanor exploded into a fit of giggles while Quana laughed in mirth.

"That was a good one; have you ever thought about becoming a stand up comedian?" Asked Quana.

"Not really; it's more of a hobby. I'm not really sure what I want to do yet, but it'll come to me in time."

"I know what I want to be; a singer." Said Quana longingly. "I joined this show so that I could get noticed by a singing agency of some kind."

"I'd like to be a vet; or maybe own an animal sanctuary." Said Eleanor. "What can I say; I just love animals."

"What are you guys going to do with the money if you win?" Asked Jimmy curiously. "A million dollars is quite a lot of money."

"I'm going to use it to get myself noticed, maybe buy a PS3 and the LittleBigPlanet series. I could also get a tattoo of a treble clef on my hip. Do you guys have any thoughts of what to do with the money?" Said Quana as she thought about how great it would be to win.

"I'd use it to adopt an animal in as many charities as I could. I could get more toys for Frost and Dandelion as well. I haven't got it all figured out but I guess I could improvise. What about you Jimmy? What would you do with a million dollars?"

"The first thing I'd do is to split it five ways with my friends back home because that's what I promised them before I came here. After that I'd buy the candy store and go on vacation to Japan, the county of dreams."

"That's so unselfish of you; you're a good egg." Smiled Eleanor.

"It's just in my nature." Said Jimmy as he returned the smile.

* * *

**Confessional: If I had a million dollars I'd go on Big Brother!**

**Quana: Sometimes I wish I could be as carefree as someone like Jimmy; but being sixteen years old and having had 'the talk' I've lost a fair bit of my childhood innocence. But I can still dream.**

**Jimmy: Quana didn't seem too happy; I can sort of tell if someone is unhappy. I'm guessing it's to do with Kasimar. **(Jimmy shudders). **He kind of scares me; why did I ask him to show me how to play uncle? I should have known he was going to hurt me! Being on the same Island as him is even worse than the time Ted's rare sports watch got flushed down the toilet and we had to go into the sewer looking for it; and I'm not getting into that. **

**Eleanor: I don't know how he does it but Jimmy has a way of lightening the mood of a situation. And him wanting to split the winnings with his friends; that's so sweet of him. **

* * *

Tabitha sat on the porch of her cabin with Uzuri next to her. She was looking at a sheet of paper; it had pictures of every camper besides herself on it. The photos of Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector and Zita had a red cross through them in red permanent marker. She was looking it over and thinking.

"Wotcha thinking about Tabitha?" Asked Uzuri as she held her emo doll. "Is it anything to do with horror movies?"

"Not quite Uzuri; I've made this list of everyone in the competition to keep track of who has been voted off; that way I know which team is weakest and thus is the one to gun for. Any guesses which team is weakest at the moment?" Asked Tabitha.

"That would be us right? We've got the least members." Guessed Uzuri. "Likewise I'd say Team Grenade is the strongest team as they've got the most people."

"And the strongest players. But you are correct; our team is losing … something I aim to fix. We may be losing but we have one thing that the others don't have. Do you know what that is?"

"Err … more girls than guys? Though that won't really help us win." Said Uzuri.

"That's true; but what I meant is that we have decent meals. Thus we have the best stamina and least sickness. And because of that factor when it comes to a physical challenge we shouldn't have too many problems."

"I'm not so sure; I'm not too strong." Said Uzuri.

"Maybe not; but you can stand pain way better than the rest of us; you did win the challenge for us yesterday," Said Tabitha while inwardly sighing about how slow Uzuri was to catch on. "Speaking of physical; how are you when it comes to intelligence?"

"Well; not too bad. I'm pretty good at English and Drama; but I've been banned from woodshop; I kept trapping my hands in the vices. I can't help it if it feels good can I? I was deemed too dangerous to have in the class so I was transferred to film class." Said Uzuri as she giggled at the memory. "You should have seen my latest project; it made the teacher faint! Who knew ghosts could be so scary? Teehee!"

"Yeah; right." Said Tabitha in confusion and frustration at Uzuri's ramblings. "I'll just say you're a B student. It shouldn't be long until the next challenge so we should get ready."

"I wonder what it will be … oh! Maybe we'll have to sit through a marathon of SAW and the last person who hasn't run away wins."

Before Tabitha could make a forced nice response the intercom crackled into life.

"Attention all remaining eighteen not as hot as me campers; it's time for your next challenge." Said Chris over the intercom. "This one is going to really separate the men from the boys if you know what I mean. Haha! Everyone report to the amphitheatre and we can get this challenge started."

The intercom turned off and Tabitha got to her feet.

"Another challenge another migraine." Muttered Tabitha. "Let's go and see what Chris wants; hopefully it won't involve torture again."

"Oh don't be so glum Tabitha; maybe it'll be fun!" Smiled Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional- About as fun as being crushed by an ice cream truck…**

**Tabitha: It somehow doesn't surprise me that Uzuri was banned from woodshop; she's a complete masochist. I will admit she is probably the most useful person on the team due to her immunity to pain. Still; she's really starting to test my patience; I'm actually wondering if I'd be better off in an alliance with Kasimar … Hmmm; that's not a bad idea. I'll have to think about that.**

**Uzuri: I may be on the losing team but I don't really mind that; I think we all get along. Meanwhile Team Grenade is in a state of inner team war. I don't think Lavender and Kasimar like each other too much. It's a shame really; when will everyone learn too get along?**

* * *

Not much later the eighteen campers were seated around the amphitheatre. Spider glanced at Kasimar and the two met eyes, Kasimar drew a finger across his throat and chuckled darkly. Spider gulped and turned away.

"I'm gonna enjoy squishing that bug." Smirked Kasimar to himself.

Chris walked on stage and made sure he had everyone's attention. He loved people watching him; it proved how awesome he was and how much everyone wished they could be him.

"Hello campers; it's time for your eighth challenge and this one you might even enjoy." Said Chris; this worried some of the campers as he didn't specify which one of them would enjoy it the most.

"Do we get to hurt each other?" Asked Kasimar as he looked over at Spider and Jimmy.

"Unfortunately no; but we're going to do something just as fun. You may remember the fourth challenge last season."

"You mean the one where Heather read out Gwen's diary?" Asked Andy. "That was a low blow indeed."

"Yes; that very one, the talent show. It is to do with what you'll be doing today." Said Chris with a chuckle.

"How much is it to do with our challenge?" Asked Irene.

"Oh; just enough because today's challenge is going to be … a talent show!" Announced Chris dramatically.

Some campers cheered whereas others didn't look as thrilled. And some looked unimpressed.

"Seriously; a talent show? Are you so unoriginal that you had to reuse another challenge from last season?" Asked Lavender with an eye roll.

Chris eye twitched and began to stomp his feet on the spot and began to have a temper tantrum.

"Shut up! I'm original! I have many great challenges planned out like animal wrangling and a trivia quiz!" Snapped Chris stropilly as he flailed his arms in anger. "You're just jealous you can't even come close to being as awesome as I am because you're a red head and a _girl_! So nyeh!"

Chris finished by sticking his tongue out at Lavender and storming off the stage. As he left Chef Hatchet walked on. The burly cook glanced at Chris with a raised eyebrow and turned to the campers.

"Ok maggots! Following Chris's 'episode' I'll finish explaining the rules. Each team has to pick three acts to represent them. Any talent is allowed; even something illegal as Chris wants to attract viewers in jail. You have until sunset to pick your acts; if you cannot get three acts before that time you will automatically lose and the remaining teams will battle for the special prize. Those are the rules so you might as well get to it."

With that Chef Hatchet left the stage back to the kitchen. The teams looked amongst each other and began to disperse.

* * *

**Confessional: My talent is juggling without arms!**

**Lavender: I don't think this'll be too hard; I'm great at cheerleading. I just need the right words to go with it and maybe some music to go with it. I wonder what talents the others can do. I'm sure Oscar's will be something like weight lifting but as for Wallace I have no idea, he's as unpredictable as the lottery.**

**Quana: This challenge is practically tailored to me! As you all know singing is my talent. I'm sure I could make up a song worthy of a perfect ten. I think today is gonna be a great day! **

**Jimmy: I've been in talent shows before back at school; my stand up comedy always does pretty well. Maybe I can bring the house down with laughter. Because let's face it, laughter is the ultimate medicine … but if you've got the flu you're probably better off with the jab. **

**Raven: I'm not sure about this challenge; I d-do have a talent but I'd rather not go on stage. I h-hope the others will understand.**

* * *

The campers were leaving the amphitheatre and were thinking about what they could do that was talented; some knew what they'd do already but others were still thinking. It had to be fun to watch and have little chance of going horribly wrong.

"This is going to be so much fun." Said Quana excitedly. "This could be the challenge that gets me noticed."

"I'm noticing you already." Smirked Kasimar as he walked past. "I wouldn't mind seeing you on something R rated. That would be awesome. Yahahahaha!"

Kasimar laughed as he walked off; the expression on Quana's face was full of shock and horror at what the perverted bully had just said.

"Did he just say…?" Said Quana before she trailed off in negative astonishment.

"That guy be off the worst stock this pirate has ever seen." Said Barney as he glared after Kasimar. "Does he have no tact, no shame?"

"That's it; I'm gonna *cough* make him sorry." Growled Spider as he began to go after Kasimar. Andy held him back and shook his head.

"Let him go; he's not worth it." Said Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: Why couldn't the boy get into the pirate movie? It was rated aaaaar!**

**Quana: Ok; I'm starting to seriously get creeped out by that guy; what he was implying is dreadful. It was nice of spider to try and go after him; but Andy's right, Kasimar isn't worth it. Still; I wonder why Spider got so angry like that. He's probably just looking out for me as I'm his friend.**

**Spider: Four words … Kasimar is going down.**

**Andy: I am shocked and appalled; if he'd said that to Mable I'd have attacked him violently. **(Andy shakes his head and sighs). **People like him shouldn't be on TV.**

**Chris: Yes they should you spaz! They're what bring in ratings!**

* * *

While the others had gone off to choose their acts and practice them Wallace had snuck backstage. He had somehow taken out a suitcase marked with the words ''PROPERTY OF THE WALLACE'' stamped onto it. He opened it and smiled evilly as he looked upon all the gadgets and devices inside it.

"This is going to be the best challenge yet! It'll be a day for evil to triumph over good! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he began to set up traps around the stage. He whistled a tune as he did so and soon noticed a camera watching him.

"Oh, hello camera. Don't worry; none of this stuff is going to kill anyone, it may hurt them but nothing too bad. It's in my contract that I'm allowed to cheat." Explained Wallace as he climbed up a ladder to the higher parts of the stage and set up a bucket full of bowling balls.

"This is gonna be sweeeeet." Sniggled Wallace as he jumped down to the ground level and squirted some sort of translucent slippery liquid to the floor under the bowling ball bucket. "When someone slips on this I just activate the bucket above and crash! I hope they like strikes because that's what'll happen to them! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

Wallace nodded to himself since his work was done and he exited the stage area to rejoin his team.

"And now for phase two … waiting for a victim." Said Wallace as he ran to his team's cabin where his teammates would probably be.

* * *

**Confessional: Dick Dastardly stops to cheat.**

**Wallace: I feel very content; only a true villain could put down all those traps without anyone coming to stop him. The best part is that they will only activate if I use my remote so I won't hurt anyone I don't need gone. The plan is to go for Team Puzzle … so shall it be written so shall it be done. Mwahahahahaha!**

**Irene: I don't know why but I have a bad feeling in my gut about this challenge. Hopefully I'm wrong. **

* * *

Hmmm; looks like Wallace is getting serious about cheating. It also looks like Kasimar is getting more shameless in his attempts to hit on Quana. How will this end up? With a trip to the infirmary?

Next time the acts are chosen and the show goes on. A team loses and someone leaves the Island … and it may be a surprise when you see who leaves.


	17. Day 8, Part 2, Screams on the Stage

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the 'Season that Must Never Be Named'. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. And let's not forget that I also do not own the alphabet theme; that was first created by Frank15 so thank you to him.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains discrimination, a bully, evil laughter, some bad language, a mention of the words 'toosh' and cheating. As always it is nothing M rated.

**Extra Warning:** READ! This chapter contains a big spoiler for harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. You have been warned.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender AndyxMable JimmyxEleanor GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri and a secret couple.

**Note: **This chapter is the longest yet at thirty nine word pages. If you think you know who's going to leave already you may be surprised with who leaves. I've been working on this chapter for three days getting it perfect. But now its done and ready to read.

Put up your feet, sit down and relax or Kasimar will bust a painful cap in your ass!

* * *

After being dismissed from the amphitheatre following Chris's temper tantrum the three teams were going to go about picking acts for the talent show that night. This was going to be easier said than done as some campers didn't look as talented as others…

* * *

**Confessional- I've told you my talent already; leave me alone!**

**Xaria: I'm not really sure what I could do as a talent; the only thing I'd say I'm extremely good at is pinball, and how am I going to make that look exciting on a stage? Typical really; tilt the odds against my favor. I don't think this challenge will be much fun.**

* * *

Team Puzzle were sitting around their cabin and getting ready to audition their talents. Jimmy was choosing the best jokes he knew, Eleanor was practicing the harmonica, Barney was juggling a number of stones and Spider was writing on a piece of paper.

"What are you writing Spider?" Asked Barney as he looked down at Spider's tidy hand writing. "Is it a shopping list me heartie?"

"Not at all; it's *cough* creative writing. I'm writing my emotions onto *sneeze* paper." Explained Spider.

"Shiver me timbers; it looks like the student has become skilled. I was going to suggest making your talent appeal to Quana." Whispered Barney while looking impressed. "And you've done just that by yourself. Good job Spider."

Barney slapped Spider on the back in a friendly way which made Spider cough for a moment.

"Please refrain from *cough* doing that; it hurts my spleen." Explained Spider.

"Gotcha." Nodded Barney.

"So how will it appeal to her?" Asked Spider.

"Because girls love a heart warming story and Quana could do with cheering up after what Kasimar did. Just trust me." Said Barney with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional: I can't write stories because I have no hands!**

**Spider: Writing stories is fun; but** *cough*** when I read them out I cough between words. I** *cough*** hope it doesn't ruin the performance … but it** *sneeze*** inevitably will. **(Spider sighs).

**Eleanor: I wonder what Barney and Spider were talking about; they've been hanging out a bit lately. I guess they're just getting along. It's great that our team is full of friendliness. But with people like Jimmy and Barney on your team it's hard not to smile.**

* * *

"So who wants to go first?" Asked Andy.

"I will!" Said Jimmy excitedly as he walked up in front of his team mates.

"Ok Jimmy; you show us what you've got!" Said Barney encouragingly.

"Good luck!" Called Quana.

Jimmy adjusted his hat and steadied himself. After this he began to speak.

"So I got up this morning; I brushed my teeth, had my breakfast and got into my suit. I opened the door and a ten foot tall insect punched me in the gut. I should have seen it coming as I'd been cold there was a bad bug going around."

"Yebehbehbeh!" Laughed Andy joyfully. "That was a good one!"

"Hahahahahahaha!" Laughed Quana in hysterics. "Jimmy; your jokes never disappoint me."

"Do you want to hear another one?" Asked Jimmy.

"Very much so; continue." Smiled Eleanor.

"Ok; knock, knock!" Said Jimmy while trying to surpress a laugh.

"Who's *cough* there?" Asked Spider.

"Alpaca." Said Jimmy.

"Alpaca who?" Asked Barney.

"Alpaca the trunk; you pack the suitcase! Heheehee!" Laughed Jimmy.

Everyone laughed at the funny joke and Jimmy took a bow. Quana clapped and smiled.

"I think we can all agree that Jimmy is one of our three acts; am I right?" Asked Quana to everyone else.

"I agree Quana me sea lass; the cabin boy should represent us. Yo ho!" Said Barney as he recovered from the immense amount of laughing.

"You won't regret it." Promised Jimmy as he sat back down next to Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: That was so funny I forgot to laugh!**

**Jimmy: I think I did pretty well back there. My friends back home always like my jokes and so does everyone here. Maybe I could become a comedian. I'll have to get a good routine ready for tonight.**

**Quana: There are people who are naturally funny; Jimmy is even funnier than them. I think we're going to own this challenge.**

* * *

"So who's next?" Asked Quana.

"I'll go." Offered Barney. "I've got a really good talent!"

"Sure; let's see it." Smiled Quana.

Barney picked up a pile of about ten rocks and stood in front of the others. He then began to juggle the rocks like a pro.

"So what do you think? Pretty cool huh?" Grinned Barney as he began to whistle a tune while still juggling the rocks.

"How do you do that?" Asked Eleanor in amazement.

"Practice." Said Barney simply.

"Can you juggle anything besides rocks?" Asked Andy.

"Pretty much anything as long as it's not too heavy and it's not a cactus; trust me, they hurt when you juggle them. I learned a lot that day; namely to not try and juggle spiky things."

As Barney said all that he still hadn't stopped juggling and was now looking at the clouds.

"I think that's *cough* really good." Said Spider as he clapped. "I vote that Barney is one of *cough* the three acts."

"Have you ever thought about joining the circus Barney?" Asked Quana.

"Not really; I just do this for fun. And besides; I think my grades would let me become something a _bit_ higher than a clown … err; forget I said anything about my grades." Said Barney as he stopped juggling and caught the rocks. "So who's next?"

"Why do you never go into detail about your intelligence?" Asked Jimmy curiously.

"No reason." Said Barney shiftily. "Let's just say it's the summer and I'd like to separate it from my school life."

"…Ok, I'll buy that." Smiled Jimmy. "Who wants to go up next?"

"I will." Smiled Eleanor as she took out her harmonica.

While Eleanor got ready Quana, Spider and Andy couldn't help but glance at Barney for a few seconds.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't go to school; I kind of lack a brain, being a toilet stall and all.**

**Andy: I wonder why Barney changed the subject when he mentioned his grades. Maybe he doesn't like to talk about school. I don't blame him; sometimes school can be a bit boring. It is the summer as Barney said; time to forget what we've learned and just enjoy ourselves.**

**Quana: That's odd; why did Barney just change the subject like that; maybe he's got a bad school life. I can understand that; I sometimes get a bit of crap from the so called 'libbies' at school. They're always horrible to the underdogs of popularity, like Nakia was to Spider.**

**Spider: **(He looks deep in thought). **I bet the others are pondering this** *cough*** too; why did Barney change the subject. Hmmm … could** *sneeze*** it possible he's ashamed to admit *cough* that he's intelligent? What's so bad about being ***cough*** a, ahem, 'nerd'. We're going to go good ***hard cough*** places in the future.**

**Barney: **(He enters the confessional and closes the door tightly; he listens against it for a moment and sighs). **That was a close one; curse my tendency to talk more than I should. Yaaaaar. You guys out there are probably wondering what just happened right? Well; no point hiding it forever. I'm kinda … an A+ student; I'm just embarrassed that I'm so smart. Most people prefer a cool guy; that's why my fun loving side appears more than my smart side. Well; at least they didn't ask anymore questions…**

* * *

Eleanor began playing a tune on her harmonica; it sounded very good and relaxing. She must have had a large amount of practice to play it with such skill.

"That sounds really good." Said Andy as he let the relaxing tune flow through him.

Eleanor gave the thumbs up while not stopping the tune. Jimmy began to snap his fingers along to the beat of the harmonica solo.

"That's catchier than Pokémon; get it?" Said Jimmy with a laugh.

"Good one *cough* little buddy." Said Spider as he blew his nose on the tissue.

Eleanor finished the song and took a bow.

"It wasn't one of the longer songs but its still pretty complex." Said Eleanor. "What do you think?"

"I say encore." Clapped Jimmy. "I think you did really good."

"Good job; I liked it, that was *the bomb*." Said Andy as he also clapped.

"Yaaaaaaaaar! I think that was very talented; well done." Smiled Barney.

"Thanks guys." Smiled Eleanor gratefully. "So; is it good enough to one of the acts that represent us tonight?"

"I think that while *cough* it's no doubt good … you'll *cough* need a longer song if it does get *cough* chosen. What do you guys *sneeze* think?" Said Spider constructively.

"I think we'll need to see more acts to make a proper decision." Said Quana. "But I think it was very good."

"Who wants to go next?" Asked Eleanor.

"I will." Said Andy. But his voice didn't sound like it usually did; it sounded dark and evil. His team mates turned to him and instantly saw why.

Andy had somehow changed outfits in a few seconds and now sported a black Darth Vader outfit and cape. He also wore a black helmet that covered his face. In his right hand he held a toy light saber.

"Err … why are you dressed like that Andy me heartie?" Asked Barney

"I don't know any Andy … I am Star Wars Kid." Said Andy as he made his way in front of everyone to perform his talent.

* * *

**Confessional: Star wars nerd I am not!**

**Barney: Andy must have watched an unhealthy dose of Star Wars to have this as his talent. Curse you George Lucas you scurvy dog; you've taken another victim! I admit I've seen Star Wars but I think the only good part of it was the pod racing. If you want a good movie then watch any of the Toy Story trilogy.**

**Eleanor: Star Wars; from what I've heard it has a complex plot and some character called JarJar Binks that everyone hates. Not my cup of tea. **

* * *

Andy stood before the others and beckoned to Quana.

"Turn on the music." Said Andy as he pointed to the stereo.

Quana pressed the play button while unsure of what music would come out.

Instantly the star wars theme song stared to play and Andy's act began.

Andy marched forwards like Darth Vader and swung the light saber as though it were a sword. He spun on the spot and held it out before he stopped and kneeled.

"Fear me Yoda." Said Andy in the 'dark evil voice'. "Doubt me you mustn't for defeat you I shall!"

Andy marched back to where he started and swung the toy light saber around some more. He thrust out his hand and pointed right at Jimmy.

"The force is strong in this one." Said Andy darkly as he swished his cape over himself and crouched down.

All was silent for a few seconds.

Suddenly Andy leapt up and raised the light saber. When he landed he bought it right down to the feet of his team.

"Join the dark side … we have cookies." Said Andy as he struck a bold pose and finished the act as Quana turned the music off.

Barney instantly began to clap for his friend and soon the rest of the team was as well.

"You bring a good name to Star Wars fans everywhere." Congratulated Barney.

"I'll join the dark side if the cookies have white chocolate chips." Said Jimmy with a laugh.

"So … how did I do? I've been practicing the routine before I came here in case there was going to be a talent show; good thing I did right?"

"I vote that Andy represents us." Said Barney with a nod. "Who agrees?"

"I second that emotion." Smiled Quana.

"I agree; that was really good. Go Andy!" Cheered Eleanor while Andy smiled.

"So we've got Andy and *cough* Jimmy chosen already; who's going to be the *cough* third act?" Asked Spider.

"I'm not sure yet … I know; why don't you go next Spider?" Suggested Quana.

"Me? Why don't you *cough* go before me? I'm sure we'd all *cough* like to hear your singing." Said Spider awkwardly.

"Don't worry me first mate." Said Barney with a smile. "I'm sure your talent will be a real show stopper."

"Ok then; I'll give it a *cough* go." Shrugged Spider as he got up and stood in front of the others. "My talent is creative *cough* writing; here's something I wrote a short while *cough* ago.

Spider took out a piece of paper; the one he had been writing on a few minutes ago and cleared his throat and coughed, he then began to read.

"This morning I consumed a custard cream *cough* biscuit yet upon it being nurtured *cough* in my gut and also when my eyes glanced across the table *sneeze* of team spirit it nurtured into a warm fuzzy feeling. When I *cough* try alone I fail and yet when I have with me my tutor of emotion there *cough* is nothing I cannot accomplish; except defeating the vile arch demon of my quest. He is a Karma Houdini *cough* and no amount of suffering he endures matches the crimes he has committed *cough* to those who I care for. I *cough* must not give up the unicycle of fate and chance; my teacher from *sneeze* the world of accomplishment has taught me *cough* an important lesson … one by one … all the villains will go down."

Spider stopped reading; everyone looked at him unblinking for a moment.

"_Oh holy crud on toast! That was an utter disaster! I knew I should have put more time into it!_" Thought Spider glumly.

Suddenly everyone cheered and stood up clapping loudly much to Spider's surprise.

"That was excellent!" Clapped Andy.

"Very talented." Added Eleanor.

"As Harold would say; Awesome." Cheered Jimmy.

"You liked it?" Said Spider in surprise. "I would have thought my coughs and sneezes would have ruined it."

"Oh don't be such a woobie me heartie!" Laughed Barney merrily. "I think it was very well worded; a good effort! Don't you agree Quana?"

"Indeed I do; it was quite complex and in a good way. So; was that from your perspective Spider?" Asked Quana curiously.

"...You know; I think saying that would *cough* take away the enjoyment from it." Smiled Spider. "So; do you think its *cough* good enough?"

"I think it is." Nodded Quana. "But I'm not sure if Chris would see it that way; for all we know he could be judging. Do you think you could read it without coughing?"

"I'm afraid not; I can *cough* barely string a sentence together *cough* without coughing twice." Said Spider with a sigh. "Maybe it would be best if someone else represented us; I don't want to screw it up."

"Don't put yourself down; Chris is just a negative dickhead anyway." Smiled Quana. "Looks like it's time for my act now."

* * *

**Confessional: It's time for a scene … and I don't mean the hissy fit you make when the bakery is out of croissants.**

**Quana: Spider seems to have a sort of inferiority complex; and Nakia putting him down when she was here didn't help. I guess that's the result of being perpetually sick for years. Some say fate has a cruel sense of humor; others say fate has a wonderful sense of humor but the trick is learning how to take a joke. I think that his niceness and intelligence make up for any sickness. I think this challenge is going to be fun; singing is something I'm quite talented at.**

**Barney: Yaaar! That was a very good act my apprentice put up; and Andy did good as well. I think I know what Spider was trying to say in that story but I'll keep silent so Spider can explain it … if he wants to. If only Spider could get better; then he'd probably be the most popular person around!**

**Spider: Yeah; that was something I threw** *cough*** together a few minutes before we started the auditions. For those who** *cough*** want to know … it actually WAS in my perspective. The warm fuzzy feeling** *sneeze*** when I glanced across the table was me glancing at Quana. The tutor was** *cough*** Barney and the vile arch demon was Kasimar. In a way it could be** *hard cough*** interpreted as a mini story of my time here thus far.**

* * *

Quana took out her microphone as she stood in position and ready to sing.

"Looking forward to hearing her sing matey?" Whispered Barney to Spider genkily.

"Just a bit." Responded Spider before he turned to Andy. "Hey Andy; you did *cough* really good with your talent."

"Thanks Spider; I just hope it'll go just as well tonight." Said Andy as he sat comfily in his seat while waiting for Quana to start.

"What song are you going to sing Quana?" Asked Jimmy. "Is it going to be 'everybody wants to rule the world'? I love that song!"

"I do as well; but I'm singing an original song; though the music is am instrumental that isn't mine." Explained Quana. "Ok; I'm ready, start the music."

Eleanor pressed the play button on the stereo and the newly inserted CD began to play a sort of ambient aquatic theme. Quana began to tap her foot to the beat and raised the microphone to her mouth as she started to sing.

_Wa-wa-nakwa_

_Island_

_Wa-wa-nakwa_

_Island_

_Quana Chloe Silva_

_That's me_

_Teeeeeam Puuuuuzzle_

_Me and my friends_

_Will get to the end_

_Kasimar is my nemesis_

_He ain't gonna get one over on me_

_I am gonna defeat him_

_Make him sorry_

_Nakia is also not very nice_

_But she is just as dangerous as lice_

_Spider and Barney_

_Andy, Eleanor and Jimmy_

_We'll work together_

_And one will win the million_

_Though the danger is worth a billion_

_I'm going all the way_

_That's a true fact; mmm'kay _

_One by one the foes will fall_

_Until I'm left standing in victory's hall_

_This is the beg-gin-ing_

_Of a summer_

_On this godfor-saken Island_

_Some-where in muskoka._

_Yeah_

Quana stopped singing and Eleanor turned the stereo off; instantly everyone erupted into loud and wild applause. Quana bowed and twirled her microphone in her hand.

"Did you like it?" Asked Quana as she sat back down.

"It was bloody brilliant." Clapped Spider with a smile. "No wonder you *cough* want to become a singer. With vocal skills *cough* like that; you could be the next Michael Jackson."

"Ok; put your hands up if you think Quana should be the third act." Said Jimmy as he raised his hand.

Everyone else raised their hands and Jimmy smiled.

"Looks like the three acts are me, Andy and Quana then." Said Jimmy as he stood up. "I'm going to go and think of some _really_ funny jokes; I see you later everyone."

Jimmy got up and left for his cabin and Quana stood up as well.

"Why don't we all take a break?" Suggested Quana as she twirled her microphone some more. "We've picked the acts so we can kick back and take five. I'll go and pick a song to sing later."

Quana left back to her cabin sashaying her hips a little, something she tended to subconsciously do when in a really good mood.

"No staring at her tooshy now." Whispered Barney to Spider with a chuckle.

"I was not!" Whispered Spider with an extreme blush.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no hips; let alone legs.**

**Quana: On one hand I criticize Chris's lack of originality for reusing another challenge. On the other hand I'm thankful because this is something I'm good at. Sometimes the world gives you a freebie.**

**Chris: I'm more original than you ya piece of jailbait! Nyeh!**

* * *

Team Grenade was seated outside of camp away from the prying eyes of the other teams and were ready to choose their acts for the talent show. They were currently debating who would go first.

"How about I go first?" Suggested Lavender. "I've got a pretty good talent."

"Like a ginger could do anything talented." Sneered Kasimar.

Oscar punched Kasimar in the side of the head without even looking at him.

"Don't mind the prejudiced bastard Red; the rest of us actually have some tact." Said Oscar as he glared at Kasimar. "You can go first if you want."

"Thank you Oscar." Said Lavender politely as she put on some cheerleader pompom's and stood in front of the others.

She cleared her throat and began a cheerleading routine which consisted of some high kicks, air punches and even the splits. While doing this she began to sing a cheer based on her team.

_Go go Team Grenade_

_We're even better than cherryade_

_With Mable's toughness and Oscars muscle_

_We'll win this game show tussle_

_One of us'll win, take your pick_

_But not Kasimar because he's a dick!_

Lavender finished by bending her knees and back flipping into a split. Everyone applauded except Kasimar.

"That was great; especially the part where you called Kasimar a dick." Laughed Oscar as he clapped with his strong hands.

"Looks like we agree on something." Said Xaria as she mildly clapped. "I don't like him either."

"Like you could do anything talented." Snapped Kasimar. "In the end I would be chosen over you because I'm actually strong and fit. You're just a waste of space!"

Xaria growled but stayed silent and mumbled to herself. Oscar however wasn't going to let Kasimar get away with this.

"There's no shortage of space anywhere except during rush hour." Snapped Oscar. "You're probably just jealous of Xaria!"

Kasimar looked stunned but simply crossed his arms and scowled.

"…Thanks Oscar." Mumbled Xaria.

"Don't worry about it; what are team mates for?" Smiled Oscar.

"So … was it good enough to represent us?" Asked Lavender as she bought the conversation back to what it had originally been about.

"I'd say so." Nodded Raven. "You did r-really good."

"I agree." Nodded Oscar. "It was a good act; it takes guts to become a cheerleader."

"Tell me about it." Said Lavender as she sat back down. "So many stereotypes to fight against."

* * *

**Confessional: Go home team!**

**Lavender: The cheerleaders are dumb stereotype isn't the only thing I have to fight against. A lot of people think cheerleaders are nasty to unpopular people and make out with any of the jocks. **(Lavender sighs bitterly). **And some people hassle me for having red hair; that's not right! Kasimar is really pissing me off; I hope someone teaches him a lesson someday.**

**Oscar: Lavender is a good friend of mine; and I REALLY do not like it when someone messes with my friends. …Now before you ask, no, I do not have a crush on her. I think she likes someone else though I don't know who. Meh; no problem there, I'm not really a lovey dovie type.**

**Xaria: I'm not a waste of space; why do people feel the need to tell me that? At least Oscar stood up for me; that was very nice of him. **(Xaria scowls). **Most people don't bother to help me.**

**Kasimar: Hey; whatever. Who cares if people get hurt and sad on my way to victory? That's just life; you have to be strong to survive and in shows like this it's inevitable that people will be hurt along the way … so long as it's me doing the hurting that is! Yahahahahaha!**

* * *

"Who wants to go next?" Asked Raven.

"I'll have a go." Said Mable as she reached into a strangely shaped bag she bought with them and took out a pogo stick.

"A pogo stick?" Asked Xaria flatly. "Those things are impossible."

"Not to me they're not." Smiled Mable as she mounted the pogo stick and began to bounce.

Mable clearly had experience with pogo related maters as she neither wobbled nor misbounced. She just kept on jumping without fail; after a few bounces she began to twirl in the air and then raise one foot off her pogo stick while off the ground.

"What do you guys think?" Asked Mable as she continued to bounce.

"…What the hell; I'm impressed." Shrugged Xaria. "I vote for Mable to represent us."

"I think it was pretty good too." Admitted Wallace with an evil smile. "If you want I could rebuild the pogo stick to shoot out explosive pigeons! Mwahahahahaha!"

"No thank you; I'd rather keep it as it is." Said Mable as she stopped bouncing and walked back to her seat.

"How did you do that?" Asked Xaria with a raised eyebrow. "I can't even bounce once on a pogo stick; what's your secret?"

"There is actually no secret; it just takes a lot of practice." Explained Mable. "Also it takes a good sense of balance."

"I'm not really into physical activity; I prefer staying indoors." Shrugged Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: And I have got doors!**

**Xaria: I'm not really in any tight social circle; I much prefer to stay in my room and maybe play some video games. I do go outside every now and then but I just keep to myself.**

**Mable: Everyone's gotta have a hobby right?**

* * *

Next up to show their talent was Kasimar; everyone expected something taboo or unlawful but it was neither. Kasimar took out a wireless electric guitar and prepared to rock out.

The guitar was red and orange but was black on the handle with a metal skull attached to it. It seemed very well made and expensive; one could wonder how Kasimar had came to own it.

"Are you douche nozzles ready to rock?" Yelled Kasimar.

"Ready to throw a rock at your head." Replied Oscar dryly.

"Everyone shut the hell up because here I go!" Screamed Kasimar like a rocker as he began to play the instrument.

Wow. That was all anyone could say. Kasimar may have been a nasty piece of work but he was a master at the electric guitar; there was no denying his skill with the instrument.

His hands were like a blur on the buttons and strings as he churned out heavy metal; the type that drug filled concerts usually have.

Kasimar finished the song and struck a pose.

"Extreme." Said Kasimar tonelessly to finish off his act.

Wallace clapped quite normally but everyone else forced themselves to clap once. Kasimar looked as angry as his mug shot on the official website.

"What? That was pure talent!" Snapped Kasimar. "Why aren't you applauding?"

"Do you want the short reason or the long reason?" Asked Oscar.

"The short one." Grunted Kasimar.

"Ok; the short reason is … we all hate you." Replied Oscar. "Even if you were the only good act we had, because of how nasty you are we still wouldn't let you participate, right everyone?"

"Well said Oscar." Nodded Xaria as she crossed her arms.

"Yeah; very well worded, especially when you said we hated him." Agreed Lavender before turning to Kasimar. "Sorry, actually, no, I'm not sorry to say we won't be letting you perform tonight."

Kasimar snarled and widened his eyes to the point they looked bloodshot. This, combined with his large eyebrows, goatee and blue mohawk made him look quite scary but Lavender showed no fear.

"Grrrr." Growled Kasimar as he sat back down next to Wallace.

"Don't worry about it my right hand man. It takes time to become a truly evil and awesome bad guy." Said Wallace as he twirled a bomb in his hands. "Besides; I would have voted for you to perform."

"Uh huh; whatever." Grunted Kasimar as he prepared to watch the next act.

* * *

**Confessional: Bloodshot eyes or bloodshot pies?**

**Kasimar: That cheerleader is getting on my nerves; how dare that cow talk to me like that! Still; I guess it could be worse, I could be on a team that actually lost. Winning is fun. Yahahaha! But in the meantime I should think how I'm going to get Oscar off my back; his punches are painful … and I *don't* like pain.**

**Lavender: Standing up to a bully really gives you a fire inside your belly doesn't it? I've done it before and I can do it here. Last season Heather left without her hair … I wonder what fate will befall Kasimar? Hopefully something humiliatingly brutal. Heehaheehahee.**

* * *

"Who's up next?" Asked Mable. "We still need to pick more acts."

"I'll go." Smiled Wallace as he got off his seat. "Prepare to be evilly amazed! Mwahahahaha!"

"Is your, umm, 'talent', going to cause any collateral damage?" Asked Raven nervously.

"Not too much." Said Wallace as he began to take some stuff out from his pockets. "But if it does then that's an added bonus. Mwahahahaha!"

"So … what's your talent?" Asked Oscar.

"Making fireworks." Said Wallace as he finished taking things out of his pockets and began to rapidly construct a firework; his hands moved so fast they were liker greased lightning.

"But it's daytime." Said Raven in confusion. "Wouldn't it m-make more sense to do it at night?"

Wallace chuckled while he worked and shook his head.

"I'm afraid not you naïve fool. For you see; in the year two thousand and five minutes ago the word 'sense' was removed from the dictionary … along with 'confuzzled', 'linguini' and 'bell pepper'. Thus it is currently illegal to put any sense into anything whatsoever."

"What a load of bullcrap." Muttered Kasimar.

"And done." Said Wallace as he backed away from his creation. "Presenting the Shooting Star Omega Three Thousand!"

"Why do geniuses put big numbers on the end of everything?" Grumbled Xaria. "It's such a cliché."

"Because it's cool and we can." Said Wallace as he leaned down and took out a lighter. "Prepare to be amazed."

Wallace lit the fuse and got a safe distance away. The long named firework shot up into the air with a high pitched whistle and exploded into a large amount of black and purple sparks that spelt Wallace's name.

"Not bad right? Mwuhahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he looked up to the sky.

"Well; it certainly has an appeal to it." Admitted Lavender. "And Chris probably likes explosions."

"But is it too slow to start?" Pointed out Mable.

"I guess so." Agreed Lavender. "And the whistling is a bit high pitched and loud. I think we'll call it a maybe."

Wallace didn't look impressed.

* * *

**Confessional: Fireworks go pow pow!**

**Wallace: How dare they put the great Wallace's talent as a maybe! This is an outrage! Those flippin pricks … they're gonna pay … they're gonna pay!**

**Oscar: I didn't think the talent was too bad … but he is allied with Kasimar after all so he can't be a very nice person. Then again it's a bit of a give away if the person in question always goes on about how evil they are.**

* * *

"How about you go next Raven." Said Oscar.

"Are you sure? Wouldn't you rather go first?" Asked Raven.

"Ladies first." Smiled Oscar.

Raven shrugged and quickly put on a different set of shoes. When she was ready she walked to the front to start her audition.

"My talent is tap dancing." Said Raven. "I h-hope you enjoy it."

Raven then began to dance; despite the dirt ground everyone could hear the sounds of the taps. It was pretty good and when Raven finished everyone except Kasimar cheered.

"I think that could be good enough to represent us." Said Lavender as she slapped.

"Thanks Lavender … but I'd rather not; I don't really want to go on the stage in front of everyone. If I messed up it would be humiliating." Said Raven as she twirled her thumbs a little.

"If you're sure then that's fine." Said Lavender nicely. "You can't really force someone to do something they don't want to do."

"Thanks; this'll give me a chance to catch up on my reading of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince."

As Raven said that and sat down Kasimar suddenly had a jerkass and mean idea.

"Hey Raven; wanna know a spoiler? Snape kills Dumbledore! Yahahaha!"

Raven was silent and her eye twitched a little before she turned to Kasimar looking _furious._

"You _prat_! You just ruined the ending! Why did you do that?" Said Raven angrily.

"Because it's funny; why else?" Laughed Kasimar. His laughter was short lived as Raven ran up and kicked him in the balls. "OOOOOOO; my soldiers ain't marching."

Kasimar dropped to the ground and groaned in pain while Raven sat down and looked embarrassed.

"I don't know what came over me." Mumbled Raven.

"Don't worry; we ALL wanted to do that." Said Lavender happily as she loked down at Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: Achievement unlocked; Raven kicks bully in balls!**

**Raven: I don't know why I did that … maybe it's because I was so angry that my favorite book series had been spoiled. I hope Kasimar won't try and hurt me … hey; I'm not stuttering! Maybe … maybe I'm not so shy, I just needed to … kick a bully in the balls, odd as that may be.**

**Kasimar: Totally worth it; the look of horror on her face was priceless! Yahaha … ouch.**

* * *

Oscar strode up next with a few objects. The objects were a piano, an anvil, and a wheel of a monster truck. Oscar took a deep breath and began to life them all at once.

"Whoa." Said Xaria in surprise at how strong Oscar was; in fact, strong was an understatement. He was barely breaking a sweat.

"So; what do you think?" Asked Oscar as he held the objects over him.

"Ok; that is amazing." Said Lavender sounding greatly impressed.

"How can anyone be that strong?" Asked Mable with her mouth agape.

"Years of training and working out." Shrugged Oscar. "Is this good enough for tonight?"

"Most definitely!" Nodded Lavender. "I don't think anyone could top you in physical strength; you know, if there was a weight lifting challenge we'd easily win because of you."

"Thanks; and that reminds me." Said Oscar as he put the stuff back down. "We have to decide on a leader don't we."

"I'll be the leader." Smirked Kasimar.

"You're not entitled to participate." Glared Oscar. "Me, Mable and Lavender were talking earlier and I suggested appointing someone as leader. What do the rest of you think?"

"Sounds good." Shrugged Xaria. "But I don't want to be the leader."

"My opinion is the same as Xaria's." Said Raven.

"Well; I was thinking of making Lavender the leader." Said Oscar but Kasimar didn't look happy with this revelation.

"No way! The day I let a ginger be in charge is the day you have permission to shoot me!" Snapped Kasimar.

"Do you hear that?" Asked Oscar. "It's the sound of no one caring! So; if you want Lavender to be the leader raise your hand."

Everyone besides Kasimar and Wallace raised their hands.

"Then it's settled; looks like Lavender is going to lead us." Said Oscar. "I guess all we have to do now is see Xaria's talent; I'm sure it'll be good."

"I hate to burst your muscular bubble but I don't really have a talent." Sighed Xaria. "The only thing I'm really good at and second to none in is pinball; but I can't really make that look exciting, can I?"

"So you're not going to audition" asked Mable.

"It's not that I don't want to; I just don't really have an actual talent." Shrugged Xaria.

"Are you sure?" Asked Lavender. "I'm positive you can do something."

"It's fine; don't worry about it. From my eyes it looks like the acts we'll be using are Oscar, Mable and you." Said Xaria. "I think this means we can take a break."

"I agree; though reading my book won't be as fun now that it's been spoiled." Sighed Raven.

As the team began to disperse Kasimar growled.

"This sucks; I can't do my talent and the cheerleader is in charge; life is so unfair!" Snarled Kasimar.

"Don't worry about it my henchman." Said Wallace professionally. "The cheating tonight shall more than make up for it. Mwuhahahahahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: The cheerleader is the leader!**

**Kasimar: I wonder what cheating Wallace has in mind; I really hope it hurts someone. It'll be like on that show one thousand ways to die; I watch it whenever I need cheap amusement. **

**Lavender: Wow; so I'm the leader, I wonder how this will end up. Hopefully it'll be smooth sailing but in life everything can go wrong at anytime.**

**Wallace: Mwuhahahahahahahahaha! What? I'm just practicing my evil laugh!**

* * *

Team Jungle were probably going to be able to pick their acts the fastest as they had the least people. They had chosen to do their auditions on the beach.

"Isn't this nice." Said Irene with a smile. "just the five of us alone on the beach of a nature filled island. And the lovely sea smell in the air; there are some things money just can't buy."

"Like a new arm." Said Vinnie as he glanced at his metal arm.

"Oh, err, sorry." Said Irene apologetically.

"Don't worry about it; what's done is done." Shrugged Vinnie. "So; who's going to audition first?"

"I will." Smiled Uzuri. "I've got a really good talent."

* * *

**Confessional: Woooooooooooot!**

**Tabitha: A talent involving amputation and screams no doubt.**

* * *

Uzuri's talent was not what Tabitha had expected; she got on the ground and began to spin like a pink, purple and blond blur. It seemed that her talent was extremely fast break dancing.

"Wheeeeeeeee!" Cheered Uzuri as she span.

"Can you add anything to that?" Asked Gary.

"I sure can!" Said Uzuri as she flipped upside now and span on her hands while maintaining perfect balance. She literally looked like a sort of tornado.

"I think that's really good." Said Tabitha as she watched Uzuri. "Can you move about while you do it?"

"No problem Tabitha; watch this." Said Uzuri as she started moving in a gradually increasing circular radius from her starting point.

"I think we've found our first act." Said Gary as he watched Uzuri in great interest.

"I concur buddy." Agreed Vinnie as he watched his crush spin. "She's really good."

* * *

**Confessional: Good as great green gravy! Very good!**

**Vinnie: How can someone balance that well? Man; Uzuri is just full of surprises. I wonder what she'll do next.**

**Gary: The way Vinnie watched Uzuri proves to me he's interested in her. Love makes the world go round … and what goes around comes around.**

* * *

Uzuri stopped spinning and flipped to her feet and then smiled.

"So how did I do?" Asked Uzuri as she shook some sand out of her hair. "Did you like it?"

"Five words; you are the first act." Said Tabitha with her usual false smile.

"Yay! Thanks everyone." Smiled Uzuri happily. "So who wants to have a go now?"

"I will." Said Vinnie. "Time to put 'pinchy' to some good use."

Vinnie walked over to a nearby tree and punched it with his metal arm; three cocoanuts fell to Vinnie's feet. He picked them up and walked back to the others.

"Cocoanuts; meet your maker." Chuckled Vinnie as he detached his metal hand and screwed on the pincers.

Vinnie picked up the first cocoanut and tossed it above him; when it came down he thrust his pincers upwards and cleanly sliced the cocoanut vertically in half. The second cocoanut was then thrown up; when it came down Vinnie sliced it horizontally in half.

"Time for a run through." Said Vinnie as he tossed up the final cocoanut and reared back; when it came down he punched his pincers forwards and impaled the cocoanut and it broke to pieces.

"Ta da." Said Vinnie as he smiled.

His team cheered and clapped for him. Vinnie took a bow and went back to his seat.

"That was really good." Said Irene. "I think Vinnie should be the second act."

"It was good; but maybe we should see all of the acts before we start to decide." Said Tabitha. "But good job Vinnie."

Gary raised his hand and looked deep in thought. Tabitha noticed this.

"What's up Gary?"

"Well; my talent is cooking but I can't really do that on the stage; what should I do?" Asked Gary.

"Hmmm; I'm not really sure." Pondered Tabitha. "Maybe you can just sit this one out, we won't hold it against you; I promise."

"Thanks Tabitha; it's a shame though, not all types of talents are possible in this challenge. I'm not too sure how well Chris thought it through." Mused Gary.

* * *

**Confessional: You can go through thoughts? Wow; you learn something new everyday huh?**

**Gary: Seriously; Chris has to iron out every aspect of loop holes and unfairness; I wonder if he even passed high school.**

**Chris: Shut up chef boy! I did pass high school and my challenges are awesome because I am Chris Maclean! Why can't people respect me?** (Chris begins to cry like a baby).

* * *

"Why do I get the feeling someone is crying?" Asked Gary.

"Beats me." Shrugged Irene. "Some people can sense other people's emotions pretty well."

"Would you like to go next Irene?" Asked Tabitha politely.

"Sure; thanks Tabitha." Smiled Irene as she picked up her saxophone and got up to the front. "As you can see my talent is the saxophone; hopefully it won't disappoint you."

Irene put the saxophone to her mouth and began to play it. A soothing melody amplified around the area and into the ears of each member of Team Jungle. It seemed to positively melt their minds and get rid of any negativity.

"That's a really nice tune." Said Vinnie as he tapped his foot to the general beat of the instrument.

"It's even better than the Gears of War theme song." Smiled Uzuri with a giggle.

"Is it a scary song?" Asked Vinnie.

"Not really; my favorite part is the line 'I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad, that the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had'. So macabre, Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri again.

Irene finished her saxophone solo and took a bow.

"Did you like it everyone? Do tell me what you thought." Said Irene.

The other four clapped for Irene; much louder than before as well.

"Good job Irene; I think it's quite reasonable to make you the next act." Said Tabitha as she clapped. "And I think Uzuri will be the first act."

"Looks like it's your turn to audition then Tabitha." Said Irene as she sat down.

Tabitha arose and got into position. The others wondered what their leader's talent could be; their answer came in the form of a pack of cards.

"Ok; I'm going to need a volunteer." Said Tabitha as she looked over her four team mates. "Would you give me a hand Uzuri."

"Of course Tabitha." Said Uzuri as she got up.

"I need you to pick a card; any card." Said Tabitha as she shuffled the deck of cards and held them out.

"Ok; I pick this one." Said Uzuri as she took one of the cards and looked at it; it was the five of clubs.

"Ok; now I'm going to shuffle the deck." Said Tabitha as Uzuri handed her the card and she shuffled them rapidly; after a few moments of shuffling Tabitha pulled a card out of the deck and showed it to Uzuri. "Is this your card?"

Uzuri was amazed; presented in front of her was the five of clubs. Tabitha had found her card.

"Amazing! How did you do that?" Asked Uzuri. "I've never been able to figure this trick out."

"A good magician never reveals his slash her secrets." Chuckled Tabitha as she put the cards away. "What do you think?"

"I like it … but will Chris like being outsmarted?" Asked Vinnie.

"Hmmm; good point; he may be a sore loser that he didn't win. Perhaps it would be safer if I didn't do this one." Said Tabitha coyly. "I think in that case it's safe to say that our acts are Uzuri, Vinnie and Irene." Said Tabitha. "With you guys as our representatives I feel we'll get second place at least."

* * *

**Confessional: I represent the nation of confessionals!**

**Tabitha: It's quite simple really; I'm not doing an act and as such I cannot be blamed if we lose. Neither can Gary so I'll still get good meals. That leaves a wide choice of scapegoats to vote off in case we come last. Still; it was good of Vinnie to mention Chris not liking it; it just makes by job even easier.**

**Irene: I got picked! Maybe I can win this for us. It'll make up for the fear challenge failure. **

**Uzuri: Break dancing is fun; I like the feeling I get when I get dizzy; it feels sooooo lovely! Teehee!**

* * *

A number of hours later the teams were ready to perform their acts. The nine performers were backstage while those who weren't competing were sitting in the audience. Chris walked onto the stage and basked in glory as the cameras focused on him.

"Hello viewers across the world! Welcome to the second Wawanakwa talent show; you may remember the last one, mainly due to the amount of puke, Haha! But this time it's going to be even better; we have nine acts coming on to perform tonight. But this time there is a twist."

There was a less than dramatic silence that lasted for a moment or two.

"Were you going to finish that thought?" Asked Wallace from his seat next to Kasimar.

"Yes; I was, and I will … now. This time I am going to be judging so make sure that your acts appeal to me because if they don't you may be walking the dock of shame and riding off into loserville! Haha!"

Chris laughed his usual trademark sadistic chuckle that he was known for and pulled out a piece of paper; one that had the acts and the order they were going in.

"Our first act tonight is going to be Jimmy … with stand up comedy! Hopefully there won't be any yo mamma jokes because I hate them … like a lot!" Said Chris in mild agitation as he left the stage. "So enjoy watching the kid mess up!"

Chris left the stage and walked to a chair and table that had been set up in front of the stage. He sat down as Jimmy walked out on stage.

* * *

**Confessional: Orange you glad I didn't say banana?**

**Chris: This ought to be good; there's no way that a ten year old could do anything talented … he better hope he has good jokes.**

**Barney: I'm getting a sudden urge to punch Chris with the force of all the seven seas.**

* * *

Jimmy lowered the microphone to his height and tapped it a few times.

"Hello; hello, is this thing on? Can you hear me at the back? Good! Hello everyone; it's great to be here tonight in … Wawanakwa." Began Jimmy as he started up his routine. "You know; this remind me of weddings; reminds me of last week when two TV antennae got married. The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was great!"

Most of the audience began to laugh; even Chris struggled to hide a smile.

"Continuing on the theme of weddings; I knew an invisible man who got married to an invisible woman." Said Jimmy before turning somber. "The children were nothing to look at either."

That one did the trick; everyone began laughing loudly; Chris was openly laughing as well. Only Kasimar remained silent.

"Oh; and before I go I have some news. A cow has been cloned this morning; seriously, no bull!" Said Jimmy as he struck a pose.

Everyone in the audience began to laugh and even Chris chuckled as well. Kasimar rolled his eyes at the sight of everyone else laughing.

"Ok, ok, I admit that those jokes were funny." Said Chris as he regained his serious exterior. "But you'll have to know more than puns to get a perfect ten; I therefore award you a nine."

Jimmy bowed and waved as he left the stage.

* * *

**Confessional: What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!**

**Jimmy: I think I did really good back there; I have absolutely no stage fright. I only hope Quana and Andy will do good as well. I'm sure they will.**

* * *

Backstage Andy was dressed in his 'Star Wars Kid' outfit again though he didn't have the helmet on yet. He was wondering how he could pass the time until his act; he wasn't going to be on for a while so he had time to kill.

"Pssst; matie." Whispered Barney from behind a curtain.

Andy turned and saw Barney concealed from the view of everyone besides himself. Andy walked over and raised an eyebrow.

"Why are you hiding yourself?" Asked Andy.

"So nobody sees me of course." Said Barney matter-of-factly. "Point is; I'm here to give you a lesson on wooing the mermaids … ladies that is."

"Ok … so what's my lesson, err, matie?" Asked Andy as he glanced around to make sure none of the others were listening.

"To make conversation." Said Barney wisely. "You see; a lot of girls love nothing more than someone who will listen to them while they talk. But what really impresses a girl is if you have something interesting to talk about. So go and put your words to good use."

Andy glanced over at Mable and turned back.

"But how do I … oh." Said Andy as Barney had disappeared.

* * *

**Confessional: Gone in the blink of an eye!**

**Barney: Now is the time I must step aside and watch me heartie student put his skills to use. All good teachers give their students a practical lesson.**

* * *

Seeing as Barney was gone Andy decided to try and put Barney's advice to use. He summed up his courage and walked over to Mable to start a conversation.

"Hi Mable; how's it going?" Asked Andy casually.

"It's going pretty good Andy; I'm going on next so hopefully I won't screw up." Said Mable as she looked over her pogo stick.

"I'm guessing your talent is pogoing then." Said Andy as he looked at Mable's pogo stick. "I'm not too good at it; my record is five bounces."

"My record is around seven hundred." Said Mable proudly. "So what's your talent going to be?"

"I'll be impersonating Darth Vader; hence my outfit." Said Andy as he gestured to his attire. "Star Wars is one of the few things not made in Japan."

"I'd like to go to Japan." Said Mable longingly. "All the oriental food and festivals … and the fact Nintendo is head quartered there."

"It's a good country; some may disagree but I like it." Said Andy with a smile. "You can probably tell but I'm Japanese in descent."

"I was sure you were Asian of some type." Nodded Mable. "Say … you're Japanese yet your name is Andy which isn't a Japanese name … why is that?"

"Well that's because my dad is Japanese and my mum is Canadian; my full name is Andy Takhashi, I took my dad's surname and my mum gave me my first name." Explained Andy as he straightened his outfit. "But legally I'm Japanese."

"Finding out the history of a family can be fascinating." Said Mable as she checked over her pogo stick to make sure it was ready for her act. "I have my roots in Africa but I'd like to know if I have any famous ancestors somewhere along the line."

"Now it's time for Mable to go pogo a gogo!" Called Chris from out in the audience.

"Bad pun alert, bad pun alert, bad pun alert!" Yelled Barney from the audience as well.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris.

"Well; nice talking to you Andy; but I've got to win this for my team."

"Good luck." Waved Andy as Mable bounced out onto the stage.

* * *

**Confessional: First she bounced 1.4 meters in the air … then she bounced meters in the air. Am I making myself clear?**

**Mable: I think that went really well; I scored pretty decently and Chris actually seemed jealous that while I'm an expert he can't even figure out how to get the pogo stick out of the box. It was nice of Andy with me good luck despite him being my opponent; what a good sport. He'll make some girl very happy if he's into that kind of thing. I don't adverse it either. **

**Andy: That went pretty well; maybe listening to Barney isn't such a bad idea.**

* * *

Mable scored an eight and bounced backstage while Chris looked on his list to see who was next.

"The next person tonight is going to be … Vinnie with some block breaking; it'll make sense when we see it. Come on out Mr. Handicap!" Called Chris.

"That was politically incorrect!" Said Xaria with a glare.

"That's what makes it funny! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

"I agree; the more offensive the better." Chuckled Kasimar.

Vinnie walked out as a few interns quickly set up some wood and other materials for Vinnie to break.

Vinnie stood in front of the first object; a thick plank of wood. He raised his metal arm and slashed it downwards. The wood was sliced in half. Vinnie didn't wait for any applause and moved on to the next object.

This one was a large log; it looked like a downward slice may not break this one. Vinnie reared back and gave the log a run through like the cocoanut from earlier. It split into pieces and fell to the ground.

The audience applauded but Vinnie's act was not over yet. He moved over to the last object he had to break; it was a sheet of thin aluminum; this probably couldn't be snapped.

"What's he going to do now?" Asked Chris with a yawn. "Bend it like Peckham?"

"I believe the term in Beckham." Corrected Tabitha.

"Don't correct me; you're dumb and I'm awesome!" Whined Chris.

On stage Vinnie reared his arm back and it began to twirl like a drill; he rammed it forwards into the metal and sparks flew all around. The audience 'ooed' in enjoyment of the act as Vinnie destroyed the metal. A moment later Vinnie bought his arm upwards and the metal was cleaved in two.

"Shaboom." Said Vinnie as he bowed.

"It was ok; I liked the sparks … but should I count it? You had the unfair advantage of a metal arm."

"Hmm; should I do to you what I did to the metal? You have an annoyingly big ego." Said Vinnie as he raised his arm.

"Ok! No need to threaten me; you get an eight." Said Chris in fear.

"Thank you." Said Vinnie as he walked backstage happily.

* * *

**Confessional: Threaten settin.**

**Vinnie: I might have had a low score then if it weren't for the fact Chris is a complete and utter coward. It's a good idea to know the weaknesses of your foes.**

**Chris: … … Shut up! **(Chris stars to cry).

* * *

As Vinnie left back stage the next person to walk on was Lavender; she had two large cheerleader pompoms colored bright blood red on her hands.

"Up next we have Lavender with cheerleading." Said Chris as he laughed. "This is going to be so awful … I think I might enjoy this! Haha!"

Lavender glared at Chris but had a sudden idea; it was risky and may make her seem weasely … but it may get her a high score. The music began and Lavender began the cheer.

_Chris is awesome; he's so great_

_He's so perfect he's never late_

_With great breath and perfect hair_

_We should be thankful we're under his care!_

_Maclean; go Chris_

_Maclean; go Chris_

* * *

**Confessional: How come nobody ever makes a cheer about me huh?**

**Lavender: Looking back on it that was embarrassing and kinda stupid … but if it made us win then I guess it was in my best long term interests to take one for the team.**

**Chris: **(He has tears of joy in his eyes). **That was beautiful! It almost makes up for the fact she has red hair. I love being me!**

* * *

"Well; after that awesome cheer full of great, inspirational, original, wonderful and heart warming lyrics I award Lavender a perfect ten!" Said Chris as he cried in joy.

"Thank you, thank you!" Said Lavender happily as she bowed.

Kasimar sat annoyed in his seat; Lavender had sucked up to Chris and been awarded a good score. That was unforgivable in his opinion … though it may have had something to do with his prejudice. He glanced at Wallace next to him and saw he was tinkering with a bomb that had a red button. Kasimar grabbed it and pressed the button.

"Get off the stage ginger!" Jeered Kasimar as he threw the bomb towards Lavender.

BANG!

The force of the bomb knocked Lavender off the stage and right into Barney's arms. Both the pirate and the cheerleader looked surprised at this turn of events and mildly blushed.

"What; no flowers?" Joked Barney.

"Barney; people are watching … I mean; just let me go please." Said Lavender with a furious blush as she got back to her feet. "This means nothing."

"Aye-aye captain." Nodded Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: Ship tease at the show!**

**Lavender: That meant nothing! It was a pure fluke! Though it was fortunate he caught me or I may have hurt myself. Still; wild hair is kind of 'in' at the moment and I did like pirates of the Caribbean … NO!**

**Barney: Wow; that's the first time a girl has been practically touching me. Yohohoho! And her skin was very soft as well; what can I say? I'm a Casanova of the waves!**

* * *

As Lavender went backstage again Chris announced the next act.

"The next act is going to be from Team Jungle; it's Uzuri and she'll be doing some … spinning of some kind." Said Chris as he sipped a bit of his latté.

Uzuri ran on stage and quickly got into a sitting position.

"Prepare to become dizzy by watching me get dizzy!" Giggled Uzuri.

Uzuri began to break dance and spin very fast; it was a wonder she didn't lose her focus from the inevitable dizziness. After a few moments she got upside down and span on her head. It was impressive to watch but Chris looked bored.

"Ok; I think I've seen enough." Yawned Chris. "You get six and you should be thankful it isn't less. Nobody is allowed to bore THE Chris Maclean."

Uzuri stopped her routine and looked at Chris for a moment.

"You're ugly." Said Uzuri simply as she left the stage.

Chris looked horrified and growled.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm not ugly! I'm hot!**

**Chris: How dare that nobody call me ugly! Who does she think she is? Raaaaarrr!**

**Uzuri: I'd like to see Chris go on stage and perform; then he'll see how hard it is to pick a talent that will hopefully be goo enough for the soul eating judges.**

* * *

From backstage a disc was inserted into the CD player and a certain track was chosen. Music began to amplify around the amphitheatre.

"Oh not that bullcrap." Growled Kasimar in disgust.

Andy marched out on stage with his Darth Vader outfit, helmet and toy light saber. He reached the center of the stage and swung about the glowing toy dramatically before turning his head to the audience.

"Luke; I am your father!" Said Andy in his dark evil voice.

"This is so exciting." Said Jimmy from backstage. "I wonder what he'll do next."

Andy swung the light saber some more and marched a few paces before speaking once more.

"I have the death sentence on twelve systems." Said Andy dramatically once more.

Andy swung the light saber a little more and marched to the other side of the stage. What he didn't notice was the pool of slippery clear liquid on the floor. He put a foot in it and slipped over onto his back.

"The time is right for evil." Chuckled Wallace as he pressed a button on his remote.

"What just happened?" Asked Andy; his eyes widened as he liked above. "Oh crap!"

As Andy said this a number of bowling balls fell down on him; a particularly solid one fell right down onto his arm which was left at an odd angle.

"Err … YOWCH!" Yelled Andy as he groaned in pain; he may have had a high pain resistance but this was really bad.

"Ok; who's next?" Asked Chris.

"Andy's hurt!" Snapped Barney. "He needs medical attention!"

"He's fine." Shrugged Chris.

"Want me to give you a Polish Charlie Horse?" Threatened Barney.

"Ok; fine! Get the corpse off stage Chef."

"I'm still alive you asshole!" Growled Andy before he winced in pain.

"Oh shut up!" Growled Chris. "You get a four because you amused me even though your talent stunk."

* * *

**Confessional: Arm harm.**

**Andy: **(His right arm is in a sling). **This puts a little unbalance on my chances of winning; but I'm a fast healer. Well; at least I'm a leftie anyway. I hope we don't lose.**

* * *

Oscar had finished his act and scored an eight. This was decent but he wondered how Andy was doing. He may have been his opponent but he didn't want anyone to get hurt as he was a good sport.

"Good job Oscar." Smiled Lavender. "That's two eights and a ten. I think we stand a good chance of winning.

"I know; but did you see what happened to Andy? He looked really in pain." Said Oscar in concern. "It was a trap; this has Wallace written all over it."

"Well; maybe if we lose we can get rid of him … but I really want to get rid of Kasimar." Sighed Lavender. "We have a hard decision ahead of us."

"We'll cross that bridge when the time comes." Nodded Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: Bridge out!**

**Wallace: Yes! My trap worked! I'm so evil and nobody had better mess with me because I'd defeat them as I'm evil! Mwahahahahaha! Still; Andy looked in a lot of pain … I'll just send him a get well card, that'll shut him up.**

* * *

Next to go on stage was Irene; she nervously held her saxophone; if she messed this up then her team would lose and then she stood a chance of getting voted off. But she was pretty skilled at the instrument so maybe this wouldn't be too hard.

"Ok Irene; your talent is the saxophone right?" Asked Chris from his seat.

"That's right; I'm going to be making some music for us." Said Irene.

"Well; off you go; I want to end this soon as I'm running out of latté and I need a refill." Said Chris as he beckoned Irene to start.

Irene put the saxophone to her lips and began to play the same soothing tune from earlier; it was just as good as before but with the night sky and darkness around if created such a strong atmosphere and rhythm. Everyone's attention was on Irene besides Kasimar. This was a really good talent.

"Ok; stop!" Said Chris with tears in his eyes. "Anything that can reduce me to tears of joy is worth a good score. Despite being a girl you are actually talented; I give you a ten!"

Irene smiled; she didn't know whether to thank Chris for the perfect score or throttle him for his mild sexism. She ended up just nodding and exiting the stage.

"Good job Irene." Said Vinnie as he shook Irene's hand with his organic arm.

"Thanks; though from the score we've ended up with we can't beat Team Jungle." Said Irene as she glanced over at the Team Jungle performers. "Our total score is twenty four while they have twenty six. But Team Puzzle has so far got fifteen; they need a perfect ten to come second so we still have a chance of losing."

"Well Quana may be a good singer but she might get a nine or lower." Said Vinnie positively.

"The final act of the night is Quana!" Called Chris from the audience.

Quana strode past Vinnie and Irene looking excited and determined.

"We're hosed." Said Irene and Vinnie simultaneously.

* * *

**Confessional: It all comes down to this.**

**Irene: What happens now? I pray; I pray we don't lose.**

* * *

Quana strode out onto the stage and looked out into the audience; her team was smiling for her. But Kasimar's facial expression was … unsettling, to put it lightly.

"Ok Quana; what song are you going to be singing?" Asked Chris. "I hope there is a lot of me in it."

"There's no 'me' in team; and this song is about team spirit." Said Quana with a smirk. "I call this song 'The Puzzle of Wawanakwa'."

Quana signaled an intern off stage to turn on the music; he did so and a familiar song started to play. It was an instrumental of the Pokémon theme song. Chris had no time to complain as Quana began to sing.

_I wanna be the sole survivor_

_Of Total Drama season 2_

_This crazy island is my real test_

_Coming first place is my goal_

_But to stand a single chance_

_I will need all of my team mates_

_We'll work together; defeat the rest_

_Our journey has began_

_Team Puzzle_

_It's the very best team_

_Like something from a lovely dream_

_Team Puzzle_

_With no bullies or goons_

_Our talents are full of boons _

_Every challenge that we must face_

_We shall simply sweep aside_

_One by one; they'll all go down_

_Until only we are left_

_Come with us_

_Live the dream_

_Go al all the way to the end_

_And maybe stop for ice cream_

_Team Puzzle_

_It's the very best team_

_Like something from a lovely dream_

_Team Puzzle_

_With no bullies or goons_

_Our talents are full of boons _

_Though it will be far from easy_

_Full of much danger too_

_We can combine our strength_

_And buff up our defense_

_Team Puzzle go above and beyond_

_The call of duty by far_

_I've just one more thing to say_

_You'd better be prepared_

_Team Puzzle_

_It's the very best team_

_Like something from a lovely dream_

_Team Puzzle_

_With no bullies or goons_

_Our talents are full of boons _

Quana bowed and smiled as the music stopped. The audience all clapped; even Kasimar though he was preoccupied with staring at her. Chris however looked deep in thought.

"Hmmmm; it was good. But I don't know if it was good enough." Said Chris with a sigh.

"Why not?" Asked Quana in surprise.

"Well there are a number of reasons; but it can be traced to one particular factor … you didn't mention how awesome I am!" Explained Chris smugly. "Therefore I award you a nine because the song was good … but it's still not enough for you to win! Haha!"

Quana blinked and growled at Chris.

"You're a nasty sadistic sexist you jerkass!" Snapped Quana angrily. "I hope you get your karma eventually!"

* * *

**Confessional: Karma Houdini?**

**Quana: What is with Chris? He's fairly sexist, a completely self absorbed jerkass, a bully and a vile sadist! Karma is going to strike him like lightning on a pole.**

**Chris: Oh contraire girl! I'm so awesome that I am immune to bad karma; I could rule the universe if I was interested in politics!**

* * *

Quana stormed backstage while Chris blinked and shrugged. He rose to his feet and took out his megaphone.

"Attention flat character campers! The talent show is over and we have winners and losers! In first place with twenty six points is Team Grenade; as such they win today's special prize … a CD of my song 'I am god' to enjoy whenever they want!"

"Wait; you had a CD and you called it 'I am God'. How much more self absorbed can you be?" Asked Xaria in disgust.

"Shut up!" Growled Chris. "Anyway; in second place and narrowly avoiding elimination with a total of twenty four points is Team Jungle!" said Chris which was good news for Tabitha indeed. "Team Jungle isn't going to be the weakest team for much longer because after tonight Team Puzzle will only have five members remaining. So pick your favorite loser and report to the bonfire ceremony in half an hour; in the meantime I'm going to gel my hair, I've got two split ends, TWO!"

Chris arose and left to his luxury trailer. His hair gel was calling him and who would Chris be to ignore his only friends? The campers from backstage came out to their team mates in the audience. Those on Team Grenade were happy while those of Team Puzzle were disappointed.

"I can't believe it." Sighed Quana. "I lost just because I didn't suck up to Chris. Is it wrong that I prefer to sing about things that appeal to me?"

"Not at all." Said Spider as he glanced up at large moon. "Chris *cough* is probably jealous he can't sing *cough* for toffee … come to think of it I can't *cough* sing either."

"Thanks spider." Smiled Quana before sighing. "But now we've got to vote someone off; it was an easy choice when Nakia was here and I guess after Zita stole my microphone it wasn't so hard … but everyone left on the team is so nice … who should I vote for?"

"I don't know … Andy's injured *cough* but I just don't know." Said Spider. "He and *cough* I are good friends."

"Well … we've got half an hour to think." Said Quana regretfully. "Funny how almost everyone on our team is nice isn't it?"

"True; it'll make the vote offs a lot harder." Agreed Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: As hard as Chef's muffins … like a rock!**

**Lavender: My first day as the leader and we win! Maybe this won't be so bad; hopefully we'll win the next challenge as well. It's been eight days since the contest started and my team has only lost once. Might as well have called ourselves Team Unbeatable … though that would probably jinx it.**

**Tabitha: This wasn't such a hard challenge; it may have been cutting it close but we still succeeded. First place wasn't really important this time around … or at least it was until I found out the prize was garbage. So the five of us are all through to the next challenge. And now Team puzzle will be as small as us … but Team Grenade is still the main threat. Still; a job well done for me today.**

**Kasimar: Heh; this was pretty good; I didn't have to do anything and I've survived another day. I admit I wanted to perform … but sometimes you don't get what you want. Like I don't want Lavender in charge; not only is she a girl but she's a ginger! But all that political incorrectness aside I had fun today; especially spoiling Raven's book! Yahahaha!**

* * *

Andy had exited the medical tent a while ago and had his right arm in a sling. This was pretty bad luck. At least the stars looked great up in the night sky. Maybe he could enjoy them after the bonfire ceremony if he survived it as Jimmy had told him they had lost.

"Ahoy hoy me heartie!" Waved Barney as he approached Andy.

"Hey Barney; how's it going?" Asked Andy as positively as he could make it.

"I'm doing fine; but the real question at the moment is are you ok? You look more banged up than a shipwreck!" Exclaimed Barney as he looked at Andy's cast.

"Well it doesn't hurt that much; but it's definitely not something I'm enjoying." Sighed Andy. "One of those randomly placed bowling balls fell on my arm with such force that it … dislocated my shoulder."

"Oh dear; I've never had that happen but I know it's nothing good. Can't someone pop it back in?"

"Chef Hatchet … well; Nurse Hatchet, doesn't know how to and the rest of the medical staff are at Playa Des Losers. So until further notice I'm left with a _slight_ disadvantage." Explained Andy as he looked up at the night sky. "I wonder what to do now."

"Well; if I could get it back in I would me heartie." Said Barney apologetically. "The ceremonies in about ten minutes; after you cast your vote I'll walk with you if you want. If you want I could try and uncover who did this, I'll make em pay by the power of the Atlantic!"

"Thanks Barney; you're a true friend." Smiled Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: What about me? I'm a friend too!**

**Andy: Well; this could be my last time using this thing … but maybe fate will smile upon me; shocking things happened last season and they might happen now. Well; I vote for Eleanor; nothing personal at all but I don't know who else to vote for.**

**Jimmy: I'm voting for Andy; it's not that I don't like him; he's my bud! It's just that with that injury he'll probably suffer if he stays here; not only that but he won't be able to fend off Kasimar. Sorry Andy.**

* * *

Team Puzzle sat around the bonfire for the third time since the teams were formed and they didn't look very happy. Spider sat off to the side on a stump thinking to himself and occasional glancing at Quana. Quana herself was sitting on a log next to Jimmy looking at her shoes while twiddling with her thumbs. Eleanor sat on a stump looking at an owl in a nearby tree that hooted every now and then. Andy and Barney were sitting next to each other on a log; Barney looked excited and also worried for his friend.

"Don't worry too much Andy; even in the event you do get voted off you can take pride that you got to the eighth day, right?" Smiled Barney.

"Thanks Barney … I wonder when Chris is going to arrive; he's always late."

Speak of the devil and they will arrive; at that moment Chris walked into the Bonfire Ceremony clearing. He stood by his oil drum like always and put the tray of marshmallows down. This time there was only five marshmallows on the tray; the fewest amount Team Puzzle had seen so far.

Chris looked upon the team and laughed.

"Forget Team Jungle sucking; you guys might be the new losing team. And you've made this episode great … mainly because of Andy getting an injury." Laughed Chris sadistically as he wiped a happy tear from his eye.

"Oh go saw of your ankle!" Said Andy as he flipped Chris the bird with his left hand.

"Temper, temper." Smirked Chris. "Just so you guys know; the fewer people on your Team the harder it will become to win challenges. So try not to have like two left eventually. Haha."

Chris laughed again and the team sighed.

"Get on with it." Said Quana dully.

"Fine; spoil the drama." Frowned Chris. "I have five marshmallows and there are six of you. When I call your name come and get a marshmallow. That means you are safe and go through to the next day. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … that means you are out … and you can't come back … *ever*."

Andy, Jimmy and Eleanor looked nervous while Barney looked confident. Spider and Quana just sat silently and looked at the marshmallows.

"The first marshmallow of the night goes to … Jimmy; come on up." Said Chris as he picked up the first marshmallow.

"Woohoo! I'm still in it to win it." Cheered Jimmy as he claimed his marshmallow and savored the sugary flavor.

"Barney."

"Spider."

"Quana."

Chris picked up the final marshmallow on the tray and held it up for Andy and Eleanor to see.

"This is the final marshmallow of the night; the person who does not get it must immediate leave. Who's it gonna be?"

Andy shook in nervousness while Eleanor gulped.

"Good luck matie." Said Barney with a thumbs up."

"Don't interrupt me!" Saud Chris angrily. "Anyway; the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Eleanor."

Eleanor smiled; she was quite relieved that she was still in. As Eleanor walked up to claim her marshmallow Andy sighed and slumped in his seat.

"Sorry Andy." Said Chris while not sounding sorry at all. "Looks like you'll never become an astronaut; yep, nobody can live their dreams except me because I'm Chris Maclean. Now get out of here and off the island. Haha!"

"You're worse than the Borg you asswipe." Said Andy as he flipped Chris off. Andy turned to his team and nodded.

"I understand guys; I guess I wasn't so useful with this injury. And I may have been at an unfair disadvantage. I guess I'll see you around."

"Hang on a moment Andy; I know what'll turn that frown upside down." Said Barney as he grinned his genki grin. "Getting your cast sighed!"

Barney took a marker pen out from nowhere and began to sign Andy's cast. When he finished it read the words 'Don't listen to Chris; you'll be the first man on Mars buddy; sighed Barney'.

"Thanks Barney." Said Andy as the two shook hands. "Anybody else want to sign it?"

The other four agreed and soon Andy's cast had five positive signatures.

"Well; goodbye guys, it's been fun. I'll be rooting for you." Said Andy as he shook hands with Eleanor, Jimmy and Quana and shared a fist bump with Barney.

"See you around my friend." Said spider as he held out his hand. Andy smiled and shook it.

"Good luck Spider." Said Andy as he gave Spider the Vulcan salute.

Andy strode away to the dock of shame and climbed aboard the boat of losers. As the boat started off into the night a meteor shower began in the cloudless starry sky.

"Wow." Said Andy with a smile as he sat down to admire the sky. "This is a nice way to end my time on the show."

As the boat sped away from the island Chris walked to the dock of shame and looked at the camera.

"What the hell? Why wasn't everyone laughing at Andy's injury? They should have pushed him down and spat on him! This team is so boring!" Yelled Chris angrily and in great frustration. "Well; nine campers have left the island; we're down to seventeen. What will the next challenge be? Who will be the tenth camper to walk the dock of shame? Will Kasimar get anymore awesome? And will a latté chocolate bar ever be crated? Find out most of these questions next time on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

Votes

Andy- Eleanor

Barney- Eleanor

Eleanor- Andy

Jimmy- Andy

Quana- Andy

Spider- Andy

Andy- 4

Eleanor- 2

And thus Andy's time on Wawanakwa has drawn to a close. Now … I know what you're thinking. "Whaaaaaaat? Andy's been voted off and he hasn't hooked up with Mable? What the hell are you thinking?" Well don't worry; I have a plan, I'll leave it at that.

Next up is the second aftermath so fans of Eddie and Sasha can rejoice.

As a small spoiler day nine's challenge will be based on one of my favorite video game series. It'll really be clean as a _whistle_.

And for those of you who want to know the instrumental song Quana was singing to in the auditions was the Aquaria Towers theme from Spyro 2; it's on youtube if you want to hear it.


	18. Total Ousted Alphabet 2

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the 'Season that Must Never Be Named'. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. And let's not forget that I also do not own the alphabet theme; that was first created by Frank15 so thank you to him.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains hair related discrimination, Twilight bashing and discussing the concept of eating tissue. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable VinniexUzuri GaryxRaven and a secret couple.

**Note:** Here is the second episode of Total Ousted Alphabet. Eddie and Sasha are back and they will be interviewing the losers from episodes five through to eight. So sit back and read on because who know; you might just learn something.

**Review Answers**

**Bad-Asp:** Yep; Wallace and Kasimar are hanging on by a thread. They just happen to be on a strong team. But don't worry; in this story karma does exist. (Laughs evilly).

**Haters Go To Heaven:** Thanks for the long review; I'm glad you think it was the best chapter yet; but hopefully it will get even better as time goes on. Oh; and only Wallace applauded Kasimar; the others just sarcastically clapped once.

**colbyleebrown:** I haven't forgotten about CCS. I just lost interest and to be honest I bit off more than I could chew before my writing skills were goo enough. For now it's over but I may return to it someday. Also; next time you review try to make it about the story, otherwise just PM me. :)

* * *

A large stage room in Playa Des Losers was crowded with an audience of many people both old and young. Some had popcorn or other snacks. In front of them was a stage. On it was a trio of arm chairs and a large three rowed sofa. Sitting in the bottom row of the sofa from left to right was Daisy, Nakia, Carlton, Fifi and Patch, the latter of which was picking his nose. Sitting on one of the three arm chairs was Eddie Lynmoire and on the arm chair next to him sat Sasha Tasset who was currently playing a game on her DS. The cameramen aimed their cameras at the stage and one of the interns gave the signal.

"You're on it three, two, one." Said the intern as he stood behind a camera.

Eddie and Sasha looked to the camera and waved. The lights from above shined on them and all attention was on both the host and hostess.

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Said Eddie with a wave of greeting.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Smiled Sasha as she paused her DS game.

"No relation." Added Eddie.

"That joke wasn't funny in the first show and it isn't now." Said Sasha flatly.

"But I've got to let the new viewers who missed the last episode know that we're not related." Explained Eddie logically.

"It's obvious looking at us that we aren't related." Said Sasha sensibly. "We're friends and co-hosts, nothing more and nothing less."

"Fair enough." Agreed Eddie. "Now; welcome back to another installment of Total Ousted Alphabet. It has been only one hour since the eighth day ended and now we have four new guests to interview."

"But before we do that I think we should reintroduce those we interviewed last time." Smiled Sasha as she gestured to the five campers sitting on the big sofa.

"About time you noticed us." Said Daisy rudely.

"That was Daisy." Said Eddie. "She was officially the first camper voted off."

"Don't forget me." Said Patch as he chewed on a chocolate bar wrapper.

"I won't. That was Patch; the big eater eliminated at the same time as Daisy but overall the second voted off due to a technicality." Said Sasha cheerfully.

"Next up we have our reformed feminist Fifi who is still campaigning for women's rights and now has some friends." Said Eddie as Fifi smiled and waved to the audience.

"After Fifi we have Nakia; our resident spoiled Libby with the nice hair." Said Eddie with a forced smile. Truth be told he wasn't too fond of Nakia.

Nakia said nothing as she was busy brushing her hair as she had been for the past hour.

"And last but not least is Carlton; a guy with many fears that sometimes border on irrational, but a good heart nonetheless." Said Sasha as she finished the introduction.

"Don't shine those lights on me … I'm scared of bright light." Said Carlton fearfully.

"No surprise there." Said Sasha with a shrug. "Last time we interviewed all of these five; there was blue jelly, a Freudian Excuse, some anger and overall a lot of good conversation!"

"And a lot has happened on Wawanakwa Island since then. Scary fear facing, an explosive and swash buckling boat race, a challenge that would scare even Jigsaw and of course; a talent show full of heartbreak … and arm break." Recapped Eddie enthusiastically. "It makes me wonder if it's really that brilliant being on the show."

"Well; if you get on then you do have a chance for a million big ones." Said Sasha. "With that money I could make my own video game. Maybe it could be a three way war between Robot Mexican Pirates, Brains with eyes and penguin people."

"That sounds interesting; if it was made I might buy it. But now we've got to move onto our first guest of the night." Said Eddie with a clap of his hands. "She's an excellent swimmer, she's afraid of Uzuri's emo doll; she has two big pig tails and she bares her midriff. Please welcome Yessica!"

Yessica walked out from the left side of the stage and waved to the audience. The audience applauded but it wasn't particularly thunderous or overwhelming. She sat down on the arm chair near Eddie and Sasha and smiled.

"Welcome to Total Ousted Alphabet Yessica; how does it feel to be here?" Asked Eddie.

"It's pretty good as I get some screen time. I haven't had a lot recently; that's a side effect of being voted off I guess." Said Yessica with a sigh. "But it's been great at the Playa."

"I like it here as well." Agreed Eddie with a nod. "I'm guessing you like the swimming pools the most eh?"

"Absolutely; the water is cool and fresh, the diving boards are great and the pool side drink bar has actually got pineapple and mango smoothies. They're my favorite drink." Said Yessica with a big smile. "It's a lot better here than at Wawanakwa."

"So Yessica; how does it feel to have been voted off so early?" Asked Sasha sympathetically. "It can't be fun right?"

"Well it is kind of a disappointment I didn't last very long. A million dollars would have really been good. But I was voted out and you can't change the past." Explained Yessica as she relaxed on the arm chair. "And I get to spend all my time here; I still have over two weeks of sun and swimming."

"How are you getting along with the others losers; the ones eliminated before you that is." Inquired Sasha as she pointed to the five commentators.

"Well it's a bit mixed; I tried to get along with Daisy but … she's just mean all the time." Said Yessica as she glanced over at the bratty teachers pet.

"Because I'm someone and you're no one." Sneered Daisy; Fifi silenced her with a whack on the back of the head.

"Patch is ok when he isn't farting. He holds no hard feelings over me voting for him on day one." Smiled Yessica. "I'd say he's pretty likable."

"Friends and food make the world go round." Said Patch as he ate another chocolate bar."

"Fifi is one of my best friends though; she's actually really nice." Said Yessica while smiling towards Fifi.

"She was on my side at the island and let me explain and apologies for my attitude." Said Fifi from her seat. "Real friends listen to each other."

"Bang on there Fifi." Agreed Eddie.

"I don't really like Nakia; yes I know you're right there Nakia." Said Yessica as she had noticed Nakia snarling. "I just don't like prejudice people very often and hair discrimination is pretty … pathetic. Though I'd be your friend if you just apologized to Spider."

"The day I apologize to Spider is the day you have permission to shave my hair off." Snapped Nakia snidely. "He's nothing but a useless, ugly, uneducated, inbred freak; the type of person that should be removed from society."

"Ok; now tell us how you _really_ feel." Said Eddie sarcastically.

"Good one Eddie." Laughed Sasha. "So; what about Carlton? Is he a friend or enemy?"

"To be honest I hardly see him." Shrugged Yessica. "This show is one of the only times I've seen him since I've got here."

"That's because I stay in my room away from the scary things in the world." Explained Carlton. "And you have waves on your shirt … and waves scare me."

"Wimp!" Jeered Daisy.

Eddie nodded to Sasha and Sasha opened a hatch on the arm of her chair; she pressed one of the buttons. Instantly a large amount of blue jelly fell down on Daisy though thankfully missed the others.

"AAAAAAAARGH! My cloths!" Screamed Daisy as she ran off stage while the audience laughed and applauded.

"That one never gets old." Laughed Eddie.

"You mean you've done it before?" Said Yessica in surprise.

"We did it last aftermath when she was basically being a complete bully." Explained Sasha as she closed the hatch on the chair arm. "Now for another question; when did you get into swimming?"

"Well; I was like a duck to water really." Smiled Yessica in remembrance. "I just liked the water; the wet feeling along your skin when you submerge underwater just appealed to me. Plus I seemed to be naturally talented at swimming."

"Have you ever won any competitions?" Asked Sasha with interest.

"A few; but I didn't bring the trophy's with me." Said Yessica. "Shame really; some of them are super shiny due to the weekly polishing."

"Last question … would you like to know who voted for you on the night of your elimination?" Asked Eddie hesitantly.

"Sure; who was it?" Asked Yessica.

"Well … it was Uzuri, Gary, Hector … and Tabitha." Said Eddie. "And you may be surprised to hear this … but Tabitha isn't as nice as she claims to be."

"What? Really?" Said Yessica in great surprise. "That's so … unlikely! She's been nothing but nice whenever she's with us."

"But you haven't seen her in the confessionals have you?" Asked Eddie seriously and somberly.

"No; confessionals are private." Said Yessica. "Or at least that's what I think."

"Well; would you like to see a confessional Tabitha made after you were voted off?" Offered Sasha.

"Ok then. I really don't know what to expect." Murmured Yessica as a large TV screen was lowered from above and a clip began to play.

* * *

_The screen shows Tabitha sitting in the confessional looking very smug indeed. She laughs to herself and begins to speak._

_Tabitha: It's quite simple really; I am very charismatic. Getting Uzuri's vote was simple and Gary, while a little harder, was easy since I know where he is vulnerable. I'm guessing Irene and Yessica voted or Uzuri though I don't know who Hector and Vinnie voted for … but that's not important. If you're a major antagonist you mustn't let your goals get too high. I may have only just managed to get Yessica voted off … but that small bit made all the difference. And as long as I succeed I have no need to worry about elimination._

* * *

The clip ended and as the TV screen rose up again Yessica looked shocked and astonished.

"So … Tabitha is evil?" Said Yessica with a blink.

"Wow … didn't see that coming." Said Fifi blankly.

"Well; we can't do anything about it now." Sighed Sasha. "But you had a right to know. But now I think it's time for some fan mail."

Eddie reached behind his chair and pulled out a small sack of letters. He took one out and began to open it.

"Let's see what the fans have to ask you. They might even compliment you." Smiled Eddie as he opened the letter and began to read. "This one has been sent by Natz. Yessica; you're nice … but you're kind of boring. You may be interesting as far as swimming goes and you're also friendly but you didn't do much. I'm not sure if I like you or not; From Natz. Ok; that was a waste of paper."

"I'm not boring." Said Yessica with a frown. "I have interesting quirks."

"It's just the fans opinion; it's called 'fan dumb' for a reason." Chuckled Sasha.

Eddie screwed up the useless letter and tossed it behind his chair. He took out another letter and opened it up.

"Ok; how about this. To Yessica; your hair is nice. Though it is nowhere near as good as Nakia's hair it still has its perks. The double pig tail look is great … though Nakia is just something more. From Payton … that was stupid." Grumbled Eddie as he tossed the letter behind the chair.

"I didn't think it was so bad; it was quite a lovely letter." Said Nakia with a foul sweet smile.

"I didn't think so; I mean; was she complimenting me or comparing me to you?" Said Yessica with a raised eyebrow. "Is there any letters that have meaning to them?"

Edie rooted through the bag and came out with a letter in a blue envelope. It had a bulge in it as well. The teen detective opened it and took out the letter and a bag of jelly beans.

"Err … you do like jelly beans don't you?" Asked Eddie.

"Yep! Especially the blue ones … though they are quite rare." Smiled yessica as Eddie handed her the bag.

"Ok; this letter is from someone called Ally. Yessica; it was so unfair that you were voted off! Tabitha should have kept you and gotten rid of Hector or Irene; you had so much potential. Not only that but Tabitha must have felt pretty stupid when she found out the next challenge involved water. Pretty ironic huh? Take care and enjoy the jelly beans! Signed Ally." Eddie smiled after finishing the letter and looked content. "At least there are some fans who care for the under dogs. My mum always says a little kindness goes a long way."

"I agree." Said Yessica as she swallowed a few jelly beans. "And to be honest I was disappointed I couldn't do the water challenge; I'm as good at rowing as I am at swimming. Oh and Ally; if you're watching this then thanks for the positive letter!"

"It's been great talking to you yessica; I feel that we've learned more about you now than what we saw on the show itself. But we've got to move on to our next guest so could you go and sit by Carlton?" Asked Sasha as Eddie put the bag of letters behind the chair.

"No problem; it was nice talking to you two." Smiled Yessica as she got up, winked to the audience and sat down again next to Carlton who whimpered in fright.

"You know; I think yessica kind of looks like Bridgette." Said Sasha with a finger to her chin. "And Bridgette looks like Princess Peach."

"You sure know your video games … but then again the Mario series is so famous practically everyone alive knows his name." Said Eddie before frowning. "Curse those stupid lakitu's; how are you supposed to get past that guy? He's always out of reach! But one day I _will_ have my revenge."

"Sure you will." Said Sasha with a giggle before turning to the audience. "Our second guest of the night was best friends with a chef, likes using big words, has a liking for math and is considered the coolest nerd by his peers; please welcome Hector!"

Hector strode out from backstage and politely waved to the audience. There was a fair bit of clapping but a few boo's as well. Hector sat on the guest's chair and relaxed.

"Greetings Eddie and Sasha. So this is Total Ousted Alphabet is it?" Inquired Hector before his eyes landed on the other losers. "Hey guys."

The others besides Nakia responded with small waves as the hair obsessed Libby was still brushing her hair.

"Hector; good to have you on the show; how does it feel to be here?" Asked Sasha as she politely smiled in welcome.

"It feels quite, for a lack of a better word, exciting. Still; the fact I'm here means I'm no longer in the running for the prize … unless Chris returns a few people halfway through the season as he did last time." Said Hector as he scratched an itch on his left arm.

"Maybe he will; but even me and Eddie don't know." Shrugged Sasha. "So; what did you think of your experience on Wawanakwa Island?"

"It was quite an enjoyable experience." Said Hector as he smiled. "I made some friends and lasted a few days. And I actually got some good food. Gary is quite a talented chef."

"I can agree to that." Concurred Eddie. "I haven't tasted his food but it's great to look at."

"Well he certainly made my stay on the Island better than it would have otherwise been." Chuckled Hector. "I had a good time."

"You've now been voted off. How does it make you feel to know that you've been voted off seventh out of twenty six?"

"Probably like a fat loser with bad hair!" Laughed Nakia rudely; the other losers looked at her in disdain and disapproval.

"Better than being voted off forth." Replied Hector calmly. "And my downfall was caused by someone organizing my elimination rather than my own frivolous and self absorbed personality and unkind attitude."

Nakia was silent. After a moment she scowled as she continued brushing her hair.

"Nice one Hector." Chuckled Eddie. "So you think someone caused you to be voted off? I'm going to take a guess and say you think it was Tabitha, right?"

"Of course; she's a charismatic manipulator. That's probably how she got people on her side." Explained Hector with a frown. "But I can tell she'll get what's coming to her eventually."

"I don't like bad guys; they taste yucky." Said Patch with a gag. Everyone turned and stared at him in confusion for a moment.

"I don't think I want to know." Said Carlton as he looked at his shoes.

"Well; would you like to know who Tabitha convinced to vote for you?" Asked Sasha.

"Sure; who was it?" Shrugged Hector as he readied his ears.

"While Irene voted for you without being told to Tabitha herself voted for you along with Uzuri and … Vinnie." Explained Sasha apologetically.

Hector looked surprised for a moment; he then nodded and looked deep in thought.

"I wonder what lies Tabitha told him to make him vote for me?" Thought Hector aloud. "It couldn't have been anything good."

"Well Tabitha didn't tell Vinnie anything; she told Uzuri to ask Vinnie to vote for you; it was Tabitha's finest hour … or maybe her most underhanded." Explained Sasha with a sigh. "Why do nasty people always go far in these kinds of shows?"

"Maybe because the whole thing might be planned from start to end; I've heard of that sort of thing." Answerered Hector with a guess. "That's what I think anyway."

"Or it could be that they are so underhanded, tactless, mean and skilled at what they do that they can weasel their way out of any obstacle or vote off." Said Eddie as he crossed his arms. "Either way Tabitha isn't the one to watch for; it's Kasimar we should want to crash and burn. Though he did get a bit of punishment in the torture challenge."

"That was very amusing to watch." Said Hector with a laugh. "He must have had bad luck to pick the shoddy chair."

"True; so, would you like to hear some of your fan mail?" Asked Sasha as she took out a medium sized sack of letters.

"Why not? It'll be enlightening to know what the fans think of me." Nodded Hector as he looked at the mail bag. "Looks like I have some fans; though their will inevitably be some haters among them."

"Nobodies perfect." Said Sasha truthfully as she opened the first letter. "Dear Hector; why do you use such big words? They're annoying and make you seem like a wannabe smart guy. Face it; you're unlikable and nerds never go anywhere. They're just foot stools for the popular people. From Rachel B Statler. She didn't seem very nice." Said Sasha with a frown as she put the letter to the floor and stomped on it.

"I just use large words by force of habit; all my friends at school do; I just picked it up after a while." Explained Hector before frowning. "And why is it people don't like big words yet they like Barney's pirate accent? It's the same thing in a way."

"Next letter; oh, never mind, it's from weight watchers. We had one of those for Patch as well." Said Sasha as she looked at the letter in annoyance. "Overweight people aren't bad; they're just as good as us! Why do people discriminate?"

"There's no one reason; the reasons themselves are virtually infinite. Stoll; Chris did single me out a bit because of my weight; now I fully understand how Fifi feels about women discrimination. It's just … incorrect."

"It's good to know some people understand." Said Fifi with a smile.

"How about another letter." Asked Sasha as she took a third envelope out from the sack and opened it. "Let's see; this is from somebody called Millie. To Hector; why do you like math so much? I think it's boring and useless.

"That's a good question. You see; I've always liked numbers, except a certain number before seventy and after sixty eight that shall not be named to prevent embarrassment. They're used in everyday life all the time and most successful people have some form of math ability. I was always talented at the subject and at school me and my accomplices formed a math club that I'm vice president of. Math has just … helped me through my life so I've learned to like it." Explained Hector to the camera.

"I don't like Math; it's scary." Said Carlton as he hid his eyes behind his hands.

"To face your fears you've got to believe in yourself. I would have conquered mine if the temperature didn't drop so suddenly. I blame Wallace." Said hector as he relaxed a bit. "Anymore letters?"

"We've got time for one more." Nodded Sasha as she took out another letter from within the mail sack. "This one is from someone called Earnest."

"Is his second name Taxtod?" Asked Hector with a look of interest."

"…Wow; it is. Do you know this guy?"

"Earnest is my best friend back home; he's the head of the math club." Explained Hector. "Read on, I'd like to know what he has to say."

"Ok. Hey Hector my friend. How are you? I've been watching you on Television since the start of the season. You may have been voted off but to me you've done what no nerd has done before. You've got past a maze, made a theme song, been in an alliance, played human snooker, rode a sleigh down a mountain, nearly faced your fear and come face to face with a giant tentacle. You'll have to fill me in on what went on off camera when you get back. I can tell you'll have quite a few stories to tell me and others mathletes. Kudos Hector; may the force me with you."

Hector was silent and then smiled warmly.

"That was nice; it really accelerates and heats my heart to know that my best friend has taken the time to write to me and still cheers for me even though I lost. Yep; often it's the unpopular people who are truly the coolest." Said Hector wisely.

"It's been very intellectual to have you on our show Hector; but it looks like this interview has no time left. Take a seat by Yessica please because we've got to keep the flow going." Said Eddie as he shook Hector's hand.

"Of course; it was quite pulchritudinous to talk to you." Said Hector as he finished shaking Eddies hand and walked over to sit by Yessica.

"Err … pulchid a what?" Asked Sasha in confusion. What does that mean?"

"Your guess is as good as mine." Said Eddie in equal confusion.

"Well; maybe we should just forget about it and move onto our next guest." Suggested Sasha.

"Good idea Sash." Agreed Eddie quickly as he gestured to the left of the stage. "Our next guest has messy hair, likes money, stole stuff, gave it all back, has an extreme form of Obsessive Compulsion Disorder and helped get Patch out of the hot sauce; it's Zita!"

Zita strolled out from behind the curtains and waved to the audience. A few of them booed but a number of them cheered for the teenage thief. Zita sat down and took out a squeezy toy.

"Hello Zita." Greeted Eddie as he extended his hand for a shake. "We're glad to have you on the show."

Zita accepted Eddie's handshake and smiled.

"It's kind of good to be here err, Eddie was it?" Asked Zita before continuing. "I haven't really seen you besides once at dinner when you were shaking the vending machine."

"Yep; my names Eddie, Eddie Lynmoire to be precise. And you'll be pleased to know I did managed to shake a cola out of the stupid vending machine; it didn't accept my quarter."

"That's why I used to use a quarter on a string." Chuckled Zita. "Though I prefer Pepsi myself to be honest."

"Me too." Agreed Sasha.

"Traitor." Teased Eddie. "But seriously; the Coke versus Pepsi argument aside we've got to get cracking on this interview."

"True; it's time for me to answer your stupid questions." Chuckled Zita.

"They aren't stupid … but if you want a stupid question that's fine; why doesn't MacDonald's sell hotdogs?" Asked Sasha with a laugh.

"Ok; worst question ever." Said Zita with an amused sigh.

"Time to get serious. Zita; you were on Team Puzzle and lasted till day seven so you therefore got to know your team mates a bit. What did you think off them?"

"Does that include the evil one?" Asked Zita.

"Do you mean Nakia?" Asked Eddie despite already knowing the answer full well.

"Yep." Confirmed Zita.

"Hey! Like you're one to talk." Said Nakia haughtily. "Your hair is what's evil … though it _is_ marginally better than spider's hair."

"Well; to answer your question Nakia is not someone I'm overly fond of. She thinks she is great but she is not. Though I care nothing for popular level she brings a new term to the word stupid." Said Zita while glaring at Nakia. "I don't like bullying of any type."

"What about the other six?" Said Sasha interestedly. "You seemed to get along with them fairly well."

"Well how could I not really? They're all nice people. Even after I stole from then they forgave me. That's admirable. Jimmy really lives up to his label as a Polly Anna. He's always happy no matter what and manages to keep a smile on his face no matter the situation. Barney is kind of weird but I can tell he has hidden depths. He's been excelling at every challenge so far and nearly won the snooker challenge. And Spider is a nice guy; he just needs to be given a chance which thankfully most people give him … though I'll admit I'd rather keep out of his sneezing range."

"Well nobody really likes being sneezed on." Pointed out Yessica.

"True; it is a very easy way to spread diseases; that's why when you're sick you should always carry tissues around. Good thing Spider does." Added Hector.

"Does tissue taste good?" Asked Patch dumbly.

"No; it doesn't." said Fifi as she tried to keep her patience.

"So; when Nakia walked the dock of shame your remaining bunk mates were Eleanor and Quana. What did you think of them?" Asked Eddie as he continued the question and veered the topic away from the subject of tissue eating.

"Eleanor's a nice kid; I can see her going far. She has a sort of 'you like her or you like her more' thing going on. I don't think anyone hates her … for reasons other than hair before you say anything." Said Zita quickly as Nakia opened her mouth to speak but stayed quiet. "Her ferrets are pretty cute, I don't steal animals. I'm not that under handed. Overall she's a very nice person, lawful good even. Quana is also very nice; she's the type of person you'd like on your team in a sports game or maybe if you need a shoulder to cry on. She stands up for the unpopulars, her singing is great, she is basically just … nice, something a lot of people aren't. Whichever guy ends up with her is going to be very happy."

"So you got along with your room mates; that's good to know. But what about your opinion on Andy?" Questioned Sasha. "He got eliminated just a little over an hour ago and ended up with a dislocated shoulder. What are your thoughts?"

"I have no problems with the guy; he can seriously take pain; did you _see_ how well he did in the torture challenge. I don't blame him for saying uncle; he was up against Oscar on Uzuri. One is a muscle man… and the other actually likes pain." Said Zita in respect. "It was a shame he was voted off really."

"If I was competing I would have liked to have been on Team Puzzle." Said Eddie as he opened a hatch on the arm of the chair and took out a glass of water. "Too bad I wasn't accepted; but hosting this show isn't so bad."

"How would you describe your time on the Island?" Asked Sasha. "I may not have been there at any point but I'm sure it's not a nice place."

"You are correct; it's a dump; I don't know what Chris was thinking when he based his show on this Island … he was probably high." Shrugged Zita. "The challenges weren't really so bad; the torture challenge was insane indeed but the one I really didn't like was the fear challenge."

"I'm glad I wasn't there for that." Whimpered Carlton is relief. "I would have had to face lawn gnomes!"

"…Right." Said Zita while wondering how anyone could be frightened of lawn gnomes of all things. "I don't know about you guys; but the challenge Chris set up for me to complete was insane! Did he even stop once to think that the smoke inhalation and burns could kill me? And even if I had completed the challenge I would almost certainly have been in hospital and out of the game … so I didn't do it. Thankfully the others weren't upset in the slightest."

"I agree; that's just plain wrong. Chris has got a serious problem." Said Sasha. "I wonder what his fear is."

"Probably his hair looking bad." Said Eddie in an attempt to lighten the mood. "So; quick question to the campers voted off before the fear challenge. What are you scared off?"

"As I said … lawn gnomes." Said Carlton as he whimpered and cowered down.

"Mines easy; bad hair days." Said Nakia with a shiver. "That or my hair getting hurt in any way."

"Uuuurrrrgh … I'm scared of being hungry." Shrugged Patch as he ate another chocolate bar.

"My fear is zippy from rainbow." Shivered Fifi. "Laugh if you want but I always found him really creepy."

"That makes two of us." Agreed Eddie. "The one advantage you guys had when you were voted off is that you didn't have t face your fears."

"I wonder what Daisy is scared of?" Pondered Hector.

"I think I heard her mention something about fearing getting less than an A+ on a test." Said Yessica as she looked off stage after the trail of blue jelly.

"What about you Eddie? What scares you?" Asked Sasha.

"As it won't be used against me as I'm not competing; I'll admit that I'm scared of clowns … like a lot. I just don't like them." Admitted Eddie with a shrug. "What about you Sasha?"

"I'm scared of the Waterwraith." Said Sasha with a shiver.

"What's that?" Asked Zita curiously.

"It's an enemy in Pikmin 2; in one of the caves it chases after you if you spend too long on a sublevel … and you have no way of hurting it. I lost all of my Pikmin in my squad to it that day. And its theme music … brrrrr, creepy." Said Sasha with a gulp.

"This talk of fears has been interesting but this is an interview about Zita." Said Eddie. "Next question."

"Right; Zita, you mentioned that you felt terrible about stealing your friends stuff yet you normally felt no remorse. Why was that?" Asked Sasha with big interest.

"Well; the people who I've stolen from it the past were people who were pretty mean; I'd never stolen from a friend before. But when I saw Quana's tears and learned how much trouble Spider would be in if he didn't have his medication I just felt like someone had put a clamp on my gut." Said Zita with a sigh. "I kind of deserved to get voted off that night; at least I left with a clear conscience and everyone forgave me."

"What do you think would have happened to Spider if he didn't get his meds?" Asked Sasha. "He may have really been in pain."

"It couldn't have been anything good; it was kind of stupid to steal them. I'm not a drug dealer; I'm … flawed." Said Zita with a bit of guilt.

"Who cares right?" Asked Nakia as she brushed her hair. "So what if that bad haired abomination croaked? That'd be his karma."

Fifi yanked Nakia's hair hard which made Nakia wail in pain. After a moment of tugging Fifi let go and relaxed. Nakia had a look of shock on her face and was oddly silent.

"Moving on from that; one more question. Who do you want to win out of the remaining contestants?" Asked Sasha with a smile. "Who are you rooting for?"

"Everyone on my team; particularly Eleanor and Quana." Said Zita with a confident nod. "They deserve to go far."

"Hopefully further than Tabitha or Kasimar." Said Eddie as he took out a sack of letters. "You've got quite a bit of mail; some people seem to be big fans. Then again some people might be a bit … tactless in what they write."

"I can take it; I'm a tough girl." Smirked Zita as she crossed her arms and legs. "How bad could it be?"

"The first letter is from 'The Todd'." Said Eddie as he took the letter from the confines of the envelope. "Dear evil minion Zita. You are one of my favorite contestants; you steal and made the singer cry! Mwahahahaha! You have a bright and dark future in evil! But stealing possessions is only a low tier form of evil; why not steal the president's wallet? Mwahahahaha! … Ok; does this guy know Wallace by any chance?"

Eddie screwed the letter up and tossed it off the stage. Zita sighed and looked a little hurt.

"It's good to know I have a fan that likes me … but I'm not evil." Insisted Zita as she hung her head. "I just have problems; it's not like I enjoy seeing people sad; I'm not Chris or Kasimar."

"We know you're not like that." Said Eddie warmly and gently. "But some people interpret us the wrong ways. Maybe the next letter will be better."

Eddie opened another letter and sighed.

"How did this get in here? It's a letter with the word 'spam' written over and over. Waste of paper." Grumbled Eddie as he tore the letter to shreds and opened another. "This one might not be so bad. Zita; stealing may be against the Bible but I can see a good person within you. Apologies go a long way and since you meant it that proves you have a good heart. God bless you and enjoy your stay at Playa Des Losers. Fro, Hannah. Aw; now isn't that a nice letter?"

Zita was now smiling and ran a hand through her messy hair.

"I'm not too sure about any type of origin or faith … but that girl sounded so nice. She sounds like she would have done very well on this show. Well Hannah; if you are watching this then thanks for the nice letter."

"We have time for just one more letter; care to hear it?" Asked Eddie as he took out another envelope.

"Sure; I'm in no hurry." Shrugged Zita.

Eddie opened the letter and looked over its contents to make sure it wasn't anything bad. He seemed mildly satisfied and began to read it.

"Dear Zita; what is your favorite color? I'm guessing green because it's the color of money. From Dan." Eddie finished reading and shrugged. "Not particularly great but it seems nice enough. Your answer?"

"Green is actually my second favorite color; my favorite color is in fact silver. It's just shiny and can kill werewolves; I hope someone uses it on Jacob. I've had enough of that crappy Twilight series." Said Zita in a little disdain.

"I like Twilight." Said Nakia as she still brushed her hair. "Jacob is hot."

"I hate it; and anyone who wishes to be taken seriously by me must hate it as well." Grumbled Sasha.

"You'll take me seriously then." Chuckled Eddie. "I think its complete and utter garbage; the Warrior Cats series is better."

"This talk of Twilight is making me nauseas; can we move on?" Asked Sasha.

"Sure; well Zita, this concludes our interview with you. We've learned a lot and hopefully everyone out there will learn to look past your stealing and see what's on the inside." Smiled Eddie.

"Like Eddie says and more; beauty is in the eye of the beholder … not that those many eyed monsters are very pretty by anyone's standards." Chucked Sasha.

"Thanks guys." Said Zita as she arose and sat down on next to Hector on the large sofa and waved to the audience.

"It's time for our final guest of the night." Said Sasha to the audience. "He loves the cosmos, wants to be an astronaut, has a collection of toy rocket ships and is best friends with a pirate. Give a round of applause for Andy!"

Andy entered the stage and waved to the audience with his left hand. His right arm was still in a cast which now had a number of signatures on it. The audience applauded very loudly as Andy took a seat in the fluffy sea green armchair and relaxed.

"Finally; some relaxation … and after the day I've had I'm going to need it." Sighed Andy in contentment.

"Hi Andy; before we start the interview … are you ok? That injury looks like it really hurts." Said Sasha gingerly and sympathetically.

"It hurt like buggery at the time; but I have got a fairly high tolerance for pain." Shrugged Andy before sighing. "Though I would have liked to have gotten to the merge at least. Shame really; if this hadn't happened I may have had a good chance at staying. But what's done is done."

"Do you have any idea who set up the trap?" Asked Sasha. "We know already; but who do you suspect?"

"I'm sure it was the guy on Team Grenade with the sunglasses and the leather jacket; Wallace is his name I think. It is completely within his nature to cheat." Said Andy with a look of anger. "Cheaters never win … so I hope Wallace loses sometime soon."

"Well; Team Grenade has won a lot of challenges … but they can't evade elimination forever." Said Eddie before grinning almost sinisterly. "And when they do Kasimar and Wallace are gonna be in _real_ trouble. I hope their downfalls will be delightfully _brutal_. Ga'fahahaha!"

"You and Wallace may get along; you both have an evil laugh." Chuckled Andy.

"Trust me buddy; I'm not evil." Assured Eddie truthfully. "I just strongly dislike Wallace and Kasimar … particularly the latter."

"Don't we all." Said Sasha as she rested her right shoulder on the arm of her chair and her head on her right hand. "So Andy; during your eight day stay on Wawanakwa Island you became pretty good friends with Barney; are you rooting for him?"

"Of course." Nodded Andy. "He's funny, a bit mad, cool and believe it or not he's actually really intelligent … at least I think he is. And we were the first two people to finish the first challenge."

"What do you think of Barney's whole 'pirate' obsession?" Asked Sasha before chuckling. "It is a little unusual."

"A guy's got to have a hobby right?" Reasoned Andy with a cheerful laugh. "He may be unusual but he's anything but a weirdo. Barney has a positive outlook on life. He says that life is a party and everyone is invited and that not fitting in with the popular crowd is a very good omen. And let's not forget his collection of pirate comics; they're actually really good."

"Moving on from Barney; what's this about you _liking_ Mable?" Smirked Eddie with a sly grin.

Andy blushed in embarrassment as some members of the audience let out 'Awws'.

"Well; I just like her ok. It's not like it's the first man on the moon all over again." Sighed Andy in amusement. "She's just … my type of girl. Tough, unusual, eats healthy, friendly and full of fun."

"By unusual do you mean her hair?" Said Sasha.

"Well; how many people with blue and orange hair do you know?" Asked Andy with a 'duh' sort of voice. "What about you? What type of girls do you like hmmm?"

"That's neither here nor there." Said Eddie in noticeable embarrassment.

"You're right … it's here, there and everywhere!" Laughed Andy.

"Hey! Me and Sasha are asking the questions here." Said Eddie with a laugh as he tried to get the interview back on track. "Well how about this. What do you think of Barney's love lessons? Is he a good teacher?"

"Well as I was only his student for one day it's kind of hard to say. But from what Spider told me he is determined and persistent at his goals. He's not going to rest easy until Spider has hooked up with Quana."

"Spider is also taking love lessons from Barney; what do you think of him and Quana potentially hooking up?" Asked Sasha with a happy sigh. "Love makes the world go round."

"I think it would be, in one word, cute. A popular singer and a kind sick guy; I don't think that has happened before." Smirked Andy in humor. "The way Barney is teaching Spider he and Quana should be nice and hooked up by the merge."

"Eww! The idea that Spider deserves love is icky!" Whined Nakia. "If he and Quana fell in love and actually stayed dating after the show and for years after … the last thing this world needs is more people with bad hair."

"Got anymore of that blue Jelly?" Asked Zita hopefully as she glared at Nakia.

"I'm afraid not." Grumbled Sasha as she looked coldly at the popular bitch. "We only had the one bucket. Maybe we'll get more for the next aftermath."

"Maybe to avoid a potential fight it would be best to ask another question." Said Eddie quickly as he didn't really like fights too much.

"I think you might be right." Agreed Sasha as she adjusted her head band. "So Andy; what got you interested in space; where did it all begin?"

"That's an easy one." Said Andy as he began the explanation. "I had a planet mobile when I was a baby and a few toy rockets. I loved playing with them all the time. And then there was the moon in the sky. It seemed so close yet just out of reach. As I grew older I wondered more and more what's out there beyond our home world. The biggest factors in my obsession are the mobile I just told you about and the original series Star Trek DVD's my Uncle Hiroko gave me for my sixth birthday. I loved them and watched them over and over. And that is why I like outer space as I do."

"What's a mobile?" Asked patch while looking as though he had a very painful headache.

"It doesn't matter." Sighed Sasha. "Well Andy; you are officially the first person in Total Drama Letterz to leave with an injury. Do you think anyone else will have that fate befall them?"

"I seriously hope not. Nobody should be hurt so badly by another person that they are left with broken bones. That's unethical and heinous! I wouldn't put it past Kasimar to hurt someone … but even that monster must have some form of mercy in him." Said Andy in worry. "I hope Mable doesn't get hurt like me."

"Thankfully the Playa has got very good medical attention so any injuries can be treated." Said Eddie positively. "How are you going to get your arm fixed though? How long will it take to heal?"

"I wouldn't worry; the interns have got me an appointment with one of the medical staff so it can be popped back into place." Shrugged Andy without much bother. "Though it'll take a few days for all the pain and such to go. I should be perfectly fine for the next episode of total Ousted Alphabet."

"That's good to know; but how do you feel about being voted off, basically do you feel it was really fair?" Asked Eddie.

"Well I had a pretty big feeling I was going to go; I did however hope that fate would smile upon me … but it didn't this time." Said Andy with a hint of sadness. "I guess being voted out five to one can put a damper on your spirits."

"Actually it was four to two." Smiled Sasha. "One of your team mates didn't vote for you … and we've got the video to show you."

Sasha signaled someone off stage and a large television screen was lowered down from above. It turned on and a video began to play.

* * *

_Barney was in the confessional and looked a little sad._

"_It's not fair really; Andy was doing so well in this contest; from winning immunity in the maze to surviving the third longest in the torture challenge. Yaaaaar. But now he's got a peg leggedly bad dislocated shoulder. This kind of makes him not only less useful to the team but he might get even more hurt in the challenges to come as it may not heal." Barney sighs for a moment before smiling and looking determined. "But despite all this I shall not vote off me heartie. I'm going to vote for Eleanor … she's just the person I'm least close to on the team. Maybe Andy will stay after all. Yaaaaaaaaar ye scurvy viewers!_

* * *

Andy smiled as the video ended and looked touched.

"That confirms what I said earlier; Barney is a true friend. He didn't vote for me even when I was much less useful than anyone else." Said Andy happily. "I hope he goes all the way."

"Before we end the show would you like some fan mail?" Asked Sasha as she lifted a sack of mail from behind her chair.

"Would I ever." Said Andy eagerly. "Everyone loves getting mail."

Sasha opened an envelope from the top of the sack and began to read it's contents.

"Andy; what is your favorite planet? Is it Uranus? LOLLOLOLOLOL! From Mr. Hammerhead. Lame pun." Said Sasha as she tossed the letter. "Though that is a god point; what planet is your favorite?"

"Saturn." Answered Andy at once. "I just like it's rings; if only it were a vacation spot. Did you know it is also the lightest planet? They say if you found a bowl of water big enough to put it in then it would float."

"I like our own planet the most." Said Yessica with a smile. "It's got so much water and thus lots of places for swimming."

"Good answer; Saturn is my favorite planet too." Said Sasha as she opened the next letter. "Andy; I like space as well. The best part is that no matter how much we explore of it there will always be an infinity more for us to explore and discover. If you were an astronaut what is the first thing you would do?"

"If I were an astronaut, which I one day hope to be, I would compare my shoe size with the footprints Neil Armstrong left on the moon. After that I'd probably blow up some asteroids." Said Andy with a look of bliss on his face. "But that's something for another day. I hope this answers your question."

"Time for the final letter of the night. I hope it's a good one." Said Sasha hopefully as she reached down into the depths of the mail bag and came out with another letter. "It says; Dear Andy; do you have the game Spore because that is full of aliens and space travel. If you don't you should definitely give it a try. From Frannie.

"I do own Spore; it's one of my favorite past times. I've got just about all the badges and achievements; that includes fully annihilating the Grox. I'm just that good at space games." Said Andy proudly.

"I don't know what the Grox are but they sound nasty." Shivered Sasha before looking at her watch. "And with that last letter it looks like it's time for us to end the show."

"We hope you've enjoyed tonight's episode." Said Eddie as he sat up in his chair. "We now add Yessica, Hector, Zita and Andy to the list of people we've interviewed. Who will join us next time?"

"Hopefully Spider." Said Nakia as she _still_ brushed her hair. "Nobody likes him."

"SHUT UP!" Yelled Eddie, Sasha, Andy and all the other losers except Patch because he was picking his nose.

"So thus ends the second episode of total Ousted Alphabet. From me Eddie Lynmoire Goodnight."

"And fro me Sasha Tasset; goodbye!"

"And see you next time!" Both said in usion.

"And cut; we're off the air." Said the camera man as the audience quickly cleared out.

"So where am I sleeping?" Asked Andy. "All I want now is a good sleep."

"I'll show you to your room." Offered Zita. "What are Team Mates for?"

As the losers and the host and hostess began to leave Nakia stayed seated and slowly brushed her hair. Her eyes narrowed and she growled.

"_They'll all pay; all of them. Especially spider; him and his bad hair both._" Though Nakia as she finally finished brushing her hair.

* * *

The second aftermath has ended and we've learned a bit more about the previous four losers. I think this chapter turned out very well; I always seem to get the aftermaths done quicker than normal chapters.

What could Nakia be planning? It can't be good…


	19. Day 9, Part 1, Plucked From The Ground

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the 'Season that Must Never Be Named'. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. And let's not forget that I also do not own the alphabet theme; that was first created by Frank15 so thank you to him.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains bullying, some ship tease, a smoke bomb and lots of shameless product placement. Nothing M rated as always.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable VinniexUzuri Gary Raven and a secret pairing.

**Note: **Quick update right? It was the weekend and I had some time on my hands. Day nine's challenge is based on one of my favorite video games of all time. I hope you all enjoy it.

**Review Answers**

**Frank15: **Sent you a note.

**Bad-Asp:** Glad you liked the aftermath; but as for Nakia returning I cannot say. We'll find out who's returning later on but feel free to speculate.

Up to eleven!

* * *

The sun had arisen in the sky for the ninth day of Total Drama Letterz. Chris was standing on the dock of shame to give his daily recap but something seemed different; for one thing he was wearing a hat with the Nintendo logo on it. Chris smiled and threw up his arms as a shark jumped out of the water and ate a passing bird.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. I bought back an old favorite challenge from season one; the talent show. Unfortunately a few of these inferior losers that call themselves contestants criticized me for reusing a challenge and called me unoriginal. Like they could do any better! Anyway; the day started off well for the teams; some of the campers had actually got talent. Of course; none of them could top my talent of being awesome. Haha!"

Chris took out a mirror and gazed at himself in it and winked to his reflection.

"What can I say; I'm the most perfect and wonderful person there is. The campers had a variety of talents lesser than mine such as creative writing, the saxophone, stand up comedy, break dancing, Juggling, Singing and even making fireworks. And that's not even half of the talents. But as we know this show is known for underhanded cheating … and that's where Wallace comes in."

Chris laughed and took out a picture that had Wallace's mug shot on it. He nodded to himself and gave the thumbs up.

"This guy is more dastardly than Dick Dastardly himself! He has it all; theme music, evil laugh, leather jacket and a henchman. He set up some slippery liquid and a bowling ball trap on the stage in hopes that it would take out some of the competition. Wallace was correct in his thinking because it certainly took someone out in a big way! Haha!"

Chris laughed sadistically and smiled happily.

"Some of the talents were amazing; Lavender's cheer about me really warmed my heart. It's nice to see that even soulless people recognize my greatness. Likewise Irene's saxophone was great; it just had the rhythm of a guy called Chris. Haha! I happily gave those two a perfect ten."

Chris then frowned and stomped his foot angrily.

"But one act really ticked me off; Quana sung a song that even I admit was great … but she didn't put me in it! How jerkass can you get? I'm telling you; kids these days are out of control. But at least what happened next made everything better … way better."

Chris smirked and imitated screaming and then laughed.

"Andy fell victim to Wallace's trap during his talent of impersonating Darth Vader; he was left with a dislocated right arm and the title of first series injury of the season! I just love it when people get hurt. Haha! In the end though Team Puzzle lost and had to vote someone off. Unsurprisingly it was Andy who walked the dock of shame but as a sign of friendship Barney not only sighed his 'first mate's' cast but also didn't vote for him. Friendship is for sissies. But then again they are inferior to me."

Chris sighed before smiling and looking dead on at the camera.

"Who will be the tenth person to walk the shame? Will Barney find out who set up the trap? Will Tabitha get back to her manipulating role? And what cheating will Wallace come up with this time? Don't go anywhere because you'll find out all these right now on Total Drama Letterz!

"…Oh; and did I mention how awesome Nintendo is? Best … company … Ever!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

Barney sat on the dock of shame looking out at the sea; being a pirate he enjoyed being near the sea and the surrounding area … but last night his best friend has walked the dock Barney was now sat on and had left into the horizon of the sea.

"So this is how a captain feels when his cabin boy is eaten by the kraken." Sighed Barney. "Well; our team is down to five crew members now. We've already lose Nakia, good riddance, but also Zita and no Andy. It'll be hard but I've got to keep going and I've got to work harder now."

As Barney continued to look out to the sea Spider walked up to him and sat down next to his 'teacher'.

"Hey Barney; still down in the *cough* dumps about Andy leaving?" Asked Spider though he already knew that was what was wrong.

"Yeah me heartie; it's hard when a friend leaves you. It wasn't so bad when Nakia left because nobody liked her, I felt a little bad about voting for Zita … but with Andy gone the only guys are me, you and Jimmy. Girls are fine as well but I like to have a manly conversation. And Andy was the first friend I made here."

"Yeah; it's weird without Andy here *cough* but we have to move on." Said Spider. "You know *cough* what the worst part is?"

"What's that me heartie?" Asked Barney glumly.

"Andy was voted off before *sneeze* he hooked up with Mable." Sighed Spider. "It just goes to show *cough* that any of us could go *cough* at any time."

"You're right … and what kind of a pirate love doctor would I be if I didn't hook you up before either you or Quana leaves the Island and away with the tide?" Grinned Barney happily as he stood up. "Come on me heartie; we've got some work to do!"

Barney ran off back towards camp and Spider ran after him trailing slightly.

"Oh I hope I *cough* don't get a stitch!" Groaned Spider as he sped after his wild friend.

* * *

**Confessional: An eye for an eye; a heart for a heart … or something like that.**

**Barney: Spider is right as a wave; I have to keep my head held high and move on. Besides; Andy's going to be at the Playa where his injury will be fixed; Yaaaar, that be fortunate. Until then I'll continue through this contest and help Spider get the girl. Who knows; maybe I could find some, though I doubt it. But still…**

**Spider: Yesterday I couldn't help but ***cough* **notice how Barney smiled when Lavender fell ***cough* **on him. I wonder if Barney has ever ***sneeze* **thought about his own love ***cough*** life.**

* * *

Lavender was hanging out around the cabins with Mable and Raven. Rather than talking about how much they disliked Kasimar they were talking about the team in general and how they had gone quite a while without losing a challenge.

"It's the ninth day and our team has only lost once; I'm feeling pretty good about this whole thing." Said Lavender as she sat next to her friends with a smile. "Team Jungle and Team Puzzle have both lost three of their eight members and we've only lost Carlton. Maybe all seven of us will make the merge."

"And you say that like it's a good thing." Said Mable with a raised eyebrow. "You actually want Kasimar and Wallace in the merge; think of all the damage they could cause!"

"Well; that's true but while I hate to admit it the more people we have on our team the easier it is to win." Explained Lavender while moving part of her red hair from her face.

"I have a bone to pick with both those two; Wallace left me stuck in a hole and Kasimar spoiled the ending of my book!" Said Raven while looking _slightly_ miffed.

"But it was mondo how you kicked him in the crotch." Giggled Mable. "And I notice you aren't stuttering anymore."

"Yeah; I guess standing up to such a big bully made my shyness … slip away." Smiled Raven happily. "Maybe they'll have to change my stereotype as I've officially somewhat partially opened up."

"I'd say you've completely opened up; on the first day you stuttering so much and could barely look anyone in the eye … but now you aren't studying and you kicked Kasimar in the crown jewels!" Said Lavender with a proud expression to her team mate. "Sorry about your book getting spoiled but at least you still have the final one to read right?"

"That's true; I hope Harry defeats Voldemort." Voiced raven hopefully.

"Book spoiling and bullies aside good job yesterday girls; Mable, your pogo stick act was really good and Raven, if you'd gone on stage I'm sure you'd have gotten a nine at least." Congratulated Lavender. "Though I could have done without being hit by a bomb."

Raven and Mable exchanged glances and giggled; Lavender looked confused and raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"What are you two smiling about?"

"Oh nothing; I was just thinking back to when you fell into Barney's arms." Smirked Mable.

"He really is your night in skull and cross bones armour." Teased Raven.

Lavender's eyes widened and she blushed as red as her shirt and hair.

* * *

**Confessional: Someone's in loooooove! Teehee!**

**Lavender: Why does everyone insist I like Barney? Why? We have nothing in common! I'm a cheerleader with A's in pretty much every single class while he's a genki pirate guy. And don't start saying that opposites attract! He probably has no interest in love anyway.**

**Raven: Someone's in denial! Kehehehe!**

* * *

"I don't like him like that; is it like how you like Andy huh Mable?" Retorted Lavender craftily.

"Touché Lavender." Nodded Mable. "But everyone here has known everyone for like nine days; a bit early to pursue a relationship don't you think?"

Raven mumbled that sounded like 'but then again' and both Mable and Lavender heard this.

"What's that Raven; do you like someone?" Asked Lavender with a smirky smile.

Raven was saved from having to answer because just then Barney strolled up with Spider walking behind him.

* * *

**Confessional: Saved by the bell, err, pirate!**

**Raven: That was close. I guess I **_**sort of**_** like someone here, but I'm not saying who. But it's hard not to like him. He's nice and you've gotta like a guy who can cook. (**Raven smiles before widening her eyes). **Oops.**

* * *

"Ahoy girls!" Waved Barney as he walked up and tipped his hat. "How are you doing me red, black and blue haired sea lassies?"

"I'm doing fine." Shrugged Raven with a small smile. "We were just talking about our team being the strongest overall."

"Say what you will shy one; but it is Team Puzzle that will make everyone else walk the plank!" Smirked Barney. "Or walk the dock in this case."

"Would you like us to give you one of our team members?" Asked Lavender hopefully. "We'd gladly give you Kasimar."

"I don't want *cough* him." Said Spider uneasily. "He's a complete monster! So far *cough* he's physically hurt Jimmy, slapped *cough* Quana on the ass and has tried to pulverize me! I'd rather keep *sneeze* my arms attached thank you very much."

"I agree with my protégé; we don't want that scurvy demon; you can keep him." Nodded Barney very rapidly so his hair flew about.

"Say; where's Andy? Doesn't he always hang out with you two?" Asked Mable. "Is his arm ok?"

"Well blue haired one; it pains me to say that Andy's stay in Davy Jones Locker has ended. He has rode the boat of losers to a place where he will hopefully recover from the pain of this Island." Said Barney as he took off his hat in respect to his voted off friend.

"So; he's voted off?" Said Mable with a little sadness. "That's a real shame; and I think I know who did it as well."

"Who? I'll stick them on a hook and feed them to the sharks! Yohohohohoho!" Laughed Barney while the others looked a little weirded out.

"Err; yeah." Said Mable with a slow shake of her head. "I suspect it was Wallace; so far I'm certain has cheated at every challenge since we started this contest."

"Oh; I curse Swedish fish on him!" Said Barney crossly as he turned to Spider. "Come my protégé; we have to avenge that which we have lost!"

"Wait; when did you take Spider on as you so called 'protégé'?" Asked Lavender curiously. "Are you teaching him to become a pirate?"

"Nope; I'm just hooking him up. See you later mermaids!" Said Barney with a wave as he sped off.

"Err … see you *cough* later." Said Spider with a great deal of embarrassment as he left after Barney.

The three girls were silent for a moment before Mable chuckled.

"You can't deny that Barney would be an interesting boyfriend right Lavender?" Teased Mable.

Lavender just sighed in exasperation.

* * *

**Confessional: Exasperatingly energetic.**

**Mable: Call me a shipper if you want; I just think that Lavender and Barney would go good together. They'd be like mash potato's and gravy, very good together indeed.**

**Lavender: Ok; maybe I like barney a **_**tiny**_** bit but just as a friend; to be honest he looks like some hero out of a video game. And we're on different teams; what kind of a leader would I be if I started dating the enemy?**

* * *

Uzuri was sitting on a chair next to a table in the mess hall drawing a picture; she may not have looked it but she was quite talented at art. She had her head down and her pencil on the paper. The concentration she had was immense.

"I wonder if I should draw a bear trap on his head. Hmmmm; that would really be a head ache. Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as she continued to draw.

Tabitha entered the mess hall and spotted Uzuri sitting and drawing. Tabitha had never been that good at art but right now that didn't matter; she needed to talk to Uzuri about their alliance. She sat down next to Uzuri and cleared her throat.

"Good morning Uzuri." Greeted Tabitha.

Uzuri didn't respond; she was so engrossed in her picture that she hadn't heard Tabitha speak.

"Uzuri; are you listening?" Asked Tabitha as she tapped Uzuri on the shoulder.

This got the Sweet Sadist's attention; Uzuri stopped drawing and looked at Tabitha.

"Good morning Tabitha; sleep well? Hopefully the monsters of the dream world didn't want to give you a forceful rope burn. Teehee!" Said Uzuri with her usual cheerful smile.

"No; I had a refreshing slumber and … what is that you're drawing?" Asked Tabitha in slight uneasiness as she looked at Uzuri's drawing.

"Oh this? This is just a picture of Chris being paid a visit by Jigsaw. As you can see jigsaw wanted me play a game; but I don't think Chris likes it too much. Do you like it; I think I did a pretty good job."

This was certainly a matter of opinion and taste though Tabitha as she looked down at her pawn's picture; it showed Chris in a bare room embedded on a barbed hook with venus fly traps munching at his feet and his hair on fire. His facial expression looked very horrific. Tabitha shuddered and looked back at Uzuri who was awaiting her opinion.

"Well; it would get an award for originality in a contest." Said Tabitha as she tried not to look at the scary picture. "I know none of us like Chris at all but don't you think that's a bit on the extreme side?"

"Jigsaw has no limits!" Giggled Uzuri as she pocketed her pencil. "And Chris could free himself if he gets the hacksaw from in his back pocket and uses it on the chains."

* * *

**Confessional: I have no limit; no limit to how often you use me that is!**

**Tabitha: **(She looks wide eyed and quite shocked). **How anyone could call that … that torture a piece of art is beyond my knowledge! There is no denying that Uzuri is a talented artist; but the stuff she draws makes me fear what goes on in her mind. An alliance with Kasimar is beginning to look more and more appealing … but then again Uzuri is loyal and Kasimar hates practically everyone.**

* * *

Tabitha struggled a very forced smile that looked painful and pretended top look interested.

"I see; I take it you don't like Chris then." Said Tabitha as she looked away from the creepy picture.

"Not very much; he called me a freak; I really don't like being called a freak. At least you wouldn't call me a freak." Said Uzuri with a kind smile.

"I wouldn't say such lies to you." Nodded Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: Or would she?**

**Tabitha: I wouldn't lie because it's the truth; the world would be better of without people like Uzuri, they endanger sane people like me unless we have their obedience.**

**Uzuri: Tabitha is such a good friend; I could use more friends in my life. **(Uzuri sighs).

* * *

"But Vinnie stood up for me." Said Uzuri before she giggled girlishly. "If you ask me I'd say he's kind of cute, handsome even. And his hat is really fashionable."

"Focus Uzuri." Said Tabitha with an increasingly painful forced smile because she felt like throttling Uzuri. "You can go about your personal life later; we need to talk about our alliance."

"Sure! What part do you want to talk about?" Asked Uzuri.

"Who do we vote off next time we lose? It's kind of a dead end we've run into." Explained Tabitha with a hand motion. "Neither I or you can go as we're allied; Gary cooks us good food and is kind of useful so he can't go, Vinnie has great strength in his arm … and you might like him so he can't go. And Irene is kind, friendly and knows a lot about the great outdoors. So really we can't vote her off either. As I said; a dead end."

Tabitha and Uzuri's conversation was interrupted when Vinnie entered the mess hall for breakfast.

"Not a word about our alliance." Whispered Tabitha. Uzuri nodded in understanding and even saluted.

"Hey girls." Greeted Vinnie as he sat down next to them. "Is Gary here yet; I'm kind of hungry and I don't think Chef would let me in his kitchen."

"I don't think he's here yet." Said Tabitha as she stood up. "I think I'll soak up some rays before breakfast. I'll keep an eye out for Gary; If I see him I'll let him know to come here. I'll see you two later."

Tabitha discreetly winked to Uzuri and left the mess hall with left the two short campers alone.

* * *

**Confessional: Alone in the light, in the light not the dark.**

**Tabitha: Think of it this way. I can easily use Uzuri's crush on Vinnie to my advantage. If they start becoming good friends then they'll work well together, that's good for our team. And Vinnie owes me a favor so he could easily become my second pawn. If they hook up and it ever came down to us three on the team it's certain Uzuri wouldn't vote for me as I've been such a good friend. And I could win any tie breaker. Besides; I could easily break up the possible relationship … you know; for laughs.**

**Vinnie: So; alone in a mess hall with Uzuri with nobody to interfere. It was time to make a move … though nothing too obvious of course.**

* * *

Vinnie moved seats so he was sitting next to Uzuri and glanced at her picture. Rather than being disturbed like Tabitha he thought it was a good situation to put Chris in after all he had done.

"Nice drawing Uzuri; you're really good at art." Complimented Vinnie. "Have you ever thought about submitting this to deviantart?"

"I actually have an account already." Said Uzuri while smiling at Vinnie's compliment. "My username is 'SweetSadist888'. Maybe when you next have internet access you could look at my art."

"I certainly do that; I appreciate art." Said Vinnie truthfully. "So; I take it you don't like Chris very much to have drawn him in this position."

Uzuri frowned and pouted a little.

"Chris is so mean! He's level grinded so much in his nastiness since season one." Said Uzuri crossly before sighing. "And he called me a freak. I really don't like being called that, a few people back home label me as one."

"They sound like jerks; to me it doesn't matter what's on the outside, it's what's on the inside that matters. Trust me Uzuri; you're no freak. If anyone here is a freak … it's Kasimar."

"Yeah; I don't like bullies, he scares me a little." Shivered Uzuri. "Though most people are too scared of me to attempt to even hit me."

"I've been beaten up before." Shrugged Vinnie before pointing to his metal arm. "But ever since I've had pinchy and left the school bully with … well … an accidental injury I've never had any problems."

"So what's it like having a metal arm? It must be cool! You could give anyone who hurts you or your friends a run through like the cocoanuts yesterday! Teehee!" Said Uzuri excitedly.

With that question began a lengthy conversation and the time started to just fly by. It was good for the two unusual campers to bond a little. And Vinnie had to admit that even though Uzuri was somewhat creepy she was a very original and interesting person.

* * *

**Confessional: Mind link mates?**

**Vinnie: **(He is smiling). **Maybe she likes me.**

**Uzuri: **(She is giggling). **Maybe he likes me.**

**Chris: That's disgusting! Freaks don't deserve love! Why can't the world be free of inferior scum and only filled with perfection like me?**

* * *

Oscar was relaxing on the beach; he had been lifting weights since his breakfast and was now taking a break from his usual work out.

"At least now I can have some rest." Said Oscar to himself. "It's kind of hard to get a decent sleep with Kasimar and Wallace as your room mates."

Oscar closed his eyes and was content to just snooze before the next challenge. As she dozed he thought about the competition so far. He felt he had done pretty well; he did decently in the maze, passed the theme song challenge, nearly won human snooker, found some boxes in the Christmas challenge, faced his fear, nearly won the torture challenge and had lifted upwards of three hundred pounds.

Oscar felt content but then his mind drifted to Kasimar. Oscar mentally scowled. Kasimar was the bane of his existence. How could anyone be so nasty? It was as if he had just come into existence to cause trouble, havoc and chaos. Oscar knew he would get his eventually as Oscar was a firm believer in karma.

Then Oscar thought about Xaria. When he first met her she had been pretty negative and complained a fair bit … but now she wasn't so bad. Sure; a little rough around the edges yes, but a nice person all the same. Oscar couldn't help but think there was a reason behind her attitude but wondered if it was such a good idea to ask.

"Something on your mind Oscar?" Asked Eleanor as she sat down next to the body builder.

"Oh hi Eleanor. I'm just thinking about the contest so far; good job on getting to the ninth day." Said Oscar as he opened his eyes and sat up.

"Thanks; though you haven't had to do much as your team keeps winning." Said Eleanor with a smile. "It's like that season of survivor where one team won every single challenge before the merge. You and your team have only lost once while my team and Team Jungle have lost three times."

"Well; it's just hard work, perseverance and a little luck." Shrugged Oscar. "Besides; some victories weren't completely honest; Wallace keeps cheating in every challenge. I'd like him to go though I'd prefer him over He Who Must Not Be Named."

"You mean Kasimar?" Asked Eleanor. "He scares me a little."

"Don't worry; I think he talks the talk more than he walks the walk." Reassured Oscar warmly. "Though I'd rather not talk about him. So; I hear one of your ferrets is going to have babies; how much longer till the young ones are born?"

"About two weeks give or take a few days. It's going to be incredible!" Said Eleanor as she shook in excitement before calming down. "So; you looked like you had something important on your mind. Was it anything other than the contest?"

"It's nothing too big; I was just pondering on why Xaria is kind of negative. I understand some people can be a little bitter but … call me clairvoyant but it just seems like she has a reason for it." Said Oscar with a coy look.

"Why don't you just ask her? Gently of course." Suggested Eleanor helpfully.

"I don't know if that will work." Said Oscar. "You don't just go and ask someone personal things. Still; maybe I'll ask her during the challenge today but only if she looks in a good mood."

"Do you like her?" Giggled Eleanor.

"Sure; she's my friend."

"I meant _like_ her." Smirked Eleanor with a giggle.

"No, no, no! I didn't come to this island for a relationship. I'm simply here to win … and possibly assure Kasimar loses." Said Oscar in embarrassment. "Anyway; I'm going to soak up some rays before the challenge; you can join me if you want. A healthy amount of sun is good for you."

"Thanks but that's ok." Said Eleanor as she stood up. "I've got to go and feed Frost and Dandelion. Ever since she became pregnant Dandelion has eaten a lot more and I have to make sure she gets enough."

"Ok; see you later than Eleanor." Said Oscar as he went back to dozing.

* * *

**Confessional: Now with 50% more fiber! LOL!**

**Oscar: I'm not really a romantic; there's a girl who goes to my school called Crystal. She's really nice and REALLY likes hooking everyone up. She even offered to get me hooked up but I said no, I just don't feel like I'm ready. **(Oscar thinks for a moment). **And while we're on the subject of love it seems nobody has hooked up yet. But in these shows it's only a matter of time right? **(Oscar chuckles).

**Eleanor: Ninth say huh? I'm feeling pretty good for getting this far … but I'll feel even better if I can make it to the merge. (Eleanor smiles to herself and suddenly looks confused). Wait; what's this doing here? **(Eleanor reaches below camera and comes back up with a red Pikmin beanie toy). **I wonder who this belongs to.**

**Chris: Pikmin is one of many wonderful games from the wonderful and amazing company that is Nintendo. Like the Mario Bros they are super!**

* * *

Wallace was scheming, evilly scheming that is. He was a short distance into the woods; he had told Kasimar to meet him there to discuss future plans. They so far had been an unstoppable duo. With Kasimar's lack of morals and Wallace's great intelligence they would make the merge for sure.

"Let's see." Said Wallace as he looked through his notebook of evil ideas. "What evil should I do today? I could give Gary a wedgie, turn Eleanor's ferret cage upside down, put a super stink bomb in the cabin of the Team Puzzle guts … or maybe I should go back to my hole trap and cover it over again. Tough decisions."

Wallace looked over his 'evil' (and I use that term loosely) plans and thought a bit.

"This is a problem for every evil genius; deciding just how to wreck havoc. Maybe if any robots appear at any point in the competition I could use my Hacker Tether again. Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace in his usual evil way.

"What are you so happy about?" Grunted Kasimar as he walked into the clearing. "Did anyone die?"

"Nope; no one died." Replied Wallace.

"Darn shame; I know a few people I wouldn't mind leaving the world of the living." Said Kasimar bitterly. "So you wanted to see me about something"

"That I did my right hand man. Today we are going to screw over Team Jungle." Cackled Wallace menacingly. "Though it will come down to the type of challenge we are presented I feel it's about time we annihilated them! Mwuhahahahaha!"

"So why Team Jungle? Both of the other teams have five members and Team Puzzle seems to be the weaker team." Said Kasimar as he kicked a turtle that was slowly walking past. "Heh; I always get a kick out of that one. Yahaha!

"That is precisely the point; if we eliminate people on the stronger team then we'll have much less difficulty once the merge arrives. It's just common sense." Explained Wallace with an evil grin. "Besides; if we make Team Puzzle lose then Quana might get voted off; and since you like her and all I don't think that would be the best course of action."

"Fair enough; maybe you do have a brain in there."£ chuckled Kasimar.

"Well I do have an IQ of one hundred and ninety five. How else would I make all these wonderful gadgets I use? It's fortunate I'm naturally adept at mechanics and electronics." Said Wallace proudly.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't have an IQ as I don't have a brain!**

**Wallace: I do pride myself on my intelligence; it's one of my best aspects besides how evil I am! Though I could be a little better at cooking; but that matters not for evil villains never cook. Mwahahahahaha!**

**Kasimar: Wallace is intelligent enough; I'll give him that. I hate to admit it but he could be smarter than me … but he had better not forget that I'm stronger. Still; him gunning for Team Jungle so Quana stays is pretty decent. That way by the end of this contest I'll get some p(**Static cuts him off).

* * *

"Could you possibly make a tank?" Asked Kasimar with full interest. "I'd like to blow up the school and the orphanage."

"If you gave me a week or two I probably could." Shrugged Wallace. "I'm thinking more in the short term; who should we get out next?"

"Lavender of course." Said Kasimar with disdain.

"Well that might be a small problem." Said Wallace regretfully. "You see; everyone else likes her. If we lose again one of us might go … it is therefore in our best interests to keep cheating and winning challenges so that we don't go to a bonfire ceremony."

"Chris likes us as we create drama." Smirked Kasimar. "I'm sure he could twist the rules in our favor a little."

"Barney, are you sure this *cough* is a good idea?" Asked a slightly fearful voice from nearby.

"Trust me on this my protégé; I'm not letting that peg leg prat get away with what he did." Said a medium pitched happy and determined voice.

Wallace and Kasimar turned and saw Barney and Spider walking into the clearing; Barney looked fearless while Spider looked a little afraid. Spider stayed a distance from Kasimar as Barney walked up to Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional: Oooo; I don't like confrontations!**

**Spider: I tried to talk** *cough* **Barney out of it** *cough* **but he wants to get even with Wallace. I** *sneeze* **hope nobody gets hurt … nobody I care** *cough* **about that is.**

* * *

Barney stopped before Wallace and looked the bad guy right in the sunglasses covered eyes.

"So; you set up a trap and got me first mate voted off did you ya scurvy dog?" Asked Barney angrily.

"Of course I did! He left with a dislocated shoulder so I heard." Nodded Wallace with a cackle. "Aren't I so evil? Mwahahahaha!"

"Cut the crad evil one. This is a historic moment; it is where I make you back off from my crew ya hear?" Snapped Barney. "Andy was my first mate; my best friend and you made him get a dislocated shoulder! And I warn you now; I do know how to throw a punch! Yaaaaar!"

"Oh please; you can't beat me! You're good and I'm evil so I therefore will win! Mwahahahahaha!"

"I'm just warning you this time; leave me hearties alone! I don't care if you're Dick Dastardly or Dudley Do Right; I'll have your booty ya hear?" Said Barney as he glared at both Wallace and Kasimar; the latter of who was watching with amusement and glancing at Spider evilly every now and then.

"Oh shut up Blackbeard!" Snapped Wallace.

"Then leave my friends alone shark bait!" Retorted Barney.

"Bad haired blond!"

"Blue arrowed asswipe!"

"Stinky hat!"

"Moronic shades!"

"Genki Gutripper!"

"Non-Evil Kineevil!"

Spider and Kasimar glanced at each other; Wallace and Barney were pretty evenly matched in the insult department but neither was really making any progress. This name calling continued for about a minute before Wallace pulled out his "trumph card".

"Oh yeah? You … Garden Gnome!"

Barney was silent for a few seconds before he started to laugh and bend over in peels of laughter.

"Is that the best insult you can come up with? You call yourself a bad guy? You're just a wannabe bad guy!" Laughed Barney.

"We will meet again pirate." Said Wallace sinisterly. "And when we do I will have better insults. Chow!"

Wallace took out a bomb and threw it to the floor. Instantly a cloud of smoke rose up and when it cleared Wallace had vanished.

"I think I made my point." Said Barney in satisfaction. "If he leaves me and my friends alone I'll leave him alone savvy?"

"Yahaha! Gosh; you really think you can defeat a bad guy with just words? We'll skin you alive. Like I said to Bug; welcome to your worst nightmare; or at least it will be if you piss me off." Said Kasimar smugly.

Barney turned around and advanced on Kasimar with an expression of pure rage on his face and bared his fist. To Spider's surprise Kasimar started whimpering as he was backed into a tree.

"Listen to me and listen to me well because I'm only saying it once." Said Barney loudly and slowly. "You'd better stay away from Spider; I don't like my friends being pushed around or having their arms ripped off. Furthermore I'd like to not go anywhere near Jimmy or Eleanor. And that goes _triple_ for Quana. You make another pervy remark to her and you'll walk the plank!"

Kasimar stopped whimpering pathetically and blinked.

"Wait; you mean you _like_ Quana?" asked Kasimar incredulously.

"Nope; not me. But someone else does. And he is everything you are not." Said Barney as he lowered his fist. "Stop being a bully and grow up peggy! I shall now take my leave and let you dwell on my words."

Barney turned and walked calmly back to camp while Spider took one look at Kasimar and hurried after his friend. Kasimar just stayed there with a shocked look on his face before snarling.

* * *

**Confessional: Glass Cannon?**

**Barney: Maybe I seemed out of character; but listen up maties, bullying is seriously **_**bad**_**. Between Jimmy getting hurt, Quana getting her butt slapped among other things, Spider being threatened and Andy getting a dislocated shoulder it was about time somebody stood up to those two! **(Barney breaths a little and smiles like his normal Genki self). **When I buy the DVD of this season I'm going to watch that scene over and over! Yo ho!**

**Wallace: Don't think I'm a coward; I'm not. I just ran out of insults and wanted to test out my smoke bomb. Besides; real bad guys only hurt little kids and neither Barney or Spider are exactly 'young'. Still; I can get them back later.**

**Kasimar: Ok; it's ON. I **_**really **_**don't like it when people stand up to me. Did I seem afraid? I was not; I just know that pirate freak has a dagger. I'm not aware if it's a fake or not but I don't want to get stabbed.**

**Spider: **(His mouth is hanging open is awe). **Did … did Kasimar just** *cough*** whimper? Is he a** *cough*** coward? I thought he was a fearless** *splutter*** and terrifying bully. Even if he's a coward I'll keep ***sneeze* **a distance from him. I don't want to be ***cough* **hit.**

* * *

Quana thought back to last night at the talent show. Her song was worthy of a ten and chrism gave her a nine simply because she didn't sing about him. What a jerkass!

"_Chris has gotten much worse since last season_." Thought Quana. "_He must have done a lot of level grinding in his nastiness_."

Quana sighed angrily as she entered the mess hall and sat down to wait for breakfast; not that the food was ever anything great but Chef was a little better than at the start of the show. It was thanks to Gary. Shame he was only allowed to cook for Team Jungle. She felt like she could kill for some Chinese food right about now; particularly prawn toast. Obviously she wouldn't go through with it but she would have liked some of her favorite food.

"Wow; there's a happy face." Said a slightly deadpan voice from across the table. Quana looked up and saw Xaria. "Why are you so upset?"

"Because I haven't had any good food in so long and I have a pervert bully leering after me." Explained Quana as she put her elbows on the table and rested her head on her hands. "I know we're supposed to suffer in this contest but it never seemed this bad last season."

"We all suffer at some point in our lives; no point complaining about the inevitable." Shrugged Xaria. "If it makes you feel better then I've suffered just as much as you; if not more."

"That doesn't make me feel better at all." Said Quana in concern. "I don't like anyone suffering. Chris never seemed this bad in the first season He was a jerkass yes but he still wasn't this bad."

"Most people don't seem too bad until you actually know them." Said Xaria with a shrug.

"Yeah; Nakia seemed nice when she asked if she could pair with me in the first challenge … but I quickly learned she's unpleasant and a bit of a spoiled brat. You should have seen how badly she treated Spider just because of his hair." Said Quana in remembrance of the hair obsessed Libby. "You know; Spider seems a little scared of her. Poor guy."

"Hey; I have people I'm scared of too." Affirmed Xaria. "Still; it won't matter anymore once I win this competition. With the million I could move out. Maybe travel around. India sounds nice … what's it like there?"

"I don't know; I've never been." Replied Quana.

"But you're Indian aren't you?" Asked Xaria.

"Nope; I'm Caucasian; I just have a full body tan." Explained Quana.

"Maybe I should get a tan; I hear that popular people have them." Pondered Xaria.

"To be honest being popular isn't all it's cracked up to be; I prefer to hang out with the underdogs of the school system." Said Quana as she thought back to her school. "I just don't know why we can't all get along."

"Morning Quana; morning Xaria." Waved Jimmy as he entered the mess hall and took a seat next to Quana. "Good job with the talent show yesterday Quana; we may have lost but you did really well."

"Thanks Jimmy; you weren't so bad with the jokes either." Said Quana with a small smile before sighing.

Jimmy immediately saw Quana wasn't too happy; come to think of it Xaria didn't look too cheerful either.

"You don't look very happy Quana; neither do you Xaria. Is something wrong?" Asked Jimmy in concern.

"Why do you care?" Asked Xaria.

"I just like to help people when they are sad. Can I help in any way?" Asked Jimmy.

"That's ok Jimmy; unless you feel like going head to head against Kasimar."

Jimmy gulped and nervously tapped his fingers together.

"I don't think it would be a very fair fight; he's seventeen and strong; I'm ten and kinda weedy." Said Jimmy. "Though I'd like to if it helped you."

"You're a regular Dudley Do Right Jimmy." Chuckled Xaria lightly. "I hope you last a long time."

"I hope so too though the prize isn't my concern." Smiled Jimmy. "I'm more concerned with having fun."

* * *

**Confessional: Letter J and have a nice day!**

**Xaria: Jimmy is nice; he's one of the only people on this God forsaken Island that I have nothing bad to say about. But he doesn't need to cheer me up; I'm just the negative complainer. The person that certain people love to torment. **(Xaria sighs).

**Quana: The problem with Kasimar is that no matter how many times I tell him I'm not interested he won't back off. He's really starting to make me feel uncomfortable. I don't think he even likes me for who I am; he just wants to get in my pants. **

**Chris: If that happened it would be good for ratings! Haha!**

**Jimmy: Back home me and my friends are like a sort of mini clique. Each of us plays a role in the group. Ted is the leader, Charles is the brains, Pablo is the funds and voice of reason, Ricky is the one who fixes our bikes and knows several urban legends … and I'm like the gooey sticky stuff that holds us all together.**

* * *

Irene was near camp doing something tree huggers are known for. She was hugging trees and talking to them. Some may have thought it was weird but trees need love too!

"Good day Mr. Oak." Said Irene as she hugged an oak tree. "Hope you're having a good day; plenty of rain in your roots I hope."

Irene let go of the oak and moved on to hug another tree and lived up to her stereotype in doing so.

"Hi Mr. Redwood; I hope Chris doesn't chop you down. If he does make sure to fall on him!" Said Irene with a giggle.

"Err … what are you doing?" Asked Gary as he watched Irene with a confused look on his face.

"Oh hi Gary; I didn't miss breakfast did I?" Asked Irene as she let go of the tree.

"Nope; I was just on my way to the mess hall; but I ask once again, what are you doing?"

"Oh I was just hugging some trees; nothing unusual." Smiled Irene. "So what's for breakfast?"

"Well I was thinking of cooking some sausage and bacon." Said Gary as Irene and him began to walk back to camp. "But I don't really consider it normal to hug a tree. Hugging a dog or a cat I could completely understand; that's fine; but trees?"

"Trees need love too you know." Said Irene in a sing song voice. "You've hugged people before; trees aren't much different."

"Fair enough." Nodded Gary as he saw he couldn't really get a straight answer out of Irene. "So what do you think the challenge today will be?"

"I hope it involves nature; maybe we'll have a leaf collecting contest or an overnight camping trip in the woods." Said Irene hopefully. "So how are you finding your stay on the Island Gary?"

"It's enjoyable; I'm making people happy by cooking for our team and I feel I've done pretty good so far. Though I'm thinking about more than just the money." Said Gary as he smiled to himself.

Irene saw Gary wasn't completely paying attention and thought she could have a little fun with him.

"Think anyone is cute?" Asked Irene casually.

"Well I guess R … hey! I don't think anyone is cute." Said Gary quickly.

"You seem to think Raven is." Giggled Irene.

"…How did you know?" Asked Gary in huge embarrassment.

"Because you said the letter R and Raven is the only person who's name beings with R on this Island. But don't worry; your secret is safe with me; I promise." Said Irene with her usual cheerful smile. "Now let's get breakfast; I'm starving!"

As Irene dashed ahead Gary sighed.

"Me and my big flapper!" Groaned Gary in embarrassment.

* * *

**Confessional: I ship Chef's spatula and whisk!**

**Irene: Awww! How cute! Looks like someone is in loooooove! **(Irene burst out into giggles but controls herself and smiles). **I won't break my promise; Gary doesn't have to worry. Him and Raven … that might actually work. What can I say? Besides trees I kind of like romantic things like Lady and the Tramp. **

**Gary: Ok; I like Raven, so what? Well; I guess I kind of have a crush on her but I'm not the only person dealing with affection issues here; Vinnie likes Uzuri as well. I wonder what Raven thinks of me … you know; it's a good thing nobody can hear us in these confessionals.**

* * *

A short while later the seventeen campers were seated in the mess hall in their teams. Those that had already eaten just talked to each other while the others forcefully ate their meal. Chef may have been improving but there was a big difference between a purple carrot and a fine meal. But it could have been worse.

"Hey guys." Said Vinnie as he finished his sausage. "Have any of you seen one of these around today?"

As he said this Vinnie held up a Pikmin plushie.

"Ooo! That's a Pikmin! I love those games." Said Uzuri with a look of memory. "It's full of nature, monsters and little creatures shaped like carrots. A true classic."

"I would have thought you would like violent games Uzuri." Said Tabitha as she looked at the Pikmin plushie.

"Well Gears of war is my favorite." Smiled Uzuri as she ate some bacon. "I just love the Chainsaw Bayonet."

"So why did you ask us Vinnie?" Asked Tabitha as she quickly changed the subject.

"Well I've been noticing these so called Pikmin plushies around camp; also I saw the Nintendo logo on the door of each cabin on a sticker."

"I think Sega is better." Said Irene cheerfully. "The sonic series has more nature than the Mario series like Frog Forest in sonic heroes. Though this Pikmin series sounds interesting."

The doors to the mess hall burst open and in walked Chris. Oddly enough he wasn't dressed in his usual cloths … he was dressed as a space man thought he lacked the helmet. And the outfit looked a little small for him. Understandably a number of campers started laughing.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris as he stamped his feet. "Don't you know who I am?"

"A loser?" Guessed Mable.

"No! Grrrr! I'm dressed as Captain Olimar; the main character from the Pikmin series that was made by the wonderful and super duper Nintendo games company. Did I mention how great they are? I hope so because I want everyone to know that Nintendo rules!" Said Chris as he gave the thumbs up to the camera.

"So … is our challenge to do with Nintendo?" Asked Raven.

"Indeed it is; today we are going to be basing our challenge on the awesome of game from the awesome company. Today's challenge will be about … Pikmin!"

"Yay!" Squeed Uzuri. "This is going to be fun!"

"Don't interrupt me … ever!" Growled Chris. "Today's challenge will be full of Bulborbs, Blowhogs, Snagrets, Bloysters and Bulblaxes."

"Err … what the heck are you talking about?" Asked Quana in confusion while a lot of the other campers scratched their heads.

"They're enemies dreamed up by the wonderful creative people at the great Nintendo Corporation." Sighed Chris. "Why do you have to be so blond?"

"I'm a brunette." Said Quana. "Duh."

"Well you have blond highlights; that's blond to me!" Chuckled Chris.

"They're stylish." Said Quana irritably.

"Whatever; it doesn't matter. We need to go outside and brief you on the rules and get you suited up." Said Chris as he activated a funny sounding whistle on hid space suit. "Ok Pikmin; follow your leader!"

Chris marched out and the campers grudgingly followed; but only because they had to for most of them didn't like the asshole host.

* * *

**Confessional: Nintendo + Sega = Segendo**

**Uzuri: This will be fun; Pikmin is a good way to pass the time when real life gets you down … as it does to me kind of often. But nonetheless; I'm going to have fun! Teehee!**

**Spider: I've never played the ***cough* **Pikmin games. The only console I own is ***sneeze* **A Nintendo 64. It's a bit ***cough* **dated but the games are really fun.**

**Xaria: I don't mind Nintendo too much; but I'm more of a girl for the classic. I have a NES back home. Very old but older is always better than new. Have you seen the sonic games lately?**

**Wallace: I like any video game where you can take over the world or commit evil deeds! Mwahahahahahaha! Still; how bad could this be?**

**Irene: I don't play video games very often; I prefer to be outside in the woods. But I like the sound of this Pikmin thing so far.**

**Chris: Thanks to my awesome negotiation skills and dashing good looks I secured a sponsorship from Nintendo, the best games company EVER, full stop. I get paid to mention how great they are, which is true, so by the end of the day I'll have lots of green in the blue. Green being money and blue being my pants. Ok; so my pants are tan. But green in the blue sounds better … Nintendo rules!**

* * *

A challenge based on Pikmin; that hasn't been done before right? Expect more funniness and drama in the next chapter where another camper walks the dock of shame.


	20. Day 9, Part 2, Planet of the Pikmin

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or "The Season That Must Never Be Named". They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme, that belongs to Frank15 and hi story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains bullying, kissing, bee stings, some ship tease, a condom related insult and manipulation. Nothing M rated though.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable VinniexUzuri GaryxRaven and a secret pairing.

**Note: **Ok every one; I am very sorry about the long wait for this chapter, I was distracted by real life and … littlebigplanet 2. Visit my deviantart page for full details. But hopefully this extra large chapter should make up for it. It's over fifty pages long! Sit back and enjoy the show!

**Poll:** I have a new poll open; this one asks who do you want to win. I must warn you that reading it will spoil who gets voted off in this chapter. Give it a vote if you have time because I'd like to see who you, the fans, want to see win.

**Review Answers**

**Bad-asp:** I'm glad you liked the chapter; this chapter is going to be even better hopefully. And yes; Uzuri's art is quite creepy indeed isn't it?

Three, two, one, we have lift off!

* * *

Chris and the seventeen campers were gathered around camp center; three large model space ships had been set up and each had the logo of one of the teams imprinted on it along with the Nintendo Logo. A large box labeled 'embarrassing costumes' was in the vicinity as well.

"Well losers; what do you think?" Asked Chris as the campers looked at the props.

"What we think of your stupid costume or what we think of the models?" Asked Mable as he chuckled at Chris's silly outfit.

"Shut up! It's a good costume!" Whined Chris like a bratty kid not getting sweets. "Do you want to know the rules of the challenge or not?"

"Well seeing as we can't do the challenge if we don't know what to do…" Said Gary in a snarky voice. "It would make sense."

"Good; so shut up!" Snapped Chris. "As you know; today's challenge is based on Pikmin, the great game from the world famous and beloved Nintendo Corporation. Such a wonderful company full of saintly, kind and considerate individuals with great creative minds."

"Are you quite finished?" Asked Tabitha dully.

"Whatever! The objective of the game is simple; you should already know what to do if you've played the first Pikmin game like I'm sure most of you have." Assumed Chris.

Everyone was silent for a few seconds before Uzuri raised her hand.

"Yes; what is it Uzuri?" Asked Chris dryly.

"I think I'm the only one who has played any of the Pikmin games; maybe I should tell the others about it." Suggested Uzuri.

"No! You're not getting any of my screen time!" Roared Chris. "I'll just have to explain it myself."

"You've played *cough* Pikmin?" Asked Spider doubtfully.

"I've read the instruction manual." Said Chris with an impatient wave of his hand. "Anyway; the first game in the wonderful series made by the awesome company had Captain Olimar stranded on an alien world with thirty days to recover his thirty ship parts or die. It must have been hard for him."

"But you only need twenty five of the parts; five of them aren't needed." Pointed out Uzuri sweetly.

"Shut … up." Hissed Chris. "Anyway; the key words in that were ship parts; you lot are going to be looking around Wawanakwa Island for ship parts for your space ships. Since finding thirty parts for each team would take too long and I'd get bored I've cut the total you need down to ten out of a possible twenty seven."

"But then there isn't enough for each of us." Said Quana as she ran a hand through her blond highlights. "Why is that?"

"Isn't it obvious? It's because that way one team will surely fail and we can easily decide a winner."

"But what if each team found nine?" Asked Jimmy. "Then there would be a three way tie."

Chris's eye twitched.

* * *

**Confessional: Meltdown in three, two, one.**

**Chris:** (Flailing his arms around and bawling like a baby).** Waaaaaaah! I hate him I hate him I hate him! They're just stupid contestants with no characterization! They aren't supposed to point out flaws! No fair no fair no fair!**

**Jimmy: Why do I get the feeling a baby was crying in here recently?**

**Chef: Chris should pull himself together! It's no big deal; everyone makes mistakes. Yeesh; he's certainly changed for the worse since last year. Besides; adults don't cry!**

* * *

"That won't happen; I say it won't so therefore it will not." Said Chris as he folded his arms. "The first team to bring ten ship parts back to their ship wins immunity. The next team to bring ten comes second. In the case of neither team having ten then the team will more parts will be safe."

"What about if both of the other teams have the same amount. Some of the parts probably won't be found." Said Lavender.

"I'm getting to that!" Whined Chris. "In the event of a tie the first team to arrive comes second. Basically just collect as many parts as you can and be back here by sundown."

"Is that it?" Asked Irene with a relieved smile. "It seems tame compared to your usual challenges."

"Well it is pretty tame … if you don't take the robotic monsters into account." Said Chris with a chuckle.

* * *

**Confessional: Accountants are boring!**

**Irene: And with that all feeling I had that this challenge was tame left me.**

**Wallace: Robots? This is going to be interesting; I'll have plenty of use for the hacker tether! Mwahahahahaha!**

* * *

"Robot monsters?" Repeated Raven with a gulp.

"What? Scared of a few monsters are you little girl?" Chuckled Kasimar. "What a wimp! You gonna wet yourself little scare baby? Yahahaha!"

SHA-KICK!

Lavender kicked Kasimar in the balls and he dropped to his knees in pain.

"I … hate … you." Whimpered Kasimar in a squeaky voice.

"Anyway; the monsters are based on the enemies from the both Pikmin games." Explained Chris with a pleased expression because of the camper's nervousness. "They are completely vulnerable to destruction and sometimes guard a ship part. You'll have to figure out how to beat them though! Haha!"

"So … any other surprises?" Asked Quana hesitantly.

"Just one; you'll be wearing hats during the challenge." Smirked Chris as he took a stem and flower hat out from the box of embarrassing costumes. "Take them off and you're out."

* * *

**Confessional: Some people have NO taste in headgear.**

**Kasimar: **(He is wearing a Pikmin hat and looks angry). **Does Chris think it's funny to play dress up? Only girls, little pixies and gays play dress up! I do not! This sucks! Raaaaaar!**

**Irene: This reminds me of the times I would dress up as a tree for costume parties when I was younger. Good times.**

* * *

A few minutes later the campers were decked out in Pikmin hats; the campers who normally wore hats had to take theirs off so that the new ones could properly fit on. The hats looked ridiculous; most of the campers didn't like them very much but Chris didn't care.

"So; anymore questions?" Asked Chris.

"What do the ship parts looked like?" Asked Eleanor logically. "It won't do us much good looking for the parts if we don't know what they look like."

"It doesn't matter; basically just look for large springs or batteries, they'll stand out and aren't too heavy." Said Chris impatiently. "Can we get this challenge started already? I have a massage in twenty minutes!"

"Fine by me; when do we start?" Asked Uzuri excitedly.

"You'll start right about … now!" Said Chris with a clap of his hands. "Off you go; go collect parts and fight monsters."

The campers ran off into the woods in their teams while Chris laughed sadistically.

"I wonder if the robots will hurt anyone." Said Chris gleefully. "They weren't programmed to but there's always a chance! Haha!"

"Seriously Chris; you're going too far." Said Chef disapprovingly. "You can't actively try to hurt the campers or hope they get hurt."

"Oh shut up Chef; I don't have to listen to a supporting character." Snapped Chris smugly. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm going for my massage; maybe I can get the girl's number."

* * *

**Confessional: Massage to the max!**

**Lavender: This challenge doesn't sound so hard; I mean, aside from the robotic monsters I think we'll go pretty well. We've got the most people and Oscar could easily punch out a monster.**

**Oscar: How did Chris manage to afford these robots?**

**Chris: Sponsorship from Nintendo pays big bucks and seriously; they have some good engineers in their ranks.**

* * *

The five members of Team Puzzle had ran a fair distance from the other teams and were leisurely walking through the woods looking out for any ship parts that may have been nearby.

"Yaaaar; where could those ship parts be?" Asked Barney as he looked around and scanned the area with his blue eyes. "I don't want to be stuck on this alien world forever!"

"It's not real Barney." Giggled Quana which made Spider's stomach flutter.

"True; but a little imagination here and there never hurt anyone." Grinned Barney.

"It hurt Squidward." Said Jimmy with his usual smile. "Remember the imagination episode of SpongeBob with the box?"

"Oh yeah; that show was the highlight of my childhood. Patchy the Pirate and the flying Dutchman were the best." Said Barney as he thought back to the many hours he would spend watching his SpongeBob DVD's.

"I think I see a ship part." Said Eleanor suddenly as she pointed ahead. Sure enough a chrome colored spring was just up ahead lying on the ground.

"I'll get *cough* it." Said Spider as he made his way quickly towards the spring.

Just before he got to it he heard a wobbly mechanical sound. Spider looked around and 'meeped'. Out from the trees walked what looked like a giant mushroom on legs. It hobbled over to him at quite a speed and stood still for a moment.

"Oh dear." Said Spider as he quickly grabbed the spring and made to run back to his team.

Before he could move a single step the mushroom swelled up a little and expelled some purple fumes. The fumes entered Spider's nostrils and his eyes widened.

"I think I'm *cough* gonna." Said Spider as he held his mouth and ran over to the bushes and puked.

"Yikes! What is this thing?" Asked Jimmy as the mushroom thing turned its attention to the others.

"This won't take but a freckle past a peg leg." Said Barney confidently as he withdrew his fake dagger and tapped the sharp point with his finger. He threw the dagger like a boomerang and it pierced the mushroom's body.

POP!

The mushroom popped like a balloon and fell to pieces as Barney caught his dagger.

"Spider! Are you ok?" Asked Quana in worry as she ran over to the sick teen. "Do you need to go back to camp?"

* * *

**Confessional: Mama Bear.**

**Barney: **(He is grinning slyly). **Looks like **_**someone**_** is getting quite protective of a certain sick kid. That shows I'm doing my job right.**

* * *

Spider groaned and mustered a smile as he shook his head.

"Don't worry Quana; I'll be *cough* ok." Said Spider as he wiped his mouth. "I just hope nobody *sneeze* steps in that. But I got a *cough* ship part."

Spider held up the spring as he got to his feet.

"Good job Spider." Smiled Eleanor. "We're ten percent of the way to victory; it's a start!"

"Which way should we *cough* go now?" Asked Spider still woozy from the vile fumes.

"Maybe we could go that way." Said Jimmy as he pointed to his left.

"I think we should go this way." Said Quana as she pointed to the right.

Barney thought for a moment; there had to be a way to use this to his matchmaking advantage; he then had an idea.

"I have an idea; let's split up!" Suggested Barney enthusiastically. "Jimmy and Eleanor can go one way and I, Spider and Quana can go the other way. We'll cover more ground and stand more chance of winning. What do you say?"

"Sounds fine to me." Smiled Eleanor. "What say you Jimmy?"

"I don't mind at all; you're my friend like everyone else so it's all good." Said Jimmy with his smile still plastered on his face.

"Sure; the hero, the lancer and the chick." Said Quana with a chuckle. "Splitting up usually works pretty well; particularly if you're Scooby Doo and Co."

"…Well Barney; you're team *cough* leader, you know best." Said Spider with a small smile as he tried to stop himself glancing at Quana.

"Leader? I never said that me heartie." Said Barney while stroking his chin in thought. "Still; leader has a nice sea shanty ring to it. Shall we be off then?"

"Let's go." Cheered Jimmy as he set off deeper into the woods.

"See you later guys." Waved Eleanor as she took off after Jimmy.

"Well me Cabin boy and girl; it's just the three of us against the offspring of Mother Nature's evil twin." Said Barney as he put an arm around both Spider and Quana at the same time and pulled them closer. "Let's get to it!"

"Sure; but please let go off me first; I prefer people to let me know if they want to hug me." Said Quana with an amused smile.

As Quana walked ahead Barney turned to Spider.

"Make a mental note of that me heartie." Advised Barney

* * *

**Confessional: Split up and look for clues.**

**Eleanor: I hope we don't run into too many monsters; I'm not particularly fond of stuff like undead and giant monstrous bugs. But having Jimmy around makes me want to smile; he just gives off a positive aura you know?**

**Barney: This is a good way to split us up. Spider and Quana can bond while I give my protégé some pointers. That leaves the youngsters to hang out and gather more ship parts. And hey; if a toy ship develops then I can die happy. Yohoho! Just kidding!**

**Quana: Poor Spider; he isn't very lucky is he? I hope he gets something nice by the end of the competition. I'm thankful I didn't smell those fumes because Spider looked even paler than usual after puking. Ouch. Poor little guy; it's a shame someone nice like him has to suffer while people like Kasimar go far. Spider's nice, smart and cute … wait; cute? Where did that come from?**

**Chris:** (He looks angry). **They weren't supposed to actually destroy the robots! There was an off button on it! Each of the robots has one; how could they not know that?**

* * *

Raven was walking with her team through the woods; they hadn't found any parts so far but it was surely a matter of time before they found some. She had been feeling less moe and shy everyday since she arrived on the island; this had so far been a beneficial experience. And then there was the fact someone had kinda caught her eye…

"Where are the ship parts?" Asked Kasimar with a grunt. "I want this over as soon as possible so I can get rid of this sissy hat!"

"They'll obviously be hidden." Said Lavender. "That or guarded by monsters; most of them won't be out in the open just waiting for us."

"Oh shut up you!" Yelled Kasimar with piercing eyes. "What I don't get is how you can even be out in the daytime."

"What does he mean by that?" Asked Raven.

"I mean that gingers have a complete aversion to sunlight; they can't go out in the day." Pointed out Kasimar as if it were as plain as day.

"That's complete crap." Said Xaria with a growl. "In case you haven't noticed Lavender, Wallace, Vinnie and Patch all have red hair and they haven't had a problem going out in the day!"

"Maybe they're a new breed of ginger." Shrugged Kasimar indifferently.

"Why do you hold this stupid prejudice?" Asked Oscar in disbelief. "Are you retarded or just plain high?"

"Everyone has some form of pet peeve or prejudice against something like gays, Christians and hippies." Explained Kasimar. "I'm just like everyone else."

"…You're a dick; you know that." Said Mable with agitation.

* * *

**Confessional: Jaw dropper.**

**Lavender: That's another form of prejudice I've had to put up with; why can't we all just get along? Kasimar must have some insecurity or weakness … if only I knew what it was. Maybe then I could exploit it against him.**

**Oscar: Xaria's right; Kasimar just talks a load of garbage! Though there is one advantage if we lose…**

* * *

"Ok; that's it; if we lose you're next for the dock of shame; I guarantee it." Growled Lavender.

"What'evs." Shrugged Kasimar as he walked up to a tree and punched it.

"What was the pint in that?" Asked Xaria snarkly.

A large hollow battery fell from the tree to Kasimar's feet and he crossed his arms triumphantly.

"Found a part." Smirked Kasimar as he picked it up and tossed it to Mable.

"…Thanks." Said Mable in a _very_ forced voice.

"Well everyone; this is where good and evil go on separate paths; if you need me and Kasimar we'll be causing mayhem on the dark side." Said Wallace as he took out the Hacker Tether. "I'll just be 'tilting the odds in our favor'. Mwahahahahaha!"

Wallace whipped out his remote and pressed a button; his theme music began to play from nowhere.

"Ok; seriously, where the heck does that music keep coming from?" Asked Lavender. "It's impossible to just be able to play it from anywhere at the click of a button. How do you do it?"

"As I've said before; that is classified information." Chuckled Wallace sinisterly. "Maybe if you came over to the dark side I'd tell you."

"And why would I; or indeed anyone else want to do that?" Asked Lavender with crossed arms.

"It's a great life! No rules, no accountability, you can whatever you want without guilt because that emotion dies once you change sides." Explained Wallace. "Now if you'll excuse me I must be going."

Wallace swished his leather jacket and left the group laughing evilly. Kasimar sighed but grinned obnoxiously.

"He may be insane and not truly evil but he's right about the life of a bad guy. I'll see you later everyone; so long douche nozzles." Said Kasimar as he left after Wallace into the woods.

Once he was gone Mable chuckled.

"Seriously; is 'douche nozzles' the best insult he can come up with?" Asked Mable in amusement.

"He can come up with some pretty bad ones." Said Oscar as he clenched his fists.

"Like what?" Asked Mable.

"He called me, and I quote, a 'stillborn tapeworm'." Said Oscar as he looked hatefully in the direction Kasimar had left.

"That … that's actually kind of funny; it's a bit laughable to be honest." Said Mable with a smile. "Why take it so seriously?"

"Because … because one of my aunts had a stillbirth last year." Said Oscar tonelessly.

The four girls gasped in horror as this revelation. That was terrible! No wonder it had upset him; that sort of occurrence was very traumatic.

* * *

**Confessional: Oh … My … God.**

**Oscar: Bad things happen to everyone; but it just feels unjust that things like that have to happen. God people like Aunt Harriet don't deserve that when there are rotten toe rags like Kasimar on the loose.**

**Mable: **(She is staring at the camera with her mouth agape). **I shouldn't have said that.**

**Raven: That poor innocent woman! That must have been such a terrible time.**

* * *

"Oh my goodness." Said Lavender as he covered her mouth with her hand in shock. "Did … did she ever recover from that emotional blow?"

"She's better now but the sounds of her crying were quite … haunting to put it lightly." Said Oscar with a sigh. "It was completely needless suffering."

"Welcome to my world friend." Said Xaria with crossed arms and a sigh.

"Oscar; I am _so_ sorry I found the insult funny; can you forgive me?" Asked Mable almost tearfully.

"I can't forgive you because there is nothing to forgive." Said Oscar with a small smile.

The five stood in silence for a minute; it was Oscar who broke the silence.

"Though I enjoy talking to you girls I think we should keep going in this challenge." Said Oscar as he then glanced after the direction Kasimar and Wallace had gone. "I think we should follow the lead of Wallace and He Who Must Not Be Named; we should split up."

"Good idea; we'll cover more ground and get the ten parts quicker." Agreed Lavender. "So; how should we split up?"

"I don't really mind who I'm with; you're all my friends." Shrugged Oscar.

Lavender thought for a moment and quickly came up with a solution.

"How about I go with Mable and Raven and you and Xaria go together; if you don't mind that is." Suggested Lavender.

"I see no problem." Said Oscar and he and Xaria locked eyes for a moment.

"…Fine by me." Shrugged Xaria indifferently.

"Great!" Clapped Lavender. "But don't head back to camp until you have at least two parts so you don't have to keep making back and forth journey's."

"Got it." Nodded Oscar with a salute. "Shall we start our search Xaria?"

"Well; since I've got nothing better to do…" Said Xaria as she followed after Oscar with her hands in her pockets.

* * *

**Confessional: I on the other hand have lots to do.**

**Xaria: Looks like me and Oscar both have had some dark and troubled things in our past; well, he has my sympathies … though my opinion by itself means little.**

**Lavender: Though I can't trust Kasimar and Wallace as far as I can throw them- not very far- I feel confident that the rest of us will find enough ship parts. **

**Oscar: Maybe this would be a good time to just talk to Xaria; maybe get to know her and perhaps ask her why she was so bothered in the torture challenge. I just hope she doesn't get angry.**

* * *

Tabitha was leading her team through the woods and was keeping her eyes out for ship parts; they needed to win this as they only had five team members left. And if Team Puzzle lost then Tabitha's team would no longer have the fewest members; that would make it easier for Tabitha in the long run as a few of the people on Team Puzzle could be potential threats once the merge arrived.

"Do any of you see any parts?" Asked Tabitha as they passed under a large tree.

"Not yet; but they can't be that hard to find." Said Gary as he looked into a bush.

"Maybe we should make a lot of noise and attract some monsters." Suggested Uzuri.

"How would that help?" Asked Irene in puzzlement.

"Chris said the monsters might be guarding parts so if we lure a monster we'll get a part." Explained Uzuri. "Maybe we'll run into a bulborb; I hope so! They're so cutesy!"

"How would we get rid of the monster anyway?" Asked Vinnie. "It's not like they're going to surrender and they're likely made of metal. What's your plan?"

"Everything has a weakness; you've just gotta exploit it! Like plant monsters are easy to put to sleep, fire works well on ice and vice versa, flying monsters get dizzy easily and light is beaten by dark and vice versa. You juss gotta use your blood filled noggin. Teehee!" Explained Uzuri with a childish giggle.

While Vinnie, Gary and Irene looked impressed Tabitha mentally face palmed.

* * *

**Confessional: RPG; Role Playing Game or Rocket Propelled Grenade?**

**Tabitha: Is Uzuri so delusionally insane that she thinks life is like a video game? With few exceptions video games are stupid. I only care for the Sims as it allows me to control someone, something I'm fairly good at. I'm controlling Uzuri right now aren't I?**

**Vinnie: Wow; I wonder where Uzuri learned all that. Wow; cute and smart, that's a very nice combination. People should give her more of a chance; but it's good to see her and Tabitha are good friends.**

**Uzuri: Teehee! I just found that stuff out from the internet; I don't often play RPG's, they're too tame. I much prefer Gears of War and Silent Hill.**

* * *

"How do you know all that stuff?" Asked Vinnie in wonder.

"From the internet and video games." Smiled Uzuri. "I tend to prefer survival horrors though; Silent Hill is the scariest series; seriously, the greatest foe I have ever faced is definitely Amnion."

"What's that?" asked Irene uncertainly. "Is it some sort of demon?"

"Nope!" Smiled Uzuri sweetly.

"So what is it?" Asked Irene in relief.

"A Bio-Organic spider born from revenge, hatred, fear and regret." Said Uzuri creepily. "Its face can stretch into … layers."

"Doesn't sound so bad." Shrugged Tabitha. "If I met it I know wouldn't be scared of it."

"I probably would be." Gulped Irene. "Could we talk about something else?"

"I second that emotion." Said Gary with an uneasy look. "As _wonderful_ as Silent Hill sounds I would prefer a slightly less creepy conversation."

"How about this; I found a ship part." Said Vinnie as he reached into a hollow log and came out with a large spring.

"Good job Vinnie." Said Tabitha with a clap. "One down and only nine more to go."

"So Vinnie; if a big monster with a giant sharp toothed maw appeared and tried to kill us with bites and roars could you beat it?" Asked Uzuri sweetly.

"I guess I could try; sure, why not." Smiled Vinnie while wondering where this conversation was leading.

"Good because here comes one now!" Giggled Uzuri with wide eyes.

Vinnie and others turned around and saw what Uzuri had been talking about, a large bulbous bodied creature, obviously robotic, was standing by them and looking down on them with stalk eyes. Its back was red with white spots and two legs that looked like those of a chicken, sorta, were supporting it.

"I know Chris said monsters but isn't that _just_ a teensy little bit extreme?" Asked Gary as he backed away from the robot.

"Don't worry everyone." Chirped Uzuri as she gazed at the monster.

"Why exactly shouldn't we worry?" Asked Tabitha incredulously. "Not to be rude but look at the size of that thing!"

"Uzuri's the one who's played Pikmin; we should listen to her." Said Vinnie as the monster let out a mechanical roar. "So Uzuri; what is this thing?"

"That's a Spotty Bulborb though it was later renamed the Red Bulborb. Frontal attacks aren't recommended so it's best in the game to attack from behind; maybe the same will apply here." Suggested Uzuri.

The beast tried to bite Vinnie but he ran underneath it and it bit into the ground. Vinnie looked up and saw a large switch on its back. That must have been the weak spot. Vinnie jumped up and pulled the switch down.

"Shutting down, entering pooooweeer saaaaaviiing mooooode." Said the robot in an emotionless voice as it stopped working.

"…That was easy." Said Vinnie with a surprised blink. "I would have thought that since it's so big it would have stepped on one of us."

"Yay Vinnie! The monster is dead!" Cheered Uzuri.

"I don't think robot's can die as they have no real life in the first place." Said Tabitha as she looked over the fallen robot.

"How do you kill that which has no life?" Asked Gary with a 'hmmm'.

"Err … stab it in the heart with a stake?" Guessed Irene.

"Expose it directly to sunlight?" Suggested Vinnie.

"Show it a crucifix?" Giggled Uzuri.

"It was a rhetorical question." Said Gary before laughing. "And all of your suggestions are to do with vampires."

"Vampires aren't scary." Said Uzuri with crossed arms and a frown. "Nowadays people see them as angsty glittery bad boyfriends rather than the blood sucking terrors of the night they once were."

"I don't mind Twilight." Said Tabitha opinionatedly. "It had a good plot. But enough talk on creatures that don't exist, we need to keep moving. I suggest we go different ways."

"Yeah! Let's split up and look for clu… err … ship parts." Agreed Irene.

"So; how about I go with Uzuri since we work well together and … Vinnie; you and Irene seem to be somewhat chummy. You could work together; unless you have any objections." Said Tabitha strategically.

"Naw; it's all good." Smiled Irene. "But what about Gary?"

"Looks like I'm flying solo." Said Gary with a nod of indifference. "No problem."

"You sure?" Asked Tabitha to be certain Gary was ok with this as to not arise any even minor suspicion. "There are a number of monsters around you know."

"No worries; I have something they don't." Smirked Gary as he took out two spatulas. "The spatula chucks."

"…Really." Said Vinnie with a look of doubt.

"I made them in a metal work class; just press the button on the handle and the chains extend. I'll see you all later; the longer we stand around the less chance we have of winning." Said Gary as he left the group and went deeper into the forest.

"Well; looks like Irene and me will go this way." Said Vinnie. "See you later Tabitha and Uzuri."

Vinnie and Irene left a different way than Gary and after a few moments Tabitha and Uzuri walked a different way.

"You know Tabitha; you're my best friend and all but I would have kinda liked to go with Vinnie." Said Uzuri as they walked along.

"I know; but if you two began flirting you would get distracted from the challenge. You can talk to him all you want between the challenges. And come to think of it he still owes me a favor. Hmmmm." Said Tabitha as she stroked her smooth chin in thought.

"What are you going to ask him to do … I _hope_ you aren't going to ask him to give you a massage; huh, huh?" Said Uzuri half jokingly and half seriously.

"Absolutely not." Promised Tabitha while inwardly wondering why anyone would even _think_ of wanting a massage from the metal armed shorty.

* * *

**Confessional: I could do with a massage; my hinges are getting stiff.**

**Tabitha: I can see two problems with getting a massage from Vinnie. The first is that he has a metal arm and that wouldn't feel very relaxing would it? The second problem is that he's an unpopular lout. But if he and Uzuri like each other it's no skin off my bones, I'll just get the better deal in the end anyway.**

**Uzuri: Tabitha may be really smart and great at leadership but one thing she doesn't realize is that you must **_**never**_** tempt fate; if she says she isn't scared of Amnion then it's likely that that could backfire on her if there was a Silent Hill challenge … I really do hope she won't suffer any ill effects of her words.**

**Chris: How did she know there's going to be a silent hill challenge … I mean; not that there will be! I'll just edit this out … Uzuri sucks!**

**Irene: I don't know why … but I have a feeling someone just said something epically pathetic … oh well; probably not important.**

**Gary: Catering may be not only my prime interest but also my main hobby … but I like other things as well such as boxing and metal work; combining the last two should make this challenge easier.**

* * *

The hero, the lancer and the chick, AKA Spider, Barney and Quana were still looking for ship parts; they only had one so far, the part that Spider had found earlier. Barney was thinking of two things at once; the first thought was how to find some ship parts and fast. The second part was what his next matchmaking strategy would be.

"Do either of you two see a ship part?" Asked Barney over his shoulder as he looking into a hollow tree.

"Not yet." Replied Quana. "But if we do find any they hopefully won't be guarded by any monsters; I hope they aren't any bigger than that mushroom thing."

"The only *cough* monsters I like are *sneeze* Mike and Sulley from Monsters Inc." Said Spider as he blew his nose on a tissue. "The first time I heard *cough* the movie name I thought it was a new type of *hard cough* ink for kids. But I was less than ten *cough* years old at the time."

"Good one Spider; we all say funny things when we're young don't we?" Smiled Quana with a chuckle. "I remember one time in Wal-Mart when I was young my daddy said he'd forgotten to buy the marinade. I offered to get it. He asked if I knew what it was, I said it was like lemonade but made with marins. Boy did I feel silly later."

All three teens laughed as they continued their search though silence didn't last very long.

"I hate to say it guys but if we don't win this challenge we'll be at a disadvantage; if we come last our team will be down to four members; understand what I mean yaaaar?" Asked Barney as he leaned into a large bush.

"That we should keep moving?" Guessed Quana.

"True; and also that the next person on the team to leave could be any of us." Continued Barney. "Once we're out … then that's it; we have no chance at the million. Hopefully we won't lose because I'd like to buy a mighty pirate ship like the one Blackbeard had."

"Dare I ask why *cough* you would buy one?" Asked Spider with an arched eyebrow.

"So I can sail the seven seas and explore the world of course!" Said Barney with an air of want in his voice. "Oh; and I found a part."

Barney leaned back out of the bush holding a large yet light battery.

"That's two down eight to go unless Jimmy and Eleanor have managed to find some parts." Said Barney as he tossed the battery up and rolled it across his shoulders before catching it again.

"So what would you guys spend the money on?" Asked Barney. "You could be my crew!"

"I'd finance my entrance to the singing world and also buy a PS3." Said Quana promptly.

"I'd pay for the best *cough* medicine a million could buy *cough* so I'd finally be well and normal." Said Spider. "I've already got most of *sneeze* what I could want."

"Don't worry about not being normal; I remember a saying to do with that sort of thing." Said Quana nicely. "Want to hear it?"

"Sure; indulge me in your *cough* wisdom." Agreed Spider with another cough.

"If you see people who don't like who you are for being you; you don't have a problem, the problem is them." Said Quana. "Sometimes people who call others freaks and the like are just plain jealous."

"Jealous of *cough* my illness?" Asked Spider skeptically.

"Well; not that … but of your positive traits. Come to think of it you're kind of Kasimar's opposite." Said Quana with a finger to her chin. "You're nice, he's malicious, you're smart, he's ... not smart in the same way and you're sane, he's a brutal sociopath."

"Spoken like a true friend and role model." Smiled Barney. "All that glitters is not gold; and to make the mood even better I can see another ship part; who is going to get this one yaaar?"."

"I'll get it." Said Quana. "Where is it?"

"Over there next to the frog thing." Said Barney as he pointed to a nearby ankle deep pool of water. Quana followed his hand and blinked in surprise.

* * *

**Confessional: So … how did he croak?**

**Quana: I've never really liked frogs … they're slimy and covered in pond muck! And the size of that one; well, I've never seen a human sized frog before but I suppose there is a first time for everything. … To be honest the only frog I've ever liked is Kermit.**

* * *

"I see; so how to you propose we'll deal with the so called 'frog thing'?" Asked Quana.

The so called 'frog thing' was about as tall as Barney and as wide as Patch. It was coloured yellow with hints of green here and there. Its eyes looked soulless and Quana couldn't help but wonder why it wasn't getting damaged because of the water.

"Hmmmm … expose it directly to sunlight?" Suggested Barney.

"That's *cough* vampires." Said Spider.

"Splash it with holy water?" Guessed Barney.

"That's vampires again." Said Quana.

"Err … show it a crucifix?" Said Barney with a shrug.

"That's still vampires!" Yelled Spider and Quana in perfect two piece harmony.

"Wow; vampires are wimps." Chuckled Barney. "Well; this is nothing a little team work can't solve. Let's send this croaky abomination to Davie Jones Locker; we might find some garlic we can throw at it!"

"Very good; what *cough* he said." Shrugged Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Twilight ruined vampires.**

**Barney: How was I supposed to know frog mutants weren't affected to that kind of stuff? Hmmm … maybe we could try weighing it down so it can't jump.**

**Spider: I don't like monsters and** *cough*** undead stuff; that much I and Quana have in common. And most** *sneeze*** monsters I know of can't be killed by** *cough*** mundane means; you need special stuff. The only real exception is zombies … how ***cough*** I wish I'd never played Resident Evil.**

* * *

Jimmy was following Eleanor through the woods as they strolled along leisurely. Eleanor was admiring the little critters like rabbits and squirrels that came into sight every once in a while. Eleanor seemed in touch with nature; Jimmy loved animals as well but he didn't know a quarter of the stuff Eleanor did.

"Its nice being out in the woods isn't it." Said Eleanor as she put her hands in her pockets. "Just yourself and nature bonding internally. I get a warm fuzzy when I go to places with lots of animals; it's why I like the zoo so much."

"I like the woods." Agreed Jimmy with a few nods which made the bobble on his hat bounce around. "I and the guys have gone camping before when we were at Pablo's Uncles forest estate. I learned a lot that time … especially to never let Ricky open a jumbo sized packet of potato chips; they were everywhere!"

"You've mentioned your friends a few times before." Said Eleanor interestedly. "Aren't they called Ted, Pablo, Ricky and Charles?"

"That's right." Affirmed Jimmy. "We met each other in kindergarten and we've been friends ever since. We get up to all kinds of mischief … though sometimes Ted's get rich quick schemes backfire a little like the time he entered us in a wrestling competition."

* * *

**Confessional: My ring name was the Confessor!**

**Jimmy: After that fateful day I've rather lost interest in wrestling permanently; rope friction burns are really not fun!**

* * *

"It's good that you have a close circle of friends; true friends that stick together through the thick and the thin." Smiled Eleanor as she reached into a log and took out a spring. "Here's a part. Though while we're on the subject of parts … how are we going to carry them? We may find more than we can carry."

"That's an easy fix." Said Jimmy with no worry as he took his normal hat out of his pocket and stretched it a little. "My beanie is super stretchy; we could easily fit the parts in here."

"Good idea Jimmy." Said Eleanor with a nod. "Say … when was the last time you had a haircut?"

Eleanor was right to say this; Jimmy's hair was violent blond and went down to his neck, it curled in every which way and had no tameness. It was a wild mess.

"I just don't like getting a haircut." Explained Jimmy. "It itches so much; but I take good care of my hair, I wash it and I don't have dandruff."

"You don't go to Nakia's level do you?" Asked Eleanor.

"Of course not." Said Jimmy quickly. "She is both prejudice and mean … and I'm neither of those things."

"Good; I wouldn't want another Libby on the team."

"What's a Libby?" Asked Jimmy.

"It's a slang term for someone who is, typically, Mrs. Rich Daddies Girl who has a clique of popular cronies and outcasts those who don't toe the line. They're also not very bright but they make up for that in underhandedness." Explained Eleanor. "They also fawn over how they look."

"Yep; that describes Nakia." Agreed Jimmy again before looking ahead. "I see another ship part."

Jimmy ran over to a half buried big battery and pulled it out of the ground. He stuffed it in his hat and clapped in satisfaction.

"We're making good progress; we have two parts and the others may have already found more. This is fun." Smiled Jimmy before yelping in fright as a flower blinked at him.

Yes; you read that right; a large marigold like flower blinked at him. A moment past a second later it rose out of the ground and turned out to be another monster. This one had flower eyes, a prickly red mouth, two arms without hands and a bulb shaped body. It had an off switch on its back as well.

"Ok … not cool." Gulped Jimmy. "Run!"

"I'm right behind you!" Yelled Eleanor in agreement as they ran through the woods with the monster hobbling after them. "But you have to admit; this is kind of exciting … and dare I say fun! Woo!

"It depends on what your interpretation of _fun_ is." Replied Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Crunchy Creeping Chrysanthemum!**

**Eleanor: **(Her blond hair is messy and her turtle hat is at an odd angle). **We didn't stop running for fifteen minutes; we turned and saw it was gone but we ran into a hard tree … watch out for that tree!**

**Irene: Why do I get the feeling a tree has just been hurt?**

* * *

"Remind me again why we are trying to find the monsters?" Asked Kasimar as he followed Wallace grumpily through the trees and bushes. "I don't want to get hurt; I could die!"

"Rest assured my loyal lackey; we are in no danger as long as the Hacker Tether is functioning properly." Assured Wallace as he adjusted his sunglasses. "I would think it is obvious why we are looking for a monster; can you guess why?"

"I give up; enlighten me." Said Kasimar with a voice _dripping_ with sarcasm.

"I will use the Hacker Tether to remotely control a strong monster and then wreck complete havoc on our adversaries! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly as usual.

"Why do you laugh so much?" Asked Kasimar. "It grates on my patience a little."

"All evil super villain bad guys need an evil laugh; if not they are simply a mean guy in a suit, but not a bad guy." Explained Wallace. "Now quiet; I smell our prey."

"That might be me." Smirked Kasimar. "Best place to do it is in an enclosed cinema, gets everyone upset."

"True, true." Chuckled Wallace before backing against a tree and peering out from it. "Here it comes."

Out from the overgrowth plodded a very large monster. Its back was like a green shell while its face was large and ugly. It had a _very_ large slimy novelty tongue in its mouth and had short stubby legs. It looked to be an emperor among monsters.

"Charging and … now!" Said Wallace as he fired his Hacker Tether at the lower back of the monster. Instantly it looked as though someone had rammed a pipe where the sun doesn't shine before standing still as a completely still statue.

Kasimar walked out from behind a tree and sized up the robot beast.

"Not bad; think we can break someone's legs with this?" Asked Kasimar darkly.

"Possibly; but we'd have to give them a five second head start in the name of sportsmanship." Shrugged Wallace. "Now; let's see what it can do."

Wallace pressed one of the buttons and the tongue shot out, grabbed Kasimar and went back into the mouth. Kasimar's screams and swearing were audible all around.

"Get me out of here! Oh #bleep# this is soggy!" Wailed Kasimar pathetically.

"Hang on; I'll get you out." Said Wallace as he pressed another button; Kasimar was spat out and crashed into a tree headfirst before collapsing in a heap as stars circled his head.

"Err … are you ok?" asked Wallace gingerly. "It would be bad press for me if my lackey died due to my own inexperience with a remote puppet."

Kasimar groaned and got to his feet before looking up at the sky and screaming several obscenities that would make Elvis Presley blush.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Screamed Kasimar up to the sky.

Because I don't like you.

"I don't like you more you Douche Nozzle!" Snarled Kasimar.

I know you are but what am I?

"Shut up!" Yelled Kasimar to the sky. "You're just jealous of me!"

Jealous? My, my, aren't we an arrogant S.O.B?

"Why you little." Growled Kasimar as he clenched his fists.

"Dude; are you arguing with the narrator?" Asked Wallace in shock and surprise. "You must have hurt your head pretty hard."

"He started it." Mumbled Kasimar.

"Well; breaking the fourth wall will have to wait for later; right now the time is right to cause some trouble, mayhem and pestilence! Mwahahahahaha! C'mon; join in!" Said Wallace with a gesture of his hand.

"Bite me." Snarked Kasimar.

"Fine; but you don't know what you're missing." Said Wallace as he began to make the monster walk in front of them with Kasimar bringing up the rear.

* * *

**Confessional: Painting the fourth wall.**

**Wallace: With that giant fifty foot whatever at our side I felt confident we had secured victory from the jaws of fair play. I have such an interesting life that I could write a book … an evil book! Mwuhahaha!**

**Kasimar: Wallace was useful at first but now I'm having second thoughts … I wonder who else could be a good ally. Hmmmm.**

* * *

"Ok; that's three parts so far." Said Lavender as she, Mable and Raven walked side by side through the forest after finding two more parts. "We're making great progress; all steamwork and bristle fashion."

"What was that last part supposed to mean?" Asked Mable.

"It means we are making good progress." Explained Lavender. "It's a line from Camberwick Green; the series with Windy Miller from the nineteen sixties."

"I remember that." Said Raven as the three walked into a clearing. "My parents have the original tapes; I watched them when I was little."

"Why have a video cassette player when you can have a DVD player?" Asked Mable.

"My parents are a little bit old fashioned." Replied Raven. "That sort of thing is in their nature."

"Classics are good." Agreed Lavender as she absent mindedly snapped her fingers a little. "One of my favorites is Snow White, did you see how determined Grumpy was to get back at the witch? Pure classicness."

"Are you two getting paid to advertise old movies by any chance?" Asked Mable with a giggle.

"I don't think so." Said Lavender as she gazed ahead. "They're just good enough to mention. I feel confident we'll win this challenge."

"Why is that?" Asked Raven. "Overconfidence can be a burden."

"I say that because I see a ship part just ahead." Prompted Lavender as she gestured to the middle of the clearing. "Quick; let's grab it before someone else arrives."

"But it seems suspicious that it is just sitting there … right in the center of a clearing. It could be a trap." Said Mable logically.

"Good point Mable." Agreed Raven quickly as she looked ahead at the part.

"I wouldn't worry; there are no monsters anywhere in site and if they were above us they would be dive bombing us by now wouldn't they?" Said Lavender calmly. "I think we'll be ok."

"Well; if you're sure…" Said Mable as she and Raven followed Lavender towards the part. The footsteps they made sent light vibrations into the ground.

* * *

**Confessional: Walking into a trick or trap!**

**Lavender: looking back on it I should have been more careful … I'm never going to look at snakes and birds the same way again.**

**Raven: **(Her eyes are wide and she looks beyond startled). **What was that thing?**

**Uzuri: One of my favorite monsters from the Pikmin series is the Burrowing Snagrets. Half snake and half seagull, what a combination! They screech, peck and drag Pikmin below ground to the bowels of their beaks! Teehee!**

* * *

Lavender approached the spring and picked it up. Nothing happened.

"That wasn't so hard; guess Chris forgot to put a monster by this one." Smirked Lavender victoriously.

The ground began to rumble.

"I think you spoke too soon." Said Mable. "Oh crap."

At that moment a creature burst out from below the ground and looked down upon the three girls from about twenty feet above them. It had a snake body that was blue but its head resembled that of a seagull of all things.

"Run!" Yelled Mable as she, Lavender and Raven turned tail and sprinted away from the monster.

The monster burrowed back underground and after a few moments popped up in front of Lavender and Mable, it only just missed Raven who continued to run due to being consumed with fear.

* * *

**Confessional: Pulling an Indie.**

**Raven: I shouldn't have run away; does this make me a coward?**

* * *

The bird snake thing-a-magig tried to peck Mable and Lavender; it missed as they ran different ways. It burrowed back underground once more and popped back up next to Lavender; perhaps it had been attracted by the bright red she was wearing … or maybe it didn't like Mable's blue hair.

* * *

**Confessional: You gotta have blue hair!**

**Chris: I was hoping someone would run into the snagret that was created by the most wonderful people in the entire universe; Nintendo rules! If one of them loses a limb or maybe dies I can send it to a blooper show and make even more money! Aren't I smart?**

**Chef: Mama once told me that the love of money is the root of all evil … and looking at Chris I can see my mama was right as usual! Chris must have gone to college because he's taken A level in jerkass!**

* * *

The Snagret popped up beside Lavender and reared back; Lavender jumped just as it pecked and she landed on the top of its beak and held on. She quickly noticed a large switch on its head with the words ON and OFF on it.

"Every beast has an Acules Heel." Said Lavender as she pulled herself onto the beak and leapt for the head.

"What are you doing Lavender?" Asked Mable from a safe distance.

"Switching this abomination off." Replied Lavender as she grabbed the switch and pulled it to the off position.

"Entering pooooweeeeer saaaaviiiing mooooode." Droned the avian robot as it slowly drooped to the floor which allowed Lavender to easily get off.

* * *

**Confessional: Serpent and Avian … Snavian!**

**Mable: What in the history of alternative rock group blues mosh was Chris thinking when he put that thing in the challenge? Has he gone off the deep end?**

**Chris: **(He looks impossibly pissed off). **That stupid girl! She wasn't supposed to shut down the snagret! It was my trump card for drama! Why couldn't she be eaten? **(He begins to cry like a toddler).

* * *

"Well that went pretty well." Said Lavender as she surveyed the motionless robot thingy. "Four parts down and only six to go; we'll be done by dinner time."

"It's great that we keep winning; it means we are getting closer to the prize … but the more we win the longer Kasimar lasts." Lamented Mable.

"True; but he can't weasel his way out of his inevitable downfall." Promised Lavender. "Now let's get out of here … before the monster reactivates."

"Good idea … wait; where did Raven go?" Asked Mable as she looked around.

Lavender glanced around but saw no sign of the former moe. Both she and Mable anime sweat dropped.

"#Bleep#!" Said Lavender and Mable in perfect usion.

* * *

**Confessional: We love our animes!**

**Lavender: I wonder where Raven went … I hope she won't get hurt; she is my team mate and friend after all.**

* * *

Uzuri followed behind Tabitha humming a tune to herself; Tabitha was silent as she walked along in the lead while carrying a ship part they had found. She was frequently glancing left and right as if looking for something.

"Something on your mind Tabitha?" Asked Uzuri in her usual sweet bubbly voice. "Is it a brain leech? Those things are the worst."

"Far from it Uzuri." Replied Tabitha as she stopped and leaned against a tree. "I'm keeping an eye out for monsters; we don't want them to take us by surprise."

"Don't worry about that Tabitha; none of the monsters besides the Smokey Progg and the Waterwraith will take any notice of you if you leave their territory." Reassured Uzuri. "Besides; most of them aren't that hard to beat if you know their weakness."

"And what is the weakness?" Asked Tabitha as they began walking again.

"It varies from monster to monster!" Chirped Uzuri cheerfully as always.

"_Oh I have so much work to do_." Groaned Tabitha in her thoughts. "See any ship parts?"

"Not yet; but aren't these Pikmin hats great? I'm glad I've got a yellow one; it means I have these cute ears." Said Uzuri with a giggle. "I wonder what it's like to get scratched behind the ears by someone."

"Why would you want to know? You're not a cat." Said Tabitha with a raised eyebrow and a look of 'huh'.

"True; but its like sex; its something you _have_ to know." Explained Uzuri with an air of great seriousness.

"I don't see how that makes sense." Said Tabitha with a look of confusion before resuming her usual expression. "Here's something that makes sense … looking for ship parts so that we can win!"

"HMMMM." Said Uzuri with her somewhat comical serious face. "I think … I can see two up there!"

"Where?" Asked Tabitha.

"Up there in that tree." Replied Uzuri as she pointed up to a large tree with a bee hive; the parts were way out of reach for both the short and the tall blond duo.

"Well that isn't so bad; we've just got to get up to them and bring them down, though how exactly to do that without falling or angering the bees is the question." Said Tabitha as she sat on a stump and began to think. "Think Tabitha think."

"Maybe if we found some balloons we could float up there." Suggested Uzuri.

"Where would we get the balloons?" Replied Tabitha without looking up.

STEP …. STEP

"Err; did you hear that?" Asked Tabitha uneasily.

"Here what? The big footsteps or the distant manical laughter?" Asked Uzuri.

"The former; wait, manical laughter? Oh boy; it must be Wallace." Said Tabitha before she looked up and paled.

STEP … STEP … STEP.

"Wow; it's an Emperor Bulblax!" Said Uzuri in awe. "And it looks like the one from the first game."

"How do we beat it?" Whispered Tabitha.

"Feed it explosive bomb rocks." Replied Uzuri. "Though only yellow Pikmin can use them."

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Laughed Wallace as he strode up beside the giant creature with an even bigger tongue with Kasimar following with a look of eagerness on his face. "Looks like Wallace Jr's dinner is ready."

"You're going to make it eat us?" Asked Uzuri with wide eyes.

"Yep! And then I'm going to throw your remains in two trash cans! Mwuhahaha!" Laughed Wallace.

"Wait; why do you need two trash cans? Everyone knows me and Tabitha can't even fit in one." Said Uzuri before giggling at her joke.

* * *

**Confessional: Saying the joke sucked is an understatement.**

**Tabitha: Worst.**

**Wallace: Joke.**

**Kasimar: Ever!**

**Uzuri: That was a pretty good joke I think! Not as good as a professional comedian but it served the purpose of lightening the mood. Teehee!**

* * *

Wallace slapped his forehead at the terrible joke and sighed.

"Get on with it!" Urged Kasimar. "I want to see some pain!"

"Oh no; it's Kasimar! He's a dick!" Cried Uzuri as she noticed Kasimar.

"Stop calling me that! I have feelings you know!" Said Kasimar gruffly.

"And I have a feeling as well … a feeling that I don't like you." Smiled Uzuri. "But how did you two tame an Emperor Bulblax?"

"Thanks to the Hacker Tether; my best evil invention! Mwuhahaha!" Boasted Wallace as he held up the gadget for the girls to see.

"Is it even in the rules that you can do that?" Asked Tabitha doubtfully.

"Who the #bleep# cares?" Asked Kasimar with an unkind smirk.

* * *

**Confessional: Rules were made to be broken.**

**Chris: When I wrote the contracts there was never a rule prohibiting using evil gadgets to hack into and control Pikmin related monsters. Good thing as well … this is gonna be **_**awesome**_**.**

* * *

"Sorry to do this to you ladies … but I love the screams of a damsel in distress!" Smirked Wallace.

Wallace pressed a button on his Hacker Tether's control panel and the Emperor Bulblax Bot reared its face back a little and made "LuhLuhLuh" sorts of sounds.

"Prepare to meet your maker!" cackled Wallace.

"CragmiteBlaster?" Asked Uzuri before Tabitha grabbed her and pulled herself and Uzuri to the floor.

The tongue shot over them and hit the tree hard. A moment later both of the ship parts fell down … immediately followed by the bee hive.

"Oh no." Whimpered Tabitha as her phobia began to act up.

"Oooo crap … initiate cloaking device!" Declared Wallace as he took out a cameo sheet from nowhere and pulled it over himself.

The bees buzzed above their ruined hive and looked upon the three teens they could see. A moment later they began to buzz towards Kasimar.

"No! Get away from me! #bleep#! Ow! #Bleep! Ouch!" Wailed Kasimar as he ran away flailing his arms while the pissed off bees stung him.

"Wait up my lackey!" Called Wallace as he threw off his cameo blanket and switched off his Hacker Tether. "I have some insect spray!"

As Wallace ran off the Emperor Bulblax deactivated and drooped a little; Tabitha and Uzuri got to their feet and the former breathed a sigh of relief.

"I … hate … bees." Said Tabitha in disdain before picking up the two fallen ship parts along with the one she was already holding. "Can you give me hand Uzuri? Wait; what are you doing?"

Tabitha blinked in surprise as Uzuri ripped two honeycombs off the hive and took a bite into one.

"Want some honeycomb? It's crunchy as a bone!" Offered Uzuri generously.

"No thank you." Declined Tabitha with an inward shudder. "I don't like bee related products very much, my dislike of bees stretches to them as well. Could you carry a part?"

"No problem Tabby!" Chirped Uzuri sweetly as Tabitha passed her one of the parts.

"Please don't call me tabby." Requested Tabitha.

"Why not?" Asked Uzuri.

"I am no tabby cat." Replied Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: More like a Tom Cat.**

**Tabitha: My name is Tabitha; not Tabby, Tabitha! **

**Uzuri: I wonder what nickname I could be given. Maybe Uzeyzey? And while I'm in here; Kasimar looked like he was in a lot of pain … is he alright? I really hope something **_**terrible**_** happened to him. Teehee!**

**Kasimar: **(He is covered in bee stings and is visibly shaking). **This is why animal rights people are retards; animals can fight back.**

* * *

Oscar lifted one end of a fallen tree off the ground in search of a part; nothing was underneath so he put the tree back down. He and Xaria had found two parts so far. Oscar felt they weren't doing so badly; if anything they were a pretty good team. It was just a little bit of a drawback that Xaria wasn't really saying anything.

Ever since they had left the rest of the team earlier Xaria had been mostly silent, only occasionally speaking, mostly a simple sentence in response to Oscar where to go next.

Currently Xaria had her hands in her pockets while Oscar held both parts under one of his very muscular arms. She seemed to be deep in thought about something. The silence was making Oscar feel a little uneasy so he decided to strike up a conversation.

"So Xaria; what do you think of this challenge?" Asked Oscar casually. "I've never even played Pikmin so this challenge is kind of odd."

"I think this challenge is like Chris himself; useless and unnecessary." Replied Xaria with a snarky chuckle.

"So you don't like Chris then?" Said Oscar to keep the conversation going.

"Duh; does anyone?" Said Xaria flatly. "He's narcissistic, jerkass and an overall negative dickhead."

"What; no mention that he's going to be the eighty year old virgin one day?" Smirked Oscar.

Xaria chuckled a little and Oscar soon laughed as well.

* * *

**Confessional: I laughed as well!**

**Chris: Xaria and Oscar suck!**

**Oscar: Well; that was a good start, at least I got her to laugh. Looks like we both have a mutual dislike of Chris** **… but who wouldn't dislike him right?**

* * *

"Good one." Said Xaria as she glanced up to a nearby tree. "I can see a part."

"I'll get it." Said Oscar as he walked up to the tree. He reared back and punched the tree. The ship part fell down and he caught it with his free hand. "Could you carry this one?"

"Sure." Shrugged Xaria as she took the part from Oscar and held it under one arm. "Maybe we should take these parts back to camp; the other teams could be on their way back."

"Good thinking; let's go." Concurred Oscar as he and Xaria set off back for camp.

Xaria was once again silent as they walked along; after a while Oscar decided he should ask her what he needed to.

"Say; Xaria, can I ask you something?" Asked Oscar hesitantly.

"Obviously; you just did. You can ask me one other thing though." Said Xaria without looking at Oscar.

"Ok; you know two days ago in the torture challenge we were strapped into those torture chairs right?" Began Oscar.

"Yes; your point?" Said Xaria not knowing where this was leading.

"Well; when Chris made the baseball bats come out I kind of noticed you looked freaked out; not just normal freaked put but _pure_ _terror_." Said Oscar carefully and gingerly. "Wh was that?"

Xaria's eyes widened for a moment but she quickly resumed her normal frowny expression despite inwardly worrying.

"It's nothing; no big deal." Said Xaria with a shake of her head.

"You sure?" Asked Oscar.

"Positive; trust me, don't worry about me. I'm just a negative cynical grump." Said Xaria as she went silent. Oscar looked a little concerned but decided to trust his friend.

Just a minute later they arrived at camp where Chris was waiting and sipping a latté. As they placed the three parts down by the Team Grenade ship Chris walked up with a sly smirk.

"Well you two; you're the first ones back. Good job finding the parts … which is what I would say if I even cared. Take a seat and wait for the others to get back which hopefully won't take too long."

"Wait; hold up. Wait for the others, you mean we can't go back and look for more parts?" Said Oscar angrily. "That's so unfair! You didn't tell us before!"

"You didn't ask." Said Chris with an uninterested sniff. "But it's so obvious; in Pikmin, the game made by the wonderful Nintendo Corporation, which by the way is awesome, at the end of each game day you have to stop looking for parts and leave the planets surface."

"But it isn't night time!" Said Xaria irritably.

"Who cares Bumble Bee!" Smirked Chris. "Just go find a hive and wait."

Xaria's eye twitched and she growled as she sat down on a log and stared at her shoes.

"You know Chris; you may have just gone beyond impossible … you're even _worse_ than Kasimar or perhaps about equal."

Oscar strode past Chris without another word and leaned against his cabin.

* * *

**Confessional: Forget A level; more like took Master Degree in Jerkass.**

**Oscar: I like to think I have patience but lately it is being greatly tested; Chris and Kasimar … awful is an understatement.**

**Xaria: Why do people like poking fun at me so much? Am I being punished her something? Sometimes I wonder…**

* * *

Gary jumped over a log and walked down a slope. It was good to have some quality time with himself after all the craziness of the last eight days; he could also think to himself without anyone disturbing him.

"This is nice; Wawanakwa is a pretty good island when you're alone and away from all the insanity, monsters and man eating sharks." Said Gary out loud as he leaned against a tree. "This Island could make a good vacation spot for naturists, or is it naturalists … whichever one wears cloths, heh."

Gary had already found one part; it was a spring, it had been guarded by three miniature versions of the big bulborb he and the others had encountered earlier. Gary knew he should be looking for more parts but he had something else on his mind.

That something was Raven. When he first met her she stuttered almost every word and rarely spoke. But the Raven of the present time was a mere shadow of her former self; he no longer stuttered, she had proved to be interesting, brave and very friendly. Even in the first challenge when Gary had only just met Raven he had to admit she was a welcome addition to the group.

"_Two problems Gary; first, she is on a different team … and second you've known her for nine days, it's not like she has a crush on you_."

Gary wasn't sure what to think; he thought she was cute, he liked seeing her happy and he felt hot and steamy when someone upset her. Could be _love_ her?

"Get a hold of yourself Gary Stephen Boltok." Said Gary firmly to his inner being. "Focus on the challenge and if you do want to think about love then wait for a suitable moment."

Gary's ears picked up the sound of running and frightened gasps. He turned to the left and felt his heart rate increase a little; Raven was running up and looked really scared. She stopped for breath by a log and panted for a few seconds. After a moment or a few she noticed Gary, her secret crush.

"Hey Gary; how are you?" Asked Raven while shivering a bit.

"I'm fine; but to me it seems the _real_ question is are _you_ ok?" Said Gary as he sat down next to Raven.

"I'm fine, well, not really, I mean, I could be better." Said Raven as she struggled to find suitable words. "I got separated from Lavender and Mable, we were attacked by some sort of burrowing snake and seagull hybrid."

"Err … did I hear right? A snake and seagull hybrid?" repeated Gary in surprise. "This Pikmin series seems a little nuts."

"Hopefully not peanuts; I'm allergic to them." Said Raven with a small chuckle. "Though I agree, it is quite, as you said, nuts."

"I wonder if the monsters will get even more weird." Pondered Gary as he looked up at the trees. "So; have you found any ship parts?"

"No; I was too busy running away." Said Raven while hanging her head in shame. "I must be a coward."

"Don't put yourself down Raven; anyone would be scared of a snake seagull fusion, it's nothing to be ashamed off." Said Gary with a warm smile. "I don't think you're a coward at all, you're much more than that."

"Thanks Gary." Smiled Raven as she turned away to hide her blush.

* * *

**Confessional: Mushy stuff … me likey!**

**Raven: Could Gary … **_**like**_** me … maybe? No; just my overactive imagination, still, a girl has to have dreams.**

* * *

"So … maybe you should head back to camp; you might be able to regroup with your team. It's that way." Said Gary as he pointed back the way he had come. "But then again there could be those robotic monsters around every corner."

"I know; you never know when they could ambush you." Nodded Raven as she looked around as if to spot a monster before it snuck up on her and Gary.

* * *

**Confessional: Snuck a sneak.**

**Chris: It's a good thing I always have special gadgets and back up plans to cause torment so that the campers always suffer; I'm just smart like that. Haha!** (He holds up a remote and cackles).

* * *

As Gary and Raven conversed Chris remotely controlled a small wheeled robot about the size of a bowling ball. It wheeled silently behind the log and at the distant press of a button an air horn emerged from within. A moment later it amplified an extremely loud noise that scared Gary and Raven half to death.

"Whoa!" Yelled Gary as he lost his balance and fell to the floor on his back.

Raven jumped about seven feet in the air in fright and then fell down … on Gary. It just so happened by a fluke of a coincidence and maybe a little help from Cupid that when she fell on Gary their lips touched.

For a few seconds they both lay there in shock and after fright before realizing what was happening; Raven scrambled off and sat back down on the log blushing supernova like. Gary got up while feeling lighter than air and shakily sat down.

The two were quiet for a moment before Raven opened her mouth to speak.

"Gary; I am _**SO**_ sorry! I didn't mean to do that, it may have been an accident but it was just … wrong." Apologized Raven at a mile a minute. "Please forgive me, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!"

Gary chuckled and when he raised his head Raven was surprised not only to see that he was smiling but also he was blushing just like Raven.

"Don't be sorry Raven; it was an accident, not only that but … err … well … I kinda enjoyed it." Blushed Gary.

"Really?" Asked Raven with a air of extreme relief.

"Well; yes. You see, erm, I kinda…" Gary stopped and trailed off. Raven thought and the gears in her brain seemed to click.

"Gary … do you _like_ me?" Asked Raven with wide surprised eyes.

"…There's no point in lying or hiding the truth." Sighed Gary before nodding and smiling at Raven. "Raven … I think I'm in love with you."

Gary waited for the rejection; they simply hadn't known each other long enough, but it never came. On the contrary Raven was beaming.

"It's funny you should say that Gary, because I … like you too." Said Raven while inwardly feeling aflame with embarrassment.

Gary was silent, so was Raven, it was as if the existence off sound had packed its bags, called a taxi and gone on holiday to Alaska.

"Isn't this funny." Chuckled Gary. "We both liked each other and thought the other didn't return the feelings. And … this setup seems to be just … perfect. Fate must have played a helping hand."

"You know; I've never been in a relationship before." Said Raven a little shyly. "You're my very first boyfriend."

"So does this mean we're together?" Asked Gary while losing the feeling in his legs.

"Yes; it does … if you want." Blushed Raven.

The two teens stared at each other for a second or two before leaning in to share a sweet and tender kiss.

* * *

**Confessional: Achievement unlocked! One couple formed!**

**Chris: **(Fuming and pouting). **Drat! That backfired! Humph!**

**Gary: I feel as light as a feather and as warm as a boiling kettle. I think this is becoming the best day of my life. I feel … complete.**

**Raven: I've never tried the whole "dating game" before but I feel comfortable with this; maybe we could be in the final two together.**

* * *

Irene stopped walking suddenly; she and Vinnie had been taking two parts back to camp but she had a sudden feeling of something.

"Bee in your bonnet Irene?" Asked Vinnie as he noticed Irene had stopped. Irene began walking again and smiled.

"Call me crazy but the trees are telling me that something wonderful has happened." Said Irene with a happy and cutesy sigh.

"Could you ask the trees to show us where another part is?" Asked Vinnie politely. "I'm sure they'd help you as you are their friend."

"Oh silly Vinnie! You don't ask trees just anything." Giggled Irene. "They only listen at certain times; the mind of a tree is fairly complicated.

"Err … ok, I'll take your word for it." Said Vinnie in mild confusion. As he scratched the side of his head.

* * *

**Confessional: Trees have feelings, DON'T CUT THEM DOWN!**

**Irene: Redwoods are very interesting for conversation … but thistles are little potty mouths; they should have their roots washed out with soap! **(Irene giggles happily).

**Vinnie: I didn't really understand what Irene meant; but maybe it's better that way.**

* * *

"I'm guessing you like this challenge then Irene." Said Vinnie. "With all this nature it should be right up your street."

"Ding! You are absolutely correct Vinnie." Said Irene while imitating a quiz show host. "I am enjoying this challenge; especially the monster we past a while back that looked like a flower."

"I would have thought you'd be enjoying wearing the Pikmin hats; they have a flower on them." Said Vinnie as they strolled into camp.

"I like that as well." Nodded Irene. "This is a really good challenge; let's get these parts in place quick so we can go back into the forest."

"Actually you will be doing no such thing." Chuckled Chris sadistically as the two campers put their pair of parts by the Team Jungle rocket. "Once you enter camp you may not leave again; that's a rule."

"But you didn't say that earlier." Protested Irene.

"I know; that's because you didn't ask and also I just didn't feel like telling you." Laughed Chris snidely. "Just sit around here with Oscar and Xaria until the challenge ends, it's not like you two rejects have anything important to do."

"You're a jerk Chris." Said Vinnie as he attempted to stand up to Chris. "Why do you torment us so?"

"Because it's funny!" Laughed Chris while looking at his watch. "I hope this challenge ends soon; I want to set fire to a few trees."

Irene shrieked in anger and stomped on Chris's foot _**HARD**_.

"My fooooot! Mooooommy!" Wailed Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: You go girl!**

**Irene: Nobody hurts trees! Nobody! **(Irene hisses like a snake).

**Oscar: About time someone put that dickhead in his place. Yeah! Go Irene!**

**Chris: That was so cruel! I'm telling! **(Chris begins to cry).

* * *

Quana had learned something about herself … she hated frogs! It turned out that charging at the frog robot wasn't the best idea; it had nearly crushed Spider and covered her in dirt and mud. Oh what she would do for a nice hot shower. At least Barney had come out of the whole thing unscathed and they had got two more ship parts; one from the frog thing and one from inside a hollow tree trunk.

"Boy I could use a shower." Groaned Quana. "I'm so dirty!"

"Well I can see a stream just over there sea lass." Said Barney with a sudden sly grin. "If you want we could turn our backs while you bathe in there mermaid."

Quana's eyes widened and she went red in embarrassment.

"I'll have to politely decline your suggestion." Said Quana awkwardly. "And there are cameras everywhere; I don't want any of them catching me naked!"

"Fair enough; I guess when we get back to camp you could have a shower, yaaaar." Shrugged Barney. "Ok; we've got four parts; that means we are forty percent along the road to victory."

"We're certainly making *cough* good progress." Sniffled Spider sickly. "Maybe we should head *cough* back to camp and deposit these parts so *sneeze* we won't lose them or have them stolen."

"Good idea Spider; maybe we should head back to camp." Said Quana in agreement.

"Methinks that's a good idea." Nodded Barney rapidly so his wild long hair flopped around. "Let us return to the pirate grotto from whence we began me hearties! And then we ca … ooh look, a ship part!"

Barney pointed to a pair of batteries sitting on the grass nearby; a few signs with various warning and danger pictures were around them.

"Well this shouldn't be a problem." Said Barney with a clap of his hands as he began to walk up to the batteries.

"Barney; I don't think that is *cough* such a good idea." Warned Spider.

"Spider is right; aren't those signs a giveaway?" Asked Quana as she took a few steps back.

Barney picked up the batteries and strode back unharmed; he tossed up the two batteries, took a bow and caught the ship parts as they fell back down.

"Nothing to it." Shrugged Barney.

"But how did you *cough* know that nothing would happen?" Asked Spider in amazement.

"Because Chris put the danger signs there to lull us into thinking that there would be danger and thus we wouldn't take it and therefore we would lose. It's simple psychology; reverse psychology specifically."

Spider and Quana looked at Barney in pure awe; he'd had another smart moment again.

"Last one back to camp is a circular square!" Laughed Barney as he ran off back towards camp.

Spider and Quana glanced at each other for a moment.

"I seriously think Barney is much smarter than he lets on." Commented Quana.

"I know what you mean; he's quite *sneeze* oddball and a little strange yet *cough* he's excelling at everything." Agreed Spider as he and Quana ran off after Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: Acceleration is important in a car!**

**Spider: I think Barney stands the ***cough* **best chance of winning this whole thing; at least ***sneeze* **for now. I won't vote for him though what about ***sniffle* **the other teams after the merge? If we lose ***cough* **this challenge I don't know who I'll vote ***cough* **for.**

**Quana: I'm wondering how smart Barney really is; is he hiding something?**

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor had outrun the plant monster a while ago; they had caught their breath and had found two more parts; one had been in a tall tree and the other had been next to a sleeping monster that they had thankfully not woken up. The two kids were on their way back to camp; they hadn't run into anyone else since their team had split up earlier.

"Four parts out of ten is pretty good." Said Eleanor contently. "We just have to get these back to camp and look for some more; and that's not counting the amount of parts the others have possibly found."

"You're right; we have a good shot at winning this." Smiled Jimmy with his hat over his shoulder containing the four parts they had found. "Voting someone off would be hard as I'm good friends with everyone on our team."

"There's a chance that eventually the only people left in the contest will be the nicest." Lamented Eleanor. "I bet someone would have to decide by a coin toss."

"It's amazing how much importance a single cent can have on fate sometimes." Said Jimmy as he and Eleanor walked into camp. "Well it looks like we're here. Hmmm; seems that Barney, Quana and Spider haven't got back with any parts here yet."

Jimmy gestured to the Team Puzzle rocket that had no parts by it. Jimmy sped over and emptied the parts out of his hat into a pile in front of the rocket.

"Right then; lets get back out there and find more." Said Jimmy.

"Don't get your hopes up Jimmy." Grumbled Xaria from a nearby log.

"What do you mean?" Asked Jimmy.

"And why are you here? Shouldn't you be looking for parts?"

"I can answer those questions." Said Chris as he walked up from behind the rocket models. "Once you bring any parts you have found back to your ship you can't go and look for more. Xaria, along with Oscar, Vinnie and Irene, are her because they have already arrived back with parts."

"But you didn't tell us that rule earlier; you've just waited for a moment when it would most anger us … that's not fair." Said Jimmy with crossed arms.

"Too bad short shit; life isn't Haha!" Laughed Chris before being kicked in the balls by Eleanor. "Eeeeeeeeeeeek!"

"Don't swear in front of Jimmy; what kind of an example are you setting for the next generation?" Snapped Eleanor.

"Boy it sure sucks to be Chris huh?" Said Xaria with a small smile.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd swear but censors won't let me.**

**Eleanor: I can understand other contestants swearing; they either have a god reason or they're idiots, like Kasimar, but Chris is like what, twenty six, and he swore at Jimmy for a cheap laugh completely unprovoked. What kind of a mother raised him?**

**Chris: **(He is holding an ice pack to his crotch). **Shup up!**

* * *

A moment later Kasimar and Wallace strode into camp holding two parts; more accurately Wallace was holding the parts and Kasimar looked like he was in immense pain due to all the bee stings.

"Oh no; it's Kasimar!" Said Vinnie from his seat by his cabin.

"He's a dick!" Said Irene with a giggle.

"Not one word or I'll rip out your spleens!" Growled Kasimar as Wallace put the two parts down by the team Grenade rocket which bought their total up to five. "Chris; there had _**BETTER**_ be some lotion for these stings."

"I think Chef might have some." Said Chris with a shrug.

"Good; at the moment I feel like a voodoo pin cushion."

As Kasimar left for the medical tent he passed Irene and Vinnie; Irene couldn't resist saying something.

"Buzz, buzz, buzz!" Smirked Irene.

"Shut up you stupid tree humping _girl_!" Snarled Kasimar as he walked out of sight.

"Forget bee; more like a wasp." Said Irene in disdain.

* * *

**Confessional: Buzzing you around!**

**Kasimar: Maybe I could set the forest on fire to upset that tree hugger; her screams and tears as she futilely tries to save her wooden friends would be priceless and a good video for YouTube. Yahaha!**

* * *

Lavender and Mable had been looking for Raven for a while but hadn't had any luck in finding her. Hopefully she was ok (and unbeknownst to them she was!). The cheerleader and blue haired girl had got four parts and had decided to go back to camp; after they had dropped off the parts they would have their hands free.

"I hope Raven is ok; the forest isn't very safe today." Said Mable.

"Monsters can generally make any place unsafe." Replied Lavender. "I know we're supposed to suffer a little but Chris is taking it to a completely insane level."

"Maybe he was dropped on his head as a baby … an ugly baby." Suggested Mable with a giggle.

* * *

**Confessional: Ugly bugley!**

**Lavender: That seems quite likely.**

**Chris: Shut up! I was a very handsome baby! I was so drop dead gorgeously handsome they put my face on the packaging of diapers! **

* * *

"Forget dropped on his head; he was probably born to two escaped asylum patients." Said Lavender.

"He could be a relative of Jack the Ripper." Said Mable.

"But who was Jack the Ripper? Nobody knows." Said Lavender in deep thought.

"I do; he was the queen's doctor; I just have a feeling that he was." Said Mable promptly.

"If you're sure." Said Lavender to politely humor her friend.

"So how are you holding up as team leader?" Asked Mable. "Besides Winkus and Dinkus we all think you're doing very well."

"Thanks Mable; I think I'm doing ok … though Kasimar's prejudice and unnatural hatred of redheads angers me a little. It's just so pathetic." Said Lavender as she frowned at the thought of the blue mohawked bully.

"Don't worry; unless something really big happens with someone else I'm voting Kasimar next time we lose. The look on his face as he loses all hope for the million; it'll be great! Maybe I could video his elimination and put it on the internet." Said Mable with a sly grin and rubbing her hands together.

"Great idea." Said Lavender with a smirk as well. "I'd watch it over and over."

"Good thing I bought a video camera with me; making movies is one of my hobbies, I like doing stop motion with characters made from fruit and vegetables."

"That sounds pretty good; stop motion is always fun."

* * *

**Confessional: If you stop making motion you'll be at a stand still!**

**Mable: While it didn't have fruit in it the inspiration for my stop motion hobby was Pingu; I used to watch it a lot when I was a little girl. That was before I died my hair blue and orange, back then it was silky shiny black.**

* * *

Lavender and Mable arrived in camp and saw five parts by their ship already; with their current four that would bring the total to nine so they would only have to find but a single part to win.

"Here's to an almost certain victory." Said Lavender happily as she put her two parts down in the pile.

"First place here we come." Said Mable as she put down her two parts. "Now let's go and get one more quickly."

They hadn't taken three steps when Chris ran in front of them to stop them.

"Where do you two think you're going?" Asked Chris with a sudden sadistic smirk.

"We're going to get our last part; or at least we were until you blocked our path." Replied Lavender with crossed arms.

"Oh you naïve fool!" Laughed Chris with a smirk. "I've told the others this already; once you arrive you can't go back and look for more parts! Haha!"

"You didn't say that earlier!" Said Lavender in anger.

"Didn't I Lavender? Didn't I?" Asked Chris with a chuckle.

"No! You didn't!" Snapped Lavender.

"Maybe I should have told you earlier." Pondered Chris before laughing. "But where would be the fun in that? Haha!"

"You're a nasty horrible unfair man!" Growled Lavender as she walked over and sat next to Xaria.

"What rattled her cage?" Asked Chris with another chuckle. "She must be on her period or something."

"I find that sexist!" Snarled Mable.

"Ah who cares?" Laughed Chris. His laughter promptly stopped when a strong black fist met his face.

* * *

**Confessional: He had it coming.**

**Chris: My poor perfect nose! Boohoo! **(He starts crying like a little baby).

**Mable: Well; that was **_**very**_** satisfying. **

* * *

"Well; what do we do now?" Asked Mable as she sat next to Lavender.

"We pray that Raven has found a part and is on her way back." Replied Lavender.

"Yaaaaar! Time for this wining ship to set sail!" Cheered Barney as he ran into camp with three ship parts. He juggled them for a moment before placing them in the pile by the Team Puzzle rocket.

Quana and spider came next; with two and one parts respectively. They put them down next to the Team puzzle rocket and the lights on the ship glowed and flashed.

"Congratulations Team Puzzle!" Said Chris as he walked up to the winning team. "You are the first team to get ten parts so you have come first in today's challenge."

"YES! Yohohoho!" Cheered Barney as he took a bow. "Come here you two!"

Barney grabbed Quana and Spider into a tight hug; Spider blushed extremely red, not because Quana was in the hug as well but because it was tight that Quana's mid sized chest was pressing firmly against him.

* * *

**Confessional: Woooooooooooot!**

**Spider: **(He is staring into space with his mouth agape before looking up to the sky). **Thank you God!**

**Barney: **(He says nothing; he just laughs and winks to the camera).

**Eleanor: Hooray! We won! I get to stay here another day and so do my best friends; I wonder which of the other teams will lose … I guess I'll wait and see!**

* * *

Tabitha and Uzuri were still walking around the forest and now had their arms full; they had found four parts; Tabitha felt confident that they would at least secure second place; if Team Puzzle lost then they would no longer have the fewest team members. As she wasn't at camp Tabitha didn't know that Team Puzzle had already won.

"So Uzuri; which way is camp?" Asked Tabitha.

"HMMMMM." Said Uzuri with her comical serious face once more. "I have an idea; see the stream over there? Water always runs to the sea and there is a stream near camp; if we follow it we might find camp."

"Not a bad plan." Said Tabitha. "I guess we'll be following the stream for a while."

Tabitha and her Sweet Sadist sidekick began to follow the stream; Tabitha had been hoping for a chance to listen to the relaxing stream but alas that didn't seem to be a possibility. Uzuri had started on her second honeycomb and was crunching it loudly, she was polite enough to eat with her mouth closed but the crunchy sounds were driving Tabitha up the wall!

* * *

**Confessional: Kellogs Crunchy Crunch!**

**Tabitha: It took her five while minutes to finish that honeycomb … that means three hundred seconds of annoying crunchiness! Grrrr!**

* * *

After five minutes the crunching stopped as Uzuri gulped the last of the honey comb and licked some stray honey off her finger tips.

"Finally." Mumbled Tabitha.

"Did you say something Tabitha?" Asked Uzuri.

"It's nothing really; it is just that the crunchy sounds were starting to get slightly irritating." Explained Tabitha while resisting the very inviting urge of strangling Uzuri.

"Oopsie! Sorry about that BFF." Smiled Uzuri sweetly. "Now that I'm done with the delicious honeycomb I can hear the stream; isn't the sound of rushing water relaxing? I wonder how many pirates and vagabonds drowned and sank to their watery graves in there."

Tabitha felt a little freaked out but she didn't show it.

"I don't think any did; I'm pretty sure this Island was uninhabited before the Total Drama series began. Besides; there are no shipwrecks so no pirates have been here."

"Good point Tabitha." Smiled Uzuri before getting off track again. "I wonder if Vinnie likes honeycombs."

"Why would you ask that?" Asked Tabitha.

"I don't know; I just thought eating honey combs while watching a blood red and rust orange sunset would be fun! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

"Remember what I said earlier?" Asked Tabitha. "You can focus on your love life between challenges. In the mean time we have to make sure we don't lose."

"I don't think we will because I can see camp." Said Uzuri as she pointed to the campgrounds a short distanced away. "Lets go!"

Uzuri ran off as fast as her legs could carry her; Tabitha quickly caught up due to being taller and having longer legs. They entered camp and ran up to their teams rocket and put the four parts in a pile. This bought the team Jungle total up to six.

"Looks like we still need four; that shouldn't be so hard." Said Tabitha. "Let's go and get more quickly."

"No you will not." Said Chris as he walked up with a bandage around his nose. "Once you enter camp with your parts you cannot leave again; you should have seen how angry some of the others were, it was pretty funny! Haha!"

"Wait; we can't go back out?" Asked Tabitha before scowling. "That isn't fair; you didn't tell us that rule earlier, if you had we wouldn't have come back yet."

"Sorry … not!" Laughed Chris.

"You … monster!" Snarled Tabitha.

"Oh shut up you; what are you gonna do about it? You may be one of my favorites but don't expect any special treatment, now go and sit somewhere and wait."

"You mean naughty man." Said Uzuri while waggling her index finger.

"What are you gonna do about it Creepy Freaky?" Asked Chris dryly.

"Don't call my friend a freak Chris!" Growled Vinnie as he walked up.

"Don't worry Vinnie; I can handle this." Said Uzuri before smiling sweetly at Chris. "Chris; your birth was such an accident that your birth certificate was an apology from the condom factory! Teehee!"

Chris gasped and stood rooted to the spot. Everyone was silent.

"Oh dear." Mumbled Eleanor.

"Waaaaah! Boo hoo!" Blubbered Chris as he simply dropped to the ground and cried.

"Maybe I was too hard on him." Said Uzuri in guilt.

"Don't worry Uzuri; he had it coming, and it was so funny." Laughed Vinnie as he high fived Uzuri. All Uzuri could do was giggle and smile modestly.

* * *

**Confessional: I apologize for nothing! Go Uzuri!**

**Uzuri: I don't know what came over me; I just don't like it when mean bad naught people upset my friends.**

**Tabitha: Uzuri; she may be a freak, an abomination and really insane but I have to compliment her on her choice of insults. Looks like even freaks can be funny.**

**Chris: **(His eyes are puffy and red from crying). **Uzuri sucks!**

* * *

Gary and Raven walked through the woods back to camp; they were holding a ship part each with one hand and holding hands with the other. They had spent the last hour just sitting next to each other on the log and talking to each other; it turned out they had quite a few things in common; they both liked cooking, they both were fans of Harry Potter, both liked American sitcoms and they also both slept with a night light. They had just forgotten the challenge so they could get to know each other more; but seeing the time of day because of the sky they had got up and set off back to camp, on the way Raven had found a part.

"This is nice; a walk through the evening woods by ourselves." Smiled Gary to his girlfriend.

"Yeah; it's very romantic." Agreed Raven.

"Speaking of romantic; what is it that attracts you to me?" Asked Gary curiously.

"Well; you're smart, you're handsome, you stick up for your friends and stand up to bullies, you can cook amazingly and, well, you just have a great personality."

"That's nice to know." Blushed Gary.

"But what will our teams think of us dating?" Asked Raven in sudden worry.

Gary thought for a moment and nodded.

"I have an idea; we don't have to tell anyone, at least not until like the merge or until Wallace and Kasimar are gone which shouldn't take too long." Said Gary. "I was hoping to tell Vinnie; he already knew I liked you, and … can you keep a secret?"

"Sure; I'm great at that." Nodded Raven.

"Well; Vinnie has a big crush on Uzuri." Chuckled Gary.

"Isn't Uzuri the blond girl who says scary things and likes creepy stuff?" Asked Raven. That's … actually kind of sweet."

"I think so as well." Agreed Gary. "Hopefully neither of us will be voted off tonight; that … would just be so cruel of fate."

"Looks like camp is up ahead; I can see some lights through the trees up ahead." Said raven quietly.

"Ok; I have an idea. Let's pretend we're trying to get to camp before each other; we won't talk to each other, we'll just run. I think the others will buy it … I hope so anyway."

"Good idea." Smiled Raven. "You're full of them, another reason I like you."

Raven leaned in and gave Gary a peck on the cheek.

"Whoa." Mumbled Gary happily. "Now let's go."

* * *

**Confessional: How come I never get kissed? I may have no mouth but still!**

**Gary: Whether I win or lose … I've had a great time. Even if my team does lose I think they just might keep me around for my catering talent.**

**Raven: It feels really good to not be so shy anymore; I feel like a new person! I feel as free as a bird! Yahee!**

* * *

"Ok; when are the stragglers going to get here?" Asked Chris impatiently. He had stopped crying a minute or two ago and was looking at his watch and tapping his foot. "Who is left anyway?"

"Gary and Raven." Said Jimmy from his seat as he yawned. "Sitting here doing nothing is so **boring**!"

"I hope Gary found a few parts." Said Tabitha anxiously. "I don't want to have to go to a Bonfire Ceremony again."

"Wait! I see them!" Said Oscar. "Looks like this'll be close."

Gary and Raven were running into camp; Gary was about a meter in the lead and was pulling ahead. Raven was running behind.

"Go Gary!" Cheered Uzuri in an attempt to cheer Gary on so he would run faster.

Gary ran up to the Team Jungle rocket and placed a part in the pile and panted for breath.

"_Oh no_." Thought Tabitha in worry. "_If Gary has only one part and Raven has one then that means…_"

Raven put her part in the pile by the Team Grenade rocket. Instantly the rocket lit up and flashed.

"Finally!" Said Chris loudly in relief. "This has been … a bit of a boring challenge. But that is overshadowed by the fact that Nintendo merchandise was involved because they are awesome, humble, wonderful, kind and generous. Everyone should love them!"

"Quit ass kissing." Said Xaria grumpily.

"Fine!" Snapped Chris. "To give a quick rundown Team Puzzle have finished in first place and as such not only avoid elimination but also get a special prize. Today's prize is …

…

…

…

…

…

…

A copy of both Pikmin games for the GameCube and a Pikmin beanie each!"

"But I don't have *cough* a GameCube." Said Spider with a sneeze.

"Too bad." Smirked Chris. "That's your prize whether you like it or not. Haha!"

"You're a dick yaaaar." Said Barney with a disapproving shake of his head.

"Shut up." Snapped Chris. "In second place; therefore also avoiding elimination but not earning a prize … is Team Grenade!"

The members of Team Grenade smiled a little; except Kasimar as he was still in pain from the bee stings.

"Get on with it douche nozzle!" Jeered Kasimar.

"Fine; whatever!" Sighed Chris. "In last place once again and therefore having to vote someone off tonight is Team Jungle; I will see you guys in one hour at the Bonfire Ceremony after which only four of you will be left. In the meantime I'm going to get a massage."

Chris left to his luxury trailer as the campers began to disperse. Tabitha stood still and thought to herself.

"_I have a plan_." She thought to herself craftily.

* * *

**Confessional: I plan to be here all season.**

**Tabitha: We lost **_**again**_**. What is wrong with this team? Urgh! Well; it won't be me going home tonight, I think I know who offers the least to this team … and I know how to get rid of them, looks like its time to collect on a favor. **

**Lavender: Second place isn't so bad; the prize didn't look very good this time so it's no biggie. As long as we don't finish last its ok even if booting off Kasimar would make my day.**

* * *

Vinnie was sitting alone in the mess hall; dinner had finished a while ago and everyone else had left to turn in for the night. He just had to wait about half an hour until the Bonfire Ceremony began; hopefully he wouldn't be the one going home.

"I wonder who I should vote for." Pondered Vinnie to himself as he sipped some water from his cup with his organic arm.

"Good evening Vinnie." Waved Tabitha as she walked over and saw down across from him.

"Hi Tabitha; how are you?" Asked Vinnie politely.

"I'm fine; though I would be feeling better if we hadn't lost." Replied Tabitha with a fake sigh. "Looks like only four of us will be left after tonight."

"I'm sure you'll be safe." Said Vinnie supportively. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"Thanks … so; out of idle curiosity who are you voting for if you've decided yet." Asked Tabitha.

"I haven't decided yet." Said Vinnie after another sip of water.

"You'd better hurry up; in less than half an hour the ceremony will start." Said Tabitha. "I just have something I think you might want to here."

"Ok; what is it Tabitha?" Asked Vinnie fully attentively to Tabitha.

"One of our team mates is going to vote for you." Said Tabitha which wasn't a complete lie as the camper had been thinking of voting for Vinnie. "Also; they were … calling Uzuri a freak behind her back."

"What?" Asked Vinnie with sudden anger.

"I know." Nodded Tabitha with fake anger. "It's not nice; I know you and Uzuri are good friends and I've noticed you don't like Uzuri being called a freak … so I thought I'd tell you."

"Who was it?" Asked Vinnie while trying to be calm.

Tabitha looked around to make sure nobody else was listening and whispered the name into Vinnie's ear. Vinnie's eyes narrowed and he nodded.

"I see." Said Vinnie before going silent.

"Also; I'd like to ask a favor of you if that's alright." Said Tabitha while pretending to be hesitant.

"Sure; you helped clear my name a few days ago, what do you need?" Asked Vinnie.

"I'd like you to vote for someone … the same person who called Uzuri a freak." Said Tabitha quietly.

Vinnie nodded and got up.

"I'm there Tabitha; they're going down." Said Vinnie. "I'll see you later; I'm going to cast my vote."

Vinnie ran out of the mess hall, probably to cast his vote while Tabitha smiled to herself.

"_Freaks are so easy to manipulate_." Thought Tabitha with a chuckle.

* * *

**Confessional: Time fro someone to get the fudge out!**

**Gary: I can't vote for Uzuri as Vinnie likes her, I won't vote for Vinnie and I don't really mind Irene, she's really nice and funny. That leaves only Tabitha. Sorry Tabitha, nothing personal.**

**Vinnie: I don't like people being treated badly because of differences; I've experienced that all too much in the past. Owing to that I choose to vote for **(static cuts him off).

**Irene: Sadly its between Vinnie and Gary; who should I vote for. Err. **(She takes out a cent). **Heads I vote for Vinnie, Tails I vote for Gary. **(Irene flips the coin and catches it. She glances at it and nods). **Looks like I'm voting for Vinnie.**

* * *

Night had rolled around on day nine of Total Drama Letterz. The sun had set, the moon was out and the stars were twinkling high above. It was dark and had the perfect atmosphere for a Bonfire Ceremony.

The five remaining members of Team Jungle sat on stumps and logs around the fire. Gary and Irene sat on stumps while Tabitha, Uzuri and Vinnie shared a log. The fire crackled with sparks; it warmed up the campers considerably. Chris arrived a minute later with a tray of four, count em four, marshmallows. He set down the tray on the oil barrel and leaned on it as he smirked at Team Jungle.

"You guys really suck at this game you know." Taunted Chris with a chuckle. "This is the fourth time you've been here. Now you've gone and lost half of your team. Seriously; you guys are the losers, not winners such as me."

Uzuri pouted, Tabitha and Vinnie glared at Chris, Irene just looked up at the sky while Gary just smiled to himself about his good day.

"Stop jack-assing around and get on with it." Said Tabitha. "It's a cold night and we want to go to bed!"

Chris pouted and picked up a marshmallow.

"When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow, that means that you are safe. The camper who does _not_ receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means you are out … and you can't come back … *ever*."

Some campers looked confident and other looked nervous.

"… … Uzuri."

"Alrighty!" Smiled Uzuri as she got up from sitting between Tabitha and Vinnie and claimed her marshmallow. She impaled it on her finger, put her finger on her mouth and ate the marshmallow.

"Gary".

"Tabitha".

One marshmallow was left on the tray. Chris held it up for Irene and Vinnie to see.

"This is the final marshmallow of the evening. If you do not get it then you are out and must walk the dock of shame, board the boat of losers and *never* come back. The final marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Vinnie."

Vinnie nodded and pumped a fist in content as he walked up and claimed his marshmallow. Irene slumped in her seat and sighed.

"Well nature girl; looks like the power of trees wasn't with you tonight … now get the heck off this island." Smirked Chris as he tossed the empty tray to Irene's feet.

Irene sighed in disappointment and got to her feet.

"Well; I lasted nine days." Said Irene in an attempt to cheer herself up. "Goodbye everyone; I'll be cheering for you."

"Goodbye Irene; have fun at the playa." Smiled Gary.

Irene waved a farewell and walked to the dock of shame; she walked it and boarded the boat of losers which sped off into the dark night.

"Well you four; you are safe … this time." Said Chris before laughing. "But I bet I'll be seeing you here again pretty soon! Haha!"

The four remaining members of Team Jungle frowned at Chris and left for bed. Once more they were at a disadvantage, how much longer could they survive?

Chris turned to the cameraman and flashed his pearly whites.

"And that ends it." Said Chris with a clap. "Irene is now gone and Team Jungle has only got four members left. Who will be voted of next? Will anyone find out about the new secret couple? And what cheating has Wallace got planed for the next challenge? Find out next time on total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Gary: Tabitha

Irene: Vinnie (by coin flip)

Tabitha: Irene

Uzuri: Irene

Vinnie: Irene

With Irene gone ten campers overall have walked the dock of shame; a shame she left, I liked her, but it had to be done. Sixteen remain. Who will go next? I know … but do you?

Next time: This challenge is right up Gary's street.


	21. Day 10, Part 1, Smoke me a Kipper

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or "The Season That Must Never Be Named". They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please; don't steal them.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains bullying, a hard wooden plank smack, underwear related conversation, a super sadistic host, two villains colliding and farting over the intercom. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven** VinniexUzuri and a secret couple that is getting more hinted at. From now on all couples listed in **bold** are ones that have already hooked up.

**Poll: **The poll is still up and you can still vote on it. So far Gary, Jimmy, Raven and spider are leading with two votes each. Barney, Lavender, Tabitha and Uzuri are joint second with one vote each. The rest have no votes. When the next chapter is released the poll will be taken down so vote while you can!

**Review Answers**

**Bad-asp:** That's an interesting and funny way of putting Kasimar and Wallace's luck; they've only lasted as long as they have because they are on a strong team. But their luck can't last forever…

Lets get this show on the road!

* * *

Day ten had begun on Wawanakwa Island; the birds were out and the many poisonous flowers were opening in the morning sunlight. Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame as per every episode to give the recap. He lacked the Nintendo hat for some reason.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The magnificent me secured a sponsorship from Nintendo! It was wonderful that those fantastic people wanted to sponsor this humble show … but sadly they didn't like the episode because of all the scheming and unfairness so unfortunately the sponsorship bounced. Damn! But if you Nintendo heads are watching this I'm open for renewing the deal."

Chris made a "puppy dog face" and trembled his lip before resuming his normal face and continuing the recap.

"The challenge was dangerous yet fairly simple; the three teams were made to wear ridiculous hats and collect spaceship parts for their team' rocket, ala Pikmin. It was a pretty good challenge at first but sadly it ended up sucking; why you may ask, well I'll get to that shortly."

"The teams all split themselves up so they could cover more ground and get the job done faster. During the split up we had some funny dialogue fro Kasimar; he trash talked gingers again and upset people. Maybe he'll upset Lavender so much she'll kill herself and go to hell … you know, because she has red hair and fire is red! Haha."

"The teams found themselves getting attacked by monster before long. From things quite mundane like Red Bulborbs to monstrosities such as Burrowing Snagrets and Creeping Chrysanthemums … boy, that sure is a mouthful! Much to my surprise Uzuri, our local freak, has a very large knowledge on Pikmin; apparently she plays it when real life gets her down. Well; it didn't do her much good! Haha!"

"While the monsters played a big part in this challenge; the _real_ action went on with The Chef and the former moe, by which I mean Gary and Raven. Those two had sickeningly fallen for each other yet didn't know the other felt the same way. After Raven got separated from her group thanks to a Burrowing Snagret she ended up coming across Gary after a cowardly retreat. The two bonded a little and I was determined to ruin this moment. Haha!"

Chris laughed but then frowned angrily.

"Unfortunately my air horn Remote Controlled Robot, while scaring them, left them in a 'compromising situation' on the ground. One thing led to another and they became boyfriend and girlfriend. Sheesh! Some people have no taste; love makes me sick!"

Chris gagged and imitated being sick.

"The challenge took a long time; though it was amusing to see the looks on the camper's faces when I revealed a hidden rule. Once you come back to camp you can't go and look for more parts. Very funny. But in the end Team Puzzle took first place and the prize and Team Grenade avoided elimination yet again and finished in second. That meant it was Team Jungle who finished in last and therefore had to vote someone off."

"Tabitha was back to her old tricks and was set on sealing a certain camper's fate. She already had Uzuri's vote but then collected on a favor from Vinnie. She lied that Irene had called Uzuri a freak; this angered Vinnie as believe it or not he has a thing for Uzuri who feels likewise. Well; an eye for an eye, a freak for a freak or something like that. Vinnie was successfully manipulated."

"The Bonfire Ceremony arrived and with a three votes in favor of her leaving it was tree hugging nature girl Irene who took the fall and the shame of being the tenth person voted off the Island. That leaves only four people on Team Jungle, if I'd known they were going to suck this much I'd have renamed their team as The Screaming Pansies."

Chris threw up his arms grandly and smiled to the camera.

"Who will be voted off this time? How long and Gary and Raven keep their love secret? Is Spider's disease fatal? And what drama will the contestant _cook_ up this time? Find out most of these questions right now on day ten of Total Drama Letterz!

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

Gary sat on a hill overlooking the camp with his knees drawn up. He was in a very good mood as he had been since yesterday; it was owing to the fact he and Raven had hooked up.

"_I guess this is what love feels like_." Thought Gary.

He felt happy indeed; though he did have one concern. What would everyone else think, would it be possible they would vote him off for dating someone on an opposing team? He was certain his parents would approve, but what of his Team mates?

"Well; I guess I could just keep it secret and to myself." Said Gary to himself as he looked up at the clouds.

"Keep what to yourself?" Asked Vinnie as he walked up and sat next to Gary.

Gary's eyes widened, Vinnie had just heard him and might be expecting an explanation. Vinnie was his friend so he could tell him … but would he tell anyone else?"

"Oh nothing; just a sweet nothing." Said Gary casually.

Vinnie was not convinced and joined Gary in looking at the clouds.

"C'mon dude; you can tell me what your thinking, trust me." Said Vinnie while making a cross over his heart. "Are you happy about something because you've been a little giddy ever since yesterday; bee in your bonnet?"

"Nope; though Kasimar sure had a few. Heheyeyeyeh." Chuckled Gary.

"Good one." Smirked Vinnie. "But is something bothering you; are you … Oh, I get it."

Vinnie had a sudden sly smirk and Gary wondered if he'd figured it out; was it really that obvious?

"So; what do you think it is?" Asked Gary.

"You and Raven kissed didn't you!" Chuckled Vinnie. "Gary you sly dawg!"

Gary groaned in embarrassment and nodded with a happy sigh.

"Yes Vinnie; you are correct, me and Raven kissed … as of today we are officially boyfriend and girlfriend." Confirmed Gary as he hid his face with his left hand. "Just don't tell anyone ok?"

"Don't worry; my lips are sewn shut … wow; Uzuri's mannerisms are rubbing off on me." Said Vinnie with a manly swoon.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no lips so I avoid that fate!**

**Gary: Methinks I know who the second couple to hook up will be.** (Gary raises his unibrow up and down).

* * *

"You seem to really like Uzuri." Acknowledged Gary. "What is it you particularly like about her?"

"I don't really know; she's cute, she's way smarter than she's given credit for, she makes me laugh and she keeps a sunny disposition no matter what happens. She's … my kind of girl; though why I'm telling you this I don't know." Explained Vinnie distantly.

"Because I'm your friend?" Guessed Gary. "But you seem to get angry when people call her a freak; why exactly is that, I mean, I can understand it would piss you off, but any exact reason?"

"That's an easy one; I despise people being treated because they are different. Once I got pinchy my metal arm I was tormented by some people due to being different from the norm. I eventually got them to stop but I grew to dislike prejudice people. And I don't want Uzuri to experience what I went through." Explained Vinnie with a sigh. "Why can't we all just get along?"

"I don't know … but still; I think it looks like you've got a real _thing_ for Uzuri; you'll be able to be open about it as you're both on the same team."

"I don't see why you and Raven can't be open about your love." Said Vinnie in puzzlement.

"I don't want Kasimar and Wallace to find out … I can tell if they found out, well, what they would do would be the exact opposite of a unicorn tea party on a fluffy rainbow of sunshine."

* * *

**Confessional: Tea parties are fun!**

**Vinnie: Interesting way of putting it. Well; Gary has my sworn word I won't tell anyone unless he wants me to. I keep my promises, especially when I make one to a friend.**

* * *

Up, down, up, down. That was what Oscar was doing with a heavy barbell. Kasimar and Wallace weren't in the cabin so it left Oscar alone with some good time to have a morning work out. If he wanted to be in the Olympics he had to be in tip top physical condition; also the stronger he was the harder a punch he would leave if a situation ever came to that.

"Urrgh! Looks like I'm building up a good sweat." Said Oscar as he continued his workout. "That'll burn off some calories and improve the muscle."

Oscar lifting the barbell up and down for a few minutes and as he did his thoughts began to wander. He began to think of his team mates still in the competition.

"_Lavender; she's a great leader and has no problems standing up to people. Mable, well, you gotta have blue hair, and I think her healthy eating is very responsible. Kasimar, a vile sociopath, enough said. Wallace, not much better but at least he has a stopping point even if it varies. Raven, she's kind hearted, it's good that she's come out of her shell, and she seemed really happy yesterday, hmm. And then there's Xaria..." _

Oscar put the barbell down and sipped some water from his Toy Story sports flask; not many people knew it, only his closest friends, but he was quite a big fan of the toy story series.

Oscar silently continued his review of his last team mate in his head while wiping his forehead of sweat.

"_Xaria's got a good heart; I can tell. She's Hypercompetant at some of the challenges, and she punched Chris in the phobia challenge, gotta respect that, Heeheehaw. She might be a little grumpy; but she's my friend all the same. I don't know why but seeing her spooked or upset, well, it makes me concerned and angry. I wonder what it is that she wouldn't tell me. Eh, I won't pry; I'm not a Mr. Nosey."_

"Hey Oscar; having a good workout." Said Lavender from the doorway.

Oscar quickly hid his water bottle behind his back and nodded calmly.

"You know it Red; I've got to keep myself fit, everyone on this team plays a crucial part and mine is the brawn." Said Oscar as he silently slipped his water bottle into his pocket without Lavender noticing.

"Everyone has a part? Errm, what exactly do Wallace and Kasimar add to the team? If anything they destroy all morale." Said Lavender as she blew one of her red bangs out of her eyes.

"Exactly that. They're our scapegoats if we lose." Explained Oscar. "I personally have had enough of Kasimar, he's prejudiced, sexist and a complete maniac! And to make matters worse I have to sleep in the same cabin as him, what a world, what a world."

"I know; I didn't do anything to him and he treats me like road kill." Sighed Lavender as she leaned against the doorway. "I can only imagine what he'll do if he gets to the merge."

"Well you have my solemn word that I'm voting for him next ceremony no matter what." Assured Oscar. "Is the next challenge starting yet?"

"Not yet; it'll probably be another hour or so." Said Lavender. "I think I'm going to catch some rays on the beach, have a good work out."

"Catch you later Red." Waved Oscar as Lavender left for the beach.

As Lavender left Oscar picked up the barbell and began lifting it again; for a moment the image of Xaria entered his head. He quickly shook if off and began working out again though he couldn't help but wonder why that had happened.

"_When the road looks rough ahead, and you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed, you just remember what your old pal said; boy you've got a friend in me_." Thought Oscar to himself with a smile as that was his motto.

* * *

**Confessional: You've got a friend in me!**

**Oscar: Working out in peace reminds me of being back in the gym back home. I'm on platinum membership and I'm there quite often; though there was that one time I left the sink running and it caused a flood … some things are best left forgotten.**

**Lavender: Oscar is the only male on the team with any sanity. He's nice and is a very valuable asset to the team. Completely the opposite of Winkus and Dinkus. Carlton was nice enough but he was scared of everything so wasn't as useful. Also I have to say … five days and no vote offs! Woohoo!**

* * *

Raven was lying on the sand on the beach soaking up some rays. She was wearing her one piece purple bikini and had her eyes closed in relaxation. The next challenge wasn't going to start for a little while so it was time to just relax. Raven felt sleepy from all the sun rays and soft sand.

"_I think going on this crazy game show is the best thing that has ever happened to me_." Thought Raven to herself. "_I've really opened up and I don't stutter anymore, I've made a lot of close friends … and I've got a boyfriend_! _Life is good_."

Raven giggled to herself after the last few words; for a moment she wondered what Gary would think of her bikini but pushed the thought out of her mind, it was probably the sun.

"_And to think all it took to make me open up was having my book spoiled_. _I should thank Kasimar … or I would if I didn't despise the dick._" Thought Raven sarcastically. "_I wonder what jerkass he's committing now … ah who cares_?"

Raven turned a little to lie on her side; maybe she could get a quick snooze before more torture began. Before she could nod off a shadow was cast over her.

"Nice bikini; but it would be better if you were wearing a bikini thong if you know what I mean! Yahahaha!" Laughed a perverted, cruel, deep voice filled with negativity.

Raven opened her eyes and sat up. Kasimar was standing in front of her and was looking her up and down.

"Do you have a problem?" Asked Raven irritably. "I was just about to have a snooze!"

"I know; that's why I had to come over here." Smirked Kasimar unkindly. "I just love upsetting people, it's funny!"

"Just go away! I don't have time to listen to your _pathetic_ attempts to upset me!" Said Raven as she crossed her arms.

"Pathetic?" Snarled Kasimar before grinning horribly. "I'm not pathetic! At least I'm not such a failed abortion that my parents considered suicide at my birth to get away from me."

Raven blinked and felt anger rising up inside her; that was such a horrible insult!

"Go away "Krapimar'; I'm not scared of you." Retorted Raven.

"Oh no, your words wound me." Said Kasimar sarcastically. "Well; I guess I'll go … maybe after I grope a feel. Yahaha!"

Kasimar took a step forward but before Raven could even try to kick him in the balls someone ran up behind Kasimar.

WHACK!

Kasimar blinked twice, swayed on the spot and collapsed completely unconscious on the sand. Raven looked to see who had done that; she smiled sweetly to see it was Gary holding a plank of wood.

"Thanks Gary; he was really starting to upset me a little." Said Raven gratefully.

"Think nothing of it Ravy." Smiled Gary.

"Oo! Is that my pet name?" Asked Raven with a blush.

"It could be if you want it to be." Said Gary as he scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Me likey!" Giggled Raven. "Maybe I could call you Kissy Cook. But where did you get the plank of wood?"

"Well; I saw what Kasimar was doing so in my moment of rage I ripped a plank of wood off the Dock of Shame." Explained Gary. "So … would you care for a stroll along the beach? Nobodies around to see us yet."

"Sounds good." Smiled Raven as she got to her feet.

They held hands and walked past Kasimar; as they did Gary gave the unconscious Kasimar a hard kick.

"Sorry; didn't see you there." Said Gary angrily.

* * *

**Confessional: I would have done that if I had legs!**

**Gary: I don't take kindly to people messing with my friends; especially my girlfriend.**

**Raven: How can you not like a guy who beats up a bully with a wooden plank just to make sure you're safe? **(Raven giggles). **Gary said that maybe voting Kasimar off wouldn't be a bad move … but he also said that without Wallace Kasimar has nothing … who should I vote for first?**

**Kasimar: **(He has a bandage on his head). **OW! How did that stupid girl hurt me without touching me? This is why girls should be shipped off to some remote island ... oh wait; we're already on one! Yahaha!**

**Lavender: **(She is smiling slyly). **When I got to the beach I couldn't help but notice Raven and Gary holding hands and Raven resting her head on Gary's shoulder. Is there something she's not telling me, hmmm? **(Lavender giggles happily).

* * *

Uzuri was in the mess hall drawing once more; she had her head down and her pencil moving fast, she was clearly concentrating hard. One could wonder what she was drawing as she had her head concealing any view of the paper and she was giggling every now and then. Spider was nearby taking one of his pills with some water and noticed Uzuri drawing and cheerfully laughing.

Spider knew Uzuri was a little, well, odd, and said some pretty creepy and scary stuff like when she arrived on the dock back on the first day of the competition, but it couldn't hurt to say hello and ask what she was so happy about.

"Hmmm; maybe I should give him a cobra tattoo." Pondered Uzuri with her funny serious face. "Yes; I think I'll do that."

"Hi Uzuri; what are *cough* you drawing?" Asked Spider as he walked up and took a seat on the opposite side of the table Uzuri was on.

"Eep! Err, nothing! Nothing at all!" Said Uzuri as she quickly folded the paper in an instant and put it in her pocket. "Just a doodle, just a doodle. Teehee!"

"If you say so; say *sneeze* are you an *cough* artist?" Asked Spider as he sniffled a little.

"You could correctly say I am!" Nodded Uzuri as she reached under the table and came up with what seemed to be a sketchbook with the word 'Uzuri' on the front. "Want to see my works of art?"

Spider thought for a millisecond; what exactly would Uzuri consider art to be? Then he thought to himself, how bad could it be?

"Alright; let's see *cough* what you've been working *gag* on." Smiled Spider.

"Hooray! Prepare to be blown away! Teehee!" Said Uzuri happily as she opened her sketchbook and showed it to Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: He didn't know what he was in for.**

**Spider: **(He looks wide eyed and a little disturbed). **Errm; what is there to ***cough* **say really? Uzuri really ***cough* **brings a new meaning to the word ***sneeze* **unique. Her art was a little ***cough***, well,** **stark raving bazonkas … but it actually** *cough* **looked like proper art to me.**

* * *

Uzuri waited for Spider's opinion on her art with a very eager and excited facial expression. Spider closed the book and slid it across to Uzuri.

Uzuri's art had consisted of pictures like people getting tortured in deathtraps, eldritch abomination monsters and a few well known fictional characters like the Jigsaw Killer and Lord Voldemort, but they looked even scarier than they usually did.

"Well; what do you think?" Asked Uzuri before sadly sighing. "You hate it don't you? Everyone does to be honest."

"Not at *cough* all!" said Spider quickly and with a smile. "So what if your art is *cough* rather unusual; I can see raw talent in there. You *sneeze* should draw what appeals to you and work your way *cough* from there. I actually like it even *cough* though horror related things scare me. Well done."

Uzuri was silent for a moment before she let out a loud squee of joy.

"Eeeeeei! Someone likes my work! Hooray!" Said Uzuri with a happy smile. "I feel a warm gut melting fuzzy inside me; if it weren't for the fact I like someone else I'd kiss you! Teehee!"

Uzuri picked up her sketchbook and pencil and she got up to leave the mess hall.

"Thank you Spider!" Called Uzuri as she left the mess hall.

* * *

**Confessional: Where a little goes a long way!**

**Uzuri: Getting a compliment on my artwork felt really, REALLY good! I'm not really used to compliments. **(Uzuri sighs before smiling again). **Spider's really nice! That Nakia girl was so wrong about him; he's going to make some girl very happy one day! Teehee! Love makes me feel all tickly inside!**

**Spider: Maybe I'm a sissy for** *cough*** this … but making people feel happy** *cough*** or cheering them up makes me ***sneeze* **feel good. I guess a good ***cough* **deed is its own reward.**

* * *

Spider watched Uzuri skip away merrily while humming a tune to herself and he smiled.

"That felt *cough* good." Said Spider as he took out his inhaler and breathed with it for a few seconds.

"Morning Spider." Waved Quana as she walked into the mess hall for breakfast. "I noticed Uzuri looked quite happy; anything to do with you?"

"Well; yes. I complimented *cough* her art. It may be kinda creepy but *sneeze* I can really see talent and inspiration in it." Said Spider as Quana sat down across from him. "She said that absolutely no one likes her art *cough* but I think I got the message through *sneeze* that not everyone dislikes it. She's really very good."

"That was a very nice thing you did Spider; I bet at hospital you're the most popular guy there." Beamed Quana.

"Well; I guess I'm*cough* pretty well liked there … but at *gag* high school everyone avoids me because they *cough* don't want to get sick and because they think I'm a *sneeze* useless sick freak. Not many *cough* people give me a much of a chance."

"Well they sound like jerks." Said Quana as Chef Hatchet placed a plate of rather crispy toast in front of her. "Thanks Chef."

"No problem singer girl." Shrugged Chef Hatchet as he left back to the kitchen.

Quana took a hesitant bite of the toast … and she didn't even gag.

"Wow; this is actually pretty good. Looks like Gary's lessons are improving Chef's cooking ability. But Spider; how many friends do you have?"

"Here or back *cough* home?" Asked Spider nervously.

"Back home." Said Quana.

"Well; back home I have *cough* three friends in hospital … and *cough* that's it." Said Spider while hanging his head.

Quana was very surprised; in his whole life Spider had only had three friends; is that how prejudiced people were nowadays? Quana saw Spider was feeling sad and felt an unhappy lump of sympathy in her gut.

* * *

**Confessional: My only friend is the dressing room.**

**Quana: **(She looks quite sad). **Poor Spider; is that how few friends he has? Why is it people always judge someone before knowing them? What is this world coming to? **(Quana sighs and hangs her head). **For some reason seeing Spider unhappy makes me feel really sad as well, I wonder why. He's such a sweet guy who needs to be given a chance.**

* * *

"Is that how few friends you've had?" Asked Quana hesitantly.

"Do animals *cough* count?" Asked Spider. "I mean; some doctors and *cough* my family are nice and all … but *sneeze* they're not exactly my age. And then there's…"

Spider trailed off and mumbled something that Quana caught one word of.

"Nakia? Something to do with her bothering you Spider?" Asked Quana while thinking back to the foul prejudice brat.

"Well; it's just that … she was basically *cough* a reminder *cough* of all the prejudice I've had to put up with." Sighed Spider sadly. "At least everyone else *sneeze* on the team is nice. And Uzuri is *splutter* pretty kind as well."

"Do you _like_ her?" Asked Quana while batting her eyelashes.

"No; not in that *cough* way." Replied spider. "She likes someone *cough* else anyway … and I like someone else as *gag* well."

Upon this revelation Quana grew very interested.

"Oh really? Who is it?" Asked Quana with starry eyes.

"Err … I can't say." Said Spider nervously.

"Well; if you're sure." Nodded Quana. "But she must be a nice girl."

"She is." Nodded Spider.

As Quana finished her toast, said goodbye and left the mess hall she didn't notice Spider staring after her dreamily.

* * *

**Confessional: The singer and the Spider.**

**Spider: That was close. I just ***cough* **don't think I'm brave enough to tell ***cough*** Quana how I feel. And I already ***sneeze* **know she doesn't feel the ***gag*** same way, she never will.** (Spider sighs sadly).** Inevitably she will fall for someone ***cough* **handsome, dashing and strong, everything I'm ***splutter* **not. That's what I fear ***cough* **at least.**

* * *

Eleanor sat on her bed looking into the cage at her two pet ferrets; Dandelion looked a little plumper since she had arrived at the Island, a sign she was getting nearer the time to give birth. Currently Eleanor's pet ferrets, Frost and Dandelion, were snuggled up together in their cage on a mound of sawdust looking up at their owner letting out an occasional happy squeak.

"I love you two; such little cuties." Giggled Eleanor as she opened the hatch on the cage and reached inside to stroke Frost under the chin. The male ferret yipped in approval as his mate looked up at Eleanor with beady eyes.

"I got a treat for you." Said Eleanor as she reached into her pocket and took out a small piece of dry chicken which she put in with the ferrets.

The two mammals yipped in thanks and began to share the meat together. Eleanor watched them and smiled.

"I just love seeing those two together; happy and squeaky." Said Eleanor with a happy sigh.

"Bonding with your cabin pets are you me blond and green haired forest lassie?" Asked Barney as he leaned against the doorway. "You and those ferrets go together like bacon and fudge as I found out in catering class that one time."

"Well they're my pets; I'm quite close to them, I know they don't really understand me, nor do I understand them but I have a sort of 'feel' for what they want." Said Eleanor before raising an eyebrow. "Wait; bacon and fudge, seriously? Who tries that combination?"

"You're looking at one of them." Chuckled Barney. "It was free practical; I wanted to try something new. But that's not important; I just thought I'd let you know breakfast is ready … and for once its actually edible."

"Really? That's a nice change." Said Eleanor in relief. "After nine days of eating stuff like mystery meat, orange cabbage and purple spaghetti my stomach needs rest."

"I hear ya me cabin girl." Nodded Barney in full agreement. "I'd like something nice as well, like Captain Crunch."

"Of course." Giggled Eleanor with an amused sigh. "A pirate enthusiast would like a pirate themed breakfast."

"Not only that but its really crunchy yaaar!" Said Barney with a merry laugh.

* * *

**Confessional: Crunchy as crocodile!**

**Eleanor: Barney is quite unique; he really does make me laugh and thus makes me keep my sanity. I think my team is the friendliest; that's some good fortune on my part.**

* * *

"You're the most original guy here, you know that?" Smiled Eleanor as she scratched Dandelion behind the ears.

"You bonding with your ferrets reminds me of my friendship with Blackbeard." Said Barney in remembrance.

"Wait; how is that possible? You're sixteen and Blackbeard lived more than a hundred years ago." Said Eleanor in confusion.

"I didn't mean him, even if he is the most legendary pirate who ever set sail. I meant my pet koi." Explained Barney. "I've had him for a year and a half now, I just love his blank fishy stare. It's the reason I don't eat koi."

"…Barney; I bet someday you'll make some lucky girl very happy, you're just so interesting." Said Eleanor as she closed the cage hatch on her ferrets as she and Barney began to walk to the mess hall.

"Well there is someone I kinda … hey!" said Barney as he flushed with embarrassment.

"Looks like someone's in loooooove!" Teased Eleanor playfully in a sing song voice.

All Barney could do was blush as red as the hair of the girl he had started to like.

* * *

**Confessional: A pirate in love? Boy; now I've seen everything.**

**Barney: Yaaar! That girl is just … well its like she can read minds! That or she's a professional at reverse psychology. Well; the fish is out of the net now so I guess I can't really hide it from you scurvy dogs at home much longer … I have a bit of a fancy for Lavender. Yes, mock me if you want … but hey, she's tough, athletic, a good leader and she really tries her best no matter what.** (Barney sighs giddily). **My type of girl.**

**Lavender: I keep getting the feeling someone is complimenting me behind my back … I wonder why I keep thinking that? Maybe I'm just going paranoid due to the pressure.**

* * *

"Mwuhahaha! Take that squirrel!" Laughed Wallace evilly as he kicked a squirrel full force. "I'm so evil that I kick squirrels! Mwahahahahahaha! Yeah!"

Wallace watched with evil eyes behind his sunglasses as the frightened squirrel ran up a tree and into its home. Wallace chuckled and continued walking along humming tunelessly and evilly. He took out his notebook and flipped through a few pages.

"Let's see, what evil should I do today? I've kicked a dog, err, squirrel already. Hmm; maybe I could eat a kitten because I'm so evil, or perhaps I could steal Lavenders underwear and string it up the flagpole. This could take some thought." Said Wallace dastardly to himself as he walked along.

"What are you so happy about Wallace?" Asked Tabitha as she walked past.

"Nothing much; I'm just debating what evil I should commit today. I need to be a brutally malicious as I can possibly be during my stay on this evil island. After all; I am THE bad guy! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he whipped out his remote and pressed a button. As per usual loud evil organ music began playing from nowhere.

"How do you do that?" Asked Tabitha curiously as she began to attempt to manipulate Wallace. "You must be super smart to have built such a complicated device."

"Why thank you." Chuckled Wallace before frowning at Tabitha. "But cut the bullcrap; your nice girl act won't work on me. I'm so evil that I can tell just by looking at someone if they are evil … and you seem truly diabolical. I mean; pretending to be someone's friend; pretty weeeeeneeeey."

Tabitha blinked in surprise; this insane sunglasses wearing mafia looking bad guy knew what she was really like. Tabitha scowled and took a step towards Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional: When villains collide.**

**Wallace: The best evil action always happens when two pure evil complete monsters collide with each other. It's a tough world and there can only be one main antagonist … and that will be me! Mwahahahahaha!**

**Tabitha: So Wallace isn't fooled? No matter, I'm sure I can, ahem, '**_**convince**_**' him to keep quiet if you catch my drift. **

* * *

"Like you're any better! You've cheated in every single challenge so far! And you're pretending to be Kasimar's friend aren't you?" Spat Tabitha angrily.

"I lie, I kid, I tell untruthful statements but I never pretend." Said Wallace as he folded his arms with a smirk. "Kasimar is my henchman, my right hand man if you will. I fully intend to take him to the finals with me … he is a worthy apprentice."

"You do realize that Kasimar doesn't give a mule's ass about anyone but himself right?" Said Tabitha snarkerly. "Once he has no more need for you he's going to drop you like a used tissue."

"At least I don't bad mouth my ally in the confessional." Replied Wallace. "I've snuck into the viewing room before; I've seen every confessional, I know quite a bit about what is going on and I intend to make good on that knowledge."

"Listen you little rat." Snarled Tabitha as she towered over the shorter villain. "If you say even a quarter of a word of my true nature to _ANYONE_ then you'll regret it."

"Oh really; how?" Asked Wallace dryly.

"I have a large number of powerful and feared lawyers in my family; if you cross me then I'll get your house from you and have you kicked onto the streets. You'll have nowhere to go, no money, no friends, you'll have _nothing_. So I'd keep quite if I were you."

"Gee wiz; resorting to blackmail already eh?" Said Wallace with an eye roll behind his sunglasses.

"Blackmail is such an ugly word; let's just call it 'threatening to ruin someone's life'." Smirked Tabitha. "Oh; and good luck in the challenge today, you're going to need it the way you're going."

"I'll keep that in mind thanks." Said Wallace sarcastically as he walked away into the woods and out of Tabitha's sight.

"Oh; and your henchman is unconscious in the infirmary." Called the manipulator.

Tabitha looked in the direction that Wallace has disappeared in and chuckled.

"Blackmail is always fun; really good way to get a point across." Smirked Tabitha.

A bomb was thrown from within the overgrowth to Tabitha's feet and it was beeping speedily.

"Oh crap!" Cried Tabitha as she made a run for it.

BOOM!

The bomb exploded and knocked Tabitha off her feet though she wasn't harmed.

"That little _rat_." Snarled Tabitha as she got to her feet.

* * *

**Confessional: The rat came first in Chinese myths.**

**Wallace: I always carry at least twenty explosives on me at all times for situations such as that. I'm always prepared. Mwahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Mable was sitting on her bed in the Team Grenade cabin on the girl's side. She had been dyeing her hair to make it as shiny and blue as possible. She had already completed the orange dye so now all she had to do was wait for the blue variety to dry which would only take just a few minutes.

"What do you think Xaria?" Asked Mable as she swished her very large ponytail around. "Pretty stylish right?"

"Why are you asking me?" Asked Xaria from her bed. "What do I know about hair dye?"

"Well you've got dye in yours haven't you?" Pointed out Mable.

"True; but my style isn't as, for a lack of a better word, wacky, as yours is." Replied Xaria. "But if I have to give an answer … its colorful as a rainbow, give or take a few colors."

"Thanks; I aim to distinguish myself from the crowd." Smiled Mable. "I think the dye should be finished drying now so I guess I can move around."

Mable got to her feet and reached into her suitcase; she came out with a pair of yellow leg warmers. After taking her shoes off she began to slip them on.

"Mind if I ask a question?" Asked Xaria as she looked at Mable.

"Sure; what's up?" Asked Mable.

"Why do you even bother wearing leg warmers? It's the summer! It's like twenty four degrees outside; not really leg warmer weather." Said Xaria curiously. "Any particular reason why?"

"Oh, no real reason." Shrugged Mable as she put her shoes back on. "They're just stylish … well, they're my style anyway."

"…Well I guess everyone is different." Shrugged Xaria. "I'm unique with my grouchiness and skill at pinball."

"You aren't a grouch." Said Mable nicely. "You just have a mood sometimes, but so does everyone. I'm not always happy all of the time and neither is anyone else. But pinball sounds like a fun game; I've never played it, what is it like?"

"You've just got to stop the ball going into the hole at the bottom of the table. You need a quarter to play as well." Explained Xaria as she sat up and stretched out with a yawn. "Just be the flippers and you should get a high score. Nobody has beaten my record yet."

* * *

**Confessional: LOL you said ball!**

**Xaria: I don't know why but I feel like I haven't used the confessional very much. Eh; no matter, I'm not astoundingly interesting anyway. **(Xaria stares into space for a moment before coming back to the real world). **I had a lot of time on my hands in my preteen years, I preferred to stay out of the house and I ended up spending quite a while in the local arcade playing pinball. It really helped with easing my stress levels.**

* * *

"Maybe we should get outside and start the day." Suggested Mable. "We don't want to be late for the challenge do we? But talking about pinball is actually pretty interesting."

"An unpopular girl has gotta have a hobby right?" Shrugged Xaria.

"Good morning girls." Greeted Jimmy from the doorway with a wave. "How you doing?"

"I'm fine Jimmy; thanks for asking." Smiled Mable.

"I could be better … but I suppose that I'll get by." Said Xaria with a nonchalant shrug. "Why are you saying good morning to us? We're not on your team."

"I know; but its no reason that we can't be nice to each other right?" Smiled Jimmy. "I just came to let you know that breakfast is nearly over and surprisingly Chef's food is pretty good."

"Chef cooking something good? Now I've seen everything." Mused Xaria. "Well; I hope he's got toaster pastries."

"Sadly he does not." Said Jimmy apologetically. "Shame really; they taste really good, especially the ones with melted raspberry jam."

"I love raspberry jam! The organic type that is." Said Mable while drooling a little. "I remember the time I tried making my own … it left quite a mess."

"How much of a mess?" Asked Jimmy.

"A big one; it was very sticky." Said Mable as she chuckled at the messy memory.

"I'm a klutz in the kitchen." Said Xaria as she slipped her shoes on and got to her feet out of bed. "I could probably set cereal on fire I'm that talentless."

"Ah don't worry Xaria." Smiled Jimmy. "Nobodies good at everything; if any claims they are then they are a lying Mary Sue. So; looks like its time for breakfast and … then…"

Jimmy trailed off and looked at something on the ground with wide eyes. Mable and Xaria wondered what it could be and followed Jimmies gaze to something on the ground. Something silky and red. It was a crimson red thong.

"Is that … Good grief!" Yelled Jimmy as he ran off covering his eyes. "I'll never be able to un-see that!"

Xaria and Mable watched Jimmy run off towards the mess hall and did two things. Mable began to laugh while Xaria sighed in exasperation and mild amusement.

"Just so you know … that is not mine." Said Xaria quickly to deny any suspicion. "Red isn't my color, I prefer yellow."

"Can't be me; I wear blue." Said Mable before suddenly bursting out into a mirthful fir of giggles. "I think that must belong to Lavender! My, my! Wait … did we just admit our underwear colors to the world?"

There was a brief moment of silence.

"Aw crap." Groaned Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: Pure fan service!**

**Xaria: **(She has her head in her hand). **Sometimes I forget that cameras are watching us every second of the day. I bet some perverts in the audience liked that. Meh; at least Kasimar didn't hear that.**

**Mable: Ah who cares about that little bitty mistake? It's funny! I mean; remember last season in the trust episode? I felt so bad for Gwen. And poor Jimmy; he didn't need to see that did he? Boy; I didn't think Lavender would wear that type of underwear … but I'm getting off track, we're now into the double digit days and my team has only lost once! I'm feeling pretty good about this.**

* * *

"Attention boys and girls and those of neither description like Lavender and Uzuri!" Said Chris over the intercom. "The time has come for your tenth challenge and I think I'm going to be really fu_lfilled_ with this one. Haha; I bet none of you are smart enough to work out that hint. Well anyway; come to the mess hall and I shall give you a run down on what you have to do. Chris Maclean out."

"Stupid Chris." Grumbled Lavender as she walked up from the beach to the mess hall; she was fortunate to have not changed into he swim wear, that would have possibly made her late during changing. "Why does he discriminate against me anyway?"

At that moment a loud fart echoed across camp through the intercom and the sound of a relieved sigh was heard.

"I've been holding that in all day." Said Chris with a smile. "That's a real load out … wait, is this intercom still on? Oh fu-!"

The intercom turned off and almost everyone began to laugh at Chris; even Chef was laughing.

* * *

**Confessional: Farts are the highest form of humor.**

**Uzuri: **(She is happily giggling in mirth and falls off the seat). **Silly Chris!**

**Jimmy: **(He slaps his knee and laughs merrily). **I guess Chris doesn't learn from his mistakes eh?**

**Eleanor: **(She is laughing in hysterics). **What a dummy! That's the second time he's done something like that! Hahaaaa!**

**Tabitha: **(She isn't laughing and looks unimpressed). **First everyone laughs at nose picking and now they laugh at … something that rhymes with karting. How immature can those losers get? **

**Chris: **(He is folding his arms crossly and pouting). **That didn't count; I made a simple mistake and it wasn't my fault the intercom was screwing around … I'm awesome so there!**

* * *

Not that much later the sixteen remaining campers were in the mess hall standing in their teams; Chris hadn't arrived yet and some campers were growing impatient.

"What's taking that jerkass so long?" Asked Oscar. "He calls us to the challenge and he can't be bothered to even show up!"

"Maybe he saw that one of his nose hairs was out of place and he is now having a panic attack as we speak." Suggested Gary with a smirk.

Most of the campers chuckled at the joke and backhanded insult at Chris's expense. Raven and Gary smiled at each other when nobody was looking.

"You can stop your frantic worrying; I'm here now." Said Chris as he walked into the mess hall. "Please don't hold your applause or hero worship."

"Yeah right." Scoffed Quana. "I only worship one God … and it isn't you."

"Shut up! I'm good enough to be one!" Said Chris extremely arrogantly. "You're just jealous of me, though it is forgivable as I am Chris Maclean."

* * *

**Confessional: Dickhead alert!**

**Quana: Chris is starting to seriously go past the point of jerkass; his pride is more than that of a thousand people combined. And yes; I'm Christian; I believe but I don't mention it much so people won't be all prejudice like I've what heard can happen.**

**Uzuri: Chris is really mean! He deserves a visit to jigsaw; and when jigsaw had him in his clutches he would.** (Do some things we can't mention in a teenage show; nor will we release it in the DVD, though we have to admit she sure is creative).

**Spider: Quana believes as well; that's ***cough* **a little funny because so ***cough* **do I. Maybe I ***sneeze* **do have a chance; a very small ***cough* **one granted; but a chance all ***cough* **the same.**

**Barney: **(He appears in very serious deep thought). **Have you ever wondered why pineapples don't wear bathrobes?**

* * *

"You may not have noticed it yet but we all hate you." Said Xaria flatly. "We aren't going to worship you when we don't even barely remotely like you."

"Fine!" Said Chris while stamping his foot. "But you'll come crawling back to me; everyone always does. Haha. Now; today's challenge is another favorite from season one. Can anyone guess what it is?"

"Please don't make it be boot camp." Pleaded Eleanor.

"Nope; its not boot camp." Said Chris which made Eleanor sigh in relief.

"Is it the X-treme sports challenge?" Asked Barney.

"Nope! You're still wrong and not anywhere near. Today's challenge is going to be…

…

…

…

…

…

...

...

...

The Cooking challenge."

"Yes!" Cheered Gary as he pumped his fist in cheer and excitement.

"Looks like someone is happy." Said Chris with a nod. "The rules are the same as last time; you are going to be cooking a three course meal for me to eat as I can't be bothered to cook."

"Me neither." Agreed Kasimar with a bandage on his head. "Cooking meals is a girl's job."

All of the females and a large number of the males glared at Kasimar angrily.

"What? It's true." Said Kasimar as he folded his arms. "I'm just making a point."

"He's right you know." Laughed Chris with a foul mean smirk. "But I digress; your task is to cook a three course meal for me to eat and judge. I will be giving each meal a score out of ten based on its appearance, taste and smell, the important things. Whichever team has the most points at the end will win and get a special prize. The second place team, no prize and no vote off so you're still safe. The team that finishes last will be attending a bonfire ceremony and will have to vote someone off … it'll probably be Team Jungle but since they have a Chef I'll give them the benefit of the doubt and say they might come second. Now hop to it everyone, you'll find your supplies in the truck out back."

* * *

**Confessional: A spatula is a chef's very best friend.**

**Gary: So Chris is underestimating me is he? Well that in itself is foolishness. I'm not a boastful person but I think I may have a chance at leading the team to victory today. I wonder what Chris would like? I'm sure I can find something he will enjoy. How glad I am I've managed to get this far … this is a challenge I am made for; and I shall excel! Maybe I could cook a little something for Ravy. **(Gary smiles to himself).

**Tabitha: I don't think I have to worry today; this is a challenge that we have an advantage on because of Gary. I think I could let him be team leader; if only for a single day because he knows more about culinary matters than I do. **

**Raven: Looks like there's no danger of Gary getting voted off this time; that's a relief. I'm not too bad at cooking myself even though I'm nowhere near the skill of Kissy Cook. I just hope the others are good at cooking.**

**Barney: This challenge will be great for my matchmaking! Complimenting a girl on their cooking and giving them dessert related pet names is one of the best ways to win their heart! **

* * *

The contestants began to leave out the door of the mess hall to the truck to get supplies while Chris turned to the cameraman.

"Gary seems happy about this challenge but how long can that mood last in hell's kitchen? We'll be back with you after the commercials but first I leave you four, count em four, questions. What disasters will happen in the kitchen? Will any of the food be edible? Will Uzuri try to serve blood soup? And who will become the eleventh person to walk the dock of shame? Find out the answers to all these questions when we return to Total Drama Letterz!"

"And cut." Said the Cameraman.

"Good; my hair needs a quick gelling … and someone bring me my god damn latté!" demanded Chris.

"You could say please." Muttered chef from within the kitchen. "Pretty boy don't know the first thing about making friends; he's more big headed than an extra large pumpkin."

* * *

Day ten had begun in a big way and its only going to get better! Tune in next time for kitchen mis-haps, crazy cooking, someone talking to raven about her relationship with Gary and the most dramatic Bonfire ceremony yet!


	22. Day 10, Part 2, Dinner at Wawanakwa

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; it belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please, don't steal them.

**The warning: **This chapter contains puking, a jalapeño, flirting, a bully looking up someone's skirt, bullying and a betrayal. You have been warned but it is nothing m rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven** VinniexUzuri and a secret pairing that is getting so easy to spot I will reveal it in the next chapter.

**Note:** Here is the next part of the cooking challenge. This is one of the best chapters in my opinion; I particularly enjoyed writing Uzuri's flirty comment, you'll know it when you read it. Kasimar is back to his old advances with Quana but Spider is on the scene. Overall this chapter was fun to write and I think it is enjoyable. And if you enjoy it a lot then why not write a review as I read and respond to each of them. Also I have now got over 2600 hits; thank you very much to everyone who has read my story so far even if you haven't reviewed for making this possible.

Ready … steady … COOK!

* * *

The teams stood in groups around the truck talking in hushed voices; the groups were their teams and they were speaking quietly because they all wanted to keep their plans a secret from the opposing teams. Despite having the fewest members Team Jungle felt confident; though that is to be expected when you have a highly skilled chef on your team.

"It may go without saying but Gary here has the most skill of anyone in the competition when it comes to culinary know how." Said Tabitha in an attempt to get on Gary's good side. "So I propose for this challenge we let Gary lead us."

"You sure Tabitha?" Asked Gary. "I mean; I'd like to lead but you're a really capable leader."

"Maybe; but a true leader knows when to follow and when to lead. And I think this is a time to follow as I know you are more skilled in the kitchen than me. So; you up for it?" Said Tabitha with her usual false smile.

"You can do it Gary!" Smiled Uzuri.

"…Eh; why not?" Smiled Gary proudly. "This is my kind of challenge after all."

"So; any ideas on what we could cook?" Asked Vinnie. "I hope it isn't too difficult as Pinchy makes cooking a bit hard."

"No problem Vinnie; I have an idea, three ideas in fact. And none of them are very hard." Smiled Gary. "How does Chicken Chowmein, Macaroni Cheese and Blueberry Muffins sound?"

"Sounds yummy!" Said Uzuri with a wide smile. "I love sweet snacks!"

"I bet you love Halloween then." Chuckled Vinnie.

"Of course I do; it's my very favorite holiday." Said Uzuri as her eyes widened in cheerfulness. "Every year since I was five I've gone trick or treating. I usually dress up as a zombie princess or a regenerator; I look so scary that I could win a costume party … or I would if I wasn't banned for being too scary."

"What's a regenerator?" Asked Vinnie.

"A monster from resident evil four that regrows its limbs if you blow them to bits! That goes for its head as well. Teehee!" Said Uzuri sweetly.

"You two seem to get along well so how about you both do the blueberry muffins?" Suggested Gary while winking at Vinnie.

"Sounds good to me." Said Vinnie while noticing the wink. "Do you know how to cook Uzuri?"

"Yesindeedy!" Smiled Uzuri as she began to drool. "Sometimes when I don't feel like watching horror movies, playing horror games or drawing I like to bake snacks, I just LOVE doughnuts!"

"So we've got Vinnie and Uzuri on muffin duty; Tabitha, how do you feel about cooking the macaroni?" Asked Gary.

"Sounds simple enough." Shrugged Tabitha with a nod. "What type of cheese would you recommend?"

"Cheddar for the sauce and Parmesan for the crispy grilled topping." Replied Gary promptly. "You'll want to make sure you don't burn the macaroni tubes; because lets face it, nobody like charbroiled macaroni right?"

"Well; Patch probably would." Pointed out Uzuri with a giggle.

"So I guess that leaves you to do the Chicken Chowmein then." Said Tabitha. "You have cooked it before right?"

"Of course; I wouldn't try something in a competition that I hadn't tried before." Said Gary as he took out his spatula. "I have a good feeling about this challenge; we may have so far lost half our team but I have a simmering flame of hope that we can pull this off."

"I agree." Said Vinnie with a few claps at their temporary leader's speech. "Let's win first place!"

"We'll need to get our ingredients in first." Said Gary as they walked towards the truck. "And be sure to wash your hands before you begin cooking."

* * *

**Confessional: I have no hands to wash!**

**Uzuri: Gary sure is a talented Chef; he's quite a man to be so open about his ability to cook, a lot of guys are embarrassed about that. Maybe I could bake us some doughnuts for after the challenge if I get time.**

**Tabitha: I felt it would be a good move to give up leadership for just this one challenge. It will make them think I'm a team player and if we fail I won't be at fault as I wasn't leading us. It'll be a darn shame to lose Gary but rather him than me.**

**Gary: Well; when life gives you lemons ... you make lemonade, preferably with some sugar so it isn't face twistingly sour. I took the liberty of making Uzuri and Vinnie work together; I think it's obvious they like each other so I thought it would be nice to give them a gentle nudge in the right direction.**

**Vinnie: I'm not the best at cooking … but working with Uzuri should make this fun; she had a way of making anything fun, you just need to get used to her as I have done.**

* * *

Quana looked over her team mates; this challenge might be difficult as she wasn't sure how much kitchen experience the others had. Jimmy was too young to cook unsupervised and Barney might make something blow up. Spider seemed capable but his coughing and sickness might spread germs into the food.

"So guys; do any of you have any suggestions for what we could cook?" Asked Quana. "It should be easy to prepare yet be something Chris, or indeed any other jerkass, could enjoy."

"How about pizza?" Suggested Jimmy. "It's tasty, easy to make and its fun to spin the dough."

"But is it too simple?" Asked Eleanor. "Chris will be looking for any reason to deduce points no matter how hard we try, he's just that mean."

"How about apple pie?" Said Quana. "It's tasty and I think it would be a good dessert meal."

"That might not be *cough* such a great idea." Said Spider as he put a hand to his woozy stomach.

"Why not Spider?" Asked Quana.

"Because I'm really allergic to apples." Explained Spider

Tabitha was passing that moment and heard what Spider said; an interested look grew on her face.

* * *

**Confessional: Allergies are bad mmm'kay?**

**Tabitha: So Spider is allergic to apples is he? Hmmm; I should keep that in mind if I ever get a chance to exploit it.**

* * *

"I have an idea, how about peach pie me hearties?" Said Barney. "Or if you prefer I could make fudge covered bacon."

"Definitely the former." Said Quana with an amused look. "Trust you to try something like that … yet it oddly sounds very delicious."

"So we're in agreement *cough* over peach pie." Said Spider with a sniffle. "What about the *sneeze* main course?"

"Maybe Spaghetti Bolognese." Said Barney. "It's not only great for a decent feed but it's the godfather of spaghetti kisses!"

* * *

**Confessional: If I'm the lady then you are the tramp!**

**Barney: And if Spider and Quana share spaghetti kiss then that's great as well! Yohohoho! **

**Eleanor: I loved Lady and the Tramp; when Trusty got ran over I seriously cried … good thing he lived wasn't it? **(Eleanor smiled sweetly in remembrance).

* * *

The others laughed a little at Barney's joke and agreed to do Spaghetti Bolognaise. That left the starter still to be decided.

"Here's an idea. I went to a Chinese restaurant once with the guys and I had chicken and sweet corn soup; it was wonderful." Said Jimmy in remembrance. "How about we cook that?"

"Great idea little buddy." Said Barney with a thumbs up. "So that settles it; we're cooking Chicken and Sweet Corn soup, Spaghetti Bolognaise and Peach Pie. Sounds delicious me hearties! Yo ho!"

"So who *cough* cooks what?" Asked Spider.

"Well; can you cook without spreading germs?" Asked Barney. "As fun as it would be if Chris the kraken got sick we can't lose this."

"No worries *cough* Barney; I've got a surgeon mask I bought in case a *hard cough* cooking challenge presented itself." Assured Spider.

"Very well then! I think Jimmy and Eleanor should cook the soup as they're both young and young minds think alike." Grinned Barney.

"I see no problem with that." Smiled Eleanor.

"Me neither." Agreed Jimmy.

"Next we'll have our mermaid and my first mate cooking the sea snakes; by that I mean Spider and Quana, of course." Said Barney with a wink to Spider that none of the others noticed.

"Err … if *cough* Quana doesn't mind." Said Spider nervously; to his relief Quana smiled and didn't seem to have a problem with it.

"Sure; I think this'll be fun." Said Quana with a cheerful smile.

"As for me; I will be cooking the swash buckling peach pie." Said Barney while rubbing his hands in excitement. "Now let's hop to it!"

Barney began to head back towards the mess hall but Eleanor was quick to stop him.

"Shouldn't we get the ingredients first?" Asked Eleanor quickly before Barney entered the mess hall.

Barney spun round on his heel and quickly ran back.

"Oh yeah, silly me!" Laughed Barney. "Let's get the ingredients and cook up a sea storm, shall we? Arrrrr!"

"You can't cook weather." Said Jimmy logically. "It's physically impossible to cook the atmosphere."

"It was a rhetorical question." Replied Barney as he lifted a crate labeled 'pasty supplies' onto his back.

* * *

**Confessional: Could you cook up a heat wave for me?**

**Quana: Working with spider should be fun; he's one of the friendliest and nicest guys I've ever met. I just hope Kasimar doesn't try anything, he is Spiders opposite. This shouldn't be too hard … but getting first place might be hard with Gary as an opponent. Still; Spider could turn out to be a good cook. **(Quana looks dreamy for a moment before coming back to reality). **Oh, must have zoned out there for a moment.**

**Jimmy: Cooking is fun; Pablo's mum always baked us cookies every now and then. Toffee chip is crunchy and chewy. Mmmmm!**

**Spider: Maybe cooking with Quana could ***cough*** be a good way to get to** *cough* **get** **to know her. I'm ***cough* **not the best chef but ***sneeze* **I'm sure I could certainly give it** *cough* **a go.**

**Eleanor: Soup is one of the easiest things to cook so this shouldn't be so bad; I feel reasonably confident we could secure second place at least. I love sweet corn, its one of my favorite vegetables … but I really don't like nuts very much, especially peanuts, blech!**

* * *

Team Grenade was still discussing what they could cook for a meal that would meet Chris's lofty standards. As hair gel soup wasn't an option the field wad open for idea pitching.

"Does anyone have any ideas what we could cook?" Asked Lavender. "I haven't taken a cooking class since the ninth grade; I didn't choose it for upper school."

"Neither did I;' cooking is for girls and faggots." Chuckled Kasimar.

"Do you have ANY redeeming qualities you nasty monster?" Asked Lavender angrily. "You've done nothing but upset people since you've arrived! I almost wish we would lose just to kick your ass off this island!"

"You should know by now that evil villains are tougher to squash than cockroaches. Mwahahahahaha!" Smirked Wallace while adjusting his sunglasses. "But every villain has a weakness and the area I have no talent is cooking, I've avoided it ever since my ill fated self buttering toaster back in the eighth grade."

"I won't ask." Said Mable. "But I might have a suggestion on what we could cook; how about a tropical fruit salad in mango juice?"

"That sounds pretty tasty." Smiled Oscar. "I say it's a go."

"And I say it's a crap idea." Scoffed Kasimar. "If you want to impress someone you've gotta make your dish stand out, that or make it really spicy like my favorite curry … The Bollywood Burner."

"What's that?" Asked Raven.

"Only the hottest curry in the world." Smirked Kasimar. "And I can eat it without a single drop of drink."

"Yeah right." Scoffed Xaria in disbelief. "You'd cry like a baby if you felt any pain whatsoever."

"Oh really? Watch this!" Chuckled Kasimar as he grabbed a jalapeno from the truck, took a big bite into it and swallowed … he didn't even flinch. "Tasty."

The other six were stunned, how could a bully who couldn't take a hit manage to chomp a raw jalapeno with no drink?

"Impressive … but we still hate you." Said Xaria with an eye roll. "I say we go with Mable's idea."

"I agree; fruit salad is healthy and delicious, plus it's a cheap meal. A great combination if I do say so myself." Agreed Oscar.

"I don't care either way; I hate healthy food." Smirked Wallace. "I'm so evil that I can do this!"

Wallace grabbed the remaining half of the jalapeno off Kasimar and in the blink of an eye stuffed in it Xaria's mouth before she could react.

There was silence for a moment as tears of hotness began to well up in Xaria's eyes before she screamed.

"Aaaaargh! Get me some water!" Wailed Xaria as she began to cry from the unbearable heat for she had a sensitive tongue; she ran into the communal wash rooms at full speed.

Something inside Oscar snapped and he picked up Wallace by the scruff of his T-shirt.

"What was the point of that?" Asked Oscar in a deadly whisper. "You jerkass! Rawr!"

Oscar threw Wallace up high and the bad guy crashed head first into a tree and lay in an unconscious heap. Oscar grabbed a bottle of milk from inside the truck and took off towards the communal wash rooms after Xaria.

"I'll be back shortly; I'll just help Xaria, continue without me!" Called back Oscar.

"Heh; that was funny!" Said Kasimar as she slapped his knee in amusement. "What a weak little girl! Unable to handle a man's food! Yahahaha!"

Mable growled and kicked Kasimar in the balls full force.

"Oh … my tenders!" Squealed Kasimar in a girly high pitched voice as he dropped to the ground.

"Thank you Mable." Said Lavender as she high fived her best friend. "So; we're in agreement on a Tropical Fruit Salad; any other ideas?"

"How about Lasagna?" Suggested Raven. "It isn't that hard and it tastes lovely, I think it's a good option."

"Great idea Raven." Smiled Lavender. "And I think for a starter we could have some egg rice; but who should cook what?"

"Someone's going to need to keep an eye on Kasimar and Wallace." Said Mable. "How about I, you and Kasimar cook the lasagna, Raven and Wallace cook the egg rice and Oscar and Xaria make the fruit salad as they seem to work well together."

"Then it's settled; to the kitchen!" Giggled Raven before kicking Kasimar on her way past. "That's for this morning jerk!"

* * *

**Confessional: No cursed Tiki idol this time!**

**Lavender: Mable split us up well; if me and her work together we can keep Kasimar in line and at the same time make a good meal. Raven's really opened up recently and with certain 'recent events' I think she can handle Wallace. Oscar and Xaria should have no problem but we can help each other because there is no I in team.**

**Mable: After that display I dislike Wallace much more than I already did; that was completely unprovoked. He's such a Smeg Head, more so than Rimmer!**

**Kasimar: Why do I keep getting hurt so much? Just so you people out there know … I have no shame in hitting a girl; if anything its funny to harass them until they squirm and they squeal! Yahahaha!**

**Oscar: I hope Xaria's ok; I know how hot jalapeño's are and I think Wallace did as well; looks like I've found a second arch enemy.**

* * *

Xaria gasped for air as tears continued to exit her eyes; she had never liked spicy foods at all and this sudden heat in one go was agony.

"Oh god make it stop!" Cried Xaria as she drank water from the tap whilst not caring how unclean it was.

The water helped very little and the frenzy of heat that Xaria was unaccustomed to continued its assault on her sensitive tongue. Oscar then burst into the washroom and tossed the bottle of milk to Xaria which she thankfully caught.

"Quick; drink it, it'll sooth the pain." Said Oscar assuringly.

Xaria didn't need to be told twice; she took out the cork and began to gulp down the bottle rapidly and in just fifteen seconds it was all gone. Xaria coughed twice and placed the bottle next to the sink.

"*Gasp* Thank you very *gasp* much Oscar!" Said Xaria extremely gratefully. "It felt like someone had lit napalm in my mouth."

"Think nothing of it; what are friends for?" Smiled Oscar. "And I don't like it when people hurt my friends, I threw Wallace into a tree you see."

"Did he die?" Asked Xaria.

"No; he is still alive." Confirmed Oscar.

"Damn." Said Xaria with a half joking chuckle. "Well; he's earned my vote the next time we lose. But why did he do it?"

"For the sake of being evil." Said Oscar with disdain for the wannabe bad guy. "He's completely nuts alright. Do you feel better now? We've got some cooking to do."

"Sure; no problem." Shrugged Xaria. "But why did you help me?"

"Easy … because you're my friend." Said Oscar. "And a true friend looks out for others."

Xaria was silent as they walked back to the mess hall; as they were about to enter she said two words.

"Thank you." Said Xaria with a smile, perhaps the first true one she had made since she arrived on the island.

* * *

**Confessional: I eat spicy foods for breakfast! Rawr!**

**Oscar: …That felt good.**

**Xaria: **(She appears deep in thought). **Oscar seems to genuinely care about me as a friend … I wish I had friends like that back home.**

* * *

The teams were at their stations in the kitchen and were setting out their ingredients; they had all chosen their dishes and who would cook them but before they began Chef was there to lay down some ground rules for the campers to follow.

"Ok campers! As you know this is my kitchen and it is very special to me!" Barked Chef loudly. "So there are some rules you have to follow while you are here. Rule number one; do not break anything!"

"No promises as I am evil." Sniggered Wallace as he had regained consciousness a few minutes ago.

"Whatever mafia man!" Said Chef as he moved onto the next rule. "Rule number two, no food fights! I nearly lost an eye and an armpit in the great food fight of fifty two and I don't want a reminder! Understand?"

"Sir yes Sir!" Responded the campers automatically.

"Good; and rule number three, no stabbing each other with knives! Its basic kitchen safety, I know some of you wouldn't but some of you I would suspect to do it." Said Chef as his gaze lingered on Kasimar for a moment. "So you know the rules and what you are cooking, you have three hours to cook your food starting … NOW!"

The teams quickly washed their hands and began to get their ingredients out of the crates and onto the work surfaces. Time was of the essence in this challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: Ready, steady, COOK!**

**Gary: The challenge started well with no major casualties or injury; I even noticed Vinnie and Uzuri flirting … though Uzuri's idea of flirting is quite unusual, it wasn't creepy but it was certainly … unique.**

**Barney: Back in the good old days when pirates were a common species they didn't have what we've got now. They relied on their fishing skills and coal stoves that they rarely had so that they wouldn't starve … and it sounds awesome! Arrrrrrrr!**

* * *

Vinnie and Uzuri had cracked the eggs and put them as well as the flour, sugar and butter into the mixing bowl and Uzuri began to stir quite fast.

"Take it easy Uzuri." Called Gary as he heated up a pan of boiling water and readied the noodles.

"Got it Gary." Nodded Uzuri as she continued mixing.

"You seem to be having a good time." Said Vinnie as he put the rubbish they didn't need in the bin.

"I sure am; oh I do hope we get to taste some of these muffins." Said Uzuri as a small blob of the mixture flew onto her cheek she suddenly had a mischievous idea and turned to Vinnie. "Hey Vinnie; can I ask you something?"

"Sure; what is it?" Asked Vinnie as he began to run some hot water in the sink.

"If I had a load of this sticky mixture on my face … would you lick it off?" Asked Uzuri sexily … or as sexily as a short sadistic sweetie could be.

Vinnie's eyes widened and he let out a small 'eeeeep' and pulled his hat over his face to hide his blush.

* * *

**Confessional: That little minx!**

**Vinnie: **(He is blushing and looks embarrassed). **So … was Uzuri being flirty with me or was she just teasing me … I'd say the latter. Also I want to clarify that I wouldn't do something like that! Raw egg is bad for you … but still… **(Vinnie laughs giddily).

**Uzuri: Soooooooo … was I too forward?**

* * *

Gary chuckled at Uzuri's methods of flirting; Uzuri, despite being quite oddball and creepy was fun to have around and in Gary's opinion made people feel better no matter the situation.

"Let's see, the water is beginning to boil so that should give me time to make the sauce." Said Gary as he took out a glass mixing ball and some ketchup, oyster sauce, ginger and garlic.

Gary began to focus on his work; he worked quickly and skillfully as he knew exactly what he was doing. He carefully peeled the ginger and grated off a single teaspoon of it. Gary dropped in into the bowel and binned the left over useless peel.

"Now the garlic and ketchup." Said Gary to himself as he crushed two garlic cloves and squirted in a decent amount of ketchup.

"What are you making Gary?" Asked Tabitha from her work station.

"I'm making the sauce to go with the Chicken Chowmein." Explained Gary. "It may look a little gross if you've never tried it but combined with the noodles and the chicken it tastes like a rainbow as it's that good."

"Sounds good; so how am I doing on the macaroni?" Asked Tabitha as she gestured to the cheese she had been grating and the pan of water that had been set up to boil.

"Not bad." Clapped Gary. "Just make sure you don't burn the macaroni; that is very important."

"Understood." Said Tabitha as she turned her back and went back to grating the cheese.

As Gary went back to work a small paper airplane landed next to him. He looked at it and then in the direction it came from; he saw Raven give him a small wave as she went back to making the egg rice.

Gary checked around to make sure nobody was looking and opened the paper plane.

It said

_Good luck Gary; with some luck neither of us will lose. That sauce you are making looks delicious!_

_An infinity+1 of love_

_Raven_

Gary blushed and, while checking nobody was looking, quickly wrote a reply to the note.

He wrote.

_Well the egg rice you are preparing looks wonderful; if only we were on the same team eh? Good luck and whatever happens … make sure Kasimar and Wallace don't win._

_Even more love than infinity_

_Gary_

Gary folded the paper plane back into shape and, with a quick look around to make sure nobody was watching he tossed it back to the sender.

* * *

**Confessional: Plane post? Why not pigeon post?**

**Gary: I'm going to try and be a good boyfriend; making an effort to compliment Raven and be a gentleman towards her sounds like a good start. Also saying I love her more than infinity sounds like a good tactic.**

**Raven: **(Raven swoons).** I love that boy. **(She giggles).

* * *

Quana and Spider were working on the bolognaise; Quana was stirring the mince while Spider was working on making the sauce. Spider was now wearing a surgeon mask to cover his mouth so that his coughs and sneezes wouldn't infect the food.

"How is the sauce coming along Spider?" Asked Quana as she continued stirring.

"Pretty good so *cough* far; I just need to stir it *cough* some more." Said Spider as he took out a wooden spoon to stir the sauce. "Hopefully I won't screw this up."

"Don't worry about it Spider; I'm sure you'll do just wonderful." Said Quana with a sweet smile. "And good job on bringing that mask; that shows that you think ahead of the game."

"It was really *cough* just in case." Said Spider with a cough. "I didn't think *cough* Chris would reuse any challenges *cough* but I wanted to be ready for anything."

"And you've been excelling at everything so far." Said Quana as she moved the frying pan forwards and backwards a bit to properly cook the mince. "I don't think you've done badly at any challenge."

"You really think *cough* so?" Asked Spider as he looked over to his crush.

"Of course! You earned immunity first challenge, you did your bit in the theme song, you performed decently in human snooker, you found boxes in the Christmas challenge, you faced your fear, you helped in the boat race, you tried your best when we were tortured, you had a really good talent and you did great yesterday." Said Quana with a beaming smile.

"Well I guess when you *sneeze* put it that way." Said Spider with a blush.

* * *

**Confessional: Compliments go a long way in here!**

**Spider: That was really nice** *sneeze*** of Quana; wow, I seem to ***cough* **love her more everyday … if only ***cough* **I was too cowardly to tell her ***cough*** how I feel about her.**

**Quana: I don't know why; but I have to say this, I just have to … Spider looks **_**really**_** cute when he blushes. I don't know what bought that on but something made me want to say it.**

* * *

"Looks like we can pour the sauce on the mince now." Said Quana as she turned the pan handle away from the edge of the stove as per common kitchen safety. "Maybe we should have some green beans in there; they make bolognaise taste even better. Do you see them?"

"Well; the previous pack was *sneeze* four days out of date but I think I *cough* saw another pack of them in *cough* the cupboard below you." Said Spider as he stopped mixing the sauce.

"Thanks Spider." Said Quana as she bent over to get the beans.

It just so happened that at that moment Kasimar was passing with a can of soda; he noticed Quana and a devilish smirk grew on his face.

"_He wouldn't_." Thought Spider in rising anger.

SMACK!

Kasimar slapped Quana on the ass full force. Quana yelped in horror and then she banged her head on the way up. She got to her feet, one hand rubbing the sore spot on her toosh, and gaped at Kasimar in anger and unease.

"Great ass as always." Smirked Kasimar with a nasty chuckle.

"You … monster!" Said Quana angrily yet it came out quiet due to the shock of the moment.

"Well I am monstrously popular with the ladies." Grinned Kasimar. "What's say we ditch the challenge and go behind the-"

KICK!

Spider, fuming red in anger, kicked Kasimar in the balls with all the strength his sick body could muster. The bully let out an extremely high pitched squeal and dropped to his knees in pain.

"Leave my friend *cough* alone you demon *cough* from hell!" Snarled Spider.

"Get back here Kasimar!" Growled Lavender as she grabbed Kasimar by the ear. "Sorry about that; you turn your back for one second eh?"

Lavender dragged Kasimar off as Quana and the rest of Team Puzzle stared at Spider.

"…I don't know what came *cough* over me." Said Spider in embarrassment.

Jimmy and Eleanor began to clap for Spider and Barney gave him a thumbs up and a wink. Quana smiled at Spider warmly and took a step towards him.

"Thank you Spider." Said Quana gratefully. "It's about time someone put that complete monster in his place; he's really starting to seriously make me feel uncomfortable."

"Yeah; *cough* too bad he's *cough* gonna kill me now." Said Spider with a gulp.

Quana silenced Spider with a tight hug.

"Don't worry; you'll be fine. And thank you." Whispered Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: Why not thank me? I allow you to talk in private!**

**Spider: Wow … I've never been ***cough*** hugged before … it felt** *sneeze* **really nice. Kasimar may rip me ***cough*** limb from limb but for Quana; ***cough* **I actually think it would be worth ***splutter* **it.**

**Barney: **(He looks proud). **Atta boy Spider me first mate! Nicely played! Ah; this warms my heart to see Spider learning from me; I wonder how long it'll be before they're officially dating?** (Barney chuckles mischievously).

**Quana: I just don't get it; I keep feeling all pleasantly tingly when Spider does nice things for me, even more so than the other people I'm friends with. Why is that? **(Quana crosses her legs and thinks for a few seconds; suddenly realization seems to hit her and she looks stunned). **Oh my … oh my indeed! Could I … possibly have a crush on Spider?**

**Eleanor: Kasimar is, for lack of a better description, a complete monster. I see no redeeming qualities in him nor do I think he can redeem himself; thus I think what Spider did was quite acceptable. Go Spider!**

* * *

Barney smiled in satisfaction as Spider and Quana went back to work and conversing with each other quite steadily. Barney nodded to himself in satisfaction.

"Yep; looks like it's all going according to plan." Chuckled Barney.

"What's going according to plan?" Asked Jimmy as he stopped finely cutting the chicken and looked towards Barney.

"Nothing you need to worry yourself over me cabin boy." Assured Barney. "Just a side mission I intend to complete."

"Ok; if you say so." Smiled Jimmy as he went back to cutting the chicken.

Barney had speedily cut the peaches and discarded the stones, the pasty was just about ready and he felt he had earned a short break.

"Yaaaaar! I be hungry; I think I'll have a swash buckling snack." Said Barney as he took out a banana and began to peel it. "One skin … Two skin … Three skin … Four-."

"Hey Barney; could you pass me a glass of water; I'm thirsty." Asked Eleanor.

"No problem me heartie." Said Barney as he poured her a glass and handed it to her. "Now where was I? Ah yes; chomp!"

Barney took a bite out of the banana and glanced over at the Team Grenade Station.

"_That scurvy bully could be a wee bit of a problem in the future … a wee bit … well __**that**__ is a bit of an understatement._" Though Barney as he looked over at Kasimar holding a pack of ice on his crotch.

Barney then gazed at Lavender arranging the cheese sheets in the lasagna and grinned to himself.

"_She would be a fair sea queen for me_." Sighed Barney with an invisible blush.

* * *

Lavender had delegated onion cutting duty to Kasimar; maybe the sting of the inions would teach him some manners. That or it would just cause him pain; either of the outcomes was pretty reasonable.

Lavender observed Mable stirring the sauce and she seemed to be doing a pretty good job of it. She shook her head and then blew some loose red bangs out of her face; as she did so she caught Barney watching her. After a brief second of staring at him he tipped his hat and waved. Lavender slowly waved and turned back to her work; unbeknownst to even herself she was blushing a little.

* * *

**Confessional: When a Pirate loves a Tsundere.**

**Lavender: Does Barney fancy me? I doubt it; I'm nothing special, just a normal girl here to win. Though he is funny, nice hair style too, and he's kinda … NO! I'm just feeling distracted because of the pressure of the competition, that's all. **(Lavender blushes).

* * *

"How's the sauce mixture coming along Mable?" Asked Lavender to her best friend.

"Pretty good so far; but it'll need a few more minutes of stirring before it's ready." Said Mable. "Good thing onions don't bother me too much or I'd be in pain, just like Kasimar."

"Shut it!" Snarled Kasimar as he chopped the inions and discarded the skin into the bin. "I don't see why we couldn't have just had a curry."

"A lot of curries have onions you know." Said Lavender dryly.

"Do you hear that?" Asked Kasimar as he put his hand to his ear. "It's the sound of NO ONE CARING!"

"Whatever jerk; just make sure the onions are evenly chopped and then put them with the beef." Said Lavender as she went back to work. "You know; if you put as much effort into being caring and helpful as you do in causing pain and fear then you'd be the best team mate ever."

"Well sorry toots but it ain't gonna happen." Smirked Kasimar. "Just like you are never gonna go anywhere in your worthless life!"

The last thing Kasimar saw coming towards him before he felt immense pain on his head was a frying pan.

* * *

**Confessional: Fact: frying pans are the third best melee weapons behind axes and chainsaws.**

**Kasimar: **(He has a bandage around his head and looks angry). **Who does that **_**girl**_** think she is? Does she **_**know**_** who I am?**

**Lavender: I'm normally calm and collected but Kasimar is chipping away at my patience like a chisel on a rock! I'm voting him off next time no matter what!**

**Mable: **(She is laughing merrily). **Nice one Lavender! You stand up for yourself and show that asshole what for! Still; Wallace isn't much better after that display earlier with the jalapeno.**

**Chris: Shut up you nobody! That jalapeno attack was hilarious! Xaria cried! Isn't that funny?**

* * *

Raven sighed; Wallace hadn't helped her at all since they had began, he had just been writing in his notepad of 'evil' (and I use that term loosely) plans. Raven wasn't so bad at cooking so it wasn't a complete disadvantage but a little help wouldn't have hurt. But it seemed that Wallace had absolutely no intention of helping her.

"I wonder who I can cheat against today." Asked Wallace to himself as he looked to the competition. "After all; as I villain I can't compete if I don't cheat, it's simply not allowed! Mwahahahaha!"

"Could you keep it down?" Asked Raven. "You're giving me a headache with your insane laughter."

"For your information." Said Wallace irritably. "It is evil laughter, not insane laughter and I'd prefer you to refer to it as such."

"Fine; but why do you talk to yourself so much? You do realize I have no interest whatsoever in what you have to say right?" Said Raven as she checked the rice that was frying and at the same time began to scramble the eggs.

"I know; but all of the greatest villains in history talk to themselves." Explained Wallace with a manical cackle. "Albert Wesker, Bowser, Razorbeard, the list goes on. Mwahahahaha!"

Raven sighed as she continued her work. Wallace seemed to realize she was tuning him out and he left, walking past Kasimar and giving him a light pat on the back as he did so.

"I'll be back later." Grunted Kasimar as he poured the inions off the chopping board and into the pan of minced beef. "I … just need a bathroom break."

"Well don't hurry back." Said Mable without even looking up.

Kasimar walked out of the kitchen after Wallace and everyone felt more at ease with the two nastiest campers gone … or at least the two they even knew were nasty as there was one they didn't know who was.

* * *

**Confessional: Bad guy convention commencing.**

**Wallace: My apprentice is going to like my cheating tactic this time; its evil, it's diabolical … and it is star fruit scented! It can't possibly fail! Mwuhahahahaha!**

* * *

Raven watched Kasimar and Wallace leave and turned back to her work; she then checked to make sure nobody else was looking and reached into her pocket and withdrew the paper plane note so that she could read what Gary had wrote.

Raven opened the paper plane and read Gary's response; he heart warmed up considerably as she read and she blushed as she put it back it her pocket. That merited a kiss for sure.

"Hey Raven; can I talk to you for a moment?" Asked Lavender as she walked up.

"Sure Lavender; what's up?" Asked Raven as she took the rice off the heat.

"Well; I'd rather talk in private; I'd rather the other teams didn't hear this." Said Lavender.

"Ok; we can talk outside." Shrugged Raven.

"Good; hey Mable, me and Raven are gonna talk for a minute or two, I'm leaving you to watch over our food if that is ok." Said Lavender.

"No problem Lavender." Said Mable as she stopped stirring the sauce. "I think we can mix the sauce with the mince now."

"Excellent job." Said Lavender with a satisfied nod as she and Raven left the mess hall.

* * *

**Confessional: Time to get busted!**

**Lavender: I wonder how long Gary and Raven have been together. I don't mind at all; it's so sweet! I'll just ask why she hasn't told us; also I *might* ask if Gary is a good kisser. **(Lavender winks to the camera).

* * *

"So; what is it you want to talk about?" Asked Raven curiously as she and Lavender sat a distance from the kitchen.

"Well; I just have one question really … how long have you and Gary been a couple?" Asked Lavender sweetly.

Raven's calm, smiley expression turned into one of embarrassment and panic. She was caught, someone had found out about her and Gary's relationship; what would Lavender do?

Raven gulped and looked nervously towards Lavender.

"How do you know?" Asked Raven nervously.

"I saw you and Gary holding hands on the beach this morning and you had your head rested on his shoulder." Explained Lavender.

"Well; we've been together since yesterday." Said Raven quietly.

"Why are you looking like I'm going to vote you off? I don't mind." Smiled Lavender.

"Really?" Asked Raven in great relief.

"Sure; Gary seems like a pretty solid guy … and it's not like you've chosen to date Wallace or Kasimar."

"Why would I? They're evil." Said Raven with disdain.

"You're telling me." Agreed Lavender. "So … how did you hook up?"

"I fell on him." Giggled Raven. "And … our lips touched. Turns out we had crushes on each other. He's a really good boyfriend; you should have seen what he did this morning when he saw Kasimar harassing me."

"What did he do?" Asked Lavender eagerly.

"He ripped a plank of wood off the dock and smashed it over Kasimar's head." Chuckled Raven.

"Wow; what a guy!" Grinned Lavender before smiling slyly. "So … is he a good kisser?"

Raven's tomato red blush said it all.

* * *

**Confessional: She'd probably give him sixty nine out of ten.**

**Lavender: I really wish I'd have seen Kasimar get whacked over the head; it would make my day. Well; Raven is nice and hooked up … I wonder who's going to hook up next.**

**Raven: I feel much more at ease now that someone else knows; Lavender agreed to not tell anyone else until I'm ready, isn't she a good friend?**

* * *

Wallace and Kasimar were standing outside the mess hall and Wallace was explaining his latest scheme to Kasimar.

"With baited breath I await an explanation for your latest 'evil' scheme." Said Kasimar sarcastically as he leaned against the wall.

"Ok; let me explain it to you." Said Wallace as he took out a star fruit. "Do you know what this is?"

"A star fruit … duh!" Scoffed Kasimar.

"Right you are my loyal lackey; but this isn't just any star fruit; it is the evil, vile and dreaded … tainted star fruit!" Said Wallace finishing with a creepy evil voice. "It is injected with the loathsome tasting essence of dead fish, rotten eggs and moldy bread! Mwahahahahaha!"

"And this is going to help us exactly how?" Asked Kasimar snarkly.

"Simple; we'll leave this out for someone else to find and they will put it in with their dessert which will the be so putrid and _disgusting_ that it will score a big fat zero! Mwahahahahahahaaaaaa!"

"Well … that doesn't seem so evil but I guess it could work." Shrugged Kasimar. "Any other plans you want to tell me about?"

"None at the moment; when the time comes you shall know. "Now let's get back inside before anyone gets suspicious." Said Wallace as he adjusted his sunglasses a little. "I … am … evil! Mwuhahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Evil as a weevil!**

**Wallace: **(He has his arms thrown up and is laughing like a maniac).

**Kasimar: The only reason I'm keeping Wallace around is because he's useful. When that usefulness runs out he's **_**gone**_**. I don't need friends; friends are for wusses!**

* * *

Gary carried a pan of water back towards his cooking area; as he walked past the door some of it spilt but it wouldn't be a problem as long as nobody ran over the puddle. Gary placed the pan on the stove and heated it up. It would be a few minutes before it boiled so he could start working on cooking the chicken. Gary began to slice it into bite size chunks and dropped it into the heated wok. As he began to stir it around so it was equally cooked the door burst open.

"Mwahahaha-whooooa!" Yelled Wallace as he slipped on the puddle of water and sailed speedily down the aisle of the kitchen and slammed into Gary's stove. As Wallace lay in a daze Gary glanced at him briefly before he continued stirring.

"Please do watch where you are going." Said Gary simply. "Some of us actually care about winning."

Wallace groaned as he got up; he looked around and saw that his tainted star fruit had disappeared; he realized it must have landed next to someone's work space. Wallace grinned evilly and pinched his moustache a little; like domino's his evil plan was falling together.

Wallace's star fruit had flew in the air and had gone unnoticed as it lay in a pile of fruit; one thing was for certain, it was going to ruin one of the meals being prepared.

* * *

Oscar and Xaria were working on their dessert. It was coming along pretty well so far; the fruit was being sliced, the mango juice was ready and it smelt mouth watering and very tropical.

"I think everything is coming along nicely." Said Oscar as he moved on from chopping the pineapple and began to work on the bananas. "Its like Geoff said last season, you're good in the kitchen … though I have the common sense to not compare you to someone's allegedly hot mum."

Xaria chuckled for a moment as she worked on chopping the star fruit as carefully as possible.

"I know what you mean; Geoff, what is there to say about him? Not the sharpest tool in the shed if that's how the saying goes, well, as long as he thinks with his heart and not his head right?"

"True." Smirked Oscar. "You know; you seem a lot more cheerful than you were at the beginning of the competition, any particular reason?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Sneered Kasimar as he stepped behind them. "Because she's had a large number of enjoyable bathroom breaks! Yahaha!"

Oscar picked up a saucepan and beaned Kasimar over the head with it. Kasimar staggered and collapsed unconscious.

"Thanks Oscar." Said Xaria with a small grumble as she peeled and sliced a particularly tough star fruit. "That creep is _really _starting to get on my nerves."

"You and both my friend." Said Oscar as he glanced down at the unconscious big bad bully. "Think we should move him?"

"…Naw. I say we leave him; if we're lucky someone might step on him." Smirked Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: If only they knew…**

**Xaria: While I dislike Kasimar and Wallace very much I think I dislike wallace even more after this morning. Still; is it wrong to enjoy seeing Kasimar get small doses of karma?**

* * *

"The muffins are in the oven Gary." Said Vinnie a few minutes later as he and Uzuri began to start on the washing up with him on drying duty.

"Good job Vinnie." Said Gary as be added the noodles and peppers to the wok. "Make sure when serving time comes that you select the best muffin to give to Chris."

"Understood." Said Vinnie as he began to dry a mixing bowl Uzuri handed him.

"So Vinnie; why did you join the show?" Asked Uzuri as she started washing the whisk.

"To show you can go far even if you don't have both arms." Replied Vinnie as he finished drying the mixing bowl. "Also because I could potentially get a new arm with a million dollars; despite being cool a metal arm is kind of annoying after a while. So; any reason you joined?"

"To burn exotic ants, have a great summer …and to make some friends." Said Uzuri, the last one she said with a slightly sad sigh. "I'm not sure what I would do with the prize … maybe I could go backstage at the next SAW première."

"You sure like horror movies don't you?" Said Vinnie with a smile. "I don't mind them as long as they aren't too gory. I prefer comedies … and musicals."

Uzuri raised an eyebrow at this information and giggled girlishly.

"Musicals you say? Tell me more." Smiled Uzuri as sweetly as always.

* * *

**Confessional: In here it is all singing and all dancing!**

**Vinnie: Laugh if you want; but I like singing, granted that I seriously can't sing but some of the songs in musicals are pretty good … though I do NOT like high school musical … its just a little, you know, stupid.**

**Uzuri: Musicals sound fun; Hmmmm, maybe they should make a SAW musical; it would be all screaming and all dancing! Teehee!**

* * *

Barney had finished making the pasty and filling for his pie. As he gazed at it briefly it looked like a regular pie except it was not cooked yet. Barney put on oven gloves and put his pasty dessert into the oven and looked at the recipe.

"Hmmm; cook pie for twenty minutes at six hundred degrees … naw! I have a better idea!" Said Barney with an all too familiar genki grin. "If it take twenty minutes at six hundred degrees then it must surely take one minute at twelve thousand degrees. It's just common sense after all."

Barney turned the oven temperature to maximum and began to whistle a tune with his hands in his pockets. He saw Lavender having a drink of orange juice and waved.

"Ahoy Lavender." Smiled Barney. "What's cooking doc?"

"Well; that was a pretty bad joke." Sighed Lavender in amusement. "How are you doing Barney? Having fun?"

"Yep!" Nodded Barney as he scratched an itch on his ponytail a little. "I'm just cooking a peach pie; it should be done very shortly."

"Well I hope you like second place because Team Grenade is coming first today." Said Lavender with a playful smirk.

"We shall see my red headed mermaid, we shall see." Teased Barney.

"Are you flirting with me?" Asked Lavender with a coy look.

"Maybe I am and maybe I'm not; it depends, do you _want_ me to be?" Said Barney with a chuckle.

"…You really are an oddball and … what's that smell?" Asked Lavender before noticing smoke coming from the oven. "Yikes! What temperature did you set it to?"

"Twelev thousand degrees, it was pure logic you see." Shrugged Barney.

"Ovens don't work that way." Gulped Lavender as she took a few steps back.

"Looks like it should be done." Said Barney as he put on oven gloves again and knelt down to the oven.

BOOM!

At that moment the oven exploded which knocked Barney onto his back and covered all of his front in black soot and smoke. He coughed twice and shrugged as he knelt back down to the remains of what was once an oven. When he came up he was holding a pie that looked perfect; just the right flakiness, great temperature, right size and perfectly round. Lavender gaped as Barney picked a finger a raised it and made a 'tsss' sound.

"As I said … logic." Smirked Barney with a genki chuckle at the look on Lavenders face.

* * *

**Confessional: Oven logic that actually worked?**

**Barney: I think I've netted us at least an eight with that; the look on Lavenders face … funny AND cute as a button! Yohohoho! …Wait; did I say that out loud? Oh minnows!**

**Lavender: Normally I would question how that was even possible … but as I've got to know barney I've learnt he can do the strangest things … what a guy! **(She giggles and blushes a little before going wide eyed). **I did **_**not**_** just do that.**

* * *

"Good job Barney." Said Quana with admiration as he set down the pie on the undamaged work surface next to the oven wreckage. "But won't Chef be mad about that?"

"If it broke while cooking a pie it was probably on its way to the scrap yard anyway me heartie." Shrugged Barney. "It looks like its time to wash up my equipment; if you need me I'll be mingling by the sink."

As Barney began to wash up Spider chuckled with a sick sniffle and turned to Quana while stirring the sauce with the meat.

"That's our Barney. Always doing *cough* what we least expect." Said Spider in amusement. "I *cough* hope Chef Hatchet won't be *sneeze* too angry about the oven."

"I wouldn't worry." Giggled Quana which made Spider's stomach do a flip flop. "I don't think anything can keep Barney down, he's going to make some girl happy indeed though I'm not sure if he's the type to be interested in love."

"I wouldn't be so *cough* sure." Said Spider as he stirred the bolognaise on the electric stove.

"Why not?" Asked Quana.

"Well; he's told me before *cough* that he's an expert on love and *cough* is willing to help people *cough* get together." Explained Spider half truthfully.

"Well; as you've already said; that's our Barney!" Smiled Quana. "And the bolognaise and spaghetti look about ready; lets get it into a serving bowl, the fancier the better as this IS Chris Maclean we are talking about."

"May as well bring out *sneeze* a solid gold plate embedded *cough* with rubies then." Joked Spider.

Quana laughed and soon Spider did as well; albeit with a few coughs but it was laughter all the same.

* * *

**Confessional: Laughter makes the world go round.**

**Spider: This might just be the ***cough* **dorkiest thing I've ever said … but ***big sneeze* **in the moments I'm with Quana ***cough* **my life becomes so clear … I'm ***cough* **such a nerdy geek.** (Spider sighs and manages a small chuckle).

* * *

Mable had finished the sauce to go with the lasagna; it, along with the cheese sheets and the meat, was in the oven proof dish and it was ready for cooking. Mable smiled to herself in satisfaction at her work.

"Looks great." She said with a smile. "A few too many carbs and calories to be truly perfect … but a very good meal all the same. Boy; all this cooking is making me hungry."

"Me too." Said Lavender with a little drool evident at the corner of her mouth. "I could go for a Triple Decker cheeseburger, large fries and a diet coke about now."

"Well if we win the reward might be a five star meal." Said Mable as she put on a pair of Chef Hatchet's pink oven gloves and put the lasagna into the oven. "That should be done in a while so what do we do now?"

"Just stand around really; we can't leave the food unattended, the other teams might try and cheat." Said Lavender.

"I think Wallace is the only one who cheats and even he hasn't done anything yet; well, nothing that I know of anyway." Said Mable as she briefly glanced at Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional: I know something you don't know!**

**Mable: I don't trust Wallace; he's cheated in every challenge so far and he's a bit nuts. I'm wondering if he is only being a harmless villain to lull us into a false sense of security so he can do something really dastardly.**

* * *

As Mable and Lavender continued to converse they were interrupted by a wolf whistle from the floor; Kasimar has regained consciousness and seemed to have moved from his position by Oscar and Xaria and was now … looking up Lavenders skirt.

"Nice thong babe." Smirked Kasimar shamelessly. "Not as good a bumper thumper as Quana but-."

BAM!

Lavender, blushing bright red with anger and embarrassment, kicked Kasimar hard in the head and he was knocked back into the hazy realm of unconsciousness.

"That pervert!" Snarled Lavender. "Has he no shame? No remorse? No common decency? So far he's been hitting on Quana, Raven and now me! Grrrrrrrr!"

Lavender took a few deep breathes and relaxed.

"I shouldn't get so angry; I've heard its bad for ones blood pressure." Said Lavender as she calmed down.

"That is true." Confirmed Mable. "But at least you always give Kasimar what he deserves right?"

* * *

**Confessional: Where my shame is that I have no shame.**

**Lavender: How dare that creep take such a naughty peek! That is so … how dare he!**

**Tabitha: Hmmm; the way Kasimar causes so much trouble, survives so many injuries and still lasts in the competition is impressive … after the merge, which I **_**will**_** get to … he could be a very useful ally.**

**Barney: Kasimar is on my list now! One rule of relationships is that you must no under any circumstances look up a girl's skirt! Poor Lavender; like a damsel in distress and as cute as one too yaaaar! **(Barney blinks and groans). **Why did I just say that?**

* * *

Xaria smirked at Kasimar being knocked out again and laughed quietly.

"Karma; it is such a truly wonderful thing." Said Xaria as Kasimar lay in a heap.

"We should probably move him somewhere do he doesn't try _that_ again." said Oscar as he glared at the bully. "I'll be back in a moment."

Oscar left his completed work station and picked Kasimar up over his head and carried him out of the kitchens. Xaria inwardly laughed at Kasimar's misfortune.

"_I'm hating Kasimar more and more_." Thought Xaria angrily before smiling. "_And yet I'm liking Oscar more and more … as a friend of course_."

Outside the mess hall Oscar tossed Kasimar roughly onto the hard ground and dusted off his hands.

"With luck he'll get rained on." Wished Oscar. "Maybe someday we could vote him off … yet after what Wallace did … I'm just not sure."

* * *

**Confessional: Where rain never gets you!**

**Kasimar: When I came back to consciousness I was outside; how in the hell did I get out there?**

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor had now finished cooking the chicken and sweet corn soup; it had taken a while as neither of them had made it before, but despite this they had pulled it off. Currently they were washing the last of the dishes as Barney had taken a break so he could set their side of the table with decorations. Eleanor was washing them and Jimmy was drying them as well as putting them back in the correct places.

"How do you think we'll do Jimmy?" Asked Eleanor as she scrubbed a few spoons.

"While overconfidence is a major cause of losing; I'd say we have a great chance of coming second." Smiled Jimmy. "I somehow think Team Grenade will lose with all of Wallace and Kasimar's bad karma hanging above them like a cloud."

"Well; hopefully they'll lose … I mean, most of them are my friends besides the obvious exceptions." Said Eleanor as she cleaned a plate. "And they've got seven of their original eight members still here … if they keep winning our team could be in trouble."

"Well; if I lose I have no regrets." Shrugged Jimmy with his cheerful childlike smile still on his face. "I've had a blast so far; though I would like to win, simply to show that big power can come in small packages or something like that."

"I can see you going far Jimmy." Said Eleanor with a sweet smile. "You're really nice and friendly and you've not made any enemies so far."

"Well Kasimar certainly doesn't like me." Said Jimmy before looking around. "Speak of the devil; where is he anyway?"

"I think I saw Oscar carrying him outside a few minutes ago; he was unconscious you see." Explained Eleanor with a smirk. "Maybe he'll get rained on."

"Not only that but also rain is good for the plants and animals as well." Smiled Jimmy. "And what was once Barney's oven could use some water … it looks charbroiled."

Both kids glanced over at the broken over; it was heavily blacked and looked like something you would find in the smelting grounds in a scrap yard.

"What I find really odd is that Barney's questionable logic actually worked." Said Eleanor with a puzzled eyebrow lift. "How does he do it?"

"He reminds me of Willy Wonka." Said Jimmy with a laugh. "Minus the chocolate factory and adding the pirate get up."

* * *

**Confessional: Wonka the Plonker!**

**Jimmy: I quite enjoy Roald Dahl's works; Charlie and the Chocolate factory was the best; I really would have liked to taste the marshmallow pillows and everlasting gobstoppers. Oh well; I can always dream.**

* * *

"So; if we do end up losing then who would you vote for; not me right?" Said Eleanor as she finished washing the last plate and handed it to Jimmy to dry.

"I really don't know." Said Jimmy while looking torn. "Not you because you're my best friend here. Not Spider because he is such a nice guy, not Barney either because he's so much fun and he's like the older brother I never had in a way … and not Quana, she's just so nice, caring and a valuable team mate. To be honest … I'd sooner vote for myself than any of you."

"Wow; you think that highly of us?" Asked Eleanor with a smile.

"I think highly of all my friends." Said Jimmy as he put the last plate in the cupboard. "I'm pretty social back home."

"I can tell; you have a lot of funny stories to say." Giggled Eleanor.

"That's nothing; I haven't even told anyone about the time we went fishing in the lake last summer and lost our oars so we were stuck out there for three hours. I'll tell you if you want."

"Sounds like quite a shenanigan." Smiled Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: What a story!**

**Eleanor: **(She looks amused). **Whoa; I had no idea you could do **_**that**_** with a pocket protector or make a sail from Jimmy's hat … sounds like an interesting neighborhood indeed.**

**Jimmy: After that time we all agreed to never go fishing in a sail boar again … that or just bring a spare few sets of oars.**

* * *

Half an hour later Chris sounded an air horn from his table in the canteen.

"Ok not as hot or special as me campers; time to bring out your meals!" Said Chris as he put on a napkin around his neck and took hold of a knife and fork. "And no cursed Tiki Idols this time ok? Now … bring out the starters!"

Tabitha walked out with a dish of macaroni cheese with crispy Parmesan on top. Behind her came Raven carefully carrying a bowl of egg fried rice. Last in line was Eleanor holding a bowl of warm chicken and sweet corn soup. The three girls placed the bowls in front of Chris as their team mates listened from the kitchen.

* * *

**Confessional: Judging time.**

**Tabitha: I think I did alright; Gary spotted no flaws in the meal and also said it smelt fine. I removed a single tube of Macaroni and he says it tastes good as well. Looks like this should be a winning dish.**

**Wallace: I wonder which dish is going to be ruined. Ooooh! The suspense is so evil! Mwuhahahahaha! **

* * *

Chris first tried Raven's egg fried rice. He got a fork full and tasted it.

"Hmmm." Said Chris as he swallowed before smiling. "This is why girls should stay in the kitchen … that was great! I give Team Grenade eight points; I like the overall taste and texture pus the smell really reminds me of hair gel and I don't know why."

"Thanks … I think." Said Raven dryly as while she had scored decently Chris had said a very sexist remark indeed.

Chris tried Tabitha's meal next; he forked a few tubes and some of the cheesy sauce. He put it in his mouth and chewed. Instantly he smiled and swallowed a few seconds later.

"Excellent! I have a sudden liking for Macaroni; great taste, very cheesy … and almost as perfect as me. I give it a well deserved nine." Said Chris with an unfathomably rare smile.

Tabitha falsely smiled and took a bow.

"Thank you very much Chris." Said Tabitha modestly.

Chris then turned to the Chicken and sweet corn soup; he got a spoon of it ready and tasted it. He smiled and swallowed before stating his opinion.

"Not bad; I could taste the chicken; and I liked the little bits of sweet corn skin floating around in there, very textured. I give it … eight points."

Eleanor smiled at the good score and looked content.

"Thanks Chris; that's unusually nice of you."

"You're welcome … now get out of my sight and make room for the main course you girls!" Snapped Chris as he banged his knife and fork on the table.

The three girls frowned and went back to the kitchen.

* * *

**Confessional: Mood swing much?**

**Eleanor: And with that all thankfulness to Chris vanished; that wasn't nice! He could have at least said please. **

**Chris: Saying please is for losers!**

* * *

The main courses were then carried out; Gary held a bowl of Chicken Chowmein high and carefully while behind him came Lavender with a dish of lasagna that looked highly appetizing. The last one to exit the kitchen was Quana with a bowl of Spaghetti Bolognaise. The dishes were placed before Chris as the starters were moved to the side by interns.

"These all look pretty good." Said Chris. "I think I'll try the bolognaise first."

Chris twirled some spaghetti on his fork and forked a little meat and ate it. He looked satisfied with the taste and after a few moments of chewing he swallowed.

"Not bad; very juicy and meaty. The sauce is well done … I give you eight points for this.

Quana smiled and as she went back to the kitchen she high fived Spider. Barney was right; they really worked well together.

Chris then tasted the lasagna; he thoughtfully chewed it for a while and after he swallowed it he stated his opinion.

"Pretty nice; even better than the bolognaise … though its probably because you had Kasimar helping you." Smirked Chris. "I give you nine points. And where IS Kasimar anyway?"

At that moment the doors of the mess hall slammed open and Kasimar walked in looking a little dirty.

"Who left me out there?" Asked Kasimar angrily. "I'll destroy them!"

Oscar just smirked and winked to Xaria who nodded and stayed silent. Kasimar stormed into the kitchen and spat on the floor in anger.

"Well; looks like that leaves Gary's Chicken Chowmein; will the Chef live up to his stereotype?"

Chris slowly forked some noodles, a piece of chicken and a red pepper strip and put them in his mouth. Instantly his eyes widened and he smiled in delight; once he swallowed he gave the thumbs up.

"I can't find any flaw with that; good job Gary, even if cooking is a girl's subject, Haha!" Smirked Chris backhandedly. "You've earned a perfect ten."

Gary looked satisfied if not a little offended as he walked back to the kitchen; his team congratulated him and once they looked away he winked at Raven.

* * *

**Confessional: Dessert time!**

**Gary: That went well; Tabitha got a nine and I got a perfect ten. Now we just have to hope Vinnie and Uzuri do just as well with the blueberry muffins … and I have faith in them that they will. With the challenge done I can now cook something for Raven; if anyone asks I'll just say I'm making something for myself.**

**Spider: So far so ***cough* **good. I just hope ***cough* **Barney's pie can get a good score ***sneeze* **as well.**

**Raven: Gary is so good at cooking; but he is not just a chef … he's my chef.**

**Barney: Time to see if my oven logic will pay off.**

**Vinnie: I have a good feeling about this; Uzuri really knew what she was doing when she made the cakes with me; lets hope they get a good score because if we lose again then we're in trouble.**

* * *

Vinnie and Uzuri came out with a single blueberry muffin; the best one that they had cooked. Barney came out holding a pie and looked genki and confident. Last to come out was Oscar carrying a bowl of tropical fruit salad; Xaria followed behind him with her hands in her pockets. Now that it was down to the final course all the campers exited the kitchen to see who would win.

Chris looked at the desserts in front of him and rubbed his hands eagerly.

"Ok campers; it's the final course; the team with the least points at the end of this one are the losers and must vote someone off … so no pressure. Haha." Smirked Chris. "The scores so far are Team Grenade with seventeen points, Team Puzzle with sixteen points and Team Jungle with nineteen points; but there is still no guaranteed winner. First up … Team Puzzle with Barney's pie.

Chris cut a small slice of the peach pie and took a bite and smiled happily.

"Peaches tastes nice … and so does this pie, I give it a nine." Said Chris as he finished off the slice.

"But they blew up an oven." Pointed out Kasimar with a chuckle.

"Did they? Hmmm … that knocks it down to eight." Said Chris. "So Team Puzzle finishes with twenty four points."

Kasimar sneered at team Puzzle smugly while they returned his gaze with angry glares.

* * *

**Confessional: Dirty tactics I do think so.**

**Eleanor: Why did he do that? What was the point? Sure Barney may have caused damage but Kasimar didn't need to sneer at us! Jerk!**

* * *

Chris moved on to the muffin and took off the wrapper; he took a bite and smiled as he chewed the tasty muffin.

"Wow; not bad." Smiled Chris as he tossed the rest of the muffin onto the floor. "Tastes of vanilla and blueberries very much; it has a great rise and I like the crispiness of the top of it. I give it … eight points which gives Team Jungle a score of twenty seven and guaranteed safety from tonight's vote and a possible tie for first place with Team Grenade.

Team Jungle cheered; they had escaped a vote off; that was great! And from within the kitchen Gary let out a content smile.

"Excellent; just excellent." Smiled Gary.

* * *

**Confessional: Woohoo!**

**Uzuri: Yay! All four of us are here for another day, I hope we keep winning! This calls for a celebration … doughnuts! Teehee!**

* * *

Chris moved the fruit salad in front of him and looked upon it.

"This looks like it could easily guarantee you 'grenadiers' safety … but will it get a nine or a ten?

Chris jabbed a piece of star fruit with his fork and smiled.

"Maybe I'll give you a bonus point for including star fruit; its my favorite of all fruit." Smiled Chris as he raised his fork close to his mouth.

Then he inserted the star fruit and chewed. Instantly his face contorted and he turned green and coughed.

"Oh my god!" Gagged Chris in disgust as he ran over to the window and puked hard.

"This can't be good." Gulped Mable.

Chris turned back and wiped the excess vomit off his mouth and glared at Team Grenade.

"Are you retards trying to poison me? I give you a big fat ZERO!" Screamed Chris in anger. "It wasn't anything like a star fruit! It tasted like rotten egg, dead fish and moldy bread! Blech!"

Kasimar thought for a moment and instantly realized what had happened and knew how to shift attention away from himself.

"Hey Wallace." Said Kasimar to his partner in crime. "Wasn't that what that tainted star fruit of yours tasted like?"

Wallace seemed to realize what had happened as well.

"Oh crap." Gulped Wallace with wide eyes behind his shades.

The other five members of Team Grenade glared at Wallace and Kasimar, mostly the former and Oscar glared evilly.

"Xaria; grab some of that so called tainted star fruit! I'll hold him down!" Smirked Oscar.

"Right away Oscar." Cackled Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: Humiliation Conga coming up!**

**Kasimar: Seeing Wallace get tortured? Eh, tragic … not! It was hilarious! Yahahahaha!**

**Raven: **(Smirking). **Oh this ought to be good!**

* * *

Wallace tried to run but Oscar caught up in an instant and held him down tightly; no matter how much Wallace struggled he couldn't escape. Xaria walked over slowly with a piece of the tainted star fruit on a fork and cackled again.

"Saw 'ah' please." Smirked Xaria in a doctor impersonation.

"No! Help!" Yelled Wallace as Xaria knelt down and forced his mouth open.

"Well; this is good, dinner and a show." Smirked Gary as he watched from the doorway of the kitchen having heard the commotion.

Xaria dangled the tainted star fruit chunk above Wallace's forced open mouth and dropped it in. and then clamped his mouth shut.

"Enjoying your din dins are you?" Asked Xaria with a smirk.

Wallace instinctively chewed beyond his control and accidently swallow the tainted fruit. He began to cough, gag and turn green.

Oscar released his hold and Wallace ran over to the window and puked chunks with many coughs and gags.

Everyone else besides Kasimar applauded the unlikely duo as Oscar took a bow.

"No thanks necessary; I'm glad you enjoyed the show." Smiled Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: Humiliation Conga finished … for now.**

**Mable: Who knew something healthy could be so vile? But it sure was hilarious! Hahehuhahehu! **

**Uzuri: Teehee! That was funny! Wallace was such a meanie, he deserved that! What a great day! Teehee!**

**Lavender: I'm going to remember that forever; I hope that ends up on YouTube!**

**Barney: **(He is laughing in complete hysterics and bangs the wall with his fist in laughter). **Yohohohohohohoho! **

* * *

While Wallace puked Chris cleared his throat and got the attention back no him, just how he liked it.

"Well then; with that performance its clear to see that Team Grenade's winning streak has come to an end. You're going to be voting someone off tonight. Sucks to be you! Haha!"

Team Grenade frowned but Mable and Lavender glared evilly at Kasimar.

"Team Puzzle is second so no prize and no vote off … and for the first time in a while Team Jungle have finished in first place! Today your prize is a good one; it is …

…

…

…

…

A completely free buffet meal at any restaurant of the Dragon Inn chain!"

Team Jungle cheered and high fived. From within the kitchen Gary heard the prize and smiled; it sounded like a great place for a first date with Raven.

"I'll see you losers later." Said Chris as he got to his feet. "I'm going to get this awful taste out of my mouth. Blech!"

Chris left out the door and Lavender turned to Kasimar.

"Wallace may have cost us the challenge but you are the worst person here; your time on Wawanakwa in numbered!" Grinned Lavender victoriously.

"Too right." Agreed Mable. "You've crossed the line more times than I thought was possible."

"Whatever douche nozzles; I'm outta here." Grunted Kasimar as he left the mess hall for a lie down.

"Oh my god!" Groaned Wallace as he puked some more.

* * *

About an hour later a short while before the ceremony Gary was cooking in the mess hall; Chef didn't mind him being in the kitchen at all and saw no problem with allowing him to cook something for Raven as due to being co host Chef knew a lot of what went on behind the scenes.

Currently Gary was putting the finishing touches on some rich chocolate peppermint creams; Raven had told him she liked them so Gary had decided to cook them for her. It wasn't that hard at all even though he hadn't cooked them before.

"And now for the finishing touch." Said gary as he took out a tray of ruby red rose petals and placed one on each chocolate sweetie, sticking them on with melted white chocolate. "Perfect."

"Hi Gary!" Chirped Uzuri happily as she entered the kitchen. "Wow! Something smells _really_ good!"

"Thanks; its these chocolate peppermint creams I'm making." Explained Gary. "I was making them as a reward for myself due to getting a perfect ten in the challenge today."

"Can I have one?" Asked Uzuri sweetly.

"Well I was actually going to-." Gary trailed off as Uzuri trembled her lip and gave him 'the puppy look'. "Ok; fine, take one if you want. you could be really dangerous if you had any meanness in you, that face can make anyone do anything you want."

After Uzuri took one of the chocolate goodies Gary picked up the tray and began to leave the mess hall to go to where he and Raven had arranged to meet.

"Where are you going Gary?" Asked Uzuri.

"I'm just taking these back to my cabin; I guess I could give Vinnie and Tabitha some as well." Fibbed Gary as he wanted his relationship to remain a secret for now. "What are you doing in here anyway?"

"I'm going to make some doughnuts." Smiled Uzuri as she began to set up the ingredients and equipment. "Because as a rule they are the best snack to celebrate a victory with."

* * *

Wallace and Kasimar were standing around camp conversing; it was nearly time for the ceremony and it was almost certain one of them would be going.

"Ok my loyal lackey." Said Wallace as he paced in front of Kasimar. "We've got targets on our backs tonight but I have an idea on how we could both stay."

"I'm listening." Said Kasimar with a bored expression.

"We shall both vote for Oscar; he is the biggest threat overall and as the others are mostly smart they would vote for him so he won't be a problem at the merge." Smirked Wallace. "Thus we both vote for him and we are both safe."

"Sounds workable." Said Kasimar while not bothering to point out the seven or so holes he saw in the plan. "So; shall we go cast our votes?"

"Yes we shall; time for evil to triumph once again. Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he took out his remote and pressed a button which made his theme music play once again.

* * *

**Confessional: I wonder if we'll ever find out where the music comes from.**

**Lavender: This is it! Its time for Kasimar to walk the dock of shame; after all he has done I think it is time for his karma. I vote Kasimar.**

**Mable: After all the nasty things he has done it is only common sense to vote for Kasimar; I hope the boat sinks while you are one it!**

**Oscar: I was thinking of voting for Kasimar, I do hate him a lot after all … but after what Wallace did to Xaria this morning … I am changing my mind just this once and am voting for Wallace. I don't know why but I don't like seeing Xaria upset like she was.**

**Xaria: I vote Wallace; its been a pleasure knowing you … oh wait, it hasn't been, good riddance!**

**Wallace: Goodbye Oscar! You were a worthy foe but nobody can defeat the forces of evil! Mwuhahahahahahahahaha!**

**Kasimar: I'm not voting for Oscar at all; he may be a threat but I'm sure I could cause him more suffering, I know someone else who I would rather see gone, I vote for **(Static cuts him off).

* * *

Team Grenade were sitting around the warm fire in the Bonfire Ceremony pit; a place they hadn't seen in quite a while. Their winning streak had ended and by the next day only six of them would be left. Some of them glared at Kasimar, others glared at Wallace. Either way you looked at the situation it seemed that a villain was getting the boot tonight.

Chris arrived at the Bonfire pit with a tray of six marshmallows and put the tray down on the barrel as per every ceremony. He stood silently for a few moments during which time the only sound was the crackling of the fire; after a few seconds more he spoke.

"Well Team Grenade; welcome back. It is time for your second Bonfire Ceremony. I thought all seven of you would make the merge … but I guess I was wrong. When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The camper who _does not_ receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers and get the flippin hell off and away from this Island. That means you are out … and you can't come back … ever."

"Feeling worried Kasimar?" Asked Mable sweetly and mockingly.

"Shut up freak hair!" Grunted Kasimar as he sat on a stump next to Wallace and crossed his arms confidently.

"The first marshmallow of the evening goes to … Mable."

"Yes!" Smiled Mable as she got up from her log and took her marshmallow. "Ew; so sugary, too much sugar."

"The second marshmallow of the evening goes to … Xaria."

Xaria got off the log she was sitting on and collected her tasty treat of safety.

"Lavender"

"Raven."

"Oscar."

Only Wallace and Kasimar were left without a marshmallow; Wallace blinked behind his shades and gulped just a little but he didn't look any less determined. Kasimar however just put his hands on his knees and looked at the marshmallow with a look of confidence.

"Kasimar … Wallace … This is the final marshmallow of the Bonfire Ceremony. The person who does not get this is eliminated and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers and can't ever come back ever. I personally feel this is extremely wrong for it to have to come down to a pair of such evil ratings generators … but it must be done. The final marshmallow of the evening goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Kasimar."

Kasimar laughed in triumph as he arose from his log and claimed the last symbol of safety. Wallace was stunned while Lavender and Mable were gob smacked.

"How in the world-." Began Lavender.

"-Did he manage to survive?" Finished Mable.

"I bet you thought you had gotten rid of me right?" Smirked Kasimar as he swallowed his marshmallow. "Well I'm afraid you've failed once again. It looks like I'll be sticking around for a while longer; I just had to pull a little bit of … betrayal."

Wallace's brain processed this information and suddenly realization hit him and he gaped and growled.

"You betrayed me?" Asked Wallace in a light angry voice.

"Well duh." Scoffed Kasimar. "It was obvious Oscar wasn't going considering how well liked he is. I voted for you as I needed to ensure my safety. And let me tell you something; you really did teach me a lot of good ways of evil, but there was one thing you didn't teach me, know what it was?"

Wallace was silent in shock so Kasimar continued.

"It was betrayal; any true villain, which you are not, would betray his friends to save himself. To be honest I never had any loyalty to you in the first place; face it Wallace … I've been using you. Have a good time at the playa, ta ta."

Kasimar left the Bonfire Ceremony area to go to bed feeling content while Wallace snarled in anger.

"That demon." Said Wallace in disgust.

"Well; we may not have got rid of Kasimar … but its a start." Shrugged Lavender as she left for bed.

Wallace nodded and seemed to accept his fate. Before he left he had one last thing to say.

"You haven't heard the last of The Wallace! Mwuhahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically as he took out his remote and pressed a button which activated his theme music. As it played Wallace ran down to the dock of shame cackling madly; unfortunately for him he wasn't looking where he was going properly and he tripped over a hole where a plank of wood was missing and he tripped over and smacked onto the dock.

"Curses! Foiled by gravity." Said Wallace with a grumble as he boarded the boat of losers which drove away from the island which had now lost a large percent of its evilness.

* * *

As the boat of losers and Wallace disappeared into the horizon Chris walked onto the dock and smiled for the camera.

"I bet you didn't see that coming right? Wallace is gone and Team grenades winning streak is over; and yet there are still a lot of questions to ask. How long will Kasimar last now that he is the main target of his team? Will Chef be angry that one of his ovens blew up? And is Quana _actually_ falling for _Spider_ of all people? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

Votes

Kasimar: Wallace

Lavender: Kasimar

Mable: Kasimar

Xaria: Wallace

Oscar: Wallace

Raven: Wallace

Wallace: Oscar

Wallace- 4 votes

Kasimar- 2 votes

Oscar- 1 vote

Voted Off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace.

* * *

Did any of you see that coming? Wallace is gone and with him his evil laughter and theme music. I know some of you liked Wallace so let me explain something. While I like Wallace a great deal more than Kasimar Wallace had to go because Kasimar is VITAL to the plot. But do not worry because when the time comes Kasimar will get _**EVERYTHING**_he deserves, you have my word.

Next time: Avada Kedarva, Wingardium Leviosa, Expecto Patronum.


	23. Day 11, Part 1, yer a wizard Harry

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the season that must never be named. they belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that apear in this sotry so please do not steal them.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains love, implied making out, a sadistic and slightlyinsane host, a nasty bully, smoking and a pep talk. you have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven** Vinnie Uzuri and the secret couple which I shall noe reveal. it is

.

.

.

.

.

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OscarxXaria.

**Note: **Here it is; chapter 23. This episode is going to be epic; next chapter especially. Some future thing are foreshadowed in this challenge so try to spot them.

Time to hit the road!

* * *

The days were really starting to go by on Wawanakwa; it was now day eleven of Total Drama Letterz and so far eleven campers of many diverse personalities and backgrounds had been voted off. Chris stood on the dock of shame and waved to the camera; for some reason he was now wearing a wizard hat. He waved to the camera and began to daily recap.

"Abra Cadabra! Haha! Last time on Total Drama Letterz." Began Chris while squiggling his fingers. "Our tenth day got our contestants hot under the color and made them put their kitchen prowess to the ultimate test because their challenge was cooking a meal for me and we all know I have god like refined tastes so it would be a challenge to satisfy me."

"The three teams choose their foods, which were quite diverse, and began to cook. It was clear that some of them either had no cooking experience or just couldn't be bothered as bad guy Wallace ditched Raven and decided to cheat once more! Haha! He's a really funny guy; especially when he shoved a raw jalapeño in Xaria's mouth … and she cried! Haha!"

"As the cooking continued we saw the tensions heat up like an oven. Kasimar put the moves on Quana again, smacking her on the butt once more. He got a kick to the balls for his troubles courtesy of Spider. The two bonded and much to my surprise and disappointment is actually looks like Quana is falling for Spider. Well; it shows that Barney is doing _something_ right."

"Lavender got Raven away from the others and told her that she knew about her and Gary's secret relationship. And she didn't even mind … lame! Where is the yelling and screaming from last season? Well, it got better as a short while later Kasimar made an … 'inappropriate' comment about Xaria and got whacked over the head with a pan by Oscar. When he regained consciousness he took the opportunity to have a naughty peak up Lavenders skirt! Haha! Lucky guy!"

"Wallace tried to put his secret weapon, a tainted star fruit, into effect but slipped on spilt water and crashed into an oven. The star fruit landed elsewhere next to one of the dishes … this would come into play later. While Wallace lay dazed Barney tried some oven logic to cook a pie quickly and somehow it worked; though it did blow up the oven in the process. That guy is as genki as a gourd!"

"When the time came to judge the food I was, for the most part, satisfied. The food was well prepared and actually edible. Gary lived up to expectation and got a perfect ten. But when it came to Oscar and Xaria's fruit salad everything came crashing down … including Team Grenades winning streak. It turns out that the fruit salad was where the tainted star fruity had ended up through dumb luck … and Team Grenade were not amused. Haha!"

"Kasimar sneakily ratted out his partner in crime and Wallace got a humiliation conga by being held down by Oscar while Xaria force fed him his own tainted star fruit. He puked … like a lot! Team Jungle came first with Team Puzzle in second which meant that Team Grenade were to vote someone off. As Wallace and Kasimar were equally hated it looked like it was going to be a shocking ceremony indeed."

"They say you should treat your henchmen well or they will turn on you. Well; Wallace may have treated Kasimar very well but Kasimar didn't care. He betrayed Wallace to save his own hide and combined with the votes of the others it was a clear majority in favor of the sunglasses wearing bad guy to leave. And he tripped while walking the dock of shame … Haha!"

"We have fifteen campers still in the competition. Who will be the next to leave? How much longer will Kasimar last now that he has no allies? Will Spider and Quana get closer? And who is truly a wizard? Find out now on this magical episode of Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous).

* * *

Oscar was sitting down on the steps outside his cabin; he appeared to be thinking about something important. He had his head in his hands and was looking up at the clear and sunny blue sky.

"_I could have ended it; if I had voted for Kasimar then he would have been gone and our problems would be over … but I just couldn't for some reason … I just had a feeling Wallace was the right choice_." Thought Oscar to himself silently. "_For some reason I just got so pissed off with what he did to Xaria; I always did hate foul play. I don't know why but something about Xaria makes me happy. Well; whatever it is it's pretty given that Kasimar is going the next time we lose_."

"Something on your mind Oscar?" Asked Lavender as she sleepily walked out of the girl's side of the Team Grenade cabin. "You look like you are pondering the meaning of our very existence."

"Not quite red." Chuckled Oscar. "I'm just thinking about … things that have happened."

"Me too; I've got a big one on my mind." Said Lavender as she sat down next to Oscar.

"Really? What is it? Something big?" Asked Oscar as he looked back up at the sky for a moment.

"Its just … how the hell did Kasimar survive last night?" Asked Lavender. "It should have been a tie. I know for a fact that Kasimar, Raven and Xaria voted for Wallace and I, you and Mable voted for Kasimar. I'm taking a guess that Wallace voted for you. So how did he survive?" Asked Lavender in visible frustration. "It's just impossible! Nothing adds up!"

Oscar nervously scratched behind his neck and began to try to make an explanation.

"Err; well … I think it might have something to do with me." Said Oscar hesitantly.

"Really; how?" Asked Lavender as she turned to Oscar. "You didn't vote for me did you?"

"No way! You are not only one of our strongest team members but you are really nice … and at the same time there are ugly toe rags like Wallace and Kasimar running around. No … I voted for Wallace."

Lavender looked surprised for a moment and raised an eyebrow.

"Not that I mind Wallace being gone … but why vote for him when Kasimar is still here?" Asked Lavender slowly.

"That is just it." Said Oscar with a sigh. "I don't know. I just … got really angry with all the stuff Wallace was doing; he cheats, he's pretty nasty and that stunt with the jalapeño was the last straw. I didn't like seeing Xaria crying like that."

As soon as Oscar said that realization seemed to hit him like a lightning bolt and his muscular chest heated up a little. After a few moments of silence Lavender continued speaking.

"You know; you and Xaria have been hanging out a bit lately; and you both teamed up to humiliate Wallace yesterday. In my opinion it's as if you are dating … even though I know that you aren't." Said Lavender as she crossed her legs.

"You know Red; I think … that you've just helped me completely realize why I voted for Wallace instead of Kasimar. I think … I think that I _like_ Xaria." Blushed Oscar for the first time since he arrived on the island.

* * *

**Confessional: He admitted it!**

**Lavender: First a Chef and a Shy girl; now a body builder and a withdrawn girl with a snarky attitude … that's really cute!**

**Oscar: It's a good thing Kasimar didn't hear that … if he did it wouldn't end well.**

* * *

"Wow; I didn't think you were the type for love." Smirked Lavender. "I mean; you are a muscular body builder after all."

"Hey; even we muscle men have feelings and emotions." Replied Oscar defensively. "And besides; you're the one who likes Barney aren't you?"

Lavender blushed as red as her hair and looked away.

"Why do people keep insinuating I like him? He's … just … a …friend!" said Lavender in heavy embarrassment. "But I don't think my love life matters at the moment; I'm curious as to why you like her, you both seem pretty different."

"Well; I just like her. Tough, snarky, and not afraid to stand up to people. Plus I think she might have had a troubled past, I just have a feeling. It's the same with me."

"Well; that answers that." Smiled Lavender as she got to her feet. "I'm going to get breakfast and … wait; you've had a troubled past?"

Oscar got to his feet and looked at Lavender.

"Let's just say I wasn't always as strong as I am now."

* * *

**Confessional: What the who now?**

**Lavender: Oscar not being strong? For some reason I just can't imagine that.**

Eleanor sat on her bed looking at Frost and Dandelion; perhaps it was because of them but Eleanor felt as sane currently as she did when she first arrived on Wawanakwa. Some of the other contestants were either starting to crack a little … that or they had lost their minds a long time ago in the case of Wallace. Eleanor couldn't help but feel relieved when she had heard that Wallace had been voted off; it was like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders now that the over the top bad guy was gone.

Quana was also in the room lying on her bed across from Eleanor; she was staring at the bunk above her and appeared to be deep in thought. She had been mostly silent since she had woken up and so far the only words she had said since waking up were good morning.

"So Quana; its pretty quiet in here isn't it with just the two of us." Said Eleanor as she lay down on her belly and looked across at her room mate. "I wonder what Nakia and Zita are doing at the Playa."

"Zita is probably stealing some loot from around the Playa … and Nakia is probably brushing her hair; though that's kind of a no brainer." Said Quana as she continued to gaze up at the underneath of the top bunk.

"Is something bothering you Quana?" Asked Eleanor as she moved one of her green and blond bangs to the side. "Only you seem a little bit distant."

"Well…" Began Quana while wondering how to phrase what she wanted to say.

"Is that creep Kasimar hitting on you again … both metaphorically and literally?" Asked Eleanor with narrowed eyes. "I wouldn't worry; now that Wallace is gone he's got nothing. Next time Team Grenade loses he's gone."

"It's surprisingly not Kasimar … this time." Said Quana as she turned onto her side and tapped her fingers together a little. "Eleanor; can I ask you something … something personal?"

"I guess so; what is it?" Asked Eleanor as she sat up again.

"Have you ever … had a crush on someone?" Asked Quana hesitantly.

"Nope; can't say that I have." Said Eleanor. "I mean; I've known some guys I think are a little cute but I don't have any rushes per say … why?"

"Err; you see … I think I've got a crush on someone." Blushed Quana while running a hand through her hair nervously.

"Well that's wonderful." Smiled Eleanor eagerly. "Who is he? Is he a nice guy? And why are you so nervous? You don't fancy Kasimar do you?"

"No way!" Said Quana quickly. "Anyone that nasty, perverted and horrible is not someone I would even dream about dreaming about giving even a handshake!"

"That's a relief." Said Eleanor. "I wouldn't want Kasimar coming in here; he might hurt Frost and Dandelion. So … who is it you like?"

Quana blushed even more and let out a sigh.

"I think I like Spider … but at the same time I'm really not sure. I've never been into relationships before as some people just want to get into my pants." Said Quana as her blush became cherry red.

* * *

**Confessional: I like cherries!**

**Quana: Spider seems nice and quite friendly … but this could just be purely platonic or the heat of the competition getting to me. You'd think a sixteen year old would have more experience about this sort of thing.**

**Eleanor: I'm no real expert on this type of thing … but what I do know should help Quana at least a little.**

* * *

"When did you first start feeling like this?" Asked Eleanor.

"Since Spider kicked Kasimar in the crotch yesterday when he slapped my butt." Said Quana as she fondly thought back to the sound of Kasimar's pained squeal.

"Maybe you're feeling so grateful to him and your mind is telling you that you should do something for him." Suggested Eleanor before looking back at her ferrets. "Though that's just a guess as I've never had a guy kick a bully in the crotch for me."

"Well when you put it that way." Giggled Quana happily. "But what would you recommend doing? I know you're only twelve years old but I'm kind of up the creek without a paddle here."

"Errm … maybe … maybe you should just wait a while and see if the feeling goes or not." Said Eleanor as she got up and off her bed. "Maybe in the meantime we should have breakfast."

"Good idea; maybe something tasty could clear my head." Agreed Quana as she got up from her bed.

* * *

**Confessional: I sadly cannot eat so I know none of the joys of breakfast time.**

**Quana: Eleanor is right; I could just be feeling grateful to Spider for defending me. Still; whether I like him or not I **_**suppose**_** I can admit he is kinda cute.**

**Eleanor: Hmmm; my advice seemed pretty good … maybe I could become a councilor … but I wouldn't want to be a C.I.T if I ended up like that girl Courtney.**

**Tabitha: I don't know why but I've got that feeling again; the feeling that I've missed something important; I hope it wasn't anything that could threaten my progress in this competition.**

* * *

It was class time in Wawanakwa … or more specifically Barney was giving Spider his next lesson while they were in the boat house. Or at least he would be if he wasn't so distracted by all the sea related items in the room.

"Look at the size of that monster!" Grinned Barney as he sized up a particularly large set of shark teeth. "You could bite clean through a while live aardvark with those!"

"I think that is kind of *cough* the point … wait a second; why *cough* would a shark want to eat an *cough* aardvark anyway? And why would a *sneeze* aardvark be in the sea?"

"Details, details." Waved off Barney as he pulled up two crates and sat on one. "Now take a seat me heartie so we can begin your next lesson … if ye dare!"

"Err … *cough* ok." Said Spider as he sat on the crate across from Barney and tried not to look at the shark teeth on the wall or the fish eyes in a jar that seemed to be watching him. "So … what is my *cough* next lesson?"

"One that has helped not only a lot of people hook up but something that has also increased the snuggling statistics in Canada." Said Barney dramatically. "…Write her a love note!"

Spider's heart started to beat faster and he instantly spotted a problem with that plan.

"Barney; I can't just *cough* walk up and give her *cough* a note; she'd reject me in the *sneeze* blink of an eye." Said Spider nervously as he hung his head. "To be honest I don't really see the *cough* point in this anymore."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa me heartie." Said Barney as he leapt up from his crate and stood in front of Spider. "Do you mean to tell me you are battening down the hatches and giving up yaaaar?"

"Well; I don't *cough* know." Sighed Spider. "I don't really *sniffle* seem to be making much progress *cough* so far."

"The sea wasn't built in a day me heartie." Said Barney before putting a hand on Spider's shoulder. "You're just expecting too much of yourself yaaaar. And don't deny that you love her because you do … don't you?"

"Yes … I do." Nodded Spider. "But there *cough* are so many other guys here *cough* who are better than me."

"Name one." Said Barney.

"Ok then; Oscar, he's strong *cough* and muscular … but why stop there? Vinnie has a *cough* metal arm, Gary *cough* can cook, and you, you're interesting and *cough* fun. Why would she *cough* want me?"

* * *

**Confessional: Poor little woobie.**

**Spider: **(He sighs sadly).

**Barney: Spider is simply expecting too much of himself; I think I know how this pirate can turn it around yaaar! **

* * *

"Ok; I'll tell you why. In the first challenge when Quana was being chased by a boulder, who was there?" Asked Barney.

"I *cough* was." Said Spider.

"When Quana was facing her fear of cemeteries; who was it that comforted her?" persisted Barney.

"I *cough* did." Said spider as he looked up at his friend.

"When Kasimar smacked Quana on the ass and really upset her; who was it who tricked him into saying uncle and therefore got him eliminated from the challenge?"

"…Me." Said Spider as he began to smile.

"And yesterday; who was it who kicked Kasimar right in the _balls_ to protect Quana despite what Kasimar would do to anyone who dares stand up to him?" Asked Barney with a huge grin.

"Me. It was *cough* me!" Said Spider with a big smile and a sudden feeling of inspiration.

"You see me heartie; after all you've done I see little reason why Quana would not want you." Said Barney nicely. "And it shows you truly care for her like how a male sea horse cares for its offspring! Yaaaaar!"

"Thank you Barney; you *sneeze* are a true friend." Smiled Spider gratefully as he stood up.

"Think nothing of it me heartful heartie." Said Barney modestly. "Now let's get you started on writing that love note!"

* * *

**Confessional: The momentum of motivation is monstrous to the max!**

**Spider: **(He is smiling). **After that I felt ***cough* **rejuvenated in my determination. I ***cough* **think I really made the so called ***sneeze* **love note heart warming. I just hope ***gag* **Quana likes it … but how will I ***cough* **tell her I wrote it?**

**Chris: Booooo! Lame! Barney should have smacked Spider around and called him out on being a wimp! Stupid friendship! Who ever heard of a friendly and kind pirate? I would break up any couples that formed as brutally as possible if it weren't against my contract to do so. Humph!**

* * *

Uzuri was in her cabin on the floor doodling once more; she was working on the picture she had been drawing yesterday. This one was unique in that is was neither violent nor was it creepy. It was a drawing of one of the other campers, a good friend of hers.

"Blue for the sleeves, dark pinky purple for the center and red for the hair." Said Uzuri as she colored in her drawing with colored pencils. "I wonder what he would look like in anime form. Big muscles, skull hat … and blue hair. You gotta have blue hair."

"What about blue hair?" Asked Tabitha as she walked in from a trip to the showers.

"Oh nothing." Giggled Uzuri as she continued drawing.

"What are you drawing?" Asked Tabitha curiously. "Please tell me it doesn't involve impalement this time."

"Nopesies! No impalement!" Giggled Uzuri as she continued coloring. "Just a harmless doodle I've been working on since yesterday."

"Can I see it?" Asked Tabitha with false interest.

"Well; it is sort of personal." Said Uzuri with a shy blush.

"Well; I'm guessing it isn't Vinnie as he doesn't have 'blue hair' that you apparently gotta have." Said Tabitha craftily.

"I never said it wasn't Vinnie and … whoa; you're good." Said Uzuri in awe.

"Thanks; it comes from being from a very social family." Smiled Tabitha falsely once more. "So; how does blue hair relate to Vinnie in any way?"

"I was wondering what he would look like in an anime." Explained Uzuri. "Well; now that you've figured it out you can have a look."

Uzuri handed Tabitha the paper she had been coloring and Tabitha looked at it and invisibly raised an eyebrow.

The picture was no doubt of Vinnie; who else had a metal arm? But at the same time it looked like some sort of alternative version of him. For one thing he was wearing a Viking helmet. And then there was the fact his shirt revealed his midriff which had a cobra tattoo on it. His normal shoes were replaced with spiky cleats and he overall looked more … badass.

"Uzuri; you do realize Vinnie doesn't have a cobra tattoo right?" Said Tabitha as she handed the picture back.

"I know; but I felt like drawing a snake in there somewhere." Explained Uzuri. "So; what do you think?"

"Its pretty good; you're certainly good at drawing humans. Most people have trouble with basic body proportion." Said Tabitha nicely to keep Uzuri happy. "You're not going to submit this to Deviantart are you?"

"Not this time; this is personal." Said Uzuri as she put the finished picture inside her sketchbook.

* * *

**Confessional: Personal art? Sounds interesting.**

**Uzuri: Is it wrong to draw a picture of someone you like? Nope! Is it wrong to like anime? Of course not. So now I ask you … is it wrong to draw a manly anime picture of someone you like? Owing to the last two answers I'd say its completely fine.**

**Tabitha: What does Uzuri see in Vinnie? Its like last season when that retard Lindsay started to like Tyler; no chemistry whatsoever. Still; maybe I should be supportive, if not for love none of us would be here. But then again Vinnie might convince Uzuri to vote with him and that could be a problem.**

* * *

Gary and Raven were sitting together under a large tree near camp; it was well hidden by an overgrowth of bushes and vines so they didn't have to worry about anyone finding them.

"So Wallace is gone huh?" Said Gary as he sat next to Raven holding her hand.

"Yep; I voted for him along with Xaria. Kasimar betrayed him and voting for him to leave as well. But I don't know who the other voter was." Said Raven as she watched a squirrel run up the true. "But to be honest I don't think it matters; Wallace is gone and with that we can breath a sigh of relief."

"Now we can focus our efforts on getting rid of Kasimar; personally I'm getting sick of him tormenting everyone. I can't recall one nice thing he's done since he arrived. But now that Wallace is gone Kasimar has nobody on his side, he's the only nasty person left."

"To think how long Heather lasted in season one huh?" Smiled Raven. "I'm voting for Kasimar next time no matter what."

"Life is good huh Ravy?" Smiled Gary. "A bad guy got humiliated and eliminated; we're in the final fifteen and we've got each other."

"You said it love; life is good." Said Raven also with a smile. "Though only one of us can win."

"Ah; but that is no match for sharing." Said Gary determinedly. "If I win I _might_ just share the prize with you."

* * *

**Confessional: What a good sport!**

**Gary: My mother always told me that its good to share and I think it would be nice to share a million big ones with Raven.**

**Chris: Lame! If I was a contestant and won the million I would laugh at the losers and rub it in there faces! Why can't people be more like me? Haha!**

* * *

"You would do that for me?" Said Raven in a touched voice. "That's so sweet."

"Think nothing off it." Smiled Gary. "Its just what comes natural to me."

"…Come here you!" Grinned Raven as she leaned in and kissed Gary which the chef quickly returned.

They continued to play about like this for a minute or two until someone entered the vicinity and chucked.

"Err … am I interrupting anything?" Asked Vinnie with a smirk.

Gary and Raven quickly pulled apart and looked embarrassed. Raven gulped and wrung her hands nervously which Gary noticed.

"Don't worry Ravy; Vinnie knows." Said Gary reassuringly. "Need anything Vinnie? Or do you like watching people smooch?"

"I was just taking a walk to clear my head." Said Vinnie. "I've just got a lot of things on my mind."

"Like what?" Asked Raven curiously.

"How I'm going to apologize to Fifi, how I'll survive the next Bonfire Ceremony we attend; and some … other things."

Gary thought for a split second and smirked.

"Is it about anything that begins with U and ends with zuri?" He asked with a sly grin.

Vinnie just blushed and sighed.

"Maybe." Said Vinnie after a few seconds of silence.

"Well why not go and tell Uzuri that you like her?" Suggested Raven with a smile.

"I'm not sure if she's into me though." Replied Vinnie. "I mean; she said something a little flirty yesterday but she was probably teasing me anyway."

"You'll never know unless you ask her." Said Raven. "I think she might be into you just as much as you are to her; me and Gary were like that."

"Thanks Raven." Smiled Vinnie. "I'll have to think about this."

Vinnie then left the clearing after giving a nod to both his friends and Gary smiled at Raven.

"That was really nice of you; did you take psychology?" Asked Gary.

"No; but I've seen a lot of my friends fall in love to know how to help someone with that sort of thing." Explained Raven before getting a mischievous smile. "Now … where were we?"

"Oh; I think I remember." Said Gary with a grin.

* * *

**Confessional: **(Insert kissy sounds here).

**Gary: **(He is smiling and is staring into space). **Whoa.**

**Raven: Is it wrong that we're so into each other? I don't really think so. We know we both like each other so why hold back from kissing right? Besides; some couples have got further than us in a shorter period of time.**

**Chris: Love sucks!**

**Vinnie: I've been thinking it over … I'm pretty sure I like Uzuri; but would my friends and family approve? You can't really deny she's a little … unique; but maybe that is exactly why I like her.**

* * *

Mable and Xaria were on the beach; Mable was lying on her belly on the sand wearing a two piece blue bikini and Xaria was in her normal cloths as she sat on a rock thinking.

"Nice weather huh Xaria?" Said Mable as she stretched out and relaxed in the warm sunshine. "I love the beach; though I prefer to stay on the sand and sun myself rather than swim."

"I'm the same; the sea water is always so cold and once you come out of the water the sand gets stuck all over you. I don't know how those surfers and beach athletes bare it." Said Xaria as she gazed out at the waves.

"Its thanks to the gift of communal showers." Said Mable as she closed her eyes and began to doze.

Silence arose and the only sounds were the splashes of the waves upon the wet sand nearest the water. Xaria stared out at the waved and began to think to herself.

"_Final fifteen; I didn't think I'd get this far. Its probably due to being placed on the strongest team, though maybe Team Puzzle would have been preferable as I Kasimar is a nasty reminder of the type of people I've had to put up with_." Though Xaria to herself.

Xaria shook her head and looked up at the cloudless sky.

"_Just bide your time Xaria; with Wallace gone Kasimar cannot go on much further. His luck is starting to run out. I just hope he doesn't hurt anyone badly. The way he is reminds me of Jaron … no! Better not think about it. Karma will step in at the right time_." Thought Xaria as she crossed her legs and looked back out at the waves.

* * *

**Confessional: If only I could read minds.**

**Xaria: I'm concerned that the longer Kasimar is here the worse and worse his misdeeds will become; I hope he doesn't hurt Jimmy or Eleanor, they're just kids! Well; Oscar could easily stop him, he's muscular enough. **(Xaria stares into space with a smile for a moment before shaking her head a little).

* * *

"You're rather quiet Xaria; are you thinking about something?" Asked Mable as she continued to doze.

"Its nothing important." Said Xaria. "Just thinking of stuff."

"Well; ok, if you're sure." Said Mable as she rolled over onto her back to sun herself equally all over. "So; any idea what the next challenge will be?"

"Probably something involving mental and emotional torture because we know how much Chris _loves_ us … and that last bit is complete sarcasm." Said Xaria dryly.

"Well; we signed the contracts so Chris is allowed to do all this … but a million dollars is worth it right?" Said Mable as she opened her eyes.

"Well; that is just it. Is it worth it?" Said Xaria. "Putting our health, sanity and well being on the line to amuse some sick audience when we only have a one in twenty six chance of striking it big. Eleven of us have already lost that chance. And I could be next"

Mable opened her eyes and looked at Xaria.

"That was deep." Said Mable looking impressed. "You just improvised that?"

"Pretty much." Shrugged Xaria. "But maybe I won't lose; even if it's a tiny chance it is a chance all the same."

"Well maybe some of us will leave with something other than money." Said Mable as she sat up. "Maybe some of us could find that special someone. I don't know if I exactly fancy anyone … though someone caught my eye as being _rather_ cute."

"Who is it?" Asked Xaria with interest. "Spider? Oscar? Barney?"

"Naw; its someone who has already walked the dock of shame." Said Mable as she stretched her arms and sighed happily. "I love me the sun."

* * *

**Confessional: I on the other hand love me the snow.**

**Mable: Boy; Xaria can say some really inspirational things sometimes. Very impressive. **(She smiles and then sighs a little bit). **I did have a bit of a crush on someone … but he is already gone. Its quite a shame; he was really supportive in the phobia challenge.**

**Xaria: I'm not a lovey dovie girl and besides; nobody would date me. Some of them are really nice as well; Spider in kind, Barney is crazy in a good way, Gary can cook well and he is polite … and Oscar helps those in need. Eh; I never joined for that, I just came here for the prize anyway.**

**Chris: Or it could be that you know that nobody would want you because you're not as good as me and you are afraid of dying sad and alone! Haha! Brutal and true! **(Chris smirks nastily).

* * *

"Now remember Spider; make sure nobody sees you and tape it right on the door where she will see it; got it?" Asked Barney as he and Spider walked back to camp. They had finished in the boat house and Barney felt like he done a very good deed when he restored Spider's confidence.

"Don't worry Barney; *cough* I remember." Said Spider as he held an A5 piece of red paper in his hand; the paper that had the love note written onto it.

"Excellent me heartie!" Grinned Barney. "I shall me in the mess hall if you need me; I'll be drinking some rum and thinking up ways to stop ye and the others from walking the plank yaaaar!"

* * *

**Confessional: What an accent!**

**Barney: Me accent gets a wee bit extreme when I'm really excited savvy? **

**Spider: Barney is kind of ***cough* **nuts … but he's my ***sneeze* **friend so its all ***splutter* **good.**

* * *

Barney left into the mess hall for breakfast while Spider continued to the cabins. He approached the girl's side and glanced in to be sure nobody was inside, it was empty.

"Ok; raise *cough* hand, place note, walk *cough* away … here I go." Said Spider as he hesitantly took out some tape he had 'borrowed' from the boat house and taped the note onto the door. "I just hope *cough* this won't backfire."

Spider took a deep breath and entered his cabin. He reached under a bed and took out a box of medical supplies; Spider sat on the bed and took out a pill and swallowed it.

"How I wish I didn't have *cough* white blood cell deficiency and *cough* such poor health; maybe then I'd *sneeze* have more friends." Said Spider as he put the box of medicine back under the bed.

"Hi Spider; how's it going?" Asked Jimmy as he entered the cabin.

"Morning Jimmy." Greeted Spider with a sickly sniffle. "I'm *cough* fine; just having some of *cough* my daily medication."

"It must suck being so ill all the time." Said Jimmy sympathetically. "I never liked hospitals so much."

"It is pretty *cough* lousy; but it could be worse." Said Spider as he coughed.

"Really; how?" Asked Jimmy.

"That I do *sneeze* not know." Said Spider with a sigh. "So; any reason you *cough* are here?"

"I came to tell you that breakfast is nearly over so you should come to the mess hall if you want something to eat." Said Jimmy before pausing and then continuing. "They say breakfast is good for your mind … and a healthy mind is a healthy body or something like that; maybe you'll feel less 'icky' if you eat something."

"Sure; breakfast sounds *cough* good." Said Spider. "And I'll need to be *cough* prepared for the next challenge *cough*. I just hope it won't be too *cough* painful."

"If it ain't broke, break it." Smiled Jimmy. "You never know; it could be fun."

* * *

**Confessional: About as fun as volatile explosive diarrhea…**

**Jimmy: I try to look at the positives in life. If its raining heavily the flowers will be happy. If the power goes out it'll make for a great game of hide and seek. I'm not usually upset or angry; it would take something seriously bad to make me completely lose my temper.**

**Spider: I wish I had Jimmy's ***cough* **positive outlook on life. To ***cough* **be so innocent and have so many ***sneeze* **friends would be really ***cough*** nice.**

* * *

Kasimar leaned against a tree in the woods just outside camp though a different direction than the one Gary and Raven had gone in. He was thinking to himself about what his next move should be now that Wallace was gone.

"Let's see; Wallace is gone and I now have no allies. Not a problem; just a minor setback." Said Kasimar to himself. "Wallace says that Tabitha is pretty nasty as well; the way she had Uzuri on her side shows me could be correct … that or they're lesbians, Yahaha!"

Kasimar reached into his pocket and took out two items; the first was a lighter with a picture of a demon on the front, the other was a pack of cigarettes. He lit up a cigarette and began to smoke while continuing to plan his next move. He puffed out some smoke and tossed the cigarette to the floor and stepped on it.

"Maybe Tabitha would be interested in an alliance; I could always threaten her … and if not I could just beat someone up to the point they are voted off due to injuries. My pathetic team and the other losers are quite stupid; thinking I'm a dumb bully. Unlucky for them they don't know that I am quite intelligent."

Kasimar chuckled darkly as he pocketed the cigarette pack and began to twirl his lighter; he flicked the fame on for a moment and then flicked it off and pocketed the lighter.

"Well; may as well get to mess hall; it might be time for another challenge, hopefully one where I can humiliate or otherwise torture someone."

Kasimar put his hands in his pockets and walked along the forest trail back to camp. He was silent as he walked along; he seemed to be thinking of something. Truth me told he was thinking what type of panties Quana wore as he is that much of a perverted dickhead.

Suddenly Kasimar heard a tweeting; he looked up and saw a birds nest in a tree with a bird sitting on the nest, presumably on some eggs. Kasimar smirked as he walked towards the tree.

"I … hate … birds." Said Kasimar as he punched the tree full force; instantly the birds nest fell down as the mother bird flew away. Kasimar looked at the nest; three eggs were in it.

"I like my eggs … scrambled." Smirked Kasimar as he stomped on the eggs and continued on his way with a pretty nasty laugh.

* * *

**Confessional: Those poor birds…**

**Kasimar: The best thing about small animals is that you can hurt them and they are unable to fight back; bees are the exception of course. Still; I wonder if birds can cry … that mother bird sure will be! Yahahahahaha!**

**Chris: I'm enjoying Kasimar's antics more and more. Maybe he'll break someone's arm! And I wouldn't have to eliminate him because it clearly states in section eleven, paragraph six that in the case of a contestant breaking the arm of another contestant it is perfectly acceptable as long as it brings in ratings. And I can just let Kasimar get away with anything as long as he brings in ratings. So many people are watching just to see what he does next!**

**Chef: **(He looks a little unnerved). **That Kasimar kid … is not right in the head. He really unsettles me; and I've seen a lot of things in my days in the war. I hope he doesn't last much longer.**

**Eleanor: I have a sudden feeling that some animals have been harmed. I have a sort of sixth sense for that due to all the time I spend around them.**

* * *

A while later the fifteen campers were in the mess hall finishing of breakfast; today it was scrambled eggs and toast. Before Gary had started tutoring him Chef Hatchet's eggs would have been black and blue, but now they looked pretty edible.

Lavender sat at the Team Grenade table next to Mable. Mable had by now changed back into her usual cloths.

"Well guys; we're down to six." Said Lavender to her team. "But its not so bad; I can see two positives easily. The first is that we have the most members out of all the teams."

"What's the second reason?" Asked Oscar.

"We know exactly who to get rid of next time if we lose." Said Lavender as she glared at Kasimar. "I haven't forgotten what you did yesterday."

"What thing?" Asked Kasimar as he took a bite out of his toast. "Betraying Wallace, looking up your skirt, insulting Xaria or generally insulting you al."

"The second thing; looking up my skirt!" Snarled Lavender. "You've dug your own grave; next time we lose you and your stupid Mohawk are gone."

"Yeah; now that Wallace is gone I'm voting for you and only you." Said Oscar from his seat next to Xaria.

"Wait; you didn't vote for Kasimar?" Said Raven in surprise. "Why not? I thought you hated him."

"I do." Agreed Oscar.

"So why not vote for him? The it would have been a tie so Kasimar could have gotten the boot."

"I'm right here you know!" Growled Kasimar.

"We know and we don't care." Scoffed Xaria. "But why Oscar?"

"Well … let's just say I was quite agitated that he caused our loss and burned your mouth with the jalapeño." Said Oscar while careful to not arise any suspicion.

Lavender looked at Oscar knowingly while everyone else looked satisfied and shrugged. Kasimar just smirked and tossed his plate behind him where it smashed.

"Well I personally thank you for prolonging my stay." Said Kasimar to Oscar with a rare smile before switching to a wicked grin. "And someday you might _seriously_ regret your decision."

* * *

**Confessional: Is that a threat or a promise?**

**Oscar: Kasimar doesn't scare me … though surprisingly he does have a point … will I regret it?**

**Xaria: That's actually really sweet; Oscar changed who he voted for because he didn't like seeing me in pain. That's so nice. **(Xaria giggles before freezing on the spot). **I did not just do that; edit it out!**

**Chris: I could but I won't! Haha!**

* * *

The five members of Team Puzzle were sitting around their table finishing off their breakfast's and were talking to each other; unlike the other two teams they had neither a complete monster or a villain with good publicity on their team.

"Day eleven huh." Said Barney as he balanced a spoon on his nose like a seal. "We're doing pretty well aren't we me hearties? The merge can't be much further away as nearly half of all twenty six of us are gone."

"Maybe there won't even be a merge." Said Eleanor doubtfully. "Maybe Chris will keep the teams until only one remains and then those few go head to head in a no holds bared final challenge."

"Possible; but is *cough* it probable?" Asked Spider as he drank some orange juice and sniffled. "A lot of the most *cough* surprising and tear jerking vote offs *cough* happen once teams are merged in this *sneeze* type of show."

"Spider's right." Said Quana as she sat next to Spider. "Chris loves ratings and there is no way he would miss out on a chance for tears and drama."

"Why is Chris so mean?" Asked Jimmy. "Sometimes I think he's even more evil than Kasimar. Why does he love our suffering so much?"

"Because he is a monstrous sadist." Explained Barney. "His mind and ego feed off the pain and wails of people who he deems lesser than himself. When his mind doesn't get its fill he gets nastier and pretty soon that new state will become the new normal. Basically he is a dickhead."

There was a short silence as everyone stared at Barney.

"Seriously Barney; are you on the honor roll at school or something?" Asked Quana.

"No, no I'm not." Denied Barney quickly. "But that is neither here nor there. Did I have a point?"

"Yep; Chris is like the opposite of Uzuri; a pure evil version." Said Quana with a small grumble.

"I don't like Chris; he'll *cough* never be the man *cough* his mother is." Said Spider with folded arms.

Quana burst into a mirthful fit of giggles that made Spider's stomach heat up quite a few degrees.

"That answers that then." Said Jimmy. "I have a feeling something big is going to happen today; maybe it'll be Kasimar's downfall."

"Here's hoping." Said Eleanor longingly.

* * *

**Confessional: What an insult!**

**Quana: Spider is so funny! Where did he think that one up? I wonder if Chris would cry if that one was used on him.**

**Jimmy: Its just like when people ay they have a feeling that a certain day will be like no other day; I've got that feeling right now.**

* * *

Team Jungle had just finished off a delightful meal of bacon, sausage and eggs. It was quite fulfilling and Uzuri let out a loud belch of approval.

"Uzuri!" Said Tabitha with some disgust.

"What? I'm just showing my approval to the chef's cooking." Smiled Uzuri. "And everyone knows that everything is better with bacon; particularly breakfast! Teehee!

"I'm glad you like it." Said Gary as he swallowed his last mouthful of sausage. "Even if we have the least team members we've at least been living the good life as far as edible food goes."

"True; I wouldn't have trusted my stomach in being able to handle any of Chef's crusty custard." Gagged Vinnie n thought of the sickening food.

"Don't worry too much Vinnie; Chef is starting to cook to an edible standard, notice that nobody is gagging anymore."

"I would have thought it impossible to teach Chef Hatchet to cook." Said Tabitha. "We saw him last season right?"

"It wasn't easy." Agreed Gary with a nod as he thought back to the first day or two of teaching the burly chef. "But I persevered in my goal and it looks like I am succeeding."

"Yay Gary!" Cheered Uzuri. "This is so far the best summer I've ever had! And Wallace is gone so there will be a lot less cheating going on."

"Hopefully … if only he had listened to my warning." Said Tabitha.

"What warning?" Asked Vinnie as he adjusted his hat.

"Well; you know he had an alliance with Kasimar right? I warned him that working with Kasimar wasn't a good idea as he doesn't give a damn about anyone but himself." Explained Tabitha; all this was sort of true. "He didn't believe me; well, he probably wishes he had listened now."

"Why would you warn a bad guy?" Asked Gary.

"I could tell he was less evil than Kasimar." Said Tabitha before beginning to lie. "I would have rathered Kasimar went and Wallace stayed … but that's how it goes sometimes, it wasn't my decision."

"Well now he is gone and we can relax." Smiled Uzuri. "Wasn't it funny when he was force fed his tainted star fruit? If he had choked his skin would have gone blue and his lungs would shrivel! Teehee!"

Gary and Tabitha looked slightly disturbed while unbeknownst to Uzuri Vinnie just smiled at her.

* * *

**Confessional: Shrivel like a prune or shrivel like seaweed? **

**Tabitha: I don't know how much longer I am willing to put up with Uzuri. I'll keep her till after the merge for sure as I need an ally on my team; if only I had another ally; one who wouldn't get distracted. Hmmm.**

**Uzuri: It's good that we won first place last time; maybe we can do it again? With Tabitha leading us I'm sure we could pull it off like a leg! She's not only a great leader but she is a great friend!**

* * *

"Abra Cadabra!" Yelled Chris at the top of his lungs as he burst into the mess hall.

"Oh my *cough* heart!" Groaned spider as he clutched his heart and breathed deeply.

"Haha! Looks like I scared a few of you. Haha!" Laughed Chris while wiping a tear of laughter from his eye.

"You're a sadist; you know that." Said Mable disapprovingly. "I don't get why you are such an asshole; its got gaining you any friends."

"You just think that because you aren't smart like me." Sneered Chris. "Now; take a good look at me."

The contestants did and immediately noticed Chris was dressed in a strange outfit. He sported a wizard's hat, half moon spectacles, wizard robes and a very long white beard that was obviously fake. He was dressed like a very well known headmaster of a certain school for witchcraft and wizardry.

"Hey; you're dressed as Dumbledore." Said Raven with a growing smile. "Does this mean today's challenge is based on Harry Potter?"

"No! Shut up!" roared Chris. "I am not who you said; I am Dumblegate and today's challenge is based on Parry Otter; a teenage wizard."

"You are so ripping off Harry Po-." Began Gary.

"Shut the hell up!" Growled Chris. "Nobody says the H and P words or I'll have to pay!"

"Harry Potter!" Laughed Lavender.

"Harry Potter!" Chimed in Eleanor.

"Harry Potter!" Finished Quana.

"Aaaaargh!" Growled Chris in frustration. "Well now I'm going to have to pay; why can't you just keep your mouths shut? Anyway; now that I can't go on with the ruse I may as well tell you the challenge rules normally. Today you will be reenacting scenes from the Harry Potter books. I know some of you have experience … and some of you don't. So this should be interesting! Haha!"

"Heh; looks like I can spoil some more of the books." Smirked Kasimar.

"Sadly Kasimar that is a no go." Said Chris regretfully. "A lot of fans who hadn't finished the series sent in hate mail about that episode. So because of that not only will there be no spoilers but also you are forbidden to reenact a scene from the Deathly Hallows; the seventh book, the one that the least people have read."

"Are those all the rules?" Asked Jimmy skeptically.

"Mostly; you will be perfecting your act for a live performance in the amphitheatre this evening." Said Chris. "Oh; and when I say reenact you only have to stick MOSTLY to the real thing, feel free to add your own elements … and no Harry and Draco slash! Seriously; it is disgusting! They bloomin hate each other!"

"What about those of us who haven't read the books?" Asked Xaria. "I haven't read them."

"That is why we are handing out copies of the first six books to each team. It should give you a bit of a push in the right direction." Shrugged Chris. "Now get going, you don't have all day!"

"But since this challenge ends in the evening we technically do." Said Eleanor.

"Shut up!" Said Chris as he began to snarl; he actually look a big deranged which was kind of scary.

* * *

**Confessional: A wee bit immature don't you think?**

**Raven: This is my sort of challenge; I feel confident that we will secure victory today. And of course Gary and his team will come second.**

**Gary: This challenge is gonna be fun!**

**Tabitha: I admit I've read some of the Harry Potter series … but I prefer Twilight. Well; I may as well get this over with.**

**Chris: #Bleep#! Thanks to those losers I have to pay for the right to use this challenge! Aaaaargh! **(Chris starts screaming in anger).

* * *

"Now get out there and start ripping off Harry Potter!" Ordered Chris with a forced smile.

The fifteen campers left to start the challenge while Chris turned to the camera man.

"It is a Harry Potter challenge and it looks like Team Puzzle is doomed to lose! Haha! Will Tabitha continue her manipulations? What will Kasimar do next? Will these acts have _any_ talent whatsoever? And who will have the shameful title as being the twelfth voted off of Total Drama letterz? Stay tuned to find out."

* * *

That's he first part of day eleven. The next chapter will be coming soon. I can promise a little innuendo, a lot of humor ... and one camper crossed the moral event horizon.

Don't forget to leave a review if you like the story!


	24. Day 11, Part 2, Avada Kedavra

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and cartoon Network. I also so not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own each and every one of the twenty eight OC's in this story so do not steal them.

**The warning:** This chapter contains bad acting, a complete monster, a serious injury, some kisses, a sadistic host and a paid bad deed. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Couples:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven** VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.

**Note: **Here is chapter twenty four; this one is probably the darkest chapter yet, mostly because of a certain part near the end. This chapter might drop some jaws but rest assured everything will be happy in the end. Also I didn't have copies of the Harry Potter books to work from; I had to do it from memory so please forgive any inaccuracies.

Don't stop me now; I'm having a good time, I'm having a ball!

* * *

Team Puzzle were in camp reading through the books that they had been given; it would have been an enjoyable reading session if it weren't for the fact that they had to put on a reenactment of a scene from the books by the end of the day; an as none of the remaining five members of the team were exactly 'super fans' of the Harry Potter series this challenge presented a bit of a problem.

"What scene do you think we could reenact guys?" Asked Eleanor as she flicked through a copy of 'The Chamber of Secrets'. "The bit with the Basilisk looks exciting but how would we do that without a snake?"

"I'm not sure; maybe we could do the part where Harry finds out he is a wizard." Suggested Jimmy from his seat on the cabin steps next to Eleanor. "Though how would we get anyone big enough to be Hagrid? Maybe I could stand on Barney's shoulders or something."

"How about we … no; that's no good." Said Quana as she looked through her copy of 'The Half Blood prince'.

"What wouldn't be any good Quana me singing sea lass?" Asked Barney as he read 'The Prisoner of Azkaban' upside down.

"The part where Ginny and Harry kiss." Said Quana as she put her book down. "Problem is that I don't think any of us have the experience or the bravery to put on a decent kissing scene."

"Yo ho! That isn't a problem." Smirked Barney. "I'm sure Spider could provide quite well."

"Me?" Asked Spider looking like his heart had just stopped.

"Well I can't do it and Jimmy certainly can't do it; I like someone else and Jimmy's too young for Quana; you are the only other option … and I'm certain Eleanor wouldn't be up for it even if Chris would like it savvy?" Explained Barney.

"Its ok; I think we should just pick another scene." Said Quana as she picked the book back up and hid her blush.

* * *

**Confessional: In my opinion that would have been a very good scene to act out.**

**Quana: This challenge is both hard … and quite awkward at times. Talking about kissing is really embarrassing if it is you that it relates to.**

**Spider: Barney is quite non subtle ***cough* **abut how he ships me and ***cough* **Quana. That was odd though; why ***cough* **did I get so nervous about the idea of ***cough* **kissing her? You'd think I'd be ***sneeze* **really up for it … am I ***choke* **a wimp?**

* * *

"We've got to pick a scene *cough* soon; if not then we'll be disqualified *cough* by default." Said Spider as he read through his copy of 'The Philosophers Stone'. "Maybe we could base *cough* our act around a scene involving *cough* a popular character."

"Good idea; that way we can appeal to the masses." Agreed Jimmy before thinking hard. "But who is the most popular character?"

"Well; who do the fans prefer? That'll be a starting point." Said Eleanor. "From what I know so far I think that Umbridge is the most universally hated character."

"I've heard of her; wasn't she described as having a face like a toad?" Asked Quana with a look of repulsion.

"That's her." Said Eleanor with a nod.

"Yaaaaar! We just have to think on who would be the most enjoyable to see being role played; I'm talking about someone who has to go sipping in a snap … I'm talking about Snape!"

"Snape? The potions *cough* master?" Asked Spider as he looked up from his book.

"In the flesh; how did you know he was a potions master?" Asked Barney.

"There's a scene with *cough* him that I'm reading right *cough* now." Explained Spider. "Want a *cough* read?"

"Sure; let's have a look." Said Barney as Spider passed him the book; Barney quickly read through the pages and a minute later he smiled. "Ahoy hoy; I spy on the horizon the scene we will be reenacting."

"Which one; there are a lot of scenes with Snape." Said Eleanor as she put her book down.

"The one where it all began; Harry's first potions class with Snape; where he was told about bottling fame, brewing sea salty glory and putting a bow stopper on death! Yaaaaar! It looks exciting." Said Barney in excitement. "Who thinks we should?"

"I agree; from what I *cough* read; it was interesting and well *cough* written." Said Spider as he sniffled sickly a little bit.

"I'm in." Smiled jimmy. "Maybe I can play Ron; he's pretty funny."

"This sounds like it is gonna be fun." Said Eleanor happily. "So Quana; what do you think?"

"I don't mind … but will it be enough to impress Chris? He'll be looking for any reason to deduct points and make us lose." Pondered Quana before giving a sweet smile. "But I'm all for it."

"Then it's settled … time to start rehearing … and of course; making a few 'tweaks' here … and there." Said Barney with his usual genki grin while rubbing his hands with a cackle of delight.

"What kind of 'tweaks'?" Asked Quana suspiciously.

"Nothing nasty; just something crazy wacky funny!" Exclaimed Barney with a hearty laugh. "Now; shall we start handing out the parts?"

"But are there any female roles?" Asked Eleanor.

"I don't think so." Said Barney as he stroked his chin before grinning again. "But it's nothing we can't sort out. Now; I'll be Snape if nobody objects."

"Fine by me." Shrugged Eleanor. "I guess Jimmy could be Ron."

"Thanks." Smiled Jimmy. "And Spider could be Harry."

"You really think I *cough* could?" Asked Spider with a small smile but also a bit of doubtfulness.

"Don't put yourself down Spider." Said Quana supportively. "You could be a very good actor."

"Well; ok then." Agreed Spider with an invisible blush because his crush was complimenting him. "But what *cough* about Eleanor and Quana? What parts will they have?"

"I'm sure I can think of something." Said Barney before tipping his hat. "And that is what self insertation is for."

* * *

**Confessional: Why can't I be part of the story? Huh? HUH?**

**Jimmy: I think I could play Ron pretty well … or at least I'll try. But with Barney setting the script it is pretty inevitable that we are going to be out of character for a little bit.**

**Eleanor: I wonder what 'tweaks' Barney is planning. And I wonder how inserting me and Quana as ourselves into the scene will work out. I just hope Barney can play a convincing professor Snape.**

**Barney: Time to put my distinction graded Drama experience to good use. Yo ho Yaaaaar!**

* * *

Team Grenade were behind the mess hall and were making some progress; more than Team Puzzle were at least because they had Raven, a Harry Potter fan, on the team. But of course; when you have someone like Kasimar on the team this advantage is made a tad smaller.

"Harry Potter is stupid." Said Kasimar as he flicked through the pages of 'The Goblet of Fire' with a bored expression. "How a brain dead nerd could be a hero I'll never know, if anything he looks like the type of guy I'd like to give a concussion."

"He's twenty times the man you'll ever be." Replied Xaria dryly as she looked in her book. "For one thing he isn't a comedic psychopath who gets a thrill out of making people feel as little as he is deep inside."

"Burn!" Chuckled Oscar with a smirk.

"A knife in your mother's ribcage." Said Kasimar casually as he tossed the book to the floor and began to think to himself.

"What did you say?" Said Oscar angrily but Xaria intervened before anything violent could happen.

"Don't even bother Oscar." Said Xaria as she glared at Kasimar. "He's not even worth it."

"Thanks." Said Oscar as he got back to reading. "Got any ideas of what scene we could do?"

"Not really; I've never read the Harry Potter books until today; fantasy isn't really my cup of coffee, err, tea." Said Xaria. "I prefer gothic and mystery; a combination perhaps."

* * *

**Confessional: I'd prefer a cup of lemonade!**

**Xaria: I have unusual tastes in reading; I like the more little known works; or classics like 'the Castle of Otranto'. Though its not like I spend lucrative amounts of time in the public library.**

* * *

"Got any ideas which scene we can perform?" Asked Lavender to Raven. "I may be the leader but I show no shame in admitting to the fact I'm no Harry Potter fan girl."

"Wait; you want me to lead?" Asked Raven with a blink of surprise. "You think I can?"

"I'm sure you can; you know the most of the series out of everyone on the team." Smiled Lavender.

"I agree; I think this is _your_ challenge; they say there are certain challenges designed for certain people like the cooking challenge was great for gary; but this time I think you could get us to come out on top." Said Mable with an air of enthusiasm and support.

"Alright; I guess I could lead; why not?" Smiled Raven. "So; I'd like to hear your opinions on what scene we should perform, I've heard good leaders listen to their team mates."

"Who says we're all going to follow the leadership of her?" Asked Kasimar rudely from his seat on a crate. "I see two problems with her being leader."

"And what are the problems you've noticed; he asked not expected a halfway decent response." Said Oscar dryly which made Xaria smirk.

"Number one; she's barely come out of her shell; how do we know she won't get strange fright hmm?" Said Kasimar smugly before moving on. "And problem number two; I doubt a frickin _girl_ can lead a group of six, let alone five or less!"

"Yeah; that's right; you just keep insulting us and being an asshole because it ain't gonna do you much good in the end is it?" Sneered Lavender to Kasimar who just scoffed.

"Say whatever you please; words won't stop me from winning."

"Team Grenade was a fitting name for this team." Said Mable after a moment of silence. "A lot of us have explosive personalities."

"Good point; with all this inner team conflict it's a wonder how we've managed to win as much as we have." Said Xaria as she sighed in exasperation.

"Probably through the combined efforts of me, you, Lavender, Mable and Raven." Said Oscar. "Carlton was always scared and winkus and dinkus offer nothing except an easy scapegoat."

* * *

**Confessional: Does a scapegoat have horns?**

**Mable: Lavender is right; all of Kasimar's bad deeds aren't going to do him much good in this contest. He has sealed his fate long ago.**

**Lavender: I shouldn't keep getting so angry at Kasimar; it'll give him the satisfaction he yearns for. But I doubt I could ignore him; what to do?**

**Kasimar: **(He is leaning against the wall of the confessional with his legs on the seat and is smirking). **Truth is that its just funny to get people angry; and nobody can say they aren't a bully. At some point in your life someone is going to #bleep# with your #bleep# and then you'll bully them to vent your frustrations. How do you know I'm not upset about some personal tragedy? …Ok; I'm not, I just do this because its funny to upset people but my point still remains.**

**Raven: Ooooh; I don't like confrontations! Fights never solve anything; that's why I moved the conversation along.**

* * *

"Come on guys this fight isn't solving anything." Said Raven democratically. "How about we just focus on the challenge; we might win. And if we lose we can vote for whoever we don't like, agree?"

"Sure." Shrugged Xaria. "Not like Kasimar is going to survive another Bonfire Ceremony anyway."

"Good; now, I know a good scene we could reenact; we've got the exact amount of people needed for it though we'll have to cut the part with Snape now that we no longer have seven people." Said Raven with a smile. "I think we could reenact the scene where Sirius black confronts Harry and his friends; and then Lupin intervenes and soon Pettigrew is exposed. Does that sound ok?"

"Sounds pretty exciting … but I've read that scene a few minutes ago … there's only one female character yet we have four girls here." Said Mable. "I guess some of us have to dress in male cloths."

"If you don't mind; I could always pick another scene if you want." Offered Raven.

"Its fine; I don't really mind, and we may not even need costumes." Said Mable with a shrug of acceptance.

"We should dress up a little; we could get more points that way." Said Raven. "So; who wants which part?"

"Can I be Hermione?" Asked Lavender politely. "I think I could play her pretty well."

"Sure; and I'd like to be Harry … if that is ok with you guys." Added Raven quickly.

"No objections there." Said Oscar with an almost brotherly smile. "So what part do I get?"

"I think you should be Sirius Black himself; I don't know why but something tells me you would be good at playing as him."

"I'll certainly try my best." Agreed Oscar. "So what about Xaria, Mable and Kasimar?"

"Well I think Xaria would be good as Lupin, Mable could be Ron … and Kasimar could be Peter Pettigrew."

"I think you've forgotten to think about a certain something there." Said Kasimar dryly.

"Don't worry; I have already taken your sniveling cowardliness into consideration." Said Raven bravely with a smirk.

Everyone besides Kasimar began to laugh; Kasimar just growled but continued.

"I meant that Pettigrew is short; I'm tall! Wouldn't you be better as Pettigrew given you're a short shit?" Asked Kasimar with a tad of backhandedness.

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response." Said Raven as she turned away from Kasimar. "Ok everyone; get out a copy of 'The Prisoner of Azkaban' and lets get rehearsing."

"Should we make tweaks?" Asked Mable.

"I don't know; Chris might be using reverse psychology on us; make us think that making tweaks will improve our score when really it will only ruin it." Said Raven. "We'll just stick to the original formula for now."

* * *

**Confessional: But then the professor added and extra ingredient to the concoction … formula X!**

**Raven: I hope this doesn't end badly; especially because I've got a good feeling about this challenge. Maybe I could lead us to first place.**

**Lavender: raven can make some really good comebacks when the situation is right; the look on Kasimar's face was really satisfying. I see today's challenge as Win-Win; either we come first and get a prize, come second and last another day … or we vote Kasimar off the island, everybody's a winner! Well; not Kasimar obviously.** (Lavender smirks).

* * *

"So the cruciatus curse causes immense pain." Said Uzuri with great interest as she looked through 'The Goblet of Fire' with a genki smile on her face. "Sounds fun! Teehee!"

"Only you would think that." Said Tabitha in a humoring tone. "Extensive torturous pain is, for a light way of putting it, extremely unpleasant."

"Tabitha's right; it is a dangerous and illegal curse. In the Harry Potter world, performing it on another human lands you in Azkaban and to the non existent mercy of the dementors for the rest of your life." Said Gary seriously.

"So I guess that is bad." Sad Uzuri.

"It depends if you think getting your soul sucked out is bad or not." Continued Gary.

"Hmmmmm … I'd say pretty bad." Said Uzuri before voicing a rather odd question. "What do you think a soul tastes like? I'd say like lemons and cheddar."

"That's our Uzuri!" Chuckled Vinnie. "But why would you want to know what a soul tastes like?"

"No reason; I was just curious." Said Uzuri with her usual smile. "I wonder what other monsters are in Harry Potter because you just can't have a fantasy novel without a bloodthirsty monster or two."

"Well; there are Inferi and a three headed behemoth dog named fluffy to name two." Said Gary. "Most of the nasty things are actually humans on the dark side."

"You mean like star wars?" Asked Vinnie.

"Well; there is a dark side but there aren't any death stars, pod races or spaceships." Chuckled Gary as he stood up from the beach sand. "So; anyone found a scene they wouldn't mind reenacting?"

"I don't mind what we do." Shrugged Vinnie. "So long as we don't lose as I don't want to go to another Bonfire Ceremony and be left on a team of three if I even survive another one."

"You might survive another ceremony." Said Tabitha without looking up from her book. "At this rate our team might end up with a tie in the votes."

* * *

**Confessional: Tie's are stylish!**

**Tabitha: And I'm sure I could win whatever tie breaker Chris devises be it a mini challenge or a camper from another team voting. At the moment everyone thinks I'm so nice and likable. I intend to keep it that way until I win the money. The looks on there faces. **(Tabitha smirks nastily).

* * *

"I just had a thought." Said Gary suddenly after a short silence. "If any of us made it to the finals; who would you like to be against?"

"Hmmmm; I'd say someone that would be fun to compete against, like Jimmy." Said Uzuri with her usual sunny expression. "Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering." Shrugged Gary. "Also to see who we think we would be able to compete one on one against."

"I think I would go for Eleanor; I just think I could stand a chance against her." Said Vinnie. "What about you Gary?"

"Raven." Said Gary without thinking and instantly realizing his mistake.

"Any reason why?" Asked Tabitha curiously and with a sudden miniscule amount of suspicion.

"Not really; I just think I would be able to beat her without too much trouble; perhaps easier than Jimmy." Lied Gary while keeping his facial expression completely neutral.

"Fair enough." Shrugged Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: How is enough fair? I want more than enough!**

**Tabitha: I wonder why Gary said raven so quickly. Could they have an alliance? …No; I'm just being paranoid, reality shows do that to people.**

**Gary: That was a close one; I know they are my friends but I'd prefer to keep the 'me and Raven, Raven and me' business out of focus for a while. Maybe I'll tell them soon … but not just yet.**

* * *

"So what about you Tabitha? Who would you like to crack skulls with?" Asked Uzuri eagerly.

"I think the phrase is 'butt heads with'." Said Vinnie though he couldn't help but smile.

"I would like to be in the finals … with Kasimar." Said Tabitha.

The looks on the faces of the other three were full of surprise and confusion.

* * *

**Confessional: Flat WHAT!**

**Vinnie: **(He looks confused). **Why would anyone want to compete against that monster? Let alone even be within a sixty foot radius of him.**

* * *

"Err … any reason why you would like to be against that dick?" Asked Vinnie with a raised eyebrow.

"A few valid reasons yes; first of all if this season is anything like last time then the eliminated twenty four will all support me as I am nice and Kasimar is evil. Thus I will have an advantage due to the people helping me. Second of all … wouldn't it be nice to be the one to defeat Kasimar? All his nastiness, his hopes and his chances … it'll all come crashing down once I beat him. That is why I would like to be against Kasimar."

* * *

**Confessional: Lesser of two evils perhaps?**

**Tabitha: When I say I'm nice I mean that I'm basically a saint compared to Kasimar. I'm not exactly nice but I do feel that I am a step or two above Kasimar's level.**

* * *

"Now that's strategic." Smiled Uzuri. "I never would have thought of that … but what should we do for our scene?"

"I was thinking the scene where Ron and Harry are attacked by the Aractula spiders." Said Gary. "We'd only need four actors which is good since there is only four of us."

"So what characters are we going to be playing besides Harry and Ron?" Asked Vinnie.

"There is the spider king Aragog and one of us could dress up in an outfit with a lot of little spider's on it to act as his offspring. Since I'm the biggest Harry Potter fan on the team and I'm not scared of spiders at all I think I'll be Harry; unless someone else wants the part."

"Nope! That's fine … but only if I get to Aragog!" Giggled Uzuri.

"I don't see a problem with that … but is there any particular reason why?" Asked Gary.

"I like spiders." Replied Uzuri. "Though I have kinda amputated the legs of a few of them … Oh well!"

"I guess I'll be Ron." Offered Vinnie. "Should I take off my hat because I know that Ron doesn't wear one."

"That's a good idea; Chris will deduct points for even the smallest thing so we shouldn't give him anything to start on." Said Gary.

"I guess that leaves me as the spider hoard." Said Tabitha. "It'll do … but what should I say?"

"Just make hissy sounds and growls." Suggested Uzuri. "These spiders are man eating after all."

* * *

**Confessional: I hope they aren't confessional eating.**

**Tabitha: Now; I know what you're thinking. Why would I want to be the spider hoard? Well it is because if I have the least lines I have less chance of messing up; thus I won't be the one at fault if we lose.**

**Vinnie: I'm not too fond of spiders to be honest; but somehow I don't think seeing Uzuri dressing as a spider is going to creep me out.**

* * *

Team Puzzle had finished dishing out the parts and were looking at the script that had been finished; a few eyebrows were raised and the team sans Barney felt both amused and embarrassed at what they were required to say.

"Are you sure that this is a good idea Barney?" Asked Eleanor. "I can see a major innuendo in there."

"Well Chris did say that it is ok to make some tweaks; I'm just doing what he told me to. And besides; I think this is winning material!" Said Barney proudly. "Have I ever stirred you guys wrong?"

Nobody said anything to that as truthfully Barney hadn't stirred them wrong.

"Exactly." Smirked Barney. "Now; I think we can take five and relax yaaar; we've been battening the hatches for about an hour so we can just relax for a few minutes, maybe get a snack or go to our cabins and clear our heads."

"Sure; and you know, I think I could go for some doughnuts; luckily I bought a supply of them with me." Said Quana with a little drool. "I'll go and get them, be right back."

As Quana walked back to their cabin Barney pulled Spider to the side quite suddenly and he had a smile on his face.

"Could you let me *cough* know in advance the next time you *cough* are going to grab me?" Asked Spider politely while he held his head as his vision went dizzy for a moment. "So; what is it you need?"

"Just letting you know that Quana is going to her cabin; you did put the note there didn't you me heartie?" Asked Barney with a look of excitement on his face.

"So she'll see the *cough* note." Said spider with a gulp. "What if she *sneeze* doesn't like it?"

"I don't think you need to worry about that savvy! It was so well written; if I were a lass then I would like it. Now let's get back over to Jimmy and Eleanor before anyone gets suspicious. Just act … natural me heartie." Said Barney with a thumbs up to his apprentice as they walked back to the others.

"What were you two talking about?" Asked Jimmy curiously as the two teenage guys returned.

"Oh nothing much; this, that and maybe a little perspective." Said Barney smoothly.

"That … doesn't make much sense." Said Eleanor before giggling. "But I've come to expect that from you Barney."

* * *

**Confessional: It all comes down to this!**

**Spider: **(He has a blank facial expression). **I feel incredibly ***cough* **excited … and totally terrified ***cough* **at the same time … is this what ***sneeze* **love feels like?**

**Jimmy: Spider and Barney tend to hang out a bit and always seem to be talking about something … do they have a secret of some kind? Maybe an inner team alliance; naw, they're probably just telling jokes or something.**

* * *

Quana approached her cabin and walked up the steps. She was about to open the door but noticed a red piece of paper taped to it. It also had her name on it.

"What's this?" Asked Quana to herself as she removed the tape and looked at the paper. "I wonder if it's an invitation to an alliance."

Quana began to read the note and as she did her heart beat faster and a blush appeared on her face. It was no wonder really as this is what the note said.

_Your eyes are as sparkly as a reflective diamond_

_Your smile is kinda cute too_

_You are as capable and strong as 007 James Bond_

_You're such a cutie as well_

_I don't know what I wouldn't do_

_Because the fact remains that I an so totally in love with you._

Quana stood on the spot for a few moments, her heart racing and her legs feeling like wobbly jelly. A moment later she smiled and hugged the note to her chest.

"That was so sweet." Said Quana with a soft coo of happiness. "I wonder who wrote it."

Quana looked at the writing; it was small and very tidy but that helped little. She entered the cabin to get the box of doughnuts and began to talk to herself.

"So somebody here loves me." Said Quana happily as she reached under her bed for the doughnuts. "I wonder who it could be."

As Quana retrieved the box of doughy snacks a sudden thought occurred to her and she frowned.

"I really hope it isn't Kasimar who wrote it; though I don't see how such a low down, sadistic, cowardly bully could write a love note without it turning nasty." Said Quana to herself as she exited the cabin to go back to her team.

* * *

**Confessional: Did you know that the smell of love in the air is like strawberries?**

**Quana: Who could have wrote this note? I'd really like to know … it's so sweet and lovely. But then again … I am feeling all jiggly over Spider to a degree; what to do?**

**Chris: Boooooo! Love sucks! Spider doesn't deserve anyone; he's just a pathetic whelp of germs! Haha! And it isn't against my contract to insult the campers so insult them I shall; haha! **

* * *

"Hey guys; I got the doughnuts." Said Quana as she arrived back to the area her team were in and began handing them out.

"Alright! Strawberry jam filling!" Cheered Jimmy as he took a bite into his doughnut. "The king of all flavors of jam!"

"Yaaaaar! What a great sticky treat!" Grinned Barney as he ate the doughnut in one bite and began to chew the sticky dough.

"These don't have any traces of apple in them to they?" Asked Spider as he cautiously looked at his doughnut.

"Nope; the only fruit they have is strawberry." Said Quana; Spider could see a blush on her face and knew she had seen the note.

"Good; I've got to check because of my apple allergy." Said Spider as he sat down to eat his doughnut though he kept glancing at Quana which the singer didn't notice.

"Are you ok Quana? You look like something really big has happened." Said Eleanor in concern.

"Don't worry Eleanor; I'm fine … I just feel … exceedingly happy." Said Quana with a love struck sigh.

* * *

**Confessional: Cupids arrow right in the tooshy!**

**Barney: If this plan doesn't work then I'll happily eat my hat … and if I end up having to do just that then I may need some ketchup.**

**Chris: Lame!**

* * *

"Ok everyone; we're making good progress." Said Raven. "Maybe we should take a short break."

"Sounds good." Agreed Kasimar. "I could go for a deep drag right about now."

The other five were stunned as they turned to Kasimar.

"What? I know I'm good looking but you don't have to stare." Said Kasimar with a smirk.

"You smoke?" Asked Mable in disgust.

"So? What are you gonna do about it freak hair?" Sneered Kasimar. "And of course I smoke; its cool and I quite like the idea of hurting people through second hand smoking."

"You … monster!" Said Lavender in revolt.

"I try." Laughed Kasimar. "Now if you douche nozzles will excuse me; I'm going to get a snack from the kitchen; I don't think I'll have too many problems doing so since I am Chris's favorite."

And with that Kasimar left his team to go into the mess hall. Lavender sat down on a crate and looked shocked as it seemed as though she had realized something.

"Are you ok Lavender?" Asked Mable as she sat next to her best friend.

"I just realized … if he enjoys making people suffer from second hand smoking … then who do you think he is going to target the most?"

"Some group of people vulnerable to the smoke; maybe someone young and … oh _gosh_." Gasped Mable.

"What is it?" Asked Oscar. "Is the answer bad?"

"Very bad … Kasimar would probably want to harm … babies with second hand smoking." Said Lavender with her red eyes wide.

The jaws of everyone dropped about three and a half feet.

* * *

**Confessional: Forget Big Bad Bully; more like Jaw dropper.**

**Chris: Wasn't that funny? Someday I would like to have a child just like Kasimar, a child I could be proud of! Haha!**

**Oscar: This is beginning to get out of hand; I'm really starting to worry what sort of message Kasimar is sending out to the younger viewers of this show.**

**Lavender: I am shocked and appalled.**

**Xaria: When the time is right karma is going to strike Kasimar down like a lightning bolt.**

* * *

"Well; I think its safe to say that we're all voting for that _bastard_ next time we lose; right?" Said Xaria as she crossed her arms with a snarl in the complete monster's direction.

"Unless some sort of fluke happens like only Kasimar's vote being counted due to technical difficulties." Said Mable before shaking her head once which swished her large and long blue ponytail. "In other words he ain't gonna last much longer."

"We talk about Kasimar too much." Said Raven nervously because of all the high tempers. "If we keep talking about how much we dislike him then we'll end up being consumed by hatred and we'll be unable to think of anything else."

"Raven's got a point." Nodded Lavender. "We shouldn't waste our time on Kasimar; I mean, where will he be in ten years? Once he goes into the real world he'll be in for a rude awakening, especially after everyone has seen him on international television."

"Well; we may as well take a break then; get all this anger out of our systems as it's not healthy to bottle it up." Said Raven as she got up from her cross legged sitting position and walked to the communal washrooms.

"I'm going to go and get a drink; maybe clear my head." Said Lavender with a deep breath as she walked to the mess hall entrance.

"Wait up Lavender; I'll come too." Called Mable as she followed after Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: Can I come too?**

**Mable: When you are really, really, REALLY pissed off nothing cools you down like a glass of ice cold orange juice.**

* * *

Oscar crossed his legs and continued reading his copy of 'Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix'. He was growing to dislike the character Umbridge very much indeed. She was quite possibly the nastiest cow he had ever read about; she almost reminded him of Chris as both were nothing short of nasty sadists.

"They say a book is as good as its villain; no wonder this book is so popular." Mused Oscar out loud.

"Which villain? Voldemort?" Asked Xaria from her seat on a barrel.

"No; I meant Umbridge. A cruel, sadistic woman dressed in pink with weight problems." Said Oscar dramatically.

Xaria smirked for a brief moment before a look of anxiousness entered her face. Oscar immediately noticed this.

"You ok Xaria? You look quite stressed." Said Oscar in observement.

"That's because I am. I'm getting worried about our general safety." Said Xaria in worry. "I'm talking about Kasimar; he is more than just a bully; he's like some sort of expy of pure evil in human form."

"He may be pretty nasty and I agree with you; but why be scared of him, he really can't take a hit." Said Oscar in an attempt to put Xaria's nerves to rest.

"I know; but the amount of bad things he's coming out with, like what he just said, well, I'm concerned that he might … seriously hurt someone. Not just beat up but _really_ hurt." Said Xaria with a sigh of unease.

"What makes you think he will?" Asked Oscar. "He could just be all talk."

"…I know his kind." Said Xaria simply.

"…Do you want to talk about it?" Asked Oscar hesitantly.

"No thanks; its no problem." Said Xaria as she picked up a copy of 'The Half Blood Prince'. Yet she wasn't actually reading it … just hiding herself a little.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't know what to say as a joke this time.**

**Xaria: …I've never really been quite the same ever since the 'incident'. But I'm keeping it to myself; that's something I'm good at. Oscar may be nice and a good friend but I don't really want to say anything.**

**Oscar: I could tell Xaria was hiding herself behind that book; what is it that is bothering her? I think I shouldn't ask; there's a difference between being concerned and invading personal space. But then again…**

* * *

"Leave? I think not! I cannot deny my children fresh meat." Said Uzuri in a grisly spooky voice while dressed in a Spider costume that happened to be in a box labeled costumes in the mess hall.

"Excellent job Uzuri; I think you've got the part nailed down." Clapped Gary. He was now wearing some glasses without any glass in them to match his part as Harry Potter.

"Why thank you Gary." Smiled Uzuri as she switched back to her normal childish happy voice. "Nice specs! Now Kasimar can't hurt you because you're wearing glasses."

"He probably would whether I was wearing them or not; if he was actually brave enough to do it." Replied Gary. "I think we might win this one; you're really good at acting."

"Well we'll need to work as a team; just like Jigsaw's victims should have done to escape their gruesome demise! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri despite SAW being as far from a comedy as is possible.

"Yeah … work as a team." Said Gary in agreement as he began to look over his lines.

* * *

**Confessional: I would be on the blue team because blue is so cool!**

**Uzuri: I think we're going to win this one; our team is tighter than a hand in a spiked vice! Teehee!**

* * *

"I hope the merge is soon." Said Tabitha to herself as she looked down at herself in the ridiculous spider swarm outfit.

"Why's that Tabitha?" Asked Vinnie as he scratched an itch on the side of his head.

"We're down to four as it is in the current time. We therefore have the fewest members of all the teams. If we lose again we'll go down to three and at that point it will be nearly impossible to win. If the merge arrives we won't have to worry about being outnumbered anymore as it'll be every man or women for themselves. Though we can still work together if the situation calls for it." Explained Tabitha smoothly and calmly.

"Makes sense to me; and I'm not sure who to vote for next time; Gary's my friend and he gives us good meals, you're a brilliant leader and keep us together … and Uzuri, well, she's a very good friend." Said Vinnie as he looked up at the clouds. "Hey look; a cloud that's shaped like a duck."

"I see it too; but it's no big problem; it can be easily avoided in fact." Said Tabitha as she pulled up the hood on the spider swarm costume.

"What's that?" Asked Vinnie.

"Not losing." Said Tabitha and thus pointing out the obvious.

* * *

**Confessional: I should have known! **(Armless face palm).

**Vinnie: That was a pretty obvious answer … and it's the most effective way to avoid the voting situation.**

**Tabitha: How could he not see the answer? Maybe he lost some brain cells when he lost his arm. **(Tabitha laughs snarkly).

* * *

"So you know your lines right?" Asked Tabitha.

"I sure do; all I really have to say is how much I don't like spiders and that I want to leave the spider colony area." Said Vinnie in an affirmative answer.

"Well; I guess Gary has the most lines since he is playing the role of Harry Potter." Shrugged Tabitha. "Let's just hope he doesn't mess up."

"I don't think he will; he's read all seven books after all. I think we'll end up with second place at least." Assured Vinnie. "And if we get first place then so much the better."

"Yeah; I like winning." Agreed Tabitha. "It's not like an obsession but in today's society you can't finish in an unsatisfactory position or you could pay the price in ways other than money."

"Hey guys; wotcha talking about?" Asked Uzuri as she walked up in her spider costume; with her short height, big smile and the floppy cloth spider legs she looked really cute.

"Just about this challenge." Said Tabitha as she sighed while looking down at the costume. "This costume is ridiculous … but for the team I think I will put up with it for however long I need to."

"You think that costume is ridiculous? You should see the jigsaw killer; he wears a pig mask!" Said Uzuri wisely … or as wise as she could be anyway.

"When did you first get into horror movies anyway Uzuri?" Asked Vinnie curiously.

"Well; I've never really been scared of the sort of things that would make most peoples blood run cold. I just find it funny! It's always fun to watch a slasher movie for the first time and guess who's going to survive to the end." Explained Uzuri with her smile never leaving her face.

"So you aren't even scared of Pyramid Head?" Asked Vinnie in awe.

"Nopesies! His triangle head is actually pretty funny looking." Said Uzuri casually. "I'm the only person in town who has encountered him that hasn't been scared the first time. Nothing to fear but fear itself right?"

"Yeah, you're right; but try telling that to Spider, he's scared of fear itself." Said Vinnie in remembrance of day five's fear challenge.

"Speaking of Spiders; how do I look in this spider costume; pretty spicy hmmmm?" Smirked Uzuri slyly as she could as she sexily posed.

Vinnie just stammered and said something about feeling hungry and quickly left to the mess hall. Uzuri didn't notice his blush and looked a little disappointed.

"Maybe I'm coming on too strong." Lamented Uzuri with a sigh. "Perhaps I should just give it a rest for a little while; he reacted similarly to my flirting yesterday."

"Don't worry about it; he's probably just not used to being around a girl like you." Said Tabitha in false reassurance as in reality she didn't care whether Vinnie and Uzuri hooked up or not.

"Yeah; I have been told I'm unique a number of times." Said Uzuri as her smile returned before she frowned a little. "That or I'm scary, insane and abnormal."

"Those words don't describe you." Lied Tabitha with a false smile.

"Hey Uzuri; lets practice the lines again; we've gotta make this act trip the light fantastic." Called Gary from a short distance away as he held a page of hand written script.

"See you later Tabitha; and with that POW I'm gone! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as she ran towards Gary.

* * *

**Confessional: GAME FACT: POW blocks first appeared in the Mario series!**

**Gary: By the end of the two hours we had before Chris called us to perform our acts I think we put together something pretty good; I just hope Chris is impressed by this.**

**Chef: I wanted to be a judge; but pretty boy said I wasn't handsome enough, I can't help how I look! Stupid pretty boy having an ugly face of prejudice. **(Chef begins to mutter like Muttley the sniggering hound).

* * *

A few hours past and the camper's acts were ready to put on. Well; to give you a better picture Chris called over the intercom that their time was up and forced them to get ready to put on their acts whether or not they were ready. Yep; he is just that much of a jerk.

The fifteen campers sat around the bleachers by the amphitheatre and were waiting for Chris to arrive. Xaria was in a grumbly mood because of part of what she was required to do.

"You could have told me that Lupin and Sirius hugged each other you know." Said Xaria to Raven who was sat next to her.

"I'm sorry; but you and Oscar are good friends also I thought it would be ok; I mean, you wouldn't want to hug Kasimar would you?" Said Raven apologetically.

"Not a chance; I _seriously_ don't like that guy." Grumbled Xaria.

"Well at least this way you're hugging one of your friends. And it's too late to change our scene now so we'll have to make do." Said Raven as he tapped he fingers together. "Oh look; here comes Chris; I detected a change in the average smugness level in the area."

Chris walked out onto the stage and waved to the campers; nobody returned the wave, most of the campers had deadpan expressions or stony faces.

"What? Is nobody going to cheer for me?" Asked Chris with visible anger. "I'm the star of the show dammit! I deserve recognition!"

"Ok, seriously, you're like twenty six and you are having a temper tantrum like a child. Lame." Said Lavender with a smirk.

"Shut up!" Growled Chris as he took his seat in the judge panel by the amphitheatre. "Anyway; now that everybody knows I am here it is time for us to start the acts which I presume are going to be so dreadful that even the word dreadful won't be descriptive enough."

"Hey! We worked hard on making our respective acts good." Said Gary a little offended.

"Whatever midget cook." Yawned Chris in a bored voice. "I think the first team we shall see in action … is Team Grenade as they lost most recently. Let's see what you losers and Kasimar can do."

"You mean Kasimar isn't a loser yet we are?" Asked Mable angrily.

"What do you know! It has a brain! Haha!" Laughed Chris snidely as Team Grenade took the stage. "Ok then; so its Raven as Harry, Lavender as Hermione, Mable as Ron, Oscar as Sirius, Xaria as Lupin and Kasimar as Pettigrew. Let's see this act and hope I don't fall asleep."

The group assumed their positions with Kasimar going off stage. Mable took out a toy rat and held it as though it was real. Oscar then began to play his part.

"I thought you would come and help your friend and not alert the teachers. I thank you … it will make everything _much_ easier." Said Oscar in a hoarse vengeful voice.

Mable staggered to her feet as though she had a broken leg (and the character she was playing as did at that point in the series) and spoke as Lavender stood by her.

"If you want to kill Harry you'll have to kill us!" Said Mable bravely.

"Sit down; you'll hurt that leg even more." Said Oscar casually as he took a step closer.

"Didn't you hear me?" Asked Mable angrily. "You'll have to kill us if you want to kill Harry!"

"They'll only be one murder here tonight." Chuckled Oscar.

"What's the matter? You didn't mind when you killed all those muggles did you? Gone soft in Azkaban?" Asked Raven in a powerful voice as she got to her feet.

"Harry." Said Lavender pleadingly.

"He killed my mum and dad!" Roared Raven as she broke past Lavender and Mable and tackled Oscar to the ground.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no mum and dad! Boo hoo!**

**Oscar: to be honest I just let myself fall down; I've got a pretty good sense of balance so I don't think Raven could have knocked me down too easily by herself.**

**Raven: I hope I didn't end up hurting Oscar; but I'm sure he can take a little acting pain right?**

* * *

For the next thirty seconds Raven and Oscar were fighting, pretend fighting of course, while Mable collapsed to her feet again and Lavender pretended to kick Oscar as Hermione did to Sirius Black in the book.

"This is great." Smiled Chris. "Senseless violence is always fun! Haha!"

The sounds of footsteps were audible from backstage, it sounded like someone was coming.

"We're up here!" Yelled Lavender in pretend panic.

A moment later Xaria ran in dressed in some untidy cloths to match the outfit of Professor Lupin while Raven got off Oscar.

"Expellerarmous!" Yelled Xaria as she arrived on the stage. "Where is he Sirius?"

Oscar raised a hand and pointed it towards Mable.

"Then how come he has not shown himself until now, unless he was the one … and you switched … without telling me."

Oscar nodded weakly to stay in character. Xaria helped him to his feet; for a moment she was pulling without Oscar getting up and broke a sweat. Oscar got to his feet; both the two blushed in embarrassment and they hugged as was required in the act.

"I don't believe it!" Yelled Raven angrily.

"Harry; I can explain!" Said Xaria quickly.

"All this time; you and him … I trusted you!" Snarled Raven.

"Harry; it isn't like that, I can explain!" Said Xaria desperately.

"No! Harry; don't listen to him! He's been helping black get into the castle, he wants you dead too … he's a werewolf!" Said Lavender loudly and in panic.

"Not at all up to your usual standard Hermione; only one out of three. I haven't been helping Black get into the castle and I certainly don't want Harry dead … but I won't deny that I am a werewolf." Said Xaria with a shiver. "How did you know?"

"The moon essay Snape left us." Said Raven.

"Stop!" Yelled Chris while pressing an air horn.

"Aaargh! Are you trying to deafen me?" Groaned Eleanor as she held her ears. "that could have hurt!"

"And that would've been funny; anyway, I liked your act … but this is too close to the book! Try some originality why don't you? I therefore award you eight points since your acting _was_ pretty good … but that's it!"

"See; I told you she couldn't lead us." Said Kasimar smugly as he walked onto the stage. "Thanks to her thinking Chris was using reverse psychology on us we've lost a lot of chance for first place! Douche nozzles!"

Kasimar grumbled as he jumped off the stage and sat in the bleachers, though before going quiet he wiggled his large bushy eyebrow seductively at Quana. She looked away from the bully and focused her attention on the stage.

"We tried our best!" Said Mable as she got up. "Give us some credit!"

"Hmmm … No! Haha." Laughed Chris. "You score an eight; anymore complaining and I'll deduct it to a four! Next!"

With angry glares Team Grenade got off the stage and took seats amongst the bleachers; a few of them shot dirty looks at Chris but the host seemed not to care; that or he was too occupied picking his nose.

* * *

**Confessional: Everybody's a critic.**

**Raven: Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a leader. Well; at least if our team lose Kasimar is going to be voted off.**

**Mable: What bothers me is that Kasimar could go through and he hasn't even done anything; it happened in the fear challenge too. Chris is so biased!**

* * *

"Ok team Jungle; you show me what you've got!" Announced Chris as the four members of Team Jungle took the stage and got ready.

"Who is it that dares to invade my colony?" Asked Uzuri in a scary voice while in her spider costume. "Is that you Hagrid?"

"No; but we have been sent by Hagrid." Said Gary in a confident yet at the same time realistically scared voice. "Are you Aragog

" Yes I am; and why does Hagrid not come himself?" Asked Uzuri in the creepy voice.

"He has been taken away; he has been taken to Azkaban because the ministry of magic think he is the heir of slytherin because he opened the chamber fifty years ago." Said Gary while Vinnie began to tremble.

"I don't like this Harry." Whimpered Vinnie quietly as Tabitha, in the spider swarm costume, walked a few steps closer.

"Hagrid didn't open the chamber." Hissed Uzuri. "And I am not the monster either."

"But … if Hagrid didn't open the chamber of secrets … and if you are not the monster … then what is it?"

"The monster is a creature we arantula's fear above all else. A nasty creature made of evil and hatred." Whispered Uzuri quite hauntingly.

"So what is it?" Asked Gary cautiously.

"We do not speak of it; it is a complete taboo in our community." Said Uzuri as she shook herself which made the legs on the costume shake about. "The ministry are fools; Hagrid wouldn't release such a terrible creature. He raised me from when I was just an egg. After he released me he found me a wife, Mosag, and through his goodness our family has grown."

"I can see that." Gulped Vinnie as Tabitha moved another step forward. Uzuri in a spider costume wasn't remotely frightening but he had to play the part correctly.

"We want to eat. Let us eat them father." Said Tabitha in a beasty voice she put on by compressing her throat a little.

"Harry; I think that maybe we should go." Said Vinnie with a shudder.

"So if you weren't the monster, you didn't kill anyone and you won't speak of the monster … who was it that died?" Asked Gary as Tabitha closed in a little bit more.

"I've never killed anyone; just animals that wander too close to our home." Said Uzuri frostily. "A girl was killed by the monster of the chamber; she was found dead in a bathroom within the castle's walls."

"Bathroom?" Repeated Gary. "Wait … moaning myrtle."

"I don't like this Harry." Said Vinnie uneasily. "They're getting closer…"

"Well; thank you for the advice Aragog." Said Gary gratefully as he began to back away. "We'll just get back to the castle now."

"Go? I'm afraid not. I cannot deny my children the juicy, blood stained, tender human meat they crave! Teehee! Goodbye friends of Hagrid." Said Uzuri in a voice of absolute finality.

The group took a bow and awaited Chris's opinion. The audience clapped but Chris sat motionless.

"Ok … I'm afraid you have no chance of first place; that was just … pathetic." Said Chris with a look of disappointment.

"What was wrong with it?" Demanded gary. "I thought we did pretty well."

"Well two things stick out above all else. The first reason I didn't like it is because you left out the magical Ford Angela! I mean; duh!"

"Well where were we supposed to get one huh?" Retorted Vinnie.

"Not my problem metal arm limb Mike" Sneered Chris nastily. "The second problem … is completely Uzuri's fault."

"Me?" Asked Uzuri in surprise. "What did I do wrong?"

"You laughed! Spiders are incapable of laughing so I'll have to deduct points for such a glaringly obvious scientific inaccuracy! You get … six out of ten! Haha!" Smirked Chris.

Gary looked a tad miffed and Tabitha was quite angry; her hood stopped the others from seeing her immense anger. Uzuri looked a little upset that Chris was singling her out again and hung her head as she walked off the side of the stage. Vinnie walked by and put a hand on her shoulder for a moment.

"Don't let that asshole get you down; you did great." Smiled Vinnie kindly to his crush.

"…Thanks Vinnie." Smiled Uzuri sweetly.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't like prejudice; and Chris injected with it BIG time.**

**Tabitha: Is Chris TRYING to make me lose? Urgh! Just my luck to be placed on a team with freaks he likes to upset; I don't care about the discriminating off the social rejects but I think he's becoming too biased to be allowed.**

**Uzuri: That was nice of Vinnie to comfort me; he's a good friend. I would have liked to have known a few more people like him. I hope I don't get voted off for my mistake if we lose.**

* * *

"And now for the final team who hopefully won't bore me to tears … its Team Puzzle!" Said Chris as Team Puzzle walked on the stage. Barney, who now had a black wig and a leather jacket, walked in front of the others as they took their places, it seemed like they were in a class of some kind.

"My name is Professor Snape, I aim to teach you all the difficult and magnificent art of potions Though some of you will inevitably epically fail at this class … I have hope that some of you will achieve at least a passing grade. No … no WILL receive a passing grade … or _else_."

"So what can you teach us?" Asked Quana.

"I am mildly glad you asked my Miss Silva. I will teach you how to brew glory, simmer fame and maybe even how to put a stopper on death itself."

"But that's impossible! You can't do that." Said Eleanor skeptically.

"Well I'm afraid you are wrong Miss Brayton." Chuckled Barney. "But that's not all I can teach you."

Spider silently groaned in embarrassment of what he had to say. He swallowed his extremely scant pride and said his line.

"Hey Ron; smell *cough* my wand!" Said Spider in humiliation as he held up a twig that was supposed to be a magic wand.

Everyone started to laugh as Spider hung his head in silent shame.

* * *

**Confessional: What an innuendo!**

**Spider: What was barney thinking ***cough* **when he added that to the ***choke* **script? I hope my parents ***sneeze* **didn't see that.**

**Eleanor: I know I shouldn't laugh but that was pretty funny; poor Spider, he looked so embarrassed.**

* * *

He passed the wand to Jimmy who sniffed it and thought for a moment.

"Smells like anchovies." Said Jimmy in surprise.

"Oi! You two at the back! Are you listening to me?" Barked Barney.

"Well it's hard to listen *cough* to you when you hated *cough* my dad to death." Replied Spider.

"Well maybe I can change your mind; I can teach you how to tie your shoe laces." Smirked Barney.

"Everyone can do that." Said Eleanor.

"Maybe; but can everyone beat pacman? I can teach you how to do that too." Smirked Barney.

"That game is hard; I can't get past the title screen." Said Jimmy as Ron because in reality he could get past the title screen and to level two.

"And most of all I can teach you to score with _hot_ red headed babes." Said Barney with his trademark genki grin.

"What?" The other four said in fake surprise.

"Class dismissed." Said Barney with a swish of his jacket.

"But we didn't learn anything." Said Quana in exasperation.

"Oh … didn't you?" Said Barney as he walked to the edge of the stage.

"No! We didn't! What kind of a cut rate teacher are you?" Asked Quana.

"One that has a large female fan base." Replied Barney as he went backstage.

"Oh that Snape! Heheehee!" Laughed Jimmy.

The four took a bow as Barney came back on stage.

"What the heck … was that awesomeness?" Clapped Chris with a pleased smile. "You guys did great! Excellent!"

"But they hardly stayed true to the book!" Said Raven incredulously.

"But that was the point! Don't you see? I hate Harry Potter! Twilight is better; the whole point of the challenge was to put on a reenactment that was as different as possible from the scene it was based on and Team Puzzle did just that. And as such they get a perfect ten! Haha!"

"That is so unfair!" Growled Tabitha as she clenched her fists.

"Too bad too sad." Smirked Chris sadistically. "So Team Puzzle are the winners of the challenge and thus they get a prize. Today's prize is …

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A copy of each Harry Potter book; hopefully you'll enjoy it but if you don't it's no sin off my bones! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: The other day I read a book called Twilight … it #bleep# sucked!**

**Jimmy: I'm glad we won and all … but I'm not really sure if this win was fair or not. Chris didn't even tell us the proper rules until after the acts; what is that guy's problem?**

**Lavender: We may not have won but at least we've avoided elimination again. Still; it's not like I'm in any danger if we do lose; Kasimar is public enemy number one.**

* * *

"So that means Team Grenade are in second place and the team stays as it is. No prize and no vote off. But that leaves Team Jungle in last place and needing to vote someone off again; let's all point and laugh at them!"

Chris and Kasimar pointed and laughed but nobody else joined in. Chris noticed this and frowned.

"You guys have no sense of humor; but you are just pieces of crap compared to me, Chris Maclean, so it's understandable." Smirked Chris. "Team Jungle; you have three hours until the Bonfire ceremony. Pick your favorite loser and prepare to be knocked down to three people. Do as you all please until then because I have a massage in just a few minutes; see you later losers."

Chris got up from his seat and left the area; as he did so Lavender and Gary flipped him the bird but Chris didn't notice.

* * *

**Confessional: Drama on the horizon.**

**Tabitha: Ugh! We lost **_**again**_**! But this presents a problem; Uzuri is my ally so I can't vote for her, she has a crush on Vinnie so I can't vote for him and Gary cooks actually edible food so I can't vote for him. What should I do now; hmmmm.**

* * *

Tabitha exited the confessional and decided to go for a walk in the woods to make her decision. It was going to take some good manipulation to get rid of who she wanted without causing a tie.

"Uzuri won't vote for Vinnie but she might vote for Gary. But Vinnie won't vote for Gary as they're friends and Vinnie won't vote for Uzuri either so he'll vote for mew. And Gary won't vote for Uzuri because Vinnie might like her and he won't vote for Vinnie. He'll vote for me. This might be difficult."

Tabitha continued to aimlessly walk along for a few minutes while wondering what she could do. As she walked along she heard some voices nearby. Tabitha wondered recognized one voice as Gary … and the other was Raven which was a little odd. Tabitha followed the voices and hid behind a tree as she came to the source of them.

Gary and Raven were sitting side by side under a tree holding hands and were talking with each other.

"So your team lost again." Said Raven with a little worry. "What if they vote you off?"

"I think I'll be safe." Said Gary reassuringly. "If they want to keep eating the best food then they'll keep me on; and I'm useful as a team mate. I think I'll still be here tomorrow."

"You always have a positive attitude." Smiled Raven. "And that's another reason I love you."

"Thanks Ravy; but I wonder who is going to get voted off; I think it is likely there will be a tie."

"Well if you do get voted off here's something to remember me by." Said Raven lovingly as she gave Gary a kiss.

Tabitha had watched all this and scowled darkly and silently slipped away back to camp leaving Gary and Raven unaware they had been watched.

* * *

**Confessional: I have a feeling some bad stuff is about to go down.**

**Tabitha: Sooooo … Gary has hooked up with the former shy girl from another team and he's been hiding it has he? If there is one thing I don't like it is people keeping things from me and a betrayal of team trust. I think I know who I'm going to vote for now because lets face it; separating couples is fun. But I have to guarantee he leaves … and I know just how to do that. **(Tabitha grins evilly).

* * *

Kasimar was leaning against a tree a little outside of camp smoking a cigarette; he had been told he couldn't smoke before he had set foot on the Island; but after a while he decided he didn't care and thus smoked where there weren't any cameras. He had checked the area and found none so he knew that it was safe to smoke a drag.

"Yeah; that's good." Said Kasimar as he exhaled some smoke. "I wonder if I could blow some smoke into Lavender or Jimmy's faces; that'd be funny, Yahahaha!"

Kasimar smoked in silence for another minute before the sound of foot steps entered his ears and he quickly extinguished the cigarette and tossed it to the floor.

"Who's there?" Grunted Kasimar. "#bleep# off if you know what's good for you."

Tabitha walked out of the overgrowth and approached Kasimar.

"What do you want?" Asked Kasimar rudely.

"I'm just here to talk; nothing to do with blackmail or possibly getting you voted off." Said Tabitha smoothly.

"Well; what do you want to talk about?" Grunted Kasimar as he crossed his arms gruffly.

"I have a little problem and I think you can help with it." Said Tabitha making sure to sound casual.

"What's the problem? And why would I care? It's not my problem is it?" Smirked Kasimar.

"Maybe not; but I do know you like causing pain and if you help me you could really hurt someone."

At the prospect of causing pain Kasimar grew interested.

"Go on." Said Kasimar.

"Well I am on the chopping block tonight and to make sure I don't leave there is a certain person on my team who needs to … go away." Smirked Tabitha. "Basically if you, well, rough the person up to the point he gets either pity votes or booted by default I'll help you avoid elimination in the future. A little you scratch my back I scratch yours."

"So you basically want me to pulverize someone then." Said Kasimar with a nasty smile. "Sounds good … but I'd like a benefit in the short term, I don't work for free, and this ain't charity you know."

"I thought you might say that; and I always come prepared." Said Tabitha as she reached into her pocket and pulled out a large wad of bills. "That's two hundred dollars right there; help me … and it's yours."

"…What the hell; I'm convinced. In fact; I like you already. That disposable villain Wallace was right, you are evil." Smirked Kasimar as Tabitha handed him the money which he pocketed. "So; who is the person I need to beat up? The sadistic freak? The guy with a metal arm? Or the sissy chef?"

"The chef; and if you keep helping me in the future there is more money where that came from." Promised Tabitha. "Just don't show anyone the money; they might trace it back to me."

"No problem; I think I'm gonna enjoy this. Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar.

"Oh; and if you pinch someone on the back of their neck on the pressure points then they will be unable to move; just a pointer." Said Tabitha as she began to leave back to camp.

"Gotcha; this'll be fun." Cackled Kasimar as he left into the woods.

"Like domino's everything is falling together." Chuckled Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: Double trouble!**

**Kasimar: This should be a good work out; I doubt the chef will be any problem to beat.**

* * *

Gary was walking back to camp; Raven had gone a different way so nobody would see them together; after a small kissing session they had decided to get back to camp before anybody got suspicious. Gary walked along with his hands in his pocket and a smile on his face.

"It's been a good day." Smiled Gary. "Too bad I've got a Bonfire Ceremony to go to. Hopefully I'll survive it."

"And it's my job to make sure you don't." Said a cruel sounding voice from behind a tree nearby. A moment later Kasimar revealed himself and had his hands baled into fists.

"What do you want Kasimar? And what do you mean it's your 'job' to make sure I don't survive the Ceremony." Asked Gary with a scowl at the bully.

"Straightforwardly I have been … 'requested' to eliminate you." Smirked Kasimar as he walked towards Gary.

"Oh; you're going to beat me up? Is that all you ever think about?" Asked Gary in disgust as he raised his fists in preparation for the fight.

"Well its not that I hate you … actually, I do, but it's my current assignment." Said Kasimar as he stood but a single meter in front of Gary.

"Bring it on then queer bait! I have actually had fighting lessons." Said Gary despite inwardly feeling a little worried.

"With pleasure." Said Kasimar condescendingly as he threw a punch at Gary.

Gary rolled to the right and punched Kasimar in the arm with all his might. Kasimar ducked under the next punch and gave Gary an uppercut. The smaller fighter was knocked back but right hooked Kasimar in the gut as though nothing had happened. Kasimar didn't like this, not one bit, and punched Gary again.

"Ready to throw in the towel?" Sneered Kasimar.

"No way!" Growled Gary as he reared back and punched Kasimar in the eye with his fist.

"AAAAAAAARGH!" Wailed Kasimar as he staggered and held his eye in pain. When he removed his hand Gary saw that his attacker had a real shiner, in other words a very noticeable black eye. "You little rat!"

Kasimar tackled Gary and pinned him while delivering a row of five punches to his chest. Gary shoved Kasimar off and got back to his feet as did Kasimar. Gary charged at Kasimar and left crossed him in the gut. Kasimar was quite surprised at this turn of events.

"_How is this whelp still standing? Everyone I've ever beaten up has been beginning for mercy by now_!" Thought Kasimar as he dodged another punch. "_Well; I didn't get to where I am today by not fighting dirty_."

Kasimar dodged what would have been a finishing blow and restrained Gary from behind and cackled.

"You're a good fighter." Complimented Kasimar before smirking wickedly. "But not good enough!"

Kasimar pinched Gary in a certain place on the back of his neck and instantly Gary's body seized up and he dropped to the ground unable to move.

"What did you just do?" Asked Gary in surprise and a little fear. "Fighting dirty? What a coward!"

"I'm … not … a … COWARD!" Roared Kasimar as he readied himself. "Let's see you stomp berries after this!"

Kasimar backed up and then charged forwards, leapt into the air and slammed down, elbow first, onto Gary's legs … hard. Two cracks were heard as Gary screamed in extreme pain.

"Well; looks like my work here is done, if you're lucky they'll have some good medical at the playa … or maybe they'll ship you home to mummy and daddy! Yahahaha!" Sneered Kasimar as he kicked Gary with his metal boots and walked off calmly into the woods and left Gary on the ground.

Gary tried to get up but couldn't; his legs had been broken by that particularly hard slam. His lower body had never been as strong as his upper body. Gary groaned in pain.

"Help!" Called Gary while trying to ignore the pain.

A few minutes passed after which Oscar and Raven entered the clearing; instantly raven wailed in horror and ran to Gary while Oscar quickly followed. Raven hugged Gary tightly and looked really horrified.

"Gary! Are you ok? Who did this to you?" Asked Raven I panic.

"It … was Kasimar." Groaned Gary.

"What?" Asked Oscar in shock. "He stooped this low?"

"Oscar; get Gary back to camp and quick!" Said Raven while feeling a little light headed due to the state her boyfriend was in.

"No problem." Nodded Oscar as he picked up Gary gently over his shoulder as he quickly set off back to camp with raven following.

"You'll be ok Gary; oh I hope you will be." Said Raven with immense worry.

"Hey raven; you seem pretty concerned about Gary … are you and him … together?" Asked Oscar as they ran along.

"There's no point in hiding it any longer … yes, we are." Said Raven with a sigh at the current situation.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Asked Oscar.

"I'll take that question. We were afraid of something like … this, happening." Said Gary as he clenched his teeth from the pain.

"That's it; the gloves are coming off; Kasimar is _going down_." Snarled Raven.

* * *

**Confessional: Appalled doesn't begin to describe how I feel.**

**Oscar: I seriously underestimated Kasimar; Xaria was right about him. We aren't dealing with a bully here … we're dealing with a **_**monster**_**.**

* * *

Gary sat in a wheelchair in the medical tent as Chef Hatchet applied cats to his legs. All the other campers including Kasimar were there. Raven was next to Gary holding his hand and looked very upset at what had happened and disgusted at Kasimar.

"Why did you do this you monster?" Asked Raven in fury.

"Because it was funny; why else?" Smirked Kasimar.

"Do you have no shame? No regret?" Asked Lavender with a snarl.

"…No; not really, people get hurt everyday. Gary is just one of many, why should I care?" Said Kasimar indifferently. "Now if you douche nozzles will excuse me I think I'll have a lie down. Later."

Kasimar left the medical tent to his cabin while everyone else looked at Gary and Raven in sympathy.

"This must be terrible *cough* for you Raven; nobody *cough* should have to go through *sneeze* this." Said Spider as he uneasily glanced at Kasimar as he left. "But he's going to pay for *cough* this."

"Right on Spider; the longer he is here the worse he is going to get." Agreed Quana.

Just then Chris entered the medical tent with a smile that did not match the mood.

"Boy Gary; that looks painful … did it hurt?" Asked Chris.

"Of course it did." Said Gary in a very deadpan tone.

"Well I would just like to tell Team Jungle that the Bonfire Ceremony is in fifteen minutes so you had better get casting your votes." Said Chris. "But even if nobody leaves I think this episode is the most dramatic yet! Haha!"

"You actually find this funny?" Asked Xaria in disgust.

"Only a little." Smirked Chris. "Now come; time to cast your votes and boot someone out."

The members of Team Grenade and Team Puzzle besides Raven cleared out of the tent while the others stayed for a moment.

"Well; looks like this is the end for me." Sighed Gary. "Shame really, I would have liked to have gotten a bit further."

"You might not go." Said Raven even though she knew he probably would. "If you do go I'm really going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too Raven." Said Gary with a sad smile.

Raven gave Gary a kiss on the lips and left the tent.

"Good luck." She said with a reassuring smile.

* * *

**Confessional: Voting time again.**

**Tabitha: And so my plan has come together; I stay another day and someone else takes the fall and someone else is sad. Added bonus. Still; we'll have to eat chef's cooking now … well; a small price to pay for an eventual victory. It's painfully obvious but I vote Gary.**

**Vinnie: I'm voting for Gary. It's a shame since he is a god friend and supports my liking of Uzuri … but it wouldn't be a nice thing to keep him here with those injuries. Sorry buddy.**

**Gary: I think it's pretty obvious that I'm going to go. But in the unlikely case I stay … I vote for Tabitha. It's just that Vinnie is my friend and he likes Uzuri so I can't vote for them.**

* * *

Tabitha, Vinnie, Gary and Uzuri, the last four members of Team Jungle, sat on stumps around the fire, or in Gary's case in a wheelchair. Gary hung his head and looked at the crackling flames. Tabitha looked confident and looked at Gary for a moment with fake pity. Vinnie and Uzuri felt sorry for their friend but couldn't change their votes now even if they wanted to.

Chris strode up with a tray holding three marshmallows; he set it down on the oil drum and looked over the four campers in front of him and laughed.

"This is rich! You guys have no lost over half of your team; once you have three members you'll have almost no chance of winning challenges! Haha!" Smirked Chris. "Some of you might just have a chance at going far … but then again you may be voted off tomorrow! Well; I can't really postpone the inevitable, so let's start handing out the marshmallows."

Chris picked up the first marshmallow between his index finger and his thumb and looked over the campers.

"When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk … or wheel, the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means you are out … and you can't come back … ever."

"The first marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

Uzuri.

Uzuri smiled as she got up from her stump and claimed her marshmallow. She smiled apologetically at Gary as Chris picked up another marshmallow.

"The second marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

Vinnie.

Vinnie got up and took his marshmallow; he had an almost certain idea of who was leaving and it was a shame really.

"Campers … this is the final marshmallow of the night. Whoever doesn't get it must immediately walk pr wheel down the dock of shame and board the boat of losers and leave the island *forever*."

"Could you stop waffling Chris?" Asked Tabitha as she sat on her stump before telling a lie. "I think it is quite obvious who is going even though he doesn't really deserve to leave."

"No!" snapped Chris. "These ceremonies are the most exciting part of the show. Anyway; the final marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Tabitha."

Tabitha nodded and got up from her seat and collected the final marshmallow and gave an apologetic look to Gary.

Gary sighed from his wheelchair as he had been voted off; he had seen it coming but he still felt disappointed.

"Well I kind of saw this coming." Shrugged Gary. "And I'm probably not too useful with these injuries am I?"

"I just didn't want Kasimar coming back for round two on you." Said Uzuri. "But it wasn't so bad; you've got a girlfriend right?"

"True." Smiled Gary.

"Yeah; too bad she's probably going to be Kasimar's next target. Now to the dock with you; no losers allowed on Wawanakwa! Haha!" Smirked Chris nastily.

Gary took a deep breath and wheeled over to Chris so he was right in front of him.

"Hey Chris; guess what?" Asked Gary with a frown.

"What?" Asked Chris dully.

"Think fast!"

BAM!

Gary punched Chris full force in the gut and knocked the wind out of him as he lay whimpering and gasping on the ground.

"Now I have no regrets." Smirked Gary triumphantly.

"That's our Gary!" Giggled Uzuri.

"Nice one dude!" Smiled Vinnie while inwardly laughing at Chris on the ground.

"I hope you get better soon Gary." Lied Tabitha. "But at least you'll be able to relax at the playa right?

"True; well, good luck everyone. You were all great friends and team mates." Said Gary in farewell as he slowly wheeled himself towards the dock of shame. "And make sure Kasimar loses."

Once he arrived chef lowered a ramp so Gary could get on the boat of losers. With a final wave of farewell the boat left and with it so did team jungle's good meals.

"Well; we're down to three now." Said Vinnie. "And I'm the only guy left."

"Don't worry; I think if we work together we can do anything … now lets get some sleep." Said Tabitha. "Tomorrows challenge may be even worse than the torture challenge."

As the three remaining members of Team Jungle left back to their cabin Chris got up from the ground looking in pain.

"Owey! Who does that cripple think he is? I am Chris Maclean! I deserve respect and worship!" Said Chris angrily before dusting himself off and smiling. "So that ends day eleven. Gary has been voted off and now Team Jungle are down to three. What will the next challenge be? Will Kasimar last much longer? Will Tabitha ever be found out? And can I get anymore awesome? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!

Votes

* * *

Gary- Tabitha

Tabitha- Gary

Uzuri- Gary

Vinnie- Gary

Gary- 3

Tabitha- 1

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary.

And then there were fourteen. Gary is now gone due to an injury and Team Jungle only has three members left. Meanwhile Kasimar has crossed the moral event horizon; what will he do next? All in all it's been quite a dramatic chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it.

Next time: Animal wrangling and some gifts from home … in what might be one of the most emotional episodes.


	25. Day 12, Part 1, Presents from home

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or the season that must never be named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please don't steal them.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains snide bullying, a complete monster of a host, crying and a dark past revelation. Some parts are tear jerking but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven** VinniexUzuri and OscarxXaria

**Note: **This chapter is a little sad and emotional, particularly at the end. Younger viewers might get upset so be warned. The next chapter will have a happy resolution so stay tuned for that.

Here we go!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame dressed in a safari ranger outfit. He also had leather boots and a presumably fake rifle. He flashed his grin for the camera and threw his arms up dramatically.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was a magical challenge that would put Gandalf the grey or white to shame. The teams had to reenact scenes from the Harry Potter books and try not to make them suck. Gary and Raven both had knowledge of the Harry Potter series so it looked like Team Puzzle was sure to lose. But this was going to be far from a normal day; haha!

"The teams began to choose what scenes they would reenact; Team Puzzle chose Harry's first class with Snape, Team Grenade chose Harry's confrontation with Sirius Black and Team Jungle decided to go with Harry and Ron's encounter with Aragog the giant spider monster. Not bad choices but would the acts be any good? For the most part not quite."

"While the teams rehearsed Quana suggested Team Puzzle take a break for doughnuts. As she went to her cabin to get them she came across a love note that unknown to her was from Spider; she looked pretty heart warmed by it. Why do semi decent people always show signs of falling for the rejects? Well; Nakia is right, Spider and Quana hooking up would be bad!"

"Eventually the time came for the acts to be performed, with the wonderful me as the judge. Tem Grenade went first; they did pretty good and were quite accurate to the book … WAY to accurate! As such I stopped them mid act because quite frankly I don't want to here the same crap I've already read before. I awarded them an eight out of ten."

"Team Jungle didn't fair so well even with Gary's Harry Potter fanboyism. While the scene was decent enough they made one really glaring blatant mistake. Uzuri laughed and she was playing Aragog. And as everyone who is anyone knows; spiders do not laugh! They have no laugh box, it's not allowed, not a possibility. I gave them a measly six out of ten to teach them a lesson for their inaccuracy! Haha!"

"It was then Team Puzzle's turn and against the immense odds … they succeeded and then some. It was the general funniness and inaccuracy to the books that let them nab the victory. The other teams thought that this was unfair but I didn't give a damn because I'm Chris Maclean, the best guy in the universe! Haha! So that left Team Puzzle in first, Team Grenade in second and Team Jungle in last place and having to vote off a fifth person from their team. Those guys just suck don't they! Haha!"

"Tabitha was worried that there would be a tie in the votes and a chance of her going home. While taking a walk in the woods to think of a plan she stumbled across Gary and Raven talking to each other and saw them kiss. Tabitha instantly figured out about the secret relationship and resolved to get Gary voted off. She found Kasimar and offered him two hundred dollars in exchange for him beating the crap out of Gary. Excited at the prospect of causing pain … Kasimar accepted."

"Kasimar confronted Gary and they got into a no holds barred brawl. Kasimar won by pinching one of Gary's pressure points. After that he slammed elbow first onto Gary's legs and broke them. He left the scene and a while later Oscar and Raven found Gary. He was given a wheelchair and leg casts as Team Jungle headed for the ceremony."

"Tabitha's plan worked; Gary was voted off three to one though before he left that little rat had the nerve to punch me! What a little wretch!"

Chris took a deep breath and smiled again.

"Who will be the next to walk the dock of shame? Who will feel the call of the wild? And will anybody else get injured? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme Song; I wanna be famous).

* * *

Oscar and Kasimar were in their side of the Team Grenade cabin late at night; Oscar was laying awake thinking on his bunk and Kasimar lay across from him flicking his lighter on and off every couple of seconds. Oscar cast a dirty disgusted look at Kasimar every now and then but Kasimar seemed not to care or just didn't notice.

Oscar was thinking about Xaria, the girl he had started to gain a crush on. When he first met her she complained about almost everything and had quite a sour negative attitude. He had voted for her on the first day … but now he felt ashamed he had done so as upon getting to know her she was actually quite a nice girl with a bit of a negative outlook on life and a seemingly troubled past of some kind. Oscar guessed it was bullying; the type of thing he had suffered in his youth before he began working out, another reason of his immense dislike of Kasimar. Oscar couldn't deny it to himself… he cared about Xaria.

"Gonna sit there fantasizing all day are you steroid man?" Asked Kasimar as he flicked his lighter again.

"I'm not fantasizing you sick bastard." Said Oscar in disdain. "I was simply thinking about things."

"Like what? Girls?" Asked Kasimar with interest in his demonic black eyes.

"None of your business." Said Oscar firmly.

"Like that matters to me." Scoffed Kasimar. "Besides; if you want someone to talk to I'm your only option; Carlton and Wallace are _long_ gone."

"You'd sooner find me talking pleasantly to a Nazi than to someone like you." Said Oscar as he turned over to try and ignore Kasimar.

"Well fine; not my problem, besides; I don't think you are going to last much longer. A big muscular guy is going to be quite a threat once the merge arrives." Taunted Kasimar. "You may be safe while the teams are still here but they're going to merge sooner or later."

"Seriously; do you have a life outside of trying to upset people? You are pathetic." Snapped Oscar.

"Of course I have a life outside of it; I vandalize property, I play X-box, I go out for curry, I pulverize nerds." Listened Kasimar. "And I bring so the most drama to the show so chances are Chris is going to keep me around a while longer."

"I don't even want to think about what kind of parents raised you." Said Oscar simply. "Just so you know; what goes around comes around. Eventually your karma is going to catch up with you; when it does you're going to be _really_ sorry."

"Phfft! I've never been sorry for anything in my life; and once I have the million I think I could buy a tank so I can blow shit up." Smirked Kasimar sadistically.

"I find it very unsettling that you don't show any remorse for what you did to Gary." Growled Oscar. "You broke the poor guy's legs! It'll take quite a while for them to heal even with the Playas medical care! Did you see how upset Raven was?"

"Yeah I did; funny wasn't it." Chuckled Kasimar. "I wonder what the other girls crying would sound like. Xaria's would be funny; pathetic and pitiful, just like her. Yahahaha!"

"I suggest for your own safety you don't insult my friends." Snarled Oscar while also thinking. "_And the one I … love_."

"Why not? Oooo; does that upset the muscle man! Boo hoo; are you gonna cry? Yahaha! Xaria and you are a little similar; you are both accidents that were the result of something like rape."

"Don't push me." Warned Oscar.

"What are you gonna do about it hmmm?" Asked Kasimar tauntingly. "Just go back to mommy and cry about the big scary bully who made you cry!" Yahaha!"

"That's it! Its go time!" Roared Oscar as he leapt out of bed.

From outside the cabin the sounds of punching, screaming and general racket were heard for a few moments. A second later the door opened and Kasimar was thrown out face first into the ground. As he got to his knees with a groan Oscar slammed the door shut, locked it and pulled down the blinds.

"Hey! Let me in you #bleep# coward!" Yelled Kasimar as he began banging on the door with his fists.

"Peace at last." Smiled Oscar to himself as he put some earmuffs over his ears, lay down and closed his eyes.

* * *

**Confessional: Sleeping outside must be cold.**

**Oscar: Kasimar called me a coward did he? Well if he wants to see a real coward he should look in the mirror. Maybe a night out in the cold will teach him a lesson. If not then he'll at least have a cold.**

**Kasimar: **(He looks displeased and angry). **I had to spend the night under a friggin tree! I always hated camping, what with the tents and caravans, and that was even worse! Well; at least it gave me a bit of time to think about my next move in this game.**

* * *

Raven lay on her bed sadly thinking about the events of the day; her boyfriend was gone and it was all because of Kasimar. How could be not feel any remorse for what he had done? Raven sighed sadly and angrily to herself; Kasimar was going to pay, she didn't care if it took a day, to the merge, to around the final six or seven or even the finals, he was going to get his karma.

"Are you ok Raven?" Asked Mable in concern.

"I'm ok; or at least I think I am." Said Raven as she sat up. "I just wish Gary were still here."

"He would want you to keep going; we all know you are a tough girl." Said Mable supportively from her bed. "Don't worry too much; he's going to get what he deserves sooner or later. And Gary is going to get the necessary medical treatment at the playa; and if you manage to get to the finals he'll be there cheering for you all the way."

"Thanks Mable." Smiled Raven in appreciation. "You're pretty good at making people feel better."

"Thanks; it comes from having two younger sisters." Said Mable with a smile. "Maybe if I win the big prize I could take them out for a celebratory fruit smoothie."

"You have siblings?" Said Raven in a little surprise. "I don't recall you mentioning that before."

"Nobody asked." Said Mable simply. "Their names are Lola and Ginny; both of them haven't hit double digits yet. They sometimes come to me for help with things because I'm the big sister. I miss them but I'll see them soon. So; do any of you have siblings?"

"Nope; I'm an only child." Said Raven from her bed. "Maybe if I'd had a brother or a sister to talk to I wouldn't have been so shy."

"Same here." Said Lavender with a yawn. "But it's probably easier if you're the only child, no need to compete to get the best present for your parents birthdays or jealously over who has the best Christmas presents."

"Well; I suppose that is kinda true; but there is a lot of fun to be had if you have siblings." Said Mable with a smile to herself. "What about you Xaria? Do you have a brother or sister?"

Xaria had been hoping they wouldn't ask her but now they had. Well; hopefully they wouldn't question her extensively.

"Yes; I have an older sister." Said Xaria with an inward frown.

"Really? What's her name, what is she like?" Asked Mable with interest.

"That's not important." Replied Xaria quietly. "Let's just say we have a … strained relationship."

"Do you mean that you fight?" Asked Lavender hesitantly.

"As I said … not important." Said Xaria as she turned over to face away from her bunk mates.

* * *

**Confessional: Something the matter? It looks like it.**

**Xaria: Ever since Jaron joined that gang things changed; and then she became the leader. **(Xaria shudders).

**Lavender: I wonder what Xaria's sister is like? From Xaria's reaction to our question I'd say she isn't too nice … but it is not my business.**

**Raven: Mable is right; I have to keep going. Gary would want me to … he'd also want me to make Kasimar pay. I'm not afraid of him but something tells me defeating him might be easier said than done.**

**Mable: The way I see it Kasimar is in a pretty bad situation; everyone on this team hates him so he'll be the next to go. And if we get to the merge without another loss then he's going to be gone pretty quickly being that he has no friends or allies. I'm pretty disgusted at what he did to Gary; and he wasn't even sorry … that boy is seriously messed up in the head.**

* * *

The three Team Puzzle guys were in their beds after another day of escaping elimination. While Barney relaxed in his bunk feeling content with a satisfactory result to the day Spider and Jimmy looked like they had some things on their minds.

"You ok me hearties?" Asked Barney from his top bunk as he raised his hat from over his eyes. "Why aren't you smiling? We won!"

"We may have won but was it completely fair?" Asked Jimmy from his bunk below Spider.

"How so?" Inquired Barney as he looked down at his younger team mate.

"Well; we won by differing from the book so much. That's not bad; but the other teams lost because they were more true to the books and Chris didn't tell them the rules properly. I just think it wasn't exactly fair." Explained Jimmy.

"I understand; but the thing is you shouldn't feel bad about it; nobody knew, it could have gone either way. And besides, I don't think Chris is ever going to be fair in this game, especially once the merge arrives Yaaaaar." Said Barney with a sigh.

"Why do you say that?" Asked Jimmy.

"Because Chris is going to *cough* pull out all the stops *cough* to eliminate those he doesn't like *sneeze* such as Lavender and Uzuri. He *cough* might even give Kasimar a free pass." Explained Spider with an unhappy expression. "Why do nasty people always go *cough* far?"

"I asked myself that when Duncan got to the final four last season and Heather got to the final three." Lamented Jimmy.

"But they lost didn't they savvy?" Smiled Barney. "Trust me; you guys have nothing to worry about. And if that shark bait anglerfish Kasimar gets to the finals I will happily eat my underwear, with or without ketchup."

"I … don't think I *cough* want to see that." Said Spider with an expression of amusement and disgust at the idea.

"So what are you thinking about Spider me rusty sailor?" Asked Barney.

"I'm just worried about*cough* my personal safety." Said Spider as he wrung his hands nervously. "I have two people who *cough* want to kill me!"

"I don't think anyone would want to do such a terrible sin to you Spider." Said Jimmy quickly. "Who do you think wants to kill you anyway?"

"Kasimar and *cough* Nakia. I've stood up to Kasimar before and *cough*, well, you saw what he did to *sneeze* Gary! I could leave paralyzed from *cough* the neck down! And Nakia vowed revenge on *cough* me. I don't know why but something *choke* about her really unnerves me."

"I've had experience with bullies before; back home there is this punk teen called Earl who likes to upset the younger people. He's not anywhere near as bad as Kasimar but I've learned something from him." Said Jimmy with a smile.

"What's that?" Asked Spider glumly.

"Bullies are cowards and you've just got to believe in yourself to stand up to them. If you don't show them you aren't afraid then they will walk on you forever." Explained jimmy. "Of course; I always hang around with Ted, Pablo, Ricky and Charles so I'm never gotten by myself … but you're older, I'm sure you can take care of yourself well enough."

"The cabin boy is right Spider me sailor bob, just be brave." Said Barney like some sort of motivational speaker before grinning. "And by the way; even if you don't win the money you _might_ just win something else."

"Good point; there's *cough* that as well." Said Spider with a cough and a smile.

"What do you guys mean?" Asked Jimmy curiously.

"Oh nothing; nothing at all." Chuckled Barney with a wink to Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: But we know what it is, don't we?**

**Spider: Jimmy may only be ten but ***cough* **he really knows how to make someone ***cough* **feel better. If I could lose to anyone ***cough* **it would be Jimmy … and Quana as ***cough* **well. **(Spider smiles to himself).

**Jimmy: It felt good to help Spider back then … but I am kinda worried being on the same island as Kasimar; he really went too far when he broke Gary's legs. I just have to have faith that the other members of Team Grenade will get rid of him.**

**Barney: After all that has happened the last eleven days I think it is fair to say we're al in hot water yaaaar. I hope none of my friends end up like Gary, poor guy, he didn't deserve that, nobody does savvy? **(He looks series and angry). **And if Kasimar even lays a finger on Lavender I'll **_**destroy**_** him.**

* * *

Eleanor and Quana were in their bottom bunk beds in their side of the Team Puzzle cabin reading the Harry Potter books they had been given. They were both currently reading copies of the book 'Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone'. While Eleanor was pretty engrossed in the well written book Quana had other things on her mind.

"_Its been a whole day and the feeling hasn't even began to disappear. Could it be possible that I'm in love … with Spider_?" Though Quana to herself while only half paying attention to what she was reading. "_But there is the love note; who sent that? This is so confusing; I like Spider and someone else likes me … unless the note was from Spider. But that's unlikely; what to do_?"

"Wow; I never would have suspected Quirrel of all people." Said Eleanor in surprise at what she had just read. "I wonder if Harry will defeat him."

"You've got pretty far in the book haven't you?" Said Quana as she noticed how many pages Eleanor had gotten through.

"Yep; I'm a fast reader." Explained Eleanor as she turned another page. "What page are you up to?"

"To be honest I've kind of gotten sidetracked from reading." Said Quana. "I've been thinking again."

"About Spider?" Asked Eleanor with a smile.

"Yes; well, that and some other things." Blushed Quana. "That funny feeling hasn't gone away yet, it feels just as strong as before. I think I like him; really like. And also..."

"Also what?" Inquired Eleanor. "Something else? You don't like another guy at the same time do you?"

"No; nothing like that. But I think another guy might like me…" Said Quana as she trailed off again.

"You mean Kasimar? Is that creep still upsetting you?" Asked Eleanor gently and angrily at the thought of the chaotic evil bully. "I could get Oscar to sort him out."

"Its not him this time. I … well; take a look at this." Said Quana as she passed Eleanor the note she had found earlier.

Eleanor read through the note and was smiling by the time she had finished reading it.

"Sounds like whoever wrote this really likes you." Giggled Eleanor. "Must be nice having someone really like you like this."

"I know; but I like Spider and I wouldn't want to hurt the feelings of the person who wrote this." Explained Quana. "What's more … there could be a tiny possibility Kasimar wrote it and I wouldn't want to start to crush on the writer if it was _him_."

"Don't worry about it; love is a very wonderful and magical thing. It has a way of sorting everything out in the end. You might end up being with that special someone and not having to turn down anyone … that might be wishful thinking but as a friend I tell you to not worry."

"Thank you Eleanor." Smiled Quana as she pulled the bed covers over herself. "After what has happened today I think I could do with a good sleep. Night Eleanor."

"Night Quana." Said Eleanor as she settled down to sleep as well.

* * *

**Confessional: If I had a girlfriend she'd be thin, tan and pretty … with a ponytail!**

**Quana: When I joined this show I never thought I'd fall in love with someone. All I wanted was to get noticed and maybe win the prize … but now I'm aiming for something more.**

**Eleanor: It may be surprising that I know a seemingly immense amount about love … but it comes natural when you own a collection of Disney films, each having some form of love in them.**

* * *

Tabitha and Uzuri were in their beds thinking about the day that had gone by. While Uzuri lay sleepily in her bed wondering how Gary was doing at the playa Tabitha was on her bunk with a sheet of paper. It was the one that had pictures of all the campers besides Tabitha and so far twelve faces had been crossed out, most recently Gary. Tabitha surveyed the pictures wondering who to target next.

"_Ok then; let's see. Twelve of my competition have bit the dust, that's just about half of them. But who to go for next? Kasimar and Uzuri are on my side so that means I won't have to worry about them. Vinnie is on the team so he's safe … for now. Spider is just a sick loser, no threat at all and Jimmy and Eleanor are too young to possibly pose a threat to my chances. But Barney and Raven might be harder. After what has happened to Gary Raven is going to want revenge … but Barney seems to be the leader of team Puzzle and he's generally very well liked. Well; I could easily manipulate Eleanor into voting for Barney and maybe I could get Kasimar to hurt Raven as well; lord knows he has no problems hurting people on international TV whether they are guys or girls, teens or children."_

"What are you thinking about Tabitha? You look like you are concentrating really hard." Yawned Uzuri from her bed.

"I'm just strategizing; our team is down to three now; do you know what that means?"

"Hmmmm." Thought Uzuri. "Does it mean that since all of us are very close it is going to be tough to choose who to vote for?"

"Not quite … though that is also completely true." Said Tabitha as giving her pawn a compliment would keep her loyal. "I was thinking that we're even worse off than we were before; we have three people left on the team while team Puzzle has five and Team grenade has six. Its going to be hard to win challenges now."

"Not impossible though." Pointed out Uzuri with another yawn. "Nothing is impossible, only improbable … though surviving a decapitation might be the exception."

"Yes; quite." Said Tabitha inwardly groaning at the inattentiveness of her bunk mate. "The point is that we're in a bit of a tight spot at the moment; we have to make sure we come second at least in any challenges before the merge from now on. Failure is not an option; do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Yep; keep winning and don't lose, gotcha." Nodded Uzuri as she lay down. "What I'm thinking about though is, well, what happened to Gary. How could Kasimar do that?"

"I really don't know." Lied Tabitha in fake unease. "His mind must be clouded."

"What does that mean?" Asked Uzuri as she laid her head on her pillow.

"It means he's borderline psychotic." Explained Tabitha. "Call me crazy but I have a bad feeling that he is going to get even worse as time goes on. We can only hope he gets voted off soon."

"I think he will." Smiled Uzuri. "He's on a team where everyone hates him; next time Team Grenade loses he'll be voted off, and if we're lucky the boat will sink and he will down."

"A tad too far but I understand your point." Said Tabitha as she lay down.

"Goodnight Tabitha; don't let the eldritch abominations of the night rip your spine out! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as she closed her eyes.

"Err … ok." Said Tabitha while feeling disturbed and exasperated at her bunk mate as she turned off the lamp.

* * *

**Confessional: Enter the minds of the strategic and the slightly crazy.**

**Uzuri: Kasimar is kinda scary; and it is pretty hard to scare me. Stuff like pyramid head, zombies, Freddie Krueger and even SAW doesn't scare me at all. The only reason electrocution used to scare me was because of the AMPS. They are one of the only things that can hurt me like they would anyone else. Nobody bullies me at school; it's either because they are scared of me or because when they tried to smack or punch me it just creates a pleasant tingle.**

**Tabitha: I say Kasimar might get worse because I have intentions of paying him to maul anyone who either annoys me, disrespects me or is simply a threat. Either way it's a better deal for me because in the end every ally is expendable. I'll be in the finals with someone easy to beat and the money will be mine. One by one … they'll ALL go down. **(Tabitha grins evilly).

* * *

Vinnie lay on his bed with his arms behind his head; well, his organic arm was behind his head and his metal one was under the pillow to avoid causing discomfort. Vinnie couldn't help but feel a little worried because of what had happened in the day. Thanks to Kasimar Gary had left the competition with two broken legs. Now Vinnie was alone in his cabin; the top bunk and single bed were now both empty and devoid of an occupant.

"I'm all alone; alone in the dark." Said Vinnie to no one in particular as he lay in his bed. "It's just me, Uzuri and Tabitha left. I always knew Kasimar was a monster ever since I met him but I didn't think he would do _that_. I hope Gary is ok at the playa."

Vinnie had hoped it wouldn't happen but it had' he was on the losing team and was also on the same Island as a complete monster. As Vinnie chuckled at the thought of Gary punching Chris before he left the Island before quite a haunting and terrible thought struck him.

"Wait; if Kasimar did that to Gary … what's to say he won't do it to me? Or even worse … he might hurt Uzuri!" Whispered Vinnie in worry at the prospect of such a terrible occurrence before trying to calm himself down. "But there's no guarantee he will; Tabitha could protect Uzuri, and maybe Kasimar could get kicked off for hurting another contestant, there's gotta be a rule against it … right?"

Vinnie settled down uneasily and as he closed his eyes he thought one more sentence to himself which calmed him a little.

"_Karma is brutally efficient; Kasimar is going to get it eventually_."

* * *

**Confessional: Good night! ZZZZZZZ *snore* ZZZZZZZ.**

**Vinnie: Part of me is worried that Kasimar might hurt Uzuri … the other part of me thinks I shouldn't worry as much because of Uzuri's immunity to pain. But I think the majority of me supports the former of those views.**

* * *

The following morning the fourteen campers were sitting on chairs in the mess hall eating breakfast. Team Jungle immediately noticed the difference between Chef's cooking and Gary's cooking.

"This isn't really _that_ bad." Said Uzuri as she swallowed a piece of fried egg. "But it just isn't what I'm used to; Gary is definitely a better cook."

"Now that he's gone this is the sort of cooking we are gonna have to get used to." Said Vinnie as he dipped some slightly burned toast into some yolk and boot a bite. "Not bad; though I can kinda taste the burn."

"_Maybe I shouldn't have gotten rid of Gary_." Thought Tabitha as she finished her breakfast. "_Nah; he had outlived his usefulness; and a million dollars is worth tasting Chef's cooking_."

"Thinking about the food Gary used to cook eh Tabitha?" Asked Vinnie.

"A little; I just think it was so wrong how he lost." Lied Tabitha convincingly as usual.

"Well; if its any consolation Kasimar looks a little worse for wear at the moment." Smirked Vinnie. Sure enough the bully has a few tiny twigs in his hair and looked a little dirty.

"I heard Oscar say that he locked Kasimar out last night." Said Uzuri as she giggled at the bully's deserved misfortune. "Serves that blood slurping flesh crap head right! Teehee!"

* * *

**Confessional: Teehee!**

**Vinnie: Uzuri's insults may be a little childish but they make me smile all the same. I like that girl.**

* * *

"Good mooooorning campers!" Greeted Chris as he entered the mess hall with an intern carrying a large box behind him. "That if what I would say if you mattered at all; quite unlike myself! Haha!"

"Stop sucking up to yourself and announce the challenge." Said Xaria with a grumble.

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris. "You must have been born dumb to not know that the challenge isn't for a little while yet. For now I have a surprise for you all."

"You've finally come out of the closet?" Asked Oscar snarkly.

A number of campers laughed while Chris's eyes narrowed and he snarled. Jimmy cocked his head to the side.

"What does that mean?" Asked Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: I am pretty much a closet myself!**

**Jimmy: What closet did they mean? Is that more teen slang? I should probably buy a slang dictionary sometime soon; maybe then I could get what everyone is laughing about.**

**Chris: **(Fuming and snarling). **I'm not a #bleep# homosexual! I like girls! Especially hot girls!**

* * *

"No! Shut up!" Growled Chris. "Now; you may be wondering what is in this box right?"

"Oh _no_ we weren't; we didn't even _notice_ the _large_ box." Said Quana sarcastically.

"Stop making fun of me!" Said Chris as he began to cry in frustration and anger. "This box contains packages from your friends and family from your homes. If you keep upsetting the wonderful me then I won't let you have them and I'll just _burn_ them!"

THAT remark shut everyone up pretty quickly and Chris laughed sadistically.

"Well; I'm under contract to not burn your presents but if I could I would; so lets start handing out the presents. Hopefully one of them will be a boxing glove in a box; that would be very funny to watch."

"It'd be funny to se it done on Kasimar." Grumbled Quana.

Jimmy heard this and thought to himself.

"_Not a bad Idea; I'll keep that in mind_."

* * *

**Confessional: Why don't I get a present? I'm just as much a character as everyone else!**

**Spider: Presents from home? I ***cough* **wonder what I'll get; I've ***cough* **already got enough medication ***sneeze* **for the whole time I'm here.**

**Eleanor: This sounds nice; mum and dad are very good at choosing good presents. Maybe Frost and Dandelion will get something as well.**

**Mable: A present from my friends and family. That's so sweet. Maybe I'll get a selection of fruit or some hair dye.**

**Kasimar: Meh; it doesn't matter what present I get; my parents never were that good at choosing any decent presents, they never even got me a handgun! Still; maybe my gang have pitched in and got me something cool.**

* * *

Lavender opened the box in front of her and took out a pair of cheer leading pom poms, a photograph and a letter. She smiled and began to read the letter.

_Hey Lavender!_

_Its not the same at cheerleading practice without you but we're getting by. The other day we tried making a tower but we all fell over into a heap; maybe if you were there your balance could have prevented it._

_Great job on the show so far; we're positive that you will make the merge and maybe go all the way. Watch out for that dickhead Kasimar thought; something about him just isn't right. But we're sure you will be fine with your team mates around, and we all know how tough of a girl you are._

_By the way' there is a guy in the competition who really __**likes**__ you. Heehee! Just giving you a heads up._

_Good luck and we'll be cheering you on._

A number of signatures were written below; one for everyone on the cheer leading squad. Lavender nodded to herself happily as she looked at the picture. It was a picture of her cheerleading friends forming a pyramid and waving to the camera.

"Thanks guys." Whispered Lavender with a smile.

As she admired the pom poms something struck her.

"Wait … someone likes me?" Asked Lavender quietly in big surprise.

* * *

**Confessional: we know who does! Yaaaaar!**

**Lavender: Thank you everyone back home; that was really nice of you. But who is it that likes me? **(Lavender thinks to herself and blushes). **Is it Barney? I admit he's kinda cute and handsome … but I don't **_**like**_** him like that! **

**Raven: **(Smirking). **I heard Lavenders last confessional while I was waited to get in here. She can only be in denial for so long. **(Raven giggles).

* * *

Oscar opened his slightly weighted package and took out a shiny brand new dumbbell. It was colored green and blue and seemed to be limited edition of some sort. Oscar picked up the note and smiled as he read through it.

_Oscar_

_Son; you are doing great so far. Not only are your muscles coming in handy but your bravery and niceness are all there as well. That bully has to learn his lesson somehow and I think you might be able to straighten him out._

_You're doing fine. Maybe by the end of the competition you could walk away with more than just the money; I've seen the way you look at that Xaria girl. _

_I hope you enjoy working out with the dumbbell I've enclosed your gym mates made it themselves in metal shop._

_Love dad._

Oscar put the letter in his pocket and lifted up the dumbbell. It weighed roughly five kilograms and was very well crafted. As Oscar began to lift it up and down he nodded in contentment.

"I'll have to thank the guys in the gym somehow.?" Said Oscar with a smile.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no arms so a dumbbell would be useless to me.**

**Oscar: Thank you everyone; I'll think of you all when I work out with this dumbbell. And dad; is it really that obvious I like Xaria? Does she already know?**

* * *

Tabitha opened her small sized package and took out a very large wad of ten dollar bills. She smiled at the sight of one of her favorite things as she read the letter that came with it.

_Tabitha_

_You are playing a very successful and strategic game so far; you are a token to the Barrington family line. We enclose three thousand dollars for you to use for bribes and to buy yourself something nice._

_From your Mother and Farther_

Tabitha looked happy as she pocketed the letter and looked at the money in front of her. Vinnie was sitting beside her and while he didn't see what was on the letter he had seen the money.

"**_Whoa_**. Tabitha; that's got to be more than two thousand dollars! If you have that much money than why are you even on this show?"

"Well; I don't have many friends back home." Lied Tabitha with a fake sad sigh. "Most people are very sour and jealous that I'm well off. Others try to leach off my money. Some who are rich like me just talk of nothing but money. I have few who like me for who I am. I mainly joined this show to make friends."

"That sounds like a reasonable idea; and you've succeeded. You're good friends with Uzuri right?" Smiled Vinnie.

"True; so, what present did you get?" Asked Tabitha.

Vinnie opened the box he had received and took out what appeared to be a fur pelt. It looked like it was made from an animal that lived in a cold environment. Vinnie looked excited as he read the letter that came with it.

_This pelt has been passed down the family since it was made by your great, great grandfather Fyodor. It is time it was given to you. _

_You are doing great in the competition and we are proud of you. Maybe you could go all the way and win the prize. Even if you don't you've done great. And just so you know; we completely approve of you going out with that Uzuri girl if you choose to; she seems like such a sweetie._

_From your loving family_

Vinnie was smiling wide by the end of the letter; Tabitha had read it over his shoulder and was outwardly smiling while inwardly disgusted at the possibility Vinnie liked Uzuri.

"So; you _like_ Uzuri hmmm?" Asked Tabitha.

"Shhhhhhh!" Said Vinnie quickly.

"Oh … sorry." Whispered Tabitha. "So; you like her do you?"

"…Yes; denying it would be pointless. She may be very unusual and kind of eccentric … but she has so many good qualities. She's kind, she accepts everyone for who they are, she's easy to get along with … and between you and me … I think she's beautiful." Said Vinnie with a slight swoon.

Vinnie looked around to spot Uzuri to make sure she hadn't heard that. She hadn't, she was at the back of the line of people waiting for their presents.

"Well; good luck." Smiled Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.**

**Tabitha: **(She looks sickened). **Vinnie may be a little bit of a freak; but I didn't think he liked Uzuri that much. Blech! And here I was thinking he had standards. Well; everyone is wrong at some point in their life. I may as well let it be; I need them both on my side, such as it is.**

**Vinnie: I wonder what Uzuri's present will be; maybe she'll get a horror movie or another doll. Well; thank you everyone back home for that present and letter; it means a lot to me.**

* * *

Jimmy opened his package excitedly and grinned huge when he saw what was inside. It was a large bag of jelly beans, some chocolate bars and a party sized packet of toffee popcorn.

"They're such great friends." Said Jimmy happily. He picked up the letter and began to read it.

_What's up Jimmy?_

_We've watched every episode so far and we all wish that we had drawn the longest straw! You must be having a great time on Wawanakwa with all your new friends; I bet this summer is the best one yet eh?_

_I personally think you did great in the fear challenge. You sure showed that Freddie Krueger doesn't scare you anymore. I would have liked to have been in the boat race myself; but there are some things money can't buy._

_Ted and Charles have a bet going on. Charles is betting you'll get to at least the final eight while Ted has bet fifty bucks that you will be the one to take down Kasimar. Charles doesn't think so but you never know do you?_

_Speaking of Kasimar; every time he comes on screen Ricky boos and sometimes throws some popcorn at the TV. It's a good thing it didn't stain it; that widescreen TV cost a lot of money!_

_We all wish you good luck and hope you win; and win or lose you're still my best friend. Now get out there and show that big power __**can**__ come in small packages._

_Pablo Edward Sharlton Marcadia the 1__st_

Jimmy looked happy as he put the letter in his pocket and picked up the bag of jelly beans; underneath it he saw a picture. Upon looking at it he saw it was one of his four best friends waving from in front of Pablo's family's mansion.

"You guys are the best." Said Jimmy in a touched voice as he began to make a start on the jelly beans.

* * *

**Confessional: Friends are there for you; when the rain starts to fall!**

**Jimmy: **(He is holding the bag of jelly beans). **Thanks guys; that was a very nice letter and this candy is great! Hopefully it'll last a while … but knowing how much I like sweet stuff I guess not! Heheehee!**

* * *

Barney opened his package and grinned at what he saw inside. It was a miniature model of a pirate ship, the type that used to sail the seven seas. As he admired it for a moment he picked up the letter that was also in the package and began to read it.

_Dear Barney_

_Hello son. Me and your dad are impressed at how well you've done so far and how you stood up to that crazy guy obsessed with being evil. The way you are going I se no reason why you can't win! _

_I know how much you like pirates so I hope you enjoy this model. It may not be on the same scale as the real thing but I hope you like it all the same. _

_And while you are helping that nice boy Spider get a girlfriend you should think about your own love life as well. Its pretty easy to tell you like that girl Lavender after seeing your confessionals._

_Good luck and have a great summer!_

_Mum_

"Yaaaar; that is touching." Smiled Barney. He glanced at Lavender for a moment and blushed faintly.

* * *

**Confessional: Don't touch! This is a museum!**

**Barney: I do quite like Lavender … but while I may know how to help other people get girls I'm not as brave when its me by myself. I'll tell her eventually … when the time is right.**

* * *

Spider opened his package and smiled when he saw a camera inside it with a number of rolls of film as well as what seemed to be a scrapbook. He picked up the letter after coughing and began to read it.

_Dear Spider_

_We are so proud of you. You have proved that it doesn't matter about your physical health at all; you can still go far if you give it your all which you have been doing. Its wonderful that you've made such good friends so far during your stay on the island. _

_We were worried at first when we saw how that Nakia girl treated you but once she got deservedly voted off we breathed a sigh of relief. You don't have to be scared of her; she is too shallow and hair obsessed to cause you any harm. The same goes for Kasimar; it may be hard to believe but despite his tough attitude and strength he is a coward._

_Barney looks like a very good friend to you; he's certainly helping you win Quana's heart! Me and your dad fully approve of you liking her; Quana seems like a sweet, caring and delightful young lady. And while it was a little on the reckless side we were also proud when you … 'stood up' to Kasimar when he smacked Quana._

_Good luck Spider; we hope you have a wonderful time on that Island. We are giving you a camera so you can take some pictures of your friends and surroundings so in years to come we can all look back on your island adventure._

_Love from your mum and dad._

Spider was touched as he stopped reading and picked up the camera.

"May as well *cough* start the scrapbook." Said Spider as he smiled for the camera and took a picture of himself.

* * *

**Confessional: Awww! Wasn't that nice?**

**Spider: Mum and dad have always ***cough* **been there for me when ***cough* **things get hard or when ***sneeze* **I'm upset. I owe them a ***splutter* **lot.**

* * *

Mable was delighted when she opened the box she had been sent. Inside was a smoothie machine and a number of different fruits; Mable could almost taste the smoothies that she would make as she read the letter that came with the box.

_Dear Mable_

_We hope you are having a good time on Wawanakwa Island; from watching the episodes we can see that not only have you made quite a number of friends but you had a little something going on with that Andy boy. It was such a shame when he got voted off thanks to Wallace's trap._

_We hope you have the best summer ever on that Island; your sisters have even started a Mable fan club at their school. All they are talking about lately is how their big sister is going to be rich and that you'll be famous! _

_To show how proud we are of you here is a smoothie maker; we know how much you like fruit smoothies and the exotic fruits of Wawanakwa should make some good ones. Just make sure they aren't poisonous first!_

_From your proud and loving family_

Mable smiled as she looked over the wireless smoothie machine.

"They've made a fan club of me?" Said Mable in amusement.

* * *

**Confessional: I want a fan club!**

**Mable: I never thought I'd have a fan club. That is really nice; thanks you guys.**

* * *

Raven looked over her copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in excitement. It looked like a very good book; hopefully the series would have a happy ending. Her letter was about how proud her parents were and that they were delighted she had opened up and that they would like to meet Gary; it was nice.

"Awesome! Yahaha!" Laughed a nasty voice from across the table.

"What are _you_ so happy about?" Asked Raven dryly.

"Nothing much … just that my gang sent me a few teeth of some freshmen at school; this'll be a great keepsake!" Smirked Kasimar as he gazed at the slightly blood stained teeth in the box.

"That's horrible!" Gasped Raven in disgust.

"So? What are you gonna do about it?" Sneered Kasimar nastily as he began to closely examine the teeth.

* * *

**Confessional: POW! Out comes a tooth!**

**Kasimar: I almost never give thanks but I think I can thank Ian and the rest of my gang. You sure have been busy on the freshmen; good job! Yahahahaha!**

**Raven: **(Her mouth is agape in shock before she snarls). **How can someone possibly find that sort of thing **_**funny**_**?**

* * *

Eleanor was looking happily at a ferret plushie she had received along with a rubber ball with a bell inside that was for frost and Dandelion. In her house Frost and Dandelion were considered an official part of the family.

"This is so nice; I wonder what this letter says." Said Eleanor with a smile as she began to read.

_Dear Eleanor_

_We hope you are having a wonderful time on Wawanakwa. You must be excited that Dandelion is almost ready to give birth right? Hopefully she and Frost will enjoy their present as much as you enjoy yours._

_The way you helped Quana with her feelings for Spider was very kind and noble of you. We are so proud to have you as our daughter._

_Keep going as long as you can and we hope you, Frost and Dandelion have a summer to remember!_

_From mum and daddy._

Eleanor smiled in emotion at the lovely letter and hugged the ferret plushie happily. Just down the table Quana was reading her letter while admiring the CD player and CD's she had been sent.

_Dearest Quana_

_Me and your mother are hoping you are enjoying yourself on Total Drama Letterz. The way that nasty bully leers at you both worried and angered us; but with such good friends on your side I think all is going to be well._

_There is a boy in among the contestants that is really in love with you; we won't say who but he is a delightful and kind hearted young man. Whatever happens we wish the best for you. And maybe your feelings you are gaining for Spider could amount to something._

_Enjoy your summer and last as long as you can dear! We are pound of you and love you as well as miss you._

_Your loving Mum and Dad_

Quana smiled as a single tear of happiness exited her eye.

"Thank you." She said quietly.

* * *

**Confessional: Isn't that nice? Isn't it? Huh? Huh?**

**Quana: Thank you mum and dad. That was very nice; and these CD's look like they will be great to listen to as well. But who is the guy who is in love with me?**

**Eleanor: **(Holding the ball).** I think I know two ferrets that are going to enjoy this toy. **(She smiles childishly).

* * *

Xaria hadn't gotten a package or box but had instead got a letter. As she opened it she suddenly noticed that it had the return address of a … prison.

"_Jaron_." Though Xaria uneasily as she began to hesitantly read.

_Stillbirth_

_So you've got on TV have you? You're out there becoming famous while I'm stuck in here in the slammer for at least five more years. Well let me tell you something ... once I'm out you're for it. You ruined my life that day you squealed._

_First you got me expelled, and then you got me arrested! Well ask yourself this … are you any better than me? You are grouchy, you complain about everything and you push anyone who shows you niceness away!_

_Do you think anyone here really cares about you? After the show you'll never see them again … and do you think that muscular guy would like you back? You are unlikable. Think about it._

_Jaron._

Xaria's heart was beating painfully fast as she gazed down at the letter in front of her. She slowly pocketed it and looked ahead with wide eyes as she thought back to the day it all began.

* * *

_It was Xaria's third year in high school; she casually walked along the bike shed area of the school with her hands in her pockets. She was doing well at her subjects and had several friends. Things were going pretty good. But something troubled her a little._

_Jaron had joined a gang earlier in the year; a gang of the delinquent students that caused a lot of trouble. They had been suspended a lot of times and most were on their last chance. Jaron had seemed to quickly click with them and had become accepted into their circle. She had caused some trouble recently but Xaria was sure that she would do the right thing soon._

"_Help!" Screamed a voice from nearby._

_Xaria quickly ran to where the sound of the voice had come from and hid behind the bike shed as she watched the scene in front of her._

_Jaron was beating the crap out of a student on the ground … a student that has trouble walking and was on crutches. The other members of the gang were cheering and egging Jaron on. Xaria silently gasped at what she was seeing._

"_Had enough yet?" Sneered Jaron as she gave a final punch to the crippled student._

"_Go Jaron!" Cheered one of the gang members._

"_I never knew causing pain could be so enjoyable." Smirked Jaron as she got back up from the unconscious victim._

"_You learn something everyday." Smirked another gang member._

"_Shall we continued?" Asked Jaron sadistically._

"_Yes' let's." Grinned a third gang member._

_As the beating resumed Xaria had dashed off and soon enough was in the principles office fearfully explaining what she had just seen. Jaron and all the gang members were expelled later that day. That's where her problems all began._

* * *

"Xaria?" Said Oscar which bought Xaria back to reality. "Are you ok? You look unsettled."

Tears began to well up in Xaria's eyes which surprised Oscar and the other people at the table sans Kasimar.

"Crybaby!" Jeered Kasimar which earned a punch from Mable.

"Are you quite alright Xaria?" Asked Oscar in great concern.

"Leave me alone!" Cried Xaria as she ran out of the mess hall in tears.

As Xaria left the other members of team grenade exchanged glances.

"What just happened?" Asked Raven.

"Maybe Xaria's present wasn't so nice." Guessed Lavender.

Oscar looked in the direction Xaria had ran in big worry.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't think a joke would be appropriate.**

**Xaria: **(Her eyes are watery). **Why did I squeal? What have I done?** (She puts her face into her hands).

* * *

Uzuri noticed that everybody else had received a present and wondered where hers was. Chris was sipping a latté he had been given by an intern and didn't seem to be handing out presents anymore.

"Hey Chris; where's my present?" Asked Uzuri.

"Hmmmm, let me think." Said Chris sarcastically. "The box is empty so naturally that means there is nothing else in it. Looks like you didn't get anything."

"Nobody sent me anything?" Said Uzuri sounding a little hurt.

"Yep; I guess none of the people back home give a rat's ass about you huh?" Smirked Chris nastily. "Looks like your parents couldn't be bothered to send you even a postcard! Haha!"

"Mummy and daddy didn't send me anything either." Asked Uzuri faintly.

"Yep! Looks like your own parents don't love you!" Sneered Chris cruelly. "How about that? The people who bought you into this world, a big mistake by the way, and the people you are closest to didn't send you anything! And if they don't love you it seems to me that nobody else in the whole world would even remotely care about you!" Haha!"

Tears were beginning to appear in Uzuri's eyes by now. Vinnie saw what was happening and rose from his seat and marched towards Chris but Chris delivered the final emotional blow before he got there.

"Yep; looks like nobody would even care if you died! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

That did it for Uzuri. She burst into tears and ran out of the mess hall crying. Vinnie marched right up to Chris and stood there for a moment.

BAM!

Vinnie punched Chris in the gut with all his might with his metal fist. Chris doubled over and coughed.

"What the #bleep# was that all about!" Snarled Vinnie. "Why did you do that? Of course people care about Uzuri! We like her, some of us even more than that!"

"It was, oooo, good for ratings, and it was, ooooo, funny." Said Chris half condescendingly and half in great pain. "And two girls crying in just two minutes; ooooo, new record! Haha! Ooooo!"

"You monster!" Roared Vinnie. "How could you?"

"Whatever; oooo, cut to commercials while I recover!" Said Chris to the cameraman who also looked noticeably repulsed by Chris.

"I hope Uzuri's ok." Said Vinnie as he ran out of the mess hall.

"I hope Xaria is ok." Mumbled Oscar from his seat; the happy feeling from before had completely left him.

* * *

**Confessional: I am disgusted! How could he do that?**

**Uzuri: **(Her eyes are red from crying). **Is that true? Does nobody like me? Why can't people just be my friends? **(Uzuri sniffles sadly). **Going through life with no friends has been hard … but if my own parents don't even like me … Waaaaah! **(Uzuri starts crying again).

* * *

Whoa! Chris has gone to an all new low hasn't he? That last part was difficult to write as Uzuri is one of my favorites … but it had to be done for the story to progress. But keep in mind I as an author LOVE happy endings, this story will have one in the end.

Stay tuned for the second part of day twelve for the challenge, some heart warming moments and a very shocking elimination.


	26. Day 12, Part 2, Call of the Wild

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action, or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his great story Total Drama Alphabet. And while I'm at it I also do not own the song 'you've got a friend in me', that belongs to Pixar and Randy Newman. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains a wild horse ride, a crocodile, an angry bear, a cowardly bully, some love, a bit of depression and a lot of controversy. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender AndyxMable JimmyxEleanor **GaryxRaven **VinniexUzuri and OscarxXaria

**Note: **Sorry for the wait; I would have had this chapter out sooner but I've been feeling a bit unwell lately. But three days off school gave me some time to catch up on my writing and therefore I hereby present chapter twenty six of Total Drama Letterz. This one continues the emotional events of chapter twenty five and ends with a happy resolution. But what happens? Read on to find out! And leave a review if you really enjoy it.

I'ma firin mah Lazor!

* * *

"And we're back." Said Chris with a smile. He had gotten to his feet and recovered from Vinnie's strong punch. The campers besides Xaria and Uzuri stood around looking Chris, all but Kasimar looked angry at Chris for what he had said to Uzuri. "So; everyone ready to here what the challenge is for today?"

"Not until you apologize to Uzuri." Said Vinnie angrily.

"Yeah; what you did *cough* was uncalled for and *cough* completely jerkass." Said spider with a disapproving frown.

"Hmmm … Nope! I'm actually not sorry and I'd happily do it again." Sneered Chris. "She's a freak anyway so it's all good."

Chris promptly received a number of empty boxes to the face for that comment.

* * *

**Confessional: Where you are safe from boxes.**

**Chris: Ow! That really hurt! **(Chris starts crying).

* * *

"Stop that!" Growled Chris. "Anyway; today's challenge is one that some of you might enjoy."

"Which of us? The sane or psychotic?" Asked Lavender while glancing at Kasimar. Kasimar just crossed his arms and frowned.

"Probably both." Said Chris vaguely. "It's going to test your harmony with nature, skill with beasties and outdoor survival!"

"So we're going camping?" Asked Jimmy excitedly. "I love camping!"

"No, we are not doing camping Mr. Pint Size." Sneered Chris with his signature laugh.

"Then what are we doing?" Asked Tabitha impatiently.

"Haven't I already told you?" Asked Chris with a dry yawn.

"No; you haven't." Said Eleanor with an audible sigh. "Please continue oh so great host."

"Thank you!" Smiled Chris happily. "Nice to see somebody knows how great I am! Haha!"

"I was being sarcastic you nitwit." Said Eleanor as she moved one of her long blond and green bangs out of her face.

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris angrily. "Look; if you want to know the challenge just follow me outside; oh, and somebody should go and get bumble bee and freako so they can hear the rules."

Oscar and Vinnie stepped forwards to go and get their upset crushes; as they went past Oscar punched Chris without looking at him.

"Ow! You bully" Wailed Chris as the short guy and muscular body builder exited the mess hall. "Ok; let's go outside and I'll explain the challenge that none of you could figure out without my guidance. Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: I sense a guiding hand.**

**Oscar: If there is one thing I really don't like, its bullies … and Chris is a complete bully. Uzuri didn't deserve that, I may not know her too well but I still know she didn't deserve that at all.**

**Eleanor: That was so mean! How could Chris do that? What did Uzuri ever do to him? Bullying isn't funny; it's horrible! **(Eleanor frowns).

* * *

Uzuri was sitting on her bed crying into her hands. She had been really hurt by Chris's words; he had basically said she was a waste of space and nobody liked her.

"Why must I always be the outcast?" Sobbed Uzuri softly. "Why can't I just be accepted for who I am? It's always freak, she's crazy or worthless sadist. I can only ignore it for so long."

Uzuri wiped her eyes and sniffled a little. This was turning into the worst day of her life.

"Uzuri … are you ok?" Asked Vinnie from the doorway with a look of great concern on his face.

"No I'm not! Stuck on an island in the middle of nowhere with that awful man and thirteen people who despise me!" Said Uzuri with tears in her eyes.

"What? Look, Uzuri, we don't hate you." Said Vinnie comfortingly.

"Well why would they like me if my own family didn't send me anything?" Asked Uzuri sadly through her tear filled eyes.

"Because you're a nice person which is a lot more than I can say for the likes of Chris and Kasimar." Smiled Vinnie.

"You don't have to lie to try and make me cheer up." Said Uzuri with a small frown. "Did you come here for a reason?"

"Yes I did; the challenge is about to start and you need to hear the rules but the important thing is that you a-." Said Vinnie before Uzuri cut him off.

"Are a freak? I know; nearly everyone I've met has called me that at some point. Lets just get this over with; I'm going to get voted off anyway." Said Uzuri as her gloomy sadness returned to its full as she got off the bed and walked past Vinnie hanging her head.

Vinnie looked quite concerned and wrung his hands nervously as he followed after her back to the others.

"_Years of sadness must be coming out in one go_." Thought Vinnie in worry. "_I hope we don't lose; she might vote for herself … what should I do?_

* * *

**Confessional: When I get sad I comfort eat.**

**Uzuri: I wonder what the challenge will be; maybe Chris will make a "humiliate Uzuri challenge". I bet everyone would enjoy that. **(Uzuri sighs sadly).

**Vinnie: What should I do? I'm no expert on girls by any standards … but I can tell Uzuri needs cheering up … though how to do that is going to take some thought.**

* * *

Oscar could hear a sobbing sound coming from the girl's side of the Team Grenade cabin; he knew it was Xaria and the sound of someone tough like her crying was very concerning and surprising to him. He slowly moved to the open door and hesitantly knocked which got Xaria's attention.

"What is it Oscar? I'm … going through a tough time here." Said Xaria as she wiped tears of her face.

"I came to see if you are alright; it doesn't take Noah to see that you are sad and when my friends are sad I talk to them." Said Oscar as he stood at the doorway.

"I appreciate the concern … but it's not important." Sighed Xaria as she hung her head. "Shouldn't you be with the team?"

"Well, yeah, but I think your well being is a fair margin more important than being near Kasimar. What's the matter? Was your present … um … nasty?" Asked Oscar gently.

"…Yes." Said Xaria as she got off her bed. "Anything else you came to tell me?"

"Well I also came to say that Chris is going to explain the rules of the challenge but the main reason I'm here was to see if you are alright." Explained Oscar. "Want to take a walk and talk?"

"No thanks; I'd better listen to the usual crap that comes out of Chris's mouth." Said Xaria as she walked sadly out the door as Oscar began to follow. "What torture could he have planned today?"

"Hopefully nothing too bad; but if we work as a team I'm sure we can do it … and maybe we could get Kasimar booted off while we're at it."

"Sounds nice; a lot nicer than…" Xaria trailed off and silently mumbled something.

Oscar couldn't quite hear all of what Xaria had mumbled but he was sure he had heard the word 'Jaron'.

"_Who could Jaron be_? _A bully from her school_?" Though Oscar as he and Xaria walked along.

* * *

**Confessional: Or a bully from within her home.**

**Oscar: This ... is not good. The show started out nice enough; but after what happened from Gary and now Uzuri and Xaria in tears ... I'm wondering just what is going on here.**

**Xaria: **(She just stares at the camera and sighs sadly).

* * *

Soon enough Vinnie arrived back to the others with a depressed Uzuri and Oscar arrived with Xaria. Most campers looked at the two girls in concern and sympathy; that's right, I said MOST.

Kasimar was thinking of what nasty remark to say that could make Xaria cry again; before he could decide Oscar's eyes met his in a glare that clearly said, "_Upset her and I'll KILL you_," following this Kasimar stayed silent.

"Ok; we all here? All tough or crying? Good." Smiled Chris as he took out a rifle and blasted a shot in the air which caused a bang. A second later a dead eagle fell down to Chris's feet.

"Hmm, bummer." Said Chris in a bored voice.

"How could you!" Roared Eleanor angrily. "Why the rifle? Don't you remember last season when you had a gun? You just murdered an innocent animal!"

"And I'm sure he will taste delicious, don't you worry." Smirked Chris with a sneer.

Eleanor tried to run at Chris and attack him but Jimmy used all his might to hold her back.

"Don't bother Eleanor; he's just a pathetic, sad, strange little man who isn't worth it." Said Jimmy to calm his friend down.

Eleanor took a few deep breaths and her anger chilled.

"You're right; I just get angry when animals get hurt." Said Eleanor as he looked sympathetically at the dead eagle.

"Can we turn the attention back to me?" Whined Chris. "I'm the one who is going to give you the rules; without me you'd all be nothing!"

"So what are we doing?" Asked Raven.

"Today I'm bringing back a portion of one of my favorite challenges from last season; it had animals, a speedy duck, a raccoon monster and a tranquilizer dart in the butt."

"Oh no; do you mean the animal wrangling challenge?" Asked Kasimar with a groan. "I … hate … animals! Gaaaah!"

"Then this challenge might be enjoyable." Smirked Oscar while hoping to make Xaria smile; when he glanced at her she still looked sad.

"Kasimar is right; but it has a twist today. Last time it was done after the merge; this time it is going to be done with your teams. Each team has a specific animal they must capture and bring to camp. As the most excellent me is feeling quite generous today, the teams with less members have an easier animal to catch while the teams with more numbers have a harder animal to catch. Because of more members meaning more strength it evens out in the end." Explained Chris.

"I hope we don't have to capture sasquatchinaquwa." Prayed Mable out loud.

"Nope; his contract expired and now he is on holiday in Japan … he was then arrested for eating too much at an all you can eat sushi bar. Anyway; I can reveal that Team Jungle, AKA Team Failure, are going to catch a horse since they have the fewest members. But he warned; it's a feisty one! Haha!"

"Do any of you two know how to ride a horse?" Asked Tabitha to her team mates.

"I've done it before when I was younger; I'm a little rusty but I'm sure it'll come back to me after a while." Said Vinnie with a shrug of confirmation.

"What does it matter; I can't do anything useful or worthwhile." Said Uzuri miserably.

"Uzuri; that's not true." Began Vinnie but Chris cleared his throat to interrupt him.

"Moving along; Team Puzzle are going to be going after a crocodile; don't worry though, you get a muzzle to take with you. Haha!"

"How do we get the muzzle on the crocodile?" Asked Quana.

"Not my problem." Chuckled Chris. "But please try not to get eaten; that would mess up the challenge order I have planned. Haha!"

"How do you *cough* sleep at night after *cough* making us suffer so much?" Asked Spider looking appalled.

"It's quite easy really; I simply don't care! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"Dickhead." Mumbled Barney in disgust.

* * *

**Confessional: Wrong side of the bed.**

**Barney: Did Chris wake up and decide to be evil today yaaaar? He thinks he is cool but he is not; everyone hates him. If I was in charge I'd make him walk the plank into shark infested water!**

**Chris: Shut up!**

* * *

"And that leaves Team Grenade with the most dangerous animal. I hope you like mammals because you are going to go after … a bear! Haha!"

Team Grenade were stunned; how were they supposed to catch a bear?

"You can't be series." Said Lavender in a deadpan voice.

"He wouldn't." Said Raven in shock.

"He would." Grumbled Xaria sadly.

"Bumble bee is right; I would. Haha! So; you guys are going after a bear. You can use any method to catch it besides killing it but you don't get any items to help you."

"Why not?" Demanded Lavender.

"Because you already have the most members; giving you something like a tranquilizer would be an unfair advantage. Duh!" Laughed Chris.

"Since when do you care about fairness?" Asked Mable dryly.

"Only when it benefits me." Shrugged Chris. "So; when you have wrangled your animal you have to bring them back to camp and put them in the cages so the interns can take them off the island later."

"What cages?" Asked Jimmy since not a single cage was in the vicinity.

"It isn't built yet ok; but that is not important; just get going and try not to die. Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

* * *

**Confessional: I have a bad feeling … oh wait, its just gas.**

**Lavender: How in the flippin heck are we supposed to catch a bear? We have no items to use on it so it's going to be pretty hard. Someone might get really hurt!**

**Vinnie: Its official; Chris has gone off the deep end. My team may have got off fairly easy but I'm kinda concerned about the others. I don't think crocodiles and bears are very friendly.**

**Tabitha: I have a good feeling about this; if Vinnie can ride a horse we may be able to ride it back to camp. This time we might win; after an overall total of five losses I think first place sounds pretty good. **

**Spider: Oh boy; this does **_**not**_*cough* **sound good. I've watched the crocodile ***cough* **hunter before, crocodiles are quite aggressive; ***sneeze* **I hope Quana and the others don't ***cough* **get hurt. **

**Uzuri: **(She is hanging her head with a few tears in her eyes). **I bet the others are going to push me in front of the horse so I get hurt and they can laugh. Well; doesn't surprise me really. **(Uzuri sniffles).

**Chris: Isn't this great? Looks like the fruits of my efforts are being harvested! Haha! Uzuri's one of the worst contestants anyway, no harm no foul right? I've just got to, ahem, 'tilt' the game in Kasimar's favor so ratings keep coming in and I get a bigger paycheck! Haha!**

* * *

A while later the campers had gone off into the woods to search for their respective animal; as Chris had told them there was only one of each animal on the Island it would be easy to know when they had the right one.

Team Jungle had gone off into the grassiest and open parts of the woods which they thought was where the horse was more likely to be; after all, do horses like being in the creepy forest with a bear and a crocodile?

"Well guys; I think that despite us having the least members of any team we might have a shot at this; horses are easier to approach with less people, they feel more at ease. Of course; I've never ridden one but there is a first time for everything." Said Tabitha to motivate her team.

* * *

**Confessional: Except…**

**Tabitha: Except losing; specifically me losing this show.**

* * *

"Maybe we should look for an apple tree." Suggested Vinnie. "I think horses like apples so maybe we'll find it there."

"Good thinking Vinnie; any idea where an apple tree is?" Asked Tabitha.

"That I'm afraid I do not know." Said Vinnie apologetically.

"What about you Uzuri; what do you think we should do?" Asked Tabitha while hoping Uzuri had pulled herself together by now.

"I don't know; why ask me? I can't do anything." Said Uzuri as sadly as ever.

"You can do stuff." Said Vinnie as he moved to walk beside Uzuri. "Who lasted longest in the torture challenge? You did! Who is the nicest and most kind hearted person I have ever known? You are!"

"Don't tell lies Vinnie; I'm not worth it. I know you don't like me; and why try? I'm just going to get voted off tonight." Sniffled Uzuri very sadly as a single tear exited her eye and she quickly walked ahead leaving Vinnie and Tabitha and the two glanced at each other as they walked.

"Chris has really upset Uzuri." Said Vinnie. "This isn't the Uzuri I know."

"Me neither." Agreed Tabitha. "Chris was quite… tactless."

"I think he was more than just tactless." Said Vinnie in disdain. "He flat out told Uzuri that not only does nobody like her but also her parents don't love her … and that's a load a crap! I'm sure a number of people like her, you just need to get used to her."

"Well; what can we do?" Asked Tabitha with a completely false sigh.

* * *

**Confessional: I can't help; I don't have a brain.**

**Tabitha: Its not that I care about Uzuri; but if she keeps acting like a self loathing emo then we're going to lose and then it'll all go down the toilet. I've got to think of a way to make her cheer up.**

**Uzuri: From my name to my odd mannerisms; at school they all hated me. Why can't people just be nice to me? **(Uzuri stars to cry).

**Vinnie: Poor sweet Uzuri; I think she just needs a friend; she has Tabitha, but maybe she needs more friends. I'm making it my mission until further notice to help her cheer up and be like her usual lovable self, the usual self that I love.**

* * *

"Maybe we can be really nice to her and talk about horror movies to her." Suggested Vinnie.

"Do you know anything about horror movies?" Asked Tabitha. "I don't; I much prefer drama and romance hybrids."

"I'm more of a musical guy myself. I've not watched many horror movies. Well; I do know a tiny bit about Freddie Krueger."

"Well; I think you can help Uzuri more than I can, you like her and I think she likes you." Said Tabitha with a small smile.

"Well; I guess it's worth a try; but we've got to keep an eye out for that horse as well. If not then one of us will be gone by tomorrow." Said Vinnie as he sped up to catch up with Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional: How do you pull a cart? A horse *OF COURSE*! LOLOLOLOLOL!**

**Vinnie: Here goes nothing; I just hope Uzuri will listen to me.**

**Tabitha: If worst comes to worst Uzuri will vote for herself if we lose; Vinnie may or may not vote for me and I'll have to for the "U nique" freak. Either way I'm in no danger.**

* * *

Team Puzzle was looking around the rivers and wetlands of Wawanakwa island; they were all having to watch their step to make sure they wouldn't end up in the scummy muck.

"I never did like swamps." Said Eleanor as she stepped over a gap of muck. "They are much too muddy for me and the animals are usually either gross or dangerous."

"I thought you liked all animals." Said Jimmy as he looked at a few logs in the river to make sure they were actually logs and not the alligator they were looking for.

"Most of them; I don't like grubby things or animals that may as well be monsters, like those dogs that attack young children." Explained Eleanor.

"Me too; bugs are gross." Gagged Jimmy. "I don't mind butterfly's though."

"Same here; I love the most colorful ones." Smiled Eleanor.

"Anyone see the beastie crocodile?" Asked Barney as he hopped onto a log into the middle of the bog and put a hand above his eyes as he peered around.

"Be careful Barney; if *cough* you fall in you could get a *cough* disease and end up like *cough* me." Cautioned Spider.

"Don't worry me heartie; I am one with the water … the fish gutting messy water, but water all the same." Grinned Barney as he leapt back onto land. "I didn't see our croccy friend; shame really, a pair of croc skin boots would be a welcome addition to my stylish pirate attire."

"I'm not sure I'd call it stylish." Giggled Quana with small mirth. "But I can sort of see your dress sense. But if you're a pirate why don't you have a hook hand?"

"Sawing off my hand would be too painful and emotionally I can't stand my own screaming." Explained Barney casually.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd expect that from Uzuri.**

**Quana: I guess that kind of makes sense in a weird way; a very weird nonsensical way that is.**

**Jimmy: That's our Barney!**

* * *

"Have you got the muzzle cough* ready Barney?" Asked Spider.

"Yep; got it right here." Nodded Barney as he held up the crocodile muzzle.

"Good; we mustn't lose it *sneeze* or we'll have no hope of *cough* winning the challenge or escaping the *cough* crocodile without harm." Gulped Spider in worry. "I don't want any of *cough* us to become the croc's dinner!"

"Don't worry about it Spider; we'll protect you." Said Quana comfortingly. "You've got nothing to worry about."

"Except ending up *cough* like poor Vinnie." Said Spider with a shudder.

"That won't happen." Assured Quana warmly. "If that crocodile does _anything_ to you I'll turn it into a pair of boots." Said Quana before quickly adding. "I mean the same for everyone else as well of course, I don't want anyof my friends getting hurt."

* * *

**Confessional: Would you do that for me as well?**

**Quana: I've got to watch what I say; telling him everything right there and then with the others around … that would be pretty embarrassing. Though I did mean what I said.**

**Spider: Does Quana **_**like**_** me? I'm ***cough* **probably being too hopeful but ***cough* **if she did … that'd be ***sneeze* **nice. **(Spider smiles dreamily).

* * *

"I've seen crocodiles before." Said Jimmy. "Ted's uncle Bill has a crocodile farm down south … of course, we were never allowed anywhere out of our parents sight and we were always in a protective armoured jeep when looking at the reptiles."

"Ok; that's a start." Said Eleanor as she looked up and down the swampy boggy river. "Any idea where the best place would be to look for the crocodile? I know they like being in wetlands but as for the exact place I'm not as sure."

"I think they like it in humid areas … so I'd guess by the waterfall." Said Jimmy. "And as the river is flowing south I'd say the waterfall is north."

"Great idea Jimmy; I like your thinking." Grinned Barney as the group set off up the banks along the creek. "Onward to adventure!"

"So how exactly are we going to muzzle the crocodile?" Asked Eleanor. "Putting it on something like a dog wouldn't be so hard though might be a little mean … but crocodiles are pretty dangerous. Any ideas?"

The team, even Barney, was silent for a few moments, Eleanor had a good point. How does one go abut muzzling a crocodile? Spider broke the silence.

"I think … that we *cough* should locate the crocodile … and *cough* plan the next move." Suggested Spider helpfully.

"So basically what you're saying is … that we should make a plan." Said Quana. "I think that could work."

"To be honest I don't really like this challenge." Said Eleanor glumly. "Muzzling a crocodile against its will, putting it in a cage; it all seems quite mean to be honest."

"We're carrying on the crocodile hunter's eternal legacy." Said Jimmy in remembrance. "But its ok; I'm sure the crocodile will be released into the wild after the challenge. "

"Well; if you're sure." Smiled Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm sure … sure that I will be used very soon.**

**Eleanor: I don't like animal cruelty; its completely wrong, animals are our friends. Does Chris even realize this could be considered animal cruelty what with the muzzle and all?**

**Chris: I do know; and it's funny you stupid girl! Haha!**

**Barney: This challenge is pretty dangerous me hearties. Hmmm … what would Blackbeard do? More importantly what would George Lucas do?**

* * *

Team Grenade were all feeling a bit pissed off at Chris; he was making them go and wrangle a bear of all creatures. All six of them knew that it was a dangerous creature if provoked … actually scratch that; it was dangerous even if unprovoked, you all saw what happened to Cody … and the fact is that so did all six remaining members of Team Grenade. Also concerning was that Xaria looked pretty gloomy and had her head hung and her hands in her pockets.

"Does anybody know anything about bears?" Asked Lavender. "Animal knowledge isn't my strong point."

"Makes me wish Eleanor was on this team." Lamented Mable. "That way we'd easily win."

"How would having a pint sized girl on the team help?" Asked Kasimar as he ran a hand through his mohawk. "You've got me, and to a lesser extent Oscar so you girls don't have to worry your panties off. Yahaha!"

"Well I can think of two good reasons." Said Raven promptly. "Number one; she knows about animals so would be a valuable asset and number two, she's a heck of a lot nicer than you are. Meraly your elimination would not satisfy me I admit."

"And that elimination ain't gonna happen toots." Smirked Kasimar. "You guys may not like me but Chris likes me and that's all I need; with him on my side I think I have a clear shot at the million."

"Do you hear that?" Asked Oscar as he put a hand to his ear. "It's the winds of change."

* * *

**Confessional: Change the channel; I've seen this one before.**

**Kasimar: **(He is imitating Oscar mockingly). **Do you hear that, it's the wiiiiinds of change? Phfft! What is he; a philosopher? Laaaame! **

* * *

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Grunted Kasimar.

"You figure it out." Said Oscar airily. "Next time we lose the winds will blow strong."

"Yeah; I agree … when you vote off miss bumble bee for being a crybaby!" Sneered Kasimar as he walked ahead. The others glared hatefully after him.

"Maybe we should have voted him off instead of Wallace." Said Lavender. "At least Wallace was mildly useful and not such a nasty despicable scum bag. Don't let him get to you Xaria."

Upon not getting a response from her friend Lavender looked towards Xaria and was quite surprised to see a tear escaping her eye.

"Are you ok Xaria?" Asked Lavender. "Don't listen to Kasimar; he's just trying to get a reaction just like most bullies."

"Just leave me be." Said Xaria in a slightly cracking voice as she hurried ahead to distance herself from the others and also stay away from Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: And not cracked like an egg.**

**Xaria: Why do nasty people always go so far and nice people finish last? Or at least … I try to be nice. **(Xaria sniffles sadly).

**Oscar: I want to organize Kasimar an appointment with my fist but that would probably make things worse. Poor Xaria; she doesn't deserve all this.**

* * *

The three girls and one body builder exchanged glances of concern and a small silence arose.

"That was really nasty of Kasimar." Said Mable with a growl. "He's really upset Xaria and she was already pretty gloomy as well."

"Why is Xaria feeling like this?" Asked Lavender. "She ran out of the mess hall close to tears this morning so I guess it was to do with her present."

"Can't have exactly been a present then." Said Mable gloomily. "Unless I'm mistaken presents aren't supposed to make someone _that_ upset."

"You went to get her for the challenge Oscar; was she ok when you found her?" Asked Raven in concern.

Oscar blinked and looked a little shifty.

"In one word … no." Said Oscar gravely. "She was sobbing and sounded really upset. I don't know the whole story but when she mumbled something I heard one word of what she mentioned."

"What was it?" Asked Lavender.

"It was 'Jaron'; I'm guessing whoever she is she can't have been nice to Xaria; maybe she sent the letter Xaria received." Said Oscar with a weary and worried sigh.

"And it looks like Kasimar has just made everything even worse." Said Lavender as she tapped her fingers together in thought as they walked along.

"So what should we do?" Asked Raven.

"Step one; cheer Xaria up and make her feel better; step two, make Kasimar _sorry_." Said Lavender putting emphasis on the last word.

"Amen to that." Agreed Mable. "And then there's the whole _slight_ problem of wrangling a bear."

"As long as we keep our distance we should be ok." Said Raven before groaning. "Everything is worse with bears."

* * *

**Confessional: Everything is spikier with porcupines.**

**Lavender: Its times like this I wish I'd gone to the zoo more; maybe then I'd know more about this sort of thing. But our team has the most members so we still have an advantage in that; but isn't this whole thing kind of mean to animals?**

**Raven: I don't know why but I have a bad feeling in my bones. Well; whatever it is I have to make sure Kasimar loses. After what he did to Gary he has lost any chance of redemption to me.**

**Mable: I don't fancy my chances going up against a big bear, especially with what happened to Cody last season. Hey Chris … you're a maniac!**

**Chris: Shut up! I'm awesome and everybody likes me! And since you have blue hair what you say doesn't count! Haha!**

**Chef: Sometimes I think that Chris is a little pathetic; it's all about him according to his meek little mind. Dumbass.**

* * *

Team Jungle; or at least what was left of it, was still on the lookout for the horse. Uzuri was still miserable and quite depressed and Vinnie was thinking of a way he could cheer her up; seeing her cry was quite a sad sight, it was like kicking a puppy.

"_Maybe I could talk about horror movies with her; she likes those a lot. Here goes_." Thought Vinnie as he approached his upset crush.

Uzuri raised her head as he walked alongside her and sighed.

"Need something? Or are you going to poke fun at me like Chris did?" Asked Uzuri sadly.

"Not at all." Said Vinnie with an honest shake of his head. "I just wanted to talk to you, that's all."

"About what?" Asked Uzuri as she hung her head again.

"Just horror movies." Said Vinnie with a smile. "You like them don't you?"

"I guess; maybe a bit too much; shows how weird I am." Said Uzuri as she wiped a fresh tear from her eye.

"Well what's so bad about that?" Asked Vinnie. "I take it as a very good omen if somebody doesn't fit in with the crowd."

"I'm a living bad omen." Said Uzuri sadly. "So; what horror movie did you want to talk about?"

"A nightmare on elm street." Said Vinnie with a hopeful smile.

"Oh yeah; that was a good movie, it was the first horror movie I ever saw." Said Uzuri with a smile for the first time in hours. "Freddie was an interesting villain; the last words he ever spoke were, 'kids'."

"You can never trust a gardener." Said Vinnie while feeling relieved and fulfilled Uzuri was smiling again.

"He's better than Jason because he can get kids in the one place they aren't protected … their dreams." Said Uzuri before blinking. "But why do I like horror movies so much?"

"You have a unique and refined taste for movies I guess." Smiled Vinnie.

"Or it could be that you are a freak." Said Chris from over the intercom all of a sudden. The sound of sadistic laughter was heard ringing about.

Tears welled up in Uzuri's eyes and Vinnie had a sudden urge to really hurt Chris.

"Chris is right; I must be a freak to like that sort of stuff." Said Uzuri as tears poured out of her eyes.

"Don't think like that; Chris is completely wrong. Never lose hope, you're sure to cope and carry on. Don't cry." Said Vinnie as he put his organic hand on Uzuri's shoulder.

Uzuri just started sobbing and ran off ahead; Vinnie slowed down and a feeling a gloominess entered him. Tabitha caught up at that moment and glanced at Uzuri running off up ahead.

"That isn't the Uzuri I know." Said Tabitha with false sadness and masked amusement.

"Me neither; the Uzuri I know always has a smile on her face, a sunny attitude and despite being different is perhaps the most kind hearted person I've ever met." Said Vinnie in a voice full of gloom. "Today isn't turning out to be such a good day."

"It could still get better." Said Tabitha optimistically. "Just show her people do care; adding to that statement where is that horse?"

"I've got no idea; it's not like we're going to literally run into it." Said Vinnie with a shrug.

The sound of a neigh was heard very close by up ahead.

"Sorry Mr. Horsy." Said Uzuri from a distance away. "Please don't run me over."

"Hmmm … I stand fully corrected." Said Vinnie with a blink.

"Let's get that horse." Said Tabitha as she and Vinnie ran in the direction on the noise.

* * *

**Confessional: Morse horse code.**

**Tabitha: In a best case scenario we will win and Uzuri will cheer up … but I'd get by with just the former. Still; how do you ride a horse anyway?**

* * *

Tabitha and Vinnie quickly found Uzuri and the horse. The horse was standing still eating apples from the ground that had fallen from an apple tree within close proximity. Uzuri was leaning against a tree thinking deeply and looked depressed.

"Good job Uzuri; you found the horse." Complimented Tabitha falsely by force of habit as she looked over the four legged mammal. "So; how do we get on it because I doubt it is going to stay still, any ideas?"

"Well … the only horse I've ridden was tamed and had a saddle. This one is wild so it could be harder." Said Vinnie as he stroked his chin in thought.

"Maybe we could climb the apple tree and jump down." Suggested Uzuri without looking up. "But it's probably a stupid idea, just like me."

"Actually that could work." Said Tabitha. "We'll climb the tree and jump down onto it; after that we'll just ride it to camp."

"I guess I'll go at the front." Said Vinnie. "It'll be harder to steer the horse without reins but I'll make do."

"Let's get climbing." Said Tabitha as she began climbing up the apple tree to get to a decent height above the horse. Vinnie followed but at a slightly slower rate; having a metal arm can slightly hinder your climbing abilities believe it or not.

Uzuri looked at her, in her current mind, 'so called friends' climbing up and decided to climb with them, climbing trees was always fun and at the moment she could do with some fun. She approached the tree and began climbing it as fast as a rocket; in mere seconds she had overtaken Tabitha and Vinnie and reached the branch they had been heading towards.

"Whoa Uzuri; how did you climb so fast?" Asked Vinnie impressed.

"I used to climb a lot of trees when I was younger; strange I know but so am I." Said Uzuri with a sigh.

"Ok; on three we jump … none of you are scared of heights right?" Asked Tabitha to make sure she wouldn't have to hear any whining.

"Not me." Replied Vinnie.

"Me neither." Mumbled Uzuri.

"Ok then; one … two … three!" Yelled Tabitha boldly but quietly so the horse wouldn't run away.

The tall rich girl and two shorter misfits jumped from the branch and landed right on the horses back. The horse neighed in alarm and galloped off full speed through the clearings without any signs of wanting to slow down.

"Make it stop!" Wailed Tabitha as she held onto Vinnie. "This is like a roller coaster and I hate roller coasters!"

"Just hang on and keep your breakfast down!" Advised Vinnie as he attempted to gain control of the wild ride.

Uzuri was silent as she held onto Tabitha; this was actually pretty fun but she just couldn't find the motivation to cheer in excitement.

* * *

**Confessional: Ride like the wind Bullseye! **

**Vinnie: Well; that was pretty fast, it reminds me of the ride Oblivion at Alton Towers that I've heard of. At least none of us got hurt. Still; it would be nice if horses had built in breaks right? I would have thought Uzuri would be cheering in excitement; Chris has seriously upset her … I wish the biggest humiliation on him in the name of all that is good!**

**Tabitha:** (She looks a little woozy).** I don't like things that go **_**that**_** fast; its why I never liked unicorns in my youth. I know they don't exist but some fools will inevitably believe. Ooooh; I think I'm gonna be sick.**

**Uzuri: That was kinda fun … but it just didn't make me feel happy. **(Uzuri sighs sadly as a tear exits her eye.).

**Chris: The tears of a young person warm my heart! Haha! I may be a sadist but I'm a **_**likable**_** sadist. Uzuri sucks! And so does everyone else but me … especially my nansey!**

**Horse: **(Translated with English subtitles). **Ow! Why do people always ride on our backs? We don't like giving piggy back rides! You should ask a pig for something like that. Humph!**

* * *

Team Puzzle had reached the waterfall where the air would be most humid; adding to the muddiness of the surroundings it was the perfect area for a crocodile to hang out. Barney had the croc muzzle at the ready as the three teens, one preteen and one kid scanned the area to locate the crocodile.

"I feel *cough* scared." Gulped Spider as he wrung his hands and shivered a little. "I may not be *cough* the most appetizing piece of *cough* meat around … but Crocodiles have been known *sneeze* to eat almost anything."

"Don't sweat it Spider; you're not alone and we completely outnumber the crocodile." Assured Quana kindly. "And it may be asleep when we find it; quite unlikely … but still possible."

"One of the things I know about crocodiles is that while they have great downwards strength in their jaws their upward force is extremely weak in comparison. If we can get it to close its maw then we can easily hold it shut and attaché the muzzle … though I do feel bad for the crocodile." Said Eleanor factually.

"Don't feel too bad; give it half a chance and it'll rip your arms clean off with its pearly whites me heartie." Said Barney in a sunny voice. "Not exactly nice but neither is nature at times."

"What makes you say nature isn't nice?" Asked Eleanor.

"Do the words sharks and bears mean anything?" Asked Barney. "They've been known to make unprovoked attacks on humans … touchy beasties don'cha think?"

"I guess so. I admit not all animals are nice." Agreed Eleanor. "But some of them are so lovely like ferrets, puppies and cats … the tamed ones."

"And speaking of animals." Said Jimmy as he peered into the water a safe distance from the river bank and pointed. "I think we've found our reptile."

The other four looked where Jimmy was pointing and immediately saw they had located their target. In the water was the scaly crocodile with the front of its face floating above the water while the rest of it remained submerged in the base of the waterfall.

"Ok; how are we going to get our scaly nemesis onto dry land without going in there ourselves or getting bitten?" Asked Quana as a feeling of unease built up within her.

* * *

**Confessional: Getting a painful bite feels completely shite!**

**Quana: I was trying to calm Spider but truthfully he is quite right to be scared; we could get really hurt! If we get bitten we could be in hospital and sue the show … I do not know how well this challenge was thought through.**

**Chris: Ok; it wasn't thought through very well; but what are you gonna do about it? The challenge automatically qualifies as awesome because I thought of it! Besides; an injury is great for ratings and we have medical staff at the playa anyway. **

* * *

"I agree with *cough* Quana; going into the water with that *cough* living bear trap is suicide … we need *sneeze* to lure it out." Said Spider as he put a hand to his woozy stomach.

"But how to do actually do that is the real question." Said Jimmy. "Maybe we could lure it out with some meat ... but I don't think that even a crocodile will like Chef's charbroiled meat very much."

"Hey! I've got an idea." Beamed Eleanor with inspiration as she reached into her pocket and took out a few pieces of dried chicken. "Since crocodiles are carnivores they might like some chicken; its for Frost and Dandelion but I've got plenty at the cabin sooooo … I think I can spare a bit."

"Great idea lassy me cabin girl." Grinned Barney as he put his fake dagger into his pocket. "Ok; so you get it onto land with the farm bounty meat, Spider, Quana and myself will hold its jaw shut when its munching on its feast and Jimmy can get the muzzle on. After all; we need the strongest ones to hold the jaw so it can't fight back."

"Seriously Barney; if you can make up good plans on the spot like that you've got to be a genius of some kind." Said Quana with a smile. "I swear you're smarter than you let on."

"Err … well, that is to say … lets get that crocodile me hearties!" Said Barney with a sweat drop that went unnoticed.

* * *

**Confessional: Grade flunker or a Jack of all trades?**

**Barney: I feel conflicted in my mind. Part of me wants to tell them I'm a bit of a geek … the other part wants me to stay silent as a crab and have them think I'm to cool for words. Yaaaar; the reality is that nobody likes an ultra geek.**

**Spider: I hope this doesn't end ***cough*** up badly. I don't want to see anyone ***sneeze* **get hurt. If Quana got really hurt I don't ***gag* **know what I'd do.**

**Jimmy: I've never put a muzzle on anything before but it seems simple enough; just slip it on and tighten it; it'll almost be like tying your shoes.**

* * *

Eleanor got a large handful of the meaty ferret treats while Jimmy readied the muzzle from a distance and Spider, Quana and Barney hid from sight and prepared to spring out at the right time; Spider and Quana were both pretty on edge but they exchanged a glance and managed a smile.

Eleanor set down the pile of dried chicken and picked up a pebble. She tossed it into the water next to the crocodile and ran into the bushes and into safety.

The crocodile turned to the direction the sound had come from and sniffed the air; the first thing it smelt was the juicy scent of meat; if it had used its brain for guidance instead of its stomach it would have smelt the five nearby humans.

The crocodile swam to the edge of the river and clambered out onto land, it looked at the meat and its large maw watered. Without wasting time it began to eat its dinner. A moment later its maw closed as it savored the flavor.

"Now!" Yelled Barney as he sprung from the bushes and forced the crocodiles jaw shut and also to stay shut. A moment later Spider and Quana ran out and haled down the jaw while at the same time Quana sat on the crocodile to stop it getting away.

"Jimmy! Bring the muzzle!" Yelled Quana as she used all her strength to stop the crocodile from causing any harm.

Jimmy ran from his hiding place and quickly put the muzzle on the crocodile; he felt pretty scared but his three friends' expressions gave him the support he needed. A moment later he tightened it.

"I did it!" Cheered Jimmy.

"Good job cabin boy." Grinned Barney. "Now lets get this big boy back to camp."

"How do we do that?" Asked Eleanor as she quickly walked up and glanced at the still and angry reptile at her feet.

"We'll carry it over our heads; it'll be like Pikmin. It'll also be like being an ant. Now lets get this booty haul a'movin!" Said Barney as he and the others began to pick up the crocodile and head at a steady pace back to camp.

* * *

**Confessional: Fact of the day: Ants can lift forty times their own weight.**

**Quana: That went pretty well; I think all of besides Barney felt scared … that guy must have nerves of steel. Actually, forget steel, more like diamond because there is nothing harder than diamond. And Spider was so brave despite his worry. What a guy! **(Quana giggles and blushes).

**Spider: I felt on edge** *cough*** back there. I could sense everyone ***sneeze*** else's fear and in turn that ***gag*** scared me. But Quana was so brave and ***sneeze* **in control, is it any wonder that I ***cough*** love that girl?**

**Crocodile: **(Translated with English subtitles). **Oooo! Thosssse kidsss! If I ever find out who they were I'll call the crocodile policccccce and then they'll go to jail and I'll eat them! And ssssssseriously; muzzlessss are sssso uncomfortable!**

* * *

Chris was watching a few interns putting the finishing touches on three large cages; each had the icon of one of the teams on it. Just as the interns stopped working the three members of Team Jungle sped into camp on the horse which looked tired die to running for so long.

"Make it stop!" Wailed Tabitha.

"Whoa Nellie!" Yelled Vinnie. Instantly the horse screeched to a halt and its riders flew off and landed on the ground.

"I should have tried that in the first place." Groaned Vinnie as he got up to his feet and helped Uzuri up. "You ok Uzuri?"

"I'm fine; or as fine as is possible for me to be." Said Uzuri as she rubbed her head.

"That's good to know." Smiled Vinnie.

"How is it good? Come to think about it why do you care?" Sneered Chris. "She's just useless deadweight in this world. The sooner she is off my show the better; she's giving me AIDS just _looking_ at her. What a freak! Haha!"

Uzuri was silent for a moment as Vinnie shook in anger. A moment later tears began running out of Uzuri's eyes. She seemed to silently break down and ran from the others and into the woods.

"Haha! Yep, I did it again." Laughed Chris sadistically. "You still got it awesome me!"

"What was the point in that?" Growled Vinnie. "What did Uzuri do then?"

"Nothing; I just do it because its funny and misery builds character. Besides; it was pretty hilarious right?" Smirked Chris after he stopped laughing. "Oh; and Team Jungle wins immunity and first place."

"Well that's something." Said Vinnie before smirking. "Oh; and Chris."

"What?" Asked Chris with a yawn.

BAM!

Vinnie punched Chris in the balls with his metal fist.

"Think … fast." Said Vinnie slowly as Chris screamed in a high pitched wail.

"You meanie face! I hate you." Squeaked Chris in pain. "Well; you and Tabitha wait here until the other teams arrive; that's a rule!"

"What about Uzuri? She's in tears!" Snarled Vinnie.

"All the better for, ooooooh, ratings!" Whimpered Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: I rate Chris zero out of ten!**

**Vinnie: I don't get why Chris doesn't like Uzuri; what did she ever do to him? Uzuri may seem creepy and scary but once you get to know her you can see what a wonderful person she is … and she is an infinity better than Chris.**

**Tabitha: (**She is a light shade of green).** I have suddenly gained quite a dislike for horses. I admit that I have a weak stomach; fast speeds like that make it feel all churny inside.**

* * *

Team Grenade had arrived outside the bear cave; a light snoring was emitting from inside, no doubt it was from the bear. The six members stood quietly and began to formulate a plan.

"Ok everyone; we need to wrangle that bear … but that is going to be easier said than done. Does anyone have an idea?" Asked Lavender.

"Maybe I could knock it out." Suggested Oscar.

"I don't know if that is such a good idea; you may be strong but you remember what happened to Cody right?" Said Lavender with a whisper to avoid waking the bear.

"Maybe we could knock it out with rocks." Suggested Mable. "I'm sure Oscar could lift the heaviest ones."

"We don't want to cause the creature permanent damage." Said Raven while glancing at the cave.

"Why not?" Smirked Kasimar. "Animal suffering is funny, I remember the time I sucked up a hamster with the vacuum at my cousins hose. Boy her tears were funny!"

"You monster." Growled Xaria in shock; this was the first time she had spoken in a while. "And keep your voice _**down**_; do you want to wake up the bear?"

"I dunno; as long as it doesn't hurt me its all good." Shrugged Kasimar with a sneer. "And I don't see you coming up with a good idea stillbirth."

Xaria's eyes widened as she thought back to the letter she received that morning and she went silent as a few tears exited her eyes.

"Ooo; did I make the baby cry?" Laughed Kasimar.

BAM!

Oscar punched Kasimar in the face which gave the bully a black eye to go with the one from the previous day, his face was almost comical.

"Do … not … _**EVER**_ … upset … Xaria." Snarled Oscar in a voice of rage and intimidation. "Do I made myself perfectly clear?"

Kasimar was actually shivering in pure fear at the RAGE on Oscar's face and seemed to be fighting the urge to say something; he failed to fight the urge it seemed.

"Make me!" Spat Kasimar.

"Guys … why has the snoring stopped?" Asked Mable nervously.

A moment later the campers heard a growl and turned to the cave; in front of it and standing meters away was the bear, the very same one that had mauled poor Cody.

"Oh #bleep#." Said Xaria as she paled in fear.

* * *

**Confessional: Here comes trouble … I'm outta here!**

**Bear: **(Translated with English subtitles). **I wasn't going to kill them; I just wanted to rough them up to teach them a lesson for interrupting my beauty sleep! And when I wake up I'm ALWAYS cranky!**

* * *

The six members of Team Grenade looked at the angry and powerful bear in fear; even Oscar looked quite worried. The bear took another step forward and that was all it took for Kasimar's dirty cowardice to kick in.

"Don't hurt me!" Screamed Kasimar as he pushed Raven, the closest person to him, towards the bear before running away screaming in fear and flailing his arms. "Take her! I don't wanna die! Waaaaaaah!"

Raven looked up at the bear in fear as it growled; before Lavender, Oscar or any of the others could do anything the bear took a swipe at Raven which knocked her onto her side and she clutched the spot it had swiped as she screamed in pain.

"Raven!" Yelled Mable in panic at her fallen team mate.

BAM and POW!

Oscar had charged at the bear and was now beating the ever loving crap out of it. While the bear was being attacked by the muscular body builder Lavender, Xaria and Mable quickly got Raven a safe distance away from the large mammal.

"Aaah! It hurts so much." Groaned Raven; not only does something like this hurt a lot to any normal person but it hurts someone with a low tolerance to pain even more, someone like Raven.

"Is she ok?" Asked Xaria in worry.

"I think the force of the bear's swipe broke her leg beneath her knee." Said Mable gravely. "We've gotta get her back to camp and fast!"

"What about the bear?" Asked Lavender.

The three girls looked to the bear and saw it was now unconscious and Oscar was carrying it on his back; it was putting his muscles to the test and when he was angry or upset he became stronger.

"Actually … I think Oscar's got it covered." Murmured Lavender. "Raven needs medical attention; lets get back to camp and fast!"

The team quickly set off back to camp. As fast as they could go. One thing was for sure; if they lost Kasimar wasn't weaseling his way out of THIS one, not … a … friggin … chance.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd write a get well card if it was physically possible for me to do so.**

**Mable: Raven's wound looked bad, but it should heal if its treated quickly. I'd say she should be able to get around on crutches but she won't be able to walk for a few weeks. It's a good thing I took that medical class at school.**

**Lavender: Oh my goodness; Raven looked in so much pain. When I get hold of Kasimar I'm gonna-** (Do things we cannot mention in a teen rated show. Seriously, she and Uzuri should share ideas! And I never would have thought of torturing someone with lemon juice, barbed wire and a telephone in SUCH a way!)

**Kasimar: **(He is breathing deeply). **That was terrifying; I could have gotten hurt! Sure, a little bit of a shame for the shy girl to get hurt … but hey, rather her than me you know. And the others are gonna vote her off in sympathy if we lose so I'm here for another day. Oh my heart.**

**Oscar: **(He is silent and just stares into space while clenching his fists).

* * *

Team Puzzle arrived in camp carrying the crocodile; the sun was starting to set now and they were starting to feel tired from carrying the crocodile for so long. They had passed a tearful Uzuri on the way back; she had said something about watching the sunset from the cliff. As they approached the cages in camp they saw a horse in a cage as well as Vinnie and Tabitha standing around. There was no sign of Team Grenade so it looked like they had come in second.

They dropped off the crocodile inside the cage and quickly shut the door and let out exhausted gasps of tiredness.

"Yaaaar me hearties; I'm as tired as a migrating sea turtle." Said Barney as he took a few deep breaths. "Keeping ones arms up that long causes a lot of discomfort savvy?"

"I never want to see another crocodile ever again." Said Quana as she shook her arms to get the circulation going again.

"The feeling is mutual." Panted Jimmy. "But we're safe from a vote off right?"

"Good point." Said Eleanor.

"And Team Puzzle has arrived and have finished in second place." Announced Chris to everyone in the area. "Good job with the crocodile; I was expecting someone to get eaten. Haha!"

"You're *cough* sick." Said Spider is pure disgust at the sadistic host.

"Look who's talking." Smirked Chris.

Before anyone could make a response to that remark Kasimar arrived into camp; he looked out of breath and pale as a white sheet or maybe a ghost, either way he had lost some color.

"What happened to *cough* you? You look like you've seen a ghost." Said Spider as he and everyone else looked at the bully.

"Shut your #bleep# face bug!" Growled Kasimar. "I was nearly attacked by a BEAR a few minutes ago! It's a good thing I'm a fast runner."

"That'll make for good TV." Smirked Chris. "So … where are the rest of Team Grenade?"

"How the hell should I know? Maybe they got eaten by the bear or something." Shrugged Kasimar. "Boy I need a drag or something to calm my nerves."

"Smoking kills you early you know." Said Quana with crossed arms and a frown.

"Like I need to take lip from a girl." Sneered Kasimar before rising his eyebrows slyly. "Still; maybe you could help me _feel better_."

"Shut up!" Snapped Spider bravely before he realized what he had said.

"We need a doctor stat!" Yelled Lavender as she and the other girls ran into camp carrying Raven who looked in pain. Oscar followed behind them carrying the bear.

"What happened here?" Asked Chris as he and the other campers looked at Raven, most of the latter looking worried.

"Raven got attacked by a bear!" Explained Mable in worry for her friend. "The bear took us by surprise and Kasimar pushed Raven towards it to save his own worthless hide."

"It was me or her and I'd much rather it be her." Said Kasimar casually.

"How can you not care?" Asked Oscar in disgust as he dropped the bear into the cage. "You're sniveling cowardliness could have given Raven permanent damage! Why don't you feel remorse for once?"

"I can't feel remorse if I'm not sorry." Shrugged Kasimar.

"You horrid little-" Began Oscar before Chris interrupted him.

"And now that everyone has wrangled their animals it looks like this challenge is over!" Said Chris with a smile and a clap. "Despite having the least members and a clear disadvantage Team Jungle arrived here first so they win first place and today's special prize."

"So what is the prize?" Asked Tabitha. "Maybe something to stop my head from spinning."

"Nope; today's prize is …

…

…

…

…

…

…

A complete collection of the Creature Comfort DVD's!"

"That doesn't sound so bad." Said Tabitha with a smile. "I think I need a lie down."

Tabitha left to her cabin while Chris continued to reveal the results.

"Team Puzzle has finished in second place and as you all know by now, that means no prize but no elimination either. Team Puzzle stays as it is."

Team Puzzle cheered while Team Grenade looked disappointed for a moment before grinning and smirking at Kasimar.

"And that means that Team Grenade, the team that had a number advantage for so long, has lost and will be down to five in just a few hours."

"Well Raven; too bad you got hurt I guess; but her, I'm not complaining, it keeps me here another day." Smirked Kasimar confidently.

"Oh really? Who says we're voting off Raven?" Asked Lavender with a sly and evil smile.

"Yeah; Raven is our friend which is a lot more than I can say for you." Said Mable with an expression similar to Lavender.

"What?" Asked Kasimar in shock. "But you've got to vote her off! She's injured!"

"Maybe so; but your cowardliness earlier made you unredeemable in my eyes." Said Xaria with crossed arms despite looking a little depressed.

"What are you saying; you're joking right guys?" Said Kasimar nervously. He knew he was in DEEP trouble now.

"Well; it's sort of a secret … but we'll tell you." Said Oscar as he leant to Kasimar's ear. "_**WE'RE VOTING YOU OFF**_!"

Kasimar leapt away from Oscar and looked horrified.

"No!" Gulped Kasimar.

"Yep; this should be a fairly quick and enjoyable ceremony." Said Lavender. "Get the video camera Mable."

"Will do." Nodded Mable with a smirk.

There was the sound of chuckling and everyone turned to see Chris laughing with a pretty nasty expression on his face.

"What are you smiling about? I thought Kasimar was your favorite." Said Raven while holding her leg in pain.

"Well; you look so eager to boot Kasimar and after what happened … I guess it's quite understandable." Said Chris with a look of understanding on his face; that look then became twistedly sadistic. "But your contracts clearly state in section fifty paragraph seven lines two to four that, 'In the case of a camper being hurt by an animal, that camper, if injured enough, is immediately eliminated from the game and taken to the playa for medical attention', so, sorry to burst your bubble … but Raven is out."

Everyone was silent and the five good members of team grenade had their jaws drop in horror and shock; Kasimar meanwhile looked stoked and elated.

"You gotta be #bleep# kidding me!" Screamed Lavender in pure rage. "That is so unfair! Raven deserves to be here infinitely more than Kasimar; and Team Jungle still got to choose who to vote for after Gary was eliminated! How is this any different!"

"Because Gary was attacked by another camper, not an animal, and that is completely allowed. Say your goodbyes to Raven; she'll be on the boat of losers within the hour. I'd say goodbye but I've got better things to do like have a latté and read Playboy. See you tomorrow campers who are not as awesome as me."

And with that Chris left without another word; as he left Mable threw a rock at him which made Chris run away crying in pain.

* * *

**Confessional: The phrase 'break a leg' has never been more inappropriate. **

**Lavender: **(She looks batshit FURIOUS)** How can Chris get away with all this? That was so unfair and biased! Isn't it obvious he's tilting the game in Kasimar's favor? His karma is going to be on him like skin … on … a … BODY!**

**Raven:** (her left leg is in a cast).** Well; it was fun while it lasted, at least I'll be with Gary right? But I didn't even get revenge on Kasimar. I guess I'll leave the task to my team mates. It has been a great summer so far, I've gained so much out of this show. I just wish it could have ended under better circumstances … I'm a little disappointed as well as angry at Chris and Kasimar but if you only focus on what has been left behind you'll never get to see what lies ahead.**

**Spider: I'm starting to feel kinda ***cough* **scared; three campers have left because of ***cough* **injuries. First Andy, then Gary and now ***sneeze* **Raven … what if I'm next? **(Spider shivers in fright).

**Kasimar: Raven getting her leg broken by a bear? Eh, tragic, but it matters little. She's just one of around six billion; and it also means I'm here another day and another one of my competition had bit the dust. Either way you look at it I'm safe and in just a few weeks I'll be swimming in money. Maybe I could by a tank to blow up a hospital or something. **(Kasimar smirks evilly).

* * *

"Say; did any of you see where Uzuri went?" Asked Vinnie to the other two teams. "She left into the forest crying earlier because of Chris."

"Hmmm, Oh! Yes, I did *cough* see her. She passed us while we *cough* were carrying the crocodile, she said *sneeze* she was going to watch the sunset from *cough* the cliff. Probably to calm herself down." Said Spider as he thought back to earlier. "And after today I *cough* don't blame her at all."

"Thanks Spider." Said Vinnie as he took off into the woods to find Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional: Find her fast!**

**Vinnie: If I can just speak to Uzuri one on one without Chris interrupting I might be able to make her smile again. I just hope I succeed.**

* * *

A short while later the sun was setting on the horizon; Team Grenade stood around the Bonfire Ceremony Pit to say goodbye to Raven. She was now on crutches and had her left leg in a cast. The interns were loading her luggage on the boat while Chef was waiting for Raven to get on the boat; after what had happened he was willing to wait as long as was necessary.

"Goodbye Raven." Said Mable as she hugged her friend in farewell. "Its such a shame you had to lose in these circumstances."

"Don't worry about it Mable; I had a great time and I'm not a stuttering shy girl anymore, I even have a boyfriend. It's been a great twelve days. The money would have been nice but money can't buy happiness." Smiled Raven.

"Yes it can." Scoffed Kasimar. "That's what hookers are for … duh!"

Raven frowned at the bully and threw caution to the wind.

WHACK!

Kasimar fell onto the ground in pain with a bruise on his head where Raven had whacked him with one of her crutches. The other four cheered for the former shy girl, now a social and lovable plucky girl. As they waved one of them put her hands in her pockets and walked away with a small sigh.

"See you around guys; I'll be rooting for you." Said Raven as she headed for the dock of shame and the boat of losers. "Just make sure Kasimar doesn't win, ok?"

"Don't worry Raven; we'll make sure." Promised Lavender as she waved to her friend.

Raven waved to her friends one last time before Chef Hatchet helped her on board the boat of losers which started up and drove of into the night. Within a minute it was gone.

"So much for having a number advantage." Said Mable. "Well; we're down to five now; the same amount as Team Puzzle. Too bad Raven is gone and not Kasimar."

The three scowled at the bully in pain on the ground for a moment.

"Yeah; it'll be weird without Raven here." Agreed Lavender. "But we've got to keep going and we've got to work harder now."

"And we have to make sure Kasimar doesn't win as well." Said Oscar as the team besides Kasimar began to walk back to their cabin; it was then that Oscar noticed something. "Say; where's Xaria?"

"I don't know; she was with us just a few minutes ago." Said Mable.

Lavender looked around the area and after a moment of searching she spotted Xaria; the moody girl was sitting on the beach watching the sunset and looked deep in thought and seemed a little depressed.

"She seems really unhappy." Noted Mable. "Maybe we should go and talk to her."

"Hmmm … maybe it would be better if just one of us did." Said Lavender while giving Oscar a sideways glance. He immediately got the message.

"I'll go and talk to her." Said Oscar calmly. "She's one of my best friends and I hate seeing my friends upset."

Oscar started to head towards Xaria while Mable glanced at Lavender.

"It there something you're not telling me?" Asked Mable as she and Lavender began to walk back to their cabin.

"Nothing illegal; Oscar just cares about Xaria feelings is all." Smiled Lavender while giving Mable another of her sideways glances.

"Oh … I get you." Said Mable as she started to smile. "He _likes _her."

"You could say that." Said Lavender with a chuckle.

* * *

**Confessional: Time for some TLS; tonic, lemon juice … and crap! LOLOLOLOL!**

**Oscar: Ok; Xaria seemed quite upset and I had to try and cheer her up. I can tell something is bothering her but maybe I shouldn't ask. Just got to make her cheer up … maybe I should just improvise.**

* * *

Xaria was sitting on the soft sand of the beach and was watching the glorious sunset. She felt upset; not just because of the nasty letter she had gotten earlier, but also because Raven, a nice person, had been injured and eliminated while Kasimar, practically the devil himself, was still here. If only Chris hadn't interfered.

"I always used to think good would triumph over evil." Said Xaria sadly. "Boy was I wrong."

Xaria stared out at the setting sun in silence; as she did so she heard someone walk up and sit down next to her.

"Nice sunset isn't it." Said Oscar in an attempt to start conversation.

"Hey Oscar." Mumbled Xaria. "Need something?"

"Well; I came to see if you're alright." Said Oscar. "You've been looking pretty down all day, not as much as Uzuri but you still seem quite upset."

"Why are you so concerned?" Asked Xaria with a small sigh.

"Because you're my friend, that's why." Said Oscar nicely. "And unlike Kasimar I care about how people feel."

"It's nothing; it hardly matters." Said Xaria as she looked away and back at the sunset.

"It must matter a bit for you to have been sad all day and run out of the mess hall in tears earlier." Said Oscar as he put his hands on his knees. "If you want to talk about it I'm listening.

Xaria looked like she wanted to say something but couldn't bring herself to.

"Oscar … I can't." Said Xaria hesitantly.

"Ok, I understand." Said Oscar with a nod. "But can I ask you one question."

"Well … sure, I don't see why not." Shrugged Xaria.

"Ok … who is Jaron?" Asked Oscar gently.

Xaria froze on the spot and her heart began to beat a bit faster. She looked panicked as she looked at Oscar.

"Where did you hear that name?" Asked Xaria nervously.

"I heard you mumble it when you left the cabin this morning after I came to talk to you." Explained Oscar. "Was she a bully or something? If you want I could _tell_ her to leave you alone."

"No she's not a bully … well, sort of, but not exactly." Said Xaria before sighing and explaining the truth. "She's my sister. My highly abusive sister."

Oscar was silent as was Xaria and the only sounds heard were the splashing of the waves.

"She was never perfect … but we got along … sometimes. But one day she joined a gang … a gang of nasty people." Said Xaria in remembrance as a single tear exited her eye. "From stealing to beating kids up they always caused trouble yet nobody caught them … until someone squealed."

"Who squealed?" Asked Oscar but he had a slight idea who.

"Me. When she beat the utter crap out of a physically handicapped kid I saw it and I told the principal; she and the gang were then expelled. After that whenever our parents went out she beat me up. I stayed quiet for as long as I could … but eventually I was getting quite hurt so … I went to the police."

"Oh gosh; were you ok?" Asked Oscar in great concern.

"I am now; I had set up a camera from time to time and it filmed what Jaron did. I took that to the police as evidence. She got arrested, there was a trial, and she was jailed. She'll be out in five years … but when she is I don't know what I'll do."

Xaria had a fresh batch of tears coming from her eyes and she looked quite sad. Oscar did the first thing that came to mind; she gave her a comforting hug with his strong arms.

"Thanks." Smiled Xaria lightly when he released. "I needed that."

"So … is that why you are a little distrusting and negative?" Asked Oscar.

"Truthfully … yes." Said Xaria as she hung her head. "After years of suffering it kind of changed my outlook on everything; I basically became the negative girl at school. Nowadays I don't have many friends. I don't know why I'm telling you all this … but it feels good to tell someone."

"I'm glad you feel a little better." Said Oscar with a smile. "You know; I haven't had the happiest past either."

"Really? How come?" Asked Xaria curiously. "I would have thought you'd be the most popular person in school."

"I'm kinda popular nowadays … but I haven't always been as strong as I am now." Admitted Oscar. "When I was younger I was quite, well, weedy and I got picked on a lot. It had been going on since I was in the third grade and I was just tired off it."

"So what did you do?" Asked Xaria while wondering how Oscar could have possibly been not strong.

"I trained; all the time." Said Oscar as he looked at his muscles. "I worked out all the time whenever I wasn't busy with school work. In a year or so I was seriously strong. When the bully who started it all cornered me I was ready for him. Looking back on it I probably shouldn't have broken his arm … but he was intending to bludgeon me with a metal pipe."

"Whoa…" Said Xaria as she trailed off.

"Since then I have used my strength to protect other people from bullies so they don't go through what I did." Said Oscar. "This may be a bad question; but can I have a look at that letter you got earlier if that's ok with you?"

"Sure." Shrugged Xaria as she reached into her pocket and handed it to Oscar while looking sadly out at the sunset.

Oscar read through it and was pretty disgusted and appalled at what was written. But after he was finished one line in particular had caught his eye.

_And do you think that muscular guy would like you back?_

Oscar's heart beat a little faster; he assumed the muscular guy was himself … did Xaria like him?

"This is not right." Said Oscar as he handed the letter back to Xaria. "Your sister just sounds … deranged and evil, no offense."

"None taken, it's true." Shrugged Xaria with a sniffle.

"Erm, Xaria … do you _like_ me?" Asked Oscar. "The letter refers to a muscular guy and I'm assuming that he is me."

"Yes; I do quite like you. We may not have started off too well … but you're a really nice guy and you always do what's right. I wish I known you a few years ago." Said Xaria sadly. "I know you don't like me like that so you don't have to tell me."

Oscar thought what to say next and a sudden idea entered his head; he hoped that this would work and maybe cheer Xaria up.

"You know Xaria; I know a song that has helped me through hard times … and I'm hoping it will help you through hard times such as now as well." Said Oscar.

"You're going to sing?" Asked Xaria raising an eyebrow in amusement. "No offense but you don't look like the singing type."

"Not usually but I am good at this song … and I mean every word of it." Said Oscar as he cleared his throat and began to sing.

_You've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

_When the road looks rough ahead_

_And you're miles and miles _

_From your nice warm bed_

_You just remember what your old pal said_

_Girl you've got a friend in me_

_Yah you've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

_You've got some troubles_

_And I've got em too_

_There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you_

_We stick together_

_And we see it through_

_Because you've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

_Some other folks might be a_

_Little bit smarter than I am_

_Bigger and stronger too_

_Maybe_

_But none of them_

_Will ever love you the way I do_

_It's me and you girl_

_And as the years go by_

_Our friendship will never die_

_You're gonna see it's our destiny_

_You've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

_You've got a friend in me_

Oscar stopped singing and smiled at Xaria who was looking at him with wide eyes and a big smile.

"That's my favorite song; it's from Toy story … something I admit I'm a big fan of." Said Oscar with a little embarrassment. "You see … I really like you Xaria. I voted for you on day one and that was a big mistake on my part. So … want to watch the sunset?"

There was a whole second of silence before Xaria laughed in joy and pounced onto Oscar and gave him a big kiss! After holding it for a few seconds they parted and both were smiling.

"Yes; I would like to watch the sunset." Said Xaria with a smile, one of the first in a long time.

Oscar put an arm around Xaria as they looked out at the setting sun and the shiny evening waves. Xaria leaned against Oscar and for the first time in years she felt truly happy.

* * *

**Confessional: Why don't I get a kiss? Is it because I have no mouth or something?**

**Xaria: **(She is smiling happily). **I've never dated anyone in my life before … but I think Oscar is really the perfect guy; he listened to me all that time and was genuinely concerned for me. He's just like Ace Rimmer; what a guy! And whoa, he's a good kisser. **(Xaria giggles and smiles).

**Oscar: It took time and it took effort … but Xaria is happy once more. What a terrible past that was. Well; sister to Xaria or not, if Jaron tries to hurt her again I'll show her persuasion and reason.** (Oscar holds up his two firsts for a moment before smiling). **Despite everything that has happened … I'm glad I entered this show.**

* * *

Uzuri was sitting on the grass at the top of the thousand foot cliff looking out at the sunset; she had always liked the sky at late times in the day, it was quite beautiful. She sat pulling her knees up to herself and thinking deeply. She had been sitting, watching the sunset and thinking for about almost an hour now.

"_What a beautiful sunset; as beautiful as I once thought life to be. Always the outcast and never the friend, that's me_." Thought Uzuri sadly. "_I really thought they liked me; I should have known it was too good to be true, I guess I'm destined to be alone and friendless all my life. Why can't everyone just be excellent to each other?_"

Uzuri continued to sit and look out at the sunset and the island's forest below her. As she sat Vinnie arrived; he felt tired due to walking up the steep hill without rest but Uzuri was more important to him than getting rid of the tired feeling in his legs.

"Uzuri; are you ok?" Asked Vinnie as he walked up to Uzuri and sat down next to her.

"Hey Vinnie." Said Uzuri in a sad sort of voice. "Come here to call me a freak like Chris?"

"That couldn't be further from the truth; I'm here to cheer you up and see if you are alright. You've been so upset all day and its killing me inside to see you like this." Said Vinnie. "Why are you up here anyway?"

"To be alone." Replied Uzuri. "I came up here so nobody would call me a freak or tell me horrible things like Chris did this morning."

"Chris is a pathetic asshole; you shouldn't listen to what he says." Said Vinnie to support his upset crush. "He's just a little person trying to make others feel as little as him."

"Can't get much littler than me." Said Uzuri with a tiny sad smile. "I'm so short."

"So am I; but it's not really so bad. I like you just how you are." Smiled Vinnie.

"Why would anyone like me?" Asked Uzuri bitterly. "I'm obsessed with crazy things, I have never had any friends before this show and even the ones I made here didn't really like me. Not to mention my own parents didn't send me a gift like everyone else's parents did."

"They might have sent you one; it could have got delayed in the mail." Said Vinnie truthfully to calm Uzuri down. "And you know; I think you're one of the greatest and most wonderful people it's ever been my pleasure to meet."

"But why would they want to hang around the creepy crazy girl instead of someone normal?" Asked Uzuri as she looked at Vinnie with sad eyes.

"Why wouldn't they want to? Look at you! You're kind hearted, you're a free spirit, you're funny, you always do the right thing, you're unique and, well, you're beautiful." Said Vinnie, the last part he said shyly.

"You don't man that." Sighed Uzuri though she smiled for a brief moment. "I appreciate you trying to make me feel better though."

"And why would I try to do that if I didn't like you?" Asked Vinnie with a smile.

"I don't know; to get me all excited so you could get me more upset?" Guessed Uzuri.

"No … because I care about you, as do a lot of other people." Said Vinnie as he put his organic hand on Uzuri's shoulder.

"I don't know; I'm still a freak aren't I?" Asked Uzuri as a single tear exited her eye.

"You know what; I think I can prove to you that people care … especially me." Said Vinnie as he edged a little closer to Uzuri. "_Oh please let this work_."

"How?" Asked Uzuri doubtfully.

Vinnie gently wrapped his arms around Uzuri, being extra careful with his metal one, and gave her a kiss on the lips. Uzuri's eyes widened in surprise but after a moment she closed them and began kissing Vinnie back. A few moments later they parted with Uzuri looking lighter than air and Vinnie looking a little nervous about what he had just done.

"So Uzuri; does that show you people care?"

Uzuri was silent for a moment as she looked at Vinnie.

"… … YES! Whoa Vinnie; is that what a kiss is like?" Asked Uzuri in her normal childish, sunny and cheerful voice. "That was wonderful! Chris was so wrong, people do care …"

Uzuri then trailed off as she looked at Vinnie.

"So … do you _like_ me?" Asked Uzuri nervously and sweetly. "Like, really _like_ me?"

"Guilty as charged." Smiled Vinnie. "I've been attracted to your for a while and recently I think I've fallen in love with you. I've been trying to cheer you up all day; it pained me to see you so sad."

"Sorry that I've been so miserable; it's just … Chris's words really upset me. And I've never had any friends before coming on this show. But I shouldn't have listened to that bloody stupid ripped carcass, what does he know about caring?" Smiled Uzuri widely. "And you know what Vinnie?"

"What is it?" Asked Vinnie.

"I love you too." Giggled Uzuri shyly. "I have for a while now; I even drew a sketch of you in my sketchbook. Its funny isn't it? We're both pretty oddball and both of us are attracted to each other like Jigsaw is to torture. Teehee!"

"Its wonderful to have you back Uzuri." Said Vinnie with a smile. "But … does this mean we're together now?"

"Only if you want to be." Said Uzuri with a smile ands a look of nervousness. "I mean, I'd like us to be, but only if you want to."

"I do want." Said Vinnie with a grin matching Barney's. "So; shall we watch the sunset or go back to camp?"

"Lets watch the sunset; it's a very nice evening." Smiled Uzuri. "And maybe later we could watch one of the horror movies I bought along … but I warn you mister, I get really cuddly when I watch a great horror movie! Teehee!"

"I look forward to it." Smiled Vinnie as he put his organic arm around Uzuri as they watched the sunset.

* * *

**Confessional: Achievement unlocked! Two couples in one episode!**

**Uzuri: **(She is bouncing up and down in excitement). **This is wonderful! I really do have friends and now I have a boyfriend! No matter what Chris says now he can't upset me! He's a big jerk face! I finally feel complete after years of loneliness. I love this show … and Vinnie of course! Teehee!**

**Vinnie: While this day started off pretty bad it is no burned into my memory as one of the best that I have ever had; I feel content with today. But I wonder what horror movie Uzuri is planning on watching; I hope it isn't too graphic.**

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame while the sun was almost completely set. He smiled for the audience as he began to do the daily outro.

"And so it looks like the freaks have found love, Uzuri and Vinnie I mean. And so have Oscar and Xaria. And with Raven gone Team Grenade no longer has a number advantage. Who will be the next person to walk the dock of shame? Will Kasimar's action ever catch up with him? How long will the new couples last? And will Spider ever grow a pair and tell Quana how he feels? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes: - N/A Raven was eliminated due to injury.

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven

* * *

And sadly Raven is gone. It's a shame really as I liked her, but it had to be done. You'll see her again pretty soon though. Kasimar may have JUST managed to escape this time but his luck's gonna run our sooner or later, and when it does … (Grins evilly).

Next time: The third episode of Total Ousted Aftermath where Irene, Wallace, Gary and Raven are interviewed.


	27. Total Ousted Alphabet 3

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the season that must never be named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all 28 OC's in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains evil laughter, hair related discrimination, blue jelly and heavily implied cuddling. But it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note:** Here is the third aftermath; this one is probably the best yet. I had a good time writing it and having the losers get interviews … and wallace was fun as always. I hope you al enjoy it, and if you enjoy it then why not leave a review? I'll read and respond to them all.

Commence interviews!

* * *

A large stage in a fairly large room was filled to the brim with an audience of people from all backgrounds and of all ages. The audience was excited as they would be seeing the four most recent losers get interviewed. A few people were in the audience selling popcorn, hotdogs or roast ducks. On the stage was a trio of comfy arm chairs and a large three row sofa with a newly added sign above it that had the words 'peanut gallery' written on it. Sitting on it on the bottom row from left to right were Nakia, Patch, Daisy Carlton, Yessica, Fifi and Hector. On the middle row from left to right were Andy and Zita. Sitting on one of the three armchairs in the center of the stage was Eddie Lynmoire and sitting in the second was Sasha Tasset. The former was writing some notes in a note book and looked pretty focused while the latter was in 'the zone' playing a game that was making a few beeps and explosion sounds.

"Ok Mr. Lynmoire and Miss Tasset, you're on in three, two, one."

Eddie pocketed the note book and waved while Sasha waved without looking up from her game.

"Hello again viewers; I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Waved Eddie

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Said Sasha as she continued playing her game.

There was a moment of silence and Sasha paused her game and looked up.

"Aren't you going to say the no relation joke?" She asked.

"I've come to the conclusion it isn't very funny; we look nothing alike anyway. I'll drop the joke for now and besides, I'm sure I can think of another joke for the next episode." Explained Eddie. "And the show has started; maybe you should pause the game."

"…Fine." Pouted Sasha as she paused the game and put her DS on the arm of the chair. "Hello fans of Total Drama. Day twelve has ended and that means another episode of Total Ousted Alphabet. We've got quite an interesting group of losers to interview tonight."

"And sadly two of them are, um, _slightly_ injured." Said Eddie hesitantly.

"I'd say a bit more than slightly." Said Sasha deadpan toned. "One of them had their legs broken and the other got hurt by a bear, it makes me hate Kasimar even more since he was responsible for both of those injuries."

"Aaaaargh! I'm scared of bears, Kasimar and injuries." Wailed Carlton as he covered his eyes.

"And that brings us along to introducing the peanut gallery thus far." Said Eddie as he gestured to the eight former campers sitting on the large three rowed sofa. "First up is Nakia; the girl who hates Spider for no good reason, loves her hair … and that's it."

"I do have reasons!" Snapped Nakia as she brushed her silky brown hair. "And you will show me respect!"

"Give a wave to Patch." Said Sasha to stop Nakia from causing trouble. "He has a big gut but also a big heart and an even bigger love for food."

"*Blech*!" Burped Patch which made Nakia and Daisy recoil in disgust as they were closest to him.

"Yuck! What _have_ you been eating fatso?" Asked Daisy in repulsion.

"Food." Said Patch as he scratched his butt.

"Next is Daisy, the girl who loves school, snitching and getting her own way." Said Eddie as the audience booed the bratty teachers pet.

"If I see a drip of blue jelly I'll sue you!" Snarled Daisy as she drew a finger across her throat threateningly.

"Sadly we ran out of it and we won't have more for a few days." Said Sasha in disappointment.

"Good." Smirked Daisy as she crossed her arms smugly.

"Next up is Carlton; his fears are many and his brave moments are in scant supply and are far and few between." Smiled Eddie as he gestured to the wimpy teen.

"Don't look at me! I'm scared of attention! It might make me melt." Whimpered Carlton as he shivered in fear.

"Say hello to Yessica, the girl who loves to swim and was one of Tabitha's victims." Smiled Sasha as Yessica gave a wave to the camera.

"Hi everybody." Said Yessica cheerfully. "I bet you wish you were here; the playa is wonderful."

"Amen to that." Agreed Andy.

"Next in the line up is Fifi; our resident feminist with a cool afro and the desire for complete gender equality." Introduced Sasha.

"I look forward to when Kasimar is interviewed so we can throw stuff at him." Smirked Fifi as the other losers nodded in agreement.

"The last person on the bottom row is Hector; an expert at math and a so called cool nerd and smart guy." Said Eddie.

"Greetings men, women and children." Said Hector with a small wave.

"Starting the middle row is Zita; a girl with a tendency to steal stuff but has a good heart despite it all." Smiled Sasha as Zita waved.

"Go Team Puzzle." Whooped Zita.

"And to finish up the introduction, we have Andy, everyone's favorite Japanese space fan who had a dislocated shoulder … which is now completely healed!" Finished Eddie loudly.

"What can I say; the Playa has got really good medical staff." Shrugged Andy with a smile.

"Unfortunately, and in some cases most fortunately, those nine have been voted off and are out of the game." Said Sasha. "Though I wasn't betting on any of them, it's mostly a shame … but everyone's going to lose bar one person."

"I should have been the winner." Said Daisy with a foul snarl. "But everyone else voted me off because they were jealous of me! They must be retarded."

"That attitude is precisely the reason I voted for you on day one!" Said Andy as he crossed his arms.

"I should have voted for you instead of that stupid chef." Snapped daisy.

"In case you've forgotten I won immunity in that challenge." Smirked Andy.

A chorus of 'Ooooooooo's' rung out from the audience. Daisy crossed her arms and stayed silent. A few of the peanut gallery campers laughed as did Eddie and Sasha.

"Our first guest of the evening loves nature, treats trees as though they are people, once got lost in a corn field maze and has a habit of hugging trees, its Irene!" Said Sasha as Irene emerged out from backstage and waved to the crowd, her large ponytail waving from side to side as she walked.

Irene sat in the guest chair that the campers who were interviewed sat in and took out a few cookies from her pocket.

"Hey guys; care for a cookie?" Asked Irene.

"Why not; I always had a weakness for biscuits." Agreed Eddie as he and Sasha took a cookie each and took a bite; they looked pleased with the taste.

"These taste pretty good Irene; what flavor are they?" Asked Sasha curiously as she swallowed the last of the cookie.

"My own recipe I thought up; orange, pear and cocoa bean." Smiled Irene. "Like them?"

"Absolutely … though to be perfectly honest I like just about any type of cookie." Said Eddie.

"I'm more of a doughnut person." Admitted Sasha as she wiped stray crumbs of her lips.

"Can I have a cookie?" Asked Patch.

"Sure." Shrugged Irene as she tossed a cookie to Patch, he caught it between his teeth.

"Irene; you were the tenth person to be voted off Total Drama Letterz; how does it feel that you are no longer in the running for the money?" Asked Sasha.

"It's a bit of a bummer, a big disappointment even." Said Irene with a small sigh but retaining her smile. "But I got a distance into the competition and while I didn't even make the merge I at least wasn't voted off first or something."

"So; what would you have done with the million dollar prize if you had won?" Asked Eddie. "I suspect you'd buy a forest or something.

"Not quite … I'd buy a rainforest!" Smiled Irene at the thought. "I'd forbid any loggers or developers getting near it. Maybe I could live in a tree house as well."

"I once tried to build a tree house." Recalled Fifi. "But there are some things that are better left forgotten."

"I never tried building one." Said Carlton with a whimper. "I'm terrified of heights and I'm no good at woodshop, I'm scared of the chisels!"

"What a coward." Smirked Daisy.

"Oh for god's sakes, stop being such a cuddle rabbit." Said Zita with a frown.

"What's a cuddle rabbit?" Asked Patch blankly.

Silence.

"Next question; you hug trees right? Have you ever hugged a cactus?" Asked Eddie skeptically. "I'd assume no but you've hugged a lot of other trees and plants, so…"

"Well; I didn't have too much common sense when I was young so I'll have to answer in the affirmative. I came away a wiser girl, though it wasn't really that bad, it just stung a bit." Giggled Irene as she thought back to the first time she had tightly hugged a cactus … ouch.

"I don't see why you hug trees; they don't even have a brain … and they are completely bald. Bald … doesn't do it for me." Said Nakia idly as she brushed her hair.

"I wish you'd become bald." Muttered Yessica though Nakia didn't seem to hear her.

"This question may make you feel a little embarrassed, but did you have a crush on anyone during the time you were on the show?" Asked Sasha with a sly smirk.

Irene giggled in embarrassment and smiled.

"I can honestly say that nobody caught my eye; I didn't come here for a relationship anyway. I suppose if you loo at it from the physical angle some of the guys were hot, but I didn't really have any feelings for anyone, passing or real." Answered Irene truthfully and awkwardly.

"But I think we know someone here who grew _quite_ fond of someone else though." Smirked Fifi as she turned to look at a certain Japanese male behind her as did everyone else.

All Andy could do was blush in embarrassment and scratch his arm nervously.

"Ok; I like Mable, you can stop staring." Said Andy with an air of great embarrassment. "I was under the impression I'd already had my interview!"

"I'd have thought you'd have liked the screen time." Smirked Sasha. "Well; next question, why do you sleep with a tree plushie? Most people choose a teddy or a unicorn."

"Because I like trees." Said Irene simply. "If I was to somehow be reincarnated I would be a tree, probably a cherry blossom or an oak."

"I'd be a chocolate bar; then I'd taste so good." Smiled Patch as he belched again.

"Ok; one more question." Said Eddie. "Care to guess who was behind your elimination?"

Irene looked puzzled.

"Wait; someone was behind my elimination?" Asked Irene in confusion.

"Yes;' the same person who got Fifi, me and you eliminated." Said Hector as he crossed his arms. "Some who is a complete cut-throat she devil."

"Err … Uzuri?" Guessed Irene. "She could be an evil genius behind the whole childish and creepy attitude."

"Actually … it was Tabitha." Said Sasha with a frown. "She's quite a strategist; she has caused a fair number of eliminations so far to make sure she isn't the one voted off."

"I knew it!" Said Irene with narrowed eyes. "The trees told me there was a rat on the team, oh how I should have listened to them."

"I don't see how trees can speak when they clearly lack a mouth." Said Hector with a raised eyebrow.

"Maybe they communicate telepathically." Guessed Zita. "Though I'm no expert on biology."

"I can just 'hear' them." Said Irene vaguely. "But what good will telling me do now that I'm eliminated?"

"Well; maybe one or a few of us could return at some point. How I would like to take Tabitha down." Said Andy longingly. "I don't quite like the way she calls Uzuri a freak, its tactless and Uzuri seems so sweet."

"She was a little oddball but I didn't mind her." Agreed Yessica. "Though I didn't like her doll very much."

"Well Irene; you've got a few fans." Said Eddie as he took out a medium sized sack of letters. "Its time for the fan mail."

"Goody!" Smiled Irene. "I like the sound of that; hopefully I don't have any haters; haters don't go to heaven!"

"We'll just see about that." Chuckled Eddie as he took out a letter and opened it. "This one is from Quell. 'Irene; you are my favorite contestant, you really treat nature like it should be treated, like a person. Nature is more than the environment, it is everything. When you lost I felt like smacking Tabitha with a cactus. I hope you return to the competition at some point. Good luck if you do, and doom to Chris if you don't'. Well, that girl seemed pretty nice … though she also seemed a little nuts, what with the cactus thing."

"She sounded like she'd be a good friend." Smiled Irene. "Anymore letters?"

"Certainly, this one if from somebody who calls themselves Crazy Oink Moo the sixty third." Said Eddie with a raised eyebrow. "Dear Irene; It was so unfair how you lost; Tabitha is such a nasty piece of work, her confessionals are quite tactless. I wish you'd won; it would have certainly helped the earth and the environment. But there's always next time right? Nice letter; but I'm not sure about last time, this could be the last season as far as I know."

"I'd win the next season easily." Said Daisy smugly.

"Or you could be voted off first again." Smirked Fifi.

"Shut up!" Snapped Daisy.

"Actually Fifi has a valid point." Said Hector calmly. "You aren't very nice and you don't have any friends, I fail to see how you would get very far."

Daisy just glowered angrily as Eddie began to read another letter.

"This one is from … oh not again." Said Eddie with an annoyed sigh as he ripped up the letter. "Another weight watchers letter; I don't even know how it got there as Irene is anything but overweight."

"Thank you." Smiled Irene.

"Ok; the real next letter is from Brian." Said Eddie as he opened the next letter. "Dear Irene; what is your opinion on the sixties? You are all about protecting trees and nature so you would have been a good hippy. You could have made the sixties last into the seventies. Ok; the last part didn't exactly make sense, but still, what _did_ you think of the sixties?"

"They sounded mondo! Music, big crowds, caring about the environment and all for peace. It was great because when war stops trees live longer." Said Irene happily. "I'd have liked to see them."

"The sixties sounded fun." Said Andy. "Humanity first went to the moon in that decade."

"Everyone's going to the moon nowadays." Said Sasha as she put her hands on her knees. "Even Mario has gone there, though that was a video game, not reality."

"I'm not so interested in space; I guess that's because plants can't grow there." Shrugged Irene.

"This has been a great start to the show Irene; to be honest I'd have liked to see you go further, it was odd yet rather amusing to see you talk to trees." Said Eddie as he shook Irene's hand. "We have to move onto the second guest but you've gotten the gears spinning for tonight."

"Always a pleasure; keep it green you two." Smiled Irene as she got up and went over to sit by Andy.

"I guess we should move onto the next guest." Said Sasha with a skeptical look. "But he is a bit of a loon and his laughter is like an ear worm."

"Well; whether we like it or not we've got to interview each and every one of the twenty sic contestants; even Kasimar." Said Eddie in dread.

"Let's get this over with then." Sighed Sasha while putting on a forced smile. "He's evil as Bowser, dresses like Albert Wesker, he got a does of humiliation and he got betrayed by his henchman, give a round of applause, or boos if you prefer, to Wallace!"

Instantly some organ music began to play from nowhere; the audience booed and cheered while most people looked confused.

"I'll never know where he makes that music come from." Said Eddie blankly.

"I know this song." Said Sasha in recognition. "It's Organ Jaws from Epic Battle Fantasy 2."

"Curses; the secret is out." Said Wallace from backstage.

A moment later some smoke puffed up from by the guest chair and when it cleared Wallace was sitting down drinking a glass of orange juice with a curly straw.

"Where did you come from?" Asked Sasha in confusion. "You were backstage a moment ago."

"Tis a secret of the life of an evil villain like me." Smirked Wallace as he put his drink down on the arm of the chair. "Join the dark side and I might tell you … might."

"I'll have to politely turn down your, ahem, generous offer." Said Eddie as he rolled his eyes.

"Ditto." Said Sasha as she crossed her arms.

"Suit yourselves, and speaking off which my suit is simply despicable and diabolical. Mwahahahahaha!"

"Stupid evil much?" Whispered Sasha to Eddie. The teen detective chuckled in amusement.

"Ever since I was voted off the Island I've been in a _particularly_ evil mood." Cackled Wallace. "Anybody want to see my latest evil invention?"

"If we must." Said Andy with an amused sigh. "What 'evil'; and I use that term loosely, invention have you made this time?"

"Is it a hair comb that doubles as a hair dryer?" Asked Nakia hopefully.

"Nope … I present to you mortal fools … the jellyinator! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he took out a strange looking gun with a capsule of blue jelly attached to it; he pulled the trigger and a blast of the sticky, tasty and messy jelly splattered Daisy.

"Aaaaar! My cloths! You freak!" Wailed Daisy a she ran off stage leaving a drippy trail of jelly behind her.

"…Nice one." Said Zita in amusement at the bratty teachers pet's karma.

"Well; I am a bad guy." Smirked Wallace.

"So Wallace; you're pretty much an over the top villain, care to tell us why you chose that path in life?" Asked Eddie while not really expecting a sane response.

"That's an easy question; its fun! Mwuhahaha! You see; I was always a bad guy since the day I entered the battlefield of good and evil known as life. But I realized my true potential when people started to pick on me, I didn't like it, not … one … bit! I fought back and proved I was more evil than them! I was helped along by my mass of intellect and lack of morals."

"I agree with the last bit; you're a genius. A psychotic evil genius but a genius all the same."

"I like to think I'm smart but I admit you surpass me." Agreed Hector.

"Well I have made honor roll in every grade I've been in since I started attending school; I just wish the syllabus tested us on important things like how to build death traps or making volatile bombs, something I'm quite good at." Smirked Wallace as he pinched his moustache smugly.

"Where do you keep all those gadgets anyway?" Asked Sasha incredulously. "There is no way you can fit all that in a leather jacket!"

"That's classified information until you severe all ties to the light side and move into the dark side without looking back." Explained Wallace. "Mwahahahahahaha!"

"Can you turn that music off?" Whimpered Carlton fearfully as tears of fear exited his eyes. "It's so scary!"

"Fine." Said Wallace as he rolled his eyes and pressed a button on his remote to turn it off.

"Why did you do that?" Asked Yessica sounding a little bit confused. "I thought you were a bad guy; why not keep it on, isn't that more evil?"

"This thing runs on batteries you know." Hand waved Wallace impatiently. "I can't keep it on forever as much as I'd like to."

"That answers that then." Shrugged Yessica.

"So wallace; you were on the strongest team; you got to the tenth day during which time your team had only two ceremony's, do you think you could have gotten further if you'd been on another team?"

"Nah; I was content with my team; strength as a team over wimpy niceness." Said Wallace with a shrug. "Besides; as this season the votes are recorded I can't just switch the votes or anything like that unless for whatever reason Chris makes a ballot box again. If I could I would have done in a heart beat."

"I bet you'd have tried to get rid of Oscar and Xaria." Smirked Irene. "£They really gave you a, ahem, _taste_ of your own medicine … quite literally."

The audience burst into applause for Irene and laughter at Wallace. Wallace scowled and in an instant took out what looked like a bazookas.

"If you don't stop laughing I'll turnip-zooka you to Hades and back!" Roared Wallace as he cocked his bazooka.

The audience quickly stopped laughing and went silent.

"Much better. Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he stuffed the bazooka back into his leather jacket.

"I don't even think that's possible." Said Eddie. "I see no way that weapon could fit in your jacket."

"My evil jacket is … and evil bag of holding. I'm so evil I don't obey the laws of physics. Mwuhahahahaha!" Cackled Wallace.

"You cheated in every single challenge; would it kill you to play fair?" Asked Eddie with a frown.

"My family doctor says it just might." Said Wallace snarkly with a dry smirk. "When you're as big a bad guy as me you don't compete if you aren't going to cheat. It's like the time in the annual footrace of my elementary school when I left land mines, holes, laxative laced chocolate and catapults all over the course for my unlucky goody two shoes opposition to fall victim to. I won by a country mile. Mwuhahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he through his hands up and pressed a button on his remote; lightning struck outside and Carlton screamed in fear.

"Aaaaaah! I'm scared of lightning." Whimpered Carlton.

"Ok; I think we have just one more question to ask you." Said Sasha with a smirk. "What do you think of Kasimar betraying you? Are you proud your apprentice and right hand man screwed you over?"

Wallace scowled and his eyes behind his shades narrowed.

"I am … in one word, not. Evil is quite a delicate thing, you can hurt people, blow stuff up and upset innocents … but its all fun and evil until someone gets seriously hurt! I'm a cold blooded villain with a black soul and heart and even I wouldn't have broken Gary's legs and pushed Raven to a bear … Raven could have been killed! Its not that I care, but Kasimar takes things way past normal evil."

"Wait … you are actually disgusted at Kasimar?" Said Sasha with a look of surprise and amazement. "But you're a bad guy, you're evil, what the hell do you care about taking things to far?"

Wallace chuckled for a moment and relaxed.

"Well my naïve interviewer; there is a heck of a lot of difference between Dr, No and Hitler." Explained Wallace indifferently. "Karma struck me down and it will invariably strike Kasimar down as well."

"You have a moral compass as confusing as a company hotline." Said Fifi with a raised eyebrow.

"Is a hotline spicy?" Asked Patch as he belched.

"…No, it is not edible." Said Fifi in a deadpan voice.

"If there's one thing I've learned it's that people with bad hair tend to be really stupid." Smirked Nakia as she brushed her hair. "No wonder my team voted for me really."

"Oh; and the fact you are generally nasty had nothing to do with it?" Scoffed Andy.

"That's why I voted for you." Agreed Zita.

"Oh shut up split ends!" Snapped Nakia.

"Time for some fan mail." Said Sasha as she left the stage and dragged on a fairly large sack of letters. "Despite the fact you're a complete lunatic you seem to have a number of fans, it's kinda funny really, you didn't do much besides be evil."

"You just answered your own question." Smirked Wallace. "Mwuhahahahahaha!"

"Ok; the first letter is from The Todd, I think he sent a letter in the last episode." Said Sasha as she thought back a few days. "It says, 'Dear The Wallace, I am a big fan. You put the BAD in BADminton; you put EVIL in EVIL kineevil. You put a good word in for evil all over the world. Maybe one day we could meet up and knock down dominoes at the world record convention, they would be SO frustrated. Mwahahahaha! I wish you had won; but I'm sure you can cause mayhem and evil at the Playa and make people cry!"

Sasha stared at the letter and blinked.

"Is this guy your brother or something?" Asked Sasha with a groan.

"No … but he could be! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace. "I'll have to get in touch with this Todd person, he sounds diabolical! His evil suggestion seems so dark; why didn't I think of that?"

"This next letter is from Bob. 'Dear Wallace … you're evil' … that's it? Well, it was straight to the point and quite true as well."

"And it's exactly what I want to be known as. But I must clarify, I'm neutral evil, I'm not chaotic evil, those people are seriously batshit insane."

"That's … gonna have to be censored." Said Eddie disapprovingly. "Anymore letters to read?"

"Ok, letter number three, this one is … oh not him again." Groaned Sasha in exasperation. "This one is from, 'The Todd'. This time he rights; 'Wallace, how do you get your theme song music to come out of nowhere? I have to carry the speakers around with me. You can tell me, I'm completely evil already and I won't tell any wishy washy good guys that smell like cabbage! P.S Ducks are evil'. What a nutter."

"I'll have to get this guy's address; he could be a great evil pen pal." Cackled Wallace.

"You're gonna make friends with a pen?" Asked Patch dumbly. "I was quite chummy with a pencil once … but we weren't exactly _friends_."

"It means someone you right to and they write back." Said Hector in exasperation. "May I ask your grade point average?"

"A lovely round zero." Smiled Patch while hanging his tongue out.

"Dumbass." Muttered Nakia.

"That score doesn't surprise me too much." Said Eddie as he covered his face his with right hand.

"Time for one more letter, hopefully from somebody _sane_ this time." Said Sasha as she opened another letter. "Dear Wallace; you belong in an asylum, that way you'd be with your own kind and would laugh all day in a happy coat. From Willa."

"If it was Arkam Asylum I could scheme and plot with the joker! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he turned on his theme music again.

"Make it stop!" Screamed Carlton is terror.

"Well Wallace; we're going to have to move on now; we have another two guests who probably want to vent." Said Sasha. "So if you could take a seat next to Irene."

"Yes and no." Said Wallace as he got up and walked over to the peanut gallery chair. He then climbed up onto the empty top row and sat down. "I'm so evil I went to the top row instead of the middle row! Mwuhahahahaha!"

"No comment." Shrugged Sasha.

"Our next guest is a real iron chef, he gets angry easy, got beat up by Kasimar, fell in love with Raven and won the cooking challenge for his team; give a round of applause for Gary!"

Nobody came out from backstage. Eddie raised an eyebrow and cleared this throat.

"I said; give a round of applause for gary!" Said Eddie a little louder.

A moment after saying this Gary wheeled out from backstage on his wheel chair while the audience gave a loud applause. Rather than get out of his wheelchair to get into the guest chair Gary simply wheeled beside it and waved to the crowd before facing Eddie and Sasha.

"Hi guys." Greeted Gary. "Sorry I didn't hear you … I was a bit distracted."

"I think I can guess why you were _distracted_." Smirked Zita with finger quotations.

Gary just blushed as a few people either 'aaaawd' or laughed.

"Well Gary; are you ok?" Asked Eddie. "How long is it going to be before you get out of that wheelchair?"

"Only a couple of weeks, the Playa has good medical care, I suppose Chris was forced to provide that." Shrugged Gary before muttering. "Lousy cheapskate."

"I think Chris is really rigging the game." Said Sasha as she nervously thought back to how Gary was eliminated. "After what Kasimar did he should have been disqualified."

"The contracts are about as unfair as sideshow games in an amusement park." Sighed Gary. "I however am angrier about what Kasimar did to Raven; has he no heart? No soul? I have never disliked anyone so much and someday I _will_ have my revenge."

"If Kasimar wins I'll eat my hat." Said Eddie with folded arms. "And if he does then I made need some ketchup."

"Mmmmm, ketchup." Drooled Patch.

"So Gary; how would you describe your time on Wawanakwa?" Asked Sasha.

"It's hard to describe it in just one word … but if I had to then I'd call it variable." Said Gary as he began to recall his eleven days of competition time. "I made friends; I made enemies … big enemies. I had a lot of fun and at the same time I suffered greatly. But I also met a great girl; all in all it was an eventful experience. Though if I did it again I'd certainly have tried to sabotage Kasimar. I'm still wondering why he attacked me; he said he was requested to do it."

"That brings me onto the next question." Said Sasha while looking hesitant. "Would you like to know who put Kasimar up to that?"

"My first guess would have gone to Wallace but he was eliminated at that point." Said Gary as he frowned at Wallace.

"Hey; I wouldn't have done _that_to you." Said Wallace affronted. "But I know who it was even without seeing it due to it being edited craftily."

"Well tell me; who was it?" Asked Gary looking calculating.

"It." Began Sasha before Wallace interrupted her.

"It was the resident lawful evil bitch Tabitha; I don't know how nobody noticed how nasty she is … I mean, it's so painfully _obvious_." Said Wallace while adjusted his shades.

"What?" Said Gary looking stunned. "Tabitha was behind it? But … she seemed like a nice team player!"

"Well; looks like she hoodwinked you." Shrugged Wallace. "Let that horrible information sink in while I laugh manically. Mwuhahaha!"

"I don't believe this! Tabitha did that?" Said Gary as he snarled in anger. "I have been raised to never hit a girl … but Tabitha may be the only time I make an exception."

"You aren't the first person that weasel got voted off." Said Hector. "She did the same to me, Daisy, Fifi, Yessica and Irene. You just suffered a bit more because she didn't like that you had a relationship and she didn't know about it."

"Well; rest assured Tabitha could be exposed at anytime." Said Sasha wishfully. "But here's another question; who is the better cook? Jamie Oliver or Gordon Ramsey?"

"Tough question. They both have a lot of good points to them … but I'll have to go with Gordon Ramsey. He's a really good chef and sometimes I watch kitchen nightmares for some cheap amusement." Chuckled Gary.

"I guess Gordon Ramsey would be better because he has more experience; but Jamie Oliver really knows his way around the kitchen too." Agreed Eddie.

"I don't really care much for fine cuisine." Shrugged Zita from her place on the peanut gallery. "I'm more of a 'I taste it I like it' type of girl; I've got a widely varied taste."

"I love Chinese food." Said Andy with a smile. "But then again who doesn't?"

"Chinese food is gross!" Squicked Nakia in disgust. "It can really damage your physical appearance, too late for you I guess."

"Moving on; what did you think of your team mates?" Asked Eddie. "I'm guessing your opinion on Tabitha has changed quite a lot in the last few minutes right?"

"Too right; she's a devil. She's lucky she's good with her words or she'd have nothing. I predict a sticky end for her. Fifi I think I misjudged; I've already gotten to know her properly in the short time I've been here. Yessica's nice and I don't mind her at all. Hector's a good friend; I'm wishing Tabitha had left in the boat race and not him. Irene is a ton of fun; a little oddball but a great friend and team mate. Vinnie's a cool guy once you get to know him; he slips up in conversation every once in a while but he's got a good heart in there. I think he could end up going far." Listed Gary while his former teammates that were in the peanut gallery smiled.

"So what about Uzuri?" Asked Sasha. "She puts the odd into oddball … but in a good way."

"Uzuri is a lot of things. Some of those things are strange, kind, sadistic and funny. She may seem scary, weird and freaky from a first glance but if you really get to know her you'll see she's got a heart of gold. She was a good teammate indeed; I think her and Vinnie's relationship is really going to last." Smiled Gary.

"Awwwww." Giggled Irene. "I always did have a soft spot for lovey dovie stuff."

"A freak and a freak; yeah, that'll work." Said Daisy sarcastically as she walked back on stage without a trace of blue jelly.

"Oh shut up brat!" Snapped Zita as she reached up and grabbed Wallace's blue jelly gun of him and shot it at Daisy.

"AAAAAARGH!" Wailed Daisy as she ran off stage again while everyone in the studio began to laugh.

"No thanks necessary." Said Zita as she handed Wallace his gun back.

"I wonder if that's going to happen every episode." Thought Sasha aloud. "Well; one last question, do you love Raven?"

"What kind of a question is that? Of course I do." Said Gary with a raised eyebrow. "What kind of miserable excuse for a boyfriend would I be if I didn't?"

"Right answer." Chuckled Sasha. "Raven was one of my favorites so I was just making sure even if it was obvious you did."

"Fair enough." Smiled Gary.

"Time for everybody's favorite part of the show … the fan mail." Said Eddie as he took out a sizable sack of letters. "You seem to have a number of fans."

"That's good to know; I wonder what they'll have to say." Said Gary as he looked at the mail bag.

"Let's find out shall we?" Said Eddie as he opened the first letter. "This one is from Adrian. 'Dear Gary; why do you bother with cooking? With strength like that you have you could be a wrestler or a jock'. Well; here comes the answer."

"Because cooking is simply my hobby and I'm quite fond of it; besides, if I couldn't cook and I lived alone I might end up starving … not a nice way to go out to be honest." Explained Gary.

"Well, there you have it." Said Eddie as he took out another letter. "This one is from somebody called … Eew, someone called HornyHunk64. He says 'Gary; why doesn't MacDonald's serve hotdogs'? Funny; me and Sasha asked Zita that question as a joke last time. So; why Gary?"

"How should I know? I don't work at MacDonald's nor do I plan to. I think I could end up somewhere a _bit_ better than a fast food joint." Said Gary with an eye roll.

"I think we should move on from that letter and its, um, sender." Said Eddie as he hastily opened another letter. "This letter is from Branklin; he says 'Dear Gary; you're a great chef; Team Jungle was lucky to have you. Maybe you could cook for me instead of my mum sometime; her foods tastes like coal'. Well; what do you say Gary?"

"I doubt food can taste like coal, why would he eat coal anyway?" Asked Gary logically. "But sure; maybe I could if he doesn't live too far from me."

"Food tasting like coal does seem a bit odd." Said Sasha as Eddie opened another letter.

"Last letter; this one is from Mr. Hater. He says 'Dear Gary I hate you'. Hmm, touchy." Said Eddie with a frown as he tore up the letter.

"There is so much hate in the world." Said Gary bitterly. "Though _some_ things make it worthwhile."

Gary glanced backstage as he said this.

"Well Gary; we all wish you a speedy recovery and when Kasimar is voted off we'll join you in getting revenge." Smiled Sasha. "Could you wheel over to the others while we interview Raven?"

"Sure." Said Gary as he did so. "I hope Raven gets some good fan mail."

"We can only hope." Said Eddie.

"Our final guest of the night has seriously changed since day one." Announced Sasha. "She started out shy, hooked up with Gary, became open and social, got hurt by a bear as a result of Kasimar's cowardice and she had the last laugh by whacking the nasty bully on the noggin with her crutches; please give a warm welcome to Raven!"

Raven slowly entered stage on crutches as the audience loudly whistled and applauded her. Raven sat down on the guest chair and waved to the audience.

"Hey everyone." Smiled Raven. "This is a nice show; a good way to end this crazy day."

"Crazy is as crazy does." Cackled Wallace.

"Oh quiet you!" Snapped Raven. "I haven't forgiven you for trapping me in the hole and laughing at me!"

"Well even though I'm a villain I wouldn't have pushed you towards the bear. That was as inexcusable as making Diesel 10 a friggin good guy!" Said Wallace in angry remembrance.

"Whatever; I still don't like you too much." Said Raven before turning to Eddie and Sasha. "Hey guys; I don't believe I got your names earlier in the day; its Eddie and Sasha right?"

"That's me." Nodded Sasha. "I and Eddie auditioned to be on the show but we didn't get on. We however won a little raffle draw to host this show."

"So Raven; you lasted twelve days on the Island Hades known as Wawanakwa. That means you nearly got to the halfway point. How does it feel to have been voted off when the merge was getting close?" Asked Eddie sympathetically as he glanced at her cast.

"It felt quite gutted to lose the way I did; for a moment I really thought I was staying and Kasimar was going. But Chris once again tilted the game to keep Kasimar in." Said Raven with a sigh. "It's a shame; I could have really used that money, maybe I could have split it with Gary."

"Don't feel too bad Raven; you are probably going to be the only camper to be voted off without ever having a single vote cast against them. It shows how well liked you are."

Raven smiled in appreciation.

"Thanks Gary." Smiled Raven in a touched way.

"You were probably one of the most well liked campers; you didn't really make any enemies besides the two who have been nicknamed Winkus and Dinkus." Said Sasha with a giggle.

"Hey!" Said Wallace sounding offended.

"I could think of worse words to call you." Said Yessica.

"I just tried to be nice; though at first I was too shy to really talk to anyone unless I was spoken to." Said Raven to answer Sasha.

"So what caused you to change from the very moe girl you were at the beginning to the sweet, outdoing and plucky girl you are now?" Asked Sasha with interest as it was quite a big change in Raven's personality.

"I don't know; a number of things I guess." Said raven as she thought back to her time on the island. "I got used to the people around me, I learned how to socialize and stand up for myself … and in a way Kasimar helped because if he hadn't spoiled my books ending I wouldn't have gotten angry and lost all remaining shyness. But Gary undeniably played a big part in helping me open up."

"No problem sweetheart." Smiled Gary. "But after what that blue haired asshole has done I doubt you'll be thanking him right?"

"You know it hun; I'd like to at the very least teach him a lesson on behavior after what he's done to me and you." Said Raven as she glanced at her injured leg in the cast.

"Maybe one day you might get him back." Said Eddie positively. "What was your favorite challenge?"

"The Pikmin challenge because I hooked up with gary." Smiled Raven. "But at the other end of the scale is the Christmas challenge because I got stuck in a hole and my claustrophobia acted up badly indeed."

As she said this many people glared at Wallace.

"Hey, I am a bad guy." Smirked Wallace. "Its within my nature."

"Whatever 'Wesker'." Said Sasha as she rolled her eyes. "I must ask you raven; after what has happened, do you hate bears now?"

"I don't really hate them." Said Raven before shuddering. "But I think I'm a little scared of them now."

"Thankfully there is only one bear on that crazy island." Said Carlton fearfully. "I'm scared of bears, they're so scary!"

"I wonder if they'll ever send a bear into space." Pondered Andy.

"Who cares?" Said Nakia rudely as she continued brushing her hair.

"Can I borrow that gun to use on her?" Asked Andy to Wallace.

"Sorry; you don't have clearance; Zita only got it because she took me by surprise." Denied Wallace.

"You could really do a lot of goodness in the world with your intellect you know." Said Hector as he glanced at Wallace.

"Good is the bane of my existence." Gagged Wallace.

"You could at least try." Mumbled Irene.

"Out of all the campers who have been here thus far it seems Raven that you have gotten the most out of this show." Said Sasha as she picked up her DS and began to play the game again. "You're no longer shy, you've learned to stand up for yourself and you've got a boyfriend; do you agree?"

"To be honest Sasha … I'm glad I signed up for this show … though I think I've had quite enough Total Drama for a while." Giggled Raven with a plucky smile.

"Haven't we all." Said Fifi in complete agreement.

"I think before we sign off the show we should have a look at your fan mail." Said Sasha as she put her game down and pulled a fairly large sack of letters and mail from behind her chair.

"Wow; am I that popular?" Asked Raven in surprise.

"You were quite the likable protagonist." Said Eddie. "You're one of the most generally well liked people; the others in that roll are Barney, Uzuri and Spider."

"I really do not see how that split end city _germ_ can actually be liked." Scoffed Nakia shallow as always.

"He's a lot more likable than you; I didn't see too much of you on the show but I'm starting to really dislike you." Said Gary as he crossed his arms and glared at Nakia for a moment.

"Humph!" Said Nakia as she turned up her nose haughtily.

"The first letter is from Rebecca. 'Dear Raven; you're a nice girl; in fact … you're hot! Care to meet up sometime sweetie and cuddle?' Well; maybe she didn't know you were hooked up with Gary." Said Sasha in assessment at the blush of pure embarrassment on Raven's face.

"Errm … I like boys." Said Raven nervously while looking as red as a tomato. "I'm flattered … but I'm completely hetero … but thanks anyway … I think."

"She's with me; hands off." Joked Gary which got a few laughs from most of the peanut gallery.

"Ok *snrrrk* maybe the next latter *snigger* will be more to your liking." Laughed Sasha as she opened a second letter. "This one is from Chloe. 'Dear Raven; I feel so bad for how you got voted off! Kasimar is such a complete monster! I hope he gets tarred and feathered; I hope you have a great time at the Playa Des Losers with Gary. And maybe your game isn't over just yet; Chris could return a few people, maybe he'll bring you back so you can get even with Kasimar. I'll be rooting for you!' That was a nice letter; and I agree with her, Kasimar is a complete monster. I wonder what kind of parents raised him."

"Not very good ones." Said Raven while her blush from the previous letter faded. "But Chloe seems nice; maybe I could write her back."

"I think we have just enough time left in the episode for one more letter." Said Sasha as she reached into the sack and took out another letter. "This one is from somebody called TwilightSucks42; I like this person already. He or she says; 'To Raven, you're a great person! You actually read quality books instead of a readable turd like Twilight. Your relationship with Gary is sooooooooooo cutesy wootsy woo! Have a great summer and enjoy Kasimar's eventual downfall when it arrives. P.S I hate Twilight'. Well; I'd like to write this person back."

"That was a nice letter; but all that cutesy language is embarrassing me." Blushed Raven. "Still; I liked it though I've never read Twilight."

"Don't … just don't." Advised Andy.

"Shut up! Jacob is hot!" Smiled Nakia.

"I'm on team food! *Belch*!" Burped Patch noisily.

"And I think … that's all the time we have!" Said Eddie with a clap of his hands. "What an episode it has been eh? Daisy got covered in blue jelly twice, Raven has a female admirer, Wallace's theme music was recognized and we learnt more about our current peanut gallery."

"And that's not all; we also found a Twilight hating fan and learned Wallace cheated a lot in a race. I guess the slow and steady thing doesn't apply to him." Shrugged Sasha with a smile.

"Join us next time for more interviews with more voted off campers." Waved Eddie.

"And who knows, you might just learn something." Said Sasha with a wave a well.

"From me Eddie Lynmoire, goodnight!"

"And from me Sasha Tasset goodbye!"

"And see you next time!" Said Both Eddie and Sasha in usion.

"Aaaaaaand cut; good job you two." Said a camera man. "That was a good episode."

The audience started to disperse and the former campers began to leave to their rooms. Soon Gary and Raven were alone on the stage.

"So; what do you want to do now Ravy?" Asked Gary as he wheeled over to her.

"Maybe we could watch a movie in the TV room you told me about." Suggested Raven as she got up and balanced with her crutches. "I could get the staff to bring us some blankets and sleeping bags."

"What movie did you have in mind?" Asked Gary as they began to slowly leave the Total Ousted Alphabet filming room.

"I was thinking Despicable Me." Said Raven with a smile. "Its one of my favorites."

"Sounds good and a great way to end this _**long**_ day." Said Gary as he thought back to how worried and panicked he was when he saw Raven get hurt by the bear on TV earlier.

"And maybe … we could cuddle." Giggled Raven slyly.

Gary could only smile as his girlfriend carefully leaned in for a sweet tender kiss.

* * *

Awwwwww! Isn't that sweet? Looks like gary and raven are going to be JUST fine eh? And seriosuly, Despicable Me is a GREAT movie ... buy it!

Next time: It's the brunch of disgustingness all over again … oh gawd I'm gonna be sick!


	28. Day 13, Part 1, Not quite Gourmet food

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his increasingly awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own each and every one of the twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning: **The chapter contains some bullying, some love, a revelation to an arm related secret, toenails, moldy bread and yucky all round grossness. Nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender Jimmy Eleanor Andy Mable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note:** I am going through a slightly tough time at the moment. On the 14th April 2011 … my pet chicken passed away. Her name was Korma and she was a Red Star … less than a year old, about ten months. She was the most friendly, lovely and cuddly chicken you could ever find. She will be dearly missed. As such … the whole of day thirteen, the chapter I have been most looking forward to writing, is going to be dedicated in her loving memory. R.I.P Korma. And with that being said I hope you all enjoy this chapter of Total Drama Letterz.

Don't lose your lunch!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame late at night on Camp Wawanakwa; the moon was full and shone down on the waves of the ocean and reflected a mirror image of itself. There weren't many sounds; just the relaxing ripples of the water. All in all it was quite a peaceful night which is exactly what was needed after the day that had gone by.

Chris smirked for the camera and threw his arms up dramatically and struck a pose.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The magnificent and most handsome me decided to give the campers a small break from the daily torture and gave them … presents from home. That's right; most of the campers received a special something from their friends and family to help them endure while they put their lives on the line for the large cash prize. Some presents were typical like Jimmy getting a large selection of candy and sweets from his social group while others were interesting like Vinnie getting a pelt from his family … and some were disturbing like Kasimar receiving a selection of knocked out freshman teeth. But not all was well … but when I say that I mean it was bad for certain campers but funny for me! Haha!"

Chris cackled evilly for a moment and smirked sadistically.

"Xaria got a nasty letter from her jailbird abusive older sister which left her in tears. Uzuri on the other hand … received nothing! Looks like nobody cares about her enough to even bother sending her a gumball. Haha! Normally I would have just laughed and moved on … but this was a great opportunity for drama people, seriously! With a few well chosen and heart stabbing words from the wonderful and dashingly handsome me, Uzuri ran off in tears, haha, crybaby. But unfortunately Vinnie then punched me! What nerve!"

Chris muttered something about hiring a hit man before resuming his smile.

"The challenge was to wrangle an animal; a twist on a challenge from last season as this time it was done in teams. Team Jungle had to wrangle a horse; Team Puzzle had to bring in a Crocodile and much to my amusement Team Grenade were tasked to capture a bear. It was sure to be full of drama and as usual I was completely correct. I could have been a fortune teller if the pay was any good."

"The day went fine for Team Jungle more or less; Tabitha didn't have any problems with the challenge but the same couldn't be said for Vinnie and Uzuri. Uzuri had fallen into a depressed state of mind and believed nobody liked her. Vinnie was sad that his crush was upset and tried to cheer her up. He would have succeeded if I hadn't thankfully thwarted his attempt with my trusty intercom. The team, if you can call them that, located the horse and managed to ride it back to camp which netted them first place … something they have rarely achieved so far."

"Team Puzzle had it a little more difficult. Crocodiles are pretty aggressive creatures and aren't as easy to ride as horses. Spider was pretty afraid of the prospect of himself or any of his friends getting hurt. Quana comforted him though she was nervous herself … wimps. Thanks to Barney's strategic planning they were able to subdue the crocodile and attach the muzzle. That being done they carried it back to camp to earn second place."

"Team Grenade didn't have much luck with the bear. On the way there Kasimar upset everyone much to my amusement and his own. Eventually they came to the bear cave and an argument broke out thanks to Kasimar. The bear woke up and approached them. Kasimar wisely decided to leg in and pushed Raven to the bear to save his hide and to use as a distraction. Me and that guy are two of a kind. Oscar managed to knock out the bear and while he carried the furry animal Lavender, Mable and Xaria carried Raven back to camp. Once there they saw they came in last and were going to vote Kasimar off. But thanks to the well written contracts it was over ruled and Raven was automatically eliminated by default which bought the total amount of remaining campers down to thirteen."

"After Raven left Oscar saw Xaria alone on the beach and sat with her. He managed to cheer her up a bit and she told him about her unhappy past … lame! I would have just spat on her and laughed but Oscar, a muscular man, does the wussiest possible thing … he sang a song! After that he and Xaria hooked up. Super lame."

"Vinnie found Uzuri watching the sunset on top of the thousand foot cliff. He sat with her and after some conversation managed to cheer Uzuri up and show her people do care … by kissing her; does that weirdo have ANY taste? Well; nothing I can do about it sadly. The two hooked up and watched the sunset."

Chris face palmed and sighed before forcing a smile.

"Who will be the next camper to walk the dock of shame? How will the two new couples fare in the competition? Will anything big happen today? And also will anyone puke today? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

**(Team Grenade Girls)**

* * *

The atmosphere of the girl's side of the Team Grenade cabin was varied. On one hand they were quite sad that Raven was gone and that thanks to Chris they had missed a chance to boot Kasimar off the Island. But on the other hand they were happy, especially Xaria, as the former negative girl had hooked up with Oscar and for the first time in a long stretch of her life Xaria was truly happy, though she too was a bit sad Raven was gone.

"This bites." Grumbled Mable bitterly. "We could have got rid of Kasimar and probably prevented future misdeeds of his … but Chris points out a stupid loophole; I'm starting to wonder if this game is fixed."

"It can't be; there's no way Chris could accurately predict the result of every challenge with three teams participating. And even then we get to vote on who leaves … but he does seem to favor Kasimar." Said Lavender as she lay in her bed. "If only we had all ran from the bear instead of standing still; Kasimar wouldn't have pushed Raven and thus she would still be here."

"Well look at the bright side." Said Xaria nicely. "She's reunited with Gary now; I'm sure they'll enjoy the Playa Des Losers together."

"You do have a point." Agreed Lavender. "She kept her relationship a secret so Kasimar wouldn't hurt her and Gary … but he seems to have done so regardless."

"The world sometimes has a cruel sense of humor." Grumbled Mable. "But when you're feeling down it doesn't help to wear a frown."

"Speaking of which it looks like Xaria's frown has completely turned upside down. I guess love really is the ultimate medicine." Giggled Lavender genkily.

"I thought is was laughter." Replied Xaria though her smile stayed where it was.

"Same thing." Shrugged Lavender. "So … you and Oscar, Oscar and you huh?"

"Why ask? You two know already anyway." Blushed Xaria.

"Well; yes, we did see you two on the beach from the window." Admitted Mable while rubbing the back of her head nervously. "But what exactly happened, we couldn't hear what you were saying."

"Basically we just talked about stuff." Shrugged Xaria. "He cheered me up as I've told you."

"Yeah; how could Jaron do that to you?" Asked Lavender sympathetically. "Siblings are supposed to look out for each other through the thick and the thin."

"Its all in the past now." Shrugged Xaria. "And to be honest I feel glad I've told someone, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders."

"So what else did you talk about?" Asked Lavender.

"Oh you know; this … and that." Said Xaria with deliberate vagueness. "Basically we just compared interests and it turns out we have a fair amount of things in common."

"And to think that you two didn't get off to a great start eh?" Said Mable with a smile. "I guess time changed your attitudes."

"We just got used to each other." Smiled Xaria. "Maybe I'll tell you more later … on one condition."

"What's that?" Asked Lavender.

"You have to tell me all the details when you and Barney hook up." Smirked Xaria.

"I do _not_ like him like that!" Said Lavender with a blush as red as her hair and pajamas.

"Sure you don't." Smirked Mable. "And my hair isn't blue; we all know you fancy him, its nothing to be ashamed of you know."

"…Its just so embarrassing." Said Lavender with an embarrassed groan.

"You like who you like." Said Mable supportively. "I'd put money down on you two hooking up within three days."

"How do I always get myself into these messes?" Mumbled Lavender as she settled down and began to drift off to sleep as he mind began to think of Barney, though she quickly tried, and failed, to push the thoughts out.

* * *

**Confessional: FACT: You can't push a thought as it doesn't physically exist.**

**Lavender: I came to this god forsaken island to compete and win … not to fall in love. But now I'm wondering… **(Lavender looks conflicted).

**Mable: Its truly amazing what combinations of people are falling in love; a chef and a shy girl, a body builder and a former negative girl and now a pirate and a cheerleader. Chris should have called this season Total Drama Love Is Blind or something.**

**Xaria: I have a warm fuzzy feeling inside me and I don't know what it is … maybe its happiness. Thanks Oscar. **(Xaria smiles before looking concerned). **I wonder how Oscar is putting up with Kasimar.**

**Chris: Enough sappiness! I want fighting and bloodshed! **(Chris starts whining).

* * *

**(Team Grenade guys)**

* * *

Oscar lay on his bed with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. He rested his head on his muscular arms behind his head and felt content with his very memorable day.

Originally he had auditioned for Total Drama Letterz to win the prize, glory and to make sure people like Heather didn't do things like what had happened last season. But now he had found that special someone. It just went to show that you will most likely find love when you aren't looking. Oscar had promised Xaria that he would protect her from Jaron or anyone else who ever tried to hurt her. This made it likely he would end up in a fight with Kasimar but he felt he had a fairly decent chance against the bully. He had grown to understand why Xaria rarely smiled … but he felt that he had pierced through the negativity like a drill pierces through a piece of wood. Yep, it had been a good day.

"_I wonder what Xaria is doing now_?" Though Oscar to himself. "_Probably sleeping come to think of it_."

Oscar's good mood was going to be broken very quickly as just then Kasimar began speaking.

"What are you thinking about?" Asked Kasimar with a rather twisted and nasty grin. "Thinking about your bitch?"

"I would recommend for the safety of your health that you **do not** call Xaria a bitch." Said Oscar as his eyes remained closed his anger bubbled within him.

"Geez; touchy." Scoffed Kasimar with an eye roll. "Oh, I know what you're thinking about … you're imagining her boob's arnt'cha."

"I am not … now **shut up**.**" **Growled Oscar as his anger rose a bit more.

"It's perfectly natural to think of that you know; can't say I haven't thought that of a few girls here already." Smirked Kasimar. "Besides; Xaria's probably got A cups, if that."

"Do you have a problem?" Asked Oscar as he sat up with a frown on his face. "I don't like it when people insult my friends but I get _**REALLY**_ annoyed when people insult my girlfriend. You don't know what she's been through."

"Whatever; not like your little relationship is gonna last anyway." Said Kasimar idly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Asked Oscar gruffly.

"Well Mr. Steroid it means that once this show is over you may not see each other again; not only that but as soon as someone better comes along Xaria's going to dump you like garbage at a landfill. In fact; you'd be wise to do the same."

"I'm going to fall back on an old standard and say at least I actually _have_ a girlfriend." Shot back Oscar. "And another thing; the next time we lose you're gone, there's nobody as bad as you to get rid of and also nobody else will get an injury. Your fate was sealed when you pushed Raven to the bear."

"Oh are you still mad about that little thing?" Said Kasimar dryly in a bored tone.

"…Little thing!" Roared Oscar as he looked at Kasimar with hatred burning in his eyes. "You could have gotten Raven killed! You think what happened to Cody was bad? Raven could have ended up even worse! And yet you show no regret which shows just how much of a demon you are. You have NO redeeming qualities or niceness in you. How can you possibly think pushing Raven to a bear, running away like a coward and leaving us to save her while you feel no remorse is a little thing?"

"She was deadweight anyway. I don't think she's really done much for the team unlike me. You guys need me." Said Kasimar as he examined his hand idly.

"Oh _gee_; what did Raven ever do?" Said Oscar in false confusion and thought to mock his nemesis. "Let's see, she did very decently in the theme song challenge, she prepared a good scoring meal by herself … oh; and unlike you she faced her fear. You're the real coward on the team as you were the only one at that point who didn't face their fear!"

"Oh shut up … and I'm not a coward!" Snarled Kasimar.

"You have all the attitude of one; you're like a glass cannon, you can dish out a lot of power and damage, no doubt about it … but you can't take anything before you beg for mercy."

Kasimar's eye twitched and he glared at Oscar.

"A dagger in Xaria's ribcage." Spat Kasimar as he flipped Oscar off.

"Ok, its go time!" Yelled Oscar as he reached under his bed covers and took out the dumbbell he had received in the mail yesterday.

"Oh, you're going to work how, how intimid-" Began Kasimar before Oscar threw the dumbbell at Kasimar and knocked him out cold.

"Man that guy is a creep." Said Oscar as he took a few deep breaths to calm himself and lower his blood pressure. "Just keep calm Oscar; he'll be gone in a matter of time."

Oscar lay back down to sleep and as he did so thought of hid new girlfriend Xaria; yep, despite having to sleep in the same room as a complete sadistic sociopath he felt things were going to be fine for the rest of the competition.

* * *

**Confessional: Knockout! Score five points for the Oscar man! Woooooo!**

**Oscar: Kasimar is getting on my very **_**last**_** nerve. Our winning streak is officially over it seems … and if we lose again I hope I can punch his ugly face down the dock of shame and into the water.**

**Kasimar: Ow! My head! Oscar has some nerve; well, once the teams merge I'm sure Tabitha can help get rid of Oscar. I don't really have any loyalty as only one can win. Still; she can offer me money and I **_**like**_** money.**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle Guys)**

* * *

Spider and Barney were in their beds talking. Barney was telling Spider more on the ways of wooing ladies but Spider's mind seemed to be elsewhere. He had a look of great unease on his face.

"Something wrong me heartie? You look more worried than walrus in a walnut." Said Barney despite the saying making zero sense whatsoever.

"Well … I'm just *cough* a little afraid." Said Spider as he recalled what had happened earlier. "You saw what happened *cough* to Raven didn't you? Kasimar did *sneeze* that, the same person who broke Gary's *cough* legs. I don't even know if that was *cough* his worst. What if he *cough* comes after me next? And what if he *cough* hurts Quana? What if I fail to *cough* protect her and then she hates me?"

Spider looked wide eyed with worry and took a few deep breaths; this wouldn't be the first time he'd had a panic attack; every now and then he got really worked up and simply lost all sense of calmness.

"That's exactly it Spider; what if. An 'if' is simply a word; it doesn't mean it will happen savvy? And you've got me, Quana and everyone else to protect you. And I'm sure Quana can handle herself, she's a tough girl."

"Another reason *cough* I love her." Said Spider with a slight smile. "I just wish I *cough* wasn't so nervous about my *cough* feelings."

"There's no need to be me heartie." Smiled Barney before turning temporarily serious. "Love is simply what you make of it; I make it to be special and a wonderful bond that conjoins two souls who love each other for all eternity until they enter the gates of paradise … hopefully the paradise will have doughnuts and fish shaped cookies!"

"You're one of a *cough* kind Barney." Chuckled Spider.

"You're welcome. Now; it is time for your final love lesson." Began Barney before he was interrupted.

"Love lesson?" Asked Jimmy as he entered the cabin after coming back from the bathroom. "Do you like someone Spider? And why didn't you tell me?"

Spider blushed and groaned in embarrassment while Barney just chuckled.

"Well me wee cabin boy; Spider here is head over heels over head again for our teammate Quana and I have been teaching him how to get with her." Explained Barney proudly.

"Why can't Spider just tell Quana he loves her?" Asked Jimmy.

"She didn't know him well enough when I began teaching him back on day six; but now after a week of teaching and dating tips it all comes down to my final lesson I can possibly teach Spider."

"What's *cough* that?" Asked Spider half nervously and half eagerly.

"The most important thing of all, it is so important that without it all of the other lessons would be meaningless … tell her how you feel about her." Spoke Barney softly.

"What? I don't know *cough* if I can do that; I'll get *cough* cold feet and chicken out!" Gulped Spider. "And what if *cough* she rejects me?"

"I don't think she will." Said Jimmy supportively before Barney could speak. "You've been nothing but nice to Quana and she's been nothing but nice to you. I think you two are a match made in heaven. If I know anything its that good people always get a happy ending … or at least they should. But listen' I may only be ten but I know one thing … if you're already great friends then why not take it further? Heck; she hugged you in the cooking challenge right?"

There was a moment of impressed silence at what Jimmy had said. Barney began clapping and grinned.

"Atta boy Jimmy; you're bang on. I swear you could be a prodigy." Smiled Barney.

"I'm not; I'm just a little above average." Shrugged Jimmy. "But I know a boy called Rodney who is a true prodigy, he would have done well on this show."

"You guys are *cough* right; why should I *cough* worry?" Asked Spider as his smile grew and his heart began to beat faster. "I'll tell her tomorrow *sneeze* when the time is right."

"So why didn't you guys tell me or Andy?" Asked jimmy.

"Andy already knew cabin boy." Said Barney apologetically. "I didn't tell you because Spider and me swash buckling self didn't want you telling Quana before I was done teaching my protégé … sorry."

"No problem; I understand." Shrugged Jimmy as he climbed into his bed. "I promise to not tell her."

* * *

**Confessional: I won't tell either!**

**Barney: And so the teacher tells all to the student, the student becomes the master, the student wins the girls heart and I get to eat a taco. Everybody's a winner! Yohohohohohohoho!**

**Spider: I feel somewhat lightheaded and ***cough* **love struck; I know my feelings ***sneeze* **are genuine … but will ***sneeze* **Quana feel the same way … I don't ***big sneeze* **think I could take rejection.**

**Jimmy: Boy; Spider is as love struck for Quana as Scruff was for princess … that last bit was from a cartoon. Well; I wish him the best of luck.**

* * *

**(Team Puzzle Girls)**

* * *

Quana and Eleanor were in their pajama's (purple with yellow music notes for Quana and a leafy forest pattern for Eleanor) and were both in their beds talking with each other.

"Only thirteen of us are left now that Raven is gone." Said Eleanor as she lay in her bed stroking Frost and Dandelion in their cage within one hand. "Do you know what that means?"

"That half of us are gone; we've reached the halfway point." Nodded Quana in understanding. "That means the merge is on the close horizon. Hopefully Kasimar is going to get voted off soon. After what he's done to Raven and Gary … I just hope he gets his Karma."

"like Scar in The Lion King?" Asked Eleanor.

"Exactly." Said Quana as she lay her head on the fluffy pillows on her bed; since Zita and Nakia were gone both the two remaining girls now had an extra pillow each. "Though I doubt he's going to be eaten by hyenas. Still; I find it really unsettling and creepy that he's lusting after me. I'm more than just an object."

"Completely true; I'm sure you'll find the right guy someday … maybe sooner." Said Eleanor with a wink.

"Well … yeah." Blushed Quana as she thought of Spider. "Spider just seems to be the perfect guy. He's kind hearted, he tries to stand up to bullies, he's smart, he's handsome, he looks cute when he's nervous … gosh I sound obsessed."

"Just because you like him doesn't mean you're obsessed." Said Eleanor nicely. "He could be the one you are truly destined for."

"You really think so?" Asked Quana with a twinkle in her eyes.

"I'd say so; you're both really good friends so why not take it a little further?" Suggested Eleanor.

"How would I go about doing that?" Asked Quana as she felt her heart heat up. "I'm no expert at love; quite the opposite in fact."

"Simple … tell him how you feel silly!" Giggled Eleanor.

"But … I don't know if I can do that." Said Quana nervously. "First off he probably doesn't feel the same way and second … I don't really know how to tell him."

"Oh don't worry; love always finds a way." Smiled Eleanor. "Maybe you and Spider could form a duo alliance after the merge."

"If we're both still here." Pointed out Quana.

"I think you both will be; you're both very valuable members of the team … and; we may not see another Bonfire Ceremony before the merge, it's been days since our last one."

"Speaking of which, I wonder how Andy is doing. His arm was in pretty bad shape when he left." Said Quana in concern for her voted off friend.

"Hopefully he's ok; and he has a high tolerance to pain too. I'd say he'll be o-kuzay." Said Eleanor positively.

"What do you think then next challenge will be?" Asked Quana. "After today's animal wrangling I'm not holding out too much hope for a safe challenge."

"Perhaps it'll be something easy for a change … like making a signal fire maybe; it's certainly better than catching an alligator." Said Eleanor while tapping her chin in thought.

"Here's hoping." Agreed Quana. "You know how much I like the simple life."

"Nothing like getting back to basics." Mumbled Eleanor as she pulled the covers over her and lay down to sleep.

Quana lay back and closed her eyes as she began to settle down. As she drifted off into the land of dreams and out of the waking world an image of her and Spider kissing entered her head. He quickly thought of something else while blushing just a little.

* * *

**Confessional: The Singer and the Spider; it's just like an old Disney film in the golden age of animated movies.**

**Eleanor: It's the halfway point and a lot of stuff has happened. Most specifically is that I'm helping a sixteen year old with love when I'm only twelve. Well; it's my job as a friend to be supportive I guess. Aside from that … halfway point! Just twelve more campers to beat … unless Chris returns some of them. But I think it'll all be ok.**

**Quana: It's kind of funny really; I've fallen for one of my best friends on an island game show while competing for a million. I didn't see that coming. I came here to win some money; now I'm hoping to win something else. Though if Spider and me did hook up I don't think Kasimar would be very happy … he could go berserk on us. Well; he has no allies or friends so he should be gone pretty soon. The merge is coming soon and from then on the challenges are going to get harder as our sanity as well as Chris's continues to dwindle.**

* * *

**(Team Jungle Guy and his girlfriend)**

* * *

Vinnie and Uzuri were lying on Vinnie's bed watching a film Uzuri had bought; A Nightmare On Elm Street. The sounds of screams came from the wireless portable DVD player Uzuri had bought with her. Part of Vinnie was a little freaked out while the other part was quite content and happy.

True to her word Uzuri did get cuddly during a horror movie; for the first time ever Uzuri wasn't paying much attention to the scary movie and was instead more focused on snuggling up to Vinnie which he didn't mind at all.

"This is nice isn't it Vinnie." Smiled Uzuri in her returned cheerful voice. "Just the two of us snuggling up watching a decent scary movie; what could be better?"

"Maybe some popcorn?" Guessed Vinnie.

"It was a rhetorical question." Giggled Uzuri as she gave Vinnie a peck on the cheek. "But you're right; I could go for some toffee and caramel popcorn right about now … though I doubt Mr. Creep is going to bring us any."

"Mr. Creep is Chris right?" Asked Vinnie.

"You know it. Why does he hate me so much?" Asked Uzuri as she sighed a little.

"I don't know; but he's the type of person who has an over the top opinion of himself; maybe he's just jealous of you so tries to make you feel little so he will feel big." Said Vinnie as he wrapped his organic arm around his girlfriend.

"You're right; he's a nasty split artery!" Pouted Uzuri before her smile returned. "But it doesn't matter; that bastard is going to pay! Teehee!"

"I sure hope so." Smiled Vinnie. "Though we don't want him to die; if we were responsible we could get sued and put in jail; we definitely don't want that."

"Or do we…" Pondered Uzuri for a few seconds. "You're right, we don't."

The sounds from the movie stopped as the movie had ended. Uzuri stretched and yawned as she lay back on the pillows.

"Boy I feel really sleepy after this emotional roller coaster of a day." Smiled Uzuri. "Nothing like a horror movie to get you to go to sleep."

"I'm not so sure; that movie was kind of creepy and I feel more wide awake." Murmured Vinnie. "But I'll take your word for it."

"So; what did you think of the movie?" Asked Uzuri curiously.

"It was really interesting; completely creepy and kinda scary … but I think I liked it." Smiled Vinnie

"Yay!" Cheered Uzuri quietly as the two short lovers lay down on opposite sides of the bed.

As they lay in silence for a moment a question entered Uzuri's mind that she really wanted to know the answer to.

"Hey Vinnie; can I ask you a question?" Asked Uzuri.

"Sure Uzuri; what is it?" Replied Vinnie.

"How did you get your metal arm?" Asked Uzuri with innocent curiosity. "I don't think you've told anyone yet and you said it involved Easter eggs. I know its like a secret of yours but I'm your girlfriend and I'd kind of like to know."

Vinnie knew this moment was going to arrive; it was here now and as Uzuri was his girlfriend he decided to tell her. Vinnie took a deep breath and began explaining.

"Ok Uzuri … I'll tell you." Said Vinnie as he prepared to explain the story of how he lost his right arm. "Just don't tell Kasimar ok."

"You have my solemn word handsome." Saluted Uzuri with a giggle

"Ok then; I've never told anyone this in a long time, only my closest friends know … so therefore you should now know as well. You see; it goes back to when I was eight years old on the day I participated in the school's annual Easter egg hunt." Began Vinnie as he started to tell his secret.

* * *

_It was a warm spring day in a small Canadian town called seashell cove. As one might expect from the name it was located by the sea. It was mid April and on this sunny day the local elementary school Pear tree Elementary were having the annual Easter egg hunt._

"_Ok children; you have one hour to hunt for as many eggs as you can_." Said the teacher to the group of students. "_Once the time is up I will sound an air horn and you will all come back here so we can see who has collected the most_._ Ok; ready … set … go_!"

_The children, with their egg baskets in hand, ran off around the park to look for the colorful and chocolaty Easter eggs. A younger Vinnie was soon away from the other kids looking around the entrance to the park. He knew Easter eggs were egg shaped and colorful and had easily spotted and collected a few so far._

_The park was located in the middle of the town at the base of a rising road on a hill. At the top of the road the local army group were playing war games; it was all protocol and safe as the civilians had been alerted to this before hand so the area was clear. As the soldiers milled about a truck carrying a supply of grenades for delivery to their encampment just out of town was driving by. It had passed all inspection on the way and was deemed safe; the driver was careful and only something like a big crash could make any of the grenades cause potential harm._

_It just so happened at that moment further up the hill that a paint truck carrying buckets with various colors of paint in them. It had to make a delivery to the local art studio and intended to get there on time. Just up ahead of it a worker at a gas station was hauling a very heavy barrel of fuel to the sale area. But the weight seemed to be too much for the worked and he dropped the barrel; as it did so a fair amount of the fuel split and flowed onto the road._

"_Oh crap!" Yelled the worker._

_A moment later the paint truck drove speedily by; its tires drove through the fuel and it began to skid. The driver tried to break but it was going too fast to completely slow down; the paint truck crashed into the army truck delivering grenades with a mighty slam. Several of the grenades were knocked out; by coincidence come of them got covered in paint which to the naked eye make them resemble Easter eggs. A few of them rocketed down the hill and one happened to end up in the park near Vinnie._

"_Cool; another Easter egg." Smiled Vinnie as he picked up the now pinless painted grenade and examined it._

"_Wait; this one feels different, I don't think this is an egg." Said Vinnie as he looked at the grenade._

_BOOM_

_The grenade exploded in Vinnie's hand and blasted him off his feet and into a heap on the ground. The last words he heard before blacking out were the teacher yelling_, "_Call an ambulance!_"

* * *

"And the rest, so most people say, is history." Said Vinnie as he finished telling Uzuri the reason behind his metal arm. "I lost my arm thanks to the explosion and I was pretty injured all over; the doctor said I was lucky to be alive. The army took responsibility and paid for my metal arm. Its cool to have one but I'd much prefer my original one. Well; now you know why I am called 'the guy with a metal arm'. People bullied me for it … but that's life I guess. Its also why I'm afraid of Easter eggs … it might be another grenade and I could actually die next time."

Uzuri was speechless; Vinnie had narrowly escaped death that day. And he had lost his arm. That was horrible; and Uzuri had never had any friends so that was horrible too, but this was even worse!

"Oh my goodness." Gaped Uzuri. "You poor little guy; that's awful."

"I know; I became a bit of a hermit for a while … but as of today I have one hundred percent recovered." Said Vinnie with a sudden smile.

"Really; how?" Asked Uzuri.

"Because I've got you." Said Vinnie as both he and Uzuri hugged for a moment; Uzuri smiled before both of them lay down to go to sleep.

A few minutes rolled by and Vinnie heard a soft and somewhat cute mild snoring; he looked at his girlfriend and saw Uzuri had nodded off to sleep. Vinnie smiled to himself and closed his eyes.

* * *

**Confessional: I want a girlfrie****nd! Waaaaah! Boo hoo! I'm lonely!**

**Uzuri: I had a great nights sleep; I had such a wonderful nightmare … funnily enough nightmares don't scare me at all. I like Vinnie; he loves me despite my many differences and my oddball attitude. I like this happy feeling; it feels like a marshmallow. Teehee!**

**Vinnie: I feel like a huge weight has been lifted now that I've told someone about why I have a metal arm. I guess I just didn't think I knew the others well enough to tell them; well, not anymore. I had such a good sleep, I feel ready for the next challenge.**

* * *

**(Tabitha)**

* * *

Tabitha was alone in the girls side of the Team Jungle cabin; Uzuri and Vinnie were both sleeping in the boy's side to have some private time being that they had just hooked up. All in all things hadn't ended up so badly for Tabitha.

Tabitha looked over her sheet of paper with the faces of the other contestants and drew a red cross over Raven's picture. She chuckled to herself as she folded up the paper and put it under her pillow.

"Its been a good day. We came first and those creature comforts DVDs sound enjoyable. Kasimar is going to be a useful ally in the future." Said Tabitha to herself quietly. "Everyone on my team is loyal, Kasimar is on my side and nobody suspects a thing. And with Uzuri happy again I think its safe to say we'll be winning a bit more in the future."

Tabitha lay back on her pillows and looked up at the underneath of the empty top bunk and began to think.

"After what Kasimar did to Raven his team are going to want to get rid of him pronto, not good for me in the long run. And as my team has a mere three members left I can't let us lose. That means I have to make sure that Team Puzzle loses no matter what."

"Barney seems to be the biggest threat; he's their leader and has near infinite energy. Quana is a distant second; she's smart and well liked. Jimmy and Eleanor aren't much of a threat; they're just kids and probably won't last too long after the merge. Then there is Spider … it's impressive he's lasted this long but I doubt he'll get much further. He's no threat yet he's pretty well liked … but I can get rid of him when it is most necessary and convenient."

Tabitha pulled the covers up and got comfy.

"Talking to myself is becoming a habit I should quit; someone could over hear me … I guess I should strategize in the confessional just to be safe. I wonder who I should eliminate next."

Tabitha thought for a moment and shrugged to herself as she closed her eyes.

"Meh; I'll sleep on it."

* * *

**Confessional: I'll sleep on the ground as Chris is too cheap to get me a bed. Cheapskate.**

**Tabitha: The merge is getting closer, I can tell. I knew I'd get this far pretty easily and its actually been kind of fun. Still; if any campers return it may harem my chances a little … well; its like daddy always said to me when I was younger; "every problem can be solved through cruel blackmail"; harsh … but effective nonetheless.**

**Chris: Now there is a girl who uses her brain; I wonder how she'll do when some campers return … I mean, no campers are returning because once you walk the dock of shame you can never ever come back ever! … Xaria sucks!**

* * *

The following morning the thirteen campers were in the mess hall sitting at their team tables … though Team Grenade was sitting a distance away from Kasimar as quite understandably they wanted nothing to do with him. It was certain that now half of the contestants were gone the merge was just on the horizon. The campers were feeling pretty good about getting as far as they had so far.

"This is pretty good; its day thirteen and the merge is getting close. Am I right to feel good about that?" Asked Mable as she sat with her team waiting for breakfast.

"Absolutely." Confirmed Lavender as she tapped her fingers in a slow rhythm on the table. "We're halfway to the end; though when it comes down to it only one of us can win … and that's gonna be me."

"Dream on Red; I'm taking home the prize." Smirked Oscar while sitting next to Xaria. "Though I think splitting the money with Xaria would be a good sign of sportsmanship."

"What a good sport." Smiled Xaria as she leant against Oscar and in return Oscar put a strong arm around Xaria.

"I like this new side of you Xaria; it's like you've evolved into a better form, like a Pokémon." Said Mable as she glanced towards the kitchen. "I wonder when breakfast will be ready. It may not be brilliant but it's a bit better than the beginning thanks to Gary."

"But then Kasimar crossed the moral line and sent him off the island in a wheelchair … and I have a feeling he isn't going to be the last, or at least he won't be if Kasimar stays for much longer." Said Lavender as she glanced briefly at the sexist, violent bully.

Kasimar looked up and casually flipped Lavender off; Lavender frowned and turned back to the others.

"The merge is approaching but until then we have to work together and if we lose we must waste no time in voting Kasimar off." Finished Lavender.

"He mighty do to any of us what he did to Gary." Gulped Xaria.

"Don't worry; I'll protect you." Smiled Oscar warmly as Xaria wrapped an arm around him in response. "The same goes for all of you; we're a team and nobody but Kasimar gets left behind."

"I heard that." Scowled Kasimar from his seat. "Oh how I do very much want you to get brain cancer."

Kasimar's statement earned the bully a hard apple to the face. Mable smirked at her direct hit.

"I always carry an apple with me in case I get hungry; be prepared right?" Shrugged Mable as she laid her head on the table.

* * *

**Confessional: Be prepared, be prepared; this lesson must be shared!**

**Lavender: Nice shot Mable; but maybe squirting some mustard would have been better; it really stings the eyes apparently.**

**Mable: I'm pretty good at throwing things; I guess it comes from learning at a school that has at least two food fights a month … apples really do bop the noggin quite hard.**

* * *

Team Puzzle were waiting for breakfast to be served; it wasn't gourmet standard by any means but it was a lot better than going hungry. Spider and Quana were sitting next to each other and every now and then Spider would briefly glance at the girl he loved. Quana never caught him glancing so remained unaware of this. Barney was fidgeting in his seat which Jimmy noticed.

"Hey Barney, you look like you've got a terrible itch … have you got ants in your pants or something?" Asked Jimmy curiously.

"It's not that me heartie; I'm like the seas, oceans and waves, I cannot sit still. Yaaaaar; I kinda have ADHD, I just can't sit still for too long or I get fidgety and booooored!" Explained Barney as he rocked from side to side.

"You know … that actually explains a lot." Said Eleanor from her seat next to Jimmy. "Particularly why you're so bouncy all the time."

"Yep; I'm like a human spring." Grinned Barney. "Now were be me breakfast? I'm hungry as a starving shark of the waves."

"Good point; shouldn't Chef Hatchet have made breakfast by now?" Said Quana as she rested her head in her hand with her elbow on the table. "I'm not too hungry but breakfast is the most important meal of the day … maybe the challenge is a starvathon."

"Oh no; that sounds *cough* dreadful." Groaned Spider. "If that's the challenge *cough* I'll definitely lose; it could *sneeze* last several days."

"If that's the case then a starvathon probably won't be the challenge; it's a challenge per day this season." Said Eleanor as she straightened her turtle hat and blew a bang of her hair from her face. "And I think Chris could be sued if he did something like that; you can't legally starve someone; in fact, you shouldn't do it illegally either."

"My words exactly." Agreed Jimmy.

"I wonder what'll happen today; I don't know why but I feel something big is on its way. I hope its Kasimar being voted off." Said Quana hopefully.

"He's nasty *cough* isn't he?" Nodded Spider with a sniffle. "I don't like how he treats you."

"Me neither; he's sexist, he's a pervert, he beats people up and he smacked my tooshy twice." Grumbled Quana. "But he'll be gone soon enough."

"I really *cough* hope so." Said Spider while shivering a little as he glanced at Kasimar; for a moment Kasimar looked up and locked eyes with Spider. He smirked evilly; Spider let out a fearful noise as he wrung his hands nervously.

"You ok me heartie?" Asked Barney.

"No … Kasimar just *cough* looked at me evilly." Said Spider quietly. "I think he might hurt me."

"We'll protect you; I promise." Said Quana sweetly.

"And if he does hurt you we'll castrate him, right guys?" grinned Barney.

He was met with a silence and a few odd glances.

"Just a suggestion." Shrugged Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: I suggest that you start confessing!**

**Barney: It seems me heartie Spider is fearing his own personal safety; he's frightened Nakia will come back and also fears Kasimar the meredemon wants to run him through with his trident … err … fists. Well; it seems that he has never learned how to defend himself from his oppressors. Maybe I could teach him to fight sometime; it'll be like the hobo teaching Jimmy all over again! Yohohohohoho! **

**Spider: I would have tried to** *cough*** tell Quana I love her then but ***cough*** Barney's comment kind of ruined** *cough*** the moment. **(Spider sighs and looks determined). **When the time is ***cough* **right.**

**Quana: Maybe I should have told Spider my feelings then; Barney threw away the seriousness of the moment … but he's genki, what are you gonna do? **(Quana laughs and smiles). **Spider used the confessional a minute ago … I wonder what he said. I'd ask but confessional are supposed to be private. Oh well.**

* * *

Tabitha, Vinnie and Uzuri were sitting around the Team Jungle table. Like the jungle itself their team was disappearing. Only three of them were left so it was absolutely necessary to avoid elimination from now on. Tabitha sat on one side of the table thinking while on the opposite side Vinnie and Uzuri sat next to each other, the latter was snuggling up to the former.

"Well guys; its day thirteen and we're still here. We may have lost Fifi, Yessica, Hector, Irene and Gary on the way but hopefully we can avenge their vote offs by winning all the challenges until the merge." Said Tabitha. "And I must say; you two look quite comfy."

"What can I say; I'm a cuddle bug!" Giggled Uzuri.

"And I'm not complaining." Chuckled Vinnie.

* * *

**Confessional: I complain about a lot of things but we have a limited time slot.**

**Tabitha: I'm worried about the future if people like Vinnie and Uzuri are hooking up. Maybe in the future the world will be full of one metal armed creepy sadist freaks. That would be … a complete and utter disaster.**

* * *

"What do you guys think the challenge will be?" Asked Uzuri. "Maybe Chris will hang us upside down and see who can last the longest before the blood rushing to our heads makes us faint."

"Err … maybe he'll just make us have a go kart race or something." Said Tabitha after a moment of disturbed silence.

"I'd guess something to make us puke; I don't think he's happy with the lack of sickness and suffering so far." Said Vinnie before continuing. "I wonder how Spider gets on in life; what a strong willed guy."

"Maybe he's used to it." Guessed Uzuri. "But no matter what the challenge today is I'm sure we'll have fun. Our team is almost custom made for me; my best friend and my boyfriend."

"It'll be even better if we all get to the merge." Said Tabitha before faking a sigh. "But seeing that we have the fewest members and both of the other teams have slightly physically stronger members I'm not sure we can pull it off."

"Don't worry Tabitha; you just gotta belieeeeeve!" Giggled Uzuri.

"I believe that I can see the devil himself arriving." Said Vinnie as Chris entered the mess hall.

* * *

**Confessional: The devil in disguise; Elvis!**

**Tabitha: Chris isn't the devil … he's the ruler of furnace, the place below hell. Current population … zero; soon to be two once Chris and Kasimar move on.**

**Uzuri: **(She has a creepy expression).** Apparently the devil has five heads … hydra style; cooooool! **(Uzuri giggles).

**Vinnie: What can I say; I don't like Chris. He was so prejudice against Uzuri and he's a completely self absorbed jerkass. Still … he could be worse. I wish we had a new host … maybe Jack Black? He was epic in School of Rock!**

* * *

"Goooooood morning campers!" Announced Chris as he walked to the front of the mess hall where he could get everyone's attention. "Did you have a good sleep? I'm hoping you didn't! Haha!"

"Bite me Chris." Said Mable with a frown.

"Touchy. Well; only thirteen of you losers are left … but in the end one of you will be less of a loser than the other twenty five. Now; have you had a good breakfast?" Asked Chris with a smug grin.

"We haven't had any breakfast; Chef hasn't served us anything yet." Said Jimmy from his chair.

"Oh yeah; that's right." Chuckled Chris. "Well, breakfast is going to have to wait because its time for your thirteenth challenge, possible the most hard one yet."

"But we should have breakfast first Chris." Said Jimmy logically. "We're hungry and a healthy mind is a healthy body which we'll need for the challenge."

"Shut up runt." Said Chris rudely. "I don't care. Anyway; this challenge is going to test your constitution and ability to keep food down."

"Oh no." Said Lavender with a groan. "Please don't tell me its an eating challenge."

"Nope." Said Chris with a smirk.

"Then what is it?" Asked Lavender.

"… Its an eating challenge! Psyche! Haha!" Laughed Chris at his cruel joke. "This challenge is going to have three main factors. Gross food, vomit and upset stomachs! But as long as its not me who suffers its all good. Haha!"

"You love the sound of screaming don't you?" Asked Oscar dryly.

"I sure do." Laughed Chris. "But enough interruptions; its time to explain the rules of the challenge."

"What special rules could there be?" Asked Xaria snarkly. "You eat until you're sick; that's all there is too it."

"Shut up!" Whined Chris while stamping his feet like a toddler. "There are to some special rules!"

"Well; lets here them." Replied Xaria dryly.

Chris eye twitched.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no eyes to twitch. Why does everything look dark?**

**Chris: **(He looks really pissed off). **Why can't they shut their mouths and let me speak! I'm better than them, I deserve the screen time! **(Chris starts crying).

**Xaria: Seeing Chris cry really makes my day; well, that and Oscar hugging me … wow, I never used to say stuff like that, what's happening to me? **(Xaria chuckles).

* * *

"Look; let me explain or I'll kick you all off right now!" Screamed Chris in fury. "Do not go to Bonfire Ceremony, do not get marshmallow, and do walk Dock of Shame in humiliation!"

Everyone quieted down with the threat of instant elimination present but a few campers smirked at Chris's temper tantrum.

"Ok; now that we've got quiet I'll explain how this challenge works." Said Chris as he took a few deep breaths. "You remember the Brunch of Disgustingness last season right? You know; with all the vomit, dolphin hotdogs and more vomit, right?"

"How could we forget?" Asked Quana dully. "It was disgusting!"

"I on the other hand thought it was funny." Chuckled Kasimar.

"Well; today we are going to be playing homage to the brunch of disgustingness with a challenge I like to call…

…

…

…

Pig out or Puke!"

"I don't like *cough* where this is heading." Gulped Spider.

"Today's challenge is going to be done in teams unlike last years eating challenge. Whatever dish is put in front of you, no matter how disgusting it is, you must eat it to progress. If you refuse to eat the meal OR if you puke after eating it … you're out! The first team to lose all their members has to vote someone off. The team with the last person standing or the most people at the end will win first place."

"What if more than one team has the same amount of members remaining at the end?" Asked Lavender.

"Shut up! I was getting to that." Growled Chris. "A tie will almost definitely not occur as this time we have a total of fifty courses so its likely we'll find a winner sooner rather than later."

"This sounds pretty easy." Said Kasimar. "I can stomach almost anything."

"Except a trip to the dentist." Smirked Xaria.

Kasimar leant across the table in a flash and snarled at Xaria.

"_What did you say_?" Said Kasimar in an enraged and deadly whisper.

"You sure you want to threaten me?" Asked Xaria as Oscar cracked his knuckles beside her and glared at Kasimar.

"Eh heh … no." Whimpered Kasimar as he got back to his seat.

"Well then." Said Chris with an increasingly big sadistic smile. "Let's see some choking, a bit of bile and a gallon of puke as we begin Pig out or Puke!"

* * *

**Confessional: I'm glad I'm not in that challenge; I have a weak stomach … oh wait, I don't have a stomach … my bad.**

**Spider: I think this is one ***cough* **challenge I won't win; I have ***cough* **got a pretty weak stomach. But maybe ***sneeze* **if I force myself to continue** *gag*** to the end I could ***cough* **impress Quana.**

**Mable: Hopefully this won't be too bad; I have a pretty strong stomach … though I have never really eaten slop except on a triple dog dare. Still; I shouldn't underestimate the opposing teams.**

**Tabitha: Crap! This is one thing I know I won't last the longest in; I have a relatively weak stomach. It comes from living a rich life style and only eating good food … it's also genetic in the family. Still; I have some faith in Vinnie and Uzuri. **

* * *

"Your first course is going to be … moldy bread." Said Chris as several interns bought out a number of slices of some bread with green spots and placed one in front of each of the thirteen campers. "Just so you know the dishes do get harder. Now pig out or puke!"

Barney took a bite of the bread and shrugged indifferently as he quickly finished it off. Lavender was pretty surprised.

"How did you do that? Its green spotted moldy bread!" Said Lavender impressed.

"Pirates used to have to sail the seas with little supplies and thus had to eat what they could get. Besides; I have a reasonable strong stomach … now let's get it on!"

Lavender blinked as she took a bite of the bread and quickly forced herself to swallow it. It was kind of stale and tasted like lint that you'd find in somebody's belly button (not that Lavender had ever eaten lint) but she managed to finish it.

"And much to my disappointment it looks like everyone has got past the first round." Said Chris with a look of disappointment. "Well; maybe somebody will puke in the next round. Let's bring out … the heavily bruised apples!"

Spider cleared his throat upon hearing that.

"I cannot do this round Chris; I *cough* am very allergic to apples." Said Spider as the apples were passed out to the camper.

"Unfortunately my contract prevents me from eliminating you due to an allergy … so I guess I can give you a free pass this round." Said Chris with a frown. "If anybody has any allergies then you can skip a food that would let it off. Personally seeing you all break out in boils and start choking would be funny … but you can't have everything I suppose."

As the campers began eating the bruised and brown colored apples Tabitha had heard that conversation and had a devious idea.

* * *

**Confessional: I smell a rat … a very rich rat.**

**Tabitha: Well, well, it looks like I've found something I can use to my advantage. The question is how to do it. I'll have to think about that; but it doesn't matter what happens to expendable people along the way as long as you achieve your goal … that's what mum says anyway.**

* * *

"Is everyone enjoying one of their five a day?" Taunted Chris with a smirk.

"Go screw a shark you whelp." Said Barney to Chris with a smirk.

A number of people laughed at the insult while Chris looked angered.

"Shut up weirdo!" Snarled Chris. "Has everyone finished the apples yet?"

"Just about." Said Quana as she took a final bite of the apple leaving only the core. "Ok; I'm done."

"Good; time for the third round. This time you are going to be eating … finger and toe nails."

"What?" Said a number of campers in disbelief.

"You heard me; finger nails." Smirked Chris. "Fresh from voted of contestant Patch; you know, the fat guy from day one."

"Oh no." Groaned Vinnie as a small amount of dirty finger and toe nails were placed between each camper.

"Now pig out or puke!" Commanded Chris with a smirk.

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" Said Chef as he looked out of the kitchen.

"Yep; isn't seeing minors suffer funny?"

"I think this is gross." Said Chef. "And I was in NAAM; I've seen a lot of disgusting stuff."

CRUNCH

That was the sound of Spider bravely being the first to take a bite of a finger nail; thankfully Chris had only given them the white bit from the edge but it tasted vile and like sweat and B.O. Spider gagged as his cheeks turned green for a moment before he swallowed.

"It's edible." Said Spider with a sickly gag. "But it *cough* tastes disgusting."

Gradually the other contestants began to eat the fingernails and toenails. It was utterly gross and a real step up from the previous two dishes. Chris snickered and turned to the cameraman who filmed Chris with the camera.

"Isn't this great? Pure suffering and grossness! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Who will be the last camper standing? Who will get voted off? Will anyone die from the food or get food poisoning? And can I get anymore awesome? Find out when we return to the thirteenth day of Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Eeeeewww! Patch's toenails? Yuck! I'm quite glad I'm not a contestant.

What could Tabitha be planning? And is it going to possibly affect Spider and him proclaiming his love for Quana? Will Quana admit her own feelings for Spider? And who is going to win the challenge? Most importantly who will be voted off?

The answers to all of these will be answered in the next chapter of Total Drama Letterz.

Dedicated to Korma – 2010-2011. R.I.P


	29. Day 13, Part 2, Singer and Spider

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and cartoon network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains vomit, gross food, kissing, an allergic reaction, a sadistic host, Quana going nuclear in rage and Uzuri getting drunk. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: **SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **This is probably the most heartwarming and dramatic chapter yet. A lot of interesting stuff happens and a camper crosses the Moral Event Horizon. I am particularly pleased with how this chapter has turned out. And who says thirteen is unlucky? I hope you all enjoy the chapter. And if you enjoy it a lot why not leave a review?

This is gonna be gross!

* * *

Dedicated to Korma 2010 - 2011

* * *

"And we're back." Said Chris while trying not to laugh at the campers. "When we left off the campers were eating fingernails and toenails, bon appetite! Haha!"

"This is so gross." Said Tabitha sickly as she finished the last of the toenails. "I bet you're enjoying this right Chris?"

"You bet I am! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "I just love the sound of suffering."

* * *

**Confessional: That … was gross.**

**Spider: That was disgusting; but ***cough* **I've got to keep going. **

* * *

"And it looks like everyone has finished the round." Said Chris in a little surprise as Lavender ate the last finger nail. "Looks like nobody has dropped out so far … but that might change with the next round! Bring out…

…

…

The gruel!"

"Gruel? Don't they serve that in the army?" Asked Jimmy.

"If that; usually at a prisoner of war camp." Said Eleanor as she gagged at the sight of the sloppy grey blob set down on a plate in front of her.

It was indeed sloppy; it was like a pile of grey slime and it smelt of nothing any of the campers deemed to be edible. Uzuri spooned some of the food and ate some. A moment later she gagged.

"I bet this is what murderers were raised on; why else would they turn to crime?" Said Uzuri sickly.

"I think you might be right." Agreed Vinnie as he shoveled the gross gruel in quickly to get it over with as fast as possible.

As the campers began to eat the gruel they all gagged; it tasted, quite frankly … like shit. It was absolutely terrible! Kasimar was the first to finish and shrugged indifferently.

"Eh, I've had worse." Said Kasimar as he sniggered at the suffering of everyone else. "What's the matter; can't you cool your gruel? Yahahaha!"

"That doesn't make any sense." Gagged Lavender as she finished off the nasty grey slop.

"Your point?" Said Kasimar idly.

Lavender simply turned away from Kasimar and saw the rest of her team was finishing.

"Oh gosh this is disgusting." Gagged Xaria. "I thought Chef's cooking was improving, but this is crap!"

"Actually it's my cooking." Said Chris irritably.

"That explains a lot." Said Xaria as the last bits of gruel were finished.

* * *

**Confessional: Good golly gruel!**

**Xaria: I don't have the strongest stomach so it's understandable that the gruel isn't really agreeing with me … where did Chris learn to cook; a sewer? Blech!**

**Kasimar: That wasn't really so bad. Sure, it was gross as buggery … but the looks of pain and disgust on the others faces made it easier. Yahaha! **

* * *

"Well; you've all finished the gruel, I'll have to say I was expected at least one of you to puke." Said Chris before smirking. "Though some of you do look a little sick so I guess it's not a complete loss."

"I think my stomach is holding a mutiny." Said Jimmy in disgust at the food.

"Me too." Agreed Spider as he held his stomach with one hand. "But we've got *cough* to last as long as we *cough* can."

"True … I just thought; if this is only the beginning what are the final dishes going to be like?" Asked Quana in dread.

"Hopefully not *cough* too bad." Said Spider with a cough.

"Time for the next course." Said Chris with a snigger. "I hope you like fish."

"Are we eating a stickleback with the spines still on yaaar?" Asked Barney. "It had better not be koi!"

"Nope; though sticklebacks would have been a good idea … this time you are eating … fish eyes! Haha!" Laughed Chris snidely as the interns passed out bowls to the campers; each of them had three fish eyes on them.

"Oh you've gotta be kidding me." Said Oscar in a deadpan voice.

"Nope; this is your fifth course." Smirked Chris.

Barney looked at the fish eyes hesitantly and scooped them up; he ate them and swallowed without even chewing them.

"Good idea Barney." Said Eleanor as she mimicked how Barney had eaten the fish eyes. Like the pirate she didn't taste anything.

Everyone else had seen this and copied what Barney had done; not even one camper had to taste the slimy fish eyes. Chris was visibly annoyed.

"NO! NO! NOOOO! You weren't supposed to do that! You had to chew them and hopefully puke you #bleep# idiots!" Roared Chris.

"Take a chill pill; it's no big deal." Said Vinnie in amusement at Chris's temper tantrum.

"It so is a big deal! I had twenty bucks that somebody would puke by the fifth round; now I'm down by two tenners! Dammit!" Growled Chris. "But maybe the next dish will make everything better. Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Somebody is definitely a grumpy Gus.**

**Spider: Chris really needs to ***cough* **calm down. All that rage is ***cough* **bad for his blood pressure.**

**Eleanor: Tut, tut, a grown man having a tantrum like a baby … how immature of him. Chris should act his age, not his shoe size. **(Eleanor laughs in mirth).

**Barney: It pains me to se a grown man cry … but on the other hand it's hilarious to see a grown man have a temper tantrum! Yohohohohoho! What a jellyfish!**

**Tabitha: Chris should keep his emotions in check like I do. Its how nobody suspects a thing so far … and also how they never will.**

* * *

"Ok; the sixth dish is going to be … olives!" Cackled Chris as plates of green olives were passed around.

"Eeeeewww!" Flinched Uzuri. "Olives are gross!"

"You don't say." Gagged Tabitha as she began to eat the disgusting dish.

"Olives are the worst thing since Geography class; yaaaar, this is peg leggedly cruel." Said Barney as he began to force feed himself the food.

"I hate olives." Gagged Mable as she quickly ate the gross vegetables (and I use the term vegetable loosely).

"This isn't so bad." Said Kasimar as he bit into his third olive and gagged. "Seeing you all suffer makes it a whole lot more bearable for me. Yahaha!"

The other four members of Team Grenade glared at Kasimar as they ate the olives. Xaria had turned a shade of green while eating them.

"Xaria; are you ok?" Asked Oscar as he glanced at his girlfriend.

"I hate olives." Groaned Xaria. "I think … I'm gonna hurl!"

Xaria got up and ran to the window and puked as well as coughed sickly. Chris began to laugh as Xaria groaned in disgust from the bile.

"And Xaria is out!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "I would have thought Spider would have been the first out but I guess seeing bumble bee puke isn't that bad either! Haha!"

"Shut up Chris." Said Oscar firmly.

"Ok, no need to get testy!" Said Chris fearfully as he knew all too well how strong Oscar was.

Xaria leaned back in from the window and staggered back to her seat. She sat down and sighed in disappointment. Oscar patted her back in comfort.

"This bites; I was the first one out." Said Xaria bitterly.

"Don't worry about it; we can still win, and if not Kasimar is gonna get voted off. Either way you're still going to be here." Said Oscar with a smile.

"Thanks Oscar." Said Xaria with a smile of her own.

"No problem." Replied Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: I hate olives!**

**Oscar: Truth be told I hate olives as well; in fact, I don't know a single person who even likes them. That's probably why Chris served them; because everyone hates them.**

**Chris: Steroid monkey catches on quick; and besides, suffering is funny! Provided it isn't me who is suffering that is. Haha!**

* * *

"The next dish is going to be … bacon cubes!" Said Chris with a snigger.

"What's so bad about that?" Asked Lavender. "Everything's great with bacon."

"Ah; but you aren't eating the meat … you're eating cubes of the fat! Haha!" Laughed Chris as plates with cubes of bacon fat on them were passed around. "Now pig out or puke!

"This is insanitary." Gagged Quana as she hesitantly ate one of the bacon fat cubes and made a funny face of disgust.

"Yuck … yuck … yuck." Said Barney every time he chewed. When he swallowed he looked quite relieved before he saw more on the plate. "Yaaaar man."

"I'm wondering if Chris *cough* read the recipes upside down *cough* to make them this bad." Gagged Spider as he swallowed another bacon fat cube and shuddered.

"He's defiantly not as good as Gary." Agreed Quana as she ate another bacon fat cube and gagged. "I'm wondering if Chris had any originality left; most of the recent challenges have been reused from last season."

"But this time *cough* we've got fifty courses at *gag* most." Said Spider as he went cross eyed in repulsion of the food. "Ok; I finished … I *cough* _never_ want to eat those again."

"You're not the only one." Said Quana as she finished the last one as she faced her crush. "This challenge is pretty demanding on my stomach; I feel kind of sickly."

"Welcome to *cough* my world." Said Spider glumly. "Join the sick side; we *cough* have haribo."

Quana began to laugh at Spider's joke and soon Spider joined in though he coughed every couple of seconds.

* * *

**Confessional: Join the confessional side; we have toilets!**

**Spider: **(He sighs dreamily). **I love that ***cough* **girl.**

**Quana: **(She sighs dreamily). **I love that boy.**

**Chris: **(He sighs dreamily). **I love myself! Haha!**

* * *

Uzuri lowered her head so she was level with the last of her bacon fat cubes; she poked it and jiggled like jelly.

"It's so wobbly; kinda like jelly but it probably tastes like bone marrow. Ick!" Said Uzuri as she picked it up and swallowed it whole.

"That'a girl Uzuri." Clapped Vinnie.

"Good job Uzuri … oooo, I don't feel well." Groaned Tabitha as she held her hand to her gut.

"Are you ok Tabitha; don't puke!" Said Uzuri frantically.

"Don't worry; I'm not out of this yet … but I don't have a very strong stomach." Explained Tabitha. "Well; at least all the fatty bacon cubes are gone … I'll never look at bacon the same way again. This is more painful than that visit from my cousin … and I'm not getting into that."

"Looks like everyone's done." Noted Vinnie as the plates of every camper were empty.

"So all of you but Xaria are still in?" Said Chris in surprise. "Well; before we continue will the big fat first loser please get up and move to the loser table."

Chris pointed to a fourth table at the edge of the room. Xaria frowned as she got up. As she walked past Chris she kicked him in the shin.

"OW!" Wailed Chris as he hopped up and down in pain; everybody laughed and most applauded Xaria, no prizes for guessing who didn't applaud.

"No applause necessary; I've wanted to do that for a while." Smirked Xaria as she sat at the loser table to watch the rest of the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: I have got no shin to have kicked.**

**Lavender: Gooooo Xaria!**

* * *

"Ok; the next course is going to hopefully make SOMEBODY puke up chunks. This time you're going to be eating … lemons that are past their sell by date by eight months! Haha!" Laughed Chris as each camper received a lemon. "And you have to eat the whole thing, juice, seeds and skin, no exceptions! Haha!"

"Well; I like lemonade … so how bad could this be?" Said Jimmy as he picked up the lemon.

"I'm with you there me heartie! When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade! Yaaaar." Said Barney as he picked up his lemon.

Both boys took a large bite of the lemons … and instantly wished they hadn't. Their faces went all funny and twisted and they shuddered a bit. Barney swallowed and hung his tongue out with a wacky grin from the sour taste.

"Sooooooour." Said Barney as he twitched a little.

Jimmy had eaten a large chunk of the lemon and the extreme sour taste was overwhelming as he felt sickly.

"Are you ok Jimmy?" Asked Eleanor in concern.

"Gang way!" Yelled Jimmy as he covered his mouth and ran out of the mess hall; the sound of puking was heard a moment or two later. Chris cackled at both Jimmy's misfortune and the lemon induced looks on the campers faces.

"You guys look like clowns." Smirked Chris sadistically.

He was met with several campers flipping him the bird at once. Chris blinked and frowned.

"Now that isn't very nice is it?" Pouted Chris immaturely. "But then again neither next meal."

Jimmy walked back into the mess hall looking sickly and wiped his mouth a little.

"I never want to even _look_ at a lemon again." Said Jimmy as he sat next to Xaria by the losers table.

"You ok little guy?" Asked Xaria.

"I'll be fine; though I doubt I'll be wanting a sherbet lemon for a while." Said Jimmy with a small chuckle. "Oh, and by the way, congratulations on hooking up with Oscar."

Xaria blushed and smiled.

"Thanks.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd probably hook up with the kitchen pantry.**

**Jimmy: Its nice to see Xaria's happy; she's my friend and I don't really like to see my friends upset … and she really was upset yesterday. I don't know why yet but it might be rude to ask.**

* * *

"The next course you losers are going to eat is pretty gross … you are going to be eating pig tongues! Haha!"

The sound of crickets chirping could be heard through the silence which is odd considering it was only around midday. Mable broke the silence.

"Oh for goodness sakes, you gotta be kidding me!" Said Mable in repulsion as interns handed dishes to each of the contestants and took away the empty plates from previous courses. Each one had a cooked, but clearly gross, pink colored pig tongue on it. Uzuri glanced at it and blinked.

"Can I get a hotdog roll with this?" Asked Uzuri as she poked the squidgy tongue. "And maybe some wasabi?"

"Yeeeeeeeee NO!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Now everybody eat up or I'll have you drink a cup of Patch's piss, Haha!"

The threatened alternative to the pig tongue was so horribly vile that the campers still in the competition quickly began to eat their meals … with a bit of hesitation.

"How I wish I could have some ketchup with this savvy?" Said Barney as he took a bite and gulped. "Hmmm … not that bad … but it would have probably been better if it was grilled."

"I may like hotdogs but this is way out of the question." Said Quana as she took a bite. "How are you holding up Spider?"

"Not very *cough* well." Said Spider as he bit into his pig tongue and wretched for a moment. "But I'm not giving *sneeze* up."

"That's the spirit Spider." Applauded Eleanor as she finished her pig tongue and gagged in disgust. "Note to self; slimy and gooey is NOT a good combination."

"But we've all *cough* passed at least." Said Spider sickly. "This is definitely not *cough* food I would eat *cough* if I was given a choice."

"Amen to that." Agreed Quana with a sickly burp.

* * *

**Confessional: I have no tongue … or any human body part for that matter.**

**Spider: I've suddenly grown a ***sneeze* **dislike for pork related foods.**

**Barney: Yaaaaar; that was a gross as Davey Jones locker; Davey works out a lot and has seriously sweaty socks. He stinks as much as a guy at my school called Walter who like me is on the honor roll … yes I'll admit to it this time; you've all probably figured it out anyway savvy?**

**Lavender … I hate Chris.**

**Chris: Shut up! I hate you! Grrrr!**

* * *

Team Grenade were sickened by the food they had to eat; pigs tongues? What the hell was Chris thinking … more importantly, how did he escape from hell? That's what Lavender was thinking as she gulped the last of the pig tongue and gagged.

"I really don't like this challenge." Lamented Lavender as she leaned an elbow on the table and sighed. "Sure, I like greasy food but this is way past my limit."

"What a weak girl." Sneered Kasimar as he belched from his tongue. "This isn't that bad. I just wish they'd give us a curry; maybe a Vindaloo."

"I would be impressed with your ability to stomach this crap if it weren't for the fact you are a sexist, narcissistic and sociopath of a person." Shot Lavender. "Girls are just as good as guys you know!"

"Oh really; let me put it in a way you can understand. If girls invented everything we'd be in the Stone Age. Yahaha!" Laughed Kasimar at his sexist comment.

"If I had a gun I'd shoot you in the crotch." Said Lavender with a snarl. "And were you by any chance related to Hitler? You're as evil as he is a times!"

"Nope; but for you I could be." Said Kasimar as he wiggled his bushy eyebrows seductively.

"Yuck! No way!" Gagged Lavender. "I thought you hated me!"

"I do; but I can appreciate you have a great rack." Chuckled Kasimar.

Kasimar was met with a plate thrown at his face.

* * *

**Confessional: "Plate" mail … get it?**

**Kasimar: Totally worth it; seeing her upset is pretty funny. Yahahaha!**

**Lavender: If Kasimar got his own spin off series it would be called 'The Awful Asshole'. He has no tact; I wonder if his parents are murderers by any chance.**

* * *

"And everyone has eaten the pig tongues." Said Chris in surprise. "I would have at least two of you would have puked in that round; but maybe you won't be so lucky in the next round. This one is going to have a bit of a 'love it or hate it' thing going on. That's right … I'm talking about beer!"

A small glass filled with some sort of alcoholic beverage was passed to each camper. Eleanor raised an eyebrow dubiously and glanced at Chris like he was an idiot.

"In case you haven't noticed it yet I'm twelve; in other words I'm underage." Said Eleanor nice and slow for Chris's benefit. "In fact; I'm sure we all are; the minimum age in eighteen!"

"That's no problem; this is a special recipe with a various alcohol substitutes to replicate the taste yet not get you drunk. Well; you might get drunk but I doubt that'll happen." Shrugged Chris clearly not caring. "Anyway; get chugging as its time to pig out or puke!"

Kasimar drank the drink in a instant and belched.

"Is that supposed to be gross?" Asked Kasimar snidely. "That was pretty good."

"I tried in on the interns and they hated it." Said Chris in a little surprise. "Well; I guess they had weak stomachs anyway."

The contestants were drinking the glasses of the drink without too much difficulty. Uzuri had finished her and hiccupped after the final gulp.

"Uzuri … are you ok?" Asked Vinnie as he looked at his girlfriend with a raised eyebrow.

Uzuri's eyes looked a little unfocused and she was starting to get a silly smile on her face as she swayed side to side. She appeared to be drunk.

"Hello Mr. Spoon." Giggled Uzuri as she waved to the spoon on the table.

"Chris; I think Uzuri is drunk." Said Vinnie as he watched his lover start to hum the tune to 'Never Gonna Give You Up'.

"Hmm; I wondered who would get that one." Chuckled Chris.

"What?" Blinked Vinnie as Chris's words started to sink in. "You spiked her drink?"

"I spiked one of the drinks; I didn't have any way of knowing Uzuri would get it. Boy this'll be good for ratings! Haha!"

"What was in the spiked drink?" Asked Vinnie as Uzuri started to imitate a pear shooter.

"Just a dab of whisky and some pure alcohol, nothing much." Chuckled Chris. "Anyway; time to move onto the next course in the challenge!"

Vinnie felt anger at Chris but knew he had to make sure Uzuri didn't end up hurting herself. He turned to his girlfriend and saw she was smiling at Tabitha with distorted eyes.

"Are you … quite alright Uzuri?" Asked Tabitha while masking her amusement.

"…You're sexy!" Giggled Uzuri as she put her elbows on the table and laughed while looking at Tabitha slyly.

"Err … come again?" Said Tabitha with an uncomfortable look on her face.

"…Gimme a kiss!" Cooed Uzuri as she leaned for Tabitha; the taller and far more sober girl quickly backed her chair and herself out of Uzuri's reach.

"This could present a problem." Groaned Tabitha as some of the others laughed at the current situation.

* * *

**Confessional: Slam drunk … now where have I heard that before?**

**Tabitha: The last thing I need is another girl hitting on me! Back at school people will be teasing me that a freak wanted to kiss me while under the influence of alcohol! She may not have succeeded but I'll never live this down.**

**Vinnie: I'm pretty sure Uzuri is straight and has her affections on me so that whole scene right then didn't bother me. Still; I now know to keep Uzuri away from the alcohol if we ever go out to some fancy restaurant or something. Though I have to say she did say some funny things.**

**Jimmy: No wonder there is a drinking limit; Uzuri went a bit doo lally. **

**Kasimar: Damn it! I would have really liked to see two girls swap spit. I guess I could hire people to do that once I win the million.**

**Uzuri: **(She is still drunk and her shirt is a tiny bit ruffled up which has revealed a hot pink strap of her bra). **The day goes down to the base of the floor to cuddle me by the hourglass! Teehee!**

* * *

"Following that the next dish is going to be vomit pizza!" Smirked Chris.

"I have … no comment." Groaned Oscar in disgust.

"Yuck; vomit isn't for eating, its for ruining peoples Prom dresses." Said Kasimar in equal disgust.

"I don't even want to know." Said Mable with a shake of her head as each camper still in the game received a slice of brownish green pizza.

Uzuri ate it in one bite and giggled as she swayed a bit more. Vinnie followed her lead and quickly gagged in disgust as some bile rose from his throat; thankfully he managed to swallow it.

"Here goes; no need to hold me and force feed it to me like Trent last season." Said Mable as she took a bite of the pizza and her eyes widened and watered in disgust. A bit of liquid vomit had leaked out of the pizza and into her mouth.

"Oh good lord … BLEEEEECH!" Gagged Mable as she vomited … right into Kasimar's face.

Stunned Silence.

Kasimar blinked and screamed in fury while everyone else began to laugh at him.

"You stupid **bitch**!" Roared Kasimar as he leapt over the table and pushed Mable down. "Why couldn't you just #bleep# hold it in!"

"Leave my friend alone." Said Oscar as he picked Kasimar up over his head and tossed him back over the table and into a heap onto the floor. "And you may want a napkin to wipe your face with."

"And Mable is out." Laughed Chris. "To the loser table with you."

Mable got back up and groggily staggered to a seat on the loser table and sat down.

"Are you ok Mable?" Asked Xaria. "You're not hurt are you?"

"Naw; I'll be fine, takes more than a push to hurt me." Said Mable before gagging sickly. "But that food is disgusting. I don't event want to know what the final few dishes are going to be like."

"Thankfully we won't have to try them as we're already out." Said Jimmy in relief. "Thank goodness for that because I'm thinking that Chris would make us eat something like Patch's armpit hair; yuck! Besides; you aren't going to be voted off is Kasimar is on the chopping block too.

Both Xaria and Mable looked quite sickened at that prospect and were in a way relieved they had lost as they were in no danger of being voted off anyway.

* * *

**Confession: Patch's armpits are a place you **_**don't**_** want to make a pit stop. **_**Seriously**_**. **

**Xaria: Jimmy presents an excellent point; me and Mable aren't going to be voted off in the team stage as long as Kasimar is around. I guess it doesn't really matter that we're out. And Mable being sick on Kasimar's face, while disgusting, is one of those moments where life gives you a freebie. Heeheeheehee! **

**Jimmy: What can I say; I'm no Dick Dastardly; I'm more of a Dudley Do Right, always stopping to help.**

**Mable: While that food was awful and I don't even want to know who the vomit belonged to … puking on Kasimar was very satisfying; I don't even feel bad for him … that's alright isn't it?**

* * *

"Ok; I think its time for the next dish." Sniggered Chris at the vomit on Kasimar's face. "How does a moldy strudel sound?"

"Sounds as dreadful as the bagpipes." Muttered Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: Bagpipes; my old nemesis.**

**Oscar: It is a well known fact that the Bagpipes are the worst instrument in the world; they narrowly beat the accordion.**

* * *

"Does the strudel have *cough* apples in it?" Asked Spider quickly.

"It might; why?" Asked Chris dully.

"Because I'm allergic to *cough* them as I told you not *sneeze* too long ago." Said Spider in exasperation.

"Ok; whatever. Spider can sit this one out." Shrugged Chris. "I don't want to get sued by his parents if he dies."

"It wouldn't kill *cough* me but I'd be *cough* seriously harmed." Said Spider patiently.

"Yeah; I kind of don't care." Sneered Chris as a five inch long piece of moldy strudel was placed in front of each camper besides Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Five inches ain't gonna impress the ladies! LOLOLOLOLOL! **

**Spider: Chris is a pretty nasty ***sneeze* **guy. I generally have an extreme ***cough* **amount of patience but Chris ***cough* **is wearing to down. I try to ***cough* **not think about the last time I ***cough* **ran out of patience with someone. It was a bully … but ***gag* **still…**

**Quana: Chris really doesn't care about our safety does he? What if Spider actually got hurt from the allergy? I'd be the first person to not only get some lawyers here but also play a game of 'kickball' with Chris if you know what I mean … I mean that I'd give him the groin attack to end all groin attacks! **

**Chris: Shut up! Though … maybe I should wear a jock strap or something just in case.**

* * *

"Look; a strindandal!" Slurred Uzuri drunkly. "Maybe he's Spanish! Teehee!"

Uzuri quickly ate the strudel and burped. She giggled as she started to sway side to side and soon enough fell backwards onto the floor.

"Are you ok Uzuri?" Asked Vinnie as he offered his beloved a helping hand.

"So many stars! I'll call you Billy, you Bob, you Liz and you … um … Billy! Teehee!"

"I don't think the alcohol is agreeing with her." Said Vinnie with a loving smile as he chuckled at Uzuri's antics. "At least you can't cause any harm right … how are you doing Tabitha?"

"I think I have just tasted the culinary form of the Grim Reaper." Gagged Tabitha as she swallowed a particularly moldy and crusty piece of pasty with a slimly lumpy bit of green custard in it. "Ooooo; I don't feel too good."

"Are you gonna be sick?" Asked Vinnie. "Don't hold it down; that could be bad for you. It's ok if you can't continue.

"Be right back." Said Tabitha as she got up and ran to the window Xaria was at earlier and then she puked hard.

"And Tabitha is out." Said Chris as he slapped his knee and laughed sadistically.

* * *

**Confessional: Sing it Earl! You're outta here!**

**Tabitha: While the food was completely rancid I still don't think I will go home if our team is voted off. Uzuri won't vote for me though Vinnie might … but in the possible case of a tie I'm guessing somebody from another team will vote for one of us. I'm pretty well liked so I should be safe. And hey; we may not lose. And on that note I really hope Uzuri sobers up soon; she's going completely nuts!**

* * *

Tabitha walked to the loser table and sat next to Xaria. She gagged and faked a sigh. Xaria didn't realize it was a fake sigh though.

"Something wrong Tabitha?" Asked Xaria.

"Well; it's simply that my team has the fewest members as you have probably noticed. I'm great friends with both Uzuri and Vinnie … if we lose I don't know who to vote for, especially now that they're dating. And I can't vote for myself … so what should I do?"

"Well; you never know, Team Jungle could pull off a win. Part of me is hoping that my team loses so we can boot of Kasimar." Said Xaria.

"Ayup; he's a dick alright." Said Tabitha which was actually Tabitha's true opinion. "Well; here's hoping that nasty bully gets the boot."

"We're all hoping that." Added Mable.

"…Oh; and before I forget; congratulations on hooking up with Oscar." Said Tabitha smiling falsely.

"Thanks; I really feel a connection with him." Blushed Xaria. "Maybe you could find someone too."

"Maybe; you never know." Said Tabitha as she relaxed to watch the rest of the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd hoping she doesn't.**

**Tabitha: All too easy; Xaria seems to think I'm a pretty sweet and kind person. Eventually I'll have pretty much everyone under my finger. Of course, Kasimar is in my alliance but that's only because I can bribe him to 'eliminate people. Truth be told I don't trust the guy as far as I can throw him.**

* * *

"Ok; hopefully we can get some more vomit in the next minute." Said Chris as the last bit of strudel was eaten. "How do you all feel?"

"Sick." Gagged Eleanor.

"As queasy as *cough* normal." Groaned Spider.

"Like #bleep#." Grunted Kasimar.

"Wheeee!" Giggled Uzuri drunkly.

"Very good then; lets see if we can make any of you want to die." Cackled Chris as he rubbed his hands together. "Your next meal is going to be …

…

…

Snail slime soup!"

More cricket chirping.

"This is getting ridiculous." Groaned Oscar as a bowl of green, slimy and very yucky snail slime was placed in front of him.

"Ok everyone, time to pig out or puke!" Smirked Chris as the campers picked up their spoons VERY reluctulently and hesitantly; they could tell they were not going to enjoy this at all.

Kasimar was the first to try some; he ate a spoonful and gagged.

"Urgh! This tastes even worse than sprouts!" Said Kasimar dully as he began to shovel it in to get it over with.

"If only we had a blindfold." Sighed Lavender as she resigned herself to her fate and began to eat, gagging with every spoonful.

Uzuri seemed to be at the height of her drunkenness and slammed face first into the bowl.

"What are you doing Uzuri?" Asked Vinnie.

"Glub blubbb glubby!" Said Uzuri; a moment later she sat back up and began to sway. The bowl was completely empty. "Tastes like a yellow crayon! Teehee!"

"Good job Uzuri." Smiled Vinnie as he patted Uzuri on the back. He then began to eat; gagging and choking from the awful taste as he did so.

* * *

**Confessional: That food, if you can call it that, looked truly terrible!**

**Lavender: **(Her cheeks are a light shade of green). **I don't feel too good. How can anybody eat that garbage?**

**Spider:** (He looks seriously unwell).** I think that meal bought ***cough* **a new term to the word ***cough* **disgusting.**

**Tabitha: Good thing I was eliminated when I was; now I can relax and enjoy everyone else having a hard time. And seriously; that slimly stuff looked vile.**

**Eleanor: **(She had vomit stains around her mouth). **And this is precisely why I don't like slimy things. Blech!**

* * *

Spider was force feeding himself the food even though his stomach felt like it was begging for mercy; he continued though because he wanted to impress Quana. Quana looked at Spider both impressed and concerned.

"Are you enjoying this slop Spider?" Asked Quana as she watched Spider shovel it down.

"No; it's absolutely *cough* awful … but I don't want *cough* us to lose." Gagged Spider as he finished the snail slime soup and gagged.

"If you couldn't manage it you didn't have to finish it." Said Quana as she put a tanned hand on Spider's shoulder. "Why are you pushing yourself so much anyway?"

"Err … well." Began spider; this was his chance! He could tell Quana how he felt about her. He swallowed his nervousness and began to explain.

"Well Quana; I've been pushing *cough* myself past my limit *cough* because … I am *cough* really, absolutely, truly in-."

Spider was interrupted by the sound of puking. Eleanor had been sick and looked pretty unwell. She groaned and clutched her belly in pain.

"I think my stomach just turned itself inside out." Said Eleanor before making a sickly burp.

"And Eleanor is out." Laughed Chris. "I guess her little weak kiddy tummy couldn't cope! To the loser table with you, and try not to be sick anymore … seriously, these shoes were expensive!"

Eleanor sat up and staggered to the loser table and slumped down into a chair.

"Are you ok Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy in concern. "You look as green as the Incredible Hulk."

"I'll be fine." Said Eleanor with a weak smile. "I just don't ever want to have to eat anything like that again."

"I don't think you'll have to; Chris won't use the challenge a second time." Said Jimmy hopefully. "If he does he's really getting really unoriginal."

"Thank goodness." Said Eleanor in relief at not having to do another eating challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: Unoriginality is common in the twenty first century.**

**Chris: I am not unoriginal! I am as original as LittleBigPlanet! And let's not forget I'm awesome; and besides, Eleanor is just a stupid meek little girl.**

**Mable: I didn't even taste that slop and I could almost taste how bad it was! Poor Eleanor.**

* * *

Quana had watched Eleanor get eliminated; a moment later she turned back tp Spider.

"So … what was it you were going to tell me?" Asked Quana with a sweet smile; the smile that made Spider nervous.

"Errm … you know what; I'll tell *cough* you after the challenge, that *cough* way I won't be interrupted *cough* and I'll probably feel *sneeze* less dead on my feet." Gagged Spider sickly.

"Ok then; I just hope the next dish of the devil isn't too bad." Said Quana as she held her tanned belly sickly. "I don't think that last course agreed with me."

"Me neither." Groaned Spider. "…You still look great *cough* though; far better than *cough* Kasimar."

"Yeah; he sure had that coming." Giggled Quana.

"My my me hearties." Chuckled Barney from his seat. "You two are getting along swimmingly … it's _almost_ as though you two are going out."

Both Spider and Quana blushed brightly and smiled nervously at each other before concentrating on their knifes and forks.

* * *

**Confessional: Can you feel the love tonight? Even though it is still daytime.**

**Spider: Why do I have to be ***cough* **so nervous about loving Quana? Maybe ***sneeze* **its because I haven't really socialized ***cough* **with girls much before … let alone ***cough* **one as wonderful as Quana. I gotta toughen ***cough* **up.**

**Quana: Does Barney know I like Spider? I'm positive he's far smarter than he lets on. Boy; that was embarrassing … but Spider's kinda cute when he's nervous. **(Quana giggles).

**Barney**: **I can just tell the merge is very soon; after that it'll be a free for all savvy? And if me hearties don't confess their undying love for each other before then one of them could be voted off before they do. Then they'll never be together **(Barney looks determined). **And I won't let that happen. Yaaaaar!**

* * *

"Ok everyone; it looks like five people have puked so far … I think after that particularly gross meal I shall be merciful and permit you a fifteen minute break." Said Chris with a smirk. "Well; why aren't you sucking up to me? You know how much I'd like that."

"Talk to the hand; the face ain't listening." Said Lavender as she held up a hand to Chris and left the mess hall.

"Rude bitch." Muttered Chris. "Oh; and you can't puke while on the break, I wouldn't want anyone getting an unfair advantage, it'd kill the suspense of the challenge."

One by one the campers got up and left the mess hall; Kasimar looked pretty happy though it might be because he would be able to wipe off the vomit on his face.

"Hmm; fifteen minutes … just enough time to put on some hair gel." Said Chris happily as he left the mess hall not noticing one camper hiding from view.

Once Chris was out of the mess hall Tabitha got up from crouching behind a chair. Nobody had noticed her hang behind or saw her duck from sight. Tabitha smirked as she quickly entered the kitchen.

"Yuck; what is that stuff?" Gagged Tabitha as she looked at all the numerous gross meals on a large table "Now lets see; how to let off the allergy?"

Tabitha's eyes scanned around the room and landed on the fridge. She quickly approached it and opened it; inside was a mostly full carton of apple juice.

"Perfect." Grinned Tabitha sneakily.

Tabitha took the apple juice and looked over the table; she noticed a set of glasses with a disgusting blend of goodness knows what in it. Tabitha glanced towards the door to make sure nobody was watching her. With full concentration she poured some apple juice into each glass, that way no matter which one Spider received he would surely have an allergic reaction.

"Everything is going according to plan … this is almost too easy." Said Tabitha with airy delight at her plan as she put the apple juice back where she had found it and left the kitchen and outside so nobody would get suspicious.

* * *

**Confessional: Crossing the Moral Event Horizon, a low blow indeed.**

**Tabitha: its simple strategy; Spider, while no threat overall, is very well liked so might end up getting far, I aim to prevent that. But I saw the way him and Quana were looking at each other, I think cupid's arrow has hit them both. If they hook up it'll just make things harder for me. So it'll be goodbye to Mr. Cough by the end of today.**

* * *

Barney had steered Spider behind the mess hall once they were outside and was talking to him seriously.

"C'mon Spider me lad; what was that?" Asked Barney. "You are moments away from potentially hooking up with the girl of your dreams but you can barely form a coherent sentence. What's up with that?"

"I just feel too *cough* nervous." Explained Spider with a dejected sigh. "I feel all warm *cough* inside when I'm around her and *cough* I guess I'm worried about what *sneeze* she'll say."

"Spider me heartie; trust me as you're friend that Quana might feel the same way about you. You saw her blush back in the mess hall didn't you me heartie?" Asked Barney with a smirk.

"Only because you were *cough* teasing us." Chuckled Spider. "Ok; I said I'd tell her *cough* after the challenge … and I'm not *gag* going back on that."

"Yeah! Go spider!" Whooped Barney. "I can tell by the end of the day you're life will have more meaning and you will have kissed Quana on her sweet lips. Everybody's a winner! Yaaaaar!"

"You're one of a *cough* kind Barney." Smiled Spider. "But how can I *cough* ever repay you for all your *sneeze* help?"

"Name your first child after me." Said Barney swiftly.

"What!" Gasped Spider in extreme embarrassment. "We're not even *cough* dating, and I haven't even *gag* kissed her! I don't think now is *sneeze* the time to think about … well … *cough* sex."

"Party pooper." Laughed Barney. "Well; I was just joking anyway me heartie."

"Attention campers; it is time to come back to the mess hall for more suffering; hope you have a sick bucket! Haha!" Laughed Chris over the intercom.

"Well, back to what we were doing." Said Barney cheerfully.

* * *

**Confessional: I was doing nothing!**

**Spider: That … was the most awkward ***cough* **conversation I've ever had.**

* * *

The campers trudged back into the mess hall as though they were inmates approaching a firing squad. The campers who had already been sick sat by the loser table while the others sat around their tables they had been on. All the vomit had been cleared up and Chris was looking pretty amused.

"Ok everyone; I want to see some crying and puking so lets get right to it!" Said Chris sadistically. "Your next dish is going to be saltwater!"

"But I hate salt." Said Lavender.

"And its terrible for your heart." Added Mable from her seat on the loser table.

"And I don't care; now drink it!" Snapped Chris. "Time to pig out or puke!"

The interns handed out the drinks and the campers began to sip the salt water; they gagged as they did so; it was so awful and really gag inducing.

"I'm a pirate and even I don't like this." Said Barney with a groan as he set down his empty mug.

"Yuck!" Gagged Quana.

"I think I'm gonna hurl." Said Lavender as she gasped for air and ran outside the mess hall; the sounds of Lavender being sick could be heard.

"And Lavender is out." Laughed Chris.

"Told you girls were weak." Smirked Kasimar. "Only the guys are left on this team. Yahaha"

"Zip it asshole!" Said Oscar with a growl.

Lavender entered the mess hall and sat down next to Xaria on the loser table.

"I … hate … this … challenge." Said Lavender sickly.

* * *

**Confessional: Every time somebody pukes in me I feel dead inside.**

**Lavender: Salt is gross; I prefer ketchup on my chips thank you very much.**

* * *

"Seven left; lets see if we can end this challenge within the hour." Said Chris as he glanced at his watch. "Your next dish is going to be quite disgusting, you'll be eating…

…

…

Chicken feathers with honey!"

"That just sounds sick." Groaned Vinnie in thought of the tickly and sticky feathers.

"Ish thish my shoe shop?" Slurred Uzuri as she was still pretty drunk.

"Time to pig out or puke!" Cackled Chris as the completely insanitary meal was handed out to the campers.

Oscar picked up a honey covered feather and ate it; he began to cough as he did so as the feather tickled his throat as it went down.

"At least the honey tastes good." Sighed Oscar as he tried to look at the few positives of the situation.

"This isn't that bad you wuss." Sneered Kasimar as he ate the feathers though he too looked a little green.

Choking and coughing filled the room as the icky gross meal was eaten. The losers watched the challenge and felt extreme sympathy for their friends though felt amused at Kasimar's suffering.

"This is brutal." Said Xaria as he watched Barney at a feather only for it to come out of his nose.

"And quite disgusting." Agreed Tabitha. "But it could be worse."

"True; Chris could be serving raw chicken; that's a major high risk food." Said Mable before groaning. "I've probably jinxed it now that I've gone and said that.

* * *

**Confessional: Wynx Jinx!**

**Chris: That would have been a good idea but stupid legal restrictions prevent me from doing something like that. Darn shame.**

* * *

The campers managed to finish the meal without anyone else throwing up. Vinnie looked pretty sick but then again pretty much everyone looked quite unwell.

"Maybe the next course will really upset your stomach." Cackled Chris manically as he snapped his fingers. "Bring out the bug juice!"

Some interns bought out several glasses containing a brownish grey liquid. Tabitha instantly saw these were the drinks she had put apple juice into. She kept her face neutral though inside she felt pretty smug her plan was working.

"This drink is made of a delicious and very nutritious blend of about sixty nine invertebrates. Pig out or puke people!" Chuckled Chris.

Vinnie was the first to pick up a glass of the bug drink. He eyed it wearily and after a moment of hesitation he downed it.

"Yuck!" Gagged Vinnie as he ran out o his chair and to the window some other campers had puked out of. He was then sick as Chris laughed.

"Looks like Vinnie is out and team jungle has nearly lost; only a very drunk Uzuri remains for them."

The other campers were more hesitant after seeing this but all picked up the drinks and began to drink. Some finished quickly and others were having trouble. And still others couldn't finish.

"Ack!" Gasped Spider in pain as he clutched his chest and began breathing heavily. He looked to be in immense pain.

"Ooooh dear; looks like Spider is having some trouble." Sniggered Chris.

"Are you ok Spider?" Asked Quana as she finished her drink and turned to her crush. "Are you having a cramp?"

Spider didn't answer; instead he fell backwards off his chair and lay in a heap on the floor, his breathing deep and erratic. Sweat poured down his forehead and his face went pale. The bug drink had clearly not agreed with him.

"Spider!" Screamed Quana as she jumped from her seat and was by Spider's side in an instant. "What's happening? Do you need CPR?"

"Looks like Spider is out of the challenge." Said Chris idly. "Anyway; the next dish w-."

"Hold it right there Chris." Said Barney firmly and angrily. "Me heartie Spider is in great pain and he needs medical attention fast, got it?"

"It won't do much good if we don't know what's caused it." Shrugged Chris while clearly not giving a damn in the slightest.

Barney picked up Spider's glass and without hesitation sipped a little of the drink and concentrated on the taste. His eyes widened in panic.

"This drink has apple juice in it!" Said Barney loudly. "Spider is beyond allergic to apples; we gotta get him to the medical tent!"

The rest of the campers besides Kasimar and a drunken half with it Uzuri looked very concerned about all this. Tabitha wasn't really but was playing the part well; if anything she was actually very pleased her plan was working so well.

"Don't worry spider." Said Quana comfortingly and also very fearfully. "You'll be ok soon."

"He will be after the challenge." Yawned Chris. "We have only a limited time and we can't waste it on useless people."

Quana slowly turned to look at Chris with RAGE in her eyes.

"Spider is not useless." Said Quana angrily. "He is a delightful, intelligent and wonderful young man!"

"Whatever; he isn't me so therefore he is worthless. He'll just have to stay there until the end of the challenge … not that he can go anywhere! He's been crippled! Haha!" Laughed Chris which earned looks of disgust from the angry campers. "And I'm actually about to go on my lunvh break; so anything else you say to me doesn't really count."

Something inside Quana snapped; she calmly rose from by Spider, walked towards Chris and stood for one second.

BAM!

A tan fist and a green trousers covered knee came at Chris's face and crotch respectively. Chris screamed like a baby and fell to the floor crying as Quana towered over him.

"LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE NASTY, AWFUL, COWARDLY, SELF ABSORBED RAT! SPIDER NEEDS MEDICAL ATTENTION AND HE IS GONNA GET IT NOW! IF YOU DON'T THEN SO HELP ME I'LL CASTRATE YOU! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?" Roared Quana in fury.

Chris looked terrified as a large wet patch appeared on his trousers.

"Ok! Ok! Chef; take Spider to the medical tent and give him what he needs to treat his allergy pronto!" Said Chris as he backed away from Quana.

Chef ran out from the kitchen and carefully picked Spider up and over his shoulder. He then jogged off to the medical tent full speed.

All eyes were on Quana as she breathed deeply before blinking.

"I don't know what came over me." Said Quana in embarrassment as she quickly got back to her seat.

* * *

**Confessional: Berserk button has been pressed.**

**Quana: Looking back on it I shouldn't have lost my temper like that. But Spider was clearly in pain and could have really got hurt yet Chris didn't care. I don't like it when people treat the ones I love like crap.**

**Barney: Go Quana! But … does this mean she does love Spider or was she just worried for her friend. Either way this is going to help with my matchmaking yaaaar! But poor Spider; how could this have happened?**

**Tabitha: And so my plan works; Spider is out of the running and may get eliminated by default. Still; only Uzuri is left for our team … I hope she wins this.**

**Kasimar: Yahahaha! Chris actually pissed his pants! And spider could have died! Now **_**that**_** is funny!**

* * *

"Ok then." Said Chris as he tried to ignore the wet feeling in his pants. "Your next meal is going to be a bowl of mayonnaise because lets face it, mayonnaise it gross! Now pig out or puke while I go and change my pants."

Chris zoomed out of the mess hall faster than blinking while the interns handed out bowls of the white creamy food enhancer.

"Oh no; I really hate mayonnaise." Gagged Oscar as he began eating it, it tasted as awful as he expected, maybe worse.

Quana felt a new feeling of determination driven by her anger at Chris and feelings for Spider; due to this she wolfed it down, it tasted disgusting but she ignored it. Barney was quite impressed.

"Yeehaw Quana! You're on a roll! First you make Chris wet himself, then you eat a bowl of mayonnaise … whatever will you do next?" Grinned Barney.

"I … don't know." Said Quana as the full impact of Spider's unfortunate plight hit her.

"Well keep at it; stick it to Chris." Encouraged Barney. "Boy I don't feel very well."

"I don't think any of us do." Replied Quana with a sad frown.

"Gang way!" Said Oscar as he ran out of the mess hall with a green face.

The sounds of retching, gagging and barfing were heard, all of which were very disgusting. Kasimar was pretty amused.

"Yahahahahahaha!" Laughed the nasty bully at his teammate's misfortune. "I bet Xaria won't be giving you tongue anytime soon!"

"Laugh while you can Kasimar; once you puke you're off this island." Warned Xaria with a smirk.

"Whatever bumble bee; I have an iron stomach." Bragged Kasimar with an air of superiority.

Oscar entered the mess hall again and sat on a chair next to the loser's table. He looked pretty sick indeed.

"You ok Oscy?" Asked Xaria affectionately.

"I'll be fine." Said Oscar with a blush at the nickname. "Only Kasimar left, if he loses he's gone. I think I'm going to enjoy this."

"So will I Oscar, so will I." Chuckled Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: I think I'll enjoy it too.**

**Jimmy: Poor Spider … I know! Maybe a get well card would be a nice thing to do. When I'm sick my friends always make one for me, each more wacky than the last. Maybe I could get everyone to sign it … well, everyone except Kasimar that is.**

* * *

"Ok; I'm back; you can stop worrying about the magnificent me now." Said Chris as he entered the mess hall with a clean pair of pants. "The again who wouldn't worry about me? I'm better than all of you! Haha!"

"We weren't worrying." Said Oscar dryly. "We thought it was funny."

"Oh shut up!" Growled Chris. "Anyway; looks like you're out so now only four remain. Isn't this exciting?"

"Surprisingly you are right." Said Eleanor. "And that is _really_ surprising."

"Oh whatever!" Said Chris angrily. "Just bring out the next course; this one is going to be

…

…

Ketchup and expired ice cream!"

"Ick! Those two don't go together at all." Gagged Quana.

"What flavor ice cream is it yaaaar?" Asked Barney.

"Lima bean and olive." Smiled Chris sadistically.

"Chris … I hate you." Said Kasimar with a snarl as he began to eat as the bowls were placed in front of the remaining four.

Uzuri giggled drunkly and began to eat the bowl of the disgusting combination. She was finished within half a minute; maybe being drunk protected her from the awful taste of the olives.

Barney began to eat and it was soon clear he was having trouble; he was gagging with every spoonful and was as green as the ice cream he was force-feeding himself.

"I … can't … go … on." Gagged Barney as he gasped for air.

"You can do it Barney!" Encouraged Quana.

Barney couldn't do it. He leapt up and zoomed out of the mess hall. Everyone could here him being sick. He staggered back in and collapsed weakly in a chair next to Lavender.

"Are you ok Barney? You look terrible." Said Lavender in concern for her secret crush.

"I'll be fine me red headed sea lassie … I just need a sit down and perhaps a wee bit of water." Said Barney with another gag.

"I could do with that too." Agreed Lavender. "At this point I'm hoping my team loses; that way its goodbye to Kasimar."

"Yeah! Send him to his watery grave! Yohohoho!" Laughed Barney.

"A bit too far but completely justified." Smirked Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: I much prefer strawberry ice cream.**

**Lavender: Funnily enough the person I despise the most is the last one for our team; I have no faith whatsoever in him. Unless a hot curry is served Kasimar won't last much longer.**

* * *

"Ok everyone; it's the final three." Said Chris as he looked over Quana, Kasimar and Uzuri. "From now on the game is sudden death; whoever pukes next loses it for their team. Now let's pig out or puke with a dish of sprout pie!"

A slice of green filled pie was placed in front of each of the remaining three and they began to eat. The pie was horrible; it tasted like Patch's farts and a dose of cyanide. Kasimar looked to be in great pain as he ate the pie, Quana looked sickened as she ate it and Uzuri just smiled drunkly as she ate it in one bite but left a small piece of the crust.

"Nap time!" Slurred Uzuri as she lay back and fell onto the floor, a moment later she was asleep as a number of the other campers laughed or looked on in amusement.

"And it looks like Uzuri has fallen asleep which means that Team Jungle has lost once again! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"What?" Growled Tabitha. "But she didn't puke!"

"True; but she's in a drunken sleep so she'll miss a few of the courses and I said that if you can't finish a meal you will also be out; since she is asleep Uzuri will be unable to finish the pie … so Team Jungle loses! Haha!" Explained Chris with a sadistic grin.

"Dammit!" Cursed Xaria. "Looks like Kasimar will be here another day."

"We still have plenty of opportunities to vote him off, don't you worry." Smiled Oscar even though he was irritated Kasimar was the last one of their team yet also he was happy that they might get the prize.

* * *

**Confessional: That wasn't very fair was it?**

**Tabitha: God **#bleep# **dammit! Is Chris **_**trying**_** to **#bleep# **make me lose? If he hadn't got Uzuri drunk we'd have won! That stupid **#bleep# **piece of** #long bleep#**!**

* * *

"And now we know that both Team Puzzle and Team Grenade are safe." Said Chris as he looked at Quana and Kasimar, both of whom looked determined. "But we still need to determine first place … perhaps the next dish will be able to do that."

"What's the next dish?" Asked Quana in dread. "Tree bark? Fish bones? Snot?"

"Good guesses … but no. The next dish is going to be…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Raw Jalapeños!"

"Oh yeah!" Cackled Kasimar as a plate of the extremely hot peppers was placed in front of him and another was placed in front of Quana.

"Time to pig out or puke!" Laughed Chris as he eagerly watched the final two.

Kasimar shrugged and took a big bite of one of the jalapeño's. He chewed and swallowed without even flinching.

"What the … how is that possible." Gasped Quana. "How can you not feel the heat?"

"Well sexy; I've got a really strong tongue, hot foods and curries do not effect me in the slightest. Face it, you've lost! Fiery things will never beat me! Yahahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he began to eat the rest and looked like he was enjoying them.

Quana looked down at the five jalapeño's in front of her and gulped, she had never tried one but knew they were extremely hot and the hottest thing she could manage was a korma. She picked one up and prepared herself to take a bite. She hesitated for a moment and sighed.

"I can't do it." Said Quana bitterly. "There is no way I could beat Kasimar at eating something this hot."

"Very well then." Smirked Chris. "Pig Out or Puke is now _over_! With his extremely strong tongue and immunity to hot foods

…

…

…

Kasimar has won it for Team Grenade!"

"Yeah!" Cheered Kasimar. "I win! You lost! Yahaha!"

Nobody cheered for the bully with made him frown.

"Hey; why aren't you applauding me? I won!" Snarled Kasimar.

"True … but we all hate you." Explained Mable.

Kasimar growled as Chris continued to speak.

"Team Grenade have come first once more which means immunity and a special prize." Said Chris with a smile at Kasimar's victory. "Today's prize is going to be

…

…

…

A selection box of the finest gourmet chocolates I could find. Think of it as a bit of mercy for eating such gross food."

"Well … I guess I could try the chocolate after all that's happened." Shrugged Mable.

"Team Puzzle … so close but once again no cigar! You get no prize but also win immunity." Said Chris.

Team Puzzle said nothing as they were quite concerned for Spider's well being.

"And Team Jungle; you guys suck!" Laughed Chris. "Pick your favorite loser and meet me at the Bonfire Ceremony in two hours. Until then you can all do as you wish … and you are now allowed to puke into the toilets if you want."

The campers arose and left the mess hall after the horrible challenge while Chris smirked to himself.

"An allergic reaction and Kasimar winning; this is going to bring in such good ratings! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

Uzuri yawned as she woke up and got to her feet.

"What did I miss?" She asked completely sober.

"Your team lost." Replied Chris. "You can do whatever you want until the Bonfire ceremony is two hours."

Uzuri left the mess hall to go to her cabin; possibly to see Vinnie. Chris just shook his head.

"What a freak."

* * *

**Confessional: But I wanted Quana to win!**

**Kasimar: Too easy; that wasn't such a bad challenge … sure, I feel sick and the food was crap … but I won and the losers known as my teammates will keep me around because of it. If they still want me gone I'm sure Tabitha could be of assistance. This game just gets better and better. Yahahaha!**

* * *

A while later Quana sat on the steps of her cabin feeling gloomy; she had lost to Kasimar. Sure, her team was safe from elimination but Spider could be in real trouble. Part of her wanted to go and see him to tell him how she felt but her other part told her he probably didn't feel the same way.

"What should I do?" Asked Quana to herself.

Barney walked up and sat down next to her looking glum and anxious as well.

"Ahoy Quana; how's it going?" Asked Barney.

"Not very well; Spider's had an allergic reaction hasn't he? He could be in real pain from it." Said Quana sadly. "I'm not sure what to do."

"I feel similar; he's a really good friend of mine. I don't know who did this but I swear a pirate vendetta on the peg legged culprit." Said Barney crossly before frowning. "Still; maybe Chris did this."

"Even Chris wouldn't sink that low." Said Quana. "But I do wonder sometimes."

The two sat in silence for a few minutes looking up at the darkening sky.

"Quana; I have something I need to tell you." Said Barney after a while; he looked pretty serious.

"What is it Barney? Do you know who did it?" Asked Quana.

"If only I did. No, I don't." Sighed Barney. "I'm going to tell you something spider wanted to tell you earlier. Remember earlier in the challenge Spider was about to tell you something but got interrupted and said he'd tell you after the challenge … right?"

"Yes; I remember." Nodded Quana.

"Would you like to know what it was?" Asked Barney with a look of full seriousness and maturity.

"I would like to; it seemed quite important." Said Quana as she focused her attention on Barney so she didn't miss anything."

"Ok … … Spider loves you." Said Barney calmly.

Quana's heart did a back flip and her chest heated up.

"He loves me?" Said Quana softly.

"Yes; he's infatuated with you savvy? He has been since around day six. And … well … I've been trying to hook you two up by teaching Spider how to woo you." Explained Barney. "But now that all this has happened he may not get the chance to tell you."

"So … is it just a crush or is he truly in love with me?" Asked Quana as he cheeks started to turn red which Barney didn't notice.

"Definitely the latter; why do you think he always stands up for you when Kasimar upsets you yaaar?" Smiled Barney before sighing. "I just … thought I'd let you know in case Spider gets voted off by default."

Quana was silent; Spider loved her? So … they both felt the same way about each other and all this time she had been oblivious to his feelings. Quana thought for a moment and got up.

"Where are you going?" Asked Barney.

"I'm going to see Spider." Said Quana with a smile and a blush.

As Quana quickly left for the medical tent Barney smiled to himself.

"I feel like I've done a pretty good deed. Good job me." Said Barney with a big smile.

* * *

**Confessional: I sense a heartwarming moment about to arrive.**

**Barney: The world we live in needs more love yaaaar. It makes to happy to know two of my best friends are in love with each other. What can I say yaaaar; I'm a bit of a wee softie at times. You've done good Barney … you've done good.**

* * *

Spider lay on top of the covers on one of the beds in the medical tent. He felt like crap; Chef had given him an injection which had eased the pain and made him feel a little letter though he doubted he'd be back to his normal self for a day or two. Spider wished this hadn't happened; now he'd probably never get to tell Quana how he felt about her.

"I guess I'm just not supposed *cough* to find anyone." Said Spider sadly. He had accepted years ago he'd never find anybody but then … he met Quana. She made him feel special even with his many flaws.

"Well; this whole experience *cough* will probably be over *sneeze* soon." Sighed Spider as he stared up at the ceiling.

"Spider; are you ok?" Said a voice from the doorway.

Spider looked up and saw Quana standing at the doorway looking at him in worry.

"I'm ok … well; I could be better *cough* so … I'm not really *cough* ok." Said Spider as Quana walked into the medical tent and stood by the side of Spider's bed. "What are you doing *cough* here?"

"I've come to see if you are alright; I was so worried about you. You looked like you were dying." Said Quana kindly as she looked at spider with a smile. "But at least you look a little better now."

"Thanks; this whole competition has *cough* been the most fun, scary and *cough* odd thirteen days of my life." Said Spider as Quana say down on a chair beside his bed. "Shame its *sneeze* ended really."

"What do you mean?" Asked Quana.

"Well; we lost *gag* didn't we? And I've surely been voted *cough* off … well; it's probably for the *sneeze* best." Said Spider sadly yet acceptingly.

"No Spider; you're still in the contest." Said Quana warmly. "Team Jungle lost though we came second as Kasimar won."

"So … I'm *cough* still in?" Said Spider in surprise.

"Yep; and I wouldn't have it any other way." Said Quana with a kind and loving smile.

The two teens were both silent for a moment before Spider spoke.

"Quana … there's something I *cough* really want to tell you." Said Spider nervously.

"I have something to tell you as well Spider." Said Quana with a lush.

"You see." Said Spider before pausing."

"I kinds." Began Quana.

Another short silence arose before Spider and Quana both spoke at the same time.

"I really love you." Said Spider and Quana simultaneously. Spider looked shocked as his cheeks turned bright red.

"You love *cough* me?" Said Spider both weakly and happily.

"Yes; very much." Smiled Quana in embarrassment. "And you love me too; Barney told me."

"What a true *cough* friend." Said Spider with a chuckle. "But … why do you *cough* love _me_? Someone as *gag* beautiful, popular and great as you could *cough* do so much better."

"I can name a lot of reasons." Said Quana as she counted on her fingers. "You're so nice, you're polite, you stand up for those you care about, you always try your best, you're very humble and lovable … and you're really handsome in my eyes."

"Really?" Blushed Spider. "I don't … know what *cough* to say."

"How about you love me too." Giggled Quana with a blush. "Come on spider; say it."

"Ok … I love you *cough* Quana." Said Spider while feeling as though his heart had stopped.

"You know Spider if you really felt this way about me … why didn't you just tell me?" Asked Quana curiously.

"I was too nervous *cough* and I was afraid of rejection." Admitted Spider.

"I'd never reject anyone as delightful and lovely as you." Replied Quana.

The two teens looked at each other lovingly for a moment before slowly leaning in and sharing a tender and passionate kiss on the lips.

"_I mustn't cough, I mustn't cough_." Thought Spider as he kissed Quana. "_Wow; her lips taste really sweet_."

"_Whoa; he's a really good kisser_." Thought Quana as she kissed Spider.

A few moments later they parted and blushed.

"So … will you be *cough* my girlfriend?" Asked Spider shyly.

"Only if you'll be my boyfriend." Replied Quana with a smile.

"Deal." Chuckled Spider.

Quana slowly climbed up onto the bed so she was beside Spider; both the two new lovers smiled at each other and hugged.

"It may sound cliché *cough* but I never want this *cough* moment to end." Said Spider.

"I feel exactly the same." Said Quana as the two began to cuddle; Spider made extra effort to not cough and he was succeeding.

"Hey Spider; I've got you a get well card." Said Jimmy as he entered the medical tent only to stop where he was when he saw what Spider and Quana were doing; the two teens looked up and blushed in embarrassment.

"I'll … just leave it here." Said Jimmy as he put the card on a table and quickly left the medical tent.

* * *

**Confessional: Somebody pass the tissues; that was … soooooooo romantic!**

**Spider: **(He is smiling widely). **I've got a ***cough*** girlfriend … THIS IS THE BEST DAY ***hard cough* **OF MY LIFE!**

**Quana: **(She is smiling and blushing bright red). **Spider seems like the perfect guy; I think despite everything this has all worked out perfectly. And boy; he's a good kisser; Hahaha! Yep; I'm so glad I signed up for this show.**

**Jimmy: **(He looks embarrassed). **I probably should have knocked.**

* * *

Team Jungle, or what was left of it, was seated on stumps around the bonfire later that night. Vinnie, Tabitha and Uzuri looked disappointed or angry that they had lost somewhat unfairly. Uzuri had sincerely apologized that she had caused there loss but Tabitha and Vinnie had reassured her that it wasn't her fault.

"I don't know how we are going to win challenges after this." Said Vinnie from his stump. "Two members against the other teams five is going to make it pretty hard."

"We'll fine a way." Said Tabitha. "Whichever two of us survive."

"I wish we could all go through." Said Uzuri sadly.

Chris arrived and stood behind his oil drum with a tray of just two marshmallows. He set them down and laughed at the three members of Team Jungle.

"You guys are officially the worst team in the history of Total Drama!" Sneered Chris. "You've lost a total of six challenges; no other team has been left with only two before the merge! Haha!"

"Its your fault we lost because you got Uzuri drunk." Said Tabitha angrily.

"Whatever." Scoffed Chris as he picked up both of the marshmallows on the tray. "When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe … though probably not for much longer. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back … ever."

"We know how this whole thing works Chris; get on with it." Said Vinnie as he crossed his arms.

"Ok fine, whatever." Said Chris idly. "The two of you who are going through tonight are…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

None of you."

The three campers were stunned and Tabitha looked very angry.

"What? You're eliminating all of us?" Asked Tabitha angrily.

"That's not fair." Said Uzuri crossly.

"No; I'm not kicking you all off … its just that we had an unusual occurrence in the voting tonight." Explained Chris. "Thanks to a certain one of you … there was a tie."

"Really?" Asked Vinnie. "I don't think that has happened before."

"It hasn't. You see; Vinnie, you voted for Tabitha, Tabitha … you voted for Vinnie. And Uzuri … you idiot! You voted for yourself!"

"I didn't want to vote my friends off." said Uzuri meekly.

"Well … I know how we can solve this little problem." Said Chris before smiling sadistically. "I'll just boot of the camper I like the least of you three. So Uzuri … you're out!"

"What?" Growled Vinnie. "But that's not fair!"

"Too bad; life isn't." Sneered Chris.

"How could you be so prejudice; this is a new low for you Chris." Snarled Vinnie.

"Oh shut up; Uzuri is out and you and Tabitha are through, you should be happy."

"Chris; this is just wrong." Said Tabitha angrily. She cared not for Uzuri's feelings but that she was losing her ally. "Why don't we just vote again?"

"No can do Tabitha; either Uzuri goes … or one of you two goes instead." Said Chris sadistically.

There was silence for a moment; suddenly before Chris could continue Vinnie spoke up.

"Ok then; I'll go." Said Vinnie calmly.

Chris was stunned.

"What? Are you retarded or something?" Said Chris with a laugh. "You're giving up a million dollars for that freak?"

"To me Uzuri is worth more than a million." Replied Vinnie sternly. "And I don't like it when you call her a freak!"

"Ok, fine. Touchy." Said Chris. "Anyway; Vinnie is hereby out and Tabitha and Uzuri are through."

Chris tossed the marshmallow to the two girls and glanced at Vinnie.

"Time for you to walk the dock of shame Vinnie." Said Chris dryly.

"Well; goodbye girls; keep going as long as you can ok. Don't let Kasimar win." Said Vinnie with a smile. "And Uzuri … I'll miss you."

Vinnie gave Uzuri a hug and walked towards the dock of shame.

"Finally; I thought he'd never leave." Said Chris in relief. "Its getting later and I'm tired!"

Chris turned to the two girls.

"Well girls … it's just the two of you left." Said Chris somberly before smiling. "But thankfully for you two weaklings there's going to be a merge VERY soon, tomorrow to be exact. So … goodnight."

Chris left the Bonfire area as Uzuri turned to Tabitha.

"Vinnie gave up his chance at a million dollars for me." Said Uzuri sounding very touched.

"He's not gone yet; if you're fast you can still say goodbye to him." Smiled Tabitha.

"Good idea Tabitha; see you in a while!" Said Uzuri as she quickly ran to the dock of shame to catch up to Vinnie.

* * *

**Confessional: What sportsmanship.**

**Tabitha: Well; the least I could do is make sure they get a proper farewell, it's going to benefit me anyway … ands I don't want Uzuri disturbing me with crying!**

* * *

Vinnie walked down the dock of shame feeling proud that he had done the right thing yet a little sad he no longer had a chance at the million dollars. But Uzuri was still in the competition and that was what mattered the most.

"Vinnie!" Called a girly and slightly childish voice from behind him.

Vinnie turned and was instantly embraced in a tight hug by Uzuri. He hugged her back and smiled.

"Hey Uzuri; you ok?" Asked Vinnie.

"I'm fine … but I just wanted to give you a proper goodbye." Said Uzuri sweetly. "That was such a nice thing you did for me; nobody has ever done something even remotely close to that for me before."

"Well; I didn't want you to leave, you're far more important to me than a million dollars." Said Vinnie modestly.

"I'm really going to miss you." Said Uzuri a little sadly. "You're the most kind and caring person I've ever met!"

"Well don't worry about me; just keep on going; I'll be rooting for you." Smiled Vinnie at his girlfriend. "And I'll be with you all the way once you get to the finals."

"Thank you." Blushed Uzuri before grinning slyly. "Here's something to remember me by."

Uzuri embraced Vinnie again and kissed him passionately for a few seconds; Vinnie returned the kiss and when they pulled apart they were smiling.

"Farewell Uzuri; and good luck." Said Vinnie as he climbed aboard the boat of losers which sped off into the night.

"Goodbye Vinnie!" Called Uzuri as she waved until Vinnie was out of sight. She smiled to herself and turned to go back to her cabin.

After Uzuri left Chris walked onto the dock of shame.

"I thought they were going to be here all night; I have important things to do you know." Said Chris with a frown before forcing on a smile. "And that ends day thirteen and the team stage of the competition; Vinnie is the last voted off before the merge and Spider and Quana have hooked up. What will happen on day fourteen? Will anything interesting happen? Will we see some voted off campers? And will anyone return to the Island? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

The boat of losers docked at the Playa Des Losers; Vinnie got off feeling a little disappointed he lost. But he knew in his heart he had done the right thing.

"So this is Playa Des losers is it?" Said Vinnie to himself. "Well; I may as well do the first thing on my to do list."

"Hi Vinnie." Said a voice a short distance away.

Vinnie looked in the direction of the voice and silently meeped. Fifi was walking up to him.

"_Looks like my karma has arrived_." Gulped Vinnie.

"Fifi; I just want to say I am extremely sorry for how I was to you. I was a complete condescending prick and I'm really truly sorry." Said Vinnie quickly.

Fifi chuckled, something Vinnie hadn't been expecting.

"You don't have to apologize to me Vinnie, even though I appreciate it." Smiled Fifi. "I've been waiting for you because I have been wanting to apologize to you for being so … well … sexist and discriminatory to you."

"Its ok, I forgive you … I probably deserved it anyway looking back on it." Admitted Vinnie.

"To be honest I was mean to you in particular because … you look kind of like a guy from my home town who is completely sexist and horrible. I shouldn't have been like I was." Said Fifi before smiling. "Being sexist to men spread a bit of a bad name for the feminist community. And just so you know … I have completely renounced my sexist beliefs."

"And I hereby renounce my, well, jerkass Attitude." Smiled Vinnie.

"You know Vinnie; what you did just then was really unselfish and inspiring. You gave up your own chance at the money so Uzuri could stay. That was … a _really_ nice thing to do." Said Fifi admiringly.

"So; does this mean our conflict is over and we're friends?" Asked Vinnie with a hopeful smile. "I'd like it to be that way.

"Of course it does." Nodded Fifi as the two began to walk up to the resort hotel. "I'll show you to your room … oh, and you might want to get up early because Patch can make the buffet vanish in six seconds flat."

"That somehow doesn't surprise me." Said Vinnie as he and his new friend laughed.

* * *

Votes

Tabitha- Vinnie

Uzuri- Uzuri

Vinnie- Tabitha

Vinnie- 1 (Left by choice)

Tabitha- 1

Uzuri- 1

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie.

Vinnie is gone and in a very selfless way; what's more, he and Fifi have buried the hatchet and are now friends. On top of that Spider and Quana have FINNALLY hooked up and Barney has succeeded in his mission. Kasimar may have won this challenge but can he last all the way? Probably not, but maybe…

Next Time: It's a search around Playa Des Losers for Chris's hair gel for a chance to return to the competition. You can expect Wallace to cheat, but that's nothing new!


	30. Day 14, Part 1, Happy Hair Gel Hunting

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, action or the Season That Must Never Be Named; they belong to Cartoon Network and Teletoon. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his all round fantastic story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would much prefer it if you, yes YOU, didn't steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains a sadistic and nasty host, hair related discrimination, plastic explosive, extreme bullying and a marker pen. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana** BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Poll:** There is a new poll; vote for who your favorite antasgonist of total drama Letterz is. I want to know which villain is the best in the opinion of my fans so give it a vote if you have time.

**Note:** We've just about reached the halfway point, feels good doesn't it. Thank you to everyone who has been reading since the beginning and let me tell you … the drama is JUST getting started. In this episode three campers are going to return to the competition either to your delight or chagrin depending on who does. Also this episode may have a chance of being the shortest … not my much but I just thought I'd let you all know.

Also from now on I will be revealing a new camper for T.D.L.2 per chapter in case you haven't noticed yet. You will find them on my deviantart page which is linked to from my account page here. Here's the line up so far…

Tyson- The Cool Rocker

Winnie- The Excitable Cat lover

Lankston- The Condescending one.

Rheneas- The Rebellious Pyromaniac.

And now without further ado; on with the chapter.

Oh! And Total Drama Letterz now had ... OVER four thousand hits! Thanks for everyone who has helped me get so many; next milestone, ten thousand!

Sit back and enjoy the show!

* * *

Chris was standing on the Dock of Shame looking out at the sea. It was morning and the birds, raccoons and less than savory animal residents of Wawanakwa were already up and about. Parked next to the dock was a jet ski; it was blue and turquoise and had Chris's name painted on very finely. Chris threw up his arms and smiled for the camera.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was time to really bring back the grossness this show is known for, by that I mean puking and barfing … which come to think of it are the exact same thing. But anyway! It was day thirteen and the challenge was another gross eating competition called Pig Out or Puke, the later of which many campers did. We had vomit, cheating, more vomit and a whole lot of drama."

"This challenge was going to be even worse for the campers than the brunch of disgustingness ever could be and the food they had to eat sure proved that. Toenails, expired lemons, jalapeño's and bacon fat cubes, it was all really gross! Haha!"

"The first to go was Xaria after the olive dish; maybe she hates them or perhaps she has a weak stomach. Either way she was the first one out. And so it continued, camper after camper vomited and had to sit at the loser table. Team Jungle was at a disadvantage by now due to having only a measly three members as opposed to Team Puzzle and Team Grenade's totals of five. But maybe fate was to smile on them this time around; it sure would if Tabitha had anything to say about it, haha!"

"Tabitha had heard of Spider's extreme allergy to apples and as I learnt from camera footage she spiked all the bug juice drinks with apple juice in order to knock Spider out of the competition. And when the bug juice was served Spider suffered an allergic reaction and looked pretty injured. I would have kept him there until the4 end of the challenge but Quana, the mouthy singer who for some odd reason loves spider, screamed at me to help him and she very evilly kneed me in the playpen AND punched me in the face! What nerve that bitch has! Chef took Spider to the medical tent and the challenge continued."

"Thanks to an earlier beer drink the campers were served Uzuri got drunk and went, for lack of a better word, stark raving bazonkas. She was nuts! But her drunken state seemed to make her immune to the disgusting effect of the dishes. While Vinnie and Tabitha were both gone Uzuri kept on going. Impressive for a freak."

"In the end it came down to Kasimar, the best contestant _ever_, Quana, driven by her feelings for Spider … and Uzuri, who was completely drunk. Uzuri lost it for Team Jungle after falling asleep and not finishing the meal she was served. It came down to a showdown between Kasimar and Quana."

"Fortunately the next dish _just happened_ to be raw jalapeño's; Kasimar ate them with no problems whatsoever due to his immunity to spicy hot foods. Quana knew she was beaten due to being more of a korma person and forfeited. Thus Team Grenade won first place but Team Puzzle were still spared from elimination."

"Between then and the Bonfire Ceremony Barney and Quana talked to each other and Barney told her that Spider loved her, gag! Quana decided to pay the poor sick boy a little visit in the medical tent. To my disappointment they confessed how they felt about each other and hooked up. I guess love really is blind judging by the couples that have hooked up thus far in this contest."

"At the Bonfire Ceremony an unusual occurrence, errm, occurred. It was a three way tie because Vinnie voted for Tabitha, Tabitha voted for Vinnie and Uzuri, being mentally retarded, voted for herself. I had to break the tie somehow and I decided to boot Uzuri as, lets face it, we don't want a shorty sadist on the show."

"But sadly Vinnie foiled my plans. For reasons I cannot begin to understand he went in Uzuri's place so Uzuri could stay. Seriously; he gave up a million dollars for LOVE of all things. What is humanity coming to these days? Well; it broke the tie I guess so Vinnie was the one to walk the dock of shame. Uzuri however managed to kiss him goodbye. Freaks."

"But today we're not going to be on Wawanakwa; we're heading to Playa Des Losers to see the fourteen campers who have been eliminated at this point and to bring three of them back into the game. Who is going to be coming back to Wawanakwa?"

"Reformed Feminist Fifi?"

"Plucky no longer shy girl Raven?"

"Mr. Stuffs-his-face Patch?"

"Tattling Teachers Pet Daisy?"

"Over-The-Top Villain Wallace?"

"Crippled Chef Gary?"

"Scare Baby Carlton?"

"Hair Obsessed Libby Nakia?"

"Recently Voted Off Vinnie?"

"Tree Hugger Irene?"

"Smart Guy Hector?"

"Dull Swimmer Hector?"

"Or Space Fan Andy?"

"Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

The cameraman turned off the camera as Chris climbed onto the jet-ski and sped off towards Playa des losers.

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

It was such a lovely day at Playa Des Losers; the aqua blue swimming water in the swimming pools, the delicious buffets, the nick nack gift shop … yep, it sure was a stark contrast to the craphole known as Wawanakwa Island.

Currently the fourteen voted off campers were relaxing around the pool area of the playa. Yessica was swimming around in the pool, Irene was tending to a plant and seemed puzzled about something, Patch was pigging out on the buffet, Andy was sitting at the pool bar with Zita, both were drinking cola, Vinnie and Fifi were both sunbathing on fold out deck chairs, Carlton was on the lowest diving board, the one that was a mere single centimeter above the water, and was trying to pluck up the courage to jump, Gary and Raven were talking to each other, Gary was parked by the hot tub while Raven was relaxing in it. Nakia was brushing her hair and getting a tan on a deck chair, Hector was sitting in a deck chair with plate of prawn toast and appeared to be reading the encyclopedia, Daisy was reading an English textbook and finally Wallace was just chuckling to himself in the shade under a palm tree.

"This is the life." Said Vinnie as he relaxed in the warm sunshine. "The painful competition is over for me and I can just relax."

"You said it; my stay on the island may have been short but I much prefer it here than there … though I could have used a million dollars." Agreed Fifi.

"I could have as well; but I think Uzuri is worth more than a million." Replied Vinnie. "I like what you've done with your hair today."

"Thanks." Smiled Fifi. "The afro just felt a bit … ridiculous so I thought I'd let it down."

Fifi's hair was still pink with two black streaks but now that it was let down it went down to past her shoulders and was silky and smooth; like Nakia's hair in a way.

"But seeing the reruns … wow." Said Vinnie as he frowned darkly. "How could Tabitha do all that … and how could I not sense it?"

"She wears the mask well." Shrugged Fifi. "But its karma, she'll get hers eventually."

"I'm hoping for sooner rather than later." Said Vinnie. "And her calling Uzuri a freak and giving Spider an allergic reaction … that's awful."

"She just happens to be good at lying." Said Fifi with a sigh as she sat up. "Still; not all is lost, Chris might return some of us at some point, and then we tell everyone so it'll be buh bye Tabitha."

"I like your thinking; sounds like a plan." Agreed Vinnie.

A short distance away Irene was looking impatiently at the plant in the pot she was tending to.

"I just don't get it." Said Irene out loud.

"What don't you get?" Asked Yessica as she swam up.

"This plant isn't growing and its been three days since I've planted it. I've sang to it, I've whispered sweet nothings and I've even watered it with my own tears … what could I be doing wrong?" Asked Irene.

"Maybe you're just not giving it enough time to grow." Guessed Yessica. "Plants love to take their time."

"Can plants swim?" Asked Wallace as he walked up.

"No; why?" Asked Irene suspiciously.

"Because its about to!" Cackled Wallace as he kicked the plant pot and sent it and the plant into the water.

"You jerk!" Snarled Irene. "Why did you do that?"

"Because … I'm evil! Mwuhahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace like a maniac.

"I don't know how everyone could possibly put up with you for ten days." Growled Irene. "Get here you! I'll avenge my tree by giving you a wedgie!"

"Catch me if you can goody two shoes! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he took off running at quite a speed with Irene following behind angrily.

Carlton walked by and glanced at the plant in the water before screaming.

"Aaaaargh! Dirty water is so scary!" Whimpered Carlton. "It can cause cholera!"

Yessica climbed out of the water and sighed.

"Carlton; you don't need to be scared of the dirty water; as long as you don't drink it you'll be fine." Said Yessica to try and comfort the scaredy cat teen. "And when Kasimar gets here you'll need to be able to be brave."

"Kasimar is coming? AAAAAARGH!" Wailed Carlton as he ran away screaming.

Yessica blinked and sighed.

"I don't know why I try sometimes." Mumbled the blond swimmer.

"Hellooooooooooo ex campers!" Greeted Chris as he walked in the Playa Des Losers resort. He was met with foul glances and frowns.

"What do you want Chris?" Asked Zita with a glare. "Here to rub in our loss? Or maybe taunt us that we have no chance of winning the money? Or maybe you're here to give us more torture and humiliation?"

"All of those are very good and fun ideas." Chuckled Chris. "But no; I'm not here for that this time."

"So what do you want?" Asked Hector as he looked up from his copy of the encyclopedia.

"I'm here to give you a … … second chance at the million!" Said Chris with a smirk.

All the campers stopped what they were doing; even Irene stopped chasing Wallace to listen to this announcement. Chris had done it again; he had gotten the campers attention.

"See; the way I see it; you are all here because you were voted off and now are out of the game … correct?" Asked Chris.

"Well duh!" Said Nakia. "Though I say my team made a mistake voting me off that night. Notice they've not got a number advantage?"

"I have no regrets in voting for you." Shrugged Andy indifferently.

"I'll have to agree with Andy there." Agreed Zita.

"I was voted off unfairly." Said Daisy snootily. "I would have led whatever team I was on to victory after victory."

"How exactly was it unfair?" Asked Wallace as he walked back to where he was before. "You got the most votes didn't you?"

"Shut it!" Snapped Daisy.

"Say whatever you please; words aren't the biggest evil … guns are! Mwahahahahaahha!" Smirked Wallace.

"Can we get the attention back to me ... where it belongs?" Whined Chris childishly. "As I was saying; you fourteen are losers … but by the end of today only eleven of you are going to be true losers."

"You mean." Said Fifi before trailing off in delight.

"You got it; three of you will be returning." Nodded Chris which raised the excitement of almost everyone in the vicinity tenfold.

"Another chance at the million? Excellent!" Said Irene genkily.

"Oh no!" Wailed Carlton. "I don't want to go back to that big scary island! Let me stay here!"

"No can do Carlton; all of you are going to participate in this challenge whether you like it or not." Smirked Chris sadistically as always.

"I don't see how this challenge is going to be very fair, whatever it is." Said Gary as he wheeled over with Raven walking beside him on crutches in her purple one piece bikini. "In case you haven't noticed it yet, me and Raven are kind of injured."

"You wound me Gary." Mocked Chris. "But I did notice it … and I didn't care! Haha! But … don't you want to get back in the contest?"

"Of course I do." Said Gary with determination. "I have a score to settle with Tabitha and Kasimar; I'll leave them with tire tracks on over eighty five percent of their bodies!"

"I love it when you talk tough Gary." Giggled Raven.

"Not that he is tough; he's as wimpy as a girl!" Laughed Chris.

"Continue that sentence … I _dare_ you." Said Fifi evilly with a glare.

"Never mind!" Whimpered Chris like the meek sniveling coward he was. "Anyway; does anybody actually want to know what the challenge is?"

"Well I'm waiting to know but you don't seem to be telling us." Said Hector. Most of the other ex contestants chuckled while Chris growled as a vein became visible on his forehead.

"Shut up fatso!" Growled Chris while stomping his feet like a toddler not getting any ice cream. "I'll tell you the challenge if you all just shut the #bleep# up!"

The former campers were silent but most of them looked amused at Chris's pathetic immaturity.

"Ok; as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted, today the twelve campers still in the competition are getting a small break as a reward for making it to the merge. But the rest of you are going to compete for a chance to get back in the game. Today you are going to be searching for a very valuable treasure … any guesses as to what it is?" Asked Chris while reaching behind himself.

"A gold bar?" Guessed Raven.

"A pie?" Said Patch with a burp and a fart.

"A security blanket?" Said Carlton hopefully.

"The Mean Machine?" Guessed Wallace. "It was obviously the best car in the show."

"Hair gel." Said Nakia confidently.

"Right you are Nakia." Nodded Chris much to everyone else's surprise.

"Wait; Nakia actually got something right?" Said Andy in surprise. "I didn't think that was possible … but then again it is hair related."

Chris held his hand from behind him back into the camper's view and he was holding a plastic container of hair gel that was colored gold and had a picture of his face stuck onto it.

"You will be looking for three pots of Maclean gel hidden around the Playa Des Losers." Explained Chris. "Once you locate one all you have to do is bring it back here and then cross the finish line over there and Booya, you're back in the game."

Chris gestured to the dock area of the Playa where a black and white checkered line of tape had been placed.

"Yep; its that easy … but only three of you are going to win this. Oh; and stealing the hair gel from another person is completely within the rules and I would actively encourage it as I just _love_ catfights! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

"Are we allowed to work in teams?" Asked Vinnie.

"Yes; in fact, it is actually a requirement. Each of you is going to be working in groups of three; fourteen is an easily dividable number by three." Said Chris in satisfaction.

"Chris … how many times does fourteen divide by three five times?" asked Daisy with a sneer. "Its impossible! You can only get four threes into fourteen with a remainder of two."

"Boy; I do not know how well this challenge was thought through." Said Zita with an amused shake of her head.

Chris blinked and realized his mistake and growled.

"Stop upstaging me!" Whined Chris pathetically. "I guess that just means that they'll be a group of two."

"Err … no." said Daisy smugly. "I'm working by myself; none of these people could possibly be even half good enough to work with me."

"Looks like somebody else is going to have to work by himself or herself then." Shrugged Chris. "Ok; everyone get into your groups and get ready to start searching."

Wallace quickly approached Patch and Carlton.

"Come my minions; the three of us will rule this contest and get back in the game for the million! Mwuhahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

"I don't know … I'm scared of the number one million." Shivered Carlton.

"What in it for me?" Asked Patch as he stuffed his face with a pie from the buffet.

"Well; what do you two want?" Asked Wallace curiously.

"Food." Said Patch.

"A nice safe teddy bear." Said Carlton with a shudder of fright.

"Well boys; stick with me and you'll have all the food and teddy bears you could ever want." Promised Wallace with a smirk.

Patch belched and nodded dumbly. Carlton thought for a moment and gulped.

"I don't think this is such a good idea." Said Carlton as he shook Wallace's hand hesitantly.

Irene and Yessica had already teamed up and were wondering who their third member.

"Who do you think would be most useful to have in our group Irene?" Asked Yessica.

"Hmmm … how about Hector?" Suggested Irene. "He's kinda smart so he'll be a good help."

"You called." Said hector as he walked up. "Were you talking about letting me join you?"

"It depends … would you like to?" Asked Irene.

"I would; we'll find that useless hair gel and get back into the game where we can expose Tabitha." Said Hector. "I never did much like manipulative popular brats."

"Neither do I Hector." Agreed Yessica. "She played us like a Playstation."

"Then its settles; go Team Rain Forest!" Cheered Irene.

Andy and Zita shook hands sealing their status as a team.

"Well Zita; I think you and I could easily win this; you have all those thief skills and I am a fast runner and have some logic; I think we stand a good chance." Said Andy to his former team mate.

"Right on Andy." Agreed Zita. "I don't really think this'll be much of a contest … though we may have to watch out for Wallace; he always cheats."

"He was the reason I was voted off so we mustn't let him get back in the game." Concurred Andy. "Now who should we have as a third member?"

"Anybody but Nakia is fine by me." Shrugged Zita. "Got any preferences?"

Andy looked around the area and seized up the people who hadn't gotten into groups yet. After a moment of thinking he made a decision.

"Hey Vinnie!" Called Andy to the Russian in descent teen.

"Need something Andy?" Asked Vinnie as he walked up.

"Would you like to work with me and Zita?" Offered Andy. "We'd make a great team; and once we're back in the game we can settle the score with Tabitha and Kasimar."

"Sounds good." Agreed Vinnie as he shook hands with Andy and Zita. "I'd like to have a serious _word_ with Tabitha."

"Wouldn't we all." Said Zita as she rubbed her hands together eagerly.

Gary and Raven had predictably teamed up but knew they were at a _slight_ disadvantage due to their injuries.

"I'd really like to get back in the game … but I don't see how it's going to happen." Sighed Gary regretfully. "I'm in a wheelchair and you're on crutches; winning this challenge seems like a long shot."

"More like a misfire." Corrected Raven with a small smile. "But we have a chance all the same; Chris won't have rigged this challenge right?"

"Hopefully; but I wouldn't count on complete fairness. Wallace is going to cheat, no doubt about it." Said Gary while glancing at the wannabe bad guy. "Still; even if we lose it won't be so bad, plenty of 'us' time at this wonderful resort."

"I like it here as well." Agreed Raven. "Though a second chance at the million would be great … and we need another person to work with as well."

"I might be able to help you there." Smiled Fifi as she walked up. "Almost everybody else has teamed up in threes so I'm available as a team mate."

"Welcome to the team." Smiled Raven. "Though it'll be hard due to the, umm, _condition_ that me and Gary are in."

"That doesn't matter to me." Said Fifi honestly. "I'm sure we'll overcome the obstacles. Besides; this isn't a very physically demanding challenge and the Playa has ramps and Elevators so it won't be too much of a problem."

"Why don't we call ourselves Team Revenge as each of us has a score to settle?" Joked Gary with at the same time a pinch of seriousness.

"Good idea Gary." Said Raven. "Now lets get that golden hair gel … I never thought I'd say those words in that order."

Nakia looked over the groups that has formed and put on a foul smile.

"So who wants to the lucky team to have the wonderful me and my even more wonderful hair?" Asked Nakia condescendingly.

"Pass!" Said Irene quickly.

"I rather team up with the boogieman." Whimpered Carlton.

"I'll have to pass on your 'generous' offer." Said Zita.

"No thank you." Said Fifi with a shake of her head.

"What?" Said Nakia in shock and anger. "But that means I'm all alone! How am I supposed to win without people doing my dirty work for me? I'm too pretty to have to _work_!"

"Welcome to the club of reality; we have jackets." Said Hector with a smirk.

Nakia just snarled darkly and drew a finger across her throat.

"Ok; has everyone decided teams yet?" Asked Chris while tapping his right foot impatiently. "I do have a busy life you know."

"I doubt that very much." Said Gary with a smirk.

"You have no proof." Whined Chris immaturely. "For all you know I could have a hot date with Marilyn Monroe!"

"…You do realize she's dead don't you?" Said Vinnie with a dubious raised eyebrow.

"Really? You just can't trust Wikipedia anymore." Sighed Chris before shaking his head and looking at the crowd. "Ok … go."

"Go what?" Asked Carlton. "Do you mean go home? I wanna go home so badly!"

"No! I mean go as in go look for hair gel to get back in the game; what are you all, retarded?" Barked Chris impatiently. "Those three understood what I meant!"

The teams turned and saw Andy, Zita and Vinnie running off speedily into the hotel. After the briefest second of silence every team began to quickly run off in different direction to search for the hair gel. Soon all the campers but Wallace, Patch and Carlton were gone.

"Aren't you going to, oh I don't know … look for the hair gel?" Asked Chris snarkly.

"Patience ugly one." Said Wallace as he reached into his leather jacket. "I have to 'tilt' the playing field in my advantage don't I?"

Chris looked like he had been shot in the head once Wallace called him ugly. Before he could say anything he saw Wallace putting a flat round silver gadget onto the floor near the finish line and pres a button on it.

"There we go." Said Wallace with a satisfied clap of his hands. "Everything is better with proximity bombs! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

"Gwuahahahagua!" Laughed Patch quite un-evilly.

"Don't embarrass yourself my 'shapely' minion." Sighed Wallace. "Oh; and Chris, I wouldn't recommend going near the bomb unless you like the idea of getting charred and blown into the air."

"I'm scared of getting blown into the air!" Whimpered Carlton. "In fact; I'm scared of the air!"

"Now come my minions; let us blow away the competition! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he and his motley crew took off towards the hotel.

As they got further away Chris heard Wallace say "And that isn't a metaphor boys; we're really gonna blow them away literally". Chris blinked and smirked as he took out a deck chair.

"This is gonna be so awesome!" Cackled Chris eagerly. "Oh I do hope somebody gets hurt! Haha!"

* * *

Irene, Yessica and Hector were searching around the arcade casino in the Playa building. So far they hadn't had any luck but they were persisting in their search.

"Found any hair gel yet you two?" Asked Irene as she peeked into the pockets of the snooker table.

"Not yet." Said Yessica as she looked inside a claw machine game; the rip offs you usually see at a carnival or arcade like what the team were in now. "You'd think Chris would put it in one of these in order to aggravate us."

"I would have suspected Chris would have done that as well." Agreed Hector. "It would have been a wasted attempt as I'm pretty good at those machines even if they are a con most of the time."

"But you can win so many cute plushies." Said Yessica as she gestured to the stuffed panda's and tigers in the machine. "I'd say that's a pretty good prize for a measly quarter."

"I guess so … but it takes a lot of skill to actually get one; and quarters don't grow on trees." Said Hector to reason his point.

"I just love trees! A money tree would be a welcome addition to my garden back home." Smiled Irene happily. "Though I'm starting to run out of places to plant everything. Maybe I could convince our neighbors to let me use some of their garden."

"I doubt they will." Said Yessica as she looked behind the card dealer's counter by solitaire table. "Hmm; no hair gel over here."

"Is there any aces over there?" Asked Hector. "Some say they can bring good fortune to the holder and we could probably use some good fortune."

"Who needs fortune when you've got nature?" Said Irene dreamily about her one and true love … trees.

"That's our Irene." Chuckled Yessica while Hector just nodded with a smile.

* * *

Fifi, Gary and Raven were looking around the food court for the hair gel. Currently they were in the kitchen searching through the cupboards for it but so far hadn't managed to find it. Gary, due to being in a wheelchair, couldn't help as much as he wanted to.

"I wish I could get out of this wheelchair." Sighed Gary regretfully. "I know my way around the kitchen great, I could surely be of some help. I've never felt so useless before in all my life."

Raven hobbled over to her boyfriend and gave him a comforting peck on the cheek.

"Don't belittle yourself Gary; just because you can't walk at the moment doesn't mean you're useless."

"What use do I have in my current position?" Asked Gary.

"Easy. Your wonderful personality hasn't been affected, you can still help us look plus people aren't going to steal from you due to your condition, it'd be morally wrong." Said Raven comfortingly. "And lest not forget that you can still cook just fine and even with your broken legs you can throw quite a punch; so Kasimar better watch out when the rematch arrives … and when it does I'll be fighting alongside you."

"Have you ever got into a fight before?" Asked Gary with a blush at the compliments.

"No … but I could learn how to." Smiled Raven.

"It warms my heart to see you two young lovers getting along so well." Said Fifi with a big smile. "It gives me hope that the future won't be full of all around sociopaths like Kasimar or manipulative bitch's like Tabitha, it'll have decent people like you two."

"Thanks Fifi." Smiled Gary. "You know, though I wouldn't have wanted Vinnie to go I kinda feel bad about voting for you on day two."

"What's done is done." Said Fifi with a shrug as she searched through the pantry and looked behind a bag of flour. "Besides; looking back on it I kinda had it coming with the way I was acting; I was way over the top and lashed out at everyone … but I've changed since then."

"And I like the change." Agreed Gary.

"As do I." said Raven as she opened a cupboard and leapt back in terror.

Inside the cupboard was a chicken eating prawn cocktail potato chips with a double barreled shotgun at its feet. The chicken looked at Raven and picked up the double barreled shotgun, it cocked the weapon and beckoned for her to close the cupboard door. Raven did so with her heart beating triple its normal speed.

"I think we should search somewhere else." Said Raven with a shiver.

Fifi and Gary had seen what just happened and quickly agreed.

"What was a chicken doing with a shotgun anyway?" Asked Gary in bewilderment as they exited the kitchen.

"I don't think I really want to know." Said Fifi nervously as she quietly closed the door behind them.

* * *

Andy, Zita and Vinnie had searched around outside but hadn't found anything; it seemed that the hair gel was all somewhere inside the building. They had been looking inside random rooms around the hotel and were currently looking around on the third floor. Most of the rooms up here were locked.

"Where could that hair gel be?" Asked Zita as they walked along. "We've checked twenty five rooms now; you'd think at least one of them would have had something in them."

"I don't think we're going to have much luck up here." Said Andy as he tried opening another door without success. "All of these doors are locked; maybe we should try the basement or something."

"Perhaps … but maybe we should try one more room." Said Vinnie as he stopped by another door, this one had the number eight two on it.

"Why not? We've got nothing to lose." Shrugged Zita.

Vinnie tried to open the door … much to Andy and Zita's surprise as well as his own it swung open, they immediately stepped in.

This room was decorated like the other bedrooms in the hotel; pastel green wall paper, a fair sized bed, a cupboard and wardrobe and a balcony. Unlike most others this one had a Colombo poster on the wall, the cupboard had a number of detective books and lying on the bed looking up from a Poirot book and looking at the three was Eddie.

"Can I help you?" Asked Eddie as he put the book aside and sat up.

"You have a room to sleep in?" Asked Andy.

"Well where else was I going to sleep? Detroit?" Asked Eddie rhetorically.

"Oh yeah; I never put much thought into where you and Sasha were staying." Shrugged Andy.

"So, what can I do for you or did you just barge in to ransack my collection of detective books?" Inquired Eddie.

"Well; we're looking for some golden hair gel for a bonus challenge Chris has given everyone." Explained Vinnie. "For every tub of it we bring to him one of us is back in the game, and there is enough around for all three of us."

"Speaking of which … why aren't you and Sasha in this challenge?" Asked Zita. "Don't you want to get in the game?"

"Chris told us about the challenge and taunted us about not being allowed; Sasha kicked him in the crotch." Stated Eddie with a smirk. "Nope; as we weren't contestants at the beginning of the contest this challenge isn't open to us."

"Ok; I guess there's no need to look in here. See you later." Said Vinnie as he and the others started to exit the room.

"Hang on guys; just because I'm not in the competition doesn't mean that I can't help you; take a look around … doesn't _something_ strike you as odd?" Asked Eddie with a smile.

Andy, Zita and Vinnie glanced around the room to see what Eddie meant but didn't see anything; Andy took a closer look and noticed something that he wondered how he hadn't noticed it before.

"Yeah, I do notice something." Nodded Andy. "Why does your fedora have a lump in it?"

"I was wondering if any of you would ever notice." Chuckled Eddie as he reached under his fedora and took out a tub of golden hair gel with Chris's face on it. "Chris gave this to me and told me to give it to the first people to find me. Here, catch."

Eddie tossed the hair gel to the trio and Andy caught it. With a nod Eddie turned back to his book.

"There you go; now, I'd make myself scarce if I were you, Chris is bound to reveal that you've got the hair gel over the intercom." Cautioned Eddie. "You should probably keep out of sight of everyone else; I don't think Daisy, Nakia and Wallace plan on playing fair."

"Thanks Eddie." Said Andy politely as he and the others left the room.

"Not a problem." Replied Eddie as he return to reading his book, "Murder on the Orient Express.

* * *

Daisy was looking around for the hair gel by herself, just how she liked it. She didn't need team mates holding her back; in Daisy's opinion she could have easily beaten all three teams of eight just by herself she was that arrogant. Daisy hadn't found the hair gel just yet and was growing irritated.

"Where is that stupid hair gel?" Asked Daisy aloud. "I want it! Grrrr; I'm surprised the others aren't abandoning their own hopes and dreams to help me. Well; they're not good enough for me anyway, delinquents the lot of them."

Daisy opened a door and after entering it she slammed it shut. She saw that she was in the library, a place anyone who was going to be successful would spend a lot of time in her opinion. Daisy checked behind the counter and saw nothing important to her so she continued searching.

"Where could that stupid F grade hair gel be?" Muttered Daisy grouchily.

She walked past a set of book shelves and saw Sasha sitting on a fluffy sofa in front of an unlit fireplace playing on her DS.

"Yes! Final lap; dodge the shell, avoid the banana peel. Dammit! Why does Bowser have to be so fast?" Said Sasha as she played Mario Kart.

"Though I don't expect an intelligent answer from you." Said Daisy rudely as she walked up. "I'd like you to tell me where the golden hair gel is so I can get back in the game!"

"Maaaaaaaybe I'll tell you and maaaaaybe I won't." Said Sasha in a sing song voice as she paused her game. "Someone like Andy, Gary or Raven I would help in a heartbeat … but you're kind of rude aaaand you didn't say please."

"I don't have to say please; in case you haven't notice I am Daisy Pauline Rose!" Snarled Daisy as she rounded the sofa and stared coldly into Sasha's eyes. "I'll ask you again; where is the hair gel? You and Eddie were hired by the higher ups for the aftermath so you both definetly know where it is … and as I don't know where Eddie is I'm gonna regrettably have to rely on a brain dead gamer like yourself."

Sasha didn't look afraid in the slightest and crossed her arms.

"I'm not 'brain dead', I'm a B student." Said Sasha in annoyance.

"Exactly!" Sneered Daisy before leaning to Sasha so their faces were but a mere inch apart. "I come from a very powerful family; you do what I say or you'll _regret_ it! I can have you expelled from your school!"

"Somehow I doubt that." Said Sasha dryly. "I might have helped you in the first place if you simply said 'please can you tell me where the hair gel is' in a nice voice … but you've worn out your welcome and I don't think I want to have any part in letting someone like _you_ back into the competition. I'm hoping for a kind and deserving winner like Spider, Jimmy or maybe Oscar."

"Fine; have it your way." Said Daisy stiffly as she walked away and behind the couch out of Sasha sight.

"Finally." Said Sasha in relief as she picked up her DS to continued the game.

Before she could un-pause the game she felt a grip tighten around her pony tail and she was yanked hard and yelped in pain. She was yanked more before being thrown against a book shelf. She looked up and saw Daisy looking down on her with a look of malice and smugness.

"I warned you." Said Daisy sweetly yet incredibly foully. "I _always_ get what I want … and I want the hair gel … so … WHERE IS IT?"

Sasha didn't respond; the teachers pet clearly had clearly become a few memory blocks short of a Playstation memory card. In response to this Daisy grabbed Sasha's pony tail again and yanked with all her might as Sasha yelped in great pain.

"We can do this aaaaaaall day you know." Smirked Daisy as she yanked again.

Sasha couldn't take the pain and managed to wail out the answer.

"It's under the cushion on the left side of the sofa." Said Sasha as a tear of pain exited her eye.

Daisy let go of Sasha and pushed her idly to the floor again as she quickly collected the hair gel.

"You see how easy it is to do exactly as I say?" Said Daisy nastily. "You grease the handles … and the door opens."

Daisy took her leave as Sasha got up from the floor and rubbed the sore spot on her head in pain.

"Owwwww…" Groaned Sasha as she sat up straight as she could. "That girl … she's lost her mind … she hasn't heard the last of this."

Sasha got up and sat back on the sofa; one hand was rubbing the tender spot around her ponytail gently. She began to think on how she could get Daisy back for this but sighed.

"Am I really that weak?" Asked Sasha. "So weak I couldn't fight back against Daisy?"

* * *

Wallace had led Patch and Carlton into the basement. Carlton was shivering in fear as they descended the steps. Wallace took note of this and sighed.

"Don't tell me. Let me guess … you're scared of the dark." Said Wallace dryly. "Am I right?"

"Yes!" Whimpered Carlton. "Monsters might eat us! They breed in the darkness!"

"As I am the type of cold hearted bad guy who treats his henchmen nicely … take this." Said Wallace as he reached into a pocket on his leather jacket and took out a cube of blue neon which illuminated the dark room very nicely and quickly banished the dark from sight.

Carlton quickly accepted the neon cube and looked a little more relaxed as a result. This was broken when Patch farted.

"Oh no!" Wailed Carlton. "Farts not only smell awful but they are so scary!"

"I don't smell anything." Said Wallace; he had cleverly put a peg on his nose to prevent himself from suffering. "Now; do either of you know why I have bought you into the basement?"

"For a pizza party?" Guessed Patch dumbly.

"To look through the boxes of old antique stuff?" Asked Carlton as he briefly relaxed and looked around. "I like antique things; they have quite a history to them."

"And hopefully they are cursed!" Grinned Wallace. "Mwahahahahahahaha! But no; those are not the reasons I bought you down here."

"Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh … so what was the reason?" Asked Patch as he began to munch on a chocolate bar.

"Easy; every good villain knows that all the treasures and knowledge you may seek is always kept in a warehouse sort of area, specifically the basement. It's always the same in the movies. That is why I have a big hunch that the hair gel is in the basement."

"So … should we start looking in the boxes?" Asked Carlton as he glanced around as if to make sure no monsters would jump out.

"No need my boy; it's obviously over there." Said Wallace as he pointed to a large safe built into one of the walls.

Wallace approached the safe and scanned it over.

"Hmmmmm; probably four inches thick; one in sixty nine million chance of guessing the combination … I think I know just how to open it." Smirked Wallace.

"How? With a bubble gum bomb?" Asked Patch as he scratched his butt.

"…No. We are going to use the most evil bomb of all! Plastic explosive! Mwahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically.

So with enough being said, Wallace took out a large block of plastic explosive and a time bomb. He set it on the vault door and a moment later a beeping was heard as Wallace quickly stood back behind a crate.

"Take cover you two!" Called Wallace.

Carlton didn't need telling twice and quickly screamed in terror and cowered behind a box while Patch calmly walked behind another box and burped.

(Insert REALLY big boom here)

When the dust cleared Wallace and his henchmen saw that the vault door now had a large hole in it; big enough for a car to get through. A crack was running up the wall and spreading along the ceiling.

"The wall looks unwell." Said Patch.

CRASH!

Part of the floor from above caved in and a large amount of flooring and wreckage fell down into the basement along with the sound of shrieking which promptly stopped a moment later.

Wallace entered the vault and he cackled in triumph at what he saw; inside was a single tub of golden hair gel with Chris's face on it. Wallace quickly picked it up and left the vault.

"Well my minions; we have no more business staying down here so lets get going." Said Wallace before noticing Carlton and Patch were looking over something in the wreckage. "What's got your attention boys?"

"Err … something." Said Patch before belching loudly.

"I don't think she'll be happy when he wakes up." Gulped Carlton.

"Who?" Asked Wallace as he walked up and looked at what his team mates were looking at. He promptly began laughing.

Lying unconscious on the rubble after falling from above was Nakia; her hair didn't even look messed up and she still had a mean look to her even when asleep.

"Mwahahahahahaha! Bonus!" Cackled Wallace. "We get the hair gel AND harm an innocent bystander as well!

"Maybe we should leave before she wakes up." Whimpered Carlton.

"Nonsense my boy; I know exactly what evil deed to do when she's like this.

"What deed is that?" Asked Patch dumbly.

"A very evil one indeed." Cackled Wallace as he took out a black marker pen and got to his knees beside Nakia. "Let's draw a mustache on her face! Mwuhahahahahaha!"

* * *

Chris was sitting in a deck chair by the finish line soaking up the sun and had been watching the antics, triumphs and fights all through a special monitor system the poorly paid interns had set up.

"This is better than cable!" Laughed Chris. "This episode is going great and we don't even have Kasimar."

Chris turned to a camera that had been set up as the cameraman was on his lunch break.

"So who are going to be the three to return to Wawanakwa Island? Will Wallace commit anymore evil acts? Is Daisy going to regret how she treated Sasha; maybe in a minute, an hour, a day or even a week? And can I get anymore long, tan and handsome? Find out when we return to Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

So each of the three tubs of golden hair gel have been found. But nobody has gotten back to Chris just yet. The next chapter will see eleven ex campers fail and three others getting a second chance. Who will it be? I'm not telling you! You'll have to stay tuned for the next chapter in order to find out!

And seriously Daisy, that wasn't very nice. Does that count as crossing the moral event horizon by any chance? Poor Sasha!


	31. Day 14, Part 2, A chance to return

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. I also do not won the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet which gets more awesome with every chapter. However; I do own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Understand? Good, thank you.

**The warning: **This chapter contains hair related discrimination, a really bad pun, nasty insults, a big brawl, a proximity bomb and an electrical leather jacket. You have been warned but rest easy as it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana **BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Sorry for the wait everyone; I've been busy lately as my year 11 exams at school are on the near horizon and I don't want to fail them. Also for those of you who have checked the Total Drama Wiki recently you will know that the trailer for Total Drama Revenge of the Island has been released. I'll be putting up my thoughts and predictions based on it on my deviantart profile either today, tomorrow or a few days. Either way season four is gonna be really good!

**Poll results: **None of you voted for Daisy or Nakia, one of you voted for Kasimar and Wallace and Tabitha tied with two votes each. Interestingly enough Wallace and Tabitha are in fact on them more nice side of the villain street with Kasimar on the other side and Nakia and Daisy in the middle but leaning towards Kasimar. None are truly wonderful people but I thought I'd let you all know.

Lets go look for that hair gel!

* * *

"Welcome back to day fourteen of Total Drama Letterz!" Said Chris from his deckchair as he took a sip of a latté. "If you are only just joining us a lot of stuff has happened; Daisy pulled Sasha's hair, Wallace has started to draw a moustache on Nakia's face and part of the floor above the basement has caved in … which will probably need repairing sooner or later."

Chris shrugged as he took another sip of his latté and continued.

"Currently the fourteen campers who have been voted off of Total Drama Letterz are looking around the hotel for the hair gel. What they don't know is that every tub of it has already been found. So pretty soon there is going to be a big fight at the finish line. I wonder who is going to return to the competition. Well; most of the people here are pretty rubbish … well, lets face it, everyone is rubbish compared to the awesome me right?"

"I think it's about time to give those who don't have the hair gel a little bit of help; after all, I want this to be as dramatic as possible with spilt blood and knocked out teeth! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistcially as he relaxed.

* * *

Wallace stood up and admired the 'evil' artwork he had just created. Nakia now had a black moustache under her nose and it had been drawn in a permanent marker so it would probably smudge if she tried to wipe it off.

"Isn't this diabolical? Not only does she have a moustache but if she tries to wipe it off then it will smudge! Mwuhahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

"But Wallace; Nakia is going to be pretty angry when she wakes up." Gulped Carlton. "Maybe it would be a better idea to get out of here before she regains consciousness."

"But where is the fun in that my boy?" Asked Wallace with a smirk. "Besides; Nakia is pretty harmless; she thinks she's all that and a bag of carrot sticks but really she's a complete push over."

"And she probably tastes worse than a suitcase." Agreed Patch.

"And you know what a suitcase tastes like why exactly?" Asked Carlton in confusion.

"I like pie's the best." Burped Patch as he rubbed his gut hungrily.

"Well boys; I don't think we've got anymore business down here, lets get back to the ground floor and locate the rest of the hair gel." Said Wallace before suddenly smirking. "Though I know one more evil thing we can do … Mwahahahaha!"

"What's that Wallace?" Asked Carlton hesitantly.

"Let's pull her hair!" Cackled Wallace.

Nakia suddenly sat bolt upright and clutched her hair in panic.

"No! Don't pull my hair!" Wailed Nakia before looking around and noticing the three guys looking at her and also spotting the hair gel tub in his hands. She then felt a tickyliness under her nose and spotted the marker pen poking out of Wallace's pocket. Nakia quickly put to and two together to make four.

"You drew a moustache on me! How dare you!" Screamed Nakia in rage. "Now … give me that hair gel NOW!"

"…Cheese it!" Yelled Wallace as he took off running up the stairs.

Patch and Carlton didn't need telling twice and ran off after their leader. Nakia jumped to her feet and took off running after them at quite a speed.

"When I catch you I'll rip your hides and snap you #bleep# bones for DARING to talk bad of my hair!" Snarled Nakia as she charged up the stars after the wannabe bad guy and his two minions with F's in evil.

* * *

Andy, Vinnie and Zita were walking down the stairs to the ground floor of the hotel and were keeping an eye out for the remaining hair gel. Currently they were talking about who should get the hair gel they had already managed to find as they only had one of the three hair gel container; this only one of them was guaranteed to get back in the game.

"So who should get the hair gel?" Asked Vinnie. "We only have enough for one of us to return so far and who knows where the rest of is. How are we going to decide?"

"I guess whoever needs to return the most." Said Zita. "I'm not sure if I need it or not; Tabitha and Kasimar never wronged me really though exposing Tabitha would be fine by me. And I'd kind of like the money."

"I'd like to return so I can stop Tabitha from manipulating Uzuri; the prize would be nice but I'm more concerned with making sure Tabitha loses." Said Vinnie. "So; what about you Andy?"

"Well the way I see it Tabitha has a lot of power in this game; she is smart and charismatic. She's also allied with Uzuri and Kasimar. I'd like to return to bring her alliance crashing down from under her and making sure she can't either directly or indirectly hurt anyone else, you heard her tell Kasimar to hurt Gary right? That's the first reason I'd like to return."

"So what's the second?" Asked Zita before realization struck her. "Does it have to do with a certain blue haired girl?"

"…Sort of." Blushed Andy with a smile. "I'd like to maybe go back and make progress with Mable. And judging by some of the things she's said she may like me too. We could both be in the finals together."

"You know … I think Andy should get the hair gel." Said Vinnie. "He has more reasons than us."

"I agree." Nodded Zita as she reached into her pocket and took out the hair gel which she passed to Andy. "Here you go Andy."

"Thanks guys … but we might just get all three hair gel tubs." Pointed out Andy. "I wonder if anybody else has found them."

As if to answer Andy's question the intercom that had been installed around the whole Playa crackled into life and Chris's voice was emitted from it.

"Attention losers, both since you are voted off and generally losers, the three tubs of hair gel have been located. Currently Andy, Vinnie and Zita have one, Wallace, Patch and Carlton have the second and Daisy has the last one. You might want to, oh I don't know … fight them for the hair gel if you don't already have some … that is all."

The three blinked and stood still for a moment.

"Aw crap." Said Zita. "Now if anyone finds us they'll try to take the hair gel from us. We'd better keep moving."

"Look! There they are; and I see the hair gel!" Said Irene as she rounded a corner and spotted the trio; Hector and Yessica appeared behind her. "Let's get them!"

"Son of a bitch." Mumbled Andy as he looked up at the intercom in disdain.

"Cheese it!" Yelled Vinnie as he took off running down the hall with Andy and Zita following close behind,; a few meters behind them were Irene, Hector and Yessica and they looked determined to get the hair gel.

"You can run but you can't hide you 'hair gel havers!" Warned Irene.

"If I were a Grammar Nazi I would be having a field day." Said Hector as he tried to keep up with Irene and Yessica, the former of which was fairly speedy.

* * *

Fifi, Raven and Gary had abandoned looking in the TV room as according to Chris's announcement all the tubs of golden hair gel had already been found. They had to either look for Andy, Vinnie and Zita, Wallace, Patch and Carlton or maybe Daisy. They still had a chance at this contest and were eager to not blow it.

"Where could the people with hair gel be?" Asked Gary as Fifi pushed him in his wheelchair. "If we can't find any hair gel I'll never be able to leave Tabitha and Kasimar with tire tracks on over eight five percent of their bodies."

"Don't worry Gary; nobody has crossed the finish line yet; if they had Chris would have surely announced it." Said Fifi. "I think we should get the hair gel from Daisy first; she's pretty harmless and it'll be three against one anyway."

"That seems like a pretty good idea." Agreed raven as she walked alongside Gary and Fifi on her crutches. "But I have a slight irking of a suggestion … how about we wait by the finish line and snag the hair gel from someone when they are about to cross?"

"My, my Raven … that's not only a very good idea but seems unusually devious of you." Noted Gary with a smile to his girlfriend.

"Well; to be honest; when a large reward or something that would be off tremendous benefit is up for grabs I sometimes get slightly devious ideas but I have the good integrity to not act on them." Admitted Raven shyly. "I'm no schemer."

"Neither am I but that seems like an idea worth trying." Smiled Gary. "What do you think Fifi?"

"Sounds like a plan." Agreed Fifi. "Since we are on the ground floor we can get to the finish line without the obstacle of stairs … wait; I think I hear somebody coming."

Just as Fifi said that Daisy walked around the corner with a smug expression of airy superiority and a tub of golden hair gel with Chris's face in one hand. She noticed the three looking at her and both sneered and frowned.

"Oh great; the 'riff raff' are here." Said Daisy as dryly as sourly. "Get out of my way; I need to get to the finish line."

"About that … we'd like the hair gel you've got." Said Gary. "After all; Chris said taking it from other people was completely allowed."

"Shut up you filthy cripple." Scowled Daisy. "I don't care what Chris said; I'm not letting go of the hair gel. Its MINE!

Raven looked at Daisy in fury and with a snarl. The normally kind and plucky girl looked quite scary.

"Did you just say what I think you said?" Asked Raven in a deadly and furious whisper. "Did you just call my boyfriend a _cripple_!"

"I'm just telling it how it is sweetie." Smirked Daisy condescendingly. "And what are you going to do about it? Lay even a finger on me, harm just a hair on my perfect head … and I'll have you expelled from your school."

"See; it's because of your unlikable attitude that you were voted off." Frowned Fifi disapprovingly.

"Shut up! You're a loser yourself; you only lasted two measly days! Ha!" Sneered Daisy.

"I'd rather last two days than one day." Retorted Fifi.

"Gee; no wonder your dad left you and your mother, if I was him I'd have done the same so I wouldn't have to put up with you." Said Daisy nastily.

Gary and Raven gasped at the atrocious thing that Daisy had just said. Fifi looked shocked and silent. A few moments passed before she snarled and roared in anger.

"Let me at her!" Screamed Fifi in immense rage. "I'll skin her alive!"

Daisy screamed cowardly and took off running with Fifi sprinting behind her and Gary and Raven trying to keep up.

"She shouldn't have done that." Said Gary as he wheeled along.

"Daisy is SO for it now." Agreed Raven. "Better call her a hearse."

"Ok; she's a hearse." Laughed Gary at the very bad pun.

"You tell a lot of pretty corny jokes." Sighed Raven before smiling lovingly. "And I love you for that."

* * *

Wallace was running quite fast down the corridor with Carlton very close behind him. Patch was somehow managing to keep up despite gasping for air. Nakia wasn't giving up and was still hot on their heels.

"Get back here!" Roared Nakia. "You're gonna have to stop and catch your breath sooner or later."

"So will you!" Called back Wallace.

"I hardly feel tired; when I really want something I NEVER give up!" Said Nakia determinedly. "Now get back here at once!"

"You'll have to catch us first!" Taunted Wallace. "Boy Carlton; you're a good runner."

"Actually I'm afraid Nakia might beat might up!" Whimpered Carlton.

"Well keep going as you are and she won't." Said Wallace. "Hey Nakia! You're ugly! Mwahahahahahahaha! I'm so evil I called her ugly!"

"Good one boss!" Smiled Patch dumbly.

A short distance ahead coming down another corridor were Andy, Zita and Vinnie. They were being chased by Irene, Yessica and Hector. Irene was starting to catch up to her targets and was pulling away from Yessica and Hector.

"Watch out Irene; your momentum is going to make it harder to slow down at the next corner. " Warned Hector.

"Momentum?" Blinked Irene. "I'm just running fast."

"Exactly; momentum is velocity times mass." Explained Hector. "The faster you hit something the more pain you'll be in."

"Thank you captain obvious." Said Yessica with a chuckle. "C'mon Irene! You've nearly got them!"

And indeed she nearly had; Irene was but a meter behind Andy, the one who was holding the hair gel.

Up ahead and to the right Daisy was running away from Fifi. It turned out that her choice of words had been … rather poor to sugarcoat things and now she was paying the _expensive_ price. Fifi was close behind chasing the bratty teachers pet and had a murderous expression on her face. Close behind Fifi were Gary and Raven. Raven was riding on the back of Gary's wheelchair and kicking against the floor to speed them along.

"Keep kicking Raven." Said Gary to support his girlfriend. "Man; how did you get your kick to be so strong?"

"I just have naturally strong legs; it runs in the family." Explained Raven. "Now you're in charge of steering ok? Boy; this is just like Mario Kart double dash! Wheeee!"

"Wheeee indeed." Agreed Gary. "Go get her Fifi!"

"Get back her you little coward!" Snarled Fifi as she raced after Daisy. "Can't take the pain? What a wimp! You can dish it out but you can't take it!"

"Waaaaaaah!" Wailed Daisy as she fled from the _pissed off_ feminist.

What everyone in all three chases didn't know was that they were heading towards each other and a collision was looking.

They were twenty five steps apart … then ten steps apart … then they were just five steps apart … and then…

BAM!

All fourteen campers crashed into each other and lay groaning in pain in a big pile.

"Ow my spleen." Groaned Carlton in pain.

"Get off me! Get OFF me you fat slob!" Growled Nakia as Patch lay on her dazed.

"Salad dressing." Said Patch blankly.

"I think I just lost my other arm … now wait; its ok." Said Vinnie as he tried to get the dizzy feeling out of his head and vision.

"I can't breath!" Gasped Yessica from the bottom of the pile.

"If you don't all get off me immediately I'll activate my shock suit!"" Warned Wallace.

"My leg's stuck." Said Hector.

"Let me out!" Barked Daisy as she tried to get out from under Hector.

"That's it! I warned you! I'm activating the shock suit!" Said Wallace as he pressed a button within his leather jacket.

ZAP!

Everyone in the pile was zapped and immediately shot up to their feet. Wallace casually got to his feet and dusted himself off.

"I'd like to stay and chat but I've got a challenge to win." Said Wallace. "Run my minions! Mwahahahahahahahaha!"

Wallace took off running away and Nakia quickly ran after him.

"Get back here you whelp!" Bellowed Nakia. "You drew a moustache on my face and that can't go unpunished!"

Andy had begun to sneak off unnoticed but he was quickly spotted.

"Andy's got hair gel! Lets get him and tickle him till he squirms and he squeals!" Declared Irene with a sneaky smile.

"I don't see the point of tickling him." Said Patch as he scratched himself. "Why not fart on him? Everybody loves farts!"

"I'm outta here!" Yelped Andy as he took off like a bullet in fear of the idea of being farted on by Patch while a few others quickly ran after him.

Daisy saw her small tub of hair gel in front of her and was about to make a grab for it when a certain someone wearing mostly pink picked it up.

"Thanks; this is _just_ what I need." Smirked Fifi at her enemy.

"Give it to me; hand it over!" Said Daisy stiffly as she held out her hand expecting Fifi to do as she said … she was wrong.

"Yeah right. See ya!" Scoffed Fifi as she ran down a corridor that led towards the hotel's exit.

Daisy blinked and snarled in frustration as she ran after Fifi. Gary and Raven were soon left alone as the other losers went in different directions.

"So what now? Fifi has the hair gel but not us; we'll never catch up to the others now." Said Gary glumly.

"We'll do what I suggested before the chase. We'll go and wait by the finish line for somebody with hair gel." Said Raven. "But we'll have to be quick to beat the others there."

"Good idea." Said Gary as they both made a beeline for the finish as fast as they could make themselves go."

* * *

Wallace ran into the TV room where the losers watched the new episodes and slammed the door; he looked for a hiding place and instantly saw one.

"She'll never find me." Said Wallace confidently.

Wallace ran over to a lamp as Nakia hammered on the door and he put the lampshade over his head. He pulled the string and somehow a light turned on. It was a very paper thing disguise … but would it work?

Nakia burst into the room and looked around. She saw the chairs, the television, the windows … but no sign of Wallace at all.

"Aw dammit!" Whined Nakia as she stomped her feet in a tantrum. "Where did that bad haired bad guy go?"

Nakia walked right by the barely hidden Wallace and looked around the room. Wallace smirked silently; Nakia was so dumb she didn't even see through the disguise even HE would admit was pretty bad.

"_What a foolish girl_." Thought Wallace to himself. "_She is an insult to evil all over the world_! _If she didn't have her so called 'perfect hair' I don't know how she'd get by_.

Nakia was about to gibe up when suddenly …

…

…

…

…

…

Wallace sneezed loudly.

The lamp head flew off Wallace's head and onto the floor. Nakia smirked as she slowly approached Wallace.

"Aw biscuits!" Said Wallace. "With that POW I'm gone!"

Wallace ran out of the room with Nakia inches behind him as ferocious as a pack of bees chasing, err, _buzzing _after a man covered in honey.

* * *

Andy was in a similar predicament to Wallace. A group of the others were chasing after him; four to be exact, Irene, Hector, Patch and Carlton, the latter most of which was being dragged along like a broken down care by Patch and the former most of which was looking excited and seemed to be having a good time.

"I'm hungry! Can we stop for ice cream?" Asked Patch as he ran along dragging Carlton.

"Let me go! I don't want to return to that scary island!" Wailed Carlton in terror.

"Oh my goodness." Panted Hector. "It's a shame I was never terribly talented at gym class."

"Lucky for me I have a very active life style." Said Irene. "Sorry Andy but all's fair in love and war … and this is the latter!"

Andy ran around a corner and ran a little way up the wall before getting back to the ground. His pursuers were beginning to fall behind but if he slowed down they would quickly catch up and Andy couldn't run forever.

Andy opened a door and slammed it shut; he saw a cupboard to the side and had an idea.

"Here goes; I hope they don't get in here." Gulped Andy.

Andy pushed the cupboard, which was somewhat heavy, in front of the door and thankfully the door could only be opened inwards. He relaxed, sighed in relief and then breathed deeply as he was tired and had managed to buy himself some time.

"Ok; way out." Said Andy. He saw the door bit it seemed to obvious, and there was a chance somebody else was on the other side. Andy's eyes landed on the window.

"When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade." Shrugged Andy as he looked out of the window; it was from the first storey of the building as the others had chased him up the stairs.

Andy jumped … and landed in the deep end of the biggest poll; he coughed out some water and hauled himself out of the pool.

"And then the lemons turn out to be poisonous and you get sued." Lamented Andy.

* * *

Fifi was running from Daisy and the rest of the campers that hadn't ran after Wallace or Andy hadn't gone to wait at the finish line. She ran down the stairs leading to the front gates three at a time.

"Get back here you disobedient #bleep'!" Snarled Daisy.

"A tad touchy don't you think." Said Yessica.

"Quiet you." Said Daisy.

Fifi reached the bottom of the stairs but just as she ran towards the doors leading outside to the finish line…

…

…

…

…

She tripped over.

Fifi quickly got up but by then the others had surrounded her and everyone was trying to get the hair gel. It was a five way struggle for the hair gel between Daisy, Fifi, Yessica, Zita and Vinnie and none of them were getting a clear advantage.

"Let me have it!" Demanded Daisy. "I had it first!"

"And you were voted off first!" Added Zita. "Its mine!"

"I think you'll find it is something I will require so hand it over!" Smirked Yessica.

"Most of you are my friends but I'd like it back _very_ much!" Said Fifi.

"STOP!" Yelled Vinnie. "This hair gel is turning us into greedy monsters unlike our normal selves! Returning would be great but isn't fighting what Chris wants? Since when do we give that jerk what he wants?"

"Never … but I really want to get back into the competition." Said Zita guiltily. "If there was a better way I'd take it."

"And don't you want to return to the game as well?" Asked Fifi.

"Well yeah … but…" Vinnie trailed off.

A few moments later the fierce struggle began once again and was pull of pulling and shoving as they gradually moved outside and slowly but surely in the general direction of the finish line.

* * *

Chris sat in his deck chair drinking a latté watching all the fighting and carnage on the TV screen system.

"This is the life watching fights and not having to lift a finger to make it happen! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "I wonder who's going to return; hopefully someone who'll cause some drama. And I don't want any fat people returning either."

At that moment Andy ran over the fi9nish line with his tub of hair gel and screeched to a halt. He took in a few breaths of air as Chris got up and walked towards him.

"You're in for a real treat Andy … I'm actually going to say good job to you." Said Chris condescendingly. "You've crossed the finish line with the hair gel and as such...

…

…

…

You're back in the competition dude!"

"YES!" Said Andy pumping a fist in celebration. "But first things first; I'll have to help Zita and Vinnie get some hair gel as they were working with me."

"Hmmm … nope! You can't do that!" Taunted Chris meanly. "Once you cross the finish line with the hair gel you are no longer considered a loser and also such you cannot help anybody who is still looking for hair gel."

"…You're the devil." Said Andy in a highly deadpan voice.

* * *

Wallace was still running from Nakia and was starting to get tired; the finish line was nearby so he wouldn't have to run for much longer. Nakia was true to her word; when she wanted something she would _never_ give up.

"Give me that hair gel or face the unstoppable wrath of me and my hair!" Threatened Nakia as she closed in on Wallace.

Wallace turned his head back to Nakia as he ran.

"Wrath? You're about as dangerous as a mud pie!" Smirked Wallace. "So long los- Oof!"

Wallace crashed into the group of ex campers struggling for the hair gel and was soon caught amongst them. Nakia followed and began to make grabs for the hair gel. Nobody noticed the hair gel that Wallace had been holding had flew out of the brawl and landed on the ground.

A few moments later Daisy was sent sprawling out of the brawl and landed on her back. She got to her knees as she rubbed her head.

"Ow! How dare those pieces of trash hurt _me_!" Scowled Daisy.

Her gaze suddenly landed on the tub of hair gel next to her; she blinked and then cackled in triumph.

"Excellent." Said Daisy in dark joy.

Daisy grabbed it and ran for the finish line full tilt before anybody had a chance to even think about stopping her. Daisy crossed the line and looked satisfied.

"Looks like I'm back in the competition like I should be." Said Daisy smugly as Andy groaned.

"Indeed you are Daisy." Nodded Chris.

"Aw nuts." Said Andy quietly.

Chris took out a megaphone, set its amplification to maximum and began to speak into it.

"Attention losers across the playa. Andy and Daisy have got across the finish line with hair gel; there is only one spot left to get back into the competition so you might all want to get the last tub of hair gel. Chris out." Announced Chris as he sat back down in his deck chair.

Irene, Hector, Patch and Carlton ran out of the front doors of the hotel at that moment and saw the finish line a short distance away; they also saw the big struggle mob heading towards it.

"Cannon ball!" Yelled Patch as he ran towards the crowd dragging Carlton and soon both were buried within the mob.

Irene and Hector quickly followed and a twelve person struggle was fighting over the one remaining tub of golden hair gel. Only one of them was going to get back in the game … who would it be?

"I cannot watch yet I cannot look away." Said Andy as he looked at the group of losers coming closer to the finish line.

"Speak for yourself." Scoffed Daisy. "I love watching fights; it just means more people to report to teachers."

"If you keep that attitude up you're just going to get voted off again pretty soon." Warned Andy.

"As if." Said Daisy snootily.

The big mob was getting closer to the finish line; they would definitely reach it within a single minute if not less.

Fifteen meters.

Ten meters.

Five Meters.

Proximity bomb.

Four m … wait; proximity bomb?

BOOM!

The proximity bomb Wallace had placed earlier on had come to a great effect. The explosion sent all twelve campers and the hair gel in the mob flying and around the area.

Eleven of the twelve campers lay around dazed and groaning; as could be logically expected the proximity bomb hadn't _quite_ agreed with them. Gary was an exception; he shook the dizziness off and looked around. The hair gel had landed very near him; this was his chance to get back into the competition! But then his gaze quickly located Raven; she was lying on her side in pain. They had only just got here; they had actualy been a little too early, if they had been slower they could have avoided the explosion.

Gary looked from the hair gel to Raven. He had to choose. A million dollars or his girlfriend. Gary thought for a moment and made his decision. He wheeled himself over to…

…

…

…

…

…

Raven.

While Gary wheeled over to Raven to make sure she was ok the hair gel remained in place.

"Oh come on!" Said Chris impatiently. "Somebody win already! I'm getting really bored!"

Nakia's eyes fluttered open and she shook her head a little. When her vision came into focus she saw the hair gel right in front of her just mere inches away.

"Well, well … the hair gel." Smirked Nakia as she grabbed the hair gel.

Chris sounded an air horn which made the campers jump to their feet in alarm. Chris chuckled sadistically and began to talk.

"Well campers; all I can after that explosion is … this challenge is over!" Said Chris with a pleased smirk. "Any, Daisy and Nakia have won!"

The campers looked over to Nakia and saw her holding the hair gel. Damn! The spoiled shallow brat had been fortunate to not only land near the hair gel but also over the finish line.

"Yep; you can complain all you want but the fact is that the eleven of you who haven't crossed the line with hair gel have no hope of winning now." Smirked Chris sadistically.

"Aw biscuits!" Said Wallace. "Well; at least I prevented some of the others from going back, that's evil in itself."

"Thank goodness!" Said Carlton in great relief. "I never wanted to return anyway."

"I don't think this is very fair." Said Irene with crossed arms. "I accept I lost but Wallace cheated!"

"Do you think I give a damn at all?" Asked Chris dryly. "Cheating makes things interesting."

"Well; that's that then." Said Gary. "Looks like any chance of winning has slipped through my fingers."

"You know Gary; you could have won." Said Raven while smiling at her boyfriend. "If you'd gone for the hair gel instead of checking I was ok you'd be back in the game … but I'm genuinely touched."

"A million would be nice but you're worth more than all that money." Replied Gary.

Raven giggled in appreciation and leaned in to kiss Gary.

"Stop that!" Snapped Chris. "Love makes for terrible TV! Anyway; Andy, Daisy, Nakia … good job you three. You've earned a second chance at the million."

"So … when do we get back to the Island? I'd like to wring Spider's scrawny neck as soon as possible." Scowled Nakia.

"You'll be back on Wawanakwa tomorrow; but as of this exact moment in time you are officially back in the contest." Said Chris. "Also; the interns have set up a temporary confessional over there."

Chris pointed to an outhouse by the dock that looked a little cleaner than the one at the island.

"So; if you want to make a confessional celebrating your return then feel free. In the mean time I'm going to watch the explosion in slow motion replay and laugh about it." Said Chris sadistically as he walked back to his viewing station.

* * *

**Resort Confessional: I smell so nice and clean!**

**Andy: So I'm back in the competition? Awesome! I'll shoot for the stars and the million. But I've got bigger aliens to fry besides the million; firstly on my to do list is bring Tabitha's alliance crashing down beneath her and have her booted off the island. My second thing I aim to do … tell Mable how I feel. I may not have been on her team but I am quite fond of her, she can just stand up to bullies easily and she's really nice. Well; being voted off was a minor set back, with my arm back to normal I might just make it all the way to the end. My adventure on Wawanakwa isn't over yet…**

**Daisy: Whatever; I'm returning, big deal. With those thirteen losers as my competition how could I not? That million is as good as mine. They should just hand me the cheque right now. Well; I'll humor the others and compete normally … but there's no way they can beat me. While Andy wastes time trying to expose that bitch Tabitha and Nakia tries to get back at her team mates I will be competing hard and picking every off one by one. I'll make them pay for voting me off, all of them.**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair and looks very smug). **And so I get what I want as usual; in just two weeks I'll have a million dollars and be the most envied person in the entire world, not that people can envy me as much as they already do. I'm aware I have some enemies … but maybe Tabitha could work for me, she's fine by me as purple streaks are SO in. Oh; and one last thing … Spider had better watch out, him and his had haired whore of a girlfriend both. Nobody crosses me and gets away with it. Be prepared Spider … be prepared. Mwuhahaha … no wait; that doesn't sound right … how about Ga'fahahaha! No … darn; Wallace makes this look so easy! Well my point still stands … Spider is **_**dead meat**_**!**

* * *

Spider was sitting up in his bed in the medical tent; he and Quana had been flirting with each other. He suddenly shuddered.

"Are you ok Spider?" Asked Quana to her boyfriend in concern.

"I don't know why … but *cough* I've got a _**BAD**_ feeling about *cough* tomorrow." Replied Spider in worry.

* * *

So Andy, Nakia and Daisy have won the challenge and will be back on the island next chapter. Remember I said I had a plan for Andy and Mable hooking up? This is the beginning of it.

As of now the pre merge challenges and the teams are OFFFICIALLY OVER. From here on in its every man or women for themselves. You can expect there to be a lot of drama; even more than usual, in the coming episodes. I'd like to also say that NOBODY is going to return from this point on. Once somebody is voted out now they have no chance of returning.

So pick someone to root for and hang on for the wild ride!

Next time: The campers are tasked with writing Total Drama Letterz fanfiction; sounds like trouble right? Also the drama starts to go up once the three returning campers begin to settle in.


	32. Day 15, Part 1, Fun Fast Fanfiction

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do now own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his super duper awesome story Total Drama Alphabet which, may I add, inspired me to write this story. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them ok? Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains some love, a horrible threat, a curtsey pet name, hair related discrimination, two complete brats, fanfiction writing and a broken nose. Nothing M rated thought nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana **BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **It's nearly the end of the Easter holidays for me and then I'll be back in the old rut known as school. That however won't stop me from writing in my spare time. Anyway; today's challenge is going to be probably pretty funny so hold onto your monkey tails folks! Also the story is now in the merge, so as of this chapter Team Grenade, Team Puzzle and Team Jungle are no more. But trust me; the drama is only just starting. Including day fifteen there are still fourteen episodes to go so the wild ride known as Total Drama letterz is far from over! Now on with the story.

I like apple pie!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame looking in quite a good mood. It was around eight in the morning on Wawanakwa and the sun was shining as usual. Chris threw up his arms dramatically and began his recap.

"Last time on Total Drama letterz. The drama was not on Wawanakwa but on Playa Des Losers instead. It was a rat race and search around the Playa for three tubs of golden hair gel that would allow the loser holding it to return to the competition!"

"But everything good in life doesn't come easily though! Haha! The tubs of hair gel were well hidden and the losers were allowed to steal them from each other. Everyone besides Daisy and Nakia worked in small teams to make winning easier. Well; it seemed good in planning but in the end not much good came from, not much at all. Haha!"

"The first tub of hair gel had been entrusted to the wannabe detective Eddie. When Andy, Vinnie and Zita found him he let them have it after a short conversation. He should have made them fight for it … stupid teen. On the bottom floor Daisy was working alone and found Sasha playing on her DS in the library. Rather than be polite she simply demanded to know where the hair gel was. Sasha refused to tell her despite Daisy's threats. Daisy pretended to leave but quickly went to plan B … pulling Sasha's ponytail _hard_ and basically attacking her. Sasha told her what she needed to know and Daisy left with the second tub of hair gel; Sasha wants to get back at her but I doubt that will happen. Haha!"

"Bad guy Wallace and his two new minions Patch and Carlton secured the last tub of hair gel with the help of some plastic explosive. I don't know where he got it from … but dude! It blew up part of the ceiling above them. By coincidence Nakia was up there and fell down to them unconscious. Wallace decided to be 'evil' and drew a moustache on her face. But when he mentioned pulling her hair Nakia quickly regained consciousness and began to chase down the three idiots."

"Soon three chases were going on at once; Andy, Zita and Vinnie were being chased by Yessica, Hector and Irene, Daisy was being chased by Fifi, Raven and Gary for a particularly brutal yet funny comment about Fifi's family. And Wallace, Carlton and Patch were still being chased by Nakia. By another coincidence all the losers crashed into each other. Andy went one way with his tub of hair gel that his team had agreed he should have, Wallace went another way with Nakia right behind him while Fifi grabbed Daisy's hair gel and took off. Soon the chases continued.

"Andy managed to escape his oppressors by barricading himself in a room and jumping out the window … unknowingly into a pool. He then crossed the finish line and was back in the game."

"The rest of the losers crashed into each other shortly afterwards and a fight for the hair gel began. Nobody noticed Daisy make off with a forgotten tub of hair gel and thus she was the second to return to the contest."

"The fight for the last tub of hair gel continued and Wallace's proximity bomb he had laid down at the start of the challenge activated. Everyone was blown about and sent into a daze. Nakia however managed to land next to the hair gel over the finish line. She grabbed it and was the final person to get a second chance."

"Andy, Daisy and Nakia are arriving shortly, each with a different goal. Andy wants to bring Tabitha down and also get closer to Mable … Blech! Nakia wants to get revenge on her former team mates who voted her off back in episode three as well as make Spider suffer. And Daisy wants to … err … cause trouble I guess."

"Who will be the next person to be voted off? How will the camper fair now that the teams are dissolved? Will Kasimar get much further now that he is vulnerable to everybody's votes? What changes will the returning campers cause? And what Total Drama fanfic is better? Total Drama Comeback or Total Drama Chris? Find out the answers to the first four of those questions on today's episode of Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme Song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

Barney opened his eyes as he awoke to his fourteenth day on Wawanakwa Island. He yawned and stretched as he adjusted his hat and leapt out of bed. He smiled as he felt the bright sun shine through the window.

"Yaaaaar! Good morning Wawanakwa!" Smiled Barney as he put his hands to his side. "I have a feeling today is going to be like no other day!"

Barney reached into his pocket and took out a piece of paper; written at the top was the words 'To Do'. The list went as followed.

Hook up Spider and Quana (This was checked off)

Protect Lavender from that dick Kasimar and possibly make progress with her.

Win the million dollars.

If the previous cannot happen cheer Lavender on at the finale.

Barney glanced down at his list and nodded to himself as he pocketed the paper. The sound of yawning was heard and Barney turned to see Jimmy had woken up.

"Good morning me heartie." Said Barney. "Sleep well?"

"Yep; I dreamt I had won the contest." Said Jimmy as he got out of his bed. "And maybe that dream will come true."

"It might me heartie, it might." Nodded Barney before smirking. "That is if you can beat me first."

"I'm not sure if I can or not … but I'll certainly have a go." Smiled Jimmy. "I hope Spider is going to be ok; he looked really bad when he fell off his chair from the allergic reaction … though when I went to give him the card…"

Jimmy trailed off as he chuckled nervously; Barney raised an eyebrow but quickly put the pieces together.

"Oh! Well my, my!" Said Barney slyly. "So Spider and Quana were making out were they?"

"Yep." Blushed Jimmy. "And I walked in on them kissing. I thought it would be polite to make a quick exit."

"Spider's been in the medical tent all of yesterday and Chef Hatchet isn't allowing him any visitors besides Quana. I guess even Chef has a good side." Said Barney. "But when I find out who did that to Spider there will be reckoning."

"I think it might have been Kasimar." Murmured Jimmy. "He's so horrible and he's kinda scary."

"Yeah; that'd be my guess, that horrid sea fiend." Agreed Barney. "But we still need proof and I'm wondering where to find that me heartie."

"What proof do we need?" Asked Jimmy sounding puzzled. "We all know how nasty Kasimar is; look what he did to Gary and Raven!"

"True; I completely agree." Nodded Barney. "But you need proof to bring someone to justice; Canada isn't a Dictatorship."

* * *

**Confessional: I dictate all of your confessionals!**

**Barney: Dictatorships are so uncool savvy? Freedom of speech me hearties!**

**Jimmy: My grandpa told me that Hitler was a dictator … we all know how that turned out.** (Jimmy shudders).

* * *

"You have a point." Agreed Jimmy. "So … Spider and Quana huh?"

"Yep; I was wondering if it would ever happen." Admitted Barney. "But a true matchmaker never rests until he is tired!"

"Love makes the world go round … so they say." Said Jimmy with a chuckle. "So; I guess we should give them some alone time every now and then right?"

"Totally savvy." Nodded Barney before becoming wistful and wise "Being with somebody you love is best when it feels as though they are the only other one in the world … that's what I think anyway."

"Wow; that was deep, I swear you're holding out on us." Said Jimmy. "Well; I'll see you at breakfast Barney; it's been fourteen days so we're at the halfway point, maybe well get a good breakfast as a reward."

"Here's hoping." Said Barney as Jimmy left.

* * *

**Confessional: Was it a good breakfast?**

**Jimmy: I set my hopes too high; it was really thick, goopy, lumpy porridge. Ick!**

* * *

Lavender groggily got out of her bed and yawned sleepily. She had never really been a morning person and if given the chance would happily sleep in an hour or two or a few.

"I need some coffee" Mumbled Lavender as she put on her blue skirt. "I knew I should have bought some with me but ooooooh noooooo, mum says I'd be fine without it and that I'd need more space in the suitcase for the essentials."

While Lavender briefly and silently pondered on WHY exactly bringing a golf club was important when she had never even played golf, Mable woke up and immediately got out of bed.

"Morning Lavender; boy, you don't look too good." Said Mable as she looked at her sleepy friend.

"It's just because I'm sleepy." Replied Lavender tiredly. "I'm not a morning person. In fact; I heard Chris was going to make my stereotype label 'The Sleepyhead' originally."

"The nerve of some people right?" Agreed Mable as she placed a hand over her chest. "I don't know why but I have a feeling the next few days are going to be much better than usual … I have no idea why though."

"Maybe you feel that way because it's the merge more or less and Kasimar will soon be at the mercy of everyone's votes." Smirked Lavender as she chuckled. "I have promised myself that no matter what I will outlast that demon."

"You won't have to try very hard then; I think today is the day Kasimar walks the dock of shame." Said Mable with a longing smile. "He'll probably cry like a baby when he's voted off."

"I'd recommend filming that and putting it on YouTube; he deserves the humiliation." Said Lavender deviously. "The merge is either today is very soon; more than half of the twenty six of us are gone"

"Who's going to be next?" Asked Mable. "It could be any of us; Kasimar's gonna go pretty soon but after him I'm not so sure."

"The truth is only one of us can win." Said Lavender as she slipped her socks and shoes on. "I intend to be that person."

"As do I." Said Mable as she put her hair back into the usual long ponytail.

Xaria woke up and rubbed her eyes before yawning.

"Back to the old rut." Grumbled Xaria as she got out of bed. "I wonder what the torture will today."

"Good morning Xaria." Said Mable. "Ready for day fifteen?"

"Like I have a choice." Smirked Xaria. "Still; being on this god forsaken island _does_ have some benefits."

"I _see_." Smirked Lavender slyly. "You mean Oscar right?"

"Yep; he just makes me feel happy." Said Xaria with a shy smile. "Kind of like you and Barney."

Lavender turned as red as her hair and cheer leader shirt.

"Why do you have such interest in hooking me up with the genki pirate?" Asked Lavender in embarrassment

"Its obvious to us that you like him; you're even dreaming about him." Smirked Mable.

"What?" Said Lavender as he chest heated up. "…How do you know?"

"Because you've mumbled his name in your sleep a few times for the past three days." Said Xaria as she crossed her arms and smirked like Mable was.

"…I'll see you at breakfast." Said Lavender in extreme embarrassment as she quickly got dressed and left to the mess hall.

Xaria and Mable exchanged glances and smirked.

"I bet five bucks she and Barney will hook up by the end of the day." Offered Mable.

"I'll take some of that action; no way will it happen that fast." Replied Xaria as the two shook hands.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd like to take part in that bet as well!**

**Lavender: I would question exactly why those two have been listening to me talk in my sleep … but I've got other things on my mind… **(Lavender starts to think).

**Mable: This'll be the easiest five bucks I ever make! Heehee! Along with the good feeling I've got I think I'm going to enjoy today.**

**Xaria: It feels almost strange to bunk with two girls who don't have boyfriends but both have obvious crushes. Lavender likes Barney … and Mable liked Andy; too bad he got voted off. We could probably form a club or something.**

* * *

Oscar was hanging out outside the front of the mess hall; Kasimar had already disappeared when he had woke up and he was perfectly fine with this; after all, he hated Kasimar and any moments without him were very good indeed.

"Good thing I won't have to put up with him for much longer." Said Oscar to himself. "Kasimar has caused too much trouble for too long; I'm voting for him every challenge no matter what. And he's got no allies now."

"Do you talk to yourself often?" Asked Eleanor as she walked up to Oscar.

"Morning Eleanor; and yes, sometimes." Replied Oscar. "I'm just thinking about how much I'm going to enjoy Kasimar's elimination."

"Same her; he kind of scares me." Admitted Eleanor. "He's strong, mean, sexist, murderous and brutal … all that isn't a good combination _at all_."

"Tell me about it." Said Oscar with a groan. "I've been bunking with him for fifteen days now, today being the fifteenth. Any much longer and I'll snap."

"Well no worries right? He cannot retreat much further from his comeuppance." Assured Eleanor kindly. "The merge will be here soon so as soon as he doesn't win immunity he'll be gone."

"That's just it though; what if he does win immunity?" Asked Oscar skeptically. "If he does he'll wreck more havoc for another day. And as much as I hate to admit it, he's a very strong competitor. And he has a sort of immunity to spicy foods; it helped him in the eating challenge and might help him in the future."

Eleanor thought for a moment as Oscar put his hands in his pockets and looked up to the sky.

"You know; there's an old saying I've heard of. A person's greatest strengths can sometimes be their greatest weaknesses." Said Eleanor hopefully. "Maybe Kasimar could experience that."

"Hopefully … well, I don't want to spend my time thinking of a sadistic bully." Said Oscar as he changed the subject. "So; how many more days until Dandelion gives birth?"

"About a week." Said Eleanor as he bobbed up and down in excitement. "I'm really excited; it's going to be wonderful. Like every pet owners dream."

"Totally true." Agreed Oscar. "I bet having new pets AND winning the million dollars would be great right?"

"You know it." Smiled Eleanor. "I'm gonna get breakfast now … but since I haven't said it yet; congratulations on hooking up Xaria."

"Heh … thanks Eleanor." Blushed Oscar as he scratched his head nervously.

* * *

**Confessional: Ferrets are cute but I don't think they like fruit!**

**Oscar: Eleanor's a nice kid; kind and caring. And if Kasimar for whatever reason hurts her or makes her cry … then he's **_**dead**_**. I just don't like bullying and when my friends suffer I naturally protect them.**

**Eleanor: Oscar's nice; not only that but he's really got Xaria cheered up. That's so sweet. All seems well at the moment; I've got pretty far, Kasimar's luck is about to run out, Dandelion is going to give birth soon and Spider and Quana have hooked up. This is such a great summer!**

* * *

Kasimar was standing in the forest a short distance from camp leaning against a tree and smoking a cigarette. He had made it to the halfway point just as he'd expected; just eleven more wusses to beat and he'd be filthy rich. Tabitha had helped him a little but in Kasimar's opinion she was just a girl; not important in the long run and quite expendable. Tabitha also had Uzuri under her finger so he felt quite safe from votes, especially due to Tabitha being so charismatic.

"I wonder who I can beat up next." Pondered Kasimar. "That stupid blond kid sounds pretty easy to beat up … a good workout. I could cut his fingers off with scissors and shove them up his nose. Yahaha! I love this show! I can get away with anything and everything!"

Kasimar heard footsteps approaching. With the cigarette still in his mouth he readied himself in case it was someone he didn't like … practically everyone. He relaxed when it turned out to be Tabitha; she exited the overgrowth and stood a distance from Kasimar.

"Sup Tabitha?" Asked Kasimar as he puffed out some smoke.

"Could you get rid of that cigarette?" Asked Tabitha coyly. "I really don't want to suffer second hand smoking."

"… Fine." Grunted Kasimar as he tossed it to his feet and stepped on it. "So; who do you want me to maul next? And remember that I come at a price!"

"I don't need you to maul anyone yet." Replied Tabitha as she walked closer as the cigarette smoke cleared. "Chris told me and Uzuri at our latest Bonfire Ceremony that it's the merge. Therefore it is important that we make sure you get immunity as your nasty actions have put a target on your back. And I may not be the nicest person but I really think you pushing Raven to the bear was a little overboard."

"Rather her than me." Shrugged Kasimar. "Besides; her screams were pretty funny and she's reunited with that faggot chef so really she should be thanking me … and maybe giving me h-."

"Ok; that's enough!" Said Tabitha to get rid of the horrific mental image. "Seriously; hurting people is fine and all … but seriously, you mustn't put them in danger of dying."

"What'evs." Grunted Kasimar. "I'll do what I want … after all, do you want my help or not?"

"Regretfully I do out of necessity." Replied Tabitha. "Just so we are clear I do not trust you; so don't try anything on me, got it?"

"Fine; if you say so." Shrugged Kasimar. "Nobody truly trusts me but it doesn't matter, I could put them into the infirmary if I wanted, boys or girls, old or young … its just another victim."

"_This guy's a psycho_." Thought Tabitha to herself. "Well; just make sure you win immunity ok? I doubt even my charisma could save you otherwise … and I need you in the game for me to progress."

"I'm harder to squish than a cockroach." Replied Kasimar confidently.

"… Whatever." Said Tabitha as she turned to leave.

As she turned Kasimar gazed at Tabitha's ass and grinned devilishly. In perverted desire he slapped her on the butt.

"YOWCH!" Wailed Tabitha as she jumped a foot off the ground and turned to glare at Kasimar. "What the #bleep# was that for you monster? If you do that again you'll be out of here before you can say Barrington … got it?"

"Fine; keep your blond and purple hair on women." Said Kasimar with a grin. "Nice ass by the way. But I didn't even whack ya hard; no need to scream."

"I'll have you know I'm _really_ sensitive back there." Growled Tabitha as she left the area. "Keep your pencil in your pocket you demon artist!"

As Tabitha left with one hand protectively over her pained backside Kasimar smirked.

"All the girls want me; they just don't know it yet." Chuckled Kasimar. "Quana's ass is the best but Tabitha's is nice and soft. Yahahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: I hope she knows what she's doing.**

**Tabitha: Kasimar is a creep … but whether I like it or not I need him as my ally. The fact is he's not only strong but he has a complete lack of morals. It's a better deal for me either way; I'll have to backstab him at some point … and if he tries smacking my butt again that time will arrive faster.**

**Kasimar: Winning immunity shouldn't be too hard; Chris will probably tilt it in my favor. I don't think I have anything to worry about.**

* * *

Quana awoke and yawned. For the past two days she had been sleeping in the medical tent on the chair next to Spider's bed. She hadn't left his side while he recovered from his allergy attack. As she stretched out she saw Spider was still asleep; he was snoring softly and looked, in her opinion, kinda cute. Quana reached over and stroked his untidy messy auburn hair. Spider stirred after a few moments and opened his eyes and smiled at his girlfriend.

"Morning sleepyhead." Smiled Quana lovingly. "How are you feeling?"

"A lot better *cough* than yesterday and the day *cough* before that." Replied Spider as he sat up. "How are you *sneeze* feeling sweetheart?"

"A lot better now that you are recovering." Said Quana kindly. "It's a good thing yesterday was a day off; otherwise I don't know how you'd have competed in a challenge."

"I guess luck was *gag* on my *cough* side." Mused Spider. "Well; it's the final twelve and *cough* we're both still here, but…"

"But what Spider?" Asked Quana in concern for the sudden look of worry on boyfriends face.

"Well; I really don't *cough* know why … but I have *cough* a _**bad**_ feeling about today." Explained Spider nervously. "It's probably nothing so *cough* so there's no point in *cough* worrying."

"Well; if you're sure." Said Quana before changing the subject. "I just remembered a question I wanted to ask you."

"Ok; what is *sneeze* it?" Asked Spider.

"What's your favorite song?" Asked Quana with interest.

"Probably Everybody Wants *cough* To Rule the World; I always liked *sneeze* music from the eighties." Said Spider. "So what's yours?"

"The Circle of Life from the lion king." Said Quana as she thought back a few years. "It was the song that I sung at the first singing competition I won."

"I always liked *cough* that movie." Agreed Spider before he suddenly seemed to think of something. "Hey Quana; I've just *cough* thought of a question to ask you."

"Ask away my little arachnid." Said Quana teasingly.

"It's not very important *cough* but … your favorite color is orange right?" Began Spider.

"Yes it is; why do you ask?" Said Quana curiously.

"Well … if Orange is cough* your favorite color then why *sneeze* don't you wear orange?" Asked Spider with idle curiosity.

Quana thought for a moment and with a sly smile she answered Spider's question.

"Actually … I do wear orange." Replied Quana with a giggle.

Spider was silent for a moment as his brain processed this information. Realization hit him and he turned red as tomato ketchup.

"Oh … err … *cough* I see." Said Spider while trying to not let his imagination wander.

Quana burst out into mirthful laughter and soon Spider was laughing as well.

"I really enjoy being with you Spider." Chuckled Quana happily. "The worlds much nicer whenever I'm with you."

"Right back at you *cough* Quana." Blushed Spider.

"And I've got to ask you Spider … a few days ago I got a love note on my cabins door; I'm guessing it was from you right?" Asked Quana.

"It was; Barney told me *cough* a love note is a great way to *sneeze* get a girl to like you." Said Spider embarrassed. "Looks like he was right."

"He's one of a kind alright." Agreed Quana before she grinned mischievously at her boyfriend. "And you know; I think we've got a few minutes before breakfast."

Both lovers smiled at each other and leaned in for a kiss; a few moments after they started smooching the intercom crackled into life.

"Attention losers!" Said Chris snidely over the intercom. "I hope you had a good sleep … actually I don't care; but whatever! All twelve of you report to the dock of shame for a special announcement pronto! That is all for now; and this time I'm turning off the intercom before I pick my nose … oh s-!"

The intercom turned off and Quana looked annoyed.

"It's as if Chris times his announcements to interrupt our private time." Grumbled Quana before smiling again. "Are you able to walk to the dock?"

"I think I *cough* might need some crutches." Said Spider glumly. "Well; hopefully *cough* I'll do ok in whatever the challenge *cough* is."

"I'm sure you will." Said Quana kindly as she got a pair of crutches for Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I hope he recovers quickly but as I'm not the author I don't know.**

**Spider: **(He has a crutch in each hand). **I am feeling mixed emotions ***cough* **at the moment. On one hand I ***cough* **feel worse than usual due to the ***sneeze* **the allergic reaction so I'll ***cough* **probably be useless until I recover. But on ***cough* **the other hand I feel a warm fuzzy ***cough* **now that me and Quana are together. She makes ***cough* **me feel happy. And … wow; she wears ***cough* **orange panties? Umm … nice. **(Spider grins sheepishly).

**Quana: I really think Spider and I have a connection. He's quite nervous and not used to having many friends… but he's got so many positive qualities. I don't care whether he's sick or not, he's special to me. And if I ever figure out who put the apple juice in his drink the heads are gonna roll. **

**Chris: Can't you just taste the drama? And its really gonna pick up in just a few minutes. Haha! This is gonna be awesome!**

* * *

The twelve remaining campers stood around the dock of shame as Chris Maclean stood before them. He was sipping a latté and gazing at the clouds.

"Did you call us here for a reason or did you just want us to watch you drink the stupid latté?" Asked Xaria dryly.

"Maybe he wants to make himself look big and important." Guessed Uzuri. "All bad guys like it when their slaves pay them attention … Chris is such a time wasting meanie!"

"Hang on; he's coming up to a big finish." Said Lavender in a bored tone.

Chris drank the last of his latté and tossed the cup into the water. Not caring about the littering he had just done he began to speak.

"Ok everyone; in case you've lost track of the days due to your dwindling sanity it is now day fifteen. We are now in the second half of the contest." Said Chris enthusiastically. "And do you know what that means?"

"That half of us are gone?" Guessed Mable.

"That we get better food from now on?" Said Jimmy hopefully.

"That you're going to reveal you are secretly a lunchbox?" Giggled Uzuri.

"Nope, you wish and what the heck?" Said Chris quickly answering each guess. "It means something far bigger than that and it is something that will alter how the game is played for the rest of the season!"

Chris was silent for a few moments.

"Were you going to finish that thought?" Asked Quana deadpan.

"Yes! Yes I was!" Snapped Chris. "I was going to make a big dramatic speech leading up to it … but since you runts are so rude and impatient I'll just skip to it. As of this exact moment in time …

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

The teams are no morel the merge is here! From now on it is every man for himself!"

"What about women?" Asked Tabitha.

"Who cares about them?" Smirked Chris. "I bet this time the final five will only be guys! Haha!"

Chris was promptly hit on the head by a thrown rock. He looked upon the campers but couldn't see who did it. After a moment of rubbing his head he continued.

"In the past fourteen days the weak have been separated from the strong and we are now left with you twelve. Congratulations; you've all reached the merge."

* * *

**Confessional: And so have I!**

**Tabitha: The merge huh? I knew I'd get here so its no big deal. Still, I can't let my guard down; there are still eleven idiots to eliminate. Soon enough I'll be rich … well, richer anyway.**

**Lavender: Alright! The merge is here! It hasn't really been that hard getting here … we may have lost Raven along the way, but Kasimar's luck is going to run out sooner or later! Mark my words!**

**Oscar: Not only have I made the merge but Xaria has too. I think the time leading up to the finals is going to be pretty enjoyable.**

**Kasimar: Big deal, I made it to the merge. Phfft; that's all I have to say. From the jailbait cheerleader to Bug … they're all going down!**

**Spider: I never thought I'd ***cough*** make the merge; in fact, I thought ***cough* **I'd be one of the first to** *sneeze*** go. I doubt I'll win … but there is always** *gag*** a chance. I just hope Kasimar doesn't try to ***cough* **hurt me.**

**Jimmy: Alright! The merge! I guess being nice to everyone and not succumbing to the urges of greed and selfishness is a guaranteed way to get far. Woohoo!**

**Uzuri: Hooray! The merge is here! I just wish Vinnie had made it ... but at least Tabitha made it ... me and my best friend agaist the world. Sounds fun! Teehee!**

**Eleanor: Yay! I made the merge … and to be honest I had a lot of help from my friends, cliché as that may sound. Its too bad we lost Andy and Zita along the way and I'm REALLY sorry I voted for you guys. Nakia wasn't so hard to vote for; she was so mean to Spider. Boy; a number of people are falling in love lately … I wonder what a kiss with your true love is like?**

* * *

"So yeah; the merge is here, it's a free for all, yadda yadda." Said Chris without interest. "But that is only half the reason I bought you here."

"What's the other half?" Asked Xaria with a snarky smirk. "You're coming out of the closest?"

Everybody started to laugh, even Tabitha, and Chris growled.

"Shut up you stupid ugly bi…" Chris trailed off as he saw Oscar giving him _the look_. "Oh ... whatever! The point is I want you to put on your biggest smiles for a few, ah, '_special guests_. Haha!"

"Special guests?" Repeated Mable. "And who are the guests? Your parents?"

"You'll see soon enough … like right now!" Smirked Chris as he pointed out towards the island waters.

A boat was approaching the dock of shame.

The boat docked though the twelve campers couldn't see who was on board. A moment later a plank was pushed out of the boat and onto the dock by an intern creating a makeshift bridge.

"Please welcome back three campers who have been voted off previously!" Announced Chris. "Hopefully none of them hold a grudge on you! Haha!"

Tabitha blinked and silently groaned.

* * *

**Confessional: She's in trouble now!**

**Tabitha: Aw crap! People are returning? This **_**might**_** be a problem… but its nothing I can't handle. Mum did always said blackmail is the best way of guaranteeing success.**

* * *

"Please welcome back

…

…

…

Daisy!"

Daisy strutted smugly off the boat and onto the dock and up to the other contestants.

"This is my competition?" Asked Daisy dryly. "Pathetic; you might as well give me the prize right now."

"Wasn't she the girl who got voted of on the first day?" Asked Jimmy to Eleanor; Eleanor nodded as Daisy walked up.

"Yes; I was." Said Daisy before snarling. "And I'm going to make everyone who voted for me seriously regret it! My inbox is full of taunts everyday! How dare such nobody's insult a perfect roll model like me!"

"She's not making a good impression." Muttered Lavender to Xaria and Mable.

"Watch it you!" Snapped Daisy. "I can make your life very miserable if you cross me."

"Oh; I'm _so_ scared." Said Lavender sarcastically.

"Yohoho! Good one Lavender!" Clapped Barney.

"And I must ask; how is this pirate weirdo still here?" Asked Daisy as she folded her arms.

"Because he's funny, a team player and he's got a heart of gold." Said Quana irritably before he expression softened. "And he managed to get me and Spider together."

Daisy just looked sickened as she glared at the happy couple and she turned up her nose haughtily.

* * *

**Confessional: There is no pleasing some people is there?**

**Daisy: Ugh! This stupid confessional smells as bad as I remember … but it could be worse I suppose. And my competition are all complete pushovers. A pirate weirdo, a talentless singer, a guy who's sick as a cancer patient, the list goes on!**

**Lavender: Yeah … I don't see her lasting very long. It's her foul attitude that made me vote for her back on day one.**

* * *

"Moving along from Daisy." Began Chris before Daisy quickly interrupted him.

"No! I deserve more screen time; the other two losers have had way more than me!" Snarled Daisy.

"Yeah, about that … I don't care! Haha!" Laughed Chris before ignoring Daisy's anger. "Give a warm, or cold, welcome to our next returning camper…

…

…

…

…

Andy!"

Andy stepped off the boat and down onto the dock.

"Hey everyone! I'm back and my arm has healed." Waved Andy as he walked up to the others and stood with his former team mates.

"Andy me boy! Great to have you back me heartie!" Grinned Barney as he fists bumped with his friend. "The gangs all here! Me, you, him and that guy!"

"Am I the so called 'that guy'?" Asked Jimmy.

"Maybe; but you're part of the team puzzle guys group." Smiled Barney. "So Andy; what was it like at Playa Des Losers?"

"It was fun to watch you all … and I learned a few interesting things I shall share with you as soon as possible." Said Andy.

When Barney turned away for a moment Andy briefly glared at Tabitha, nobody but the blond chess master noticed this and Tabitha instantly knew Andy was onto her.

"So Spider; you and Quana huh?" Smirked Andy as he turned to the sick guy and the singer who both blushed. "About time!"

"And it was all thanks to me!" Said Barney proudly.

"So Andy; how long did it take for your arm to fully heal?" Asked Mable as she walked up. "Hopefully it didn't hurt you too much."

"Naw; it wasn't so bad. The medical staff are professionals, they're the best. My arm was completely back to normal in just two days." Said Andy as she smiled at his crush.

"Well; I'm glad to know you're ok … and especially glad to know Wallace isn't returning." Said Mable in relief. "He cheated way too much."

"Stop looking at that nerdy nobody!" Snapped Daisy. "I should be the most focused on; I'm the best person here."

"Shut up already." Said Andy dully. "I'm trying to talk to my friends."

Daisy huffed indignantly and turned away in a strop.

"Good to have you back Andy." Said Mable with a smile.

"Well it's kind of good to be back." Replied Andy.

As Andy, Mable and his former team mates began to talk Tabitha couldn't help but notice Andy glancing at Mable out of the corner of his eyes every once in a while. Lucky for him almost nobody else noticed … unlucky for him however Tabitha did.

* * *

**Confessional: It's good to be a confessional; know what I'm saying?**

**Andy: Alright! I've got a second chance at the money and I'm not blowing it again. I'll tell everyone about Tabitha's true nature at the first chance I get … but if she heard me she could send Kasimar after me. Hmm … I'll think of something. And Mable seems pretty happy to see me … this is going to be a pretty fun couple of days, maybe more if I last longer.**

**Mable: Yay! Andy's back! Ok, that may sound a little immature … but, well, maybe I could get to know him more. I don't know why but I really like that boy. I think with Andy back and Kasimar guaranteed to be sent packing soon all is well.**

**Tabitha: So Andy thinks he can expose me does he? Well I'm afraid not! I saw how he was glancing at Mable … time to put mum's blackmailing tips to good use I think.**

* * *

"So that's Daisy and Andy." Said Quana as she glanced at the two returnees. "So who's the third returnee?"

"Oh I'm glad you asked me Quana." Chuckled Chris. "It looks like Spider's bad feeling was bang on because the final returnee is none other than…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Nakia!"

Nakia calmly walked off the boat and onto the dock brushing her hair. She pocketed the hairbrush and looked over her former team mates with a glare.

"I vowed revenge on the night you traitors voted me off; and I'm here to make that vow come true." Growled Nakia.

"Somehow I doubt that is going to happen." Said Eleanor as she rolled her eyes.

"Shut up you little brat!" Said Nakia aggressively as her eyes scanned across her competition.

Her eyes landed on Spider who looked a little afraid; she smiled smugly and foully as she sashayed over to him.

"Well, well Spider … so we meet again." Said Nakia with a cruel laugh. "Been enjoying your time on the island? I hope you have … because those times of enjoyment are ending today. I can guarantee that you'll be walking the dock of shame tonight."

"But what did I *cough* ever do to you?" Asked Spider while taking a step back.

"Oh look." Sneered Kasimar who had been watching all this is amusement. "Looks like Bug is scared! Wimp! Yahahaha!"

"I'll tell you what you did! You have bad hair, you're a useless nerd and somehow you cost me the game by getting the others to vote me off!" Snarled Nakia as she took a step towards Spider. "Welcome to your worst nightmare Spider!"

Quana had seen enough and stepped between Spider and Nakia.

"Back off you little spoiled brat!" Growled Quana without fear. "Spider didn't cost you the game … you cost yourself the game! We kept Spider because he's kind, intelligent and is a genuinely nice person! We got rid of you because you're whiny, delusional, and useless … and you're as shallow as a dried up puddle!"

Nakia looked intimidated for a moment but quickly looked smug.

"You know Quana; I'd happily be your friend, you're; you're popular and your hair is very nice … but the fact is I really pity you." Said Nakia with a sneer. "I pity you for having the foolishness to date that nobody!"

"Whoever I date isn't any of your concern! What are you? My chaperone?" Growled Quana. "If you want to see a nobody then look in the mirror!"

"Whatever; you must either be retarded or just plain stupid to have such a bad choice in boys." Shrugged Nakia.

"LET ME AT HER!" Roared Quana as Barney, Spider and Andy held her back. Nakia for a brief moment looked _terrified_ but quickly shook it off when she saw Quana was being held back.

"Isn't this great?" Laughed Chris sadistically. "I can see a whole lot of drama coming up in the next few days! Haha! And you may want to know that Andy is bunking with the Team Puzzle guys, Daisy with the Team Jungle girls and Nakia will be with the Team Puzzle girls! Haha!"

There was silence for a moment and before several campers could voice any complaints Chris continued speaking.

"The interns will be taking the returnee's belongings to their allocated cabins … but in the mean time its time for today's challenge." Said Chris looking excited. "And some of you may enjoy this one."

"Can we kill anyone?" Asked Kasimar hopefully.

"You can write about it." Nodded Chris. "Now … to the mess hall … awaaaaaay!"

* * *

**Confessional: To the Batmobile!**

**Nakia: Back where I should be at last! These losers don't stand a chance against me; most of them are nerdy, unpopular, completely weird and have bad hair. I think I stand an almost guaranteed chance at winning the million. And mark my words … **_**Spider**_** will suffer.**

**Quana: Aw dammit! Nakia's back … well; the peace was nice while it lasted. That girl is nastier than any other girl I've ever met! She's my arch enemy. If she tries to hurt my little arachnid then I'm not holding anything back! Poor Spider … I hope he's ok.**

**Spider: **(He looks afraid). **Oh no, oh no, oh ***cough*** no! Nakia's going to kill me ***cough* **or worse! What did I do to ***cough* **deserve this? I felt so happy this ***cough* **morning and now I feel like Squidward. I could ***cough* **really use a hug right about now; maybe ***sneeze* **Quana could provide?**

**Uzuri: Daisy doesn't look like she'll be a very good bunk mate … I hope Tabitha has a plan. Daisy seems so mean and I don't want anyone yelling at me! I wish you were here Vinnie, I miss you already. **(Uzuri blows a kiss to the camera).

* * *

The fifteen campers soon found themselves in the mess hall … but something seemed different. Perhaps it was to do with the fifteen computers that had been set up around the room. Upon seeing this technology and the possible opportunity some campers were pleased.

"Finally some internet." Said Lavender. "I can check my emails!"

"And I can watch cartoons online." Added Jimmy with a grin.

"And I can watch porn!" Said Kasimar with a rather nasty grin.

Everyone turned to Kasimar in disgust.

"There are kids present you lout!" Hissed Lavender.

"Oh shut up you little whore!" Snapped Kasimar horribly. "Otherwise I'll cut off your sweet breasts!"

Some campers gasped in repulsion to Kasimar's threat; Oscar quickly prepared to take action but Barney got there first.

WHACK!

Barney punched Kasimar right in the nose; a small crack sound signified that Barney had broken it.

"Don't speak; just listen." Said Barney calmly as Kasimar looked afraid. "You had better **not** say that again, I **promise** that you **will** be **very** sorry if you say **ANYTHING** like that to Lavender again! Got it?"

Kasimar whimpered and nodded as Barney nodded his head in satisfaction.

"Good." Said Barney as he adjusted his hat so it was straight. A few campers gaped at how easily Barney had dealt with Kasimar and stared at the pirate in respect.

"What?" Said Barney when he noticed a the stares. "I don't like it when horrible people say things like that to my friends.

* * *

**Confessional: A broken nose is not a good pose.**

**Kasimar: **(He has a bandage around his nose and looks in deep pain). **That little rat! Its so on now! I'll get even somehow! Ow … this hurts so much. Owie! **

**Lavender: That was so honorable and brave of Barney to stand up for me like that. **(Lavender swoons and blushes). **What a guy!**

**Andy: Go Barney! We've all wanted to do that; he'll be feeling that tomorrow! Yebehbeh! **

**Barney: Is it wrong to say I enjoyed doing that … no it isn't maties! Shiver me timbers that bully is so low down.**

* * *

"Can we get the attention back to me?" Whined Chris like a toddler. "Its time for me to announce the challenge!"

"Can we check our emails first?" Asked Eleanor. "I might have mail from the ferret club."

"No can do! These computers have absolutely no internet in them." Smirked Chris. "But they do have Microsoft word! And that is going to be important in today's challenge."

"Darn it! I wanted to play scary games!" Pouted Uzuri.

"Too bad! Now; for today's challenge you are going to unleash your inner ultra nerd and write fanfiction about Total Drama letterz."

"Does it have to be about this season?" Asked Oscar. "I have an idea for writing something where Tyler didn't get the boot in phobia factor."

"Sorry … not! It has to be about this season. It can be about past challenges, your lives outside the show, a shipping fic, the list goes on!" Said Chris enthusiastically.

"But fanfiction is for losers!" Said Daisy haughtily. "And I'm no loser!"

"Well it's either this or risk getting voted off tonight." Said Chris with a smirk.

Daisy frowned and stayed silent.

"Now; for those of you who are unaware of what fanfiction even is, let me explain." Said Chris. "It's, in a nutshell, when a fan writes a story about a TV show, video game, cartoon etcetera. However! You cannot write anything past T even thought M rated stuff would probably be hot. Haha!"

"You're a sick little man Chris." Said Xaria with disgust.

"Oh whatever!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; there is no real limit to the amount of words you can wrote, just make it good. The top four stories win immunity and the first place winner gets a special prize. Everyone else is fair game at the Bonfire Ceremony! Haha!"

"Is that all the rules?" Asked Andy doubtfully.

Chris thought for a moment and remembered something.

"Oh …and one more rule …

…

…

…

…

No pairing me up with Chef! That's just sick … ok?"

"Oh great! Now you've put the idea into my head!" Taunted Barney.

"Shut up!" Snarled Chris. "You all have three hours to write the best, but probably crap, stories you can. And no sharing ideas! I want this to be all original!"

* * *

**Confessional: Why aren't there any fanfictions written about me? I'm an interesting character!**

**Kasimar: Fanfiction is gay as a faggot … but I have a pretty good idea how I can do this without having to try. Yahaha! The look on those wusses faces when I win immunity!**

**Uzuri: I have such a great idea! SAW meets total drama letterz! Let's see how the jigsaw killer tortures Chris! Teehee!**

**Nakia: Like, Fanfiction is for nerds! Well, I need immunity … so I'll make do. And you know … I think I've just thought of a great idea! This will be as easy as making Spider walk the dock of shame!**

**Spider: This probably sounds** *cough*** really stupid … but maybe a fluffy romance between ***sneeze* **me and Quana would be a good** *cough*** story. I just hope Nakia's story isn't** *cough*** about me dying.**

**Quana: I've got just the thing to write about. The two things I love most! Singing, of course … and my little arachnid spider! Hahaha! **(Quana blushes and smiles).

**Andy: I wrote a fanfiction once about star trek; it got twenty reviews if two days as that's a popular fandom. Hopefully I'll do just as good here.**

* * *

Soon the fifteen campers were typing away on their computers, some facts, some slow, some eager and some very reluctulently. Chris looked over them and smirked.

"Remember to use spell check everyone! I don't want it to feel like I'm reading the work of an internet troll!" Advised Chris before turning to the cameraman. "Well there you go; three campers are back and the challenge as began. It may not be so dangerous but all the same we can laugh at the losers! Haha! So which four of these losers will win immunity? Who is going to suck at writing? Will anyone impress the magnificent me? Will Nakia get revenge of Spider? And who will be the next person to walk the dock of shame? Find out after the break when we return to Total Drama Letterz!"

"And cut! We're off the air." Said the cameraman.

"Good! I have two hairs out of place! Two!" Whined Chris childishly. "And I need a latté so friggin badly! I'm gonna have a nap, watching these losers write for three hours will be pretty boring."

"We can here you ya know." Said Oscar from his seat as he typed.

"Whatever!" Whined Chris as he went to have a lie down.

* * *

So the fifteen campers are writing Total Drama Letterz fanfiction? That ... probably won't end well. Who's stories are going to rule and who's stories are going to drool? More importantly who is getting voted off in the next chapter? Find out when you read chapter thirty three of Total Dramna letterz!


	33. Day 15, Part 2, Fantastic Fanfic funk

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do now own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his super duper awesome story Total Drama Alphabet which, may I add, inspired me to write this story. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them ok? Thank you.

**The warning: **This chapter contains love, kissing, bullying, hair related discrimination, fanfiction both good and bad and more blackmail. Nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana **BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **I'm back to school and exams are coming up. Oh boy that won't be fun at all. Other than that I don't have much to say … I'm tired. Enjoy the chapter and prepare to laugh!

Total Drama Alphabet is a must read!

* * *

"Welcome back to Total Drama Letterz!" Said Chris dramatically. "When we left off the fifteen losers that we call contestants were writing Total Drama Letterz fanfiction … obviously most of it is going to suck … but maybe, just maybe some of them will be passable, just barely."

"Yeah; like you could write anything better." Said Xaria with an eye roll.

"I so could!" Whined Chris. "But it doesn't matter. Anyway, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted; these fifteen losers have spent the past three hours writing fanfiction and now they have all finished. I have all the stories on a five gigabyte memory stick and we shall now be reading them."

Chris held up a memory stick with the Total Drama Letterz logo on it while Chef Hatchet placed a projector on the table and hooked it up to Chris's laptop.

"We will be picking the order the stories are read in a completely fair way." Said Chris as he held up a bag. "Inside this bag are fifteen coins; each has the mug shot of one of you fifteen idiots on it. Whoever I pick out will have their story read. Now … let's get it on!"

* * *

**Confessional: I'd write fanfiction if I had hands. But an outhouse with hands is apparently not very 'practical'.**

**Jimmy: I think my story came out very good. I just hope Chris thinks the same; still, what's not to love about twist endings right?**

**Oscar: I think I did a pretty good job … it might piss Kasimar off … but in that case so much the better. Xaria's probably going to like it as well.**

**Eleanor: I really believe I captured the alternate reality aspect of the fanfiction. Chris may be a 'tiny' bit annoyed but I had a lot of fun. Hopefully it will amuse some of you as well.**

**Andy: As I said before I wrote a fanfiction on star trek a year or two ago. I just hope I've still got 'it' in me. Well; it's funny anyway. And if you want to be an astronaut you've got to start somewhere right?**

**Kasimar: This challenge was pathetic! But I know I've won immunity already. When Chris says fanfiction he means write about him. So while those douche nozzles are writing love, caring and sharing and that sort of bullshit … I wrote about Chris. I think he might like it.**

**Spider: I really hope my ***cough* **fanfic doesn't suck; I tried ***cough* **really hard. I think Quana is ***sneeze* **going to like it … I just hope ***cough* **Chris does too. Though I did remember the ***cough* **golden rule … don't insult Chris and ***gag* **his giant ego.**

**Uzuri: That was so much fun! Teehee! I really think the others are going to like this … maybe not Chris but he's a big meanie anyway. I especially liked the part with the giant fish hook and the baseball bats! **

**Barney: Yaaaaar! My story put me in my rightful place as captain with me hearties as me crew, Lavender as me sea lass and Chris and Kasimar walking the plank. Best of all I really enjoyed writing it! Yohohoho!**

**Nakia: **(Nakia is brushing her hair).** This is gonna be easy! I wrote what could be considered my best work ever. Today is gonna be a great day; I've returned, Spider is going to lose and I'll win immunity. Life is good for me and my lovely hair.**

**Mable: I thought I would write about one of the best moments of this show … when Kasimar got stuck in the torture chair. I amped it up a bit for laughs of course; this is going to be fun!**

**Daisy: As I'm the only person on this show who is any god I wrote about myself; a perfect day for me at school. I doubt any of the others could write anything even quarter way decent so it's obvious I'm going to win.**

**Lavender: This challenge was so relaxing; it helped me vent out my frustrations harmlessly. I decided to write a story where Barney and I work together to bring about Kasimar's downfall. Too bad it's not real eh?**

**Quana: Easy is one word to describe this challenge. I don't know if I'll win immunity or not but I had a good time writing. And thinking of lyrics for the song was fun as well.**

**Tabitha: I wasn't sure what to write at first … but then a stroke of inspiration hit me. I don't care about immunity; I have a plan on how to get Andy to keep his mouth shut. And this story should make people think I'm pretty nice so it'll help me in the long run.**

**Xaria: I don't know about you guys … but Nakia's grudge on Spider because of his **_**hair**_** of all things is **_**friggin**_** pathetic … and so I wrote a story based on that. If only what I wrote could actually happen eh?**

* * *

"Ok then." Said Chris as the campers got seated around so that the fanfiction could be read. "I don't have very high hopes for your stories … but prove me wrong! Haha! Let's see who the first story is going to be written by."

Chris reached into the bag and rummaged around for a few moments; the campers soon got impatient.

"Could you, oh I don't know … hurry up!" Demanded Nakia.

"Don't rush me! I'm drawing out suspense!" Hissed Chris. "Ok; I've got a coin, let's see whose story we are going to read first."

Chris took out a coin; the coin had Uzuri's face on it. She had a big smile and seemed to be cross eyed.

"Ok then; looks like Uzuri's story is first." Said Chris as he pressed a button on the laptop. "Let's hope it doesn't stink as much as Patch."

"I hope you like it." Said Uzuri with excitement.

* * *

**Chris meets the Jigsaw Killer**

_It was a dark and stormy day in Jigsaw's lair. People were dying, carnivorous birds were flying and Jigsaw had a new victim too._

_Chris Maclean, the sadistic bullying host of the Total Drama Series was in a tight squeeze … well, more accurately he was on a sharp hook. You see; Jigsaw had impaled him through the gut onto a giant barbed fish hook and tied Chris's hands behind his back with wire … the barbed kind._

_Chris's eyes flickered open and he immediately felt he had not got the 'guts' to stand up for himself! Teehee!_

"_What's going on? Why is there a novelty sized fish hook through my gut? And does my hair look alright? Waaaaah!" Sobbed Chris as he realized his predicament._

_A TV screen over the other side of the room flickered into life and Jigsaw was there watching Chris with a blank expression behind his bloody pig mask._

"_Hello Chris … I want to play a game." Said Jigsaw in a spooky and spine chilling voice._

"_Can it be the game where I get to play uncle with children?" Asked Chris hopefully._

"_No, You don't get to pick the game … the game I want to play is called deathtrap. Do you know why I have bought you to my humble home?" Asked Jigsaw without emotion._

"_To get tips for hurting people?" Smirked Chris._

"_No. You are here because you have to repent your sins. In your childhood you were a bully, in your high school years you snuck into the girl's locker rooms after cheer leading practice … and now you abuse and discriminate contestants on Total Drama Island. I know this because I have cable. And beyond all that there is another reason … you didn't give your grandmother a birthday card last week!"_

_Chris blinked and reached into his pocket; he looked over his to do list and saw he had forgotten to get his grandmother a card._

"_So? What are you going to do about it? OW!" Wailed Chris as the hook raised upwards a little._

"_I'm glad you asked me Chris." Chuckled Jigsaw quietly. "I have injected you with a serious case of AIDS. You must free yourself from your hook shaped prison by severing your lower body off and getting the syringe on the other side of the room; if you do not manage that in an hour or refuse to do so … you'll only be 'halfway' decent. Live or die … the choice is yours._

* * *

"Ok; I think I've seen enough of this!" Said Chris as he quickly crossed off the story. "Why? That's all I ask you! Why?"

"Because it was something I wanted to write." Reasoned Uzuri. "And you didn't even read the bit where you are sliced in half and sold at Jigsaw's cousin's butchery. I bet everyone else liked it right?"

Everyone else looked a little disturbed by what they had just read. Sure Chris was evil … but even _that_ might have been a little extreme. Kasimar clapped and looked very mildly impressed.

"Despite the fact you're a complete masochist and a freak that was funny!" Laughed Kasimar. "If only that was real; I love to see Lavender and Bug impaled on fish hooks! Yahahahaha!

Oscar punched Kasimar without looking at him and Kasimar fell out of his seat.

"The plot was pretty good." Complimented Xaria. "Though you tend to go a bit over the top."

"The sky's the limit! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional: What would happen if Scooby Doo met the Jigsaw killer?**

**Uzuri: I don't think Chris liked my story very much. If anything portrays him in a negative light he hates it. What a spoilsport!**

**Jimmy: I didn't really like that story too much … but as I'm not fond of horror in general I guess it's excusable.**

**Chris: I hate Uzuri! **(He pouts like a child).

* * *

"Ok; I think we can mostly agree that Uzuri's crappy story won't win immunity." Said Chris angrily as he reached into the bag again and pulled out a coin with Nakia's smug smiling face on it. "Let's see if Nakia can do any better than Uzuri."

"I'm sure I can get immunity." Smirked Nakia confidently.

"Here's hoping she doesn't." Whispered Quana to Spider.

"I hope she doesn't *cough* too." Agreed Spider.

Chris got the story up and the reading began. When the campers read it they felt they should have seen in coming…

* * *

**A perfect head of hair**

_Nakia Sommo Baxter sat in her large and luxurious room in her family's mansion. Just a week ago she had won Total Drama Letterz and left all the bad haired losers in the dust; they just never stood a chance. Currently Nakia was brushing her hair and resting her feet on her new footstool_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

"_Excuse me Mistress *cough* Nakia." Said Spider, Nakia's footrest. "Can I take an inhaler *cough* break? I feel really sick."_

"_You should have thought about that before you voted me off." Said Nakia very correctly as she brushed her perfect, wonderful, silky and perfect hair. "It feels so good to be the winner! I said I'd get revenge and I did … didn't I?"_

"_Yes you did *cough* Mistress." Agreed Spider the pathetic idiot. "You are far better than me *cough* and I deserved to be made your *sneeze* slave and be disowned from my *cough* family."_

"_Good; maybe I'll actually feed you tonight." Laughed Nakia at her bad haired slave "Now stay still; my hair longs for a brushing._

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

_Brush … Brush … Brush_

* * *

"STOP!" Yelled Jimmy: "This story is making my brain throw up! Why is Spider Nakia's slave? Slavery is illegal nowadays."

"He's my slave because nobody liked him." Explained Nakia. "But Spider deserved his fate, if only it was real … anyway; the main character was me of course, just as I should be!"

"Good gosh you're pathetic." Said Quana irritably while Spider looked a little glum. "Saying Spider should be disowned by his family and become a slave? And for _what_? Having bad hair … you're delusional at worst!"

"She's right you know." Said Chris with a nod.

"Oh … thanks Chris." Said Quana in surprise.

"Yeah; Nakia doesn't have the best hair … I do! Haha!" Laughed Chris arrogantly. "Well; I don't think this one was very good at all … but it's better than Uzuri's story anyway."

Nakia growled and crossed her arms at her story being called not very good. Some of the others looked at her disapprovingly.

* * *

**Confessional: Have a heart, gain a brain and maybe have a pinch of courage too.**

**Nakia: The truth is that they just don't like hearing the truth. Someone of refined high social status is significantly better than those peasants. Poor bastards.**

**Spider: That … kinda hurt my** *cough* **feelings a little. Do I ***cough* **deserve the hatred because** *cough*** I don't think so. I must be a ***sneeze* **wimp to be afraid of someone like** *gag*** Nakia. **(Spider sighs sadly).

**Tabitha: Nakia's grudge on Spider is just plain pathetic; if you're going to hate someone at least have a good reason for it … I don't see Nakia getting very far … but then again;, maybe Nakia's bratty attitude and God complex issues could be helpful … hmm.**

* * *

"So far all of you are sucking quite a lot it seems." Chuckled Chris as he pulled a coin with Eleanor's smiling face out of the bag. "Perhaps Eleanor will show that you aren't all completely useless."

"Were not useless." Said Mable crossly. "Your standards are just ridiculously high and you hate it when we write things against you!"

"Well its not easy being the best guy in the universe." Said Chris with an arrogant smirk. "Now lets read this probably stupid fanfiction."

* * *

**Animal Kingdom**

_Eleanor had a great life. She had such a fantastic time she felt like she was queen of the jungle … literally! Today was the first anniversary of the day she became queen of the Eleanoria jungle._

_Currently Eleanor was watching a group of ferrets on stage performing acrobatics as ferrets are naturally flexible creatures. Seated with her at the table were her friends Jimmy, Quana, Spider and Barney. As they watched the act they ate toffee popcorn and drank purple juice, it was called that because it tasted like the color purple._

"_This is great Eleanor me heartie!" Laughed Barney. "These ferrets are so talented! How did you get them to do that?"_

"_That's a secret you have to be queen of the jungle to know." Replied Eleanor._

"_It was so nice of you to invite us to the jungle after you won Total Drama Letterz." Smiled Quana as she leaned against Spider since the two were dating. "And I love Kasimar's new look! Hahahahahaha!"_

"_So what are we doing next?" Asked Jimmy as he began to feel the effects of a sugar rush. "Can we go to the soda falls on the marshmallow plains?"_

"_Of course we can." Beamed Eleanor. "Looks like the show is nearly over; we'll go after it finishes."_

"_Sounds good; but first *cough* I'd like some mars bars." Said Spider with a cough; he was still unwell but Quana's love was gradually healing him for the better._

"_Right away; Kasimar, we need an MB over here, a mars bar. Chop, Chop." Called Eleanor to her Butler._

_Kasimar hobbled up with the mars bar looking angry. After handing it to Spider he pouted._

"_Isn't jungle magic funny?" Asked Eleanor as she and her friends began to laugh._

"_OO, AH, OOO OOOH AH!" Growled Kasimar like a monkey._

_Kasimar was filthy and hairy as he had … been turned into a monkey … a hairy, ugly and smelly monkey. His silly blue mohawk remained intact but he didn't care due to being plagued by fleas in his nether regions._

* * *

"Oi!" Growled Kasimar. "I'm no monkey you stupid asswipe!"

"Well I thought it was fitting." Replied Eleanor with a smirk.

Kasimar growled and drew a finger across his throat as Eleanor quickly looked away.

"I'm gonna stop reading the story now." Said Chris as he crossed off the story. "It was good … but it needs more Chris in it, duh!"

"It was my story and as I don't like you I decided not to put you in … and did you want to be a monkey?" Asked Eleanor.

"Only if I was sexy." Shrugged Chris.

While Chris started to pick out another person's story Jimmy smiled at Eleanor.

"That was a good story; especially how Kasimar was a flea ridden monkey." Chuckled Jimmy. "You're really good at writing stories."

"Thanks Jimmy, I appreciate that; but I doubt I'll win immunity." Said Eleanor with a small chuckle.

"Well its not whether you win or lose; its how you play the game." Said Jimmy philosophically.

"Unless of course that game happens to be Russian roulette yaaaar!" Pointed out Barney with a laugh.

* * *

**Confessional: In the jungle, the creepy jungle!**

**Eleanor: I don't exactly think it was fair for Chris to dislike my story because he wasn't in it. He has all the personality of a clump of seaweed.**

**Kasimar: That little brat! I'm gonna make her pay, just you wait!**

**Quana: Hahaha! I think the flea ridden monkey thing really suits Kasimar. Eleanor deserved immunity for that alone … but I think she'll be safe at the Bonfire Ceremony anyway.**

**Jimmy: If there's one thing I like about Eleanor its her sense of humor. And a soda waterfall … that sounds like fun!**

**Xaria: Kasimar as a monkey? … I can already see the resemblance. **(Xaria laughs in amusement).

* * *

"Ok; the next story is written by Kasimar." Said Chris as he held up a coin with Kasimar's angry snarling face on it. "I don't know what Kasimar's creative writing grade is … so this might just be interesting."

"I think you'll enjoy it very much Chris." Said Kasimar with a confident smirk.

"Just remember that if you don't win immunity you're off this Island tonight … so no pressure." Warned Lavender happily.

"We'll just see about that won't we?" Said Kasimar as Chris got Kasimar's story up.

* * *

**Chris Maclean is a super, fantastic, awesome, cool, lady attracting and all round great host**

_Chris Maclean … words cannot describe how much of a great guy he is! All the girls want him and all the guys want to be him … and the transgenderals wish they were him as well. Chris MacAWESOME is the only reason most of us don't kill ourselves out of depression. If everybody in the world was allowed one wish it would be to live as Chris Maclean. Since Chris is such an excellent awesome dude that we all wish we were; here is a list of the reasons that we all admire him._

_Chris is the handsomest guy in the history of forever._

_Chris is the awesomest guy in the history of forever._

_Chris has the best hair in the history of the universe._

* * *

"Stop it!" Groaned Lavender. "That story is stupid! He's just sucking up to you!"

"Yeah; lame!" Agreed Andy.

"Oh shut up you two idiots! This is a mature and sophisticated piece of fanfic perfection. Its going to be very hard to beat indeed. I'm really curious as to what happens at the end!" Said Chris with a huge smile at the laptop screen. "Good job Kasimar!"

"No problem Chris." Said Kasimar as he smirked at Lavender and grinned cruelly.

* * *

**Confessional: Why does nobody ever suck up to me?**

**Lavender: **(She looks visibly frustrated). **Kasimar didn't even try! And yet he seems set to receive immunity! This is so unfair … and I really don't want to lose to that monster. He'd definitely rub it in.**

**Oscar: Dammit! We were so close to getting Kasimar booted off … evidently he's going to be harder to beat than I first thought.**

**Kasimar: Those retards really are stupid to not try and suck up to Chris. Its so obvious he wanted stories about him. Well; I did so and it sure paid off. I can't wait to rub it in Lavender's pug ugly face when she doesn't get immunity.**

* * *

"I don't think anybody is going to do better than Kasimar with his masterpiece." Said Chris as he reached into the bag again and pulled out a coin with Daisy's face on it, she seemed to have a stuck up haughty expression.

"I think you'll find my story to be very interesting and deserving of immunity." Said Daisy confidently.

"I guess we'll find out right now." Said Chris as he loaded up Daisy's story.

"Let's get it over with." Mumbled Lavender.

* * *

**A Perfect Daisy.**

_Daisy was a perfect girl; she was intelligent, smart and better than anyone else. One day she had finished a calculus exam and had gotten an A+ as usual and everyone was congratulating her for doing so well._

"_Great job Daisy!" Said a lowly dunce._

"_You're better than us!" Cheered a useless idiotic eighth grader._

"_Why thank you." Said Daisy humbly. "I am better than you aren't I?"_

_Daisy proceeded to have lunch in the canteen on her own personal throne. All the lowly F grade students bought Daisy's five star food to her._

"_We are not worthy." Said one useless F grade student._

"_Please help mine with my homework." Said another._

* * *

"I'm going to stop right there." Said Chris as he closed down the story. "That was utter crap."

"And yet Kasimar's wasn't." Scoffed Lavender. "Though I agree that it was boring, dull and quite uncreative."

"Shut up you F grade rat!" Snarled Daisy. "You will show me respect at once!"

"Someone's got temper issues right me hearties." Said Barney to his friends.

"I command you to stop insulting me!" Spat Daisy angrily. "I'll have you expelled from your schools!"

* * *

**Confessional: Expellerarmous! **

**Daisy: Those insubordinate fools! How dare they talk to me like that! Well; it'll be all worth it once I get the million dollars. Those brats need to learn to respect their superiors!**

**Jimmy: Daisy's mean. And she can't actually expel us from our schools … can she?**

**Nakia: Daisy should learn to get a grip on her temper. Seriously; she almost as bad as Spider … almost.**

* * *

While Daisy sat down fuming silently Chris took out a coin with Andy's smiling face on it.

"Hopefully Andy is going to do better than the rest of returnee's." Said Chris. "Seriously; Daisy and Nakia's stories were abysmal at best."

"Well I think I did a pretty good job." Said Andy. "And I didn't degrade you in any way at all."

"That's good to hear." Smiled Chris in relief. "Anyone whose story that portrays me negatively will get a sizable deduction in their chances for immunity."

* * *

**Andy The Astronaut**

_Andy Takeshi was about to go where nobody except a handful of people had gone before. He was going into outer space to investigate a glowing section of the moon; it had a chance of being extraterrestrial life. Andy boarded his rocket (titled the Shooting Star) and awaited further instructions._

"_Come in Andy Takeshi; this is Ground Control, do you read me, over." Said a female voice over the transmitter built into Andy's space helmet._

"_Yes Mable; I read you loud and clear, over." Said Andy._

"_Good; your mission for today is very straightforward. Dr Doofi … I mean; you are going to be going to a remote part of the moon that nobody has been to before. Odd glowing has been spotted coming from there and its up to you to find out what is causing it. Over." Said Mable; Captain of the ground control._

"_You know I like a challenge; I'll get to the bottom of this mystery like last nights ice cream and I'll be back in time for eta as well." Said Andy as he strapped himself in and prepared for take off. "I'm ready for take off, over."_

"_Very good; I'm commencing the countdown, good luck Astronaut Andy. Over and out." Said Mable as she began telling the rest of Ground Control to start the countdown._

_Ten seconds later Andy's rocket was taking off at quite a speed. Normally travelling to the moon would take a while but with the new hypertechnogizmo warp drive Andy got to the moon in just five minutes. After carefully landing down onto the moons surface he stepped out of the safety of his rocket and began exploring, in a space suit of course._

_Soon he located the glowing; it was bright blue and coming from within a crater._

"_Ground Control; I have located the source of the glowing. It is coming from a crater and is as bright as neon. It reminds me of Tokyo. Over."_

"_God job Andy; I never doubted you." Said Mable over the receiver in Andy's helmet. "You'll have to go down there and investigate."_

"_Are you sure; I mean, its pretty far down and even in low gravity I still stand a chance of hurting myself … and I don't want to bust open my helmet; and then there's the … oh dear."_

"_Is something wrong Andy? Over." Said Mable in concern._

"… _I'll have to call you back Ground Control. Over and out." Said Andy as he gazed at the creatures looking at him._

_There was a group of at least a hundred aliens; but they all had one big similarity … they all looked exactly like Chris Maclean._

"_Dude! My hair is awesome! Haha!" They all said in perfect usion._

"… _I think I'll name these creatures … the Chris Macleanians." Said Andy as the Chris Maclean aliens stepped closer._

* * *

"Wow … that was actually a pretty good story." Said Chris as he finished reading; he looked a small bit impressed. "Nowhere near as good as Kasimar's story … but I really like this one. After all; I was in it! Haha!"

"Awesome!" Cheered Andy.

Most of the campers clapped for him; Andy took a bow and smiled. What he and everyone else didn't notice was that Mable was faintly blushing as she clapped.

* * *

**Confessional: Confessional Control to Major Tom!**

**Andy: I think I did pretty good with that story; most of the others seemed to like it anyway. I wonder what Mable thought of it.**

**Mable: That was nice of Andy tp put me in his story. I wonder if he likes me in that way. I'm probably just over thinking things but there must be a reason he picked me over the others to be in his story.**

* * *

"The next story is written by Barney." Said Chris as he held up a coin with Barney's genki grinning face on it.

"This ought to be *cough* good then." Said Spider as the story was displayed.

* * *

**A pirate and his Sea Lass**

_Captain Barney Scott Bolitho of his ship; the Majestic Lavender Wave, was having quite an enjoyable day out on the high seas. The sun was shining, the waves weren't too rough … and sharks circled the ship … perfect conditions for someone to walk the plank._

_As it happened Barney intended for two of his greatest foes to walk the plank of this fine day. His crew awaited orders and Barney and his first mate watched the two victims squirm while tied up and standing by the plank._

"_Yaaaaar ye scurvy dogs!" Said Barney as the waves rippled nicely. "The time has come for you to walk the plank! And I think me red haired mermaid shall do the honors of poking you in the backside with a sword! Yaaaar!"_

_Barney turned to his first mate and nodded. Lavender unsheathed her pointy sword and approached the two who would very soon be shark food._

_Lavender however was not wearing her cheerleading outfit she wore on Total Drama Letterz; instead she was wearing a leather pirate outfit which not only bared more of her midriff than her cheerleader outfit but also a hat with the feathers of many an exotic bird on them. She was as dangerous as hot cocoa and as piratey as an illegal copy of a DVD._

"_You heard the captain scallywags!" Smirked Lavender minxily. "Walk the plank! Lets start with you Kasimar!"_

"_No!" Wailed Kasimar as he began to cry like a three and a half seconds old baby. "Don't make me walk the plank! Waaaaaaah! Boohoohoo!"_

_Lavender paid no attention to the big bad bully and poked him in the butt with her sword. With one false move Kasimar wobbled and wobbled off the plank to the sharks below._

"_Yaaaaar! Bombvoyage Kasimar; enjoy Davie Jones locker!" Chuckled Barney. "Ok Chris Maclean; you made us walk the dock of shame … so now you can walk the plank of shame! Yohohoho!"_

* * *

Chris frowned as he closed off the story without finishing it and glared at Barney.

"Stop writing bad things about me!" Snapped Chris in anger. "You're being a meanie!"

"Meanie? Seriously? Is that the best insult you can come up with you trout kisser?" Smirked Barney. "And I bet mostly everyone else liked it savvy?"

Most of the others were smirking and laughing. Lavender was blushing in embarrassment in the way she had been included.

"Only Barney would think of that." She mumbled silently to herself.

* * *

**Confessional: Captain Confessional of Wawanakwa!**

**Barney: Chris needs to learn to laugh at himself; it helps with humility yaaaar! But yaaar boy! Lavender looks cute when she blushes!**

**Lavender: … Embarrassing as that was I'm oddly flattered Barney put me in his story. Maybe he likes me. **(Lavender giggles).

* * *

"The next story is written by Quana." Said Chris dully. "This one is probably going to suck but everything that isn't me does anyway."

* * *

**The soulful song of Spider**

_It was past the merge in Total Drama Letterz and Chris had become unoriginal again. The current challenge was a talent contest; Chris was ignoring the fact that this contest had already been done earlier in the season … but the campers didn't complain too much as they were a bunch of talented people with the exception of Kasimar._

_It was time for the last act of the night; Quana Chloe Silva was last to perform. As anyone who knew her could tell you, her talent was singing. Quana took center stage with her microphone as Chris sat on his fat ass eating potato chips at the judges table._

"_Ok Quana; lets see what you've got." Said Chris as he stuffed his ugly face with food. "I have a massage in ten minutes and I can't be late because I'm Chris Maclean, a nasty delusional man._

_Quana signaled Spider who was off stage to turn on the music. The tune began and Quana began to sing._

_On Wawanakwa Island_

_There lives a dear sweet boy_

_A slightly unwell guy_

_Spider is his name_

_He's polite and quite smart_

_He interested in art_

_He owns a Nintendo sixty four_

_And has completed Banjo-Kazooie_

_He was on Team Puzzle_

_Where he was among friends_

_He was a great teammate _

_And always tried his best_

_But Nakia acted like a prejudiced brat_

_She hated his hair how about that_

_She has vowed one thing_

_Revenge_

_Spider, oh Spiiiiiiiider_

_What is going to happen to you_

_The worlds much nicer_

_Whenever we're with you_

_Spider, dear Spiiiiiiiider _

_Winning is what you're going to do_

_A little ill but totally brill_

_I totally love you_

_I totally love you_

_Spider's drink was_

_Spiked with apple juice_

_He fell on the ground and_

_Turned pale as a ghost_

_We were all scared_

_For his well being_

_Will he be ok_

_And will he be alright_

_But thankfully it seemed that_

_Luck was on Spider's side_

_He recovered from his allergy_

_And hooked up with me_

_Its looks like a very well deserved_

_Happy ending after all_

_Not even Kasimar_

_Can spoil it_

_Spider, oh Spiiiiiiiider _

_Take me on a date to the zoo_

_The worlds much nicer_

_Whenever we're with you_

_Spider, oh Spider_

_Winning is what you're going to do_

_A little ill but totally brill_

_I love you_

_I'm so totally in love with yooooooou_

_Quana took a bow and the audience burst into applause. Spider clapped from backstage and as Quana walked up to him they hugged._

"_That was such a *cough* nice song." Smiled Spider with a cute blush._

"_You'll be feeling even better when Kasimar is voted off." Chuckled Quana._

_And indeed Spider did for later that night Kasimar was voted off and burst into tears like a little crybaby._

* * *

Everyone bar Nakia, Daisy and Kasimar clapped at the well written story. Uzuri sobbed and blew her nose into a tissue.

"That was … sooooooooooooooo romantic!" Said Uzuri with a sigh. "I wish Vinnie was here."

"That was a great *cough story Quana." Smiled Spider as he wrapped an arm around his girlfriend. "I'm really *cough* touched."

"Think nothing of it my little arachnid." Smiled Quana lovingly as always.

"Well I however hated it!" Jeered Chris like a jerkass. "Love is for sissies! And you broke the rules! You portrayed me in a negative light! I'm sure others will agree that it was awful, am I right?"

"Absolutely; it was just plain awful. You two shouldn't even be together, its disrupting the natural balance of popular people and deadweight in the world." Said Nakia haughtily.

"I hated it as well; mostly because Bug was paired up with that nice piece of ass who should be with a real man … me." Smirked Kasimar as he flirtatiously winked at Quana much to her disgust.

"I wish I knew how Chris was getting away with this out of control bias on the challenges." Muttered Mable.

* * *

**Confessional: Bias is so very bad.**

**Quana: I put so much effort into that story and Chris just sweeps it aside like trash? Well … at least Spider liked it.**

**Spider: How can you not ***cough* **love a girl who writes a ***cough* **song about you? That was so ***cough* **sweet.**

* * *

"Next up is Tabitha's story; I wonder how skilled the rich and the ugly are at writing. Haha!" Laughed Chris as he got Tabitha's story up.

"Laugh while you can Maclean; you won't be for long." Growled Tabitha in displeasure at the insult.

* * *

**Dethroning of a bigot king**

_It was time for another Bonfire Ceremony on Total Drama Letterz. Tabitha Amethyst Barrington had won immunity so she knew that she was safe from the vote … but what if one of her friends got voted off? No … Tabitha wasn't going to let that happen, not if she had anything to say about it._

_The final fifteen campers were seated on the stumps and logs around the bonfire ceremony wondering who would get voted off. Kasimar, Daisy and Nakia had all won immunity so it was fair game … or it had been until Tabitha "righted the wrongs"._

_Chris stood to the side of the Bonfire Pit because tonight Chef Hatchet was going to be running the ceremony as payment for having to wear so many embarrassing outfits._

"_Alright maggots; you know the drill." Said Chef like a loud drill sergeant. "When I say your name come and get a marshmallow and all that rubbish. However; tonight the votes were completely unanimous so I'll just say who has been voted off straight away."_

"_That's not very dramatic you amateur." Whined Chris like a bratty child.#_

"_Whatever pretty boy!" Barked Chef. "You're not running this outfit. I am! Anyway; the big fat ugly loser tonight is_

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

_Chris._

"_What?" Said Chris in shock. "But you can't vote me off! I'm the host and I'm also not a contestant!"_

"_On the contrary." Said Tabitha with a smirk. "The contracts say that the __**person**__ with the most votes is eliminated; it says nothing about __**contestant**__. Goodbye Chris; its been a drudgery knowing you."_

_Chris screamed like a baby and began wailing as a fountain of tears burst from his eyes. Chef Hatchet dragged the nasty pretty boy down the dock of shame._

* * *

"What the #bleep#? Roared Chris in fury. "Worst fanfiction I've ever read! Completely crap! You've lost any chance at immunity!"

"Whatever." Shrugged Tabitha. "I aimed to amuse everyone else anyway."

Most of the campers clapped for Tabitha and cheered or at least smiled; one camper however just frowned.

* * *

**Confessional: Pretty boy is pretty lame.**

**Andy: So Tabitha is trying to get on everyone's good side? If I don't do something fast then she's going to be running this game in a short while. I'm sure that at the least she is a **_**tiny**_** bit nicer than Kasimar … but I'm not too sure.**

**Tabitha: Its simple really; remain under the radar and nobody will vote for you; that million is getting closer every minute. I saw Andy wasn't cheering … well; after the challenge I'll make sure he keeps his mouth shut; I have a good idea how to make sure he doesn't squeal.**

* * *

"Ok; maybe the next story isn't going to suck balls." Said Chris irritably after the clapping died down. "Maybe Jimmy will do a little bit better. I doubt it seeing as he's a little runt … but prove me wrong."

"You're just a little person trying to make us feel as little as you aren't you Chris?" Said Jimmy with a frown.

"Shut up and read." Snapped Chris.

* * *

**The invasion of the Mutant Marshmallows from Mars featuring dramatic plot twists**

_It had happened. An alien invasion had begun, but not just any invasion, oh goodness no. Earth had been invaded by mutant marshmallows from Mars. It wasn't very much fun for anyone unless you happen to have an unquenchable sweet tooth. Currently Jimmy Coryson was watching the news with a soda in one hand and a bucket of toffee popcorn in the other for comfort eating to clam his nerves. Sitting with him were his friends Ricky, Charles and Pablo. Ted had gone off to get supplies as the five kids were hiding out in the basement of Pablo's mansion._

"_Oh man; this is the end!" Gulped Charles. "I always thought the chances of a mutant marshmallow invasion were 162784219872348725 to one! I don't wanna die!"_

"_Give me support in this touch time Steve." Said Ricky to his lucky wrench._

"_Is this about your mum Ricky?" Asked Jimmy sympathetically. "I'm really sorry for what happened … but you're still got your dad right?"_

"_No … my dad IS my mum!" Lamented Ricky. "Oh the indignity of it all!"_

"_Pull yourselves together soldiers!" Said Pablo from the edge of the sofa. "These aliens have to have a weakness of some sort … and that weakness…_

…

…

…

…

_Must be weak."_

_At that moment the door burst open and Ted stood there holding a novelty come you'd get from the carnival._

"_Guys! Great news! I've discovered the alien marshmallow's weakness!"_

"_What is it? Don't leave us in suspense." Said Ricky excitedly._

"_Their weakness is…_

…

…

…

…

_..._

…

…

…

…

_Bullets!"_

* * *

"This story is so stupid!" Said Chris in frustration. "And seriously; what's with all these crappy twist endings? They suck!"

"I thought they were funny." Murmured Jimmy.

"Well shrimp I'm afraid they weren't." Sneered Chris. "Oh, you gonna cry little crybaby?"

"Leave him alone jerkass!" Frowned Eleanor. "It was twenty five times as good as anything you could write."

Chris just scowled silently.

* * *

**Confessional: Shrimp's go well on toast!**

**Jimmy: They say you can't do anymore than your best … in this case I don't think my best was good enough.**

**Daisy: **(Smirking).** Too bad to sad Jimmy. I told you on day one you were too young to be here. I bet you're wishing you'd listened to me now hmm?**

* * *

"Ok; my expectations are at an all time low." Said Chris as he pulled a coin with Oscar's face on it out of the bag. "Oscar may have muscle but everyone knows the trade off is being brainless … so I'm not expecting much."

"Oscar isn't stupid." Growled Xaria.

"Forget it Xaria." Said Oscar as he shook his head at Chris. "He's not worth it."

* * *

**Xaria beats up Kasimar**

_Kasimar wasn't a very nice guy, In fact, he was quite possibly the nastiest boy in the history of the human race. Its no wonder humanity is going downhill when ugly toe rags like Kasimar are on the loose._

_As it happened Kasimar was currently insulting Lavender._

"_You're a failed abortion and while a lot of people are worthless … you're most of them!" Sneered Kasimar before shoving Lavender to the ground._

"_You won't get away with this Kasimar." Said Lavender as Kasimar rested a foot on her gut. "You'll get your karma very soon indeed."_

"_And what makes you think that?" Asked Kasimar without much interest._

"_Because Xaria is on the scene." Smirked Lavender._

_Kasimar paled as he turned and saw the girl he feared the most. Xaria looked at Kasimar with a cold smirk and spoke one word._

"_Hello."_

"_Mooooooommmy!" Wailed Kasimar as he wet himself and crapped his pants at the same time. "Oh no! Now I need a new adult diaper!"_

_Xaria approached Kasimar and punched him to the floor … but she didn't stop there. She gave him third degree Indian sunburns, a purple nurple, cut of his mohawk and forcefully gave him a Polish Charlie Horse. But the torture didn't stop there._

* * *

Everyone in the mess hall was laughing … besides one person. Kasimar snarled darkly and raise a fist at Oscar and Xaria and drew his finger across his throat. His two opposes didn't notice as they shared a kiss and Xaria blushed.

"That was a great story; I wish it was real." Smiled Xaria. "But … what's a Polish Charlie Horse?"

"You probably don't want to know." Promised Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: It involves a telephone, chili sauce … and your ass!**

**Oscar: Well; Chris didn't like it … but Xaria did and that's a victory to me. Xaria's right; if only it was real.**

* * *

"Next up is Lavender's story." Said Chris. "Well; we all experience hell in our lives at some point right?"

"You certainly will *cough* after you die." Muttered Spider.

* * *

**Downfall of a demon**

_Total Drama letterz had come a long way; most of the campers had bitten the dust one way or another. Only three were left now, Lavender, Barney and much to everyone's dismay, Kasimar. Somehow he had weaseled his way out of all the eliminations and won immunity so many times. Though Lavender and Barney didn't want to admit it … Kasimar was a formidable opponent._

_It was currently the penultimate challenge; another game of Triple Dog Dare. Barney, being genki, fearless and daring, had managed to win fifteen freebies while Lavender had only got five. Kasimar didn't have any as he was too cowardly to accept most of the dares._

"_This is taking forever." Muttered Lavender to herself._

"_Ah come on Lavender, its not so bad." Shrugged Barney as he tapped his fingers on the table. "Kasimar might lose since he hasn't got a single freebie."_

"_But there has to be a way to make sure he loses." Said Lavender. "We both know HE doesn't deserve to win. Hmm … wait … I have an idea."_

_Lavender chuckled deviously but before Barney could ask her what her plan was it was Kasimar's turn to spin the wheel. After it stopped spinning the bottle pointed to Spider._

"_Ha! What could Bug think of that would be hard?" Chuckled Kasimar._

"_Well … Spider's dare is pretty brutal." Chuckled Chris. "His dare is to jump a high dive into a pool of shark teeth. But of course … you could pass the dare on…"_

"_I pass it on to Lavender." Said Kasimar promptly._

"_What's the mater? Too chicken?" Smirked Lavender. "That's just like you isn't it? You act all big and tough in hopes of getting respect when in reality you're an unloved meek little crybaby with no backbone. No surprise you can't take a simple dare really."_

_Kasimar has turned red in rage, he was snarling like a bull. Without a word he stormed up the high dive and leapt into the pit of shark teeth. He howled in pain as Barney and Lavender laughed._

"_Ooo, that's too bad." Shrugged Chris. "Looks like Kasimar is eliminated!"_

"_What? But I just did the dare!" Snarled Kasimar angrily._

"_Yep … but like with Heather, you didn't accept the dare." Smirked Chris._

_Kasimar blinked. A second later he began wailing and crying like a little baby as tears flooded down his face. What a pathetic little __**crybaby**__!_

* * *

"Yep … this one sucks too." Shrugged Chris as he closed the story down. "I don't like all this Kasimar bashing that is going on. He doesn't deserve it at all."

"What?" Said Lavender sounding totally shocked. "But you saw what he did to Gary and Raven!"

"And I laughed my head off; exactly, he's funny … just grow up you dumb brat!" Sneered Chris. "I really don't think you deserve to win this challenge at all."

"Shut your mouth right now Maclean." Growled Barney while sounding intimidating. "You've go four seconds to move onto the next story before I shave off your hair!"

Chris whimpered as he took a coin with Mable's face on it out of the bag and loaded up Mable's story.

* * *

**Confessional: Four … it's a magic number!**

**Lavender: All my life I've had to put up with prejudice … it's following me around like Wile E Coyote follows road runner. When will people learn that we're all equal?**

**Chris: Lavender sucks … and she does more than that! I bet she also sucks-"**

**Barney: **(From outside the confession). **If you finish that sentence I'll castrate you with a hacksaw!**

**Chris: **(He screams in fear and wets his pants).

* * *

"Ok; lets see what Mable's writing skills are like." Said Chris. "Maybe they'll be as stupid as her hair."

"Hey! My hair is cool." Said Mable as she gestured to her large blue ponytail. "And at least I don't have grey hairs unlike you!"

Chris screamed as he checked for grey hairs; he then snarled as everyone stared laughing.

"Grrrr! You rotten brats! Do any of you even deserve the million dollars?" Growled Chris pathetically.

* * *

**Torture chair troubles**

_It was the best day in the history of camp Wawanakwa and Total Drama. Kasimar was stuck in the torture chair. By his won bad luck he had picked a faulty chair … and nobody else deserved it even a millionth as much as Kasimar._

"_Let me out!" Wailed Kasimar. "I want my mommy!"_

"_Ok everyone." Said Mable as she held up the remote she had nabbed off Chris. "Lets raise the voltage to over nine thousand … and one!"_

* * *

Chris closed off the story without reading any further.

"I don't like that one." Said Chris flatly. "All this Kasimar hatred is so stupid. You should all know that, quite simply, he's better than you. So Mable loses any chance of immunity."

"But you didn't read all of Mable's story and you stopped reading because you didn't like it." Said Andy with a frown. "That's not fair."

"Too bad, life isn't fair." Smirked Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Where I try to be as fair as I can.**

**Mable: I wrote over twelv**_**e **_**pages and Chris just brushes it aside like trash! I tried my best at that; Chris is so****obviously tilting the game in Kasimar's favor. Are all reality shows like this? It was nice of Andy to stand up for me though. **(Mable smiles).

**Andy: That was so unfair! Its times like this I wish I had bought an electric razor with me so I could shave Chris until he becomes bald. I believe in karma … and Chris has doomed himself long ago. Karma retribution is an efficient machine.**

* * *

"Next up is Xaria." Said Chris. "Will she be the queen bee of writing? Let's find out."

"Dickhead." Muttered Xaria.

* * *

**Nakia's dilemma**

_It was a fairly normal day on camp Wawanakwa. It would have been a very good day if not for one thing. Nakia was whining about a single hair being out of place. She had been complaining about everyone's hair for the past few days so it was time for somebody to take a stand._

_Nakia was brushing her hair in her cabin and had been doing so for the past twenty three hours without taking even a one minute break. She failed to her somebody sneaking up behind her._

"_Oh what a perfect head of hair I have." Said Nakia as she stroked her stupid hair. "Now to continued with my pathetic grudge on Spider because I'm stupid!_

"_And soon you'll be stupid and bald." Said Xaria from behind Nakia._

_When Nakia turned she screamed as Xaria pounced on her and held her down as she started to use an electric razor to shave Nakia's hair off."_

* * *

The story reading was stopped by everyone laughing; everyone except Nakia.

"Silence! Don't laugh at me!" Whined Nakia like a toddler.

"Well; I liked that story." Said Chris. "As long as its not my hair being shaved I'm ok with it. Xaria may or may not be safe since we're not done yet."

"Good job Xaria." Smiled Oscar.

"That was funny!" Laughed Lavender. "Nakia's grudge on Spider is so stupid to be honest."

"Thanks guys." Said Xaria gratefully.

* * *

**Confessional: Shave or your beard will become itchy!**

**Xaria: I think I did pretty good; though Nakia might try to gun for me … ah whatever. She's too hair obsessed and dumb to be a real threat anyway.**

**Nakia: Xaria is such a stupid bratty little #bleep#!**

* * *

"Well that's fourteen of you; only Spider is left." Said Chris as he loaded up the final story. "Will Spider prove he has talent or will he fail? Let's find out!"

"There's no way Spider of all people could be talented." Smirked Nakia smugly. "I think I'm going to enjoy this; watching him fail will be very satisfying."

"None of you are talented." Scoffed Daisy. "With you losers as my competition I'm certain to win."

"Is your middle name ego by any chance?" Asked Barney with a smirk.

"Shut up you unpopular loser!" Snapped Daisy.

* * *

**The Princess and the Spider**

_Spider Lesley Garnet wasn't exactly a popular guy, quite the opposite in fact. He was always sick and ill and he had very few friends. He came to Wawanakwa island on Doctors orders. He expected to be voted off very early if not on the first day; and Nakia's constant bullying only enforced his inferiority complex. But then … he met a truly beautiful and pure hearted girl called Quana._

_Quana was a singer and as pretty as a freshly bloomed rose. She didn't treat people badly because of how they looked or where they came from; she judged them by what they were on the inside. Plus her hair smelt of strawberries and that was an added bonus in Spider's opinion. But what really made Spider like her was that she gave him a chance, which was a whole lot more than most people had ever given him._

_As the competition progressed Spider started to become 'twitterpatted' and fell in love with the fair singer. As he had never really had experience with girls Spider was going to ignore it … yet a rogue and chaotic good pirate taught him the tricks of the trade and ways of romancing a girl._

_Despite all the obstacles the sick sixteen year old faced he triumphed over them all; and in a twist of irony the person who set off his allergic reaction was in fact responsible for cementing Spider and Quana in the circle of life and love, so they would be together forever._

_As The princess and the Spider lay in each others arms while feeling like they were the only people in the world they each had just three words to say to each other._

"_I love you."_

_It goes to show that with any adventure, even one as twisted and crazy as Total Drama Letterz … living happily ever after is always in the realm of possibility._

_And let us not forget the final character of this story … Chris Maclean; for without his generosity of allowing Spider and his princess to be on the show their happy resolution would have never came into existence. Chris MacLean, generous and kind hearted man, a little rough around the edges but a diamond no less._

_The road ahead would be rough with the happy haired she devil Nakia back in the game … but love always finds a way._

* * *

Almost everyone broke out into thunderous applause; Spider blushed not only at the positive response but also Quana embracing him and kissing him on the cheek.

"Brilliant me heartie!" Cheered Barney.

"As lovely as SAW!" Giggled Uzuri.

"That … was so sweet." Said Mable with a kind and impressed smile.

"Thank you very *cough* much everyone." Said Spider politely

This applause was broken by two foul sounding laughs. Nakia and Daisy were both smirking and laughing.

"Your middle name is Lesley?" Laughed Nakia. "Just when I thought you couldn't get any stupider! Yeeheehee!"

"Yeah! You may all be pathetic useless losers … but spider is the biggest one I see!" Sneered Daisy.

Spider hung his head but Quana cheered him up with a nice hug. Chris started to clap.

"Spider … you're story was the opposite of what I thought it would be … meaning it was great! You really described me well. I think its easy to say that Spider is safe tonight." Said Chris with a rare smile.

"What?" Said Nakia in chock. "How can that awful haired idiot write a good story?"

"Did you pay ANY attention to the talent show?" Asked Quana flatly. "My little arachnid's talent is creative writing."

"Phfft; not as good as me." Said Daisy haughtily.

* * *

**Confessional: Romance is the building block of all life.**

**Spider: I did pretty good; well,** *cough*** I thought it would be ok … but I** *cough*** knew Chris wouldn't like it if I** *sneeze*** either didn't mention him or if I insulted** *gag*** him … so I sucked up to him. Shameful … but ***hard cough*** it worked right?**

**Quana: That was so romantic and sweet; Spider is such a good boyfriend. **(She smirks slyly). **I think I know someone who deserves a good cuddle! Heehee!**

* * *

"Ok; with that … I can safely say that most of you absolutely suck at writing fanfiction! You wrote about each other when you should have wrote about me!" Snapped Chris. "But some of you did have the kindness to write nice things about me … and now I have to choose the four who get immunity. This isn't going to be that hard really. In fourth place is…

…

…

…

…

…

Xaria as her story was pretty funny and not totally terrible unlike some."

Xaria smirked at Nakia who crossed her arms in a huff.

"In third place and also receiving immunity is...

…

…

…

…

…

…

Andy as he put me in his story in a very good way … he made me awesome!" Smiled Chris.

Andy looked satisfied and for a moment he thought he saw Mable look relieved.

"Second place shouldn't be too surprising; for putting me in his story and his general good writing the next immunity winner is…

…

…

…

…

…

Spider!"

Nakia fumed and crossed her arms which made some people roll their eyes.

"And in first place for his flawless and totally awesome story …and winning a copy of 'The Writers Bible' is …

…

…

…

…

Kasimar!"

"Yes! In your faces losers!" Cackled Kasimar snidely.

"Oh shut up you asshole." Frowned Lavender.

"Oh; and that reminds me." Said Chris as his sadistic smile came onto his face. "Lavender's story flat out sucked so she officially gets last place. Lets all point and laugh at her!"

Chris, Kasimar, Nakia and Daisy laughed at Lavender.

"Loser!" Jeered Daisy.

Lavender blinked and quickly ran from the mess hall looking fairly upset.

"Ok; those who haven't got immunity stand a chance at getting voted out at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony. Vote for who you want gone … unless they have immunity." Said Chris as he briefly glanced at Nakia. "Until then you may do what you wish."

* * *

**Confessional: Challenge over; time to party!**

**Andy: I'd better warn the others about Tabitha … and quick. With luck she'll get voted off tonight.**

**Tabitha: Time to make sure Andy keeps his mouth shut; blackmail is such a wonderful thing.**

* * *

Andy was leaning against a tree in the woods; he was thinking about the best way to quickly and safely expose Tabitha as if she found out she would probably try to send Kasimar after him.

"What to do? Hmm … maybe if I tell the other guys from team then we can spread the word quickly." Pondered Andy before suddenly scowling as Tabitha approached him. "Oh … hi Tabitha."

"Good evening Andy; how are you?" Asked Tabitha idly.

"I'll be feeling better after the ceremony tonight." Said Andy casually. "Need something?"

"Yes; I do." Said Tabitha with a nod. "I know that you know the real me; you're going to expose me aren't you?"

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't." Said Andy with a smirk.

"Well; I presumed we might hit this little snag … so I think I'll #set my cards down'." Said Tabitha with a devious grin. "I just so happen to know for a fact you like Mable … a lot."

"What of it?" Asked Andy suspiciously.

"Let's put it this way … if you try to tell anybody about me and my strategy … then I'll arrange an 'accident' for Mable. She'll be leaving the island in ten times worse condition than you did the first time." Said Tabitha nastily. "Love is everyone's ultimate weakness hmm?"

Andy was speechless; Tabitha was blackmailing him with Mable's safety? That witch!

"You … you … demon!" Said Andy in outrage. "That's terrible! Is a million dollars worth all this? Blackmail is criminal!"

"Its just strategy." Shrugged before looking Andy dead in the eye. "So; what'll it be? Speak and get Mable hurt … or stay silent?"

Andy was silent for a moment before lowering his head and sighing.

"I won't say a thing." Promised Andy in anger.

"That's a good boy." Smirked Tabitha. "You see; isn't it so much better doing what I say isn't it?"

Tabitha left the area while Andy groaned to himself.

"What now?" He said to nobody in particular.

* * *

**Confessional: Blackmail is such an ugly word.**

**Andy: This … wasn't what I expected. For Mable's sake I'll keep quiet … but I really want to expose Tabitha. I'm feel conflicted.**

**Tabitha: Andy just doesn't understand. I stand to lose a LOT more than anybody else if I don't win. **(Tabitha shudders for a moment). **Well; its all just strategy, nothing personal.**

* * *

Lavender sat on the steps of the Team Grenade cabin feeling fairly upset. Chris had singled her out and got people to laugh at her. He really seemed to hate her. She didn't show it … but all the prejudice, discrimination and insults actually really hurt her feelings a lot. But the worst part was that she had come last and Kasimar had finished in first. That really made her feel anguished.

"Why do I get so much hatred?" Asked Lavender quietly. "I try my best and I just get insulted for who I am. I do have feelings. Do I deserve this?"

"Of course you don't." Said Barney kindly as he walked up and sat beside Lavender. "Are you feeling down about what Captain Chris the crapper said to you me mermaid?"

"A little … or a fair bit. It's just … he discriminates against me." Said Lavender as she rested her head in her hands. "And the worst part is that Kasimar won immunity and first place yet he barely tried at all. Will he ever get his karma?"

"I wouldn't worry Lavender." Said Barney as he gazed up at the sky. "What goes around comes around; it's a rule of the sea we call life."

"Yeah … but not only did Kasimar win but I came last." Sighed Lavender sadly. "This is so humiliating."

"For what its worth your story was really good in my opinion yaaar." Comforted Barney.

"But I still failed." Said Lavender.

"Don't take it so hard me sea lass." Said Barney as he put a hand on Lavender's shoulder. "A life without failure is a life without experience. So what if you failed? Big deal! The Lavender I know never gives up ever yaaar!"

"You're right Barney … and I have to say I liked the story you write quite a lot." Said Lavender before giggling. "But did I have to wear a revealing pirate outfit?"

"Well … when you sexy you might as well show it off right?" Flirted Barney.

"Are you flirting with me?" Asked Lavender with a blush.

"Do you _want_ me to be?" Said Barney with a wink.

Lavender said nothing though what she didn't realize was that she was dreamily staring at Barney.

"Lavender; you're staring at me." Said Barney.

"Oh … am I?" Said Lavender a she quickly looked away.

"Its no problem me heartie; after all, I am pretty darn sexy." Smirked Barney. "As are you."

"Barney … do you … have a crush on me or something?" Asked Lavender as her heart rate increased.

"Yep, I think so." Replied Barney promptly.

"… That's so sweet … yet how can you be so … honest about it?" Inquired Lavender as her face turned very red.

"Denying your attraction to somebody gets you nowhere me dear." Explained Barney. "You've gotta be honest about it and it'll all work out; it did for Spider and Quana yaaaar!"

Lavender mumbled something as she smiled at Barney.

"Could you repeat that me heartie?" Asked Barney.

"Maybe it'll work for us too." Said Lavender as she smiled at Barney. "I've been denying it for a while … but I sorta, kinda, might definitely like you."

Both teens looked at each other and Barney spoke.

"Well; there's only one way to end this conversation." Declared Barney.

"How?" Asked Lavender.

"Like this." Said Barney as he put his arms around Lavender and kissed her; very quickly Lavender melted into it. After they parted a few moments later Lavender was in awe.

"Wow … you're a really god kisser." Said Lavender with a fiery red blush. "Though this seems quite sudden … and I'm somehow perfectly ok with that."

"As am I me red headed sea lass, as am I." Smiled Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: Why don't I ever get kissed?**

**Mable: While I'm happy for Lavender … I just lost five bucks. But I bet she'll have some stories to tell tonight eh?**

* * *

The fifteen campers sat around the Bonfire Pit; the sun had set and the moon and stars were now in the sky. It was a truly beautiful night and hopefully somebody nasty would soon be leaving … hopefully. Chris soon arrived with a tray of fourteen marshmallows and stood behind his oil drum as he surveyed the campers.

"Fifteen of you are here tonight." Noted Chris. "That's the largest amount in quite a while; soon only fourteen of you will remain. As I'm sure all you losers know by now marshmallows represent life, as long as you receive a marshmallow you are still in the game. I wonder who's going to lose tonight."

"When I call your name … come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The person who _does not_ receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means that you are out of the contest … and you can't come back … ever."

Some campers looked nervous, some looked confident and Barney and Lavender were too interested in each other to care.

"First up are those who won immunity. Kasimar, Spider, Andy and Xaria. You four are safe." Said Chris as the four challenge winners arose, Spider on crutches, and collected their marshmallows.

"Ok, now for those who are not immune." Said Chris. "The first marshmallow goes to … Jimmy."

"Barney"

"Uzuri"

"Oscar"

"Lavender"

"Mable"

"Quana"

"Eleanor"

"Tabitha"

Only Nakia and Daisy remained without a marshmallow; both looked surprised at this occurrence. Chris held up the final marshmallow and looked at them with a deadly serious expression.

"Nakia, Daisy … this is the final marshmallow of the night. Whoever doesn't get this is out of the competition … and both of you only returned today! Haha! But I digress; the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Nakia."

Nakia sighed in relief as she arose and claimed her marshmallow. She grinned smugly at Spider and began to brush her hair.

Daisy looked thunderstruck; she began to snarl and fume in anger.

"Well Daisy … time for you to go." Said Chris before he began to laugh. "Wow! First voted off and then voted off on the day you return! Haha!"

Daisy's eye twitched and she jumped up and snarled at the other fourteen campers.

"YOU STUPID #BLEEP#; YOU ARE ALL GOING TO GET EXPELLED FOM YOUR SCHOOL YOU BRATTY #BLEEP#. JUST YOU WAIT!"

Before Daisy could continue yelling a dart hit her in the neck; she wobbled and collapsed to the ground. The campers turned to Chris; he was now holding a tranquilizer gun and looked happy.

"This thing is a great investment! Haha! OK Chef; get her out of here." Said Chris.

Chef picked Daisy up over his shoulder and walked to the boat of losers. Within a minute the boat of losers set sail and took Daisy from Wawanakwa Island … this time for good.

"Well that was funny." Chuckled Chris. "As for your fourteen … you are safe … for tonight. Get some rest because the next challenge will be hard."

The fourteen campers left the Bonfire pit for their cabins while most felt much more at ease now that Daisy was gone … but Nakia still remained and that was a problem.

Chris turned to the camera and smiled.

"And there you have it! We now know hat most of the campers suck ass at writing fanfiction. And with Daisy gone fourteen campers remain. Who will be the next to lose? How will Barney and Lavender's relationship fare? How long will Andy keep quiet? And am I awesome? Find out next time on Total Drama letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Andy: Tabitha

Barney: Nakia

Daisy: Nakia

Eleanor: Nakia

Jimmy: Nakia

Kasimar: Daisy

Lavender: Daisy

Mable: Daisy

Nakia: Daisy

Oscar: Daisy

Quana: Nakia

Spider: Nakia

Tabitha: Daisy

Uzuri: Daisy

Xaria: Daisy

Total

Daisy: 8

Nakia: 6

Tabitha: 1

Losers: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again.

* * *

And Daisy is gone once more … truth be told I only returned her so I wouldn't have to boot the others …and as nobody really likes Daisy I think this is forgivable.

Next Time: Boot camp!


	34. Day 16, Part 1, Weight Loss Brown Moss

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet which is getting higher on the awesomeness meter every chapter. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so I would be grateful if you don't steal them!

**The Warning:** This chapter contains hair related discrimination, bullying, weight loss paranoia, some love, a sadistic host and manipulation by somebody other than Tabitha. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Ok; what can I say … how about SORRY! I apologize for not updating in nearly a month but I've been busy with my GCSE's at school (yes I am British). But the wait is now over and I should be able to update more frequently from now on. I'm not giving up on this story so there is no need to form an angry mob with pitchforks and flaming torches.

This chapter starts a sub plot that is going to run for a few chapters; also another interesting development takes place. Thank you for your patience everyone; so, without further apologies here is chapter 34 of Total Drama Letterz.

If I agreed with you then we'd both be wrong!

* * *

Chris Maclean stood once more on the dock of shame; he was dressed as a soldier and saluted the camera. He took out a rifle and fired a shot into the air; instantly a dead eagle fell down to his feet.

"Better not let Eleanor see that." Mumbled Chris before smiling for the camera. "Last time on Total Drama Letterz! The teams officially dissolved and the game became a free for all. Now it doesn't matter if somebody isn't a team mate or not; you can vote for anyone you want as long as they don't have immunity. And to increase the drama even more three campers returned!"

"Nakia, Andy and Daisy returned to the game and quickly made an impact. Nakia vowed to make her former team mates suffer. Andy wants to overthrow Tabitha and Daisy just wants to upset people. Throughout the day these three bought up the ratings."

"The challenge wasn't so dangerous … but it still sounded good in the planning stage. The fifteen probably talentless campers had to write fanfiction for Total Drama Letterz. Most of the stories weren't as good as I had hoped … but I guess I had set my standards too high; most of the stories flat out sucked."

"Kasimar's story was far and away the best of them all; he wrote about how awesome I am … which is completely true! Haha! He may be a bully … but he's a _smart_ bully."

"Some of the other stories, while not brilliant, were also good enough to get immunity. Much to Nakia's frustration Spider's story about himself and Quana earned the sick guy immunity … and we found out his middle name is Lesley! Let's hope people laugh at him! Xaria pulled off a win as well by writing about herself shaving Nakia's hair off. It's funny because somebody who isn't me suffers and I can enjoy it fully! Haha! Andy managed to guarantee he wouldn't be voted off that night with his story about going to the moon and discovering handsome aliens that look like me!

"Yet for every good story there is one that is _not_ so great. Uzuri's story implied my death! Inexcusable indeed! And Lavenders also sucked because, well, it's Lavender! Haha!"

"Andy, Spider, Xaria and Kasimar won immunity which left the other eleven as fair game at the Bonfire Ceremony. Andy would have told everyone about Tabitha's true nature but Tabitha got him alone and threatened Andy with Mable getting hurt if he told anyone. So it looks like Andy will be keeping quiet for a while. Haha!"

"It came down to Nakia and Daisy … unsurprisingly in my opinion it was Daisy that was voted off; right on the day that she had returned! Haha! I had to tranquilize her so she wouldn't go crazy and it felt very satisfying as causing pain always does.

"Who will be the next person to walk the dock of shame? Will Spider survive now that Nakia is back for revenge? Will Tabitha ever get exposed? And will any of these idiots get through boot camp? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

Calm was not exactly the right word to describe Spider just now; he looked quite worried as he worked on barricading the door of his cabin. Jimmy and Andy looked on in concern while Barney raised an eyebrow with a look of both amusement and concern like the others.

"Don't you think you're over reacting just a wee tad me heartie?" Asked Barney as Spider finished pushing the cupboard in front of the door.

"Not at all! You *cough* know how much Nakia hates me *cough*; she's going to _kill_ me or worse!"

"What's worse than death?" Asked Jimmy.

"There are more ways to *cough* permanently destroy somebody *cough* than killing them little buddy." Said Spider as he locked the door and slowly climbed up into his top bunk. "Its better to be safer than *cough* sorry; trust me."

"Well; I don't think that Nakia is really our main problem." Said Andy as he looked up at the underside of Barney's bunk. "There's someone worse."

"Aye me heartie; Kasimar is the true monster on this Island. He could kill someone while Nakia is about as dangerous as a mud pie me heartie." Said Barney in what he thought was agreement.

"Yeah … that's true." Lied Andy as he had actually been referring to Tabitha but couldn't rat out on her for Mable's safety.

* * *

**Confessional: Hold your tongue … for now.**

**Andy: I have always thought of blackmail as a very low form of manipulation. While I'm positive Kasimar is worse than Tabitha I really think she considers no tactic too low with hardly any exceptions. **(Andy rests his head in his hands). **You know … it would be a better world if bad people tried for some remorse.**

* * *

"Its good to have you back Andy." Said Jimmy with a big smile. "All four of the Team Puzzle guys are as one again. So … anything interesting happen at the Playa?"

"And do they have *cough* as good medical as Chris claims?" Asked Spider.

"The playa was very relaxing though competing is much more fun; a few things happened … but they are nothing too big." Said Andy. "And yes Spider; they have very good medical, its how my arm was fixed so quickly."

"Maybe being voted off isn't so bad if the Playa is as good as everyone says it is." Said Jimmy sleepily. "I wonder who's going to be the next to go."

"Could be anyone me heartie." Said Barney as he tipped his hat over his eyes. "I'm hoping its Kasimar but we can't have everything we want in life savvy?"

"But you hooked up with Lavender; therefore you got something you wanted." Pointed out Andy.

"Yep; she's my girl." Said Barney dreamily. "I'm just that attractive."

"I never thought of pirates as that." Said Andy. "Most look like you could get herpes just by looking at them."

"I'm more like Jack Sparrow yaaaar." Replied Barney.

"I just wish *cough* I was as adventurous and brave as *cough* Jack Sparrow." Lamented Spider. "Maybe then I wouldn't be such a target for bullying."

"Nakia is harmless." Said Andy. "Don't worry yourself about it; obstacles can all be overcome."

"I know that *cough* but being truly hated by someone is a *cough* horrible feeling; especially when you never *cough* did anything to them."

"Sufy." Said Barney casually.

"Sufy?" Said Spider blankly. "What does that mean?"

"Maybe it's a word used when you cheat in scrabble." Guessed Andy.

"Naw! It's obviously Greek for dread." Said Jimmy incorrectly.

"Ok; first of all the Greek word for dread is 'deimos'." Said Barney idly. "And second of all it's an acronym yaaar! It means "Stand up for yourself. And that's what you Spider are going to do to Kasimar and Nakia."

"…Well … if you're sure I *cough* suppose." Said Spider as he lay down. "See you tomorrow guys; I'm *cough* going to drown my sorrows in a *sneeze* dark sea of bad dreams and *coughed* sailor souls … I get creative when I'm upset."

Spider pulled the covers of his bed over himself and said no more. Barney and Andy exchanged glances while Jimmy pulled his hat over his eyes and shivered.

"I don't like emotional conflict." Gulped Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm conflicted by the lack of updates recently!**

**Barney: I may be a college graduate at teaching romance but when it comes to being a strong sea dog trainer … I'm lacking yaaar. Now … how to defeat Nakia without hitting her; you can't hit a girl me hearties.**

**Spider: Barney's right; I should ***cough* **try to stand up for myself … though when you're in the vicinity of two people who** *cough*** want you dead that's kinda hard to do … my** *cough*** persona lacks a certain appeal which is why they bully** *cough*** me until I squirm and I squeal.**

**Jimmy: I wonder how the girls are putting up with Nakia … I hope Eleanor will be alright.**

* * *

Quana felt like she had gone back to the beginning … back to the beginning of the competition that is which was the last time Nakia had bunked with her. Her patience was already wearing thin as Nakia had been brushing her hair for the past hour and had been counting out loud the number of brushes. Eleanor was in a similar position with her pillow over her head.

"One hundred and sixty seven, one hundred and sixty eight, one hundred and sixty nine." Said Nakia as she brushed her silky brown hair.

"Will you put a cork in it?" Asked Quana with a groan. "I'm really sleepy and I want to go to Spiderland!"

"Eew! Spider's are so gross." Gagged Nakia.

"I meant … never mind; you're so dumb it'll just float through your hollow head." Sighed Quana as she lay down.

"Don't be prejudice! It's what' on the outside that matters, not the inside!" Said Nakia angrily … and stupidly.

"You got that phrase completely wrong." Said Eleanor as she yawned and rolled over. "It's eleven at night! Stop brushing your stupid hair!"

"My hair isn't stupid." Said Nakia in offense.

"Sorry; you're right … you're stupid." Said Eleanor in a slightly snarky tone.

"… One hundred and seventy, one hundred and seventy one." Said Nakia as she continued to brush her hair.

"Oh for the love of all that is good and adorable be quiet!" Said Quana angrily. "I can see why Ulysses hates chatter!"

"Who?" Asked Eleanor.

"A guy at my school who loves the army and yells a lot." Said Quana as she lay down as Nakia continued to brush her hair.

Nakia smirked at the suffering of her enemy; truth be told she only brushed her hair eighty times at night but she kept going to upset her room mates; she was just that unpleasant.

"Hey; I think I just saw a shop selling hair brushes have its grand opening outside with ninety percent off!" Said Eleanor suddenly.

"Where?" Said Nakia eagerly as she ran out the door in her pajama's. Eleanor quickly got out of bed and locked the door.

"Finally!" Said Eleanor as she got back into bed and began to get comfortable for sleep.

"Why didn't I think of that?" Chuckled Quana. "That was very clever."

"Or it could be that Nakia is as dumb as a sack of peanuts." Mumbled Eleanor. "At least Frost and Dandelion slept through it."

Sure enough Eleanor's ferrets were curled up in their cage sleeping soundly; who knew ferrets were such deep sleepers?

"How long do you think it will be until Nakia finds out you pulled a fast one on her?" Asked Quana as she lay down to sleep as well.

"Probably an hour or two; as I said … dumb as a sack of peanuts."

Both girls shared a laugh and savored the wonderful silence as they began to sleep.

* * *

**Confessional: Why would an island have a hair brush shop? Wouldn't it be more practical to sell survival supplies instead?**

**Quana: I can just tell a number of sleepless nights await me as long as Nakia is still here. How can somebody love their hair that much? I'd feel a little bad for her if she wasn't so dumb and self centered.**

**Eleanor: Nakia said my hair is about as ugly as an ugly thing … even her insults are dumb. I like to think I'm nice … but I'm not sure if Nakia really deserves people being nice to her … she's got a LOT of growing up to do.**

**Nakia: Eleanor locked me out! Ooooo! That little brat … she's gonna pay … she's gonna pay … actually she probably won't considering that she'd have to be white inbred trash to have a hair style that ugly!**

* * *

The three team grenade girls were having a much more peaceful night than Quana and Eleanor had been having. It could be that they all got along … or maybe just that they had no hair obsessed morons bunking with them. Either way it was a much more peaceful atmosphere with not a single hair brush in sight.

Normally by now they would have been deep in the land of dreams … but you all know teenage girls right? Once a very close friend hooks up they _have_ to talk about it. Of course; being that I myself am not a girl ... yeah.

"Easiest five bucks I ever made." Said Mable as she pocketed the money Xaria gave her. "I knew you and Barney would get together eventually."

"Me too … but I lost five bucks." Grumbled Xaria.

"Five bucks isn't that much." Said Lavender as she lay on her bed.

"Well its five bucks I've got in my pocket that you don't have in yours." Chuckled Mable.

"You make an excellent point Mable." Said Lavender even though her mind seemed to be elsewhere.

"And speaking of excellent … you and Barney eh?" Smirked Mable. "Can't say I'm shocked; you've made googly eyes at him since you bonded in the fear challenge."

"I was in denial ok." Blushed Lavender.

"And the last step in acceptance." Said Xaria before smiling. "So … are you going to be sleeping with a picture of him under your pillow?"

"No; of course not." Said Lavender calmly. "That's just weird."

What Xaria and Mable didn't know was that Lavender in fact DID have a picture of Barney under her pillow; much to Lavender's relief it hadn't been discovered yet and hopefully never would be.

"So … Daisy's gone; what do you think about that?" Asked Lavender but Mable instantly saw what she was doing.

"Don't try to change the subject." Teased Mable. "So … is Barney a good kisser?"

"Why exactly do you have such an interest in other people's love lives?" Asked Lavender sounding embarrassed. "Isn't it a little … invading?"

"Barney does it too." Said Mable before smiling in an almost sister like fashion. "And you don't care about him doing it right?"

"Well yeah but…" Lavender trailed off and groaned. "Ok, you know what? He's a very good kisser and he makes my heart feel like a butterfly! Happy now?"

"…Yes; yes I am." Said Mable with a giggle.

"You sound like Phineas and Ferb." Groaned Xaria. "That show makes so little sense that it makes Peter Griffin look intelligent by comparison."

"Remember when Wallace said that sense had been removed from the dictionary?" Asked Lavender; Mable and Xaria nodded. "Yeah … that guy was a bit of a loon."

"Heh; I remember when me and Oscar fed him his own tainted star fruit." Chuckled Xaria. "I don't bully people … I just give them what they have coming to them."

"Revenge is a dish best served cold." Smirked Lavender. "Kinda like pizza; I _love_ cold pizza."

"I wonder what the next challenge is going to be like." Said Mable. "I bet it'll be something along the lines of bungee jumping into a volcano, whoever doesn't get fried wins immunity."

"Don't give Chris ideas." Warned Xaria. "Remember earlier in the competition we all confessed our fears and then had to face them? Don't give Chris anything he can use against us."

"Agreed; let's keep our mouths shut and not say anything stupid." Said Lavender as she and the others lay down.

* * *

**Confessional: You mean stupid as in drinking pee to save on water bills or stupid as in being like Patch?**

**Lavender: Its odd but now that I'm with Barney I feel as though Chris and Kasimar's insults will just bounce off me … strange feeling isn't it? Speaking of Kasimar I wonder how Oscar is putting up with him tonight.**

**Xaria: Not such a bad day all in all … I lost five bucks yes … but I won immunity and an unpleasant brat got voted off. Hopefully tomorrow will be just as good though there is every chance something bad could happen … still; Oscar is really helping me out of my negative attitude rut.**

**Mable: I don't really like volcanos; I was never really was a fan of human sacrifices … I'm no pyromaniac.**

* * *

Oscar was as usual trying to get some sleep but Kasimar was keeping him up. This time Kasimar was carving graffiti on the walls with a switchblade he had stolen from Chef Hatchet in his spare time. Currently he was carving things like 'Girls burn in hell', 'Die' and even 'Nazi's wuz cool'.

"You do realize that you spelt 'was' wrong right?" Said Oscar with a grumble. "Why exactly do you love hurting people and causing pain and suffering anyway; there has to be a reason, every villain has a Freudian Excuse."

"No reason; its just funny." Shrugged Kasimar as he pocketed the switchblade. "I mean; haven't you ever walked down the street, seen a happy young couple kissing and thought to yourself, 'if only I could sew their lips together, rip them apart and repeat the process until they die'?"

Oscar gaped in disgust and looked slightly disturbed.

"You are one sick #bleep#; you know that?" Asked Oscar after a few moments of silence. "And the Nazi's were anything but funny! Do you even know what they did?"

"Duh; they killed people by gassing them and burning their lungs … priceless comedy dude. Yahaha!" Smirked Kasimar as he lay down on his pillow.

"You know Kasimar; you may be laughing now and might feel confident, safe and powerful … but how long is it going to last?" Asked Oscar bravely. "Karma's a bitch and it's going to be brutal when it gets you … just keep that in mind."

"Oh shut up; what are you, a preacher?" Said Kasimar dryly. "Seriously; if you weren't dating Xaria I'd think you were a faggot and with good reason."

"… At least I'm not a coward." Said Oscar tonelessly.

Kasimar's eyes flared in rage as he sat up and snarled at Oscar.

"I'm … not … a … coward." Said Kasimar in fury.

"The first step in denial … eventually it leads to acceptance of what you are … which is a coward." Smirked Oscar.

"In what way am I a coward you pompous little shit?" Asked Kasimar angrily but quietly.

"Ok; here's the list … you bully little kids and are afraid whenever somebody stands up to you; you pushed Raven to a bear to save your own hide, you were the only person on the team that couldn't face your fear, you cry and wail at the slightest amount of pain … need I go on?"

Kasimar was stunned and in silence for a few moments. He opened his mouth and spoke three words.

"Go to hell." Spat Kasimar as he lay down and turned away from Oscar.

"Say hi to the devil for me when you get there." Said Oscar as he tuned out Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: If you rearrange Kasimar's name you get Mars Kai … is that a gang name?**

**Kasimar: **(He has his arms crossed and has an ugly frown on his face). **Some people respect their adversaries … but I show no respect to Oscar; what rattled his cage? I was just having some harmless fun. **(Kasimar smirks nastily). **Ok, not harmless but it was still fun. Yahaha!**

**Oscar: **(He appears to be attempting to meditate) **Chill … chill … chill … happy thoughts.**

* * *

Tabitha was sitting up in her bed just thinking; not only had the merge arrived but Andy was onto her. This presented a problem because even though he wasn't going to say anything there was always the chance he would say something when she was out of earshot. And then there was the fact that the others would vote Kasimar off at their first opportunity. All this as well as the fact Tabitha had to make sure Uzuri didn't know about her alliance with Kasimar.

"Wat'cha thinking about Tabitha?" Asked Uzuri as she lay on her belly while looking at her 'friend'.

"The usual; how to survive elimination, how to keep you safe, blashblahblah." Said Tabitha casually. "We're in the final fourteen now and this is where having allies becomes important … without them you'll walk the dock of shame quicker than Homer Simpson runs to a doughnut."

"Doughnuts are tasty; I love cherry icing because it looks like blood." Giggled Uzuri.

"Very nice." Said Tabitha uncertainly.

"Teehee, thank you." Smiled Uzuri. "So … what will we do tomorrow?"

"Heck if I know; the sooner I'm off this god forsaken island the better." Said Tabitha glumly. "With the money of course."

"Well it's not all bad; not for me anyway. I've got friends and a boyfriend … say, Tabitha, I just thought of something." Said Uzuri with a sudden look of thought.

"Please tell me it isn't about Silent Hill or gore." Said Tabitha hopefully. "No offense but I'm not too fond of the horror genre to be honest."

"Its nothing nasty … I just wondered … have you ever considered finding a boyfriend? That special somebody to spend your life with? Your soul mate?" Asked Uzuri wistfully.

"Not particularly; every single guy here is either hooked up, not my type, too young or a complete sociopath … and then I'd have to introduce him to my parents … and THAT wouldn't be fun." Said Tabitha with a mild shudder before quickly catching herself. "Basically … no; I prefer being single."

"Whatever you say Tabitha; lots of famous people are single like Shane Dawson anyway." Smiled Uzuri.

"He's a YouTube celebrity; he's not exactly 'famous'." Said Tabitha flatly.

"Well; ok, goodnight Tabitha, don't let the dream demons kill you in your sleep! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri as she lay down and closed her eyes.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm suddenly very afraid to go to sleep.**

**Uzuri: Funny thing about me is that I enjoy nightmares … particularly the one with the dynamite, the angry mailman and the army of zombies. Teehee!**

**Tabitha: You know … nobody has ever asked me about my relationship status before. None of the guys here really interest me. I may be a lot of bad things but I wouldn't get into an unloving relationship … if there even IS a guy out there for me I've not met him yet.**

* * *

In a few minutes Uzuri was asleep and Tabitha was left to just lie down in peace for a while; working with Kasimar was not fun. In fact, Tabitha was wondering if it was a wise move in the first place. Tabitha reasoned to herself that it would be worth it when she got the million.

Just as Tabitha was settling down for sleep there was a knock at the door.

"Go away!" Mumbled Tabitha as she tried tuning out the knocking.

The knocking started again after a few moments and Tabitha grumbled as she got out of her bed in her pastel purple pajama's and opened the door; standing there was Nakia and she looked cold.

"Oh, hey Nakia." Said Tabitha as politely as she could muster herself to be. "What's up? Isn't it a little late to be making a house call?"

"No; it's not too late." Frowned Nakia. "Eleanor locked me out of the cabin because she's jealous of my perfect hair and I need somewhere to sleep; Lavender, Mable and Xaria already denied me … so … can I come in?"

Tabitha thought for a moment; she didn't particularly like Nakia; she was quite a spoilt brat and was an utterly self absorbed idiot … but maybe she could gain her trust to her advantage.

"Ok fine; you can come in." Said Tabitha as Nakia walked in and she closed the door. "But I'm not getting you a cup of warm milk ok?"

"But I'm thirsty!" Whined Nakia pathetically.

Tabitha shook her head in exasperation as she got back into bed.

"So Nakia … congratulations on returning and all that razz … so; I assume you want to get back at Spider right?" Asked Tabitha craftily.

"Duh; he's unpopular, bad haired, unpopular and he's stupid." Pouted Nakia.

"_A little less than you_." Thought Tabitha to herself. "One second. Hey Uzuri; you awake?"

Tabitha's response was a soft breathing signaling Uzuri was sound asleep and couldn't hear them.

"Ok then; you know Nakia … I could help you get Spider voted off." Offered Tabitha. "I just need you to, well, vote with me for a while."

"I don't want Spider voted of … I want him broken!" Cackled Nakia madly for a moment. "You know … I saw what you did to Spider in the eating challenge … I approve."

"So; you'll join me?" Asked Tabitha with a grin.

"As long as Spider suffers I'm game." Nodded Nakia. "And who knows; maybe we could get his whore of a girlfriend voted off; she had the attitude to call me shallow; what nerve! I'm the one with the nice hair!"

"_Someone's got issues_." Thought Tabitha. "Ok then; but first I have one tip for you … try to stop talking about your hair ok? Seriously; if you keep going on about that and making people suffer based on their hair you'll be walking the dock of shame again very quickly."

"But my hair is wonderful." Whined Nakia.

"Maybe so … but if you don't stop obsessing over your hair and don't start putting full effort into challenges you'll be voted off at the first chance the others get, understand?"

Nakia thought for a moment, something she wasn't very good at doing. She wanted to win very badly but she loved her hair as well. Nakia nodded and Tabitha smiled.

"Excellent; from now on you're on my side; we'll get Spider at our earliest possible convenience. Until then I want to sleep." Said Tabitha as she lay down.

Nakia got into one of the beds and smirked to herself as she lay down.

"_Revenge will be mine_." Thought Nakia sinisterly.

* * *

**Confessional: Jerkass and Dumbass.**

**Tabitha: I'm not particularly fond of Nakia … but she's got about as much brains as a rock. She'll be pretty easy to manipulate … and seriously; bullying people based on hair … that's just sad. Still; now I have four people in my alliance counting myself. If I could get four others to vote with me I'd have the majority; I'm running this game like how an athlete runs a race!**

**Nakia: **(She looks quite smug). **One by one Spider's friends are going to go down … maybe he'll cry. Meh; not my problem ... it will be fun though!**

* * *

The next morning the fourteen campers were awake and eating breakfast in the mess hall; while some campers were in a generally good mood (Barney and Lavender) other campers were glaring sharp rusty poison tipped daggers at each other.

Quana was glaring at Nakia; the hair obsessed brat treated Spider very badly even though he had done absolutely nothing to her in the first place. Nakia returned the glare as in her eyes she hadn't done anything wrong at all. Spider felt like he was caught in the middle of this and didn't really like that feeling.

"I just don't get *cough* it." Said Spider glumly as he took a bite of his rubbery fried eggs. "Can't Nakia just accept *cough* she lost? Shouldn't she be happy *cough* that she has a second chance?"

"Nakia is suffering from a severe case of H.O.I or as I like to call it; hair obsessed idiocy yaaar!" Said Barney while Lavender snuggled against him which he seemed quite happy about.

"At least your spirits are still *cough* high Barney." Said Spider as he pushed his plate away. "I just *sneeze* feel … chagrin."

"C'mon Spider; cheer up." Said Lavender nicely. "It could be worse than it is."

"How?" Asked Spider flatly as a pancake.

"You could've been on my team; if that was the case then you would have been bunking with Kasimar the whole competition." Explained Lavender. "Oscar says he's attempting to use meditation to keep himself calm."

"Maybe I could *cough* give that a go." Pondered Spider.

Nakia passed by the table on her way to the cabin so she could brush her hair; she glared at Spider on the way past. Spider silently gulped. Sensing this Quana put an arm around her boyfriend in comfort.

"Don't pay any attention to Nakia my little arachnid." Cooed Quana soothingly while Spider blushed at his pet name. "I'm amazed she has even got the intelligence to remember how to sit down."

"Thanks Quana." Smiled Spider. "What would I do without you?"

"Die?" Sneered Kasimar as he passed the table and left out the doors.

"…What a dick." Said Barney as he shook his fist at Kasimar.

"Sorry Barney but not even a fist shaking as magnificent as that is going to make Kasimar apologize." Said Lavender as she glared at the bully. "How can he sleep at night knowing what he has done?"

"For that I have no answer." Said Barney as he began to play around with his spoon which was a better option than eating the food in front of him.

Quana arose from her seat and walked towards the door.

"I'll see you guys in a little while." Said Quana. "I'm going to try and think of a 'The Villain Sucks' song about Nakia."

"See you later *cough* sweetheart." Said Spider with a love struck smile.

"See you later my little arachnid … and did I ever tell you that you've got real junk in your trunk?" Giggled Quana as she left.

Spider paused for a moment and tried to process what Quana had just said.

"_Did she just call me fat_?" Thought Spider as he looked down on himself.

"Boy Spider; isn't it great that you've got the second prettiest girl on the island as your girlfriend?" Asked Barney with a grin.

"Yeah … indeed." Said Spider half heartedly as he began to think.

"I'm guessing that I'm the prettiest right?" Said Lavender sweetly.

"Duh!" Laughed Barney as Lavender kissed him on the cheek.

* * *

**Confessional: I sense a sub plot forming!**

**Spider: Does Quana think I'm** *cough*** fat? I'm only a hundred and eighteen pounds … but I don't really** *sneeze*** understand how girls think … am I ***cough*** really fat?**

**Kasimar: I heard what Quana said to Spider. She meant he has a nice butt … but I don't think he realizes that. I think I might be able to mess with him a little. This oughta be fun!**

* * *

Spider sat against a tree at the edge of camp thinking to himself. Was he really fat? Maybe he was just over thinking things; it wouldn't be the first time he'd done that. He was about to dismiss the whole thought completely when Kasimar walked up.

"Hey Bug; how's it going?" Asked Kasimar.

"Buzz off *cough* Kasimar." Said Spider without looking up at his nemesis. "I'm in the middle of something *cough* important here."

"So … trouble in paradise?" Smirked Kasimar. "Yep; I knew this would happen but nobody ever listens to me."

"What do *cough* you mean?" Asked Spider while going against his better judgment.

"Well isn't it obvious? I heard Quana say you've got junk in your trunk. You may not know it Bug … but when a girl says that to their boyfriend they are calling him fat." Lied Kasimar. "Seriously; I may be a sexist, homophobic, homicidal bully … but I'm a _Canadian_ sexist, homophobic homicidal bully … in other words I might be able to help you."

"Why should I listen to *cough* you?" Asked Spider with a frown as he got up and began to walk away.

"Fine; be that way Bug; have Quana break your weak heart for all I care." Scoffed Kasimar.

Spider stopped and turned around.

"What?" Said Spider meekly.

"Oh; so your gonna listen? Good." Said Kasimar as he strolled over to Kasimar. "Ok Bug; girls like a strong, fit and sexy guy … you're none of those. You need to lose your flab and gain some muscle … like Oscar but without all the preaching. I'd say losing about … something like fifteen pounds should get Quana head over heels for you again."

"You're lying." Said Spider. "I don't have to *cough* trust you of all people."

"Fine … it'd be a shame if Quana broke up with you. It'd be a shame if you had to cry yourself to sleep each night … but it wouldn't be a shame if she came to me for a REAL relationship; a relationship a fat person couldn't give her." Sneered Kasimar.

Spider may have been quite intelligent but Kasimar was purposely playing on Spider's insecurities and judging by his fearful worried expression it was working. Normally Spider wouldn't have listened to Kasimar … but the way Kasimar was speaking was making Spider, to put it lightly … panic.

"Oh gosh! I gotta lose *cough* weight and _fast_." Said Spider as he dashed back to camp to think of a solution while Kasimar smirked.

"Now to just sit back and watch the fireworks! Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in amusement at the fear he was making Spider experience.

* * *

**Confessional: Fireworks? But it isn't the fourth of July yet.**

**Kasimar: What an idiot! Boy; who knew manipulating somebody was that easy! Maybe he'll give himself a heart attack … if so then its one less competitor to worry about. Yahaha!**

* * *

Spider had formulated a plan to lose 'fat' quickly. He saw Oscar working out in his cabin and calmly approached him.

"Hi Oscar." Greeted Spider while Oscar lifted a barbell up and down.

"Oh hello Spider; how's it going?"

"Oh it's going ok … more or less." Said Spider nervously. "Hey Oscar; I know we haven't really spoken much during the competition but I'd like to ask a favor of you."

"Sure; what is it?" Asked oscar.

"Could I borrow some of your dumbbells? I'd … kinda like to be muscular like you." Said Spider truthfully.

"Not a problem." Said Oscar as he put the barbell down and picked up two ten kilogram dumbbells and handed them to Spider. "Lift these up and down for a few days and you'll gradually start to notice a change in your physique … but this sort of thing takes time. I'm guessing you want to be muscular to impress Quana right?"

"Sorta." Said Spider nervously before putting the next part of his plan in motion. "Also … how would somebody go about losing weight quickly?"

"Why do you ask?" Asked Oscar in puzzlement as Spider definitely wasn't fat.

"Well Patch called me from the *cough* playa; he wants to lose *sneeze* weight … can't say I blame him *cough* really." Said Spider while immediately feeling very bad about lying even though it was for a good cause.

"I see; but why didn't he just call me?" Inquired Oscar.

"He didn't have your *cough* cell phone number." Explained Spider.

"Oh yeah; he doesn't." Nodded Oscar. "Well … I'd recommend him to eat healthy and exercise properly for a decent period of time … just tell him not to overdo it ok?"

"Ok; I'll tell him, thanks Oscar." Said Spider. "Also … do you have anything that could, you know, tell me how I'm doing at muscle build up?"

"I have something that could." Said Oscar as he opened his suitcase and took out a watch of some kind that he handed to Spider. "It's a W.L.A; a weight loss assistant. It'll show you how you're doing in terms of muscle building and calorie loss … one word of caution … don't push yourself too hard, that's never a good option."

"Got it; thanks *cough* Oscar." Said Spider as he left the cabin while Oscar went back to his workout.

"Your most welcome buddy." Replied Oscar.

* * *

**Confessional: I have a feeling this WON'T end well…**

**Spider. **(He is wringing his hands nervously). **Ok; I'm sorry I** cough*** had to lie like that; I didn't** *cough*** enjoy doing it … but if I don't do this ***cough*** I'm going to lose Quana … and she might** *cough*** go to Kasimar! **(Spider breaths deeply in stress and takes out his inhaler to help him breath).

**Oscar: It feels good to help people … but I don't know why Spider would want to be muscular so suddenly; I'm pretty certain Quana would love him regardless.**

* * *

In the mess hall some of the campers had left after their poorly cooked breakfast to relax until the challenge while others sat together and talked. Andy was sitting with Mable next to one of the tables. This was fine by Andy because he was quite fond of the blue haired girl … but he was very worried at the same time; if he let slip about Tabitha's true colors Mable would be hurt.

"Are you ok Andy?" Asked Mable in concern for her crush. "You look a little worried."

"It's nothing Mable; I was just wondering who Kasimar is going to target next." Said Andy while thinking. "_I can't tell you or you'll get hurt_."

"Yeah; you should have seen what he did to Gary and Raven … well; you probably saw it on the Playa but seeing it first hand is pretty horrible."

"_Pretty Horrible; just like Tabitha_." Thought Andy. "I agree; I got an injury too but in comparison to Gary and Raven I got off fairly lightly."

"Maybe it's because you got done in by Wallace instead of Kasimar; amazingly enough Wallace has some sort of odd form of sportsmanship … they say you are what you eat and he probably eats nuts." Said Mable as she and Andy laughed.

"Well; at least his sunglasses were cool." Said Andy. "Well; its all in the past anyway, he didn't put me out of commission for too long."

"Yep; it's good to have you back. It'll also be good to see Kasimar lose." Said Mable.

"Kasimar isn't the only problem." Said Andy before he could stop himself.

"Oh yeah; we've got Nakia bothering us as well." Agreed Mable.

"Yeah; but she's not as evil as Kasimar." Said Andy to steer the conversation away from possibly revealing Tabitha. "But let's not focus on the negatives; there's a lot of good things as well right?"

"You're right as usual; there are some good sights." Agreed Mable.

"There sure are." Smiled Andy.

Mable and Andy gazed into each others eyes for a few moments before they realized what they were doing and quickly looked away with a blush.

* * *

**Confessional: Just hurry up and tell each other how you feel would ya?**

**Mable: That was kinda embarrassing … and it made my chest feel like a furnace. It's funny how supportive I am of somebody else's love life yet with my own I'm kinda nervous … I think he likes me as well … so how come I don't say anything?**

**Andy: Why can't I just come out and tell her? I think she likes me as well … love is more confusing than a company hotline.**

* * *

While Andy and Mable bonded in the mess hall Spider had found a secluded spot in the woods to work out where nobody would see him and question him, it would also give him peace so he could have total focus.

"Ok; Oscar said to eat healthy and exercise decently … and I'm going to do just that." Said Spider. "I guess I should start by warming myself up.

And that's exactly what Spider did; he began to do stretches and jogging on the spot. Pretty soon he felt his heart beating faster.

"Ok; I feel nice *cough* and warmed up." Said Spider to himself as he picked up the two dumbbells. "Let's see if these work as good for me as they do for Oscar."

And so it began; up and down went the dumbbells; with each of them having a total weight of ten kilograms he was lifting up and down a total weight of twenty kilograms. Normally this wouldn't be so bad but Spider's arms were a bit on the skinny side and adding his medical history into the mix it looked like this was a bad idea … but as any of you will know love makes people do highly **stupid** things.

Thirty minutes went by and Spider's arms were feeling like purple grape jelly and the area midway between his shoulders and elbows felt painful and achy. Spider ignored the pain and continued working out.

After finishing with the dumbbells Spider started running on the spot; he started slow so that he could build up to a faster speed over time which would be better in the long run. Spider continued on the spot jogging for thirty minutes and by the end his legs were burning a little and he had started to sweat though that was a feeling he was used to due to the amount of times he had contracted bad colds in the past.

Spider then moved onto push ups; this was easier said than done because of his arms feeling tired and if they were able to speak they would have been begging for a rest. Spider continued anyway and stopped after twenty five minutes.

Spider went back to the dumbbells and started lifting them up and down for the next half an hour. As he put them down he realized how sweaty he was and took a few deep breaths with help from his inhaler.

"Man; is this what those *cough* people on the biggest loser go through *cough* everyday?" Asked Spider to nobody in particular while he panted almost like a dog in tiredness. "I'd better get back *cough* to camp; the next challenge *cough* will be starting soon."

Spider picked up the dumbbells and set off back to camp feeling a little lightheaded; he dismissed this though because he had experienced the feeling of light headedness and deliriousness many times in the past. With the dumbbells in one hand Spider took out the Weight Loss Assistant Oscar had given him. After looking it over for a moment he received some (in his opinion) good news.

"Sweet; I burned off a *cough* total of four thousand nine hundred and *cough* twenty six calories … let's see; according to this I've *cough* lost … over a pound!" Said Spider with an exhausted smile. "If I keep this up *cough* for a few days I'll be like *cough* one of those lifeguards from Baywatch *gag* in no time!"

* * *

**Confessional: I'm like your very own personal trainer … one that tells you to not push yourself far too hard like Spider is doing!**

**Spider: On one hand that was physical** *cough*** exhausting and my arms and legs feel ***cough*** like haribo … and the other hand I feel stronger ***cough* **already! Maybe by the end of the competition I'll have become** *cough*** strong enough to take on Kasimar in a one** *cough*** on one fight.**

**Quana: I sense a disturbance … I don't know why but I have a feeling I ought to be concerned for some reason. Maybe I'm just being paranoid.**

* * *

About two hours later Chris had called the fourteen campers to the dock of shame; he was dressed as a soldier and even had a rifle with him. Chef Hatchet stood to the side grumbling about not getting to host his favorite challenge.

"Spider, are you ok me heartie?" Asked Barney as he glanced at his friend. "You don't look to good yaaar."

"When have I *cough* ever?" Asked Spider while making sure to keep a distance from Kasimar and Nakia. "I feel better than *cough* usual."

"Me heartie; you're paler than usual and you seem to shudder a little when you breath." Noted Barney.

"Attention cadets!" Boomed Chris as he shot a bullet from his rifle into the air. A moment later a dead eagle fell to his feet … again. "Bummer; second time today."

Chris idly kicked the dead eagle into the water while Eleanor looked furious.

"How could you?" Growled Eleanor; she didn't look particularly intimidating but it was clear that she was angry. "Why the rifle? Why not blanks? That eagle might have had chicks!"

"Just like you." Smirked Kasimar.

Eleanor's face went blank as her facial expression became sickened and she went silent.

"Thank you Kasimar; I didn't want another lecture from Tree Hugger Number one and a half." Smirked Chris as he assumed a military stance. "Fall in cadets! Today's challenge is going to test your mobility, stamina, constitution, strength and abilities as a living doormat! Do I make myself clear?"

"You really do _not_ make for a good drill sergeant." Said Xaria as she rolled her eyes. "You should have given Chef the job."

"I told you! Even cranky girl listens!" Barked Chef at Chris with a frown.

"My show my rules!" Whined Chris as he stomped his feet like a toddler being sent to the corner. "Anyway; you miserable lot are going to be putting yourselves to the limit! You are going to be soldiers like last season!"

"Another reused challenge; unoriginal." Said Tabitha which earned a few laughs from most of the contestants and even Chef.

"Whose side are you on Chef?" Pouted Chris. "Anyway; we're going to be taking this challenge all through the night if we have to! There are fourteen of you in front of me … but only four of you are getting immunity today. Prepare to have your muscles screaming for mercy because this is basic straining!"

The campers exchanged glances … Chris was becoming _seriously_ pathetic in his attempts to be dominant over them. But a challenge involving the army sounding like a test to show which camper was the strongest. Some were thinking what should be written on their tombstones and others looked interested or even excited for that matter.

* * *

**Confessional: Do they have special occasion cards that say 'Thank you for coming to my funeral'?**

**Kasimar: I've got this in the bag; if all merge challenges are going to be this easy they might as well declare me winner right now.**

**Tabitha: I never particularly liked the army lifestyle … but it could be because I really don't like physical pain. Well; I doubt people will vote for me even if I don't win immunity, as long as somebody out of my alliance is booted then I can rest easy tonight.**

**Lavender: This might not be so bad; I'm reasonable strong, though not as much as Oscar, and I'm very athletic. I wonder if we have to write an essay on why we love Chris … I hope not.**

**Spider: **(He looks oddly excited). **This challenge couldn't have** *cough*** arrived at a better time; what a** *cough*** great opportunity to burn off some weight. I'd** *big sneeze*** never be able to become a soldier because of my ***cough*** medical conditions. Maybe I can burn off** *cough*** another pound by the end of ***cough*** today … I'll be a regular Stud Manly in no***cough*** time!**

**Nakia:** (She is grinning deviously while brushing her hair).** This challenge couldn't have arrived at a better time! There's **_**no way**_** Spider could possibly win immunity; once he's gone I will finally be content. Tabitha said I have to focus on the competition and not my hair … that's so haaaard!**

**Chris: Can't you just taste the ratings? They taste like sweaty anchovies! Yummy!**

* * *

Well; a lot of interesting developments have happened in this chapter don't you think? Nakia is now allied with Tabitha thus making the blond chess master more powerful. Not only that but now Spider has gained an unhealthy paranoia about his weight. All this and Chris dressed as a solider! But how will all of this end up? With a trip to the infirmary? I know already … but do you?

Also for those of you who love spotting little details … hidden somewhere in this chapter is a subtle hint about something big that will happen in the sequel … see if you can spot it; I dare ya!


	35. Day 16, Part 2, Saving Private Wawanakwa

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet which is a serious Must Read. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would like it if you do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains hair related discrimination, a sadistic host, some love, the Japanese language, army related torture, sleeping, a cameo and electrocution. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's interesting fact: **Everyone now and then I'm going to tell you, the fans, something interesting about the story you may not have known. here's this chapters fact...

...

...

...

...

Wallace's ethnicity is in fact Italian. I bet you didn't know that!

**Note: **I don't think I mentioned this last time but I have officially graduated high school … I survived! Yeah! Though IO don't think the bullies got the karma they deserved.

I have updated my profile with links to the eight T.D.L.2 OC's I have revealed on Deviantart so far. Remember; with every chapter I post a new character gets revealed. Son enough all twenty six will be viewable. Until then enjoy part 2 of day fourteen and maybe leave a review to tell me what you think.

Left right left right left right left right!

* * *

"Never gonna give you up; never gonna let you down! I'm never gonna desert you yaaar!" Sang Barney to keep himself occupied and to ignore the pain in his arms.

For the past forty three minutes the fourteen campers had been forced to hold canoes above their heads; thankfully they were smaller than those used last season due to each being carried by a single person though they were still heavy. It was a hot day and due to the combined heat and pressure on the arms … this was torture. Or at least it was for most…

Oscar wasn't having much trouble keeping the canoe above his head; if anything this challenge was kind of boring so far. Chris probably hadn't thought this through properly.

Kasimar was having little difficulty as well; despite his low tolerance for pain he was fairly strong so was keeping up his canoe with relative ease as well.

Spider's arms felt tired; not only because of the canoe but also because of his extreme work out from earlier. But Spider had sworn to himself that he would not give up; his determination was showing as he wasn't even letting his arms bend to a more comfortable angle.

Nakia scowled at Spider; oh how she hated that social misfit! But she was sure that it was only a matter of time before his arms gave out to the weight. Nakia herself was having a little difficulty but she was thinking about Tabitha's warning. If she didn't get immunity she would probably be voted off; especially if Kasimar ended up immune.

"Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down!" Sang Barney again.

"Ok make it stop!" Moaned Xaria. "No offense Barney, none at all but I seriously do not like that song."

"But it's a classic." Said Barney in hopes he could continue singing.

"Hey; do you know how many times I've found what looks like a good video on YouTube and it turns out I've been 'Rick Rolled'?" Asked Xaria flatly. "The only song I hate more than that is 'Banana phone'."

"Xaria's kinda right sweetie." Said Lavender from beside Barney. "The song is a little annoying."

"Ok; you've convinced me not to sing it cabin girl." Agreed Barney. "… Can you feeeel liiiiife, moving through your mind? Ooooooh, looks like it came back for mooooore!"

"Silence soldier!" Barked Chris as he walked up and leaned in at Barney. "Don't make me shoot you at dawn! Or is it high tide? Haha!"

"That isn't something to joke about Chris." Said Mable with a stern glare.

"Whatever." Shrugged Chris indifferently as he smugly grinned at the campers. "I bet you're sweating aren't you? I bet you wish you could wipe away the sweat huh?"

Andy seemed to have planned ahead as he balanced his canoe on his back and held it with one hand while he took out a small folded towel from his pocket with the other and wiped the sweat away.

"Hey!" Snapped Chris as he quickly walked over. "Where did you get the towel from?"

"My pocket; I never go anywhere without a towel you know." Said Andy proudly.

"Any particular reason why?" Asked Jimmy in confusion.

"Towels are THE most useful tool anybody could ever have _ever_; at least that's what the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy says." Explained Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: What does the Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy say about confessionals?**

**Andy: Always bring a towel; it may sound stupid but most good advice sounds stupid until you understand its true meaning.**

**Eleanor: This was a pretty hard challenge; I'm not exactly known for my physical strength. I wonder if Chris is going to reuse anymore challenges from last season.**

**Oscar: Holding up boats wasn't really that bad; looks like my extensive working out is paying off eh?**

**Kasimar: Tabitha told me that Nakia is on our side now; that means we have a voting power of four votes; if by manipulation or coincidence four others vote the same way as us we'll have the majority and whoever we want gone WILL be gone. But who to choose? Decisions, decisions. **(Kasimar smirks nastily).

**Ulysses: Now this is a challenge I can get behind; no weak noncy challenges; just something purely war based … wait a minute; this isn't Total Drama Alphabet. Where in blue blazes am I?**

**Uzuri: You ever get the feeling that somebody just made a cameo for no particular reason? … Naw! I'm probably just imagining things.**

* * *

"I'll be having that." Said Chris as he snatched Andy's towel away. "That would be giving you an unfair advantage."

"You mean like what you've been giving Kasimar?" Frowned Andy.

"I have done no such thing little boy." Taunted Chris as he walked away.

"I'm fourteen you トードやつ." Mumbled Andy.

"Wow; are you fluent in Japanese Andy?" Asked Mable from beside Andy.

"Yep; it's my second language." Nodded Andy. "I just called Chris a Toad Licker but it sounds better when nobody understands what you mean."

Mable just giggled at the funny insult but only for am moment as the hot sunshine was getting very uncomfortable.

"I feel more parched than an ex Boy Scout in the desert." Mumbled Mable.

* * *

**Confessional: Can I have some ice cold water?**

**Mable: This challenge makes me thankful I didn't sign up for the army cadet challenge at school last summer.**

* * *

"I can't keep this up for much longer." Said Jimmy in a pained voice as he held up his canoe.

"Oooo; looks like the little baby can't do it. Do you need you blanket?" Taunted Chris to get a reaction.

"Chris; this isn't really fair." Said Eleanor as she struggled to keep her canoe up. "Jimmy and I aren't as strong as the others; couldn't we have had smaller canoes in relation to our strength?"

"My game; my rules you Pig!" Snapped Chris.

"Leave her alone!" Said Jimmy bravely. "You're a bully; just a little person trying to make yourself bigger by hurting other people's feelings; I've seen your type Chris."

Chris got in Jimmy's face and snarled.

"Another word out of you cadet and you'll be put on level sixty nine probation!" Screamed Chris.

At that moment Jimmy's arms gave way and he accidently dropped the canoe on Chris foot … hard.

"…Boohoohoohoohoo!" Wailed Chris while crying like a baby and holding his sore foot.

"Ok; while Chris has his 'episode' I'll just say that Jimmy is out of the challenge." Said Chef as he watched Chris in amusement. "Ok small fry; you can just go and hang around camp or something."

"Any chance of some ointment for my arms?" Asked Jimmy hopefully. "They feel like lemon jelly."

"Whatever floats your boat." Shrugged Chef.

"I wouldn't say it's floating; but it sure hurt Chris; he won't be playing British football for a while. Get it?" Joked Jimmy.

Jimmy was met with a collective groan at the seriously bad pun.

* * *

**Confessional: The puns are getting worse.**

**Jimmy: In retrospect that was hardly a joke; for some reason I just like making people laugh. I hope I don't get voted off … but maybe I won't be if nobody views me as a threat … I just hope my friends don't lose.**

* * *

"I really do not like kids." Pouted Chris with crossed arms. "I'm glad I never was one."

"That doesn't make any sense." Said Tabitha looking confused. "We were all little kids once."

"I was never little!" Growled Chris.

"So you were fat than?" Asked Uzuri with a soft giggle despite the pain in her arms. "Kind of like El Gigante except without the parasite in your spine."

"Shut up you meanie face!" Bawled Chris.

"You are a disgrace as a soldier; you know that?" Asked Chef dully. "Why don't I just take over; I was in Naam!"

"Because I'm higher ranking than you so there!" Said Chris immaturely.

* * *

**Confessional: If you're higher ranking then why are you so short? Buuuurn!**

**Tabitha: Chris…**

**Xaria: Is completely…**

**Lavender: Pathetic…**

**Barney: And Starfish brainless…**

**Andy: As a **木製パン

**Chef: And that goes double for his hair!**

* * *

Half an hour rolled by and the sun was getting hotter; for the physically weaker campers this felt like torture but for the stronger ones it wasn't too bad though the sweating was a little uncomfortable. Jimmy was watching from the sidelines and would have been cheering his friends on if Chris hadn't threatened him with elimination if he did; after all, the lower the camper's morale the harder the challenge would be.

"I spy with my little eye something that begins with S." Said Kasimar.

"You've said that sixteen times already; it's the sky. Just shut up!" Groaned Lavender.

"But if I shut up then you're not going to get upset; I can't allow that to happen." Smirked Kasimar.

"Just like I can't allow you to win you filthy cowardly crap spackle savvy!" Said Barney while not looking like he was having a single problem with keeping his boat up.

"I can't go on." Groaned Eleanor as she dropped her canoe to the ground and shook her arms to get the blood running in them again.

"And Eleanor is out!" Boomed Chris like a drill sergeant. "Go stand with Jimmy; you should be ashamed of yourself for failing basic training!"

Eleanor gingerly rubbed her sore arms while she walked over to Jimmy.

"Ok you twelve; drop the canoes! You've passed Act One of the challenge!" Said Chris before coughing hard. "Ack! My throat hurts; I need a lozenge."

"Told you I should have done this." Said Chef as he rolled his eyes.

"Whatever; everyone just follow the glorious wonderful me so we can continue the challenge." Said Chris arrogantly as the twelve campers still in the challenge put down their canoes much to their relief.

"Man; that was more uncomfortable than the time I got squished under the rest of the cheerleader pyramid." Said Lavender as the feeling in her arms slowly returned.

* * *

**Confessional: If I had arms I'd know how you all feel.**

**Eleanor: This challenge isn't exactly fair; it's weighted in favor of the physically strong contestants. I have no problem with Oscar winning immunity but I really want to vote Kasimar off before he hurts any of my friends.**

**Barney: I've always liked boats and the water yaaar … but suddenly I'm feeling less fond of canoes than I once was me hearties. Yaaaaar.**

* * *

"Welcome to the second part of your challenge." Said Chris as he gestured to an obstacle course that had been set up near camp. "Pretty easy I know; no need to praise me for being nice."

Chris's arrogance was the least of the camper's worries; the obstacle course wasn't exactly what a normal person would consider 'pretty easy'. While some obstacles such tires a wall and a pit of mud weren't so bad there was equally as many obstacles that made the campers cringe such as loose cables buzzing with electricity, what looked like land mines and, of course, cannons loaded with golf balls.

"So; any questions?" Asked Chris with a sadistic smirk.

"I got one; were you smoking cannabis when you thought up this challenge?" Asked Nakia. "It looks crazy and I might get hurt!"

"What about your hair?" Asked Andy expecting to hear a hair related comment.

"My life is more important." Said Nakia with Tabitha's advice in mind. "Can we get on with this?"

"Excellent idea Brunette without brains." Agreed Chris with a rude smirk. "Lets get this obstacle course ready; everybody get to the starting line and I might tell you the rules … might."

"_This looks like a good way to lose weight_." Thought Spider to himself. "_Maybe if I push myself hard I'll build up more sweat so I'll lose more weight." _

"What's on your mind Spider?" Asked Quana as she walked beside Spider.

"Oh … nothing important *cough* dear." Said Spider as he wanted to keep his weight loss as a surprise.

"If you say so cutie." Smiled Quana. "This obstacle course looks hard … but mum sometimes tells me my Hispanic blood gives me extra energy."

"You're Hispanic?" Said Spider. "I thought *cough* you were just tanned."

"Well … legally I'm Caucasian but I'm kinda a bit of both." Explained Quana. "Though I am tanned; normally I have about the same skin tone as Isabella from Phineas and Ferb, maybe a little darker."

"Tan or not you'd still *cough* be pretty my Hispanic beauty." Flirted Spider nervously.

Quana just giggled in appreciation at the pet name as everyone got ready at the start line while Jimmy and Eleanor sat on some bleachers at the side.

* * *

**Confessional: I want a tan … but I'd have to settle for using fake tanner.**

**Quana: I told Xaria I'm Caucasian … which really is the truth; when you're of multiple heritages you generally say the one you are legally part of … though I'm Hispanic and proud of it.**

**Barney: So much mud … well; I hope my hat doesn't get too dirty; it's my prized possession yaaaar! **

* * *

"Ok then you little fish bait maggots!" Barked Chris. "Its time for your to run … the Maclean Gauntlet!"

"How original." Said Xaria with a roll of her eyes which made a few of the others chuckle.

"Shut up! It would be original even if it wasn't original because it's named after me!" Snapped Chris.

"That … doesn't even make a single lick of sense." Said Xaria with a raised eyebrow.

"Lets face it; since when has this show made any sense?" Asked Lavender. "Some of us are kinda crazy, big structures are built overnight, a purple gorilla is loose in the woods, giant robotic monsters were created in less than a day … yep; not much sense."

"Go Lavender." Smirked Xaria.

"Shut up you stupid bumble b-." Chris stopped when Oscar gave him a threatening look. "Err … never mind."

* * *

**Confessional: Chris wouldn't ever dare cut me off mid sentence!**

**Chris: Humph! I'll never be able to mess with Bumble Bee while Oscar is here … no fair! **(Chris starts having a temper tantrum).

* * *

"Ok; the rules are very simple. You are all going to run around this obstacle course until three of you have been eliminated. You are not allowed to stop and if you do then you are out." Explained Chris. "Basically pretend you have a bomb strapped to you that will explode if you stop running."

"I built a bomb once." Recalled Kasimar. "I used it to blow up the principles office; yep, good times."

"If you used your strength and apparent intelligence for good causes this world would benefit." Said Mable hopefully.

"Oh please; in the wrong hands intellect and strength could do a lot of very bad goodness." Scoffed Kasimar. "And besides; blowing shit up is funny."

"That it is Kasimar." Agreed Chris as he took out his rifle.

"No!" Snapped Eleanor from her seat. "You better not use that! I don't want anymore eagles getting hurt!"

"Fine spoilsport!" Snapped Chris with a big frown. "…On your marks … get set…

…

…

…

…

Go!"

The twelve campers bolted off the starting line and ran down the muddy obstacle course; as they approached the tires Kasimar tripped and landed face first in the mud. With an angry snarl he picked himself up and kept going.

* * *

**Confessional: It's a mud, mud, mud, mud, mud world!**

**Kasimar: **(He is glowering angrily).** I … hate … mud.**

**Nakia: Mud is gross! It's all icky and dirty and brown and icky! I've heard it does wonders for the skin but it's my hair I'm worried about! **

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor sat next to each other on the bleachers and watched their friends and adversaries run along the course. A gold ball was fired from the cannon and hit Tabitha in the butt; her resulting yelp made both the kids flinch.

"Man; this … isn't exactly the type of thing I'd willingly watch given the choice." Said Jimmy as Barney leapt over the wall right onto Oscar by accident which made both fall into the mud (though Barney's hat stayed clean).

"I agree Jimmy; it's like those animal documentary gone wrong shows minus the … well; you know." Shuddered Eleanor. "But look; Spider's in the lead."

Sure enough Spider was running at a speedy pace down the course; he jumped over a land mine and swung on a rope over a waist deep pit of mud. He was feeling a great pain in his chest but was determined to keep going and lose his non existent flab.

"I never knew Spider was in such good shape." Said Jimmy in surprise. "One moment he's coughing and ill and the next he's winning a challenge with the odds stacked against him."

"I wonder what's on his mind." Pondered Eleanor.

"Beats me." Shrugged Jimmy. "I'm no telepath … though it'd be seriously cool."

"Just don't read Chris's mind; it's a dark labyrinth that you'll never ever find your way out of." Chuckled Eleanor. "Heads up; looks like Andy stepped on one of those mines … I do hope he's alright."

"I wouldn't worry; if he can survive a dislocated arm I'm positive that he can survive an, ahem, small explosion." Said Jimmy with his usual smile.

"Do you ever have a negative thought Jimmy?" Asked Eleanor as she winced at Quana being blown upwards by a mine.

"Not really; I try to keep a sunny disposition no matter the situation." Smiled Jimmy. "The official website labels me as the Polly-Anna."

"I would have thought you'd be labeled the sweet kid." Said Eleanor as she rubbed her right arm. "My label is probably kind of obvious."

"The animal lover?" Guessed Jimmy.

"As I said; kind of obvious." Smiled Eleanor positively.

* * *

**Confessional: I think it's kind of obvious a toy ship is on the FAR horizon.**

**Eleanor: Jimmy sure has had a few memorable adventures with his friends; he told me about the time the local bully got his hands on a paintball gun, held Jimmy's friend Charles hostage and battled the gang in the junkyard. If only my home life was that interesting.**

**Jimmy: I don't know why but I have a sudden craving for yellow jellybeans. Hmm.**

* * *

"If only we had a tank." Lamented Mable as she ran along the course and past the electric wires. "Or maybe an all terrain vehicle of some kind."

* * *

**Confessional: Like a dragon?**

**Mable: An APC for example … well; it'd get us over the mud anyway.**

* * *

Uzuri ran along the course without that much trouble; once again Chris hadn't put much thought into the challenge as due to Uzuri's short height the golf balls sailed over her head due to the cannon's angling. Uzuri passed the wires but got zapped by one of them.

"Teeheeheeheehee!" Laughed Uzuri as the tingly feeling spread throughout her body and left her in a daze. "Just the energy boost I needed!"

Tabitha rolled her eyes at her pawn's antics as she continued making progress along the course; she was starting to feel tired as she wasn't used to running through mud and she was also wearing high heels. The rich girl tried to climb another wall on the course but after a couple of moments of trying she knew that she was unable to get up.

"And Tabitha is out." Said Chris. "For shame cadet!"

Tabitha shrugged indifferently as she walked over to the bleachers and sat down next to Eleanor. Tabitha shuddered at the dirt on her cloths and sighed.

"Well; my hopes of immunity go out the window then." Said Tabitha flatly.

"Well it could be worse Tabitha." Said Jimmy in an attempt to make Tabitha feel better.

"Really? How so?" Asked Tabitha to start conversation and maybe gain Jimmy's trust.

"Well you could be a weed at a weed killer factory." Said Jimmy.

"That was cornier than a corn kernel." Said Tabitha before laughing a little. "But I have heard much worse … so overall not bad. Maybe you could have a career as a comedian."

"Thanks Tabitha." Said Jimmy sounding flattered.

* * *

**Confessional: Bonus points for flattery.**

**Tabitha: The joke itself was pretty stupid … but dad taught me that flattery is a very good way of getting people on your side; just tell them what they want to hear and they'll lap it right up as though they were a cat drinking milk.**

* * *

"This isn't a very fair challenge." Said Tabitha. "It's like you said Eleanor; it's weighted in the stronger contestants favor."

"But what can we do about it?" Asked Eleanor.

"I'm not sure … maybe we can hope that Chris will get fired for his extreme bias on the competition." Suggested Tabitha hopefully.

"Yeah; if only he could walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers." Said Jimmy wishfully. "Maybe somebody could shave his hair off."

"I'd do it if it wouldn't result in my automatic elimination." Said Tabitha. "No; we're going to have to wait for karma to strike him down."

"And strike him down it will." Agreed Eleanor. "It'll be like lightning on a lightning rod."

* * *

**Confessional: Not a super original metaphor.**

**Eleanor: Tabitha seems really nice and thoughtful. It would have been nice if she was on our team instead of Nakia; she's a real team player.**

* * *

A few minutes later Andy had collapsed to his hands and knees; everyone was feeling tired now due to the extensive running without a rest but Andy could not go on.

"Andy is out; what a disgrace to the army!" Laughed Chris.

Andy dusted himself off and made his way to the bleachers. He sat away from the others as quite frankly he _seriously_ didn't like Tabitha and also had a lot on his mind.

"彼女は恥か？小さな子供を操作する...なぜ私はオウタ..." Said Andy quietly with a disapproving shake of his head.

"What does that mean Andy?" Asked Eleanor curiously.

"I was just grumbling about Kasimar." Lied Andy. "He keeps pushing people into the mud and he doesn't look as tired as most of us."

"Well if he doesn't win immunity he's as good as gone." Said Jimmy. "And I'll be quite thankful as well; I don't want to get beaten up by him."

As Tabitha, Jimmy and Eleanor continued to converse Andy glared at Tabitha for a brief moment. What he hadn't told the others was that he had been saying about Tabitha having no shame due to manipulating kids. But if Mable was to be safe Andy couldn't say anything … Andy felt conflicted.

* * *

**Confessional: It is very admirable to keep your beloved safe … if only you could take down your oppressors at the same time.**

**Andy: This is starting to get out of hand. Tabitha is already allied with Kasimar and Uzuri … and now she's starting to manipulate Jimmy and Eleanor for her own gain … is this really what money does to people?**

* * *

Spider felt quite a big pain in his chest due to all the running he was doing; normally he would have collapsed long ago but he was motivated and thus he was giving this challenge his all and wasn't going to stop. Lavender ran up beside him looking quite tired and exhausted yet she also looked both impressed and surprised at how good Spider was doing.

"Whoa Spider; you're running really fast." Said Lavender as they jumped over a pit of mud. "How are you doing this? Please forgive me for stereotyping but I would have thought someone who is a little ill wouldn't be so good at this sort of challenge."

"Don't worry about *cough* it Lavender. Normally *gasp* I would be useless at *cough* this type of challenge … but I have *gasp* motivation." Said Spider while clutching his side.

"Really? So … what's motivating you?" Asked Lavender.

"Oo! I know!" Said Barney as he ran up to Spiders other side. "Did Quana promise to get to second base with you if you win the challenge me heartie? You lucky dawg!"

"…No." Said Spider while turning red with embarrassment. "Lets just *cough* say I have my reasons *wheeze* for doing *cough* good."

* * *

**Confessional: Is second base like baseball?**

**Barney: Well it didn't hurt to ask right me hearties? **(Barney grins genkily).

**Lavender: Barney has a habit of being overly interested in over people's love lives … and somehow I don't mind that.**

* * *

"Why did Chris think these gold balls were a good idea?" Asked Oscar on his seventh lap of the obstacle course. "They could seriously hurt someone."

"That's probably why he chose to use them." Said Xaria as she ran haphazardly down the course behind Oscar. "We all know how much of a sadist Chris is."

"True … so; how well are you holding up?" Asked Oscar as he could see how exhausted Xaria was.

"Well; let's just say you're lucky that you are so strong." Said Xaria in a playful yet almost jealous voice. "This challenge is a piewalk to you … err … make that cakewalk."

"It's not that bad yes … but there's no guarantee that I'm going to win. Still; I think it's clear that Chris is tilting everything in Kasimar's favor … I am NOT going to let that scoundrel win. Who knows what he would do with a million dollars." Said Oscar as he slowed to a jog so Xaria could keep up with him.

"I'm guessing he'd try and forcefully buy our homes so we end up on the streets." Said Xaria glumly. "Or maybe he'd just burn the money to see the looks on our faces."

"Considering how insane and violent he is … he might do that which would have made the whole competition pointless." Said Oscar gravely. "But he's not a maniac … amazing as that may be to hear."

"And Uzuri is out!" Said Chris in satisfaction.

Uzuri looked a little blackened and her blond hair was standing on end; she had got caught by the electric cables for the past minute and despite actually enjoying the tingly feeling had not been moving and because of that was eliminated.

"…Ouch." Flinched Xaria. "Are you ok Uzuri?"

"Yep! My spine feels tingly and my arms feel like they are in a massage machine. When electricity has low to no AMPS it feels so nice." Giggled Uzuri as she walked over to the loser bleachers.

"In three words eccentric, fun and slightly creepy." Said Xaria with a chuckle.

"Ok you nine remaining cadets!" Yelled Chris. "You can stop running the obstacle course now because it is time for the next part of the challenge! Ten hut!"

"How about a break?" Asked Quana. "I feel like dehydrated food that you just add water to!"

"In the army you never get breaks!" Barked Chris before he started coughing. "Man; I need to take a break from this yelling. My throat feels like sand paper."

"I told you that I should have been in charge of this challenge." Said Chef smugly.

"Shut up!" Snarled Chris as he punched Chef in the gut only to hurt his hand. "Boohooohoohoohoo! Waaaaah!"

"Pathetic." Said Chef with a shake of his head.

* * *

**Confessional: Now Chris knows how Squidward feels.**

**Chris: I hate getting hurt! I'm sick and tired of being everybody's butt monkey!**

**Chef: I warned him but as usual he didn't listen. I actually have experience with this sort of challenge.**

**Xaria: I'm no sadist but seeing Chris get hurt made me smile … it could be because he completely deserves it.**

* * *

The fourteen campers; both those still in the challenge and those who had been eliminated, were led into the mess hall. A number of desks had been set up. Each one had a chair, a pen and a piece of A4 lined paper. Some campers had a suspicion of what they were going to have to do.

"Oh _please_ tell me we aren't going to do what I think we are going to do." Sighed Quana.

"Sorry Quana Spanner." Smirked Chris sadistically. "But for the next hour the nine of you still in this challenge are going to be writing about how much you love me."

Quana's eye twitched.

"Don't call me Quana Spanner." Said Quana in frustration.

"This challenge is so unoriginal!" Said Lavender with an exasperated shake of her head. "This is exactly the same as the boot camp challenge from last season!"

"No; if you'd have paid any attention so far you will find that you aren't writing essays about Chef, you are writing them about me." Said Chris mockingly. "And they aren't going to be three hundred words; that's just stupid."

"Really?" Said Oscar in relief.

"Duh! Three hundred words aren't enough to describe how great I am! That is why you have to write a total of one thousand words about how awesome I am! Haha" Cackled Chris.

"What exactly does *cough* this have to do with the *cough* army anyway?" Asked Spider who looked a little paler than usual.

"What does it matter? If Chef did it then so can I!" Chuckled Chris. "Everybody who still in the challenge get to a desk and get ready to write."

A number of the campers groaned as they took their seats. Most of the eliminated campers looked on with sympathy.

"This looks brutal." Said Jimmy sympathetically. "A thousand words on Chris's good qualities? I doubt I could even write ten words about why I like him since I really don't."

"I might have done pretty well at this." Said Tabitha as she crossed her legs. "I'm an A student at writing at school … I have serious motivation."

"I wonder if anyone will fall asleep." Said Uzuri as she rested her head in her hands. "Dream land is such a peaceful place that is frightening at the same time."

Just then Chris turned on a stereo that started to play a soothing lullaby. This time every single camper groaned at Chris's sadistic tendencies.

"I _hate_ that man." Grumbled Lavender as she began to write.

* * *

**Confessional: Yaaaaaawn. I really do feel like having forty winks right about now.**

**Oscar: When the challenge was just physical I had no worries … but now that it's writing … I may have a problem. Well; I might as well swallow my pride and begin sucking up.**

**Barney: This is where being on the honor roll will come in handy; I get straight A's in creative writing class … yaaaar, methinks that Chris will have high tide standards. Everyone is allowed a decent amount of self esteem but Chris takes it to a wee bit of a worrying level. He is certainly **_**NOT**_** me heartie to any degree.**

**Kasimar: If I won immunity by sucking up yesterday I can do it again today … also; Quana doesn't like being called Quana Spanner does she … that gives me some bullying power over her. Yahahaha! If a babe like her doesn't like me then I'll make her **_**despise**_** me. This game is so much fun!**

**Lavender: This was so boring … even more boring than shoe shopping. I don't know how a lot of girls get obsessed with shoes, I really don't.**

**Nakia: This was easy! I was never too good in writing class but sucking up is something I can do. I decided to write about Chris's hair as he loves it so much and I know all about hair.**

**Chef: This seems cruel even by my standards; playing a lullaby and asking them to write a thousand words about him … Chris is seriously letting power go to his head.**

* * *

"Remember everyone; you can't fall asleep!" Taunted Chris as he sat on a comfy armchair some interns bought in and began to drink a latté.

Spider had his head down and his nose close to the paper; he was determined not to lose. And as luck would have it he was pretty good at writing. Granted he would rather write about Quana than Chris … but he wasn't the one that set the challenges as nice as that would be.

Spider felt both tired and wide awake at the same time … it wasn't a particularly nice feeling. As he tried to concentrate he felt something hit the back of his head. Upon reaching back he realized to his disgust that it was a spitball of paper. Spider looked back and saw Kasimar smirking at him obnoxiously.

"_That bully puts the dick in Dick Whittington_." Thought Spider to himself.

* * *

**Confessional: Oliver Twist!**

**Spider: I wonder if Kasimar will ***cough* **ever feel any remorse for ***cough* **his actions.**

* * *

The minutes snailed by; the lullaby music kept laying and the eyes of some of the campers were growing heavy. This was truly terrible; seriously, would you like to write something that compliments Chris Maclean of all people?

"Can we have a bathroom break?" Asked Xaria hopefully.

"Nope; in war you can't go to the bathroom willy nilly! You have to remain vigilant and completely focused on the task!" Said Chris sadistically. "If you want you're free to wet yourself."

Xaria scowled at Chris as she continued writing; there was something wrong in the head with that man, something **very** wrong indeed.

* * *

**Confessional: Snore … snore … snore.**

**Xaria: I wonder if Chris was dropped on his head as a baby … or was he the son of two serial killers.**

**Chris: **(he stabs a box of cornflakes with a knife). **I don't know why I wanted to do that.**

* * *

Kasimar was having a pretty good time with this challenge; sucking up was fairly easy and as he was Chris's favorite contestant Kasimar felt sure he could get an free pass pretty easily. To his delight he saw that Oscar seemed to be having some difficulty; that would make winning immunity all the more easy … and it was easy to begin with. Granted that the challenge was fairly boring … but it was definitely worth a million big ones.

"Lets see; 'Chris is so awesome that he makes gore look wussy; in fact, he is so awesome that the whole universe pales in comparison to his awesomeness'; not bad … ok; I've written about two hundred words … man, this sucks ass." Grunted Kasimar. "I hate everything school related."

"But if you don't go to school you'll never be a success." Said Mable sleepily from beside Kasimar.

"I'll never end up on the streets loser." Scoffed Kasimar.

"True … you'll end up on the death row in jail." Said Mable as she yawned tiredly.

Kasimar was about to retort but saw how tired Mable looked and hatched an idea as though it was in an incubator. He began to make relaxing sounds that sounded like the ocean. Mable didn't realize what Kasimar was doing until it was too late. Her eyelids began to droop and she rested her head on the desk. After just a minute more of relaxing ocean sounds she fell asleep.

Kasimar cackled in triumph as he grabbed Mable's sheet and looked it over while making sure to copy anything good that he didn't already have.

"Looks like Mable is out!" Announced Chris upon noticing Mable was sleeping. "Looks like you still have to sleep even if your hair is as blue as blue cheese."

Mable remained asleep and began to softly snore.

* * *

**Confessional: What a refreshing sleep that must have been.**

**Mable: I fell for the oldest trick in the book … I feel so stupid … at least I feel refreshed and awake now.**

* * *

One by one the minutes rolled by and boy, were they slow as a turtle! While Mable had been lucky and escaped the torture by sleeping the other eight in the challenge hadn't been as lucky and while they still had a chance for immunity they felt bored stiff. Eventually the much awaited end of the essay writing arrived.

"Times up cadets!" Barked Chris as he quickly collected in the essays before prodding Mable awake.

"Huh; what happened?" Asked Mable groggily.

"You fell asleep; that's what!" Laughed Chris. "Go and sit with the losers because you are a big fat loser!"

Mable growled and kicked Chris in the shin.

"Don't call me fat!" Said Mable angrily as she walked over to the losers and sat down.

"Ok then; I'll just need a minute or two to judge these essays; one of you is not going to proceed to the next round." Said Chris as he began to read the essays and bask in the large amount of sucking up written on them.

* * *

**Confessional: Its times like this I'm glad that I'm not a contestant.**

**Oscar: That was brutal … I'm not dumb or anything but long essays are not my strong point. But hopefully I've done enough to get to the next round.**

**Spider: That wasn't so ***cough* **bad. I just thanked Chris for ***cough* **great things that have happened in ***cough* **History as well as complimenting his hair and ***sneeze* **hosting abilities.**

**Kasimar: Easy as pie; enough said.**

**Tabitha: I really hope Kasimar and Nakia can win immunity today … otherwise I'm probably going to lose an ally. **

**Quana: Thank goodness that's over.**

**Chris: Ok; between you and me I had no way to count if they had actually written a thousand words and I can't really be bothered to count manually … so I just decided to eliminate whoever wrote the essay that flattered me the least.**

* * *

About twenty minutes of sitting around the contestants were ready to hear what Chris had to say; not that they had a choice but still.

"Ok losers; after reading these essays I have to say … good job! I really liked them; especially the parts where you mentioned how awesome I am!"

"That's the whole part of it yaaar." Said Barney.

"I know! Haha!" Laughed Chris. "Though all of them were very good there was one that just wasn't as good as the others … and because of that the camper eliminated from the challenge is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Oscar."

"Aw nuts." Said Oscar in disappointment. "Well; I never was brilliant at essays anyway."

"Indeed you aren't." Sneered Chris. "Ok then; Oscar, you join the losers while the seven still in the contest, follow me, we still have to eliminate three more of you to determine who gets immunity … and I know just how to do it. Haha!"

Chris marched like a solider out of the mess hall and the increasingly tired final seven followed him out with the eliminated seven bringing up the rear. Who knew what torture Chris had in mind to eliminate even more of the campers?

* * *

**Confessional: A rack maybe?**

**Eleanor: When I saw what Chris was making the surviving seven do next … I felt relieved to be out.**

**Spider: This … won't be fun.**

* * *

In just a fairly short while the seven remaining campers were holding large rocks above their heads in the hot sunshine. It felt like torture and the worst part was that it seemed to be really amusing Chris and thus fulfilling his sadistic needs.

"How exactly is this any different from holding canoes up?" Asked Lavender as she breathed deeply whilst holding the rock above her head.

"Because you're holding a rock and not a canoe … duh!" Said Chris casually.

"But it's the same sort of thing though." Said Lavender. "I mean; we're back on the dock and doing the same thing that we were doing in the fist place more or less."

"Oh shut up!" Snarled Chris. "It's not the same thing because I say so and therefore whatever you say doesn't count so ha!"

Most of the campers made a collective eye roll at Chris's extreme immaturity.

* * *

**Confessional: Chris is as immature as a Teletubby and about as hateable as one too.**

**Lavender: When somebody says the words Chris Maclean I think of the words totally pathetic.**

**Chris: Shut uuuup meanie! **

* * *

So there were the remaining seven holding up rocks and looking exhausted; even Kasimar was starting to look tired.

"This is so _hard_." Whined Nakia. "I don't deserve this mistreatment! Why couldn't Spider have had my rock as well as his?"

"Leave my boyfriend alone you harpy." Said Quana coldly while giving Nakia _The Look_.

Nakia trembled in fright and quickly went silent.

* * *

**Confessional: Hair today, gone tomorrow.**

**Nakia: How **_**dare**_** that Hispanic horse talk down to **_**me**_**; I demand respect!**

* * *

Barney was having a bit of trouble carrying his rock; he was starting to feel the ill affects of standing out in the sun with a big weight. A few beads of sweat poured down his forehead as he breathed in and out.

"Are you ok Barney? You look really tired." Said Lavender as she groaned in discomfort from her rock's weight.

"I'm fine Lavender me love." Assured Barney smoothly. "I'm just getting tired from the mass of this rock; I'm not exactly one of those men who can pull trains."

"Maybe not; but your still as handsome as one of them." Purred Lavender with a wink.

"Oh stop; you'll make me blush." Chuckled Barney.

"Oh stop it; this flirting is making me nauseous." Gagged Kasimar.

"You're just jealous that you don't have a girlfriend." Said Lavender with a smirk.

"And that you'll die sad and alone." Finished Barney.

"You're lucky my hang isn't here or you'd be kibble!" Barked Kasimar threateningly.

"But the fact is that they are not; you still going to threaten us when you're all alone and we outnumber you?" Asked Lavender coyly.

"…Bitch." Scowled Kasimar as he went back to focusing on holding up his rock.

* * *

**Confessional: Like a female dog?**

**Barney: I love it when Lavender stands up to Kasimar; she's could be the very person to bring about his downfall. Yo ho! I love that girl! **(Barney grins widely).

* * *

Spider's arms felt very painful and sore but Spider was not only determined to win but also to lose some weight and make Quana want to stay with him. Kasimar's trick seemed to be working … but ironically it was only making Spider become a stronger competitor.

Spider had been raising the rock up and down for the past minute like a sort of make shift barbell; Quana had noticed this and couldn't help but wonder why Spider was doing that.

"Spider; why are you using the rock as a barbell?" Asked Quana curiously.

"Um … well … I want to *cough* be strong." Said Spider truthfully. "And maybe if I'm strong I *sneeze* can finally stand up to Kasimar."

"That sounds like a good idea." Said Quana with, in Spider's opinion, a cute smile. "But I think you should start smaller. And try not to push yourself too hard."

"Thanks for the advice." Smiled Spider.

"No problem my little arachnid … and I must say I'm really impressed you've lasted this long. Way to stick it to Nakia." Complimented Quana.

"Heh; thanks." Blushed Spider. "You're doing *cough* really good as well … ow my *cough* arms!"

"If you don't feel like you can go on there is no shame in stopping." Said Quana kindly.

"Thanks … but I know *cough* what I'm doing." Said Spider while wondering if Quana had noticed his weight loss yet.

* * *

**Confessional: He thinks there is too much weight on his plate.**

**Spider: I feel pretty bad not telling** *cough*** Quana about my weight loss plan … but I** *sneeze*** think she'll be happier if I keep it as a ***hard cough*** surprise. Heh; she won't think I'm fat for** *cough*** much longer!**

* * *

Half an hour rolled by and the campers were starting to actually feel real pain now; most were driven by determination to get immunity and outlast Kasimar while others had there own reasons. Surely this couldn't go on for much longer … right? In any case it looked like this wouldn't be going on for much longer as a few of the campers were sweating profusely and their arms were trembling.

"I feel like I'm trapped between two pistons." Said Xaria in pain.

"I feel like a banana tree." Groaned Barney.

"…I don't get it." Said Lavender as she held up her rock with all her remaining strength.

"It means … oh I don't even know anymore." said Barney in pain. "How are you holding up Spider me heartie?"

"I feel … in agony *cough* yet *gasp* determined." Said Spider while looking sweaty and quite pale.

"You lot are wusses!" Sneered Kasimar who looked the least affected by tiredness. "You can't even hold up a little rock; Chris should just hand me the cheque now!"

"As much as I'd like to do that Kasimar it would cut the season short." Said Chris apologetically. "Oh; it looks like somebody is going to drop their rock any second now! Haha!"

The seconds ticked by slowly; somebody was about to drop their rock and loose the chance for immunity. All the seven teens looked exhausted but after one more minute…

BAM!

That was the sound of Barney dropping his rock onto the dock. He gasped for air and shook his arms about to get the blood properly circulating through them again. As he rubbed his sore arms Chris laughed.

"Well there you have it! Barney has failed like the weirdo he is and no longer has a chance at winning. Haha! Weirdo!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"Chris … what is normal?" Asked Barney calmly. "I'll tell you what it isn't normal savvy … you!"

Chris blinked and frowned.

"Oh shut up Pinkbeard the Pirate!" Sneered Chris. "The point is you are out and Nakia, Kasimar, Lavender, Quana, Spider and Xaria are through to the last part of the challenge … speaking of which you can all put down your rocks now."

With great relief the six remaining campers in the challenge dropped their rocks and felt their arms breath sighs of relief. That had been absolutely brutal.

"Ok cadets; no time for rest! We still have to get rid of two more of you!" Smirked Chris. "Follow me to the torture tree; chop, chop!"

"Please can we have a break Maclean!" Pleaded Lavender. "I feel like I'm going to _die_!"

"All the more reason not to give you a break." Said Chris in his most sadistic tone he could muster.

Lavender scowled at Chris as she and the others followed him; Barney quickly walked beside her and put an arm around her comfortingly which Lavender appreciated.

"I hate that man, I hate him." Scowled Lavender at the awful host.

"Don't worry about it Lavender; you're the better person. Just keep standing up to him and fighting for what you believe in." Said Barney soothingly. "And besides me red haired mermaid; you've nearly won the challenge … and I'll be cheering you on all the way."

Lavender couldn't help but smile at her boyfriend.

"Thanks Barney." Smiled Lavender very gratefully.

* * *

**Confessional: Did you know that Tree Tops was the hardest level in the original Spyro the Dragon. I'm still missing ONE measly gem!**

**Quana: I've never seen Spider so determined before. One part of me is not only impressed with him but is also proud to be his girlfriend … but the other part of me is concerned that he might be pushing himself too hard. Well … he **_**did**_** say that he knew what he was doing.**

**Jimmy: Man; this challenge has been brutal. Maybe it wasn't so bad being the first one out. Still; the last part was basically just hanging from a tree and I'm good at that.**

**Xaria: This challenge has really put me to the test … maybe I can win this. I just hope Kasimar doesn't win immunity; he's got away with his bullying for **_**FAR**_** too long.**

* * *

The final six were really 'hanging' out with each other; they had to 'leaf' each other alone, they had more 'bark' than bite … ok, enough with the stupid puns. Basically the last six were hanging upside down by their legs on tree branches. It was quite unpleasant and now they were beginning to feel physically sick. One could only imagine how hard this challenge had been for them.

Nakia had taken out her favorite hair brush and was brushing her hair to keep her mind of the feeling in her head; amazingly it was working but that could be because there was pretty much nothing in her head in the first place.

Spider was hanging upside down as far away from Kasimar and Nakia as he could. He was hoping that they would fall and either one of them get voted off. Spider was inclined to vote for Nakia … but if she and Kasimar won immunity he wasn't sure who he would vote for.

Quana was hanging on the branch above Spider; she was starting to feel a little delirious but not enough to make her fall off the tree. Quana was hoping Spider would get immunity though she knew Spider wasn't going to be a target for elimination … but still; you could never be too careful in these types of shows.

Kasimar was feeling two emotions. The first was triumph for making it this far and having such easy competition. The other was disappointment that Nakia's skirt wasn't being affected by gravity and revealing her panties. Kasimar was attracted to girls for nothing more than their figure. Almost everyone hoped that he would lose.

Xaria wasn't feeling too good; blood was running to her head and thus her vision was becoming a little blurred. Xaria however was anything if not persistent and wasn't about to give up.

Lavender felt ok; she had recovered from the strain of the rock fairly quickly and now all she had to do was hang upside down. Her cheerleader training was coming in handy; she however was praying that her skirt wouldn't come down … though thankfully for her she wasn't wearing a thong.

"Come on! One of you fall off already!" whined Chris impatiently. "I want to see a concussion!"

"Don't you ever worry that you might get fired?" Asked Andy.

"Nope! The producer is on a rural holiday in Romania with no TV. I can do anything I want! Haha!" Boasted Chris arrogantly.

* * *

**Confessional: That explains a lot.**

**Andy: One of these days … one of these days…**

* * *

"Go Lavender! Go Lavender!" Cheered Barney to support his girlfriend. "Go Spider as well yaaar! Yo ho!"

"Why isn't anybody cheering me on?" Asked Kasimar in annoyance.

"Because we all hate you!" Said Barney cheerfully.

Kasimar just grumbled to himself as he remained hanging upside down.

* * *

**Confessional: Hang ten baby!**

**Kasimar: I'm looking forward to seeing the horrifying looks on their faces when I win the million. It'll be priceless!**

**Uzuri: That challenge looked like fun; the feeling of blood rushing up to your head is supposed to relieve stress.**

* * *

A few minutes later the six were still hanging around and were all exhausted, even Kasimar was. Xaria didn't feel too good at all.

"I think … I'm going … to faint." Slurred Xaria due to the blood that had gone to her head.

A moment later Xaria fell from the tree but thankfully Oscar managed to catch her.

"And Xaria is out!" Said Chris with a sadistic laugh. "Only one more person needs to lose for the challenge to end … but who is it going to be?"

As Oscar gently set Xaria on her feet the remaining five were more determined than ever to not fall off. Four sports for immunity and five competitors.

* * *

**Confessional: Saving Private Wawanakwa.**

**Chris: They stayed hanging for ten whole minutes!" I was getting really bored. Thankfully it got **_**interesting**_** … haha!**

* * *

The sun was starting to set and the competition was still going on. The campers who had lost were cheering on their friends and booing the ones they didn't want to win. Chris was growing more impatient by the second.

"Will one of you just fall already?" Demanded Chris. "I've got a massage in fifteen minutes with a total babe and I do not want to be late!"

The final five looked like they weren't going to fall anytime soon so it looked like Chris would miss his massage … maybe. He also wanted to make sure that his enemies didn't win immunity either. Kasimar chuckled to himself as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small pebble he had collected from the obstacle course from earlier.

Kasimar aimed carefully as he could not afford to miss and also because it was harder to aim when you're upside down. After a moment of aiming at his target he the pebble hard …

…

…

…

…

Right at Lavender.

With a yelp of surprise and pain due to the pebble hitting her head Lavender fell from the tree towards the ground. Luckily for her Barney caught her and prevented her from getting hurt.

"And the challenge is oooooooover!" Announced Chris loudly. "Kasimar, Spider, Nakia and Quana win immunity!"

"Hang on Chris McKracken!" Said Barney sternly. "Kasimar cheated! He threw a pebble right at Lavender's cute noggin! He should be disqualified!"

"Oh; did I forget to mention that throwing things at the contestants on the tree if perfectly acceptable?" Said Chris with a sadistic smirk. "If you wanted you could've thrown something at Kasimar … but you chose not to! Haha!"

"That's a bunch of #bleep#!" Growled barney as he marched towards Chris to deliver some instant karma but Lavender stopped him.

"Don't bother Barney … he's not worth it." Said Lavender.

"…You're right; I don't want to become a bully mermaid." Said Barney in agreement.

"So … I have a cute noggin do I?" Blushed Lavender.

"The cutest." Flirted Barney as he kissed Lavender on the forehead.

"Can we get the attention back to me please?" Whined Chris pathetically. "Ok; so Kasimar, Spider, Nakia and Quana are immune and safe from tonight's vote … but as usual those who are immune win a special prize."

"Well; what is it?" Grunted Kasimar. "Is it a gun?"

"Not quite Kasimar … today's special prize is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

An army helmet for each of you!"

"But that'll mess up my hair and … oh never mind." Said Nakia as she thought fo Tabitha's advice which had really worked for her.

"Ok then; as for the rest of you … one of you is going to be voted off tonight in what might be the most dramatic bonfire ceremony yet!" Said Chris eagerly. "Report to the Bonfire Pit in one hour you hear me … one hour!"

"Any particular reason you are being melodramatic?" Asked Mable.

"Because I felt like it; now if you losers will excuse me I have a massage to get to." Said Chris as he saluted with his left hand and left for his massage with a so called 'total babe'.

Quana and Spider got down from the tree and both looked very happy with the outcome of the challenge.

"We did it Spider." Cheered Quana. "We won the challenge; looks like we're safe for another day."

"That we are my Hispanic cough* beauty." Said Spider with his usual nervous smile. "Too bad the prize isn't really worth the effort."

"Maybe … but I think I know a better reward." Said Quana mischievously.

"What's that?" Asked Spider.

"This." Said Quana as she leaned in and kissed Spider tenderly.

"Way to go me heartie!" Whooped Barney.

"Yeah; go Spider!" Smiled Jimmy before looking conflicted. "But who am I going to vote for? Kasimar and Nakia are both immune."

"Do what your heart tells you is right." Advised Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: People died so you could vote you know … so vote dammit!**

**Kasimar: Finally the time has come … I'm voting for Oscar; the look of Xaria's face ought to be priceless!**

**Eleanor: I'm going to vote for Mable … nothing personal but it's just that I'm not particularly close to her.**

**Jimmy: You are a really sweet girl … but you're a little scary. I'm very sorry … but Uzuri; you've got my vote tonight. Though I would much rather vote for Kasimar than ypu ... buit sadly he's immune.**

**Andy: I'm voting for Tabitha; you all know why.**

**Oscar: I wish I could vote for Kasimar … but as he's immune I'm going to vote for Barney on the basis that he is a strong competitor and I can see him winning immunity very often in the future. Sorry Barney … and sorry Lavender as well.**

* * *

The fourteen campers sat on the logs and stumps around the bonfire. All of them felt nervous besides the four who were immune as it was anyone's guess who was going this time. All the nasty people were either immune or had a strong cover.

Spider and Quana were holding hands as were Barney and Lavender as well as Oscar and Xaria. Jimmy was rocking back and forward on his stump slowly while crossing his fingers. Mable was glancing at Andy with a smile though Andy didn't notice as he was looking up at the sky deep in thought.

Chris arrived with a tray of thirteen marshmallows and set them on the oil drum as he looked over the campers. He smirked at how tired they were as well as the dirt on some of them. Chris cleared his throat to get their attention and he began to speak.

"Well everyone; here we are again; at the Bonfire ceremony, the place that nobody once to be if they aren't immune. I think we learned a lot today … mainly that most of you just aren't cut out for the army. Seriously; don't quit your day jobs! Haha!"

"I don't have a job Chris." Said Jimmy.

"Who cares?" Grunted Chris as he picked up the first of the marshmallows. "When I call your name, come and get your marshmallow. That means that you are safe … for tonight. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame … and board the boat of losers. That means that you are out … and you can't come back … _ever_."

"We _know_ that Chris; you've said it at every ceremony so far." Said Quana.

"It's for the first time viewers!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; the first four marshmallow go to those who won immunity it today's challenge … congratulations you four … you aren't as mediocre as the other ten."

"Nakia"

"Spider"

"Quana"

"Kasimar"

"And then there were ten." Said Chris as he looked over the rest. "the next marshmallow goes to…"

"Andy"

"Xaria"

"Jimmy"

"Lavender"

"Eleanor"

"Mable"

"Tabitha"

"Uzuri"

The only ones left without a marshmallow were Barney and Oscar. Both looked a little surprised at this occurrence and briefly glanced at each other. Chris chuckled sadistically to himself as he picked up the final marshmallow.

"Well … you two racked up the most votes tonight … and it just so happens that both of you have girlfriends … I bet somebody will be crying in the next minute! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"Oh yaaar! My heart is beating like a jackhammer." Said Barney as he clutched his hat for support while Oscar looked calm and rested his hands on his knees.

"This is the final marshmallow; whoever does not get this is out and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers and can't ever come back ever!" Said Chris while milking the drama for all it was worth. "The final marshmallow of tonight goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Barney."

Barney let out a big sigh of relief as he got up and took the marshmallow before looking at Oscar.

"No hard feelings me heartie." Said Barney kindly.

"Well Oscar; looks liker this is the end of your stay on Wawanakwa." Said Chris with a smirk. "You failed to outlast your nemesis and now your girlfriend will be all alone on Wawanakwa."

"Oh shut up Chris." Said Oscar as he got to his feet and turned to the others. "Don't worry about it guys; I figured I would go sooner or later now that the merge is here. Just don't let Kasimar win ok?"

"Don't worry Oscar; we won't." Promised Lavender as she shook hands with the strong teen.

Xaria looked stunned at what had just happened and a single tear left her eye which Chris immediately noticed and took full advantage of.

"Aaaaaaaw! Is the big crybaby bumble bee sad?" Jeered Chris. "What a shame! Your boyfriend gone and all alone on an island with people who hate you for the negative bitch you are! Oh Boohoohoo!"

Rage flashed in Oscars eyes; he calmly strode towards Chris and picked him up my the front of his shirt color.

"Leave … Xaria … alone." Snarled Oscar as he hurled Chris against a nearby tree.

"Oh mama look at all the pwetty stars1 Guheehee!" Slurred Chris in great pain.

Oscar turned to Xaria and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Keep going for me; ok Xaria? Make sure you give Kasimar heck!" Said Oscar with a smile.

Xaria was silent for a moment before she glomped Oscar and hugged him which Oscar returned. After a few moments they parted.

"Well; it's been fun guys; may the best camper win." Waved Oscar as he walked to the dock of shame. "Oh, and Kasimar … you're a coward."

Kasimar snarled in rage at being called a coward as Oscar walked the dock of shame and boarded the boat of losers which sailed off into the night.

"…I'll miss you Oscar." Whispered Xaria as the thirteen remaining campers left back for their cabins.

* * *

**Confessional: how it happened.**

**Tabitha: I got Uzuri, Nakia and Kasimar to vote for Oscar. With my vote that made four. I don't know who else voted for him … but I'm grateful they did all the same. Half of us are gone, for good this time. Only twelve left to beat and I'll be the winner.**

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a bandage on his head.

"So … Oscar has been voted off. Truth be told I never cared much for him; just liker most of these losers. With him gone only thirteen campers remain. Who will be the next camper to walk the dock of shame? Will Spider's weight loss paranoia cause him damage? Will the next challenge score big points with the fans? And will Xaria become a crying wreck? Find out next time on Total Dramas letterz!"

* * *

Votes:

Andy: Tabitha

Barney: Uzuri

Eleanor: Mable

Jimmy: Uzuri

Kasimar: Oscar

Lavender: Eleanor

Mable: Barney

Nakia: Oscar

Oscar: Barney

Quana: Oscar

Spider: Mable

Tabitha: Oscar

Uzuri: Oscar

Xaria: Barney

Oscar: 5

Barney: 3

Mable: 2

Uzuri: 2

Tabitha: 1

Eleanor: 1

* * *

And Oscar's time on Wawanakwa has ended. Though he wasn't one of my absolute favorites I still liked him and I found him to be likable and good to write for. But he was due to leave in this episode. But you'll see him in the next aftermath so don't worry Oscar fans. With Oscar gone Kasimar is the sole remaining male of Team Grenade.

Next time: Get the flippers moving because its time for pinball!


	36. Day 17, Part 1, Pinball Flippers

**Disclaimer: **I do not own total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his super amazingly awesome story Total Drama Alphabet which you should totally read. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so I would be very grateful if you didn't give into the temptation to steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains hair related discrimination, manipulation, a little Yuri, a giant pinball table, weight paranoia and purple and pink pancakes. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's Interesting Fact:** Almost all of the campers switched elimination positions during planning … but Vinnie was always planned to be the last one to go before the merge and I never had second thoughts about it. Bet you didn't know that!

**Note: **Today I've had a history exam … I always considered myself fairly decent at history but BOY was it hard! Well; thankfully I survived. Only two more exams left, one for history and one for Maths. After that I never have to study math (shudder) ever again. Woohoo!

You know; it feels weird being finished with high school after going there for so long. Have any of you had that feeling when graduating? Well; it's a good one anyway.

Enjoy part one of day seventeen. This episode is going to be quite dramatic so hold onto your propeller beanies everyone!

Sam and Max hit the road!

* * *

It was early morning on Wawanakwa Island. The sun hadn't even started to rise yet and the crickets were still chirping. Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame and gave a big wave to the audience as he began to 'once per episode recap'.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was a challenge that would make any Army Enthusiast happy … seriously; I do mean happy! The fourteen remaining campers had to go through basic training with me as their sergeant. It was brutal for them but I wasn't going to give them an easy time; I had to whip these losers into shape and determine which four would receive immunity. And let me tell you … this challenge was a real doozy!"

"First they had to hold canoes above their heads; it was here that Jimmy and Eleanor were eliminated. I guess physical strength isn't really their strong point. After that I forced the campers to run around The Maclean Gauntlet; a deviously hard obstacle course designed to separate the weak from the strong! Tabitha, Uzuri and Andy were eliminating and Tabitha managed to get in good graces with Jimmy and Eleanor thus furthering her influence in the game."

"Next they all had to get busy and right essays about the magnificent and most excellently awesome me! Haha! Mable fell asleep thanks to some devious scheming from Kasimar. While I was very flattered with all the Essay's it was Oscar who impressed me the least which earned him elimination from the challenge."

"After that the remaining seven had to hold up rocks for as long as they could. Spider tried using his as a barbell because thanks to Kasimar's manipulation he has become paranoid about his weight! What a retard! Haha! Well; it increased his determination and got him into the final round. Barney didn't follow due to dropping his rock first."

"The last part of the challenge was hanging upside down from a tree. By now all the remaining campers were either exhausted or just plain unwell. Xaria fell first but sadly Oscar caught her and prevented an injury … bummer. Just when it seemed like the challenge might end in a stalemate Kasimar threw a pebble at Lavender and made her fall; once again there was no injury because Barney caught her. Barney complained but it was well within the rules to cheat! Haha! And thus Nakia, Kasimar, Quana and Spider won immunity.

"At the bonfire ceremony it came down to Oscar and Barney. Thanks to Tabitha's alliance which now contained Nakia … Oscar was voted of and sent packing … but that asshole punched me! What nerve! All I did was mess with Xaria a little. Grrrr!"

"We have reached the final thirteen and with nobody returning at any point now we are officially halfway there! And now that only the strongest half of the contestants remain the drama is going to really pick up! Who will be voted off and finish in thirteenth place? Will Spider's extreme working out cause him damage? Will any couples get to second base on camera? And who will Tabitha's next target be? Find out right now on Total Drama letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous),

* * *

BZZZZZZZZZ

That was the sound of Spider's cell phone alarm going off on vibration setting. He tiredly rubbed his eyes and silently got out of bed and took his morning tablets. His three room mates were still sleeping and Barney was mumbling in his sleep about pizza of all things.

Spider silently changed from his pajamas into his normal cloths and exited his cabin without making a sound after picking up the two dumbbells Oscar had given him the previous day.

"Ok; the moon is still *cough* up, everyone is asleep and there is no chance *cough* of Kasimar giving me trouble." Said Spider in satisfaction. "Perfect time for *cough* a work out; I'll be *cough* nice and slim in no time at *cough* all."

Spider began to jog around camp so he could do laps and lift the dumbbells at the same time. After the fifth lap Spider was gasping for air but was determined to lose weight so he didn't stop.

* * *

**Confessional: Optimal weight loss is about a pound a week … not a pound a day!**

**Spider: **(He looks very pale and more ill than usual). **I was running laps from** *gag*** four in the morning until seven** *gasp*** thirty; that's three and a half hours of exercise. I lost about** *hard cough*** five thousand calories … another pound down, about** *splutter*** thirteen to go!**

* * *

A few hours later the campers were begging to wake up. Xaria was one of the first up; she yawned and rubbed her eyes. Immediately she remembered that Oscar had been voted off the previous day and felt a twinge of sadness in her heart. Things were going to much different without her boyfriend around.

Xaria began to think about how they met; early on he didn't seem too fond of her and truth be told she hadn't been fond of him. But soon he began to show her respect and even saved Xaria from falling into the water in the boat challenge. After that she had a grown a little more fond of him and eventually she started to like him. He was also one of the only people who had ever stood up for her. She missed him already and he hadn't even been gone for a single day.

"It'll be tough without him." Mumbled Xaria quietly. "…But I'll have to get by."

Xaria got out of bed and changed into her normal cloths; as she did she chuckled at Lavender's snoring. Xaria didn't actually think Lavender was aware that she snored in the first place.

A yawn filled Xaria's ears and she turned to see Mable getting out of bed.

"Morning Xaria." Mumbled Mable as she put her hair back into the usual large ponytail. "Sleep well?"

"Not really … I mean; I slept decently … but with Oscar gone…" Xaria trailed off.

"I understand completely; if I had a boyfriend and he got voted off I'd be pretty sad as well." Said Mable honestly. "Maybe I could make some progress with Andy today."

"Go for it." Shrugged Xaria with a smile. "At least two of us still have their boyfriends, you and Lavender."

"So does Quana." Said Mable.

"I meant out of us in this cabin." Explained Xaria. "You know; I bet Kasimar is in his bunk laughing his head off that Oscar in gone. Why I oughta."

Xaria made a strangling hand motion and shook her head.

"Well anyway; no more people are returning and thirteen of us are gone, that means that it's the halfway point." Said Xaria sounding happy with herself. "I'm feeling pretty good about myself; I like this feeling."

"I'm sure Oscar is happy for you as well." Said Mable with a sweet smile. "And if the final challenge has the losers take sides of the final two then you know Oscar will be supporting you all the way."

"…Thanks." Said Xaria as she put on her socks and shoes.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm going to take the side of whoever used me to confess the most!**

**Xaria: Normally I don't miss the people who lose too much as I either didn't know them or they bought it upon themselves … I did miss Raven though … same with Oscar. I'll go as far as I can ya big lug. **(Xaria chuckles).

* * *

Mable and Xaria were fully dressed but Lavender was still asleep. She was snoring a little and while it isn't the type of snoring a fat fifty year old bachelor would do the fact remained that Lavender needed to get up. And after sharing a cabin with her for seventeen days up until now they knew that she was a very deep sleeper.

"So … are you going to get the bucket of cold water or am I?" Joked Xaria.

"I don't think we need to do that; perhaps she'll wake up on her own in a few minutes.

A quick glance at the sleeping red headed cheerleader proved this probably wouldn't happen.

"Any other ideas? If Lavender misses the challenge she might get voted off." Said Xaria as she sat down on her bed.

"Hmmm …" Pondered Mable before suddenly getting a grin. "I might have an idea…"

* * *

**Confessional: You're name is dea? I thought you were called Mable. LOL!**

**Mable: I hope Lavender sees the funny side of the wake up call. Nyeehahaha!**

* * *

"…Hey Lavender! Kasimar just stole all of your panties!" Yelled Mable.

"HE DID WHAT?" Yelled Lavender in horror as she sat bolt upright and looked around. She quickly realized that Kasimar hadn't gone anywhere near her undies and frowned at the grins on the faces of her friends.

"Oh hardy ha _haaar_." Said Lavender as she slowly got out of bed. "If you wanted me to wake up you could have just poked me or something."

"Well it could have been worse Lavender." Said Mable.

"…You're right; it could have been a bucket of water." Agreed Lavender as she very quickly got dressed.

"I actually suggested doing that." Said Xaria casually.

* * *

**Confessional: Splashing at the beach!**

**Lavender: Under Xaria's once grumpy and now friendly outer shell lays a gold mine of deviousness … but hey; she's my friend, what ya gonna do eh?**

* * *

"I've just noticed something." Said Lavender as she brushed an orangey red bang of hair out of her face. "Overall we've lost half of our team; Carlton, Wallace, Raven … and now Oscar."

"Why … why couldn't it have been Kasimar?" Asked Xaria rhetorically. "If only we'd voted him off instead of Carlton."

"I wish we had as well." Sighed Mable. "But now … it's just the three of us left … as well as the demon next door."

"Ok everyone; here's an idea, at the next ceremony that Kasimar doesn't win immunity we will all vote for him regardless of if Nakia starts making things difficult or if somebody gets injured. I want to have the pleasure of booting Kasimar down that dock face first with the sole of my shoe!" Strategically schemed Lavender.

"Sounds like a good idea; I'm in." Said Mable.

"That asshole is going _down_." Smirked Xaria darkly.

* * *

**Confessional: Down under lives the kangaroo!**

**Lavender: Kasimar is a menace and funnily enough he has brains … if he had the sense to fake nice he could play everyone like a fiddle.**

**Mable: **(She is playing a fiddle horribly and she flinches). **Why do I get the feeling that this joke has been done before?**

* * *

Kasimar was sitting alone in his cabin on his bed smoking a cigarette. The whole room was filled with the scent of the smoke of 'lung cancer sticks' and more graffiti was on the walls. Kasimar himself was in a good mood; he had finally gotten rid of Oscar though he did have a little help from Tabitha. Kasimar was looking forward to bullying Xaria which would be much easier without Oscar there to defend her.

"This is the life; a cabin to myself, a faggot preacher finally gone … and a good cigarette to celebrate." Chuckled Kasimar as he took another drag and casually tossed the cigarette into the bin. "This contest just gets better and better; just twelve more retards to outlast and I'll be very well off."

Kasimar relaxed and closed his eyes with his arms behind his head.

"It's almost a shame really … some of the people who were gone were really fun to antagonize … heh; I remember when I used to scare Carlton all night long. He must have been gay or something." Pondered Kasimar as he ran a hand through his spiky blue Mohawk. "But I've still got twelve people to mess around with; and Quana has the cutest yelps when you smack her ass … and Spider is going to tire himself out to the point of a heart attack soon. I'm totally dominating this game."

Kasimar leapt out of his bunk and stretched.

"Twelve more days and I'll be rich enough to make a few people homeless." Sneered Kasimar nastily as he exited his cabin for breakfast.

* * *

**Confessional: Or maybe make Nakia combless!**

**Kasimar: I like this Island; so much to see, so much to **_**destroy**_**! Yahahahahaha!**

**Chris: I could make a DVD of Kasimar's best moments; I bet it would be pretty popular and make me even richer than I already am. Awesome!**

* * *

Jimmy was the first one up of the three guys still in the guy's side of the Team Puzzle cabin. He adjusted his beanie as he got out of bed. The odd thing about Jimmy was that he almost never took his beanie off; it was a present from his parents for his first birthday. It was also a one size fits all so he would never outgrow it. As Jimmy rubbed his eyes he looked around the room Barney was stirring a little and Andy was still asleep and mumbled the word 'Mable'. Jimmy smiled as he supported his friends crush. He looked up at the bunk above his but raised an eyebrow when he saw that Spider wasn't there.

"I wonder where he could be." Pondered Jimmy. "Eh; he probably woke up earlier and went to get breakfast … I _really_ do hope Chef isn't serving his Tomato surprise today."

* * *

**Confessional: Yuck!**

**Jimmy: I have a kinda sensitive stomach … and the only tomato related food I like are when the tomato's are in a sauce like ketchup or spread into pizza sauce.**

* * *

Jimmy shuddered at the thought of the awful meal; as the sun began to shine into the cabin Barney yawned and leapt down from his top bunk.

"Gooooooood morning everybody!" Yelled Barney as he pumped his fists in the air and bounced on the spot for a few seconds. "Halfway point me hearties!"

"Yep! Thirteen gone and thirteen remain. I didn't think I'd get this far so … well … easily." Said Jimmy as he turned to Andy. "What about you Andy? Do you think you might even win?"

Andy yawned as he got up and out of bed. He rubbed his tired eyes as he looked at his bunk mates.

"I don't know if I'll win or not … but I'm glad I got a second chance at the million. The Playa was actually becoming a little boring." Shrugged Andy. "But I currently have bigger fish to fry than the million."

"Yeah; you and Mable right?" Winked Barney.

"More or less." Nodded Andy. "I don't know why but I feel nervous about approaching her though I kinda have a big hunch she feels the same way."

"If you want I could set you up with your mermaid me heartie; how about that yaaar?" Offered Barney while still bouncing a little.

"Thanks … but I think I can do this; I've just got to conquer my nervousness; it's hard not to be nervous around a cute girl to be honest." Said Andy both confidently and nervously.

"True … well; I trust your judgment Andy me boy." Said Barney with a rapid nod. "But I'm always here to help; after all, I did set up Spider and Quana did I not yaaar?"

"…Speaking of Spider … where is he anyway?" Asked Jimmy while pointing to Spider's empty bunk. "He was already gone when I woke up; usually he stays in here until we're all awake."

"He's probably just gone to get breakfast." Said Andy. "I wouldn't worry."

"Or maybe he went for an early morning snuggle with Quana? Yeehaw me hearties!" Laughed Barney with a grin.

"I don't think he did; well, I suppose we could ask when we see her." Pondered Andy. "But maybe we should get dressed before we go and see the girls."

"Good idea … but I dare you to say hello to Mable in just your undies me heartie!" Challenged Barney in his usual genki manner.

"…No." Said Andy flatly. "I really don't want to be exposed like that … and Kasimar would probably wedgie me as well."

"…I got it!" Said Barney as inspiration struck him like lightning.

"Got what? Gas?" Joked Jimmy which resulted in a face palm and a bemused sigh from Andy.

"Nope … I'm talking about getting myself, Lavender, Quana and Spider together and playing truth or dare! It'll be peg leggingly hilarious like the time my pet Koi ate my harmonica."

"…I won't ask." Said Jimmy. "Though I do hope the fish was ok."

"I'm more concerned about Lavender; who knows what dares Barney has in store for her? His mind goes faster than an endless NASCAR race." Chuckled Andy at his best friend's antics.

* * *

**Confessional: I dare you to eat mud! I'm so diabolical!**

**Barney: I have some good dares in mind and if Lavender wants to play then you guys watching this will be in for a real treat!**

**Andy: If Barney was a piece of furniture it would be a cuckoo clock … but he's still a good friend. … Today is the day I approach Mable. I'm no chicken, I'm an astronaut … well, an astronaut enthusiast anyway.**

* * *

Quana, Eleanor and Nakia were all awake and had already gotten dressed. Currently they were simply relaxing before breakfast as the food still wasn't exactly what you most people would call five star gourmets. Quana was flipping through an issue of a magazine entitled 'How to cope with pests', Eleanor was stroking her ferrets and offering them a piece of dried chicken and Nakia was unsurprisingly brushing her hair as per usual. Nakia had been oddly quiet the previous night and hadn't counted out loud when she had been brushing her hair though she had whined here and there but it was a fair margin less than usual.

"I don't know why but I have a bad feeling in my gut about today." Said Quana nervously as she flipped a page in her magazine. "Spider has had bad feelings before and they have come true … maybe this will as well."

"Maybe he'll get voted off." Smirked Nakia.

"Why? Because he has bad hair?" Replied Quana in a bored tone.

"Duh." Said Nakia flatly.

"Oh whatever 'Nokia'." Shot Quana.

Nakia's eye twitched and she put her comb down.

"Don't compare me to a phone you Hispanic _Horse_!" Snarled Nakia.

Quana's eyes were enflamed with rage as Eleanor quickly took a few steps back; it looked like a fight was inevitable.

"Ooo; hit a nerve did I?" Asked Nakia smugly. "Sorry but of 'coursey' you're a 'horsey'."

"You're dead!" Screamed Quana as she leapt at Nakia, dragging her to the floor and a cat fight quickly began.

Eleanor watched the fight is shock; Quana was pulling Nakia's hair and punching her in the gut while Nakia was scratching Quana with her sharp nails and trying to head butt her. Frost and Dandelion squeaked in alarm and darted to the part of their cage furthest away from the cat fight.

* * *

**Confessional: Cat fight! Reow! **

**Eleanor: Quana and Nakia really don't like each other … at all. I'm on Quana's side because not only is she my best friend along with Jimmy but Nakia is so, well, shallow and prejudiced just because of somebody's hair. It's just bizarre! But let me tell you … I really do not like being near a fight … fights are kinda scary. **(Eleanor shivers and pulls her hat down a little).

**Quana: **(She looks a little big ruffled up). **I don't think Nakia realized it … or maybe she did … but that was a slightly racist statement. Seriously; that girl is just pathetic and should just grow up! (**Quana sighs). **I really don't like getting angry and possibly hurting people … but Nakia is pushing my buttons and insulting my Hispanic heritage. And she's bullying Spider too … why did she have to return? Why?**

**Nakia: **(Her hair is a mess and she looks pissed off). **That stupid bimbo! How dare she do that to me! I'm walking art and she's a useless … fart. She should just grow up … just like my hair, its nice and long isn't it?**

* * *

"Stop fighting!" Called Eleanor over the angry shouts of her friend and foe.

Quana and Nakia looked up from their brawl; Quana looked like she had been about to pull out part of Nakia's hair.

"Fighting is getting us nowhere." Said Eleanor timidly. "And you're scaring Frost and Dandelion. Can we all just get along for a while? Settle it at the bonfire ceremony if need be … please?"

"You're right Eleanor." Said Quana as she got to her feet and dusted herself off. "Fighting is something Kasimar would do. And I don't think Nakia will last much longer anyway."

"I'm right here you one dimensional bimbo!" Spat Nakia angrily.

"Look who's talking." Replied Quana. "I'm going to go and get breakfast … or what passes for it anyway; maybe Spider is already up, I like spending time with him."

Quana left the cabin towards the mess hall while Nakia grumbled to herself.

"Great, juuuuust _great_." Muttered Nakia as she picked up her comb again. "Now I have to start brushing all over again; does anybody have any idea how long it takes me to achieve hair perfection?"

"Not really." Said Eleanor as she headed for the door to leave the self centered Libby to herself.

"Eighty five minutes; eighty five whole minutes!" Snapped Nakia. "Of course; perfection is something that a simple minded creature like yourself couldn't possibly understand."

"Maybe that's why you got voted off last time Nakia; you always talk down to people and judge them before you know them." Said Eleanor almost sympathetically. "If you just got to know Spider you'd see that he's a really nice guy; same with Quana, Barney and Jimmy."

Eleanor left for the mess hall while Nakia got up from her bed and walked to the doorway.

"Turtle turd!" Jeered Nakia rather pathetically.

* * *

**Confessional: Well you're a Tortoise tinkle.**

**Nakia: **(She is still brushing her hair). **Yep; I've got nothing to worry about … I won immunity last time and I can do it again now. And Tabitha can easily bail me out of getting voted off. The challenges are pretty easy when I'm not brushing my hair, which to be honest is much more important.**

**Eleanor: Nakia's hair takes eighty five minutes to get ready? Mine only takes a minute or two depending on if I get bed hair.**

**Quana: Fighting is wrong … but so is discrimination and racism no matter how mild. I'll apologize when Nakia apologizes.**

* * *

Uzuri was doodling in her sketchbook; she was drawing a picture of Kasimar being stretched on a medieval torture rack. His facial expression seemed to be howling in immense agony. She had also drawn herself and Tabitha watching him while eating popcorn.

"I think I'll call this one 'Rack Attack." Said Uzuri as she wrote her signature at the bottom the page. "I wonder what my watchers on Deviantart will think."

"Uzuri ... I hate Kasimar too but don't you think that's a teensy little bit on the extreme side?" Asked Tabitha with an unsure expression.

"Don't worry Tabitha; I'm not actually going to act upon what my drawings suggest, I'm just venting my dislike of him in a completely harmless way." Smiled Uzuri sunnily. "Haven't you ever had somebody that has hurt you that you want to get revenge on?"

"A few people I will not name." said Tabitha with a perfect poker face. "But I wouldn't go as far as to put them on a rack."

"To each women her own way of doing things I guess." Said Uzuri as she closed her sketchbook. "I wonder what today's challenge is; I know we suffer from them but I think they are so much fun! Teehee!"

"I have no way of knowing until it arrives." Shrugged Tabitha. "What's important is that you try your best and don't fail."

* * *

**Confessional: F is for fail!**

**Tabitha: Failure is not the Barrington way; that's what mum and dad taught me.**

* * *

"Don't sweat it Tabitha." Saluted Uzuri with a giggle. "It's not whether you win or lose; it's how you play the game … unless of course that game happens to be Russian roulette! Teehee!"

"_Oh I have __**so**__ much work to do_." Thought Tabitha in exasperation. "Uzuri; try to focus. It's the final thirteen and having allies becomes important at this point because otherwise people will pick you off in no time. You saw Oscar go yesterday and he was well liked."

"But didn't we vote for him?" Asked Uzuri. "I feel kinda bad about it."

"Me too." Lied Tabitha. "But he was the strongest physically and didn't have enough allies; the first is dangerous without the other in this type of show, I've watched survivor before, it always happens around the merge."

"Kinda like Micro Machines for the NES then." Said Uzuri as she looked up at a cobweb on the ceiling.

"How exactly? What does micro machines have to do with reality television?" Asked Tabitha in bewilderment.

"In the original micro machines you could choose your opponents; the wise player would start with strong opponents so by the end you only have the wimpy weak opponents left to race." Explained Uzuri. "In essence it's the same thing. Teehee!"

* * *

**Confessional: I don't quite understand the connection.**

**Tabitha: It's like running around an object in a circle and never touching it. **(Tabitha grumbles).

**Uzuri: The challenges are getting harder … but I've got an ace up my sleeve! **(Uzuri reaches up her right sleeve and takes out a queen of hearts card). **Oh; make that a queen! Teehee!**

* * *

Breakfast was served; today's special was a bunch of strange looking pancakes that happened to be blue … with pink specks.

"Breakfast is quickly becoming like a toddlers coloring book." Noted Jimmy as he poked his pancakes with his fork. "I think I might need some sugar with this."

"These pancakes are going to need a lot more than sugar to taste good." Said Eleanor as she popped a piece in her mouth and gagged. "If only Gary was still here, maybe he'd cook us something edible."

"Well … at least the food quality is a little better than at the beginning of the competition." Said Jimmy in an attempt to look at the bright side. "I've still got some of the candy my friends sent me; you can have some of that if you want."

"Thanks Jimmy; that sounds nice; I love chocolate." Said Eleanor gratefully. "I should have bought some with me."

* * *

**Confessional: Chocolate cake is chocolaty. Captain obvious strikes again!**

**Eleanor: Though I love chocolate my favorite ice cream flavor is somehow banana.**

* * *

"Have any of you cabin kids seen Spider?" Asked Barney. "Only that I haven't seen him yet and I want to ask him an important question."

"Sorry Barney; I still haven't seen him." Said Jimmy apologetically.

"Me neither … do you think Kasimar did something to him?" Asked Eleanor hesitantly.

This wasn't the case as at that moment Spider entered the mess hall and sat down with his friends. Instantly they noticed that he looked far paler than usual and he seemed to be a little lightheaded. Spider looked at the plate of blue and pink pancakes in front of him and pushed it away.

"Whoa Spider; you don't look so good." Noted Barney as he glanced at his friend. "You're as pale as an albino whale … and where were you this morning?"

"Oh … I woke up early *cough* and couldn't get back to sleep so *cough* I went for a walk." Explained Spider while once again feeling bad for lying; he didn't want anyone calling him fat as in his mind (and only his mind) he was fat.

"But why are you so pale me heartie?" Asked Barney.

"I just feel a *cough* little more ill than usual." Shrugged Spider. "After being *cough* perpetually sick for years *cough* you get used to it."

"You're a braver person than me then my little arachnid." Said Quana as she scooted next to Spider. "I hate getting sick; it makes me feel worse than Meg Griffin."

"Thanks my *cough* Hispanic beauty." Said Spider using Quana's pet name. "I'm just feeling a little *cough* sore today … but everything will be *sneeze* better soon."

"Oh, Spider; that reminds me, I have an offer for you." Said Barney suddenly gaining a sly smirk.

"Ok; what is *cough* it?" Asked Spider.

"Would you like to play a timber shivering game of truth or dare with me, Lavender and Quana?" Asked Barney while raising his eyebrows up and down.

"Ok; sounds like *cough* fun … and why are you raising your eyebrows *gag* up and down?" Asked Spider curiously.

"For the thrill!" Exclaimed Barney while wrapping an arm around Lavender who was sitting next to him and had been looking at her food skeptically. Lavender giggled and got to her feet.

"I've never played truth or dare myself … it sounds fun; we'll play it in Barney and Spider's cabin." Said Lavender. "And I want to get away from this crappy food; it doesn't even qualify as trash it's that bad!"

* * *

**Confessional: dare … smell Patch's socks!**

**Spider: I'm almost worried about what ***cough* **sorts of dares Barney will come ***cough* **up with.**

**Quana: Spider has been acting strangely lately … I wonder if something is bothering him. I could ask him for the truth in this game … but something tells me that might not be the best idea. He can tell me when he's ready; I trust him enough.**

* * *

Andy sat on the end of the Team Puzzle table eating the pancakes; they tasted like beetle poo but he didn't really notice the taste. The reason for that was he was glancing over at Mable; even when she was making a sour apple face from the gross blue and pink pancakes she still looked really pretty. Andy had vowed that by the end of the day he would tell her how he felt about her … but he was going to have to find the right moment.

Mable soon got up from her seat and left outside and Andy smiled to himself.

"Boy she's pretty." Said Andy to himself.

"You got that right; she's got a great rack." Said Kasimar as she sat down across from Andy with a foul smile on his face. "And with a girl their rack is their selling point."

Andy got up to leave but Kasimar grabbed his arm and spoke in a soft and almost mocking voice.

"Whoa there Andy; I just wanna talk, that's all." Said Kasimar as he pulled Andy back down onto the chair.

"I doubt somebody like _you_ could possibly have a conversation with no ulterior motives about causing pain." Said Andy with a scowl.

"You wound me." Said Kasimar sarcastically. "I just want to let you know that you shouldn't let yourself get entangled with a girl; it'll only hurt you in the long run."

"What would you know about girls? You're a sociopath." Said Andy flatly.

"Maybe so; but how do you know that Mable isn't just faking it?" Asked Kasimar.

"What? Mable wouldn't do that!" Said Andy in surprise and anger.

"How do you know? She's sixteen and you've known her for seventeen days … this might just be an act for the show so she can become rich." Warned Kasimar while grinning sadistically at the look on Andy's face. "Everyone loves money … and money is a lot more important than something trivial like love, especially considering the current state of the economy."

"You're wrong! You're lying and you know it." Said Andy but Kasimar could tell that Andy was starting to become stressed.

"Am I?" Asked Kasimar rhetorically while glancing at the ceiling. "I've seen bad girls before, really bad ones, the type who get kicks from oppressing and tormenting loners and outcasts … what makes you so sure that Mable isn't one of them? After all … I was on her team, I know her better."

Andy was silent and just stared at the table without blinking for a few seconds.

"See you later Andy; good luck today." Said Kasimar as he got to his feet and exited the mess hall.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't think a joke is appropriate at the moment.**

**Andy: **(He just stares into space looking just plain shocked). **Kasimar's lying! **(He began whispering). **I hope.**

**Kasimar:** (He is smirking as he smokes a cigarette)** It's all too easy; if Andy gets with Mable he'll try even harder at the challenges and he might end up becoming a threat … so I have to make sure that doesn't happen. It's all necessary in order to win … and the shocked and pained look on his face was funny! Yahahaha! Maybe he and Mable will end up fighting; I'd watch in on YouTube again and again and again.**

**Mable: Isn't Andy just the cutest boy ever? Though he seemed a little worried a few minutes ago … Kasimar had better not have been bullying him!**

* * *

Nakia sat outside the mess hall on a barrel brushing her hair. She had decided to skip breakfast due to it being disgusting and was taking some time to catch up on brushing her hair. Nakia was feeling relaxed; just her hair and nothing but her hair.

"Hi Nakia!" Chirped Uzuri as she walked up.

Well so much for Nakia's relaxed feeling it seems.

"Oh; what do _you_ want?" Asked Nakia with a grumble.

"I just came over to say hi." Smiled Uzuri. "Not many people like you and I thought you could use a friend."

"I have enough friends already; I can't fit you in, sorry." Said Nakia condescendingly while not sounding sorry at all.

"Who are your friends; not many people really hang out with you." Said Uzuri curiously yet still with a smile.

"My hairbrush and my stylish mousse." Replied Nakia. "They're all I need; I'm too good for anyone here anyway."

"Really? Because I would have thought that having no real friends would be kind of lonely, I know the feeling." Said Uzuri as she took a step forward. "So … have you ever watched SAW?"

"No; it's disgusting and the hair of the Jigsaw guy is so ugly it contagious." Said Nakia with a gag. "Just go away."

"Ok; but if you ever want a friend I'm here." Smiled Uzuri.

"Like I'll ever need somebody like you." Scoffed Nakia.

"What do you mean?" Asked Uzuri who had finally lost her smile.

"I mean that it's a wonder anybody can stand you; you're a pest!" Said Nakia. "Great; now I've lost count of how long I've been brushing. Thanks a bloody _lot_ stupid!"

Nakia stormed away while Uzuri blinked.

"What did I do wrong?" Asked Uzuri out loud.

* * *

**Confessional: I sense another hair related rant coming on…**

**Nakia: Urgh! I hate losing count of my hair brush time! Uzuri is just so annoying; her hair is so ugly and she's just plain weird. I could outcast her at school in an instant. I need this alliance … but why does Uzuri have to be in it? And why does her name have to so hard to pronounce? She's just annoying; and also **(she goes on like this for a while).

* * *

Spider, Barney, Quana and Lavender were sitting in a circle on the floor of the Team Puzzle boy's cabin. A bottle was in the middle of them and they were currently playing truth or dare. Barney span the bottle and it landed on himself.

"Alright! Dare me guys; I'll do anything yaaar!" Whooped Barney.

"Ok then … I dare *cough* you … to chew your own *cough* sock." Dared Spider.

"Easy." Said Barney as he reached under his bed and took out a red and black striped sock and put it in his mouth to chew it.

"If you ever want me to kiss you again you'd better brush your teeth first." Said Lavender as she watched her boyfriend chew a sock. "Goodness knows where that's been!"

Barney took the sock out of his mouth.

"It's been under the bed; you saw me take it out from under there didn't you?" Asked Barney.

Lavender face palmed.

"You know what I meant." Mumbled Lavender.

"Indeed I did." Nodded Barney.

Lavender blinked.

"Someone just spin the bottle."

Quana span the bottle and it landed on Spider.

"Ok Spider; how about a bit of truth?" Asked Quana with a sudden flirtatious look on her face.

"Um … ok; what do *cough* you want to know."

Quana grinned as widely as Barney usually did.

"Do you think I've got a nice butt?" Asked Quana with a wink and a giggle. "And you have to answer honestly in a yes or no fashion! Hahaha!"

Spider quickly turned beat red; he knew saying the wrong thing may make Quana mad at him; she already thought he was fat didn't she? Well; it's always better to be truthful thought Spider.

"… … … … Yes." said spider while covering his face. "But unlike Kasimar I wouldn't try and smack you back there."

"And that's another reason I like you Spider." Said Quana sweetly. "Looks like it's my turn to spin!"

Quana span the bottle fast and after a few moments it stopped on Lavender.

"Ok lavender; what will it be?" Asked Quana. "Truth … or _dare_?"

"Dare." Said Lavender.

Before Quana could think of a dare Barney spoke up.

"I've got a fantastic dare mermaids! Can I use it?" Pleaded Barney.

"Alright; but is it really fantastic?" Asked Quana.

"You better believe it." Grinned Barney while looking extremely excited. "Ok Lavender me love; I dare you…

…

…

…

…

…

…

To kiss Quana!"

"What?" Said Lavender in shock.

"What! Said Quana in equal shock.

"Oh my *cough* goodness." Mumbled Spider nervously.

"Quite a tough cookie don'cha think lassie?" Cackled Barney. "You can kiss Quana and score big points in the game … or you can chicken out and lose. Big decision me hearties."

"Well … I don't swing that way." Said Lavender nervously and red with embarrassment. "But … if it'll help me win and as long as you don't hold it against me…"

"Don't I get a say in this?" Asked Quana.

"You don't have to do it Quana yaaar." Said Barney as he began to use reverse psychology. "But; I don't think you can do it. You just don't seem the type to be brave really."

"Oh yeah? I'll show you!" Said Quana completely falling for Barney's sneaky trick. "So … ready Lavender?"

"Let's get this over with." Groaned Lavender in good humor.

The two girls leaned in and kissed for a second or two before parting.

"Happy now?" Asked Lavender.

"You bet! Yohohoho! I never knew reverse psychology was that simple!" Said Barney genkily.

"What … oh." Said Quana in realization.

"You sneaky rascal!" Said Lavender in embarrassment.

"What can I say; I'm unpredictable me hearties." Chuckled Barney. "So; what did you think of that eh spider?"

Spider had a blank look on his face since the kiss; he looked both thrilled, shocked and embarrassed to have seen what just happened.

"Whoa." Said Spider after a few moments of silence.

* * *

**Confessional: I smell fan service!**

**Quana: And here I was thinking I'd only ever kiss Spider … but it was platonic and no a dare so I don't think it really counts. But that's not why I'm confessing. After the others left I found two dumbbells in the room … but Oscar never entered Spider's cabin at any point in time as far as I'm aware. That's kind of odd … is it anything to do with Spider's strange behavior?**

**Spider: I've … never seen that ***cough* **happen before. I doubt Quana***sneeze*** will leave me ***cough* **for Lavender though.**

**Barney: Lavender says I owe her for that … it was worth it yaaar! **(Barney raises a fist dramatically).

**Lavender: **(She just has her head in her hand and chuckles).

* * *

As the thirteen campers milled around camp the intercom once again crackled into life. After a moment of highly obnoxious static Chris's also obnoxious voice sounded around the camp.

"Attention campers whose lives would be meaningless and suicidal without me; its time for your seventeenth challenge; this one is going to require fitness and stamina as well as speed; if Oscar was still here then he might have done good eh Xaria? Haha!" Laughed Chris's voice from the intercom.

* * *

**Confessional: That was mean.**

**Xaria: I **_**despise**_** that man!**

* * *

"Everyone report to the beach and I shall explain the rules for this hopefully highly amusing challenge. I expect some of you will lose the feeling in your legs! Haha!"

Chris laughed sadistically and stopped speaking. Before the campers could start walking though the sound of straining could be heard and a second later a loud juicy fart emitted across camp.

"Ah; much better." Said Chris. "Wait; is this still on … oh f-"

The intercom went off and most campers began laughing at Chris's stupidity.

* * *

**Confessional: Fart! LOLOLOLOLOL!**

**Chris: I'll bloody sue the intercom companies! I hate them! I hate them! Waaaaah!**

**Mable: Nyeehahaha! Chris really should read the intercom's instruction manual!**

**Barney: That never gets old! Yohohohohoho!**

**Uzuri: Teehee! If only the jigsaw killer had done that!**

**Xaria: Boy … Chris is stupid huh?**

**Jimmy: Heheehee! You'd think Chris would learn by now to check if the intercom was switched off wouldn't you?**

The final thirteen campers were gathered in front of Chris on the beach; behind Chris supported by steal beams just inc

* * *

hes above the sea was what appeared to be a sort of pinball table though the campers couldn't be sure if it was one or not because they didn't have a birds eye view.

"Well then; only thirteen of you losers are left … the eventual winner walks among us." Said Chris with a clap of his hands. "Today's challenge is something that I think none of you will be any good at. It is the sport of true gentlemen."

"You mean croquet?" Asked Jimmy. "I'd rather forget the time me and the guys attempted to play that."

"No you stupid kid!" Spat Chris. "I'm talking about…

…

…

…

…

Pinball; Pinball Peril in fact!"

"Alright!" cheered Xaria to Chris's surprise. "Now this is a challenge I _know_ I can do!"

"How can you be sure? You've never done it before!" Scoffed Chris rudely.

* * *

**Confessional: Pay attention next time!**

**Chef: Has Chris paid any attention to the campers this season? Xaria mentioned being good at pinball back in episode eight!**

* * *

"Anyway; the rules are very simple this time … sorta." Said Chris smugly. "The objective of the game is to score the most points by hitting bumpers and going up ramps, that sort of thing. But you are on a slight slope and at the bottom of the pinball table is a hole; don't fall in it or your run at the game ends."

"I'm guessing we'll be in spheres again right?" Said Lavender.

"Amazingly you are correct." Said Chris idly.

"I hated that challenge." Whined Nakia.

"Bad memories?" Asked Barney.

"Shut up weirdo!" Barked Nakia.

"Well; with that being said … the top six scorers will win immunity from tonight's Bonfire Ceremony. The lowest scoring seven will be vulnerable to votes and might get voted off. The person who scores the most points will get a special prize and who knows, this one might actually be at least half decent." Said Chris before cackling sadistically. "Try not to break your necks in there! Haha!"

The campers frowned at Chris's sadisticness as Chris took out a hat.

"To make this fair, and by the way I hate that word, I will be picking coins out of this hat. Each coin has the face of one of you on it, whoever I pick out is the person who does the challenge, no do over's." Explained Chris as he reached into the hat to take out the first coin. His hand came out with a coin that had Uzuri's face on it.

"Well Uzuri; you're up." Said Chris. "Try not to throw up; though I suppose it would be mildly amusing.

* * *

**Confessional: Pin the pin on the ball!**

**Uzuri: I haven't played pinball before; I've seen it though … but this challenge looks like so much fun! I'm gonna win immunity for you Vinnie! **(Uzuri blows a kiss).

**Xaria: For once I can't think of anything bad about the challenge; if anything I think I'll enjoy it.**

* * *

Uzuri was inside a smooth glass sphere at the starting point on the pinball table. She was excited and eager to get the challenge started.

"Ok Uzuri … three, two, one … go!" Said Chris as Uzuri was flung up into the main area of the pinball table.

Uzuri landed against a bumper; she quickly gained control of the ball and her balance as she began to run around knocking over some barrels that had been set up. Uzuri ran against more bumpers to score more points and passed over a rainbow colored patch on the ground that instantly added about a thousand points onto her total score.

"This is fun!" Cheered Uzuri as she went up and ramp and along a raised path shaped like a semi circle and landed down again whilst smashing through a gate which gave her more points.

Uzuri hit a button on the side of the table that made a large number of lights flash rapidly.

"Those colors are pretty." Smiled Uzuri as she hit another bumper; she hit it at a slanted angle which knocked her off her feet, through a row of three barrels and down between the inactive flippers at the base of the table.

Uzuri was let out of her ball and most of the others applauded her (the ones who didn't applaud were unsurprisingly Nakia and Kasimar). Uzuri smiled modestly as an intern handed Chris a piece of paper with Uzuri's score on it.

"Ok; not a bad start to the game despite a bad camper running the pinball peril table." Said Chris in a snide voice. "Uzuri performed decently with a total of…

…

…

…

…

Fifteen thousand, one hundred and four points."

Uzuri cheered as she rejoined the group of campers. At the screen at the top of the pinball table Uzuri's face appeared at the top of the leader board.

"And … that looks like a good place to take a commercial break." Said Chris as he signaled for an intern to get him a nice hot latté.

"But we never *cough* go anywhere." Said Spider. "We *sneeze* just stand around for about *cough* seven or so seconds and then *cough* you say 'we're back."

"Shut up germ boy!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; see you all after the break! But first I ask you these questions … who will win the challenge? Will anything unexpected happen? And who will be the next camper to walk the dock of shame? Find out when we return to total Drama letterz!"

"Here's your latté Mr. MacLean." Said an intern.

"About time!" Scoffed Chris as he took a sip.

* * *

**Isn't Chris a rude and self centered son of a … well, you know. Anyway; Spider is starting to harm himself with his weight paranoia which was caused by Kasimar. Not only that but now Andy is feeling worried thanks to Kasimar; he knows Kasimar is trying to upset him … but he can't help but think. But don't worry AndyxMable shippers because true love ALWAYS finds a way. And next chapter things **_**really**_** get serious…**

**If you liked the chapter and this story in general why not leave a review? Thanks in advance everyone! **


	37. Day 17, Part 2, The Moral Event Horizon

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his incredible story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would like it if you did not steal them ok? Thank you.

**The warning: **This chapter contain a sociopath bully, one use of the f word, a little blood, a lot of love, sad moments and a giant pinball table. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable **GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's interesting Fact: **Jimmy, despite being the youngest character, was in fact the first to be created. He was one of the main five characters in a script series I wrote a few years ago called 'the preteen scamps'. The other main characters are the friends he mentions from time to time. Bet you didn't know that … unless you've seen me say that on Deviantart.

**Note: **Howdy everyone! I've just finish my LAST math test in high school … and as I have no intention to study it in 6th form and college I might never have to sit another math test again! Woohoo! Yeah! I hope those of you who cry easily have your tissues ready because this chapter is very emotional and I felt sad writing it. You might all despise Kasimar more once you've finished reading this chapter. But this story isn't a tragedy, angst or horror fanfic … it WILL have a happy ending, I promise.

Moral Event Horizon on the horizon

* * *

"And we're back." Said Chris with a wave to the camera. "Sorry to keep you waiting … not!"

"As I said; a *cough* seven second pause." Said Spider while slightly swaying on the spot.

"Oh shut up germ sponge!" Snapped Chris. "What you think isn't important; you're just cannon fodder so the best people can go far!"

"Like me." Smirked Kasimar.

"Actually I meant me." Bragged Chris before shrugging. "But whatever floats your boat I guess."

"The boat Kasimar will be riding on by the end of the day." Said Lavender with crossed arms.

"If he doesn't win immunity that is." Smirked Chris. "And speaking of immunity I think its time to see who is the second person to have their turn on the pinball table."

Chris reached into the hat containing coins with the campers faces on them and took out a coin with a picture of Jimmy's face on it.

"Well; looks like it's the shrimps turn." Said Chris as he tossed the coin into the beach's sand. "Seriously; he's so damn short! Is he a midget or something?"

"I'm ten years old Chris; I haven't had my growth spurt yet." Said Jimmy flatly as he went to get into a ball to start his turn on the pinball table; hopefully he would do better in this challenge than he had in the army challenge the previous day.

"Shrimp!" Yelled Chris after Jimmy before somebody through a rock at his head. "Ow! Which one of you meanies did that? Huh?"

Nobody said anything which made Chris frown angrily.

* * *

**Confessional: Total Drama Rock! Does he know Mr. Coconut? **

**Chris: I'm really getting tired of these idiotic teens … they're so bland and uninteresting. Sure; Kasimar is fine … but even he pales in comparison to the super extremely amazingly awesome me! After all; I'm why people watch this show; unlike these idiots I've appeared in every episode!**

**Chef: Except the challenge last season when I got the pleasure of eliminating that punk! Chris has a bad memory indeed.**

**Eleanor: You got me; I threw the rock, I don't want Chris bullying Jimmy. Is it just me or is Chris acting his shoe size instead of his age. And by that I mean he has size two shoes.**

**Xaria: Good one Eleanor.**

**Kasimar: This ought to be funny; Jimmy is about as strong as a girl and about as much of a danger to me as a mud pie.**

* * *

Jimmy was quickly put inside the ball and shot into the arena. As he was the lightest camper the bumpers were having a slight bit more of an effect on him than they did on Uzuri.

PING PONG PING!

Those were the sounds of the bumpers ricocheting Jimmy around the pinball table and racking up points on his total score. Jimmy was quickly knocked off his feet and bashed around the pinball table. Jimmy then hit a bumper near the bottom of the table and was whacked back up to the top of the table for even more discomfort and vomit inducing breakneck speed.

* * *

**Confessional: Dizzy snizzy!**

**Jimmy: **(His eyes are swirling around in circles). **Look at all the stars … ouch.**

* * *

Jimmy was going around so fast that his hat had come off and now his very long messy blond hair was flowing around as he and the glass ball he was in bounced around the place and hit another bumper. As Jimmy went up the railings to the raised platform Uzuri had got to be looked down at the contestants below.

"You're a maniac Chris Maclean!" Yelled Jimmy as his ball rolled full speed towards the bottom of the pinball table.

CLANG!

Unfortunately Jimmy whacked into the flippers on the way down and once again fell over inside his ball as it rolled out of the pinball table and into the exit area below.

* * *

**Confessional: That HAD to hurt.**

**Kasimar: Yahahaha! Hilarious! If only the little twerp had broken his neck and the dead body got splattered. It'd be one less camper to worry about.**

* * *

Jimmy walked dizzily up to the other campers and was met with applause. As he put his hat back on and cleared his head Chris was handed Jimmy's score by an intern.

"Ok; I have to say that I thought jimmy was going to _die_ up there! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he looked at the paper. "I guess being small isn't really a benefit … but Jimmy; you did ok with a total score of Fifteen thousand and twenty one points; that's a good score but not enough to beat Uzuri. For now Jimmy takes second place and loses any chance at the special prize … so it sucks to be Jimmy! Haha!"

"What's so bad with second?" Asked Quana.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "I don't have to take flip from a friggin _girl_!"

"I recommend you don't continue that rant Chris." Glowered Xaria while holding a fist up threateningly.

"Sorry!" Whimpered Chris wimpily as Carlton.

"That's better." Said Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: Chris is a word that rhymes with gas hole.**

**Xaria: I don't like misogynists very much; Chris is no exception to that.**

* * *

"Ok then; the next person who is going on the pinball table is going to be…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Barney." Said Chris as he took a coin with Barney's face on it out of the hat. "Let's see how good the pirate weirdo does at pinball!"

"He's not a pirate weirdo!" Growled Lavender. "He's _MY_ pirate weirdo thank you very much!"

"Thanks Lavender." Said Barney with a tip of his hat. "Wish me luck me hearties!"

Barney dashed off to get into the ball as Nakia scoffed to herself.

"Anybody who can be that positive all the time and be, like, so incredibly ugly must be retarded or something." Said Nakia as he looked at Barney with disdain.

"I don't insult your boyfriend." Said Lavender. "Oh wait; you don't have one and I doubt you ever will."

"Oh please, I could get with any of these losers in a heartbeat; I just don't like the selection I have." Shrugged Nakia.

"Because you're a shallow brat." Nodded Lavender.

"No! Because they're ugly!" Snapped Nakia.

"I repeat; because you're a shallow brat.

Nakia just scowled as she started to brush her hair to sooth her temper.

* * *

**Confessional: Hair brushes act like Scooby snacks!**

**Nakia: Everyone here is not only mean but they are ugly … unlike yours truly; for the first time there will be a pretty winner as I plan on bringing home the prize. Besides; the fan base loves me I bet. And I don't blame them; I'm gorgeous! **

**Lavender: Nakia. Is. So. Bloody. Annoying!**

**Xaria: I think I was better off spending more than a week on Kasimar's team than just three days with that brat.**

**Chef: Hair gets you nowhere in life; I should know, I was in NAAM!**

* * *

Barney was shot into the pinball arena and quickly smashed through a row of barrels and bricks. He bounced between the bumpers at quite a speed and passed over a flashy spot on the ground. Barney ran into a bumper and shot to the top of the pinball table and hit a golden button which shot fireworks out of the scoreboard. As Barney tore up around the pinball table the others were looking on in amazement at how good he was doing.

"Its been thirty seconds and I think he's done enough to beat Jimmy and Uzuri already." Noted Mable.

It looked like Mable was right as Barney was managing to stay on his feet and was doing as good at Pinball as Killerhurtz in Robot Wars series two at the skittles trial. In other words he was doing very good indeed.

"This is just like bumper cars yaaaar" Cheered Barney as he bounced between the bumpers again.

The pirate and secret genius teen ran through a gate and a few electronic beeping sounds emitted from around the board as he hit a bumper on the wall and went up the railings and down back onto the table. Barney held onto his hat with both hands while his blond dreadlocks flew about his head.

After few moments Barney hit the bumpers one last time before being bounced down into the exit zone to the large applause of almost everybody for his great pinball skills.

"Woohoo! Beat that Kasimar! I dare you!" Cheered Barney as he got out of his ball and surprisingly walked in a straight line out of the exit zone and to the others.

"You did great Barney!" Congratulated Lavender.

"If we can all get scores *cough* like that Kasimar doesn't stand *cough* stand a single chance!" Clapped Spider.

"You could even get first place." Said Quana as she high fived Barney.

"Can we get the attention and compliments back to where they should be … me!" Whined Chris with a stomp of his foot. "Well; I think its fairly obvious that Barney has scored the highest out of the competitors so far … but do you know his score?"

"Well of course we don't; you haven't told us." Said Xaria with an eye roll.

"Shut up bumble bee!"

Xaria scowled but shot back anther insult.

"Shut up! You'll never be the man your mother is!" Said Xaria with a confident smirk.

* * *

**Confessional: But a mother isn't a guy in the first place … I don't get it.**

**Chris: **(He is wailing and crying his eyes out like a baby).

**Xaria: Chris makes it almost too easy to annoy him … and you all know he deserves it.**

* * *

"Shut up bumble bee! I can make your life miserable now that Oscar is gone!" snarled Chris.

"And what happens when he next sees you?" Asked Xaria.

Chris realized he had lost the argument and pouted.

"You're not nice." Muttered Chris as he looked at a piece of paper another intern had handed him. "Oh; and Barney's score is indeed the highest so far. He has scored a total of…

…

…

…

…

…

Twenty four thousand, eight hundred and fifty one points!"

Barney cheered and pumped his fists in the air; he felt confident that he had done enough to at least get immunity.

"Yaaaar! I think I be having a good chance at winning this one!" Whooped Barney.

"Good job Barney." Complimented Tabitha. "I think you really could win this challenge."

"Thanks Tabitha." Smiled Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: I wonder if the prize is a Macdonald's coupon.**

**Tabitha: Getting on Barney's good side is a wise move because most of the others like him and he's also a strong competitor, a rare combination. Still … the whole pirate thing makes him seem really eccentric … though not as much a freak as Uzuri.**

**Barney: I have a good feeling in my gut and its definitely not this morning's blue and pink pancakes.**

**Andy: If Tabitha gets Barney on her side there's no telling what bad things she could get away with. I've got to do something … maybe … maybe if I told Uzuri when Tabitha isn't around I could start her downfall.**

**Eleanor: I kinda doubt I can beat Barney's score … but Uzuri and Jimmy have the right idea; its about having fun … though immunity would be nice.**

* * *

"Ok; the fourth person to play Pinball Peril is Lavender." Said Chris as he took a coin with Lavenders face on it out of the hat. "Can she beat her boyfriend? Or will she dwelve into the deep sea of mediocrocy? Let's find out!"

"You're the one who's mediocre." Said Lavender as she left to get into a ball and score some points.

"She's got you there Chris." Said Mable with a smirk.

"Stop bullying me!" Screamed Chris in anger.

* * *

**Confessional: Bully wooly.**

**Mable: And yet he doesn't think that he's been bullying us?**

**Jimmy: Chris is mean.**

* * *

Lavender got into her ball and was pinged up into the score zone; instantly she maneuvered her ball into a gold bumper at the side of the pinball table; she rebounded off it and bounced between a fair number of the bright colored bumpers and scored a very reasonable number of points whilst doing so. Lavender kept her balance just as Barney had done and racked up more points through the use of colorful floor panels, bumpers and gates.

"Xaria's right." Said Lavender. "This challenge is easy; I doubt anyone could get hurt from this."

* * *

**Confessional: You'd think that … but are you right?**

**Lavender: Chris must be losing his touch; this challenge wasn't even a quarter as bad as yesterday's challenge … is Chris being merciful to lull us into a false sense of security?**

**Chris: No; I could make this challenge very dangerous if I wanted to … but I've set the bumper power to low so you can't get but … but if it was set to maximum … haha!**

* * *

Lavender bounced off another bumper and knocked into a set of six barrels arranged in a triangular fashion; the barrels were sent flying as though they weighed less than a single gram. Lavender managed to run up the table and hit a bumper which shot her up to a platinum bumper at the top of the pinball table. Lavenders ball was travelling at quite a speed and hit a lone bumper quite hard which sent Lavender towards the bottom of the arena and into the exit arena which ended her run.

"My head feels like a merry go round at the carnival." Said Lavender as a dizzy feeling entered her noggin as she slowly made her way back to the rest of the campers in a slightly lopsided walk.

"Boy Lavender; you look as stupid as a guy named Bob with an expression like that!" Laughed Chris. "Are all red heads that lame?"

Barney walked up to Chris and held a threatening fist to his face.

"For your own safety me adversary I advise you to shut up yaaar!" Threatened Barney which really scared Chris.

"Eep! Um, err … anyway; Lavender did quite well with a total of …

…

…

…

…

…

Twenty thousand and eighty points."

"Alright!" Cheered Lavender. "That means I'm in second place then."

"Indeed it does." Said Chris. "But you won't get the special prize! Haha!"

"Who cares about the prize?" Asked Lavender. "It's probably not worth the effort anyway."

"…I really don't like you." Scowled Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Why does he hate her anyway?**

**Chris: **(Censored to the power of infinity).

* * *

"Ok; I think its time for the fifth person." Said Chris as he reached into the hat and took out a coin with Nakia's face on it. "Nakia; you're up!"

"I don't want to do this." Whined Nakia. "Last time I was in a ball I got covered in itching powder."

"Wallace is not here now so there is no chance of that happening; if you don't do it then you're going to be kicked off the game again." Threatened Chris impatiently.

"Ok! I'm going!" Said Nakia in fear as she quickly ran to get into a ball.

* * *

**Confessional: Threats always work.**

**Nakia: I don't wanna lose!**

* * *

Nakia was shot into the arena in her ball and quickly lost her footing and hit a bumper. Nakia was catapulted across the pinball table into a spinner and after a couple tens of speedy rotations she was thrown out at quite a speed and smacked into the other side of the pinball table. Nakia could be heard screaming, this was because her hair was getting messed up which was something that caused her to go into hysterics.

"Heeeeeeeeelp!" Wailed Nakia as she was tossed around in her ball.

Nakia hit a bumper one more time and quickly fell downwards to the bottom of the pinball table and to the exit which ended her rather disappointing and poor run.

* * *

**Confessional: A Smore beats a low score.**

**Tabitha: Nakia is a whiner and very stupid … but I need her vote … one of these days I can really see myself telling her she has outlived her usefulness.**

* * *

Nakia was shaking as and brushing her hair as she walked back to the others; nobody cheered for her as nobody really liked her that much. Nakia just soothed herself with an extended hair brushing session.

"Well then … I think it's fairly clear that Nakia didn't do to well." Laughed Chris. "And what's more her hair looks ugly!"

"Don't call my hair ugly you meanie!" Snarled Nakia.

"I guess the quality of your hair doesn't really affect a person's challenge performance then." Said Eleanor.

"Good point." Agreed Jimmy. "Barney has got allegedly bad hair and is winning; Nakia says she has good hair and didn't do to well I think."

"Exactly." Nodded Eleanor.

"Could you runts be quiet?" Asked Chris stropilly. "I need to announce Nakia's score!"

"We're not stopping you." Said Jimmy.

"Shut up!" Barked Chris. "Anyway … Nakia failed to beat Barney's high score by quite a noticeable margin as her score has ended as a grand total of…

…

…

…

…

Two thousand, eight hundred and sixty one points. A pretty poor performance if you ask me."

"I want a do over!" Demanded Nakia.

"Sorry she devil lass … but page sixty seven, paragraph ten line three clearly states … no do over's." Said Barney with a confident expression.

Nakia crossed her arms and glared at Barney in fury.

* * *

**Confessional: Learn to take a loss; it's good for you!**

**Barney: My personal philosophy is … A life without failure is a life without experience. I've failed at things a lot me hearties and by failing I've learned something … trial, fail and succeed me hearties!**

* * *

"Now that Nakia has just flat out blown her chances of winning the challenge or immunity we can move onto the next person to have a go." Said Chris as he once again reached into the hat and took out a coin with Tabitha's face on it. "Looks like its Tabitha's turn next."

Andy knew this was his chance to tell Uzuri about Tabitha and smiled to himself. Tabitha noticed this and unbeknownst to anyone she signaled Kasimar with her eyes while she walked to start her chance to win ever important immunity.

Kasimar immediately got the message; she wanted him to keep an eye on Andy to see what he did next. Sadly Tabitha hadn't ordered him to maul him … but that could wait a while.

"Be right back." Said Andy as he walked behind the others and tapped Uzuri on the back as he passed her. Uzuri followed Andy while wondering what he wanted to say.

* * *

**Confessional: Try to see the truth.**

**Andy: This is my chance; I can bring Tabitha's alliance crashing down … and you know; if she doesn't win immunity she might be gone today!**

**Tabitha: Andy had better keep his mouth shut; I haven't forgotten my threat … and if he blabs then I have every intention of keeping my word. Besides; I doubt Uzuri will believe him anyway.**

* * *

As soon as Andy and Uzuri were a fair distance from the others and out of sight Andy stopped walking and turned to Uzuri.

"Uzuri; I've got something really important to tell you … and this might come as a shock." Said Andy hesitantly.

"What is it … do you have a crush on me?" Asked Uzuri with a giggle.

"No; I don't. You're with Vinnie … and I like someone else." Said Andy quickly. "You see … this is about Tabitha."

"What about her?" Asked Uzuri sounding surprised. "Do you know something embarrassing about her?"

"Not exactly … I'm not sure how to say this … but Tabitha is playing you; she's using you Uzuri." Said Andy seriously and apologetically.

"What?" Said Uzuri in a flat sounding voice.

"It's true … she's been manipulating everyone. She was the one who put apple juice in Spider's drink in the eating challenge."

"Andy…" Said Uzuri as she trailed off but it looked like she wanted to say something.

"I know you thought she was your friend … but she isn't." Said Andy apologetically.

"…Liar!" Growled Uzuri in a very rare display of anger.

"Huh?" Said Andy as he hadn't expected that.

"I can't believe this; you're trying to get me on your side and vote my friend off! I know this is reality television but that sort of lying is wrong!" Said Uzuri as she advanced on Andy and he backed away into a tree and she held up a finger to his face and pointed threateningly.

"Tabitha is a nice girl! She hasn't done anything wrong; maybe you're jealous! Or are you just greedy for the million?" Asked Uzuri in a huff. "Oh and Andy … you've got my vote tonight if you don't win immunity!"

Uzuri turned on her heel and stormed back to the challenge while Andy stood silent before groaning to himself.

"Taking down Tabitha may be a little harder than I first thought." Mumbled the Asian astronaut to be.

As Andy trudged back to the challenge after Uzuri he didn't realize that Kasimar had been hidden from sight and had heard everything. Kasimar smirked to himself.

"Oh Andy; naughty, naughty! Tabitha won't like this!" Smirked Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: Oh no … this is gonna be a problem…**

**Andy: That didn't go as I planned … but at least Tabitha didn't hear it … unless Uzuri tells her. But maybe she won't. Aw man, I didn't expect that to happen.**

**Uzuri: Maybe Andy has Tabitha confused with Kasimar. I don't like liars and Andy is telling a big old porky pete!**

**Kasimar: I hope Tabitha lets me hurt Mable … I've been itching to break her arms and ankles ever since she puked in my face. **

* * *

"And Tabitha has scored an impressive nineteen thousand two hundred and twenty points." Said Chris. "Not enough to beat Barney or Lavender but enough for immunity I'd say."

"What can I say Chris? It's all about balance." Said Tabitha with a very false humble smile.

As Tabitha rejoined the group Uzuri walked up with a frown on her face and Andy followed; Uzuri shot a brief glare at Andy and Tabitha immediately realized that she had not believed any of what Andy had told her. She still had her pawn; her puppet if you will.

"Ok then losers; the next person to attempt the challenge is going to be …

…

…

…

Spider." Said Chris as he took a coin with Spider's face on it out of the hat.

"Fine by me; this *cough* sounds fun." Shrugged Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm skeptical about that part myself.**

**Spider: It also sounds ***cough* **like a very good chance to lose ***cough* **more fat.**

**Andy: Now's probably a good time to talk to Barney about something that's been bugging me today.**

* * *

While Spider went to start his run on the pinball table Andy approached Barney while not noticing Tabitha glancing at him calculatingly.

"Hey Barney; I need to talk to you about something important." Whispered Andy. "Like right now."

"Not a problem me heartie." Said Barney as he took out a signpost with the word 'BRB' on it and put it into the sand. "Be right back that means."

As Andy and barney walked a distance away behind a large boulder Tabitha gave Kasimar another signal with her eyes.

* * *

**Confessional: Putting a tail on them … and I don't mean like pin the tail on the donkey ok?**

**Barney: From the look on me hearties face I'd say he is having troubles with his feelings for Mable … aye; well, I'm always ready to help a friend so help him I shall!**

* * *

"So Andy boy." Said Barney once they were out of earshot from the others. "What's up? And I don't mean the sky me heartie."

"Well … I've got a lot on my mind … and I'm having a few doubts." Said Andy uncertainly. "…About Mable."

Kasimar was listening from the other side of the rock and silently cackled that his mind games were working.

"Really? But why yaaaar? I thought you loved her." Said Barney sounding concerned.

"I do … its just … does she love me? I mean; she's always nice to me and I've seen her wink at me before … but…" Andy trailed off.

"But what?" Asked barney while hanging on Andy's every word.

"What if it's just an act? What if Mable is just pretending to like me so that she can further herself in the game; other people in shows like this have done similar things." Said Andy with a sad sigh. "And do I really know the true her?"

"Well … what do you think of Mable me heartie?" Asked Barney.

"Well … I think she's pretty and not only tough and strong but also compassionate and a genuinely nice person; I love her … but … when Kasimar-." Began Andy.

"Hold up; did Kasimar say something to you?" Asked Barney with a sudden firm tone at the thought of the horrible bully.

"Yes; he said how do I know Mable isn't faking it so she can use me to help her win the million. He also said he knows her better than he as he's on her team." Explained Andy.

"Ok; I speak as your best friend here me heartie … I am positively purple that Mable has feelings for you; I've seen her glance at you and also you two get along great. And your heart is telling you that you love the blue haired sea lass … and who are you going to listen to? Your heart and your best friend … or a raging sociopath yaaar?" Asked Barney kindly.

"…My heart and you." Said Andy as he started to smile.

"Exactly; it seems to me that Kasimar was just trying to mess with your head and throw you off your game because he sees you as a threat. Don't listen to him; just follow your own feelings and you'll get a happily ever after … it worked for me yaaar!" Said barney proudly.

"Thanks Barney; my spirits feel completely rejuvenated now." Said Andy gratefully. "And can I ask you something?"

"Obviously; you just asked me then! But ask anything else too." Said Barney.

"Are you an A student? You have the intelligence of a prodigy!" Said Andy.

Barney gulped; he was cornered now … but Andy was his best friend so Barney could tell him.

"I'll let you in on a secret me heartie … I'm on the honor roll back at school and I get straight A's." explained Barney. "I was embarrassed about people thinking of me as a geek though … as somebody uncool."

"Barney … you are _anything_ but uncool." Said Andy.

"Thanks yaaar … you know; that wasn't so hard to admit; maybe I'll tell the others after the challenge." Smiled Barney.

"If you want to … now let's get back to the challenge; I don't want to miss my turn." Said Andy as he and Barney left back to the pinball table.

* * *

**Confessional: Heartwarming Alert!**

**Andy: I feel a lot better now … the problem with Tabitha remains … but I think I'll tell Mable how I feel now; and Barney might be right, she could feel the same way as me.**

**Barney: you've done good barney … you've done good.**

**Kasimar: #bleep#! Darn it! That stupid pirate ruined everything! Oh how I want to dissect him like a dead pig! Grrrr!**

* * *

Kasimar stood in a concealed spot behind the rock for a moment as Andy and barney disappeared from his view. Tabitha walked up to him a moment later with a thoughtful look on her face.

"Kasimar; I can't figure it out." Said Tabitha.

"Figure what out? Why the government hasn't fell yet?" Asked Kasimar.

"No … how is Spider doing so good at the challenges? He won immunity yesterday and he just scored fifteen thousand and three points! How is he doing so well despite being so ill?" Asked Tabitha in bewilderment.

Kasimar blanched and began explaining.,

"Yeah … that _might_ have something to do with me." Said Kasimar idly.

"What did you do this time?" Asked Tabitha will a grumble.

"I managed to convince him that Quana thought he was fat and was going to leave him; he's been exercising like mental since early yesterday … its no problem though."

"How is it not?" Asked Tabitha incredulously. "He could keep winning immunity!"

"Have you seen how pale he is? If he keeps this up he's going to hurt himself! I bet he'll have heart attack by the end of the day." Smirked Kasimar. "Trust me."

"I don't trust you as far as I can throw you." Said Tabitha with an eye roll. "but I'll take your word for it this time … so; what did Andy say to Uzuri?"

"He tried to tell her about you're actions but she didn't believe him." Shrugged Kasimar. "Want me to maul Mable?"

"Sure … but try not to break her limbs irreparably ok?" Said Tabitha with crossed arms.

"Sure, sure, whatever." Said Kasimar as he left back to the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: Never trust a murderous sociopath; they'll only backstab you in the end.**

**Tabitha: That explains a lot ... but Kasimar is taking it too far; a heart attack might be fatal! Neither me and Kasimar are that nice but I don't want anyone to die … Kasimar on the other hand…**

**Kasimar: I hope Bug dies! Yahahahaha!**

* * *

Spider had scored decently in his run but he looked less than well; he was white as a white sheet and his breathing was hard and unsteady. Quana was standing beside him in great concern.

"Are you alright spider? Do you need a lie down? You look really unwell." Said Quana to her boyfriend.

"I'm *cough* ok; I just *gasp* pushed myself too *choke* hard in the challenge." Said Spider as she swayed a little.

"I think you did more than that; come on Spider, use your inhaler and have a rest; you look like a train wreck."

"Do I?" Mumbled Spider before he started to sway more noticeably before he collapsed unconscious on the sand.

"SPIDER!" Cried Quana. "Are you ok?"

"Of course he's not ok stupid!" Said Chris before laughing sadistically. "Oh boy! He's passed out again! Haha! If it happens a third time then it'll be a running gag; haha!"

Chef walked up and punched Chris in the arm.

"Ow!" wailed Chris.

Chef picked Spider up over his shoulder.

"Don't worry singer; I'll see what's wrong with him; you can see him after the challenge." Said Chef in a surprisingly _nice_ voice ass he carried Spider away.

"…Well that resolved itself nicely." Chuckled Nakia.

"Are you still holding onto that grudge?" Asked Quana in disgust. "Let it go! You're being friggin pathetic!"

"Watch it you Hispanic h-."

"If you finish that sentence I'll kick your ass like I did this morning." Growled Quana.

Nakia whimpered in fright and looked away silently while Quana looked at her unconscious boyfriend being carried away.

"What's going on Spider?" Whispered Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: It's only gonna get worse.**

**Spider: …At the very least ***cough*** the sand was a ***cough*** soft landing. I was unconscious for** *cough*** hours … I'm such a weakling.**

**Quana: As much as I'd have liked to sit beside Spider's bed until he awakened Chris said if I left the challenge I would immediately walk the dock of shame.** (Quana sniffles sadly). **It's the eating challenge all over again.**

* * *

Chris reached into the hat and took out a coin with Xaria's face on it.

"It's time for the bumblebee to make some honey!" Jeered Chris.

"My name isn't bumble bee!" Growled Xaria. "It's Xaria Josie Clark!"

"Whatever! You're still going to lose the challenge!" Sneered Chris.

"Oh yeah? I'm gonna win this; I'll show you!" Smirked Xaria as she went to get into a ball.

**Confessional: Show him what? A rock?**

* * *

**Xaria:** (Smirking victoriously).** I sure showed him.**

**Chris: **(Looking stunned). **She sure showed me.**

* * *

Xaria was blasted into the pinball table; she instantly gained control of the ball and began to smash down barrels and hit bumpers in a very quick speed. She bounced off another bumper and onto the railings before coming down from them and going through a gate. Xaria hit a hidden red button on the side of the arena which opened a gate that contained a rainbow colored bumper; Xaria hit in and triggered many flashing lights as she began to bounce around the bumpers some more. As Xaria continued to rack up a high score Chris could only watch in disbelief.

* * *

**Confessional: The call of the pinball. Roar!**

**Xaria: I wasn't lying when I said I was good at pinball.**

**Eleanor: Go Xaria! Show Chris who's boss! What kind of a childhood did that mean man have anyway?**

* * *

Xaria exited the pinball table and approached the others a few minutes later; she was met with thunderous applause and a stunned look on Chris's smug snake face.

"How … how." Stammered Chris as he looked at the paper showing Xaria's score.

"Jealous?" Smirked Xaria. "So … what's my score Chris?"

"… You got … forty thousand, nine hundred and eighty points. That puts you in first place by quite a considerable margin." Said Chris begrudgingly. "Looks like you're not getting voted off tonight."

"Good." Smiled Xaria as she rejoined the others with her hands in her pockets.

"You're still a bumblebee though! Haha!" Laughed Chris in an attempt to upset Xaria.

"Oh go to hell Chris." Said Xaria with an eye roll at Chris's immaturity.

* * *

**Confessional: Say hi to the man in red for me Chris!**

**Mable: Looks like Lavender and Xaria are both through; I just hope I can do the same … if not it isn't like the other would vote for me instead of Kasimar or Nakia, right?**

* * *

"Next up to risk their life for points is Andy." Said Chris as he took a coin with Andy's face on it out of the hat. "I think I'm going to really enjoy this! Haha!"

"Just like I'll enjoy your annual end of season karma." Said Andy as he approached the pinball table to begin his turn in the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm looking forward to it as well! Mwuhahaha!**

**Andy: Thanks to Barney I feel as though my mojo is back to bursting point; I think I'll tell Mable how I feel after the challenge … and nether of us are to get voted off. Nakia is definitely not going to win immunity so I think its her time to walk the dock of shame.**

**Nakia: Why is everyone so jealous and mean? They should act their age and do what they are supposed to do … let me win!**

* * *

Andy was launched up into the pinball table; with a new sense of determination he began to hit bumpers and floor spots that gave him a goodly amount of points. Andy knocked over barrels like a bowling ball and rode up a ramp and down the other side into a bumper. Andy maneuvered his ball like a pro as he went over a spinning part of the floor which sent him into a quartet of green and purple bumpers with quite some force. Andy began to bounce along them and after about twelve seconds of this he was blasted out and rolled quickly to the bottom of the table but not before slamming down another barrel.

* * *

**Confessional: Donkey Kong! That would be a really good challenge.**

**Andy: I not only think I did well at that challenge but I also enjoyed it; most of the challenges Chris sets for us are pretty nasty … like the torture challenge which I would very much like to forget ever happened.**

* * *

Andy arrived back to the group and was met with applause. Andy smiled modestly as another random intern handed Chris a piece of paper which had Andy's score on it.

"Well Andy; you may be first alphabetically but you didn't come first." Sneered Chris.

"You scored a grand total of…

…

…

…

…

…

Fourteen thousand points exactly. I somehow doubt you're going to get immunity tonight! Haha!"

"Lets see you do any better then Chris." Said Andy calmly.

"Are you crazy? I could get hurt!" Said Chris in fear.

"Fair enough scaredy cat." Said Andy as he stood with the others beside Mable who smiled at him.

"I am not a scaredy cat you big mean meanie face!" Barked Chris pathetically as usual.

After a moment of silence the twelve campers burst into laughter at Chris while Chris just stomped his feet angrily.

* * *

**Confessional: I won't miss Chris.**

**Chris: Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!**

**Quana: Is it just me or is Chris getting more immature, dumb and angry everyday? I'd answer in the affirmative … I can't get my mind off Spider; I hope he's ok.**

* * *

"Ok; we've still got a few people who have yet to go." Said Chris as he once again reached into the hat; this time he came out with a coin that had Quana's face on it. "Ok Quana; you're up … but I doubt you'll do that good with your pathetic boyfriend being crippled and all! Haha!"

Quana scowled as she walked past Chris and punched him in the face.

* * *

**Confessional: POW! Right in the kisser!**

**Quana: I really don't like it when Chris insults Spider; I don't insult his girlfriend … oh wait; he doesn't have one and probably never will.**

* * *

Quana started her run on the pinball table but even as she started scoring points and bumpers her mind was definitely elsewhere. Was Spider alright? This was the second time he had passed out so far … and this time he could he even worse off than last time. Quana really cared about Spider and he was special to her. It appalling the way Nakia treated him and Quana did _not_ want Nakia to get the last laugh.

Quana hit the bumpers and went through a gate thus scoring more points. But her heart didn't seem to be in it anymore; a minute later she bounced of a large bumper and rolled down to the exit area and ended her turn.

* * *

**Confessional: Turn around please.**

**Spider: I wish I could have seen Quana's turn in the pinball machine; she probably did great.**

* * *

"Boy Quana; you didn't do so well … not that I'd expect any different for a ditz." Said Chris as he looked at the paper with Quana's score. "You scored better than Nakia though with a total of …

…

…

…

…

Twelve thousand five hundred and twenty points. Not enough for immunity or the prize though! Nyeh!" Laughed Chris in an attempt to get a reaction out of Quana.

"Whatever." Said Quana not caring about what Chris said in the slightest.

"Hey! You're supposed to get upset! CRY DAMMIT!" Roared Chris in frustration.

"Why not you?" Asked Barney. "You've cried in the confessional enough me land lubber crybaby."

"…Shut up!" Whined Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Rough day for Mr. Maclean.**

**Chris: **(Howling and crying like a little baby). **Why is everyone being so mean to me? I'm the main character! They're just meanies! Waaaaaaah! Boo hoo!**

**Xaria: Props to Barney for making Chris cry; I can see why Lavender likes him so much.**

* * *

"Ok then; only three campers left to have a go at Pinball Peril." Said Chris dramatically. "Eleanor; Mable and Kasimar … which of you will be next?"

"How about me? This looks fun." Smiled Eleanor.

"No! You don't get to decide! The hat does!" Barked Chris as eh reached in and took out a coin with Eleanor's face on it. "The hat has chosen you so stop complaining!"

"I wasn't complaining." Blinked Eleanor.

"Just go!" Snapped Chris.

"Whatever you say Chris." Said Eleanor as she walked to the pinball machine to start her turn while mumbling to herself about Chris having issues.

* * *

**Confessional: Issue number one; the pilot episode!**

**Eleanor: I really try and see the good in people … but I can't see that much in Chris … it could be to do with how sadistic he is. Uzuri is sadistic too but at least she's sweet and friendly.**

**Chris: Shut up! I'm a sadist and proud of it!**

**Chef: That explains quite a lot.**

* * *

Eleanor started her turn in the game of Pinball Peril by hitting a bunch of bumpers after being shot into the pinball arena. Eleanor, like Jimmy, was one of the lighter contestants and was thus having some trouble staying on her feet. If only she was better at gym class.

Eleanor had to hold onto her hat with one hand while her blond hair whipped around due to the impressive speed of the ball.

PING!

Eleanor hit a glowing bumper and a number of retro 'bing' sounds amplified around the pinball table as a fair number of lights glowed like neon.

"Woooooo hoooooooo!" Cheered Eleanor as she rolled around inside her ball with an excited and energetic look on her face.

After a few more bounces and rebounds Eleanor's ball drifted into the bottom of the table and into the exit zone.

* * *

**Confessional: Fun ferret flight!**

**Eleanor: That was like a roller coaster! I always did like riding them at the funfair; though I don't think Frost and Dandelion would agree even if they had ever ridden on one.**

* * *

"How did I do Chris?" Asked Eleanor as she arrived back with the group.

"Maybe." Shrugged Chris.

"That doesn't make much sense." Said Eleanor as she tilted her head to the side.

"Takes one to know one." Smirked Chris.

"I'm wasting my time." Said Eleanor as she walked over to Jimmy with an eye roll at Chris.

"Hey! I'm not wasting your time! Every second with me is like a lifetime spent well!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; your score totals to the amount of…

…

…

…

…

Thirteen thousand eight hundred and fifty points. Not enough for immunity! Haha!"

"Ah well; I had fun in this challenge." Shrugged Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: And that's what matters … along with what hotdogs are made of.**

**Eleanor: What can I say; I liked this challenge. I didn't win but I think I'll scrape through the Bonfire Ceremony tonight … I hope the others do as well … except for Kasimar and Nakia … they're really mean.**

* * *

"Ok then; Kasimar … Mable. It's just you two who haven't had a turn yet, who's gonna be next?" Asked Chris as he deliberately reached into the hat slowly.

"Could you hurry it up Chris? I've got better things to do than stand around here like a girl at the mall." Said Kasimar with crossed arms and a frown. "And besides; I want to win immunity again."

"If you want to stay here then you should." Said Mable. "As soon as you are votable you're going to be off this rotten island faster than you can say pie … which is a very quick for to say."

"Keep dreaming bitch." Scoffed Kasimar.

"And Kasimar is the next one to go." Said Chris as he held up a coin with Kasimar's snarling face on it. "That means Mable is going last. Good luck Kasimar."

"Boo! Boo!" Jeered Barney and Lavender quickly joined in with the booing.

"Ah go and get castrated." Snapped Kasimar as he approached the pinball table. But not only did he have to win immunity he also had to think of a way to hurt Mable; beating her up would be fun … but after she puked in his face accidently a few days ago he felt something more brutal was in order.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm crossing my completely none existent fingers that Kasimar is going to lose!**

**Lavender: This could be the moment that Kasimar loses! Oh if that happens I want to remember it forever!**

**Jimmy: I'll be thankful when Kasimar is gone; after what he did to poor Gary and Raven I'm wondering why he hasn't been disqualified yet.**

* * *

Kasimar started his run on the pinball table by hitting the bumpers and bouncing off them into a gold bumper and rolling over a brightly colored part of the ground. He rode up the ramp to the railing above the floor and landed down through the score gate and smashed over a bunch of barrels.

Kasimar's run was quite a strong one; he managed to remain standing all the time and kept a good speed going as well as never getting close to the bottom of the pinball table. Most of the other campers were booing and jeering at Kasimar in an attempt to throw him off his game but Kasimar didn't make any mistakes nor did he trip.

Eventually Kasimar hit a bumper which knocked him down into the exit but he felt confident that he had done enough to get to the next round.

* * *

**Confessional: I sense deviousness on the near horizon.**

**Kasimar: After I got out of my ball I set about making sure Andy suffers and Mable regrets crossing me … harsh but necessary … and totally hilarious! Yahahaha!**

* * *

Kasimar got out of his ball and saw the exit just a short distance away; he also saw what appeared to be the pinball table control panel next to him. As nobody could currently see him Kasimar set to work. He scanned his eyes over the workings and came across a turn dial that controlled the power of the bumpers; it was set at twenty percent.

"Hmm; if it is already strong at twenty percent … lets see how it does at one hundred percent." Cackled Kasimar nastily as he turned the dial to maximum and left through the exit up to Chris and the others.

"Well Chris; how did I do?" Asked Kasimar gruffly.

"Pretty good my man." Congratulated Chris. "You've got a total of…

…

…

…

…

Twenty six thousand, seven hundred and eighty."

"Yeah!" Cheered Kasimar as he smirked at the others.

"Aw crap!" Grumbled Lavender. "So much for getting rid of him tonight."

"We still have plenty of chances." Assured Mable.

"Ok then; Mable, you're the only one left to go." Said Chris. "Try not to get too hurt in there."

"Good luck Mable." Said Andy.

"Thank you Andy." Smiled Mable sweetly.

* * *

**Confessional: I can't watch; I'm looking away now.**

**Andy: Ok … after Mable completes her challenge I'm telling her that I love her.**

**Mable: No doubt about it … after I finish the challenge I'm going to tell Andy I love him.**

**Kasimar: This oughta be good!**

**Tabitha: I wonder what Kasimar did; he gave me a signal that he did something … guess we'll wait and see I suppose.**

* * *

Mable got into her ball and was sent into the arena. She headed straight for a bumper start scoring points.

It all went downhill from there in a _**BIG**_ way.

Because of the increased power of the bumper Mable was sent flying at a very high speed into another bumper which sent her to another and so the cycle continued. She was racking up points but everyone on the ground could tell something was wrong.

"Hey; why is Mable bouncing around so much? That didn't happen to us." Said Uzuri in confusion.

"Heeeeeeeeelp!" Screamed Mable from within her ball.

Suddenly…

Mable hit a bumper at such a speed that when she ricocheted off she was sent flying right OUT of the pinball table, over the heads of Chris and the other campers, and straight into a large boulder.

SMASH!

Mable's ball smashed to pieces and she ended up lying on the sand groaning in pain … a large piece of glass stuck in her leg.

"Oh my god!" Screamed Andy in horror and he immediately rushed to Mable's aid with the other contestants not far behind.

Andy knelt beside Mable as she looked up at him.

"Mable! Are you ok? Somebody get Chef!" Ordered Andy.

"Sorry Andy; he's busy with Spider; Mable's just going to have to sit tight. And if she bleeds to death it'll be GREAT for ratings! Haha!" Laughed Chris in his most horrible and sadistic tone yet.

Andy slowly turned and looked at Chris with a look of _pure_ hatred and loathing. He quickly took a towel from his pocket and dabbed Mable's wound and began to use it as a make shift bandage while making sure to avoid the piece of glass.

"Andy … it hurts." Whispered Mable in pain.

"You'll be ok." Promised Andy. "Right now we've got to get you to the medical tent and fast."

Andy gently picked Mable up bridal style with surprisingly little difficulty as he quickly carried her away to the mess hall.

As they walked away everyone turned to Kasimar who didn't look the least bit bothered.

"You did this." Said Lavender; her voice a deadly whisper of anger and fury.

"You can't prove it … and what would I have to gain from doing it this way? I could have more effectively beaten her up." Shrugged Kasimar. "Either way … it wasn't me."

"Mr. Maclean." Said an intern. "The bumper strength dial was turned to maximum. The dial itself is loose … I told you we should have fixed it!"

"Fine; repair it ASAP." Said Chris without much care or compassion for what had happened. "Anyway; I believe Mable scored eight thousand four hundred points. Time to dish out immunity."

"How can you dish out immunity at a time like this?" Asked Xaria in ultimate disgust. "Mable is really hurt!"

"Not my problem; now zip it or I'll have you thrown off the show and I'll sue you for breaching contract!"

Xaria questioned down but was glowering in anger.

"Ok; out of the … eleven of you plus Spider and Mable; six of you are immune. Uzuri, Barney, Lavender, Tabitha and Kasimar are all immune tonight." Said Chris while acting as though nothing had happened. "Xaria had far and away the best score so she not only wins immunity but the special prize. Today's special prize is…

…

…

…

…

…

A pinball table that you will receive after the show!"

"…Whatever." Muttered Xaria.

"You teens are so unappreciative; well, I have my fourth daily massage in a few minutes so I'm outta here!" Announced Chris. "I'll see you all at the bonfire ceremony; pick your favorite loser to kick off."

Chris left and the campers looked amongst themselves in horror at what had happened, even Tabitha was mortified. Kasimar seemed not to care and Nakia was thinking.

"At least she had bad hair." Said Nakia.

"Shut the FUCK up you bitch!" Screamed Lavender in rage. "Is hair the only thing you can think about? My best friend has just taken a serious injury! You should be ashamed of yourself!"

Lavender stormed away and Barney quickly followed her after scowling at Nakia who looked stunned.

"I'm going to go and check on Spider." Said Quana in a timid voice. "Oh this is really bad, really super bad! Two people injured in one day … is the money even worth all this?"

* * *

**Confessional: No joke to make; this is too serious.**

**Kasimar: Yahahahaha! That worked out even better than I thought it would! I'll watch that scene a lot on the uncut DVD of the season!**

**Tabitha: **(She is pale in shock and seems horrified). **Oh my god. I never wanted something like that to happen … I just wanted Kasimar to rough her up! Not for her to end up **_**bleeding**_**. Why did I ally with him? He's insane! But … I really regret to say I need him. Mum and Dad may be proud of my strategy … but this time I'm ashamed…**

**Xaria: That's **_**it**_** Kasimar; this means **_**war**_**!**

* * *

Mable was soon bought into the medical tent and laid on a bed. While Chef immediately got to work on treating her injury Andy got to Mable's side. Spider was still unconscious.

"Ow." Whimpered Mable in pain.

"You can squeeze my hand if you want." Offered Andy.

"Thank you Andy." Said Mable gratefully.

A few minutes passed by in silence before Andy spoke.

"I don't know how this happened." Said Andy even though he guessed it was Tabitha but he didn't want to make Mable cause herself pain. "When I find out who did this I'll _destroy_ them."

"Don't Andy … these things happen … ow." Said Mable softly. "Well … looks like my time on wawanakwa is just about over. Shame really … there are still some things I wanted to do."

"Like what?" Asked Andy as Mable squeezed his hand.

"Well…" Began Mable but she trailed off.

"Please continue; you can tell me anything." Said Andy nicely.

"Ok … Andy; I've only known you for a little over two weeks … but I love you." Said Mable.

Chef finished removing the glass from Mable's wound and quickly left mumbled something about cooking dinner when he really just wanted to give the two teens some privacy.

"Really? How long?" Asked Andy in a soft voice while never letting go of Mable's hand.

"Since about the time you helped me in the fear challenge." Replied Mable. "I just wanted to tell you before I left."

"…I love you too Mable." Smiled Andy. "I have for a fair while now; it's why I helped you in the fear challenge. I was going to tell you after the challenge … but now this has happened. If only I could have prevented it."

"It's in the past; what's done is done." Replied Mable. "I may be in pain … but being with you … well … it almost makes the pain completely vanish."

"Likewise." Whispered Andy.

The Japanese male and the blue haired female looked into each others eyes and leaned in for a tender kiss. After they parted both smiled.

"So … are we a couple now?" Asked Mable. "Because I'd like for us to be."

"We are." Smiled Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: Awwwwwwwwww! That was so heartwarming and romantic!**

**Mable: That moment alone makes up for all the suffering I have endured in this competition.**

**Andy: While I feel extremely furious at Tabitha … I think it can wait at least a while.**

* * *

At that moment Barney, Quana and Lavender came in and saw Andy and Mable holding hands.

"Well, well, it looks like this is a happy ending after all." Said Barney with a tip of his hat. "Yaaar! This is so heart warming!"

"Are you ok Mable?" Asked Lavender as she sat on a chair beside the bed.

"I've been better." Admitted Mable. "But … I don't feel too bad to be honest … though my leg is still really hurting."

While her four friends conversed Quana moved over to Spider while feeling immense sympathy for Mable. Quana sat on the side of the bed her boyfriend was in and looked down at him.

"Oh spider; … are you ok?" Asked Quana sadly. "What am awful day this has been."

Spider's eyes fluttered and slowly opened; he looked up and saw Quana looking down on him.

"Hello Quana; you *cough* look pretty.2 smiled spider before he suddenly noticed Mable in the bed next to his and gasped. "What happened to *cough* Mable? Please tell *cough* me that she is alright."

"She's ok now … but it's a pretty serious injury." Admitted Quana. "First you and now her. I suspect Kasimar of doing that to her but I have no proof … and speaking of which … are you ok?"

"I'm fine … I just feel a *cough* little woozy and *cough* sick." Shrugged Spider. "And I feel starving … but *cough* other than that…"

"Spider; I want to ask you a question … and please be honest, ok?" Asked Quana softly and kindly.

"Ok Quana; anything *cough* for you." Nodded spider.

"Why have you been acting so odd lately? You're pushing yourself too hard and exercising like mad and you're not eating as far as I know. What's wrong? Is something bothering you?" asked Quana as she knelt on the floor so her head was level with Spider. "I love you Spider and thus I really care about you; tell me what's wrong please."

"Well … ok." Said Spider with a nod. "I've … become fairly *cough* conscious about my weight *cough* lately being that I'm fat."

"You're not fat." Said Quana sounding surprised.

"But you said I *cough* was." Mumbled spider.

"Did I?" Blinked Quana. "If I did I certainly didn't mean too."

"Well you said I *cough* had junk in my *cough* trunk." Said Spider. "And Kasimar warned me that *cough* girls don't like fat guys and-."

"Ok; I'll stop you there." Said Quana as she briefly nuzzled noses with spider. "What I meant was that you had a nice butt … but … maybe I was too vague. And it seems to me that Kasimar was playing on these insecurities of yours in an attempt to make your hurt yourself. Listen; I don't think you're fat … I think you're a handsome and truly wonderful boy."

"Really? Wow … I feel so *cough* stupid; why did I listen *cough* to Kasimar? I'm such an *cough* idiot." Said Spider in both relief and shame.

"You're not stupid." Cooed Quana. "Love makes people do silly things … ask my dad. So … out of curiosity did you lose any weight?"

"Err … about … two *cough* pounds." Admitted Spider.

"That doesn't sound good; ok, we'd better get you some food … real food." Said Quana in an almost motherly tone. "Now; I think I'll be your personal nurse from now on; you may be sixteen but I think you could use a little help … and who better than your girlfriend?"

"Thank *cough* you Quana." Smiled Spider happily.

"Oh; and if I ever say something you don't like or anything that makes you feel uncomfortable … just tell me. In a relationship the couple trusts each other; I know you trust me and I certainly trust you … my little arachnid." Smiled Quana.

"I appreciate that my Hispanic beauty." Flirted Spider.

"Now; maybe tonight you can sleep with me; you could probably use some support and perhaps a cuddle buddy." Giggled Quana. "But before that…"

Quana leaned and she and Spider began to kiss.

* * *

**Confessional: …I love romance! **

**Quana: Thank goodness that's sorted out; everything is gonna be back to normal … and with luck Nakia will go instead of Mable. What a day … and I must say that Spider is a really good kisser! Hahaha!**

**Lavender: **(she is angry and sad). **Kasimar is going to rot in hell for eternity one day. Poor Mable…**

**Spider: I love Quana; I ***sneeze*** made a stupid mistake but ***cough* **she still loves me. Coming on this show ***hard cough* **is the best thing that has ever happened ***gag* **to me.**

**Tabitha: Andy is probably going to confront me soon. I admit I feel terrible … but I can't let Andy blow my cover … if I don't win… **(Tabitha trails off) … **Well; I have my reasons for my actions.**

* * *

The thirteen campers sat around the Bonfire Pit on logs and stumps. Quana and Spider were holding hands as were Andy and Mable. Mable now had her right leg in a cast and had crutches. Kasimar was smirking to himself and the atmosphere was quite tense. The moon was up and the stars were twinkling. It would have been a beautiful night if not for the events of the day.

Chris arrived after a minute or two with a tray of twelve marshmallows. He set in down on the oil drum he always stood behind and looked over the campers.

"Hey guys. It's that time of the day again … time for somebody to leave the Island and lose any chance of winning the million dollars. Today's episode is definitely the best yet! It had thrills, swearing and even blood! Haha!"

"Shut up Chris!" snapped Lavender.

"Fine; whatever. Ok; on my tray I have twelve marshmallow … yet there are twelve of you. When I call your name come and get a marshmallow. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must _immediately_ walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means that you are out of the contest … and you can't come back … ever."

"Like how I came back?" Asked Andy.

"Shut it! I mean is this time! Nobody else is coming back to rejoin the competition!" Growled Chris as he picked up the first marshmallow. "

"The first marshmallow's go to those who are immune.

"Xaria"

"Kasimar"

"Barney"

"Lavender"

"Tabitha"

"Uzuri"

The sic whose names had been called got up and each took a marshmallow. Six marshmallows were left on the plate and seven campers still didn't have one.

"Ok; now for those who aren't immune. The first of you challenge losers through is...

…

…

Spider"

"Jimmy"

"Eleanor"

"Quana"

"Andy"

Nakia and Mable remained without a marshmallow; Mable looked like she had accepted her fate while Nakia looked confident and smug. Andy prayed with all his heart that Nakia would be the one voted off … maybe Mable would stay … maybe.

"Mable … Nakia … this is the final marshmallow. Whoever does not get this must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back ever. Tonight's final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Nakia."

Nakia smugly looked at Mable while claiming her marshmallow.

"Well cripple; the dock of shame awaits." Smirked Chris. He was met with a rock to the head. "Ow!"

Mable got up from her stump and began to walk with her crutches. Everyone besides Kasimar and Nakia said goodbye and gave a good farewell. Mable stopped in front if Andy.

"Oh Mable; I wish it didn't have to end like this." Sighed Andy sadly.

"Don't worry about it Andy; I made the final thirteen … and I met you." Smiled Mable as she gave Andy a peck on the cheek. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too Mable." Said Andy as he hugged his girlfriend.

After one last farewell Mable walked the dock of shame on crutches and boarded it. The boat then set off into the moonlit night for Playa des losers.

"Farewell dear sweet Mable." Whispered Andy.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a smile on his face as he waved to the camera.

"What a dramatic end to the episode don't you think? Spider passes out, Mable gets an injury and much to my relief Kasimar gets to stay! Haha! With Mable gone only twelve campers remain. The game is going to get tough now as the challenges get harder and harder … or maybe I'm feeling generous and I'll make them merciful, I'm not telling! Haha!"

Chris laughed and clapped his hands as he looked at the camera again.

"Who will be the next camper to walk the dock of shame? What will the next challenge be? What will Andy do to Tabitha now? Will Kasimar hurt anybody else? And which is better; PS3, X Box or Wii? Find out next time on Total Dramas letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Andy: Nakia

Barney: Mable

Eleanor: Mable

Jimmy: Mable

Kasimar: Mable

Lavender: Kasimar (Doesn't count)

Mable: Nakia

Nakia: Mable

Quana: Nakia

Spider: Nakia

Tabitha: Mable

Uzuri: Mable

Xaria: Nakia

Mable: 7

Nakia: 5

Kasimar: 1 (Doesn't count)

Voted Off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable.

* * *

I wish I didn't have to do that … but it had to be done. Well; now Mable is gone (thankfully on a high note) and twelve campers remain. We're definitely over halfway to the end! What will Andy do now that this has happened to his girlfriend? Let's hope nothing too drastic.

Sorry for those of you (probably everyone) who wanted Kasimar to go … but his tyranny on Wawanakwa isn't scheduled to end just yet. But trust me now; when the time arrives … Kasimar will meet his BRUTAL karmatic downfall and get EVERYTHING that he deserves. Just keep rooting for your favorite character and looking forward to Kasimar's end in the game.

Cheers everyone!

If you, liked this chapter then why not leave a review? Got a question about something in the story? PM me and I'll answer as best I can so long as it isn't a big spoiler.

Next time: It's cosplay time ... with video game characters?


	38. Day 18, Part 1, Life As a Cosplayer

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his masterpiece of a story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would be very grateful if you did not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains cuddling, hair related discrimination, Blackmail, Cosplaying, shout outs to video games and a bully without remorse. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender** JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's interesting fact:** Kasimar's surname was originally Tarsh (because it can be rearranged to spell trash) but I changed it to McSkeen because in my opinion it has a sadistic ring to it. So Kasimar's full name is Kasimar Horace McSkeen. Bet you didn't know that!

**Note: **Milestone reached! As of this chapter I have officially overtaken Total Drama Comeback in the word total. And I still have eleven episodes to go which includes the one you are reading now. In fact; I'm wondering if I might be the very first person in the Total Drama Fandom to have a story that tops the five hundred thousand word mark. I am proud that I have come this far in writing the story; it actually doesn't seem that long ago I started it … but enough talking! You came here for cheap laughed and some romance and drama … and receive it you shall. On with the show!

Do not argue with an idiot; he will only end up dragging you down to his level.

* * *

Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame late at night; it was day eighteen of Total Drama Letterz and less than half of the campers remained. Chris also has a T shirt on with a crudely drawn picture of Mario … Chris probably made it himself.

"Last time On Total Drama Letterz. The final thirteen took part in a pinball challenge … though it wasn't like they actually had a choice or anything! Haha! The campers went in a random order in the ever fair method of picking coins out of a hat … and I hate fairness! It makes for bad television and therefore bad ratings and a reduced paycheck!"

"Some of the campers did really good like Kasimar, Barney and Xaria who was much to my surprise actually good at something for a change. But there were also campers who didn't do too well such as Quana and Nakia; the latter flat out sucked! Haha!"

"A lot of drama happened; far more than any episode; two, count them two, campers received injuries. Spider and Mable were both sent to the infirmary; spider lost consciousness because he pushed himself too hard, mainly because of the weight paranoia Kasimar duped him into. This caused Quana to perform not that well when she had a go due to her worrying about her dumb cripple of a boyfriend; haha!"

"Mable's injury was not only more series but it was dramatic and funny too … better not let Andy hear that. Kasimar adjusted the bumper power to maximum and Mable was sent flying out of the pinball table and into a boulder where her ball smashed leaving her with a shard of glass stuck in her leg. Nakia said this was no big deal, justifying it because Mable's hair was bad. Lavender called her out on it and even swore at her."

"While Kasimar, Xaria, Barney, Lavender, Uzuri and Tabitha won immunity the other seven were fair game at the bonfire ceremony. Andy was by Mable's side while Chef removed the glass. After some bonding both confessed their love and they hooked up. Yuck! How gay!"

"Quana came to see Spider; he admitted his weight paranoia and Quana sappily comforted him and told him he wasn't fat and that she still loves him. When will these teens learn that romance is bad for TV? Unless some of them have sex on camera which would be _really_ good for ratings!"

"At the bonfire ceremony the atmosphere was tense due to all that had happened throughout the day. I had only twelve marshmallows to give out; soon enough everybody besides Mable and Nakia had one. Mable because of her injury and Nakia because nobody can stand her."

"Much to Andy's sadness it was Nakia who got the final marshmallow which meant Mable was voted off. Thirteenth in the alphabet and thirteenth place … weird. After a warm goodbye Mable left the Island and left Andy more determined to defeat Tabitha and Kasimar despite Tabitha somehow being horrified at what Kasimar had done. Grow a backbone girl!"

"Who will be the next camper voted off? Is Mario better than Sonic? Will anybody else get hurt? And will Kasimar kill anyone? Find out right now on Total Drama letterz!"

(Theme song; I wanna be famous)

* * *

Andy felt depressed as her lay in his bunk. Sure; he and Mable were a couple now … but Mable had been voted off. Andy felt both Tabitha and Kasimar were to blame. Nakia was nasty too but she lacked the brain power to pull something like this off. When morning arrived Andy was going to confront Tabitha about everything. Maybe she'd feel remorse … and maybe she'd just attack him. But Andy wasn't going to let it slide this time; she and Kasimar had gone too far. It had only been a couple of hours since Mable had left the Island and Andy already missed her very much indeed. Her funky blue hair, her playful and kind attitude, her supportiveness…

"Are you ok Andy?" Asked Jimmy from the other bottom bunk. "I can't imagine what you must be going through … losing your girlfriend the day you've hooked up with her … and the injury … you have my support my friend."

"Thanks Jimmy." Said Andy with a very small smile. "But you're right; I feel sad and quite depressed. Why did she have to go? Why couldn't it have been Nakia?"

"I'm sorry Andy." Said Jimmy in shame.

"What for?" Asked Andy.

"I … I voted for Mable." Admitted Jimmy. "I did so because of her injury and I thought she'd get better at the playa … but already I regret it deeply."

Jimmy looked like he expected Andy to swear at him but Andy nodded in understanding.

"It's ok Jimmy; only one of is going to win in the end … and to be honest you probably did the right thing." Sighed Andy sadly. "I just wish she could have healed and stayed here as well."

"Cheer up Andy me heartie." Said Barney supportively. "Mable may be gone … but she's probably thinking of you at this very moment; wishing you the best of luck and loving you with all her big heart. Love always finds a way savvy? Mable's gonna be cheering you on … I know Lavender would for me as I would for her."

"You're right Barney … but I just can't get the image oh her bleeding on the sand out of my head." said Andy with a shiver.

"Keep moving forward me heartie." Said Barney supportively. "If you focus on what you've left behind you'll never see what lies ahead; treasure what is happening in life ... it's called the present for a reason yaaar!"

"Thanks Barney; I feel a little better now." Smiled Andy.

"No problem; I am an A student at philosophy." Smiled Barney. "And I bet Spider is feeling better too."

"Where is he anyway?" Asked Jimmy due to Spider's bed above him being without an occupant.

"Oh; he's spending the night with Quana." Said Andy with a chuckle. "After that whole paranoia about his weight he's going to need some love and support. He lost two whole pounds!"

"Yikes! That's not healthy." Said Jimmy sounding quite worried. "And … what about Nakia? She hates Spider … I'm not sure why though … but would sleeping in the same room as her be a good idea?"

"Not to worry cabin boy; Quana and Eleanor threw her out earlier." Explained Barney. "Yep; it must be nice to be Spider; a good cuddle with your girlfriend, yohoho!"

"Hey; I just realized." Said Jimmy suddenly. "You, Andy and Spider all have girlfriends … I'm the only one on the team without anyone. But then again I am only ten."

"I wouldn't worry about it Jimmy … love will usually come when you least expect it." Said Andy kindly. "And that means when you aren't looking for it."

"Then again…" Said Barney in thought. "Eleanor is only two years older than Jimmy … maybe Jimmy could make out with her?"

"Barney!" Blushed Jimmy in embarrassment.

"Just saying." Chuckled Barney.

"Man … it has been _quite_ a day." Said Andy wearily. "I'm gonna get some sleep. Good night guys."

"Goodnight Andy; sweet dreams … of Mable." Teased Jimmy.

"Sounds nice." Mumbled Andy as he lay his head down in his pillow to sleep.

"Final twelve though; and all four of us guys made it." Said Barney positively. "I think I have a shot a winning … but you guys do as well."

"Thanks Barney; good night." Said Jimmy sleepily.

"Same to you me heartie." Replied Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: When in Rome … become Russian.**

**Barney: Its clear Andy misses Mable … I'd feel the same if Lavender was voted off savvy? I hope me heartie recovers from the emotional blow soon … but at least Spider is going to be ok. **(Barney raises his eyebrows up and down).

**Andy: I miss you already Mable … this contest has suddenly gotten a lot less bearable. But don't worry; even if it takes a lifetime I'll make Kasimar and Tabitha pay. I just wish you were here… **(Andy sighs sadly)

**Jimmy: Me and Eleanor? Naw; I don't think that would happen. I'm too young and besides; she probably has no interest … though her eyes are pretty … crud! Edit that out!**

**Chris: No! No I will not! Haha!**

* * *

Spider was feeling much happier and at ease than he had in a few days. For one thing he now knew he wasn't fat and that he never had been. Quana had also told him she'd love him even if he was. And maybe, just maybe, the fact that he was currently in Quana's bed with Quana snuggling up to him had something to do with his good mood. Before you, yes **you**, get any ideas, both of them were in their pajama's.

"So Spider; how are you feeling?" Asked Quana with a cute smile.

"Like a million *cough* bucks." Replied Spider; though Spider was being sure to turn away whenever he needed to cough.

"Maybe you'll get a million bucks in less than two weeks." Smiled Quana as she cuddled up to Spider. "But as long as Kasimar and Nakia don't win I have no problem with whoever wins the money."

"If I win the money I'll *cough* split it with you; I *cough* promise." Said Spider honestly. "I think five hundred *cough* thousand dollars would help me get cured of *cough* a lot of my illnesses."

"And five hundred thousand dollars could help me enter the singing world … and maybe we could take ourselves and our families to Paris or something." Said Quana wistfully with hope.

"We could also bring Kasimar *cough* to court; I swear he deserves to go *cough* to jail." Said Spider. "And I really don't *cough* like how he leers at you."

"I don't like it either." Muttered Quana. "But his luck is going to run out eventually … and when it does I'm hoping he'll get some sort of humiliation that everyone in the world will see."

"Like breaking down *cough* in tears?" Asked Spider.

"Maybe." Giggled Quana which made Spider's heart flutter.

"You know; you have an *cough* adorable giggle." Said Spider which made Quana blush.

"And you have a cute way of scratching your sides when you're nervous." Flirted Quana.

Quana leaned in to kiss Spider but after just a moment of lip contact they heard a small giggle from the other side of the room. Spider and Quana parted and saw Eleanor looking at them in amusement with a smile.

"My oh my; you two look very comfy over there." Giggled Eleanor. "Forget I was here did you?"

Spider and Quana blushed in embarrassment as Eleanor stretched out tiredly.

"Sorry about that Eleanor." Mumbled Quana sounding embarrassed. "We'll behave if you want."

"It's fine guys; cuddle all you want." Shrugged Eleanor as she lay down and faced away from them. "Who would I be to stop such a happy couple from getting some alone time?"

"If you're sure." Smiled Quana as she lay back down beside Spider. ".,..It sure is peaceful without Nakia in here isn't it?"

"Yeah … I wonder where she sleeps when we throw her out." Pondered Eleanor. "I'd feel quite bad if she wasn't so mean to Spider."

"Same here Eleanor, same here." Replied Quana as she rested her head against Spider and closed her eyes. "Good night my little arachnid."

"Sleep tight my *cough* Hispanic beauty." Replied Spider as he gently stroked Quana's strawberry scented hair.

After a few minutes of silence Quana was asleep. Spider smiled at his sleeping girlfriend and turned to Eleanor.

"Yesterday I heard *sneeze* some fighting going on in *cough* here." Said Spider nervously. "What happened?"

"Nakia is what happened." Grumbled Eleanor as she took off her turtle hat and swished her blond hair a little. "She said something to Quana that was _very_ uncalled for which resulting in Quana and her fighting."

"Oh dear … what did Nakia say?" Asked Spider expecting some sort of hair relating insult … but why would that upset Quana?

"She … she called Quana a … Hispanic horse." Said Eleanor timidly. "Quana was really upset."

"… That's nasty." Frowned Spider. "What did Quana *cough* ever do to Nakia?"

Spider frowned angrily before sighing sadly.

"But its not *cough* like I can do anything about *cough* it." Said Spider in regret. "To tell you *cough* the truth … Nakia scares me a *cough* little."

"Don't worry Spider; it just takes some people longer to stand up to bullies." Comforted Eleanor. "You'll stand up to Nakia when you're ready."

"…Thank you Eleanor." Smiled Spider gratefully. "Good night; sleep well."

"Good night Spider." Replied Eleanor as she settled down and began to doze.

Spider settled himself down and gently embraced Quana while going to sleep in response Quana snuggled closer.

* * *

**Confessional: Sleep tight but not too tight or you'll find yourself unable to breath!**

**Spider: Am I a weak person ***cough* **for being unable to stand up to ***cough* **bullies? Quana says I'm not and I ***cough* **trust her … but I feel like a coward. **(Spider lets out an angsty sigh). **Well; at least having Quana close** *cough*** to me is soothing.**

**Quana: Spider has some self esteem problems. It comes from having so few friends and being kind of an outcast. Popularity is meaningless; what will it do for you in the adult world huh? Well I aim to break Spider's insecurities and make him more confident and esteemed … the first step? Getting Nakia to stop bullying him.**

**Eleanor: Dandelion has begun making a nest in the bedding area of her cage; just a few more days and the babies will be here! Eeeeeei! I wonder what I should name them. Hmmm … I'll have to think about that. Gosh; I just love cute little animals. Teehaha! **

**Chris: Maybe I should joke about ferret pie to upset her … kids crying on TV is great for ratings! Haha! Good one Chris.**

**Chef: Chris disgusts me sometimes … I wonder why I ever considered myself partners with that guy. He wouldn't last in NAAM; let alone a twilight fan girl get together.**

* * *

Lavender and Xaria lay on their beds in silence. Not only had Kasimar escaped elimination again but he had gotten Mable eliminated. It was bad enough that Mable had been a good friend of Xaria's and Lavender's best friend … but she had ended up actually _bleeding_ with a shard of _glass_ in her leg. It could have been worse … but Lavender and Xaria now hated Kasimar even more than they already did.

"This is depressing." Said Xaria to break the silence. "Another of our room mates is gone … and out of our Team its just me … you … and Kasimar left. Mable was in such pain and Kasimar actually found it _funny_ … that's just _sick_."

"I know … and Mable could have very easily been even worse off. That glass could have slither jugular vein … if that happened … No! Better not think about it." Gulped Lavender. "Well … Mable's gone now and we can't do anything about it…"

"Besides castrating and murdering Kasimar." Chuckled Xaria darkly.

"We'd be no better than him then." Said Lavender regretfully. "You know … after breaking a contestants legs, pushing another to a bear and, well, doing _that_ to Mable it's a wonder how he hasn't been disqualified yet."

"Did you read your contract all the way through?" Asked Xaria. "I admit I didn't read all of mine…"

"Me neither … I mean; I read most of it … but I was tired at the time and I _really_ needed a cup of coffee. How I regret not reading it all." Said Lavender as she clenched her fists.

"Chris can do anything he wants to us that is covered on those contracts because we sighed them ... was coming to this show a good idea in the first place?" Grumbled Xaria. "I've had a jalapeño stuffed in my mouth and been forced to be on the same team as a psychotic bully and I frequently get called bumble bee by Chris. A million couldn't even begin to compensate."

"Well it hasn't been all bad Xaria." Said Lavender with a smile. "You did become a more open and friendly person … and you met Oscar didn't you?"

"Yeah … I guess that's true." Said Xaria with the faintest of blushes before sighing. "But Oscar is now voted off and I'm still rotting on this crappy island with an equally crappy host."

* * *

**Confessional: And also crappy food.**

**Xaria: Oscar … I really miss you.**

* * *

"Well you've still got friends; never forget that." Comforted Lavender. "And its only about ten or so days until the contest ends and by that time Kasimar will have gotten his comeuppance … and I'm hoping somebody will humiliate Chris too."

* * *

**Confessional: I'm hoping so too.**

**Lavender: And if Chris ends up having his **#bleep#** cut off then I say so much the better!**

* * *

"Thanks Lavender; you're a true friend." Said Xaria as she closed her eyes; breathed in and breathed out. "I just want Kasimar to be voted off and I'll be able to rest easy. Words cannot describe how much I hate him. My parents say it isn't right to hate somebody … but I can't help but feel just that about Kasimar; he's a madman, a maniac if you will."

"It's completely fine Xaria." Assured Lavender. "After all … err … you've had experience with people who aren't so nice … so I think you are more than entitled to show a considerable amount of disdain for Kasimar. I sometimes search my brain for a positive quality Kasimar has and my search always turns up empty."

"Same with Chris I'd imagine." Said Xaria still with her eyes closed. "I'm just wondering how Kasimar manages to get away with everything with no repercussions … he's like … a karma Houdini. He keeps escaping from getting what he deserves. It's always the same; the strong oppress the weak and get away with everything because they're hot, have money or because they're intimidating … I've seen it a lot."

"Not this time though. I _swear_ that whatever it takes Kasimar is not going to win; I promise on my collection of crystals." Promised Lavender.

"Crystals?" Said Xaria without opening her eyes.

"Yeah; I collect them, you know, the gemstone type; I'm quite fond of jewelry." Explained Lavender. "My birth stone is actually a ruby; funny how its red and red is my favorite color."

"My birth stone is a topaz." Replied Xaria.

The two girls stayed silent for a minute or two.

"Good night Lavender; I'm gonna get some shut eye. Now that we've starting to get near the end of the contest the challenges are going to get even harder and more dangerous." Said Xaria as she turned over and went silent.

"Yeah … good night Xaria." Mumbled lavender as she glanced at the empty bed where Mable once slept.

* * *

**Confessional: Goodbye our dear friend … we'll avenge you!**

**Xaria: Lately my dreams are the only place I am truly peaceful … who is Kasimar going to hurt next? I don't want to get beaten up … not again.**

**Lavender: Chris is a sick twisted little man for actually finding what Kasimar does to be funny.**

**Chris: Shut up you stupid idiot! Kasimar makes for good TV while you do NOT! Haha!**

* * *

Speak of the devil and they will arrive. Kasimar was lying on his bed smoking a cigarette; he was starting to run low on them so he regretfully decided that he should smoke them less often.

Kasimar relaxed as he thought about his day; he'd upset people, dodged another elimination ceremony by winning immunity and he'd gotten somebody else eliminated. All in all a pretty good day in his twisted opinion.

Kasimar, disgustingly enough, actually found what had happened to Mable to be funny. Her whimpers and soft sobs of pain were music to his ears and he felt satisfied when he saw her walk the dock of shame on crutches. Kasimar was just plain sadistic; he _truly_ enjoyed other peoples suffering. Kasimar knew some people would hate him after seeing him no the show but he didn't really care; he just had to get eleven others eliminated and he'd be rich.

"Lets see; fourteen of us gone and twelve remaining counting myself … I've played a pretty good game so far." Said Kasimar as he took a drag of his cigarette. "Broke the faggot chef's legs, got Raven's leg broken … and Mable won't be going to a glass factory anytime soon. Heh; I wonder who I should eliminate next."

Kasimar thought on this for a moment; Lavender was probably the biggest threat … but she was fun to upset so maybe she could stay, if only for a day or two. Quana was strong but Kasimar didn't want her to go because in his opinion she had a great ass and rack. Plus he enjoyed harassing her.

Kasimar shrugged it off; he'd let Tabitha decide. While Kasimar was reasonably intelligent he preferred to do the pummeling and violent actions and leave the planning to someone else … preferably somebody he could twist the wrist off if need be.

"The only bad things that happened were that Andy and Mable hooked up … and Bug doesn't have his weight loss paranoia anymore thanks to hot ass Quana." Muttered Kasimar as he took another drag of his cigarette. "Well … I guess I can just break his legs if need be."

* * *

**Confessional: The villain speaks his mind.**

**Kasimar: Tabitha is useful for now; I admit I may have had more difficulty if not for her … but eventually I'm afraid I'll have to beat her up just like the others. They're my competition, barely, and must be treated as such.**

**Chris: Such wise words! Haha! Awesome!**

* * *

Uzuri was in bed in her hot pink pajamas with a fair bit on her mind; she was thinking about what Andy had said about Tabitha. She knew it wasn't true and she would have voted for him had Tabitha not convinced her to vote for Mable out of kindness. Uzuri thought of Tabitha as her best friend and she didn't like being told lies. What Uzuri sadly didn't know was that this was not a lie; Andy had really been telling the truth.

"Hey Tabitha?" Said Uzuri after a few moments of no sound but their breathing.

"What is it?" Asked Tabitha from her bed.

"Andy talked to me today … he said that … well … you were using me." Said Uzuri hesitantly. "Why would he tell me that? I know you're not like what he said … so why would he?"

Tabitha, as always, was quick with a response, obviously an untrue response.

"Well Uzuri … I'd say that Andy wanted you on his side in an attempt to make more of an impact at the Bonfire Ceremonies so whoever he wants gone would be gone. And perhaps he wanted to take advantage of you." Lied Tabitha in an intentionally thoughtful voice.

"He did?" Said Uzuri sounding both hurt and angry. "But … he seemed genuinely concerned when Mable was hurt … and he seems to really _love_ her as I do with Vinnie. And after what Kasimar did…"

Tabitha felt a great twinge of true guilt in her heart; she did know what Kasimar was capable of and she did order him to hurt Mable … but when Mable ended up actually bleeding with glass stuck in her leg … it was horrifying. Tabitha rarely felt guilt as her parents taught her that it represents weakness … but this time Tabitha felt a little shame.

"Well Uzuri … there's no doubt he has feelings for her; lot's of people have found love in this competition … maybe … maybe he just really doesn't like you." Lied Tabitha as she lay back down on her bed. "Nobody likes everyone; I have some people I dislike but Andy lying to you like that wasn't a very nice thing to do."

"Yeah; well, I'll settle it with him at the bonfire ceremony." Said Uzuri tiredly. "Right now I just want to go to sleep and have a nice, sweet nightmare. Good night Tabitha."

"Err … good night." Replied Tabitha uncertainly as Uzuri lay down to sleep.

* * *

**Confessional: How can a nightmare be sweet? It isn't sugary! LOL!**

**Tabitha: **(She looks confused). **How can anyone enjoy a nightmare? I've had a fair number of them … they are anything but sweet! Boy; Uzuri puts the freak in freak show; did she get dropped on her head as a baby or something?**

**Uzuri: I love horror movies; they're so intriguing and soothing … but there is **_**one**_** movie I _seriously_ don't like. Human Centipede; urgh! Whoever thought **_**that**_** disgusting mess up is just plain crazy and needs professional help!**

* * *

A short while later Uzuri was sleeping soundly and Tabitha was getting ready to go to bed; this had been a fairly hard day and a nice relaxing rest would be good for her. As she settled down under her bed sheets there was a knock at the door. Tabitha looked up and saw Nakia standing outside wearing ruby red pajamas and glittery red slippers. Tabitha grumbled as she got out of bed and let her brainless and prejudice alliance member into the cabin.

"Let me guess; Quana and Eleanor kicked you out again huh?" Said Tabitha as she closed the door to prevent the cold outside air getting in.

"Yeah! How dare they; what's their problem?" Whined Nakia. "And to make matters worse Quana wanted to snuggle with that ugly bastard of a boyfriend she has!"

"Nothing wrong with wanting some special time with your lover." Mumbled Tabitha as she got back into bed to get cozy. "It's beyond me why you hate Spider so much … by any chance did you insult him or your room mates?"

"I just called Spider a walking bad haired stillbirth that his parents should be ashamed of." Pouted Nakia. "Its not an insult if it's the truth."

* * *

**Confessional: Actually that just makes it insensitive.**

**Tabitha: Wow … just wow. Nakia is about as bright as a broken light bulb dipped in the toilet.**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair). **I'm so pretty aren't I?**

* * *

"Look … just forget about your hair obsession for a while, ok?" Said Tabitha wearily. "Its going to get you booted off this island; you seem to be good at really getting people upset."

"And I'm super smart." Boasted Nakia.

"Trust me Nakia … if not for me and my alliance you'd have been voted off instead of Oscar." Said Tabitha flatly. "Anyway; its getting late and I want to get some sleep before the next challenge. After today's events I'm feeling like I want to sleep for a whole twenty four hours."

"Fine." Shrugged Nakia as she climbed into the bed above Tabitha. "But its no big deal; Mable was a threat and besides; with such an ugly hairdo like she had she bought her fate upon herself really."

While Nakia settled down Tabitha lay in her bed and thought to herself.

"_Nakia thinks Mable deserved __**that**__ because of her __**hair**_?" Thought Tabitha in disgust. "_She's as delusional as Buzz Lightyear was … she is very quickly wearing out her welcome and my patience_."

* * *

**Confessional: Thankfully Nakia can't discriminate against me because as an outhouse I don't actually have hair.**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair and singing). _Everybody loves me, everybody loves me, Spider's a rat, spider's a rat, and my hair is so silky_!

**Tabitha: I regret to say that I need Nakia; I can have her vote with me and if I betray her she might reveal me to the others. I guess I'll make the best of a bad situation like I have done before.**

* * *

The next morning the final twelve campers were awake and eating 'breakfast' in the mess hall; a good night of sleep had been refreshing but some campers still felt gloomy about the events of the previous day. But any way they looked at it the answer was always the same; Mable was gone and they would have to continue without her. For something was easy but for some (mainly Andy, Lavender and Xaria) this was a hard thing to do.

"I miss Mable." Mumbled Andy as he ate a piece of some unidentifiable food that had 'quarantine' written all over it in a metaphorical sense but because of his depression he didn't taste anything.

"Me too; she was my best friend along with Xaria." Said Lavender as she sat at Andy's table next to Barney.

"Cheer up me hearties." Encouraged Barney in an attempt to be helpful. "You'll see her again; the Playa has excellent medical treatment; you should know Andy."

"I guess you are right Barney; like you said last night, keep moving forward." Agreed Andy as he rested his elbows on the table and his head in his hands.

"At least we've got each other right savvy?" Said Barney in a cheery tone as he hugged Lavender; Lavender leaned into Barney's embrace and Andy couldn't help but smile for them.

* * *

**Confessional: And you've got me too! How lucky can you get huh?**

**Andy: It makes me smile to see Barney and Lavender so happy together … looks like they'll get something good out of the show whether they win or lose. I wish I could hug Mable … once I get my chance I'm going to seriously have a word with Tabitha … she's such a ****可怕的母狗****!**

**Barney: I'm not only an expert at love but I'm a master at hugging as well!**

**Lavender: Well … Mable may be gone sadly … but I've still got Barney by my side. He's a whole lot smarter than he lets on you know.**

* * *

Spider and Quana were sitting together eating breakfast; well, they had been but had stopped after the first spoonful due to the horrible taste. Currently they were simply talking to each other.

"So; did you sleep well Spider?" Asked Quana sweetly.

"Better than I have in *cough* the past few days." Admitted Spider. "With Nakia back I fear for my personal safety."

"Don't worry; I'll protect you." Said Quana as she glanced over at Nakia brushing her hair at a different table. "And I really think that she lacks the brain power to do anything more complex than dress herself in the morning."

"I know … but … it's *cough* just that she seems to really *sneeze* hate me when I've done nothing *cough* to her." Said Spider. "And being hated for little to *cough* no reason is a very nasty *cough* feeling."

"Don't listen to her Spider; she's just a little person with a _**LOT**_ of growing up to do." Said Quana comfortingly.

"I guess so … but *cough* she really wants to make me suffer; and *cough* for what … my hair." Said Spider in disbelief. "I can't help that its *cough* untamable … and its about what a person *sneeze* is like inside; like that movie Shallow Hal … and *cough* the longer I stay here the *cough* more determined she will be to make me *cough* suffer."

Quana saw her boyfriend was looking upset and gave him a comforting hug.

"It's the circle of life and it moves us all; through despair and hope, through faith and love … make of that what you will." Said Quana soothingly.

"…Thanks Quana." Said Spider as he gave his girlfriend a peck on the cheek to which she giggled.

"That's what I'm here for." Said Quana kindly as she glanced at her food. "You know … I think I'm going to skip breakfast today."

"Me too." Agreed Spider. "I thought Chef's food was getting better but lately its been getting worse; maybe he's angry about something?"

* * *

**Confessional: From the day we arrive on the planet … and blinking, step into the sun.**

**Spider: One of these days I'm going ***cough* **to learn how to stand up for ***cough* **myself. But it's easier said than ***sneeze*** done.**

**Quana: I never expected to fall in love on this show … but I guess none of us can see the future right? This show has been an overall great experience … and you know … I think I really have a shot at winning. But if any of my friends win I'll be just as happy as well.**

**Chef: I can't cook good food because Chris skimped even more on the food budget recently for more hair gel! Man that man has problems!**

**Chris: Shut up baldy!**

* * *

Tabitha was leaning against a tree outside camp thinking to herself. She had come pretty far in the game, just like she thought she would. Only eleven more days and she would win the competition. While she had been mostly indifferent to what she had done she couldn't help but feel bad about what happened to Mable and disgusted with herself for allying with Kasimar.

Everything she had done had been purely strategic and nothing personal; other people in different reality shows had done worse. And Tabitha herself had never laid even a finger on any of the others. So why did she feel regret? Her parents wouldn't be impressed if they knew she felt regret; not at all.

"Just eleven more people to beat and I'll win." Said Tabitha while pushing out the feeling of guilt. "Uzuri is gonna have to go sooner or later … and Andy might be a problem. I guess I can decide based on who wins immunity and who doesn't."

Tabitha heard foot steps and put on a casual face; she turned and saw Andy walking up to her with a murderous expression on his face. Tabitha gulped as Andy stopped about a meter away from her.

"Hey Andy." Said Tabitha in an attempt to be casual.

"Cut the crap Tabitha; you've gone too far this time." Growled Andy. "I'm not sure if you realize it but that little stunt you pulled on Mable could have _killed_ her."

"But Andy." Began Tabitha but Andy held up a hand to silence her.

"I never would have expected even somebody like _you_ would go that far." Continued Andy bravely. "Is seriously hurting somebody worth a million dollars? What kind of parents raised you? Don't you know right from wrong?"

"Andy; it wasn't me!" Said Tabitha truthfully.

"You promise Mable would be hurt if I told anyone; I didn't expect you to fine out … but maybe you are indirectly responsible and told Kasimar to do it hmm?" Shot Andy. "Give me one, just _one_, good reason why I shouldn't just tell everybody what a nasty person you are and have you booted off this Island before you can say mars bar!"

Tabitha thought for a moment; maybe she could tell Andy the truth … maybe he would understand her plight. But then things would probably get even worse after the show. Tabitha's mind automatically made her decide on a tactic she had employed on people before.

"Because … if you tell anyone I'll make Mable homeless." Growled Tabitha.

"…What?" Said Andy blankly.

"My family is very wealthy Andy; and it has many powerful lawyers. I could easily have Mable's family thrown on the streets … of course; I won't do anything at all _if_ you keep your mouth shut." Threatened Tabitha.

"…I guess I have no choice." Said Andy quietly before looking at Tabitha is hatred. "But I ask you this Tabitha … how long will it last? You may be seen as nice and thoughtful now … but sooner or later the truth is going to come out. What goes around comes around."

Andy turned and walked away but turned his head and said one last thing.

"And do you think your despicable actions are going to win you any friends? If I was your friend I'd be ashamed at myself." Said Andy as he walked away from Tabitha. "Show some remorse."

After Andy was gone Tabitha was left alone; after a few moments she let out a sigh.

"Karma doesn't exist; bad people never get their comeuppance." Mumbled Tabitha bitterly. "…I know from experience."

* * *

**Confessional: Enemy defeated! Five hundred experience points awarded!**

**Tabitha: Andy has no idea… look; I didn't mean for that to happen to Mable, really I didn't. But the truth is the world is an unfair place and good people always suffer; this island is no exception. All of us are going to lose besides just one of us anyway; it's how reality shows work.**

**Andy: Back to square one; on one hand I can give Tabitha what she deserves but Mable will become homeless … on the other hand I can stay silent, Mable is happy and Tabitha might win … option two sounds better. Man; how do such bad people get onto reality shows anyway?**

**Chris: Because they make for good TV; man you're such an idiotic idiot you stupid idiot! Haha!**

* * *

Barney had finished breakfast; well, he'd eaten what he could anyway as quite frankly is tasted like monkey crap. He was currently relaxing on the beach thinking about the competition so far and the great friends he had made during his time on Wawanakwa Island.

"_Jimmy; the guys a really nice kid and I bet my hat that someday he'll make a girl very happy indeed yaaaar. I think him and Eleanor would go good together … but maybe that's just me. Kasimar had better leave him alone or he'll walk the plank into _hell."

"_Spider; he's a really nice guy who needs to be given a chance yaaar; Nakia should be ashamed of herself. Maybe if I shaved her hair it would humble her a bit. I'm proud to be the starting force of Spider and Quana's relationship. Both have a good shot at winning in my opinion_."

"_Eleanor; she's so sweet, I wouldn't be surprised if she went all the way … provided Kasimar doesn't mess with her yaaar. Her ferrets are adorable; I always did like small animals though I also have a soft spot for koi._"

"_Lavender; whoa. She's beautiful and smart … not only that but she can easily stand up to bullies and she's a goods leader. Me and her in the final two would be epic yaaar_."

"Thinking about something Barney?" Asked Lavender as she walked up and sat down beside Barney.

"A few things Lavender me love." Said Barney as he sat up. "This, that, those … and you of course."

"Thinking about me?" Asked Lavender slyly.

"Not like that!" Said Barney quickly with embarrassment.

"I'm just teasing you." Smirked Lavender. "It's completely fair after you used reverse psychology to get me and Quana to kiss on a dare."

"You know you liked it." Said Barney with a genki grin and wiggling his eyebrows.

"You're so eccentric." Sighed Lavender before smiling. "And that's another reason I love you."

"True; I'm pretty darn irresistible yaaar!" Smirked Barney playfully.

"If you say so." Said Lavender to humor her boyfriend. "So … what do you want to do before the challenge?"

"How about we just watch the waves?" Suggested Barney.

"Sounds like a good idea." Smiled Lavender as she snuggled against Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: Wave to the crowd!**

**Lavender: Ever since I met Barney I've grown a liking for pirates. **(Lavender giggles).

**Barney: Lavender gives cheerleaders a very good name; not like the ones you see in those American movies yaaar. I love this show me hearties!**

* * *

As the campers went about their activities before the challenge of the day started the intercom crackled into life with an insidious screech. After the screech vanished a single second later Chris began to speak through it.

"Attention remaining twelve losers who are but mere footstools to somebody as great as me." Said Chris arrogantly. "Its that time of day again; that's right, it's time for your eighteenth challenge! And this one might actually be fun. After all; I'm going to make some _big bucks_ from it! Haha! Everybody report to the amphitheatre for more details."

Chris stopped speaking but the twelve campers waited expectantly for his usual intercom screw up and sure enough it arrived very quickly.

"Gosh; these pink thongs are itchy but so dang comfortable … wait, is it on? Oh f-." Said Chris as he switched the intercom off in humiliation while all the campers laughed at the host's stupidity.

* * *

**Confessional: Thonginator forty thousand! … That sounds like something Doofenshmirtz would probably say.**

**Barney: Yohohohohohoho! Snrrrk! Chris really has no common sense right me hearties? Snrrrk! **(Barney continues laughing).

**Lavender: **(Quiet mumbling). **So I'm not the only one. **(Normal voice). **Maybe Chris should let Chef do the announcements to save himself from further embarrassment. What an idiot!**

**Jimmy: I thought thongs were just for girls … on this show I learn something everyday. Chris really seems to common sense doesn't he? Heheehee! **

**Spider: Chris's mishaps always put ***cough*** a smile on my face. **(Spider laughs).

**Quana: Hahahahahahaha! Chris wears ladies underwear? He'll never live that down!**

**Tabitha: **(She rolls her eyes). **Ok; I admit that I did find that a little amusing.**

**Xaria: Snrrrrk! Sucks to be Chris!**

**Eleanor: **(She is laughing in hysterics). **Now that was **_**funny**_**!**

**Chris: No fair! The intercom isn't working right! I demand that be edited out or I'll castrate every single one of you!**

**Chef: Heheh! Chris wears thongs!**

* * *

A few minutes of laughing later the twelve campers were seating on the bleachers by the amphitheatre. Spider and Quana were sitting next to each other holding hands as were Barney and Lavender. Uzuri sat next to Tabitha while Tabitha thought to herself. Kasimar was sitting alone at nobody liked him in the slightest bit. The others were sitting with their friends. After a minute or two of waiting for Chris, the sadistic bully of a host arrived and stood on the stage in front of the remaining campers.

"Ok campers; today's challenge is-." Began Chris but he was interrupted.

"How long have you been wearing thongs?" Called out Uzuri with a giggle.

"Are they comfortable yaaar?" Asked barney with a laugh.

"Shut up right now; I command you!" Roared Chris.

"Chris invented something a few days ago." Said Quana. "It was the Thonginator! Hahahahaha!"

"Shut up right now or the next person to insult me is walking the dock of shame!" threatened Chris. "Do not go to bonfire ceremony, do not collect marshmallow and do not win a million dollars! So shut the #bleep# up!"

Everybody quieted down and became silent which made Chris smirk.

"Much better; you guys really lack a backbone! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

The campers frowned while Chris continued speaking.

"Ok; for today's challenge you are all going to be …

…

…

…

Cosplaying! But not as cats, nope … you are going to be cosplaying as video game characters!"

"Alright!" Cheered Jimmy. "Back home the guys and I love playing wii. This challenge could be fun."

"PS3 isn't better than Xbox and Wii is for little girls!" Grunted Kasimar. "But hopefully I'll get a violent character."

"The rules are quite simple; you will all pick a piece of paper out of a hat. You will then cosplay as the character written on the paper and be given a costume like what they wear to change into. After that you will put on an act of your character in a random order Chef will choose."

"So how do we win?" Asked Eleanor.

"Simple; whoever puts on an act that is faithful to the character that they are cosplaying or if your act impresses em then you are going to score big points. Hopefully none of you have stage fright … but if you do it's not my problem! Haha!" Laughed Chris meanly.

"So how many people can win immunity? Six? Four? Two? Maybe just one?" Asked Lavender.

"I'm getting to that." Said Chris airily. "The top four performances will be immune from the Bonfire ceremony tonight and will automatically get into the final eleven as could logically be expected. As always the first placed camper will receive a special prize. The eight who don't win immunity are fair game at tonight's vote off so, I don't know, you might want to win immunity."

"Where will we be getting changed?" Asked Andy. "In our cabins?"

"Nope; that would take too long for me to bare." Said Chris casually. "We have set up changing rooms next to the mess hall last night; one for each gender. No going into another genders changing room for a thrill as good for ratings as that would be … ok?"

"Dammit." Muttered Kasimar.

"Ok then; those are pretty much the entirety of the rules." Said Chris as he whipped out a hat from nowhere. "So everybody come and pick a character. Oh; and you can't change the character you pick so no swapping with anyone, got it?"

* * *

**Confessional: I'd Cosplay as the Dressing Room!**

**Spider: I wonder who I'll** *cough*** get. Knowing my usual luck** *cough*** it'll be somebody I know nothing** *cough*** about.**

**Uzuri: This is great! I've never Cosplayed before but I have gone as a zombie cat to the schools costume part before; so this might not be such a bad challenge.**

**Lavender: While this challenge sounds fun I have to wonder how Chris isn't going to have to pay to use the characters.**

**Chris: Isn't it so obvious you brainless idiot? Product placement duh! Total Drama letterz is a HUGE hit!**

* * *

The campers lined up and Chris readied the hat for them to pick out a character to cosplay as. First in line was Barney; he reached in and took out a piece of paper. He whooped in delight when he saw who he was cosplaying as.

"Who did you get Barney?" Asked Lavender who was behind Barney.

"I got Admiral Razorbeard!" Said Barney with a smirk. "This challenge is going to be easy considering my love of pirates!"

"Well let's hope I get a good character." Said Lavender as she reached into the hat and pulled out a piece of paper and read the name on it. "Tom Nook? Isn't he the shop keeper on animal crossing who is a complete greedy cheapskate?"

"That's him." Chuckled Chris.

As Lavender sat on the bleachers trying to think on how to put on a believable performance Jimmy reached into the hat and pulled out a piece of paper and looked satisfied.

"Cool; I got Ripto!" Smiled Jimmy.

"Who's that?" Asked Tabitha.

"The main villain of Spyro 2." Explained Jimmy. "He has anger management problems."

* * *

**Confessional: You wouldn't like me when I'm angry! Roar!**

**Jimmy: Not bad; I've completed Spyro 2 so I kinda know how Ripto acts … though I would have preferred to be spyro. Oh well; I'll just have to make do with the Riptoc.**

**Barney: Razorbeard; my favorite gaming villain … its as if this challenge was custom made for me. Yaaaar! This is gonna be fun! Yo ho!**

* * *

Andy reached into the hat and took out a piece of paper and shrugged.

"Hmm; looks like I'm Sonic." Said Andy sounding generally ok with his character. "Robotnik would have been better though."

"Isn't he called Eggman?" Asked Eleanor.

"No; his real name is Dr. Ivo Robotnik." Explained Andy.

"I wonder who I'll get." Said Eleanor as she reached into the hat and took out a piece of paper. "Hmm … looks like I'm going to be Pikachu … but he can't say anything other than is name."

"Not my problem." Shrugged Chris.

"Yeah; not outta my way!" Growled Kasimar as she shoved Eleanor to the side and onto the ground.

"Ow." Groaned Eleanor as she rubbed her sides.

"Need a hand?" Asked Jimmy as he extended his right hand to help Eleanor up.

"Thanks Jimmy." Smiled Eleanor. "I wonder who Kasimar is going to get; I hope it'll be somebody he'll have trouble portraying."

"Oh you gotta be #bleep' kidding me!" Snarled Kasimar. "There is NO #bleep'# way I'm doing this!"

"Sorry Kasimar; you either Cosplay or walk the dock of shame; the choice is yours." Smirked Chris.

Kasimar snarled as he walked away from Chris. On the way Barney stuck out his foot and Kasimar tripped over and dropped the paper which Uzuri caught. Uzuri looked at and began laughing.

"Teeheeheeheehee!" Laughed Uzuri. "Guess who Kasimar is Cosplaying!"

"You had _better_ not tell anyone." Snarled Kasimar.

"…He's Cosplaying as Princess Peach!" Laughed Uzuri and soon just about everyone else was laughing too.

Kasimar snarled darkly.

* * *

**Confessional: Hahahahahahaha! Sucks to be Kasimar!**

**Kasimar: That little **_**bitch**_**; I oughta sew her eyes shut and throw her to the piranha's!**

* * *

A few minutes later when everyone had quieted down Xaria reached into that hat and looked at who she had picked out.

"Guess I'm going to be Wesker then." Said Xaria. "Good thing I've seen the Resident Evil game's on the internet."

"Wesker became a monster and got two rocket propelled grenades to the face. Serves him right!" Pouted Uzuri in memory of the ending of Resident Evil 5.

Next to reach in was Nakia; she reached in and took out a piece of paper and looked revolted.

"_Seriously_? You actually have the nerve to make me Cosplay flippin Waluigi?" Growled Nakia. "He's, like, so annoying! He's the character in Mario Party that _nobody_ wants to play as!"

"While I completely agree with your statement." Said Quana with a smirk. "You and him have a symbolic relationship in that you are both _really_ annoying."

"Take that back right _**now**_ you Hispanic Horse!" Screamed Nakia.

It took the combined strength of Barney, Lavender, Spider and Andy to hold Quana back from killing Quana.

"Hmm; touchy." Sniffed Nakia smugly as she took a seat on the bleachers.

"That little brat." Growled Quana taking deep breaths. "When I get my hands on her…"

"Please calm down *cough* Quana." Said Spider as he gently stroked Quana's hair to calm her down. "You said it yourself; she's not *cough* worth it. You're a million and one times the *sneeze* girl she could ever hope to be."

Quana looked Spider in the eyes and smiled.

"Thank you Spider." Smiled Quana as the others let go of her. "I just get _really_ angry when she calls me that."

"I don't blame *cough* you cutie." Replied Spider.

"Dammit!" Grunted Chris in disappointment. "I wanted to see a catfight!"

* * *

**Confessional: Meow!**

**Quana: Nakia is just pathetic and annoying … I really don't think she's going to amount to much in life … is it wrong for me to think that? I can only surpress my anger for so long. **(Quana puts her head in her hands). **Why oh why did she have to return?**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair).** Straightforwardly people like Quana are footstools for people like me. She should get that through her thick skull if she wants to end up anywhere in life besides a fast food joint.**

* * *

Spider reached into the hat and looked relieved at the character he was going to cosplay.

"Cool; I'm going to *cough* be Professor Layton." Smiled Spider. "And I've *cough* completed all the games in that *sneeze* series."

"I've got a puzzle for you and you'll never figure it out!" Laughed Chris. "Which of these is heavier; a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?"

"They obviously weight *cough* the same." Replied Spider.

"…I hate you." Growled Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Even I knew that one.**

**Spider: I've heard that puzzle** *cough*** before; its simple when you think ***sneeze*** about it properly.**

**Nakia: How could that uneducated nerdy slob know that? Ok; so I didn't know … but my point remains; I rule and Spider drools! So, like, there!**

* * *

Uzuri picked out a piece of paper and smiled at who she was to Cosplay.

"Yay! I'm Dingodile; good thing I have a flawless Australian accent." Said Uzuri sunnily. "And I'll get to use a flamethrower though it'll probably be fake … oh well! Teehee!"

Tabitha rolled her eyes which nobody else noticed and she reached into the hat to pick out her character; she took out on of the last pieces of paper and looked at who she would be cosplaying for the challenge.

"Ok; I guess this could work." Said Tabitha. "I'm going to be Clank … I guess I'll just have to use a lot of techno babble words and make some smart one liners."

This left only Quana; she reached into the hat and took out the final piece of paper; she opened it up and looked at the name of the character on it.

"Not bad; I'm going to be Mario … this might not be such a bad challenge." Smiled Quana. "Though I don't really think overalls are really me."

"Too bad; you're going to wear them or instantly get booted of the show." Smirked Chris. "Ok; now everyone can go to their respective gender's changing rooms. The interns will hand you your outfits."

* * *

**Confessional: The interns deserve more respect!**

**Random Intern: Chris sucks! He didn't let me take the day off when my wife went into labour! What an asshole!**

**Chris: Shut up!**

**Lavender: This won't be such a bad challenge; no risk of getting hurt and Kasimar's going to be in drag and will get a dose of humiliation … I have a good feeling about today!**

* * *

Chris looked at the campers as they left to get changed and turned to the cameraman.

"Looks like some campers are happy with who they will be cosplaying … and others are just plain pissed off! Who will win immunity? Who will be voted off? And will anybody actually do a good job at cosplaying? Or will they just humiliate themselves more than they already have? Find out after the break on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Well; this looks like an interesting and funny challenge huh? And Kasimar is getting some humiliation on international television; but its not like he doesn't deserve it.

Coming up in the next chapter is the cosplaying acts, all round hilarity and another vote off. It's going to be both interesting and humorous.

Here's a cheat sheet as to who the campers are cosplaying as in case you've forgotten already.

Andy: Sonic the Hedgehog

Barney: Admiral Razorbeard

Eleanor: Pikachu

Jimmy: Ripto

Kasimar: Princess Peach

Lavender: Tom Nook

Nakia: Waluigi

Quana: Mario

Spider: Professor Layton

Tabitha: Clank

Uzuri: Dingodile

Xaria: Albert Wesker


	39. Day 18, Part 2, Operation Impersonation

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his awesome story total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would be quite grateful if you didn't steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains Cosplay, blackmail, crying, possible accidental nightmare fuel, a bad Australian accent and a bully in a pink dress. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor** AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **I'm back; sorry for the wait everyone but I do have valid reasons. Firstly I have become a big fan of the Survivor fan Characters series on deviantart by SWSU Master and it took time to read the comics. Secondly I have been working on a level in LittleBigPlanet 2 for a contest in hopes of winning a prize crown. Lastly I have downloaded the Legend of Zelda the Ocarina of Time for the Wii and it is absolutely AMAZING! I would whole heartedly recommend it to anyone.

Those are my reason; you may commence throwing bricks at me as long as you give me a chance to defend myself with a riot shield. So … with all that out the way it is time for another exciting drop dead cool chapter of Total Drama Letterz!

Press any key … where's the 'any key'.

* * *

"Welcome back to episode eighteen of Total Drama Letterz." Waved Chris to the camera while flashing a less than charming smile. "If you are just joining us the final twelve campers are going to be Cosplaying as famous video game characters that we got permission to use thanks to sucking up and a little bit of product placement."

"Some campers were happy with who they were cosplaying; such as Barney as Admiral Razorbeard … other were, quite frankly, poised off … namely Kasimar as he has to cosplay as Princess Peach. It's quite obvious that this challenge is going be full of cheap laughs and drama at the camper's expense … so let's get ready to laugh at their misfortunes! Haha!"

"This challenge seems unusually tame considering your sadistic attitude." Said Chef while standing with the intern behind the camera.

"Shut up! It's easy because I'm getting a lot of money from it!" Snapped Chris.

"Will I finally get a raise?" Asked Chef hopefully.

"Nope! Haha!" laughed Chris snidely.

A rock was thrown at Chris's head and he wailed in pain.

* * *

**Confessional: Rock and roll! This challenge is gonna rock more than a boulder! I'm so funny; I tell the best jokes in the whole world! LOL!**

**Chris: **(He is crying like a baby). **Waaaaaaah! Chef is such a meanie to me! Boo hoo!**

**Chef: **(He looks amused). **I hate to see Chris cry … but not as much as I hate to see him happy! Harharhaaar!**

* * *

The seven girls were in their changing room preparing to change into their outfits. Nakia was less than pleased that she was expected to dress up as Waluigi of all characters … but if she wanted to stay in the contest then she had no choice whatsoever.

"This is, like, so unfair!" Whined Nakia. "Why couldn't I be Princess Peach?"

"Because Kasimar picked her … unintentionally of course." Said Eleanor with a chuckle as she put on a yellow and brown striped T-shit that was colored like Pikachu.

"It's still unfair." Pouted Nakia.

Tabitha hadn't started to get changed yet; for reasons she would never _ever_ tell anyone she refused to get changed in front of other people no matter who they were. Quana noticed Tabitha standing around doing nothing.

"Hey Tabitha; why aren't you getting changed?" Asked Quana as she took her shirt off to put on the red shirt Mario wore. "Aren't you going to participate?"

"It's not that." Began Tabitha with actual unease. "But … I have a thing about getting changed in front of other people … it makes me feel uncomfortable."

"But we're all girls in here … and I don't think Kasimar is going to be trying to attempt a peep show when he'll be in a pink dress." Chuckled Quana.

"I know; but I just REALLY don't like changing with other people in the vicinity." Mumbled Tabitha quietly.

"That's no problem." Said Xaria in understanding as she slipped on some black trousers. "You can probably use one of the toilet stalls like Lavender is doing."

"Why is she?" Asked Tabitha curiously.

"Because of the type of panties she's wearing I think." Piped up Uzuri.

"Ok; I see." Said Tabitha as she turned to approach a toilet stall. "I'll be changed within a minute or two."

Tabitha walked to one of the toilet stalls but just before she got there she slipped over on a wet patch of water on the ground. She managed to stop her fall with her hands but her purple shirt has slightly gone up at the back … revealing a scar.

"Hey Tabitha; if you don't mind me asking." Began Xaria. "How did you get that scar on your back?"

Tabitha paled and quickly got up; she then turned around so nobody could see the scar.

"Oh, that … I got it a gardening accident at my families mansion." Lied Tabitha; this time for a very good reason.

"Did it hurt?" Asked Uzuri in concern.

"… Very much." Said Tabitha as she entered a toilet stall, closed the door and locked it.

* * *

**Confessional: Simba versus Scar.**

**Tabitha: I had to lie about how I got it … but there is absolutely **_**no**_** way I'm telling the real reason.** (Tabitha sighs in fear and thinks to herself).

**Uzuri: Was Tabitha bullied when she was younger? That's so sad!**

* * *

"Do you think her scar is why Tabitha doesn't like getting changed in front of others?" Asked Uzuri out loud after a moment of silence. "Or is she just generally uncomfortable about it?"

"Could be a bit of both." Said Lavender as she exited a different stall than the one Tabitha had entered.

Lavender was no longer in her cheerleader outfit and was instead wearing cloths in a Tanooki pattern as well at raccoon ears, a belt with a tanooki tail and a blue apron with the Tom Nook shop logo on it.

"I feel ridiculous." Grumbled Lavender.

"If you think you look bad take a look at Uzuri." Giggled Xaria.

Uzuri was wearing a crocodile mouth mask, a large pair of baggy sandy colored trousers and a belt with an obviously fake yet large crocodile tail attached. And added to this she was wearing a back mounted flamethrower that was hopefully fake.

"Struth Sheila's; I'm gonna roast up some toast in the billabong beyond the outback mates; all in the name of Cortex! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri while putting on an exaggerated and _very_ bad Australian accent.

"Well I'll give you an E for effort." Said Quana in amusement.

* * *

**Confessional: What's a billabong? Is it a sort of drum?**

**Eleanor: **(She just shakes her head and giggles).

**Xaria: **(She is wearing mostly black with a leather jacket and some dark sunglasses). **I'm probably going to regret saying this … but I feel almost sexy. I guess it's all in the cloths huh?**

**Uzuri: See; what did I tell you? Flawless Australian accent! Teehee!**

* * *

"I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do." Said Eleanor as she clipped on a belt with a Pikachu tail attached to it. "I can't say any funny stuff because Pikachu can't say anything besides his name … or her name; I can't remember what gender it is."

"I'm not sure how the games become so popular." Muttered Nakia. "Almost all the Pokémon are bald as a bomb and those that do have hair look freaky!"

"They just happened to be hits with the crowd." Shrugged Quana. "I loved watching the anime when I was younger."

"I never liked anime; it's so weird and the mouths don't match what the characters say!" Whined Nakia.

"It's called dubbing." Said Xaria in a deadpan voice. "Look it up."

"Anime is cool." Smiled Eleanor. "I absolutely _loved_ watching Hamtaro when I was little; it was the highlight of television."

"Phfft; like, wrong!" Said Nakia. "Beauty and fashion shows are the best!"

"We all have different tastes." Said Lavender. "It's just life; everyone is different."

"Are we talking about TV?" Asked Tabitha as she exited the toilet stall dressed as Clank; the outfit was silvery chrome and very shiny; she also had a hat with an antennae. "I don't watch it that much; I'm too busy. Though I was quite fond of Blinky Bill when I was a kid."

* * *

**Confessional: Don't even blink! I saw you Bill!**

**Tabitha: A slightly embarrassing secret yes … but if I actively get involved in the conversation then they will trust me more. Andy's already onto me but none of the girls are … none besides Nakia and not only is she on my side but truthfully, and I'm sure you'll agree, she's even dumber than Ralph Wiggum.**

**Nakia:** (she is _still_ brushing her hair).** It is scientifically proven that one plus one equals eleven; that's why eleven is made up of two ones … duh! I'm so smart.**

* * *

"Have any of you six been to a Cosplaying convention before?" Asked Tabitha casually as she put her normal cloths in a neat and folded pile on one of the changing room benches.

"Can't say that I have." Replied Lavender.

"Me neither." Said Xaria as she put her hands in her pockets.

"I've been to animal conventions before while dressed up." Said Eleanor. "But I've never exactly cosplayed as anything."

"Same here but replace animal with monster." Said Uzuri while sitting down and staring into space.

"Cosplaying is for nerds!" Gagged Nakia. "I hate nerds; they're so uncool, ugly, fat, and thin and they smell like old people! Gross!"

"Put a cork in it Nakia." Frowned Quana. "Everybody is different; and what's so bad about being a nerd? Spider's a little nerdy but he's anything but hateable, he's so _wonderful_."

Quana put her hands together and smiled dreamily at the last part which made most of the others 'aww' while Nakia just scowled.

"I'll let you know when I start to care." Said Nakia as she took out her hair brush.

* * *

**Confessional: Probably never.**

**Quana: Nakia is annoying … but enough about her. I'm going to enjoy this challenge; acting like Mario shouldn't be too hard. After all; he's so famous that practically everyone in the world knows who he is. And I bet spider will look cute in a top hat. **(Quana giggles girlishly).

**Tabitha: Boy am I glad my outfit wasn't revealing … I don't feel comfortable showing off excessive amounts of skin with other people watching me. Still; I don't think it will matter if I win immunity or not; nobody dislikes me … but I'm going to put a lot of effort in just in case.**

**Lavender: I feel like a clown except without the comically oversized shoes … and what notable quirks does Tom nook really have? I've barely even played animal crossing!**

**Eleanor: I don't really think this is so bad … it's a lot better than being strapped in a torture chair or hunting a crocodile right? I'd rather forget those challenges…**

**Xaria: **(She is smirking). **I wonder what Kasimar looks like in a dress; this is gonna be just what he deserves.**

* * *

The five remaining guys were changing into their costumes; some of them looked quite ridiculous indeed. No prizes for guessing who looked the most absurd.

Barney had changed into a white and blue striped vest with red and white striped pirate pants. He also sported a peg leg he had slipped his real leg into as immunity wasn't worth amputation. He wore a large violet pirate hat with the skull and crossbones on it. To finish his costume he wore a mouth mask shaped like a beard made of a steel razor.

Jimmy was wearing a white shirt and purple hot pants. He also had a purple cape that looked like what Dracula or indeed any other none twilight vampire would wear. He was wearing a horn on his head which was attached to a transparent headband. He also had a gold and red medallion around his neck and held a scepter in his right hand.

Andy was wearing a blue shirt and blue pants to match the blueness of sonic. Yet he also wore a wig with a lock of spines that went midway down his back. On his feet his usual shoes were replaced with red and white sneakers.

Spider looked stylish and as though he had come straight out of old age London. He wore a tidy orange shirt and black jacket. He also wore black pants and green shoes with beige under soles. Perhaps most noticeable was the large top hat he was wearing; it was tall and proud looking with a red stripe going around the base of the circumference.

Currently the four Team Puzzle males were laughing; and it was with good reason because standing a distance away. Clenching his fists and gnashing his teeth with an ugly snarl was Kasimar.

Kasimar looked as unmanly as it was possible to be. He was wearing (against his will) a long bright pink dress with a dark pink ruffled collar, a dark pink hem and short puffed sleeves. He also wore (once again against his will) long white opera gloves, a sapphire pendant, and an obviously fake golden crown with fake plastic jewels in it. He looked not only ridiculous but also very feminine and stupid.

"If any of you laugh I'll hacksaw off your fingers." Threatened Kasimar with a quiet and dark snarl.

"Well … pink really is your colour savvy?" Chuckled Barney. "You look like a princess aright … a princess with a split monobrow and the face of a whales butt! Yohohohohoho!"

"Shut up!" Screamed Kasimar in fury.

"Now, now." Said Jimmy while waggling his finger. "That's no way for a Barbie girl to act."

"Shut it!" Screamed Kasimar in even louder fury.

"I wonder if *cough* those are implants." Chuckled Spider.

"SHUT THE #BLEEP# HELL UP!" Roared Kasimar as he ran at Spider and uppercut him to the floor with a completely _murderous_ expression on his face.

Spider rubbed the part of his chest Kasimar had punched and looked up at the bully; funnily enough he still looked intimidating even when in a pink frilly dress.

"Hey! Back off scum bag!" Said Barney as he got between Spider and Kasimar while glaring at the latter.

"What? He provoked me!" Argued Kasimar. "I was just defending myself!"

"After all you've done to Spider including giving him a peg leggedly bad weight complex that could have hurt him as well as sexually harassing his girlfriend I think a few insults are in order eh pinky yaaar?" Retorted Barney with a smirk.

"He's got a point there." Agreed Andy.

"Shut up!" Snarled Kasimar at Andy and Barney before looking at Andy. "Boy; it's a wonder you have a girlfriend, didn't the atomic bomb hurt you huh?"

Andy gasped and looked like anger was building up inside him. Everyone else was very shocked by Kasimar's seriously tactless comment.

* * *

**Confessional: The tactless tit.**

**Kasimar: Meh; it's all good. He insulted me so I insulted him … oh, wait a second … I think that Andy was actually the only one who didn't insult me. Oh whatever; I couldn't let an insult opportunity like that pass me by. Death to the civilians!**

**Andy: **(He is clenching his fists in anger). **Does Kasimar even know the horrors of the atomic bomb? That is **_**seriously NOT**_ **funny.**

**Jimmy: Andy looked really angry … and Kasimar looked scary. I wanted to get out of there but for some reason I just didn't feel like I could leave…**

**Spider: Dude; ***cough* _**not**_** funny**

* * *

"Kasimar; that is *cough* not something to joke about. Thousands of *cough* completely innocent civilians died." Said Spider disapprovingly. "Even the atomic bomb's *cough* creator was said to have been thinking *cough* 'my God, what have I done'."

"Whatever; it's not like anybody important got hurt right? And it must have been funny to watch people get fried like an egg from within the planes! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he turned and headed for the door. "Next time don't piss me off!"

Andy charged at Kasimar but Kasimar slammed the door shut and Andy smacked into it. Andy groaned as he rubbed his head.

"I hate him so much." Said Andy darkly with a tone of loathing.

"Don't we all me heartie." Said Barney as he helped Andy to his feet.

"Well; at least he's going to get laughed at." Said Jimmy to cheer up his friends. "Though Kasimar in a dress _does_ look a little bit scary.

"I'm wish I could throw things at him." Said Barney in determination. "Preferably tomatoes; as they make a good solid splat."

"Wouldn't that just anger him?" Said Jimmy nervously. "I don't really want Kasimar to go berserk; he might really hurt somebody like he's done before … we can't let it happen again."

Barney took off his pirate hat in respect to Gary, Raven and Mabel; all three of which had been eliminated and seriously injured due to Kasimar's twisted and nefarious actions.

"Evil … a four letter word that opposes life." Said Barney philosophically. "Well … you look really cool in those costumes guys!"

"Way to change the subject … but thanks; hopefully I can pull off a good impersonation of Sonic." Said Andy in hope. "But I doubt Nakia will win immunity; so if Kasimar does win immunity yet again none of us will be in danger of losing."

"She's really frivolous." Added Jimmy. "She was pretty mean to me back in the snooker challenge; all because of my hair."

* * *

**Confessional: I'm bald.**

**Jimmy: I like my hair the way it is thank you very much.**

* * *

"Welcome to my world *cough* little buddy." Said Spider glumly. "A world where torment happens *cough* daily and the bathroom breaks are *cough* nonexistent."

"Your tragic sense of humour is another reason Quana likes you I bet." Smiled Andy. "So … when the show ends and she inevitably comes to visit you … where would you take her for a first date?"

"Hmm … I haven't actually *cough* thought about that." Admitted Spider. "Maybe a Chinese restaurant?"

"Or the carnival; that way you can win her a comically oversized teddy." Said Jimmy helpfully.

"Or you could just watch a movie yaaar." Suggested Barney. "My favorite is pirates of the Caribbean."

"That doesn't surprise me in the least." Chuckled Andy. "I'd say take her to the moon … well; if it were possible I'd do that with Mable … but as usual reality holds me back like a seatbelt."

"Don't diss the seat belt me heartie." Said Barney wisely. "It could save you if a drunken guy hits you on the road."

"It was a metaphor." Explained Andy. "Well; we may as well go and get laughed at … though something tells me that I'll enjoy this challenge."

"I think we'll all enjoy Kasimar in a bright pink dress! Yohohohohoho!" Laughed Barney with a slap of his knee. "I bet he'll lose a lot of his credibility as a bad guy."

"You mean like how Wallace *cough* did when he helped the old lady *cough* across the street in the fear challenge?" Asked Spider with a chuckle.

"Exactly." Said Barney as he rubbed his hands together and cackled. "This is gonna be _awesome_!"

* * *

**Confessional: There is no price for awesomeness … or attractiveness.**

**Spider: It's wrong to laugh at ***cough*** other people's misfortunes … but Kasimar isn't exactly what I ***cough* **deem a normal person to be. I'd say he's bought ***cough* **this upon himself.**

**Jimmy: I. Hate. Dragons! Gaaaah! So … was that anything like Ripto? I want to stay in character!**

**Kasimar: A good drag before the humiliation was good … but I don't wear dresses! Fags and girls wear dresses, not me! Well; maybe Chris can give me a free pass again? I stir up the drama which gets him a big paycheck. Due to his greed I think he'll want to keep me around for at least a while longer.**

**Barney: **(He is holding a juicy bright red tomato). **What? I wasn't lying when I said I was going to throw a tomato at Kasimar yaaaar.**

* * *

The twelve campers had gotten dressed into their Cosplay costumes and were seated around the amphitheatre. Some of the campers didn't look so bad in their costumes such as Xaria … but others, like Kasimar, looked completely ridiculous. But when you're a scowling bully in drag this is to be expected.

Chris walked onto the stage and looked over the campers and burst out laughing at them.

"Haha! Oh man! You guys look ridiculous!" Laughed Chris as he wiped away a tear of laughter. "Kasimar in a dress, Nakia with a big fake nose and Lavender with a tanooki tail! Haha!"

"Look who's talking; you're wearing your Halloween costume already." Smirked Lavender which made a few of the other campers laughed at Chris.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "I don't like your attitude!"

"I don't like your face." Replied Lavender coolly.

Chris's eye twitched in anger as steam almost literally came out of his ears.

* * *

**Confessional: Steam punk and cake.**

**Chris: **(He is flailing his arms about and having a temper tantrum). **I hate her I hate her I hate her! Waaaaah!**

**Barney: I don't know why but I have a sudden urge to kick Chris in the kiwis for some reason.**

* * *

"Whatever! Shut up!" Snapped Chris. "If you're done being a bully its time for the challenge to begin. As I said before; you will be Cosplaying as your assigned video game character. The top four acts will be immune and the other seven have a chance at being voted off. I am going to be judging your acts … but I won't tell you how well you did until everyone has finished performing."

Chris got off the stage and sat down at a judges table in front of the stage and took out a hat in front of him.

"I am going to decide the order you perform by picking coins out of the hat; as before they have your face on them." Said Chris. "Your hideously ugly faces … but faces all the same. Haha!"

The campers scowled at Chris as he reached into the hat and took out the first coin. It had Xaria's face on it.

"Looks like Xaria's going to be going first." Said Chris as he held the coin up for the campers to see.

"No complaints there." Shrugged Xaria.

"But you're a complainer!" Said Chris in surprise. "You're a little bitch who is supposed to whine like an asshole!"

"The only asshole I see is you." Replied Xaria coldly. "And it just so happens there is a resident evil character called Chris … and as I hate you … this might not be too hard."

* * *

**Confessional: The names Redfield … Chris Redfield.**

**Chris: Why did nobody tell me there was a character called Chris in the resident evil series? I don't want Xaria to win! No fair! Grrrr!**

**Chef: Has Chris ever even read the instruction booklet for Resident Evil?**

**Xaria: As Wesker hates Chris … I think I can stay in character quite well. **(Xaria smirks).

* * *

Xaria stepped on the stage and adjusted her sunglasses; she looked at the audience and began to pace while speaking in a cold, cruel and almost controlling type of voice.

"The human race requires _judgment_. Every day humans are bringing themselves one step closer to self destruction. I'm not destroying the world … I'm _saving_ it." Said Xaria as an impersonation of Albert Wesker.

"Natural selection leaves the survivors stronger and _better_; the human race has escaped this winnowing for _far_ too long."

"I should have killed you years ago Chris." Said Xaria in a voice with a slight hint of insanity. "This volcano will be your cremation spot! Time … to _die _Chris."

Chris looked a little scared at how much Xaria was getting into her role whilst the other campers looked at Xaria seeming impressed. Kasimar looked indifferent as he gazed as the clouds whilst Nakia brushed her hair. Uzuri had taken out a bag of popcorn and was eating it as though this was an expensive top live rated show at a theatre.

"Over you say? I'm _just_ getting started! Uroborus will cleanse the world!" Said Xaria as she finished her cosplay impersonation and lowered her sunglasses a little.

Most of the audience applauded and Xaria took a bow.

"Well Chris; that good enough for you?" Asked Xaria as she crossed her arms in satisfaction.

"Well … you certainly got into character … but you said you wanted to kill me! That's insane!" Complained Chris.

"It's exactly what Wesker says in the games." Replied Xaria as she got off the stage and sat back down in the bleachers.

"Good job Xaria." Congratulated Lavender. "You were really in character up there."

"Thanks; and I have to say that this outfit makes me look kinda masculine." Chuckled Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: Masculine, muscular and metropolis; three M words!**

**Xaria: I don't think Chris knew that there is a character called Chris in Resident Evil. He really didn't do the research huh? I am not sure how well this challenge was thought through.**

**Chris: I hate that bumble bee! I oughta pull off her wings like I did to butterflies when I was a kid! Grrrrrrrr!**

**Eleanor: I sense a disturbance relating to butterfly treatment.**

* * *

"Ok; the nest person to go on the stage and humiliate themselves is going to be … haha! Kasimar!" Laughed Chris as he took out a coin with Kasimar's face on it.

Kasimar snarled as all eyes turned to him and laughter began. He just crossed his arms and growled at the others.

"What's it going to be Kasimar? Humiliate yourself for a million? Or walk the dock of shame?" Asked Chris craftily to aggravate Kasimar.

"I thought I was your favorite." Said Kasimar in a deadly whisper as he arose.

"I can't play favorites." Shrugged Chris.

"You've been doing that for Kasimar all competition!" Frowned Lavender.

"Oh shut up ditz!" Snapped Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Ditz and oven mitz.**

**Lavender: You know; it's as if Chris is trying to make us nothing more than the stereotypes we are labeled as for the competition; and I'm the strategic cheerleader! That means I'm no ditz!**

* * *

"Ok; time to throw the tomato yaaar." Smirked Barney as he took out the ref fruit.

"Hang on; after that crack that dickhead made about the atomic bomb I want to throw it." Objected Andy.

"But I'm the one who stole it from the kitchen." Reasoned Barney.

"But he made an offensive insult to my culture; about something that jokes shouldn't be made about." Negotiated Andy.

"This is getting us nowhere; let's decide by rock paper scissors." Suggested Barney.

"Ooooo no my friend. According to various YouTube comments, people who know each other and are friends will likely tie every nine times out of ten in a game of rock paper scissors due to the limited number of outcomes." Explained Andy somewhat troll logically. "I propose a game of rock paper scissors lizard Spock."

"… *cough* what?" Said Spider in confusion from his seat behind them. Barney looked puzzled as well.

"Don't worry; it's very simple." Assured Andy. "Scissors cut paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitate lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock … and as it always had been and always will be … rock crushes scissors."

Spider looked a little confused by this and silently shook his head while Barney nodded.

"Ok; I think I understand that." Said Barney. "Let's do this."

"Rock paper scissors lizard Spock!" Said Barney and Andy; Andy did lizard and Barney did paper.

"Fine; I give you the honor of tossing the tomato my friend." Said Barney as he passed Andy the tomato.

* * *

**Confessional: So … does Lizard beat Spock or not? I can't remember.**

**Andy: I'm surprised that worked … but it's completely fair. I learned about that from the internet; it's amazing what you can find on the World Wide Web.**

* * *

Kasimar got onto the stage and everyone began laughing at him; Chris was laughing too. Kasimar snarled in rage as he swallowed his pride; surely a little bit of humiliation was worth a million dollars right?

"Mario! Help me Mario! Mario help me!" Said Kasimar begrudgingly in a forced high pitched voice. "Rescue me from Bowser! He's … scaring me."

Everyone burst into even bigger amounts of laughter at Kasimar while the blue mohawked bully snarled in loathing of everyone laughing at him.

"Keep going Kasimar!" Called Chris. "You're not done yet."

"… I went for a swim … and I splashed my tights." Said Kasimar through gritted teeth. "Toadsworth; get me my make up! I want to feel … pretty."

Chris gave Kasimar the thumbs up which signified that he was done. A tomato then splattered onto his face; Kasimar walked off the stage in complete humiliation while clenching his fists.

"I've got to say; you look good in a dress Kasimar!" Giggled Uzuri in mirth.

"He's really tickled pink!" Added Lavender with equal laughter.

Kasimar took his seat and scowled at the others; if he didn't win immunity he'd yank Chris's eyeballs out with a hook, no doubt about it.

* * *

**Confessional: Kasimar in drag! It's like a drag race!**

**Kasimar: **(He looks furious and murderous).** I've never wanted to murder a group of people as much as I do right now. **

**Uzuri: Teeheeheeheehee! Kasimar looked so funny! He also looked more ridiculous than people who dress as food for a living. Teehee! That was really funny!**

**Nakia: No fair! I wanted to be Princess Peach! I could pull her off way better than Kasimar ever could! Kasimar didn't look like a princess; he looked like a boy in a dress!**

**Quana: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! Pink just isn't Kasimar's color! Hahahahaha!**

**Spider: On one hand I want to ***cough*** laugh at Kasimar's humiliation … but ***sneeze* **on the other hand I'm worried that he'll hear me ***cough* **and thus will hurt me.**

**Tabitha: I've got to admit; that was pretty funny. I hope its good enough for Kasimar to win immunity because I need his vote to get rid of who I want gone … but he certainly did deserve that. And yet, I probably deserve even worse...**

* * *

"Ok then; time for another person to get on that stage and get laughed at." Said Chris as he reached into the hat and took out a coin with Jimmy's face on it. "Ok Jimmy' you're up. Indulge me in your talent … I'm not expecting much."

"I bet he can do much better than you ever could fifteen fold." Said Eleanor from her seat.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: But don't you pull something down to make it hut?**

**Jimmy: Chris surprised me with his negativity and cold heart … so it's fair turnaround that I surprise him with my acting skills.**

**Eleanor: I don't like Chris … but I think it's quite justifiable considering how sadistic he is.**

* * *

Jimmy stood on the stage dressed exactly as Ripto, horn and all. The audience waited for him to start as Chris gave him the signal to begin his act.

"Aaaaaaarrrrgh! Gulp you _imbecile_! You ate my scepter!" Said Jimmy in a completely different voice that sounded like a vocalized snarl and an irritable temper mixed with words. "Now how am I going to kill Spyro? I want to kill that dragon because I … hate … dragons! Gaaaaargh!

"Meh." Said Kasimar from the bleachers. "Mediocre performance."

"What? You _again_? Pinky … you are _really_ starting to get on my _nerves_!" Bellowed Jimmy in the same irritable voice. "Gulp … lunchtime! Finish him off and you can have all the fairies you can eat … I'm going to _enjoy_ this. And after I destroy you all with my new scepter I'm renaming this place Riptonia! Gwuhahahahahaha!"

Jimmy held up the prop scepter which glinted in the sunlight and struck a pose. The audience cheered fore him besides Nakia and Kasimar, the gruesome twosome. Chris clapped just a single time.

"Well … it wasn't bad … or at least not as bad as I was expecting." Shrugged Chris. "But … good job I suppose. I doubt you'll get dead last."

"Thanks Chris … I think." Said Jimmy uncertainly as he got off the stage due to not being sure if Chris was insulting him or not.

* * *

**Confessional: If I had a country I would call it Confessional Land. The sky would be purple! You gotta have purple sky.**

**Jimmy: I think that went well … better than it did for Kasimar anyway! Heheehee! **

**Eleanor: Wow; Jimmy's a really good actor, he really sounded like Ripto up there.**

**Tabitha: Would it kill Chris to be even a little positive? I'm guessing his doctor says it would. Even I admit Jimmy did pretty well.**

* * *

"Ok; the fourth person to go on stage and degrade themselves is … Barney." Said Chris as he held up a coin with Barney's genki face on it. "Since he is Cosplaying a pirate and he's already a pirate … this might not suck as much as it otherwise would.

Barney got to his feet and ran up to the stage; it was hard to tell if he was grinning or not as the razor beard he was wearing obscured his mouth from anybody's vision. Barney straightened out his hat as Chris cued him to start.

"Who dares disturb _**me**_?" Said Barney in an irritable and almost screamy voice. "What? He has two of the four masks? You incompetent _imbecile_! Gah! Send out the warships and _destroy_ him! Bring that limbless freak back to me dead … or alive! And while I'm at it I'm going to eat a yellow lum so that rayman cannot repair the heart of the world and this he must find a spare lum in the tomb of the ancients! What are _you_ looking at you idiotic fool? You've failed me again … I warned you didn't I? Let's see how well you swim in _**MOLTEN**_ lava!"

Barney had narrowed his eyes so that combined with his beard mask it looked like he was snarling while in fact he was actually smiling.

"Meanwhile I'll just handle this little _problem_ myself even though I'll inevitably get my robotic rear kicked like every bad guy … yaaaar!" Finished Barney as he held up a not so intimidating fist.

"Go Barney!" Cheered Spider as he clapped. "I really *cough* recognized Razorbeard there. I've seen *cough* the cut scenes in non gibberish on *cough* YouTube."

Most of the crowd clapped and as it died down Chris spoke a few words.

"Not bad; I just hope it wasn't me you were planning on throwing into lava." Frowned Chris.

"If I like you I'm not." Replied Barney with a smirk.

"That's alright then." Said Chris obliviously thinking Barney liked him. "Good job, you may rejoin the audience."

* * *

**Confessional: Ask the audience; that's one of your life lines.**

**Lavender: I think it's a safe bet that Barney is safe for at least one more day, and I'm obviously fine with that.**

**Tabitha: Sometimes I wonder what Barney is thinking … maybe he's onto me … or maybe he's planning something sinister.**

**Barney: Did you ever wonder if it's possible to make a glass that can't be either half empty or half full? … Didn't think so.**

* * *

"Ok; the fifth camper who we are going to laugh at is …

…

…

Tabitha. Let's see her unleash her inner nerd because we all know Clank is a nerd without the glasses! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

"At least nerds are smart which is far more than I can say for you." Replied Tabitha icily as she got up onto the stage.

Chris blinked and snarled at the rich girl on the stage.

* * *

**Confessional: It's evil vs. wicked; Tabitha's bad and Chris is SICK.**

**Chris: That girl is such a bitch! But … she really brings in ratings so I'll tolerate her mouthyness for now.**

**Lavender: Chris really can't take criticism can he?**

**Tabitha: I guess if I want to Cosplay Clank decently I'll just have to talk like Hector does. And maybe make up some scientific mumbo jumbo as well.**

* * *

"Hmm; Ratchet, it looks like the hyper space work drive on the ship is broken. I suggest that we discombobulate the bibulants and sifaluxitate the quantum warpism chain powered bobble matical lasinator. And while we're at it we should stop at galaxy burger and order a Cragmite Blasterinator type of weapon."

"Do you understand anything she's saying?" Whispered Jimmy to Quana.

"Not one tiny bit of it." Replied Quana.

"Hey Ratchet; remember that time we were on Planet Tabora and we found the logic puzzle? Break glass to get rock to break glass to get wrench? But then the other container said break glass to get wrench to break glass to get rock to break glass to get wrench. But before I could solve the puzzle you cheated and used your current wrench to get the new wrench. Such is the life of the pint sized sidekick."

Tabitha took a bow and the audience applauded her; Kasimar and Nakia refrained from doing so as it would have aroused a lot of suspicion. Tabitha got off the stage and Chris had a facial expression that simply said 'meh'.

"Not bad … but I could hardly understand anything you said. Nerd! Haha!" Laughed Chris. Tabitha just rolled her eyes and sat back down.

"You know." Said Jimmy suddenly. "I don't know why … but the phrase 'Cragmite Blaster' means something to me … but I just can't put my finger on what it is."

"I have that exact *cough* same feeling." Agreed Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I think that breaks the fourth wall into a fair few pieces.**

**Tabitha: That wasn't such a bad cosplay on my part … immunity isn't important to me this time since I have a total of four votes on my side … but if Kasimar and Nakia don't get immunity its pretty given that one of them is outta here; no way will Uzuri vote for anyone else.**

**Xaria: Ok … I don't think even Stephen Hawking could have understood even half of those words Tabitha was saying.**

* * *

"Not bad; but there is a fully possible chance that none of those five acts will get immunity." Said Chris as he took a coin out of the hat with Spider's face on it. "And now it's time for some another complete loser to make a complete fool of themselves … and Spider dweeb that's you! Haha!"

Spider shrugged off Chris's insult as he adjusted his top hat so it was straight; he made his way onto the stage to begin his performance.

"Boo! Boo!" Jeered Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm not scared at all.**

**Nakia: My goal is that if I can't win I'll make sure Spider can't win either; that little worm is an embarrassment to be around; a filthy smear no our successful society in fact.**

**Xaria: Am I the only one who has absolutely no idea whatsoever why Nakia hates Spider so much?**

* * *

Spider stood on the stage looking very neat and tidy in his Layton get up. He cleared his throat and began his act.

"What's that Luke? Flora has *cough* brain cancer? …That reminds me of a *cough* puzzle! One wolf says he can run twice *sneeze* as fast as the second wolf, the second wolf *cough* says he can twice as fast as the *cough* first. Which wolf runs faster? And while you *gag* ponder on the answer for a handful of *cough* picarats I shall drink some refined tea as *sneeze* it is the only way to be a true *cough* gentleman."

"It has occurred to me that *cough* I have the best theme song of any *cough* Nintendo DS character. It's especially good in the *cough* orchestral version. So … have you figured out the *cough* puzzle? The answer is infinity for you would *cough* have to keep doubling each wolf's speed to match *cough* what they claim their speed is. And while we're at it a *cough* true gentleman never leaves another gentleman *cough* behind. Even if *cough* the gentleman in peril is surrounded *cough* by obsessive Twilight fan girls."

"I shall see you all *cough* in archeology class; it's time for my next *cough* cup of tea." Said Spider as he struck the same pose Professor Layton does when he completes a puzzle.

The crowd cheered for Spider; well, most of the crowd did but Nakia typically booed and Kasimar just scowled.

"You go Spider!" Cheered Quana from her seat.

"A true gentleman like Layton himself!" Added Eleanor.

"Bah humbug! What's so good about that vermin?" Scoffed Nakia. "He's just so stupid!"

"You know what else is stupid?" Asked Uzuri.

"No; what?" Asked Nakia rudely.

"You are! Teehee!" Laughed Uzuri as she clapped for Spider.

Nakia blinked and scowled in anger at the blond haired sweetie next to her.

"Well Spider; I don't know if you've done enough for immunity … but you accurately portrayed Layton." Said Chris reluctulently as being nice wasn't his cup of tea. "Either way; I guess you did sorta alright."

Spider rejoined the crowd and as he sat next to Quana he couldn't help but notice Nakia glaring at him with _**pure**_ loathing and hatred. Spider gulped silently as he relaxed while Quana put her arm around him. Spider smiled and tried not to look at Nakia's glare of hatred.

* * *

**Confessional: A matter of 'loath' and death! LOL!**

**Nakia: While I seriously want Spider out of the competition, in a body bag if at all possible, it might be hard to get rid of him … but there's another person who might be a little easier to get rid of that I also greatly dislike…**

**Quana: Spider did really well; I should probably play the Professor Layton games sometimes. I wonder if I can pull off Mario as good as Spider did Layton?**

**Spider: I enjoyed that; maybe I ***cough* **could go to a Cosplay convention sometime. I'd ***cough* **be professor Layton … and **_**maybe**_** Quana could be a cat girl. **(Spider chuckles to himself).

**Kasimar: I'd love to beat the life out of Bug … but after the whole 'Mable incident' I might have to lie low in terms of fighting for at least a little while. It'll be worth winning though. On a related note … I'm pissed off!**

* * *

"Next up to board the Humiliation Express is … Lavender." Said Chris with a sudden sadistic smirk. "This ought to be good; nobody likes Tom Nook … and the same can be said about Lavender! Haha!"

A rock was thrown at Chris's head and he wailed in pain; he turned around but couldn't figure out who threw it.

* * *

**Confessional: Rock and roll like a boulder!**

**Barney: You mess with Lavender and you mess with me. Chris should know that by now.**

**Chris: **(He is crying like a baby who has only just been born).

* * *

Lavender stood on stage in her Tanooki shop keeper get up; she felt as ridiculous as an emo clown. Lavender sighed and began her act.

"Welcome to Nook's Cranny Mr. or Mrs. Player character. Feel free to browse but try not to carouse. Hoho. And remember; once you've finished working for me I'll force you into the Happy Room Academy or HRA so that I can play off you insecurities of criticism and thus you will buy more stuff and Ill become rich. If you don't I'll send the raccoon goons after you. Do you understand me Mr. or Mrs. Player character?"

"Keep hold of those raffle tickets so that at the end of the month you can have a very low chance of getting up to three rare items! But I need not worry; your determination and greed will make you come crawling back to me each and every time. Hoho!

"And when you make me filthy rich I will close my store for the day and remodeled it while laughing at the inconvenience I have caused you! But you won't mind because you'll have a better chance at getting that cabin dresser you've been wanting. It's still a low chance but it's all good! Hoho."

"So stop by Nook's Cranny and let me rip you off; Tom Nook is a crook; if you buy from me then you'll get took. Hoho." Finished Lavender while inwardly feeling extremely embarrassed; this would give Kasimar more reason to hassle her … but then again _**he**_ was the one in a pink dress.

The audience began clapping, cheering and laughing good naturedly at Lavender's somewhat deadpan and snarky portrayal of Tom Nook. It also seemed to have a little bit of accidental nightmare fuel but that didn't really bother anyone.

"Ok; that was amusing." Said Chris in a critical voice with all the grace of a fish. "But Tom Nook isn't really like that in the games."

"Look online Chris; everyone thinks he's like that." Replied Lavender as she sat back down in the audience.

"Ok; I think I will!" Retorted Chris whilst hoping to be able to prove Lavender wrong.

* * *

**Confessional: Tom Nook the mob boss of the Tanooki Mafia. Straight from Chicago!**

**Chris: **(He is looking at something on a laptop and blinks in surprise). **Whoa; she was right after all. Hmm; Tom Nook really isn't well liked by the fandom it seems. Who would have thought?**

**Lavender: I have a feeling I've one upped Chris.**

**Spider: I don't know why but** *cough*** thinking about what Lavender said too ***sneeze*** hard gives me the heebie jeebies.**

* * *

"So; not only did Lavender humiliate herself on international television but also made me aware that Tom Nook is thought to run a mafia." Said Chris while somehow keeping a relatively calm tone. "But quickly moving no from that … I think its time for another person to do some Cosplay. And that person will be … Eleanor!"

Chris held up a coin with Eleanor's smiling face on it and Eleanor groaned as she knew acting like Pikachu would be very embarrassing indeed. Eleanor got up from her place on the bleachers and walked over to the stage, her electric volt shaped belt tail swishing a little as she walked.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm out of ideas and so is Eleanor.**

**Eleanor: Ok; does anybody have a suggestion how I put on a Decent Cosplay as Pikachu when all he or she can say is his or her name? Why am I asking a camera? It's not like anyone can respond to me as I speak. Oh well; I guess I'll just try my best because really that's all anyone can ask from anyone.**

* * *

Eleanor got on the stage and thought what she should do as she walked to center stage; she quickly decided to just wing it. Chris cued her to start and Eleanor began to act like Pikachu.

"Pika piiika! Pika … Pikachuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!" Said Eleanor in an attempt to act like Pikachu when it did the thunderbolt attack that always sent Team Rocket 'blasting off again'. "Piiiikaaaa!"

Eleanor dropped to all fours and attempted to scratch behind her ears with her foot; she felt very embarrassed just like Lavender had been and maybe even more so.

"Pika piiika!" Chirped Eleanor in a way that resembled her ferrets to some degree."

"Yahahahaha! Man that girl is such a retard!" Laughed Kasimar from the audience. "She must have brain damage to put on an act like this! Yahahaha!"

A pebble hit Kasimar full force on the head.

"OW! Who did that?" Barked Kasimar angrily.

Nobody noticed Jimmy adjusting his hat.

* * *

**Confessional: Rock paper rock!**

**Jimmy: You'd be surprised just how much stuff I can fit under my hat; it's that roomy.**

* * *

"Ok; I think we can stop the act right there." Said Chris with an amused look on his face. "Eleanor … what the _**hell**_ was that?"

"It was my cosplay act." Replied Eleanor while trying not to look at Kasimar who was sneering at her.

"You call it an act … I call it crap; definitely the worst so far! Haha!" Laughed Chris snidely.

"Well it's kind of hard to Cosplay a character who can't say anything besides their own name you know!" Said Eleanor in an attempt to be brave.

"Whatever; you girl are talentless and an all round retarded sk- OW!" Wailed Chris as another pebble was thrown at his head with a fair bit of force. "Stop doing that you meanies! Boohoo!"

* * *

**Confessional: Kick the dog … or ferret lover as the case may be.**

**Chris: **(He is crying both pitifully and pathetically).

**Jimmy: Never underestimate the power of rock … the rock I threw, not the music genre.**

**Eleanor: I saw Jimmy throw that rock; that was really nice of him to stand up for me like that. This Island has more bullies than just Kasimar.**

**Spider: I think I know what Chris was ***cough* **going to call Eleanor. That was ***cough* **completely unprovoked. Just how much does** *cough*** his contract allow him to get away ***sneeze*** with?**

**Uzuri: Chris is such a **(thing that is too scary for us to put in this show legally). **And that goes double the power of triple for his hair!**

**Andy: It's official; Chris is a self absorbed bully of an asshole.**

**Kasimar: Chris is funny; I'd let him in my gang if he were my age and also if he wasn't such a wimp.**

* * *

Chris soon stopped crying and after demanding that particular footage be cut from the episode he quickly resumed the challenge.

"Ok then; eight of you have done the challenge and have given us some good laughs … but we still have four more of you to degrade and humiliate. So let's get right to it! Haha!" Laughed Chris as he reached into the hat and took out a coin with Uzuri's face on it. "Looks like Uzuri is the ninth person to perform their Cosplay. Let's see how good she can imitate Dingodile; she has a little bit in common with him already being that she's a complete freak of nature! Haha!"

"Go choke on your own blood Chris." Frowned Uzuri as he got up and approached the stage.

"You tell him Uzuri." Agreed Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: Hack! I'm choking on a pencil!**

**Uzuri: I don't like Chris; he's quite, for lack of a better term, a prejudiced meanie! He's got such a big head it might inflate so much that it'll explode one of these days.**

**Tabitha: I could have gone without that mental image. **(Tabitha shudders).

**Andy: I wish I could convince Uzuri that Tabitha is using her … but I know she won't believe me … what can I do? Before long it's going to be too late. Think Andy **_**THINK**_**!**

* * *

Uzuri was on stage and was eager to do well with her act. She saw Chris dully cue her to begin and she started her cosplay imitation.

"G'day mates; Dingodile's the name. Struth; it's a hot day out and it's about to get even hotter in the billabong outback because I'm gonna make some toast with my flamethrower! Bring out the butter mates!" Said Uzuri in a _really_ bad Australian accent.

"You little ripper Crash; I'm gonna roast you and bury you down under in the down under! Gwuhaha! What's that you say? Why do I hate you? Mind your own bizzo mate! I oughta take your ashes beyond the black stump and leave them be eaten by the blowies! Bonzer"

"I oughta roast you and then go for a drink in a billabong boozer! Enough talk mate; we're down under for a reason and that reason is to make some bandicoot toast! G'day and g'night! Struth!"

The audience was silent for a moment before cheering. Uzuri took a bow and smiled modestly.

"Boo! Boooooo!" Jeered and sneered Kasimar and Nakia for they both greatly disliked the short blond oddball.

"Ok … that was flat out #bleep# crap." Said Chris with quite a lot of rudeness. "I don't know how much you know about Australia but the locals do _not_ speak like that! Seriously; billabong, what the hell is that?"

"If you must know it's an oxbow lake cutoff by a change in the watercourse." Replied Uzuri promptly. "And Chris … you're pathetic in that you have nothing better to do than upset people; you don't bother me anymore you sad strange little man … and you have my pity."

Uzuri got off the stage and sat down next to Tabitha while a few of the audience applauded her while Chris looked stunned.

"I hate you." Growled Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: You've got to stand up to bullies and show them you aren't scared of them. Wise words indeed.**

**Chris: Darn it! There goes my amusement; well, picking on Uzuri was fun while it lasted.**

**Uzuri: It feels very satisfying to stand up to Chris; he's such a horrid **_**wicked**_** man. I bet he doesn't even feel guilty about what he said to me when everyone but me got a present from home.**

**Nakia: Uzuri's tears would have amused me … but you can't have everything I suppose.**

**Andy: To be honest; I thought that Uzuri's cosplay act was really good. Chris probably just said that to spite her due to his dislike of her. That man should get serious help.**

* * *

"Well; moving no from that abysmal performance its time for the tenth cosplay act." Said Chris as he reached into the hat and took out a coin with Andy's face on it. "Andy; you're up. Try not to flat out suck ok? I want some acts to actually be at least semi decent."

"I guess I'll try." Shrugged Andy as he approached the stage in his Sonic the hedgehog outfit. "Though seriously; a blue hedgehog? Hedgehogs are brown! But then again Manic is green so it's not the worst case."

"Who?" Said Chris blankly.

* * *

**Confessional: Sonic Underground stupid.**

**Andy: The sonic series is ok … but it's been going downhill lately; I prefer Pikmin and Star fox. Still; I liked Bean .. .you know; the green duck with the bombs … from sonic the fighters, remember?**

**Quana: Andy has a point; why is sonic blue? Was orange not good enough? But then they'd have had to make Tails a different color as well … I guess it equals out in the end.**

* * *

"Faster than the speed of sound! That's me!" Said Andy in his best sonic sounding voice he could muster. "Dude! I'm gonna go so fast that you'll be a snail in compassion! Woo! Time to beat Dr. Robotnik and his latest stupid invention. The Pathetic Mobile, the Flame Crapper, the Egg Viper or the Filthy Hairy Egg Scissors. Whatever it is I'm fast enough to win … and for some reason it almost always takes eight hits to make it go kaboom!"

"I don't know why but my quills never damage chairs or beds … but they can shred through Robotnik's badnik's like a hot knife through melted butter! On a completely unrelated but speedy note my 2006 video game was abysmal; everyone knows Sonic Adventure was my best adventure. Let's kick that big talking egg's butt!"

"Catch you later keeds because I'm going the speeds! I also happen to be so fast that I can play the minute waltz in seven seconds! Faster than the speed of sound I am! Yes!"

Andy did a spin with a thumbs up and at that moment it was clear his act had finished. The audience applauded besides … guess who. Chris shrugged indifferently at the cosplay act Andy had performed and gave a brief critic.

"While you kept Sonic in character with retardation which may or may not have been on purpose … you got eggman's name wrong! It's Eggman stupid!" Scoffed Chris.

"Chris; his name is Dr. Ivo Robotnik; look it up!" Said Andy coolly.

"It's Eggman because I say so!" Retorted Chris.

"Actually Chris; his name really is Dr. Robotnik yaaar." Said Barney with patience. "I go by the classics and Robotnik was his name in all of them. In fact; he was even called Robotnik in the cartoon series ya plunder blunder."

"Which one?" Asked Lavender. "Sonic X?"

"Actually the AoStH series m'lady." Replied Barney.

"Can we get the attention back to me please?" Whined Chris like a puppy not being treated nicely.

* * *

**Confessional: Sonic is as fast as a sonic boom … that or he's running to the bathroom.**

**Andy: That wasn't so bad; and for everyone watching this … it's 'Robotnik', Eggman is what children call him. But then again its kinda a kids series so who knows.**

**Uzuri: Teehee! He's called Robotnik and he makes robots; that's funny!**

**Chris: **(He is looking at something on his laptop). **Once again I stand thoroughly corrected … I hate these little smart asses!**

* * *

"Only two people left to go; Quana and Nakia." Said Chris as he reached into the hat. "You two should have good acts since you've had the longest to plan what you will be doing. Now … who's it going to be?"

Chris took a coin with Nakia's face on it out of the hat.

"Ok Nakia; time for you to throw away your dignity and act like Waluigi. Everyone else; time for a cheap laugh! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

Nakia flipped Chris the bird as she clenched her fists in anger as she got onto the stage feeling humiliated.

* * *

**Confessional: Weeeeeeh! That's Waluigi's catchphrase don'cha know?**

**Spider: I shouldn't laugh, Nakia will kill ***cough* **me in my sleep … but she looked so ***cough* **silly. **(Spider laughs).

**Quana: Maybe a little dose of pure humiliation will teach that girl some manners. I haven't forgotten that insult abut my Hispanic heritage! I just hope she doesn't win immunity … one more night with her and I may consider sleeping outside if myself and Eleanor can't throw her out.**

**Nakia: I hate Chris! Even if his hair is really top notch.**

**Chris: I'll take that as a compliment because my perfect hair really is awesome!**

* * *

Nakia felt both humiliated and furious that she had it dress in overalls and Cosplay as such a disliked character; Nakia felt she deserved better. Everyone else on the other hand would agree this was exactly what she deserved. (Insert Snarky Laughter Here).

"Weeeeeeh! I'm Waluigi, Look! I'm-a dance! I'm-a sing! I'm-a so happy. Wahahahaha." Said Nakia with extreme humiliation. It was clear she wasn't enjoying this at all. "I'm such a great character despite being so pug ugly … and my brother is Wario so I'm the semi handsome one by default. Weeeeeeeh! I've never appeared in a Mario game besides spin offs but it's only a matter of time before I'm-a the star! Wahahahaha! I'm-a the best and I are am an evil version of Luigi! And … urgh!"

Everyone in the audience was laughing; Kasimar was happy somebody besides himself was getting some humiliation and even Tabitha felt that this was quite humorous.

"Walugi the best! I am an expert with the bob-ombs! Boom! Weeeeeeh!" said Nakia as she starting getting more and more angry with the amount of laughter she was receiving.

"Ok; haha! I think that we can, snrrrk, end Nakia's performance, haha, there!" Laughed Chris in extreme amusement.

It took a moment for Chris to stop laughing his ass off before he resumed his normal sadistic expression.

"So Nakia; enjoying the humiliation?" Asked Chris.

"Shut the #bleep# up Maclean!" Snapped Nakia angrily; though in her Waluigi outfit she just didn't look very intimidating, she just looked like a purple big nosed clown more than anything else.

"Well I don't know if you'll get immunity or not ... but still; that was really funny! Haha!" Laughed Chris. "You may take your seat in the audience."

Nakia fumed as she got off the stage and sat back in the audience; she snarled to herself as someday she would have her revenge on these bad haired peasants. And when she did they would be practically _begging_ her for forgiveness.

* * *

**Confessional: Weeeeeeh! I'm-a Waluigi!**

**Lavender: **(She is laughing in mirth). **That was pure comedy gold! And seriously; that big nose makes Nakia almost as ugly as her personality.**

**Spider: Dressing up a Waluigi on ***cough* **international television … what could be more ***cough* **embarrassing.**

**Kasimar: Yahahahaha! Sucks to be Nakia!**

**Nakia: **(She has a murderous look on her face). **Those flippin bastards … they're gonna pay … they're gonna pay.**

**Xaria: **(She is trying not to laugh but quickly fails and starts laughing mirthfully).

**Quana: **(She is laughing her ass off). **Hahahahaha!**

* * *

"Ok then; with eleven of you done that just leaves Quana to finish off the challenge." Announced Chris. "Will she be as super as Mario? … I seriously doubt it! Haha!"

"We'll see Chris; we'll see." Said Quana as she got onto the stage to start her act.

"It's-a me, Mario! I'm-a the hero of the mushroom kingdom. From humble beginnings such as defeating a renegade ape to saving the whole galaxy I'm-a the best hero in overalls! I love-a pasta and when I was saving Isle Delino whenever I fell asleep I would-a always mumble the names of various pasta's! I'm Sonic's arch enemy but I always-a come out on top except in Death Battles on the internet! It's-a Mario time! Time to kick Bowser right in the shell!"

"Whether it's-a kart racing, mini games, stopping a thousand year old demon, sports of any description or maybe even fighting I'm-a there buddies! Anything is possible with-a the right attitude and a hammer! Never forget that-a advice friends-a! Before I go I have one critically important thing to say … its-a me, Mario! Woohoo!"

Quana made a signature Mario jump and struck a pose; the audience began to cheer. Nakia was the only one who didn't; even Kasimar cheered a little due to being physically attracted to Quana.

"Hmm … it was Mario … but it wasn't really super." Said Chris in a rather bored sounding voice. "But it'll do I suppose … as in it'll do for a final act, not sure about immunity. Well anyway; everyone get changed back into your normal attire and report back here. Once you're all present I'll reveal who has won immunity this time."

* * *

**Confessional: I'm immune to cold because I'm made of wood! LOL!**

**Quana: Everybody's a critic; Chris sure is hard to please in any way whatsoever. I tried my best to do a decent Cosplay. Well; I liked this challenge; Kasimar and Nakia both got some comeuppance for their actions and the challenge itself was pretty fun as well. **

**Uzuri: This challenge was fun! I liked bringing out my inner Australian … though I don't have any Australian blood in me. Oh well! Teehee!**

**Barney: Yaaaaar! What a challenge right me hearties? I lucked out choosing a pirate to cosplay. I'm feeling mighty good about my chances of receiving immunity today! Yo ho!**

* * *

The twelve campers were soon changed back into their normal cloths and stood in a space out group in front of Chris. Chris was currently silent and his silence was starting to get on the nerves of the campers as they wanted to know who had received immunity.

"…Can you hurry this up?" Whined Nakia.

"I'll speak when the time is right." Said Chris briefly.

"If you don't want me to kick you in the balls I suggest saying that right now is the right time." Said Xaria in a very deadpan voice.

Chris 'eeped' in fright and took a step away from Xaria.

"Ok, fine, I'll reveal the results." Whimpered Chris in fear. "You all tried your best … but for some of you your best just wasn't good enough. As IU said earlier four of you are getting immunity and the rest of you are vulnerable at tonight's vote. Some acts were just plain terrible but some were rather good."

"So who has immunity?" Asked Andy.

"I'm getting to that!" Snapped Chris. "Ok; the camper in first place today and also receiving a special prize is…

…

…

…

…

Jimmy because he accurately Cosplayed Ripto and I was always a fan of the classic Spyro games."

"Alright!" Cheered Jimmy as most of the other campers clapped.

"Jimmy; not only are you immune at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony but you get a special prize. Today's special prize is…

…

…

…

A cat costume! Perfect for Cosplay conventions."

"Hmm; that doesn't really seem 'me'. Can I just have some Candy instead?"

"Sorry, too bad too sad." Laughed Chris. "You'll have it and like it."

Jimmy shrugged as he was happy that he had won the challenge. Chris quickly continued to reveal who else had immunity.

"The second person with immunity today is…

…

…

…

…

Nakia because let's face it; she was just so funny!"

Nakia looked smugly at the people with looks of disbelief on their faces.

"This slightly makes up for the humiliation I wrongfully endured today." Said Nakia condescendingly.

"You've _**got**_ to be kidding me." Muttered Quana.

"The third person with immunity is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Barney; his portrayal of Razorbeard was just so … accurate and believable."

Barney tipped his hat in a bow and smiled.

"What can I say me hearties; I guess I just lucked out." Said Barney with a polite shrug.

"Good job Barney." Congratulated Lavender.

"Ok then; nine people without immunity and one place for immunity left … the final immunity spot goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Kasimar because he made me laugh!"

"Yeah! Yahahaha! In your #bleep# faces you stupid retards! Kiss my ass!" Laughed Kasimar.

The sounds of complaints and protests arose from most of the campers but Chris ignored them until they quieted down. Tabitha didn't show it but she was relieved that two of her alliance members had gotten immunity.

"Your complaints cannot make me change my mind." Said Chris with a smug sadistic smile. "The best cosplayers won. As it stands Jimmy, Nakia, Barney and Kasimar have won immunity. The rest of you … one of you is getting voted off tonight."

"You are such a biased bigot." Frowned Xaria.

"Oh whatever bumble bee; go and make some honey!" Replied Chris with a satisfied grin. "Now if you losers will excuse me its time for my massage and free latté so I'll see you all at the Bonfire Ceremony tonight. Ciao!"

Chris left for his massage after flipping the bird to all twelve campers; most the campers grumbled at the fact Nakia and Kasimar were both immune as they dispersed to kill time until the Bonfire Ceremony.

* * *

**Confessional: Killing time? I can do that easily by stabbing an alarm clock! LOL!**

**Tabitha: I decided to talk strategy with Nakia and Kasimar; at this point it would be a good idea to pick off the threats so by the time only a few camper remain we'll only be left with the weakest opposition. But things are rarely as simple as we would like them to be…**

**Jimmy: Alright! I won the challenge! Looks like I'm here for another day. When I win that money I'm going to buy the local sweet shop; I might even get a discount since I'm on the list of their top ten most valued customers … so maybe…**

* * *

Tabitha was meeting up with Kasimar and Nakia in the woods outside the camp; she was going to talk about who they should eliminate next. In Tabitha's opinion the prime candidates were Lavender and Xaria as they were very adept at the challenges most of the time. When Tabitha arrived at the clearing they usually met up at Nakia and Kasimar were already there and looked like they were agreeing on something.

"Hey guys; good job on winning immunity, I knew I could rely on you." Said Tabitha to flatter her allies and keep them loyal to her though she was thinking something like... "_Though I hardly trust you if at all_."

"Thanks; so … now we've got to choose somebody to vote out right?" Said Nakia.

"Exactly; I'm thinking either Lavender or Xaria as they're probably the biggest threats at the moment."

"I could think of better options." Grunted Kasimar.

"It's not about who you want to see gone." Sighed Tabitha. "It's strategy; if we pick of the strongest of our opposition now then we'll have an easier time when the challenges get harder."

"Well I have a better idea who to vote off; somebody who should go immediately, before Lavender and Xaria even." Said Nakia.

"Spider right? He's not a threat!" Said Tabitha sounding frustrated. "We'll get him at our earliest possible convenience but that time hasn't arrived yet."

"I wasn't talking about Spider." Said Nakia airily.

"Then who?" Asked Tabitha curiously.

After a moment of silence Kasimar lost patience and grunted obnoxiously.

"She means Uzuri." Explained Kasimar. "And I'm in agreement with her."

"But Uzuri is in this alliance!" Said Tabitha in exasperation. "It's in our best interests to keep her around."

"Not #bleep# likely; she revealed to everyone I was dressing as Princess Peach and got me more humiliation than I would have otherwise had. And I kinda hate her as well." Explained Kasimar.

"And she's just so annoying! She also gives me a lot of lip! That mouthy asswipe has to go!" Chimed in Nakia. "I refuse to work with her."

"But if Uzuri goes we'll only have three votes in our favor." Reasoned Tabitha. "It'll therefore be harder to vote out the people we want."

"Well think of it this way." Said Nakia smugly. "If you keep Uzuri me and Kasimar will not only ditch you but we'll blow your cover as well. What's it gonna be? Vote off the freak and have three votes in your favor … or keep her and end up with two votes in your favor … or likely even less."

Tabitha blinked and snarled.

"Are you blackmailing me?" Asked Tabitha angrily.

"Blackmail is _such_ an ugly word." Said Nakia with a rather nasty grin. "I prefer to call it righting the wrongs."

"Make your choice Tabitha." Added Kasimar. "I don't care who I'm with as long as I can stay in the game … but I want Uzuri gone. Break up your alliance with her … got it?"

Tabitha growled but sighed as she had no way out of this.

"Ok fine! I'll do it." Said Tabitha irritably. "But you two seriously owe me one; another stunt like this and I might sabotage both of you in challenges."

"Reverse blackmail? Impressive." Said Kasimar in acknowledgement. "So … are we in agreement?"

"Heck yeah." Nodded Nakia.

"Fine; but next time I'm deciding who leaves." Said Tabitha as she walked away muttering to herself. "_You stupid traitorous jackasses_"

"I think I'm going to enjoy this." Chuckled Kasimar to himself.

"Same here; that ugly girl simply has to go." Agreed Nakia.

"Oh; and if you try anything like this on me I'll slit your throat, got it?" Said Kasimar to assert the fact he was higher ranked than Nakia so to speak.

"Yes sir." Whimpered Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional: Stab in the back and twist … brutal traitorism.**

**Tabitha: **(She has her head in her hand and looks annoyed). **Great, just **_**GREAT**_**! I'm in a situation where I'm losing part of my alliance no matter what … well; I knew I was going to have to backstab Uzuri eventually … but I was gonna do it around the final four. Well; change of plan I guess. Well; I can still pull off a win with an alliance of three. It'll be myself, Kasimar and Nakia in the finals … with me on top. Here I go then … and I know how to make Uzuri stay silent as well. ...Oh I wish this day had never come...**

**Andy: I don't know why … but I can feel the winds of change blowing in the air.**

**Nakia: Time to take out the trash; well, the recyclable trash I suppose because nobody is more trashy than Spider is.**

* * *

Uzuri was in a different part of the forest and was blissfully unaware of the plan that had been set in motion. Currently she was sitting on a stump a distance outside camp with her Little Miss Emo doll; she was thinking to herself … though rather than strategy is was about which movie she should buy a backstage pass to with the prize money if she won.

"It's been a fun eighteen days so far; and I've still got ten more to go. Maybe I could win the whole competition; that would really stick it to Chris." Said Uzuri to herself. "What do you think little Miss Emo?"

Uzuri pulled the strong on her doll and it began to say another one of it's over nine thousand catchphrases.

"_An empty stadium is like life; empty, pointless and full of the urge to end it all. Heheheheheh_!" Laughed the emo doll it it's usual scary laugh.

"I wonder who I should vote for tonight … I guess Tabitha will tell me." Pondered Uzuri.

At that moment Tabitha walked into the vicinity and spotted Uzuri. Uzuri looked up and saw Tabitha walking over to her and gave a cheery wave.

"Hi Tabitha; you did really good at the challenge today. It's too bad that Kasimar and Nakia won immunity; they're as horrible as clotted blood." Said Uzuri spookily.

"Err; yeah." Said Tabitha in mild disgust at the mental image. "Could you please tone down the sadistic insults a little? I don't want the mental images and I need to tell you something important so I need your attention."

"Okey dokie Tabitha; what is it?" Asked Uzuri as she focused her attention on Tabitha. "Is it about who we're voting off?"

"In a manner of speaking … yes." Stated Tabitha. "Ok; how do I put this…?"

"Put what? Is something the matter?" Asked Uzuri in concern.

"Ok; you know we're in an alliance right?" Said Tabitha with a sudden look of deviousness in her eye's that Uzuri didn't notice.

"Uh huh; why, are we getting anew member?" Asked Uzuri with a smile.

"Actually … its over." Said Tabitha calmly.

"What? Why?" Asked Uzuri in surprise. "I thought the alliance was working out well."

"Well let's just say … I've got a better deal." Smirked Tabitha which Uzuri noticed and was confused by.

"But … I'm your friend. Shouldn't friends come before monetary gain?" Asked Uzuri softly.

"… You really don't know do you?" Asked Tabitha with a chuckle.

"Know what?" Said Uzuri sounding a little upset now.

"I was _**never**_ your friend and furthermore I most certainly never _**EVER**_ will be." Said Tabitha in a very mean tone of voice. "To me you're just a freak; somebody who normal people shouldn't have the misfortune of being exposed to."

Uzuri looked stunned as a tear exited her eye.

"From the start you were _pathetically_ easy to manipulate; your desperation for friends and acceptance made it all the more convenient for me." Smirked Tabitha. "I mean; who do you think was responsible for the elimination of Yessica, Gary and also Spider's allergy attack? I thank you for being a decent pawn in my game plan … but in all seriousness, given the choice, I would have not wanted **anything** to do with you, you little _freak_."

Uzuri looked like she was about to burst into tears as this was an extreme emotional blow. Tabitha looked completely passive and indifferent to all this.

"But … why?" said Uzuri as she started sobbing.

"I have my reasons." Said Tabitha simply. "And just so you know … you'd better not tell anyone of what has just occurred."

"…Why shouldn't I you horrible _**BITCH**_!" Yelled Uzuri in extreme sadness and fury.

"Because if you do open your freaky little mouth I will have the powerful lawyers in my family have your house taken from you; you'll live on the streets … and unless I'm mistaken I seriously doubt anyone would want to help you … you little **freak**." Finished Tabitha nastily. "Ciao; see you at the ceremony … and don't think I won't carry out my threats because I would. Thanks for making the game so much easier."

As Tabitha left Uzuri's heart beat painfully fast; in a few moments she burst into tears. Her so called best friend had used her the entire time. And she felt no remorse. How could she?

"Why?" Whispered Uzuri between miserable sobs.

* * *

**Confessional: The twenty fifth letter of the alphabet.**

**Uzuri: **(She just sobs and as she looks up at the camera she just whimpers in misery).

**Tabitha: Brutal but necessary ... but I didn't want to do that; that was wrong even by my standards. But, what choice do I have? If I don't win...**

**Andy: As long as Tabitha is in this game and isn't immune I'm voting for her every single time from now on. And thus … I vote Tabitha.**

**Quana: I vote Xaria; it's not that I don't like her or anything … I just don't know her as well as almost everyone else.**

**Spider: I'm voting for either** *cough*** Lavender as she's a threat or** *cough*** Tabitha as I don't know her very well… who to** *cough*** choose. Hmm … got it. **(Spider takes a coin out of his pocket). **Heads I vote for** *cough*** Lavender, tails I vote for Tabitha. **(Spider flips the coin). **Heads … I vote Lavender … sorry.**

**Nakia: looks like everything is working out as planned; I vote Uzuri and I hope the boat explodes with her on it! That'll teach her for being so rude to me.**

**Jimmy: **(He is holding a coin). **Heads I vote for Uzuri; tails I vote for Tabitha. **(Jimmy flips the coin). **Heads; sorry Uzuri. I hope you have fun at the Playa.**

* * *

The sun had set on the horizon and the moon was out over Wawanakwa Island. The twelve campers were seated around the Bonfire Pit on stumps and logs. Some looked confident they would stay; other looked irritated that Nakia and Kasimar had immunity, some were a little worried and one was sad. Uzuri had a horrible and sad feeling in her gut but was managing to keep her face neutral. Maybe she was going tonight … but maybe fortune would smile upon her and she would stay.

"_Why didn't I listen to Andy_." Thought Uzuri.

Andy meanwhile was seated on the stump next to Uzuri; he felt quite calm and didn't think he was in any danger of being voted off. He had noticed Uzuri's slightly blank expression, he had also noticed Tabitha's casual smirk. He noticed that Uzuri wasn't sitting next to Tabitha like usual and he wondered if Tabitha had done what he had been dreading.

Chris arrived with a tray of eleven marshmallows and put them on the oil drum that he stood behind every ceremony. He was silent for a few seconds before he spoke up to the twelve campers in front of him.

"Campers; we have reached the final twelve. After tonight only eleven will remain and we'll be in the home stretch. Tomorrow will begin the countdown as only ten days will remain until one of you wins a million dollars; quite a handsome sum of money though not as handsome as me! Haha!"

"Get on with it Maclean." Said Xaria as she sat on her stump with her arms crossed as she looked up at the starry sky.

"I'm about to!" Whined Chris.

"I agree with Xaria; it's cold tonight and I'd like to check on Frost and Dandelion." Added Eleanor as she sat on another stump and began to hum a tune to herself.

"Ok; fine, whatever!" Snapped Chris as he picked up one of the marshmallows. "When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe and will still be here for tomorrow. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … that means you are out … and you can't come back … ever."

Chris held up the marshmallow for all to see and resumed speaking.

"The first four marshmallows go to our challenge winners who are immune." Said Chris.

"Jimmy"

"Nakia"

"Barney"

"Kasimar"

Those four got up and claimed there marshmallows while the remaining eight campers stayed seated and waited for the ceremony to continue."

"Ok then; the first marshmallow to go to a votable person goes to … Quana."

"Spider"

"Andy"

"Eleanor"

"Xaria"

"Tabitha"

Only Lavender and Uzuri remained without a marshmallow; Uzuri simply hung her head and looked at her shows while Lavender looked a little worried and gripped the sides of her stump.

"Lavender … Uzuri … this is the final marshmallow of the night; one of you is about to lose their chance at the million and must walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back … ever. The final marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Lavender."

Lavender gave a sigh of relief and smiled as she got up and took her marshmallow. She was still in the game for now.

Uzuri sighed sadly as she had been eliminated. Not only that but she had been betrayed by her so called best friend on the same day.

"Well Uzuri; you're out … can't say I'm unhappy; in fact, it just goes to show that freaks never get anywhere in the world! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "To the dock of shame with you and good riddance! Haha!"

"…Screw you Chris." Said Uzuri sadly. "See you around guys; good job on getting to the final eleven … good job to most of you anyway."

With a last wave Uzuri started to walk to the dock of shame. The remaining eleven waved goodbye; even Tabitha did so as not to make anybody suspicious.

"Well everyone; you're all safe … this time. You can all go back to your cabins." Said Chris. "As for me I'm going to drink a latté."

Chris left as did ten of the campers. One camper stayed behind; after looking back and seeing nobody was still there he quickly ran to the dock of shame after Uzuri since she hadn't left yet.

"Hey Uzuri!" Called Andy.

Uzuri turned around on the dock looking very depressed and managed to make a small smile.

"Oh hi Andy; need something." Said Uzuri with a small sniffle.

"Let me guess; Tabitha betrayed you didn't she?" Said Andy sympathetically.

"…I should have listened to you." Said Uzuri while fighting back the urge to cry. "Tabitha was so brutal … she didn't even care how upset she was making me. You were right all along. I'm such a stupid idiotic fool."

"Don't put yourself down." Said Andy nicely. "Sometimes … the more we like someone the more blind we are to their faults. I just wish I could have said something."

"Why didn't you?" Asked Uzuri.

"Tabitha was blackmailing me; she said … if I told anyone she'd make Mable homeless." Explained Andy bitterly.

"She said she'd make me homeless too." Said Uzuri. "…You're a good person Andy; I can see why Mable likes you. I'm sorry I yelled at you yesterday."

"No need to apologize." Smiled Andy.

"Give her heck Andy." Said Uzuri with a small smile as she boarded the boat of losers which took off into the night.

"…I will Uzuri." Promised Andy. "It's _**war**_ now."

* * *

As the boat of losers sailed away towards the Playa Des Losers Uzuri sat on a box that was on board and sighed to herself.

"I'm such a gullible lemming; I bet Chris is laughing so much now that I'm gone. Am I a freak?" Sniffled Uzuri.

"Don't put yourself down." Said a familiar voice from behind her. "You're not a freak; in fact, quite the opposite. You're one of the best people I've ever met."

Uzuri turned around with a sudden smile and standing there was Vinnie with a warm comforting smile on his face.

"Vinnie!" Squeed Uzuri as she hugged her boyfriend. "I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too Uzuri." Said Vinnie. "I saw everything from the Playa. I'm so sorry I couldn't do anything about it."

"It's alright … all good things must come to an end I guess." Said Uzuri with a sad sniffle.

"I think I know how to turn that frown upside down." Said Vinnie as he reached for something in the corner of the boat.

"What is it?" Asked Uzuri.

"A present from your parents; yours got delayed in the mail and arrived at the Playa earlier today. Want to read it?" Asked Vinnie as he gave Uzuri a box and an envelope.

"Do I ever." Said Uzuri excitedly as she opened the letter and began to read it.

_Dear Uzuri_

_We hope you are having a great time on Total Drama letterz. We have watched every episode and we are so proud of how well you are doing. We can see that you've made some good friends … but that Tabitha girl is not nice. She's using you. Don't let her get away with her schemes._

_It looks like you've been hit with cupid's arrow judging by the way you look that that Vinnie boy as well as your 'unique' way of flirting. We completely support you liking him and if you two hook up we would love to meet him. It's about time you had some true friends._

_Do not pay any attention to what Chris says to you; he is a nasty bully and mark our words he will get what he deserves in the end as bad people usually do. He is wrong about you; you are not a freak at all; you are a special and wonderful young lady and don't let anybody tell you otherwise._

_We miss you and win or lose we're very proud of you all the same. Now enjoy your summer on wawanakwa; and remember, when flirting with Vinnie, eye contact!_

_Love from your mummy and daddy_

Uzuri was smiling happily with a few happy tears in her eyes when she finished the letter. Vinnie was smiling as well; he hadn't read the letter but seeing his girlfriend happy made him happy as well.

"Also; the box contains some doughnuts judging by the smell; shall we share them together?" Asked Vinnie.

Uzuri looked at Vinnie for a moment before glomping him as they shared a sweet tender kiss while the moonlight shone down from the starry ski above them.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame looking very pleased indeed. He gave a wave to the camera and flashed his pearly whites.

"Day eighteen, like the cosplaying, has ended. Uzuri had been betrayed and voted off which she deserves! Haha! Good riddance! Only eleven campers remain and ten challenges are still to be done. Who will be the next camper to walk the dock of shame? Will Tabitha feel guilt … not likely! Will the next challenge be very big or simply _trivial_? And will anything exciting happen? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Andy: Tabitha

Barney: Tabitha

Eleanor: Lavender

Jimmy: Uzuri

Kasimar: Uzuri

Lavender: Uzuri

Nakia: Uzuri

Quana: Xaria

Spider: Lavender

Tabitha: Uzuri

Uzuri: (Didn't vote due to crying).

Xaria: Eleanor

Uzuri: 5

Lavender: 2

Tabitha: 2

Xaria: 1

Eleanor: 1

Discounted votes: 1

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri.

* * *

I really didn't want to do that. Uzuri was one of my very favorite characters and personally I really wish she could have stayed for longer … but for plot reasons this is where she was scheduled to go. Tabitha will get her comeuppance, don't you worry.

Uzuri was quite oddball and strange. Her main purpose in the story was to show that people can be different and strange yet still be wonderful and nice individuals. In a way her point was to challenge prejudice and people who hate differences. Plus she was funny as well. But we'll be seeing her again from time to time, I promise.

I should probably head for the hills since I'm positive some people will be angry about this … but at least the chapter ended nicely for Uzuri right?

Next Time: It's time for another episode of Total Ousted Alphabet; look forward to interviews with Vinnie, Daisy, Oscar, Mable and Uzuri.


	40. Total Ousted Alphabet 4

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own every single one of the twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning:** This chapter contains blue jelly, a humiliation conga, sappy romance and blue hair. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's interesting fact: **Tabitha may be mean, schemish, fairly nasty and also a blackmailing cruel person … but despite all that she has a good side; she also has a very valid Freudian excuse. Bet you didn't know that!

**Note: **Time for the fourth aftermath! Fans of Eddie and Sasha can rest easy because they are back. I've been writing this chapter ALL DAY and I'm being completely honest about that. I hope you enjoy the fruits of my labors and maybe review to make it all worthwhile. Enjoy!

Do you like pancakes? Yeah we like pancakes!

* * *

The stage lights were switched on and shone down on a large stage that was located in a decently large room. Many audience members that have so significance to the plot whatsoever were seated in the audience and were buying snacks for the latest episode of Total Ousted Alphabet that was about to begin.

On the stage was three arm chairs; one was empty but sitting in one of them was Eddie Lynmoire and in the other was Sasha Tasset. To the audiences right of the stage was a large three row sofa with a sign above it with the words 'peanut gallery' written on it. Sitting on the bottom row from left to right were Patch, Yessica, Fifi, Carlton, Hector, Irene and Raven with Gary in his wheelchair beside Raven. On the middle row from left to right were Zita and Wallace. Currently the top row was empty.

Currently Eddie was making notes and seemed to be concentrating hard while Sasha was as usual playing on her DS; the game was making a few bopping and jumping sounds which suggested that it might have been a platformer.

"Come on; don't fall down the pit! Hit it in the eye." Said Sasha with her eyes practically glued to the DS screen and focusing on her game.

"…Hmmm; he also crossed the line when he…"Mumbled Eddie as he jotted down more notes in his note book.

"Mr. Lynmoire, Mrs. Tasset, you're live on the air in three, two, one." Said a camera man intern from behind one of the stage camera's.

Eddie pocketed his notebook and Sasha paused her game and they waved to the cameras.

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Greeted Eddie.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Smiled Sasha.

"Welcome to another exciting episode of, dun, dun, dun, Total Ousted Alphabet!" Announced Eddie. "It's been a longer wait than usual and for that we apologize; but if we kept having a show every four episodes we'd end up with having an episode with only one guest and that wouldn't do at all."

"But if the guest was Kasimar we could easily chew up half an hour by electrocuting him." Pointed out Sasha. "And that's not counting the prospect of dropping a piano on him."

"His karma is building up; it's going to go off like a nuclear bomb when the time is right." Said Eddie longingly. "One of these days he's going to be wishing he hadn't been such a negative dickhead."

"I could think of a few more bad words to describe him." Chuckled Sasha. "But Kasimar sadly isn't a guest this episode; but we have five voted off campers to interview, one of which has been here before."

"Maybe Daisy wouldn't have been booted off early again if she hadn't been such a self centered brat." Pondered Eddie. "But you can't change the past."

"I have plans for that brat this episode." Said Sasha darkly.

"Oh yeah; she hurt you didn't she." Said Eddie sympathetically. "Along with Nakia she's my least favorite of the female contestants."

"Getting my ponytail yanked bloody hurts … wait; don't you dislike Tabitha too?" Asked Sasha.

"Of course; but even she has more morals than Dunce and Nonce." Explained Eddie.

"I guess that's true." Said Sasha before smiling to the camera. "Anyway; before we introduce our first guest we have to reintroduce you to some familiar faces … that's right; I'm talking about the peanut gallery."

"Give a polite clap or a piece of healthy celery to Patch; the lowest ranking camper due to Daisy's return." said Eddie as Patch gave a wave.

"Celery tastes like poopies!" Gagged Patch before belching.

"I'm not sure how he knows that but next on the line up is Yessica; a bubbly blond with a love of the water as well as mango smoothies!" Said Sasha gesturing to Yessica.

"Hiya's everyone! The Playa Des Losers is awesome!" Chirped Yessica

"Give a round of applause to Fifi; once a man hater but now a kind hearted feminist with pink hair; you gotta have pink hair." Said Eddie as Fifi gave a polite gave to the audience.

"Men and women are equal; it's the correct view." Smiled Fifi. "Enjoy the show everyone!"

"Keep the applause quiet because the next person is scared of noise; it's Carlton!" Said Sasha as a stage light shone down on Carlton.

"Aaaaargh! I'm scared of stage lights! Make it go away!" Wailed Carlton in terror.

"You heard him guys; take away the stage light." Said Sasha as the light moved away from Carlton.

"Thank you." Said Carlton shakily.

"An IQ test is easy for this guy; and he's currently working on a Sudoku book, gave a wave for Hector." Said Eddie with a smile as Hector looked up from a thick Sudoku puzzle book.

"Greetings everyone; I hope you enjoy the episode as much as I'm enjoying the Playa … which is a mighty amount." Smiled Hector good naturedly.

"Forget tea time; its tree time, Irene will agree to that testament; give her a wave!" Announced Sasha as Irene waved to the audience.

"My summer has been more fun than a zero gravity leaf collecting contest; the more the leafier!" Whooped Irene.

"She used to be shy but she's now an outgoing plucky sweetheart; give a big cheer for Raven!" Cheered Eddie.

"Hi everyone." Smiled Raven sweetly. "My leg feels much better than it did; when I see Kasimar I'm going to whack him with my crutches."

"I look forward to seeing that." Smirked Eddie.

"He cooks, he can fight and he came close to beating Kasimar in combat; give a well earned applause to Gary!" Cheered Sasha as Gary waved as he sat in his wheelchair.

"I'm gonna cook up a storm of karma for that asshole Kasimar." Promised Gary. "Karma has no mercy."

"She has urges to steal but is still a truly nice person; give a wave for Zita!" Said Eddie as he gestured to Zita who waved to the crowd with a smile on her face.

"I've managed to go two whole days without stealing something." Said Zita proudly. "These stress relieving squeezy toys really work."

"And lastly and also most evilly in his opinion; give it up for Wallace … or The Wallace as he likes to be called." Said Sasha to finish of the introduction.

"Mwahahahahahahahaha! I'm in a _very_ evil mood today! I'm so evil I swapped the butter for margarine at breakfast today!" Cackled Wallace evilly as he always did.

"Yep; that's our ten commentators for this episode." Said Sasha cheerfully. "They'll be supplying us with their thoughts on what the guests say as well as a supply of snarky comments I think."

"Snarkyness is next to evilness! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace like a madman.

"…moving on from that, the wait is over. That's right! It's time for our first guest of the night!" said Sasha enthusiastically. "Care to give the introduction Eddie?"

"Not a problem my friend." Said Eddie as he gestured to the audiences left of the stage. "He has a metal arm he names 'Pinchy', he got off on the wrong foot with Fifi but they have made up since then, he is Russian in decent and he's dating Uzuri. Let's give it up for Vinnie!"

Vinnie walked out from backstage and was met with a loud cheering from the audience. He waved with his metal arm and sat down in the guest chair.

"Welcome to Total Ousted Alphabet Vinnie." Greeted Eddie. "How are you feeling?"

"A lot less stressed than the eleven still in the game; I'll tell you that much." Said Vinnie sounding at ease. "The Playa is everything I expected it to be; relaxing, sunny and enjoyable. A great vacation spot."

"So Vinnie; you lasted very nearly to the halfway point and managed to outlast thirteen other campers before you walked the dock of shame." Said Sasha sounding impressed. "How do you feel you did overall in your opinion?"

"I think I did alright; I may not have won the million or made the merge but I had a pretty good time. I had some close shaves at the Bonfire Ceremonies but when I was eliminated it was my own decision." Said Vinnie as he briefly thought back to his time on the island. "I think I did pretty well for a guy with one organic arm. Turns out you don't actually need both arms to do well in competitions; arms are so overrated."

"I'm going to take your word for it." Said Zita as she glanced down at her arms. "I'm happy with keeping both my arms."

"I don't blame you; it's hard not having a right arm … but I'm a lefty anyway." Shrugged Vinnie. "I've gotten used to it over the years."

"You're definitely made of stronger stuff than me Vinnie." Said Eddie as he sipped some water from the cup on the left arm of his chair. "Out of those who didn't make the merge or those who managed to return you did the best; in fact, you were the last one gone before the merge arrived. Were you disappointed at all?"

"Nope; I left on my own accord so Uz could stay; I was determined to not let Chris get the last laugh this time." Said Vinnie truthfully.

"Uz? Is that Uzuri's nickname?" Asked Sasha with a playful smirk.

"More of a pet name." Said Vinnie. "After all; Spider and Quana aren't the only ones allowed to bestow poet names on each other."

"If I had a boyfriend I'd like him to call me dolphin as a pet name." Giggled Yessica.

"You know Vinnie; if Chris gave out cash prizes and special awards you win the best sportsmanship award. Giving up a million dollars so your girlfriend could stay; that was very noble of you." Said Sasha in admiration. "Definitely very unselfish."

"If you really love someone you should be prepared to make sacrifices for them." Explained Vinnie.

"What a good egg." Smiled Irene.

"I love eggs; they taste like an eggy weggy!" Said Patch as he drooled a little.

"Anybody want to change seats?" Asked Yessica hopefully.

"Sorry but no." Murmured Raven.

"I'm happy up here." Said Wallace.

"I can't move from here." Said Gary gesturing to his wheelchair.

"One thing the audience probably want to know; you and Fifi didn't really get off on the right foot in the short time you were team mates." Began Eddie. "Why was that?"

"I knew this was going to be asked … just so you know Fifi and I are friends now." Said Vinnie.

"He's telling the truth." Assured Fifi.

"Ok; well … she just seemed to single me out and act more sexist to me than the other guys; I actually didn't start the whole thing." Said Vinnie before looking a little ashamed. "But … I really did say some seriously stupid stuff so Fifi was right to be mad."

"True." Said Carlton. "If more people thought before they spoken the world wouldn't be so scary."

"To be honest though." Said Fifi also looking ashamed. "What he said had _absolutely_ nothing to do with what angered me in the slightest. I just … hated him because he was a guy. I know now how I acted was very wrong and I regret it deeply."

"It wasn't really your fault Fifi." Smiled Vinnie. "I could have been a little less of a … well; a huge prick."

"It's all in the past thought right you two?" Said Sasha gently.

"Right on." Agreed Fifi.

"Thank goodness as well; Fifi is actually really sweet when you get to know her properly." Agreed Vinnie.

"Another thing we want to ask you about … care to talk about your relationship with Uzuri?" Asked Eddie with a look on his face that was both sly and comical.

"Sure; what do you want to know?" Shrugged Vinnie with a blush.

"What attracts you most about Uzuri?" Asked Eddie with a fair amount of interest.

"I couldn't name one because a whole bunch of things attract me about her." Said Vinnie with a happy airy voice. "She's cute, she's a lot smarter and deeper than she appears to be and she's a whole lot of fun! But most of all; she's very unusual but still a genuinely nice person; she really proves how wrong being prejudice is."

"What a lovely way to put it." Cooed Irene sweetly.

"Tabitha was so wrong to think of Uzuri as she did." Agreed Hector.

Vinnie visibly frowned at the mention of Tabitha's name which everyone noticed.

"I take it you're not very pleased with Tabitha at the moment are you?" Asked Sasha hesitantly.

"Not a bit. I thought she was a nice, caring and considerate person who always looked at the positives … but I was wrong." Said Vinnie sounding upset and angry. "She's a nasty, manipulative, prejudiced aristocrat bitch! How dare she do that to Uz! Tabitha made her cry and didn't even care at all!"

"Some people just want to achieve their goals and don't care who they hurt in the process." Frowned Hector in agreement. "Kind of like Voldemort."

"I can attest to that; the guy's pure evil." Said Gary from his wheelchair. "I'd like to fry him like deep fried fries at MacDonald's!"

"Oh Gary; I love it when you try and talk tough; emphasis on try." Giggled Raven.

"Thanks sweetie." Blushed Gary.

"So Vinnie; out of the remaining contestants who would you like to see win?" Asked Eddie curiously.

"Anybody but Nakia, Kasimar and especially Tabitha. All three of them deserve the most brutal karma and humiliation." Stated Vinnie.

"I think it's time for some, dun, dun, dun, fan mail!" Announced Eddie as he produced a large sack of letters from behind his arm chair. "Care to hear what people want to say to you?"

"Sure; sounds interesting." Said Vinnie as he looked at the sack of mail addressed to him.

"Ok then; let's get this mail van a-moving." Said Eddie has he took out a letter and opened it. "This one is from Derrick. Dear Vinnie; stop ripping off Thomas the Tank Engine! It makes you unoriginal and generic!"

"Huh?" Said Vinnie sounding confused.

"I'll take that question." Said Wallace. "There was a villain in Thomas the tank engine called Diesel 10 who had a hydraulic claw on his back called pinchy which also happens to be the, ahem, 'name' of Vinnie's metal arm. Like all bad guys Diesel 10 had a weakness … sugar and weak viaducts! Mwahahahahahaha!"

"And you know this how?" Asked Zita with a smirk.

"Do tell." Said Irene sounding amused.

"…I'm allowed guilty pleasures ok!" Said Wallace defensively.

"The next letter if from Monty. Dear Vinnie; what do you see in Uzuri? She's nuts! They say you are what you eat and she's nuts! You'd be better off with someone else." Eddie blinked. "That was rather tactless."

"We all like who we like; I'm going to fall back on an old standard and say at least I have a girlfriend … though I have no way of knowing if he has one or not." Said Vinnie to defend Uzuri. "Are there any nice letters in there?"

"This one looks pretty nice." Said Eddie as he read through a third letter. "Dear Vinnie; you rock! You've proved that even people with slight disabilities can go far. If you hadn't quit so Uzuri could stay I bet you would have won the whole show … though I think you did a very admirable thing. Good luck in life and also a possible third season if you're allowed to participate! From a big fan; Ginny."

"I'm flattered; though to be honest I'm not sure if I could have won the whole thing; something tells me if I ever went one on one with Barney in the finals I'd get the tar whupped out of me." Chuckled Vinnie. "Still; I might have stood a small chance at getting to the final ten."

"It would have been good if you ended up in a tie breaker with Kasimar." Said Fifi. "I'm thinking if the tie breaker was an arm wrestle you'd break his hand. I'd watch that over and over."

"As would I." Agreed Gary.

"It's been nice talking with you Vinnie; and it seems that you were the only member of your team who wasn't a victim of Tabitha." Noted Eddie. "I guess you got lucky in some respects. We need to move on now so could you take a seat on the peanut gallery?"

"Sure Eddie; though I'm not looking forward to seeing the person who is getting interviewed next." Frowned Vinnie. "She insulted Uzuri when we arrived at the playa."

"Well I have some plans for her; don't you worry." Smirked Sasha darkly.

Vinnie got up from the interviewee armchair and sat on the bleachers next to Wallace.

"You have a devious twinkle in your eyes Sasha; any reason why?" Asked Eddie though he did have a hunch.

"Let's just say I'm going to give Daisy a pierce of my mind for how she treats everyone; as humiliation conga if you will." Chuckled Sasha. "Anyway; our next guest was voted off first, returned to the competition, was voted off the same day she returned, has no friends and has an extreme superiority complex. Give a cheer, or probably not, for Daisy!"

Daisy strode out from backstage and the audience began booing and jeering as well as throwing cans and tomatoes. Daisy screamed in fury at this as she sat down on the interviewee guest chair.

"Welcome back Daisy." Smirked Sasha.

"Shut up!" Screamed Daisy angrily.

"She just greeted you." Said Eddie disapprovingly. "It's precisely that attitude that led to your second elimination."

"Oh shut up! I demand that you show me respect!" Snarled Daisy with a few twitches of rage on her face.

"Needless to say it, but I'll go ahead and say it anyway, you're upset about being eliminated again aren't you?" Asked Sasha. "I guess it's your karma for attacking me in the hair gel hunt."

"Shut your mouth and obey me you little slutty whore!" Screamed Daisy.

"Hey! I recommend you do not talk to Sasha like that; it'll only result in the return of a familiar faceless face." Warned Eddie with a glare.

"Whatever; you don't scare me, what with your drop dead ugly face and your probably pitiful grades!" Scoffed Daisy snootily.

"Actually I'm an A student." Replied Eddie calmly.

"Well I think you'll find that _actually_ I'm an A _plus_ student so because of that whatever you say to me doesn't really count. So ha!" Smirked Daisy condescendingly.

"Man am I glad she didn't end up on my team." Muttered Carlton.

"What was that you meek little cowardly whelp?" Shrieked Daisy.

"N-n-nothing!" Gulped Carlton.

"Leave him alone!" Said Yessica firmly. "He may get scared easily but at least he isn't a delusional self absorbed jerkass of a shitheaded brat!"

"Go Yessica!" Cheered Raven.

"Shut up!" Screamed Daisy as her face started to turn red as ketchup in rage.

"With a face like that you could be called the scarlet pimpernel! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he turned on his theme music.

"Turn off that racket!" Roared Daisy. "And stop insulting me you peasant!"

"Peasants can be better than the snooty folk like you; take Jack the Ripper." Shrugged Wallace.

"Nobody knows who he was." Pointed out Hector. "I think he was the royal family's doctor … but in those days there were civilians, not peasants."

"It's the same thing." Hand waved Wallace as he switched off his theme music.

"So Daisy; you really don't like your insufferably large ego being insulted do you?" Asked Sasha. "And let me tell you … you think everyone likes you but really you come across as an unlikable bully."

"Shut up you failed abortion!" Screamed Daisy in fury as a vein appeared on her forehead. "I demand to get what I deserve!"

"…I believe that can be arranged." Said Sasha with a sudden look of deviousness on her face as she took out a remote.

"What's that?" Asked Daisy very rudely.

"The penalty for being a bratty prideful bitch." Replied Sasha as she pressed a button the remote.

Instantly a large gush of sticky and slimy blue jelly fell down like torrential rainforest rain right onto Daisy.

"Aaaaargh!" Screamed Daisy in mortified horror. "My cloths!"

"Yummy jelly!" Smiled Patch dumbly.

"I'll kill you!" Screamed Daisy with a _**murderous**_ as she lunged at Sasha.

Predictably to most of you who know Daisy's luck the bratty teachers pet slipped on a path of excess blue jelly and slipped off the stage. She fell right into a tub of even stickier blue jelly that had been set up and she screamed, blubbered and wailed in horror, anger, rage and extreme embarrassment.

"My cloths! Waaaaaaah!" Wailed Daisy as she ran right out of the viewing room as everyone laughed at her.

"Mwahahahahaha! That was pure evil!" Cackled Wallace as lightning was heard outside the building. "Hey Sasha; have you ever thought of joining the dark side?"

"I'd prefer to keep my sanity." Said Sasha simply.

"Bah humbug! Sanity is just another word for good." Said Wallace with a grumble. "It's like that in the wrong hands my intelligence would do much _goodness_ in this world."

"Whoa Sasha; that was brutal … and yet very much deserved on Daisy's part." Said Eddie as he clapped for his friend. "You really don't take crap lying down huh?"

"What can I say? I have a sneaky side." Smirked Sasha. "Normally I wouldn't have done that … but c'mon, I bet you all wanted to do that as well."

"Agreed." Said Eddie.

"Same here." Said Irene.

"Err, yeah, I think so." Mumbled Carlton. "Though I don't like blue jelly."

"A waste of jelly but I would as well." Nodded Gary looking amused at what had happened.

"Looks like we didn't even have to read the fan mail." Said Sasha as she looked at a sack behind her chair.

"More like hate mail." Chuckled Eddie.

"Since Daisy is gone and more than likely won't be back for the rest of the show … shall we move onto the next guest?" Asked Sasha.

"Sounds like a plan." Agreed Eddie as he gestured to the left of the stage. "Our next guest is stronger than super glue, defrosted the ice queen known as Xaria, had a bitter feud with Kasimar and was voted off due to being a threat. Please give a round of applause for Oscar!"

Oscar walked out from backstage and waved to the audience as they cheered with absolutely no boos. Oscar took a seat on the guest chair and shook Eddie and Sasha's hands.

"Hey guys; I saw what you did to Daisy from backstage … nice." Complimented Oscar.

"She had it coming." Shrugged Sasha.

"Agreed." Said Oscar.

"So Oscar; you made the merge. Congratulations are in order." Said Eddie. "Too bad you were voted off shortly after; but I think it is because you were viewed as a threat."

"That's probably right; I'm not dumb or anything but I'm definitely stronger than I am smart. I mean; I carried an unconscious bear on my back." Said Oscar proudly. "I would have probably won the boot camp challenge if it hadn't been for the essay about Chris. If it had been an essay on why I hate him I'd have passed easily."

"I think we all would have." Said Eddie. "Though if I was to ever compete I would prefer to give a boot camp challenge a miss."

"Writing is hard!" Whined Patch. "I always hold the pencil the wrong way! And the teacher yells at me when I eat it! No fair!"

"You're not supposed to eat pencils." Said Vinnie. "Stick to doughnuts."

"Okey dokey pokey!" Said Patch dumbly as he burped.

"He would make a great meat shield! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace like a maniac.

"Meat? Yummy!" Exclaimed Patch.

"Moving on." Said Sasha quickly. "One of the most noticeable things about you Oscar while you were on the Island is the extreme conflict between you and Kasimar; care to elaborate on that?"

"Oh man; where do I even begin? Well first of all is the extreme negative aura that seems to follow Kasimar wherever he goes. He's sexist, he's homophobic, he's a complete bully, he seriously injured Gary and Raven … and let's not forget how much he enjoys making people cry. In short … he's a complete monster." Said Oscar with a frown. "If it weren't for Raven's injury he would have been long gone and sitting in the peanut gallery."

"At least my leg feels a lot better now." Said Raven. "Just have faith in the 'winds of change', remember how you said about them in the animal wrangling challenge?"

"Oh yeah, that's right." Remembered Oscar.

"You know; even though Tabitha is allied with Kasimar … she doesn't trust him." Said Eddie. "In her confessionals she has mentioned backstabbing him eventually."

"His downfall wouldn't be as satisfying if another nasty person did it." Sighed Oscar. "It would be better if one of his bullying targets defeated him."

"Poetic justice." Said Zita as she sat with his legs crossed on her peanut gallery seat. "Personally I'd like for him to end up in a wheelchair permanently … but I'm no sadist like Chris."

"Chris is a complete jackass." Agreed Hector. "He gives all Canadians a very bad name."

"Chris and Kasimar are as bad as each other … and by that I mean they are even worse than mass murderers from the past." Said Vinnie. "I'd like to shave Chris's hair off."

"And once he's bald we'll sell the pictures to every newspaper in Canada because Chris would edit the footage out and wear a wig." Finished Eddie.

"And then we'd laugh at him." Added Gary.

"So Oscar; since Kasimar is obviously your far and away least favorite team mate … who was your favorite team mate?" Asked Sasha.

"…I think everybody here can easily figure that one out." Replied Oscar.

"Irene." Guessed Patch.

"I wasn't on Oscar's team." Said Irene in dry amusement.

"I stand thoroughly corrected; most people could figure it out but not all. Any other guesses?"

"I think you liked Xaria the most." Said Carlton nervously.

"Yep; she's one of the nicest people you could meet … provided you take the time to get to know her." Said Oscar. "I voted for her on day one and I regret that now … but things have worked out just fine."

"I'm sorry … but I have to ask this." Said Eddie very seriously. "Is Xaria a good kisser?"

Oscar blinked.

"In only one word … totally." Said Oscar in slight embarrassment.

"Looks like you're opinion on Xaria has completely changed since the first day huh?" Smiled Sasha.

"When I first met Xaria I thought she was kind of irritable and grouchy and just liked to complain about nothing important … but over time you could say that I've gotten used to her and quite frankly, despite her slightly negative outer shell … inside she's as sweet as a mix of honey, doughnuts and sugar."

"What an interesting metaphor." Giggled Sasha. "It's as if the whole point of this season was to not judge somebody before you know them; quite an important moral lesson in my opinion."

"What would you say was your best moment on the island?" Asked Eddie.

"Probably either when I sang to Xaria or when myself and Xaria force fed Wallace his own tainted star fruit." Said Oscar as he glanced at Wallace.

"I can still taste it every now and then! It won't go away! Ack!" Gagged Wallace. "But well played … yet evil villains are much harder to squash than cockroaches! Mwuhahahahahahahahahaha!"

"Do you want some cheese with that wine?" Asked Oscar in a snarky voice. "Heh; looks like Xaria's snarkyness is rubbing off on me."

"One last question before we move onto the fan mail." Said Eddie. "Who do you want to win the million?"

"Xaria." Replied Oscar promptly. "Though if not Xaria I wouldn't mind Eleanor winning either. As long as Kasimar, Nakia and Tabitha get what's coming to them and lose I have no problem with who wins."

"Hmm; interesting." Said Sasha as she picked up a large sack of mail from behind her chair. "You were quite a popular contestant due to your feud with Kasimar and your good sportsmanship so a lot of people have written to you."

"Coo; can't say I'm not curious as to what people think of me." Smiled Oscar as Sasha opened the first letter.

"This one…" Sasha trailed off and sighed. "Why do we keep getting weightwatchers letters? Oscar is the exact opposite of the letters intended recipient!"

Sasha tore the letter up and threw the shredded remains over her shoulder and behind her head as she took out another letter.

"Ok; To Oscar; are you going in the Olympics in the future? You're definitely strong enough! If train pulling was an event you would definitely win the gold metal. From Ludwig." Read Sasha.

"Ludwig was the musician of evil! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly as always.

"Well yeah; the Olympics are something I'd like to do; I'd rather do weight lifting, I'm not sure if I could pull a train … depends what type of train it is really. Though I'm flattered somebody thinks I could do that." Said Oscar as he began to daydream about representing Canada in the Olympics.

"Stay in reality Oscar, we've got more fan mail to get through." Said Sasha as she opened a second letter. "Ok; this one if from Insaneoinkoink the 1st, strange nickname. He or she writes; Dear Oscar, if you could decide how Kasimar gets eliminated from the game, what would you do to him?"

Oscar smirked darkly.

"I can't say the answer on television … but it would involve a cactus, a croquet mallet and three gallons of tar." Said Oscar. "I'll leave it at that."

"Something tells me I'd rather not find out what you would do." Mumbled Raven.

"I think that might be a good idea." Agreed Gary with his girlfriend.

"Ok; we have time for one more letter." Said Sasha as she took a third letter from the sack and opened it. "Dear Oscar; I know you don't take steroids … so how on earth are you so bloody strong? Please tell me your secret!"

"Easy answer; I work out a lot and I don't gorge myself excessively and junk food … I also don't laze around." Explained Oscar. "Just don't go overboard like Spider; building muscles and losing weight is a very delicate procedure. And besides; steroids are for losers and cheaters."

"Very true." Agreed Eddie. "If anybody used steroids in series competition they should be banned from competing for a fixed time at least."

"Exactly." Said Oscar.

"I agree; it makes it completely unfair for everyone else; cheaters don't deserve medals." Said Vinnie.

"Well Oscar; that's all the time we have for your interview and we still have two more people to talk to before the show ends so could you join the peanut gallery?" Asked Sasha.

"Sure thing Sasha." Said Oscar as he got up from the interviewee armchair and sat on the peanut gallery sofa next to Vinnie.

"Time for our next guest." Said Eddie. "And very unfortunately she left the show with an injury."

"Join the club; we have jackets." Muttered Gary. "Say; when Kasimar is on the show can we use the chair to electrocute him?"

"Good idea; I'll keep that in mind." Said Eddie as he turned to the audience and gestured once more to the left of the stage. "Our next guest likes eating healthy, fell in love with Andy, was a tough girl as well as a good friend and also she has blue hair, because apparently you gotta have blue hair! Let's give it up for Mable!"

The audience cheered as Mable walked out from backstage on crutches; she had a cast on her right leg. She slowly sat down in the chair and relaxed.

"Hi everyone." Waved Mable to her friends.

"You ok Mable?" Asked Sasha sounding concerned. "You had a really serious injury when you got eliminated; I don't think anyone else's injuries made them bleed."

"I'm fine now; sure it hurts a bit, but even with my pain and the fact I lose I'm still able to call my time on Total Drama Letterz a victory." Said Mable with a shy happy smile.

"Love makes everything better I guess." Smiled Oscar. "Most of the time."

"I'd have rather lost a different way than I did … but you can't change the past as time machines haven't been invented and if they were they'd be made illegal in one and a half seconds tops. And you can't win them all." Said Mable positively. "Though the million would have been nice."

"How many people is Kasimar going to hurt until he gets the prize?" Asked Hector out loud.

"As many as he wants I bet." Said Yessica sounding glum.

"For every yang there's a yin." Said Mable. "Good will always rise against evil like in World War Two or when King K, Rool stole Donkey Kong's banana hoard."

"I love evil! Being evil rocks more than a boulder! And boulders are evil! Mwahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace as he pressed a button on his remote and lighting struck somewhere outside.

"Wallace's 'evil' laughter gives me a headache." Mumbled Irene.

"That's the point! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace again.

"Ok; first question." Said Eddie to change the subject. "Did you like the team you ended up on?"

"It was pretty good as we were the strongest team pre-merge as we won the most challenges." Said Mable as he reflected on her time on the crazy reality show. "Lavender was my best friend though Xaria and Raven were really nice as well. Kasimar's a horrible person with no soul, enough said. Wallace is just plain batshit insane. Carlton's not so bad though he is scared of some silly things … no offense Carlton."

"None taken." Said Carlton. "Though things like snakes are pretty scary."

"Agreed." Said Zita. "Though some countries consider them delicacies."

"Then again junk food scares me … so I'm … not really one to talk … am I?" Chuckled Mable sheepishly. "Still; I faced my fear in the phobia challenge, with help from Andy of course."

"I'm glad I wasn't there for that challenge." Whimpered Carlton.

"That's quite understandable." Said Fifi sympathetically.

"Kasimar was the one who was directly responsible for your injury and resulting elimination; but Tabitha had told him to hurt you. Who would you say is more to blame?" Asked Sasha.

"Well Kasimar was the one who set the bumper power to maximum and Tabitha seemed genuinely horrified in the confession when I watched the rerun. However; Tabitha was blackmailing Andy and had told Kasimar to hurt me in the first place … I'd say both are to blame." Answered Mable. "Tabitha is truly horrid but to be honest I kinda think Kasimar is even worse."

"Same here." Said Fifi. "I never really interacted with him … but he's a demon alright."

"I think they're both wicked monsters." Said Vinnie with an angry but understandable frown.

"So Mable; what attracts you most about Andy?" Asked Sasha with a sudden sly smirk. "Sever thought of being Mrs. Takeshi hmm?"

"What?" Said Mable blushing as red as red paper.

"I was just joking, relax." Laughed Sasha.

"Oh hardy har haar." Said Mable still looking very embarrassed.

"What Sasha means to say is are you happy being with Andy?" Asked Eddie with a look of amusement on his face.

Mable looked more relaxed and smiled.

"Well; to put it simply … I am happy being with him." Giggled Mable with a swoon. "He's kind, he stands up to his oppressors, he's brave and he's hot. And that's only four reasons of many. He just makes me feel so happy."

"Now you know how I feel." Giggled Raven as she smiled at Gary.

"Care for a double date with me and Raven?" Asked Gary with a wiggle of his unibrow.

"Err … next question please!" Asked Mable.

"Ok then; why did you die your hair blue? Why not green or red?" Asked Eddie.

"Blue is my favorite color; and I think it's a cute hairstyle." Explained Mable with a smile.

"But it's so ironic." Said Eddie.

"How exactly?" Asked Mable sounding confused.

"Well; you like healthy food … and blue is the most unhealthy food coloring, it's why blue smarties got removed for a while." Explained Eddie.

Mable was silent for a few moments and blinked twice.

"…You're right; that _is_ ironic. I never thought of it like that." Said Mable sounding impressed.

"Well I'm a detective; these sorts of things some naturally to me." Shrugged Eddie with a smile.

"The irony of her hair color would never have occurred to me." Admitted Oscar.

"Nor me." Agreed Vinnie.

"One more question." Said Sasha. "Who do you want to see win Total Drama Letterz?"

"Definitely Andy." Replied Mable promptly. "If not Andy then either Lavender or Xaria."

"I thought you'd say that." Smiled Eddie as he took out a sizable bag of fan mail. "You've got a fair few fans it seems; would you like to hear what the fans have to say to you?"

"Sounds fun; go ahead." Smiled Mable.

"Ok; let's get started then." Said Eddie as he opened an envelope and began to read the letter. "To Mable; be a good girl and flash your sexy blue panties for me. From HornyHunk64 … I think I should rip that one up."

Eddie tore up the envelope and stomped on the little pieces that remained while Mable looked embarrassed.

"There is no fudging way I'd flash my panties for somebody I didn't even know!" Said Mable sounding both affronted and embarrassed.

"Would you for Andy?" Teased Irene.

"…Next letter please." Requested Mable as she blushed in even more embarrassment than before.

"Right away." Said Eddie as he opened a second letter. "This one is from somebody called Lisa Brianne Spanky. Snrrrrk!" Sniggered Eddie. "Ok; she says. Dear Mable; I don't like you! Your name is ridiculous and you can't force your eating beliefs on people. You suck! Ok; that coming from a girl who's surname is Spanky, seriously?"

Eddie tore up the letter and took out another one; he opened it and silently read through it to make sure it was nice and he nodded to himself in satisfaction.

"This one seems pretty nice. Dear Mable; you sure are a role model. You don't take crap from anyone and you're a tough and responsible gal. When you were eliminated I threw the orange I was eating at the TV screen. If ever meet Kasimar on the street I'll make him sorry. Good job on getting as far as you did; good job indeed! Cheers and smiley faces! From Annabelle." Read Eddie; he neatly folded up the letter and passed it to Mable when he was done.

"That was a nice letter; much better than 'Mrs. Spanky's' letter." Said Mable sounding happy. "I like having fans; it's a warm fuzzy feeling Kasimar will never ever experience."

"I don't think Daisy or Nakia will have that feeling either." Said Carlton.

"What about Tabitha?" Asked Yessica.

"I somehow think she may have fans; don't know why but I just think so." Said Carlton before gulping. "And Tabitha kinda scares me."

"And that's all the time we have for you Mable; it's been fun talking with you." Said Sasha. "We still need to interview one more guest tonight. And can somebody on the bottom row move up for Mable?"

Carlton got up and moved to the middle row of the large sofa (though not the top as he was scared of heights) which allowed Mable to sit on the bottom row. Eddie and Sasha turned to the camera.

"We still have one more guest left to interview tonight." Said Sasha with a cheerful smile.

"Though personally I'd have rather interviewed her in the last episode as I was really rooting for her." Said Eddie with slight regret before smiling like Sasha.

"Our last guest is autistic, has an emo doll, is sadistic but a real sweetie, was manipulated by she devil Tabitha, has a love of almost all horror movies and is currently in a steady relationship with Vinnie … give a big round of applause for Uzuri!"

Uzuri walked out from backstage as the audience broke out into a thunderous applause. Vinnie clapped as well. Uzuri waved to the audience and sat down in the interviewee chair.

"Hello everyone!" Waved Uzuri with a big smile. "Say, do I know you two?"

"I don't think so since you only arrived at the playa about an hour ago." Said Eddie. "Allow me to introduce myself, I'm Eddie Lynmoire."

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Said Sasha. "I'm pleased to meet you."

"It's always nice to meet people even if most of them are scared of me." Said Uzuri while keeping her sunny smile. "And a fair few of them label me as a freak."

"You're not a freak." Assured Vinnie kindly. "You're sweet and special."

"Thanks Vinnie" Said Uzuri with a playful wink.

"So Uzuri; where to begin? You has quite an interesting time on wawanakwa huh?" Asked Eddie.

"It was an emotional rollercoaster with no emergency brake; I laughed, I cried, I loved and I got angry." Giggled Uzuri cheerfully. "But despite the emotional blows … I'm glad I came on this show; I fell in love, I have several good friends and I overall feel a lot happier than I did than before I arrived."

"But you almost always seemed really happy." Said Sasha.

"I wear the mask well." Said Uzuri spookily before sighing. "As I said during my emotional … blow up, on day twelve, back home I don't have friends and everyone avoids me … it's kind of depressing really."

"Ah phooey to them; they didn't bother to get to know you and they'll regret that someday." Said Vinnie to support his girlfriend.

"You flatterer." Giggled Uzuri.

"I'm sorry to ask this question Uzuri … but; did you have any idea that Tabitha was using you?" Asked Eddie hesitantly.

Uzuri frowned; despite being angry and upset she kinda looked cute.

"I had no idea; I thought she was a true friend, somebody who was there for me once Vinnie was gone as well as being a nice person and helping me out … boy was I wrong!" Said Uzuri sounding upset. "She's nothing but a backstabbing soulless monster who would feel right at home in hell. Vinnie told me about what she said in confessional about me … how _could_ she?"

"Some people are, to put it in a simple way, complete bastards." Said Hector. "You're not alone in disliking Tabitha Uzuri, trust me."

"I'm sorry I helped get you eliminated Hector." Said Uzuri sounding sincere.

"No problem; Tabitha is the one to blame." Smiled Hector.

"So it's fairly safe to assume that any positive feelings you had about Tabitha are gone then." Said Sasha.

"Yes." Said Uzuri flatly and creepily.

"Let's move on to a nicer question; something that we'll enjoy listening to." Suggested Eddie. "Uzuri; what are your thoughts on your relationship with Vinnie?"

Uzuri's frown was instantly turned upside down and she grinned huge.

"Where to start? He's kind, he's got a nice hat, he's hot as a jalapeño, he comforts me when I'm upset … and between you, me and the entire viewing world he's such a cutesy wootsy woo! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri.

Everyone either 'awwwwwwed' or simply laughed while Vinnie blushed, groaned and pulled his hat over his face in embarrassment.

"Yep; he's such a good boyfriend." Continued Uzuri. "When I was suffering emotional stress or getting bullied by Chris McCraphead he was always there for me."

"I wonder why Chris didn't like you." Said Irene aloud sounding confused. "What did you do to him?"

"He's just a prejudiced asshole of a bully like Kasimar except even uglier." Said Gary. "He thinks he is cool but he is not; his ego is even bigger than all of Asia."

"I think everyone here can agree with that; am I right?" Asked Sasha.

A chorus of yes's sounded from the audience.

"One thing I'm curious about Uzuri." Began Eddie. "You are a big fan of horror movies such A Nightmare on Elm Street and SAW … yet you despise Human Centipede; while I agree the movie is horrible, I'm just curious why you don't like it when you like all the others."

"Stitching people together and cutting their bodies for no real reason isn't my idea of humor; it's just _sick_." Gagged Uzuri in disgust. "Jigsaw and Freddie had back stories and reasons and the victims had personalities … but the Human Centipede victims are just there to be stitched, nothing more and nothing less. It just makes me feel sick."

"I completely agree." Said Eddie.

"As do I." Said Sasha.

"That movie sounds so horrible." Whimpered Carlton as he covered his eyes with his hands and shivered

"I don't blame you for being scared Carlton buddy." Said Yessica with equally extreme unease.

"I'd like to move the conversation onwards." Sais Sasha nervously. "So Uzuri; what's your favorite color?"

"Pink." Responded Uzuri quickly with a sunny smile. "It reminds me of milkshakes and brings out my girly side as surprisingly to some I am a girl. In fact, my panties and bra are pink … Doh! I said that in my audition too … old habits die hard I guess."

"As well as some fan service." Giggled Irene.

"According to the websites forum Lavender and Quana supply that." Said Mable. "Probably because of the truth or dare game if anyone remembers."

"I think everyone who is male remembers." Sniggered Zita.

"How do you pronounce scary girls name?" Asked Patch whilst looking like he had a big headache.

"Simple; 'Yugh-Zer-Ey'" Said Uzuri. "Funny how there are a lot of unusual U names like Ulysses and Umi isn't it?"

"Only eleven people are left in the competition now." Said Eddie. "Out of the remaining eleven who do you want to win the competition Uzuri?"

"Hmm; tough question ... umm … I got it!" Said Uzuri with her funny serious face. "Probably Spider because he was nice to me and he suffers from prejudice just like I do."

"Prejudice is terrible." Said Oscar. "Not an acceptable thing in this day and age."

"I'll say." Agreed Irene.

"Same here." Agreed Fifi.

"Before we wrap up the show I think we have time for some fan mail." Said Sasha as she hauled a large sack of letters addressed to Uzuri from behind her armchair. "You're a very popular contestant Uzuri; I myself am curious to hear what people think of you."

"It had better not be insults." Said Vinnie.

"Only one way to find out." Giggled Uzuri as she looked at the large mail sack.

"True; let's read some mail." Said Sasha as she opened the first letter she took from the sack. "This one is from Mandy. Dear Uzuri; you're a strong and unique individual girl. You'll most definitely be spared when the old gods destroy the world! Do you have any pet rats? If so I'd like to meet them. Rats are the minions of Chthulu! Hmm; she seemed a little odd … but nice all the same just like you."

"I don't have any rats." Admitted Uzuri. "I don't have any pets at all. But maybe one day… but that was a nice letter."

"Hopefully the next one will be nice as well." Said Sasha as she opened the envelope of the second letter. "This one is from Gus. He says, Dear Uzuri; you have an almost complete immunity to pain right? Besides AMPS, what else hurts you?"

"Well; off the top of my head, besides AMPS, I can name cuts, choking and explosions … I stepped a little too close to a firework once and got hit. I was unharmed but it did hurt a little. I guess you could say those things are my kryptonite."

"Are you a fan of superman?" Asked Eddie.

"Not really but everyone who's anyone knows who superman is, right?" Said Uzuri as she twiddled her toes a little.

"We're nearly out of time; but I think we have just enough time on the air left for one more letter." Said Sasha as she opened a third letter from the confines of its envelope. "This one is from Oswald. He says, Dear Uzuri; you are unique and that's awesome. The world could use more people like you; unusual and not afraid to admit it as well as being sunny and full of fun! I expect great things from you in this contest and if you don't win I'm sure you'll get invited to talk shows once the season ends. Kick Kasimar's butt! Nice letter; its good to see not everyone is like Tabitha, Nakia or Kasimar."

"The terrible trio! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly for little to no reason

"Can I have that letter? I'd like to write that Oswald guy back." Smiled Uzuri cheerfully.

"Sure." Said Sasha as she handed Uzuri the letter.

"And on that bombshell … we're out of time!" Said Eddie. "It has been quite an episode; we've had five guests and Daisy has been completely humiliated. It looks like despite all the recent bad occurrences everything has worked out after all."

"Join us in a couple of episodes down the line; we'll have more contestants to interview and a whole bunch of surprises." Said Sasha.

"Until then though I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Saluted Eddie.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Waved Sasha.

"And see you next time." Said both teens in usion.

"And cut!" Said a cameraman. "And we're off the air; god job you two."

The audience began to disperse as the interns shut off the stage lights. The eliminated campers and Eddie and Sasha left to go to their rooms or grab a late night snack. Vinnie and Uzuri were left alone on stage after a few moments.

"What a day." Said Uzuri. "I've been backstabbed, voted off and reunited with my boyfriend. After all this a good night's sleep sounds very tempting. Could you show me to my room Vinnie?"

"Yeah; about that … I forget to tell you that … you're bunking with me." Said Vinnie with a slight blush. "You see; Gary and Raven are sharing a room and I thought you might like to- mpph!"

Uzuri had interrupted Vinnie with a kiss and when they parted she smiled.

"You know me so well … and I like that! Lead the way cutie!" Giggled Uzuri.

* * *

Looks like despite everything Uzuri has a happy ending; Tabitha may not be her friend but she still has plenty of others. Sniff … I just LOVE a happy ending!

Next Time: I hope you've been paying attention to the series so far because its time for a big continuity nod … a trivia quiz!"


	41. Day 19, Part 1, Prepare your memories

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his alphabetical masterpiece Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story and I would like it if you respect my ownership and thus do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains some heart warming moments, a torture chair, bullying, intolerance, bribery, a bit of getting crap past the radar and a sadistic and immature bumbling host. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Crag's interesting fact: **Uzuri's dislike of the movie 'Human Centipede' comes from my own absolute disgust of it. I thankfully haven't seen it (nor will I **ever**) but after reading a simple brief description of it I felt like being sick. If you haven't seen the movie you should consider yourselves very lucky my friends.

**Note: **Forty one chapters are done. If my math is right then the story's chapter total is sixty three; that means only twenty two chapters remain! We're started to enter the home stretch people! The final ten is RIGHT around the corner. I am aiming to have at least a hundred reviews by the end of this story so if you like it a review would be nice.

Thanks to everyone who has read the story up to this point; we still have a bit of a way to go but your support keeps this story going. Now, you came here for a cheap laugh and cheap laughs you shall receive! Let's light the fuse on this cannon of a chapter!

I like trains…

* * *

It was morning on Wawanakwa; around nine in the morning, breakfast time to be precise. Chris stood on the dock of shame drinking his favorite drink, a latté, and waved to the camera as the smooth waves rolled up on the Island's beach.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz! It was a fun challenge for the final twelve that was guaranteed to put more green in the blue; the green being dollars and the blue being my pants! Haha! Well; actually it should be green in the green … but whatever! The twelve remaining campers had to cosplay as many famous video game characters. We saw beloved favorites like Mario, Sonic and Albert Wesker. Though there were also some characters most of us don't like such as Waluigi and Tom nook … and when I researched Tom Nook on Lavender's suggestion I was surprised with what I found…"

Chris shuddered for a moment but quickly resumed his smile and pressed onwards with the recap.

"While the campers were getting changed we got a few laughs. Kasimar made fun of the atomic bomb incident … and because Andy is Japanese he got pissed. Hilarious! Haha! But also we learned that Tabitha has a scar on her back; she claims she got it from a gardening accident but in the confessional she says she was lying … but who the #bleep# cares? Haha!"

"Like in the pinball challenge I picked the order the campers were going by picking coins with their faces on them out of a hat. I've said it before and I'll say it again; fairness it really bad for ratings! Gah! Well; at least we had a heck of a lot of drama during the rest of episode."

"Some of the cosplay acts were awful like Uzuri and Xaria … but others were good; well, they sucked the least anyway. All but four campers humiliated themselves for nothing as only four could win immunity. Jimmy, Nakia, Barney and Kasimar managed to pull of a victory with Jimmy coming in first place and winning a cat costume … though he didn't like it too much … sucks to be that idiot! Haha!"

"After the challenge when Tabitha went to talk with Kasimar and Nakia to decide who to vote off it seemed that her allies had suffered a bad case of Chromic Backstabbing Disorder. They threatened to expose her if she didn't get rid of Uzuri as the creepy freaky blond bitch had been annoying them unintentionally. Tabitha relented and agreed to backstab her."

"The next scene has got to have been the very best part of the season so far; Tabitha backstabbed Uzuri and made her cry! I've recorded it and put it on YouTube already; that'll teach Uzuri for being such a freak! Haha!"

"At the Bonfire Ceremony it came down to Lavender and Uzuri; it was a win-win situation either way. Lavender got the final marshmallow and Uzuri was sent packing. Good riddance! Haha! Andy managed to say goodbye and promised to take down Tabitha. Good luck with that! Haha!"

"Much to my dismay Uzuri didn't brutally kill herself! Instead Vinnie was on the boat and apparently he comforted her and all ended up well. Where the #bleep# is the drama in that? Hmm? Huh? Well; very sadly I couldn't do anything about it."

"Only eleven campers remain in the game now; nine from the beginning and two returnees. Who will be the next to bite the dust? What will Tabitha's next move in the game be? Do you remember who was the fourth to arrive on the deck on the first day? And do you remember what Wallace put in Nakia's snooker ball in the human snooker challenge? Find out right now in a very 'trivial' episode of Total Drama Letterz!

(Theme song, I wanna be famous).

* * *

Spider, Quana, Eleanor and Jimmy were eating breakfast in the mess hall … well; it was breaking their appetites fast anyway. The food was worse than usual due to Chris cutting the food budget even more so he could indulge his hair with expensive hair gel. Spider gagged and dropped his spoon as he took a bite of a slimy yet crunchy grey 'thing' on his plate.

"I wonder if going on a hunger strike *cough* would make Chris put more money into the *cough* food budget." Pondered Spider. "This food tastes worse than that *gag* crayon sandwich Ollie forced me to eat a *cough* few months ago lest he'd break both my arms."

"…What?" Said Quana sounding both shocked and angered. "Was this Ollie guy a bully or just a prick?"

"A bully; the whole crayon sandwich earned *cough* me a whole month in the intensive care ward *sneeze* at hospital." Said Spider glumly. "I'm just unable to stand up to *cough* bullies it seems."

* * *

**Confessional: If you can't stand up then why not sit down?**

**Spider: I must come across as the ***cough* **biggest wimp on the show … except for ***cough* **Carlton … maybe.**

**Quana: When I visit Spider after the show I now know a certain bully I'm going to have a **_**little**_** talking too. **(Quana glares at the camera as though to the bully).

* * *

"I'm about as weak physically as *cough* SpongeBob." Said Spider as he took a deep breath with his inhaler. "It's no big wonder I'm *cough* a social reject back home."

"Shhhhhhh; don't put yourself down." Whispered Quana soothingly. "We've got to work on these insecurities of yours."

"It's easy for you to *cough* say my lovely; you don't have two *cough* people who want you dead. Also you're not a *cough* so called germ sponge." Said Spider as he glanced at his food and pushed it away.

"You're illness doesn't bother me in the slightest." Assured Quana. "Would I have ever made out with you if I disliked your germs?"

"Quana…" Blushed Spider.

"Hey; I'm just telling the truth." Giggled Quana slyly. "Besides; I have problems too. Kasimar keeps sexually harassing me and just won't back off … and Nakia is like an even more annoying version of Lisa Simpson tenfold."

"I never liked *cough* Lisa Simpson either." Agreed Spider.

Spider and Quana were silent for a moment as they glanced at the food that was supposed to be breakfast.

"I'd like to order Chinese food instead of eating this crud." Murmured Quana.

"At least it's better than at *cough* the start of the competition." Said Spider as he attempted to look on the bright side. "And boy; such a lot of stuff has *cough* happened since the beginning that it feels almost like an eternity."

"The boat race." Recalled Quana.

"Winning immunity in the first challenge." Remembered Spider.

"Andy's injury in the talent show." Flinched Quana.

"Meeting you." Both said simultaneously with a blush.

"We seem to have quite a lot in common don't we?" Smiled Quana.

"Enough that we unintentionally speak in usion." Pointed out Spider.

The two teens looked at each other for 1.542 seconds before they leaned in and smooched.

* * *

**Confessional: My first girlfriend cheated on me with my dad!**

**Spider: **(He looks a little spaced out and just grins and chuckles).

**Quana: Though this show is run by a madman and has some pretty unpleasant people on it … spending time with Spider seems to make all the pain just go away.**

* * *

As Spider and Quana smooched a little and began talking again jimmy glanced at them from the other end of the table.

"There has sure been a lot of unusual yet cute hook ups, right Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy as he pushed his sickly gross breakfast away.

"True; so far there has been a sick guy and a singer, a pirate and a cheerleader, a creepy sweetie and a guy with a metal arm, the list goes on." Agreed Eleanor.

"This whole show has been both fun and at the same time more brutal than the time I and the guys got tricked by Earl into racing across town for a prize of a thousand dollars last summer." Said Jimmy in remembrance. "Still; it wasn't all bad."

"What happened?" Asked Eleanor while thinking it couldn't be any good.

"The five of us were paired up by Earl into teams of two because five other kids in the neighborhood joined in. We raced across town … and I ended up in the sewer." Flinched Jimmy. "Turns out it was all a prank by Earl for his own sick amusement and there was no prize."

"So then what did you do?" Asked Eleanor sounding interested.

"All ten of us beat the ever loving crud out of Earl and Ted nicked a thousand dollars from Earls wallet; a hundred for each of us. And after the amount of bullying he gave us over the summer I think it was justifiable. He hasn't bugged us since." Explained Jimmy. "Though our parents found out about the money and that Earl had stolen it in the first place so it was given to the police. Still; it's the principle of it all that matters I suppose."

"I wonder what you and your friends are going to do next. Sneak into a girls only slumber party dressed in drag?" Joked Eleanor.

"We actually did that once." Admitted Jimmy sheepishly. "Pablo and I were the only ones to come off completely unscathed."

* * *

**Confessional: Panty raid! Oh wait; you're a kid so I guess not.**

**Jimmy: That really wasn't one of Ted's better ideas … then again most of his so called 'hair brained schemes' are more like 'knuckleheaded shenanigans' … but still; he's my friend.**

**Eleanor: Jimmy's home life reminds me of Phineas and Ferb … expect it isn't completely stupid like that show. Jimmy's nice; and with mean people like Kasimar, Chris and Nakia on the prowl that's exactly what this show needs.**

* * *

"Well Jimmy; it's the final eleven, only ten more days and the contest is over." Said Eleanor as she tapped her fingers on the table. "How good do you think your chances of winning the contest are?"

"I think I have a shot … but if the final challenge is based on physical strength I'll have two hopes … bob hope and no hope." Said Jimmy. "I'm not very good at physical challenges though acting is something I'm pretty good at; I think you have a pretty good chance too though."

"Thanks; I could use a million dollars … but so could everyone I suppose." Chuckled Eleanor. "But I just can't wrap my head around how Kasimar had gotten so from and avoided his karma for so long."

"It's because he was on a strong team and somebody always drew negative attention away from him." Said Jimmy in thought of the scary bully. "Not only that but as much I really, _really_ hate to admit it he's a strong competitor … a lot stronger than me."

"What you lack in muscles you make up for with heart." Smiled Eleanor. "You are one thing Kasimar could never be in a trillion billion million years."

"What's that?" Asked Jimmy sounding eager top know.

"A true friend." Replied Eleanor.

"Right back at'cha Eleanor." Replied Jimmy while making pointy motions with his hands.

"Yesterday's challenge was too tame for Chris's usual standard." Said Eleanor suspiciously. "I dread what he's planning for us today."

"Maybe he'll have us fish for sharks … and we'll be the bait!" Gulped Jimmy.

"Just be brave and show him that you can't be pushed around; you saw how he treated poor Uzuri." Said Eleanor sadly for a moment. "And I don't want you becoming Chris's next target."

"Aye, aye captain!" Said Jimmy with a smile.

Both kids started laughing as the vomit inducing breakfast lay completely forgotten.

* * *

**Confessional: Toy ships always sink on the real ocean.**

**Jimmy: Out of all my twenty five opponents in this crazy competition I'd say Eleanor is my best friend. What can I say; she's sweet. Kinda like jelly beans except she's a lot taller than an inch or so.**

**Eleanor: Jimmy has some sort of cheerful aura around him that makes other people feel happy as well. He's kind of like the Title character of the book Polly-Anna … isn't 'The Polly-Anna' Jimmy's stereotype in this contest? Very fitting.**

**Chris: I hate kids! They smell like smelly cabbage! Bah humbug! **(Chris crosses his arms and grumbles to himself).

* * *

Barney and Lavender had been talking to each other on Lavenders bed … well; at least they HAD been. Currently Barney had other motives in mind.

"Hahahahahaha! Mercy!" laughed Lavender in hysterics.

Barney was currently using a feather from his pirate hat to tickle the underside of Lavender's left foot; he had managed to get a hold of Lavender's left ankle after they started kissing. All Lavender could do now was laugh and beg for mercy despite that she was enjoying the tickle torture though she would never ever admit that to anybody.

"Mercy! Hahahahaha! Help!" Laughed Lavender as her cheeks started to turn pink from all the laughter.

"Say it!" Chuckled Barney.

"No; I can't!" Said Lavender as she continued laughing.

Barney gave Lavender a playful tragic look.

"Then I'm afraid I must continue mermaid." Said Barney solemnly before grinning his signature genki grin.

"Hahahahahahaha! Ok! Ok! I'll do it!" Said Lavender in surrender. "Yaaaar! You be a manly man of a pirate me heartie!"

"All done!" Said Barney promptly as he released Lavender's foot; Lavender took deep breaths as her left foot recovered from the tickle torture.

"I should have _**never**_ told you I was ticklish on the soles of my feet." Said Lavender as she slipped on her sock and shoe.

"C'mon; who doesn't enjoy laughing to the point of asphyxiation?" Asked Barney with a knowing smirk.

"…You're crazy." Mumbled Lavender with a smile.

"And I'm darn sexy too." Added Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: What do I have to do to be sexy? Wear a leather jacket or something? Huh? Huh?**

**Barney: I am not only a master at love but I am … a tickle ninja! Yohohohohoho! **

**Lavender: **(He has a hand over her face and is shaking her head). **I have a strong feeling that the rest of the cheerleading squad back home is going to repeatedly bring that moment up after the show is over.**

* * *

"So Lavender me mermaid; we're nearing the end of the contest; how about that eh?" Said Barney as he and Lavender exited Lavender's cabin and began to walk around camp. "I'm have a good feeling about my chances of winning."

"I have that very same feeling." Smiled Lavender. "But what if both of us end up in the final two? I wouldn't really want to compete against you and stop you from winning a million dollars."

"Hmm … we could always purposely cross the line at the exact same time and Chris will have no choice but to declare us both winners and award us five hundred thousand dollars each." Suggested Barney. "Ties are cool … and they make you fit in at a business convention savvy?"

"…You're as unique as a snowflake, you know that Barney?" Asked Lavender with a sweet smile at her boyfriend.

"Well I have been called eccentrically original before." Said Barney modestly. "Now; how do you feel about skipping breakfast? I feel it is a wee bit too toxic for me to consume."

"Once again, I have that exact same feeling." Agreed Lavender. "I think eating the crappy food will put us in worse shape for the challenge. Speaking of challenge; what do you think we'll be doing?"

"Having our hair pulled out; last one to scream wins immunity." Shuddered Barney. "Still; it would give that she devil of the waves Nakia a bit of well deserved karma."

"I don't like her either … then again, does _anyone_ like that brat?"

"I think Tabitha tolerates her a wee bit." Said Barney as he thought back to the competition so far. "But Tabitha is nice to everyone really so I'm not entirely sure that it actually counts yaaar."

* * *

**Confessional: They don't suspect a thing do they?**

**Barney: Who says all aristocrats have to be evil? Well; Nakia is … but Tabitha seems as solid as a cannon ball me hearties.**

* * *

"So what do we do until the next challenge?" Asked Lavender as she glanced up at the sky.

"We could look at the clouds and say what they look like yaaar." Suggested Barney. "Like I think that the one over there looks like a duck."

"Good idea … hmm; that one looks like a waffle." Said Lavender as she and Barney sat down and looked up at the clouds.

"That one looks like a dinosaur." Noted Barney.

"That one looks kinda like a trumpet." Said Lavender as she relaxed.

"Hmm … is it me or does that one over there look a little bit like an emo?" Asked Barney.

"May as well name it Clive." Joked Lavender with a giggle.

"… Err … I don't get it." Said Barney blankly.

* * *

**Confessional: Battlegrounds shout out for the win!**

**Barney: Watching the clouds is a very relaxing past time; just like listening to the waves during a sunset at the promenade back home. Yaaar I miss my friends and family sometimes … but when I return I'm gonna be rich! Yo ho!**

**Lavender: How exactly can a cloud look like an emo anyway? I just don't see the possibility to be honest.**

* * *

Tabitha was sitting on the beach of Wawanakwa Island; at the very spot she and Uzuri had formed an alliance. Tabitha felt she was doing pretty well in the competition; nobody but Andy suspected her and he was blackmailed into silence anyway. Pretty soon Tabitha would be a million dollars richer and all would be well.

Still; Tabitha almost felt alone, almost. It occurred to her that as of Uzuri's elimination she was the only member of Team Jungle left in the competition; first to go was Fifi due to hating men; that had kind of annoyed Tabitha as that was not an acceptable attitude. Yessica was useless. Hector had suspected her so he had to go. Irene wasn't too bad but was a mere causality on Tabitha's path to the million. Gary was keeping secrets from her and had an alliance behind her back. Vinnie's self sacrifice had benefitted Tabitha really as Andy could have convened him of Tabitha's schemes pretty easily. Uzuri … what was there to say? She was a freak anyway and she had served her purpose.

"I guess the strong always survive; strong minded in this case." Mumbled Tabitha as she lay on her back and relaxed. "It's kind of like that show Survivor really; I'm the sole survivor."

"Hey Tabitha." Greeted Xaria as she walked up, sat on the sand and looked out at the waves. "What do you mean by sole survivor?"

Tabitha put on a regretful face that Xaria had no idea was being faked.

"Well; there are eleven of us left now right?" Began Tabitha.

"True." Said Xaria.

"Well; there are three from Team Grenade, seven from Team Puzzle … and just one from Team Jungle." Explained Tabitha. "I'm the only person from Team Jungle left in the game now that Uzuri has been voted off. It kinda feels lonely in a way."

"I felt the same way before I joined this show." Replied Xaria in understanding. "It's strange how reality shows manage to change people … for better and for worse."

"I'd say you've changed for the better." Said Tabitha truthfully for a change.

* * *

**Confessional: Better than toffee waffles even? Whoa!**

**Tabitha: That time I wasn't lying; I get annoyed by people who complain for no reason. There are plenty of people in this world who have it much worse.**

* * *

"I like the beach." Said Xaria after a few moments of silence. "This very spot was where me and Oscar hooked up."

"It was also where me and Uzuri began an alliance." Said Tabitha before faking a bitter look. "Some good that did; but I suppose … I'll get by."

"Eh; it could be worse." Said Xaria. "You could be one of Kasimar's targets; you saw what he did to Gary, Raven and Mable right?"

"Indeed I did; he is a disgusting horrid man." Said Tabitha while obviously not telling Xaria it was in fact her who had told Kasimar to hurt Gary. "I bet he'll be in jail within a few months."

"…If only Alcatraz Island was still in use; no prisoner has ever escaped from 'The Rock'." Said Xaria wishfully. "If Kasimar was imprisoned there he'd be gone for good as somehow I doubt he's going to turn over a new acorn, err, leaf."

"His kind never seems to get what's coming to them." Said Tabitha; truth be told while Tabitha admitted to herself she wasn't nice she considered herself to be at least a few steps above Kasimar's level. "Anyway; I'll see you later, I'm going to take a walk around camp."

"See ya." Said Xaria as she lay back on the sand and tried to relax before the next, most likely painful, challenge began.

* * *

**Confessional: Who is this 'Ya' you speak of? Yessica was the Y contestant and she was voted off ages ago!**

**Xaria: I wonder what it's like being the last remaining member of your team. Well; I'm not experiencing that yet, Lavender is still here … as far as I'm concerned Kasimar isn't on my team. Why am I always stuck with the sociopaths?**

* * *

Kasimar and Nakia were standing in the forest waiting for Tabitha to arrive so they could plan the next move in the game. Nakia was brushing her hair with her ever present hair brush while Kasimar smoked a cigarette. Nakia looked fairly bored and seemed to want to whine.

"What's taking Tabitha so long?" Whined Nakia impatiently. "I want to know who to gun for next! Oo I hope it's Spider! I'd like to bludgeon him with an iron pipe!"

"Same here; but I have bigger fish to fry." Said Kasimar. "Or at least more important ones."

"What could possibly be more important than getting rid of the cripples?" Asked Nakia shamelessly. "I can't stand to even look at these inferior scum! They're so ugly!"

"Uh huh." Said Kasimar while not really paying that much attention to Nakia's rant.

"I mean; people like Spider are a smear on society." Continued Nakia. "As a member of , I refuse to, like, socialize with the ugly crippled rejects of our world!"

"_Mental reject_." Thought Kasimar before speaking. "Look; if you don't like Spider just beat the crap out of him, problem solved."

"But that's the problem itself." Whined Nakia while stomping her feet immaturely. "For some reason I don't understand everybody likes him! If I hurt Spider they'll attack me and I don't want to be attacked."

Kasimar was inwardly amused at how **pathetic** Nakia was acting but kept his cruel face passive.

"Just get him when he's by himself." Suggested Kasimar. "Oh look; here comes Tabitha."

Tabitha walked up to her alliance members though kept a distance from Kasimar due to his cigarette. Nakia immediately walked up to her and frowned.

"Well … I'm waiting." Said Nakia.

"Waiting for what? A new hairbrush?" Asked Tabitha dully.

"No; I'm waiting for you to apologize for being late!"

"I wasn't late; you were just being impatient." Said Tabitha simply.

"I demand you apologize! You need me in this alliance!" Growled Nakia.

"Cat fight within a minute." Smirked Kasimar with a slightly perverted gleam in his demonic eyes.

"Listen Nakia; I'm in charge here as whether you want to hear it or not I'm smarter than you and I can focus on things besides my hair for more than a few seconds." Said Tabitha coolly. "And Tabitha Teresa Barrington is nobody's puppet; got it?"

Nakia glared for a moment before giving in.

"Fine." Said Nakia bitterly as she went back to brushing her hair.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd fine Nakia fifty dollars for brushing her hair in a no brushing zone.**

**Kasimar: Nakia is a stupid brat who whines when she doesn't get her way … great qualities for being a mindless pawn. If Tabitha was ever to go, which she probably won't, I could have Nakia completely obedient to me. Just promise her revenge on Spider and you gain her loyalty, pretty easy.**

**Tabitha: Nakia is SO annoying! But despite her lack of brain power and obsession about her hair … she's much less of a freak than Uzuri. Now I can rest easy without any references to horror movies.**

**Nakia: **(She is looking at herself in a mirror). **Who has super awesome hair? You do! I'm such a super awesome and pretty star!**

* * *

"Ok; we're at the final eleven now. As I suspect the later challenges will only award immunity to a single person it is necessary that until then you both win immunity every challenge." Advised Tabitha. "Besides; now that only a few of us remain we have to pick of the strongest competitors out of those who don't win immunity. Also we may have to rid ourselves of Andy soon; he knows too much."

"Can I break his legs and taunt him with atomic bomb jokes?" Asked Kasimar.

Tabitha looked at Kasimar in disgust for a moment.

"We'll keep that plan on the back burner for now." Said Tabitha while being inwardly shocked Kasimar would joke about such a thing. "I still say that lavender and Xaria are the main targets … but I'd like your thoughts on who you want to vote off."

"Spider and that dreadful Hispanic horse!" Growled Nakia.

"Spider I can sort of understand; but why vote Quana off, how has she wronged you?" Asked Tabitha dully.

"She had the nerve to stand up to me and act all mouthy! While I'd like both Spider and Quana gone maybe Quana should go so that Spider will just sit down and cry just like a baby." Said Nakia with a devious and nasty grin.

"Ok … so Kasimar; what about you?" Asked Tabitha while inwardly resenting she needed his help in this game.

"I don't give two shits and a #bleep# about who we vote for; I just want to hurt someone maybe just make them really upset." Grunted Kasimar sounding really unsettling.

"I see … well; I guess we can think about it after the challenge." Shrugged Tabitha. "But seriously; if you try and backstab me again you'll both seriously regret it; I promise you that."

* * *

**Confessional: Meanwhile I promise that I will burp within a minute from now … *BURP*! LOL!**

**Tabitha: If you're going to backstab somebody at least have a valid reason; I may not have liked Uzuri either but at the very least I wouldn't have cost my alliance one of its votes on purpose. With brain power like that I'm wondering if Nakia has ever forgotten how to eat. It's certainly not out of the realm of possibility.**

**Kasimar: I like upsetting people, so what? You should know that by now. A guy's gotta have a hobby right? Besides; after the show I'm never going to see these losers again so I may as well make a mark while I can. Yahahahaha!**

* * *

Andy was sitting on the edge of the dock of shame with his legs dangling over the edge as he looked out at the horizon so far away. He felt like there was an enormous weight on his shoulders in more than a metaphorical sense. First he had dislocated his shoulder, now he was being blackmailed over his girlfriend's well being by one of the nastiest people he had ever met; he was of course referring to Tabitha.

"What am I going to do?" Mumbled Andy to himself as he looked up at the sky; normally looking at the stars would relax him but as it was daytime there was obviously not a star in the sky. Andy was alone in this mess; if he told anyone then Mable would suffer immensely. Andy silently wondered what he should do next.

"Does she really want a million dollars this much?" Said Andy almost silently. "I thought she was already rich. Mable was so right; money is the root of all evil."

"She must have a weakness of some kind; what could be her kryptonite?" Said Andy quietly. "I mean; those aliens that invaded London in Dr. Who were deadly weak against vinegar … though I think splashing her with vinegar will just piss her off."

Andy got to his feet and walked back towards camp to get breakfast; maybe the completely disgusting food would temporarily take his mind off things, maybe.

* * *

**Confessional: Kryptonite is a nocturnal rock!**

**Andy: I have to wonder at times; why would Tabitha do all this for a million. Her family is filthy rich anyway so why would a million matter? … I bet it's just greed. But unlike wario she isn't a good person deep down as far as I can tell … but since she's blackmailing me I'm inclined to think that.**

* * *

The eleven campers were seated in the mess hall waiting for Chris to arrive and tell them what their latest challenge would be. Some thought it would involve self harm, others thought it would have a high chance of serious injury and a few dreaded to find out what the challenge even was in the first place. But then again … after you've been electrocuted, eaten, injured and bashed around by the sadistic things Chris has dreamt up you tend to be a bit wary of what he might have planned for you.

"I wonder what Chris has planned for us." Said Jimmy to Eleanor and Quana. "Do you think he is allowed to kill us?"

"Don't worry; that's not going to happen." Assured Quana nicely.

"You know; I have a theory." Said Eleanor shiftily.

"What is it?" Asked Jimmy.

"Ok; how about this. Chris isn't who he says he is. He's not Chris Maclean but is really a serial killer who escaped from a maximum security asylum and after getting a relative to give him a makeover so nobody recognizes him he went into acting school in Brazil. After he graduated by holding a teacher a knife point he fled the country, got another make over and arrived in Canada and is now known as Chris Maclean. Thus he currently is reliving his so called 'glory days' by torturing us mostly innocent kids and teens. And the reason? Because he's secretly a demon from hell and he's trying to win 'brownie points' from the man in red. So, what do you think?" Asked Eleanor sounding proud of her theory.

Jimmy and Quana exchanged glances … it was certainly a theory but it was not only crazy but it was completely insane as well.

"That's a little 'out there' don't you think?" Asked Jimmy while trying not to laugh. "Do you have proof?"

"His attitude is all the proof I need … though really I just made up that theory for laughs. Still; he could be a serial killer."

"Those poor cornflakes." Said Jimmy solemnly as he took off his hat in respect.

"Good one Jimmy." Said Eleanor as she and Jimmy began to laugh.

"The girl has a point though." Said Barney as he sat down next to them.

"What's that?" Asked Quana.

"That Chris is a madman; I think we can all agree on that. Who else would be so sadistic and yet wear a pink thong?" Asked Barney while somehow managing to keep his face perfectly straight and passive.

Everyone on the table shared a laugh.

* * *

**Confessional: Conspiracy theory's R us!**

**Eleanor: What? It could be true.**

**Jimmy: Eleanor's funny; she'd do well in a stand up comedy show.**

**Spider: Considering all that** *cough*** Chris has done I'd say that Eleanor has a** *cough*** point … a very far fetched point but a point all the** *cough*** same.**

**Chris: **(he looks annoyed). **I hate Eleanor!**

**Chef: Chris really cannot stand being the butt of a joke can he?**

* * *

Kasimar was flicking his lighter on and off as he sat at a table by himself and glanced at the bowel of glop in front of him.

"I'd like to set the mess hall on fire just so I wouldn't have to eat this crap anymore; it was bearable at first but now it just plain _**sucks**_."

"What did you say about my cooking? Roared Chef Hatchet as he leapt out of the kitchen holding a very large cleaver and stood right next to Kasimar.

"N-n-n-nothing!" Whimpered Kasimar in terror.

"That's what I thought." Said Chef with a nod if satisfaction as he walked back into the kitchen.

* * *

**Confessional: He 'fought' in a war!**

**Kasimar: **(He looks fairly irritated). **I obviously wasn't scared; Chef Hatchet took me by surprise. And he was holding a bloody #bleep# cleaver! That's enough to make most people jump a little don't you think?**

**Chef: What a coward … though he still is a little creepy and messed up in the head.**

* * *

Xaria sat next to Lavender on one end of what had once been the Team Jungle table; but as Tabitha was sitting on a chair outside the kitchen just thinking it had been unoccupied.

"How are you holding up these days Lavender?" Asked Xaria as she rested her head in her hands while her elbows were on the table. "It's day nineteen; I would have thought that somebody would have lost their mind by now."

"True; being on the same island as Chris and Kasimar for an extended time is a good reason for somebody to go insane ... but I have a strong mind, I've been able to keep myself sane."

* * *

**Confessional: It's the sane game! Yaaaaaaaaaaay!**

**Chris: **(He looks a little disappointed).** I wanted somebody to lose their mind and kill somebody! It'd be good for ratings. **(Chris pouts).

* * *

"Oh; and the fact Barney is here with you had nothing to do with it huh?" Asked Xaria as she raised her eyebrows up and down a little. "I heard laughing coming from our cabin this morning; what was happening because I don't think it was a joke he told."

Lavender thought for a moment before sighing with a blush as she gave a hint as to what happened.

"I'm very ticklish under my feet." Said Lavender simply.

The gears in Xaria's head turned for a moment before she quickly realized what Lavender was telling her.

"Snrrrk! I see." Sniggered Xaria.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm ticklish on my toilet seat! And no; that is not an innuendo ok? Good!**

**Lavender: Look; it's a guilty pleasure alright? It's complicated…**

**Xaria: They grow up so fast don't they? Heehee!**

* * *

Chris entered the mess hall about fifteen seconds later with his usual sadistic grin.

"Good morning idiotic campers; ready too – WAH!" Yelped Chris as he slipped in a puddle of lumpy glop on the floor and fell onto his back. "OWCH! OWIE WOWIE!"

All the campers as well as Chef Hatchet began to laugh at Chris's misfortune.

"Shut up right now!" Said Chris as he angrily stomped his feet like a fat toddler not getting ice cream.

"Sorry Slippy." Smirked Eleanor.

"Shut up!" Said Chris looking red in the face in anger.

* * *

**Confessional: Meltdown on the horizon.**

**Chris: **(He is having a major temper tantrum). **I hate them all so much! Grrrrrrrr!**

**Eleanor: I always thought adults were supposed to be calm, mature and smart … but I've been wrong before.**

* * *

"Stop misbehaving! It's time for the challenge and this one will not only be fun for me but it will test your knowledge as well." Smirked Chris sadistically.

"Looks like I could do alright then." Said Lavender sounding relieved.

"It's not book smarts that I'm testing you on stupid!" Growled Chris. "It's so obvious that it isn't."

"Not really it isn't you only said we're testing our knowledge, you never said what about." Reasoned Tabitha.

"Shut the #mega bleep# up!" Screamed Chris.

SPLAT!

That was the sound of a bowl of soft sticky gooey gruel being thrown at Chris; he screamed and ran out of the mess hall to correct his appearance.

"If anybody messes with my mermaid like that they'll be tasted my wrath as well." Warned Barney with a smirk. "My wrath tastes like gone off fish just so you know yaaar!"

A number of the campers clapped for Barney while Chef Hatchet walked out from the kitchen.

"Nice throw; you would have been a good grenadier in NAAM." Said Chef as he pocketed his spatula. "Anyway; today's challenge is taking place at the amphitheatre; you might as well head there as pretty boy will throw a temper tantrum if any of you are late."

The eleven campers got to their feet and headed towards the amphitheatre while inwardly laughing about the sadistic host's misfortune.

* * *

**Confessional: Let's spin … the wheel of misfortune! Chris's misfortune that is!**

**Andy: Judging by the look on Chris's face I'm feeling a little wary of whatever this challenge is going to be … just … just gotta think some happy thoughts. Spaceships. Aliens. Astronauts.**

**Quana: Back at the amphitheatre? Maybe it'll be a singing challenge; I can get behind that!**

**Lavender: I like it when Barney stands up for me … though I really can handle that dickhead Chris myself … but I don't mind at all; Chris deserves all the karma he gets!**

* * *

A few minutes later the eleven campers were seated around the amphitheatre; the curtains on the stage were drawn closed and Chris was standing on stage; he had quickly cleaned himself and looked good as new … though since this is Chris Maclean we're talking about who the heck cares?

"Ok everyone; are you ready for your next challenge? The challenge that is the first of the final ten challenges? Are you ready?" Asked Chris with a sadistic smile.

"Like we have any choice." Grumbled Nakia.

"Very good then. Today's challenge is going to be easy but at the same time very hard." Smirked Chris.

"How is that possible?" Asked Lavender. "Does it depend on our skill level?"

"Maaaaaybe." Chuckled Chris. "Ok then; today's challenge is one that will have you thinking back all throughout your time here and trying to remember useless things that have happened. This is because day nineteen's challenge is going to be…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A trivia quiz!"

Some campers looked happy, some shrugged in indifference and some looked frustrated.

* * *

**Confessional: Here's one for you; which camper has had the fewest confessionals overall? This might come up later.**

**Tabitha: Aw nuts; Chris might ask questions that could blow my cover … but I think I know how I can sort the problem. Chris is greedy right? And what do greedy people love? **(Tabitha reaches into her pocket and takes out a wad of bills). **Money of course. I think I can bribe him quite easily; and Chris will want to keep the drama going anyway.**

**Chris: That girl knows me so well; money is seriously awesome!**

* * *

"So how is the challenge going to be hard? This looks kind of easy." Said Tabitha sounding suspicious.

"I'm glad you asked me that question Tabitha." Said Chris with a sudden horrible twisted sadistic smile. "I'd like to reintroduce you all to a piece of furniture that should look very familiar! Haha!"

Chris signaled an intern and the stage curtains parted and the campers groaned. Sitting in the middle of the stage was a chair; it was one of the torture chairs back from day seven.

"Yep; it's a torture chair! Haha!" Cackled Chris nastily. "And it is going to play a very big part in today's challenge."

"I dread to think what it will be." Mumbled Quana.

"The rules of the challenge are actually very simple; so simple in fact that even Patch could probably understand them without that much difficulty. You see; I will be asking each of you a trivia question based on something that has happened so far this season and you will tell me what you think the answer is. If you get it right you can sit back down in the audience unharmed … but if you get it wrong you get a _**little**_ electric shock. And every shock you take will get stronger so I'd try to not do too badly if I were you! Haha!" Laughed Chris while some of the campers looked worried.

"How many questions do we have to get wrong before we're eliminated?" Asked Jimmy nervously.

"That's a good question; quite surprising since you're a retarded little kid." Laughed Chris snarkly. "You all have three lives, in other words three shocks. If you get one or two questions wrong then no big deal … it'll probably be funny. But if you get a third question wrong you are out of the challenge and you cannot win immunity. Does everybody understand?"

The contestants all nodded while hoping the electrocution wouldn't hurt too much.

"Ok then; I'm going to give all of you two hours to ask each other questions about each other so that you might stand more of a chance in the challenge … you don't have to tell anyone though … and no writing it down, got it?" Chuckled Chris dryly with a smirk. "So … report back here in two hours and we can begin the challenge."

"What order are *cough* we going in?" Asked spider as he looked at the torture chair in a little fear.

"The order has already been decided but I won't tell you; that would make some of you worry less and I can't have that!" Laughed Chris as he walked backstage. "Two hours everybody! TWO HOURS! Mwahahahahahahaha!"

The campers looked amongst each other and blinked a few times.

"Chris kinda sounded like *cough* Wallace just then." Noted Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I think you'll find the result of this challenge 'shocking'! Hahahahaha!**

**Tabitha: Ok; the first thing I've got to do is bribe Chris. I think that won't be so hard. I'll also have to get information from the others and share it with Kasimar and Nakia because if they don't win immunity they're guaranteed to go and the power of three is more powerful than just a duo.**

**Spider: this challenge sounds ***cough*** alright … **(his eyes widen) **except for the electrocution. If I can give ***cough* **all my friends some information then they** *cough*** might all win immunity. In a best case scenario ***cough* **neither Kasimar or Nakia will win immunity.**

**Barney: Uzuri would have liked this challenge yaaar; I haven't forgotten how much she enjoyed the torture challenge me hearties. I just hope me mermaid Lavender doesn't get hurt.**

* * *

Chris was sitting in a directors chair backstage thinking about the looks of pain and suffering he would see on the campers faces in a couple of hours. It warmed his heart to see a child cry … though most campers weren't children but you get the idea.

"You are a God at upsetting people Chris." Said Chris with a smirk as he sipped some of his latté.

"Hey Chris." Said Tabitha as she walked into the vicinity. "I want to ask you something."

"What is it? How I'm so hot that it breaks the laws oh physics? Haha!" Said Chris as he basked in the sound of his own voice.

"Actually no; I was wondering if you'd get rid of any 'sensitive natured' questions about my whole game plan." Said Tabitha as she reached into her pocket.

"I dunno; if anybody found out it would make for good drama." Said Chris with his usual sadistic smirk. "Unless you bribe me."

Chris glanced at Tabitha in a way that made her feel uncomfortable for a moment. Shaking it off quickly Tabitha took a large wad of money out of her pocket.

"Will this suffice?" Asked Tabitha as she moved the money left and right and Chris's eyes followed it as though he was being hypnotized.

"…Ah what the hell; sure!" Smiled Chris as he grabbed the money and hugged it as though it were his baby. "Oh I love you money!"

"So; you'll get rid of any questions that would make people suspicious?" Asked Tabitha to be clear.

"Sure … but just this once." Said Chris. "I'll need even more payment next time hottie."

Tabitha flinched at what Chris had said but simply nodded and left.

"_What an asshole_." Thought Tabitha to herself as she quickly headed to camp.

* * *

**Confessional: Oh money sweet money; let me count the ways! One hundred, two hundred, three hundred…**

**Tabitha: **(She shudders for a moment before smirking at the camera). **That's that problem sorted; now to get some info on the others.**

* * *

The other ten campers were sitting around the camp exchanging facts about themselves; some of the facts were interesting and some were just plain silly and amusing.

"Yep; the neighborhood thought that Charles was a werewolf and we had to flee to our forest clubhouse and lie low for a few days." Said Jimmy. "It was quite an eventful summer last year."

"That sounds both silly and serious at the same time." Said Eleanor. "Ok; besides animals one of my hobbies is collecting stuffed animals. My favorite color is also forest green."

"I had a feeling it was something like that." Said Jimmy as he looked at Eleanor's hat. "Nice hat."

"Thanks." Replied Eleanor.

Spider and Quana were also exchanging information to prepare themselves for the trivia quiz.

"Ok; my favorite animal is a red panda, I've *cough* been to hospital so much that I've got *cough* a room reserved for me and also you're my first *cough* girlfriend." Said Spider as Quana paid attention. "So; can you tell me anything *cough* I don't already know?"

"Let's see … I have a Cavalier King Charles spaniel called Dixie, I'm allergic to parsnip, my favorite video game is Rayman two the great escape and I can play the banjo pretty well."

"Ok; I'll remember *cough* that … say; I've got a question … though I *cough* doubt it will come up in *cough* the quiz." Said Spider as he twiddled his thumbs.

"Ask away my little arachnid." Smiled Quana.

"Ok … you have a full body tab *cough* right? How did *sneeze* you do that anyway?" Asked Spider.

Quana suddenly blushed and looked around to make sure nobody was listening in on them; she then leaned in and whispered the answer into Spider's ear and his eyes widened.

* * *

**Confessional: We just got crap past the radar!**

**Spider: **(He looks focused and desperate). **Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy ***cough* **thought, think unsexy thoughts!**

* * *

What could Quana have told Spider? See if you can figure it out! A lot of interesting but minor facts will be revealed about the characters in the next chapter so stick around for that.

As usual Tabitha has her eye on the ball and has quickly stopped a potential problem. That girl is craftily isn't she? But Andy does raise a good point … why would she wan a million dollars if her family is already ultra rich?

Stay tuned for part two of day nineteen; lots of electrocution, interesting facts and trivia as well as another vote off are on the way! See you there!

If you liked this chapter and the story overall then why not leave a review? I read them all and usually respond as well. Cheers everybody!


	42. Day 19, Part 2, Trivia Time

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15's story total drama alphabet tat kicks as … prins. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story and I would like it if you respected that and didn't steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains electrocution, Sadism, some love, unfairness, a horrible bully and a nod to the story's overall continuity. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Poll: **A new poll is up! This time it is … … … who do you want to win Total Drama letterz? However … the poll will spoil who gets voted off in this chapter so you might want to finish reading this chapter before voting.

**Note: **We have reached two important mile stones. As of this chapter Total Drama Letterz now has … OVER NINE THOUSAND hits! Thank you to everyone who has made this possible. Also as of this chapter the story is two thirds complete! It feels good to have been writing it for this long. Keep your seat belts buckled though because this wild ride isn't over yet!  
Also ... thsi chapter is the answer to the ultimate question!

Fire up the engines and hit the gas pedal!

* * *

For nearly two hours the eleven campers had been learning a bit of personal information about each other and had also been trying to remember various things that had happened throughout the competition. It goes without saying that not one person was telling Nakia or Kasimar anything so as to decrease their chances of winning immunity yet again. Though the remaining eleven campers knew each other relatively well they had learned a few things about each other that they did not know before.

"No way." Said Jimmy sounding impressed. "You have sixteen pet koi and name all of them after pirates?"

"Yep! Though Blackbeard is my favorite me heartie." Said Barney proudly. "And if I win the prize money I'm going to buy a pirate ship and sail the seven seas and visit all eight continents!"

"But there are only seven continents." Said Lavender skeptically.

"I count Atlantis; it's two hundred miles off the coast of Brazil." Explained Barney. "Every good pirate knows about Atlantis."

"It doesn't exist … but if you're sure." Giggled Lavender.

"So; anything you wish to tell us me mermaid?" Asked Barney as he tilted his hat at an angle for no real reason.

"Well; at school I was once voted 'most likely to be on a comedy series'; it was due to my temper and me sometimes getting angry at silly things." Admitted Lavender.

"Well; I always liked my chicken hot and spicy." Said Barney with a sly grin.

"Are you trying to flirt with me?" Asked Lavender.

"I was debating the possibility." Chuckled Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm debating who the best Jedi is … it's a very serious business.**

**Lavender: Well … that was a little awkward … and I'm perfectly ok with that.**

**Jimmy: I wonder if Chris is going to try and use this quiz to reveal embarrassing secrets. That would be really mean … just like Chris himself.**

**Chris: Of course I am going to stupid kid! Haha!**

* * *

"So Andy; what's your favorite movie?" Asked Eleanor curiously as she and Andy sat down at the Team Puzzle table in the mess hall.

"Probably Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy." Replied Andy. "They say a towel is the most useful item anybody could ever have ever … and they were right."

Eleanor realized Andy was thinking about what happened to Mable and quickly changed the subject and told Andy something about herself.

"I don't know if it will help you or not but I was in the brownies when I was younger." Said Eleanor sweetly. "I got over thirty badges though admittedly some people have gotten every single one of them."

"I've never been in a club like the brownies or the scouts ... I did go to space camp last year though." Said Andy. "Though I'm vice president of the school's Star Ward fan club back home. We regularly debate who the best Jedi was."

"I'll never ever understand Star Wars … ever." Stated Eleanor simply.

* * *

**Confessional: Just like I'll never understand The Legend of Zelda's chronology.**

**Andy: Star Wars is amazing; at least, it is in my opinion. I especially liked the Pod Racing. And you know; I might enjoy this challenge … Tabitha might just get exposed. Kick ass!**

**Eleanor: If you want a good TV show then why watch Hamtaro … or if you don't like anime and you prefer live action then maybe Meerkat Manor. I was so sad when Shakespeare died defended the pups. What a truly heroic Meerkat.**

* * *

Tabitha was standing with Kasimar and Nakia outside of camp; there wasn't much chance of anybody finding them as everyone was trying to learn about each other to have more of a chance at the challenge.

"Ok Tabby; how are we going to do this challenge if nobody will even tell me and Nakia nothing?" Asked Kasimar gruffly with crossed arms.

"First of all, it's Tabitha, not Tabby, second; that was a double negative, get it right." Frowned Tabitha before handing her alliance members a piece of paper each. "You both have ten minutes to take in and remember as much of that information as you can. Heed my word; if you don't win immunity then one of you will be gone for certain."

"Everyone loves me." Said Nakia as she brushed her hair with one hand and held the paper with another. "They're just jealous of me."

"Sure; you tell yourself that." Said Tabitha to humor Nakia as she knew nobody really liked her whatsoever.

"Wait; why don't you tell us stuff about yourself?" Asked Kasimar. "Like what's your cup size?"

"Don't make me slap you; I have a hard hitting hand." Warned Tabitha with a very disgusted look on her face. "Anyway; I can tell you that I hate being called Tabby, I play World of Warcraft to relieve stress and purple is my favorite color."

"Aren't you worried about Chris asking questions that could get your cover blown?" Asked Nakia casually.

"That's a surprisingly good question … and no; I'm not worried at all. I've already taken care of it, don't you worry." Assured Tabitha. "Anyway; I'm going to get back to camp and get some last minute info. You two had better get reading those papers and try to remember the competition so far. And if anyone asks how you know just say you eavesdropped on them Ciao."

Tabitha turned and headed back to camp while Kasimar and Nakia exchanged a glance.

"What's eavesdropping?" Asked Nakia in confusion.

"To listen into another person or people's conversation without invitation or knowing them. In other words … who invited you?" Defined Kasimar promptly.

"But why should I remember things about these losers? Me and my hair are the stars of the show!" Whined Nakia as she stomped her feet immaturely.

"Whatever douche nozzle." Grunted Kasimar as he walked away to look over the notes Tabitha gave him in peace.

Nakia stuck her tongue out at Kasimar and grumbled to herself as she sat down by a tree and looked over the notes.

"Hmm, let's see … Barney is French Californian, Jimmy's favorite candy is jelly beans, and Xaria likes the band queen … boring!" Whined Nakia. "Well; I guess sometimes you have to do things you'd rather not.

* * *

**Confessional: Exactly; I'd rather not let you confess in me.**

**Nakia: This challenge sucks! Well; at least on the bright side people will learn things about me. After that they'll be queuing up to ask me and my hair to forgive them … maybe I can learn something humiliating about Spider in the process. Wheehahahahaaaaa!**

**Kasimar: I have a very good memory so this challenge is going to be easy. Any question Chris asks about the contest so far I'll be ok on. Maybe he'll ask about my proudest moments like breaking Gary's legs and getting Mable injured. Yep; my proudest moments. **(Kasimar smiles to himself though his smile is very foul).

**Tabitha: Well; there's no guarantee they'll get immunity … but I have a feeling. Besides; there's also no guarantee that everyone else will do well at the challenge. I think I'll do ok in my opinion.**

* * *

The two hours that the campers had been given to learn about each other had expired and the eleven remaining campers were seated around the amphitheatre. Chris stood on the stage holding a remote and grinning sadistically at the campers.

"Ok everyone; I hope you used the two hours well; you're going to need to know a fair amount of trivia if you are to win immunity this time around. Anyone feeling scared?"

"That depends … how many volts *cough* are we being shocked with?" Gulped Spider.

"Like I'm going to tell you germ sponge." Sneered Chris. "But the shock will get stronger every time you get a question wrong … so no pressure, haha!"

"It would be a stroke of luck if Chris MacLean was hit by a truck." Sang Quana which made most of the campers laugh while Chris snarled.

"Shut up!" Snarled Chris.

"You kinda had it coming." Said Xaria snarkishly.

* * *

**Confessional: It would be a stroke of luck if Chris Maclean choked on a hockey puck.**

**Jimmy: Xaria's right; Chris did have it coming. He's seriously sick in the head; speaking of which was he dropped on his head as a baby?**

**Chris: Shut up! Grrrr!**

* * *

"Ok campers; to quickly refresh your minds on the rules; if you get a question wrong you get shocked. If you get three wrong you are out! O U T out! The question will be about your fellow campers, trivia of the contest so far… and also past campers! I guess I forgot to tell yo that! Haha!"

"But we should have been told that to give us a chance; that's not fair." Said Jimmy crossly.

"Life isn't fair shrimp; get used to it." Sneered Chris. "And also; the last five campers in the challenge win immunity so try to last as long as you can."

"I dread to find out if the answer in case I'm first … but what order are we going in?" Asked Lavender.

"Well; I thought that since this season has an alphabetical theme we should make you do the questions … alphabetically! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he wiped away a tear of highly sadistic joy.

"Aw crap." Groaned Andy while Xaria looked a little relieved.

"So in case any of you are stupid enough to not know the alphabet; you are going in the following order." Said Chris condescendingly. "Andy, Barney, Eleanor, Jimmy, Kasimar, Lavender, Nakia, Quana, Spider, Tabitha and our resident lucky bastard, Xaria."

"Thanks for the attention." Said Xaria sarcastically.

"You're welcome." Smirked Chris. "Ok then; let's get this quiz a moving! Andy; come on down and prepare to suffer!"

* * *

**Confessional: Abandon all hope ye who enter.**

**Andy: Well; at least I have a high tolerance for pain I suppose.**

**Quana: I don't know who would find this funny … only horrible people. I guess that means Chris, Kasimar and Nakia are going to enjoy this.**

**Spider: I hope this isn't as ***cough* **bad as the torture challenge ***cough* **was.** (Spider gulps nervously).

**Barney: Chris is such a drama queen yaaaar and a complete poser.**

**Chris: I'm no poser you retard! Gaaaah!**

**Lavender: This challenge might be bad … but it brings back happy memories of Kasimar getting stuck in the torture chair. **(Lavender grins impishly).

* * *

Andy sat down in the torture chair and drummed his fingers on the wooden 'arms' of the chair as Chris took out a question card.

"Ok; let's get this party started!" Cackled Chris almost evilly. "Ok Andy time for the first question of the trivia quiz!"

"Let's get this over with then." Said Andy with a sigh.

"Ok; first question … who was the last camper to arrive on the dock in episode one?" Asked Chris.

Andy thought for a moment and quickly remembered who it was.

"Carlton." Said Andy confidently.

"Correct." Said Chris sounding disappointed. "You can sit down."

Andy smiled in relief as he sat down while Barney got up and sat down in the chair.

"Give me your best shot Chris!" Challenged Barney.

"Ok then; I will." Smirked Chris. "Who was the first person to cross the finish line in the first challenge of the season? Bet you can't get that one! Haha!"

"Chris … I did; I was the first to cross the line ya fish brain." Sniggered Barney.

Chris looked pissed off.

* * *

**Confessional: Quick! We need ten tubs of HG; and by HG I mean hair gel!**

**Chef: Has Chris paid even the smallest bit of attention this season?**

**Barney: Hmm … I don't think Chris thought that question through very well me hearties. He thinks he's cool but he's just a fool. Yaaaar!**

* * *

Barney sat back down into his seat as Eleanor walked down and sat into the torture chair looking nervous.

"Ok Eleanor; your question may or may not be hard though the electrocution will probably hurt! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"You're not helping." Frowned Eleanor as she prayed silently her question wouldn't be too hard.

"I try! Anyway; your question is easy … not! Who was the first person to be eliminated from the human snooker challenge?"

Eleanor thought for a few moments.

"Nakia?" Guessed Eleanor.

ZAP!

Eleanor was shocked by the torture chair and Chris laughed sadistically.

"Wrongamundo littler girl! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Nakia swathe second to go; Carlton was the first! You have two lives left and are the first to have the shame of being electrocuted! Haha!"

Eleanor staggered back to her chair as shook off the dizzy feeling and straightened her hair back into its usual style.

"You ok Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy with his voice laced with concern. "That looked like it really hurt."

"I'll be fine Jimmy; don't worry." Assured Eleanor. "I … think its your turn now. Good luck."

"I'm gonna need it alright." Gulped Jimmy as walked over to the torture chair and sat down in it.

"Jimmy; what game did Uzuri play with her Team in the boat race challenge?" Asked Chris.

"…How am I supposed to know? I wasn't on her team." Protested Jimmy.

ZAP!

Jimmy was electrocuted and his long messy hair went into a variety of angles and looked more messy than usual.

"Wrong! She played Eye spy!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "You may go and sit down; its Kasimar's turn next."

As Jimmy sat down Quana looked at Chris angrily.

"How on earth was that fair?" Asked Quana angrily. "Jimmy had no way of knowing that since Uzuri isn't here anymore!"

"Too bad too sad Quana spanner!" Smirked Chris.

Kasimar ignored the boos he was getting as he made his way into the torture chair.

"Try not to get stuck in it again!" Called Xaria to taunt the bully.

"Shut … up." Snarled Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: I loved that incident!**

**Kasimar: I really wish those assholes would stop bringing that up! Suffering isn't funny … or at least it isn't when it happens to me; it is if anybody else suffers though!**

**Xaria: I'm crossing my fingers that he gets stuck in that chair again.**

* * *

"Ok Kasimar; here is your question." Said Chris as he took out a question card. "What is Jimmy's favorite type of candy?"

"Easy; jellybeans." Grunted Kasimar.

"Correct! You've avoided an electric shock!" Congratulated Chris.

Kasimar looked smugly at the looks on the faces of most of the other campers.

"How did he know that?" Asked Jimmy aloud.

"I listened in on your conversations." Shrugged Kasimar as he sat back down.

* * *

**Confessional: I think he's lying.**

**Kasimar: I owe Tabitha one for this … by which I mean I'll not hit on her for the rest of today.**

* * *

Lavender sat calmly in the torture chair as she awaited her question; since Chris hated her he was probably going to make it hard.

"Lavender! Just the person I didn't want to see." Sneered Chris.

"The feeling is mutual." Replied Lavender flatly. "Just tell me the question."

"Spoilsport!" Whined Chris. "Ok; who were the first two campers to hook up during Total Drama Letterz?"

"Gary and Raven." Replied Lavender promptly.

"…Dammit! I wanted to zap you!" Whined Chris angrily. "Fine; just sit back down; you won't be as lucky next time though."

Lavender smirked at Chris minor temper tantrum as she sat back down while Nakia got up and sat in the chair while brushing her hair.

"Ready for your hair to get messed up?" Asked Chris to get a reaction out of Nakia.

"Bring it on; I can answer any question you ask me about these peasants." Said Nakia arrogantly.

"Ok then, here's your question." Said Chris as he took about another question card. "What is Zita's worst fear?"

"Obviously her hair since it is so ugly." Replied Nakia smugly.

ZAP!

Nakia screamed in pain as her hair was sent standing on end and into a very messy style. Nakia wailed in horror when she saw how badly her hair was messed up.

"Haha!" Laughed Chris liker Nelson.

Most of the campers were laughing at Nakia as well.

"Stop laughing or I'll cripple you!" Screamed Nakia in rage as she sat down and tried to repair the damage to her hair's style.

* * *

**Confessional: Nakia needs a hairdresser A.S.A.P … so take your time!**

**Nakia: I want to **_**murder**_** Chris!**

**Quana: **(She is laughing). **I knew it was me going next … but Nakia's expression when she was shocked was enough to keep up my morale.**

* * *

Quana sat down in the torture chair looking calm.

"Quana; the next question is for you." Said Chris as he looked at the question card. "Any you'll never ever figure it out! Haha! Who is the only Hispanic camper?"

"...I am you stupid idiot." Said Quana flatly but quite relieved at her luck at getting such an easy question.

"That isn't fair!" Yelled Nakia. "Her question was too easy! Give her a different one!"

"Sorry Nakia; maybe next round." Shrugged Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Chris hasn't thought this through very well … has he?**

**Chris: In retrospect I probably should have made sure the campers didn't receive questions about themselves … but how can I prevent that huh?**

**Chef: Has pretty boy ever heard of swapping the question card for another? Lousy stupid dumbass.**

* * *

"Good luck Spider." Said Quana supportively to her boyfriend.

"Thanks Quana." Said Spider as he nervously sat down in the torture chair looking worried.

"Oooo; this is gonna be funny." Chuckled Nakia smugly.

"Just drop the grudge Nakia; it is really pathetic." Said Andy flatly.

As Nakia seethed in anger Chris took out another question card and chuckled.

"You'll never guess this one!" Cackled Chris. "Which of the twenty six campers has used the confessional the least ti8mes?"

Spider thought for a moment; it had to be somebody who had lasted a very short time. Daisy and Patch were first to go … and Daisy returned … so.

"I'm going to *cough* guess Patch." Said Spider while praying it was the correct answer.

"…Darn it." Grumbled Chris. "You're correct; you can sit back down."

Spider let out a deep sigh of relief as he made his way back to where he was sitting.

"Good job Spider." Smiled Quana. "I think you stand a good chance at winning this challenge."

"Thank you for *cough* being supportive." Said Spider as he returned the smile.

"Looks like it's my turn to suffer." Sighed Tabitha as she walked off the bleachers and sat in the torture chair.

"Ok Tabitha; here we go." Said Chris as he picked up one of many, many question cards set on the table by him. "What did Kasimar get eaten by in the Pikmin challenge?"

Tabitha blinked … she didn't know this one.

"Err … one of those bird serpent things?" Guessed Tabitha as she quickly griped the sides of the chair in preparation for the likely electric shock.

"ZAP!

Tabitha let out a cry of pain while Chris just laughed his ass off.

"Wrong!" Laughed Chris. "The correct answer was an Emperor Bulblax."

Tabitha groaned at the unpleasant feeling of electrocution as she sat back in her seat.

* * *

**Confessional: Uzuri would beg to differ; she likes being electrocuted.**

**Tabitha: This challenge reminds me of the torture challenge … something that I'd really rather forget. I can sense a lot of pain on the near horizon.**

**Spider: I figured it would be Patch as** *cough*** he was only here for one day. Thank goodness I** *cough*** was right; I'm no Uzuri when it** *cough*** comes to electrocution. It was nice to have Quana's** *cough*** support during the challenge as well.**

* * *

Xaria was the last one to have a go for round one. She sat in the chair and looked a little unnerved by Chris's wide sadistic grin.

"Can you just ask me the question already?" Asked Xaria.

"I was drawing out the suspense … but fine." Shrugged Chris as he picked up a question card. "What was the third course in Pig out or Puke?"

"… Err; was it moldy bread?" Asked Xaria since she didn't know the answer for sure.

ZAP!

"Wrongamundo little nobody!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "It was actually Patch's toe nails and fingernails! Moldy bread was the first course."

Xaria grumbled to herself as she walked back to her seat where she crossed her arms and frowned.

"And that's the end of round one." Said Chris looking very pleased. "Some of you still have all three lives but some of you now have two. Show them the results Chef!"

Chef wheeled a large blackboard on wheels onto the stage; written on it were the results of the first round.

Andy: 3

Barney: 3

Eleanor: 2

Jimmy: 2

Kasimar: 3

Lavender: 3

Nakia: 2

Quana: 3

Tabitha: 2

Xaria: 2

"As you can see; about half of you lost at least one life." Smirked Chris. "I'd give you a rest … if I actually cared! Haha! Time to move onto round two!"

Chef wheeled the blackboard away while all the campers glared at Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Round two, the round that always follows round one.**

**Tabitha: That kinda hurt; well, at least I wasn't the only person to get one wrong. The question just **_**had**_** to be something I didn't know didn't it?**

**Xaria: This is like who wants to be a millionaire gone horribly wrong. Then again … I suppose anything with Chris in it has already gone horribly wrong.**

**Eleanor: Well; it's not as bad as the torture challenge … but I'm dreading my next electrocution if they are indeed getting stronger each time. **(Eleanor shivers).

**Andy: I'm sure I can take the pain of the electrocution … but how long will it be before a question comes up that will expose Tabitha?**

**Spider: I bet when I get electrocuted ***cough* **it's gonna really hurt. **(Spider nervously shakes a little).

**Chris:** (Cuddling a wad of money).** Never! I've struck a good deal! Haha!**

* * *

Andy was back in the chair to start round two off; Chris had a few question cards ready in his hand and looked at Andy sadistically.

"Feeling scared?" Asked Chris with a smirk.

"Not as much as when I first saw your ugly face." Responded Andy.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "Here's your question. Which camper has a name that is Native American in origin?"

Andy thought for a moment; he really had no idea.

"Err … Uzuri?" Guessed Andy randomly.

ZAP!

Andy was electrocuted but looked more irritated at Chris than he was in pain. Chris laughed and sniggered.

"Incorrect! The answer was Quana!" Said Chris sounding amused. "Now back to your seat!"

Andy sat back down and turned to Quana.

"I didn't know you were native Indian." Said Andy sounding interested.

"I'm not; but my parents thought the name suited me." Said Quana. "Are you ok? You look a little in pain."

"Nothing I can't handle." Shrugged Andy.

"Wish me luck guys!" Grinned Barney as he shook Andy's hand and ran to the torture chair.

* * *

**Confessional: Good luck!**

**Barney: this challenge doesn't seem too hard. You just have to have been paying attention to the events that have happened around you. I may not win but it's all about participation right?**

**Quana: If only all of us had Barney's enthusiasm. Even Jimmy was a little worried about this challenge and he's usually all smiles.**

* * *

Barney sat down in the chair and relaxed.

"Ready for the question Barney?" Asked Chris. "Though I'm going to tell you even if you're not ready."

"I'm ready … but are you?" Asked Barney craftily.

"Of course I am dumbass! Why wouldn't I be?" Asked Chris with an impatient frown.

"Because your pants are down." Replied Barney.

Chris screamed and looked down only to find that his pants were still up. Almost everyone laughed and Chris glared at Barney.

"Ok then; here's your question!" Growled Chris. "Who was the first camper to arrive on the island?"

Barney quickly thought back to the first day; he hadn't been the first to arrive or even one of the first so he had no way of knowing. Barney did however remember who was there at the time.

"Vinnie?" Guessed Barney.

ZAP!

Barney's hair was sent standing on end as Kasimar laughed at him and Nakia pulled a face.

"Boo! Boo! You going it wrong! Loser!" Laughed Chris. "The answer was Oscar!"

"You've got something on your face." Said Barney in sudden seriousness.

"Eek!" What is it?" Asked Chris sounding scared.

"The word 'immature' is written all over your face." Said Barney in monotone.

Everyone laughed at Chris again as the sadistic host frowned in anger.

"Get back to your seat you little rat!" Growled Chris.

"No problem Mrs. Maclean." Smirked Barney.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: No you shut up!**

**Chris: **(He is crying into his hands). **Boohoo! Why is that pirate so mean to me? He's a poopie head!**

**Barney: Chris was upsetting everyone and this I had to upset him a wee bit me hearties. It's the circle of life yaaar!**

**Lavender: Now that was funny; seeing Chris have a temper tantrum makes him seem like a toddler in a man's body … an evil toddler.**

**Nakia: Barney's hair was soooooooooooooooooooo ugly after it was electrocuted! Hello? Slob alert!**

* * *

As Barney retook his seat in the audience Eleanor sat down in the torture chair nervously. She had already been electrocuted once and really didn't want it to happen again.

"Ok Eleanor; time for your second question." Said Chris with a sadistic smirk on his face as he picked up a question card. "Who was the first blond contestant to be voted off?"

Eleanor thought for a moment and the answer quickly came to her.

"It was Yessica." Said Eleanor confidently.

"… Regrettably you are correct." Frowned Chris. "I really wanted to see you cry dammit!

Eleanor got back up and sat in the bleachers as Jimmy took her place on the torture chair.

"Question time pipsqueak!" Smirked Chris as he looked at a question card.

"Ask me anything." Said Jimmy sounding a lot more confident than he was feeling.

"Which camper crawled through a vent in the first episode?" Asked Chris while preparing to zap Jimmy.

"Why that would be me Chris." Smiled Jimmy in relief that he wouldn't be getting an electric shock.

"…Oh god dammit!" Snapped Chris as he began to have a temper tantrum. "Why does this keep happening? Why? You shouldn't get easy questions! Aaaaaaarrrrgh!

"I'll just be sitting down now." Said Jimmy as Chris began to blubber. "I just can't stand to see an old man cry … and emotionally I can't take the screaming."

* * *

**Confessional: Personally I LOVE the sound of Chris's screaming!**

**Jimmy: I didn't really know grown men cried at such minor things … the life of a reality show host must be … very stressful.**

**Xaria:** (She has a snarky expression).** When Chris cries I smile.**

* * *

"Ok; Kasimar, get down here." Said Chris after he finished his 'episode'.

Kasimar casually walked down to the chair and sat in it.

"Ok; your second question." Said Chris as he looked at the question card he was holding. "Which girl camper wears yellow panties?"

Kasimar's face was a blank.

"Err … Daisy?" Guessed Kasimar. "Regrettably I'm not entirely certain."

ZAP!

Kasimar was zapped full of electric voltage and his Mohawk had gone out of style and looked like a feather duster. Kasimar coughed and snarled at everyone that was laughing at him.

"Shut up!" Snapped Kasimar with a murderous look in his eyes. "It's not funny! Aaaaargh!"

"You've lost your first life Kasimar." Said Chris sounding disappointed with the bully. "And it case you were wondering; the answer is Xaria."

"Oh really?" Said Kasimar with a nasty perverted look on his face as he leered at Xaria for a moment.

Xaria looked both embarrassed and very uncomfortable.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't wear panties!**

**Xaria: **(She is covering her face with her hands in shame). **I'm so embarrassed … why did Chris have to do that?**

**Kasimar: What a great question! It definitely makes up for the electrocution.**

**Lavender: Chris; that was just low!**

**Chris: Aren't I awesome as usual? Haha!**

* * *

Lavender sat down in the chair and awaited her question confidently.

"How many campers made it to day twenty three?"

Lavender began to quickly add up the numbers in her head for a moment or two; she quickly realized the answer but before she could say it…

ZAP!

"Haha! Trick question! We're not on day twenty three yet! Haha!" Laughed Chris in sadistic glee.

"That's what I as going to say!" Growled Lavender. "Why did you shock me?"

"Did I forget the mention that rule? If you take too long to answer then automatically get shocked and lose a life! Haha! I'm great at making exciting twists! Haha!" Laughed Chris at the look on Lavender's face.

"That's not fair you jackass!" Said Lavender angrily.

"Well what are _you_ gonna do about it?" Asked Chris in a mocking tone.

KNEE OF JUSTICE!

"That." Said Lavender as Chris fell to the ground holding his 'babies'.

* * *

**Confessional: Lavender's knee should join the justice league!**

**Tabitha: even I think what Chris did was very unfair; he had that coming. **(Tabitha smirks).

**Lavender: Chris should be thankful I didn't knee him three times.**

* * *

When Chris recovered about two minutes later the quiz was ready to continue. Nakia was sitting in the torture chair looking bored and combing her hair.

"Nakia; which camper was known best for his cheating?" Asked Chris.

"Wallace … duh!" Scoffed Nakia.

"That question was too easy Chris; any one of us could have answered it." Protested Quana.

"Silence!" Snapped Chris. 2Nakai got it right so she doesn't get an electric shock. Quana; you're up."

Nakia sneered at Quana as they passed each other. Quana sat in the torture chair and awaited the question.

"What talent did Wallace audition for the talent show?" Asked Chris.

Quana blinked; she hadn't even seen Wallace's talent as he hadn't got onto the talent show.

"…Err … musical evil laughter?" Guessed Quana randomly.

ZAP!

"Not even close stupid!" Laughed Chris as Quana's facial expression went wacky for a moment. "His talent was making fireworks."

Nakia laughed at Quana and sneered at her as she walked past.

"Are you alright *cough* Quana?" Asked Spider sounding worried.

"Don't worry Spider; I'm fine." Assured Quana. "And how was I supposed to know that one?"

"You couldn't; Chris *cough* was cheating." Said Spider. "I think he was anyway."

"You might be right." Agreed Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: That reminds me of Wallace and his ways of cheating.**

**Spider: Seeing Quana get electrocuted really ***cough* **gave me an unpleasant feeling; even ***cough* **more unpleasant than seeing by other friends get the same ***cough* **injury.**

**Andy: Every second that goes by is another second of me dreading my next turn.**

**Tabitha: Nakia and Kasimar both have two lives … well; it's better than them only having a single life.**

* * *

Spider sat back in the torture chair and gulped as Chris took out a question card.

"Let's see if you can answer the next bit of trivia I have for you." Smirked Chris with a nasty cackle before frowning as he look at the card. "Aw nuts! …What is Quana's favorite song?"

"The Circle of Life." Responded Spider at once. "And I like that song as well."

"Just get back to your seat; I want to see somebody get zapped!" Frowned Chris.

Spider walked back to his seat feeling revived he hadn't gotten shocked yet while Tabitha sat in the chair.

"What is Spider's worst allergy?" Asked Chris.

Tabitha pretended to think for a moment as answering quickly may arise suspicion.

"Wasn't it apples?" Said Tabitha in a pretend guess. "What happened to him in the eating challenge was … just **bad**."

"Correct … damn it!" Growled Chris. "Why won't somebody just get electrocuted already?"

As Tabitha sat back down in the bleachers Xaria got up and sat in the chair for her second question.

"Ok then Xaria; what is Quana's favorite type of confectionary?" Asked Chris.

Xaria thought for a moment.

"Is it vanilla slices?" Guessed Xaria confidently.

ZAP!

"Wrong again little nobody! Haha!" Laughed Chris in glee at Xaria's pained expression. "The answer was in fact doughnuts … duh! And I bet that shock was more painful than the first right? I wasn't lying! Haha!"

Xaria flipped Chris the bird and staggered back to her seat on the bleachers and just groaned.

"And that is the end of the second round!" Announced Chris. "Let's see how the standings have changed … shall we? Haha!"

Chef wheeled the blackboard on stage again; the numbers of lives had changed for a fair number of the campers.

Andy: 2

Barney: 2

Eleanor: 2

Jimmy: 2

Kasimar: 2

Lavender: 2

Nakia: 2

Quana: 2

Spider: 3

Tabitha: 2

Xaria: 1

"Looks like most of you are in the middle." Observed Chris. "While Xaria however is nearly out. And I think I should give Spider a metaphorical lucky bastard award! Haha!"

"He has to be, like, cheating!" Whined Nakia.

"I've just had good *cough* fortune." Said Spider as he really hadn't been cheating.

"Now let's get right back to it and move onto round three!" Sniggered Chris as he rubbed his hands together in sadism. "Oh Aaaaandy! It's your turn again! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: The power of three is evident in round three!**

**Xaria: I'm nearly out already … I've gotta get my head in the game!**

**Nakia: Why won't Spider just lose? Why won't he get flushed away back to where he came from? No fair! **(Nakia crosses her arms in a huff and pouts).

**Tabitha: Ok; Nakia, Kasimar and myself all have two lives. That's good enough I guess. I just hope they don't get hard questions or my alliance might be in trouble.**

**Kasimar: Man; getting zapped really hurts! This bites. But as always … it's worth the million.**

**Eleanor: Spider is so lucky; he hasn't been electrocuted yet.**

* * *

Andy sat back in the torture chair for his third question.

"What color were Patch's shorts?" Asked Chris.

Andy thought back but really couldn't remember; they were either black, brown or green.

"Were they brown?"

ZAP!

"Ouch!" Groaned Andy as he received his second electric shock.

"Haha! That was funny." Laughed Chris as Andy sat back down in the audience and Barney got up and sat in the torture chair.

"Ok Barney; here is your question." Said Chris as he quickly glanced at the question card. "Who went into the Labyrinth of despair with Zita in the first challenge?"

"Yaaaar! That would be Path and Yessica Chris me kraken!" said Barney confidently.

Chris looked disappointed that he wouldn't be able to electrocute Barney.

"Correct; you may sit down." Muttered Chris in frustration. "Eleanor; come on up!"

Eleanor gulped as she sat in the torture chair while Chris picked up yet another one of many question cards and glanced at the question.

"What type of food did Wallace stuff in Xaria's mouth in the torture challenge?" Asked Chris while seriously hoping Eleanor wouldn't get the right answer.

"Um … is the correct answer mayonnaise?" Asked Eleanor as she really had no idea.

ZAP!

Eleanor yelped in pain as she was electrocuted a second time while Chris laughed in hysterics.

"Haha! I love it when children are upset! Haha!" Laughed Chris horribly while Eleanor glared.

"Ok now; was that necessary!" Asked Eleanor sounding angry and upset.

"Yes." Nodded Chris.

Eleanor frowned at Chris and sat back down in the bleachers.

* * *

**Confessional: Zappity zappy zap!**

**Eleanor: That really hurt; suffering isn't something to laugh about! **

**Xaria: Chris reminds me of Jaron in a way; and not in a good way either.**

**Kasimar: Yahahahaha! Did you hear Eleanor yelp in pain? Priceless! Haha!**

* * *

Jimmy sat down in the torture chair and understandably he looked fairly nervous.

"So .. what's my question Chris?" Asked Jimmy.

"What type of plushie does Irene sleep with?" Asked Chris.

"Err … a Bulbasaur?" Guessed Jimmy.

ZAP!

"Yowch!" Wailed Jimmy as his hair was sent into various angles again.

"Wrong jimmy; you are so very wrong! Haha!" Laughed Chris as he laughed and pointed at Jimmy. "The correct answer was a tree plushie."

"Sounds cute." Said Jimmy as he rubbed a sore spot on his head.

"Now get back to your seat stupid!" Said Chris impatiently.

Jimmy walked back to his seat as Kasimar strolled down and sat in the chair; just about everybody booed him but he didn't care as he felt quite confident.

"What is the name of Barney's favorite of his pet koi?" Asked Chris.

"Blackbeard." Replied Kasimar sounding smug and bored.

"Correct!" Announced Chris. "No electrocution for you!"

Kasimar sat back down looking smug while Lavender got up and sat in the torture chair wondering what question she would be asked.

"Who was the first to cross the finish line with hair gel during the race at the Playa Des Losers?" Asked Chris with a smirk.

"How am I supposed to know?" Asked Lavender in exasperation. "Nakia?"

ZAP!

Lavender set out an erratic groan of pain as she was electrocuted a second time. Chris sniggered at her misfortune.

"This challenge just keeps getting better and better." Cackled Chris.

"Oh go and screw a goat!" Growled Lavender as she sat down looking pissed off.

After that Nakia stood up and walked to the torture chair; she sat in it looking bored as she brushed her hair; she had nearly managed to get it back to how it normally was.

"Ok Nakia; here's your question." Said Chris as he glanced at the question card in his right hand. "Who here has the best hair on the island?"

"That's such an easy question." Smirked Nakia smugly. "Me of course!"

ZAP!

Nakia screamed from the electricity streaming throughout her body for a moment and glared at Chris.

"Sorry Nakia … well, not really, but you are wrong!" Said Chris happily. "The correct answer should have been obvious … me! I have the best hair! Duh! Haha!"

Nakia just scowled and walked back to her place on the bleachers; she then noticed how messed up her hair was and screamed in horror while everyone in the vicinity laughed.

* * *

**Confessional: I can't bare the hair!**

**Nakia: **(She is oddly silent and just glowers murderously while brushing her hair).

**Tabitha: And now Nakia only has one life left. I do hope she realizes how serious the situation is.**

**Andy: This challenge just doesn't seem mortally correct … but since Chris thought it up then why am I asking?**

**Chris: **(He has a rather creepy expression).** Nobody has better hair than me … nobody! **(He hisses).

* * *

Quana was the next in the torture chair; she tapped her fingers on the arms of the chair while Chris read the question.

"What is Carlton's worst fear?" Asked Chris.

Quana thought for a moment and had a good idea what the answer was.

"Trick question; he's afraid of everything." Replied Quana sounding confident.

ZAP!

Quana lurched in pain from the electric current as Chris cackled.

"Wrong answer." Replied Chris. "His worst fear is in fact … lawn gnomes; stupid I know."

"Everyone has a fear Chris; what's yours?" Asked Quana craftily.

"I'm not telling." Replied Chris. "Either way you have just one life left so I'd be worrying if I were you."

Quana just shrugged as she sat back down in the bleachers while Spider got up and sat back in the torture chair.

* * *

**Confessional: Here comes more trouble!**

**Chris: I custom made the next question for Spider; this is gonna be awesome! Haha!**

* * *

"Ok Spider; let's see if you'll lose a life this time." Said Chris as he picked up a specific question card. "Exactly how did Quana get her tan, you know what I mean! Haha!"

Spider froze as Chris laughed.

"What a horrible moral dilemma huh? Confess your girlfriends secret or get an electric shock! Haha!" Laughed Chris. "Though sadly I don't have the answer as I made this question just before the quiz and I couldn't here Quana whispering … but nonetheless … what's it going to be? Take a while to think about it; your conscious must be on fire! Haha!"

"I'm not saying *cough* anything." Said Spider bravely.

"…What?" Said Chris sounding quite surprised. "But why?"

"Straightforwardly I'd rather get *cough* electrocuted than betray Quana's *cough* trust." Shrugged Spider.

Chris looked pissed.

"Dammit! You were supposed to tell everyone! You stupid #bleep#! I hate you! You're on my list now! Grrrr!" Screamed Chris as he had yet another 'episode'.

ZAP!

Spider was zapped and groaned in pain; Chris clamed himself down into just a frown as Spider sat back down next to Quana. Quana looked very touched.

"That was very noble of you Spider." Cooed Quana with a smile that made Spider's stomach flutter. "You're a big person; a good egg."

"That means a *cough* lot coming from you *cough* Quana." Blushed Spider.

Quana was about to give Spider a kiss but Chris's air horn interrupted her.

"Cut it out you two!" Snapped Chris. "I still have a quiz to run and I don't want anybody getting distracted!"

* * *

**Confessional: The secret is safe! Yaaaay!**

**Spider: I think the electrocution ***cough* **was worth the smile on Quana's face. **(Spider smiles).

**Quana: That was a very big sacrifice Spider made; seriously, being electrocuted really hurts!**

**Chris: Dammit! That didn't go the way I wanted it to! **(Chris pouts and frowns).

* * *

It was Tabitha's turn next and she sat in the torture chair trying it keep her facial expression neutral as she had a low tolerance for pain and really didn't want to get electrocuted.

"Which camper never had a vote cast against them throughout their time in the island." Asked Chris.

Tabitha quickly remembered that Raven hadn't been eliminated by votes and thought that she was the one.

"Raven." Answered Tabitha.

"Correct." Sighed Chris dully. "You know … this challenge is only really fun for me when people actually get electrocuted. No fair."

Tabitha sat back on her chair quite relieved that she wasn't electrocuted as Xaria made her way to the torture chair for her next question.

* * *

**Confessional: Here's a good question. What is the meaning of life?**

**Lavender: I still think Raven shouldn't have gone; the so called 'rules' of this contest are batshit insane and unfair. I hope you're having fun at the Playa with your boyfriend Raven.**

* * *

"Ok Xaria … you've only got one life left." Smirked Chris as he held a question card. "If you get this wrong then you are out of the challenge and will suffer a painful electric shock! Haha!"

"Just ask me the stupid question Maclean." Frowned Xaria impatiently.

"Fine; what was the most amount of people stuck in Wallace's hole trap at one time?" Asked Chris.

Xaria blinked and gulped; she really didn't know … but maybe she could make a lucky guess.

"Three?" Guessed Xaria hopefully.

ZAP!

Xaria screamed as an extreme amount of electricity shocked her body. She snarled at Chris who was simply laughing sadistically.

"So close; the biggest total was four; during the Christmas challenge." Explained Chris. "And Xaria … you are out of the challenge! No immunity for you! Haha!"

"At least I won't be electrocuted again." Shrugged Xaria as she sat back down.

"And with Xaria's elimination that's the end of the third round!" Announced Chris with a silly yet sadistic grin on his face. "Chef; care to show us the victims their overall standings?"

Chef grumbled as he wheeled out the large backboard that had the campers lives on it. After the last round it had changed a fair bit. Here is what it now said.

Andy: 1

Barney: 2

Eleanor: 1

Jimmy: 1

Kasimar: 2

Lavender: 1

Nakia: 1

Quana: 1

Spider: 2

Tabitha: 2

Eliminated: Xaria.

Almost all of you have one life left while a few of you have two." Noted Chris. "I think it's time to start getting more of you eliminated and electrified! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Hectic electric!**

**Quana: Bring it on Chris.**

**Lavender: I can tell this won't end up very well for most of us.**

**Andy: I have one life left … and the last electric shock is apparently the worst … this **_**won't**_** be fun.**

**Kasimar: I've got this in the bag! Yahahaha!**

**Eleanor: I hope the questions aren't going to get harder; I really don't want to get electrocuted … but does anybody?**

* * *

"Let's get round four started!" Cheered Chris as he asked a question to Andy who was already in the torture chair. "Which camper likes mango smoothies?"

"Err … Irene?"

ZAP!

Andy yelped in pain while Chris laughed sadistically.

"Yessica actually … you're out!" Smirked Chris.

Andy grumbled as he sat back in the bleachers while Barney went up for his question.

"Who has a degree is basket weaving?" Questioned Chris.

"… … … Zita?" Guessed Barney randomly.

ZAP!

"Wrong! Haha! The answer was Daisy." Said Chris idly.

"What kind of school gives degrees in basket weaving?" Asked Barney in confusion as he sat back down in the bleachers as Eleanor got up again.

"Which two campers were never on a team?" Asked Chris.

"Patch and Daisy." Replied Eleanor at once.

"Why did she have to get an easy one?" Muttered Chris as Eleanor sat back down with the others.

* * *

**Confessional: Because she's lucky stupid!**

**Jimmy: This challenge is both cruel and suspenseful … kinda like a long wait for a new popular movie to be released.**

* * *

Jimmy was back in the chair trying to look calm as Chris got ready with another question.

"What color were the boxes in the Christmas challenge?" Asked Chris as he readied his finger on the button that would electrocute Jimmy.

"… … … I can't remember." Said Jimmy with a gulp.

ZAP!

"And Jimmy is out of the challenge." Laughed Chris as Jimmy staggered back to his seat. "The answer was red and green … …Kasimar; you're up!

Kasimar was soon seated in the chair awaiting Chris's trivial question.

"Which camper was immediately kicked off due to injuries?" Asked Chris.

"Obviously Raven as I remember it was partly my fault." Said Kasimar indifferently.

"Correct!" Said Chris.

"How can you not care about the awful things you've done?" Asked Quana in disgust.

"Easy; I think they're funny." Replied Kasimar with a shrug.

"Try some remorse Kasimar." Advised Jimmy. "It's good for your soul."

"I have no soul!" Scoffed Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: So you're a ghost?**

**Spider: … That explains a ***cough* **lot actually.**

* * *

It was then Lavender's turn for a question with a threat of being electrocuted.

"What is Uzuri's middle name?" Asked Chris while hoping Lavender wouldn't get it right.

Lavender thought back through the competition and remembered Uzuri mentioning it in the fear challenge.

"Xisonu." Said Lavender calmly.

"Correct." Grumbled Chris.

As Lavender got out of the torture chair Nakia sat in it moments later.

"Name one left handed camper." Said Chris.

"Vinnie." Replied Nakia with an arrogant yawn.

"Correct." Nodded Chris as Nakia sat back down.

Quana sat in the torture chair while hoping her question would be easy as she had one life left and didn't want to get electrocuted again.

"Which camper was afraid of heights?" Asked Chris.

Quana thought back to the fear challenge; she was very quickly narrowing down the possibilities but before she could say her answer…

ZAP!

Quana let out a pained scream as she was electrocuted a third and final time. When it stopped she walked back to Spider with a few erratic movements caused by the voltage.

"The correct answer was Oscar." Chuckled Chris. "And due to that you are out! Haha! Next!"

Next up for a question was Spider.

"Which camper is a fan of Hamtaro?"

"Eleanor is." Said Spider as he remembered hearing Eleanor talk about it earlier.

"Correct." Grumbled Chris.

Tabitha readied herself for the next question as she sat back in the torture chair; the chair she hated so very much.

"Who dug the pit trap?" Asked Chris.

"It was Wallace." Said Tabitha confidently.

"Correct!" Frowned Chris. "C'mon! Somebody gets electrocuted! But … it looks like it is the end of the round. Chef; care to reveal the current standings?"

Chef wheeled on the blackboard once again and only a few campers remained in the game.

Barney: 1

Eleanor: 1

Kasimar: 2

Lavender: 1

Nakia: 1

Spider: 2

Tabitha: 2

Eliminated: Andy, Jimmy, Quana, Xaria.

"Following that round it looks like all of you have been electrocuted at least once ... let's see if we can make it happen again! Haha!" Laughed Chris as Chef wheeled the blackboard off stage again. "As Andy has been eliminated Barney is now going to be going to be starting us off."

"Oh joy." Said Barney sarcastically as he sat in the chair.

* * *

**Confessional: Shock tactics.**

**Tabitha: Ok; I've got two lives as does Kasimar. Nakia only has one. Still; I have faith she won't screw this up. I don't really like her at all but I need her vote; just promise her some so called 'revenge' on Spider and she laps it right up.**

**Jimmy: Two more people need to lose for the challenge to be over … I'm hoping Kasimar and Nakia are the ones who lose; if one of them won the million it would be quite an injustice to us all.**

* * *

"What did Gary do to Daisy in the first challenge that got her seriously pissed off?" Asked Chris.

Barney thought back to the first challenge; he remembered Daisy being furious and dripping with something but he couldn't quite remember what it was.

ZAP!

"Time's up!" laughed Chris. "The correct answer was blue jello! It always finds its way to her! Haha!"

"I guess I'm out then right shark bait?" Asked Barney as he got to his feet.

Yes you are." Said Chris before he began to whine like a baby. "And don't call me shark bait! Weeeeeeh!

Barney say back down as Eleanor sat into the torture chair looking nervous as she knew the next electric shock would not only mean she was out but also it would hurt more than the previous two.

"Ok Eleanor; if you get this right you are still in the challenge … if you get it wrong you are eliminated and the challenge will end … so no pressure! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

"You can do it Eleanor!" Cheered Jimmy to encourage his best friend.

"No helping her!" Whined Chris.

"Ok … give me the question." Said Eleanor while trying to be brave.

"Ok then; here it is." Said Chris as he picked up a question card. "How many votes did Carlton get at this season's first Bonfire Ceremony?"

Eleanor blinked and quickly began thinking. She vaguely remembered Carlton being one of those who had votes; but she had no way of knowing how many votes he had. She'd have to guess.

"… Was it two?" Asked Eleanor while bracing herself in case she was wrong.

ZAP!

"Ouch!" Yelped Eleanor as her hair stood on end and pain surged throughout her body.

"Wrong Eleanor; so totally completely wrong! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically like he always did. "The correct answer was one; Carlton voted for himself!"

"Darn it." Mumbled Eleanor as she trudged back to the bleachers

Chris took out an air horn and used it to blast a loud noise into the air to get the camper's attention.

"And with Eleanor's screw up the challenge is over!" Announced Chris while making wild gestures with his arms. "Looks like some of you have really been paying attention … and some of you are completely retarded! Haha!"

"I was so close." Mumbled Eleanor.

"Don't feel bad; you did your best." Said Jimmy comfortingly. "Nobody can ask for more than that."

"Thanks Jimmy." Smiled Eleanor.

"Quiet!" Snapped Chris. "Ok; the five winners of this challenge are Kasimar, Lavender, Nakia, Spider and Tabitha. You five are safe at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony."

"So who wins *cough* the prize?" Asked Spider.

"About that … there is no prize today! Phych! Haha!" Sneered Chris. "The only prize you have today is immunity; you'll have to do without any reward. Haha!"

"Oh go suck a #bleep# Chris!" Growled Kasimar.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "I'll see you all at tonight's ceremony; five of you are invincible and six of you are not … who's it gonna be? Cast your votes wisely."

"Where are you going no; she asked not really caring." Said Xaria.

"I've got a massage scheduled in ten minutes and the women massaging me has D cups!" Grinned Chris. "See you later losers!"

As Chris left the campers looked amongst each other for a moment. After a moment of silence Kasimar spoke up.

"Ha! I'm immune and you can't vote me off! Suck my balls douche nozzles! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he walked away to smoke in the woods.

"… What a **dick**!" Scowled Lavender.

"It's Kasimar; what did you expect?" Asked Andy while glaring after Kasimar and also glaring at Tabitha for a split second so that nobody would notice.

* * *

**Confessional: Only ten can make it to the final ten … and one will not.**

**Andy: I vote would vote for Tabitha if she was available … but as she is immune I can't … hmm … I guess I'll vote for Xaria as I don't know her too well. Nothing personal.**

**Xaria: I'm going to vote for Andy; he's returned to the game so he'll have been watching us and might have an advantage … and he's way smarter than Nakia by quite a large margin.**

**Lavender: I'm voting Jimmy; it's not that I don't like him; it's just because he'll become more of a threat over time when only a few of us remain.**

**Eleanor: Chris said vote wisely … I guess he means to vote off who we think is a that. I'd vote for Kasimar or Nakia if they were available … but as they are not I'm going to vote for Barney. I like him and he's nice and funny … but he'll be a big threat as the contest continues … and I doubt he'll get voted off tonight anyway.**

**Spider: I'm voting Eleanor; I ***cough* **like her … but she's a threat. I think ***cough* **some of the others are voting for threats** *sneeze* **as well. I'd much rather vote for an enemy ***cough* **than a friend though … sorry Eleanor.**

**Nakia: Tabitha said to vote for somebody who she wanted gone; who was it again? Urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh … Oh yah! I remember! I vote for. **(Static cuts her off).

* * *

The final eleven campers sat around the bonfire on stumps and logs looking at the flames dancing in the starlight. As they sat in silence Barney spoke up.

"What a beautiful night. There is almost nothing quite as relaxing as looking up at the starry night sky yaaar." Commented Barney. "It's humble … in a way. We're just a mere spec in the _vast_ canvas of the galaxy."

"Shut up! You're chewing up my screen time!" Whined Chris as he arrived with a tray of ten marshmallows.

"Oh look; Hades rises out of the underworld." Said Xaria with a snarky grin.

"The evil alien hatches from his oozy egg." Added Andy.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris again as he set the tray of marshmallows down on the oil drum and looked at the eleven campers in front of him. "Campers; welcome to another Bonfire Ceremony. We are mere moments away from the final ten. Some of you must be nervous … or at least you will be if you failed to get immunity! Haha!"

"You don't need to rub it in." Muttered Quana.

"Ok; when I call your name come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe … for now. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … that means that you are out of the contest … and you can't come back … EVER!"

"Like how me and the nobody came back?" said Nakia smugly.

"Shut up!" Shouted Chris as he stomped his foot angrily.

"He has issues yaaar." Whispered Barney to Lavender.

"Right on." Giggled Lavender.

"Stop interrupting me!" Screamed Chris sounding pissed. "The first five marshmallows go to our immunity winners of today."

"Tabitha"

"Spider"

"Kasimar"

"Lavender"

"Nakia"

The five who were called got up and took their marshmallows while the remaining six campers stayed seating.

"Each of you now has a one in six chance of being voted off." Said Chris to the campers still sitting down. "I'll tell you right now who is **not** going to be walking the dock of shame tonight."

"Quana"

"Barney"

"Eleanor"

"Xaria"

Andy and Jimmy were still seated and both were without a marshmallow. Jimmy gulped and looked nervous while Andy looked determined.

"Andy, Jimmy … this is the final marshmallow. Whoever does not get this must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't _ever_ come back _**ever**_. The final marshmallow of tonight goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Jimmy.

Jimmy let out a quiet sigh of relief and walked up to collect his marshmallow and looked at Andy sympathetically.

"Sorry Andy; if only Kasimar could have voted off." Said Jimmy apologetically.

Andy blinked and shrugged as he got to his feet.

"It's alright; it was only a matter of time I suppose." Said Andy as he shook hands with his friends. "Though I would have liked the million."

"You may not have won a million me heartie … but you won Mable's heart didn't you?" said Barney as he shook Andy's hand.

"…True; well, see you around guys. Give the nastiest heck!" Waved Andy as he began to walk to the dock of shame; after a few steps he stopped and turned around.

"Oh … and watch out for rats." Said Andy casually and before anyone could ask anymore questions he walked to the Dock of Shame and rode the Boat of losers' away into the night.

"What did he mean by that?" Asked Eleanor.

"The mess hall kitchen has a rat problem." Shrugged Chris. "Either way … all of you have now reached the final ten! The end of the contest is on the horizon everyone so now the challenges are going to be getting harder … or I may just be psyching you out! Haha! Sweet dreams losers … actually; sweet nightmares! Haha!"

Chris left the Bonfire Pit as the final ten campers looked amongst each other.

"Final ten! Woohoo!" Cheered Barney.

"Too bad most of you have bad hair." Whined Nakia. "I'll win for sure now. Goodnight losers."

Nakia left for bed and soon enough the other nine campers followed; they felt happy they had made it to the final ten but also worried that Kasimar had made it as well.

* * *

**Confessional: An after ceremony recording.**

**Tabitha: Andy gave them a warning … but it was very subtle and they didn't seem to completely understand it. Therefore I won't go through with my threat. Still; Andy was becoming a thorn in my side and I needed him gone. Now it's the final ten and nobody besides my allies knows about my strategy … and so it shall stay.**

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame to give the closing comments of the episode. He looked happy and grinned for the camera.

"Andy has been blasted out of orbit and is once again voted off; this time for good. With Andy gone only ten campers remain and only nine more days until we can crown a champion. Who will be the next person to be voted off? Who will Tabitha's alliance target next? Will Kasimar ever hurt anyone again? And you even bother to remember what you found out this episode? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Andy: Xaria

Barney: Voted for Kasimar to prove a point. (Doesn't count)

Eleanor: Barney

Jimmy: Voted for Kasimar to prove a point. (Doesn't count)

Kasimar: Andy

Lavender: Jimmy

Nakia: Andy

Quana: Andy

Spider: Eleanor

Tabitha: Andy

Xaria: Andy

Andy: 5

Jimmy: 1

Xaria: 1

Eleanor: 1

Barney: 1

Votes that don't count: 2

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again

* * *

So Andy is gone once again? I know he had some fans … so I apologize if any of you are disappointed that the space fan has been voted off again. His role after returning was to hook up with Mable and try to fight back against Tabitha. While he may not have succeeded in defeating Tabitha he has made his mark and I think he will be remembered.

Only ten campers remain; who are you most rooting for? Why not let me know in a review?

Next Time: How do you like the sound of being chained up with another person and forced to find your way out of a cave system? Sounds pretty 'uncool' right? Well that's what the final ten will be doing!


	43. Day 20, Part 1, Subterranean Complex

**Disclaimer: **I do not own total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his now one year old story called Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story and I would be grateful if you did not steal them. Thank you.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**The Warning:** This chapter contains knockout gas, a truly sadistic host, some seriously vile thoughts, some mild ship tease, hair related discrimination and several bad cave puns. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Crag's Interesting Fact: **There are fourteen girls and twelve guys in this story … that was a mistake on my part, it was supposed to be equal for both genders … but you can't change the past and I like how this has turned out. Bet you didn't know that!

**Current Poll Result: **As of this chapter Barney is leading the poll with three votes, Jimmy, Quana, Spider and Tabitha are tied for second for two votes each, Eleanor, Kasimar and Xaria are third with one vote each and in last are Lavender and Nakia with not a single vote. I'd quite like to know who voted for Kasimar as I didn't think that he had any fans to be honest. But the poll is still open until the next chapter so you can still vote if you haven't already!

**Note: **We have reached the final ten. Sixteen campers have bitten the dust and only the ten strongest contestants remain. The elimination for the final ten is completely set in stone now so it will not be changed. Make sure you pick a character to root for in the last nine episodes of the competition! Obviously I cannot root for anyone as I know the winner … but do you? Probably not but feel free to tell me exactly who you want to win and why; it'll be interesting to know. So without further rambling or delay here is chapter forty three of Total Drama Letterz; enjoy it everyone! And maybe leave a review as well.

Attention defic – oooo shiny!

* * *

Chris stood on the Dock of Shame smiling for the camera. It was only an hour after Andy had been voted off. The moon was high in the sky and reflected celestial light down onto wawanakwa like a spaceship riding a moon beam. Chris made some dramatic gestures and began speaking to the camera.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. It was time to weed out the last weak contestant from the ten strongest … and what better way to do that … than a trivia quiz? A way to not only find out more about these flat character contestants but also a chance to test everyone's memory as well as have some fun with electrocution! That's right, I said electrocution."

"The idea was that a camper would be asked a question; get it wrong and they receive an electric shock! And let me tell you; the camper's facial expressions were very 'shocking'! Haha! Not a single one of them managed to got away completely unscathed. Everybody was zapped at least once!"

"The questions came thick and fast. The remaining eleven campers had to think quickly on their feet as if they didn't answer a question in time then they would be zapped! Lavender found this out the hard way as did Barney. And what was zapping them you may ask? One of the torture chairs from day seven! Haha! It must have bought back some painful memories right?"

"Some of the campers completely sucked at answering questions; how hard is it to remember something obscure in the last two and a half weeks anyway? Not very hard at all I tell you! But it was her complete suckatude that made Xaria the first to be eliminated from the challenge."

"I tried to give Spider a moral dilemma; reveal Quana's secret and continue … or keep the secret and get zapped. And guess what; the stupid sick germ sponge kept it to himself over something completely stupid like not betraying Quana's trust! Laaaaaaaame! I gave him a well deserved shock for that; why does he have to be nice? Nice people finish last! I've never been nice to anybody and I feel on top of the world! … Spider sucks!"

"In the end six of the campers lost all of their lives and thus they lost all chance at winning immunity. That meant that Tabitha, Spider, Kasimar, Lavender and Nakia were all immune and were guaranteed a place in the final ten. Kasimar is probably the strongest competitor as he has won immunity every single challenge since the merge! I knew I was wise to bet on him!"

"At the Bonfire Ceremony the marshmallows were handed out to those without immunity. It came down to Jimmy and Andy. Andy had the majority of the votes by a considerable margin and he was eliminated for the second time. He took it in stride and left; though he gave the others a subtle warning about Tabitha that was subtle enough for her to not fulfill her promise."

"With Andy gone not only has Tabitha gotten rid of a big threat to her game plan but also only ten campers remain! The game is really picking up now! Who out of the final ten is going to win a million dollars?"

"Eleanor the animal lover"

"Lavender the strategic cheerleader"

"Xaria the complainer"

"Barney the pirate"

"Jimmy the Pollyanna"

"Spider the Sick kid"

"Kasimar the complete monster"

"Nakia the hair lover"

"Quana the loving singer"

"Or could it be Tabitha the manipulator?"

"Who will be the next to get voted off? Who works best in a pair? Can Kasimar win immunity again? And are any of the remaining campers secretly scared of the dark? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

The atmosphere in the sleeping quarters of the Team Puzzle guys was slightly depressing. Andy's bed was once again empty, its occupant gone once more from the island. The remaining three Team Puzzle guys were currently lying in their beds both a little sad Andy was gone but also excited that they were getting near the end of the contest.

"It be quite a shame Andy is gone once more savvy?" Said Barney as he took off his hat in respect. "Especially since he was so close to the final ten as well."

"I agree; but he had the most votes and once you are voted off you have to walk the dock of shame." Said Jimmy. "Still; he'll be back with Mable right? I'm sure that is a good thing."

"You always know how to look at the positives in any situation don't you Jimmy?" Smiled Barney. "That's good; especially since the end of the contest is near and the challenges will get a lot more insane me heartie, yaaar."

"I honestly never thought *cough* I'd get this far." Said Spider from his bunk. "There have been times that I've *cough* regretted being here … but overall I'm so glad *cough* that I signed up."

"That's the spirit Spider." Said Jimmy positively. "Focus on the positives and subtract the negatives."

"I wonder if any of us in this room are going to win yaaar; imagine that, spending almost a month with a future millionaire and not even knowing it savvy!" Exclaimed Barney with a hearty laugh.

"If I win a million I *cough* don't feel it yet." Said Spider. "It all comes down to who wins immunity *cough* and when they do."

"I hope Kasimar doesn't keep winning immunity." Frowned Jimmy. "He's been unvotable at the past five Bonfire Ceremonies; though I voted him last night to prove a point that he shouldn't be here."

"As did I me heartie." Concurred Barney. "That demonic devilfish should rot in Davie Jones locker!"

* * *

**Confessional: As I've said before … Davie works out a lot so his locker smells REALLY bad!**

**Barney: If Kasimar smacks Lavender on the rump he's going to need a wee heck of a lot of plastic surgery … Savvy?**

* * *

"So the three of us have made it to day twenty." Said Jimmy with a satisfied smile. "Hey guys; what has been your favorite part of the contest so far you know; a bit you liked above all else."

"Hmmm; I'd say the boat race yaaaar." Said Barney promptly. "Not only did we win the challenge but I talked with Lavender and started giving Spider some love advice, all in all a mightily fine day me hearties."

"That's a pretty easy *cough* question." Said Spider with a smile and a faint blush. "My first kiss with *cough* Quana; definitely a moment *cough* I'll remember."

"What's it like to kiss a girl?" Asked Jimmy sounding quite curious.

"Special and *cough* sweet." Replied Spider. "Quana's a really *cough* good kisser."

"I'd say it varies from person to person cabin boy." Said Barney philosophically. "Some say it's simply two people touching lips, others say it's a special moment with your significant other ... and some like pineapples yaaar."

"… I think that sort of explains it … sort of." Chuckled Jimmy. "Why did you mention pineapples though?"

"Because I'm part Californian." Shrugged Barney.

"That doesn't make *cough* any sense." Blinked Spider a few times while looking a tad confused.

"Who cares about sense these days; have you even seen twilight? Completely senseless me hearties." Chuckled Barney. "Nap time!"

Barney was out like a light just a second later and began to lightly snore. Jimmy and Spider exchanged glances and chuckled.

"Well … that's one way *cough* to end a conversation I *cough* suppose." Said Spider after a moment or two of silence. "Well; just nine days left until the end *cough* of the contest; to think that I *cough* thought I'd be one of the first to *cough* go."

"You're a nice guy; you're kind nature is your selling point." Smiled Jimmy. "Well; we may as well get some sleep. They'll be another challenge tomorrow and as it's the final ten … Chris might make it hard."

"How does Chris sleep at night *cough* after all he's done to us?" Asked Spider sounding macabre. "Does he not feel *cough* guilt or the lump in someone's stomach that *cough* they get when upset?"

"I wouldn't know; I can't read minds, I'm no psychic." Shrugged Jimmy as he lay down. "But Chris is kind of like Earl from back home … he's a bully."

"If only I could stand up *cough* to a bully." Sighed Spider. "You're ten and you've stood *sneeze* up to Earl."

"To be fair I couldn't have done it on my own; I had help from my friends." Admitted Jimmy. "Just believe in yourself Spider; works for me."

Jimmy lay down to go to sleep and Spider left to think by himself.

"_Believe in myself_." Thought Spider. "_Good idea … but a lot easier said than done_."

* * *

**Confessional: Close my eyes and feel the buuuurn!**

**Jimmy: It's a shame Andy is gone … but Spider and Barney are still here. You know; during the time I've been on Wawanakwa I wonder what the guys are up to back home. Has Ted done any get rich quick schemes lately that will inevitable backfire … good times. **(Jimmy smiles in remembrance).

**Spider: Hmm; after all that has happened to ***cough*** me on this island … I could write a ***cough* **book about my experiences. I'd call it 'my life as a ***cough* **teenage nut'. Maybe that's an idea ***sneeze*** worth considering.**

**Chris: No! It wouldn't sell very well at all because it's about a lame contestant and not the incredible awesome me! …Spider sucks!**

* * *

Lavender was lying on her belly while on her bed; she was writing something on a sheet of lined A4 paper. Xaria was in bed and was sitting up with the covers drawn over her legs and looked over at Lavender.

"What are you doing?" Asked Xaria with idle curiosity. "Are you writing poetry?"

"Not quite; I'm strategizing." Explained Lavender. "That is to say I'm thinking of ways that I can avoid elimination and take out Kasimar."

"I wouldn't worry too much; evil people always get what's coming to them in the end even if it takes a while." Said Xaria with a dry yet nice tone. "His luck is gonna run out sooner or later; just have faith in good triumphing over evil."

"…Since when have you been so positive?" Asked Lavender with a smile. "To think you used to be so grumpy."

"I turned over a new leaf … though I was never exactly evil." Shrugged Xaria. "So; what strategies have you come up with?"

"…To be honest they aren't real strategies, more like wishful thinking." Said Lavender as she glanced out the window at the stars. "For example; spray Kasimar with the essence of blood and toss him to the sharks … boy; I'm starting to sound like Uzuri."

"She was more than a little oddball … but her heart was most definitely in the right place." Said Xaria as she lay down in her bed. "Besides; I think that Kasimar deserves more than sharks."

"What I don't understand is how Kasimar can get away with so much; he has GOT to have broken his contract at some point in time by now, right?" Asked Lavender sounding like she wanted to groan in angst. "Maybe I'm just overreacting … but Kasimar is a foil to all that is good."

"You're not overreacting." Assured Xaria. "He's not just bad; he's evil, a terrorist waiting to happen."

"I just hope he gets eliminated soon; I don't want him hurting any more of my friends." Said Lavender as she put the paper under her pillow.

"Don't get your hopes up; Chris will probably keep him around to cause us some additional suffering." Said Xaria flatly as a punctured tire on a car.

* * *

**Confessional: Incredibly lame pun I do think so.**

**Xaria: I may not be such a grouch anymore but I'm still not exactly an optimist, I'm more of a cynic. **

**Lavender: Kasimar's winning streak has to come to an end sooner or later right?**

**Chris: Don't count on it dumbass!**

* * *

"Wow; you're cheerful." Said Lavender sarcastically.

"I try." Said Xaria with a shrug. "Besides; you should be happy instead of sad."

"I'm not exactly unhappy … but why should I be happy?" Asked Lavender.

"And I thought you were really smart." Smirked Xaria. "It's the final ten; we're on the home stretch of this marathon race."

"Oh yeah! In all my frustration I'd kinda forgot." Said Lavender with a pretend face palm. "You're right Xaria."

"As always." Smirked Xaria.

"Yeah, sure." Said Lavender with a playful eye roll as she smiled. "I've come pretty far in this game; I think I've proved that a cheerleader doesn't have to be stupid like everybody seems to believe."

"I'm surprised I've gotten this far to be honest." Said Xaria as she thought back to previous days on the island. "But I have had a little help along the way."

"That's what friends are for." Said Lavender kindly.

"I kinda meant Oscar … but you've helped a lot as well." Nodded Xaria. "I think I have a shot of going all the way."

"A million dollars is a heck of a lot of money; with that I could go on a nice vacation to Egypt … and maybe get therapy from all the trauma I've experienced on this island." Mused Lavender.

"After yesterday I bet it won't be electric shock therapy." Smirked Xaria.

Lavender had a stony expression.

"Very funny." She said in an extremely sarcastic tone. "I never even want to look at an electric chair ever again."

"Same here." Agreed Xaria. "Good night Lavender; let's hope Kasimar's luck runs out tomorrow."

As Xaria lay down Lavender yawned, stretched and lay down as well.

"Yeah, let's hope." Mumbled Lavender sleepily.

* * *

**Confessional: Sleepy time is a time when you sleep as could logically be expected.**

**Lavender: Here's hoping that Kasimar is voted off at the next Bonfire Ceremony.**

**Chris: Don't count on it! This show needs him so that he can cause drama! He'll never lose; Haha!**

**Xaria: Host's aren't supposed to show favoritism among the contestants yet it's pretty obvious that Chris wants Kasimar to walk away with the million dollars.**

* * *

Quana and Eleanor were both in their beds resting after the day's challenge. Both of them hoped that they would never have to sit in the torture chair again, let alone even see it. Eleanor still felt a little sore from the three electric shocks she had suffered, Quana also felt a little dazed; Chris wasn't lying, the last shock had been really painful.

"Eleanor; do you know any good lawyers?" Asked Quana suddenly.

"Sadly I don't; I'm guessing you want to sue Chris right?" Said Eleanor as she rubbed her head a little.

"I sure do; did you see the expression on his face when somebody got shocked? He wasn't shocking us because it was for the challenge; it was for his own sick sadistic amusement! In fact; a lot of the stuff he's made us do in challenges is just so he can laugh at us getting hurt."

"I know; Chris was pretty nasty last season, nobody can deny it … but this season he has really been level grinding his sadistic side." Said Eleanor as she lay back on her bed and groaned. "I feel so sore … I'd like to give Chris a Polish Charlie Horse."

"What's one of those?" Asked Quana curiously.

"It's a torture Oscar told me about that he wanted to do to Kasimar." Explained Eleanor with a chuckle. "It involves chilly sauce, a telephone … and someone's butt."

"Eep! Can we change the subject? That sounds quite painful." Gulped Quana before adding. "Though Chris might deserve that."

* * *

**Confessional: What a torture that is!**

**Quana: But maybe that would be too extreme even for Chris… nah! He deserves it!**

**Chris: **(He is whining). **Shut up Quana spanner!**

* * *

"Dandelion is only a day or two from giving birth." Said Eleanor excitedly as she looked into her ferret cage; Dandelion was curled up on a lump of bedding that seemed to be a sort of nest. "I think she's carrying three babies. This is so exciting!"

"Right on Eleanor; you must be looking forward to it." Smiled Quana. "Do you know how to take care of baby ferrets?"

"Well Frost and Dandelion will be doing most of the work since they are the parents … but I've always been fascinated by ferrets so I have a general idea of what to do." Said Eleanor as she reached into the cage and stoked Frost under his chin to which he squeaked in appreciation.

"This contest is everything I thought it would be." Said Eleanor. "Interesting animals, nice people and new friends … and also some memories I'll never forget."

"What about Chris and Kasimar." Asked Quana.

"Now those two I wish I could forget." Stated Eleanor briefly.

"At least Kasimar isn't hitting on you." Said Quana trying to be positive.

"I think he tried to flirt with me during the army challenge." Said Eleanor while cringing at the memory. "He's not only a complete monster with no redeeming qualities that I'm able to see … but he's as far from my type as is possible. I'd prefer somebody who is sweet, cute, loves animals, treats me with respect and also makes me laugh."

As Eleanor lay down to go to sleep she heard Quana giggle.

"What's so funny?" Asked Eleanor while still lying down.

"Nothing much … just that your specifications of your 'type' kind of sound exactly like … Jimmy." Said Quana teasingly.

Eleanor just blushed bright red at this realization as she closed her eyes to go to sleep.

* * *

**Confessional: A romantic tween screen.**

**Eleanor: **(She looks very embarrassed). **Ok; the similarities to Jimmy were **_**totally**_** an accident; maybe a coincidence. …He wouldn't be interested anyway.**

**Quana: Does Eleanor **_**like**_** Jimmy? Well; I did always like toy ships in movies … this'll be kinda cute!**

**Chris: Eleanor sucks because she insulted me! So ha!**

* * *

Kasimar was alone in the dark in his cabin smoking a cigarette. It felt good to have the cabin to himself as he was the only guy left from Team Grenade. He didn't feel worried about losing at all; he had won immunity five times in a row and there was not a single reason why it couldn't be a total of six times. And with the alliance he was in he felt pretty comfortable on his standing in _the_ game; he had reached the final ten and only nine opponents remained, seven of which weren't in his alliance and he felt he could beat them in any contest with extreme ease.

"Just nine more days and I'll be a millionaire; once I've got the money I could do a load of cool things." Said Kasimar to himself as he puffed some spoke to the ceiling. "Maybe I could buy the local orphanage and have the orphans kicked onto the street for a cheap laugh."

Kasimar chuckled a deep and dark laugh to himself as he began to think about his remaining opposition in the game.

"_Barney; probably the biggest threat. He's well liked and he's a lot smarter than he lets on. Still; he's definitely not as strong as me so I have the advantage there_."

"_Eleanor: besides Jimmy she's the weakest of my competition. And she's got those ferrets … maybe I could use them in some sort of blackmail tactic … sounds good_."

"_Nakia; can you spell R-E-T-A-R-D? Not a threat at all; if myself, Tabitha and Nakia get to the final three then Nakia's definitely going to go_."

"_Jimmy; I won't let Tabitha vote him out just yet. Bullying him is just too much fun_!"

"_Bug; not a threat at all. I just truly love seeing him squirm … its too bad that he stopped trying to lose weight or he could have died … hmm, pity_."

"_Lavender; a threat … but I'd like her to suffer a bit more than simply getting voted off; maybe I could cripple her…_"

"_Tabitha … my ally … I'll have to backstab her eventually but for now she's useful, kind of like Wallace except not retarded; she's got a nice ass too_."

"_And Quana_; _if she'd just accepted my advance she'd be in a strong position … but now she's dating Bug_. _She's hot as fire, sometimes I really want to rape her…_"

Kasimar chuckled to himself as he continued smoking while thinking very unsavory thoughts about Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: Will the prince save his beloved princess?**

**Kasimar: Only nine more campers to go … they're going to see why it's **_**really**__**NOT **_**a very good idea to get on my bad side.**

**Chris: I'm going to really enjoy finding out that information! Haha!**

* * *

Since Nakia was getting thrown out of the Team Puzzle girls cabin every night due to her incessant whining and complaining about Spider as well as everyone's hair she had now moved her belongings into the Team Jungle girls cabin and was thus bunking with Tabitha.

"Thanks for letting me stay in here Tabitha; Quana and Eleanor are being so unreasonable." Said Nakia as she brushed her hair.

"Don't mention it." Shrugged Tabitha indifferently.

"Hey! You should be more grateful that I'm thanking you; I don't often give thanks you know." Frowned Nakia.

"I can imagine that quite easily." Said Tabitha with a shrug.

"Oh whatever!" Snapped Nakia.

"Anyway; we've made it to the final ten, the challenges are going to get harder." Warned Tabitha. "Remember; if you don't win immunity you'll most certainly be voted off unless Kasimar also doesn't win immunity."

"Oh please; I could beat any of these social rejects in any sick twisted challenge that Chris could possible think up." Boasted Nakia arrogantly. "I'm beautiful and they are not."

"What does that have to do with the contest?" Asked Tabitha with a dubious raised eyebrow.

"Nothing; I'm just getting the fact across." Said Nakia airily as she continued brushing her hair.

* * *

**Confessional: If a hare can jump high can a hair jump high also?**

**Nakia: My hair is my selling point. If you look at me what do you think? Obviously that I'm beautiful I bet.**

* * *

"Nakia; if you want to bunk with me you're going to have to keep tolerable attitude; I can only stay calm for so long." Said Tabitha as she lay on her bed simply staring up at the bunk above her. "Though Uzuri was probably much more annoying than you could ever be."

"Thanks." Smiled Nakia clearly missing the backhanded aspect of the compliment.

* * *

**Confessional: A backhand slap hurts more than a fronthand slap.**

**Tabitha: **(She lets out an exasperated sigh). **Her head is full of hair if that.**

**Nakia: At least somebody **_**finally**_** acknowledges my obvious superiority.**

* * *

"Sixteen of our opponents are gone; since me, you and Kasimar are allied that leaves seven others left to mop up." Said Tabitha. "Consequently we should pick of the biggest threats since the challenges are inevitably going to get harder. I would like Lavender or Xaria to go personally."

"Then why did you tell us to vote off Andy? I personally hated the traitor too … but why him and not a threat?" Asked Lavender.

"He was a threat!" Said Tabitha sounding annoyed. "He knew all about what I was doing but unlike you he had the good grace to tell somebody. It was only a matter of time before he cracked … so he had to go."

"Well; it's one less traitor for me to worry about." Shrugged Nakia.

"Uh huh." Said Tabitha dully while not completely listening to what Nakia was saying.

"Seriously; they're all so horrible you'd think that they were cripples." Whined Nakia.

"Err … what?" said Tabitha wanting to make sure she had heard what Nakia said right.

"I said they're as bad as cripples; so ugly, so pathetic and completely useless and unpopular in society." Said Nakia with an indifferent tone. "I'll see you tomorrow Tabitha; sweet Spider-less dreams."

Nakia lay down and Tabitha could only think one sentence to herself before settling down to sleep as well.

"_Could she possible get __**anymore**__ prejudice_?" Thought Tabitha in disgust.

* * *

**Confessional: It is hard to believe but even evil has standards.**

**Tabitha: I may hate people too … but at least I don't exactly target an entire group of people.**

**Nakia: **(She is looking at herself in a mirror). **Who's has the best hair in the whole universe? You have the best hair in the whole universe!**

**Chris: Actually I have the best hair in the whole universe. Get your facts straight!**

* * *

The following morning the ten campers were eating breakfast in the mess hall; today's special was very chunky, thick and squelchy pink pancakes that had way too much batter in them. It was a very eye watering sickly meal; it wouldn't have been so bad if Chris hadn't skimped on the food budget so much.

"These pancakes taste *cough* like a gross green pickle of *cough* despair and pain." Groaned Spider as he force fed himself.

"I'd say they taste like sardines." Gagged Jimmy. "And I seriously hate the taste of sardines."

"Let's just agree they taste vile." Mumbled Tabitha as she pushed her plate away from her. "Right now I'd really like something luxury like a Sultan's Golden Cake."

"I'd like some prawn toast." Said Quana wishfully.

"Right about now some ham and pineapple pizza would be really nice." Said Eleanor as she tried to visualize herself eating her craved food.

"I'd like a hot curry." Said Kasimar as he tossed his plate behind him.

"I could go for some jelly beans." Mumbled Jimmy.

"Quit your whining!" Snapped Chris as he walked into the mess hall though he quickly thought for a moment. "Actually, continue whining. Not only is your obvious suffering good for ratings but it is music to my ears! Haha!"

"Your such an immature asswipe that your favorite song is probably the SpongeBob Squarepants theme tune." Muttered Xaria.

"Oh _**GOD**_ I _**hate**_ that song." Said Kasimar with a visible flinch.

"But at least it answers the question of who lives in a pineapple under the sea." Chuckled Jimmy.

"Watch it kid; I'm a lot bigger and stronger than you; I could easily hurt you." Warned Kasimar eerily which made Jimmy promptly be quite and look down at his fork.

"Can we get the attention back to me please? Everybody knows I'm the main character in this show." Whined Chris with a tone of arrogance mixed into it. "Anyway; I have an important announcement to make to you all."

"You're still living with your parent's minnow boy?" Asked Barney with a smirk.

Chris looked really pissed off and stomped his feet angrily.

"Shut up!" Barked Chris in fury.

* * *

**Confessional: Wow … epic comeback … not!**

**Barney: Chris should take anger management classes savvy … and maybe read a thesaurus so he can put together some more creative insults yaaar; he's currently got all the brains of a starfish … in other words none yaaar! Yo ho!**

* * *

"Ok." Said Chris after he calmed down from his temper tantrum. "Congratulations to you ten campers; you've outlasted sixteen others and have reached the final ten. We're starting to come towards the end of the contest. From here on it will get much harder as the challenges will get more physically demanding and dangerous … or I could just be saying that to get you worried for no reason! Haha!"

The campers frowned and waited for Chris to finish his speech.

"Before I announce the challenge I would like each of you to use the confessional and tell be how you feel about making it so far. You can give a shout out to eliminated campers or your friend's ands family back home. You could even discreetly taunt your opposition; whatever you have to say it's time for your final ten statement.

* * *

**Confessional: Wise words from the final ten.**

**Barney: Yo ho! I made the final ten! It's been so much fun getting here yaaar and I hope the rest of the competition will be just as enjoyable me hearties! Who knows; I might prove to be a captain and go all the way to the end. I'm ready to sail the sea of the competition! Yaaaaaar!**

**Eleanor: Besides some nasty occurrences such as what happened to poor Gary, Raven and Mable … I've had a pretty good time. With Dandelion nearly ready to give birth, my good friends around me and the fact I've got so far … I feel quite happy about signing up. Despite everything … I kinda like it here.**

**Jimmy: So, I'm in the final ten huh? I guess the saying about nice guys finishing last is completely bogus. Ted; try not to do anything too ambitious with those get rich quick schemes of yours. Pablo, make sure you fill me in on what has happened in my absence. Charles, I hope you're not studying too much, summer is a time for fun! And Ricky, have fun riding your bike like you always do! I'm gonna try my best to win this contest and then we'll all be rich!**

**Kasimar: I knew I'd make it to the final ten so this is no real surprise that I'm here. It was just a matter of beating people up and backstabbing others. Wallace was useful … but he outlived his usefulness. I'm going to win the million dollars and if anybody attempts to stand between me and what is rightfully mine … they'll be **_**wishing**_** they hadn't.**

**Lavender: I've stayed true to my original game plan; use my brain and not backstab anyone … and it's paid off! Though I would like to win the million I have a secondary goal … make sure that Kasimar doesn't win. That'll be easier said than done … but with Barney's help I feel I might manage it. And Mable; I hope your leg feels better and that you are enjoying yourself at the Playa Des Losers with Andy. Same to you Raven expect replace Andy with Gary.**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair). **Like whatever! I'm in the final ten, exactly where I deserve to be! Getting voted off was, like, a mere setback. Now that I'm allied with Tabitha and on a winning streak the money is as good as mine! **(Nakia scowls darkly). **But if there is one thing I want besides the million it's that Spider and his Hispanic Horse of a girlfriend get humiliated or injured and are voted off. I think Tabitha could make that happen very easily.**

**Quana: I've had a really good time on this Island. Though I've met a prejudiced and shallow brat as well as a bully who hits on em … I've made some really good friends and I've got a boyfriend! And who knows, maybe I could win this contest. I have a one in ten chance of winning and considering how many others have already been voted off … I like those odds. **(Quana smiles).

**Spider: I never thought that** *cough*** I'd get this far. This contest has been ***cough* **a rollercoaster indeed. I've been ***cough* **bullied, poisoned, fallen in love, ***cough* **gained a weight paranoia and I'm friends with a ***cough* **pirate. And yet … I think I've really had a ***sneeze* **good time. I might even win … but I'll ***cough* **have to defeat Kasimar and Nakia first … that'll** *cough*** be easier said than done. When I get home I'll have to thank ***cough* **Dr. Howard for recommending me to go ***cough* **on this show in the first place.**

**Tabitha: I've had not a problem getting this far Sure; some people may have caused a little trouble but I took care of them. Out of my remaining opposition they are either my allies or have no idea that I've been playing them like a fiddle. I'm justifiably confident that I can go all the way and win this game. I have to win and so I shall.**

**Xaria: Despite the fact that Chris and Kasimar are insane, the food sucks and that the challenges are psychotic … I've enjoyed myself a reasonable amount. I've opened up. I miss you Oscar … and I plan on winning. I'll continue where you left off and I'll make sure Kasimar gets his comeuppance. Though I wouldn't mind shaving off Chris's hair either. **(Xaria laughs).

* * *

When the campers had finished making their confessionals they returned to the mess hall and were met with an odd sight. Chris was still there waiting for them … but he was wearing a gas mask.

"Err … Chris … any particular reason you are wearing a gas mask?" Asked Lavender with a confused expression and some suspicion. "There isn't any toxic gas in the air you know."

"Oh I know." Nodded Chris with a shrug. "It's part of the challenge."

"Fair enough." Shrugged Lavender as she let her suspicion go.

"So what's the challenge today yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"I'm glad you asked me that Barney." Said Chris as he let out a sadistic chuckle. "In two words; here is your challenge for today…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

...

...

…

Think fast!"

Before anybody could react Chris threw a bomb at the campers which quickly emitted a large amount of a green colored smoke. In just a moment or two all ten campers had collapsed to the ground completely unconscious. When the smoke cleared Chris removed his gas mask and laughed out loud very sadistically.

"Well that's step one done." Smirked Chris. "I wonder if any of them are having nightmares; that'd be funny! Haha!"

Chris looked down at Spider who was knocked out like everyone else. Chris prepared to kick him simply for cheap amusement but he felt a hand tighten on his shoulder.

"Chris; that's going too far." Said Chef with a growl.

"But it'll be edited out!" Whined Chris while stamping his feet.

"No backtalk solider!" Barked Chef which made Chris shiver is terror. "Let's just chain them up and get this stupid challenge started."

"This challenge is not stupid!" Said Chris in a whiny obnoxious voice. "It's gonna be epic! I should have included it in the first season! Who ever knew Wawanakwa had such a labyrinth of cave tunnels underneath it?"

Chef just shrugged in disgust at Chris's extreme sadisticness as he and a few interns chained the campers into pairs and picked them up to take them into the Wawanakwa caves.

"What if they wake up while we're carrying them huh?" Asked Chef grumpily.

"I used the best knockout gas money can buy; the mayhem will be worth the sacrificed hair gel. They'll stay asleep." Assured Chris. "And give each group a torch with some batteries; as much as I'd like them to scream and cry in terror my contract sadly forbids it.

* * *

**Confessional: Knockout gas; it knocks you out … captain obvious strikes again!**

**Chris: This challenge is gonna be awesome! While in retrospect I should have decided the pairings … I feel that whatever pairs the interns and Chef randomly chained up should provide some real drama! I wonder if any of them are scared of the dark. Hmm. Well; if they succumb to their mortality in the caves and die we have replacement reserve campers ready just in case so it's all good. Haha!**

**Chef: And in that moment Chris crossed the line from normal evil to card carrying cartoon chaos villainy! **(Chef puts his hand to his face and slowly shakes his head).

* * *

_**(six and a half hours later)**_

* * *

Lavender stirred as her eyes slowly opened. She sat up and looked around; she was in the dark in a location whose name and place she could not guess. She tried to get to her feet but felt something holding her down. Lavender looked to her left and saw Tabitha unconscious next to her, a chain attached to their wrists was keeping them together.

"Tabitha; wake up." Said Lavender as she shook Tabitha a little.

Tabitha slowly regained consciousness as she looked around and sat up.

"Where are we?" Asked Tabitha. "This isn't the mess hall."

"I don't know; the last thing I remember was Chris throwing a sort of bomb and … … oh that monster." Growled Lavender. "The bomb must have contained a sort of knockout gas; that's why he was wearing a gas mask!"

"I'm guessing us being chained up has something to do with the challenge." Said Tabitha before her eyes landed on a torch nearby with a piece of paper underneath it. "What's this?"

"Read it; I'd like to know what's going on." Said Lavender as she looked around trying to figure out where they were.

"Ok; let's see." Said Tabitha as she began to read the message on the paper.

_Dear campers_

_You have been tranquilized with knockout gas! In case you are wondering where you are … you are underground in Wawanakwa's cave system. Your challenge is to find a way out of the caves and back to the surface. But be warned; you'll have to work together in order to escape. Also; the caves are dark; you have a torch but your light is not infinite, use it wisely! The first two pairs out of the caves win immunity from tonight's ceremony. And try not to disappoint me by dying __**too**__ early … I really want to enjoy this! Haha!_

_Chris_

"It's official; Chris has crossed the line." Said Tabitha in disgust as she pocketed the paper and handed Lavender the torch. "Well; at least we know where we are now."

"Did Chris even try to consider how dangerous this challenge is?" Asked Lavender with an audible groan. "What if there is a cave in? What if a group can't find their way out?"

"I'm sure he has a failsafe in those situations." Said Tabitha hopefully as she reached into her pocket and took out what looked like a miniature hand held laptop.

"What's that?" Asked Lavender curiously.

"It's my W.H.M; that's an acronym for windows Handheld Mailbox." Explained Tabitha as she turned it on.

"Wait; isn't having something like that heating?" Said Lavender suspiciously.

"It's not; as long as I'm on the island I can't get a single bit of signal so I can't use it … but I could use its light to brighten our surroundings and save torchlight." Said Tabitha as she held it in front of her which slightly illuminated the dark rocky surroundings.

"Good idea." Smiled Lavender before noticing some bats above them looking at them. "Let's get going … those bats might be dangerous just like most things on this island.

"I'm right behind you." Agreed Tabitha as she and Lavender started to head deeper into the darkness in search of a way out of the caves so they could win immunity and wring Chris's scrawny neck.

* * *

**Confessional: I know a story about a cave; it's called cave story!**

**Lavender: I guess Chris wasn't lying when he said that the final challenges would be harder … and if this is just the ninth to last … what will those to come be like?**

**Tabitha: That cave felt as though we were in a survival horror video game … was Chris high when he thought that challenge up?**

**Chris: **(He is smoking some cannabis). **Aaaaaa, that's the stuff! Yeah man.**

* * *

Jimmy had awoken a minute or two ago and had been greeted with darkness and the sound of an eerie silence. He had read the letter Chris had left them (which was the same as the one Tabitha had read) and now he was holding the torch fearfully while trying to think of what he should do. The sound of a sleepy yawn got his attention.

"What happened … wait; where are we?" Asked Quana as she sat up and looked around before spotting jimmy next to her. "Jimmy; where are we? And why are we chained together?"

"Read this." Said Jimmy uneasily as he passed Quana the letter; she read through it and looked stunned and angry.

"How could Chris do this? He knocks us out with a bomb of knockout gas and now he leaves us in a dark cave … that man belongs in an asylum with a happy coat!" Grumbled Quana. "You ok Jimmy?"

"Not exactly … I've been in the dark sewers a few times … but this is an all new extreme." Said Jimmy with a shiver. "Well; at least we have a torch with us."

"How merciful of him." Said Quana sarcastically as she and Jimmy got to their feet. "Well; we might as well get moving and see if we can find a way out of here. You gonna be ok?"

"I think so." Said Jimmy as he tried to be positive. "I feel better in frightening places if I have a friend with me; besides, it's not like sasquatchinaquwa is in here … at least I hope it isn't."

"I wouldn't worry about it Jimmy; Chris may be allowed to torture us but he can't kill us." Said Quana soothingly. "I wonder how Spider is doing; I hope he's ok."

"You really love him don't you?" Said Jimmy with a smile.

"You know it; he's sweet, he's not afraid to show his feelings, he genuinely cares about me ... what can I say, I'm in love!" Giggled Quana. "Yu know; talking makes me feel better, can you keep talking?"

"Can do." Saluted Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: This is no time to talk about toilet paper.**

**Quana: I felt ok in there … but I wasn't sure about Spider; he has fear of fear. I do hope my little arachnid is alright.**

**Jimmy: At the very least the bats on the ceilings were quite cute.**

**Chris: Dammit! I should have let the bear and sasquatchinaquwa into the cave with the campers. Well; too late now.**

* * *

Xaria opened her eyes and looked around; she could see that she was no longer in the mess hall and that she was now in a place that was rocky with air that smelt oddly dank and damp. She felt something around her left wrist; upon looking it was a pair of handcuffs with attached her to Spider who was currently starting to regain consciousness.

"What the … where are *cough* we? And where is everyone *cough* else?" Asked Spider as he looked around.

"I don't know; but if I had to guess … this is a challenge." Said Xaria with a slight grumble as she noticed a torch and a piece of paper by her feet. "Hmm; what's this?"

"Does it explain *cough* the challenge?" Asked Spider as Xaria read through the letter.

"In one word … yes." said Xaria as she face palmed. "We're currently in the cave system of wawanakwa … so we're underground. The other eight are in a similar situation. Boy; I wonder who got paired up with Kasimar … I feel scared for them."

Spider froze up and started to shake as he wondered if Quana had been paired up with Kasimar; if she had been then what would he do to her?

"Something wrong Spider?" Asked Xaria as she pocketed the letter and spare batteries while turning on the torch and shining it ahead of them.

"Well; I have a fear of fear *cough* itself … and what if Quana is paired up *sneeze* with Kasimar?" Asked Spider in panic.

"Relax Spider; Quana's a tough girl, I'm fairly certain she could beat the crap out of Kasimar if she needs to." Assured Xaria as she and Spider got up and began to walk down the tunnel they were in.

"Thanks Xaria; you're *cough* probably right." Said Spider as he tried to calm himself; he took a breath through his inhaler and pocketed it. "So; what's the challenge exactly; do we *cough* have to get out of the caves?"

"Pretty much; the first two pairs out on the cave win immunity." Shrugged Xaria. "And I'd like the million dollars so I'd therefore like to win immunity today."

"This challenge is pretty *cough* dangerous." Murmured Spider. "Cave ins, possible injuries, bat bites … and there could be snakes in these caves."

"If we had fire this would be easier … but we have nothing to light it with and nothing to burn … and I sure as heck am _not_ walking around topless." Grumbled Xaria.

"I don't blame*cough* you; let's hope we can get out of these *cough* caves quick … gut if we don't win immunity we'll *cough* just have to do better next time." Said Spider as he glanced around and looked at his subterranean surroundings.

"If there is a next time." Pointed out Xaria as they continued on their way.

* * *

**Confessional: Super Mario bros world 1-2 … it was a cave level.**

**Xaria: I hate Chris Maclean with the fiery passion of ten thousand suns!**

**Spider: Yeah; this challenge wasn't really ***cough*** what I'd consider to be ***cough*** fun.**

* * *

Eleanor awoke from her unconscious state and could smell something in the air … it kind of smelt like stones and solid rock. She sat up and looked around; almost immediately she spotted somebody next to her and sighed while silently groaning at being chained to the person.

Sitting up and brushing her hair was Nakia; she glanced at Eleanor and smirked.

"About time you woke up! We've got a challenge to do." Said Nakia rudely.

"I can't exactly help how long I'm unconscious for." Said Eleanor as she straightened her turtle hat. "So; what's the challenge?"

"We've got to find way out of the caves." Said Nakia before she began to whine. "This is so bad! Does anybody here know how bad dank cave air is for my hair? I'll get split ends!"

While Nakia had a whiny strop Eleanor picked up a letter of the ground and quickly read through it.

"Well Nakia; the letter says we have to work together." Said Eleanor as she pocketed the letter and stood up with Nakia. "Whether we like it or not we're a team for this challenge."

"I don't want to work with you! You're ugly, stupid and you have those little rats in your cabin!" Whined Nakia pathetically. "Where did you find them? The sewer?"

"I don't really like you either." Said Eleanor as she ignored the question. "But maybe for this challenge we should form a truce … deal?"

Eleanor held out her hand for a shake; after a moment of thought Nakia looked at Eleanor in disgust.

"I'm not touching your hand! I'll get rat germs!" Spat Nakia haughtily. "Now let's get a move on; I don't want to lose anymore than I want split ends … as in not at all!"

Eleanor walked alongside Nakia silently while turning on the torch and pointing it in front of them so they could find their way around.

"_This is gonna be a __**loooooong**__ day … or night as I don't know what time it is_." Thought Eleanor to herself as she and the spoiled brat walked along the dark passage ways of the caves.

* * *

**Confessional: Pikmin 2 had a lot of caves to explore.**

**Eleanor: Nakia's constant whining was annoying … but the way she kept insulting my ferrets and my friends irritated me even more.**

**Nakia: **(She is whining).** I hated those caves! And I hate Eleanor! … I also hate Spider because he's so ugly and completely unpopular! I can feel my hair start to die when I'm around these losers for too long at a time.**

* * *

Kasimar was afraid; he had been knocked out by some sort of gas and now he was somewhere in what seemed to be a cave. He was also chained up to Barney who was currently knocked out. Kasimar let out a very pathetic whimper.

"I want my mommy." Whimpered Kasimar as he rocked back and forth in fear while his eyes darted around in case something was lurking in the darkness waiting to attack him.

Kasimar promptly stopped his cowering when he heard a groan next to him. Barney sat up and rubbed his head.

"Whoa; it's darker than the deepest ocean in here." Said Barney as he looked around before his eyes landed on Kasimar and then the cuffs keeping them together. "I can't help but feel this is a little wrong yaaaar."

"Well I don't like it either asswipe!" Said Kasimar in his characteristic snarling voice. "When I find Chris I'm gonna castrate him with a switchblade and then make him eat his hairy-."

"So where are we minnow boy?" Asked Barney as he looked around the dark save chamber that they were in.

"Where does it look like we are Sherlock? We're in a dark cave underneath Wawanakwa!" Screamed Kasimar in rage. "Isn't in obvious?"

"… Have you been crying?" Asked Barney in amusement as he noticed the redness around Kasimar's eyes.

"Shut the hell up Little Miss Blue Eyes!" Snarled Kasimar as he stood up and yanked Barney to his feet while taking a torch and a note from his large pockets. "Read this and maybe you'll see what is going on."

Barney read through the note even with the small amount of light and frowned.

"That scoundrel of a swordfish!" Cursed Barney. "This challenge wasn't thought through very well; somebody could get hurt yaaaar!"

"Yeah; personally I hope Lavender or Bug are crushed by a rock fall." Chuckled Kasimar.

"Don't insult by friends." Warned Barney.

"Or what? You'll sing a sea shanty?" Taunted Kasimar mockingly.

"No … I'll break your nose and I'll sing the SpongeBob Squarepants theme song very badly!" Threatened Barney.

"… You wouldn't." Said Kasimar as he narrowed his eyes.

"Yohohoho! Try me." Smirked Barney.

"…Whatever." Frowned Kasimar.

"Ok … back to adventure!" Announced Barney.

"We're not going anywhere; who knows what dangerous monsters Chris has released into the caves." Said Kasimar as he refused to move.

"Ok; we'll do it the hard way yaaaar." Shrugged Barney.

Barney began to walk along and immediately gained the upper hand on Kasimar and started dragging the bully behind him; after a moment of dragging Kasimar started walking normally and looked at Barney in loathing.

"I _**hate**_ you_." _Whispered Kasimar with loathing.

* * *

**Confessional: Any cave with Kasimar is a cave of beasts!**

**Barney: Kasimar is really hard to work with savvy? It got worse.**

**Kasimar: I'd like to have the pirate voted off tonight … but I guess I'll wait until less people remain so that my alliance has the voting advantage … and I could easily threaten somebody into voting with me.**

* * *

Chris sat in the in camera monitor room watching all the action unfold before him with a front row seat. Chris laughed sadistically as he took a sip of a nice hot relaxing latté.

"Man this is great! It's even better than cable." Laughed Chris as he relaxed in his chair while watching Kasimar and Barney insult each other. "I wonder if anyone will kill their partner."

Chris set out another sadistic cruel laugh as he turned to the camera and flashed his pearly white teeth.

"So the final ten are in five groups of two. Who will manage to escape the cave and win immunity? Who will be the first of the final ten to get voted off? Will anyone get into a fight? And who makes these lattés because quite frankly they taste like a massage in a cup! Find out most of these questions after the break when we return to Total Drama Letterz."

* * *

I personally think that this challenge is a lot more dangerous than a lot of the others, even the animal wrangling challenge. If somebody is injured nobody can help them. But nasty people like Chris Maclean don't give a rat's ass about anybody in the world but themselves.

So who is going to win immunity and who will get voted off? Find out in the next chapter at which point for the first time the total number of remaining campers will be reducing to mere single digits!

Here are the teams for this challenge is case you've already forgotten.

Lavender and Tabitha

Jimmy and Quana

Spider and Xaria

Eleanor and Nakia

Barney and Kasimar


	44. Day 20, Part 2, Cavern Catastrophe

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his awesomely awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains the 'knee of justice', spider webs, an accidently revealed secret, a big fight, a slap, a sadistic host who suffers a groin attack, and dark caves. You have been warned though it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Crag's interesting fact: **I have never told this to anyone before but … one of the female campers in this story is a lesbian. Bet you didn't know that! The lesbian's identity will be revealed in due time … but until then … can you guess who it is?

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Poll Results: **The poll is now closed; here are the results on who you, the fans, want to see win. Barney is in first place with four votes, Spider and Tabitha tie for second with three votes each, Jimmy and Quana tie for third with two votes each, Eleanor, Kasimar, lavender and Xaria tie for fourth with one vote each … and unsurprisingly (in my opinion) Nakia is last and doesn't have a single vote. It's interesting to see who you are rooting for. This poll will return when we get down to the final five.

**Note: **Milestone reached! Total Drama Letterz now has over ten thousand hits! WOOT!

Now … I seriously apologize for the lateness of this chapter. There were a number of reasons that I hope are valid and will disperse the angry mob that is likely wielding pitchforks and flaming torches. Here are the reasons the chapter was delayed.

Number 1) LittleBigPlanet 2; particularly the littlebigplanet central contests.

Number 2) A slight lack of inspiration.

Number 3) Sleeping difficulties.

Number 4) Have you forgiven me yet? ;(

So that is why the chapter was late. However; it's here now so the wait is obviously over. Read on and enjoy it everyone! And maybe, just maybe, if you enjoy it you could be so kind as to leave a review, I'll respond to them if I get time!

A good marriage is apparently like eating an orange…

* * *

Chris was leaning back in his comfy chair in the camera control room; he was watching the monitors which showed the ten contestants in their five groups of two fumbling around in the dark caves looking for a way back to the surface.

Chris pretended to have only just noticed the camera and gave a wave.

"Welcome back to day twenty of Total Drama Letterz! If you are only just joining us you've missed the beginning of the most dramatic challenge yet!" Said Chris with a sadistic smirk. "The final ten have been chained up in pairs and are currently underground and are trying to find their way back to the surface of the island. This challenge might end up with somebody dying or crying … but all the better for ratings! Haha! Let's rejoin the five pairs and see how they are getting along … the worse the better! Haha!"

As Chris leaned back in his chair and began to drink a hot relaxing latté Chef glanced at Chris angrily as he sweeped up a mountain of discarded Latté cups.

"Lousy pretty boy; making me clean up the mess he made." Grumbled Chef Hatchet angrily. "His head is bigger than the wart mama had on her toes in nineteen eighty two!"

"I didn't need to know that!" Flinched Chris from his seat. "Now get back to sweeping; this mess isn't going to clean itself up!"

Chef frowned and continued sweeping very reluctulently.

"… … … Noob!" Growled Chef.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "I'm not a Noob! I'm not I'm not I'm not! Waaaaah!"

* * *

**Confessional: Everyday people sign up for World of Warcraft … that means plenty of noobs and thus easy kills in PVP mode!**

**Chris: **(He is crying like a whiny little baby).** I'm not a noob! I'm a pro!**

**Chef: Yeah; a pro at being a noob! Yahahaaar!**

* * *

Tabitha and Lavender were walking along a cave passage. Tabitha held out her W.H.M (Windows Handheld Mailbox) while Lavender held out the torch. The light sources brightened the surroundings of the two teenage girls a bit but the caves still weren't fully illuminated.

"I can easily see why some people are afraid of the dark." Said Tabitha as she and Lavender followed the path along the caves.

"Like Gary?" Asked Lavender as she remembered the Chef's fear from the phobia challenge fifteen days ago.

"Oh yeah; I don't blame him." Said Tabitha as she looked around and shone her W.H.M out in front of her. "Oh crap."

"What? Did you see something dangerous?" Asked Lavender as she glanced up ahead.

"Worse … there is a fork in the path." Said Tabitha as she gestured a short distance up ahead. "We've got to choose which way to go."

"Oh look; Chris has even put some signs up for us." Noted Lavender as they got closer.

And Lavender was right; there were two signs, one said 'horrible death' and pointed left while the other said 'free ice cream' and pointed right.

"Obviously we have to go left." Said Lavender with an eye roll. "Chris is trying to use reverse psychology on us. Yeah, nice try Chris!"

With no hesitation Lavender and Tabitha headed down the left path of the caves. And let me tell you … they had chosen wisely.

* * *

**Confessional: Left isn't right, right isn't left either!**

**Lavender: Yeah; I'm pretty good at detecting reverse psychology. It is possible to trick me but person would have to be really smart … and Chris doesn't fall into that category in any way whatsoever.**

**Tabitha: Well it's better than Hector's left hand right hand logic he used in the boat race right?**

**Chris: **(He is growling in great anger).** Damn it! How could that stupid cheerleader be so smart? Why didn't they go right? They would have run straight into a clown! And what is scarier than clowns right?**

* * *

"So Tabitha; why did you bring that handheld mailbox here with you if you can't get any signal?" Asked Lavender curiously.

"So I could talk to my parents once I get to the playa; you know, let them know how well I did and what happens off camera and behind the scenes." Explained Tabitha as she glanced ahead. "You know; stuff that would only be shown on the uncut DVD which probably won't be released for a while."

"I'm definitely going to buy the DVD when it comes out." Said Lavender as she briefly shone the torch to the ceiling after hearing a bat squeak. "Maybe I'll get it for free since I'm a contestant."

"I wouldn't count on it; the only thing Chris loves more than his hair is money." Said Tabitha before blinking. "Actually … forget that; he probably likes nothing more than his hair."

"He's kind of like Nakia in a way." Mused Lavender as the ground began to slope upwards a little.

"Nakia's grudge on Spider is pathetic." Said Tabitha truthfully. "He did nothing to her and her little tiny brain cannot comprehend that she isn't the center of attention."

"They say pride is the worst of the seven deadly sins." Said Lavender casually. "Nakia should try some humility. I wonder how Quana and Eleanor can tolerate her."

* * *

**Confessional: Tolerance is golden like Ancient Egypt's currency.**

**Lavender: All I know is that that if Nakia was bunking with me I'd throw her out even faster than Quana and Eleanor do.**

**Tabitha: I mentioned letting Nakia bunk with me; it'll just make me seem nicer in Lavender's red eyes. And as she's a threat it'll make sense to get on her good side so she won't vote for me if she ever held the deciding vote at a ceremony.**

* * *

"It may come as a surprise to you … but currently Nakia is bunking with me." Said Tabitha in a casual tone.

Lavender looked quite surprised at this revelation and looked incredulous.

"And you are still sane exactly how?" Asked Lavender. "More importantly; why are you letting her bunk with you?"

"Well it's the right thing to do … and I don't exactly want her to get sick from the cold." Reasoned Tabitha. "I consider myself charitable; or at least when I can be … and this was one of those situations where I could be."

"… That was nice of you." Said Lavender sounding impressed. "But I don't think Nakia really deserves it."

"Better her than Kasimar." Shrugged Tabitha.

All Lavender could do was nod in agreement.

* * *

**Confessional: I agree; Kasimar doesn't even deserve to be supplied with toilet paper!**

**Lavender: Tabitha seems pretty nice; it's kind of a shame she's lost all her team mates. Still; she was a very good teammate in that stupid challenge.**

**Tabitha:** (She is smirking confidently).** Whether they are big or small, smart or dumb, good or evil … I have them all practically eating out of the palm of my hand.**

* * *

Jimmy and Quana had made some progress through the caves but were still trying to find a way out. Quana shone the torch ahead as they ambled along the dark subterranean passages. They were in conversation as talking to each other was keeping them at ease.

"A lot of people seem to have the belief that rich people are evil." Said Jimmy disapprovingly. "But I can attest to the fact that Pablo is a nice guy; most of the kids in the neighborhood are nice but we do have disagreements every now and then."

Jimmy trailed off and seemed to have remembered something that make him chuckle quietly in amusement.

"Disagreements such as?" Prompted Quana curiously.

"One time Ted decided to get in the teachers good books and form our own version of the police … but it was called the 'Grammar Police'. I still don't even know where Ted got the tazer from." Mumbled Jimmy as he thought back to the previous summer. "Ted's knuckleheaded shenanigans, or as he likes to call them 'Harebrained schemes', seem to land us into a lot of trouble sometimes."

"Why don't you call them harebrained schemes?" Asked Quana.

"If they were harebrained then they'd be clever." Shrugged Jimmy. "But I always follow his leadership even if disaster and mayhem are inevitable as that's what friends are for."

"Out of curiosity; you're splitting the money five equal ways between you right?" Asked Quana.

"Yes; why do you ask?" Asked Jimmy wondering what Quana was getting at.

"Well; if you are going to buy the local candy store … what are your friends going to buy?" Inquired Quana. "I don't believe you've told anyone."

"I'm not entirely sure … but I may have a general idea." Said Jimmy in thought. "Charles would probably buy books and stuff like a microscope. I'm pretty certain Ricky would buy a motorbike and maybe buy tickets for many demolition derbies. Pablo might put some away for college and possible pay for us to have a vacation around the world."

"What about Ted?" Asked Quana awaiting an amusing answer.

"Heck if I know; he'd probably buy a leather jacket to look the part and use more to buy components for his latest scheme to get rich … well, richer." Said Jimmy sounding amused with his own prediction. "He'd also buy tickets to a soccer game."

"I never cared much for soccer myself." Said Quana as she glanced ahead. "I don't see the big deal … but I'm no jock so I guess I probably wouldn't understand it anyway."

"There's a fork in the path." Said Jimmy suddenly.

"Aw nuts; which way should we choose?" Asked Quana with a grumble.

"No; I really mean a fork." Said Jimmy as he held up a slightly dirty fork. "Maybe Chef Hatchet came this way earlier."

"At least we know that we're going the right way." Said Quana in optimism.

* * *

**Confessional: Why a fork in the road? Why not a knife or a spoon or a ladle?**

**Jimmy: It's a shame there was no wind in the cave or we would have known which way to go immediately. Chris definitely likes making the challenges hard.**

**Quana: I remember watching that episode last season where the final four were left in the dark woods. What we did was probably worse; and it just felt creepy with all the bats watching us.**

**Chris:** (He looks very smug).** I strive for perfection and rarely repeat myself! Haha!**

* * *

"Why did we have to been chained up anyway?" Asked Jimmy as he gestured to the chain keeping him and Quana together. "Is there really any point to it? To me it has as much point as a blunt pencil."

"Well; you know Chris. He's a self admitted sadist and proud of it." Said Quana before thinking for a moment. "But at least it prevents us from getting lost right? I wouldn't want to be lost and alone in these dark caves."

"Agreed." Said Jimmy as they came up to a real fork in the road. "It's pretty obvious we'll go left as the path to the right has caved in."

"I just hope that we weren't originally supposed to go right." Murmured Quana. "Or maybe Chris made it cave in on purpose to unnerve us."

"Is he allowed to do that?" Asked Jimmy. "I don't want to end up like Crush in Spyro 2."

"What happened to him?" Asked Quana as they set off down the left path.

"He got crushed by a few tons of boulders." Replied Jimmy before changing the subject. "But at the moment I don't think video games are important. I feel concerned for everyone else."

"Even Kasimar and Nakia?" Asked Quana.

"I may not like them but I wouldn't want them to die." Replied Jimmy.

"You know … I agree." Smiled Quana. "Though I think it's ok to worry less about Kasimar in particular after all that he's done."

"He always seems to target those who cannot fight back most of the time." Noted Jimmy. "Why is that?"

"Because he's a coward and he can't handle pain." Explained Quana as she thought back to the torture challenge. "I just hope whoever is chained to him is capable of fighting back."

"I really hope Eleanor isn't chained to him." Gulped Jimmy. "Besides me she's the youngest and Kasimar likes bullying the smallest people usually."

"Don't worry; I'm sure Eleanor's alright." Said Quana soothingly. "_At least I really hope so; Chris isn't that mean … is he?_"

* * *

**Confessional: Though evil usually has standards I doubt Chris is that kind of evil.**

**Chris: Damm, damn, dammit and DAMN! Why didn't I tell those mindless and stupid interns to chain Eleanor to Kasimar? All those potential ratings down the drain. Humph!**

**Quana: It's true; I may seriously dislike Nakia and Kasimar … but brutal humiliation is enough, death is **_**way**_** too far.**

**Jimmy: That challenge was darker than the abandoned mansion in the woods we spent Halloween in last summer. … If this were a cartoon there would have been a cutaway gag just then.**

* * *

"You know what would be *cough* useful right about now?" Asked Spider rhetorically as he and Xaria walked along.

"What? An anglerfish to light the way like at the bottom of the sea?" Guessed Xaria as she held the torch out ahead of them.

"No … a few *cough* flash grenades. They would brighten the caves *cough* quite nicely." Wished Spider. "But as it's unlikely we'll find any *cough* military equipment in here I'm not holding out *sneeze* much hope for that."

"The torch is good enough." Shrugged Xaria before adding snarkly. "I'd like to see Chris in these caves with no torch; I would pay money for a front row seat for that."

"What could Chris's *cough* fear be?" Asked Spider. "Maybe it's something silly like being attacked by *cough* talking flashlight batteries during a potato race."

Xaria slowly turned her head towards Spider with a look that clearly said 'WTF?'

"Is that even a real fear?" Asked Xaria incredulously. "That's about as scary as a mud pie."

"Well … it was just a *cough joke." Said Spider as he put a hand to his gut and groaned. "Chris didn't give me a chance to take my after breakfast medication."

* * *

**Confessional: That fear sounds **_**very**_** familiar; where have I heard it before … hmmmm.**

**Chris: Oh #super bleep#! How did they figure out my fear? Well; at least they don't know my middle name, that'd be embarrassing.**

**Spider: I admit it wasn't a very good ***cough*** joke. Still; it was lucky I had my inhaler with ***cough* **me or I would have been in a lot of ***cough* **discomfort.**

**Xaria: It's strange. I'm scared of mind flayers yet not even the worst of the Resident evil monsters make me flinch; even the regenerators weren't that bad … though I did have the thermal scope when I faced them. I always liked my NES but the GameCube was a pretty good purchase.**

* * *

"When I get a million dollars I'm going to bribe some builders to use a wrecking ball on Chris's house." Grumbled Xaria. "I really don't like to chained to people; no offense Spider."

"None taken; I know you *cough* don't mean me and only me; you *cough* mean everybody in general right?" Said Spider in understanding.

"Exactly; I don't like having my personal bubble invaded." Conformed Xaria. "I think the ground is slanting upwards."

Sure enough Spider and Xaria had reached part of the caves that went upwards and therefore closer to the surface. That meant that they were going the right way.

They must have been fairly deep underground as the path went upwards for over a minute; Spider took out his inhaler and breathed with it for a moment or two.

"From this experience I can safely *cough* say I know what The Scream was *cough* screaming about." Mumbled Spider as he pocketed the inhaler.

"The Scream? Isn't that a painting?" Asked Xaria curiously.

"Yep; it was a series of paintings *cough* painted from 1893 to 1910 by Edvard Munch." Explained Spider. "Some say that the meaning is that *cough* life has no meaning. I'd say it means that a person *cough* has realized a sort of _brutal_ truth that they wish they *cough* could forget. I've heard of things I'd have *cough* rather not. Despite that I'd say its one *cough* of my favorite paintings."

* * *

**Confessional: Scooby dooby scream!**

**Spider: I may be sick but it ***cough* **doesn't mean I'm dumb.**

* * *

"Art is ok … but I'm more of an arcade girl." Shrugged Xaria. "I'm not too good at figuring out the meaning of a painting."

"But there is no *cough* real meaning to a painting; it's up to a person's *cough* own interpretation." Said Spider smiling. "Same with *cough* music."

"… I can see why Quana likes you." Said Xaria with a small smile.

Spider blushed and scratched his hair nervously.

"Anyway; I'm trying to think of a way to make sure Kasimar finally goes. He might weasel his way out of elimination once he doesn't have immunity and I don't want to take that chance." Said Xaria with a frown at the thought of her blue mohawked enemy. "Consequently I thought of an idea … but I doubt it would work. Switching the votes; I know cheating is wrong … but…"

"I think it would be acceptable *cough* considering the circumstances." Began Spider before relaying the facet. "But how can you switch *cough* the votes when they are recorded? There is *cough* simply no way."

"That's the problem; but I guess I could just wait for karma to arrive on the scene … but at this point I'm getting impatient." Said Xaria as she crossed her arms and grumbled.

* * *

**Confessional: Looks like there is no chance of 'pulling a Harold'.**

**Chris: … … CRAP! I should have had the foresight to make the votes written on paper; vote switches are great for ratings! Goddammit all!**

**Spider: The longer it takes karma** *cough*** to strike the more brutal the dosage ***cough*** will be.**

**Xaria: Spider was good company but the challenge itself kinda sucked. If it doesn't involve torturing us then Chris is as bland as the color beige.**

* * *

Eleanor shone the torch ahead of her and Nakia; she was feeling exasperated and slightly annoyed at Nakia's constant whining. Nakia hadn't done a single thing to help so far and instead had been brushing her hair and insulting Eleanor's friends. Quite understandably Eleanor was feeling frustrated.

"Nakia; can I ask you a question?" Asked Eleanor as she and Nakia ducked under a low hanging stalactite.

"Prepare to be happy because I am giving you the honor to ask me something." Said Nakia arrogantly.

"Yeah, right." Mumbled Eleanor before speaking in her normal voice. "If I may ask; why do you feel a need to talk about people behind their backs and upset everyone? Does it make you happy?"

"I'm just telling it like it is." Shrugged Nakia indifferently. "In this world we only need the very best, like me. If there is one thing humanity could easily do without it is ugly people and weirdos. Is it wrong to want humanity to succeed? If anything I'm quite a smart person for thinking of future generations."

* * *

**Confessional: I dread to think of your descendants.**

**Nakia: That's how generous I am; I even think of those who have yet to be born and grow their hair.**

* * *

"Actually; the way you bully Spider makes you come across as an unlikable sadist as you seem to really like upsetting him and his friends." Scowled Eleanor. "If you're going to insult somebody why not Kasimar? He deserves it."

"Are you as crazy as you are ugly? I could get hurt!" Whimpered Nakia before she smirked. "Nope; I'd rather insult easy targets who also deserve it."

"In other words you're a coward because you only target those who you know can't defeat you." Said Eleanor before shaking her head disapprovingly. "Pretty weenie."

"Shut up you little brat!" Screamed Nakia as she slapped Eleanor across the face. "I demand you show me the respect that I and my hair deserve! You're just a pitiful ugly peasant."

The slap had actually really hurt Eleanor and her right face cheek had gone a little red in pain. Eleanor managed to say a brave sentence despite this.

"… At least I'm not a coward." Said Eleanor calmly.

Nakia was deadly silent.

* * *

**Confessional: Anybody can be brave no matter what their age.**

**Eleanor: On one hand it felt great to stand up to Nakia. On the other hand the second slap hurt even more than the first one did.**

* * *

SLAP!

Nakia slapped Eleanor and looked pissed off indeed. She threateningly pointed a finger at Eleanor and scowled at her.

"Don't talk, just listen. If you ever talk back to me again I will cripple you, got it?" Said Nakia angrily. "And guess what; you're now number two on my hit list. Once Spider is gone you will be my prime target."

"I just stood up to you; it's no big deal." Said Eleanor bravely as she stopped walking. "Besides; since you slapped me, what's to stop me from standing here and preventing you from winning immunity? If Kasimar keeps up his winning streak chances are that you will be gone."

Nakia was silent for a moment before she smirked evilly and yanked Eleanor after her as she began to walk.

"Maybe so; but I haven't forgotten how you and the others betrayed me back on day three and picked Spider over me. If you were to get me voted off I might just get Kasimar to do something to your little rats, keep that in mind."

Eleanor looked afraid for a moment before she growled at the brat.

"Are you blackmailing me?" Asked Eleanor.

"Blackmail is such an ugly word; let's call it righting the wrongs." Chuckled Nakia. "Besides; lots of people use blackmail all the time. It's really lots of fun!"

"_Someday karma is going to really rain down on you_." Thought Eleanor as she and Nakia walked along the underground passageways. "_Karma's a bitch … and so are you_."

* * *

**Confessional: It's raining cats and karma!**

**Nakia: I think I slapped some sense into her; that'll teach her for being mouthy to her superiors such as me. **

**Eleanor: Why do people like Nakia always get on TV in the first place?**

**Chris: Because they bring in ratings you stupid furry!**

* * *

Barney and Kasimar were walking along in silence; Kasimar was thinking to himself on how he could get rid of Barney. He knew Barney was a lot smarter than he looked so mind games wouldn't work. Barney was also well liked so he couldn't tell lies about him. And Barney was not scared of Kasimar so the bully couldn't intimidate him … so what to do?

"Stop." Said Barney suddenly as they reached the edge of a ledge that dropped down ten meters to a sloped path below them. "Looks like we're going to have to find a way around."

"Why not just jump it? That'd be easier." Grunted Kasimar.

"We're chained up; it would be more difficult to get the required momentum if we're running at different speeds since I'm sure I'm a faster runner than you." Explained Barney.

"Momentum?" Repeated Kasimar.

"It's velocity multiplied by mass." Explained Barney before chuckled. "Did you even get through high school?"

"I know what it is! I'm just surprised someone retarded like you would pay attention in class." Explained Kasimar.

"I'm not retarded; I'm eccentric." Frowned Barney.

"Same thing." Shrugged Kasimar.

"No; it's not, I assure you. I would be grateful if you would stop being such a dickhead for at least a few minutes." Said Barney. "Anyway; I don't see you doing anything worthwhile; all you do is upset people."

"I have the best of both worlds; I'm feared and I'm smart." Said Kasimar before smirking nastily. "And I don't date nymphos with no souls."

Barney froze to the spot and slowly turned to Kasimar with an expression of anger.

"Am I to assume that you are referring to Lavender?" Asked Barney quietly.

"Duh; and I'm just giving you advice dude." Shrugged Kasimar. "You date Lavender and you'll be working 24/7 while she stuffs her face with food at home while watching Jersey Shore and Judge Judy."

"For your own safety I recommend you do not continue this conversation." Said Barney as he stuck his fingers into his ears. "Not listening!"

"Lavender may have nice boobs but that's all she's got going for her." Said Kasimar. "And she's smarter than you even if only barely, girls shouldn't be smarter than their boyfriends."

"Lalalalalalala not listening!" Sand Barney still with his fingers in his ears.

"Oh that's **really** mature." Said Kasimar as he rolled his eyes. "But if you aren't listening you won't mind me saying that Lavender lost her virginity in preschool."

"Actually I WAS listening! On your guard!" Growled Barney in fury as he grabbed Kasimar by the wrists and tried to bring him down to the ground but Kasimar managed to stay standing and held Barney back.

"You know I'm stronger than you." Said Kasimar condescendingly.

"Ok; I didn't want it to have to come to this … but you leave me no choice!" Growled Barney before he took a deep breath and began to sing.

_Who lives in a pineapple under the sea!_

_SpongeBob Squarepants!_

_Absorbent and yellow and pouris is he!_

_SpongeBob Squarepants!_

Kasimar wailed as he put his fingers to his ears and backed away in anger at the annoying song.

"You're dead!" Screamed Kasimar as he lunged at Barney.

Barney and Kasimar fell off their raised platform and fell down to the slope below. They began to roll very quickly downwards in a ball of fists and feet; kind of like a rollerbrawl.

* * *

**Confessional: I smell a Crash Twinsanity reference!**

**Barney: **(He looks a little bruised up).** I love Lavender … and when people start saying things like THAT about her I get really angry. In retrospect I should have pulled us away from the small ravine and THEN kicked his ass … but a life without failure is a life without experience.**

**Kasimar: **(He is injured and a chunk of his blue mohawk is missing). **I have got to stop underestimating that pirate … but the sadistic feeling I get when I seriously upset someone … it feels **_**good**_**. But still; I should avoid Barney for a while; he actually ripped out some of my bloody mohawk! He's like a creepy mixture of Luna Lovegood and Adolf Hitler!**

**Chris: I would have liked to have shown you the fight … but they went into an area with no cameras. Dammit! Well; I should have had the foresight to put them everywhere no matter how unlikely the chances of the camera filming anything.**

* * *

Tabitha and Lavender were still in the caves trying to find a way out; the torch and Tabitha's Windows Handheld Mailbox were shining light on the path ahead, they could see what looked like a dead end coming up.

"Aw crad." Grumbled Lavender as they came up to the dead end. "Now what do we do?"

"Maybe we should turn around and go the other way … though that was about twenty minutes ago so we'd lose a lot of time."

"Dammit … wait; look up there." Said Lavender as she pointed upwards.

Above them was another cave tunnel continuing onwards; that looked like the way they had to go. The problem was that it was about twenty meters above them … so it was looking like the two girls would have to climb up the wall.

"Looks like we're going to have to put our climbing skills to use and pray we don't fall." Said Tabitha with a small groan. "A fall from up there could really cause a lot of injury."

"As usual Chris didn't put much thought into the challenge." Said Lavender with a grumbly sigh. "Well; let's get climbing."

Lavender and Tabitha began to slowly scale and climb up the cave wall to the higher path. This was very much easier said than done as due to being chained together they had to climb slow and in symmetrical sync.

"It's a good thing I'm good at climbing." Said Lavender as she hauled herself up the stone wall. "Though usually in gym class there is a soft landing in case somebody falls."

"If Wawanakwa was a school it would be Bullworth Academy." Said Tabitha as she steadily climbed alongside Lavender. "I hope you aren't scared of heights."

"Nope; I'm fine with being high up; it comes from being at the top of the cheerleader pyramid." Said Lavender calmly as she glanced at the chain keeping them together. "This challenge would be so much easier without this stupid chain keeping us together. It would certainly make climbing this wall a lot more straightforward."

"Name one time when Chris has been easy on us." Grumbled Tabitha. "Every challenge has had some sort of unfair twist to it; like in the Pikmin challenge where you can't go back into the woods once you come into camp; that's why my team lost that challenge."

"Before I came on this show I'd heard reality TV shows were fixed and tilted in favor of who the producers and host want to win; after being here for this long I guess it's true." Frowned Lavender as she climbed up onto solid ground at the top of the wall.

"Surely it'll be worth a million dollars right?" Asked Tabitha as Lavender helped her up. "Thanks."

"No problem; and … maybe the money would be worth it. Though I only have a one in ten chance of winning." Said Lavender as they continued onwards.

"You'll have a bigger chance every time someone is voted off." Pointed out Tabitha. As she took her W.H.M out of her pocket and shone in ahead. "I wonder if any of the others have gotten lost in here."

"Hopefully nobody I care about." Replied Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: This one is for ALL the cheerleaders in the world! Woot!**

**Lavender: In other words I care about everyone to some degree besides Kasimar and Nakia. It would be so easy to vote them out … but they seem to keep winning immunity for some reason. Kasimar is strong so I can understand that … but I never really had the impression Nakia was very competent.**

**Tabitha: Here's a tip to survive in our cruel world. Use flattery and nice words to butter up your opposition. Works every time. That's what dad says anyway.**

* * *

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Manday."

"Manday who?"

"Manday life boats!"

Quana managed to chuckle at Jimmy's joke as Jimmy smiled at his success in making his friend laugh. For the past couple of minutes Jimmy had been telling 'knock, knock' jokes to help pass the time while they looked for a way out of the caves.

"These challenges aren't very fun lately." Said Quana as she pointed the torch ahead and made a flock of bats flutter away. "If I was in charge we'd have a space invaders challenge or maybe making a signal fire, those would be fun and probably a little safer than Chris's challenges."

"Anything is safer than Chris's challenges; he probably thinks that misery builds character and that death and violence is good for ratings." Mumbled Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Was it a lucky guess?**

**Chris: Bingo! Violence and suffering is where all the money is at!**

* * *

"Looks like another fork in the road." Said Quana as she looked ahead. "And this time it isn't a kitchen implement."

Jimmy looked ahead and saw the cave split into two paths; one on the left and one on the right. The path towards the left slanted downwards and probably deeper underground, the path to the right headed upwards though it looked quite long and would be tiring to go up.

"I think we should take the right path." Said Quana reasonably. "We're already underground so if we take the path to the higher ground we'll get to the surface."

"Sounds good to me." Agreed Jimmy. "But it looks quite steep; what happens if one of gets too tired to continue?"

"I could give you a ride on my back." Offered Quana.

"Err; not thanks, I don't think that will be necessary." Said Jimmy sounding a little embarrassed.

"I know; I was just teasing you." Chuckled Quana as she and Jimmy began to walk up the slanted cave pathway. "It's a good thing I don't wear high heels or after this challenge my feet would feel like a pincushion."

"I know; why did it have to be an abandoned cave?" Asked Jimmy rhetorically. "Why not an abandoned theme park? Or an abandoned castle? Or maybe an abandoned sweet shop?"

"You do know an abandoned sweet shop wouldn't have any candy … right?" Asked Quana.

"Well yeah … but I didn't mean completely abandoned." Reasoned Jimmy. "Like in Willy Wonka; everyone thought the chocolate factory was abandoned but in actual fact it was still going strong."

"I liked that book; the oompa loompa songs were quite amusing." Giggled Quana in memory.

* * *

**Confessional: It rhymes on a dime!**

**Quana: Apparently there were two characters removed from the final version shortly before it was published; interesting huh?**

* * *

"So Quana … out of curiosity what's your favorite candy?" Asked Jimmy as they continued up the slope.

"I'd say Vanilla Slices; it's not exactly a candy but it's my favorite sweet food." Answered Quana before sighing longingly. "If only Gary had been on our team; then we could have eaten real food instead of what seems to be a disgusting combination of burnt tires and light bulbs."

"At least we didn't have to eat literally that in the eating challenge." Said Jimmy in relief. "Chris's cooking was even worse than Chef's."

"I bet Patch would still eat it." Smirked Quana.

"… Probably. Heheehee!" Laughed Jimmy.

The teenager and kid shared a mirthful laugh as they reached the top of the slope and continued onwards into the torchlight darkness in search of daylight.

* * *

**Confessional: Patch is such an extreme omnivore … he eats absolutely anything!**

**Chris: Part of me is disappointed Patch was eliminated so early … we got so much cash out of Owen's farts back in the first season; maybe I shouldn't have made the first challenge a free for all so then Patch might not have been voted off. Everyone loves farts!**

**Quana: I've always wondered why young people are entertained by farts; what's the big appeal? Seriously, I don't get it.**

**Jimmy: I remember the time Ted entered me and the others in a pie eating contest … none of us could even **_**look**_** at a pie for six whole weeks after **_**that**_**.**

* * *

"Are we there yet?" Asked Xaria aloud as she and Spider trudged along. "Man; I almost sound like a kid in the backseat of a car during a long journey."

"It's understandable; this *cough* challenge is kind of, well, boring." Said Spider as he shone the torch up ahead as they turned around a corner. "It's like *cough* when play Mario Party by myself, not as *cough* fun as it could be."

"Which Mario Party?" Asked Xaria looking a little interested.

"The original; the mini games are *cough* a lot of fun but I'd prefer to play with multiple *cough* people, it supports up to four players you see." Explained Spider.

"I was aware of that; Mario party sounds quite fun … but lately Nintendo is milking it for all it's worth." Shrugged Xaria.

"That's what big corporations *cough* do." Said Spider truthfully. "Though there is no denying that *sneeze* they've made some great games."

"True; like Super Mario Bros 3." Agreed Xaria as she thought back to when she would play it for hours on end. "I've got a NES and that's the best game for it. Too bad you can't save your game … that's a big problem if you don't know where the warp whistles are."

"Speaking of video games; I've *cough* just realized something." Said Spider with a look of thought on his face.

"Realized what? That Chris is eviler than Wesker?" Asked Xaria.

"No ... well, yes; but also *cough* that you kind of sound like Carrie from the *cough* Monster Madness series." Explained Spider. "The wonders of coincidences *cough* right?"

"… Well; it's better than me sounding like Princess Peach I guess." Shrugged Xaria with a small wry smile. "Oh look; it's lights out."

Spider and Xaria had entered a part of the cave that was pitch black; they could see a small bit of light shining in from up ahead, presumably from a bit of the cave that was near sunlight. Xaria shone the torch ahead and saw what seemed to be a few holes along the ground near them.

"Well; looks like we'll have to watch our step." Said Xaria. "Good thing we have a torch."

As luck and fate would have it the torch chose that particular moment to run out of battery power. Xaria grumbled to herself as she took out another battery and began to blindly insert it into the torch. Just before she did she blinked and gulped.

"Err … Spider…" Said Xaria hesitantly.

"What is it *cough* Xaria?" Asked Spider nervously due to Xaria's worried tone.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but … _please_ tell me it's you I can feel touching my boobs." Said Xaria with a gulp.

"…No; it's not me, I *cough* have more tact than *cough* that." Said Spider as he wrung his hands together nervously.

Xaria managed to insert a new battery into the torch and instantly a small area around them was illuminated; Xaria instantly saw a bat looking up at her from its perch on her breasts.

"AAAH!" Yelped Xaria in surprise as she fell over backwards which made the bat fly away; due to the chain connecting them Spider was pulled down as well though thankfully he did not fall on top of Xaria. "Ouch … you know; I feel a sudden urge to knee Chris in the balls for putting us through this."

"You'll have to wait *cough* in line." Said Spider as he breathed with his inhaler before he helped Xaria back to her feet.

* * *

**Confessional: Why does every story have a place where everything is pitch black?**

**Xaria: If I were Chris I'd buy a groin guard. **(Xaria grumbled to herself for a few moments). **At least the bat didn't bite me; I've heard some bats carry rabies.**

**Spider: I wish we could vote off Chris. **

**Chris: Shut up!**

* * *

Nakia shone the torch ahead of her and Eleanor; the cave was becoming slightly brighter and less dark. That could only mean that they were getting near the exit of the caves and therefore closer to winning immunity.

"Ah! It's so nice to be close to winning the challenge." Said Nakia contently. "After all; immunity is something that it is in me best interest to earn."

"True … but we have no way of knowing if we are ahead of the other groups or in last place." Pointed out Eleanor. "Personally I'm hoping we're in last; that way I can vote you off."

"Say whatever you please worm; you have no power in this game." Smirked Nakia airily.

"Neither do you." Replied Eleanor.

"Maybe I don't … but maybe I do." Said Nakia casually.

* * *

**Confessional: Maybe I will buy ice cream … and maybe I won't buy ice cream.**

**Nakia: Take note students; in reality TV, if you control the votes … you control everything. **(Nakia smirks before whining). **Aww no! I have three split ends! I must fix this!** (Nakia takes out her ever present hair brush).

**Eleanor: Was Nakia giving me a subtle hint or was she just trying to inflate her already dangerously large ego? Somehow I have a pinch of doubt she could possibly control the game … then again … most people would think that after having to put up with her for longer than necessary.**

* * *

"Look Nakia; we have to work as a team in this challenge; can't you just try and be nice for a little while?" Asked Eleanor. "It's really not so hard. Being nice to others is a great feeling."

"What do I have to gain from it?" Asked Nakia snootily. "It is better to receive than give."

"I think you mean it's better to give than receive." Said Eleanor with a face palm. "You know; sometimes you don't have to do something just to get a gift in return … do it just because."

"… I'm not seeing the point to that." Said Nakia haughtily before her stopping. "Eek! What's _that_?"

Just a meter or two in front of the girls was a large spider web; it was blocking the way forward and seemed very sticky.

"I would say it's a spider web." Said Eleanor sounding interested. "I wonder what type of spider made that."

"Who cares? It's blocking the way forward so we have to get rid of it!" Barked Nakia.

"Well we shouldn't ruin it because it could still be in use by whatever spider made it; it wouldn't really be very nice." Said Eleanor.

"I repeat myself; who cares?" Asked Nakia dryly. "We've got to get rid of it because the last forked path we came too was about an hour ago."

"… I guess you're right; well, we could walk through it." Suggested Eleanor. "It won't be able to hold us like in movies."

"Not a chance. Do you know what would happen to my hair if something sticky got jammed in it?" Asked Nakia expecting an answer.

"… It wouldn't be 'perfect?" Guessed Eleanor.

"True, but no. It would have to be shaved off!" said Nakia with a small look of pure fear. "I'm not touching that web, end of story!"

"… Well; maybe we could burn it." Suggested Eleanor. "We could create a fire with friction if we rubbed some branches together … and I can see a few branches lying around."

Eleanor picked up two small branches and rubbed them together hard; about half a minute later they caught fire. Eleanor tossed them at the spider web which burned to ash in just a few seconds. Eleanor stomped on the fire to extinguish it and turned to Nakia.

"Thanks for all the help; I could never have done it without you." Said Eleanor sarcastically.

"Oh get bent." Snapped Nakia as she and Eleanor continued onwards in the cave.

* * *

**Confessional: How bent do you want? A ninety degree angle or something?**

**Eleanor: I don't think Nakia could pull her own weight around even if she only weighed a single gram.**

**Nakia: Why do more than is necessary? Extra credit is barely worth it anyway.**

* * *

Barney and Kasimar were in an all our brawl; they rolled along the steep downward slope in a ball of fists, feet and non literal bloodshed. They smashed through a wooden barrier that had been set up for no immediately obvious reason and fell down onto solid ground. They continued brawling along; in fact, they were so focused on beating the crap out of the other that they didn't even notice the warmth and light of sunshine around them.

Barney reared back his legs and shot them at Kasimar full force. This did two things. The first was that it sent Kasimar flying upwards and down onto the grassy ground with a 'thump'. The second was that the chain holding them together snapped.

Kasimar groaned in pain as he propped himself up with his arms; he shook the pain off and immediately saw that they were outside the caves and had crossed the finish line. Kasimar cackled in triumph as he got to his feet.

"Yes! Immunity is mine!" Smirked Kasimar as Chris walked up to him.

"Congratulations Kasimar and Barney; you are the first out of the caves and are immune from votes at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony." Said Chris with his usual smile. "I was kinda worried you wouldn't get immunity this time Kasimar."

"Don't sweat it Chris; I _always_ win." Assured Kasimar.

"Aw crap yaaar." Grumbled Barney as he got to his feet. "This is the sixth time that fiend has won flippin immunity!"

"Oh be happy weirdo; you're immune as well." Said Chris with an eye roll.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm immune to herpes and shark feces.**

**Barney: This challenge was about as fun as cutting off your foot and sticking a stick in it. Sure; I'm immune yaaar … but Kasimar is too. Looks like that shark bait isn't going just yet it seems, yaaar.**

**Kasimar: I'm harder to get rid of than a cockroach; let me tell you! Yahahahahaha!**

* * *

Tabitha ducked down under the mass of ripped spider web on the low hanging ceiling above her. Lavender was doing the same and was covering her red hair with her free hand.

"I hate spiders." Mumbled Lavender. "Not as much as scorpions … but the idea of dying from a painful poison is not very appealing."

"I wouldn't worry; Chris wouldn't have made this island the set of the show without anti venom for the native creatures, he isn't _that_ stupid right?" Asked Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: I thought is IQ was **_**negative**_** five.**

**Chris: **(He looks a little worried). **I knew I was forgetting something! Doh! … Well; too late to do anything now … and what they don't know can't hurt them!**

**Chef: The animals might though.** (Chef shakes his head).

* * *

"You know; I bet this island wouldn't be even nearly as bad as it currently is if Chris wasn't here."

"Possibly; but I wouldn't really want to come here on vacation." Said Tabitha as she and Lavender got out from the low hanging ceiling and were able to stand up. "I'd prefer somewhere like Africa."

"Sounds nice; I have always liked giraffes." Said Lavender while thinking of the African outback. "Imagine if there was a season of Total Drama where the4 contestants go around the world in a jumbo jet."

"Quite frankly I think that would suck." Said Tabitha indifferently.

"…I agree; it probably would suck." Concurred Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: I third that opinion.**

**Tabitha: I don't know why but something about that idea sounds completely stupid.**

* * *

"Hey Lavender; I think the cave is getting brighter, I'd say we're getting near daylight again." Said Tabitha as she noticed the darkness becoming less, well, dark.

"Excellent." Said Lavender as she rubbed her hands together.

"…Were you by any chance imitating Mr. Burns?" Asked Tabitha with a coy look.

"Maybe." Chuckled Lavender. "Now let's get moving; we aren't going to win the challenge just walking slowly are we?"

* * *

**Confessional: Was that a rhetorical question or do you want me to answer that?**

**Lavender: What? So I'm a fan of the Simpsons. Who isn't; that's what I say. I wonder what a Simpsons challenge would be like; hmmm, that'd be kinda funny.**

**Chris: Now why didn't I think of that yet that stupid cheerleader did? I call shenanigans! Shenanigans!**

* * *

"Hey Quana; what's it like being in a relationship?" Asked Jimmy as he and Quana walked along the caves and into a new section that had a little simmer of sunlight in it.

"It's really nice; they say there is the right boy for every girl somewhere out there in the world. I think Spider is most certainly the right guy for me." Said Quana wistfully. "Spider is really nice and he has a cute way of scratching himself when he's nervous. The fact he is a good kisser is an added bonus. Heehee!"

"I don't know if I'll ever understand relationships; they are as complicated as the calculus that Charles sometimes does for fun." Said Jimmy with an amused chuckle.

"You're only ten Jimmy; and you know, I don't think anyone I know fully understands it either." Shrugged Quana with a smile.

"Well Ricky is ten as well and he's got a crush on Elise Pebblebrook." Said Jimmy casually. "He told me it was a secret and … … … oops."

As Quana giggled to herself Jimmy looked up and saw a camera. He nervously waved to it in an apologetic gesture.

"Err … sorry about that Ricky." Said Jimmy with a gulp. "Aw man! Me and my big mouth."

"Don't worry about it Jimmy; Chris might edit it out." Comforted Quana gently.

"I sure hope so." Said Jimmy with a nervous chuckle.

* * *

**Confessional: An unseen character with a crush on an unseen character … d'aaaw!**

**Chris: I could easily edit it out … but I won't! Haha!**

**Jimmy: I never was very good at keeping secrets; I understand why Barney and Spider didn't tell me about spider's crush on Quana. I would have probably blown the secret into the open.**

**Quana: Jimmy's going to make some lucky girl very happy in the future; I'm sure of it.**

* * *

"Now this is more like it." Said Xaria as she and Spider felt a tony bit of sunlight shine on them. "Much better than being in a pitch-black environment."

"True; I may be *cough* pale but even I like the *cough* sunshine." Agreed Spider before glancing at the chain keeping them together. "Was this chain really *cough* necessary? I don't see the *cough* point of it."

"It's because Chris is into BDSM; chaining us together satisfies his sick, twisted fantasies." Explained Xaria with a snarky grin.

* * *

**Confessional: That was **_**WAAAAAY**_** more than I needed to know.**

**Xaria: Oh c'mon! The evidence all points that way! It's as obvious as Stewie Griffin being gay.**

**Chris: Shut up! Man; sometimes I really want to strangle these brats … and then hang them with barbed wire! … I can edit this confessional out, of course ,so whatever I say doesn't actually count. Haha!**

* * *

"That … was more than *cough* I needed to hear." Murmured Spider with a slightly disturbed expression on his face.

"Maybe; but it's just Chris so who the heck cares?" Asked Xaria.

"… Good *cough* point." Chuckled Spider. "It's funny that I don't like him when my favorite villains are incompetent and immature, just like Chris."

"Maybe it's because Chris is like a sponge; he's self absorbed." Shrugged Xaria.

"True; he's got none of the *cough* appeal that SpongeBob *sneeze* has." Said Spider with a hearty laugh. "But you have to wonder; why *cough* is Chris so mean? Was be bullied *cough* when he was young?"

"Nope … he's just a giant douche." Said Xaria flatly.

"… That works *cough* too." Shrugged Spider in agreement. "Oh; and I *cough* think we're nearly out of the caves *cough* judging by the sunlight; sunlight could only *cough* mean that there is an exit *cough* nearby."

"Good to know we're going the right way." Smiled Xaria. "I really want to give Chris the knee of justice."

"What's that?" Asked Spider.

"You'll know it when you see it." Assured Xaria with a smirk.

* * *

**Confessional: Is the Knee of Justice a super hero?**

**Spider: Xaria's snarky dry sense** *sneeze*** of humor is quite endearing and** *gag*** amusing. She's definitely more than** *cough*** a match for Chris.**

**Chris: **(He waves his arms mockingly). **Ooooooooo! What's the big buzzy bumble bee gonna do to me? Phfft! I'd like to see her try something; she'd definitely fail! Haha!**

* * *

"Are we there yet?" Whined Nakia. "I hate hiking!"

* * *

**Confessional: I can't hike because I have no shoes!**

**Nakia: The great outdoors are not so great; though the million dollars is all the incentive I need.**

* * *

"It's not exactly hiking if you are underground … or at least I don't think it is anyway." Said Eleanor with a barely masked sigh of exasperation. "But I can feel the air getting warmer so we're going in the right direction."

"Good; this cave air is too humid and dank for my liking." Said Nakia as she began to brush her hair. "I should sue Chris for defamation!"

"This isn't defamation … and somehow that sounds familiar though I don't know why." Said Eleanor as she scratched her hair in thought.

Eleanor and Nakia rounded a corner and instantly saw daylight ahead; the exit of the caves was about ten measly meters in front of them.

"Alright! We won!" Cheered Nakia as she ran for the sunshine and almost dragged Eleanor behind her.

Eleanor and Nakia ran out of the cave and crossed the finish line; the sun shone warmly down on them as Chris walked up with a key.

"Eleanor and Nakia; you are the second team to arrive; you win immunity." Announced Chris as he uncuffed the two girls. "And boy Nakia; slapping Eleanor is going to make for great ratings!"

"My pleasure." Chuckled Nakia while Eleanor frowned.

"About time somebody else got here." Said Kasimar from nearby while leaning against a tree. "Waiting for others is kind of boring."

"Don't tell me Kasimar is immune _again_." Groaned Eleanor.

"I'm afraid so little mermaid." Said Barney solemnly as he walked up. "And now that Nakia is immune … tonight's vote is going to be hard yaaar."

"At least we're both immune though." Said Eleanor with a small smile.

"You've got a point cabin girl!" Grinned Barney. "And at least you weren't chained up with Kasimar like I was … but I think I beat some manners into the shark crap kid yaaar."

* * *

**Confessional: Next time you should beat him with a can opener!**

**Eleanor: Barney's very eccentric indeed … I bet that's why Lavender likes him.**

**Barney: I wonder what mathematical pi would taste like; blueberry? Apple? Cherry? Star fruit?**

**Nakia: So I'm immune again huh? Good; I can't wait to see the look on that Hispanic Horse's face when she finds out she can't vote me off. **(Nakia laughs obnoxiously).

* * *

"Looks like another pair are here." Said Chris as he looked towards the cave.

Walking out of the cave and into the sunshine was Spider and Xaria. They crossed the finish line and glared at Chris.

"Do you have any *cough* idea how dangerous this challenge *sneeze* was?" Asked Spider with a highly disapproving frown. "There could have been a cave *cough* in or somebody could have gotten really *gag* hurt!"

"I knew all that … but I just didn't care! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he uncuffed Spider and Xaria.

"We better have immunity." Glared Xaria.

"… Nope! Haha! You are the third pair to arrive and as such you do not pass go and do not receive immunity." Smirked Chris. "Now just wait around for a little while; it won't be long before the other two pairs are here. It's going to be sunset soon so for there sake they should get a move on. Well; unless they like being in a pitch black cave anyway! Haha!"

"… You're the devil." Said Xaria flatly as she walked over to a nearby log and sat on it while crossing her arms.

Spider grumbled to himself but upon seeing who else was out of the cave managed to smile about one thing.

"At least Quana wasn't chained *cough* up with Kasimar." Said Spider positively. "… But Kasimar and Nakia *cough* have immunity … oh dear."

"Don't worry Spider." Said Eleanor as she walked up beside Spider. "Their luck is going to run out sooner or later."

"They have more lives *cough* than a giant shelter of *sneeze* cats." Lamented Spider.

Eleanor giggled at the joke and smiled.

"Good one Spider." Smiled Eleanor sweetly.

"Heh; thanks." Said Spider modestly.

* * *

**Confessional: Wasn't that joke in a review or something? I guess real life really does write the plot.**

**Spider: I may not have won** *cough*** immunity … but I think that** *gag*** it wasn't anywhere near as bad as the eating** *sneeze*** challenge or the pinball challenge. Though this wasn't anywhere near** *cough*** my favorite challenge.**

**Eleanor: On one hand I was able to see some fascinating bats and interesting rock formations … on the other hand Nakia slapped me twice. My opinion of this challenge could go either way.**

* * *

Lavender and Tabitha were running at a decently speedy pace through the caves; they could feel warm sunlight coming from further ahead. It would have been easier if not for the stupid chain keeping them together, but as we all know Chris loved making things difficult for other people.

"How much further?" Asked Tabitha as she ran alongside Lavender.

"Not much further; I'd say less than a minute of running to go." Replied Lavender. "Though we might not win as we've got no way of knowing what position we are in until we exit the cave."

"I'm hoping we're in first." Said Tabitha hopefully. "Though I suppose that second place might possibly do."

"As long as we win immunity we can rest easy." Voiced Lavender as they rounded a corner. "And look ahead; what do you see?"

"I see the exit from the caves and the entrance to the surface!" Cheered Tabitha in relief.

The two teenagers ran full speed forwards; they sped out of the cave and over the finish line. As they did they were overcome by a wave of disappointment. They saw six of the others standing around which meant immunity had already been given out.

"Darn it!" Pouted Lavender in irritation. "We're too late!"

"You got that right ditzy!" Laughed Chris as he uncuffed Lavender and Tabitha. "Fourth place out of five; not too impressive."

"I guess we'll just have to try harder next time; eh Lavender?" Said Tabitha as she smiled at being able to move without dragging Lavender along.

"Good point." Said Lavender while glaring at Chris. "It's been nice working with you Tabitha; now if you'll excuse me I'm going to see Barney."

As Lavender left to speak with her boyfriend Tabitha silently chuckled to herself and smirked.

* * *

**Confessional: Nobody has made out in me all season … I feel so lonely!**

**Tabitha: I may not have won … but I don't think I'm in too much danger of being voted off. Lavender won't vote for me; and now I have her trust. This show is kind of like a game of chess in a way to be honest; I'm the chess master and everyone else is a pawn.**

**Lavender: I wonder what game is better; Chess or Snooker. What do you guys think?**

* * *

"Looks like we're just waiting for Quana and Jimmy and then we're good." Said Chris as he glanced at his watch. "And I'm getting really, really bored so they had better hurry up!"

"Rome wasn't built in a day." Muttered Lavender.

"If I was their pharaoh it would be." Smirked Chris.

"Romans had emperors, not pharaoh's dumbass yaaar." Said Barney idly.

"… … … Shut up!" Snapped Chris.

"Whoa, _that_ was a good comeback, not." Said Lavender sounding amused.

"Shut uuuuuup!" Whined Chris.

"Yaaar! I have to say that annoying Chris is a lot of fun." Laughed Barney merrily.

"Aw man; looks like we're in last." Said Jimmy as he and Quana crossed the finish line. "What did we miss?"

"Just Chris whining and having a small temper tantrum." Replied Eleanor.

"It pains me to see a grown man cry." Said Jimmy with a shake of his head.

"As it does to me." Agreed Quana as she walked over to Spider. "Sp Spider; did you win immunity?"

"Sadly no; me and Xaria *cough* came third." Said Spider in disappointment though he cheered up when Quana hugged him.

"So who won immunity?" Asked Quana.

"Err … well; it was-." Began spider before Chris took out an air horn and pressed the button.

HOOOOOOONK!

"Aaaaargh!" Wailed Nakia as she held her ears. "Are you trying to make me death? Was that funny to you or something?"

"Yes; yes it was." Nodded Chris with a sadistic chuckle. "Anyway; nobody can tell anyone else the results until we get back to camp; it's more professional that way."

"I don't see how." Said Jimmy.

"Just shut up and bare with me." Said Chris irritable as he pointed to the south. "Camp is this way so let's get going; I seriously need a latté and a full body massage."

* * *

**Confessional: I'd like a full body massage … except that I don't have a body, being that I'm an outhouse and all.**

**Jimmy: I have a nasty suspicion on who won immunity … I guess I'll just have to hope I'm wrong.**

**Quana: Sure, I didn't win immunity … but I think I'll be safe from getting voted off tonight. Hopefully neither Nakia or Kasimar won immunity.**

**Nakia: **(She is brushing her hair). **Aren't I such a superstar huh?**

* * *

The ten campers stood in camp center while Chris paced before them as though he was waiting for the right moment to speak.

"Well you lot; the challenge is over and there are clear winners and losers. Four of you have won immunity and a free pass into the final nine while six of you have a chance of being voted off tonight." Said Chris as he stopped pacing. "So; without further stalling by use of my magnificent voice … it's time to announce the results. So who came fifth? Who came fourth? Who came third? Who-."

"Get on with it!" Snapped Kasimar as he stood with his arms crossed with an impatient look on his face.

"…fine!" Frowned Chris. "In fifth place are Jimmy and Quana, in fourth place are Lavender and Tabitha and in third place are … Spider and Xaria."

"Oh no; then that means…" Groaned Quana.

"And that means that in second place and immune are Eleanor and Nakia. And thus in first place with immunity and the special prize are … Barney and Kasimar! Haha!" Laughed Chris at the displeased looks on the faces of most of the contestants.

Kasimar cheered and Nakia smirked smugly though none of the others shared their enthusiasm.

"Ok then; today's special prize is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A pair on hand cuffs each!" Announced Chris dramatically as he handed Barney and Kasimar a pair of hand cuffs each. "Enjoy your prize!"

"I don't want this crap; what good are handcuffs?" Asked Kasimar as he tossed his pretty worthless prize a distance away.

"Whatever; well then, basically you all know who is immune and who is votable." Said Chris as he looked over the ten contestants. "Everyone cast your votes and report to the Bonfire pit in one hour; for one of you it will be your last hour. Now if you losers will excuse me it's time for my twelfth daily massage."

Chris left like he always did and the campers dispersed to kill time until the bonfire ceremony.

* * *

**Confessional: vote for the next president! … Err … I mean, vote for the next loser; yes, that's it!**

**Jimmy: I'm voting for Xaria. I like her and all … but she's a really strong competitor and I'd like equal odds in the challenges.**

**Lavender: I think I'll vote for Spider; nothing personal but out of those votable he's the only candidate I can think of; and after working with Tabitha I can't really vote for her can I?**

**Spider: I vote Tabitha; I'm just not** *cough*** as close to her as I am the** *cough*** others … and as Nakia and Kasimar are both** *cough*** immune she's the only person I can really vote** *cough*** for.**

* * *

The ten remaining campers sat on logs and stumps around the bonfire pit; it was quite a beautiful night; it would have been more beautiful if Kasimar was going to be voted off but sadly that wasn't going to happen. As the stars twinkled in the sky Chris arrived with a tray of nine marshmallows. He set them down on the oil drum and gazed upon the campers.

"Well everyone; it's finally time. After tonight for the first time in this season only a single digit number of campers will remain. I'd say good job for getting this far … but I don't really like you. Anyway you all know how this works by now. When I call your name come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe from elimination. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must _immediately_ walk the dock of shame … and board the boat of losers … and you can't ever, ever, ever come back … ever!"

Chris yelled the last word but none of the campers flinched or jumped as they were used to hearing that by now.

"The first four marshmallows go to those who won immunity in today's challenge."

"Kasimar"

"Barney"

"Nakia"

"Eleanor"

The four challenge winners got up and collected their marshmallows and prepared to watch the rest of the ceremony.

"As for the rest of you; here are the people who are going to be staying for at least one more day." Said Chris as he began to hand out the marshmallows.

"Lavender"

"Jimmy"

"Quana"

"Spider"

One marshmallow remained; Tabitha and Xaria sat on their stumps, both girls looked confident.

"Tabitha, Xaria … this is the final marshmallow of the night." Said Chris dramatically. "Whichever of you does not get this is out of the game and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … and you can't come back ever and this time I mean it."

Tabitha and Xaria exchanged a glance as Chris held up the final marshmallow for them to see.

"The final marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Tabitha."

Tabitha got up and took her marshmallow while Xaria sat on her stump marshmallowless and sighed to herself.

"I guess that's it for me then." Said Xaria sounding a little disappointed.

"Yep! Goodbye bumble bee! Go and fly back to your hive and pig out on honey! Then again you aren't really sweet so you might be a bumble wasp! Haha" Laughed Chris as he sadistically taunted Xaria. "See you around bumble bee! I hope somebody tears your wings off! Haha!"

Xaria growled angrily as she walked over to Chris.

"Hey Chris; I've got three words for you." Said Xaria with sudden calmness.

"What are they bumble bee?" Asked Chris in a bored tone.

"…Knee of justice!" Declared Xaria.

In one swift motion Xaria kneed Chris in the balls with all the strength she could muster. Added to the fact Xaria had very strong knees meant this knee to the crotch tactic … hurt a **_LOT_**.

"…AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Chris as he held his 'babies' in pain as he hopped around in agony while he screamed and tears streamed down his face as he cried.

"Whoa; so _that_ was the *cough* knee of justice." Said Spider sounding impressed.

"Yep … and that reminds me." Said Xaria as she turned to face Kasimar.

Kasimar realized what was about to happen and gulped.

"I'm outta here!" Wailed Kasimar as he took off running back to camp.

"Now I can leave this horrible island with no regrets." Said Xaria sounding content. "See you around everyone."

Everyone besides Nakia waved goodbye to Xaria as she walked the dock of shame and boarded the boat of losers with her head held high. The boat sped off into the night which meant only nine campers remained.

"Waaaaaaah!" Sobbed Chris as he clutched his balls in pain.

"… You totally had that one coming." Said Lavender with a laugh. "Good for Xaria."

* * *

Chef stood on the dock of shame with his arms crossed.

"As pretty boy is still crying over getting kneed in the testicles I've got to do the outro. So … basically Xaria has been voted off and Kasimar has once again got lucky. We're in the final nine which is a small number I guess. So … who will be the next person voted off? What will the next challenge be? Will something dramatic happen? And will anybody ever appreciate my cooking? I guess you might find this out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Barney: Xaria

Eleanor: Tabitha

Jimmy: Xaria

Kasimar: Xaria

Lavender: Spider

Nakia: Xaria

Quana: Tabitha

Spider: Tabitha

Tabitha: Xaria

Xaria: Tabitha

Xaria: 5

Tabitha: 4

Spider: 1

* * *

Voted Off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria.

* * *

And Xaria is gone. It's a shame really as I was quite fond of Xaria; her cynical snarky attitude was very fun to write for. Originally Xaria would have been eliminated before the merge … but because people liked her and I found that I really enjoyed writing for her I made her stay longer and fleshed out her character. She is gone now but won't be forgotten, Chris certainly won't forget her anyway!

Now we are down to nine campers; for the first time in the story the total number of campers still in the game has hit single digits. We're coming to the home stretch everyone and it's going to get a lot more dramatic from now on.

Next time: It'sa time for'a Mario Party mini'a games! Woohoo!


	45. Day 21, Part 1, Wawanakwa Party

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his super duper story Total Drama Alphabet. While I'm at it I do not own the Mario Party series or any of the mini games used in this challenge. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story, so I would be grateful if you did not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains an octopus, a game of footsies, talking about baby ferrets, a sadistic host, nine campers having to hold their breath under water, jelly beans and a horrible bully. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Crags interesting Fact: **Hector, The intellect, was originally going to place eighth in the earliest planning's of the story. However … I found that not only did I not really enjoy writing for him very much but also he wasn't a very popular character … so I eliminated him MUCH earlier than what I had originally planned. Bet you didn't know that!

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **Only nine campers remain; we are near the end of the story. Less than twenty chapters remain to be written. This story is now one of the longest in the entire Total Drama Fandom … and the way things are going it might just end up being the longest. Basically … what I'm trying to say is that writing this story is a VERY fulfilling hobbie. The reviews that you guys leave give me the motivation to keep writing. I'm aiming to have at least one hundred reviews by the time the story is completed; so if you like what you read why not leave a review. The story may be starting to draw to a close but there is a lot of drama still to happen; particular in the near future… Now let's get day twenty one started!

It'sa time for Mario Party! Woohoo!

* * *

It was early morning on Wawanakwa Island. Birds were chirping good morning to each other and the less than savory monsters were saying hello breakfast to the birds. It was, in short, an average morning on the island of Wawanakwa.

Chris stood on the dock of shame wearing a sort of party outfit that resembled how Elvis Presley would usually dress, white jacket and all. Chris waved to the camera and with grand gestures with his arms he began his once per episode recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. I decided to see if any of the campers were afraid of the dark; I did this by tranquilizing them, chaining them into pairs and leaving them underground in Wawanakwa's cave system. They had a torch to light the way and a small amount of back up batteries. And since only ten campers remained in the game it was quite logical and justified that the challenge was hard."

"Some of the pairs got along with each other quite well, much to my dismay. Jimmy and Quana as well as Xaria and Spider both got along with ease which is bad for ratings. Tabitha and Lavender also got along though Tabitha only did so to make Lavender her pawn. On the other end of the 'getting along with each other scale' were Eleanor and Nakia and also Barney and Kasimar. While Nakia slapped Eleanor and generally acted really mean Barney and Kasimar got into a fight and beat the crap out of each other! Awesome TV dudes! Haha!"

"Barney and Kasimar, by both luck and chance, managed to win the challenge in first place. Kasimar was quite happy but Barney was frustrated Kasimar was immune again, touch luck weirdo! Haha! Eleanor and Nakia came second which also granted them immunity and thus they had a free pass into the final nine. However; the other three pairs were not as lucky; due to finishing third and under Jimmy, Lavender, Quana, Spider, Tabitha and Xaria were up for elimination and a one way ticket to loserville, population soon to be seventeen! Haha!"

"It was a close vote at the bonfire ceremony; Spider received a single vote, Tabitha earned four … but with a majority of five votes, three from Tabitha's alliance, it was Xaria who was voted off. But that little brat! She could have been a good sport and let me insult her … but no! She kicks me in the balls and calls it the 'knee of justice'. I hope to see that girl face down in a lake someday. Grrrr!"

Chris took a few deep breaths to calm himself down and managed to smile for the camera.

"Only nine campers are left on the island; only eight more episodes and the champion will be crowned and the rest will see their better. But we still have a while to go until then! Who will be voted off this time? What will Tabitha's next strategic move be? Will Kasimar put the moves on any more of the girls? And who is the most skilled at mini games? Find out of the answers to all of these questions, and maybe even more, right now in the hopefully most exciting episode yet of Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme Song, I Wanna Be Famous)

* * *

Lavender was sunbathing on the beach in her red bikini; after the previous challenge she felt she could do with some relaxation and was making the most of the time between the challenges. The sun was nice and warm on her skin and Lavender felt pleased that she had made it to the final nine.

"Mmmm; this is nice." Smiled Lavender to herself as she relaxed in the warm sunshine.

"Ahoy! Morning Lavender." Waved Barney as he walked up to his girlfriend and sat beside her.

"Hey Barney." Greeted Lavender cheerfully. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yep; I had such a weird dream … I think it involved eggcups and purple glitter; yaaar it was confusing." Said Barney as he scratched his hair while trying to remember the rest of the dream.

"Don't bother trying to search within your mind Barney; it's a dark labyrinth and you'll never ever find your way out." Teased Lavender.

"Kind of like yesterday's challenge then savvy?" Said Barney as he put an arm around Lavender which she appreciated.

"You could say that." Said Lavender before she frowned.

"…Did I say something stupid mermaid?" Asked Barney hesitantly.

"It's not you … it's just that I don't have any room mates anymore." Explained Lavender as she looked out at the sea. "First Raven, then Mable, now Xaria. They're all gone. And you know what else?"

"What? You collect crayons?" Guessed Barney in hopes of amusing Lavender.

"I guess you don't know what else." Giggled Lavender before she sighed. "It's just that all of my team mates are now gone … bar one; somebody I wanted gone long ago."

"You mean Kasimar huh?" Said Barney in understanding. "Has he been giving you more trouble?"

"Besides the usual jeering and insults, no. But he's the last person I wanted to have as my one remaining team mate." Explained Lavender.

"It's a battle as old as time; evil and wicked VS good and kind." Said Barney philosophically.

"I'm guessing I'm the good and kind." Smiled Lavender.

"True; and let's not forget sexy as well me heartie." Grinned Barney.

Lavender blushed as red as her hair.

* * *

**Confessional: What is redder; blood or a tomato? What do YOU think? Huh?**

**Lavender: Why does Barney have to be so good at flirting? He makes me blush more than a lobster when the sea weed … ok, I admit that was a really bad joke, but Barney told it to me. **(Lavender giggles).

**Barney: Better to be honest right?**

* * *

"You're cute when you blush yaaar." Flirted Barney.

"Oh shush!" Blushed Lavender though she was smiling. "Barney; you're embarrassing me!"

"That's what makes it fun mermaid." Chuckled Barney as he looked out at the waves. "The sea is calm today; care for a swim yaaaar?"

"I'd rather just lie here and sunbathe." Replied Lavender as she lay down. "It's quite a nice beach; Chris should have had more beach related challenges."

"Good point; you know, I think sandcastle building would have been a pretty good challenge. My friend Ophelia back home is an expert at building them." Said Barney with a chuckle. "She's even wilder than me now that I think about it; yo ho."

"That would have been a nice challenge; something simple that could at the same time be interesting." Said Lavender as she turned over onto her belly and began to doze.

* * *

**Confessional: Sandcastle Hassle!**

**Chris: No way! That challenge would have sucked! There wouldn't have been any vomit or loss of blood and limbs! What fun would it be? Like any of these losers could think of a good challenge; let alone be a good host like me! Haha!**

* * *

"Final nine Barney; we're near the end of the competition and both of us made it." Said Lavender excitedly. "Too bad that Kasimar and Nakia are still here."

"Don't worry me mermaid; remember last season? When only a few campers remain immunity is awarded to only a single person." Explained Barney while rubbing his hands together. "That means that one of the gruesome twosome will be voted off sooner or later."

"Followed immediately afterwards by the other." Finished Lavender. "And then we can rest easy."

* * *

**Confessional: This is no time for sleeping!**

**Lavender: Or as easy as the beds allow us too; I wish they weren't so lumpy and stiff.**

**Chris: Oh shut up! They were the best beds that I could find in the rubbish dump!**

* * *

"So; what do we do until Chris calls us for the challenge?" Asked Barney.

"I have an idea … and a request." Said Lavender as she took out a bottle of sunscreen. "My back burns kind of easy; any chance of you rubbing some of this on my back?"

"Whatever you say Lavender!" Said Barney with a salute as he squirted some of the sunscreen on his hands and began rubbing in on Lavender's back.

* * *

**Confessional: I smell fan service!**

**Lavender: Is it wrong to say I enjoyed that? … Nah; it was great!**

**Barney: Now I can die happy … just joking! Yohohohohohoho!**

* * *

Spider and Quana were sitting next to each other on Quana's bed; Quana had a mischievous gleam in her eyes while Spider looked nervous about something.

"Are you sure this *cough*s is a good idea?" Asked Spider as he took off his shoes. "What if somebody walks in on us?"

"Aw c'mon Spider; where's your sense of adventure?" Asked Quana as she took off her purple socks and her shoes. "It's nothing that big."

"I've still *cough* never done it before." Said Spider as he pulled off his blue and yellow polka dotted socks.

"It's just a game of footsies; every couple and their cat has done this." Giggled Quana before tapping her chin in thought. "Well; maybe not that last part."

"You always know how *cough* to make me laugh." Chuckled Spider as he and Quana sat on opposite sides of the bed. "But you do realize that our families might see this."

"That's why I turned off the camera." Said Quana as she pointed to the camera above the door. "I'm pretty certain it's possible to turn off any camera on the Island; maybe the confessional camera too but I haven't really checked."

"Speaking of checking; it looks like *cough* you were being serious about the *cough* full body tan; even the soles of your *sneeze* feet are tanned." Noted Spider as he glanced at Quana's feet.

"I wouldn't lie to you." Replied Quana with a sweet smile before grinning. "Now; where were we? Oh; I Think I remember! Heehee!"

Quana began to rub her soft feet against Spider's which caused him to blush.

"Whoa; your feet are softer than cotton." Said Spider nervously as he scratched the back of his hair and began to rub back at Quana.

"Enjoying yourself are you?" Asked Quana with a blush as she relaxed her body.

"… Am I allowed to say *gag* yes?" Asked Spider with a giddy grin on his face.

"If you want to; especially because I have the same answer." Replied Quana as she flexed her toes against Spider's own toes. "So; final nine huh? Not bad at all."

"I'm feeling pretty *cough* good about myself for making it *cough* this far." Smiled Spider before gaining a look of thought. "Though Nakia is still gunning for me; and Kasimar … well; he scares me a bit."

"Understandable; there's no shame in being scared of somebody as nasty and vicious as that beast." Replied Quana before she let out a mirthful giggle. "How did you know I was ticklish between my big toe and long toe?"

"I didn't; lucky guess I *cough* suppose." Replied Spider. "Where else are you ticklish?"

"My hips; end of sentence." Replied Quana before looking at Spider suspiciously but playfully. "You're not going to use tickle torture on me are you?"

"Only if you want me *cough* too; I think Barney has done that with *cough* Lavender." Said Spider as he thought back a few days ago.

"It's funny how so many people fall in love on reality TV, isn't it?" Asked Quana.

"We're no *cough* exception." Smiled Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm an exception though … why won't the dressing room answer my calls? WHY? WHYYYYYYYYY?**

**Spider: Quana has really** *cough*** soft feet … what am I saying, I shouldn't ***cough*** talk about that! Though they were** *cough*** really nice … Doh!**

**Quana:** (She is grinning naughtily).** Well; that was enjoyable! Heehee!**

* * *

"So Quana." Began Spider as he and Quana continued their game of footsies. "How would you describe *cough* your time on this insane *cough* island?"

"I'd say it's been both wonderful and brutal. It's wonderful because I've found love and made a lot of great friends … it brutal due to Nakia making slightly racist comments towards me and being a nuisance, and also because of Kasimar hitting on me. But overall, despite all that …I've really had a good time, best summer ever!"

"I'm glad to hear *cough* that." Smiled Spider.

"So Spider; what do you think of your time here?" Asked Quana with a cute smile. "I hope you've had a good time."

"… I sure have." Said Spider simply.

"Wonderful; now, enough talk, more footsies!" Giggled Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: I wish I had feet … frowny face.**

**Spider: Turns out Quana is REALLY ticklish** *cough*** on her hips; her giggles and ***cough* **playful pleas for mercy are really cute indeed … why did I just** *cough*** say that?**

**Quana: That's the **_**last**_** time I ever tell somebody where I'm ticklish … though it was kind of fun regardless! Hahaha!**

* * *

Jimmy walked into the mess hall for breakfast; he had been watching the sky near camp but had started to feel hungry. Then again; he wasn't expecting the food to really be the best breakfast ever.

"I wonder what color it will be today." Thought Jimmy out loud. "Maybe hot pink like the rarest hot wheels cars."

Jimmy entered the mess hall and picked up a tray; the mess hall was mostly empty; Chef was behind the counter and Eleanor was sitting on one of the tables with her ferret cage in front of her seemingly feeding Frost and Dandelion some dried meat.

After Chef gave Jimmy breakfast (soggy cornflakes close to their expiration date) Jimmy walked over to Eleanor's table and sat beside her.

"Good morning Eleanor." Greeted Jimmy politely. "Dandelion looks quite plump; how long until she gives birth?"

"It could be anytime; but the vet said it's most likely to be tomorrow." Said Eleanor with barely contained excitement. "I wonder what I should call the babies."

"How about Murray?" Suggested Jimmy as he looked at the two ferrets in the cage; they looked back with their cute beady eyes.

Eleanor laughed in amusement and Jimmy couldn't help but laugh along with her.

"Somehow I don't think Murray is a very good name for a ferret." Giggled Eleanor. "But I'll keep it in mind just in case."

"Well; maybe Poppy would be better, or perhaps Isabella." Said Jimmy as he ate a spoonful of soggy cornflakes and shuddered as he swallowed.

"I like the name Poppy … I think I'll use that if there is a girl." Said Eleanor as she gave Dandelion a sort of 'ferret treat' biscuit. "Thanks for the help."

"Anytime." Replied Jimmy with a smile. "By the way; I've got something for you if you'd rather skip breakfast."

"Sure; what have you got?" Asked Eleanor eagerly.

"A little bit of candy my friends sent me back on day twelve." Said Jimmy as he took out a half full bag of jelly beans. "Care for some?"

"…Would I ever!" Grinned Eleanor as she took a few beans out of the bag and ate them; she noticed Frost and Dandelion looking at the jelly bean bag and she wagged her finger in an almost parental way. "Sorry you two; jelly beans are bad for cute little ferrets like you, they might cause you indigestion and give you excess weight. You can have this though."

Eleanor took out a bit of dried yet juicy chicken and pressed it through the bars of the cage for Frost and Dandelion to eat.

"It's really sweet seeing you treat Frost and Dandelion like your children." Said Jimmy as he and Eleanor shared the bag of jelly beans.

"Well of course; they're my babies! Well; not literally but I think you know what I mean." Smiled Eleanor as she ate a few more jelly beans. "Thanks for the jelly beans; they're tasty."

"As before; anytime." Said Jimmy with a polite smile before looking at the soggy and moldy cornflakes. "You know … I don't really want to eat these; I'll give breakfast a miss."

"I've already thrown mine in the trash." Said Eleanor as she gestured towards the bin in the corner of the room. "Feel free to throw yours in there as well."

"I think I might." Agreed Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Marmite … but Pa might not!**

**Jimmy: It feels good to share with a friend doesn't it? Well; not everyone would agree but I'm entitled to my opinions.**

**Eleanor: Those jelly beans were nice; that was really generous of Jimmy.**

* * *

Tabitha, Kasimar and Nakia were having an alliance meeting outside camp in the woods; Nakia was brushing her hair as always and Kasimar was smoking a cigarette. Tabitha looked over her alliance mates and mentally sighed.

"_I could have chosen a little better_." Thought Tabitha.

Kasimar tossed his cigarette away and faced Tabitha.

"So; what did you bring us here for?" Asked Kasimar as he crossed his arms. "It had better to worth my while because I don't like time wasters."

"I bought us here because we need to talk about our game plan." Explained Tabitha. "Only nine of us are left now; and our alliance consists of three. If I can convince two others to vote with us then we'll have the majority tonight."

"Why worry? I've won immunity six times in a row and it's going to be seven in a row today." Bragged Kasimar as he admired his hand for a moment.

"Don't get overconfident Kasimar; getting big headed and gaining an excess of overconfidence is a bad thing." Warned Tabitha.

"Whatever; I love bad things, the more unorthodox the better." Shrugged Kasimar indifferently.

"… I see; so Nakia, what do you think? Any thoughts to add?" Asked Tabitha while hoping for an answer that didn't involve hair in the slightest.

"I just want to get rid of Spider, Quana and that brat Eleanor." Snarled Nakia as she clenched her hands into fists. "That blond bitch had the audacity to insult me! She called me a coward!"

Tabitha was about to say that what Eleanor said was kind of true but thought better of it and stayed silent.

"I say we get rid of one of those three next; I don't care which one as long as they suffer." Said Nakia with a nasty glint in her eyes."

"It depends on who wins immunity." Said Tabitha before adding. "And at this point it's in both of your best interests to get immunity."

* * *

**Confessional: It's in my interest to have some ice cream!**

**Tabitha: And I say that because it's pretty obvious one of them would be gone if neither won immunity; I'm certain nobody would vote for anybody else … though I could use my words to save them … but there is no guarantee.**

* * *

"So who do we target now?" Asked Kasimar. "I'm hoping for Barney after what happened yesterday."

"We'll pick off our competition from strongest to weakest." Said Tabitha logically. "So Barney is one of our top targets … but I'd say Lavender should go first because it might be hard to get people to vote for Barney due to how popular and friendly he is."

"I could break his legs." Offered Kasimar.

"That won't be necessary; something tells me even you couldn't fight off a hoard of angry fans and fan girls after the show ends." Said Tabitha hand waving Kasimar's suggestion.

"I don't like Barney at all … but I want Spider or Quana to go!" Whined Nakia as she stomped her feet. "Eleanor can stay a day or two so I can make her suffer."

"…I'll see what I can do." Said Tabitha dully. "In the mean time focus on getting immunity because if you don't then one of you, most likely Kasimar, will be walking the dock of shame, boarding the boat of losers and can never come back ever … hmm, you know, I can see why Chris loves saying that so much."

"Who cares?" Grunted Kasimar. "I don't think winning immunity will be much of a problem; oh, and that reminds me. Once we reach the final three this alliance is dissolved, ok?"

"I understand; may the better contestant win." Said Tabitha with a straight face.

"That'll be me then; I'm not gonna lose to a _girl_." Scoffed Kasimar as he left towards camp. "Maybe I can catch some Z's before today's stupid challenge."

Kasimar walked away and out of sight; Tabitha and Nakia glanced at each other.

"What was I thinking when I thought it would be a good idea to ally with him?" Asked Tabitha to herself.

"Oh _I know_; blue Mohawks are SO six months ago." Agreed Nakia as she brushed her hair some more.

"That wasn't what I meant." Said Tabitha while thinking one word. "_Idiot_."

* * *

**Confessional: Egg salad is SO six seconds ago … because I ate it six seconds ago! LOL!**

**Tabitha: I do not quite understand Nakia's obsession with hair; I mean sure, it's ok to have a bit of pride in your personal appearance … but just a little. Nakia takes it too far; her hair isn't **_**that**_** good anyway. **(Tabitha lets out an annoyed groan). **Well; at least my purple streaks are stylish.**

**Kasimar: Only eight morons left to beat and two are on my side … I like my chances; the million is as good as mine. Chris should just hand me the cheque right away to save time.**

**Nakia: Blue Mohawks are out and funnily enough mushroom haircuts are in … for guys at least. If only there was a challenge about hair knowledge, then I'd excel at it. Yep; I'm just **_**that**_** smart.**

* * *

A short while later after the campers had finished sunbathing / playing footsies / eating candy / strategizing they were in the mess hall. Eleanor had put Frost and Dandelion back in her cabin so they would be safe. The nine campers were sitting around talking or relaxing as it was likely that Chris would announce the next torturous challenge any moment.

"What do you think today's challenge will be Barney?" Asked Lavender to her boyfriend.

"Hmm; I'd say something we haven't seen before yaaar; Chris will want us to think he's original even though he's not savvy?" Said Barney as he thought of the challenges they had done so far. "I'd say this challenge won't be a repeat of something from last season yaaar."

"Yep; Chris isn't very original is he?" Said Lavender in full agreement. "If he had eight sons he'd probably call each of them Frank; so when he says 'Frank, come here', all of them report to him."

"Yohohoho! Good one!" Laughed Barney as he and Lavender high fived.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd name my child Project X; it's the coolest name I've never heard off!**

**Lavender: Then again it's not like Chris even has kids anyway; if he did I'd feel immense sympathy for them.**

**Chris: Shut up you bitch! I'd raise them to be just like me; filthy rich sadists!**

**Chef: **(He looksd a little disturbed). **Pretty boy thinks being a sadist like him is something to be _proud_ of? Man he's mesed up ni the head big time.**

* * *

Eleanor sat next to Jimmy in the same seat she had been before; she was doodling pictures of ferrets in a notebook.

"You're really good at drawing animals Eleanor." Said Jimmy as he observed Eleanor's drawings. "I'm not really the best artist there ever was to put it lightly."

"The quality doesn't really matter; what matters is that you enjoy what you draw." Smiled Eleanor as she pocketed the notebook. "I wonder when Chris will be here; he's taking his time to announce the challenge."

"Is that really a bad thing?" Smirked Jimmy.

"An excellent point." Chuckled Eleanor as she relaxed on her chair. "We should make the best of the free time we have until the next challenge … I hope Chris isn't go to use knockout gas again."

"It's beyond me how it was within his rights to do that." Murmured Jimmy.

As Jimmy and Eleanor conversed Nakia walked behind them and smirked to herself; she kicked the leg of Eleanor's chair which caused the chair to fall over backwards and Eleanor to fall to the floor.

"That's for yesterday." Smirked Nakia foully.

Before Eleanor could make any form of comeback jimmy got out of his seat and glared at Nakia with an expression of ANGER, something he had almost never shown before. He wielded a spoon and poked it at Nakia's chest threateningly.

"Listen up hair for brains! You will **not** do that again, you **will** leave Eleanor alone; you will also **stop** being such a **bully**. If you do not leave her alone then you **will** wake up to find your **every** last bit of your hair shaved off. Understand?" Asked Jimmy firmly as he poked Nakia hardly with the spoon.

Nakia looked afraid at the expression of anger of Jimmy's face; she quickly hurried away to a different table without a word, shivering in fear as she went. Jimmy nodded in satisfaction and helped Eleanor back to her feet.

"You ok Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy nicely.

"I'm alright … bit whoa, Nakia looked like you was going to wet herself!" Said Eleanor sounding highly impressed. "Thanks for standing up for me Jimmy."

"Not a problem; you're my friend and I don't like it when bullies upset my friends." Said Jimmy as he and Eleanor sat back down. "I may be a little immature and silly but I _truly_ care about my friends."

"…Thank you." Smiled Eleanor sweetly as she and Jimmy began talking again; mostly about Eleanor's ferrets.

* * *

**Confessional: Did you know a toy boat is sometimes called a Toy Ship … do you understand the double meaning? Huh?**

**Eleanor: Did you all see that? Nakia looked like she was going to **_**wet herself**_** just because of Jimmy's expression. I wonder if Jimmy could do that to Kasimar as well…**

**Jimmy: I don't know why I got so mad … but seeing Eleanor getting pushed over and Nakia taunted her really, really, really made me angry. Eleanor is like Nakia's opposite really; she's kind, sweet, friendly and she's really pretty. **(Jimmy chuckles to himself before he realizes what he just said). **Wait … did I just say Eleanor was really pretty … why did I do that? **(Jimmy thinks for a moment and his eyes widen a little). **Wait …** **Do I **_**like her**_** like her?**

**Spider: Even Jimmy can stand up ***cough* **to Nakia … good for Jimmy … but I'm such ***cough* **a wimp that I can't even stand up to a carrot ***cough* **stick. Man; I've got to man ***cough* **up.**

**Nakia: How … how … how **_**DARE**_** that little brat talk to me like that! He's now number four on my hit list! In third is Quana, very closely following Eleanor in second and first is that Spider. **(Nakia glares angrily).

* * *

A few minutes after Nakia apparently nearly wet herself in fear Chris walked into the mess hall in the same Elvis Presley outfit he had been wearing earlier.

"Hoorah! It is me; Chris Maclean, you may hold your applause!" Said Chris as he basked in the sound of his own voice while the campers looked at him dully.

"We weren't going to applaud." Said Lavender flatly.

"Why ever not?" Asked Chris with his smirk not leaving his face.

"Because we hate you." Said Quana to point out the painfully obvious fact.

"Oh shut up!" Whined Chris as he stomped his foot. "I hate all of you as well so there! Haha!"

"That was pathetic." Said Eleanor dryly to which Jimmy laughed.

"Stop making fun of me!" Said Chris as he turned red with anger. "It's time for your next challenge and this one is going to really tire you out and at the same time make your brain hurt! Haha!"

"Why are you dressed as Elvis Presley?" Asked Quana before she smiled. "Are we having a singing competition?"

"No! No we are not you stupid little mule!" Laughed Chris while Quana growled. "Today we are going to be paying a tribute and a homage to a genre of video games that are great fun when you have a lot of bored people … I am, of course, talking about Party games!"

"Party game? You mean like Crash Bash, Mario Party and Micro Machines V3?" Asked Jimmy with an excited look. "Awesome! Me and the guys back home always do an all nighter of Mario Party on Saturdays in school holidays."

"Who cares?" Laughed Chris. "But eyes; somehow, despite being a dumb ten year old … you are correct. Today's challenge is inspired by Mario Party … but is totally nothing like it as well. Follow me outside and maybe I'll tell you the rules … maybe."

Chris left themes hall and the campers followed him; some willingly and some very reluctulently.

* * *

**Confessional: Party games? Are they anything like blowing out the candles on a birthday cake or playing musical chairs?**

**Jimmy: I have high hopes for this challenge; party games are great fun! Pablo has quite a collection of them; micro machines V3 is always fun … though Ricky always wins! I guess it comes from having a lot of knowledge about cars being that his dad is the owner of an auto shop.**

**Spider: This is odd; I was ***cough* **talking about Mario Party with Xaria ***sneeze* **yesterday … and now there is a challenge** *cough* **about it … this is a sign of some ***cough* **sort … or just a big coincidence.**

**Kasimar: Party games are too childish for me; still, when I was in elementary school it was always fun to type in cheat codes and make the others cry when they lost. Good times…**

* * *

Chris stood before the campers in front of the dock of shame; there was what appeared to be an anti shark net in the water which concealed a space of the water from the rest. Chris flashed his pearly whites for the camera and began to speak.

"Ok everyone; today's challenge is called Wawanakwa Party Big Bash! This challenge has more rules than the others due to there being a number of mini games to play. But the general idea is simple. We are going to be playing eight mini games; the worst performer in each game is eliminated. This means we will eventually have one winner who will receive solo immunity."

"Wait; so only a single person can win immunity?" Said Tabitha to be sure she'd heard right.

"Correctamundo Tabitha." Smirked Chris. "From now on and for the rest of the competition only a single person will win immunity every challenge … so try your hardest to win! It's all or nothing from now on! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: All or nothing … if the prize is money then I want it all!**

**Tabitha: …This could present a problem; if Kasimar wins immunity then Nakia goes, if Nakia wins immunity then Kasimar goes … what am I going to do?**

* * *

"So anyway; it's time for your first mini game." Said Chris as he gestured to the water. "To subtract one from nine to get eight remaining campers you're all going to be holding your breath!"

"Holding our breath?" Repeated Nakia.

"Yep; you'll be jumping off the dock on the count of three and you'll be submerging underwater; the first person to surface will be eliminated." Explained Chris.

"What? But that'll mess up my hair!" Whined Nakia. "Sea water ruins the style!"

"Too bad too sad." Taunted Chris. "Now everybody line up and prepare to jump off on my mark … and don't try to cheat by going under the dock or breathing through your nose above water because it won't work.

The nine campers lined up and prepared to jump in; Lavender then had a thought.

"Couldn't you at least let us change into our swimming outfits?" Asked Lavender.

"No can do ditzy! The more you suffer the more I get amused and the higher the ratings go as well." Denied Chris. "Anyway; on the count of three you must jump in … you might want to start taking a deep breath."

The campers began breathing in and out deeply as Chris began the countdown.

"One"

"Two"

"Two and a half"

"Two and three thirds"

"Two and ninety five hundredths"

"… Three!" Yelled Chris.

The nine campers jumped down into the water and submerged themselves underwater.

"Hmm … this isn't as exciting as I thought it would be." Said Chris in a bored tone. "I knew I should have got rid of the shark net and put dead fish in the water to attract the sharks to the campers."

About four seconds passed and suddenly bubbles rose from underwater. A second Later Nakia surfaced screaming as she had an octopus attached to her face.

"Get it off me! Get it off me!" Wailed Nakia as she swam to the beach and ran around in circles screaming.

"Man; that's brutal AND hilarious! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

Nakia managed to find the boathouse and began smacking her face against the wall repeatedly to make the octopus let go. After eight face whacks it retreated but Nakia accidently smacked her face into the wall again and knocked herself unconscious.

"…Forget sharks! Octopuses are even better! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as one by one the other campers began to surface and breath in air.

"I heard screaming; what happened?" Asked Tabitha.

"Nakia got attacked by an octopus and knocked herself unconscious." Explained Chris. "That means that you eight are through to the next minicamp and Nakia is eliminated from the challenge and is definitely votable tonight."

A number of the campers grinned and cheered that Nakia was finally votable; Kasimar crossed his arms and rolled his eyes at Nakia's pitiful performance while Nakia clapped to make it look like she was happy when in reality she was frustrated.

"Anyway; you eight can go and dry off … and I suppose I should get Chef to take Nakia to the medical tent." Said Chris reluctulently.

"Hey Chris; I remember this mini game from Mario party Four." Said jimmy. "You didn't steal it did you?"

"… Shut up!" Said Chris nervously.

* * *

**Confessional: Take a deep breathe!**

**Nakia:** (She has a bandage around her head).** That was, like, so dreadful! What did I do to deserve that? Was it because I like sushi … it's the only Chinese food I like. Stupid octopus! And now I'm not immune … well; I'm sure Tabitha will think of something … just you wait!**

**Quana: **(She is laughing). **One of the camera men showed me a recording of what happened to Nakia … I want to remember that forever! Hahahahaha**! (Quana falls over and continues laughing).

**Kasimar: I was the last person to surface; at this rate I'll win with no problems. Shame about Nakia but somebody's got to come last.**

**Eleanor: Ah Karma; it's a truly wonderful thing.**

* * *

Chris stood in front of the camera while in the background some interns put Nakia on a stretcher and carried her away to the medical tent to treat her octopus calamity injuries.

"So Nakia is out of the running for immunity and that means if Kasimar wins she will be voted off without much doubt. But who will win immunity? Who will excel at the mini games and who will perform as poorly as Homer Simpson at the Olympics? Will any couples get to second base on camera? Here's hoping! And who will be the next person voted off the island and will it be who you expect? … Probably! But even so; stay tuned to find out the answers to these questions, and more, when we return to day twenty one Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

So the mini games have begun and Nakia is already eliminated from the challenge; things are only going to get more surprising from here!

The breath holding mini game is in fact one of the four player mini games from Mario Party 4; a game titled 'Take a breather'.

In the next chapter the mini games continue and somebody is voted off in THE most shocking Bonfire Ceremony yet! It could be bad shocking … but it may also be good shocking, I'm not telling! You'll have to wait for the next chapter to find out.


	46. Day 21, Part 2, Mini Game Madness

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme, that belongs to Frank15 and his super awesome story Total Drama Alphabet

**The Warning: **This chapter contains tooshy squeezing, free falling, mini games, a nasty bully, a sadistic host and something shocking. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **I have been reading books for years; and if I have learned one thing from them it is this. Sometimes … bad things happen. Sometimes a bad thing must be thrown in the way of our heroes to make the story work; like when Sirius died, or Dobby or even Mad Eye Moody. It is very regrettable … but sometimes in certain stories this must happen. With this knowledge in mind I hope you enjoy chapter forty six of Total Drama Letterz.

And by the way ... I have officially topped FIVE HUNDRED THIOUSAND WORDS! I think I'm the first person in the total drama fandom to do so! Woohoo! That means that for a time Total Drama Letterz is THE longest story in the fandom!

Time to heat up the already well hearted oven!

* * *

"And we're back." Said Chris to the camera as he struck a pose that he (and only he) thought was manly and studly. "The stupid campers have got dried off from the breath holding challenge we are ready to continue our extremely awesome mini game mayhem of a challenge; much more awesome than the contestants!"

"We can here you ya know." Frowned Jimmy as he crossed his arms and looked offended.

"That's the general idea; to upset you." Sneered Chris quite rudely. "Anyway; as you all know, Nakia has been eliminated from the challenge and we are now on the second mini game of the overall total of eight."

"Why are you telling us this? You just said that we already know." Said Tabitha while arching an eyebrow.

"I have my reasons." Said Chris simply.

* * *

**Confessional: Just like I have a reason that I'm made of wood … it's because I'm an outhouse!**

**Tabitha: I'd say his reasons are because he loves the sounds of his own voice.**

**Chris: Possibly; but also … ok; that was the reason. But who the #bleep# hell cares?**

**Kasimar: Chris's voice feels like a hacksaw on my brain, it's that unpleasant.**

* * *

"So what's the next *cough* mini game?" Asked Spider while silently dreading what the answer might be.

"I'm glad you asked me Spider; we're going to be playing what I like to call, 'Snip or die'!" Cackled Chris almost scarily.

"I don't like where this is going." Gulped Eleanor.

"Don't worry; this one is easy … and it's all about luck as well." Shrugged Chris as he pointed towards the thousand foot cliff. "We'll need to take a helicopter ride to the cliff face … and I don't want anybody joining the mile high club, even if it would be nice to watch! Haha!"

Chris was met with a number of sticks and stones to the face courtesy of a number of angry campers.

* * *

**Confessional: Sticks and stones will break Chris's bones … and words will make him cry like a big baby.**

**Lavender: Is Chris a pervert or something?**

**Quana: That was quite an inappropriate comment … I wonder if Jimmy knows what the 'mile high club' even is? Oh dear…**

**Jimmy: So … is the 'mile high club' some sort of social elite group that holds meetings in helicopters or something?**

* * *

The campers were nervously standing on a platform that had been set up on the face of the cliff about nine hundred feet above the ground; needless to say it but none of the campers wanted to look down. At one end of the platform was a circle on the ground; in front of it was a monitor with eighteen buttons in a line; each had a picture of Chris's face on it and it seemed like the goal was to press them.

"Ok everyone; I'm guessing you are a little curious as to why we are up here so high above the ground." Said Chris with a chuckle.

"The thought might have crossed my mind yaaar." Said Barney as he whistled a tune.

"Well; we are up here for our next mini game; a sudden death luck based game that I thought up all by myself as well!" Bragged Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: I doubt that last bit.**

**Chef: More like he completely ripped it off from Mario Party 8 and made some very minor changes.**

* * *

"The rules for this one are very simple." Said Chris idly. "Just stand on the circle and press a button; you have a one in seventeen chance of being safe."

"What about the other one if eighteen chance?" Asked Lavender skeptically.

"You get shot into the air and fall a couple hundred feet into the water." Said Chris clearly not caring.

"…What?" Gaped Barney. "That's gotta be illegal yaaar!"

"Not in Muskoka!" Laughed Chris. "Anyway Barney; it's your unlucky day because we're going in alphabetical order … and as Andy is gone that means you'll be first! Haha!"

Barney blinked and gulped as he slowly made his way to the circle on the ground and looked over the buttons. Each of them had a number above them; from one to eighteen. Barney threw caution to the wind and pressed button number thirteen.

Nothing happened.

"And Barney is safe for now." Said Chris in disappointment as Barney rejoined the others. "Looks like Eleanor is next up; this oughta be good! Haha!"

Eleanor nervously walked up and looked over the buttons as she stood in the circle. Even though there was only a very small chance of her getting flung into the air and falling to the water Eleanor was shaking like a leaf in the wind.

"You'll notice that the button Barney pressed it firmly stuck in; that's to prevent you picking the same button."! Explained Chris. "You now have a one in seventeen chance of getting sent into orbit! Haha!"

Eleanor gulped as her knees began to knock.

"Press button one Eleanor!" Called Jimmy. "Chris thinks he's number one so he would have made his favorite number safe."

Eleanor knew she could trust Jimmy; praying that he was right she pressed the button with a number one above it.

Nothing happened.

Eleanor let out a sigh of relief as she shakily rejoined the others. Jimmy stood beside her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Are you ok?" Asked Jimmy in concern for his best friend.

Eleanor looked at Jimmy; she smiled and she gave him a hug of gratefulness.

"Thank you Jimmy; a fall from this high … that would be so scary." Murmured Eleanor as she withdrew from the hug.

"Right on; I hope I don't choose the button that'll send me flying." Agreed Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Push the red button! The red button!**

**Eleanor: The way jimmy keeps protecting me makes me wonder if he's my guardian angel. That's a really nice thought.**

* * *

"You're next Jimmy." Said Chris with an evil smirk on his nasty face. "Since you're the lightest you'll get sent up higher and you'll have further to fall … just a little warning."

Jimmy stepped up onto the circle and looked over the buttons. He covered his eyes with his left hand and randomly chose a button with his right; he had pressed button number nine.

Nothing happened.

"This isn't so bad." Said Jimmy as he rejoined the other eight campers.

"It'll get much worse though!" Cackled Chris like a stereotypical evil mad scientist. "For every safe button pressed it becomes more likely that the button you press will be the dangerous one!"

"Kasimar is up next; so let's hope he gets sent into the stratosphere!" Smirked Lavender as the others nodded in agreement; though Tabitha only nodded so she wouldn't look suspicious.

"That's right; Kasimar, it's your turn." Said Chris as he gestured to the circle on the ground.

Kasimar gulped in fear as he hesitantly walked over to the circle and stepped on it. He looked over the buttons with terror surging through his system.

"Oh look! The big bad bully is scared!" Jeered Lavender. "Do you want a wowwypop?"

Kasimar growled and pressed button number seven.

Nothing happened much to the disappointment of most of the others.

Kasimar smirked as he rejoined the crowd and chuckled.

"Disappointed?" Asked Kasimar dryly.

"She should be because Lavender is next." Smirked Chris. "She could be the first cheerleader to fly! Haha!"

Lavender glowered are Chris and Kasimar as she bravely stepped onto the circle; after a moment of consideration pressed button number eighteen confidently.

Nothing happened.

"Aw come on!" Growled Kasimar in disappointment. "I wanted to see the red rat scream!"

"So sorry to disappoint." Said Lavender with a mocking look.

"You're mocking me aren't you?" Snarled Kasimar.

"…Possibly." Smirked Lavender.

"Right on Mermaid!" Grinned Barney as he hi fived Lavender.

"Nakia would have been next." Said Chris before he frowned in disappointment. "But because she's already eliminated we'll move onto the next person alphabetically. Quana; time to sing a song about freefalling!"

"I'd prefer to sing a song about why you suck." Retorted Quana as she stood on the circle and looked over the buttons she could choose to press. "Hmm; which one to press."

"I can't *cough* look!" Gulped Spider as he covered his eyes with his hands.

After a moment of thought Quana pressed button number six and crossed her fingers.

Nothing happened.

Quana smiled in relief as she rejoined the others; she gently hugged Spider as he looked quite faint.

"Don't worry Spider; I'm ok." Assured Quana.

"But will Spider be ok?" Asked Chris with a sadistic smirk. "Or will he be spreading his germs in orbit? Let's find out! Haha!"

Spider gulped and slowly walked over to the button control panel and stood on the circle. Spider looked over the buttons he could choose from; each of them had an equal chance of sending him into orbit. After thinking for a few seconds Spider made his decision and pressed button number four.

BOING!

The circle platform sprung upwards violently on a spring and send Spider flying up into the air screaming; a few seconds later he began to fall down to the water below.

"Yahahahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in great sadistic amusement at Spider's misfortune. "That's gonna leave a mark!"

"Spider!" Screamed Quana in horror as she ran to the edge of the platform and looked down at her boyfriend falling into the water below with a big splash.

"Eh; I'm sure he'll be fine." Said Chris sadistically; it was clear that he didn't care at all.

"Tell you what." Said Kasimar as he walked up to Quana. "How about I help lighten the blow."

Before Quana could react Kasimar swung his hand at her butt; but rather than smacking her rump he squeezed her right butt cheek hard.

"Aaah! You pervert!" Screamed Quana in pure rage.

In one quick motion Quana whirled around and punched Kasimar on the nose thus breaking it. Kasimar staggered back to the edge of the platform and began to wobble.

"No, no, no, no, NO, NO!" Wailed Kasimar as he fell off the side and into the water below with a hard splash. A girly scream followed this.

"Hmm; looks like he landed on his nuts." Noted Quana.

Everyone, even Tabitha, began to laugh at Kasimar's misfortune. After a whole two minutes of laughing Chris spoke up.

"Well; looks like Spider is out." Chuckled Chris before glancing over the edge. "Just so you all know; even though Kasimar fell to the water below he is still competing in the challenge."

"What a wonderful moment until you spoiled it with that announcement." Muttered Lavender. "And I don't really see how this challenge was very fair."

"How so?" Asked Chris as he admired his hand idly.

"Because Tabitha didn't even have to do anything and it's all about luck! That's not fair at all!" Exclaimed Lavender.

"I agree; it kind of is unfair." Admitted Tabitha.

"Tell it to someone who cares." Shrugged Chris. "Anyway! Let's get back in the helicopter; it's time for the next super fun and quirkily awesome mini game!"

* * *

**Confessional: That was about as unfair as Napalm's elimination from Robot Wars the Second Wars, look it up.**

**Tabitha: I was being honest when I said it wasn't fair … but that doesn't mean I'm not thankful. Getting sprung into the air and free falling over a thousand feet isn't really my cup of tea to be honest. And Kasimar should make like an artist and keep his pencil in his pocket! Its obvious Quana hates him … and I think he knows as well.**

**Kasimar: That slutty singer! How dare she do that! Man my balls feel like raw meat getting hit by a tenderizer! Still; it was worth having a feel of her ass! Yahahaha!**

**Spider: …I have a sudden** *cough*** dislike of Mario Party.**

**Quana: I ought to call the police on Kasimar; the way he keeps sexually harassing me … it's making me seriously freaked out and uncomfortable. **(Quana takes a deep breath and then breaths out). **I hope Spider is ok. **

**Barney: Yohohohohoho! Kasimar fell on his cabin boys!**

* * *

One helicopter ride later the seven campers still in the challenge found themselves back at camp looking at a Dance Dance Revolution machine. Spider, who had now dried off, was sitting on a bench set up off to the side. Nakia also sat on a bench, one a distance away from Spider.

"Ok everyone; can any of you losers tell me what this is?" Asked Chris as he gestured to the pink dancing machine behind him.

"We're not losers." Frowned Eleanor. "And it's a Dance Dance Revolution machine."

"Right you are Eleanor ... somehow. Anyway; for this mini game the rules are going to be very simple. All you have to do is dance along to a certain song we, by which I mean myself, have picked out. You simply have to score a high amount of points. The person with the lowest amount of points is eliminated, pretty easy right?"

"Hmm; I don't know." Said Jimmy as he scratched his long hair in thought. "Knowing that you're a sadist there is bound to be a twist to this mini game … right?"

"As always." Smirked Chris. "To keep you on your toes and give you incentive not to lose … if you mess up too much then you'll get electrocuted. Haha!"

"… You're a dick." Frowned Kasimar.

"Right back at'cha!" Chuckled Chris. "Anyway; we're going in alphabetical order once again because that way is more fun."

"I fail to see how." Said Lavender flatly.

"And that means we'll be starting with Barney." Said Chris while completely ignoring Lavender's statement.

"Bring it on yaaar!" Said Barney in determination.

"Are you gonna be ok Barney?" Asked Lavender in concern.

"Don't worry me mermaid; I've played this game before." Assured Barney as he stepped on the DDR machine. "So; which song am I dancing along to yaaar?"

"You, along with everyone else, will be dancing along to the theme song of a very great game." Said Chris with a fake smile.

"Super Mario Bros?" Guessed Jimmy.

"Nope!" Smirked Chris. "The game I'm talking about … is called DeathSpank!"

"…DeathSpank? Seriously?" Asked Kasimar with a look of incredulousness. "Were the creators high when they thought that name up? That's even worse than 'Nut's and milk'!"

"I didn't name the game." Shrugged Chris.

"Wait; if all of us are dancing to the song won't we all have the same dance to do? Those later in the alphabet will have an advantage." Pointed out Eleanor.

"Fine by me." Smirked Kasimar.

"To answer your annoying whiny question." Began Chris. "The dance moves for the song are randomized so nobody is going to have an advantage. Now Barney; you show us what you've got!"

The song came on and Barney began to dance. True to his word he had played the game before; he was able to keep up with the song as the speed increased. Barney didn't miss a single dance step until near the end of the song where he misplaced his foot and didn't hit the left arrow when he was meant to.

ZAP!

Barney was electrocuted and stumbled a little bit; when he recovered the song had ended. Barney jumped off the dance machine and turned to Chris.

"So … how did I do?" Asked Barney while straightening his hat.

"Not bad; I think you'll be safe for the next round." Said Chris without much interest. "You scored ninety thousand and four out of a one hundred thousand maximum."

"Yeehaw! Yo ho!" Cheered Barney as he rejoined the crowd while Eleanor stepped up.

"Let's get started I suppose." Said Eleanor as she stepped onto the dance machine. "How many volts will I be zapped with if I mess up?"

"Nothing much; just two thousand." Smirked Chris.

Eleanor blinked and gulped as the song began to play. Eleanor didn't have much difficulty keeping up with the song as she danced along to it. Kasimar however chose this moment to interfere.

"Boo! Go back to dancing school!" Jeered Kasimar as he threw a small rock at Eleanor full force.

The rock hit the back of Eleanor's head and made her stumble and miss a fair few of the steps. As a result…

ZAP!

Eleanor was electrocuted with quite some force and fell off the dancing machine stage with stars circling her head. The song immediately ended.

"Looks like Eleanor performed pretty poorly with a score of twenty six thousand two hundred and seven." Noted Chris. "Just over a quarter of the maximum score available."

"That was so unfair!" Complained Jimmy. "Kasimar cheated!"

"I never said those observing the dancer couldn't interfere with them." Smirked Chris nastily. "Anyway; this means that Barney is guaranteed to be in the next mini game."

Everyone scowled at Kasimar.

* * *

**Confessional: You cheater!**

**Kasimar: It's no big deal; the girl wasn't going to win the challenge, and besides, I've wanted to hear her scream in pain for a while now. This isn't a tea party; it's Total Drama!**

**Eleanor: …Ow. **

**Barney: I may be safe … but Eleanor didn't really get a chance; and Chris wouldn't let her continue because she fell off the dance stage. Yaaar! This be an injustice me hearties!**

**Nakia: Ha! That was priceless, watching the mouthy blond bratty rat getting fried. Too bad the voltage wasn't lethal … but it'll do I suppose.**

**Spider: I hope Eleanor ***cough* **is all right. That was just wrong of ***cough* **Kasimar; just like everything he ***sneeze* **does.**

* * *

"Next up is Jimmy." Chuckled Chris. "I always did like the smell of burning beanie hats in the afternoon. Haha!"

Jimmy glared at Chris and bravely stepped onto the dance machine. He began to dance along to the DeathSpank theme tune without too much difficulty. Jimmy missed a few of the steps and got electrocuted a few times; but he didn't give up and managed to get to the end of the song with a total of five electric shocks.

"What's my score Chris?" Asked Jimmy as he stepped off the DDR machine.

"Well; you beat Eleanor." Said Chris. "You scored seventy eight thousand five hundred points. You'll be in the next mini game for sure."

Jimmy rejoined the others and stood beside Eleanor while Kasimar confidently strode out and onto the DDR machine.

"This song should be a piece of cake." Scoffed Kasimar.

"I could see this song being your theme song." Said Spider from his seat on the bench off to the side. A glare from Kasimar made him immediately go silent.

"Remember Kasimar." Said Quana with a grin and a glare. "Interference is completely allowed … have fun!"

Kasimar gulped as he knew what Quana meant; the others were going to throw things at him.

"Ready, steady … and … dance!" Announced Chris as the song began once again.

Kasimar began to dance along to the song reluctulently but made it look like a breeze. That is, until the other campers besides Nakia and Spider began to pelt him with rocks, crushed soda cans and even handfuls of dirt. Kasimar managed to keep on his feet for a while but a well placed rock to the back off his head caused Kasimar to misplace his footing and screw up five dancing steps in a row.

ZAPPITY ZAP!

Kasimar was electrocuted very, _very_ painfully and fell onto the grass in a daze; the song ended and Chris shook his head in disappointment.

"Not a very good performance Kasimar." Chastised Chris. "Quite a low score."

Chris then smirked.

"But it was still enough to beat Eleanor." Chuckled Chris. "You scored exactly twenty nine thousand points."

"Ha! In your faces!" Sneered Kasimar to the others. "You're not getting rid of me that easily!"

* * *

**Confessional: He's even harder to squish than a flippin cockroach, and that's really saying something!**

**Lavender: Well; it was worth a try I suppose. And at least that monster got electrocuted.**

**Tabitha: It seems there is a lot of cheating going on today. I don't mind that; nobody will cheat against me. And since I'm last alphabetically I seem to have a slight advantage. **(Tabitha looks up). **Much appreciated.**

* * *

"Ok Lavender; you're next." Said Chris before adding. "And try not to scream to quietly; ok?"

"Get bent!" Shot Lavender as she got onto the miniature dancing stage and the song began.

Lavender seemed to have played DDR before as she was very familiar with what do and easily kept up with the speed of the song and very quickly was racking up points. Lavender made a wrong move near the end of the song though.

ZAP!

Lavender lost her footing for a brief fraction of a second but stayed on her feet continued dancing along to the song. Half a minute later the song came to an end and Lavender stepped off the DDR machine.

"Not bad Lavender." Said Chris though it seemed to pain him to say that. "You scored a grand total of ninety four thousand eight hundred and sixty three points."

"Excellent." Said Lavender as she stood next to Barney who looked impressed with his girlfriends dancing skill.

"Next up to take on the dancing machine is Quana." Said Chris before chuckling sadistically. "Let's see if she can dance as good as she can sing."

"I think I can do this." Said Quana as she walked towards the machine. "I've played the game before."

"Not with electrocution you haven't!" Sneered Nakia.

"Be careful *cough* Quana." Said Spider from the sidelines.

"Don't worry cutie; I will be." Assured Quana soothingly as she stepped onto the dance machine as Chris started the song up again.

Quana was right; she _could_ do this. Without a single problem she managed to keep up with the song and also didn't make a single error. She scored a perfect on every step that she took. Everyone watched the Hispanic singer dance with ease and looked impressed.

"Whoa; she's really good." Noted Tabitha sounding impress, which truthfully she was.

"That's my *cough* girl!" Cheered Spider.

The song came to and end and Quana did a twirl as she stepped off the small DDR stage without a single sign of electrocution and smirked at Chris.

"So; how did I do? I hope I did ok." Said Quana with an amused look at the expression on Chris's face.

"But … but … how … ARRGH! You were supposed to get electrocuted!" Whined Chris childishly. "Well; seeing as you scored a perfect on every step and didn't get electrocuted once … it's pretty obvious you have scored a perfect grand total of one hundred thousand."

"Awesome!" Cheered Quana as she walked back to the crowd while Tabitha made her way forwards.

"I assume that I'm next." Said Tabitha as she glanced at the DDR machine that seemed to almost be mocking her with it's DDRyness.

"Yep; your performance decides if Eleanor stays in the challenge or is out." Said Chris. "Amuse me because I hope to see some electrocution! Haha!"

"We'll see." Said Tabitha calmly as she stepped onto the DDR machine as the DeathSpank title theme song began to play one last time.

Tabitha began to dance along to it but didn't have as much experience with the game as Lavender and Quana did. Tabitha managed to score decently, for her experience level, but soon enough…

ZAP!

Tabitha got electrocuted and yelped in pain as she continued dancing despite the pain. Just as the song was drawing to a close Tabitha made a mistake on the final dance step.

ZAP!

Tabitha yelped again as she quickly stepped off the DDR machine and awaited Chris's announcement of her score.

"Good job Tabitha; you did enough to … stay in the game!" Announced Chris. "And you got electrocuted as well! Awesome! Haha!"

"So how many points did I score, out of curiosity?" Asked Tabitha.

"You scored sixty thousand four hundred and ninety seven." Said Chris before facing the small crowd of campers. "And with that this mini game is over. Eleanor … you're out! You can watch the rest of the mini games but you can no longer win immunity. Anyway; everyone follow me because it's time for mini game number four."

Chris led the campers towards a different part of camp while a few of the campers frowned to themselves.

* * *

**Confessional: Time for a party game; pin the tail on the donkey!**

**Jimmy: The way Eleanor lost wasn't fair at all. I seriously hope Kasimar doesn't win this challenge like he has been doing as lot lately, he deserves to leave!**

**Nakia: Karma does exist after all; that brat insulted me and now she has paid the price. Hmmhmm! Wonderful!**

**Barney: I wonder what is faster … a snail or a slug? … I'd put my money on the snail.**

* * *

Six flagpoles stood before the campers. Each of them was a different color, they were pale blue, yellow, orange, pale red, pale purple and dark maroon; standing in front of each respective flagpole was Barney, Jimmy, Kasimar, Lavender, Quana and Tabitha. Sitting off to the side were Eleanor, Nakia and Spider though Nakia was sitting away from the other two.

"Ok everyone." Said Chris with a fake smile plastered on his face. "This challenge should be a very easy one. All you've got to do is get your flag up to the top of the flagpole by turning the crank. The last person to manage that is eliminated from the challenge. Any questions?"

"Do we turn the flag clockwise or anti clockwise yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"You figure it out … but if may cost you time so guess wisely." Smirked Chris as he took out an air horn. "Ok everyone; get ready to go."

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Go"

Chris sounded the air horn and the campers began to turn the cranks.

It was immediately clear that the campers were supposed to turn the cranks clockwise; unluckily for Tabitha she had turned anti clockwise but quickly realized her mistake and began turning her crank the proper way.

Kasimar was the strongest physically so had the least difficulty with the tiring crank turning and managed to get his flag up to the top first by a considerable time margin.

"Too easy." Bragged Kasimar before wincing. "How! My nose hurts."

"Serves you right." Said Quana coldly as she managed to get her flagpole to the top closely followed two seconds later by Barney.

"Pretty easy mini game me hearties." Said Barney as he relaxed against his flagpole. "I think Chris is losing his touch."

"I'm not losing my touch!" Whined Chris as he stomped his feet in anger. "Every woman loves my touch!"

"That's … not exactly what I meant yaaar." Said Barney with a slightly disturbed facial expression.

* * *

**Confessional: That was a little unnerving.**

**Barney: … Creepy.**

* * *

"Done it!" Said Lavender as she flopped her right arm a little bit to get the blood properly circulating again.

Only Jimmy and Tabitha were left turning their cranks; both were going as fast as they could though it was quite hard to do this because their arms felt very much like jelly.

"C'mon Jimmy!" Cheered Eleanor to encourage her friend.

That was all the support Jimmy needed; with a final burst of energy he got his flag up to the top of the flagpole and flopped his arm like Lavender did.

"It looks like Tabitha is out." Said Chris as he took out a remote with six red buttons on it; he pressed one of the buttons and grinned.

ZAP!

Electricity surged throughout Tabitha's flagpole and in turn in electrocuted Tabitha as well. Tabitha was sent backwards and lay on the ground slightly blackened and coughed out some electricity induced smoke.

"Ow … can I have some ointment?" Asked Tabitha as she slowly got to her feet.

"Sorry; fresh out!" Laughed Chris nastily at Tabitha's misfortune.

Tabitha grumbled and tried to straighten out her hair which was sticking out in funny angles that it normally didn't.

"Anyway; Tabitha is out and thus five of you are still in the game. Time to eliminate another one of you with another mini game!" Grinned Chris sadistically. "Let's go and make you all suffer! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: You're voice is enough to make ANYONE suffer!**

**Spider: I hope the next challenge** *cough*** isn't too bad … I don't want Quana getting ***cough* **hurt. Speaking of which … I would have ***sneeze* **probably lost the flag raising mini game hands ***hard cough* **down.**

**Jimmy: I nearly lose that one; I've got to get my head in the game … and Eleanor's encouragement might help me do just that!**

**Quana: Ouch; I could almost **_**feel**_** what happened to Tabitha. Is Chris insane?**

**Chris: Nope; I'm just sadistic! Haha!**

* * *

Barney, Jimmy, Kasimar, Lavender and Quana were in an arena; scattered everywhere in the arena were party balloons of five colors, red, yellow, blue, green and purple. Each of the five remaining campers was holding a small wooden pole with a few short spikes at the end. It was quite self explanatory what they were supposed to do. Above them at the sides of the arena Nakia, Tabitha, Eleanor and Spider were watching the campers still in the challenge while sitting in chairs that were slightly uncomfortable. Chris was sitting in a comfortable armchair and looked down no the five.

"Ok you five; this is another easy challenge; all you have to do is pop the balloons." Said Chris as he sipped a nice hot latté. "The last person to pop all of their balloons is eliminated and loses any chance of them winning immunity."

Ok; but who is going after which color of balloons?" Asked Quana as she and the other four still competing looked at the sea of party balloons.

"…Isn't it obvious?" Said Chris impatiently.

"We never know with you." Said Lavender dryly.

"Ok, fine, I'll tell you! Yeesh!" Said Chris irritably. "Lavender goes after the red balloons because she wears a lot of red and had red hair. Jimmy goes after the green balloons because he wears green. Barney goes after the yellow balloons because he is very blond. Kasimar goes after the blue balloons because of his blue Mohawk. And Quana is going after the purple balloons because she has a purple shirt; got it?"

"…Sounds simply enough." Shrugged Kasimar before suddenly grinning evilly and nastily. "Oh; and are we allowed to hit each other with the spikes on these sticks?"

"Sadly no; your contracts don't covers broken eyes." Said Chris in regret. "Shame really."

"…You both sicken me." Scowled Quana.

"Whatever toots." Said Chris with an uninterested hand wave. "Anyway…."

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Go"

* * *

**Confessional: Pop goes the weasel!**

**Spider: **(He is holding his ears and flinching). **Too much popping!**

**Eleanor: I guess I know what it's like when the weasel goes pop. **(Eleanor gigglers at her joke).

**Tabitha: This is exactly why I never asked for balloons whenever I had a birthday party … I didn't have parties much but quite frankly they are unnecessary.**

* * *

POP! POP! POP! POP! POP!

The sounds of popping and bursting filled the air; everyone watching the mini game had to cover their ears in discomfort and pain while those actually participated had to grin and bear it … though they were _not _grinning at all.

Kasimar didn't seem to be bothered by the popping sounds and was jabbing his pointy balloon popping stick at the party balloons. He was enjoying the unhappy looks on everyone faces. He saw that he had fewer balloons than most of the others so he felt that he would be safe. He then noticed Quana popping quite a goodly amount of purple balloons, she seemed to be catching up to him.

"There has to be a way around the no hitting clause." Muttered Kasimar; he felt annoyed he couldn't use the spikes. That's when an idea hit him like lightning on a flagpole. "Of course! Yahaha!"

Kasimar popped a few balloons near Quana so as not to make her suspicious. When she looked away Kasimar swung the blunt non spiky end at Quana's head and knocked her to the ground unconscious.

"Eureka!" Cackled Kasimar as he grabbed Quana's spiked stick and began popping balloons with double the efficiency.

The others hadn't seen what Kasimar did at first and continued popping balloons. Spider on the other hand had seen exactly what Kasimar had done.

"Chris! Kasimar hit Quana *cough* with his stick." Said Spider angrily. "He did exactly what you *cough* said he couldn't do!"

"Did he?" Asked Chris without much interest at all. "Well; we'll wait until after the mini game and then I might do something."

Spider glared at Chris but sat down as he knew arguing with Chris would lead him nowhere. Spider looked down at his girlfriend with great concern.

Lavender popped a lot of red balloons rapidly; this wasn't such a difficult challenge … though the noise was quite awful, it was like a dentist drill set to maximum high pitchness! Lavender tried to ignore it as she quickly tried to pop the last of her red party balloons.

"And Kasimar has popped every single blue balloon." Announced Chris happily from above.

Lavender groaned in annoyance as she saw that the blue balloons were all gone. She focused her anger on her red balloons until she had popped the last one.

"Lavender has popped all of her balloons."

At that moment Lavender noticed Quana unconscious on the ground and immediately ran over.

"Chris! Quana is hurt!" Called up Lavender to the sadistic narcissistic host.

"I know! But we've got a challenge to do!" Replied Chris. "I'll sort her out after this mini game."

Lavender was about to respond but Chris continued speaking.

"Oh; and Barney has popped all of his balloons." Added Chris without a care in the world.

Jimmy had also heard Lavender and Chris's conversation about Quana; Jimmy wanted to help, but he knew Chris wouldn't help until the mini game ended. Because of that jimmy continued to pop all the green balloons that remained in the bright arena. Eventually Jimmy popped the last one and Chris immediately sounded an air horn.

"And this mini game is over!" Said Chris. "Everyone come back outside and I'll announce the results."

At that moment Quana let out a groan and sat up.

"What happened?" Asked Quana.

"I'm not sure." Murmured Lavender. "You lost consciousness … but I bet that Kasimar surely has something to do with this!"

Quana growled in anger as she got to her feet.

"In oughta strangle that monster." Said Quana angrily.

* * *

**Confessional: I'd have strangled him a long time ago if I had arms or hands!**

**Kasimar: Technically it wasn't cheating; Chris only said I couldn't use the spikes. He said nothing about the blunt end did he? **(Kasimar smirks to the camera triumphantly).

**Nakia: It was fun seeing that Hispanic Horse get hurt; and I didn't even have to do anything!**

* * *

Everyone was gathered outside the balloon arena and most were scowling at Kasimar who seemed not to care at all.

"Well everyone; that was a good mini game … though it was a bit loud." Said Chris with a happy smirk. "I can guarantee that Lavender, Jimmy and Barney are safe … but I'm wondering if Kasimar broke the rules by hitting Quana with the stick."

"Actually I didn't." Pointed out Kasimar. "You said we couldn't hit each other with the spikes. You never said a single word about the blunt end."

"You're right … I didn't!" said Chris with sadistic cheerfulness. "Now that that's cleared up it looks like Kasimar is through to the next mini game and Quana is eliminated from the challenge."

The silence was deafening; a split second later almost every began to yell and complain about how unfair and biased this was. Chris simply took out his air horn and pressed the button. The resulting noise made everyone be quiet.

"Sorry everyone; but he didn't break any rules, and I can't disqualify somebody for not doing anything wrong … that wouldn't be hair, would it?" Smiled Chris in a purely sadistic way. "Anyway; let's get onto the next challenge, we still have three more to go."

* * *

**Confessional: Hands up if you want to buy a powerful handgun and shoot Chris in the dick!**

**Jimmy: This is the most unfair challenge yet! Kasimar SO should have been disqualified from the challenge. Aren't reality TV host's supposed to be fair and not have favorites? That's what I thought anyway.**

**Quana: My head kinda hurts a little. **(Quana rubs the back of her head and winces before smiling slyly). **But **_**maybe**_** Spider can kiss it better! Heehee!**

**Lavender: By any chance is Chris a demon that has somehow escaped from hell or something?**

**Chris:** (he looks proud).** That's what my classmates used to say back in high school!**

* * *

The campers were son standing in front of their cabins and were looking at four slightly statues of Chef Hatchet.

"Ok everyone; for this mini game you have you use metal bats to destroy these ugly statues of the even uglier Chef Hatchet." Smirked Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: That's a little tactless don't you think?**

**Chef: I'm not that ugly … am I? … I got injured in NAAM ok! Pretty Boy has absolutely **_**no**_** respect for brave soldiers! Grrrr!**

* * *

"This challenge should be a breeze." Said Kasimar confidently as he readied his metal baseball bat.

"That statue looks as ugly as you Kasimar! Yohohoho!" Laughed Barney while Kasimar snarled.

"Ok everyone; just destroy your statue and you win it's that easy." Smirked Chris. "When I say go you can begin whacking."

"Three"

"Two"

"Two and a half"

"One"

"Zero point five"

"Go!"

Barney, Jimmy, Lavender and Kasimar began to beat the heck out of the statues in front of them. Kasimar quickly sent one of the arms crumbling to little pieces. He whacked the chest and head alternatively to cause as much damage as possible.

Lavender wasn't having much difficulty as she smacked the sides of the statue in hopes that she could knock it in half and continue the destruction from there. She whacked the side hard and a few crumbled pieces of rock and some dust flew off.

Barney was going for the head and was going to work his way down; he figured that the more pressure he put on the stature from above the easier it would be to make the statue crumble when it became unable to support it's own weight.

Jimmy was having a few more problems than the others were. He wasn't as strong as they all were so couldn't hit the statue as hard as his teenage competition could. Jimmy swung the bat at the legs in hopes of making the statue topple over and get damaged further. As Jimmy futilely smacked the statue he remembered some advice Ted had told him before Jimmy left for the show.

"_If you want to bring somebody down … then kick them in the balls_!"

"_Thank you Ted_." Thought Jimmy as he positioned the bat properly and swung it upwards full force into the statues groined area.

A single second later the stature fell to pieces and lay broken on the floor. It no longer resembled Chef Hatchet but instead looked like nothing more than a completely worthless pile of rubble.

"And Jimmy is through to the next mini game!" Announced Chris.

"What the #bleep#?" Swore Kasimar upon seeing Jimmy's demolished statue. "Die you #bleep# stupid statue! I want to win!"

Kasimar swung a hard hit to the chest of the stature and it was smashed apart and into little tiny pieces. Kasimar grinned to himself and cackled in delight upon seeing that he had completely annihilated his statue.

"Kasimar has destroyed his statue and is through to the next mini game as well!" Said Chris a lot louder than was necessary.

"Be quiet! My ears are already hurting after the balloon popping challenge!" Whined Nakia while stomping her feet.

"Really? Sorry … sorry for not being even louder! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he slapped his knee in amusement.

Lavender and Barney were going head to head. Both of their statues were pretty beaten up and cracked all over. Lavender reared back her bat for a last whack; she summoned her strength and swung as hard as she could.

SMASH!

Lavender's statue was smashed apart with that last swing of the metal baseball bat. Chris pressed the activation button on his air horn which both got everyone's attention and also made everyone cover their ears.

"And that's the end of that mini game!" Announced Chris happily as he pressed his air horn again thus making everyone cover their ears once more.

"What was the point in that?" Asked Eleanor as she flinched from the ear killing noise.

"I did it to upset you all; why else? Haha!" Laughed Chris in malice.

"I guess I'm out then." Shrugged Barney indifferently. "Oh well; I'll just have to do better next time!"

"You're optimism is very admirable Barney." Smiled Lavender as she hugged Barney.

"The softness of your skin and hair is also admirable as well as enviable." Grinned Barney.

"Enough of the flirting! Get the attention back to me where it should be." Whined Chris while looking like he was going to have a temper tantrum. "Ok; due to the result of this mini game the last three in the challenge are Jimmy, Kasimar and Lavender. Interestingly they are consecutive in alphabetical order."

"You know what else is interesting." Asked Barney.

"No; what?" Asked Chris with a small bit of interest.

"That you are even uglier than a football fish! Yohohoho!" Laughed Barney.

Soon everyone else joined in laughing at Chris while Chris himself screamed in anger and began to wail in rage.

* * *

**Confessional: Is a football fish like American football or English football?**

**Barney: Chris just makes it too easy … and he kind of … well; actually he definitely had that coming yaaar!**

**Eleanor: Barney always knows how to make everyone laugh; just liker Jimmy in a way.**

**Tabitha: Ok; I admit that was a little tiny bit amusing; football fish are pretty ugly.**

**Quana: I didn't think adults burst into tears that easily.**

**Chris: **(He is crying like a little baby).** Waaaaaaah! Boohoohoohoo! Barney's a meanie! Waaaah!**

**Chef: Serves pretty boy right for calling me ugly!**

* * *

After Chris had finished having yet anther one of his episodes and crying in the confessional he led the campers to the Mess Hall. While the six campers eliminated from the challenge sat to the side by an unused chair, Jimmy, Kasimar and Lavender sat at a table that Chris told them to for the next mini game.

"Ok you three; your next challenge should bring back memories of day thirteen." Said Chris with a sadistic smirk. "Specifically I mean the challenge called 'pig out or puke'."

"Please don't tell me we're doing that again." Groaned Lavender.

"Sorta; this time we are doing a three course disgusting meal. The last person to finish … or the first person to puke … is eliminated!" Said Chris over dramatically.

"You're a real large ham." Piped up Eleanor as she sat with her head in her hands.

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris with an ugly mean frown. "Anyway; Chef Hatchet! Bring out the meals!"

Chef Hatchet walked out of the kitchen with three trays of presumably highly disgusting food. He set one down in front of each of the three campers still in the challenge.

"Pretty simple mini game right?" Asked Chris before smirking horribly as ever. " But of course; if you have a weak stomach it might be harder! Haha!"

"Oh man; this is really _not_ going to be fun." Mumbled Lavender as she looked at the food they had to eat.

On each tray was a bowl of soup, a slice of pie and a drink in a glass. But the soup was dead cockroaches in moldy mushy peas, the pie had a stale and moldy crust and it's filling was mayonnaise and sprouts. The drink was no more merciful and was made from lumpy and way past it's sell by date milk.

"So to recap; to win you have to finish the food or not be the first to puke." Said Chris with a look of amusement at the expressions on the campers faces. "Anyway; let's begin when I say go!"

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Zero point five"

"Go!"

Kasimar picked up the drink of lumpy chunky milk and quickly gulped it down. He looked absolutely sickened and repulsed by it but continued as he moved onto the pie.

Lavender started with the soup and had an expression of suffering as she ate one of the dead cockroaches; she gagged in disgust as she forced herself to swallow it. She groaned in misery when she saw that there were still three cockroaches still to eat as well as the rest of the soup.

"_At least they aren't alive_." Thought Lavender with mild thankfulness that was overshadowed by the queasiness in her stomach.

Jimmy took a big bite of the pie and swallowed quickly to avoid tasting more than he had to. He forced himself with all of his will power to finish it. It was a disgusting and awful food but Jimmy managed to finish it; he then whimpered in sickness when he saw that he still had to eat the soup and finish the lumpy milk.

Kasimar had quickly force fed himself the soup and now felt almost ready to vomit. It took every ounce of his negative will power to stop himself from spewing chunks. Kasimar coughed sickly as he gulped the last of the moldy mushy pea soup.

"Is this what death tastes like?" Asked Kasimar out loud.

"No; it's called karma." Said Quana with her arms crossed.

"Very *cough* true." Agreed Spider.

Kasimar looked at the pie he still had to eat and picked it up; he gulped in misery as he started to force feed himself.

Jimmy and Lavender both picked up their respective glasses of lumpy and highly gone off milk. Both began to drink it while wincing something awful. Jimmy managed to finish his and held his gut to stop himself from puking. Lavender swayed on her chair and seemed almost catatonic from the dreadful hellish meal.

"I can't … go on." Gagged Lavender. "…I'm gonna be sick!"

Lavender ran over to an open window by the door of the mess hall and puked out of it and groaned.

"And with that dose of puke it looks like Jimmy and Kasimar are going to be participating in the final mini game of the challenge!" Announced Chris. "And … you two can both go and puke if you want to; seriously, you both look like you're both going to die any second!"

Jimmy and Kasimar ran off to the communal washrooms to be sick while Chris chuckled sadistically to himself.

"Man I truly do love my job!" Cackled Chris. "This is totally awesome! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: I sense a confessional montage coming on!**

**Barney: Chris is such an asshole yaaar!**

**Eleanor: What a prick!**

**Jimmy: What a nasty horrible man!**

**Kasimar: What a #so TOTALLY censored# that guy is!**

**Lavender: What a shit head!**

**Nakia: What a vile split end!**

**Quana: Chris is worse than Scar from the Lion king!**

**Spider: What an intolerable ***cough*** jackassed bigot!**

**Tabitha: What a sad strange little man … he has my pity.**

**Chris: Oh they're just jealous or something. Haha!**

* * *

After Jimmy and Kasimar had finished being sick Chris led them and the other seven campers to the final challenge. An arena had been set up. It was shaped like a rectangle and on each end was a goal along with a small bumper car type vehicle with a joystick on it. Jimmy was sitting in one and Kasimar was sitting in the other.

"Ok everyone; the last mini game of the challenge is here. This one is going to decide who wins immunity." Explained Chris. "The objective is to not let too many balls get into your goal. The first person to let in ten balls loses and will suffer a … special surprise! Haha!"

"This is a little like pong." Noted Jimmy. "So what's the joystick for?"

"Use it to move your bumper car left and right; it can't go in any other directions." Explained Chris. "Now let's get ready to rumble!"

"It's a battle as old *cough* as time; evil and wicked VS *cough* good and kind." Said Spider philosophically as he sat in a seat next to Quana holding hands with her.

"Those would be good lyrics for a song of some kind." Smiled Quana before turning to face the mini game. "C'mon Jimmy! Send that monster through the shredder!"

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Go!" Yelled Chris as he sounded his air horn.

From pipes beside Jimmy and Kasimar's goals metal balls that ere perfectly spherical rolled out and began to move towards each camper's goal. Jimmy and Kasimar moved to block the balls and send them back at their opponent.

"You can't beat me you little rat!" Taunted Kasimar as he sent a ball into Jimmy's goal.

"I'd rather be a rat than a demon." Replied Jimmy as he knocked a ball back towards Kasimar and into his goal.

As Jimmy and Kasimar went head to head to determine who would receive immunity the others were watching the mini game; Barney was bouncing up and down in his seat looking excited.

"Ooo! Could this finally be the time where Kasimar fails to win immunity and gets voted off?" Asked Barney to the others.

"I couldn't care less than I already do." Said Nakia snootily as she brushed her hair.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm so excited I just wet myself! LOL!**

**Eleanor: Go Jimmy! Give that big bad bully his karma!**

**Tabitha: If Kasimar doesn't win I'm going to have to think of a way to save him … and that is not going to be easy at all.**

* * *

Both Jimmy and Kasimar had let balls into their goals but Jimmy truly did have experience with Party games like he had said, he was managing to last against Kasimar. Kasimar was getting angry as Jimmy blasted another ball into his goal and snarled obnoxiously.

"It's sudden death!" Announced Chris dramatically. "Whoever lets in the next ball loses!"

Kasimar narrowed his eyes at the kid in the bumper car opposite him; Kasimar sent three balls that rolled towards him shooting over to Jimmy.

"Eat this!" Jeered Kasimar.

With quick reflexes Jimmy whacked the balls forcefully off his bumper kart and while two shot towards Kasimar one slowly rolled towards his goal.

Kasimar sent the fast balls back at Jimmy though they slowed down. He didn't notice the slow moving ball coming at him … until it was too late.

The ball entered Kasimar's goal.

"And Jimmy wins!" Announced Chris while in reality feeling disappointed that Kasimar lost.

"What? Nooooooooooo!" Wailed Kasimar.

BOING!

The seat in Kasimar's bumper car lurched upwards on a spring and sent Kasimar flying up in to the air screaming and down into the lake with a big splash.

* * *

**Confessional: It has finally happened!**

**Lavender: And so the might have fallen! Yeehaw!**

**Spider: Looks like Kasimar has finally ***cough* **failed to win immunity. Sweet!**

* * *

"Well that's the challenge." Said Chris as the nine campers, including a dripping wet Kasimar, were standing before him. "Jimmy is immune at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony so you cannot vote him off. Anyone else is fair game though."

"Goodbye Kasimar." Said lavender with a look of satisfaction.

"Amen to that." Agreed Quana.

"The Bonfire Ceremony isn't for two hours so feel free to relax before you cast your votes." Said Chris. "I'm going to relax with another massage. Ciao losers."

Chris left for a massage from some VERY unlucky girl while most of the campers glared at Kasimar.

"Enjoy your last few hours on the island … jerk." Said Eleanor.

As the campers dispersed Tabitha signaled Kasimar and Nakia with her eyes with nobody but they noticed.

* * *

**Confessional: Time for some last minute scheming.**

**Tabitha: Now to think of a plan to keep Kasimar in the game; he's a necessary tool for my victory.**

* * *

Kasimar, Nakia and Tabitha stood close together in the forest. Nakia was brushing her hair and Kasimar looked both angry and worried.

"Ok Tabitha; what now?" Asked Kasimar in almost frantic anger. "I lost the challenge to that stupid kid and I'm gonna get #bleep# voted off! For your own safety you #bleep# better have an idea that can save me!"

"I'm trying to think of something." Said Tabitha as she strained her brain for a solution. "It's just that I don't think I can convince anyone to vote for somebody other than you."

"Well get thinking then!" Snarled Kasimar.

"It's a shame we can't talk them out of voting at all." Muttered Nakia.

"It is a shame; it's not like we can stop them from casting a vote." Said Tabitha as she continued thinking. A couple of seconds later Tabitha suddenly seemed to have been struck with an idea. "But maybe we can…"

"Do you have an idea?" Asked Kasimar.

"I think I do … but we have to be quick and cast our voted before anybody else to make it work." Said Tabitha. "Now let's go and vote somebody off."

* * *

It was late at night on Wawanakwa Island. The nine campers were seated on stumps and logs around the camp fire, just about everyone was glaring at Kasimar and seemed certain he was going to go … and maybe he was. Kasimar himself had his arms crossed and looked indifferent as he ignored everyone.

Chris soon arrived with a tray of eight marshmallows. He set them down on the oil drum like he had done in every ceremony prior to this one and picked one of them up. He then began to speak.

"When I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The campers who does not get a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means you are out of the contest … and you can never come back … ever."

Before Chris began handing out the marshmallows he said one more thing.

"Also; I am required to tell you something. While the votes were being cast the camera become unplugged … so not every person had their vote counted." Said Chris; he smirked at the looks on the campers faces and added. "But enough were counted to have a clear majority on who to send home."

"Goodbye Kasimar; it's been a real displeasure knowing somebody as awful as you." Scowled Lavender. Kasimar just remained silent.

"The first marshmallow of the night belongs to Jimmy as he has won immunity." Said Chris.

Jimmy got up from his seat next to Eleanor on a log and smiled as he claimed his marshmallow.

"Lavender"

…

…

"Tabitha"

…

…

"Eleanor"

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…

…

"Barney"

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…

…

"Nakia"

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

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…

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Kasimar."

"WHAT!" Yelled most of the campers as the horrible sociopath smugly claimed his marshmallow.

"Yeah; none of the presumably many votes for Kasimar were counted … so this elimination should be _really_ Interesting and dramatic." Smirked Chris in pure sadism.

Spider and Quana were sitting next to each others in shock and realized that they were the only ones without a marshmallow. One of them was about to be eliminated. Spider and Quana tightly held hands in terror at this awful turn of events.

"Spider and Quana, Quana and Spider." Smirked Chris as he tossed the final marshmallow up and caught it. "Two lovers … a couple that is about to be separated by this tasty marshmallow. The final marshmallow of tonight's dramatic ceremony goes to

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

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Spider."

If spider was happy about being safe he certainly wasn't showing as he sat rooted to the spot; stunned that his beloved had just been voted off.

"Well Quana; that's it for you. Goodbye and get off my island! Haha!" Laughed Chris with a sneer.

"Wait! I'll give her *cough* my safety!" Said Spider quickly. "I'll go instead!"

"Sorry Spider; no can do." Said Chris as he waggled his finger mockingly. "I think that you being here heartbroken will be great for ratings! So it's goodbye to Quana!"

"Yeah! Take a hike you Hispanic horse … no wait! You're more of a trampy Hispanic Mule!" Jeered Nakia tactlessly.

Quana calmly got to her feet and waked over to Nakia.

SMACK!

Quana slapped Nakia across the face full force with all the strength she could muster.

"Get … out … of … my … sight." Said Quana in a deadly whisper.

Nakia whimpered in fear and took off running; Kasimar snuck away as well when nobody was looking. Quana turned to spider who looked heartbroken.

"Quana … how could this *cough* have happened?" Asked Spider as a tear left his eye.

"Shhh. Don't worry." Said Quana in her soothing voice as she gently hugged Spider close to her.

"How can I not worry *cough* when Kasimar is still here and you're *cough* unfairly going?" Asked Spider miserably.

"Be brave Spider; you'll be ok. Stay strong." Said Quana as she continued hugging spider.

"How are you *cough* not upset?" Asked Spider in wonder.

"…Because some things are worth more than a million dollars." Replied Quana.

Spider and Quana looked into each others eyes and kissed one last time before Quana had to go. After holding it for a full minute they parted and Quana gave a wave to everyone and managed to smile despite feeling quite sad.

"See you around everyone. Make Kasimar suffer for me; and make sure Nakia gets her karma as well." Said Quana before her voice cracked a little. "I'll miss you all."

Quana looked at spider and smiled that angelic smile of hers.

"Especially you." Whispered Quana.

Quana walked the dock of shame calmly and boarded the boat of losers, Spider walked along the dock and managed to smile at his girlfriend.

"Goodbye Quana." Said Spider with a wave. "I love you."

"I love you too Spider." Cooed Quana softly as the boat drove away into the moonlit night.

Spider kept waving until the boat was out of sight; after that he dropped to his knees and willingly let his tears escape his eyes and flow down his cheeks.

* * *

**Confessional: Waaaaaaaaaaaa! Somebody pass the tissues! Boohoo!**

**Nakia: All's well that ends well! I survive another elimination ceremony and that Hispanic Horse hits the road. And best of all … Spider is crying! Oh happy day!**

(The door to the confessional opens; Spider appears, he grabs Nakia by her shoulders and with quite some force he tosses her out of the confessional and a heavy 'thump'; sound and a groan of pain are heard).

**Spider: Why? Why must I suffer so ***cough* **much? Between Nakia and Kasimar's bullying, getting** *cough*** poisoned, being terminally sick and losing my ***cough*** girlfriend. I'm a guy, I shouldn't be so** *sneeze* **soft … but I'm a soft person. …Why did it have to be Quana *cough* who got voted off? **(Spider hangs his head and sobs in misery as a few tears drop off his face).

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a big sadistic smile on his face.

"And thus ends THE most dramatic episode yet! Quana has been unfairly voted off, though I'll allow it, and Spider is actually crying! Haha! Will the show get any more dramatic? What will the next challenge be? Can Spider continue without Quana? Will Jimmy follow up on his feelings for Eleanor? What will Kasimar do next? And who will be the next person voted off? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Barney: Kasimar (not recorded)

Eleanor: Kasimar (not recorded)

Jimmy: Kasimar (not recorded)

Kasimar: Quana

Lavender: Kasimar (not recorded)

Nakia: Spider

Quana: Kasimar (not recorded)

Spider: Kasimar (not recorded)

Tabitha: Quana

Quana: 2

Spider: 1

Votes not recorded: 6

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana

* * *

And that ends what was possible the hardest chapter I have had to write so far. I can hear the angry mob forming so let me explain. For the plot to properly work Quana had to go. She was one of my most beloved favorite and believe me, this is like the last thing I wanted to do … but it had to be done. You'll see her in a few episodes though so don't worry. In the end Nakia, Tabitha and Kasimar will all get their karma … but until then we must say goodbye to our favorite Hispanic singer for now. Remember everyone; this story DOES have a happy ending.

Next time: Oh no! Another barrel! Curse you Donkey Kong!


	47. Day 22, Part 1, Auntie Eleanor

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his story that I recommend you read called Total Drama Alphabet (Go Todd!). I do however own all twenty eight of the OC's in this story so please do not steal them, ok? Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains Hair related Discrimination, scheming, a fully grown man crapping his pants, baby ferrets and some love. But it is nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Crag's interesting Fact: **Fifi was originally created as a form of retaliation against Hardcore Feminists who hate men and act sexist themselves yet think they can get away with it because they are women. However; I filled out her character after chapter one was posted; I saw potential in her despite the fact she didn't last very long. Bet you didn't know that!

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Hey guys and girls as well. Total Drama Revenge of the Island is on its way as we all know. Just a couple more months and it will be here, maybe less. What do you guys think the season will be like? I've seen some people say it will suck because there isn't any 'Duncney' in it, to them I say grow up! Couples break up all the time. But personally I think it's gonna ROCK! Seriously; there's a Moonchild Wicca, a guy with multi personality disorder, a military cadet, and more. I think that going back to Wawanakwa Island will make up for how abysmal and crap the Season That Must Never Be Named was. Once it airs I'll have to include it in the disclaimer.

Hey apple! Hey apple! Hey apple! … Knife! Hahahahahahaha!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame; it was early morning on Wawanakwa, sunrise to be exact, and Chris was looking like he was in a very good mood, probably due to the huge amount of ratings that the previous episode had bought in. With a couple of wild and grand gestures with his arms Chris began the recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The final nine campers competed in a totally original mini game challenge that was NOT a rip off of Mario Party in any way whatsoever. Seriously; it wasn't! There were a total of eight mini games for the nine campers to take part in, with one camper being eliminated per game until one was left standing, obviously the person who would receive immunity."

"The first mini game was relatively simple; a breath holding contest. Nakia was quickly eliminated due to some interference from an octopus and she also knocked herself unconscious much to everybody's amusement. Haha!"

"After that came a sudden death luck based button pressing mini game. If one of the campers pressed a certain button they would be catapulted into the air and into the water hundreds of feet below. Spider was eliminated when he pressed button number four. Err, hello? Four is the number of death in Asia! It's obvious! And for some reason Quana got angry when Kasimar squeezed her ass so she punched him over the edge of the platform and into the water far below."

"Next was a dancing mini game; specifically Dance Dance Revolution. Some campers passed with flying colors, like Quana, Lavender and Barney, while others like Eleanor just flat out sucked! Then again; Kasimar did throw a rock at Eleanor. Oh, and did I mention the campers would be electrocuted every time they screwed up? Haha! Either way Eleanor was eliminated from the challenge for scoring the lowest."

"The next mini game was simple indeed; all the remaining six campers had to do was raise a flag to the top of a flagpole with a crank. Pretty easy in my opinion. I, ahem, 'forgot' to mention the last person to raiser their flagpole would get a painful electric shock. Tabitha came last and found this little detail out the hard way! Haha!"

"The remaining five campers then had to pop balloons. To put it in more detail they had to pop all of their allocated colored of loud popping Balloons that Wallace made! Kasimar knocked Quana unconscious due to a loophole he found in the rules. Due to this Quana failed pop all of the purple balloons and was eliminated."

"I then made the campers take part in a mini game where they had to break statues of Chef Hatchet to pieces. Against the odds it was Jimmy who finished first … because he hit the statue in the crotch. Kasimar finished shortly after and it came down to Barney and Lavender. Lavender managed to break her statue before Barney could break his and so Barney was out."

"The penultimate mini game was a call back to the Pig Out Or Puke challenge that I forced the campers into back on day thirteen … except this time Spider didn't get poisoned by apple juice! Haha! Lavender was eliminated because she was the first to puke. That left Jimmy and Kasimar to battle it out in the final mini game."

"The last mini game was inspired by pong; an all time classic of an arcade game. The first person to let in ten balls would lose the challenge. Despite everything Jimmy managed to beat Kasimar and our resident bully was catapulted up high and then down into the lake."

"It looked pretty certain that Kasimar was going to be voted off … but Tabitha didn't want to lose her alliance member. She may not like him but if Tabitha wants to win she needs Kasimar, so she claims. Tabitha and her alliance managed to cast their votes before anybody else did; after casting her vote Tabitha unplugged the confessional camera. This meant only three votes had been recorded … and none of them were for Kasimar!"

"At the Bonfire Ceremony, much to everyone's shock and possible horror it came down to Spider and Quana. Spider got the final marshmallow and Quana was voted off with a mere two votes against her. Spider was heartbroken and sobbed in the confessional. It's always fun to laugh at other people when they suffer … except when it's me that is! Haha!"

"Only eight campers remain; who will be the next person voted off? Will Kasimar and Nakia's reputations sink any lower? Will anyone jump over barrels? And will Spider resort to self harm now that his girlfriend is gone? Haha! Good one Chris! Well; find out all of these questions, and more, tight now on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

Eleanor was sleeping in her bed; her hat was placed on the bedside cupboard between the bunks that her ferret cage. It hadn't been a very good night's sleep for her; Kasimar had weaseled his way out of his well deserved elimination and Quana had took the fall … all because the confessional camera had been unplugged. Now Eleanor was alone in the Team Puzzle girl's side as Nakia was now bunking with Tabitha. Eleanor was sad one of her best friends had been unfairly voted off … but she knew Spider was probably feeling absolutely miserable.

The sound of soft ferrity squeaks made Eleanor stir from her slumber and open her eyes; Eleanor sat up and rubbed them while yawning sleepily. Eleanor turned to her cage to say good morning to Frost and Dandelion.

"Good morning guys." Said Eleanor as she looked into the cage with a sweet smile. "Did you sleep … well…?"

Eleanor trailed off as she realized what she was seeing; Frost and Dandelion were in the cage, nothing unusual there, but what had made Eleanor go silent was the fact that curled up against Dandelion and suckling on her for their first feed … where three lightly furred baby ferrets.

Eleanor's eyes widened as a big gleeful smile broke out onto her face as she held in the urge to squee and scream in delight.

"Dandelion had her babies." Whispered Eleanor excitedly. "The babies are here! … Jimmy!"

Eleanor ran out of the cabin for a few moments and returned less than ten seconds later with Jimmy in tow who was just putting on his hat.

"What is it Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy as she led him over to the cage.

"See for yourself." Beamed Eleanor sunnily as she gestured to her ferrets.

"… Incredible! The babies are here! That's wonderful." Said Jimmy with a huge genki smile. "Looks like you're an aunt!"

"Isn't this just the best? I feel so warm and glowey." Grinned Eleanor as she looked over her ferrets with adoration.

Without another word Eleanor hugged Jimmy tightly much to his surprise and secret delight.

"Happy much?" Asked Jimmy with a chuckle.

"Very much so." Replied Eleanor still smiling.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm going to be an uncle! Wait … is that even possible?**

**Eleanor: This is every pet owners dream! Hmm; I wonder what I should do for names. …I'll think of something by the end of the day I bet!**

**Jimmy: It's nice to be hugged isn't it? Plus those baby ferrets were so cutesy!**

* * *

As Eleanor released Jimmy from the hug Barney walked into the cabin as he tied his long blond hair into a pony tail.

"You two cabin kids look mighty happy about something yaaar." Smiled Barney with his usual semi serious semi crazy expression.

"Dandelion had her babies!" Exclaimed Eleanor with hardly suppressed excitement.

"The circle of life strikes again yaaar!" Grinned Barney as he looked at the ferret family. "What are you going to name them?"

"I haven't decided yet." Said Eleanor as she looked at the ferrets. "You can help me decide if you want."

"Sounds fun." Said Barney before seemingly gaining an idea. "I'll go and get Spider; maybe he'd like to see the newborns … only that he wasn't in the cabin yaaar. Do any of you know where he is?"

"I'm afraid not." Said Jimmy. "He looked really upset last night; I think Quana getting voted off hit him hard."

"Especially because it was unfair." Added Eleanor. "I know for a fact none of us voted for Quana; if that camera hadn't become unplugged Kasimar would be gone and Quana would still be here. I bet it was Kasimar who unplugged the camera. Cheating meanie!"

"I could think of worse insults; but I understand." Chuckled Barney. "Well; I'll go and look for Spider me hearties. He could probably use some comforting."

Barney walked to the door to go and look for Spider but turned back to say one more thing.

"Oh; and congratulations on getting to the final eight you two!" Saluted Barney as he galloped off full speed to find Spider.

"You are what you eat I suppose." Chuckled Jimmy.

"…What do you mean by that?" Asked Eleanor sounding a little confused.

"I mean that Barney has probably been eating nuts and thus he is nuts; get it?" Joked Jimmy.

Eleanor laughed at the joke which made Jimmy smile.

* * *

**Confessional: You are what you eat! Mmmm; Pickles!**

**Eleanor: I think that even Nakia can't spoil today; I sure hope not anyway. The babies being born has put me in a very good mood! Well; even better than usual anyway!**

**Jimmy: Eleanor being so happy kind of makes me happy as well.** (Jimmy sighs dreamily). **I like that girl … I wonder if Barney could help me get her attention like he did with Spider. It worked after all.**

**Barney: Looks like Eleanor's morale is going to be high from now on. Kind of the opposite of what Spider is feeling right now savvy? I know I'd be upset about losing Lavender yaaar so I guess I can relate to him. Well … time to commence Operation Cheer Up Spider About Losing Quana, or C.U.S.A.L.Q as an acronym. Acronyms are such great fun yaaar!**

* * *

Spider was sitting gloomily on the dock of shame; his legs dangled over the side while he had his head in his hands as he looked out at the horizon where Quana had left the previous night.

Spider felt very sad that his girlfriend had been voted off; it wasn't fair at all! He knew for a fact that almost everyone had voted for Kasimar; even if the votes hadn't been recorded it was obvious Kasimar still would have had the most. But Chris, being the dickheaded douche that he was, eliminated Quana instead.

"It just isn't *cough* fair." Mumbled Spider miserably. "Somebody so nice is going *cough* and a truly _horrible_ person is staying."

Due to his illnesses and sickness Spider had accepted years ago he'd never find somebody to love him; yet upon meeting Quana that had all changed. She didn't care about his illness and loved him all the same. Coming to this twisted reality show was the best thing that had ever happened to Spider in his opinion.

Spider's biggest problem was that he was on the same island as Kasimar and Nakia, both of whom hated him. Quana was no longer here to help him stand up to them … so the coming days would be tough, if he even lasted that long.

"It's not like I'll never see *cough* her again though." Whispered Spider to himself. "I'll see her once the show ends and we're *sneeze* all at the Playa des losers."

Spider reached into his pocket and took out a photo he had taken with the camera that his parents had sent him. Barney had taken the picture; it was one of Spider and Quana hugging and giving the peace sign to the camera with their free hands. Spider looked at the picture and managed to smile.

"You wanted me to continue *cough* on without you and so *cough* I shall." Said Spider as he pocketed the picture again.

* * *

**Confessional: I walk this lonely road, the only one that I have ever known.**

**Spider: Then again that is much easier said ***cough* **than done. Now that Quana isn't here Nakia is ***cough* **probably going to attack me. **(Spider gulps and shivers). **I should have bought body armour** *hard cough*** with me!**

* * *

Spider sat on the dock of shame silently for a few minutes, alone with his thoughts. After a little while of silence he felt a hand on his shoulder; a moment later Barney sat down beside him.

"The waters nice today isn't it me heartie?" Asked Barney as he looked out at the waves that flowed against the dock.

"I guess." Mumbled Spider.

"You're sad aren't you Spider." Said Barney in understanding. "It's a shame that you can't see Quana in a bikini anymore isn't it?"

"Barney!" Frowned Spider.

Barney held his hands up in mock surrender and chuckled.

"I'm just trying to cheer you up me heartie." Said Barney apologetically. "It must be sad to be separated from the girl of your dreams so unfairly."

"Yeah; it is *cough* pretty sad." Agreed Spider as he hung his head.

"I smell an understatement." Said Barney seriously. "You know Spider; Quana may be gone but she's still here."

"I'm sorry Barney but *cough* I don't follow." Said Spider as he raised an eyebrow.

"I mean that she's right here." Said Barney wisely as he poked Spider's chest. "Anyway; you can't say sad forever cabin boy."

"I know; but how would you feel if Lavender was voted off?" Asked Spider glumly.

"I'd feel as sad as a starfish getting eaten by a shark yaaar." Replied Barney. "But if you focus on what you've left behind then you'll never see what lies ahead."

"The way things are going I can *cough* see Kasimar's victory up ahead." Sighed Spider sadly.

"You know Spider; there is a wise old saying I learned from a very good movie me heartie." Said Barney after a few second of silence.

"What's *cough* that?" Asked Spider interestedly.

"Yesterday is _history_, tomorrow is a _mystery_ … but today is a _gift. _That is why they call it the present." Said Barney as he looked out at the waves. "And you don't seem very happy to receive your present. Nothing happens without a cause you know … and sometimes even though bad things happen; everything ends up alright. Kind of like Cinderella yaaar!"

Spider was silent for a moment and then he started to smile.

"You know Barney; you could *cough* be a motivational speaker." Said Spider while sounding a lot happier than he had been a few moments ago. "Because you've just motivated me to cheer up."

"Glad to be of service me heartie." Said Barney with a bow. "And who knows me heartie; maybe if you win this competition Quana will reward you with second base!"

"Barney!" Groaned Spider with an extreme blush of huge embarrassment.

"What? Just saying…" Chuckled Barney. "Oh; and I've got something else to tell you."

"What that? Please tell *cough* me that Kasimar was disqualified."

"Sadly no; it's that Eleanor pet ferret Dandelion has had her baby's yaaar!" Grinned Barney. "Want to go and see them?"

"Sure; I could do with *cough* something to get Quana off my mind at *cough* least for a few minutes." Smiled Spider as he and Barney got to their feet.

"Off we go! Hip hip hooray!" Announced Barney.

"Err … don't you mean 'up, up and away'?" Asked Spider just to be sure.

"That too! Up up and awaaaaaay!" Cheered Barney as he took off back to camp while Spider trailed behind him.

* * *

**Confessional: Up, up and away to the sky above! It would be stars but it's daytime.**

**Barney: It never hurts to help … unless you have to go into a cactus field to find someone's house keys; that would hurt. Not that I've done that of course, I'm allergic to Cacti.**

**Spider: I feel better now; Barney's** *cough*** right. If I keep thinking of Quana's elimination then I'll ***cough* **always be depressed. He could be a** *cough*** psychiatrist easily.**

* * *

Lavender was sitting alone in the mess hall; none of the other seven campers had showed up for breakfast yet. Today's meal was chicken and sweet corn soup … except for the fact that both the chicken and the sweet corn were suspiciously absent.

"This tastes like pure chicken grease." Said Lavender coyly as she finished off the soup and pushed it away. "Who would want chicken grease by itself anyway?"

"Only the people who want the taste of grease without the chicken getting in the way." Said Chef as he poked his head out of the kitchen. "You'd be surprised what they sell on eBay. One person sold an unripe tomato with a pen drawn face on it for fifty dollars."

"Fascinating." Said Lavender dully as she put her head in her hands and stared into space for a few moments.

* * *

**Confessional: I found that information quite enlightening.**

**Lavender: This is my twenty second day on this god forsaken island; that's more than three weeks! … And Kasimar is **_**still**_** here. I bet he unplugged the camera last night to save himself … clever. Quana did **_**not**_** deserve to be eliminated like that. Kasimar is like an evil onion; you peel away one bit of evil and another is right below it!**

* * *

Lavender thought silently to herself for a couple of minutes; Kasimar surviving the last ceremony was something she didn't expect, and who knew when the next time he failed to win immunity would be.

"Hey Lavender." Said a voice that jerked her out of her thoughts.

Lavender turned her head and saw Jimmy standing next to her with a smile on his face.

"Oh, hello Jimmy." Said Lavender politely. "You look happy, what's up?"

"I have good news; you know Eleanor's pet ferret Dandelion was pregnant right?" Asked Jimmy.

"I was aware yes." Said Lavender while gaining an idea where this conversation was going.

"Well; when Eleanor woke up this morning she discovered that Dandelion had her babies!" Exclaimed Jimmy. "So now there are three baby ferrets besides Frost and Dandelion; would you like to come and see them?"

"Sure I will; they sound adorable." Smiled Lavender as she got off the chair.

"Also; I'd recommend not telling Kasimar about the newborn ferrets." Added Jimmy nervously. "Something tells me he doesn't love animals very much."

"That's a safe bet." Agreed Lavender. "My lips are sealed."

"Also; there is something I'd like to ask you … something personal." Added Jimmy.

"Ask away; I'm all ears." Smiled Lavender.

"How did Barney get you to be his girlfriend, out of curiosity?" Asked Jimmy with a straight face.

"Well; it just sort of happened really." Recalled Lavender with a blush. "We tended to flirt a little even before I started to fall for him. I guess we officially started going out when he comforted me after the fanfiction challenge when Chris insulted me."

"So he comforted you and that sealed the deal?" Said Jimmy with a smile.

"Pretty much … why are you asking anyway?" Asked Lavender with interest and curiosity.

"Well…" Began Jimmy before he trailed off and blushed.

Realization hit Lavender and she grinned like Barney usually would.

"Awww! You've got a crush on someone!" Giggled Lavender.

"Shhh! Not so loud." Said Jimmy frantically.

"Don't worry; I'll keep the secret … so; I'm going to take a guess and say you have a crush on Eleanor." Said Lavender with a big smile.

"…Yes; I kinda do." Admitted Jimmy. "I was going to ask Barney for help since he got Spider and Quana together."

"He may be crazy but that boy has talents." Swooned Lavender. "Well; just take it slow and don't blatantly hit on her; she might not like that."

"Should I take notes?" Asked Jimmy.

"Just be yourself." Advised Lavender. "I promise not to tell anyone. Now; let's go and see those baby ferrets!"

* * *

**Confessional: If I was myself I'd be as nerdy as Dwaine Dibbly! Red Dwarf FTW! **

**Lavender: Isn't that so sweet? Jimmy has a crush on Eleanor. It's no problem if I say it in here; he just didn't want me telling the other contestants. Hmm; I wonder how Barney is going to perform his matchmaking this time. **

**Jimmy: I asked Lavender if I was too young to start loving someone; she said anybody can fall in love at any age. It's good to know love isn't age rated like video games and movies are.**

**Barney: I don't know why but I be smelling a toy ship on the horizon yaaar!**

* * *

"It pains me to compliment a girl … but good job yesterday Tabitha." Said Kasimar as he smoked a cigarette. "The way Spider actually cried was flipping hilarious!"

"Well that was your one lifeline used up." Said Tabitha as she stood a little distance away so as to not breathe in any second hand cigarette smoke. "I doubt we could pull it of again; I bet the others will be double checking to make sure the camera is plugged in and turned on for every ceremony from now on."

"Well; we only needed it once anyway." Shrugged Kasimar. "I won't lose immunity again; no big loss in any way."

"I thought you liked Quana though?" Said Tabitha. "Or did you get over her?"

"I never exactly _liked_ her per say; I just wanted to screw her and have her give me h-." Said Kasimar perversely before Tabitha interrupted.

"Ok, I get it! Yeesh Kasimar! Get your head out of the gutter of the gutter itself!" Said Tabitha in repulsion.

"Nothing wrong with wanting to score with a girl; you're pretty hot yourself, care to flash me?" Grinned Kasimar.

"…You are an absolutely repulsive life form." Shuddered Tabitha in disgust. "I may not be very nice myself but at least I have slight standards!"

* * *

**Confessional: Such as?**

**Tabitha: I admit I'm not nice; far from it. But I wouldn't act in such a cringe worthy horrendous way. Kasimar makes some people I know look good … sorta.**

* * *

"Whatever; it doesn't bother me what anybody thinks of me anyway." Shrugged Kasimar indifferently as he puffed some smoke out of his mouth after taking a drag of his cigarette. "As long as I get the money and hurt people then I'm content."

Tabitha sighed to herself and mumbled a few words that Kasimar didn't quite hear.

"Well anyway; you need to win immunity this time; if you don't then you are most definitely going to be voted off." Assured Tabitha.

"What about Nakia? If I win immunity the retard will be on the chopping block like a chicken at a factory farm."

"Factory farms don't … never mind." Muttered Tabitha. "I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. In the meantime I expect you to get immunity and vote with me and Nakia. If I can convince somebody else to switch their vote to ours then it'll be a tie. I reckon that you could beat any of the others in a tie breaker."

"I could beat them at anything Chris could think of." Boasted Kasimar arrogantly.

"Except Pong I believe." Smirked Tabitha with a light giggle at Kasimar's loss to Jimmy the previous day.

"Shut it!" Screamed Kasimar in rage. "That was a fluke and it won't happen again! I could just cripple the kid for life to save us a bit of trouble."

"I don't think that will be necessary; Jimmy wouldn't have a chance … and I'm not fond of a one sided dirty fight, I'm not a roman emperor." Said Tabitha as she crossed her arms.

"You made me beat up Gary." Reminded Kasimar smugly.

"True; but he managed to fight back decently; Jimmy probably cannot; plus Jimmy is not a threat." Explained Tabitha coolly. "By the way; have you seen Nakia anywhere?"

"Last time I saw her she was brushing her hair on the beach." Said Kasimar as he remembered earlier. "She was crouched behind a rock looking at Spider with a grin that I think that impressively evil."

"Do you think she would hurt him?" Asked Tabitha.

"We can only hope." Smirked Kasimar.

"That's not exactly what I meant." Sighed Tabitha. "Whatever; I'll see you at the challenge, in the mean time I'm going to get breakfast; it may be gross but it's better than nothing I suppose.

* * *

**Confessional: I actually think that nothing would be the better option when compared with eating Chef Hatchet's crap cooking. Don't tell him I said that!**

**Tabitha: I hope I don't regret keeping Kasimar in this competition. He might be hard to beat in the finals so I'll backstab him in the final three or four. I just hope he doesn't backstab me first. As I've said to you before; I don't trust Kasimar as far as I can throw him.**

**Kasimar: It's too bad Quana left, in a way. I could have spied on her while she was naked in the shower; sadly I didn't get a chance to do that all competition. **(Kasimar lightly chuckles to himself)

* * *

Nakia was lying on the dock now that Spider had left. She brushed her hair with one hand and with the other she doodled a picture on a piece of paper. The picture was of Spider; though it wasn't a flattering picture in the slightest bit to say the least. It was a drawing of Spider getting hung; Nakia was the hangman, err, hangwoman and seemed to be laughing.

"If only this could be real." Said Nakia with a foul smile. "Well; maybe he'll do this to himself now that Quana is gone, that would really make my day."

Nakia folded the piece of paper until it was a small square at which point she pocketed it along with the pen.

"Just four more traitors to get rid off." Said Nakia to herself. "Maybe I'll save Spider for last; he deserves to suffer. And it's just so much fun upsetting him as well!"

Nakia got to her feet and began to walk back to camp while continuing to brush her brunette silky smooth hair with her comb in her right hand.

* * *

**Confessional: What 'hair-brained' scheme is Nakia thinking of?**

**Nakia: Did you ever get a feeling somebody just made a really lame pun? Well anyway; it's the last week of the contest and I'm going to win this whole thing! They should give me two cheques; one for winning and one for having great hair … and maybe, just maybe a third for making Spider homeless!** (Nakia laughs obnoxiously; cue the 'booing')

* * *

"Attention dumbass and stupid campers." Said Chris over the intercom. "It's time for your next challenge; and this one might be nostalgic for some of you. Report to the area to the west of camp; the bit near where the Labyrinth of Despair is. And do not be late because I have things to do, being that I'm awesome and all! Haha! That is all."

Chris hung up the intercom and there was silence for a moment.

"Wait for it." Said Barney in excitement.

"Any second now." Giggled Eleanor.

A second later a huge splattery fart sound echoed across camp.

"Aw man! I crapped my pants with diarrhea! Well; at least nobody heard that." Said Chris before a wail was heard. "…What? Oh no! It's still no! Oh #bleep# #bleep# #bleep#!"

The intercom switched off and the campers began to laugh at Chris's misfortune.

* * *

**Confessional: He really touched cloth with that one! LOL!**

**Eleanor: **(She is giggling merrily and laughing in amusement).

**Barney: **(He is laughing hysterics).

**Spider: **(He is laughing hard).

**Nakia: Eww! That was gross!**

**Jimmy: **(He is us9ng his hat to muffle his loud laughter).

**Lavender: **(She is trying to hold in her laughter but fails and starts laughing).

**Kasimar: Sucks to be Chris; I thought only retarded adults crapped themselves.**

**Tabitha: **(She shakes her head and groans). **That was disgusting and yet I was somehow amused by it. Maybe Chris should consider adult diapers or something.**

**Chris: Why does this keep happening to me? It's not fair! Waaaaah! All I ask for is every other person in existence to acknowledge I'm better than them and that they must serve me! Is that too much to ask for?**

* * *

And so chapter 47 ends in the most immature way possible; but it's just Chris so who the heck cares! Next chapter the Donkey Kong challenge will begin, it's sorta like an obstacle course. Another camper leaves the island and you may not expect it. Well; unless you've expected that person to lose in which case it isn't unexpected … nonetheless; it's a one in eight chance all around.


	48. Day 22, Part 2, Do a barrel roll

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains paintball, barrels, conveyer belts, kissing, overalls and hair related discrimination. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Crag's interesting Fact:** Before episode fourteen was written I was considering bringing Carlton back into the competition instead of Daisy. In the end I scrapped the idea and used Daisy because nobody would have voted for Carlton over Nakia even if he was annoying and scaredy. Bet you didn't know that!

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **Sorry for the delay everyone; this time my excuse is that I have started playing World of Warcraft. The game is amazing! I would recommend it to anyone. The Kobold Necromancer plays it so it HAS to be good in some way right? Well anyway; enough talking, let's get on with the episode!

Do a barrel roll! *rimshot*

* * *

Shortly after Chris crapped himself over the intercom the eight remaining camper stood in a field near camp. They could see the Labyrinth of Despair from the first challenge; it was almost creepy how it stood there without being used at all. But something else caught their attention.

What caught their eye even more was a large and pinky red construction site sort of obstacle course. It was around a hundred meters tall, quite possibly even more than that. It had ladders, conveyer belts and platforms that were moving up and down in a constant pace. It almost looked like something out of Donkey Kong, the game found at arcades.

Chris walked up to the campers with a clean pair of pants and underwear; he was trying to look like nothing had happened; but the campers had heard everything.

"Hey Chris; do you have to wear a diaper to bed?" Asked Barney with a goofy grin.

"Does your mum have to change your underwear?" Sneered Nakia.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris angrily. "What happened earlier is of no importance; I was merely suffering from food poisoning from Chef's cooking."

"Suuuuure you were." Said Lavender as she rolled her eyes.

"Shut up right now!" Barked Chris in a whiny voice while stomping his foot. "It doesn't matter! Drop it!"

"Like you dropped your guts?" Chuckled Jimmy.

"SHUT UP!" Screamed Chris. "If you don't stop making fun of me the next person to do so will get voted off and Kasimar will automatically win immunity!"

Everyone was silent while Kasimar smirked as if daring them to speak; it would work out better for him that way.

"Ok; thanks for shutting up." Said Chris while flashing his pearly whites for the camera. "Anyway; if you look behind me you can see a construction site obstacle course; this will be for today's challenge … and it is a little bit … _dangerous_. Haha!"

Some of the campers looked a little worried at what Chris implied by putting emphasis on the word dangerous. Chris continued while feeling better about himself due to making the campers worried.

"Today's challenge is going to be based on a game that was the very first appearance of somebody who is known for jumping, being Italian and … more jumping I suppose." Shrugged Chris before quickly continuing. "Today's challenge is going to be based on none other than the arcade game Donkey Kong!"

Jimmy cheered at this announcement and some of the others seemed to like the idea; Tabitha raised her hand as a question came to mind.

"Yes Tabitha; what is it?" Asked Chris dully.

"How did you get the rights to this?" Asked Tabitha.

"That's for me to know and you to look up on the Total Drama Letterz Wiki!" Smirked Chris. "…Not that there is a wiki anyway."

Chris was silent for a few seconds and kicked the stones on the ground before remembering that he was supposed to be explaining the challenge.

"Ok; the rules of today's challenge are pretty easy to understand. There are two paths up to the top of the construction site obstacle course; one of those paths will be taken by the four guys and the other will be taken by the four girls." Explained Chris. "Funny how the final eight of you has an equal gender ratio or this challenge may not have worked out so easily."

"So how do we win?" Asked Eleanor while still smiling from the baby ferrets being born.

"I'm glad you asked me that Eleanor … because it won't be easy! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "To win the challenge you will have to get past barrels, pits, unsteady platforms, balance beams and a whole lot more! Haha!"

"So … does the first person to the top win immunity?" Asked Lavender.

"Not quite albino." Smirked Chris.

"I'm not an albino!" Growled Lavender.

"Then why do you have red eyes?" Asked Chris wryly.

"It runs in the family." Explained Lavender with a glare.

"… Unfortunately for you I don't give a damn! Haha!" Laughed Chris before turning serious. "Anyway; the first guy and the first girl to the top of the obstacle course will take place in the second part of the challenge. I won't tell you what that is yet though, I wouldn't want to give you any 'unnecessary information' that you don't need to hear yet."

* * *

**Confessional: If you'll eventually need to hear it then doesn't that make it necessary?**

**Spider: I've got a bad feeling ***cough* **about this challenge. Chris **_**did**_** say it was ***cough* **dangerous.**

**Kasimar: I hope the second part of the challenge is a fight; I'd love to break that red headed cheerleader's arms! But I suppose crippling ferret girl wouldn't be so bad either.**

**Tabitha: Donkey Kong? … I guess Chris could make a challenge out of anything. Let's hope he doesn't make us go hunting for ducks; I'm not really a hunter.**

**Chris: Darn! Why didn't I think of that? Gunfire and animal deaths; great combination! Haha!**

* * *

"So; shall we get going?" Asked Nakia. "I'd like to win immunity and get this challenge over with so I can brush my hair."

"Not just yet." Smirked Chris. "Since this challenge is based on Donkey Kong; I thought that you should all … look the part."

"Are we dressing up as Mario?" Asked Eleanor.

"The guys will be; you and the others girls are going to be dressed as Princess Peach." Chuckled Chris.

"Princess Peach wasn't *cough* in Donkey Kong." Pointed out Spider. "It was Pauline; Peach first appeared in-."

"Shut up! My challenge, my rules!" Snapped Chris angrily. "If you were in charge maybe you could make the rules … but since you aren't … shut up!"

Spider gulped while Kasimar and Nakia sniggered at him.

"Ok then; report to the changing rooms from the cosplay challenge; once you're suited up in your overalls or dresses or whatever then head back here so we can get this show on the road!" Grinned Chris in sadistic anticipation.

* * *

**Confessional: Overalls go over all of it don't they?**

**Barney: On one hand overalls aren't really 'me' … on the other hand Kasimar will hate them so that's a little bit of Karma right there yaaar!**

**Lavender: The dresses were actually quite pretty … but I imagine it will be kind of hard to run in them. How does Princes Peach do it? … Yes I know it's a video game but still!**

**Eleanor: Chris was considerate enough to get me a smaller dress; that's good since I'm obviously shorter than the others. It was forest green too; that's my favorite color. I wonder why Chris did something even remotely nice. What do you think? Suspicious?**

**Chris: I'm raising their morale so it will crash down during the challenge and thus they will cry! The plan is so incredible that it's almost plausible! Hmm; that sounds like something Wallace would say.**

* * *

The four guys had changed into their Mario outfits and noticed that aside from color and size they looked relatively the same. Kasimar wasn't too pleased about having to wear an outfit like Mario's but had no choice in the matter so he put up with it.

"Somehow I don't think *cough* these would make me very *cough* popular." Mumbled Spider as he looked over himself in his red and purple outfit.

"Why don't any of our outfits have the same color scheme as Mario anyway?" Asked Jimmy in an orange and green outfit. "These just seem like shoddy knockoffs."

"It's because Chris doesn't want to get sued me hearties." Explained Barney as he glanced at himself in a mirror to get a better look at his blue and pink outfit. "I feel silly yaaar!"

"Oh shut up you whiny asshole." Grunted Kasimar in his blue and yellow get up. "Things could be a lot worse."

"I'm guessing that what you're implying *cough* involves your fists." Gulped Spider.

"You catch on fast Bug." Smirked Kasimar. "You know; it's amazing three idiots like you have made it this far in the contest."

"What do you mean 'like us' yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"Gee, I dunno." Said Kasimar sarcastically. "It might because besides me the only guys left are a retard, a weak child and a cripple."

"I'm not a *cough* cripple." Said Spider while sounding like his feelings were hurt.

"You keep telling yourself that." Said Kasimar idly. "Either way Quana isn't here to protect you now … it's just you vs. me! And I think we all know who would win in that fight."

"Yeah; I would!" Growled Barney as he leapt forwards and kicked Kasimar in the balls full force.

"Eeeeeeeeeeeek!" Squealed Kasimar as he collapsed to the floor clutching his 'babies'.

"… I think he's going to be really mad when he gets back up." Gulped Jimmy as he backed away from Kasimar.

"Don't worry me heartie; this severed fish head can take about as much pain as a glass window." Assured Barney. "Now; let's go out there are try to win this challenge and have fun!"

* * *

**Confessional: I'm going to try and beat my high score!**

**Barney: If you don't stand up to a bully he's gonna walk on you forever savvy? Kasimar is just a little person trying to make others feel as little as him. And realistically; where is he gonna end up besides prison?**

**Kasimar: **(He is holding an ice pack over hit crotch and groans in pain). **If people keep doing that I won't be able to properly knock someone up! Somehow Barney isn't scared of me … that's unusual. I guess I'll have to try and corner Bug and the blond rat when Barney is somewhere else … for my own personal safety of course.**

**Spider: Just because I'm sick doesn't ***cough* **mean I'm worthless … despite what a lot of ***big sneeze* **people say. **(Spider puts his head in his hands). **You know … I think the song 'I'm a ***cough* **believer' reflects my life pretty well … especially now that I'm ***cough* **dating Quana. **(Spider smiles to himself).

**Jimmy: Can't we all just get along? Is it really so hard to put aside our differences?**

* * *

"… Now this is the sort of outfit I deserve." Said Nakia pridefully as she looked her herself in a mirror and observed her yellow princess dress. "What really amazes me is that Chris got dresses for you three peasants as well."

"I'm not a peasant." Frowned Tabitha while wearing a royal purple colored ball dress. "Would a peasant live in a mansion?"

"If the boot fits." Said Nakia airily.

"That doesn't even make any sense." Said Tabitha before sighing. "Oh why even bother?"

"Talking to her is like trying to find the end of the rainbow." Said Eleanor in a forest green dress. "It never gets you anywhere … do you think I'd look good with bows in my hair?"

"It's not a fashion show." Reminded Lavender in a fiery red and orange dress. "But go ahead if you want to."

"Your hair is too ugly to be worthy of bow!" Snapped Nakia as she snatched away the case of bows from Eleanor. "I on the other hand am very worthy."

"You treat hair treatment as though it is a code of honor." Said Tabitha in exasperation. "If it weren't for my charitable nature I wouldn't let you bunk with me!"

"Too bad too sad." Smirked Nakia.

"You must have a lot of patience to put up with her." Said Eleanor nicely. "She really irritates me."

"I smell jealousy!" Sang Nakia annoyingly.

"How about I shave that hair off your head with a razor and leave you bald!" Threatened Lavender.

Nakia yelped in fright and tore out of the dressing room almost as quick as blinking.

"Hmm; looks like I've found Nakia's kryptonite." Smirked Lavender. "Just threaten to shave off her hair."

"Isn't that a little mean?" Asked Eleanor.

"You mean you're defending her?" Asked Lavender while sounding surprised.

"Not at all; I just don't think that I could emotionally bear the screaming." Explained Eleanor.

"Neither could I." Shuddered Tabitha. "Those horror movies Uzuri mentioned … some of them really freaked me out."

"I can't sit through a horror movie of any type." Agreed Eleanor. "Hey Lavender; do you think Barney will like your princess dress?"

"Maybe." Blushed Lavender before she frowned as she looked into the mirror. "But it brings out my bust a little bit more than I'd like."

"Chris is probably trying to generate fan service for the audience." Grumbled Tabitha. "Flippin pervert."

"Well; we can't do anything about it." Shrugged Lavender. "Let's just try and win immunity and vote Kasimar off."

"Amen to that." Smiled Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: Internet trolls are 30 year old losers in their parent's basements. Amen to that.**

**Lavender: Well; the dress may be good for a date with Barney or something … if Chris even lets me keep it.**

**Tabitha: I'm glad the dress isn't revealing; wearing revealing outfits makes me feel uncomfortable. And Nakia; if you keep your attitude up then your hair **_**will**_** end up shaved! So grow up!**

**Eleanor: Nakia seems to have a sort of multi personality. Half the time she is whiny and cowardly; the other half of the time she is an aggressive bully.**

**Nakia:** (She is brushing her hair)** I am the embodiment of wonderfulness!**

* * *

The eight campers, now changed into their plumber and princess outfits, were standing in front of the giant construction site obstacle course and were observing each others outfits.

"My, my, you look like a mermaid queen in that dress." Flirted Barney as he looked over Lavender in her fiery red and orange dress.

"Thanks." Said Lavender shyly while giving Barney a peck on the cheek. "As for your overalls … well … they look better than crocks."

"A curse on those shoes." Agreed Barney.

"Nice dress Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy at his crush. "You look really pretty."

"You really think so?" Blushed Eleanor.

"In a platonic way I do." Smiled Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Scientists have discovered a new element! Platonicium! **

**Jimmy: **(He has his head in his hands). **In retrospect I shouldn't have said platonic; that makes it seem like I'm not interested. Not that Eleanor knows anyway … boy love is more complicated than wood shop.**

**Eleanor: Was Jimmy flirting with me? … Maybe I'm just over thinking things. Still; it's nice to be called pretty. **(Eleanor giggles girlishly).

* * *

"Enough being nice to each other!" Snapped Chris. "Niceness isn't good for ratings; but hurting each other is."

"Fine by me." Shrugged Kasimar as he pushed Spider over and laughed. This action earned him a thrown rock to the head from one of the others. "Ow!"

"Ok then; will the four guys get to the starting line on the left and the four girls to the one of the right so we can get this challenge up and away!" Said Chris as he took out a megaphone and an air horn.

Jimmy, Spider, Kasimar and Barney lined up on the left and Lavender, Eleanor, Tabitha and Nakia lined up on the right; they readied themselves for the race as Chris prepared to do the countdown."

"Just to let you know … cheating is greatly encouraged." Smirked Chris with a subtle wink to Kasimar. "Remember; the first guy and girl to the top participate in the next part of the challenge."

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"Zero point five"

"Go!"

Chris sounded the air horn through the megaphone and the race began. Kasimar elbowed Jimmy over and raced forwards up a ramp and into the obstacle course with the others, even Jimmy, not too far behind.

Lavender was in the lead of the girls with Tabitha close behind as well as Eleanor with Nakia bringing up the rear.

As the eight campers ran into the obstacle course Chris laughed sadistically to himself.

"This is gonna be so awesome! I wonder if anyone will break a limb. Haha" Smirked Chris horribly.

* * *

**Confessional: Oh no! I broke a nail! Now the handyman will have to hammer a new one in!**

**Kasimar: If cheating is allowed I might just unleash my inner Donkey Kong … and throw barrels at everyone else! Yahahahahaha!**

**Spider: I'm not too good at** *cough*** gym class … so this challenge ***cough*** is probably going to be** *sneeze*** pretty hard.**

**Tabitha: I'm going to predict that Kasimar will win immunity … so how am I going to convince the others not to vote for Nakia? Reality shows really test your planning skills don't they?**

* * *

Kasimar was starting to pull away from his three male opponents; he was running up to an upward slope and also the first obstacle; an intern dressed as Donkey Kong was at the top of the slope and was rolling barrels down at Kasimar.

"Too easy!" Bragged Kasimar as he easily jumped over the barrels one by one and reached the intern.

"Eat this!" Spat Kasimar as he punched the intern and knocked him unconscious.

"Keep going me hearties!" Yelled Barney to Jimmy and Spider further down the slope.

"Time to cheat!" Cackled Kasimar evilly as he picked up a barrel and hurled it down the slope at the other three guys.

"Look out!" Gulped Spider as he ducked and covered.

"Don't worry lad; I've got it!" Assured Barney as he thrusted a hard punch at the barrel and knocked it right off the walk way. "Knock them away me hearties!"

"Aye, aye Barney!" Saluted Jimmy as he followed close behind his pirate friend.

"I need *cough* aspirins!" Whimpered Spider.

Kasimar continued throwing barrels down at his opposition but they simply sweeped the barrels aside and down below. Pretty soon they were a mere few meters away from Kasimar who looked annoyed.

"Darn! I thought that would take at least one of you out." Grumbled Kasimar irritably. "But it's still a race!"

Kasimar ran off further along the course and Barney ran after him followed by jimmy and Spider in that order.

"We can't let him get immunity!" Said Jimmy in determination.

"You seem pretty *cough* focused and determined." Noted Spider as they ran along.

"Let's just say I have some extra motivation as of today." Said Jimmy with a secretive smile.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm motivated with incentive of people confessing in me! More screen time for me!**

**Jimmy: Let's make sure that in every single possible way today is gonna be a great day … just like today!**

**Spider: Kasimar is starting to act ***cough* **like Dick Dastardly.**

**Chris:** (He has his arms crossed and is pouting very immaturely).** I wish somebody had gotten knocked out by a barrel to the head.**

* * *

Lavender was running full speed along a long walkway of the obstacle curse and was dodging heavy sandbags on ropes that were being hurled down at her as per Chris's instructions to the interns.

"Is that all you've got Chris?" Asked Lavender out loud with a smirk as she dodged another sandbag.

"I wouldn't recommend antagonizing Chris Lavender." Warned Tabitha as she ran a short distance behind Lavender with Eleanor and Lavender on her heels. "When provoked he's even worse than a rabid swarm of killer bees!"

"Can killer bees get rabies?" Asked Eleanor with a raised eyebrow.

"It's a figure of speech." Explained Tabitha.

Further along the walkway just before the stairs that led up to the next part of the obstacle course a large sandbag on a rope swung down like a pendulum and directly at the four girls.

"Whoa!" Yelped Lavender as she jumped to the side.

"Duck!" Cried Tabitha as she dropped to the ground.

"Human shield!" Said Nakia as she grabbed Eleanor and held her in front of her like a meat shield.

"Hey! Let go of me!" Yelled Eleanor as she struggled to free herself; Nakia had a stronger grip than most would have anticipated.

"But if I go that I'll get hurt and my life is worth far more than yours." Explained Nakia as the large sandbag swung ever closer at quite a speed.

"Just jump to the side!" Pleaded Eleanor as she continued to struggle.

"Thank you for your cooperation." Smirked Nakia nastily.

WHAM!

The giant sandbag whacked into Eleanor and sent both her and Nakia back a few steps; the sandbag hung in place harmlessly and Nakia smiled as she dropped Eleanor to the ground.

"Well that went well." Said Nakia with a clap of her hands.

Lavender and Tabitha were rooted to the spot in shock at what Nakia had just done. She had used a twelve year old girl as a shield when she could have simply stepped to the side! Lavender's eyes widened even more when she noticed that Eleanor was unconscious.

"You she devil!" Screamed Lavender in rage. "You better have something to say for yourself!"

"…Err … I have nice hair?" Guessed Nakia.

Lavender jumped at Nakia in an attempt to strangle her; Nakia leapt back to avoid this as two interns quickly arrived and put Eleanor onto a stretcher.

"You three continue the challenge." Said one of them. "We'll take Miss Eleanor Ollivander to the medical tent."

The two interns quickly left and the remaining three girls looked at each other.

"See? No harm done." Smirked Nakia.

Tabitha ran onwards and Lavender frowned and shoved Nakia over before following Tabitha's lead.

* * *

**Confessional: I think a lot more harm than none was done.**

**Tabitha: And I thought **_**I**_** was bad; there was no reason for Nakia to do that! Using somebody else as a shield is not something I really approve of.**

**Eleanor: That really hurt! Sometimes I wonder if Nakia is actually **_**worse**_** than Kasimar.**

* * *

The four guys had come to four balance beams which went over a large drop over to solid ground and the next part of the obstacle course. Kasimar was still in the lead and began to carefully walk across the beam; it was a drop of around twenty five and a half meters to the ground and Kasimar really did not want to fall.

"Well what have we here?" Said Kasimar to himself as he spotted something useful on the other side. It was a paintball gun. What a paintball gun has to do with Donkey Kong I do not know.

"Oh man; heights *cough* make my stomach churn." Gulped Spider as he began to slowly make his way across one of the balance beams.

"Don't look down!" Advised Jimmy as he slowly began to crawl across a different balance beam.

"It's not so bad yaaar!" Exclaimed Barney. "What's life without a bit of mortal peril me hearties? A life as boring as vanilla ice cream without the sprinkles that's what! Yohohoho!"

By the time Spider, Jimmy and Barney had made it halfway across the balance beams Kasimar had got to the other side; but rather than continue onwards to increase his lead he picked up the paintball gun and cackled evilly.

"Eat paintballs! Or better yet … eat 'pain balls'! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he readied the paintball.

"That joke was stupid." Said Jimmy flatly.

* * *

**Confessional: I on the other hand thought it was hilarious! LOL and haha and such!**

**Spider: What was a paintball gun** *cough*** even doing there anyway?**

**Chris: Truth be told … it was me who put it there; nothing raises the ratings more than somebody getting hurt or breaking a leg! Haha!**

* * *

"Don't do it *cough* Kasimar!" Pleaded Spider.

"Why not? I'd love to see you fall and break your spine." Smirked Kasimar.

"Nobody is truly evil; just*cough* look into your heart and ask yourself if this *cough* is really the right thing to do." Said Spider in an attempt to try and stop Kasimar from opening fire.

Kasimar thought for a moment and smirked nastily.

"My heart says to do it!" Sneered Kasimar.

POW! POW! POW! POW! POW! POW!

Kasimar shot a few paint balls at Spider's gut; Spider yelped in pain and lost his balance before falling off the balance beam and down below; thankfully he landed on a safety mattress that had been set up.

"Are you ok me heartie?" Asked Barney in concern.

"I'll be *cough* fine; just stop Kasimar from *cough* winning immunity!" Assured Spider from below. "I may need some *sneeze* band aids though."

"Aw dammit." Said Kasimar as he heard the sound of a metallic click as he pulled the trigger of the paintball again. "Shit! I'm out of ammo!"

Kasimar quickly ran up a ramp and began to climb a ladder; Jimmy and Barney quickly followed him though it was clear that Kasimar was a faster runner than they were.

* * *

**Confessional: Runny the Roadrunner runs away at a fast speed of running!**

**Kasimar: I'd have liked some more paintballs; that way I could have knocked all of the others over the edge and thus I could have taken my time in the challenge. Thanks for nothing whoever only gave me six paintballs.**

**Spider: That hurt a lot; at the very least Kasimar didn't aim for my eyes. That could have blinded me like my friend George back home. He was the only friend I had at school since my other friends were always at hospital.**

* * *

"At the very least we can climb ladders faster than jump man was able to." Said Lavender as she climbed up a tall ladder. "I'm glad Kasimar isn't here or he'd probably try and look up my skirt like he did in the cooking challenge."

"He's as tactless as Quagmire." Said Tabitha from a different ladder and a little further up than Lavender. "Kind of like a pervert at my school called Percy; that guy creeps me out."

"He probably has bad hair." Cringed Nakia from another ladder.

"More like he's been caught in the girls changing room sixty two times so far … in one school year." Shuddered Tabitha. "Good thing I'm not on the cheerleading squad."

"… I'm suddenly relieved I don't go to your school." Said Lavender with a look of noticeable repulsion.

"Heads up." Said Nakia as she swung to the side of her ladder. "Especially heads like mine with oh so excellently awesome hair."

Lavender and Tabitha looked up and swung to the sides as well; a fraction of a second after they did some barrels fell past them and smashed apart on the floor below.

"What the…" Said Lavender as she trailed off. "Does Chris realize that getting hit by a fast falling barrel and falling from this height could seriously damage someone?"

* * *

**Confessional: He probably doesn't because he's a complete idiot.**

**An Intern: Chris threatened to feed us interns to the sharks if we didn't obey him … and I think it's clear that Chris would follow up on his threat.**

* * *

"What does barrels falling down ladders have to do with Donkey Kong?" Whined Nakia as she continued climbing. "It just doesn't make any sense at all!"

"Have you ever played Donkey Kong?" Asked Tabitha. "That's one of the things that happened in stage one."

"And the slogan, 'How high can you get'; I wonder if anyone thought that through properly." Muttered Lavender with a slightly amused look on her face as she dodged another falling barrel.

"These barrels are hollow right?" Said Nakia with a rare look of thought on her face.

"I'm fairly certain of it." Nodded Lavender. "They look pretty light too … why?"

"Oh no reason." Smirked Nakia as she noticed another barrel falling towards her.

WHACK!

Nakia punched the barrel as hard as she could; this hurt her hand a fair bit and sent the barrel towards Lavender. Lavender quickly ducked the barrel; it flew over towards Tabitha with quite a lot of velocity and force.

SMACK!

Tabitha was hit by the barrel and instantly lost her grip and fell down below to the hard ground.

"Screw you Nakia!" Yelled Tabitha as she fell before hitting the ground and groaning in pain. "I think I pulled something…"

Lavender looked at Nakia with an expression of loathing while Nakia just giggled to herself.

"Oopsie!" Laughed Nakia as she continued climbing.

Lavender looked down at Tabitha; Lavender would have gone to help but didn't want to risk the chance of Nakia winning immunity. Lavender growled to herself as she climbed up after Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional: Do a barrel roll! *rimshot***

**Tabitha: Nakia you idiot! I know she was aiming to hit it at Lavender … but if a plan involves putting me at risk then she shouldn't do it! If it weren't for the fact she's my idiotic ally I would have her voted off … then again, if she doesn't win immunity she'll be gone tonight anyway.**

**Nakia: **(She is whining). **My hand hurts! **

**Lavender: Nakia has impressive fist strength … but did it occur to her that she could have killed Tabitha had she landed on her head … if the barrel hit me I could have died as well! Why did Chris have to say that cheating was encouraged? What a dickhead!**

**Chris:** (He is sulking).** I'm not a dickhead! I'm Stud Manly; I'm so damn manly!**

**Chef: That's his username on Facebook; I've always hated that stupid site.**

* * *

Kasimar, Jimmy and Barney had finished climbing up the tall and lean ladders; they were now faced with a new obstacle … conveyer belts.

"Ok; since when had Donkey Kong had conveyer belts?" Asked Kasimar out loud as he quickly caught his breath from climbing the tall ladder.

"It was included in the fifty meter stage in the NES version." Explained Jimmy.

"It was a rhetorical question you little #bleep# stain!" Snarled Kasimar.

"Don't use that word around Jimmy yaaar!" Growled Jimmy.

"What? You mean #bleep? It doesn't hurt anyone! #Bleep# #bleep# #bleep#! Yahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in a most highly obnoxious way.

* * *

**Confessional: My ears! They didn't need to learn that kind of language!**

**Jimmy: I don't exactly know what that word was … but it was probably the rudest three letter word I've ever heard off if Barney is to be believed.**

**Chris: Good one Kasimar! Haha! **(Chris laughs sadistically).

* * *

Before Barney could try and punch Kasimar the bully ran onto the conveyer belt and slowly towards the other side. Barney and Jimmy followed and as they did so a pit appeared in the ground behind them; it had a slippery slide leading downwards.

"Don't stop running me heartie." Advised Barney while pointing out the obvious. "If you do then you'll fall into that hole yaaar!"

"Good idea!" Agreed Jimmy.

Jimmy and Barney sped up to catch up with Kasimar; the bully had reached the other side already, but rather than continue along the course he once again stopped to try and cheat.

"Let's see how you do with shoes as oily as a criminals voice! Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he picked up an oil can and dripped the whole lot of it onto part of the conveyer belt.

"Terrible joke!" Muttered Jimmy.

"Jump me heartie!" Advised Barney.

"Aye, aye captain!" Nodded Jimmy.

Both of them jumped; Barney managed to clear the oil slick completely and made it to the other side of the conveyer belt. Jimmy however landed in the oil and slipped over forwards.

"Go on without me Barney!" Said Jimmy dramatically as the conveyer belt took him back to the hole which he fell down with a scream like what you would do on an exciting roller coaster.

"Jimmy!" Yelled Barney before he heard Kasimar laugh.

"Looks like Jimmy's gone down the drain just like Tiger Wood's popularity! Yahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as she slapped his knee in amusement.

"It's just you VS me … yaaar." Said Barney boldly.

"It's sane vs retarded." Smirked Kasimar. "…Think fast!"

Kasimar thrust out his fist and hit Barney in the gut. Kasimar laughed like Nelson from the Simpsons and ran off to the next obstacle. Barney quickly recovered and ran after his nemesis.

* * *

**Confessional: Nemesis doesn't give up.**

**Barney: So it falls to me to slay the demon of the waves yaaar? … Here I go!**

**Kasimar: Barney is probably the biggest threat out of the remaining guys other than myself … this ought to be an interesting battle of wits and fists.**

**Chris: Forget Team Edward Team Jacob, even though I love it; I'm on Team Kasimar kicking the crap out of Team Barney! Haha!**

* * *

Lavender and Nakia had come to the last obstacle on the girls side of the obstacle course; in front of them was a large gap with a ladder leading to the top of the construction site at the other side. Between them and the other side was a number of square platforms that were moving from left to right and up and down by the use of pistons and chains.

"I guess the first person to the other side gets to the next part of the challenge." Noted Lavender.

"Then it's going to be me! After all; an ugly disfigured troll shouldn't be allowed to win." Bragged Nakia with an insultive sneer.

"Your one to talk; your as mean as a troll on a message board." Retorted Lavender instantly.

Without further statements Lavender leapt onto the first platform and began to make her to across the large gap towards the other side and immunity that lay beyond it.

Nakia glanced over the edge of the gap between the platforms; where she was and where she needed to go were forty meters apart and each platform as around a meter in square radius. The pit itself was quite a large drop to a pit of beanbags quite a long distance below Nakia.

Nakia gulped as she began to slowly jump from platform to platform to try and catch up with Lavender. Lavender was nearly at the other side.

"Stop it! You're cheating!" Whined Nakia as she stomped her feet in a temper tantrum.

"How am I cheating exactly?" Asked Lavender sounding puzzled.

"Because you're winning! I want to win!" Whined Nakia immaturely.

"… Pathetic." Said Lavender flatly as she prepared to jump from her platform onto solid ground and up to the next part of the challenge.

"Oh no you don't!" Growled Nakia as she took out a tub of hair gel from within one of her pockets and threw it full force at the back of Lavender's head.

"Ow!" Yelped Lavender as she lost her balance and toppled over the edge of the platform and to the beanbags far below.

"So long sucker!" Sneered Nakia as she made it across the platforms to the other side at a leisurely pace. "I wonder who my opponent will be; maybe Spider? I'd love to crush him like the bug he is!"

Nakia began to climb the ladder to the top of the construction site obstacle course with a nasty smile on her face.

* * *

**Confessional: Bean Bag Bazooka that Veruca! **

**Lavender: That cheating little witch! I know Chris said cheating was allowed … but I could have really gotten hurt … it's only a matter of time before somebody else leaves this horrible island with an injury.**

**Nakia: Ah, hair gel; never leave home without it!**

* * *

Kasimar and Barney were neck and neck running along a long stretch of a platform; barrels were rolling down at them but they managed to jump over them or otherwise avoid them each time. A ladder to the last part of the challenge was up ahead and both teens had every intention of getting there before their enemy managed to do so.

"It's a good thing I'm a faster runner than you." Smirked Kasimar before he stumbled on a barrel and fell back a few steps behind Barney though was still on his feet.

"It's a good thing that I use my eyes yaaar!" Laughed Barney goofily.

"Shut up!" Snarled Kasimar.

"Or what?" Asked Barney.

"I'll do this!" Snapped Kasimar as he punched Barney over.

"That kinda hurt yaaar." Said Barney as he rubbed the part of his arm that Kasimar had punched.

"Good!" Sneered Kasimar as he put his right foot on Barney's chest and applied pressure. "Say uncle!"

"Auntie!"

"Say uncle!"

"Nephew!"

"#Bleep# say uncle!"

"Barrel."

"Huh?" Said Kasimar in confusion to Barney's last statement.

Exactly 1.285 seconds later Kasimar did understand what Barney meant though.

CLANG!

A barrel had been thrown from above by an intern and landed full force right on Kasimar's head. Kasimar staggered in pain and managed to groan out one word.

"…Uncle." Groaned Kasimar as he fell to the ground completely unconscious with a large bump appearing on his head.

"…Do a barrel roll!" Joked Barney while many people watching the show on their television sets let out loud groans at the incredibly lame pun.

* * *

**Confessional: If I say a joke to do with barrels I will suffer a rimshot.**

**Kasimar: If I find out which intern did that I'm going to tear out his Adams Apple!**

* * *

Barney climbed up the ladder to the top of the construction site; he wondered who his opponent would be and what the second part of the challenge would be. He just hoped he wouldn't have to go against Lavender, for obvious reasons.

Barney reached the top of the ladder and got to his feet on the very top of the construction site. He immediately noticed Chris and all of the other contestants besides Kasimar and a certain hair obsessed moron sitting on bleachers to the side of the arena with a safety wall behind them. And standing next to a ladder in the ground … was Nakia.

"And there you have it." Said Chris dramatically. "The second part of the challenge is going to be a head to head clash between Barney and Nakia!"

"… I think I can handle this." Said Barney with a fresh look of confidence on his face.

"Bring it on." Said Nakia in an arrogant tone.

"Now; can anybody guess what challenge they will have to do?" Asked Chris while awaiting guesses.

"Running on barrels?" Asked Eleanor who had a bandage on her head due to earlier.

"Imitating monkeys?" Said Tabitha in a deadpan voice.

"Sucking up to you?" Guessed Lavender flatly.

"Wrong! Though the last one would have been a very good challenge." Admitted Chris before gaining a very nasty look on his face. "No; the challenge that I have in mind for our resident pirate and hair lover … is a fight!"

The silence was deafening.

"What?" Said Lavender with a look of disgust. "You're going to make them fight for your amusement? I may not like Nakia but that isn't right."

"Too bad! My show, my rules!" Sneered Chris. "Anyway; you two just have to beat the other up until they are unable to continue fighting. Oh; and the audience is forbidden from helping out in the battle. Otherwise the helpers will be automatically eliminated. Haha!"

"This won't work yaaar." Said Barney with a serious look on his face. "I cannot, shall not and _will not_ hit a girl."

"Why not just give me immunity right away?" Asked Nakai as she admired herself in a handheld mirror. "I have no problem with fighting Barney."

"Well I can't cancel the challenge, that would be bad for ratings … and a brutal one sided fight would be awesome! So all I can say is … go!" Shouted Chris as he activated an air horn.

Nakia immediately charged at Barney and began tp punch and hit him; Barney could only block her attacks as he wasn't going to hit her despite seriously not liking her. Nakia tried to scratch Barney with her sharp red painted nails and made him yelp in pain.

"This is brutal; I can't watch." Said Jimmy as he covered his eyes.

"This just isn't right." Said Eleanor with a look of shock.

"What are you talking about? This is great!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he munched on some popcorn, toffee flavored in case you were wondering.

"Go Barney!" Cheered Lavender. "Show her who's boss!"

"I thought you didn't like this challenge?" Asked Tabitha.

"I don't; but I also don't like that Nakia is taking full advantage of the fact that Barney will not hit her." Explained Lavender. "Barney! Barney! Barney!"

Soon all the audience besides joined in cheering for Barney. Barney was touched that everyone wanted him to win but couldn't hit Nakai; his parents hadn't raised him to hit girls.

"Barney! Look *cough* out!" Warned Spider.

Barney suddenly noticed that Nakia had forced him back to the edge of the arena; behind him was a drop of a little over a hundred meters. Nakia was preparing to charge at him to finish the fight.

As Nakia charged at Barney with her claw like nails outstretched Barney dodged to the side out of reflex and Nakia didn't stop in time so she fell over the edge. Nakia grabbed onto the edge of the arena with her hands and had a look of terror in her eyes.

"Barney! Help me!" Pleaded Nakia.

"Remember; the audience cannot help any of the fighters." Smirked Chris sadistically.

"Why should I help after how horrible you've been to all me hearties yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"Because I'm sorry! I was in the wrong!" Wailed Nakia. "Look; immunity's yours! You win! Just help me! Please!"

Nakia started to loose her grip but before she could fall Barney grabbed her wrists and managed to pull her back onto solid ground. Nakia took a few deep breaths and look at Barney.

"See; saying please wasn't so hard was it?" Asked Barney.

Nakia smiled for a moment … but her smile turned into a horrible wicked sneer.

"You really are an idiot." Chuckled Nakia.

Before Barney could react Nakia kicked him in the crotch. While Barney let out a whimper of pain Nakia pushed him off the edge of the platform and Barney fell down and down and down below.

"BARNEY!" Screamed Lavender in terror.

Lavender ran from her seat to the edge of the big platform and looked down below; she could faintly see Barney below lying in a pained heap.

"Looks like immunity is mine; too easy." Said Nakia airily while admiring her hand condescendingly.

Lavender's newly tear filled eyes turned to Nakia. Lavender started to turn red in _**RAGE**_.

"You … you ungrateful bitch! You monstrous abomination! You #bleep# shit stain!" Screamed Lavender in rage. "You may have killed Barney! He saved you and that is how you repay him?"

"Pretty ironic huh?" Said Nakai without the slightest sign of remorse at all.

It took the combined strength of everyone else to hold Lavender back from murdering Nakia.

"Let's get to the ground and see if Barney's ok." Said Chris with an excited look on his face. "This is so good for ratings! Woohoo! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Complete Monster.**

**Spider: Holy … #bleep#; did Nakia ***cough*** really do that? Oh my god…**

**Lavender: Barney … please be alright.**

* * *

A short while later everyone, including the newly conscious Kasimar, was gathered by Barney who was now in the medical tent with Chef putting his left leg in a cast. Everyone besides Kasimar was glaring at Nakia with pure burning _hatred_. Nakia just looked indifferent to it all.

"Well." Began Chris. "This was certainly an interesting way to end the challenge. There as a fight, a fall and a failed flight! Haha!"

"Dude, not funny." Said Jimmy with an angry expression.

"Well; whatever. Point is; Nakia has won solo immunity for today. She has also won a special prize. Today's special prize is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A NES with the game Donkey Kong with it!"

"Not bad; the game might be more fun than the challenge." Smiled Nakia.

"So; we all know that now the time has come to vote somebody off." Said Chris with a clearly fake solemn tone.

"Well; since we sadly can't vote off Nakia, I guess Kasimar will have to do." Said Lavender with tear stained eyes.

Kasimar just snarled in response. Before anybody could say anything else Chris spoke up.

"I thought you might like to vote off Kasimar." Agreed Chris before growing a twisted smile. "But Barney here has a broken leg; I'm sorry to say that, like Raven, Barney is eliminated due to his injuries! Haha!"

"Hold no a moment!" Snarled Lavender. "You said only animal related injuries cause instant elimination; injuries from another camper don't count! Nakai was the one who did this, not an animal!"

"True … but I forgot to mention a different part of your contracts … not only do animal injuries cause instant elimination … but so does a gravity related injury. Nakai just hurt Barney because it was a challenge; gravity is why Barney has ended up like this!" Said Chris with an absolutely _horrible_ smile.

"It's true; Barney is not fit to continue in the game." Said Chef Hatchet with sincere apologeticness. "Sorry Lavender.

"Therefore Barney is hereby eliminated from Total Drama Letterz and has placed in eighth."

Lavender was silent; after a few seconds she dropped to her knees as tears began to well up in her eyes.

"What a little crybaby!" Laughed Kasimar sadistically.

"Don't say anything!" Snarled Tabitha. "Everyone; I think Lavender would appreciate some time along with Barney. Let's go."

Tabitha left the room and the others followed her; Nakia sneered at Lavender while she left.

* * *

**Confessional: Was that … Tabitha being **_**nice**_**?**

**Tabitha: There was no ulterior motive to what I did. Lavender deserves to give a proper goodbye to Barney. Nakia seriously crossed the line there; you do not backstab somebody just after they've saved you. Nakia has dug her own grave and she will lie in it soon enough.**

* * *

"Are you ok Lavender?" Asked Barney as Lavender sat on a chair beside Barney's hospital bed.

"No; I'm not. This is so unfair!" Said Lavender as she began to cry. "Nakia gets away with almost killing you and still gets to stay. You actually saved her life pretty much … and you're going."

Lavender sobbed into her hands as Barney gently rubbed her back to comfort her.

"It could be worse me love." Said Barney optimistically. "I could have broken both of my legs."

"… I'm really going to miss you Barney." Said Lavender as she tightly hugged her boyfriend. "You're a truly wonderful guy."

"I'll miss you too mermaid." Smiled Barney. "Couples sure are getting separated a lot lately; first Quana goes; now I'm gone."

"This isn't right … you deserved to win the money; I heard Chris talking with Chef about you being the most popular contestant with the fans." Sighed Lavender though she managed to smile.

"Some things are worth more than green paper." Said Barney wisely. "I think you are worth a least a million and one dollars yaaar!"

In response Lavender just hugged Barney tighter.

"I love you Barney." Whispered Lavender before grinning slyly. "Why don't I show you how much I love you?"

"Sounds good to me mermaid!" Grinned Barney genkily as he and Lavender began to kiss and make out.

* * *

**Confessional: Are mermaids good kissers? I'd say yes!**

**Barney: So this is the last time I'll be using this thing huh? Eighth out of twenty six isn't so bad. This has been a great adventure yaaar! I helped hook up a cabin boy, I found love and I got really far. All I can say is … good luck Lavender; I'm rooting for you yaaar!**

* * *

Everyone besides Kasimar and Nakia had come to see Barney off as he walked the dock of shame with crutches and a big smile on his face, possibly due to Lavender's kisses.

"See you around Barney." Waved Tabitha. "Enjoy the Playa Des losers."

"I will me heartie." Nodded Lavender.

"Goodbye Barney." Smiled Eleanor.

"It'll be different *cough* without you." Agreed Spider.

"I'm sure you'll all be fine yaaar." Grinned Barney. "And remember Spider; don't let Nakai bully you, stand up to her. To face your fears you've got to believe in yourself."

"I'll try *cough* Barney." Saluted Spider.

"Fair well Barney; I wish Nakai was leaving and not you." Said Jimmy sadly.

"Don't worry about it; only one of us can win in the end right yaaar?" Smiled Barney before he leaned down to Jimmy's ear to whisper. "And Lavender told me about your crush … good luck."

Jimmy and Barney shook hands as Barney hobbled on his crutches to the last person who was seeing him off.

"I'll miss you Lavender; kick Nakia and Kasimar straight down to Davie Jones Locker for me savvy?" Said Barney as he hugged Lavender.

"Don't worry; I will." Promised Lavender.

After a last kiss Barney boarded the Boat of Losers and was taken away from the Island while his team mates waved goodbye to him. Before long he was out of sight and Lavender let out a sad sigh.

"It'll be hard without Barney." Mumbled Lavender. "But I'm going to win this whole competition for him!"

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame while the moon was up in the sky.

"So Barney is gone and only seven campers are left in the competition. Just six more episodes and Kasimar will win! But … who will be the next person voted off? Will anyone sustain anymore injuries? Will Nakai feel remorse for what she has done? And what will Eleanor name the baby ferrets? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

Votes

N/A: Barney was eliminated due to injury.

Voted Off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana, Barney.

* * *

And sadly Barney is gone. I really didn't want to do it; but it was his time to leave. I expect at least a few people will be upset, I don't think anyone at all even disliked Barney to be honest. But you'll be seeing him again pretty soon, maybe sooner than the next episode of Total Ousted Alphabet. Let us all give a 'yaaar of respect' to Barney.

Next time: This challenge involves Mega Man, robot masters and a number of familiar faces.


	49. Day 23, Part 1, Operation Megaman

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his incredible story Total Drama Alphabet. In addition to this I do not own the challenge in this episode; it also belongs to Frank15 and is used with permission. I do however own all twenty eight OC's and I would be grateful if you didn't steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains hair related discrimination, a sinister plot, emotional moments, Mega Man weapons, a sadistic host and an alliance being formed. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Crag's Interesting Fact: **Originally when I first started planning the story Andy was going to hook up with Yessica instead of Mable. However; I personally thought Andy being with Mable would be cuter; as well as the fact Mable is more interesting than Yessica by at least a little, so I changed my mind. Bet you didn't know that!

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **Quite a quick update don't you think? I pride myself on my punctuality.

I have an important announcement that I can't believe I haven't mentioned until now. Total Drama Alphabet, the story that inspired Total Drama Letterz, has had a wiki for a while now. It was create by yours truly … and it needs help getting bigger! If you are a fan of the fanfic and want to make the wiki bigger and better then why not mosey on over to the wiki an make some edits? But only if, you know, you want to.

Mega Man or Mini Man?

* * *

The sun was up in the sky above Wawanakwa Island; less than a week was left to go in Total Drama Letterz before the champion would be crowned and the million dollars awarded. Chris Maclean stood on the Dock of Shame with a smile on his face. For some reason he was wearing a mega man helmet on his head.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The circle of life struck like it does everyday in the world as Eleanor's pet ferret rat Dandelion gave birth to three baby ferrets. Lame! I'd hurt those stupid rats if my contract forbid me from doing so … but ratings are ratings right? Jimmy also is starting to fall for Eleanor … also lame! Haha!"

"The challenge was based on the classic game Donkey Kong; a game that got Nintendo world wide fame. The objective of the challenge was to get to the top of the construction site obstacle course while trying not to die. When I say die I simply mean avoid getting knocked out or eliminated from the challenge even if a death would be great for ratings! Haha! I split the campers into gender groups; the guys went one way and the girls went the other way."

"Nakia seems to have really stepped up her game lately. Early on she actually used Eleanor as a sort of human shield, a meat shield if you will. This eliminated Eleanor from the challenge and made even Tabitha a little shocked. And that wasn't all she did! Haha!"

"With the guys I left a few items along the course to help Kasimar; such as a paintball gun and a can of slippery oil. The paintball gun eliminated Spider though sadly Kasimar ran out of paintballs. Jimmy fell victim to the oil slick on a conveyer belt and slipped over; he was promptly sent down a chute sort of hole."

"Tabitha was eliminated when Nakia accidently knocked a barrel towards her which made her fall off her ladder; Lavender was eliminated when Nakia threw a tub of hair gel at her and knocked her into a pit. Nakia was one of the two campers to be in part two of the challenge.

"Much to my dismay and loss of a fifty dollar bet to Chef; Kasimar was knocked unconscious by a barrel that some stupid intern threw at his head! I'll definitely dock that guy's pay into negative figures! Haha! Due to Kasimar being knocked out Barney was the male camper who got to the second fight of the challenge."

"It was a battle of good vs evil when Barney and Nakia had to go head to head. I made them have a hardcore fistfight! It may not have anything to do with Donkey Kong … but who the hell cares? Haha! Nakia gained the immediate upper hand because Barney won't ever hit a girl. Lame! I used to hit girls all the time in high school; I left one with a pair of broken arms! Haha!"

"Nakia nearly fell off the side of the construction site tower; Barney decided to help her after Nakia pleaded with him. But it looks like Barney made a stupid move because as soon as Nakia was on solid ground she backstabbed Barney by kicking him in the groin and knocking him off the platform. Barney fell down and broke a leg … literally! Haha! As such Nakia won immunity."

"Due to Barney breaking his leg and a clause in the camper's contracts it was Barney who walked the dock of shame … on crutches. His remaining team mates and his girlfriend were sad to see him go. He seems to be almost as beloved as the awesome me … but I'm obviously better!"

"With Barney gone we are down to seven campers; only sic more challenges and the show is over. But I bet a lot will happen before then! And now … who will be the next person voted off? Will Lavender follow her boyfriend down the dock of shame or win the competition like she vowed to. Will Nakia ever show remorse or kindness? And will this challenge really be 'mega'? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

The tension and atmosphere at Camp Wawanakwa was at an all time high. This could be understandable given that it was a crazy reality show with even crazier challenges which would naturally make people very stressed. Also it could easily owe to the result of the previous day's challenge.

Lavender was lying face down on her bed feeling very upset about her boyfriend being eliminated in a completely unfair way. Nakia should have been disqualified; any other show would have done so! But Lavender knew the bitter truth was that good didn't always win against evil every time. She could only hope that Nakia would meet her untimely downfall in the game soon enough. However; part of Lavender's mind hoped she and Nakia would be the final two so she could defeat her in the challenge and see her scream out a loud 'noooooooooo' like bad people usually did … such a cliché eh?

"I miss you Barney." Mumbled Lavender into her pillow sadly. "Why couldn't Nakia have left with a broken leg instead of you?"

* * *

**Confessional: When life gives you a hard time come and talk to me.**

**Lavender: I think of myself as a strong willed person in control of herself post of the time … but I cried a lot last night. And I think I heard Kasimar laughing in his side of the cabin. I feel like a bowl of soggy cornflakes.**

* * *

Lavender sighed to herself as she lay still and upset. After a couple of minutes of pure silence there was a knock at her door which startled her a little. She looked up and saw Spider at the door with a nervous look on his face.

"Can *cough* I come in?" Asked Spider hesitantly.

"Sure; the door is unlocked." Shrugged Lavender.

Spider opened the door and entered the cabin while closing the door behind him as he sat across from Lavender's bed.

"I see you've moved from *sneeze* the top bunk to the bottom *cough* bunk." Noted Spider.

"Yeah; I'm feeling kind of 'down' at the moment." Joked Lavender in an attempt to cheer herself up … it didn't work.

"I know how you *cough* feel." Nodded Spider comfortingly. "You're sad because your true love *cough* got voted off … I felt the same when *cough* Quana was voted off."

"She didn't leave with an injury though." Said Lavender as she buried her face back into her pillow.

"Maybe not … when *cough* she was eliminated it was completely unfair, like with Barney, but *cough* when she was eliminated I lost not only my girlfriend but *sneeze* also my biggest defender against Nakia and Kasimar. I felt at *cough an all time low."

"So what are you trying to say Spider?" Asked Lavender as she looked up.

"Barney gave me a wise bit of *cough* advice." Said Spider with a nice smile. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow *cough* is a mystery … but today is *cough* a gift, that is why they call it the *gag* present."

* * *

**Confessional: I sense a movie shout out coming on!**

**Lavender: Wasn't that a line from Kung Fu panda?**

* * *

"He really said that?" Asked Lavender with a smile. "That was so nice of him!"

"He also told me that if *cough* you focus on what you've left behind you'll never *cough* see what lies ahead." Added Spider. "Also … he'll be right here."

Spider pointed gently to Lavender's heart.

"I admit that I got that from *cough* E.T." Chuckled Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I'll be riiiiight here.**

**Spider: I may be Christian but that doesn't mean** *cough*** I didn't enjoy the movie E.T; it was a seriously** *cough*** awesome movie!**

* * *

"You know what Spider … you're right, in fact, Barney is right as well!" Said Lavender as she sat up with a new look of determination and admiration on her face. "How is moping around like a wet carrot going to help me? I'm going to avenge Barney's elimination and stick in to Nakia!"

Lavender stood up and struck a pose; if this were a cartoon and not a fanfic then the Canadian anthem would have played and the Canadian flag would have appeared behind Lavender.

"Thanks for cheering me up Spider." Said Lavender with a big smile. "Quana must be so proud of you!"

"I just did what comes *cough* natural." Said Spider with a modest smile.

"Well I appreciate that very much Spider." Said Lavender as she stretched out and headed towards the door. "By the way; has Nakia been giving you any trouble yet today?"

"Not much; well, a *cough* little." Mumbled Spider. "Earlier today she tripped me over as *cough* I was leaving my cabin and then later she threw a shoe at *cough* me."

"You've got to stand up to her sometime Spider." Said Lavender supportively. "Your fear of her gives her a thrill; it's up to you to break that thrill and show her you mean business!"

"I'll try … but standing *cough* up to a bully is easier said than done." Sighed Spider. "But you are completely *cough* right. Nakia suffers from one the worst cases of Narcissistic Personality Disorder *sneeze* that I have ever seen."

"You've noticed it too?" Said Lavender with an interested look. "You could be a doctor, ironic as it would be."

"Well dad's a doctor; but mum's an *cough* artist and I'm pretty good at drawing." Said Spider. "But I'm rambling. Let's go get some breakfast and hope today's challenge isn't as bad as the one yesterday."

"Right on." Agreed Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm right on top off the Eiffel tower! LOL funny joke!**

**Spider: Nakia is quite possibly the **_**nastiest**_** girl ***cough* **I have ever met. What did I ever do to her ***cough* **in the first place? I hope she can't hear me** *cough*** in here…**

**Lavender: I sometimes wonder about the overall privacy of these confessionals we make; how do we know somebody isn't listening from outside and hiding when we exit? Well; it's not like I say many things I don't want others to hear anyway.**

**Chef: Pretty boy has edited out some of his confessionals; one of them was him accidently revealing he still sleeps with a teddy bear! Oh; and the teddy bear is pink.**

**Chris: **(His eye is twitching and he looks somewhat deranged). **I'm going to kill chef!**

* * *

Eleanor was sitting on her bed looking at her ferrets; she couldn't help but 'awwwww' at the baby ferrets almost every time she looked at them. Jimmy was sitting next to her and was smiling due to his crush being happy.

"So what's it like being an Aunt Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy curiously.

"I'm not exactly an aunt; I'm in no way related to them besides being their owner." Giggled Eleanor.

"Same difference." Shrugged Jimmy jokily as he looked back over at the five ferrets. "So; have you decided what you are going to call the baby ferrets?"

"As a matter of fact I have." Said Eleanor as she got up and pointed to the baby ferrets in turn.

"This one is called Flash." Said Eleanor as she pointed to the snow white ferret.

"This one is called Amethyst." Said Eleanor as she pointed to a creamy yellow colored ferret.

"And this little gal is called Bitsy." Smiled Eleanor as she gestured to the last ferret; one that looked like a perfect mix of it's parents.

"Wonderful names." Applauded Jimmy. "Flash's name reminds me of cameras."

Eleanor giggled at the joke and Jimmy smiled to himself.

* * *

**Confessional: Bitsy's name reminds me of a character on Survivor Fan Characters season two and all stars.**

**Jimmy: I've noticed that half of our team is now gone; Zita, Andy, Quana and now Barney have been voted off or eliminated. I'm very glad Eleanor is still here and Spider is a good room mate … but I'm really wishing Nakia would just go away for good. Would it be wrong to call her names? I'd say not at all.**

* * *

"So … what do you think about the incident yesterday?" Asked Jimmy a little hesitantly.

"I'll tell you exactly what I think." Said Eleanor as she looked away from the five ferrets and directly at Jimmy. "How could Nakia do that? I knew she was a horrible person … but she crossed the line between normal evil and maniac evil yesterday. Barney helped her and … she just pushed him over the edge…"

Eleanor was starting to become stressed and upset.

"How could she? That was as bad as when Bambi's mother got shot!" Said Eleanor while her voice started to crack. "Lavender was so upset and Nakia just sneered at her! Nakia should have been voted off; why does she keep dodging her comeuppance? Why?"

Eleanor looked down at her shoes while feeling shaky due to her angst; if she ever need a hug it was now.

Jimmy sensed Eleanor's want for a hug and gently hugged her; Eleanor smiled and hugged back.

"Thanks Jimmy." Whispered Eleanor before sighing sadly. "It's just that Nakia is such a horrible person; Kasimar is too … but the fact they have gotten so far and not received a karmic punishment really upsets me."

"I understand how you feel; but sometimes horrible people stick around for a while so that their comeuppance is all the more humiliating and well deserved. Kind of like with Umbridge." Explained Jimmy compassionately.

"… You have a point; but I'd prefer those two horrible people to go sooner rather than later. It's only a matter of time before they target me! Nakia has me as number two on her hit list as it is…" Sniffled Eleanor.

"That's not the Eleanor I know." Said Jimmy as he began to make a pep talk. "The Eleanor River Ollivander I know would never get upset! She'd have her head held high and solider on through the thick and thin because she is the type of person who would never give up, a person with a strong will and a big heart. And I know her big heart will win the day."

"… You are a really wonderful kid Jimmy." Said Eleanor in a touched voice. "You're always there for me and anyone who feels upset."

"It's what I do." Chuckled Jimmy.

"Well I'm glad you do it." Smiled Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm glad that you all confess in me!**

**Eleanor: I wonder if Jimmy lives near me. It would be nice to hang out with him after the show and just play video games and play outside. I live near a forest so there's no shortage of trees to climb; I could even show him my secret stash of chocolate. **(Eleanor realizes what she just said and chuckles nervously). **Which isn't a secret anymore I suppose…**

**Jimmy: I wonder what Eleanor's favorite type of jelly bean is. I quite like the black ones and the green ones as well.**

* * *

"You know Eleanor; I've just had an idea." Said Jimmy as a thought seemed to have occurred to him. "How about we form an alliance?"

"You think it'd be a good idea?" Asked Eleanor. "We all saw how Heather's alliance went last season."

"True … but we are friends with each other; I promise to treat you fairly. All we'd really do is vote for the same person and look out for each other." Promised Jimmy in pure honesty. "So; what do you say?"

"As long as the first person we vote off is Nakia I'm all for it!" Said Eleanor as she and Jimmy sealed the deal by shaking hands.

"Then it's settled; from this moment onwards this duo alliance shall be called … The Preteen Scamps!" Announced Jimmy though he kept his voice down so nobody else could hear them.

"That's a good name." Giggled Eleanor as she blew a blond and green bang of hair out of her face.

* * *

**Confessional: Achievement unlocked! A tween alliance is formed!**

**Eleanor: With only seven of us left in the game it's probably a good idea for form alliances to avoid getting voted off. But I wonder what will happen if me and Jimmy are the final two ... I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it, if it happens at all.**

**Jimmy: On one hand the alliance is a good idea to make sure me and Eleanor stay in the game, a very good idea. On the other and it is also good because it'll give me a possible chance to get closer to Eleanor. I'm suddenly in a very good mood; very good indeed!**

* * *

Tabitha, Kasimar and Nakia were meeting up again in the forest. Tabitha looked angry while Kasimar and Nakia looked fairly indifferent.

"You shouldn't have done that to Barney Nakia." Scowled Tabitha. "Because of that little _stunt_ you are now a prime candidate for elimination over Kasimar! Seriously; I'm wondering why I even let you into this alliance; you're a wicked and nasty person!"

"So are you." Replied Nakia swiftly as she took out her trusty hairbrush. "But it got me immunity and spared Kasimar didn't it?"

"That's beside the point! You could have _killed_ Barney due to the height of his fall!" Growled Tabitha. "I may seriously dislike him along with most of the people here … but I most certainly do not want him dead."

"I couldn't care less either way." Said Kasimar as he relaxed with his hands in his pockets. "Think of it this way Tabby; you've been rid of a big threat and the other big threat, Lavender, is suffering from a big heart ache, I heard her crying last night! You should have an easy time avoiding elimination in the coming days."

"First of all, do _not_ call me Tabby." Frowned Tabitha. "It's really irritating."

"That's exactly why I did it." Smirked Kasimar.

"Second of all; you may be right … but I still think what Nakia did went too far." Said Tabitha with a look of thought. "But I guess … you can't change the past."

* * *

**Confessional: Half past ten is when it will start raining men!**

**Kasimar: This is great; Nakia has moved the elimination target off me and over to her, and she's increased the bull's eye to ten times its normal size. This is overall a good thing; if neither of us wins immunity then I'll probably get the final marshmallow at the ceremony. And quite frankly Barney's plight amused me; so what if a few people get hurt? That's just life.**

* * *

"I say we go after Spider next." Said Nakia with disdain in her voice. "He's an awful smear on society and with his girlfriend and his best friend gone he's going to be at an all time low. He'll be easy pickings; like an apple from a tree!"

"While that idea is very plausible." Began Tabitha. "I think we should go for Lavender; our remaining opposition is a sick guy, two kids and a cheerleader who is also smart. Lavender is far and away the biggest threat so I think we should go for her. I might be able to convince Jimmy to change his vote depending on how things go. I make no promises but you should both scrape by if you don't do anything stupid."

"Blah, blah, blah." Said Kasimar in a slow, deadpan and sarcastic voice. "Why can't I just beat the crap out of somebody?"

"Is that all you think about? Hurting people?" Asked Tabitha in disgust. "I don't want you hurting anyone else; not yet anyway, it can wait a while. To be honest, besides your homicidal and monstrous attitude I think you're kind of boring."

Kasimar's response is something we cannot put in a T rated Fanfic so here is a happy smiley face instead. ':)'

* * *

**Confessional: Oh my gosh! What a colorful selection of words he has…**

**Tabitha: **(She looks a little wide eyed). **Whoa … I hope Chris edits that out. Some of that rant made my blood go cold…**

**Nakia: **(She doesn't look phased at all). **I love my hair!**

* * *

"What's the matter Tabitha? _Cat_ got your tongue? Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in the way most nasty bullies usually do; like the ones who wedgie people up the school flagpole and make nerds run out of underwear.

"Just … be quiet." Said Tabitha in an exasperated tone. "Look; just try to win immunity in the challenge today and we'll base our next move on the result of it. Meeting adjourned."

Tabitha left back to camp as it was about the timer a challenge was usually announced. Kasimar and Nakia exchanged glances.

"I say we team up against her in the final three." Said Kasimar with a devious sneer.

"I'm game." Smirked Nakia.

"… Want a cigarette?" Asked Kasimar.

"Eww no! They cause so many heads of hair to get split ends!" Cringed Nakia.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't see how that sentence made sense in all sensibleness.**

**Tabitha: I could really do with a vacation…**

**Kasimar: If it was me and Nakia in the final two I could easily beat her. Tabitha would be harder … but Chris allows cheating so I could pull off a win against anyone.**

* * *

A short while later Chris had gathered the seven remaining campers in the center of camp. He was dressed like Mega Man and a large box was next to him. A number of the campers couldn't help but raise eyebrows at what Chris was wearing.

"Hey losers; ready for your next challenge?" Asked Chris with a casual look on his face.

"Why are you dressed as Mega Man?" Asked Lavender. "You look stupid … well, stupider than usual!"

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "I'm better than everyone!"

"Even Chuck Norris?" Asked Jimmy doubtfully. "Nobody can beat him."

"I can! I could easily kick the ass of that retarded Kung Fu has-been." Bragged Chris.

"Ahem." Said a voice behind Chris while all seven of the campers went wide eyed.

Chris turned and was immediately met with a round house kick to the balls which made him scream like a newborn baby. The owner of the foot that kicked Chris was none other than Chuck Norris.

"Nobody can beat me; that's the law of the universe." Said Chuck Norris calmly.

The campers looked at Chuck Norris for a moment, then they looked down at Chris, then they looked up towards Chuck Norris again … but he was gone, he had somehow vanished into thin air.

"Ok … what the hell?" Said Eleanor looking really confused indeed.

* * *

**Confessional: You simply cannot beat Chuck Norris! Saying otherwise is blasphemy!**

**Tabitha: Ok; how in the heck did Chuck Norris appear behind Chris out of nowhere? It's not physically possible!**

**Kasimar: Phfft! I could make Chuck Norris run crying home to his mommy. **(The toilet shoots out water and sends Kasimar upwards where he bashes his head on the ceiling). **Ow**!

**Lavender:** (She blinks and then shrugs)** … Stranger things have happened on this island I guess.**

* * *

After a couple of minutes Chris recovered from his groinal blow from Chuck Norris himself. After dusting himself off Chris resumed speaking as though nothing had happened.

"You may be wondering why I am dressed as Mega Man." Said Chris as he gestured to his outfit. "Anyone who doesn't know why is a complete idiot! Isn't it obvious that today's challenge is based on Mega Man?"

"Cool! Another video game challenge." Cheered Jimmy.

"Mega Man sucks." Scoffed Kasimar. "Silent Hill is much better."

"Those games freak me out." Muttered Tabitha.

"Aaaaaanyway." Said Chris to get the attention back onto himself. "For today's challenge you are going to be seeing some familiar faces … that's right; every camper who has been voted off up until now is going to be helping out in the challenge."

* * *

**Confessional: Yay! The brigade is all together again!**

**Tabitha: … Aw crap.**

**Spider: **(He looks excited). **If every camper is here … that means Quana is here as well! It may have only been two days … but I really miss her.**

**Lavender: Barney's back in town! I think I'm going to enjoy this challenge! Yeehaw!**

* * *

"The objective of today's challenge is to defeat robot masters. The nineteen eliminated campers are going to be dressed up as robot masters in the forest; you have to track them down and defeat them. Whoever defeats the most robot masters will win immunity and be safe from votes at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony." Explained Chris.

"Awesome!" Smirked Kasimar. "Time to exercise my fists in their faces; I'd like to cripple Gary again!"

"Sadly Kasimar … you can't do that." Said Chris apologetically. "For today's challenge you will all be using one of the weapons from the Mega Man series. And that brings me along to the box next to me."

Chris took seven smaller boxes out of the bigger box while some interns gave each camper a sort of life meter attached to a belt that had their name on it.

"Those are your life meters." Explained Chris before adding. "Not that any of you have a life! Haha! Anyway; each time you are hit you will lose a single bar of energy. If you are hit twenty seven times than you will be eliminated from the challenge. If you are eliminated then you will not win _even_ if you had defeated the most robot masters … so be careful!"

"So I'm guessing that *cough* the weapons are in those boxes." Guessed Spider.

"Correct you are Spider; everyone gets a box and you can use the weapon inside … and only the weapon inside." Informed Chris. "The nameless interns will give you your boxes and the card inside will tell you what weapon you each have. I'd prefer not to let you know but my contract sadly says I have to. Oh; and if one contestant helps another than the helper is disqualified! Haha!"

The interns handed each of the campers a single box. The sound of box opening was heard as everyone discovered what weapons they had.

"I've got the thunder beam." Said Spider as he looked at his three tendrilled flail which seemed to be buzzing with a little bit of electricity.

"Hyper bombs, hmm." Said Tabitha as she saw a large amount of bombs in her box; about a little over a hundred.

"Ice slasher for me." Said Jimmy as he took out a gun from his box that resembled an ice lolly.

"I've got the air shooter … lame!" Whined Nakia as she put on two wrists bracers that had a sort of hologram emitter on each of them.

"I got the metal blades; maybe I could cut someone." Said Kasimar as he looked at the box of blades he had which he quickly realized where plastic. "Dammit!"

"Magnet missile?" Said Eleanor as she looked at her magnet shaped gun.

"Hmm; looks like I've got the shadow blades." Said Lavender as she saw a large amount of plastic blades in her box which were in a very different shape to the ones Kasimar had.

"Well then." Said Chris with a clap of his hands. "You know the challenge, you have your weapons and life meters … and the Robot Masters are awaiting you in the forest … so … go!"

The campers took off into the forest and most went in different directions. Tabitha stayed behind and walked up to Chris.

"I've got to ask; … are the eliminated campers going to be blabbing my game plan?" Asked Tabitha with an irritable look on her face.

"No they are not." Said Chris with a chuckle to himself. "It's against there contract; if they say anything I can sue them for thousands of dollars due to a breach of contract! Haha!"

"Ok; just checking." Said Tabitha as she sped off into the forest to start the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: Checkmate! Get it? Because she said checking … oh never mind.**

**Tabitha: That's a relief; I was quite worried for a moment. I feel safe regardless of if I win or lose … but I predict some of the ex campers won't be happy…**

**Fifi: **(She is dressed in a Florissant pink and neon yellow outfit). **Chris is the type of guy I hate; he's what feminists stand up against. As for the challenge; I think this will be pretty fun, all fear Pink Man! **(Fifi giggles to herself).

**Wallace:** (He is dressed in a black and blue version of his normal outfit with a helmet that has the word 'evil' on it).** This challenge is going to be so evil! I will drain someone's life bar and then they will lose and **_**cry**_**! Mwahahahahahahahahahahaha! All hail the very evilest guy ever … Evil Man!**

**Raven: **(She is dressed in a green outfit with a spiky helmet). **I'm Cactus Man … I feel so silly! Well; at least Gary called me cute. **(Raven blushes). **It's so nice to have somebody special who really cares about you.**

**Carlton: **(He is dressed in a cloud patterned outfit with a black lightning cloud on his helmet). **I don't even want to be here! I know what weapons the remaining seven still in the game have … this is too scary! I don't wanna get hurt!**

* * *

Nakia was running through the forest looking for a robot master; she passed a large tree and suddenly an arm reached out and grabbed her.

"Nakia; we need to talk." Said Kasimar; he had a seriously twisted look on his face.

"About what?" Asked Nakia as Kasimar let her go. "My hair?"

"No stupid! I mean about eliminating the competition!" Snapped Kasimar impatiently. "You want Bug gone right?"

"Of course I do! He's a nasty little puny _wor_m!" Scowled Nakia.

"Well I know how you can get rid of him." Said Kasimar with a grin. "Forget what Tabitha says; listen to me this time, I know ALL about revenge … and there is no better way of getting revenge than crippling someone."

Kasimar reached behind him and took out a steel pipe and passed it to Nakia.

"Here's the plan; you beat any robot masters you find, but if you see Spider attack him with this pipe. Don't listen to him if he cries for mercy, keep attacking him." Said Kasimar in a pure evil tone. "He should permanently lose the ability to walk and I reckon he will be eliminated by default. So … you up for breaking Spider's legs?"

Nakia was silent for a moment as she looked at the pipe in her hands; she suddenly narrowed her eyes and nodded.

"Don't worry Kasimar; I've been waiting for an opportunity like this for _too_ long to pass it up!" Said Nakia as she finished by speaking one last sentence. "I. Will. Cripple. Him. I'm going to really _enjoy_ this."

* * *

Whoa! Kasimar has hatched a very nasty plot and has given Nakia a REAL weapon! What is going to happen now? You'll find out in the next chapter! Chapter 50 will hopefully be quite long; each of the twenty six campers will be appearing!

See you next time everyone! Don't forget to review!


	50. Day 23, Part 2, The Robot Masters

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or The Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his incredible story Total Drama Alphabet. In addition to this I do not own the challenge in this episode; it also belongs to Frank15 and is used with permission. I do however own all twenty eight OC's and I would be grateful if you didn't steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains made up robot Masters, something awesome, broken sunglasses, some revelations, a sadistic host, a nasty bully and a guy in a wheelchair. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings:** SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria

**Note: **I have an important announcement! My good friend Reading10 has created a wiki for Total Drama Letterz. If you want to help out in building it up; or maybe learn more about your favorite characters then why not head on over and take a look around?

P.S the Chuck Norris cameo in the previous chapter was suggested by CoolKid13.

You Cannot Beat Air Man!

* * *

"Welcome back to Total Drama Letterz." Said Chris dramatically while making grand gestures with his arms. "If you are just joining us then you have missed only a few things. People cried and the Mega Man challenge was announced. Now the seven remaining campers are going to try and find Robot Masters in the forest and defeat them. Whoever defeats the most will win immunity. Oh; and did I mention that the Robot Masters will be our nineteen ex campers?"

"You mentioned it before the commercial break!" Called Chef Hatchet from the kitchen.

"I'm aware of that! Get back to cooking the daily crap!" Screamed Chris angrily before grumbling to himself. "You can't hire good help for little pay these days can you?"

"I wouldn't know." Said the intern holding the camera.

"It was a rhetorical question you stupid stained shit ticket!" Whined Chris in annoyance. "Well; seven campers are left in the game; by the end of the rest of the episode it will be a mere six. So just watch the episode so I get paid ok?"

"Speaking of which ...where the hell is my paycheck?" Roared Chef Hatchet from the Kitchen.

* * *

**Confessional: I think I know…**

**Chris: Don't tell Chef Hatchet … but I flushed his paycheck down the toilet when I got bored. So … yeah.**

(The door to the confessional is slammed open and Chef Hatchet is standing there looking _pissed_. Chris screams as Chef lunges for him and began to strangle him like Homer does to Bart).

**Chef: That's it! I'm putting rat poison in his burritos!**

* * *

Jimmy was walking through the forest looking at his lolly pop shaped gun while keeping an eye out for Robot Masters.

"It's just too bad I was never very good at Mega Man." Chuckled Jimmy to himself. "It's also too bad that I can't put in a cheat code in real life; cheating isn't my style really."

Jimmy heard the sound of a snapping twig and spun round to the source of the noise with his gun aiming and at the ready. There was nothing there.

"Come on out! Your cover is blown like a kite!" Called Jimmy.

The sound of an irritated sigh was heard and Hector stepped out from behind a tree. He was wearing a metallic chrome colored outfit with a lot of numbers from one to nine on it. He also had a hat shaped like a zero.

"All Quake in fear on Number Man!" Said Hector while looking embarrassed because of the outfit he was wearing. "Look out Zero because I'm going to subtract your head from your shoulders! … Man; Chris really thought of some lame number jokes."

"I thought it was pretty funny." Smirked Jimmy. "So … you're Hector right?"

"That's me." Nodded Hector.

"I didn't get to talk to you that much so I didn't remember." Said Jimmy as he raised his weapon again. "So … let's dual!"

Jimmy fired his weapon and a holographic blast of ice shot at Hector before he could equip his weapon. Hector took out two plastic boomerangs; each was shaped like the number three. Hector threw his 'numberangs' but Jimmy ducked and they sailed over him.

"Why couldn't I have been given the metal blades?" Asked Hector out loud. "They are clearly the best weapon in the game; but Chris is such an imbecile he have me a shoddy knockoff weapon."

At that moment the two boomerangs flew back and hit Hector which drained his life to single bar. Jimmy raised his gun and before firing said a one liner.

"Sorry seven; but I have to beat you because seven eight nine!" Jimmy laughed merrily as he fired his weapon and defeated Hector.

"Looks like I'm out." Sighed Hector. "I was hoping to commence battle with a few certain individuals … but it'll do I guess. Good job Jimmy."

Hector held out his hand for a shake; Jimmy accepted it but received a tiny jolt of electricity.

"I believe I forgot to mention touching a robot master lowers your health." Smirked Hector mildly as he released his hand from the shake.

"You got me." Acknowledged Jimmy. "Well; gotta go, I haven't got a game over just yet!"

Jimmy ran off deeper into the forest while Hector sat down against a tree and took out his Sudoku book.

"Well; looks like I've got a bit of inactive free time to myself." Said Hector as he relaxed now that he was gone from the challenge.

* * *

**Confessional: So Mr. Doko, what do you want to do?**

**Jimmy: Hector got me with the oldest trick in the book, right no page one! I've got to give him props for that.**

**Hector: I may like Maths … but number jokes are just plain moronically uncomedic.**

**Chris: Shut up! I worked very hard on that speech!**

**Chef: For about thirty seconds to be exact.**

* * *

Kasimar was leisurely strolling through the forest. He was looking forward to seeing the result of his little plan from earlier. He was also keeping an eye out for robot masters as he wanted to win immunity; though he felt confident he'd be safe … unless of course Nakia managed to win immunity.

"Man this challenge is stupid! Why couldn't the challenge have been from a good video game series … like Gears of War?"£ Asked Kasimar out loud. "Chainsaw violence is always cool."

"Halt fiend! I am the spiky cactus man!" Said a voice that was almost brave sounding.

Kasimar turned and saw Raven standing a short distance away. She was dressed in a pale green outfit with a spiky helmet. She also had shoulder pads with spikes on them as well as dark green gloves. The spikes were plastic but Kasimar didn't know that. What was noticeable was that Raven's leg was no longer in a cast and she looked like she had made a full recovery from the bear attack.

"Ok look; it's the lame shy black girl." Said Kasimar dryly. "What are you gonna do? Stutter me to death?"

"Not quite … but don't tempt me!" Glared Raven as she took out a number of small cactuses. "Eat this … because Cacti are edible in some parts of the world!"

Raven began throwing cacti as Kasimar and started to chip away at his life bar. Kasimar leapt out of the way after the third hit looking annoyed.

"Stop doing that." Grunted Kasimar.

Raven responded by lobbing another cactus at Kasimar.

"Ok; you're starting to piss me off!" Growled Kasimar as he took out his metal blades and began to throw them rapidly.

Raven tried to fight back but before long her life bar of ten units was gone; she had lowered Kasimar from twenty seven bars to twenty three instead.

"Darn it." Mumbled Raven.

"You're not getting rid off me that easily. " Smirked Kasimar. "Oh; and word of advice from strong to weak. Break it off with that faggot chef."

"Hey! You can't say things like that on TV!" Said Raven in shock at the offensive word Kasimar had used. "And I love Gary; why should I listen to you?"

"To put it simply … interracial relationships don't work; you're brining shame to the world." Smirked Kasimar as he strolled by Raven; though he stropped to shove her over. "Later wuss; try not to be the bears punching bag again you cripple!"

Kasimar left with a laugh. Raven felt more than a little upset about what he had said as she got back to her feet.

* * *

**Confessional: Cacti are not very good to use as chairs.**

**Kasimar: Isn't the sight of somebody feeling sad a true work of art?**

**Gary and Raven: **(Gary is sitting in his wheelchair and Raven is sitting on his lap).

**Raven:** (She looks upset).** He said it was wrong we were dating because we are different races; he also called me a cripple.  
****Gary: **(He gently rubs Raven's back). **Don't listen to him Ravy; what matters is that we love each other. We're a checkerboard couple and I like it that way.  
****Raven: Thanks Gary; you're always there for me.  
****Gary: Isn't any good boyfriend always there for his girlfriend?  
****Raven: True … and Kasimar also pushed me over.  
****Gary: I'll certainly give him heck if I see him. I'll beat him like an egg!  
****Raven:** (She giggles).** Your threats are funny. **(Raven gives Gary kiss)

* * *

Tabitha was keeping a close watch for anyone else; she knew that the ex campers would definitely harbor some ire for her after what she had done. Tabitha didn't have to wait long before somebody jumped out at her.

"All bow down to the mighty Pink Man!" Said Fifi with an angry look on her face. "I'd have personally liked it to be Pink Women myself."

"Oh look; it's the pink sexist." Said Tabitha irritably.

"I'm not like that anymore." Growled Fifi. "Besides; you've done far worse than me."

"I did what I had to do." Stated Tabitha boldly as she tossed a bomb at Fifi which took off a fair chunk of her life meter.

"Hey! How did your weapon take off a quarter of my health in one go?" Asked Fifi in surprise.

"I guess some weapons are stronger than others." Shrugged Tabitha as she quickly tossed another three bombs at Fifi. They only made small crackles and didn't really hurt at all.

"Aw crap." Muttered Fifi before glaring at Tabitha. "It's a shame you had to be the last member of our team; you're a disgrace! You are really lucky that Chris said the ex contestants can't tell the remaining seven anything."

"I haven't exactly broken the rules." Pointed out Tabitha. "And I may be not nice; but I'm a step above Nakia and Kasimar."

"You should have seen how Uzuri cried when she saw episode reruns; it was awful!" Spat Fifi angrily. "Just you wait."

Fifi left the area and Tabitha blinked once and then twice.

"It was nothing personal." Muttered Tabitha. "Like I had a choice; though it was kinda fun."

* * *

**Confessional: Fun should be when you win at a party game!**

**Tabitha: I wonder if I'll come across Uzuri today … that would not be pretty. But hey; they can't say anything due to contract. And since only one person can win immunity I'm in no danger either way.**

**Fifi: Maybe it was for the best I was voted off really early in the contest … I hardly had to be around that bitch.**

* * *

Spider took a breath with his inhaler as he leaned against a tree for a moment. The island air was nice and fresh; his Doctor had said that the fresh island air would be good for him.

"I wonder who I'm *cough* going to have to battle." Pondered Spider out loud to himself. "I'd like to see Quana again; I *cough* really love that girl."

"That's so cute." Giggled a slightly girly female voice from behind a tree.

"Who's there?" Asked Spider nervously as he readied his thunder beam flail.

"Only me." Said Yessica as she revealed herself from behind the tall tree she had been using as cover.

Yessica was dressed in an outfit with a lot of hands on it that was colored yellow. She also had a large Styrofoam hand over her right hand, like the ones at baseball games.

"When I said I wanted to be wave man this wasn't _quiiiite_ what I had in mind." Said yessica as she looked down at her outfit. "But here I am all the same! Mega Man was also my favorite game! … Speaking in rhyme is fun."

"I guess we have to *cough* do battle." Said Spider hesitantly. "I don't want anyone to get hurt though."

"Don't worry; our robot master costumes are designed to absorb any blows we make take during the challenge." Assured Yessica. "I'll let you have the first strike if you want."

"Sure." Smiled spider as he gently hit Yessica with his flail. Instantly the life bar box Yessica had made a 'you're dead' sort of sound.

"Huh? How could I be out so quickly?" Asked Yessica in confusion. "I had fifteen units of life."

"Hmm … maybe it's because you are *cough* Wave Man, waves are made of water, and water doesn't mix with electricity." Theorized Spider.

"Oh; that makes sense." Agreed Yessica. "Well; see ya later Spider! Oh; and good job on hooking up with Quana; me and Irene made monetary bets on whether it would happen before the merge or after … you helped me win ten bucks!"

Yessica skipped off and jumped into the river and began swimming downstream while Spider walked to the edge of the river.

"I'm glad I could *cough* help!" Called Spider to Yessica.

* * *

**Confessional: I'm not old enough to gamble yet since I was only built last year.**

**Spider: I can only hope the ***cough* **other so called 'robot masters' will be ***cough* **just as easy to beat. **

**Yessica: I sometimes wonder if bathing in rivers and the ocean works as well as a bath … what do you guys and gals think?**

* * *

Lavender could hear somebody following her; she was letting whoever it was think that she wasn't aware of them. After a few moments of walking along she heard the sound of somebody pealing so quickly cart wheeled out of the way. When she looked up she saw Daisy standing there looking very irritable.

Daisy was dressed in a golden outfit with a pink D on it. Her normal pink high heels were replaced with shiny golden boots.

"All bow to Best Man; the best person in the world." Bragged Daisy as she took out a golden trident.

"I wouldn't say you are the best/" Said Lavender as she got to her feet and took out her Shadow Blades. "Probably not even in the top half."

"I will sue you for defamation if you don't start bowing down to me!" Screamed Daisy in rage.

"You sound exactly like Leanne Grump from my school." Yawned Lavender. "Respect is _earned_, not given … and why is there some blue jelly in your hair?"

"Shut up!" Snarled Daisy while turning red with anger. "Don't make me attack you! I'm the best fighter in the world!"

"Look; just calm down." Reasoned Lavender. "Nobody is best at everything."

"You wouldn't know what it's like to be even a tiny bit perfect! You're a hideous shit stain!" Screamed Daisy. "And a crybaby too."

"I'm no crybaby." Said Lavender coolly.

"Oh please; you cried last night after your freak of a boyfriend got eliminated. Serves you right for voting me off! Karma at best!" Bragged Daisy.

Lavender growled in anger at what Daisy had said; she threw three shadow blades at Daisy in one go. As Daisy stumbled Lavender pounced and began a cat fight; a fight she _immediately_ gained the upper hand in.

"Ow! Help! I'll sue! Momma!" Wailed Daisy as Lavender punched and kicked her.

* * *

**Confessional: Leanne was such a Yosemite Samantha!**

**Daisy: **(She has a patch of her hair missing). **I am so getting that red headed terrorist expelled from her school! She's a menace to decent people like me!**

**Lavender: Making fun of my boyfriend's injury and saying I deserved it to happen is a surefire way to get on my bad side for life. I think I depleted her life meter during the fight as well.**

**Chris: That was excellent TV! I can taste the ratings already!**

* * *

Eleanor skipped along humming a tune to herself; she hadn't come across any robot masters yet but she felt that she would be safe regardless of is she won or not. Being out in the woods with nature and animals felt really nice.

"Come out robot masters." Chirped Eleanor cheerfully.

Eleanor got her wish.

"Behold the power that is Rock Man." Said Oscar from his perch on top of a large rock. "I will rock you more than a boulder! … I admit that joke was stupid; blame Chris, he made it up."

"I'd expect that from Jimmy." Said Eleanor as she raised her magnet shaped gun. "How are you doing Oscar?"

"I'm doing pretty good; well, it could be better." Said Oscar with a small frown.

"Are you having problems with Xaria?" Asked Eleanor hesitantly.

"Oh no, not at all." Assured Oscar. "I'm not allowed to tell you anyway. Now … let the battle commence!"

Oscar stomped the ground with his right foot twice which caused a pair of holographic shockwaves to appear and shoot towards Eleanor. Eleanor jumped over the first but the second one caught her and made her lose three bars on her life meter.

"I hope you have a strong stomach because you're about to eat magnet!" Said Eleanor with a 'tough face' which was more comical than intimidating.

Eleanor fired her gun which blasted a spray of small holographic magnets at Oscar like a shotgun. It was a direct hit and Oscar lost some of his life. Oscar returned fire with two more shockwaves but Eleanor leapt over them and blasted another magnet burst at Oscar. Because Eleanor was closer she did more damage than last time.

"Time for my special attack." Said Oscar as he parted his hands. "Fire clap!"

Oscar clapped his hands together and a holographic ball of fire shot at Eleanor and scored a direct hit. Eleanor quickly blasted Oscar three times in rapid succession and his life bar made the 'you're dead' sound which signaled that Oscar had been beaten.

"Looks like you beat me." Said Oscar with a thumbs up. "Not bad Eleanor."

"Thanks Oscar." Smile Eleanor cheerfully. "Now if you'll excuse me I need to look for more robot masters."

"It's not like you're going to be voted off anyway." Pointed out Oscar.

"True; but bigger surprises have happened; like when Quana got voted off." Reminded Eleanor. "I don't want to take the chance."

"Good idea; it shocks me that Chris did nothing about that." Said Oscar as he folded his arms. "His bias shouldn't be allowed."

"Absolutely; I hope he gets fired." Agreed Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: Fire comes from flame throwers!**

**Eleanor: If Chris were an animal he would be the Big Bad Wolf. Then again he could also be a grub since he's about as good as one … as in not at all.**

**Oscar: I was kind of hoping I would battle Kasimar. It'd be a battle as old as time, evil and wicked vs good and kind.**

(The confessional door opens and Chris stands there with a frown on his face).

**Chris: Get out! Only contestants can use the confessional!**

* * *

Nakia was walking along holding the steel pipe that Kasimar had given her and was not only looking for Robot Masters but also for Spider as well. She really wanted to give that 'rat' what she, and only she, felt he truly deserved for all he had 'done' to her.

"Where is that bad haired bastard?" Grumbled Nakia. "I hate being in the forest! It's so tacky!"

Nakia suddenly heard a whimpering sound from nearby. She hid the pipe under her shirt and followed the noise; in a very short while (a total of twenty paces) she saw Carlton shivering against a tree.

"Why did I have to be in the woods?" Whimpered Carlton. "I'm scared of the woods! That and … squirrels!"

"So; what robot master are you supposed to be?" Asked Nakia in a bored tone.

"I'm cloud man." Mumbled Carlton before realizing who he was talking to. "AAAAAAAARGH! It's you! Don't hurt me!"

"You're pathetic." Sneered Nakia.

"Maybe so … but I'll defeat myself if you leave me alone." Offered Carlton while shaking like a leaf.

"Deal." Said Nakia simply.

Carlton took some plastic lightning bolts from a satchel attached to his outfit and quickly pelted himself with them. In seconds the 'you're dead' noise sounded.

"Bye!" Squeaked Carlton in terror as he ran away from Nakia at full speed; possibly faster than the road runner.

"… That was easy." Said Nakia contently. "Now; where could Spider be?"

* * *

**Confessional: In a spider web?**

**Carlton: It's a good thing I'm a fast runner. It comes with running away all the time.**

**Nakia: Carlton is pathetic; quite unlike me!**

**Wallace: I've **_**seriously**_** got to toughen Carlton up. He could be a great villain! Hmm; Chris wanted me to help in a challenge in the near future … I could knock Carlton out and bring him with me! Mwahahahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Jimmy was in a pretty good mood; he had managed to beat a robot master already. He was hoping that he could beat more of the Robot Masters before the challenge was over. Maybe the prize would involve video games … or at least be something half decent.

"Food … food … food." Groaned a hungry and very dopey sounding voice from nearby.

"Hello? Is anyone there?" Asked Jimmy as he took out his ice slasher.

"Sooooooooo hungry." Groaned Patch as he walked out from behind a rock.

"Err…" Said Jimmy as he trailed off.

Jimmy was right to be a little confused; Patch was dressed as a milk bottle, like what people in humiliating jobs would wear.

"I am Milk Man!" Said Patch in a jolly voice before clutching his large gut. "I haven't yum yummed in fifty seconds! I want to chomp swallow some foooooood!"

"… If you let em beat you I'll give you a chocolate bar." Offered Jimmy.

Patch's eyes twinkled and he let out a cheer of delight.

"FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!" Cried Patch in happiness as Jimmy tossed him a bar of chocolate.

"Pleasure doing business with you." Smiled Jimmy as he blasted five shots of holographic ice at Patch and defeated him.

* * *

**Confessional: Me think Patch does do be stupidest person on island.**

**Jimmy: Pablo always said the business world is hard; if making a deal simply involves bribing with candy I think he was exaggerating. Then again I don't have a job yet so it's hard to know for certain.**

* * *

Kasimar was walking through an area with a large amount of trees; he had his hands in hic pockets though was keeping his guard up in case one of the 'Robot Masters' tried to jump out at him and take him by surprise. He knew pretty much every one had a grudge on him but he wasn't bothered by it.

"Just six more challenges and I'll be swimming in money." Said Kasimar confidently. "I mean; who's left? A sick cripple, a blond rat, a blond who owns rats, a red headed bimbo, a retarded hair obsessed moron … and of course the manipulator. Since I'm thinking aloud here … I wonder how Nakia is getting on with the task I gave her."

"The trees have ears Kasimar." Loudly whispered a voice from somewhere around him.

Kasimar looked around; he took out his metal blades and kept his eyes peeled while wondering who it was as he didn't recognize the voice.

"Bonsai Banzai!" Yelled Irene in a battle cry as she leapt down from a tree and delivered a hard flying kick to Kasimar's chest which knocked him onto his back.

* * *

**Confessional: I didn't know a kick could fly … does it have wings or something?**

**Irene: It felt so good to do that! Sure he'll probably try and chop me like a tree … but with the trees on my side I cannot fail! Yeehaw!**

* * *

Kasimar quickly leapt back to his feet and tossed a metal blade at Irene; it was a direct hit but Irene took a step closer.

"Well, well, if it isn't Little Miss Kasey." Smirked Irene.

"Shut up! It's 'Kasimar' you stupid tree humper!" Snarled Kasimar.

"Who names their child Kasimar anyway?" Asked Irene curiously. "Well it doesn't matter! I'm going to stop you once and for all!"

"You and what army?" Smirked Kasimar.

"Look around you; that's my army." Grinned Irene.

"Trees? Seriously? What are you; a druid or something?" Scoffed Kasimar.

"As a matter of fact … I am." Nodded Irene. "Now prepare for the most unpleasant prickling of your life and prepare to 'leaf' me alone because I am Nature Man!"

Irene's outfit was line and dark green and had a number of leaves stapled to it (though obviously not on Irene herself). She also had a pair of brown gloves that were covered in leaves.

"Eat metal blades!" Shouted Kasimar as he tossed three metal blades at Irene like they were Frisbees.

Each blade hit Irene but she wasn't out yet. Irene raised her arms and gathered a large amount of leaves, twigs and thorns from around her that floated in mid air; she then hurled a big blast of them at Kasimar which took off five bars of his life meter in one go.

"Do you hear that Kasimar? Do ya do ya do ya?" Giggled Irene victoriously.

"Hear what?" Asked Kasimar.

"The trees are cheering me on." Said Irene in determination.

"Well prepare for a little 'tree … t." Said Kasimar as he punched the tree that he and Irene were next to with all his might.

"Stop that! Trees have feelings as well!" Scolded Irene.

Irene took a step forward and a large amount of acorns fell on her and completely buried her in a pile. The sound of the 'you're dead' noise was heard.

"Two down, a lot more to go." Said Kasimar in satisfaction. "See you around Tree shagger!"

Kasimar spat on the pile of acorns that Irene was buried under and jogged off to find another Robot Master.

A few moments after he left Irene burst out of the pile still half buried and spat out a few acorns.

"_I hate that guy_." Thought Irene in disgust. "_It's guys like him that make me glad that I'm a lesbian_."

* * *

**Confessional: Hide your lesbians! TV tropes shout out!**

**Irene: Well; I put up a good fight at least. That poor oak tree though! He really needed some T.L.S, by that I mean tender loving care!**

**Kasimar: Did you see how the acorns fell on her? I wish it had been heavy rocks; then she'd have been crushed like a bug under someone's shoe! Yahahahahaha!**

**Fifi: Did Kasimar's mother drink when she was pregnant with him or something?**

* * *

"Eat some fruit because I am Fruit Man!" Declared Mable while dressed as a banana and on a pair of crutches. "I feel ridiculous … but it could be worse like if I was dressed as a tomato, then everyone would be confused if I was a fruit or a vegetables."

"I think most of us know *cough* that tomato's are fruits." Assured Spider.

"Good; it gets annoying when nobody knows the difference." Said Mable with a small grumble. "Ready to fight?"

"Are *gag* you able to?" Asked Spider while looking at Mable's cast in concern.

"I'll be fine; I'm healing at a decent pace." Assured Mable as she took out a banana. "Say hello to the banana bomb!"

"Err … hello." Said Spider nervously as he wondering what the banana bomb would do.

Mable tossed the banana bomb which bounced off the ground and exploded into several smaller banana's which bounced around and also exploded. Spider had ducked and covered; due to this every one of the little banana bomblets missed him.

"Aw bananas!" Said Mable with a snap of her fingers. "That was my only banana bomb. Now what?"

"… I guess I *cough* win." Said Spider as he began to use his thunder beam on Mable. Mable felt no pain at all due to her outfit and after ten hits she was defeated.

"Looks like you defeated me." Smiled Mable in mock surrender. "You may now have me as one of your five a day."

"I'll *cough* pass." Said Spider in amusement. "See you later Mable; are *cough* you able to get back to camp?"

"I'll be fine; besides, I like it in the woods." Assured Mable wistfully. "Nothing like getting back to basics right?"

* * *

**Confessional: Basic materials include wood and timber.**

**Spider: It's kind of funny how common ***cough* **the misconception of tomato's being vegetables ***cough* **is. If it has seeds in it then it ***cough* **is a fruit.**

* * *

Tabitha hadn't seen any Robot Masters in a while and was getting a little bit annoyed.

"Where are those robot masters? I may be safe either way but I'd very much like to win solo immunity for a change." Grumbled Tabitha as she looked around.

"Halt she devil! Prepare to get run over by wheel man!" Said Gary as he wheeled slowly towards Tabitha.

Gary was dressed like a car tire and had a steering wheel in place of his chef hat.

"She devil? I'm no she devil." Said Tabitha looking insulted.

"Oh really? Oh, sorry … but would you care to explain why you paid Kasimar to break my legs?" Growled Gary. "And why? Because I had kept my relationship with Raven a secret?"

"It wasn't anything personal; it was just strategy." Said Tabitha coolly.

"You don't know what it's been like! If not for Raven's love and care I do not know _how_ I could have bared my disability this long!" Snarled Gary. "Your parents must be ashamed of you!"

"Oh shut up! You don't know anything about my family." Growled Tabitha.

"Except that they seem to encourage stuff like blackmail! Seriously Tabitha; do you even have any remorse or guilt?" Asked Gary while sounding down.

"Of course I feel some guilt sometimes; I'm not Kasimar." Said Tabitha while mentally thinking back to how Mable got eliminated and then to Barney's elimination the previous day. "You know Gary; nothing in this world happens without a reason or a cause."

"What are you implying?" Asked Gary suspiciously.

"Never you mind; it's not important." Said Tabitha as she changed the subject. "Anyway … your costume looks ridiculous."

"It's not my fault! Chris made us dress up in stupid outfits; I wanted to be Meal Man." Insisted Gary. "But Chris rejected the idea."

After a second of silence Gary threw a bomb shaped like a tire at Tabitha; it caught her off guard and depleted three bars of her life meter. In response Tabitha began throwing her Hyper Bombs at Gary. Before Gary's life meter was depleted he wheeled forwards at Tabitha as fast as he could and wheeled over one of her feet.

"YEOWCH!" Wailed Tabitha as she held her foot and hopped on the spot for a moment or two. She then growled angrily at Gary.

"You seriously had that coming." Said Gary as Tabitha threw a final bomb at him which depleted the last of his life meter and thus he was defeated.

"At least I can actually use my feet." Retorted Tabitha much to Gary's annoyance.

"At least I'm in a relationship." Replied Gary.

"At least I'm rich!" Growled Tabitha.

"… You're fat." Shrugged Gary as he wheeled off leaving Tabitha steaming in anger.

* * *

**Confessional: They were arguing like children! Hahahaha!**

**Tabitha: I'm not fat! I'm nothing like that slob Patch! Looking back maybe making Kasimar do that to Gary was a little harsh … but he and Raven could have really messed up my game plan later on. I'm just playing the game like anyone would; hasn't anyone seen Survivor?**

**Gary: Sure, she beat me … but I think I made my mark. And maybe a bruise on her foot if I'm lucky. Too bad I can't fight Kasimar now. A rematch would be great.**

**Raven: **(She swoons). **What a guy!**

* * *

Kasimar still felt amused at how he had managed to make Irene not only get buried by acorns but also that he had upset her as well.

"I wonder who the next 'Retard Master' will be." Pondered Kasimar out loud. "Hopefully it'll be easy to make them cry."

"I wouldn't bet on it." Said Xaria as she stepped out from behind a tree with a seriously annoyed look, probably because of her attire. "I am Bee Man, buzz, buzz, buzz … I hate you Chris."

Xaria was dressed as a bumble bee; she even had a belt with a stinger and a pair of antennae on a headband. On the back of Xaria's black and yellow stripes shirt were a pair of insect wings.

Kasimar looked at Xaria and looked about ready to laugh or insult her.

"Insult me and I warn you now; I've been working out with Oscar recently." Threatened Xaria in a calm snarky voice.

"… And I thought Heather was the queen bee! Honey I'm home! IO bet you like dream works bee movie! Buzz, buzz, buzz!" Taunted Kasimar with a large number of incredibly lame puns. "Bumble bee! You probably don't even have a sting yet!"

Xaria's eye twitched and she marches over to Kasimar without a single look of fear.

"Screw the challenge; this is personal." Snarled Xaria as she 'stung' Kasimar in the butt with her stinger.

"YEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWCH!" Screamed Kasimar at the top of his lungs as tears began to leak from his eyes.

* * *

**Confessional: Can I have some honeycomb ice cream?**

**Xaria: … I'll buy the DVD of the season just so I can watch that scene over and over and over.**

* * *

Kasimar snarled in rage as he began tossing metal blades at Xaria but the bee dressed girl kept managing to trip him up and 'sting' him over and over and over and over. Xaria's actual weapon was not the stinger but little bee robots. Due to this she wasn't affecting Kasimar's life meter but was really enjoying herself. After Kasimar suffering about twenty five 'stings' from the _really_ sharp stinger on Xaria's costume Xaria was defeated. It came at a price though as Kasimar was now feeling like he was in more agony than a one armed man hanging from the cliff with an itchy ass.

"Just remember that a bee always has a stinger." Said Xaria coolly while watching Kasimar drop to his knees in pain. "You may have lasted a long time in this game; that is impressive. But I ask you this Kasimar … how long will it last?"

With enough being said Xaria left the area to go back to camp while Kasimar let out a very girly pained whimper.

"Dammit … why didn't I just punch her?" Groaned Kasimar as he struggled to get to his feet."

* * *

**Confessional: That was a stinging success! *rimshot***

**Kasimar:** (He looks murderously angry).** I wish she was a real bee; then I could burn her wings off!**

**Xaria: I'm no bully or sadist … but causing Kasimar so much pain felt really good.**

* * *

Spider had come across another robot master; this time he had crossed paths with Zita. Currently they were in the middle of a battle. Zita had lost a little more than half of her life meter while Spider had lost four life units.

"Give it up Spider! You cannot defeat Money Man!" Taunted Zita in a friendly way while shooting holographic dollar signs out of her hat. "Feel the wrath of my ray of riches."

"Money can't buy *cough* happiness." Pointed out Spider as he struck Zita with his Thunder Beam.

"Unless you go to Ebay!" Replied Zita before Spider struck her a last time and he life meter started going haywire and making odd sounds. "Yep; you beat me."

"That's three Robot Master's I've *cough* beaten so far." Said Spider with smile.

"Good job; in the meantime I'm going to go and steal Chris's hair gel; I don't have compulsions to do so … but it'll annoy him and that's a good enough reason for me." Smirked Zita as she took off back to camp.

* * *

**Confessional: It would be a stroke of luck … if Chris Maclean choked on a hockey puck!**

**Spider: I wonder if there is anything ***cough* **you can't find on Ebay. Hmm.**

**Wallace: Stealing is eviiiiil! Mwahahahahahahaha!**

**Quana: I didn't find Spider at all throughout the challenge … I hope he's winning!**

* * *

"Fear me mortal girl! I am Blood Man! Teehee!" Giggled Uzuri in her usual cheerful creepy way.

Uzuri was dressed in a pure blood red outfit that seemed to have blood stains on it; hopefully it wasn't real blood!

"So what are your powers?" Asked Eleanor while pointing her Magnet Missile weapon at Uzuri.

"I'll show you … right now! Blood storm!" Yelled Uzuri spookily.

A shower of fake blood rained down on Eleanor much to her grossed-out-ness. Uzuri seemed to be a strong robot master as she had taken out six of Eleanor's life bars in one go.

"Eww! Yuck! That wasn't real blood was it?" Asked Eleanor with hope that it wasn't real.

"Oh don't worry; Chris may be a big meanie but I don't think that he'd be so mean as to use real blood." Assured Uzuri.

* * *

**Confessional: I hate injections!**

**Eleanor: I hope Uzuri is right!**

**Uzuri: I think Chris mentioned something about getting sued if he used real blood. It would serve that zombie head right! Teehee!**

**Chris: I wanted to use real blood … but I don't want to get sued! Seriously; if anyone caught a blood related disease then my perfect hair would be in the soup!**

* * *

"So Uzuri … what is it that you like about SAW?" Asked Eleanor in hopes of distracting Uzuri.

"You'd like to know? That's nice; not many people share my interest of horror movies." Smiled Uzuri as she began to explain why she liked the SAW series.

As she spoke Eleanor quickly blasted her with holographic magnets and after about fifteen hits Uzuri's life meter was depleted. Uzuri noticed this and realized what Eleanor had done.

"…You're good." Said Uzuri sounding impressed. "How did you know I get distracted so easily?"

"Oh; just a feeling." Giggled Eleanor knowingly.

* * *

**Confessional: I feel like I'm going to fart! **

**Eleanor: I've really been having fun in this challenge … though I think I might need to wash my cloths later. Fake blood stains are … not very appealing to put it lightly. Ick!**

* * *

Lavender felt a little exasperated; she had been walking through the forest for over an hour since she had defeated Daisy with distinction. She was starting to wonder if she was going to find anymore robot masters when somebody jumped down from a tree and landed a short distance in front of her.

"Prepare to battle Space Man!" Said Andy as he struck a pose.

Andy was dressed like an astronaut minus the helmet. He also had the icon of Team Puzzle on the left side of his chest.

"Oh I get it; you're space man because you like outer space and stuff right?" Asked Lavender.

"Pretty much, yeah." Nodded Andy as he took out two boomerangs with the texture and pattern of the moon on them. "Go Moonarangs!"

Andy threw both Moonarangs though Lavender ducked and struck him with two well thrown shadow blades. The Moonarangs returned back to Andy though Lavender dodged them as they flew back to their owner and hit him with some more shadow blades.

"Time to change tactics." Said Andy as he took out a new weapon; a sort of rocket shaped gun. "Time to blast you into orbit!"

Andy shot a holographic rocket at Lavender; she easily dodged it but it began to quickly turned around and fly back at her.

"Did I mention that the rockets are homing?" Asked Andy. "Personally I'd have rather battled Nakia as she deserves to lose unlike you."

"The only thing that could satisfy me is if that little delusional brat suffers something so ad that I can't even think of it yet!" Declared Lavender as she ran towards Andy; she stood there for a second or two before diving out the way as the holographic rocket hit Andy.

Andy's life meter buzzed out the 'you're dead' noise and Lavender knew that she had beaten Andy.

"Good fight Lavender." Said Andy as he offered his hand for a shake.

"Thanks; but I know that touching you will make me lose some of my life." Said Lavender with a smirk. "Nice try though."

"It was worth a try." Shrugged Andy.

* * *

**Confessional: Shake your booty ... erm … I mean shake your handy!**

**Lavender: That's the oldest trick in the book; it's on the contents page!**

**Andy: Lavender is definitely the smartest cheerleader I've ever met … Barney sure is lucky! Of course; I'm very happy being with Mable.**

* * *

Jimmy had so far defeated two robot masters and was on the look out for another. He was also hoping that he wouldn't run into Kasimar or Nakia as he didn't really think he had much chance of a fair fight.

"Yoo-hoo; Robot Masters!" Called Jimmy. "Come out come out wherever you are."

"If that is your wish." Said Quana as she stepped out from behind a large rock. "Prepare for a musical thrashing from Music Man!"

Quana was wearing a purple outfit with golden music notes all over it. She also had a hat with a treble clef on top as well as a gun shaped exactly like a microphone.

"Hi Quana; it's nice to see you." Smiled Jimmy at his good friend. "It was so unfair how you were eliminated!"

"I know; I found out exactly what happened once I arrived at the Playa Des Losers." Said Quana in disdain. "But it not do to dwell on the past. Now; I've been instructed to take you out of the competition … so … are you ready?"

"I sure am; oh, and jus to let you know, Spider really misses you." Said Jimmy truthfully. "I've heard him mention your name in his sleep sometimes."

"…That's really sweet." Cooed Quana softly. "I miss Spider as well."

Seeing that Quana was distracted Jimmy fired two blasts from his Ice Slasher at her.

"Hey! You distracted me!" Said Quana with a playful frown.

"That I did … but I wasn't lying about Spider missing you." Promised Jimmy as he blasted Quana again.

"Time to listen to my music!" Declared Quana as she aimed the microphone at Jimmy and fired a couple of music notes at him at the same time as him firing upon her.

Both of the two lost life on their life bar's but Quana ran out of health first.

"Good job Jimmy." Said Quana as he life bar made the 'you're dead' sound. "Chris said I was supposed to be a hard robot master to beat."

"Ice Blaster to save the day!" Giggled Jimmy as he held up his weapon.

Quana laughed at the joke and started to walk back to camp.

"Good luck with Eleanor." Called Quana before she was out of sight which made Jimmy blush.

* * *

**Confessional: You've heard of a slushie puppy … how about a 'blushie puppy'?**

**Jimmy: How many of the ex campers know that I **_**lik**_**e Eleanor anyway?**

**Quana: Jimmy's crush on Eleanor is really cute; I wish him all the best of luck.**

* * *

Spider was in the middle of a battle against Vinnie and the Russian teen was proving to be quite a powerful opponent.

"As ridiculous as it sounds you cannot beat Penguin Man!" Grinned Vinnie while dressed up as a penguin.

"I thought the phrase *cough* was that you cannot beat 'Air Man'." Said Spider as he struck Vinnie with his thunder beam.

"Same difference." Shrugged Vinnie as he blasted another holographic ice ball at Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: I think that was a Total Drama Alphabet shout out! Woohoo!**

**Vinnie: Spider defeated me; but I **_**almost**_** had him! I left him with a single unit of life left. Though personally I'd have rather battled Kasimar, Nakia or Tabitha … but Chris told us to battle the first person we see. **

**Spider: It's pretty much guaranteed I'm ***cough* **not going to win this challenge ***sneeze*** now right?**

* * *

A few hours had passed since the challenge had started and Kasimar had defeated three Robot Masters in total. This wasn't enough in his opinion.

"Where are those #bleep# robot masters?" Asked Kasimar out loud.

"Mwahahahahahahaha!" Rang a manical laughter from somewhere in the shadows nearby.

"Manical laughter … that could only be one person." Said Kasimar as he narrowed his eyes and took out his metal blades.

"Prepare for your final steps on the path unwinding." Said the voice from a totally different location around Kasimar. "You have finally met your match … prepare yourself for a battle with … EVIL MAN!"

Wallace leapt out of a tree and landed on Kasimar's shoulders. He managed to make Kasimar fall to the ground and began shooting a concurrent stream of black capital E's at him.

"Get offa me!" Snarled Kasimar as he grabbed Wallace by the ankle and swung him over his head and onto the ground.

"It's evil vs wicked! I'm cool and you are sick!" Sang Wallace sing songly as he shot more capital E's at Kasimar.

Kasimar was getting angry and tossed a barrage of metal blades at Wallace. Wallace lost a fair amount of his life units but wasn't out of it just yet.

* * *

**Confessional: Evil vs **_**Evil**_**! Guess who is who!**

**Wallace: the best part about being an awesome bad guy is that I can make a comeback in a fight regardless of the odds of me doing so! Mwahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Just as Kasimar was about to stomp down hard on Wallace's gut Wallace rolled out of the way and activated some music … but it wasn't his theme music though…

_Who lives in a pineapple under the sea!_

_SpongeBob Squarepants!_

"AAAAARGH! I hate that song!" Screamed Kasimar as he grabbed Wallace's sunglasses and snapped them.

Wallace, now with his yellow eyes revealed for the first time, looked angry.

"You can betray me, you can vote me off, you can take evil too far, you can even destroy the world … but _nobody_ breaks my sunglasses!" Roared Wallace as he gathered energy for a very powerful capital E.

"Well I just did!" Sneered Kasimar as he prepared to throw a handful of metal blades.

Kasimar and Wallace reared back and both blasted out their respective attacks and both hit each other at the exact same time.

A fraction of a second later both Kasimar and Wallace's life bars made the 'you're dead' sound. Kasimar's eye twitched as he realized what had happened.

"You little #bleep#! You ruined my chances of immunity!" Screamed Kasimar in anger.

"And that is why you should never underestimate a bad guy! … Or break his sunglasses either!" Smirked Wallace. "Mwahahahahahahahahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Never underestimate the underdog! Wise words of Johnny Gomez!**

**Kasimar: Greta; **_**just**_** great! I got beaten by a retard! And now I can't win immunity … this bites.**

**Wallace: Mwahahahahahahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Spider was walking through the woods and in the direction of camp. Spider thought that defeating four robot masters would be enough for a realistic chance at immunity. Plus; since he only had a single bar of life left it was pretty given that he wouldn't be able to defeat another Robot Master anyway.

"I hope Quana's back *cough* at camp." Said Spider hopefully. "I'd like to *sneeze* see her again."

Spider heard some footsteps but upon turning his head he couldn't see anyone.

"Must be my *cough* imagination." Shrugged Spider.

As Spider walked a few more steps he heard the noise again and turned around to see what it was' this time he did see who it was, and he paled a little more than his usual skin tone.

Nakia was standing a short distance away with the most _nasty_ snarl he had ever seen. Even more worrying was that she was holding a steel pipe in her hands and was tapping it against one of her hands in an almost mocking way.

"Well look what we've got here." Said Nakia haughtily. "The cockroach returning to his nest. I always hated cockroaches."

"What are you doing *cough* with that pipe?" Asked Spider nervously.

"I'm glad you asked." Smirked Nakia. "I'm here to finally give you the beating you have been weaseling your way out of since day one."

Spider gulped and shook in fear as Nakia took a single step towards him. Neither of them noticed a figure watching all this from behind a tree.

"For too long you've escaped your karma." Said Nakia with a deep breath of steadily rising anger. "You somehow turned everyone against a perfect good haired role model such as myself. You always hid behind others and were too cowardly to face your punishment."

"Nakia; I'm very sorry *cough* if I've done something to you." Apologized Spider as Nakia took another step towards him. "But I really don't think *cough* I'm to blame for you to be voted off."

"Shut … the … _fuck_ … up!" Said Nakia calmly and in a seriously unnerving tone. "You are nothing more than a lowly, bad haired, cripple. It's beyond me how you've lasted as long as you have. But you won't last much longer once you've permanently lost your ability to walk."

Nakia took another step towards Spider and by now she was a mere six steps away from him.

"You don't have anybody left to hide behind; no more undeserved friends to help you." Taunted Nakia. "Nobody is here but you and me. That mental retard Barney is gone with a broken leg. Your Hispanic Horse Whore of a girlfriend is gone. You've got _nowhere_ left to run."

Spider's fear was suddenly replaced with a feeling of true anger upon Nakia insulting his beloved and his best friend.

"What did you just *cough* say?" Asked Spider in a small whisper.

"Oh? Don't like me insulting your 'friends', and I use that term loosely." Laughed Nakia. "I used to think Quana deserved better than a cockroach like you … but now I see I was wrong. She's a cockroach as well! She had it all and she threw it away. But no matter; if she wants to end up as a prostitute then it's no problem of mine. Are all Hispanic's that lame?"

"SHUT UP!" Screamed Spider in _**rage**_ at Nakia.

"What did you just say to me? Did you tell me to … shut up?" Asked Nakia in a deadly whisper.

"Yes! I did! And you *cough* know why?" Said Spider angrily.

Nakia stopped talking; Spider seemed to be angry now, something Nakia didn't think possible.

"You're the worst person I *cough* know! Even worse than Kasimar! You're *cough* obsessed with your stupid hair to a ridiculous degree, you *cough* judge somebody before getting to know them and you *cough* expect everyone to serve you! And why? Because _apparently_ you *cough* have the best hair … who gives a _shit_? You're also a complete whiner! I *cough* haven't ever heard you say anything that isn't *gag* whiny! You're a low down bully with nothing to show your yourself and yet you somehow think you're the best thing *cough* since the Nintendo Wii! You think Quana and me are filth and *cough* shouldn't be dating; but I don't see _you_ with that special someone! Who the _hell_ are _**you**_ to talk down to someone? You're one of the dumbest people in Canada most *cough* likely and you can barely fend for yourself if *cough* it isn't about friggin hair! You're racist, you're discriminatory … and you *cough* are so shallow you make a puddle look like an _**OCEAN**_! But you know what the worst of it is Nakia? … You're *cough* incapable of acknowledging your own faults and when you fail *cough* you try and bring others down with you even *cough* if they've done nothing to you! And you think it's _my_ fault you got voted *cough* off! You have only one person to blame … yourself! Try to think of something besides yourself you little _bitch_! It helps with humility!"

Spider took deep slow breaths in and out for a few moments while Nakia was rooted to the spot completely dumbstruck and shocked at what Spider had said to her.

Spider suddenly blinked and realized what he had said to Nakia and blinked again.

"Err … I don't know what came *cough* over me." Said Spider before growing some bravery. "But that is what I *cough* think of you Nakia."

Nakia blinked and raised the steel pipe.

"Forget crippling you … I'm going to smash. Your. Skull!" Growled Nakia.

SPLAT!

That _wasn't_ the sound of Nakia hitting Spider; not at all.

Nakia froze and dropped the pipe; she then reached up to her hair and paled.

SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT!

Nakia began to hyperventilate as she felt around her hair in panic. And do you know why?

Every single bit of her hair was _completely_ jammed with bubblegum. You may now begin laughing at her.

"!" Screamed Nakia as she wailed and ran off blubbering in terror.

Spider let out a sigh of relief and looked in the direction the shots of bubblegum had come from.

Standing there was none other than Barney. He was on crutches and dressed as a bubblegum wrapper.

"Ahoy me heartie!" Waved Barney cheerfully. "Looks like I've avenged my broken leg."

"Barney!" Said Spider sounding relieved. "You got here just *cough* in time."

"I've been watching everything that happened just then savvy." Said Barney. "I had to step in to stop her from attacking you yaaar … but I must say that you were doing _**quite**_ well on your own me heartie."

"Thanks … I don't know what came *cough* over me." Confessed Spider. "I guess I finally lost my temper."

"And congratulations for that." Clapped Barney. "Now; you're down to one unit on life right?"

"Yep; I guess you'll be *cough* defeating me then right?" Asked Spider.

"Nope … I'll let you beat me. I want you to win this challenge." Said Barney. "After all you've had to put up with I think you'll enjoy solo immunity."

"…Thank you Barney." Said Spider in a touched voice. "You are a true friend."

"Think nothing of it me heartie." Said Barney modestly.

* * *

**Confessional: Was that a crowning moment of awesome?**

**Spider: I think Nakia's karma has ***cough* **finally struck her. I don't usually get **_**that**_*cough*** angry … but it felt good!**

**Barney: All's well tat ends well right me hearties?**

**Nakia: **(She is pale and seems to be catatonic due to the gum all over her hair). **My hair … my hair … my hair…**

* * *

A short while later the campers and ex campers were back at camp. Kasimar looked injured, Nakia's hair was gummed up and most of the others were smiling. Chris paced before them and flashed a big grin.

"Well everyone; that was a brilliant challenge! It had everything that will make it a ratings success! Haha!" Laughed Chris heartily. "Each of you defeated at least one robot master … but one of you defeated the most."

"Nakia defeated a single robot master and thus is in last place."

Most of the campers both competing and voted off laughed at Nakia's misfortune while she just whimpered.

"Tabitha, Lavender and Eleanor both defeated two each." Said Chris. "Better than Nakia … but not enough tow in the challenge! Sucks to be you! Haha!"

The girls just frowned at Chris as he continued announcing the results.

"Jimmy defeated a decent three and is in third place."

Jimmy bowed modestly while almost every applauded.

"Kasimar defeated a goodly amount of four … but he lost all of his life so really he did just as bad as Nakia! Haha!" Sneered Chris.

"#bleep# you Chris!" Said Kasimar as he flipped Chris off.

"And that means that Spider is the winner of the challenge due to defeated a grand total of five Robot Masters!" Declared Chris.

A thunderous applause greeted Spider to which he just smiled shyly.

"So Spider wins immunity from tonight's vote and today's special prize. Today's prize is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

A set of Mega Man action figures!"

"Err; thanks I *cough* think." Said Spider uncertainly.

"The rest of you could be voted off tonight. I'll see you at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony in two hours." Said Chris idly. "Oh; and the ex campers will have to leave tonight with whoever is voted off. Also; due to the voting camera getting unplugged last time … you will now write your votes on paper and put them a in a ballot box from now on."

Chris left to his personal trailer while the campers began to mill about and mingle.

Quana ran up to Spider and glomped him before giving him a big kiss.

"Barney told me what Nakia almost did to you and how you stood up for yourself." Said Quana in admiration. "I'm so proud of you."

"Well; I kind of exploded when she started making a hate speech about you." Mumbled Spider.

"Well thank you Spider." Said Quana as she hugged her boyfriend tightly. "And boy; Nakia's 'gummed up look' really suits her!"

"It sure does …so; what should we do now?" Asked Spider.

"Since we have some time before the Bonfire Ceremony I think we have time for a cuddle." Giggled Quana as she walked with Spider to his cabin while holding hands.

* * *

**Confessional: Time to seal someone's fate like the seal on a jam jar!**

**Spider: Goodbye Nakia; you could ***cough* **have lost with dignity … but now your hope of winning is gone ***sneeze* **along with most of your hair.**

**Lavender: **(She is grinning). **Nakia.**

**Jimmy: I vote Kasimar; I just want him gone.**

**Tabitha: You've outlived your usefulness.**

**Nakia: **(She just whimpers)

* * *

The seven campers sat around the bonfire; some were glaring at Kasimar while others were glaring hatefully at Nakia. The ex campers were already on a bigger boat than the usual Boat of Losers where the camper voted off would ride to the playa with them. Chris arrived with a tray of six marshmallows and set them down on the oil drum.

"Hey everyone; today was just totally filled with drama eh? Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he gazed at Nakia's ruined hair. "In just a few moments only six of you will be left. Who's going to be eliminated? … Let's find out."

"I bet it's either Kasimar or Nakia." Said Eleanor confidently.

"When I call your name, come and get your marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the Big Boat of Losers … and you can't come back … ever!"

Chris yelled the last word very loudly but the campers were so used to it by now that they didn't react to it.

"First up is our immunity winner. Spider." Said Chris as he beckoned Spider to come up.

Spider smiled as he got up from his stump and collected his marshmallow.

"Lavender; much to my dismay you are safe too." Said Chris as he tossed Lavender her marshmallow.

"Jimmy"

"Tabitha"

"Eleanor"

Kasimar and Nakia sat on their stumps; both still without a marshmallow. Kasimar gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes in determination while Nakia just whimpered due to the sticky state her hair was in.

"Kasimar, Nakia … this is the final marshmallow of the night." Said Chris as he held up the last marshmallow on the tray. "Tonight's final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Kasimar."

Kasimar smugly claimed his marshmallow while Nakia's eye twitched in shock at what had happened. For the first time in her life … she had been defeated.

"Well Nakia; the dock of shame awaits you … again." Smirked Chris. "Looks like you no longer have the best hair! Haha!"

Nakia got up and walked towards the dock of shame in an oddly silent way. She seemed to be hyper venting and her breathing was very erratic.

Chris turned to the remaining six who seemed glad Nakia was gone.

"You six are safe … for tonight." Smirked Chris. "But tomorrow is another story. You may leave."

The remaining six campers left for bed; both content that Nakia was gone and proud that they had made it so far in the game. Only five more challenges and someone would win.

* * *

Nakia was hunched over on a chair on the Big Boat

of Losers. She had lost again and her hair was a mess. Nakia felt sick and humiliated.

"Oh how could things get worse?" Wailed Nakia.

"Grab her Oscar!" Said a voice.

Nakia suddenly felt herself being restrained by a strong pair of arms; she immediately knew it was Oscar. Nakia tried to break free but was unable to.

"Let me go you steroid freak!" Demanded Nakia.

"Oh Naaaakia!" Called a sing song voice ahead of her.

Nakia looked up and saw the other eighteen ex campers grinning at her; the crowd parted and Quana walked up to her and stopped two steps away from her.

"Barany told me what you tried to do to my little arachnid. That wasn't nice." Growled Quana before she grinned mischievously. "That is why I have decide to give you your comeuppance … personally."

Quana took out a wireless hair trimmer; the type they use in a barber shop. Nakia paled as she knew _exactly_ what Quana was going to do to her. As the buzzing razor of the hair trimmer began to shave Nakia's hair Nakia let out a blood curdling scream that could be heard everywhere in a four hundred square mile radius.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame and grinned for the camera.

"And that ends it! Nakia has been voted off again and it looks like Spider can breath a sigh of relief at last. But Kasimar is still on the island and he might be harder to get rid off! Haha! Who will be the next camper voted off? Will the next challenge be even more dramatic? Can I get anymore awesome? And what game series is the scariest? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Eleanor: Nakia

Jimmy: Kasimar

Kasimar: Nakia

Lavender: Nakia

Nakia: (Didn't vote due to shock)

Spider: Nakia

Tabitha: Nakia

Nakia: 5

Kasimar: 1

No votes: 1

* * *

Voted off: Voted Off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia again.

* * *

And there you have it! How is that for a humiliation conga? Nakia's hopes and dreams are gone along with her hair. Karma has finally struck … and she isn't the last person it will strike either…

Next Time: This hill is very Silent…


	51. Day 24, Part 1, Messages From Home

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the Alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his incredible story Total Drama Alphabet. And while I'm at it I also do not own Silent Hill. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains messages from home, a wedgie, Silent Hill, a sadistic host and an increasingly worse complete monster of a bully. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana, BarneyxLavender, **JimmyxEleanor, **AndyxMable, GaryxRaven, VinniexUzuri, OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Sorry for the wait everyone; I've been kind of busy lately … and I've gotten my GCSE results back! I think they weren't too bad … except for my math grade … but that's not the point! Day 24 of TDL is going to be the most dramatic episode of all of them. I won't say what happens … but stuff is indeed going to happen! Now that chapter 51 is submitted only twelve more chapters are still to be written. I thank you all for reading so far into the story; I doubt I could have made it this far without my fans. Now enough talk let's get this show on the road!

Any hill is Silent; they don't speak or anything do they?

* * *

Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame ready and raring to go. The show was almost over now that only six of the original twenty six campers remained in the game. Chris made grand gestures with his arms and began to speak to the camera.

"Last time on Total Drama Letters. For the first time since episode one … every single campers was on the island! None of the losers were returning to the game but they had a very important job in the challenge … they were to dress up as Robot Masters!"

"You see; the challenge was based on Mega Man, a good game that is as hard to win at as it is to cut a diamond. Seriously! Turn the difficulty down! I cannot beat Air Man! Anyway; each of the final seven campers was given a life meter and a rip off of a classic Mega Man weapon. Their challenge was to go into the forest and hunt down the Robot Masters. Whoever defeated the most would win immunity and thus a free pass into the final six."

"Some of the robot masters proved to be more of a match to beat than others. Xaria was Bee Man because I wanted people to laugh at her … but she really had a lot of sting as Kasimar found out … literally! Others proved to be pitiful, such as Patch who Jimmy bribed into letting him defeat the fat guy in exchange for a chocolate bar … so pathetic."

"Kasimar came across his old partner in crime Wallace who he backstabbed back in episode ten; Wallace put up a good fight against our resident monster … but Kasimar made a foolish mistake. Apparently nothing angers Wallace more than having his sunglasses broken. We now know Wallace becomes powerful when angry … and that his eyes are yellow. Wallace and Kasimar took each other out of the challenge at the exact same moment in time which meant Kasimar was eliminated from the challenge.

"Spider managed to defeat four robot masters and was down to a single unit of life. On his way back to camp he came across Nakia. Something has changed in that girl since the beginning of this contest … and I love it! Her homicidal axe crazy attitude it _grrrrreat_ for ratings! Nakia wielded a steel pipe and intended to cripple Spider for the rest of his life."

"It turns out that having his girlfriend and his best friend insulted really pisses Spider off. Spider finally gained courage and stood up to Nakia. He told her exactly why she sucked and called her out on all that she has done. After his rant was over Nakia looked like she had been sucker punched by a heavy weight wrestler! Haha!"

"Nakia was about to cripple Spider but somebody in the shadows fired bubble gum into her hair and caused her to retreat while screaming and wailing. It turned out to be Barney; Barney congratulated Spider for standing up to Nakia and allowed him to defeat him. Pretty lame but this meant Spider won the challenge and immunity.

"In the Bonfire Ceremony it came down to Kasimar and Nakia. And let em tell you; the fan base absolutely _despises _those two! Seeing as Nakia was now at her weakest it was Nakia who was voted off and Kasimar was spared from elimination and got the final marshmallow."

"Nakia's humiliation didn't end there. Once she boarded the Big Boat of Losers with the other nineteen campers who had been voted off previously Oscar restrained her and Quana shaved all her hair off with a hair trimmer! Haha! Sucks to be Nakia!"

"With Nakia gone, along with all of her hair, only six campers remain. Who will be the next camper to be voted off? Will anyone go crazy? Can Kasimar retreat much further from his so called karma? And which game series is scariest … Resident Evil or Silent Hill? Find out the answers to all of these and more right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous).

* * *

Spider felt relieved and happy as he sat against a tree near camp. And why shouldn't he? Nakia had finally been voted off the island and he was pretty sure she wouldn't be giving him anymore trouble after what had happened to her yesterday. Spider may not have had the best luck in the world during his life but there was a saying he truly believed in.

_Good will always triumph over Evil._

Nakia had bullied Spider throughout her return and had gotten Barney injured and eliminated; and Spider was sure she had a hand in voting Quana off. But her karma had caught up with her at last. Spider felt he could finally breathe a small sigh of relief.

"I wonder how much further *cough* Kasimar can retreat from his inevitable *cough* downfall." Asked Spider out loud to no one in particular.

"Probably not very far." Said Eleanor as she walked up and sat down next to Spider. "I'm amazed he has managed to make it to the final six."

"Oh, hi Eleanor." Greeted Spider. "Are you having a *cough* good day?"

"Yep! Lately I'm in a really good mood." Chirped Eleanor cheerfully. "With the baby ferrets born and Nakia finally gone I think we've got a few good days ahead of us."

"I agree; everyone left in *cough* the competition is nice … except for *cough* Kasimar." Said Spider uneasily. "One of us is eventually going to *cough* have to stand up to him and that would likely result in *cough* a fight."

"I agree; Kasimar kind of scares me … but he's got no allies and now that Nakia is gone he's the prime target. As soon as he fails to win immunity he's outta here; kinda like in skatoony." Mused Eleanor.

"The problem is that nobody can *cough* deny he's the strongest of everyone who's *cough* left." Pointed out Spider. "He won immunity six times in *sneeze* a row before now … maybe he'll restart his winning *cough* streak today."

"Hmm, maybe." Pondered Eleanor. "But there is every chance that he won't. It all depends on what the challenge is."

"What type of challenge couldn't *cough* he do?" Asked Spider in thought.

"Maybe taking care of something; Kasimar is about as caring and gentle as a shark in a blood induced feeding frenzy." Said Eleanor before blinking. "Wow; that sounded like something that Uzuri would say."

"Yeah; she may have been *cough* oddball but she was a *cough* genuinely nice person." Recalled Spider. "Quite an *sneeze* artist too."

"So many of our friends have been voted off." Sighed Eleanor. "Andy … Oscar … Barney…"

"Xaria … Zita." Remembered Spider.

"And Quana." Said Eleanor hesitantly.

"… Y-yeah … even *cough* Quana." Said Spider while looking sad for a moment. "But we'll see them *cough* again."

"It's funny isn't it?" Said Eleanor after a few seconds of silence. "A few days ago most of out team was here … now all that left of Team Puzzle is you, Jimmy … and myself."

"Well; Team Puzzle still has the *cough* most remaining members." Pointed out Spider. "Team Grenade only has *cough* Lavender and Kasimar … and Tabitha is the sole remaining member *cough* of Team Jungle."

"We only arrived on this island twenty four days ago … but so much has happened since then that it feels like an eternity." Said Eleanor wistfully as the wind blew a single leaf off the tree they sat against and down to the ground nearby.

* * *

**Confessional: (Insert nonsensical random funny pun here)**

**Eleanor: I remember on day one when we only just arrived that Daisy said Jimmy shouldn't be here. Now he's in the final six. Funny how things happen isn't it? I'm pleased I've made it this far; I consider myself friends with everyone who is left … besides Kasimar. It should be a nice end to the competition no matter what happens.**

**Spider: So I've made it to the ***cough* **final six and Nakia is gone … I'm feeling pretty ***cough* **good about myself. As long as Kasimar doesn't attack me I ***sneeze* **think I'll enjoy the remaining five days on ***cough*** this island. I couldn't have got this far without my friends … so thank** *cough*** you very much. Especially you Quana.**

**Chris: … Lame!**

* * *

Lavender was in an exceedingly good mood. Nakia had been voted off with gummed up hair … and judging by her screams she made when the boat pulled away her hair had been shaved off too! Lavender hoped it would never grow back; after how Nakia tormented everyone she fully deserved it.

"It's nice to be able to eat breakfast and not hear Nakia go on about her hair." Smiled Lavender as she took a bite of her toast which was only slightly burned. "Now if only karma would knock Kasimar down like a bowling pin as well."

As Lavender finished eating her toast Jimmy entered the mess hall looking both happy but a bit conflicted as well.

"Good morning Jimmy." Waved Lavender cheerfully. "Isn't it a great day? No Nakia!"

"Yeah; that's pretty good." Smiled Jimmy as he sat down though he still looked a little worried.

"What's the matter Jimmy?" Asked Lavender upon noticing her smaller friend's look of worry.

"Well … I don't know why but I've got a bad feeling about today. I just can't shake it off." Explained Jimmy. "It's the same gut aching feeling I got when Dobby died in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows."

"I understand; but at the same time I don't … if that makes sense." Answered Lavender. "I'm sure it's just your imagination as well as you feeling confuzzled due to your feelings for Eleanor."

"You're probably right." Said Jimmy as he helped himself to some toast that was on a plate in the middle of the table and took a bite. "We've got really far in the contest haven't we Lavender?"

"We sure have; it's day twenty four unless I've lost track of the days." Nodded Lavender. "It's funny when you think about exactly who of the twenty six of us got this far."

"What do you mean?" Asked jimmy curiously.

"Well; the final six consists of a cheerleader, a child, an animal lover, a sick guy, a rich girl and a sadistic bully. Some say it's coincidence or fate … I call it destiny." Said Lavender in an almost mystic sounding tone.

"I call it Chris picking a wild bunch of people for the show who would never normally interact with each other." Replied Jimmy with a smile. "So; Nakia is finally gone. I bet Spider is happy."

"Barney told me how he stood up to Nakia." Said Lavender with an impressed look on her face. "If anyone should have put that little witch in her place it had to have been Spider."

"If only I could stand up to Kasimar … but quite frankly he scares me." Said Jimmy with a gulp at the thought of the bully.

"Don't worry about it Jimmy; nobody would expect you to take on a seventeen year old sadistic bully by yourself anyway." Smiled Lavender reassuringly. "Besides; I think everyone left in the competition is a little scared of him in some way."

"Thanks Lavender." Smiled Jimmy before wondering whether he should tell Lavender what he wanted to.

"Something on your mind?" Asked Lavender as she noticed Jimmy's expression of deep thought.

"I was just wondering … how do I get Eleanor's attention?" Asked Jimmy while sounding eager to know.

"… I'd say to do something _really_ nice for her. I'm not sure what exactly … but when the time comes I'm sure you will know." Advised Lavender.

"Thanks Lavender." Said Jimmy gratefully.

"No problem." Replied Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: Here's a math problem! 2 + 2! What's the answer to **_**that**_** rock hard question?**

**Jimmy: When the time is right huh? Hmm … when will the time be right? I don't think Lavender told me that part…**

**Lavender: I ship Jimmy and Eleanor; young love just makes me squee inside, strange as it may sound.**

* * *

Tabitha was pacing in the woods; Kasimar was leaning against a tree looking indifferent and also looking at her butt though Tabitha didn't realize that.

"Ok Kasimar; with Nakia gone we are at a slight disadvantage." Said Tabitha after a few moments more of pacing. "Instead of having three votes of seven in our favor we now have two of six. We're in the minority of the vote."

"So why did you vote off Nakia? Pretty dumb move you stupid bitch." Said Kasimar without much interest.

"First of all; don't call me that." Growled Tabitha. "Second; her hair was gummed up. If she survived the ceremony then she would only whimper and whine, she wouldn't be anymore use to us. And that reminds me…"

Tabitha walked up to Kasimar and frowned.

"What made you think asking Nakia to cripple Spider with a _steel pipe_ was a good idea?" Demanded Tabitha.

"For the lulz." Shrugged Kasimar. "There is nothing as funny as going to a hospital and laughing at the disabled people."

"… That's just wrong." Mumbled Tabitha as she face palmed. "Look; the next challenge will be starting soon and whatever happens you _have_ to win immunity. If you don't then I doubt I could save you."

"No problem; my competition are pushovers."

"Hmm; quite." Muttered Tabitha. "Now that Nakia is gone I might get votes if I don't persuade others to vote with me. The other four are all good friends with each other. Jimmy and Spider won't vote for Eleanor and vice versa … but I could convince them to vote for Lavender with the right words."

"How about we do it the old fashioned way." Suggested Kasimar. "Pay me some money and I'll beat them up or emotionally destroy them."

"I dread to think how you would accomplish the latter … but I'll keep the plan in mind just in case." Stated Tabitha as she turned away from Kasimar and continued pacing. "Whatever happens we need to make sure we vote off a strong or likable opponent … actually; now that I think about all four of them are either strong or likable, meh, they'll go down one by one anyway."

"Speaking of likable; I have a bit of interesting information for you." Said Kasimar suddenly.

"What is it? I don't suppose you know Chris's biggest secret so I can blackmail him." Asked Tabitha casually.

"Nope; better. Eleanor's rat thing has had it's babies." Explained Kasimar.

"And this helps us how? Not only that … but how do you know? I doubt the others told you." Said Tabitha skeptically.

"They didn't; I listened in on their conversation." Said Kasimar. "I think Eleanor would be the best target; with those newborn rats she's going to be more focused and determined in the challenges."

"Good idea; still, it depends on who would be the bigger threat. I'll keep an eye on Eleanor and Lavender to decide." Assured Tabitha.

"What about Bug and Jimmy?" Asked Kasimar.

"They can stay for now." Said Tabitha airily. "I don't think either of them are big threats. Let's get back to camp … though don't come the same way or the others might get suspicious."

Tabitha turned to head back to camp; Kasimar seemed to have gotten a nasty idea as he grabbed the top of Tabitha's purple panties and yanked hard.

"YEEEEOWW!" Shrieked Tabitha as Kasimar let go. Tabitha turned to Kasimar with a murderous expression.

SMACK!

Tabitha punched Kasimar hard in the jaw and sent him stumbling back a few steps.

"Ow! What was that for?" Whined Kasimar.

"Why did you just wedgie me? Why?" Asked Tabitha angrily.

"Because it upsets you, it's funny and you've got a nice ass." Replied Kasimar as though it were obvious.

Tabitha's expression darkened as she left with nothing more than a rude hand gesture directed at the bully.

* * *

**Confessional: Purple is quite a fancy underwear color! :D**

**Tabitha: If Kasimar does anything like that again then I'm not going to try and save him if he doesn't win immunity. He's on strike two … three strikes and he's out! … It's a sports metaphor.**

**Kasimar: It's all good; no harm done. Everyone knows girls love a bad boy, and you can't get much badder than me. **(Kasimar flexes his muscles for the camera). **The girls will come around eventually. Until then I can just slap their asses to hear them squeal. Yahaha!**

* * *

"Attention campers; please report to the mess hall. It isn't quite time for the next challenge but I have something … 'special' that you might like. Haha!" Chuckled Chris over the intercom.

Chris hung up the intercom, oddly with no screw ups and the contestants were left to wonder what Chris wanted them for. Maybe it wasn't anything bad for a change … but knowing Chris the chances of something nice were slim to none.

* * *

**Confessional: I know what else is slim … those models on the front on magazines who sell their souls so they become thin as a match stick!**

**Tabitha: I wonder if the 'special' something is a good meal for a change. I miss eating good food … I'd like something luxurious like a lobster with soup de jour and a side of chicken and sweet corn soup.**

**Eleanor: I bet the special something is just a bucket over the top of the mess hall door. I'll be sure to not be the first in line.**

* * *

A couple of minutes later the six campers were in the mess hall sitting on seats. Chef was setting up a widescreen plasma TV with a DVD player while Chris stood in front of the campers and seemed to be holding something behind his back.

"Hey guys; you may be wondering why I've called you here." Said Chris with a smirk.

"The thought crossed *cough* my mind." Said Spider.

"Well I have two things to announce, not including today's challenge." Said Chris with a mean gleam in his eyes at the word challenge. "First of all; we're in the last stretch of the competition, only five more days including today and the competition will be over. You should be proud for making it this far … even though I am obviously far superior to you all."

"Get on with it." Grunted Kasimar.

"I was getting to it!" Whined Chris immaturely. "Anyway; by a coincidence, each of you received some mail today."

"Are we getting more presents from our friends and family?" Asked Jimmy with a smile.

"Not quite; instead you are all going to watch a video message from your homes." Explained Chris as he revealed six discs from behind his back. "People close to you are going to be saying that they miss you, cheer you on, that kind of bullcrap."

Most contestants looked excited while Tabitha inwardly groaned. She noticed Chris give a reassuring wink to her. Upon seeing that Tabitha relaxed and smiled like the other five campers.

* * *

**Confessional: A video from the outside world!**

**Chris: What the campers don't know is that I told their friends and family to send these videos. I also told them that they couldn't say anything that would spoil the contest such as Tabitha's alliance and past wrong-doings as well as … well … just that really.**

* * *

"Now; to make sure each of the messages is only watched by the intended recipient … you're all going to be waiting outside the mess hall until it's your turn to watch your video." Explained Chris as interns put one way soundproof mirrors over the windows. "Don't try to listen into the video as the mess hall is soundproof."

"Why can't we stay and watch?" Asked Lavender curiously.

"Privacy and crap like that." Shrugged Chris. "Anyway; everyone cue up outside. I'll choose who goes first …

…

…

...

…

…

…

Jimmy."

Jimmy grinned as he took his seat while Chef made the other five contestants leave the mess hall. The doors closed as Jimmy took a seat in front of the TV screen while Chris inserted one of the discs.

* * *

_The video opened to what appeared to be the living room of a mansion. Four ten year old boys were sitting on the couch in front of the camera._

_The first wore a red shirt with a basketball picture, a green headband, dark green shorts and lime green and bright orange shoes. This was Ted_

_The second wore a yellow t-short with some dark blue patches on it. He wore green trousers and brown shoes. This was Pablo._

_The third wore a green shirt with pink sleeves and purple square glasses. His shorts were red and his shoes were black._

_The fourth has spiky red hair; his shirt was sleeveless and grey with a picture of a car tire. His shorts were bright blue and had oil stains on them. This was Ricky_

"_Hey Jimmy; how's it going?" Asked Pablo with a wave. "It's us, your buddies."_

"_I think he knows who we are Pablo; we've known each other since kindergarten." Pointed out Ricky._

"_True … anyway; are we going to say what we rehearsed?" Asked Pablo._

"_Naw! Who cares about the script?" Asked Ted._

"_I do since I wrote it." Said Charles in an affronted tone._

"_That's not the point." Said Ted. "Can we get back no track? We're supposed to be giving Jimmy some congratulations for getting so far."_

"_Good idea." Agreed Charles. "Jimmy; you've done great in the contest so far. Only a few episodes are left until you will pull off a win!"_

"_There is only one last obstacle standing in your way." Mumbled Pablo. "That bully Kasimar. You've got to stand up to him Jimmy; show him you are not afraid of him."_

"_I'm hoping for a battle among the flames like in the lion king." Smirked Ricky. "With Jimmy coming out victorious of course."_

"_We're forgetting the most important detail guys." Said Ted suddenly as a smile grew on his face. "Jimmy's started to __**really**__ like that Eleanor girl."_

"_Yep; isn't that something?" Chuckled Pablo. "I say you go get her Jimmy! After all; who could resist your charms?"_

"_I'd say who can resist mine." Smirked Ted as he flexed his miniature muscles._

"… _A lot of girls could." Said Ricky with a deadpan expression._

"_Well, anyway; we wish you good luck Jimmy! You're really close to winning this whole contest." Said Pablo with a left handed salute._

_The four guys waved to the camera as the video ended._

* * *

**Confessional: When life gives you lemons, make tasty lemonade!**

**Jimmy: Thanks guys; it's great to know I've got support. To be honest I'm surprised I made it this far … but nice people can win these sorts of shows right? (Jimmy laughs to himself). Oh that Ted! He thinks of himself as a ladies man. Maybe Eleanor has a sister … just joking!**

* * *

Kasimar was sitting in front of the widescreen plasma TV after Jimmy left outside as Chris inserted his video message from home in.

"I wonder who sent me my message." Pondered Kasimar. "Maybe it'll be from Ian and Omar."

The video message began and Kasimar put his hands behind his head and relaxed.

* * *

_Two seventeen year olds were leaning against a wall in what looked to be an alley in a rundown part of town. One was slightly muscular and twitchy while the other was kind of obese and had an unpleasant look on his face. At their feet was a sack wit something in it._

"_Yo Kasimar; how ya doin ma man." Asked the twitchy teen, Ian, in a casual voice. "Congrats for gettin so far in da contest dude. Soon you'll be rich enough to buy plastic explosive and blow up da hospital."_

"_Exactly; I'd love to see those sick cripples on fire." Agreed the fat guy, Omar, in a slightly nasally voice. "What has the hospital ever done for the healthy people like myself?"_

"_A possible fat suction, dude." Said Ian with a raised eyebrow._

"_Details, details." Grunted Omar in a bored tone. "But soon we can really wreck havoc across town. Our gang the Barbarous Scorpions will recruit new members once you, our leader, become richer than Elton John and more super powered than Bill Gates."_

"_Bill Gates ain't a super hero; he's just got lot'sa money." Said Ian with a run of his hands. "But its true; win that money Kasimar my man, and we'll be able to do anything we want. Is there anything ya can't buy with money?"_

"_Not happiness; you can buy that." Smirked Omar. "Just a few more of those weak runts to beat. And also; good job allying with that hot rich chick."_

"_She's smoking, ma man." Said Ian also with a nasty smirk._

"_She probably has the tightest-"_

"_Be serious dude." Frowned Ian. "Kasimar ain't not got no time for no dating never not never!"_

"… _You could be a Grammar Nazi's worst nightmare." Said Omar with a raised eyebrow._

"_Whatever fatso." Shrugged Ian. "Keep going as you are Kasimar. Bring home the prize and try and destroy somebody as well."_

"_Destroy." Agreed Omar._

* * *

**Confessional: … I'm feeling somewhat concerned about my own safety is teenagers nowadays are like **_**that**_**.**

**Kasimar: When I win the money and get back home I think the first thing I'll do is blow up the school. Hopefully while the younger students are in it. I'm sure Ian and Omar will think it's funny … which, quite frankly, it is. Yahahaha!**

* * *

After Kasimar left the mess hall Spider entered. Chris inserted his video message into the DVD player and pressed play.

* * *

_A middle aged couple who looked to in their early to mid forties sat on a sofa in the living room of a suburban house. On the wall above the sofa were a trip of portraits, they seemed to be abstract art of some description. The man was wearing a doctor's outfit while his wife was wearing a colorful dress with one or two splats of paint on it._

"_Hey Spider." Said the women with a wave and a smile. "It's your mum and dad."_

"_We miss you son; it's been different without you being here." Said Spider's dad a wistful look. "At first I was worried that the other contestants would vote you off due to your illness … but I'm glad I was wrong! You've gotten so far in this contest, you may even win!"_

"_A million dollars sure would be a good sum of money." Agreed Spider's mum. "I bet we could afford the treatment to get you cured."_

"_If I wasn't an Oncologist then I would have specialized in whatever medical field would be needed to make you better." Said Spider's dad with a small tone of regret before smiling. "But you seem to be getting on in the contest just fine!"_

"_And let's not forget that our boy's got a lady now." Grinned Spider's mum with an excited look. "I'd really like to meet Quana."_

"_I'm sure she'll be visiting sometime after the show." Nodded Spider's dad. "I'd like to personally thank Barney for helping make it happen."_

_Spider's mum and dad shared a good natured laugh and Spider's mum suddenly had a very proud look on her smiling face._

"_Just before we began making this video we saw the latest episode. I … have never been more proud of you. You truly stood up to that awful Nakia girl; that was very brave of you." Said Spider's mum admiringly. "When I saw that steel pipe she had I thought I was going to have a heart attack."_

"_Don't worry dear." Smiled Spider's dad. "Our boys in the final six; I see no reason why he can't go all the way."_

"_We'll be cheering for you Spider every step of the way; win or lose we're proud of you." Whispered Spider's mum._

"_We'll be shipping this message in first class; hopefully it'll arrive before the next challenge." Said Spider's dad. "Enjoy the rest of the competition Spider!"_

_Spider's mum and dad waved as the video ended._

* * *

**Confessional: Family moment!**

**Spider: **(He is smiling). **That was nice; mum and ***cough* **dad are always there for me. Maybe I ***cough* **could win. But first I would have to defeat ***cough* **Kasimar. **(Spider gulps).

* * *

Once Spider had left the room Eleanor was bought in. As she sat down on a chair Chris put the fourth video message into the DVD player.

* * *

_Sitting on the sofa in the living room of a green wall papered room was a man and women. Both seemed in their late thirties or early forties. Both of them had blond hair like their daughter._

"_Hello Eleanor dear; we're just sending you a video message to give you some encouragement and also to say that we're proud of you." Said Eleanor's dad._

"_We're looking forward to when you come home so that you can tell us everything that didn't make it onto the air." Smiled Eleanor's mum excitedly. "We're glad that you've gotten so far and made so many friends."_

"_And we can't forget the fact that Dandelion has had her litter." Added Eleanor's dad. "Just so you know Eleanor; it's going to be a big responsibility now that you've got three baby ferrets to care for as well as Frost and Dandelion."_

"_Don't worry Mark; Eleanor is great with animals." Assured Eleanor's mum. "A lot better than Cruella De Vil."_

"_I always enjoyed that movie Sherry." Smiled Mark. "Maybe if Eleanor wins the million we can go on holiday to Africa."_

"_I bet you'd like to see the giraffes, right Eleanor?" Asked Sherry to the camera._

"_Our Eleanor would like to see __**any**__ animal." Chuckled Mark. "Good luck in the rest of the competition Eleanor. We expect you to make the final five at least. But most importantly; have fun!"_

"_Ands have a totally dramatic summer." Added Sherry._

_Eleanor's parents waved to the camera as the video came to an end._

* * *

**Confessional: I'll have a glass of sherry as I'm a drunken marksman! *rimshot***

**Eleanor: I miss my mum and daddy; I've never really been away from them for this long. I sure am glad I bought Frost and Dandelion with me or I might have gone into a 'home withdrawal'.**

* * *

After Eleanor's home message was over Eleanor left the mess hall and Lavender entered. As she took a seat Chris put her message into the DVD player.

"If we're lucky it'll be a hate message." Sneered Chris.

"Hmm; you have been receiving lots of them lately haven't you?" Smirked Lavender.

"…Shut up!" Whined Chris as he stomped his feet in temper.

* * *

_The video opened to the sports pitch of a high school. Two cheerleaders were standing in front of the camera. One had the number three on her shirt while the other had a number 8. Both of them had black hair._

"_How are you doing Lavender?" Asked the first of the cheerleaders, Kat. "It's us, your friends, Kat and Susan. We just want to congratulate you on getting so far in the contest and proving cheerleaders don't have to be stupid."_

"_And also for hooking up with a pirate and kissing a girl." Grinned the other cheerleader, Susan. "Seriously; that'll be one for the yearbook!"_

"_Be serious Susan; we can tease Lavender when she gets back." Said Kat. "Anyway Lavender; you've done great so far. The way you knocked Kasimar unconscious in the cooking challenge was priceless. It was about time somebody stood up to that monster."_

"_He's such a monster he makes zombies seem almost human." Agreed Susan. "It's been different without you to hang out with. But just a couple more episodes and the world will see you win a million dollars!"_

"_And maybe you'll buy us something … just joking." Giggled Kat._

"_We wish all the best for you in the upcoming episodes and we look forward to seeing you again … hopefully when you're a million dollars richer!" Grinned Susan._

"_See ya Lavender! Kick Kasimar's butt!" Cheered Kat._

_Kat and Susan waved as the video message ended._

* * *

**Confessional: Give me a C! Give me an O! Give me an N! Give me a FESSIONAL! What have we got? Confessional!**

**Lavender: I am looking forward to seeing my friends again. **(Lavender puts her head into her hand). **I'm also dreading it due to the amount of embarrassing things that have happened to me.**

* * *

Lavender left the mess hall and Tabitha entered. As she took a seat Chris inserted the final video message into the DVD player.

* * *

_A middle aged couple was sitting on an expensive sofa in what seemed to be the living room of a mansion. Everything in the room looked expensive and regal to some degree. It was clear that Tabitha hadn't been lying when she said that she was from a rich family._

"_Greetings Tabitha; you've done very well in this contest so far." Said Tabitha's mum. "But then again; I wouldn't expect anything less of you since all of your competition is either freaks or inbred white trash."_

"_I'm very impressed with how easily you've dealt with any problems you've encountered." Said Tabitha's dad with the smallest possible smile. "It was a smart move to get rid of that fat intellectual before he became a problem just as it was to ally with that blond freak. Just remember that you'll have to backstab your remaining allies at some point as only one person can win … I'd do hope that person will be you."_

"_Using an opponent's weakness against them is always the best way to achieve success; it's good to see that you are following our advice that most successful people use in everyday life." Chuckled Tabitha's mum. "Giving the sick guy an allergic reaction and blackmailing the others into obedience was remarkably clever."_

"_I think it is clear that in just a few days our family will be a million dollars richer." Smirked Tabitha's dad confidently._

"_We may already have billions of dollars but another million wouldn't hurt." Smiled Tabitha's mum to her husband._

"_We look forward to seeing you win as you almost always do." Said Tabitha's nod with a polite nod._

"_Just don't fail, ok Tabitha?" Said Tabitha's mum. "Enjoy the rest of the competition and crush your opponents."_

_Tabitha's mum and dad gave small smiles for the camera as the video ended._

* * *

**Confessional: Aristocrats are evil.**

**Tabitha: They may be demanding … but they're still my mum and dad. And don't worry mum and dad; I plan on winning this competition.**

* * *

Chris ejected Tabitha's video message out of the DVD player; a few seconds later the other five contestants entered the mess hall as the sound proof mirrors were removed from the windows. It was clear none of them had heard even the smallest little bit of Tabitha's message.

"And that's that." Said Chris as he put the DVD's in his back pocket. "I bet it was nice to have people cheer you on during these late parts of the season … if so I'm disappointed! Misery builds character and happiness is bad for ratings!"

"Speaking of ratings … I rate you a zero." Frowned Lavender.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "Anyway; we have no time to waste as it's time for your twenty fourth challenge. Some of you may enjoy this one … others might be scared. All I can say is that is might be the hardest challenge of the season. Follow me to the north of camp and I'll explain more."

* * *

**Confessional: The hardest challenge? Even harder than **

**Spider: … I've got a bad feeling about ***cough* **this challenge.**

* * *

The campers were gathered in a clearing a little to the north of Camp Wawanakwa. In front of them was a large and very high tech machine with the word V.R.E.G on it. It also had six seats inside capsules around it.

"So; what do you think?" Asked Chris as he idly admired his hand.

"… What is it?" Asked Eleanor as she looked at the shiny machine.

"Well you naïve fool; it is called the V.R.E.G." Explained Chris. "That stands for 'Virtual Reality Environment Generator'; we're going to be using for today's challenge."

"A virtual reality challenge? Cool!" Grinned Jimmy. "So; is it going to be like exploring the moon or something?"

"…WRONG!" Yelled Chris. "You couldn't be further from the correct answer."

"So what is the challenge?" Grunted Kasimar.

"I'm glad you asked Kasimar; today's challenge is going to be based on a video game series." Grinned Chris with a sudden sadistic expression. "And that series is called…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Silent Hill!"

"Yes! Thank you!" Cheered Kasimar with a look of delight … it was actually kind of scary to see him smiling.

"Yep; today's challenge is going to be about monsters." Chuckled Chris. "Each of you will be put in one of those capsules and will enter the virtual world. All I can tell you as a hint is that you will be in a factory."

"I'm guessing this is like a last man standing type of thing then?" Guessed Kasimar.

"Correctamundo Kasimar!" Nodded Chris. "One of the conditions for winning is to be the last person left in the challenge."

"So what are the other conditions?" Asked Lavender.

"I'm getting to that! Besides eliminating the opposition the alternative method for winning is to simply survive the longest. If multiple people survive then whoever killed the most monsters will receive immunity."

"I dread to ask … but *cough* what sort of monsters are there?" Asked Spider with a gulp.

"You know, stuff like Grey Children, Amnion, Pyramid Head and a number of monsters that I simply made up." Grinned Chris. "To defend yourself you are each going to be given a random weapon upon entering the virtual reality world. But you can find other weapons to defend yourself with.

* * *

**Confessional: Hill's don't make much noise! That's why they are Silent!**

**Tabitha: Amnion … now why does that sound familiar?**

* * *

"Will we feel pain?" Asked Eleanor nervously.

"Sadly you will not; whenever you are attacked you won't feel pain but you'll feel a small bit of pressure on the place you were attacked. If you are hit too many times then you'll evaporate into pixels and you'll be bought back to the real world."

"Can we attack each other?" Asked Kasimar in a cruel hopeful tone.

"Absolutely! Shoot or bludgeon each other as much as you want! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Anyway; those are basically all the rules and things you will need to know."

"But none of us have handled a gun before! How will we know how to reload them?" Asked Lavender skeptically.

"Harry Mason hadn't used guns before and he knew how. You'll figure it out" Smirked Chris. "Plus your suffering really amuses me! Haha! Anyway; everyone into a pod and let's get this challenge started!"

The contestants, some of them reluctulently, got into the pods as some interns strapped them in properly. The pods soon closed as another intern activated the machine. While the contestants began to exit reality and enter the virtual world Chris turned to the camera.

"And so the challenge begins!" Said Chris while making grand gestures with his arms. "Will Kasimar win immunity like I expect he will? Will Eleanor and Jimmy cry like little babies? What monsters will the six campers face? And who will be voted off at what I hope will be the most dramatic Bonfire Ceremony yet? Find out after the break on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

I think it goes without saying … but the next chapter is going to be really dramatic. Lot's of shocking things will happen. The elimination will be perhaps THE most shocking of the whole story. I hope you look forward to it because I'm looking forward to writing it.


	52. Day 24, Part 2, Silent Wawanakwa

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. And while I'm at it; I do not own Silent Hill either. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you,

**The Warning: **This chapter contains monsters, fire, weapons, something atrocious, a shocking elimination, some manipulation and a Complete Monster. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Poll: **Vote for who you want to win Total Drama Letterz out of the final five. However; looking at the poll before reading this chapter will spoil who is voted off, just a fair warning there.

**Note: **I've been writing this chapter for hours! I don't really have much to say other than to read because this one is exciting! Enjoy the chapter everyone!

Countdown to the end

* * *

Spider opened his eyes and looked around; he was no longer sitting in the V.R.E.G; instead he was in the assembly line room of a factory. Conveyer belts were moving dead bodies of NPC's along towards the furnace. Spider noticed that he was holding a steel pipe, like the one Nakia had tried to attack him with the previous day. Spider suddenly realized how dark the area around him was; he then remembered Chris saying there would be monsters in this virtual world. In just a moment Spider was trembling as he started to slowly walk along while looking nervously around for any monsters.

"I am so totally *cough* scared right now." Gulped Spider. "I just … just gotta think … think some happy thoughts."

Spider started to walk alongside the conveyer belt machine in search of one of the others; even if it was a virtual reality he didn't want to hurt any of them. Killing more monsters sounded like a much better way to win … then again Spider had no idea what to expect the monsters to be like as he had never played Silent Hill. All he knew was that it was apparently the scariest game series in the world.

As Spider rounded a corner he saw a compressing machine that was on fire.

"I wonder what set it *cough* alight … I hope Kasimar didn't receive a *sneeze* flame thrower." Murmured Spider.

CRASH!

Just a second after Spider stopped speaking a vent on the machine, possibly put there for cooling reasons, was smashed away and what looked like a hunched over reptilian monkey set on fire leapt out. He let out a monstrous shriek as is looked at Spider with soulless eyes.

"AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Spider as he leapt about four feet in the air in panic.

The monster leapt at Spider; Spider whacked its face with his pipe by reflex. The monster staggered a little having just had five of its sharp teeth knocked out. Spider smashed it in the face with the pipe a second time. The monster recovered quickly and head butted Spider with a lot of force into the wall though Spider didn't seem to have taken any damage at all.

"What _is_ that *cough* thing?" Asked Spider aloud.

The monster reared back on its stooped legs; it leapt at Spider for the killing blow.

BANG!

Just before the monster could slash Spider with its claws a bullet was fired from within the darkness and hit the monster in the head. It flopped to the ground and twitched before it died and lay still.

Spider clutched his heart and breathed out an immense sigh of relief. Out of the shadows walked Lavender holding a magnum revolver.

"Are you ok Spider?" Asked Lavender as she helped Spider to his feet.

"… Other than being completely scared out of *cough* my mind I feel fine." Said Spider after a few seconds of silence.

"This challenge gives me the creeps too." Agreed Lavender. "I've already killed a couple of preschooler sized grey monsters. They tried to stab me with knives!"

"I think we should stick *cough* together." Suggested Spider as he held clutched his steel pipe tightly. "If that monster went down so … quickly, then I don't even *cough* want to _know_ what the strongest *cough* monsters are like."

"Then it's settled; but word of advice Spider, do not go into the dark rooms." Advised Lavender. "You may not be able to see in the dark … but that's not to say the monsters can't either."

"… Got it." Gulped Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Until further notice I'm arming myself with a rifle! I don't want to take any chances with zombie termites as I am made out of wood!**

**Spider: I scare kind of easy; I could ***cough* **sense the fear around me throughout the challenge. I don't** *sneeze*** know how Lavender kept so calm … she's a braver person than me. I feel ***cough* **like Luigi in the game Luigi's mansion.**

**Lavender: Truth be told I was kinda scared … but I just kept telling myself that it wasn't real. I've also played Resident Evil 3 before so I sort of had an idea of what to expect … how different could Resident Evil and Silent Hill be right?**

**Chris: A lot different! Haha!**

* * *

Jimmy held his handgun out in front of him; it looked like the Blacktail from Resident Evil 4. Jimmy was walking around the storage area of the factory; it was full of crates and Jimmy was praying that nothing was going to jump out of the crates and try to attack him.

"Just relax Jimmy; nothing can hurt you, it isn't real." Said Jimmy to assure himself. "Just like every nightmare there will be an end to all this. Just think of something nice."

Jimmy thought of his crush, Eleanor. He thought of her cute giggle and sweet smile that always cheered him up. Jimmy started to feel a little better.

"Jimmy … is that you?" Asked a voice from nearby.

Jimmy turned and saw Eleanor walking up to him. She looked a little shaky and it was clear that she wasn't enjoying the challenge very much at all.

"Hey Eleanor; are you ok?" Asked Jimmy.

"Not really; I keep hearing groans and hisses from the darkness and I saw a muscular human looking monster a few minutes ago with a triangularish pyramid shaped helmet." Mumbled Eleanor. "I don't cope with horror movies very well; I wonder how Uzuri can stand them."

"Everybody's different Eleanor. Would you like it if I stayed here with you?" Asked Jimmy while hoping she would say yes as Jimmy was pretty unnerved as well.

"Yes; I'd like that." Smiled Eleanor.

"So … what weapon do you have?" Asked Jimmy. "Is it one of those one hit kill weapons people don't like being used in online play?"

"I don't think so." Said Eleanor as she took out a Uzi. "It's a machine gun … I just hope I don't run out of ammo."

"There should be some extra ammo around here somewhere." Assured Jimmy. "Chris wouldn't make us take on the monsters with our bare hands would he?"

**Confessional: He would.**

* * *

**Chris: I so would! Seeing children get hurt is hilarious! Haha!**

* * *

Eleanor suddenly heard a flapping sound; it sounded a little like loud butterfly wings. She looked up and her aqua blue eyes widened.

"Jimmy…" Gulped Eleanor as she trailed off.

Jimmy looked up and let out a scared 'eep'. Flying down towards them from the ceiling high above was what looked like a giant grey and black butterfly with a long needle stinger that seemed like to could piece through metal.

"Err … shoot it!" Yelled Eleanor as she started to unload a stream of bullets into the giant butterfly; it barely seemed to flinch as bullets pierced into its gut.

"Aim for the wings!" Advised Jimmy. "If it has holes in the wings it won't be able to fly!"

Jimmy started to shoot his handgun at the wings of the butterfly of winged death. Jimmy felt the recoil from the gun. He noticed the butterfly had lowered mostly to the ground ahead of them and seemed to be lining up for charge, stinger first. That's when Jimmy noticed a barrel of fuel next to it.

"Eleanor! Shoot a bullet at the barrel! Quick!" Said Jimmy as he shivered at the sight of the ugly bleeding butterfly.

Eleanor obeyed and blasted a single bullet at the fuel barrel.

BOOM!

The barrel exploded and the monstrous butterfly was set on fire. In an instant its wings had disintegrated and in just a few seconds after that the butterfly burned to death.

"I … think its dead." Said Jimmy. "We should keep moving or more monsters are going to find us."

"Good idea; I don't want to become kibble for monster dogs." Shivered Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: Kibble is a type of dog food isn't it?**

**Eleanor: I'm suddenly liking butterflies less than I did before…**

**Jimmy: I probably shouldn't say this … but Eleanor is kind id cute when she's scared … but even so I don't like seeing her scared. It's not a very nice emotion to feel.**

* * *

"Eat lead ya #bleep# baby monsters! Yahahahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in sadistic delight as he mowed into a hoard of faceless grey monsters with his rocket launcher. He had actually started with a sniper rifle but he, by luck, had beaten a monster that had a rocket launcher strapped to it. Kasimar didn't care why, he was delighted that he had a new weapon to wreck havoc with.

As Kasimar smashed a lone remaining monster with the heavy rocket launcher he heard the sound of walking near him. He quickly loaded a rocket and aimed at the source of the noise.

"Don't shoot!" Said Tabitha as she held up her hands in surrender. "It's just me!"

Kasimar lowered his weapon and noticed Tabitha had a shotgun.

"Looks like you've been very busy." Noted Tabitha as she looked over the large amount of dead monsters. "I think it's safe to say you'll win immunity if more than one person is left standing."

"True … but I'd like to be certain I'm the only one." Said Kasimar with a sinister grin. "Do you know where the others are? I'd like to kill them."

"You mean only in the virtual world right?" Asked Tabitha hesitantly.

"…Yeah; let's go with that." Shrugged Kasimar. "Anyway; have you seen Jimmy or Eleanor; I'd like to blow them to bits."

"I haven't seen anyone besides you." Said Tabitha honestly.

"Fair enough." Shrugged Kasimar before he suddenly seemed to have noticed something above them but managed to not show this on his face. "I'd better be off; monsters to kill, victims to slay and all that."

Kasimar sped off and entered a door out of the crane room to somewhere else and Tabitha was alone in the dark.

"I wonder how I can kill one of the others without it looking suspicious." Mumbled Tabitha with a flinch. "Talking about killing, real or not, is kind of unnerving."

Tabitha suddenly heard what sounded like a metallic ricochet behind her. She pumped her shotgun and turned to face whatever it was … and all color left her face.

* * *

**Confessional: Uzuri was right; she indeed was scared of Amnion when she met him.**

**Tabitha: **(She has her knees hunched up and looks kind of scared). **I'm sleeping with the light on tonight. **(Tabitha shudders).

**Kasimar: I could have easily dealt with the monster with my rocket launcher; but I needed everyone else out of the game and if I shot Tabitha she'd break off the alliance once the challenge was over. I made it all seem like coincidence. See; I can be clever when I need to be. **(Kasimar winks nastily and laughs).

* * *

Tabitha stood frozen to the spot as she looked at the horrific monster in front of her.

It looked like a bloated heavily pregnant women with a corn going from its mouth to its crotch. It had no arms but rather six mechanical limbs coming from its ribcage that made it resemble a spider. Its face looked like a sort of mask … but it was able to stretch into 'layers' like an old fashioned camera. The whole body looked waterlogged as though it had drowned.

Tabitha let out a scream of fright and blasted the monster with her shotgun; the monster flinched a little but reared back and slammed its legs at Tabitha which knocked her to the ground and almost eliminated her from the game in one hit. As Tabitha tried to get back to her feet the monster spewed acid from its mouth; Tabitha was doused in it and evaporated into many purple and yellow pixels.

* * *

**Confessional: In reality that enemy isn't such a hard boss.**

**Tabitha: … If that is from the games Uzuri likes I shudder to imagine what goes on inside her head. She's crazy!**

**Chris: Haha! Priceless comedy!**

* * *

Back in the real world the pod of the V.R.E.G that Tabitha was in opened and the rich girl shakily walked out, her blue eyes wide. She saw Chris standing nearby laughing his ass off at her suffering. Tabitha frowned and Chris soon stopped laughing.

"Looks like you're out Tabitha." Smirked Chris. "Amnion totally wiped the floor with you! Haha!"

"It's not funny! I honestly thought I was going to have a heart attack!" Snarled Tabitha.

"But you didn't so it's ok for me to laugh at your misfortune." Said Chris smugly. "Care to watch the rest of the challenge?"

"No; I'm going to have a lie down. I need to clear my head." Mumbled Tabitha as she walked off towards her cabin. "I'm never going to look at spiders the same way again."

"Technically it was bio-mechanical and thus isn't real." Smirked Chris condescendingly.

"… Not helping." Said Tabitha flatly.

* * *

**Confessional: Lend a helping hand!**

**Tabitha: I'm actually kind of relieved that I was eliminated early from the challenge. Now I can just relax; I'm pretty sure I'll be safe from elimination anyway.**

* * *

Spider and Lavender were walking along some raised walkways above the assembly line; their were less monsters up here and they could easily see them before they got anywhere close to them in order to harm them. Spider still felt uneasy despite the fact he was no longer alone.

"Something on your mind Spider?" Asked Lavender sounding concerned. "You look tense."

"It's nothing Lavender; *cough* I'm fine." Assured Spider even though he wasn't.

"Are you sure? You seem kind of afraid." Said Lavender with a kind look on her face.

Spider remained silent in response to this so Lavender continued.

"There is absolutely _**no**_ shame in being scared you know. The monsters and general atmosphere in this challenge are all very frightening." Said Lavender nicely.

"But it's not real … and *cough* yet that doesn't make me feel any better." Mumbled Spider.

"If it's any consolation I'm a little scared too." Mumbled Lavender.

"So how are you staying *cough* calm?" Asked Spider curiously.

"Because I'm thinking of Barney." Explained Lavender. "His reassuring hugs, his wild blond hair … his handsome face, his small amount of muscles … mmm, muscles."

Lavender trailed off and suddenly realized what she was saying and blushed.

"Err … sorry about that; I sometimes ramble." Giggled Lavender.

"No problem; and you know, I *cough* think you've given me an *sneeze* idea." Said Spider with a calmer tone of voice than he previously had a few moments prior. "I'll just think of *cough* Quana."

* * *

**Confessional: And I'll think of the dressing room; now **_**there's**_** a hottie hot hottie! Rawr!**

**Lavender: I really miss you Barney; this competition just isn't as funny without you here to make me smile in mirth.**

**Spider: One of the hardest tasks somebody ***cough*** can undertake is being brave. It takes a lot of ***sneeze* **bravery … ok, that sounded a little silly.**

* * *

While Spider began to think of his girlfriend somebody on the other side of the huge assembly line room was loading a clip into their sniper rifle.

"See ya in hell Bug and Bitch." Grinned Kasimar as he rested his sniper rifle on the railings of the walkway and peered into the sniper scope as he rested his finger on the trigger and began to aim his shot.

* * *

**Confessional: Sniper Piper!**

**Kasimar: I'm going to **_**enjoy**_** this!**

* * *

"I haven't seen any monsters in a while." Noted Lavender. "That's a bad sine … they might be waiting to jump out on us."

"Why couldn't I *cough* have had a gun instead of a steel *gag* pipe?" Asked Spider as he looked at his melee weapon. "It seems kinda unfair."

"At least you don't have to worry about running out of ammunition." Pointed out Lavender. "I wonder what we're supposed to do when we possibly run out of ammo anyway; it seems like it'd be a game o-"

BANG!

Lavender evaporated into red, orange and blue pixels as a high caliber rifle bullet was embedded into the wall behind her. Spider felt the color leave his face; he noticed somebody at the other side of the large room … somebody with a blue Mohawk.

"Oh crap, it's *cough* Kasimar!" Gulped Spider as he took off running along the walkway; he would have picked up Lavender's gun but it had disappeared when Lavender had been eliminated.

Kasimar fired another shot; it missed Spider by less than a tenth of an inch. Spider ran through an open door at the other side of the walkway and escaped Kasimar, at least for a while.

"Aw #bleep#; he got away." Grumbled Kasimar in disappointment. "And Lavender didn't even splatter blood everywhere; she just evaporated! Is this rated PG or some #bleep# like that?"

* * *

**Confessional: Well this Fanfic is, and always has been, rated T so blood like **_**that**_** would be a bit on the extreme side…**

**Kasimar: Well; at least I got one of them. Bug won't get far by himself. Unfortunately I'm nearly out of sniper rifle ammo and I've got two rockets left. But since Tabitha and Lavender are gone I only need three direct hits and I win … so, yeah.**

**Lavender: Just when I thought Kasimar couldn't get any lower … he starts **_**CAMPING**_**! That is completely inexcusable behavior!**

**Spider: … I'm alone in the ***cough*** dark … it doesn't feel very ***cough*** nice.**

**Chris: In case you were wondering, the V.R.E.G does have a blood option … but I was forbidden from turning it on! This show is called '**_**total drama**_**' for a reason you know! Yeesh!**

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor had left the storage area and were now in an office room; one that overlooked some molten metal pits below them. It was clear that falling into the molten metal, or even touching it, would spell an instant game over in capital letters.

"I'm glad this room has lights." Said Jimmy as he looked down at the monsters below them which hadn't noticed them. "It's like one of the save rooms in most horror games where the enemies can't hurt you."

* * *

**Confessional: You're safe … for now.**

**Chris: Except that room they are in isn't a safe room! None of them are actually.**

* * *

"I hope you're right; this challenge isn't really my idea of fun." Lamented Eleanor. "Why couldn't it have been something like taking care of an animal?"

"Probably because Chris hates to give us an easy time." Guessed Jimmy. "I wonder how he was able to achieve the position of host anyway?"

"Maybe he used blackmail … or maybe he was just the best person for the job." Pondered Eleanor. "Say … do you hear something?"

Jimmy listened and heard the sound of heavy footsteps, too heavy to be another camper. He could also hear the sound of a blade being dragged along the ground.

"…Oh my." Said Eleanor with a tremble.

Jimmy looked to the door and paled a little.

Standing in the doorway and looking soullessly at them was a large monster that looked like a human. In one hand it held a large blade and it was wearing a helmet that was shaped like a pyramid.

* * *

**Confessional: What's up ya'll? Pyramid head's in the house!**

**Eleanor: … Now I know why Silent Hill is said to be scarier than resident evil.**

**Jimmy: That monster looked pretty powerful … and my only weapon was a handgun. Thankfully the monster didn't seem to be very bright.**

* * *

Pyramid head started to slowly walk towards Jimmy and Eleanor while dragging its giant blade weapon behind it along the ground. Eleanor quickly opened fire with her Uzi and Jimmy fired at the monster with his handgun but their weapons didn't seem to do much damage. Pyramid head reared its blade back and prepared to swing it.

Jimmy and Eleanor leapt to the side and the blade smashed against the ground which created a few sparks. While Eleanor backed away from the monster Jimmy noticed the control panel for the machines below was flickering with electricity, as though it was short circuiting. Jimmy knew metal conducted electricity, and since Pyramid Head's blade and helmet were both metal and this gave him an idea.

Jimmy immediately saw that Pyramid Head had cornered Eleanor.

"Jimmy! Help!" Screamed Eleanor.

Jimmy picked up a brick from the floor and hurled it at the back of Pyramid head's helmet. It made a 'clang' sound and Pyramid head turned away from Eleanor to face Jimmy.

"Leave her alone pointy head!" Said Jimmy while trying to look intimidating … which he was failing at.

The monster ambled towards Jimmy though the ten year old didn't move. Pyramid head stopped and raised his blade.

At the last possible moment Jimmy leapt to the side and Pyramid Head's metal blade struck into the control panel.

ZAP!

Electricity surged throughout Pyramid Head for about ten or eleven seconds. After that the monster dropped to its knees and then fell on its side dead. Eleanor let out an immense sigh of relief and so did Jimmy.

"Good thinking Jimmy." Congratulated Eleanor. "I think you just saved us both … from being eliminated that is, this isn't real or anything."

"Even so it's pretty scary." Said Jimmy as he loaded another clip into his handgun. "Funnily enough things that aren't real are often more scary than things that are."

"That's very true; Ronald McDonald always gave me the creeps." Agreed Eleanor. "I can't really explain that. So … where should we go now?"

"I'm not sure … but anywhere is better than hear; more monsters might be on their way." Mumbled Jimmy.

"Hmm … got it! How about we head to the roof. It might be safer up there." Suggested Eleanor.

"Good idea; we'd better get going." Nodded Jimmy. "…Which way is the roof?"

"That way; according to the sign." Said Eleanor as she gestured to a sign that had the words 'roof this way' on it.

As Jimmy and Eleanor headed towards the roof they didn't know that somebody else was on their way there too … a certain somebody with a blue Mohawk.

* * *

**Confessional: Roof's aren't always safe; remember the final boss of Luigi's Mansion?**

**Jimmy: You know; we have to be thankful for one thing; throughout this whole challenge we haven't come across Kasimar. I doubt he'd go easy on us.**

**Eleanor: I wonder how the others are doing. Kasimar I couldn't care less about, just like everyone else … but I'm concerned for the safety of my friends. I know none of this is real … but it sure is creepy…**

* * *

Spider nervously walked up some stairs towards goodness knows where. He was kind of lost and hadn't seen anyone else ever since Lavender had been eliminated from the challenge.

"This challenge is freaking *cough* me out." Mumbled Spider as he held his steel pipe at the ready in case a monster jumped out at him. "How much longer is *sneeze* it going to last?"

* * *

**Confessional: As long as the plot requires it to.**

**Spider: On the plus side I hadn't seen any ***cough* **monsters in a while. On the ***cough* **downside that made me feel kind of paranoid.**

* * *

As Spider reached the top of the stairs a bullet narrowly missed him. Spider looked in the direction that the bullet had come from and shivered a little. Kasimar was standing nearby holding his sniper rifle.

"Well that was a waste of a bullet." Grumbled Kasimar.

"Keep away! I'm … sorta *cough* armed!" Threatened Spider in a way that wasn't very threatening at all.

"You don't scare me." Said Kasimar sinisterly. "Still; I'm down to one rifle bullet; and I might need that later … so I guess I'll just blow you to kingdom come with my rocket launcher."

Before Spider could react Kasimar took out his rocket launcher and fired a rocket out. It missed Spider by a couple of inches and exploded at the other end of the hall.

"Gaaaah! Why do I keep missing?" Roared Kasimar. As he loaded another rocket.

"Don't even try it *cough* Kasimar." Said Spider bravely. "I might dodge this one as well *cough* and then you'll be just about out of *sneeze* ammo!"

"Who says I'm going to aim at you?" Asked Kasimar smugly.

Before Spider could ponder on what Kasimar meant Kasimar fired his final rocket at the ceiling above Spider. Before Spider could run the ceiling collapsed down on him and Spider was crushed beneath the wreckage like a bug.

As some reddish brown, orange and blue pixels evaporated into the air from beneath the wreckage Kasimar laughed.

"Yahahahahaha! Classic! His name is Spider and he was squished like a spider as well! Totally priceless! Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar sadistically.

Kasimar continued towards his destination, the roof, while feeling content that he had eliminated three people out of his opposition of five. Only the two kids remained to eliminate.

* * *

**Confessional: Was it really as priceless as a Ming Vase? I think not.**

**Spider: I should have seen that ***cough* **coming. Still; even though I can't win ***cough* **immunity now it feels like a great weight has been ***cough* **lifted from my shoulders.**

**Lavender: Seriously; does Kasimar have even the smallest trace of goodness in him?**

**Kasimar: Anybody want to here some hilarious dead baby jokes? They're funny because people suffer!**

* * *

Spider's pod on the V.R.E.G opened. He stepped out and breathed a big sigh of relief that he was out of the challenge.

"So Kasimar got you as well huh?" Said Lavender as she walked up to Spider. "You were doing pretty good as well."

"Thanks; but I don't think I'm in *cough* much danger of being voted off." Shrugged Spider. "And after that challenge I *cough* feel more pale than usual."

"I find it highly unfair that Kasimar got the best weapons and you only got a pipe." Said Lavender while casting an irritable glance over at Chris. "

"So who's left in the *cough* challenge?" Asked Spider. "I know Kasimar is but *sneeze* as for everyone else I'm not *cough* sure."

"Jimmy, Kasimar and Eleanor are still in the game." Answered Lavender promptly. "Tabitha was eliminated before us by a sort of bio-mechanical spider thing according to Chris."

"Oh dear … it's just Kasimar VS Jimmy *cough* and Eleanor … I don't think it is in Kasimar's nature to *cough* show mercy." Mumbled Spider nervously.

"He is what's known as a sadistic sociopath … the _worst_ type of human there is." Said Lavender uneasily. "Sometimes I wonder if he's a demon instead of human."

* * *

**Confessional: Forget demon; more like the ARCH demon.**

**Lavender: If Kasimar wins immunity again I don't know what I'll do.**

**Chris: I know what I'll do … I'll laugh at the anger of the contestants and fans! Haha!**

* * *

About an hour after they had defeated Pyramid head jimmy and Eleanor had nearly reached the roof of the large factory. It would have been quicker but they had encountered a number of monsters along the way. They were currently walking up the stairs that led directly to the roof of the factory.

"What do we do when we get to the roof?" Asked Eleanor as she nervously looked around in case a monster tried to jump out at her or Jimmy.

"Just sit tight and wait until the challenge ends I suppose." Said Jimmy. "For all we know we could be the only people left in the challenge; it'd be nice if it ended up as a tie and we both won immunity."

"That'd would be nice; but I doubt Chris would allow it; he's not really known for his generosity." Mumbled Eleanor.

"Well, I guess that's true ... but it never hurts to be optimistic and see the silver lining." Smiled Jimmy. "Sometimes in order for there to be a silver lining, first there must be cloud."

* * *

**Confessional: Every cloud is silver lined even when it rains.**

**Eleanor: I really like how Jimmy can always find reason to smile; it's a very admirable quality. **(Eleanor smiles).

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor reached the top of the stairs and set foot onto the roof of the factory; little did they know however that somebody had spotted them and was aiming his sniper rifle at one of them.

"I don't see any monsters up here." Said Eleanor as he looked around the area with her eyes. "I think we'll be safe up here."

"Guess again." Said a voice from nearby.

BANG!

A bullet blasted Eleanor and she evaporated into green, brown and yellow pixels. Jimmy let out a yelp of horror as he looked to the source of the bullet. Kasimar was standing on a raised platform above the ground with some metal stairs leading to it. He was holding a sniper rifle and cackled nastily.

"They say a cockroaches favorite food is the glue on the back of stamps; isn't that absurd?" Asked Kasimar as he jumped down from his vantage point so he was on level ground with Jimmy. "Looks like the only people left in the challenge are me … and you."

"I don't like where this is heading." Gulped Jimmy.

"It's the end of the line for you Jimmy; this is where I will destroy you and win immunity. After all; how could you possible beat me?" Asked Kasimar mockingly. "Oh yeah, that's right, you _can't_. Because I'm big … and you're _small_."

"Back off Kasimar1 I've got a gun; I'll shoot you I will!" Said Jimmy as he tried to be brave.

"That's your one advantage; I don't have any ammo left." Lamented Kasimar before grinning wickedly. "I guess that means I'll have to pulverize you with my bare hands. Oh how I wish this was actually real!"

"Please Kasimar; try to feel remorse." Said Jimmy softly.

"Remorse is just a stupid seven letter word." Said Kasimar tonelessly. "Anyway … this ought to be fun!"

"… I beat you once, I'll beat you again." Said Jimmy calmly.

* * *

**Confessional: Good VS Evil**

**Jimmy: Was I scared? … Duh! I was in a one on one fight with Kasimar of all people! You all saw what he did to Gary … but I couldn't let him win immunity; if he did somebody would be voted off who didn't deserve it.**

**Kasimar: I love causing pain! Yahahaha!**

* * *

Kasimar ran at Jimmy and tried to smash him with a steel pipe that Kasimar had picked up earlier in the challenge. He swung it at Jimmy but Jimmy ducked and evaded the pipe. Kasimar managed to land a hard punch at Jimmy which sent Jimmy stumbling backwards and onto the floor. Because Jimmy fell down he, by luck, had avoided a smash from Kasimar's pipe.

Jimmy attempted to fire a shot at Kasimar but Kasimar managed to grab him by the neck and force him against a wall.

"Any regrets Jimmy?" Asked Kasimar in a hateful tone full of malice.

By instant Jimmy kicked Kasimar in the crotch; despite Chris telling the contestants they wouldn't feel pain Kasimar felt agony from this kick. As he staggered backwards Jimmy elbow dived onto him and Kasimar let out a grunt of pain.

Jimmy noticed an oil barrel next to him; after retreating to a safe distance he fired a shot at the barrel which exploded into a large amount of flames. Some of these flames managed to get Kasimar as he ran past them and set him partially on fire.

"Damn you!" Growled Kasimar as he quickly put the flames on him out. He now had a few virtual burn marks.

The flames were starting to get bigger and were now blocking off the exit to the lower levels. Kasimar hit Jimmy over with a hit from his steel pipe and then kicked him. Jimmy fired a bullet at Kasimar … it hit Kasimar in his dick.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Kasimar like a little baby girl.

Jimmy took advantage of this distraction and managed to grab Kasimar's pipe off him and smacked him across the head with it; Kasimar dropped to the ground and looked up at Jimmy as he pointed the gun at Kasimar, he looked a little afraid but managed to summon a smirk even with the flames that were closing in.

"Bullet train to hell Kasimar, now boarding." Said Jimmy calmly.

Kasimar blinked and gained a _very_ deadpan expression at the awful Bond One Liner.

"Oh yeah gee, good one Jimmy. What a great joke. I mean; how many nights did you stay up late thinking that one up? And just so that you'd have the joke for such a situation … yeah, bad joke." Said Kasimar in a voice dripping with sarcasm. "… So you're gonna shoot me?"

"… Yep." Shrugged Jimmy.

BANG!

Jimmy blasted a bullet at Kasimar; he evaporated into red and blue pixels. As he disappearing into nothingness the environment around Jimmy began to disappear since he was returning to the real world.

* * *

**Confessional: Good wins!**

**Jimmy: I don't believe it! I defeated Kasimar! … I hope he isn't going to hurt me…**

**Kasimar: I was beaten by a kid … this #bleep# sucks!**

* * *

After Jimmy and Kasimar had been bought back to reality and exited their pods in the V.R.E.G Chris gathered the six campers and announced the results.

"This wasn't what I was expecting. Seriously! I thought the challenge would go on for another two hours at least!" Frowned Chris before shrugging. "But a challenge is a challenge I suppose. Either way Jimmy has won immunity … he was the _last_ person I would have expected to win … but bigger chocks have happened in this show I guess."

Everyone besides Kasimar cheered at Jimmy's victory; Tabitha did as well so she wouldn't look suspicious.

"Now; since the challenge has ended earlier than I had expected the Bonfire Ceremony won't be for a few hours. Until then you may do whatever you please." Said Chris. "Oh; and a special congratulations to Jimmy and Eleanor for defeating Pyramid Head; that monster was the strongest one in the whole challenge. So … yeah. See you later losers."

Chris left to his personal trailer for his sixth daily massage while the campers began to disperse. Tabitha signaled Kasimar with her eyes when the others weren't looking.

* * *

**Confessional: Time to visit the strategizing spot!**

**Tabitha: So neither Kasimar or myself won immunity? … This could be a problem.**

**Spider: I think it's clear who ***cough* **is getting voted off tonight.**

* * *

Tabitha and Kasimar were standing outside camp in the forest; in the same place they usual went to strategize. Tabitha was pacing and seemed to be seriously thinking.

"Ok Kasimar; this isn't good. You failed to win immunity and it's pretty clear that you are the one getting voted off tonight." Said Tabitha seriously.

"So what should I do?" Asked Kasimar as he crossed his arms.

"There is only one thing to do." Said Tabitha as she stopped pacing. "Do the same thing to one of the others that you did to Gary."

"Alright!" Grinned Kasimar as he cracked his knuckles. "Now _this_ I can do. Who do you want me to pulverize?"

"Chris mentioned that Jimmy and Eleanor took down the strongest monster in the challenge. As Jimmy is immune we obviously cannot vote for him." Explained Tabitha before continuing. "That means we'll have to go for Eleanor and get the others to vote for her out of sympathy."

"So you want m to beat up the twelve year old?" Asked Kasimar.

"Unless you have a problem with that." Replied Tabitha.

"Not at all; but younger people are easier to kill; I might get carried away." Smirked Kasimar. "How exactly do you want me to destroy her? What style?"

"… You're bully aren't you? Use your imagination!" Said Tabitha as though it was obvious.

"Kasimar thought for a moment and suddenly gained a _truly_ wicked expression.

"I know _exactly_ what to do! Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar as he headed back to camp.

After Kasimar was gone Tabitha sighed to herself.

"When the final three rolls around I'm gonna backstab that sociopath." Muttered Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: What idea could he have thought off?**

**Kasimar: I'm not going **_**anywhere**_** tonight!**

* * *

Spider, Eleanor, Lavender and Jimmy were relaxing on the beach. This meant they weren't at camp. Kasimar exited the woods with his hands in his pockets and headed towards the cabins; he passed the team Jungle cabin as well as his own. He stopped in front of the Team Puzzle cabin and smirked evilly.

"Time to put Operation Rat Shredder into effect." Said Kasimar with a smirk as he entered the _girl's_ side of the Team Puzzle cabin.

* * *

**Confessional: … Oh **_**god**_**; I hope he isn't going what I think he's going to do.**

**Chris: This is gonna be great for ratings!**

* * *

At the beach a few minutes later the Spider was sitting no the sand looking out at the waves. Lavender was dozing on the sand while Jimmy and Eleanor were building a sandcastle.

"This is really nice isn't it?" Smiled Jimmy. "Kasimar is going to go tonight and after that I think we can take it easy for the rest of the competition."

"You said it Jimmy. Kasimar has gotten away with his atrocious deeds for way to long." Agreed Eleanor. "I'm just going to go and feed my ferrets; could you start working on a tower for the sandcastle?"

"No problem Eleanor." Saluted Jimmy.

Eleanor got to her feet and happily jogged back to camp. This had been a great way to spend the summer. She had made a lot of true friends and Dandelion had now had her babies. Eleanor was pretty close to winning as well. She felt like everything was well in the world.

Eleanor arrived at the cabins and entered her cabin with a smile on her face.

"Hello everyone!" Chirped Eleanor cheerfully. "Would any of you like … some … c-c-c-c…"

Eleanor trailed off as her eyes widened in horror. Her blood ran cold and she began to breath quickly. A moment later she let out a horrified bloodcurdling scream.

About four seconds later Jimmy ran into the cabin with a look of concern on his face.

"Eleanor! What's wrong? Are you ok?" Asked Jimmy while panicking in case something has happened to Eleanor.

Eleanor just pointed to the floor as she dropped to her knees and burst into tears.

Jimmy looked where she was pointing and froze in horror.

Bitsy, one of the baby ferrets. Was lying on the floor of the cabin … dead.

* * *

**Confessional: …**

**Eleanor: **(She is crying in misery).

**Jimmy: Oh my god … did … did Kasimar do that?** (Jimmy just gapes in horror).

* * *

A short while later everyone but Kasimar was in the mess hall; nobody knew where the bully was but didn't care at all. Eleanor was sitting at the Team Puzzle table crying into Jimmy's shoulder while Jimmy gently stroked her back to calm her down. Spider looked dumbstruck. Lavender looked horrified. And Tabitha … she looked paler than a ghost and looked speechless.

* * *

**Confessional: No joke here.**

**Tabitha: Oh my god! When I said to Kasimar to hurt Eleanor I did **_**not**_** mean this at all! That guy is insane! … My god, what have I done?**

* * *

Chris walked into the mess hall not looking very bothered at all. He stopped next to the campers and began to speak.

"Eleanor's ferret has been buried and put to rest. You may stop crying now." Said Chris while clearly not caring at all.

"Chris; you've got to disqualify *cough* Kasimar!" Urged Spider. "Don't you see how despicable this is?"

"I do … and it's going to be _**GREAT**_ for ratings!" Grinned Chris. "The Bonfire Ceremony will take place in an hour and a half. You can get rid of Kasimar through votes; I cannot do anything else."

* * *

**Confessional: Chris is a bigot.**

**Chris: Nor would I want to! This is ratings gold!**

**Eleanor: **(She is crying her eyes out).

* * *

While Spider, Lavender and Jimmy comforted Eleanor, Tabitha excused herself and said she needed to clear her head. She quickly headed to where she and Kasimar usually made their plans and found Kasimar waiting for her.

"Oh, hey Tabitha? Did you see what I did? Pretty cool huh?" Smirked Kasimar.

"Shut up! You twisted sick #bleep#! How could you? Eleanor is in tears! Do you know how serious what you've done is?" Asked Tabitha in fury.

"Not really; it was just a rat, plenty more in the world." Shrugged Kasimar clearly not giving a damn.

"I don't know why I ever allied with you! You're a complete monster!" Snarled Tabitha.

"Like you're any better than me! I know what you thought of Uzuri. You also paid me to break Gary's legs and a lot of other stuff. You're practically my female counterpart … and don't try and deny it." Sneered Kasimar.

Tabitha became silent as Kasimar continued.

"If you vote for me tonight I _will_ make you regret it." Promised Kasimar. "You should get to work on convincing the others to vote for Eleanor if you know what's good for ya."

Tabitha blinked and let out a sigh as she turned and headed back to camp deep in thought.

* * *

**Confessional: Is Tabitha developing a conscience?**

**Tabitha: I hate to admit it … but Kasimar's right; and I know it. I'm pretty nasty myself. I should probably vote him off … but I know what will happen if I do. **(Tabitha looks haunted and scared for a moment as she seems to recall something. She quickly shakes it off). **Well; I may as well get some people to vote for Eleanor. It's for her own good really.**

* * *

Lavender was sitting on a rock on the beach looking shocked. Kasimar had hit an all new low. He probably didn't even feel any remorse at all.

"Is this what humans are like?" Asked Lavender to herself.

"Hello Lavender." Greeted Tabitha as she walked up and sat next to Lavender on the rock. "Are you ok?"

"Not really; Eleanor is in tears and Kasimar had gone lower than a snake. He had no reason to do that … he's pure evil." Said Lavender bitterly.

"I completely agree." Said Tabitha honestly; except she knew why Kasimar had done it and felt a big twinge of guilt. "Lavender; I have something I need to talk to you about."

"What is it?" Asked Lavender.

"I assume you are voting for Kasimar tonight right?" Asked Tabitha though she knew the answer.

"Of course I am; he isn't getting away with his despicable deeds this time." Said Lavender in hatred at the thought of the bully.

"Once again, I completely agree … but I've been thinking…" Said Tabitha as she purposely trailed off. "Maybe we should vote for Eleanor.

"Why would you do that?" Asked Lavender curiously. "She's in tears already."

"Exactly; she's in extreme emotional stress, I know the feeling. We should vote her off, not out of meanness, but for her own safety. The Playa could help her deal with her stress because it's pretty clear that Chris doesn't give a damn." Explained Tabitha. "And if we voted Kasimar off then he'd be angry obviously. I'm betting he'd go on a rampage at the Playa and might … well … you can probably guess what he'd do."

"… You have a very good point Tabitha." Said Lavender in understanding. "But if Kasimar is still here he might win, none of us want that."

"I know; but the four of us could gang up on Kasimar and make him _truly_ sorry that he was ever born." Said Tabitha half sincerely. "So … what do you say?"

Lavender was silent in thought for a moment; she looked at Tabitha and nodded.

"It's for her own good." Agreed Lavender.

* * *

**Confessional: She's wrong for the right reasons.**

**Tabitha: That's Lavender down; now I just need to convince Spider … and maybe Jimmy.**

* * *

Spider was sitting by a tree near the edge of camp; the sun was beginning to set. Soon Kasimar would be off the Island … but at a terrible price. Kasimar being merely voted off wouldn't satisfy Spider.

"Spider; you ok?" Asked Tabitha as she sat down beside Spider.

"Oh; hello Tabitha." Said Spider with a polite smile. "What brings you here?"

"I need to talk to you about something important." Said Tabitha seriously. "About tonight's vote."

"You're voting for Kasimar aren't you?" Asked Spider.

"… I wish I could." Said Tabitha regretfully. "I've decided that, for the greater good, I will vote for Eleanor."

"I'm not quite following you." Said Spider in confusion. "Why Eleanor?"

"It's for her own safety." Explained Tabitha. "If she stays here then she's going to be under emotional stress; that sort of thing in such a large dose when somebody is young can really cause a lot of damage to a person. If Eleanor if voted off then she can get the psychological help that she needs."

"What you are saying makes a lot of sense." Agreed Spider. "But I really want Kasimar to suffer for what he has done."

"And suffer he shall." Promised Tabitha. "The rest of us can team up on him and cause him equal pain and greater to what he has dished out to other people in his life."

"… I understand." Said Spider quietly. "But … is it really the right thing to do?"

"Sometimes people must choose between what is right and what is easy. Voting Eleanor off is the right thing to do. Trust me" Said Tabitha charismatically.

Spider was silent for a moment and nodded.

"… You're right; I'll vote for Eleanor. I just hope she understands why I've done it." Said Spider softly.

"Don't worry; she will." Assured Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: By watching the reruns I presume, right?**

**Spider: I always try and do the right thing … if voting off Eleanor is the right thing to do then I guess it's my duty to do so. I just hope she can forgive me.**

* * *

Eleanor was crying in her cabin; Jimmy had been comforting her but he had left for a short while so that he could get something to eat as he hadn't eaten since breakfast.

"Poor Eleanor; someone as truly wonderful as her doesn't deserve this cruel twist of fate." Mumbled Jimmy softly. "I hope Bitsy is up in heaven now, looking down at Eleanor."

Tabitha entered the mess hall and spotted Jimmy. Tabitha walked over and sat next to him.

"How are you holding up Jimmy?" Asked Tabitha in concern. "I know that you and Eleanor are best friends … so this must be a horrible thing to experience."

"You've read my mind." Nodded Jimmy. "Kasimar's evilness knows no boundaries. Why can't be try for remorse?"

"Because sadly Jimmy; some people in this word are the Spawn of Satan. It's a brutal truth." Explained Tabitha. "I'm guessing you're voting for Kasimar right?"

"Duh! That guy deserves to burn in hell … or maybe the place below hell!" Frowned Jimmy before sighing sadly. "Poor Eleanor."

"This may be surprisingly to you Jimmy, but hear me out." Said Tabitha with slightly false hesitation. "I'm voting for Eleanor."

"But why?" Asked Jimmy sounding very confused.

"Foe Eleanor's owns safety. She's just lost one of her pets forever; this is probably her first experience with death. This sort of stress for somebody at a young age is a dangerous thing. She needs some psychological help." Explained Tabitha. "Voting her off so she can get that help at the Playa des losers is the best thing for her."

Jimmy was silent; he knew that Tabitha was right. But he loved Eleanor even though Eleanor herself didn't know. He wasn't going to vote for the person who meant so much to him.

"You have an excellent point Tabitha … but I'm afraid I cannot agree." Said Jimmy nobely. "I'm voting for Kasimar no matter what. I cannot allow him to get away with this."

Tabitha knew trying to convince Jimmy to vote for Eleanor would be pointless so she nodded and patted his back.

"You have a big heart Jimmy." Said Tabitha with a smile. "Eleanor might still be hear after the Bonfire Ceremony. I've talked to Spider and Lavender about this same subject … they didn't give me their answer straight away so there is no guarantee as to who is going. … Good luck Jimmy."

With enough being said Tabitha got to her feet and left the mess hall while Jimmy looked distraught.

"… What am I going to do?" Asked Jimmy quietly.

* * *

**Confessional: Do what you think is right.**

**Tabitha: And so it ends; Eleanor is definitely going tonight. I may have wanted her to go … but I didn't want it to happen in these circumstances. **

**Jimmy: **(He seems to be trying to think of something). **There's **_**gotta**_** be a way to help Eleanor.**

* * *

Tabitha soon met up with Kasimar who was waiting for her in the same sport from earlier. It was getting dark and the Bonfire Ceremony was in a mere half hour.

"So; did you convince the others to vote for the blond rat girl?" Asked Kasimar calmly.

"Yes; I did. Eleanor will be going tonight." Assured Tabitha. "But Kasimar; this isn't right. I may not be the nicest person in the world, far from it, but even I think this is too far."

"Oh shut up bitch!" Spat Kasimar as he shoved Tabitha backwards. "I did what I had to … and it's just plain funny! Don't you get it? I like seeing people in pain, it's that simple! It's why I like the Nazi's! And deep down you know that you are the same as me. Anyway; we'd better cast our votes. If you vote for me I'll kill you, _got it_?"

Tabitha silently nodded as she headed back to camp with Kasimar going a different way so nobody would get suspicious.

* * *

**Confessional: Cast your votes; make them count.**

**Spider: I feel that this is wrong … but Tabitha's right. I'm sorry Eleanor. **

**Tabitha: I vote Eleanor. Just strategy; I have to win. **(Tabitha mumbles something ineligible).

**Lavender: I vote Eleanor. I'm sorry my friend … but its for your own good. You're still my friend, don't ever forget that.**

**Eleanor: **(Her eyes are red from crying and she looks miserable). **I vote Kasimar. Good riddance!**

**Kasimar: Goodbye Eleanor! Maybe she'll get so upset she'll cut herself! Oh how I would **_**love**_** to see that! Yahahahahaha!**

* * *

The sic campers sat on logs on stumps in the bonfire pit area; most were hatefully glaring at Kasimar or looking at Eleanor sympathetically and apologetically. The moon was out and it shone down on Wawanakwa Island as the flames crackled. Chris arrived with a tray with a mere five marshmallows on it. Chris set the marshmallows down on the oil drum and looked over at the campers.

"Well campers; day twenty four is almost over. The only thing that is left to happen is for one of you to get voted off. But did we learn anything today?"

"Yeah, I leaned something … that it's very satisfying to kill ferrets and make little girls cry! Yahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar evilly which made Eleanor sob sadly and the other four glare at Kasimar.

"Well; you all know how this works by now. When I call your name come and get your marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means you're out … and you can't come back … ever."

The campers were silent which disappointed Chris as he liked it when they were upset.

"Since you are all miserable or tired I'll just toss the marshmallows to your tonight." Said Chris as he picked up the first marshmallow. "Jimmy gets the first marshmallow due to being immune."

Jimmy caught his marshmallow and looked at Eleanor on worry while glaring at Kasimar with pure hatred.

"The next person safe is Lavender."

"Spider"

"Tabitha"

Kasimar and Eleanor were still without marshmallows. Kasimar sneered at Eleanor and looked very confident while Eleanor just sobbed. She noticed the apologetic looks on the faces of some of the others and realized they had voted for her so she would be safe. Eleanor lowered her head and whimpered in sadness.

"Eleanor, Kasimar, this is the final marshmallow of the night. Whoever does not get this is out and must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat and losers and can't ever come back ever. … I personally think this is very wrong … but the final marshmallow of tonight's Bonfire Ceremony goes to…

…

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…

…

…

…

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…

…

…

…

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…

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Eleanor."

Eleanor was so surprised that she didn't even catch her marshmallow. But Eleanor's surprise was nothing to how shocked Kasimar looked. He looked as though he had been hit in the balls with a sledgehammer wielded by a professional wrestler.

"Well Kasimar; sorry to say it … but you're out. I guess your luck has run dry huh?" Smirked Chris.

Kasimar's eye twitched and he began to shake as rage boiled up within him.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Kasimar, his eyes ablaze with rage. "How is this possible? I can't have been voted off!"

"Sorry dude ... but you had more votes against you than Eleanor did. It's dock of shame time bra." Smirked Chris sadistically.

Kasimar stood still for a moment, completely speechless, a moment later he dropped her his knees … and began to cry like a baby.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I wanted to win! No! No! No!" Screamed Kasimar like a little baby. "How can this be?"

"Come on everyone at home!" Said Lavender as she got to her feet. "Everyone point and laugh at him!"

Everyone in the Bonfire pit began to laugh at Kasimar tauntingly, even Tabitha and Chris. Kasimar knew that most of the world was laughing at him as well and dropped to all four and began to pound the ground with his fist while screaming tears down his face.

"No! Boohoohoohoohoohoohoo! Waaaaaaah!" Wailed Kasimar as he began to choke and splutter in misery while hiccupping tears.

"Oh Kasimar." Said a sing song voice from in front of the bully.

Kasimar looked up with teary eyes and was met with a hard kick to the face, breaking his nose again and sending him flat onto his back.

"That's for all the times you've hurt my friends throughout the competition!" Snarled Lavender. 2Oh, and also…"

WHACK!

"EEEEEEEEEEEEK!" Screamed Kasimar, for Lavender had kicked him in the balls.

"Boy Kasimar, it sure does suck *cough* to be you right? All of your gang member you keep mentioning *cough* are probably watching you fall to pieces." Smirked Spider. "Oh; and this is for sexually harassing my beloved Quana!"

WHACK!

Spider kicked Kasimar in the balls with all the strength he could muster. Kasimar squealed in pain while everyone laughed at him even Eleanor was managing to laugh at his misfortune.

"Oh don't feel too bad Kasimar." Said Jimmy as he walked up with a box in wrapping paper. "Maybe this will 'lighten the blow'.

Kasimar weakly got to his feet, still sobbing, and snatched the present from Jimmy.

"Nice! I hope it's a porno!" Grinned Kasimar as he opened the present.

BAM!

A heavy boxing glove on a spring shot out of the box and punched Kasimar right in the jaw which sent one of his teeth flying out. Kasimar staggered around in a daze and after a few steps managed to say one sentence.

"Ooooooh, uuuuncle." Slurred Kasimar in pain as he collapsed in a heap on the ground, completely unconscious.

Kasimar lay battered on the ground, completely humiliated and defeated for the whole world to see.

"Well what do you know?" Said Jimmy after a few seconds of silence. "He caused so much pain to others in his life and took so little that a simple boxing globe on a spring was enough to knock him out … take him away Chef!"

Chef Hatchet walked up and grabbed Kasimar by the ankles; he began to drag the beaten bully away towards the boat of loser, dragging him through a bush of thorns in the process.

"Good riddance!" Cheered Lavender as Kasimar was tossed onto the boat of losers with a crash. The boat sailed off into the night with Kasimar on it.

Kasimar had been defeated.

"… I guess karma does exist." Said Eleanor with a small smile before sniffling. "But at such a price…"

"Come no Eleanor; let's get back to camp." Said Jimmy as he took Eleanor's hand and began to walk her back to the cabins.

Tabitha felt relieved that Kasimar was gone … but she felt confused. She knew there had been four votes in favor of Eleanor going … so how had this happened?

* * *

**Confessional: The sixth vote; the one that wasn't shown earlier.**

**Jimmy: **(He looks calm yet very angry). **I wish it hadn't come to this … but Kasimar has gone too far this time. He had enough chances to feel remorse and try to change himself. It is clear the only thing his kind understands is force. Kasimar … I hope God has mercy on your evil twisted black soul because I certainly won't! **(Jimmy opens the vote box with a screwdriver and takes out the votes that were already in the box and puts in a new batch). **Tabitha may mean well … but this is personal. Good riddance Kasimar, rot in hell! You think seeing pain and tears is funny? Let's see how you like it when it happens to you!**

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a surprised but content expression on his face.

"I don't think anybody expected this to happen! Kasimar has met his end in the game and is certainly going to receive hell from the other twenty losers! But what will happen now Will Eleanor recover from this emotional blow? Will Jimmy ever tell her how he feels? And who will be the next person voted off the island? Find out next time on Total Drama letterz!

* * *

The boat of losers pulled up at the Playa Des Losers; Chef Hatchet picked up the still unconscious Kasimar and tossed him onto the Playa's dock with a thud. Chef began to drive the boat of losers back to Wawanakwa Island while feeling content on that night's elimination.

A few moments later Kasimar stirred and slowly opened his eyes; he got to his feet and saw he wasn't at Camp Wawanakwa anymore. He then remembered that he had just been voted off, lost all chance at the million … and had been completely humiliated on international television.

"Nooooooooooooo!" Roared Kasimar in fury. "This can't be! When I get my hands on the wusses who voted for me I'm gonna-"

Kasimar as interrupted by the sound of somebody clearing their throat; Kasimar turned and paled. Standing a few meters away was a crowd of all twenty of the campers who had been voted off previously … and they looked _pissed_.

"Well howdy Kasimar." Smirked Oscar. "Looks like you've lost the game. I seem to remember you boasting about how strong you are very often."

"How abut a twenty VS one fight against all of us?" Asked Quana with a grin.

"I get first crack at him!" Growled Gary at the bully who had put him in a wheelchair.

As the crowd began to advance on Kasimar the bully felt a wetness go down his leg; he had wet himself in terror.

"No! Please don't hurt me!" Wailed Kasimar as he cowered in fear as the twenty losers began to beat the ever loving crap out of him while Kasimar screamed and wailed like a little girl.

* * *

Eleanor was tucked up in her bed looking sad; Jimmy was sitting on a chair next to her bed.

"Aren't you happy Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy. "Kasimar's gone! He has finally been defeated!"

"I am happy about that; delighted even." Smiled Eleanor before sighing sadly. "But … Kasimar killed one of my ferrets … Bitsy was only a few days old. Why would he do such a horrible thing?"

"I don't know … but he cannot hurt you anymore; he's gone for good." Promised Jimmy. "I'm sure Bitsy is up in heaven, squeaking happily at how great you are doing at this contest."

Eleanor managed to smile as she settled down.

"Thank you Jimmy; you've always been there for me." Said Eleanor softly.

"Anything for a friend as good as you." Replied Jimmy modestly.

Eleanor closed her eyes and within a minute it looked like she was asleep. Jimmy got up from his char and was about to head to the door when he took another look at Eleanor. She looked so peaceful and adorable when she was asleep.

Jimmy smiled and gently leaned in and gave Eleanor a light kiss on the cheek.

"Good night Eleanor." Whispered Jimmy as he left to cabin to go to his own bed.

After Jimmy left Eleanor slowly opened her eyes; she hadn't been asleep after all!

"Goodnight Jimmy." Blushed Eleanor as she settled down to sleep.

* * *

Votes

Unknown who voted for who as they were switched.

Kasimar: 5

Eleanor: 1

* * *

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia again, Kasimar

* * *

… AND KASIMAR IS GONE! How is that for a downfall? But his karma isn't over yet, nope! Wait until the next aftermath; when that happens he will _really_ suffer … if the other losers don't kill him first!

I really didn't want to have to make Eleanor suffer like that … but it was the only way the plot would work. But Kasimar is now gone for good. Only four episodes remain; soon the champion will be crowned.

Next Time: Eddie and Sasha return once more to interview Andy, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia and Kasimar.


	53. Total Ousted Alphabet 5

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his mega awesome story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains some slight naughtiness, electrocution, rotten fruit and all round hilarity. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven OscarxXaria**

**Current Poll Stats: **So far it seems most of you want Spider to win; he ahs three votes. Second is Lavender with two votes. Eleanor, Jimmy and Tabitha tie for third with one vote each. Keep voting as the poll will be removed when the next chapter is submitted.

**Note: **I'm alive! Sorry for the long wait guys; I've been busy with real life; specifically 6th form. I could talk about the large amounts of (shudder) homework that has kept me busy … but you don't want that do you? No! You came here for laughs and laughs you shall receive!

Party on dudes!

* * *

Bright stage lights shone down from the rafters above the stage. In a large room at the Playa Des Losers a big number of people were sitting in the audience with popcorn and toffee apples while waiting for the latest episode of Total Ousted Alphabet to begin. It was going to be great … or at least it had better because some people in the audience had spent money no rotten fruit and veg to throw at Kasimar and maybe Nakia too.

Eddie and Sasha were sitting in their chairs waiting to be given the signal to start the show. To the right of the stage was a large high rise sofa with three rows to it. Along the bottom row were, from left to right, were Yessica, Irene, Fifi, Daisy, Patch, Hector and Gary with Raven sitting on Gary's lap. On the middle row, from left to right, were Zita, Wallace, Vinnie, Uzuri and Carlton. On the top row were Mable and Oscar.

Eddie was writing notes in his notebook and had a serious expression on as he jotted some stuff down while flicking back to previous pages every now and then as if to make sure the notes were consistent.

Sasha was, as usual, playing on her DS; the sounds of beeps and whooshes from the game could be heard. It seemed like she was playing a sort of platformer.

"You're on in three, two, one." Said an intern from behind the camera.

Eddie pocketed his notebook and Sasha reluctulently paused her game. Both smiled for the camera.

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Said Eddie.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Said Sasha.

"Welcome to another exciting episode of Total Ousted Alphabet; today we'll be interviewing an interesting mix of the campers. Some that the fans loved … and some that the entire fandom hated." Said Eddie as he tipped his hat.

"I think that Nakia and Kasimar were about as hated as the rival bat in Pong." Grumbled Sasha.

"What do you mean?" Asked Eddie with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't tell me you don't know." Blinked Sasha. "That rival bat is evil! It moves faster than the player and always knows exactly where to go. I consider it the first video game villain."

"I bet it was such a villain that it made players cry when they lost!" Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly from his seat.

"Only kids and immature people cry when they lose at a video game." Said Daisy stiffly. "Of course; I believe that all video games suck."

"You take that back." Scowled Sasha.

"Make me!" Sneered Daisy.

"Anyway." Continued Eddie to stop a possible fight. "Today we're going to interview the six most recently voted off campers; some full deserved what they got … and others didn't."

"And before we start the interviews; if you look over to Gary you will all see he is out of the wheelchair and has made a full recovery from when Kasimar hurt him." Said Sasha with a smile while the audience cheered.

"I had my casts removed about half an hour ago." Said Gary with happily. "I made sure to stay in the wheelchair so I could run Kasimar over though. I think he's been in the medical wing for treatment, he'll need it after we kicked his ass!"

"I for one am glad you're all better." Smiled Raven. "And with Kasimar being eliminated on the same day I think this is definitely a great day."

"Thanks Ravy." Said Gary as he gave Raven a peck on the cheek.

"Tonight's first guest dates Mable, was blackmailed by Tabitha, returned to the game back on day fifteen and he Cosplayed as Sonic the Hedgehog; give it up for Andy!"

Andy walked out from backstage as the crowd cheered loudly. Andy sat down in the interview chair and relaxed.

"Welcome back Andy." Greeted Sasha. "It's been a while since we last had you here. A lot has happened since then huh?"

"That would be an understatement; both good things and bad things have befallen me … but all in all I'm happy with the way things have turned out." Replied Andy.

"Only five campers are left in the competition, and Tabitha is among them. What are your thoughts on that?" Asked Eddie as he knew Andy didn't like Tabitha.

"I can only hope that she doesn't get much further; now that all her allies are gone I wouldn't think she can retreat from her downfall for much longer; at least I hope so." Murmured Andy.

"Tabitha is mean! I wish she'd get locked in an outhouse after Owen used it!" Pouted Uzuri.

"Whoa … that's a pretty extreme punishment." Remarked Yessica.

"So? She deserves it!" Declared Uzuri. "Who agrees?"

"Me!" Said a large number of the peanut gallery in usion.

"I agree too." Smirked Andy. "But toilet humor aside I think it is safe to say Tabitha isn't gonna get much further without allies. Jimmy, Spider, Eleanor and Lavender are close friends so the next time that she doesn't win immunity she's gone."

"We need your opinion on something Andy." Said Sasha. "Tabitha may be pretty nasty; but she isn't as bad as Kasimar. Remember how horrified she was when Kasimar killed one of the baby ferrets?"

"I can understand that; I would say that while Tabitha isn't exactly as chaotic evil as Kasimar is she still has a lot more bad qualities than good qualities. The fact nobody knows her true nature as well as her being very intelligent makes her quite a powerful adversary. I just hope the others can catch on before it's too late."

"What puzzles me is why Tabitha would do all this to get a million dollars when she is already rich." Said Eddie as he flipped to a previous page in his notebook. "I looked up on Tabitha's family and Tabitha's wealth and financial standing lies somewhere between obscenely rich and unfathomably rich; she's in one of the top ten richest families in the world. I can't help but be suspicious."

"She might be greedy." Pointed out Zita. "I can attest to that as I kinda like money as well."

"Who doesn't?" Asked Daisy. "Money is a wonderful thing!"

"I like trains." Said Patch dumbly.

A few of the peanut gallery members stared at Patch in confusion for a brief moment.

"If I may ask you Andy; how are things going with Mable?" Asked Eddie sounding interested.

"We're going steady; things are pretty good at the moment." Smiled Andy with a wink at Mable which made her giggle. "Usually we relax around the pool bar and talk or flirt; nothing too interesting."

"I wouldn't say that." Grinned Irene suggestively. "I saw you squeeze her butt the other day when she was in her blue bikini!"

"Irene!" Blushed Andy in extreme embarrassment as he covered his face; Mable did a similar action.

"That was private!" Groaned Mable.

"What can I say; I notice things." Grinned Irene goofily.

"Well … what would your ideal boyfriend be?" Asked Andy in an attempt to turn the tables.

Irene blanched and looked at her feet; the others didn't actually know about her sexual preferences.

"Somebody nice." Replied Irene.

"I think we should move on." Giggled Sasha.

"But I want to hear more embarrassing details about Andy and Mable's relationship." Laughed Vinnie.

"Come on guys; I think we've embarrassed the poor boy enough." Said Fifi with an amused eye roll.

"I'll say!" Frowned Andy though he seemed to be suppressing a smile.

"Big question Andy, which is better … Star Wars or Star Trek?" Asked Eddie.

"I'm a 'trekkie' and proud of it." Said Andy promptly. "Spock was the best character in my opinion."

"Star Trek is for nerds." Whined Daisy. "Seriously; nerds are freaks and just plain weird."

"What's so bad about somebody being weird? Weird people make the world interesting." Glowered Andy.

"Whatever; the fact you're dating a blue haired bimbo says a lot about your already abysmal IQ." Said Daisy arrogantly.

Sasha lifted the arm of her chair and pressed a button. Instantly a large amount of slimy and sticky blue jelly fell down on Daisy and somehow didn't splatter anyone else in the slightest.

"MY CLOTHS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAIYEEEEEEEEEE!" Screamed Daisy in horror as she ran backstage; the sound of a crash and some equipment collapsing was heard.

"That never gets old." Chuckled Hector.

"So who would you like to win the competition out of the remaining five?" Asked Sasha while giggling at Daisy's reaction to the blue jelly.

"I'd say Eleanor; after what Kasimar did to her I think she deserves to win; and besides, she's one of the nicest of all of us. Though I wouldn't mind if Spider won … or anybody besides Tabitha really."

"Fan mail time." Said Eddie as he took out a decently sized sack of letters. "More people have written to you since last time it would seem."

"It's nice to know that people are fans of me." Smiled Andy.

"Right; let's get to it." Said Eddie as he opened the first letter. "The first letter is from Willy. He says, dear Andy, I died, what should I do? Hmm, that was … different."

"I think that comes under the term spam." Said Andy with a raised eyebrow at the stupid letter.

"This next letter if from Zune. Isn't that a sort of MP3 player?" Asked Eddie rhetorically as he began to read the second letter. "Dear Andy; what is your favorite flavor of jam and do you order Chinese takeaways on a daily basis?"

"Ok; my favorite flavor of jam is plum … and no; I do not order Chinese takeaways everyday. First of all I'm Japanese, not Chinese, second of all it is really fattening, I need to be in my prime to be an astronaut."

"Chinese food is SO good!" Grinned Wallace. "It's very fattening … it's so evil! Mwahahahahahahaha!"

"One more letter." Said Eddie as he opened a third envelope. "Dear Andy; you were amazing during your time on the show! It is completely terrible how Tabitha treated you with blackmail and threats. Seeing you and Mable together shows that love is beautiful and that no matter the type of relationship it is still love. From Sunny."

"That was a nice letter." Smiled Andy. "I've heard of people who don't like interracial relationships, but that letter proved a valid point, it is still love."

"Love is scary; girls can get really angry." Whimpered Carlton.

"I assure you not all of us do." Said Fifi comfortingly.

"It's been great having you on the show again Andy." Smiled Sasha. "We need to move on but I'm sure you wouldn't say no to sitting next to Mable eh?"

"You guessed right." Blushed Andy as he moved over to the tripled rowed sofa and sat on the top row next to Mable.

"Our next guest started out as grumpy and cynical but revealed to have a genuinely nice sweet side. She also helped Oscar force feed Wallace a tainted star fruit and made it to the final ten; give a cheer for Xaria!"

Xaria walked out from backstage as the audience burst into applause. Xaria sat down on the interviewee chair and the interview began.

"Welcome to Total Ousted Alphabet Xaria." Greeted Sasha. "Glad to have you here."

"Well it's not like I really had a choice if I attended or not." Replied Xaria with her usual snarky smirk. "But I predict Kasimar will suffer during his interview and I wouldn't miss that for the world."

"Same here." Grinned Oscar.

"So Xaria; where to begin?" Asked Sasha as she crossed her legs. "You were definitely one of the more interesting contestants of the season, a dark horse even. You definitely had a number of finest moments."

"I fondly remember force feeding Wallace his tainted star fruit." Said Xaria while smirking at Wallace.

"Well I force fed you a raw jalapeno so we're even!" Replied Wallace with an immature huff.

"Some of the contestants as well as Chris tended to call you bumble bee; we know you don't like that, but why did you dye your hair anyway?" Asked Eddie curiously.

"To be honest I just did it as a statement of individuality and because it looked cool. It's black and yellow, not yellow and black! No similarities to bumble bee's whatsoever." Explained Xaria.

"Technically it is similar to bumble bees." Pointed out Hector.

"What's so bad about bees anyway?" Asked Zita. "They pollinate our world and make honey."

"Honey is SO good; it tastes like a rainbow." Drooled Irene.

"What was your favorite challenge?" Asked Sasha.

"The human snooker challenge; after all, I was the last person standing in that." Said Xaria in fond memory. "Though I also quite liked the cosplaying challenge."

"I certainly didn't." Frowned Uzuri as Vinnie gently gave her hand a comforting squeeze.

"It is quite obvious that you did not get along with Kasimar; Oscar had a big conflict with Kasimar, would you say that it contributed to your already huge dislike of Kasimar?" Inquired Eddie.

"I can honestly say that even if Oscar wasn't in the competition I would still hate Kasimar. At times I think he cared more about hurting people than he did about the prize." Grumbled Xaria.

"I think that that's the general idea." Said Raven. "He's a complete sociopath; I wonder if his mother did drugs when she was pregnant with him; I seriously don't think anyone could be that evil without something like that happening."

"Chris being the host is a clear sign to Kasimar that he could do pretty much whatever he wanted." Sighed Andy as he remembered the pinball challenge.

"But we kicked his ass just an hour or so ago, so it's ended up mostly alright." Said Xaria as she rested her head in her hand and her arm on the arm of her armchair.

"Mostly." Murmured Sasha. "Xaria; I recall you mentioning that you own a NES; what is your favorite game for it?"

"Easily Super Mario Bros 3." Replied Xaria swiftly. "It may be retro but it's a really giant game, no pun intended due to the fourth world being giant themed."

"You seem to like arcade type games." Noted Eddie. "By any chance did you ever win a toy on those skill crane games? I never could."

"For those you have to rely more on luck than skill in order to be successful." Said Xaria as she crossed her arms. "They are kind of a complete rip off and you can get better things on Ebay."

"She's completely right." Agreed Gary.

"As an awesome bad guy I love rip offs! The way they make children cry is so … diabolical! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly while throwing his arms up over dramatically.

"Don't do that!" Wailed Carlton with a fearful shiver.

"What would you say about the relationship you have with Oscar?" Asked Eddie. "It's like tic tac toe; an X and an O."

"Well…" Said Xaria while looking a little embarrassed. "I like being with him; I guess we just got used to each other over time. They do say love is blind."

"Well said Xaria." Smiled Oscar.

"And that is all I have to say on the subject; next question please." Said Xaria casually.

"Ok then; out of the five remaining campers who would you most like to see win?" Asked Sasha.

"Lavender; she's been such a good friend and is the last member of Team Grenade still in the competition." Smiled Xaria. "Though if Jimmy won it would be fine by me as well."

"Time to bring out the fan mail." Said Sasha as she took out a large sack of letters from behind her chair. "You seem to be a fairly popular contestant."

"With people like Nakia and Kasimar in the competition there was no way I could be the least popular." Smirked Xaria.

Sasha opened the first letter and began to read.

"Dear Xaria; if you could buy any car you wanted, what would it be? From Automobile Automatic." Read Sasha. "Well; looks like we're about to learn something new."

"Seeing as I've got my driver's license this is something I've thought about before." Said Xaria as she crossed her legs. "I'd say the Peugeot 206 Rally Car; it just looks cool though I'm no rally racer."

"It was the best rally car in Gran Turismo 3." Said Carlton; he looked confused when some of the others stared at him. "What?"

"I thought you were scared of everything." Said Mable.

"Not racing games." Shrugged Carlton.

"The next letter is from Clancy." Said Sasha as she neatly opened a second letter. "Dear Xaria, I'm a big fan of you, you kicked butt throughout the competition and showed that bees can be tough, ok bad joke but I was very upset when you were voted off thanks to that no good snake Tabitha. If you get onto season three, if there is one, then I'll be rooting for you! Also, why do you have an orange square on your shirt?"

"My shirt has an orange square because lots of people I've met back home have called me a square; I wore the short to mock them in a snarky way. I'd like to write Clancy back; he seems quite nice … but if he wants a date it'll have to wait, I'm taken." Chuckled Xaria.

"The next letter is from Flavio." Said Sasha as she opened a third letter. "Dear Xaria; you seem kind of grumpy a lot of the time. If it's ok with you; could you tell us the things that really grind your gears?"

"Ok everyone, prepare for a rant on what I don't like." Said Xaria as she cracked her knuckles.

"Let us get to the bomb shelter first." Joked Yessica which made Irene laugh.

"First of all; arrogant people, the types of individuals who have an ego the size of the Amazon rain forest. They act all high and mighty yet never do anything to back up their arrogance. You're popular at school? We don't care! You're prom queen? We don't care! You own a Ferrari? We do care because that's awesome … but most of the time we do not care at all!"

"People like Nakia then?" Said Andy.

"Exactly." Grumbled Xaria. "And then there are those people on YouTube who are like, 'sixtieth comment, thumbs up', what is the flippin point? Who cares if your comment is popular or not? And the amount of Justin Beiber hatred comments just makes me feel crabby … you know … like a crab! What did the poor boy ever do to you?"

"It seems on every YouTube video a troll is lurking around ready to upset somebody for no apparent reason." Muttered Gary.

"Trolls scare me as do most mythical monsters." Mumbled Carlton.

"By troll Gary means a person who goes online and tries to upset somebody; like an internet version of Kasimar." Explained Fifi.

"Well that's not very nice." Frowned Carlton.

"And above all; there is one thing that really rings my alarm." Said Xaria with an agitated tone. "Corpse Camp Killing! I mean; have you noticed people in world of Warcraft who kill you and then wait by your characters body and kill you again when you resurrect with half health … and they always find you and do it over and over! Not to mention they're usually a higher level than you, humans players in west fall beware."

"I agree; it's infuriating when the horde players do that." Agreed Hector.

"Amen." Nodded Wallace.

"And I think that wraps up your interview Xaria." Said Sasha. "It's been nice talking to you as it is with almost every contestant; but we've still got four more campers to interview tonight, so would you mind sitting with the rest of the peanut gallery?"

"No problem." Shrugged Xaria as she got up and then sat down next to Oscar.

"Our next guest has ambitions of becoming a singer, has a full body tan, is in a strong relationship with Spider and is responsible for shaving off all of Nakia's hair; give a warm welcome for Quana!"

Quana walked out from backstage and waved to the audience; the audience themselves burst into a thunderous applause. Quana took a seat on the interview chair with a smile on her face.

"Hey guys." Greeted Quana.

"Good to see you Quana." Smiled Eddie as he shook Quana's hand. "The show wouldn't be complete if we didn't have the person who shaved Nakia's hair among us."

"It was a fun job and somebody had to do it; after how she's acted I'd say it was justified." Smirked Quana.

"I agree; in a poll for the winner that was on the website a while back Nakia got dead last with no votes." Said Eddie before stroking his chin in thought. "Though oddly enough Kasimar got a vote."

"That's odd indeed." Blinked Quana.

"So Quana; you got really far in the game and made a lot of friends; what would you say was your favorite part of your time on Total Drama Letterz?" Asked Sasha.

"It's hard to pick just one moment because there are so many moments I really liked." Said Quana in happy remembrance. "I'd say the top three moments were the army challenge since Spider and I both won immunity, the talent show even though my team lost … and of course; me and Spider's first kiss."

"If somebody wrote a book about you two it should be titled something like, 'The Princess and the Spider'; I'd buy it." Smiled Zita as she rested her head in her hands.

"I've got to ask you this Quana; you're part Hispanic right?" Began Sasha.

"Yep; on my mum's side." Nodded Quana.

"Well; can you speak any Spanish?" Asked Sasha curiously.

"Ironically; despite the fact I have Hispanic heritage I cannot speak Spanish very well. Language classes are something I've always had difficulty in … but I can understand Spanish perfectly." Explained Quana.

"So you wouldn't mind if I said, 'Yo era la persona que hizo la inclinación torre inclinada'?" Asked Wallace casually.

"…Wallace; I know you weren't the person who made the leaning tower lean as it does." Said Quana with an eye roll. "Wait; you speak Spanish?"

"Fluently." Nodded Wallace. "Language classes are something I'm quite good at; all villains must be able to talk to foreigners for evil purposes right? I can speak English, Spanish, Russian, French, Ukrainian, Turkish and, of course, Italian since I'm Italian myself."

"I fear for the world if you ever got into political power." Said Xaria in a deadpan voice.

"You've mentioned in the past that The Circle of Life is your favorite song." Noted Eddie. "But what is your least favorite song? One that you cannot stand at all?"

"That's a tough one … but I think I have an answer; one song that really drives me up the wall is 'My Humps' by the black eyed peas; I like the band but that song was so _**very**_ annoying. My advice … bring earplugs!"

"One of the biggest things to happen to you on the show was your relationship with Spider." Said Sasha with a sweet smile. "Care to tell us what you think of him and how you hit it off?"

"Well; there is somebody for everyone right? Sometimes it's not immediately obvious who you belong with." Giggled Quana with a blush. "He's smart and sweet; despite all the obstacles in his life Spider still gets by. I just love him a lot!"

"So is he a good kisser?" Asked Sasha with a sly smirk.

"And did you enjoy your game of footsies?" Grinned Eddie.

"First of all, he's a very good kisser. Out of ten I give him a thirty seven." Grinned Quana with a goofy love struck expression. "And second … it was a spur of the moment thing! I'm willing to bet other couples here have got cuddly together or at least have thought about it!"

Gary and Raven exchanged a nervous and embarrassed glance and tried to keep their faces passive.

"Fair enough." Shrugged Sasha. "How about this then; how did you get a full body tan?"

Quana blanched and looked nervous.

"As a detective I was able to deduce how pretty easily." Said Eddie with a playful smirk.

"Me too!" Giggled Irene.

"I know as well; it would be evil to tell everyone … but it would be more evil to leave everyone in suspense! Mwahahahahahaha!"

All eyes were on Quana and she grinned nervously.

"Ask me no questions and I shall tell you no lies." Said Quana smoothly. "That's all you're getting."

"I don't blame you for saying that." Agreed Eddie. "So onto the next question. You and Nakia didn't get along; you had a hate-hate conflict through and through. How did you feel when she was voted off?"

"In one word … Yeehaw!" Whooped Quana. "It was a brilliant comeuppance for her; her chances of winning gone along with all of her hair. I've been thinking of a few bald jokes that I'll make when she's on stage."

"When she went after Spider with a pipe I thought she had lost her mind." Said Andy in an almost distant tone.

"Her mind is clouded." Stated Hector.

"Here's another question Quana; how did you feel when you were voted off?" Asked Sasha sympathetically. "Along with Kasimar you were voted off unfairly and completely unlike Kasimar you did not deserve it."

"It felt horrible." Reflected Quana sadly. "When it came down to me and Spider I was just so stunned. Kasimar was definitely supposed to be going that night; I now know that Tabitha unplugged the camera so that the votes didn't count. I admit that her strategy was clever … all I ask is why; why did she do it?"

"Because she's a horrible, lousy, festering meanie!" Frowned Uzuri in an almost cute way.

"But she did seem very horrified when Mable was hurt during the pinball challenge … and with what he did tonight." Pointed out Oscar. "I don't like her, far from it, but still, I doubt she's as evil as Kasimar. Maybe just a little less."

"Maybe so; but she plays through lies and deception; she's as bad as Russell Hantz!" Pouted Uzuri.

"One last question Quana." Said Eddie. "Out of the remaining five contestants who would you like to win? Though really this should be a no brainer to everyone."

"You got it; I would most like Spider to win. I think he really deserves it; and not just because he's my boyfriend." Swooned Quana. "Though if Spider doesn't win I wouldn't mind if Eleanor won; after what Kasimar did to her she deserves something to make up for it."

"Absolutely." Agreed Eddie as he took out a large sack of letters from behind his chair. "You are quite popular with the fans it seems; I'm a bit of a fan myself ... I had five bucks on you winning."

"Sorry to disappoint you." Smiled Quana.

"Don't worry about it." Assured Eddie as he opened the first letter. "Dear Quana; you've made Total Drama Letterz a really enjoyable show. Watching you and Spider fall in love and hoping everything would work out ok was a really exciting thing to watch! I'm such a 'Spana' shipper! I wish you all the best and I bet that if Chris McCrap got fired you'd make a wonderful hostess. Yours sincerely, Bea."

"That was a nice letter; but why does everyone show such an interest in other peoples love lives?" Asked Quana.

"Because on a reality show there is no friggin privacy." Explained Zita.

"Except in the showers." Said Xaria with a smirk.

"This next letter is from Xeno." Said Eddie as he began to read the second letter. "Dear Quana; would you like to be a pretty sacrifice to the shark gods when they devour humanity … oh; I'm just going to stop reading…"

Eddie tore up the letter and tossed the pieces behind his armchair.

"We aren't in ancient times people." Said Quana while looking a bit weirded out. "Sacrificing people ended many hundreds of years ago."

"Here's another letter." Said Eddie as he opened the third letter. "Dear Quana; there is something that puzzles me. Early on in the show Nakia was nice to you and you didn't seem to mind her. But now you both detest each other with every fiber of your being. Why is that? From Maslow."

"That's a pretty good question. You see; the reason is that originally I thought that while Nakia wasn't very bright, she may have a heart of gold, like Lindsay from season 1. I quickly realized that I was completely wrong! All she did was whine and go on about hair. But the way she bullied people for no reason really pissed me off … she's really changed into a horrible person throughout the competition … or maybe she was that way in the first place."

"If she was like that all along she didn't hide her true self as well as Tabitha did." Said Mable in disdain.

"It's been nice interviewing you Quana." Smiled Sasha. "But now we've got to move on; but I bet you won't mind waiting a little while for Kasimar's interview … we have a few things planned…"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world." Grinned Quana as she got up and then sat down next to Carlton.

"Our next guest dresses like a dime store pirate, talks like a pirate too, dates a smart cheerleader and has a soft spot for koi. Give a round of applause for the fan favorite Barney!"

The audience exploded into applause as Barney walked out from backstage on his crutches and slowly sat on the interviewee chair.

"Ahoy me hearties!" Waved Barney to the audience.

"Barney; good to see you." Greeted Sasha with a polite smile. "First of all; how is your leg? Is it healing ok?"

"I'm doing fine." Assured Barney airily. "It wasn't such a serious injury; the doctors reckon I'll be back on both my feet again by the end of the season. I'm a fast healer you see."

"That's good to hear." Said Andy. "And I'm sure Lavender will be happy to hear that as well."

"Here's hoping." Grinned Barney.

"So Barney; first question … boxers or briefs?" Asked Sasha jokingly.

"Boxers; I'm wearing SpongeBob boxers as of this moment." Replied Barney promptly.

"I was only joking; but … I guess that's something to add to the wiki." Chuckled Sasha.

"Barney; you played match maker for Spider and Quana and helped them get together … but how did you know all that stuff if you've never had a relationship before the show?" Asked Eddie.

"In four words; internet, cartoons, comics and Disney yaaar … actually that's six words come to think of it … but yeah; I just picked up on these things over time me heartie." Reflected Barney. "No thanks necessary; I'm just doing my job as a guy with frenchness in his blood savvy."

"I didn't know you were French." Said Vinnie.

"Well he's French American Canadian, that's hardly French." Stated Wallace.

"You have quite a fan base Barney." Said Sasha sounding impressed. "A lot of people were rooting for you to win; in fact, you seem to be the most popular of the contestants judging by the reviews."

"Reviews yaaar?" Repeated Barney.

"The reviews on the website." Explained Sasha. "So; what do you think of having such a large fan base?"

"Well; it feels nice that so many people wanted me to win yaaar … I actually feel kind of bad for letting them down savvy." Said Barney apologetically. "I guess I was liked for my funny personality and quirks right?"

"That's one of the reasons; some liked you because of your love of pirates, others because of how easily you stood up to Kasimar and Nakia." Said Sasha. "Care to guess who has the fewest fans?"

"…Nakia yaaar?" Guessed Barney.

"Bang on." Confirmed Sasha.

"I've got a question for you Barney." Said Eddie suddenly. "We all know you're an A student … why do you hide that fact from everyone?"

"Well … I saw how Harold was treated last season and I didn't really want to experience that yaaar. So I just let out my fun loving side and kept my intelligent side hidden." Explained Barney hesitantly. "Seriously; I like Lord of the Rings, I play D&D, I have a level twenty eight Human paladin … I'm a dork."

"There are worse things than dorks … like hall monitors." Assured Zita.

"And celery." Added Patch.

"Thanks guys." Smiled Barney.

"You were the person directly responsible for ending Nakia's reign of terror in the game; how did it feel to bring about her downfall?" Asked Eddie.

"It felt great; I don't take joy in the suffering of others or anything, but when her hair was gummed up and when I watched Quana shave off Nakia's hair I couldn't help but feel a sense of fulfillment."

"That is completely natural; everyone likes seeing their worst enemies get what's coming to them." Said Hector.

"Apart from the enemies themselves." Pointed out Fifi.

"True, true." Agreed Hector.

"In three words how would you describe Lavender?" Asked Sasha.

"Smart, sexy and sweetie." Replied Barney with a goofy grin. "But could I use a few more words next time?"

"Luckily for you my next question is what are your overall thoughts on your relationship with Lavender?" Asked Sasha with a very sweet smile.

"Well; where to begin me hearties?" Said Barney with a blush. "I really think we have something good going for us. We had kind of been attracted to each other before we hooked up savvy and I did always like smart girls. She's smart and despite the fact she looks like she'd be mean she's actually one of _the_ nicest people I've ever met and probably will meet yaaar. Plus … well … she's a really good kisser! Yaaaar!"

"Boy; all this talk of love makes me wish I had a relationship." Lamented Irene.

"Maybe you'll find somebody someday." Said Mable supportively.

"But not Oscar!" Said Xaria friendlily.

"No problems there." Giggled Irene shyly.

"What was your favorite challenge?" Asked Sasha curiously.

"Probably the boat race; I really enjoyed it and Team Puzzle won! Yo ho!" Grinned Barney.

"Before we get to the fan mail, here is one more question." Said Sasha. "Who do you want to win out of the remaining five?"

"Lavender without the slightest high tide of doubt yaaar." Declared Barney. "While I'd be fine with anyone but Tabitha winning I personally want Lavender to win the most … you know, because she's my girlfriend and all yaaar."

"Time for the fan mail." Said Eddie. "Where's Barney's fan mail Sasha?"

"Be right back." Said Sasha as she quickly ran backstage.

Sasha returned a few moments later dragging a giant sack of letters behind her. She flopped down onto her armchair looking tired and took a letter out of the sack.

"Ok; let's get right to the fan mail." Said Sasha as she opened the first letter. "Dear Barney; are you on Team Edward or Team Jacob? From Meggy. Oh great; another twilight fan."

"Well; seeing as I'm a guy who isn't a softie or obsessed with pickles … I'm on Team I don't give a crad!" Replied Barney. "I prefer Lord of the Rings and the CHERUB series."

"What would pickles have to do with … in fact; it's probably best that I don't even ask." Said Sasha with an amused shake of her head as she opened another letter. "Dear Barney; if Sir Topham Hatt hot into a fight with a giant hippopotamus who would win? From Ronald. … That's … a bit odd."

"That's a very good question." Said Barney in a serious tone. "When it comes to physical strength most people would be expecting the hippo to win … but I assure you that such a conclusion is complete and utter crap. For you see … the actually winner if the fight would be … the hippo's angry mail man."

"Err … what?" Blinked Gary.

"You see; Sir Topham Hatt and the hippo share a hate-kill relationship and often send each other death threats savvy? The mail man, due to pressure of his job, would eventually get fed up and do the rightful thing. March up to the hippo's house, knock down the door, stop for a drink of ale yaaar… and grind the hippo into several tens of kilo's of hippo bacon that will feed Sir Topham Hatt for many months to come. It's delicious and also quite nutritious yaaar. Mmmmm … bacon."

"… Oooooooookaaaaay." Said Andy in confusion.

"Quite an intelligent debate Barney." Said Uzuri in understanding.

"You understood that nonsense?" Asked Vinnie.

"Of course; who wouldn't?" Smiled Uzuri.

"Let's read one more letter." Said Sasha as she opened a third letter. "Dear Barney; do you like fluffernutter? From Kelsey."

"Indeed I do like Fluffernutter; such a cute little wolf!" Grinned Barney.

"…I'm not even going to try and make sense of that." Chuckled Sasha. "It's been a pleasure having you on the show Barney; but we have to interview the next guest even though I'm sure all of us can't stand her. Could you sit with the others?"

"Not problem gamer girl." Nodded Barney. "Could somebody on the bottom row move so I can sit down? Only that I can't really climb to the top while on crutches yaaar."

"Okey dokie pokey." Said Patch dumbly as he climbed to the middle row while Barney slowly sat down on the bottom row of the peanut gallery sofa.

"Our next guest returned to the game and caused misery, she tried to cripple Spider with a pipe, obsessed over her stupid hair and in a twist of irony ended up bald; you love her, you hate her ... well, you hate her anyway, here's Nakia!"

The audience booed with no cheering but nobody came out onto stage.

"Get out there; by contract you have to get interviewed!" Said an adult's voice from backstage.

"No! You can't make me you ugly person!" Whined a very whiny voice that sounded like a whine.

A few moments later Nakia was pushed out from backstage and onto the main stage; instantly a few people threw rotten tomato's and other foul things at her. Nakia was wearing a wig that resembled her hair before it got shaved off. Nakia slipped on a tomato skid stain and fell over; her wig flew off and landed in the audience.

"Alright! A souvenir!" Cheered a member of the audience.

Nakia's bald head was now revealed and she wailed in horror as she shakily sat down on the interviewee chair.

"So; we meet again Nakia." Said Eddie. "But something seemed different about you the last time we saw each other; what could it be?"

"Oh I know! She had hair last time!" Chimed in Sasha.

"Shut up!" _SCREAMED_ Nakia in rage. "I do not deserve this!"

"Actually you kind of do; you tried to cripple Spider with a pipe! That's way past normal horridness." Frowned Sasha.

"He deserved it!" Said Nakia with a smirk while trying to ignore the audience members who were laughing at her baldness.

"In what way did he deserve that?" Asked Eddie. "He never did anything wrong; you were just being a whiny, self absorbed brat."

"Because his hair is ugly; are you that retarded?" Asked Nakia with an ugly sneer.

"Well you're not much better; are you bald or is your head blowing a bubble?" Asked Eddie.

Everyone in the audience and peanut gallery began laughing while Nakia began to turn bright red in anger.

"Bald jokes are so evil and offensive! Mwahahahahaha! … Let me try." Grinned Wallace. "Nakia; every time you take a shower you get brain washed!"

Everyone laughed again while Nakia screamed in anger.

"Shut up you #bleep# crippled retarded autistic losers!" Screamed Nakia in fury.

Everyone was silent after what Nakia had said.

"That isn't very nice." Said Uzuri looking quite hurt. "I'm autistic."

"It's probably why you're such a loser!" Sneered Nakia.

"Let me at her!" Growled Vinnie while Wallace and Zita held him back. "C'mon! Let me mess her up!"

"As deserved as it would be she's not worth the trouble." Said Zita while glaring at Nakia in anger.

While Vinnie had been restrained Quana had stood up and walked towards Nakia. She stopped a few steps away from her and looked at Nakia with … pity.

"Oh; you gonna tell me off? As if." Laughed Nakia insidiously.

"You know Nakia … I pity you. I pity you because you are too shallow, prejudiced and horrid to ever to able to live a good life and experience all the things that most of the rest of us can. You'll never find love because nobody would want you after how you've acted. You'll probably never get your so called 'popularity' back now that everyone knows what you are like. And the thing I pity about you the most … is that you're so boring; you're like a stuck record. Seriously Nakia; grow up."

The audience applauded Quana while Nakia looked completely stunned. After a couple of seconds she snarled.

"Shut up you Hispanic Horse! Go back to the ghetto." Frowned Nakia.

"That's it! It's go time!" Growled Quana as she lifted Nakia above her head and tossed her off the stage.

Nakia landed in a large tub of hair; shaved hair of people from all around the world that Eddie and Sasha found on Ebay.

"AAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Nakia as she leapt out of the hair and ran out of the showing room in humiliation.

Quana took a few deep breaths as everyone else applauded her; she sat back down in her seat and looked sheepish.

"I don't know what came over me." Admitted Quana.

"Don't worry; that was VERY satisfying." Smirked Fifi.

"Looks like we won't be reading her fan mail." Said Eddie.

"It was all hate mail anyway." Shrugged Sasha. "Shall we move onto the final guest?"

"Might as well; I have been _really_ looking forward to this. Ga'fahahaha!" Laughed Eddie while rubbing his hands together in an almost sinister way.

"Let's get ready to dish out karma; a dish best served with a side of fries." Grinned Sasha. "Our final guest of the night crossed the moral event horizon, terrorized and tormented his competition throughout his stay on Wawanakwa, put the moves on several unlucky girls and in the end was defeated by a child. Get ready to boo and jeer because here's Kasimar!"

Kasimar hobbled out from backstage; he was covered in bumps, grazes and bruises. He also had some bandages around him and had his left arm in a sling. His mohawk also had a piece ripped right off. The crowd booed loudly and threw things at Kasimar such as rotten fruit, empty cans, full cans, rocks and even, somehow, a bicycle. Kasimar wailed in pain as he sat down on the interviewee chair; even in his current state he still had a nasty expression and looked scary.

"So Kasimar … we finally meet." Said Eddie. "The displeasure is mine."

"Shut up douche nozzle!" Spat Kasimar.

"We just want to ask you a few questions." Said Sasha. "Nothing more and nothing less … maybe."

"Fine; ask away, but piss me off and I will kill you." Growled Kasimar.

"First of all; you are quite a sadistic sociopath. You've committed so many atrocities throughout the game; all that for money? The disturbing part is that not only ado you show no remorse … but you actually enjoyed doing what you did." Said Sasha sounding a little unnerved.

"Duh; I just love seeing people in pain. It really creates a pleasant feeling when I see somebody in agony or crying." Chuckled Kasimar. "Eleanor's tears were magnificent to behold and Mable's bloody wound was very satisfying. It's a form of art like the poster I have of a naked women being hanged."

"…You are a _sick_ fuck." Said Xaria in repulsion.

"Did you by any chance escape from hell?" Asked Gary.

"He's certainly going there when he dies sad and alone." Murmured Raven.

"Say whatever you please; your anger and ill feeling towards me just amuses me." Smirked Kasimar.

"What was your, dare I say it, favorite moment during the competition?" Asked Eddie while looking disgusted.

"I'd say … when I killed Eleanor's rat." Shrugged Kasimar. "Just doing my bit to help with overpopulation."

"Well; I bet your least favorite moment was when you were deservedly voted off and humiliated." Countered Sasha.

"He cried like a little baby." Grinned Oscar. "Like I always said; he's a coward."

"Shut up!" Screamed Kasimar.

"Want to know how you were voted off?" Asked Sasha.

"I bet Tabitha backstabbed me; I oughta stab her in the heart for that." Growled Kasimar.

"Actually … it was Jimmy who was responsible for your downfall." Smirked Eddie. "Can you guess how?"

"Like a weakling like him could do that to me; I'm big and he's small." Bragged Kasimar.

"Well; he did defeat you." Smirked Eddie. "He switched the votes on you before the ceremony. Jimmy has a crush on Eleanor you see; and you should know that Jimmy doesn't like it when somebody upsets his friends to tears."

"Not at all." Nodded Barney.

"What… … …" Whispered Kasimar while sounding completely stunned.

"I think we've wasted enough time now; it's time for the real fun to start." Said Sasha with a snarl at Kasimar as she took out a remote and pressed a button.

Instantly metal binds emerged from the interviewee chair and Kasimar was completely restrained; he squirmed and struggled but he was unable to free himself.

"Oi! Let me out!" Threatened Kasimar. "I'll hurt you if you don't!"

"You don't seem to be in a position to make threats." Said Sasha as she pressed a red button on the remote.

ZAP!

Kasimar was electrocuted as electricity spread throughout the chair. He screamed in pain.

"My turn!" Grinned Eddie as Sasha passed him the remote.

ZAP!

"OW!" Wailed Kasimar.

"Come on guys; everyone gets a go; pass the remote around." Said Eddie as he gave the remote to Yessica.

ZAP

ZAP!

ZAP!

ZAP!

ZAP!

ZAP!

ZAP!

ZAP!

Kasimar was soon looking blackened and injured; he looked like he was about to cry.

Finally the remote came to Oscar.

"This is going to hurt you WAY more than it's going to hurt me." Grinned Oscar as he pressed the button hard.

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!

"Owwwww!" Wailed Kasimar as he began to cry.

"I think the remote is busted." Said Oscar. "The electrocution is stuck on."

"…Who cares?" Asked Xaria.

"I think before we end the show we can do one more thing." Grinned Eddie.

As the remote was handed back to Eddie he pressed a different button … and from the intercom around the room the SpongeBob Squarepants theme song began to play … loudly.

_Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?_

_SpongeBob Squarepants!_

"Nooooooooooooo!" Screamed Kasimar while still getting electrocuted.

"And that's about all the time we have." Said Sasha. "We hope you've enjoyed the show; I sure have. We'll be back in a few days with three new guests to interview so sit tight!"

"From me Eddie Lynmoire, goodnight." Said Eddie.

"And from me Sasha Tasset goodnight." Waved Sasha.

"And see you next time." Said Eddie and Sasha in usion.

"And we're off the air; good job you two." Said a camera intern.

The ex campers and audience minus Kasimar began to disperse but before Sasha got out the door Kasimar wailed.

"Let me out! Help!" Sobbed Kasimar.

"Don't worry; we'll come back and let you out … when we start to care." Smirked Sasha. "TTFN; ta tah for now!"

Sasha left the room while Kasimar screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Kasimar in great pain and despair.

* * *

And that's that! Kasimar and Nakia have both got what they deserve … and maybe more humiliation will be in store … maybe. I hope you all enjoyed the episode; let me know what you think by writing a review!

Next Time: Wallace is up to no good and it's up to the final five to stop him!


	54. Day 25, Part 1, Toy Ship

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his wonderful (but female dominated) fanfic Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story though; so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains a clam cannon 8000, a stuffed unicorn, a wannabe villain, evil laughter and a wimp. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Poll Results: **The poll has now been removed from my profile; here are the results. In first place is Spider with four votes. In joint second place are Eleanor and Lavender with two votes each. And in joint third place are Jimmy and Tabitha with one vote each. Thank you to everyone who voted!

**Note: **TDL is coming into the home stretch everyone! The chapter you are reading now is the tenth to last. Only nine more are left to be written! There is a good chance that by the time I'm done the story will be over 600 000 words long! I think I've certainly made my mark on the Total Drama fandom indeed. Now on with the show!

(Insert evil laughter here)

* * *

It was morning on Wawanakwa Island; the sun was shining like a sun normally would and there was not a single cloud in the sky. Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame and smiled for the camera and began to make grand gestures as he began the recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The final six experienced the calm before the storm in the form of messages from home. Jimmy got a lame message from his friends, Eleanor and Spider got messages from their parents while Lavender got a message from some of the cheerleaders on her team. Kasimar was cheered on by some of his gang members who seem nearly as bad as him … awesome! Tabitha meanwhile was congratulated on her strategy by her parents. They sure raised Tabitha well! Haha!"

"The challenge cost us a pretty penny and thankfully paid off big time! The final six were put into a virtual reality based on silent hill. They had two ways in which they could win. Either kill the most monsters … or be the last person standing. While most chose to defeat the monsters Kasimar took a different approach and picked off his competition one by one and sent them to their virtual deaths! Haha!"

"Lavender was sniped by Kasimar and Tabitha fell victim to a bio-mechanical spider known as Amnion, something Uzuri mentioned a fair while ago. And while that was going on Jimmy and Eleanor managed to take down pyramid head; the toughest and scariest monster in the entire Silent Hill series! I personally would have liked to see them scream in fear and began for mercy … but you can't have everything you want I suppose even though I deserve to."

"As the challenge went on Spider and Kasimar crossed paths; it ended badly for the sick guy when Kasimar bought the ceiling down no him, literally, which eliminated him from the challenge."

"Eventually Jimmy, Eleanor and Kasimar made it to the roof of the factory battlegrounds; Kasimar sniped Eleanor which meant it was a showdown between Jimmy and Kasimar, of good and evil. After a bullet went astray the whole place was sent on fire while Jimmy and Kasimar battled amongst the flames. In a shocking turn on events Jimmy was not only able to get the upper hand but he also defeated Kasimar … but not before cracking a bond one liner before landing the final blow."

"After the challenge Tabitha and Kasimar met up. As neither had immunity it was pretty certain that Kasimar was going. Tabitha told him to take out Eleanor to which Kasimar agreed. But Kasimar didn't just want to hurt Eleanor, he wanted to destroy her. Kasimar ended up throwing away what little chance of remorse he had and … killed one of Eleanor's baby ferrets! Wicked TV that was! Haha!"

"When Eleanor discovered Kasimar's vile deed she was horrified. Everyone vowed to vote out Kasimar; in fact, even Tabitha was shocked at what the bully did. Kasiamr threatened her into convincing the others to vote for Eleanor through the use of mind games. It looked like Tabitha was started to regret ever allying with Kasimar."

"Tabitha managed to convince Spider and Lavender to vote off Eleanor for her own good due to the trauma and emotional stress she was dealing with. She attempted to convince Jimmy but he refused due to his friendship and love for Eleanor … lame!"

"With four votes against her it looked like Eleanor's fate was sealed … but Jimmy was ready to help out his friend. He turned the tables on Kasiamr and switched the votes which made Kasiamr the one to get voted off … but not before suffering from some extreme pain and humiliation! You will be missed Kasimar … I would have disqualified Jimmy but this will be AWESOME for ratings!"

"With Kasiamr defeated and Tabitha alone in the game with no alliance and four people who are close friends it's obvious that the drama isn't quite over yet! Will Jimmy regret switching the votes? Will Eleanor manage to recover from her emotional blow? Will Spider ever find out Tabitha was the one responsible for both his allergy attack and Quana's elimination? And can anybody stop that pigeonholed villain? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous).

* * *

Tabitha felt surprisingly happy; Kasimar was gone! While at first she thought he would be a good ally as she could pay him to do stuff like a sort of gun for hire but she had come to _seriously_ regret ever allying with him. Tabitha may have been a cruel schemer … but she knew when to stop, she had limits … but Kasimar was practically Satan as far as she was concerned.

Now that Kasimar was gone Tabitha felt a great weight off her shoulders and could rest easy … and that's exactly what she was currently doing. Tabitha was dreaming peacefully as the sun shone into her cabin; Tabitha smiled in her sleep as she cuddled a stuffed unicorn. Tabitha had once said she didn't like unicorns but that was just so that nobody would get suspicious that she still slept with a toy at night. Of course; while she had shared a cabin with others she had hidden her stuffed plushie out of embarrassment.

"*Yawn*; what a peaceful sleep for a change." Said Tabitha sleepily as she slowly woke up.

"Morning Tabitha!" Said a cheerful voice from the door.

Tabitha 'eeped' in panic as she quickly hid the stuffed unicorn and looked to the doorway. Jimmy was standing there fully dressed and looking like he was in a good mood.

"Good morning Tabitha; it's the beginning of a new day, and for us and era of peace." Smiled Jimmy optimistically.

"How so?" Asked Tabitha.

"Isn't it obvious? Kasimar's gone! Finally we can rest easy; the last four challenges shouldn't be so bad now that Kasimar isn't here." Explained Jimmy.

"I quite agree; I was tiring of putting up with him. I have patience but there is only so much that I can take." Agreed Tabitha. "Now only five of us are left; I'm impressed that you've made it so far Jimmy; not bad for a ten year old."

"Aw shucks; it was nothing." Said Jimmy modestly.

"So; how is Eleanor doing?" Asked Tabitha in slight concern though her expression made it seem like more. "Is she ok?"

"Eleanor's a tough girl; she's made of stronger stuff than me." Assured Jimmy. "I can tell she's still sad about what happened, understandably so, but I think she's gonna be o-kuzay."

"Well that's good to here. Err … could you leave while I get changed?" Requested Tabitha. "Only that I don't like getting changed in front of other people."

"Oh, no problem, see you later Tabitha." Said Jimmy as he left.

* * *

**Confessional: Change the channel! Get it?**

**Tabitha: While I am glad Kasiamr is gone I have to wonder how it happened. I know for a fact there were four votes against Eleanor and judging by the sad looks on the faces of Spider and Lavender they voted for Eleanor as well … so how did she scrape through? I hate to say it but with Kasimar gone I'm at a bit of a disadvantage. It's definitely in my best interests to win immunity.**

**Jimmy: I didn't know Tabitha slept with a stuffed unicorn … I'll keep that info to myself as she'd be embarrassed if I told anyone … oops.**

* * *

Spider lay on his back on the grass near camp just looking up at the clouds and, for the first time in quite a while, felt peace of mind. With Kasimar's elimination he had outlasted all the people who wanted to permanently damage him; now he was in the final five and felt he could relax.

"This is great; no Nakia, no *cough* Kasimar, no worries. If only Quana were here to *cough* enjoy the tranquility." Said Spider with a little bit of regret. "Well; I guess I can avenge her *cough* elimination by winning; and even then, fifth place out of twenty six isn't that bad … ok look; that cloud looks like a *cough* duck."

* * *

**Confessional: I thought it looked like a chicken.**

**Spider: I've always enjoyed watching the** *cough*** clouds; it sooths the mind.**

* * *

As Spider silently gazed up at the clouds Eleanor walked up and lay down a few feet away from him.

"Hi Spider." Greeted Eleanor.

"Oh, hello Eleanor. You *cough* ok?" Asked Spider as she glanced over at his friend. "You were so upset yesterday; it was *cough* practically _killing_ me to see you cry; unlike Kasimar I really *cough* hate seeing people upset."

"I feel better now; I mean, I'm still upset … but if you focus on what you've left behind you'll never see what lies ahead I suppose … and I have some things I want to do before I win or lose." Said Eleanor while managing to smile. "But still; Kasimar really chipped away at my heart yesterday; how could he? If there are other people like him in the world … no; I mustn't think about it. I'm just glad he's gone."

"I guess that his cruelty and sadism *cough* was his own undoing; a demon cannot stay out of hell *cough* forever." Said Spider. "But still, I do wonder… err…"

"Something on your mind Spider?" Asked Eleanor.

"… I have a confessional Eleanor … and I hope you *cough* won't be angry." Said Spider hesitantly. "I … kinda voted for you yesterday … Tabitha decided *cough* it was for the *cough* best."

"I kind of figured that out by the looks on everyone's faces yesterday." Shrugged Eleanor. "Why did Tabitha suggest it though?"

"Because she thought you were suffering *cough* too much and didn't want you to have an *cough* emotional breakdown." Explained Spider. "All the same; I'm glad you didn't go."

"I guess I've got a guardian angel somewhere." Smiled Eleanor.

"Are you mad *cough* at us?" Asked Spider nervously.

"…No, I'm not." Said Eleanor in understanding. "You all did what you thought was best; it just shows that you care."

"Just so you know; Jimmy didn't *cough* vote for you." Said Spider as he stretched out. "He voted for Kasimar … I *cough* have to say I was impressed how he *cough* managed to knock Kasimar out."

"It's like he's a cannon made of glass." Remarked Eleanor. "He can dish it out but he can't take it. And it was really nice of Jimmy not to vote for me; he's such a wonderful friend…"

Spider noticed Eleanor growing a big smile on her face and a thought crossed his mind; did Eleanor have a crush on Jimmy? Spider thought for a moment and pushed the thought out of his head; it wasn't any of his business … but if Eleanor wanted help getting together Spider would have been more than happy to help … but probably not to the level of Barney!

* * *

**Confessional: Now with fifty percent more fibre!**

**Spider: Some people in this world think of love ***cough* **as a disease … but I think it's a wonderful ***cough*** thing … maybe Eleanor has a similar** *cough*** feeling of it.**

**Eleanor: I feel jiggly in my tummy. You see; Jimmy kissed me on the cheek last night … I think he thought I was asleep, but this raises a lot of questions. Does Jimmy like me? We've been friends since day one of the competition … but does he like me as more than a friend? I mean; he's sweet, kind and cute … but aren't I supposed to be too young to date someone? This pleasant tingly feeling isn't going away. What should I do? … Maybe I like Jimmy too … but how would I go about telling him? What if everybody laughs at me?**

* * *

Lavender was sitting in the Mess Hall eating breakfast. More specifically she was staring into space and thinking while her bowl of soggy cornflakes lay untouched on the table. Lavender quite enjoyed thinking to herself in silence when she had spare time; there was usually a lot on her mind … and after spending nearly four weeks on Wawanakwa island there was even more than usual to think about!

"_So I've made it to the final five … and I've outlasted Kasimar. Even if I don't win I think I can still call this experience a victory._" Thought Lavender in satisfaction. "_I've got so far in the contest, I've got a boyfriend who only lives a two hour drive from me, I outlasted the most horrible person I've ever met and now I'm the last person left from my team. All in all a pretty good summer_."

"Lavender; anyone home?" Asked a voice as a hand waved in front of her eyes.

Lavender was jerked back to reality and turned in the direction of the voice; sitting next to her was Tabitha.

"Oh, hi Tabitha … how long have you been trying to get my attention?" Asked Lavender.

"About twenty five seconds." Replied Tabitha with an amused smirk. "But that's not really important; I just want to say congratulations on outlasting Kasimar; it was about time that demon met his demise in the game."

"I totally agree; though you did suggest voting Eleanor off even if it was for the greater good." Reminded Lavender.

"And how I regret ever attempting it; I don't blame you for changing your vote." Said Tabitha as Chef placed a bowl of soggy cornflakes in front of her. "Ick!"

"Actually I didn't change my vote." Said Lavender.

"Really? But … at the very least it should have been a tie." Said Tabitha in confusion. "Shouldn't there have been a tie breaker?"

"I'm not sure … but is it really a bad thing Kasimar is gone?" Asked Lavender.

"…An excellent point." Agreed Tabitha. "I was actually afraid he was going to come after me next."

* * *

**Confessional: If he came after me I wouldn't have hesitated to bring out the pepper spray!**

**Tabitha: Something is going on here; why wasn't Eleanor voted off? In a way I'm glad it was Kasimar … but on the other hand I now have no alliance. I'll see if I can get to the bottom of this in hopefully as quick a time as Patch gets to the bottom of a box of doughnuts … ok; that was a pretty stupid joke I admit.**

**Lavender: Barney; I miss you … and I hope you've whacked Kasimar with your crutches. Love you!**

* * *

"Well Lavender; it's the final five, just four more days and it'll all be over." Said Tabitha as she 'hmmed' for a moment. "It feels almost like an eternity since we arrived on the island."

"And the best part is that neither Kasimar nor Nakia are here." Grinned Lavender. "Both of them got their karma; I guess it's true what they say. What goes around comes around."

"Indeed." Half agreed Tabitha. "You know; we have some common ground as of today."

"What do you mean Tabitha?" Asked Lavender.

"I mean that you and I are both the last remaining members of our respective teams. I'm all that remains of Team Jungle and you are all that remains of Team Grenade." Explained Tabitha. "On the other hand Spider, Jimmy and Eleanor are all from Team Puzzle. I think it would be a good idea to team up to vote one of them out."

"That makes sense … but they're my friends." Replied Lavender.

"I can see that; but they could easily work together and pick us off one after the other. How about this; we both vote for one of them at tonight's ceremony. It's absolutely nothing personal."

"… Well…" Mumbled Lavender as she thought for a moment. "…Deal."

Tabitha and Lavender shook hands to seal the deal.

* * *

**Confessional: Deals on wheels!**

**Tabitha: Lavender might actually be someone I could tolerate working with. She's smart and she isn't a sociopath. Still; this deal is only up until the final three, she'd be too risky to face in the final challenge one on one. I'm confident that I can convince one of the other three to vote for somebody else so it'll work like this; one opponent gone by the end of today. A likely tie tomorrow that I'll win. And in the final three I team up with whoever is left to take out Lavender. Then I simply beat my last opponent in the finals. There may be variables but I feel confident this should work.**

**Lavender: I like everyone who's left so it's going to be hard voting somebody off. But in these shows only one will win … I'm hoping it's me, but at the same time the others deserve to win as well. Being in the final five is tough!**

* * *

A short while later Jimmy, Eleanor and Spider entered the mess hall. Spider sat down with Lavender and Tabitha to talk with them while Jimmy got his breakfast and sat down next to Eleanor. He still felt tingly in his tummy from giving her a peck on the cheek the previous night. What Jimmy didn't know was that Eleanor had still been awake and knew what he'd done.

"Good morning Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy. "Did you sleep well?"

"…I certainly did." Smiled Eleanor sweetly. "I owe you so much Jimmy; you've always been there for me through thick and thin throughout the competition."

"That's what friends are for." Replied Jimmy with his usual cheerful smile. "You haven't touched your breakfast; Chef even made you fruit salad after what happened yesterday."

Sure enough Eleanor had a bowl of fruit salad in front of her instead of soggy cornflakes though she hadn't eaten any.

"Sorry; it's just that I still feel a little depressed after what Kasimar did." Explained Eleanor with a sad sigh. "I've … never had anything close to me die before. I'll get over it … but I feel like a part of me has moved on to the next world."

"I understand." Nodded Jimmy as he put a hand on Eleanor's shoulder to cheer her up. "But Kasimar is gone now; he'll never hurt you again. If he does I'll bring out wonder bat."

"Wonder bat?" Asked Eleanor while quizzically raising an eyebrow.

"Oh; it's a bat Charles invented for Ted when he challenged some tough kids to a baseball game with a hundred dollar bet involved. It basically hits super hard and has a few … special attachments. Needless to say it, but I'll go ahead and say it anyway, it would be agonizing to get hit in the crotch with it. If Kasimar makes you cry again,. or indeed even says and unkind word to you, then I'll do just that."

"…Thanks Jimmy; I really appreciate that." Cooed Eleanor softly as she began to eat her fruit salad. "Do you want some of this?"

"No thanks; you have it, I'll be like grandpa in the war and make do and mend." Assured Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Back in the war … Uncle Albert says that a lot doesn't he?**

**Eleanor:** (She is blushing).** My heart was racing back there … maybe I do l**_**ike**_** Jimmy. He's as nice, kind and pure as Kasimar is bad, evil and tainted. **

**Jimmy: I know cheating is wrong … but I think I did the right thing switching the votes on Kasimar.**

* * *

While Jimmy was in the confessional Tabitha had been leaning against it while waiting for her turn. She didn't really bother listening since Jimmy was just ten and probably wouldn't have much useful information … but then she heard Jimmy mention switching the votes on Kasimar. Tabitha froze and looked stunned.

"_He switched the votes_?" Thought Tabitha in bewilderment. "_He of all people? That little weasel! … And yet; I have to admire his bravery and nerve_."

Jimmy exited the confessional and headed back to the mess hall. He waved to Tabitha as he went; Tabitha waved back and entered the confessional.

* * *

**Confessional: 'Switch' the lights off! Get it?**

**Tabitha: So **_**that's**_** what happened; I **_**knew**_** something was up! To be honest I'm quite grateful Jimmy did that … there has to be a way I can use this to my advantage. I can't blackmail him; blackmailing children is not something I do. Hmm; I'll think of something.**

* * *

Chris had gathered the five remaining campers in the center of camp. Today he wasn't wearing any additional accessories or a special costume.

"Well you guys; you've made it to the final five. That is very impressive considering one of you is a sick cripple and two of you are dumb children! Haha!" Laughed Chris meanly.

"Just get on *cough* with it." Said Spider in slight irritation.

"Fine! Before we start today's challenge I'd like each of you to use the confessional and tell the viewing world how you feel about making it as far as you have. You can make shout outs to friends and family if you want to." Explained Chris. "Basically do what you did when it was the final ten but make it better."

* * *

**Confessional: Twenty one down, four to go!**

**Lavender: I feel happy that I've made it this far in the contest. I've definitely proven cheerleaders don't have to be stupid or mean, it's just a dumb stereotype. I hope to make it all the way, but if not … I still outlasted Kasimar! Raven, Xaria, Mable and Oscar, you guys were great team mates! And Barney; I hope you have a big kiss ready for me when I win. **(Lavender flirtatiously winks to the camera).

**Eleanor: It's been a long journey to get to this point but I think I've done alright. Kasimar may have reduced me to tears … and hurt my feelings a lot … but I'm here and he's not. Quana, you were a great friend, I wish you were still here! Barney; you were a whole lot of fun, I hope your leg gets better soon! Win or lose I can say I've had an overall great time … but I have my eye on something other than the prize.**

**Tabitha: I feel I've played a smart strategic game. I've survived a lot of elimination ceremonies, I've manipulated the votes to go my way, and I'm the only member of my team who made the final ten, that has to count for something. I'm pretty sure I can win this; just four more days and victory will be mine. Uzuri … you're undeniably a freak but I do admit you were useful … so thanks. Nakia; get a life! And Kasimar … you a sick sadistic sociopath, I wish I'd never allied with you!**

**Jimmy: Yeah! Final five! I guess you don't have to be mean or schemish to get far in life huh? I've made a lot of friends during my time here and I'm grateful for their friendship and help. What's more, Eleanor's here with me! Maybe I'll become the youngest person to win a reality show; that could be a world record! Ted, Pablo, Charles and Ricky … get on the internet and add things to watching on Ebay, we're gonna be rich!**

**Spider: I never thought I'd get** *cough*** this far. I've had an allergic reaction, been attacked, had ***sneeze*** several injuries and I've fainted as well. And yet … this has been the** *cough*** best experience of my life! I found love, I've got friends and ***cough* **I learned to stand up** *cough*** for myself. Quana; I love you very much and I hope you're enjoying** *sneeze*** the playa! Barney … how can I ever thank you for all the support you've** *gag*** given me? And everyone who's out besides Nakia and ***cough*** Kasimar; be proud you had a go. I bet we'll remember this adventure for ***sneeze* **the rest of our lives.**

* * *

"Finally! Took you guys long enough!" Whined Chris once Spider exited the confessional. "I'm a busy guy with lots of things to do!"

"I doubt that." Said Tabitha flatly.

"Me too." Agreed Eleanor.

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; listen up because I'm going to announce your twenty-fifth challenge. Today's challenge is going to be hard, no joke."

"So what do you have to do that is 'hard'." Asked Lavender.

"You all remember Wallace right?" Asked Chris. "You know, ginger hair, manical laughter, over the top villain?"

"How could we *cough* forget?" Mumbled Spider.

"We'll; it looks like he's up to no good once again!" Grinned Chris. "He's up at the top of the thousand foot cliff concocting a nefarious evil plan. For some reason Carlton is with him as well."

"Huh? Why would Carlton hang out with Wallace? He's terrified of everything!" Exclaimed Lavender.

"Heck if I know." Shrugged Chris. "Evil is evil I suppose. Anyway; your challenge for today is to stop Wallace's evil plan. You can do it in any way you want, either way the person to successfully defeat him wins immunity from tonight's Bonfire Ceremony."

"So how would you recommend defeating him?" Asked Eleanor.

"I could tell you … but I much rather watch you squirm as you figure it out for yourself! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Ok; on your marks, get set … … … GO!"

The five campers took off running towards the thousand foot cliff while not knowing somebody was watching them from a fair distance away.

* * *

**Confessional: Stop that pigeon, err, villain!**

**Spider: This challenge seems pretty hard; Wallace** *cough*** is not only nuts but also very** *cough*** intelligent … that's a dangerous** *sneeze*** combination.**

**Eleanor: According to the SpongeBob show 'evil' is an acronym. It stands for 'Every Villain Is Lemons'. That's pretty silly in my opinion.**

* * *

From the top of the thousand foot cliff Wallace watched the five remaining campers. He was able to see them because he was using a pair of hi tech 'evil' binoculars.

"So … it appears that five pansy good guys are going to try and thwart my plan. …This'll be fun! Mwahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

"Why did you bring me?" Asked Carlton as he stood nearby with his hands in his pockets. "I'm no good at evil and I'm terrified of heights!"

"Because I needed to bring back up for when the final five arrive to try and stop me." Explained Wallace. "And also because it pains me to see a guy who is so afraid that even his shadow would scare him senseless."

"How did you know?" Asked Carlton meekly.

Wallace blinked behind his new sunglasses and continued.

"I'm going to toughen you out if it's the last thing I do … and it probably will be." Muttered Wallace. "Anyway; I want a henchman, somebody I can use to spread evil around the world … and you fit the bill nicely. Mwahahahahaha!"

"Don't do that!" Cowered Carlton.

"Look! You can't run away from your fears forever! You have to face them and wedgie them because that's the evil thing to do!" Exclaimed Wallace. "And besides; evil impresses ladies … well; it said so in a YouTube comment so it _must_ be true! Any girls you like?"

"Love is scary." Whimpered Carlton though he blushed in the _faintest_ possible shade.

"Who do you like?" Asked Wallace before grinning. "Tell me or I'll throw you over the cliff! Mwahahahahaha!"

"Please don't!" Pleaded Carlton before he composed himself. "Well … Fifi is kind of cute…"

"Well by the end of the day I'll toughen you out and make you as bad a bad guy as I am! Mwuhahaha!" Cackled Wallace evilly.

* * *

**Confessional: Wallace is such a wannabe at being evil. **(rolls eyes).

**Wallace: Making Carlton grow some balls will be tough … but I will make him the next Dick Dastardly or my name isn't Wallace William Magenta!**

**Carlton: Wallace knocked me out back at the Playa Des losers … when I came to I was on the island. …Why me?**

* * *

"So; since we have some spare time … want to see my new evil invention?" Asked Wallace with a devious grin.

"Do I have a choice?" Asked Carlton hopefully.

"Nope! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace. "Behold! The Clam Cannon 8000!"

Wallace pulled a blood red sheet off something and thus the 'evil invention' was revealed. It was a large cannon with several clam shapes imprinted on it; it had a control seat and the cannon seemed to be able to rotate.

"So … what do you think?" Asked Wallace.

"Err … it looks powerful and dangerous." Said Carlton shakily while hoping Wallace wouldn't fire any clams at him.

"Want to know how it works?" Asked Wallace with a grin.

"…Err … ok." Shrugged Carlton.

"You see; when I flip the on switch the clam cannon 8000 will turn on! After that I get in the control seat and set it for clam storm mode; after that I aim into the sky … and KABOOM! Smelly flaming clams will soon rain al over the island and everyone will have to clean up the mess which will be boring and tedious … and I'll laugh at them while they clean it! Mwahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace like a maniac in a metal asylum.

"That's insane!" Exclaimed Carlton.

"I'm glad you think so." Said Wallace in a flattered tone. "Anyway; once the goody two shoes brigade arrive I'll switch on the cannon and bring about a CLAMAGEDON! Mwahahaha!"

"Wouldn't it make more sense to activate it before they have a chance to stop you?" Asked Carlton. "Though I don't really want anything bad to happen.

"Sense has been removed from the dictionary; I said so during the talent show. Anyway; I can't activate my evil clam cannon 8000 until they arrive; I have to give the goody two shoes brigade a chance to defeat me." Explained Wallace.

"…Why?" Asked Carlton in confusion.

"It's the bad guy code." Explained Wallace simply.

* * *

**Confessional: Bad guys have a code of honor? That's odd.**

**Wallace: By the end of the day Wawanakwa will be littered with thousands of smelly clams! It'll have to be renamed Clamanakwa! Mwahahahaha!**

**Carlton: … I think Wallace is insane. **(Carlton gulps).

* * *

Oh no! Wallace is going to use his (evil fanfare) Clam Cannon 8000 to cover Wawanakwa in clams! Oh heavens! Can the final five stop Wallace in time? Or is Wawanakwa going to become a clam zoo? And who will be voted off and finish in fifth place? Find out in the next chapter!

This challenge idea belongs to Frank15.


	55. Day 25, Part 2, Wallace's 'evil' plan

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his excellent story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains land mines, tennis ball turrets, a clam cannon, evil laughter, a toy ship and lots of laughs. Nothing M rated thought nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender **JimmyxEleanor **AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **Total Drama Letterz has topped the fourteen thousand hits mark! Thank you to everyone who has read the story and made it become this popular. Other than that good news I don't have much to say besides enjoy the chapter!

Clam Cannon 8000 activate!

* * *

"The final five are on their way." Murmured Carlton as he sat on the grass while Wallace paced in front of him. "They might hurt us … shouldn't you build a force field or something?"

"I'm afraid not; using a force field is as noobish as camping in X-box online." Replied Wallace as he continued pacing. "Now; we should have a little while until jimmy goody two shoes and his little entourage arrive so I think we should use that time to our advantage."

"By planting traps?" Guessed Carlton. "Don't make them lethal please."

"I didn't mean that; besides, I've already put a number of traps along the path so they'll be hard pressed to even reach us." Said Wallace dismissively before he grinned. "I'm going to using the time between now and the good versus evil battle to toughen you up! Mwahahahahaha!"

"Oh no!" Whimpered Carlton.

"Oh yes!" Cackled Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional: Tough as titanium he is not!**

**Wallace: Maybe Carlton should grow a moustache; all tough men have them, yours truly included. Mwahahahaha! Man, evil laughter feels as grrrrreat as frosties.**

* * *

"Ok then; here's your first lesson to becoming brave, tough, evil and strong." Said Wallace as he stopped pacing. "You see a small child with a cut on his arm crying next to a lemonade stand … what do you do?"

"Buy him some lemonade?" Guessed Carlton.

"No! Wrong, wrong, wrong!" Said Wallace with a shake of his head. "You steal a lemon from the lemonade stand and squeeze the juice into his cut!"

"That sounds scary." Whimpered Carlton. "And isn't that mean?"

"Exactly; if you want to be tough and brave you have to be assertive every once in a while." Explained Wallace patiently. "Here's another scenario. You are at a fancy restaurant with relatives; the violin band is playing, the food is great, romance is in the air. Your posh uncle in a smart tux asks for the mustard … what do you do?"

"Err … squirt it on the table cloth?" mumbled Carlton.

"A better answer than last time … but no!" Said Wallace with an evil grin. "You squirt the mustard across the table and into his eyes! And let me tell you; mustard really stings the eyes apparently."

* * *

**Confessional: Mustard is one hot condiment! **

**Carlton: I wanna go home! Wallace means well … but I'm not a nasty guy!**

**Wallace: I'm not making Carlton evil … though that would be great! I'm simply teaching him how to be assertive. Consider him Whitey to my Spike minus the muscles … and the fact he isn't a rat.**

* * *

The final five contestants still in the game had quickly reached the base of the thousand foot cliff. Wallace was definitely at the top waiting to commence battle with them. All they had to do was make it to the top of the large cliff … doing that would probably be FAR easier said than done as Wallace was known for his cheating; who knew what tricks and traps he would have in store for them?

"So … I guess we've got to get to the top of the cliff." Said Lavender. "Just so you guys know; Wallace is insane. Don't let him out of your site for a second. It may very well be the last thing you do … before you're thrown off the cliff and into the water far below."

"He isn't as evil as Kasimar is he?" Asked Jimmy. "He did try and attack me, Eleanor and Spider back in the theme song challenge so I'm not too sure."

"I wouldn't worry too much; he's insane but he isn't a sociopath … he's just crazy." Assured Lavender.

"I guess we should get going then." Said Tabitha as she began to walk up the grassy side of the cliff. "May the best contestant win."

* * *

**Confessional: That would be me … except that I'm not allowed to compete.**

**Tabitha: By which I mean me.**

**Jimmy: I like Tabitha; she's a good sport. I guess the whole stereotype of rich people being mean is wrong. Pablo breaks that stereotype as well.**

* * *

"Wait Tabitha." Said Jimmy. "Shouldn't we formulate a plan first? We'd have a better chance of success."

"I completely agree; but only one of us can win immunity." Reasoned Tabitha. "In the long run it wouldn't do much good to make a plan. Besides; who says Wallace doesn't have an 'evil' invention that would allow him to hear our entire plan?"

* * *

**Confessional: Does he?**

**Wallace: Curses! She predicted my next move! Now my Eavesdropper 2000 will go to waste!**

* * *

"I guess you have a point." Said Jimmy with a smile.

"Hey guys; look over there." Said Eleanor as she pointed towards a rock just a few meters away.

Lying next to the rock were a few weapons made from everyday objects; a shotgun made from pipes, a tazer made from a cell phone, a firecracker launcher built from a salvaged bike chassis, a hi tech looking torch and even a sort of gun built from a small traffic cone and some wood. Next to the weapons was a note. Lavender walked over and picked the note up.

"Hmm; what's this?" Asked Lavender as she began to read what was written on the note. "Dear goody two shoes good guys; Mwahahaha, I'm back baby! If you're feeling brave or foolish or maybe both then meet me at the top of the thousand foot cliff for a showdown in order to stop me from using my Clam Cannon 8000. I'll be waiting. To give you a sporting chance to defeat me you can use these weapons I built while I was at the Playa. And don't worry; they won't actually kill anyone. There's a difference between neutral evil and chaotic evil you know. Mwahahahahaha! From Wallace."

"Why would he want to risk *cough* being defeated?" Asked Spider in confusion. "Then again I *cough* don't pretend to understand how an evil genius's mind *cough* works."

* * *

**Confessional: It works by solar power!**

**Spider: I always wondered why** *cough*** villains wanted their adversaries to get even with** *sneeze*** them. Is it for the thrill or** *cough*** something?**

* * *

"Heck if I know." Shrugged Tabitha as she picked up the cell phone tazer. "Let's just arm ourselves and defeat the mad man."

The others quickly chose their weapons and here is what each of them had. Spider had the pipe shotgun, Jimmy had the traffic cone pistol, Lavender had the bicycle fire cracker launcher and Eleanor had the hi-tech looking torch.

"Chaaaaaaaarge!" Yelled Jimmy as he took off running up the steep cliff while Tabitha and Lavender followed close behind with Spider and Eleanor bringing up the rear.

"What happens when we *cough* get to Wallace?" Asked Spider as he ran with the others.

"I guess we'll have to wing it." Said Eleanor as she readied her torch. "Besides; Wallace isn't exactly a powerhouse and I don't think Carlton will want to fight us anyway."

"Good point." Agreed Spider. "But what about his *cough* clam cannon?"

"…That might be a problem." Said Eleanor with realization.

* * *

**Confessional: Well if that isn't an understatement I don't know what is!**

**Eleanor: Clam's are gross! Then again they aren't as bad as peanuts I suppose.**

**Jimmy: You know; this challenge is kind of like a video game. Stop the bad guy and save the world! Well; I'd say that it's more like saving the island, but it's the same general concept.**

* * *

Wallace was tossing stones off the edge of the cliff into the water below with Carlton; Wallace was trying to get Carlton to face his fear of heights. Carlton was shivering in fear but wasn't trying to run away, in Wallace's eyes this was a clear sign of making progress.

"This is nice isn't it." Said Wallace casually.

"I suppose it is … but I hope the rocks aren't hurting any of the animals." Mumbled Carlton.

"All the better if they are! Mwahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly. "Personally I'd rather throw bombs but they'd explode before hitting the water so it would be a waste."

"You're mad! Hurting people isn't fun! It's sadism!" Said Carlton disapprovingly.

"Well I AM a bad guy." Said Wallace. "Besides; I wouldn't have done what Kasimar did to Eleanor; I have standards. Trust me kid; stick with me and you'll transform into Macho Carlton in no time! Mwahahahaha!"

"I'm happy being regular Carlton." Replied Carlton uncertainly.

"You can't go through life being so afraid of everything you know." Said Wallace as he tossed another stone down below. "Having fear is natural, and fun to exploit may I add, but the amount of fear you have isn't normal. Is your Y chromosome made of jelly or something?"

"It's not like I can help my fears Wallace." Sighed Carlton sadly. "You see; I have one of the worst cases of Panophobia doctors have ever heard of. Do you know what it's like going through life scared of everything? If I could be braver I would be in a heartbeat! But my condition stops me from doing that; it's beyond my control."

"…That explains a lot." Said Wallace in an actually _sympathetic_ tone. "Man; I don't know what I'd do if I feared everything. I'd be scared of bombs, evil and even James Bond. That'd suck."

"Why do you care?" Asked Carlton with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you were evil."

"The biggest baddest bad guys in history and fiction always treat their henchmen properly." Explained Wallace before cackling. "Anyway; I'm in a _very_ evil mood! I think it's time to play go fish!"

"I don't see what's so evil about that." Said Carlton in confusion.

* * *

**Confessional: Got any threes? … What do you mean 'go fish'?**

**Wallace: Obviously I'm going to cheat! I've been cheating at go fish since kindergarten. I always won an extra dollar of lunch money everyday! Mwahahahahaha!**

**Carlton: Wallace is crazy … but he's my friend … sorta. I'd like to toughen up … but I doubt I can do it. **(A spider descends from the ceiling on a string of spider web). **Ah! Help! It's a spider!**

* * *

"This … could be a problem." Said Lavender as she looked further up the steep grassy cliff.

A short distance ahead was some turrets; they were turning by themselves and had shot a seagull out of the air with a high velocity tennis ball. Wallace's evil inventions were very makeshift … but they certainly did what they were supposed to indeed.

"It looks like Wallace has left a couple of obstacles to hinder our progress … maybe he's not as crazy as I thought." Pondered Lavender. "I doubt we could sneak around them. Does anybody have any ideas how to get past them? While only one of us can win immunity I think it's in our best interests to work together for now."

"I say we use our weapons on the turrets." Suggested Eleanor.

"Great idea Eleanor; I like your thinking." Complimented Jimmy nicely.

"Thanks." Said Eleanor shyly.

* * *

**Confessional: I like raspberry cake!**

**Wallace: Using the weapons on the turret is EXACTLY what they were supposed to do. It's not rocket science … robotic science is **_**much**_** eviler! Mwahahahahaha!**

**Tabitha: Spider, Eleanor and Lavender were focusing on taking out the turrets while Jimmy and myself were covering them … I thought this would be a great time to subtly throw Jimmy off his game. Nothing personal; but I need to win immunity.**

* * *

"So Jimmy; it's great to finally do a challenge without having to watch out for Kasimar isn't it?" Said Tabitha to start conversation. "I am ashamed I even considered voting Eleanor off; it may have been for the greater good … but I was wrong to suggest it."

"Don't worry about it Tabitha." Said Jimmy reassuringly. "You just thought you were doing the right thing, that's perfectly fine."

"I was getting afraid as to what Kasimar would do next … he may have switched the votes on me."

Jimmy blinked and looked a _small_ bit uneasy.

"Would he have done that?" Asked Jimmy nervously.

"Maybe; only a cheater and bad person would switch the votes." Said Tabitha casually. "But now that Kasimar is gone we don't have to worry about that."

"Yeah … we don't." Murmured Jimmy.

"But Kasimar aside; do you know what really impresses me?" Asked Tabitha with a false admiring smile.

"Not really." Said Jimmy while thinking about what Tabitha had said.

"That you've got so far in the game and never said or done a single bad thing." Said Tabitha nicely. "I guess meanness isn't in your blood. I bet your parents will be very proud of you."

Before Jimmy could respond the sound of a few explosions was heard. The turrets had been taken out and were now in pieces.

"Onward troops!" Joked Eleanor as she ran up ahead.

"Ready to stop the cheating bad guy?" Asked Tabitha to Jimmy.

"…I guess." Said Jimmy with an uneasy look on his face.

* * *

**Confessional: Nobody is perfect; but sometimes doing the wrong thing is actually the **_**right**_** thing to do.**

**Tabitha: Nothing personal; but Jimmy is actually a threat at this point. If I can throw him off his game then it'll be easier for me to win immunity.**

**Jimmy: **(He looks very haunted). **Is cheating something Kasimar would do? And what will mum and dad think. I cheated … Kasimar was truly horrible … but cheating is something he would do, and I've done it. … What have I done?**

* * *

A little further up the thousand foot cliff the three teens, one preteen and one kid came across a sign with a skull on it.

"'Danger, mine field'." Read Spider nervously. "Would Wallace *cough* actually use mines? They could kill *cough* us!"

"Does anybody see a minesweeper Wallace might have left for us?" Asked Eleanor hopefully.

"I don't think he's being as generous this time." Lamented Jimmy in a troubled voice.

"Is something wrong Jimmy?" Asked Eleanor.

"Don't worry; it's nothing." Assured Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Jimmy has a nice hat!**

**Jimmy: Tabitha doesn't know it … but she's really got me thinking. Why did I cheat? I mean; I did it to save Eleanor … but will anybody want to be friends with a cheater? **(Jimmy rests his head in his hands and looks distraught).

**Lavender: Seriously Wallace … mines? You're horrible!**

**Wallace: I love a good compliment on how evil I am! Mwahahahahaha!**

* * *

"So … what should we do?" Asked Eleanor as she idly flipped her torch on and off.

BANG!

Part of the ground exploded; a mine must have been buried there.

"Eleanor; I think your torch has the ability to trigger the mines!" exclaimed Tabitha. "How about you get in front of us and set off the mines; it'll be safer that way."

"Good idea Tabitha." Nodded Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: That bomb is 'mine'!**

**Eleanor: There are so many mine related jokes I could make … but most of them are pretty groan inducing.**

* * *

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

The mines were set off one by one by Eleanor's torch as she led the other four of the final five through the mine field.

"The mines are a bit loud; but other than that this isn't really so bad." Remarked Lavender.

"Yeah; I guess Wallace didn't really *cough* think his plan through- whoa!" Eeped Spider as he tripped over his feet and feel to the ground.

If you are familiar with Spider's usual luck then what happened next will be absolutely no surprise to you whatsoever.

BANG!

Spider had fallen onto a mine that hadn't been detonated by Eleanor's torch. He was thrown up into the air with a wail and landed with a hard 'thud' and lay dazed on the ground.

"Spider! Are you ok?" Asked Lavender in concern.

"Do you need medical attention?" Asked Tabitha.

"Don't worry; I'll *cough* be fine." Assured Spider. "I knew I wouldn't win immunity *cough* anyway. You guys go and stop Wallace; I'll watch *cough* the clouds until the pain in my spine *sneeze* stops."

"Are you sure?" Asked Jimmy.

"As I said; I'll *sneeze* be fine." Assured Spider again.

"Well … ok. We'll see you later I guess." Waved Eleanor as she, Tabitha, Jimmy and Lavender quickly continued up the cliff.

* * *

**Confessional: Watch out for land mine number sixty three, it's a tricky one!**

**Spider: Chef arrived after a few** *cough*** minutes and took me back to camp … I get hurt** *cough*** a lot don't I?**

**Chris: And it's funny! Haha!**

**Jimmy: Poor Spider.**

**Tabitha: That looked like it hurt … but it's one less person in the running for immunity.**

**Carlton: Those explosions sounds were scary! I don't like sound noises.**

**Wallace: Mwahahahahaha! One down and four to go!**

* * *

"Have the explosions stopped now?" Asked Carlton shakily as he covered his ears. "They sound even worse than fireworks!"

"Yes they've stopped … and come to think of it; I should have bought some fireworks along that spell rude words! That would be so evil! Mwahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace like an evil maniac as he threw his arms up.

"Can I go back to the playa yet?" Asked Carlton hopefully.

"Nope!" Laughed Wallace. "I still have to toughen you up."

"How are you going to do it this time?" Groaned Carlton.

"I could lock you in a room with Uzuri; she's super scary!" Suggested Wallace while rubbing his hands together devilishly.

"No! Anything but that! SAW makes me wet the bed!" Wailed Carlton pitifully.

"Ok, how about this … I teach you how to make X-ray glasses for you to use when the cheerleaders are getting changed." Smirked Wallace.

"…Ew! That perverted!" Cringed Carlton.

"That's what makes it evil!" Pointed out Wallace. "Mwahahahahahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Evil weevil!**

**Chef: That Wallace kid is nuts!**

**Wallace: **(He is eating a packet of peanuts). **You are what you eat! Mwahahahaha!**

**Chris: He so totally stole that joke from Robbie the Reindeer … but who the hell cares? Haha!**

* * *

"We're nearly there everyone!" Said Lavender happily as she readied her bicycle firecracker launcher. "May the best competitor win immunity. I'm pretty sure tonight's vote is going to be hard."

"You've got that right." Agreed Eleanor. "What do you think Jimmy?"

"…I have no idea who I'll vote for." Replied Jimmy while trying not to let his guiltiness show. "I'm friends with everyone still here."

'Maybe you should flip a coin." Suggested Tabitha.

"I've actually done that before when I haven't been able to decide." Revealed Jimmy. "There are some I would never vote for … but losing this far into the game must feel very disappointing."

"All the better since it was Kasimar who got voted off." Smiled Eleanor.

"…Exactly." Nodded Jimmy while inwardly feeling conflicted due to what Tabitha had said.

"Good riddance." Agreed Tabitha.

There was a small rumble that all four of the campers both heard and felt.

"What was that?" Asked Eleanor.

"It feels like a rockslide." Noted Tabitha.

"It's probably nothing to worry about." Shrugged Lavender before raising no eyebrow. "Why do you look like you've seen a ghost?"

"Lavender! Look out!" Yelled Jimmy.

Lavender turned and immediately knew why the others looked afraid. It would however have been in her best interests to have looked a few seconds earlier.

KER-CRUSH!

Lavender was flattened by a boulder that had been rolled down from the top of the cliff; when the boulder rolled off her and further down the cliff a Lavender shaped hole was imprinted where the red headed cheerleader had been standing a few moments prior.

"Are you alright Lavender?" Asked Jimmy.

"Does she look alright?" Asked Tabitha flatly.

Lavender slowly sat up from within the hole and had a look on her face that made it clear she was currently dazed and on another planet.

"Wheeee! I'm a turtle!" Slurred Lavender in a daze as she fell backwards into the hole.

"… I think Lavender's out of the challenge." Said Eleanor with an 'eep'. "How on earth did Wallace get a boulder to the top of the cliff in the first place?"

"All villains can break the laws of physics I guess." Pondered Jimmy. "Maybe we should stay here and make sure Lavender doesn't get hit by anymore boulders."

"I think she'll be ok." Said Tabitha confidently. "If she can put up with Kasimar's bullying and win immunity so many times I think she'll survive this."

"Are you sure?" Asked Eleanor.

"Positive." Assured Tabitha. "Now it seems to me that we're very nearly at the top of the cliff; it's time to put a stop to Wallace's evil plan."

"I wonder if his clam cannon was just a bluff; I hope so." Gulped Eleanor.

"What's the worst that high velocity clams could do?" Asked Jimmy. "And just so you know; that was a rhetorical question."

* * *

**Confessional: In SpongeBob Squarepants clams are like birds … SpongeBob and Patrick raised one once. Hilarity ensued.**

**Tabitha: With only two kids left to go against I think I've got this challenge in the bag.**

**Eleanor: Why do people have to be over the top villains? Why not over the top good guys?**

**Jimmy: **(He appears to be in very deep thought). **Maybe cheating was for the best … but do I deserve to win when my remaining competition all played fairly and I haven't. Having a conscience is both a gift and a curse.**

* * *

"Ok; let's try something else." Said Wallace with a sigh.

Carlton was proving to be a very tough apprentice to teach. He was as soft as a bloomin marshmallow! Wallace aimed to make him as hard as diamond.

"How about this; I could take your to the yearly villain convention with me this year; that way you'll surely toughen up! Besides; watching the monster fights is always cool!" Exclaimed Wallace.

"M-m-m-monsters?" Asked Carlton with a gulp.

"Just a few things other villains put together with animal DNA extracts." Explained Wallace. "I personally prefer robotics, this year I intend to market my Ninja Lawn Gnome Samurai; never again will kids be able to play childish games on the lawn! Mwahahahahaha!"

"Aaargh! Not lawn gnomes." Wailed Carlton in terror.

"Don't tell me you've got gnomophobia." Sighed Wallace as he face palmed.

Before Carlton could respond the sound of some weapons cocking could be heard. Wallace and Carlton turned to the sound of the noise and saw Jimmy, Eleanor and Tabitha standing a short distance away and aiming their weapons at them.

"We're here to thwart you Wallace!" Announced Jimmy.

"Oh goody! This ought to be fun!" Cackled Wallace evilly. "Mwahahahahahahahahaha!"

* * *

**Confessional: Good VS Evil round 2!**

**Wallace: Time to defeat the goody two shoes twosome and manipulative snake! I'm going to carry out my evil plan! Mwahahahahaha!**

* * *

Wallace easily dodged the blasts that Tabitha, Jimmy and Eleanor fired at him; Wallace threw a stick of what looked like dynamite at them and dived behind the clam cannon.

"Run!" Yelled Eleanor as the fuse got smaller.

BOOM!

The dynamite exploded and left a black scorch mark where it had been before it detonated.

"Are you insane?" Asked Tabitha as she blasted a shot at Wallace.

"Most people would agree." Smirked Wallace. "Give me a hand Carlton!"

Carlton was cowering behind a rock and peeped out.

"No way! I'm scared of fights!" Whimpered Carlton.

"Take this!" Yelled Jimmy as he fired his weapon and an apple was blasted out; it conked Wallace square on the forehead.

"…Right; I'm upset now!" Growled Wallace as he leapt up into the control seat of the clam cannon. "Maybe a pearl will be compensation for getting hit by smelly clams that smell like fish!"

"Fish smells nice though." Replied Eleanor.

"Well I'm sure you'll enjoy getting buried by clams then!" Cackled Wallace as he switched clam cannon on. "Get a load of this!"

Wallace fired out a blast of clams which seemed to purposely miss Eleanor. Tabitha snuck behind the cannon raising her pipe shotgun to whack at Wallace.

"I see you!" Grinned Wallace as he swiveled the cannon around to face Tabitha. "This! Is! Sparta!"

Wallace fired a blast of clams right at Tabitha which sent her flying through the air backwards … and over the edge of the cliff.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRrrrrgh." Screamed Tabitha as she fell with her screams becoming quieter due to distance until she hit the water with a splash.

"Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace in evil triumph. "Nobody can defeat me! I'm evil and nobody better mess with me!"

* * *

**Confessional: I hope she landed in the safe zone; those sharks carry traces of herpes!**

**Tabitha: **(She looks enraged). **I'm going to **_**kill**_** Wallace! Arrrgh!**

* * *

Wallace swiveled his clam cannon around to face Jimmy; Jimmy aimed his weapon at Wallace at prepared to fire.

"Some good that will do; the clam cannon 8000 is apple proof!" Bragged Wallace.

Jimmy shrugged and fired an apple; it went right down the turret of the cannon; a second later Wallace fired the cannon … he shouldn't have done that!

BOOM!

The clam cannon exploded into pieces and Wallace lay on the ground looking dazed; after a few moments of lying still he leapt to his feet.

"Damn you! It took me three whole hours to build the Clam Cannon 8000 and you destroy it in a matter of seconds!" Roared Wallace in anger. "I'll just defeat you with my bare hands! Mwahahahaha!"

Wallace ran at Jimmy while flailing his arms in circles; Eleanor got to Wallace before he could reach Jimmy though.

"Leave Jimmy alone you meanie face!" Frowned Eleanor as she hit Wallace _very_ weakly.

Wallace stopped on the spot looking stunned and in pain.

"Oooo! Ow! That was quite a hard blow! I'm mortally wounded!" Wailed Wallace as he began to stagger on the spot. "I'm going down! Tell Jerry my pet turtle that he was the vilest and snappiest turtle I ever knew!"

Wallace dramatically collapsed to the ground and groaned in pain some more. He held up a rose over his chest to signify he was 'dead'.

"Is this what death is like? It's not so bad really … oh the pain!" Groaned Wallace. "Curse you Eleanor! You foiled my evil plan!"

Wallace continued the melodrama for a few more moments before lying still.

"So … did I win?" Asked Eleanor as she looked at Wallace with a confused expression.

"Go Eleanor! Show that bad guy who's boss!" Cheered Jimmy as he hugged Eleanor in victory before he realized what he was doing. "Oh, err, sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it." Smiled Eleanor.

"Is it safe to come out now?" Asked Carlton as he hesitantly came out from his rock cover.

* * *

**Confessional: Carlton missed one **_**heck**_** of a fight scene!**

**Eleanor: Yay! I won! I have to wonder though; it looked like Wallace let me win. That or he has an incredibly low body tolerance for pain.**

**Jimmy: I may not have won immunity … but did I deserve to really? Whether I did or I didn't I'm glad Eleanor won. I may only be ten but I **_**really**_** like that girl.**

**Wallace: Mwahahahahaha! Chris was a fool to bring me here! Covering Wawanakwa in clams wasn't my evil plan at all … though I was going to do that. The real evil plan was to cheat at the challenge so Eleanor would win. I've got five bucks on her winning the prize … and besides; after what Kasimar did she deserved immunity … wait … am I being **_**nice**_**? No! **(Wallace starts smacking his head against the side of the confessional). **GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!**

**Carlton: … Why was Wallace being so melodramatic? Maybe he should be in a drama club or something.**

* * *

The five campers were gathered in camp center; Wallace and Carlton were standing nearby as well. Tabitha had dried off by now and Spider and Lavender had recovered from their mine and boulder mishaps.

"Well everyone; this challenge was very dramatic … and melodramatic too." Smirked Chris. "Since Eleanor landed the finishing blow on Wallace it's clear that she gets immunity from tonight's bonfire ceremony. As for everyone else … you have a one in four chance of getting voted off. And getting voted off this late into the game would be hilarious for me to watch because you'd probably cry! Haha!"

"Oh go and crap yourself *cough* over the intercom." Snapped Spider.

"Shut uuuuup!" Whined Chris pathetically as he stomped his feet like a toddler who had just been given a ten minute time out. "Just hang out and do whatever it is that losers do until the bonfire ceremony in an hour."

And with that Chris left to his luxury trailer to get his tenth daily massage from a _very_ unlucky girl.

"Sucks to be you guys! Mwahahahaha!" Laughed Jimmy as he pointed in turn to the four who didn't have immunity.

"Oh shut up." Said Lavender with an eye roll.

"Yeah; at least none of us are dirty cheaters like you! We play fair and don't ruin the spirit of the game." Agreed Tabitha. "I don't know how anyone would like such a cheater like yourself; does anybody like cheaters really?"

"Well said Tabitha." Clapped Eleanor.

"You tell *cough* him." Nodded Spider.

Jimmy looked almost haunted by what Tabitha had said and wrung his hands nervously but nobody noticed this.

* * *

**Confessional: Vote for Barack Obama!**

**Spider: I'm good friends with everyone** *cough*** still here; but I'm going to vote for Tabitha. She's a** *cough*** big threat and she's rich already so she won't be too ***cough* **disappointed.**

**Eleanor: I vote for Tabitha; it's just that she's the person I'm least close to is all.**

**Tabitha: I vote for Jimmy; he's a much stronger contestant than he looks. He's also liked by everyone so this may be by only chance to get him out. Still; I feel kind of worried for tonight; I can't lose, I **_**can't**_**. **(Tabitha looks afraid for a brief moment).

* * *

A short while later the sun had set; the stars and moon were up in the sky and the five remaining campers sat around the bonfire area on logs and stumps. Wallace and Carlton were waiting on the boat of losers and would travel back to the Playa Des Losers with whoever was voted off. Chris soon arrived with a tray of a mere four marshmallows. He set the tray down on the oil drum like he always did and picked up the first marshmallows.

"Well losers; only five of you are here now … and soon we'll be down to an even smaller four. We all know Eleanor is safe … but who is going to be joining her in the final four?"

"I bet we all *cough* want to." Lamented Spider.

"Well regardless of if you want to be voted out or not it's time to start the ceremony." Said Chris as he held the marshmallow he was holding up into the air. "When I call your name come and get your marshmallow; that means that you are safe. The camper who does _not_ receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers. That means you're out … and you can't ever come back … _**ever**_!"

"You mean like how Andy, Daisy and Nakia came back?" Asked Lavender with a smirk.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris. "The first marshmallow goes to Eleanor as she is immune."

Eleanor got up from her seat next to Jimmy on one of the logs and took her marshmallow and ate it.

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"Lavender"

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"Spider"

Jimmy and Tabitha still didn't have a marshmallow. While Chris picked up the final marshmallow Tabitha looked quite nervous while Jimmy looked calm and collected.

"Jimmy … Tabitha. This is the final marshmallow of the night." Said Chris dramatically. "Both of you have come a long way in this contest and battled hard for the million dollar prize … but for one of you that prize is about to escape you. The final marshmallow of the night goes to…

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Tabitha."

Tabitha sighed in great relief as she got up relief and took her marshmallow. #

"No!" Yelled Eleanor in shock. "How could Jimmy be voted out?" Asked Eleanor in despair.

"Sorry Eleanor … not! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "But Jimmy got more votes than Tabitha did. So it's time for Jimmy to walk the dock of shame."

"Don't worry about it guys; only one of us can win right? It just seems like it wasn't supposed to be me." Said Jimmy in acceptance of his loss. "Take care everyone."

"We'll miss you *cough* Jimmy." Said Spider as he held his hand out for a shake. "Especially since I'm now *cough* the only guy left. Keheheh!"

Jimmy shook Spider hand followed by Lavender and Tabitha.

"See you around Jimmy; tell Barney I miss him." Smiled Lavender.

"Will do." Promised Jimmy.

"You're a really nice guy Jimmy; congratulations on getting as far as you did." Said Tabitha.

"Thanks Tabitha.

Jimmy turned to Eleanor who looked very upset and sad.

"I'll miss you most of all Eleanor." Said Jimmy as he shook hands with Eleanor. "You were always my best friend here."

Jimmy looked like he was going to say something else but he lost his nerve.

"See you later everyone." Said Jimmy in farewell as he walked to the dock of shame.

* * *

**Confessional: Once a Polly-Anna ... always a Polly-Anna.**

**Tabitha: That was a close one; I don't know how he got voted off … but as long as I'm still in the game it doesn't matter. Twenty two down, only three more to go.**

* * *

"I can't believe it." Whispered Eleanor softly as she watched Jimmy walk towards the dock of shame. "Why Jimmy? Why did he have to go?"

"I'm sorry that you lost your friend Eleanor." Said Lavender apologetically.

"Oh it's ok … but I'm _really_ going to miss that boy." Said Eleanor with a sad sniff.

Spider thought for a moment; judging by the look on Eleanor's face and the tone of her voice … it seemed to him that she had a crush on Jimmy. Spider instantly knew how he could offer some help.

"He's not gone yet Eleanor; if *cough* you run quickly you might be able to *cough* give him a proper goodbye." Said Spider soothingly.

"You're right Spider; see you later!" Said Eleanor as she quickly ran full speed towards the dock of shame.

Lavender and Spider watched Eleanor run after Jimmy and exchanged a glance.

"She likes him doesn't she?" Asked Lavender with a smile.

"I think *cough* she does." Nodded Spider happily.

"I wish the best for Eleanor; I'm going to follow Tabitha's lead and go to bed." Yawned Lavender.

"Me too." Agreed Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Can you feel the love about to happen tonight?**

**Lavender: So many of us have found love in this contest. Spider misses Quana and I miss Barney … It's only been a few days but it feels like an eternity.**

* * *

Jimmy calmly walked the dock of shame with his hands in his pockets and his head held high. Fifth place out of twenty six was pretty good … but it had to end sooner or later and Jimmy felt that he had done the right thing. He was about to board the boat of losers when he heard footsteps running after him.

"Jimmy! Wait a second!" Called Eleanor as she ran up to Jimmy.

"Hi Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy as he turned to his crush. "Good job on making it to the final four."

"Thanks … but it won't be even nearly as much fun without you." Said Eleanor sadly. "I don't know how you could have gotten voted off! You deserved to win!"

"Thanks Eleanor … but I'm not so sure about that." Mumbled Jimmy.

"What do you mean?" Asked Eleanor.

"Well … I cheated." Said Jimmy in shame. Yesterday you were supposed to have been voted off … but I switched the votes to keep you in and get Kasimar kicked off. I realize that because of that I'm just as much a cheater as Wallace … you and the others have got so far fairly … it wouldn't be right if I won because I cheated."

"Jimmy…" Said Eleanor softly. "You mean … you voted for yourself?"

"It was the right thing to do." Replied Jimmy. "But I'll be rooting for you!"

"I don't want you to go … you're my best friend." Sniffled Eleanor.

"Likewise." Nodded Jimmy. "But you still have a chance at the money; don't let that chance pass you by."

"You cheated and sacrificed your chance at the money … just for me?" Said Eleanor in a very touched voice. "That is the nicest thing anybody has ever done for me! I'm _really_ going to miss you."

"I … I'll miss you as well." Whispered Jimmy.

Jimmy and Eleanor stared into each others eyes for a few seconds; Jimmy looked away and seemed to be plucking up his courage.

"Eleanor … there's something I'd like to tell you; something even more important than candy." Said Jimmy nervously.

"What is it?" Asked Eleanor.

"Well … err … we've known each other for twenty five days and we've been best friends through all of it." Began Jimmy. "Err … I just … err."

"Take your time." Said Eleanor while smiling her sweet smile.

"I knew I should have rehearsed this before I said it." Sighed Jimmy before he looked into Eleanor's sapphire blue eyes. "Eleanor; what I'm trying, and failing, to tell you … err … is … is that I love you."

"…Jimmy." Said Eleanor while her heart began to do back flips.

"I know we're both young and not even teenagers yet … but I really like you." Blushed Jimmy. "I'd just like to ask you one thing and I'll more than understand if you say on … just don't laugh … will you be my girlfriend?"

Eleanor blinked a few times as tears of happiness appeared in her eyes.

"Jimmy … I know that you _like_ me; when you kissed me on the cheek last night I wasn't actually asleep." Said Eleanor shyly. "And you know … I think, despite how young we are, I love you too and I'd _really_ like to be your girlfriend."

Jimmy and Eleanor looked at each other for a moment before they leaned in and shared a sweet tender kiss; Eleanor popped her foot and after a few seconds they pulled away.

"I'll be rooting for you Eleanor." Said Jimmy to his girlfriend. "Win or lose I'll still cheer you on till the end."

Jimmy climbed aboard the boat of losers which started up and sped away into the night; Eleanor waved until the boat was out of sight. With a heavy heart and a big smile Eleanor headed back to camp with a spring in her step.

* * *

Jimmy looked out at the waves; he may not have won the million but he thought that Eleanor's friendship and love was worth _**far**_ more than any amount of money.

"You can thank me anytime you want." Said Wallace as he walked up beside Jimmy.

"Why? Aren't you evil?" Asked Jimmy suspiciously.

"I allowed Eleanor to beat me so that she would win immunity." Explained Wallace. "What Kasimar did sickened me … and I wanted to give Eleanor some compensation."

"I thought you were evil." Smiled Jimmy.

"Just because I'm a bad guy it doesn't mean I'm a _bad guy_." Smirked Wallace.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame and made grand gestures with his arms.

"And another one bites the dust. Jimmy is gone and Tabitha has scraped by. Only four campers are left now, only three challenges to go! Who will be the next person to walk the dock of shame? Will the next challenge be intense? Will Lavender ever die? And will I get any more godlike? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

Votes

Eleanor Tabitha

Jimmy: Jimmy

Lavender: Jimmy

Spider: Tabitha

Tabitha: Jimmy

Jimmy: 3

Tabitha: 2

* * *

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia, Kasimar, Jimmy

* * *

And Jimmy is gone. It's a shame really; but it's how it was meant to be. I think Jimmy was very likable and he was intended as one of the main protagonists. He may not have won the million … but he defeated Kasimar and won Eleanor's heart and that is worth something right?

Next Time: A murderer is loose on Wawanakwa Island! Can anybody survive?


	56. Day 26, Part 1, Not another killer!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network (lucky!). I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his incredible fanfic Total Drama Alphabet, the very fanfic that inspired me to write the one you are reading now. I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains some slight sexual humor, friendly butt squeezing, a horror movie that was apparently banned in over fifty countries before being released, some shout outs and a bit of kissing. You have been warned but it is nothing M rated nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**New poll: **Vote for your favorite couple in Total Drama Letterz! I'd like to know who's love you love the best!

**Note: **Sorry for the wait everyone; I've been very busy with real life due to being in sixth from and being a little ill recently. But I've been working on this chapter for hours now; so I hope you all enjoy it as I aim to please! Also, this chapter contains a reference to Survivor and a reference to Survivor Fan Characters … see if you can spot them!

Murderers are as crazy as Ripper Roo!

* * *

It was late afternoon on camp Wawanakwa; the sun was starting to set on the horizon and the sky was a delightful orangey pink color on this fine summer evening. Chris Maclean stood on the dock of shame and waved to the camera.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. The final five campers basked in the afterglow of Kasimar's elimination the day before. We learnt a few interesting things such as the fact Tabitha sleeps with a stuffed unicorn and Eleanor was starting to fall in love with Jimmy. Girls are so sappy and stupid right? Haha!"

"I gave the final five quite a difficult challenge. Wallace was up to no good and intended to cover all of Wawanakwa in smelly disgusting clams with the use of his latest evil invention; the Clam Cannon 8000! The final five had to confront Wallace on top of the thousand foot cliff and put a stop to his nefarious scheme!"

"While the five remaining idiots headed for the cliff Wallace tried to make our resident scare baby Carlton a tough guy. He tried teaching him bad manners, bad etiquette and how to face his fears. In the end it didn't seem to work so well as Carlton is still scared of pretty much everything in the known universe! Sucks to be him! Haha!"

"Wallace had decided to give the final five a sporting chance at defeating him and they found a pile of makeshift weapons waiting for them at the bottom of the cliff. After arming themselves up they stormed up the cliff to stop Wallace … but things are rarely as simple as they first appear! Haha!"

"Tabitha had overheard Jimmy in the confessional earlier that day; she learnt that he switched the votes to get rid of Kasimar. With this info in mind Tabitha subtly played on Jimmy's kind nature and way of doing the right thing. Soon she had Jimmy feeling very guilty about being a 'cheater' like Wallace and Kasimar. Oh; and Spider got blown up by a land mine but who the hell cares?"

"A little further up the hill Wallace unleashed his next 'evil plan'. He rolled a boulder down the hill in hopes of crushing one of his adversaries. The plan was a success as Lavender was flattened and through she survived it probably hurt … and I say brilliant because I hate that girl just like everyone I bet!"

"Tabitha, Eleanor and Jimmy made it to the top of the cliff to confront Wallace; while Carlton ran and hid Wallace wasn't one to flee from a fight. He used dynamite on the three 'good guys' and bought his Clam Cannon 8000 into the battle! A couple of seconds later Tabitha was sent over the edge of the cliff and down to the water below! Priceless! Haha!"

"Jimmy managed to destroy the Clam Cannon but Eleanor managed to take out Wallace and won immunity. We later learnt that Wallace had let Eleanor beat him so she would win immunity as compensation for what Kasimar had done to her. What a pussy!"

"At the bonfire ceremony it came down to Tabitha and Jimmy. Tabitha's manipulation from earlier had paid off as Jimmy voted for himself due to guilt and Tabitha narrowly scraped through. Jimmy said his goodbyes and walked the dock of shame."

"Before Jimmy left Eleanor caught up to give him a proper goodbye. Jimmy explained what he had done and why. In the end the two shared a kiss and hooked up. Laaaaaaame! Haha!"

"Only four campers are left in the game; we're in the final hurdles of the marathon! So what's going to happen on today's episode? Will Tabitha's cover ever get blown or will she weasel her way to the end? Will Eleanor be able to continue without Jimmy by her side? Will anybody sing in the shower? And will anybody die? Find out the answers to most of these question, and probably more, right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

Eleanor was sitting on her bed looking into the cage her ferrets lived in; she was currently stroking Frost and was deep in thought over the events of the previous night. Big things had happened during the competition, both good and bad, but the previous night topped it all.

Jimmy had been voted off. But he wasn't really unhappy with it; on the contrary he hadn't really minded. Jimmy explained to Eleanor before he left that he had switched the votes during the Silent Hill challenge to get rid of Kasimar and keep Eleanor in the game. But his guilty conscience took over and he had felt like a cheater. Before he left something big happened.

Eleanor and Jimmy kissed and became a couple.

Eleanor felt truly happy and vowed to continue in the competition no matter what;' Jimmy was going to be rooting for her and that was all the support she needed. Eleanor had wondered what her parents would think of her getting in a relationship but felt sure they'd be fine with it.

"I miss you Jimmy…" Mumbled Eleanor softly and quietly. "I'd really like to hear one of your jokes about now even if they can be groan inducing."

"Talking to yourself?" Asked Lavender as she walked into the cabin. "Do you miss Jimmy Eleanor?"

"As if you didn't already know." Replied Eleanor with a small smile. "He's my first boyfriend and he's gone just as we hook up. You understand don't you? Or am I being too angsty?"

"I completely understand." Assured Lavender kindly. "Too angsty would be Edward from Twilight. I felt sad when Barney was voted off. Still; you'll see him again in a few days. If the voted off campers are coming back in the finals you'll see him then if you make it that far."

"I didn't think of it that way; thanks Lavender." Smiled Eleanor as she sat up and got to her feet. "Speaking of relationships … have you and Barney shared an ice cream sundae while holding hands under the table? I've seen couples do that on TV occasionally."

Lavender blushed and tried to keep a straight face.

"We haven't done that … yet … but we have done _other_ things." Said Lavender as she turned to leave the cabin.

"Like what?" Asked Eleanor in great interest.

"Sunscreen." Said Lavender simply.

* * *

**Confessional: Sunscreen is the sun's TV! *rimshot***

**Eleanor: What did Lavender mean by sunscreen? …** (Eleanor gasps and giggles) **My oh my!**

**Lavender: I wonder if it was wise to give Eleanor that hint. **(Lavender thinks for a moment). **Nah; even if she figures it out she won't tell anybody anyway.**

* * *

Spider was sitting on the edge of the dock of shame looking out at the golden horizon. The great glorious sun was starting to set and as he looked out at it an eagle flew past it. The evening breeze blew lightly against Spider in an enjoyable way. For a while Spider had been reflecting on the competition thus far; it was now very nearly over and against all odds he had made it to the final four.

"Our story began only twenty *cough* six days ago ... but so much has happened since then *cough* that it almost feels like an eternity. To think that I thought I'd *cough* be voted off early." Mused Spider. "Now I'm in the final four and I'm *sneeze* the last of the guys left standing."

* * *

**Confessional: It's 3:1 in the girls favor!**

**Spider: I'm feeling pretty good about myself for** *cough*** making it this far. Just goes to show even an underdog can** *cough*** get far in a competition. My only problem is that my** *gag*** remaining competition are all strong and could** *cough*** easily team up to take me out.**

* * *

As Spider looked out at the horizon he heard footsteps walking down the dock; two seconds later Tabitha sat down next to him.

"Chris may be one of the worst people it has been my great displeasure to meet … but he did pick out a nice island." Said Tabitha while looking out at the horizon that was so close yet so far.

"Beautiful sunset isn't *cough* it?" Agreed Spider. "I'm guessing that the worst person *cough* you've met is Kasimar right?"

"Of course … him among a few others." Said Tabitha indifferently. "So … just three more days to go and it'll all be over. We've lost friends along the way … but I think with all the insane people gone it'll be smooth sailing till the finish."

"I have a bad feeling that the *cough* last three challenges will be the hardest of *sneeze* all." Mumbled Spider nervously.

"Maybe; but I'm sure we managed them if we've lasted as long as we have." Said Tabitha in thought. "So; what's it like being the last guy left in the competition?"

"I feel like *cough* lonely George." Replied Spider.

"… Isn't he … err … that tortoise who is the only one of his kind left?" Recalled Tabitha vaguely.

"That's the one." Nodded Spider. "I'm in a sort of similar *cough* position; I'm the only guy left and I'm on an *gag* exotic-ish island."

"Well think of it this way; you have three pretty girls on the island with you." Smirked Tabitha.

"Err … that's not a positive considering I'm already *cough* with Quana and very happy about it." Said Spider while looking at his shoes.

"Well that's nice." Smiled Tabitha falsely. "I want to ask you a small favor."

"Sure; what is *cough* it?" Asked Spider.

"Could you not vote for me at the next ceremony; I have a strong feeling I may be going if I don't win immunity." Said Tabitha with a pretend look of angst. "If you don't vote for me I'll make sure that you make it to the finals … you have my word."

"Well … Eleanor and Lavender are my *cough* friends … but if I win the money I'd share it *cough* with Quana … err … you have a deal … but just for *gag* today."

"Not a problem." Said Tabitha in understanding. "Thank you Spider."

* * *

**Confessional: Nyan cat! Meow!**

**Tabitha: It's kind of ironic in a way; I'm allying myself, temporarily of course, to Spider … the person who I gave an allergic reaction and gotten his girlfriend voted off. The amusing part is that he doesn't suspect a thing. This game is just too easy.**

**Spider: I have a sudden good feeling and ***cough* **I don't think it's due to allying with Tabitha. What could this mean?**

* * *

A little while later Chris called the final four campers to the dock of shame. He for some reason had a very sadistic look on his face but quickly changed his expression once he saw the campers looking suspicious.

"Well guys; you've made it to the final four." Said Chris with a small sign of being slightly impressed. "Only three challenges to go and we'll have our winner; personally I hardly expected you four to get this far … seriously! Spider's a sick germ sponge, Eleanor's a weak little girl, Lavender is the devil and Tabitha was on a really weak team … but bigger surprises have happened on reality television I suppose."

"Yeah; I'm very surprised that a moron like you managed to get on reality TV … I would have expected you to be a model for adult diapers." Snarked Lavender while the other three laughed.

"Shut up!" Screamed Chris while stomping his feet immaturely and screwing his fists into balls. "How dare you talk to the magnificent me like that!"

"After being a bigoted prat to us *cough* for so long I don't blame *cough* her." Remarked Spider.

Chris's response was drowned out by the horn of the boat of losers but if you could read lips you would be horrified at the vulgar content; even Eric Cartman would be horrified it was that bad.

The boat of losers pulled up to the dock and just floated there; a curtain was drawn around the front to stop the final four from seeing what was inside.

"Since you four idiots have made it so far I thought I'd be nice. I have a little surprise for most of you." Grinned Chris. "Come on out everyone!"

A moment later Quana leapt down from the boat followed by Jimmy; behind them Barney carefully got off due to still being on his crutches.

"Quana!" Grinned Spider in delight as his girlfriend hugged him tightly. "I've really *cough* missed you!"

"I've missed you too." Cooed Quana. "It's been fun at the Playa Des losers but it's a lot more fun hanging out with you."

While Spider and Quana conversed Jimmy walked over to Eleanor with a big smile and gave her a hug.

"I'm glad I can finally see you again." Smiled Jimmy.

"But it's only been a day." Giggled Eleanor.

"Really? It felt _so_ much longer to me." Chuckled Jimmy as Eleanor gave him a small peck on the cheek.

"Ahoy mermaid!" Waved Barney as Lavender ran up to him, tightly hugged him and gave him a big kiss. "Missed me?"

"… Duh me heartie!" Laughed Lavender.

Tabitha watched the happy reunions and turned to Chris.

"I don't suppose I have any special reward?" Asked Tabitha. "And are Jimmy, Barney and Quana returning to the competition?"

"Nope!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "You don't have a boyfriend, or girlfriend! Haha! Naturally because of that I can't give you anything! Sucks to be you! And also, no, Jimmy, Barney and Quana are only here for today. They'll be leaving tonight."

Tabitha growled but quickly shook off her anger.

"Whatever; so, what's the challenge today?" Inquired Tabitha dryly.

"It's not ready yet." Replied Chris. "Feel free to hang out and do whatever until I tell you otherwise."

Chris left while mumbling something about getting a super hot chick's number while the final four and three ex campers looked amongst each other.

"If anybody needs me I'll be putting laxatives in Chris's latte." Said Tabitha as she left the others. "Besides; I think you three couples would appreciate the alone time."

Tabitha left and Lavender quickly grabbed Barney's arm.

"I'll see you four later; this one is coming with me!" Said Lavender genkily like her boyfriend and began pulling Barney towards the girl's side of the Team Grenade cabin.

"So … care for a walk in the woods Eleanor?" Offered Jimmy shyly.

"You know it." Smiled Eleanor as she held Jimmy's hand and they headed off into the woods.

Spider and Quana exchanged a glance and smiled warmly.

"So; what do you *cough* want to do now?" Asked Spider nervously.

"How about a nice stroll along the beach?" Asked Quana. "Or maybe we could watch the sunset if you like."

"Let's watch the sunset; it sounds *cough* quite pleasant." Smiled Spider as he held Quana's hand.

"Are you just saying that because you know there is a very good chance I'll end up snuggling with you?" Giggled Quana.

"Err…" Stammered Spider.

"Don't worry; I'm just teasing you." Smirked Quana before gaining a sly smile. "…But still…"

* * *

**Confessional: Confess to your crime in here!**

**Lavender: I'm not one of those airheaded cheerleaders who loves making out twenty four seven … but I just **_**had**_** to do that. If you were me then you would understand.**

**Tabitha: I was lucky enough to just so happen to find some laxatives in a locked trunk under Chris's bed. What were the odds? **(Tabitha laughs)

**Spider: **(He is just smiling; he notices the camera and waves. After that he then continues smiling)

* * *

A while later Jimmy and Eleanor were walking through the woods holding hands. Taking a nature walk was very enjoyable in their opinion and Wawanakwa had wonderful wildlife despite being the domain of a hair gel loving latté slurping mad man. The two kids were talking about anything that came to mind as they walked along.

"So what's your favorite flavor of soda?" Asked Jimmy.

"Anything cherry flavored or lemon lime." Replied Eleanor. "So what do you prefer? Coke or Pepsi?"

"…Aren't they the same drink?" Joked Jimmy half seriously and half sillyly.

"True, true." Giggled Eleanor. "This is nice isn't it? A walk through the forest at sunset, birds chirping, just the two of us."

"How are your ferrets doing?" Asked Jimmy hesitantly. "I mean, well, you know … umm … I'm gonna stop talking now."

"Don't worry about it Jimmy." Said Eleanor as she looked wistfully up at the clouds. "I'm fine and I'm sure Frost and Dandelion will be fine as well … life goes on with or without you."

A leaf fell from a tree and the wind blew it along until it landed at Eleanor's feet.

"So Jimmy; what's the Playa Des Losers like?" Asked Eleanor interestedly.

"I haven't been there very long, and I can say with no uncertainty … its super awesome!" Grinned Jimmy as he and Eleanor sat down on a log. "It's relaxing, the Jacuzzi is great, the weather is somehow always cloudless even if rain had been predicted on the weather forecast … and they even have waffles! Though there is something else you might find interesting."

"Really? What's that?" Asked Eleanor as she absent mindedly played with one of her long blond curls.

"Well; I was walking around the Hotel … and I heard some screaming and wailing coming from behind a door that had the words 'Total Ousted Alphabet' on it. I peeked in and I saw Kasimar stuck in a chair getting electrocuted while being forced to listen to the SpongeBob Squarepants theme song on an endless loop; I have to say that I found it satisfying to see that complete monster get everything that he deserves."

"And it's all thanks to you." Smiled Eleanor as she laid her left hand on the log. "If you hadn't switched the votes then it wouldn't have been possible.

"Thanks; but I wouldn't feel right if I won after I cheated. But if you win then it'll be as happy as the ending of the first Harry Potter movie." Said Jimmy as he laid his hand down on Eleanor's. "I don't have a clue what today's challenge is … but I'll help you in any way I can if Chris allows it."

"Since when do we care what Chris says?" Asked Eleanor with a raised eyebrow.

"…Good point." Said Jimmy as he and Eleanor began to laugh.

* * *

**Confessional: As pointy as a pointy pencil!**

**Jimmy: I think Kasimar is still being tortured at this very moment; normally I'd help somebody in need but I think I'll make an exception this time. **(Jimmy smirks).

**Eleanor: That sounds really painful … but Kasimar has had plenty of chances to change his ways and ignored them all; therefore he is not entitled to any of my sympathy. And besides; the Nyan Cat would be much more effective, that's way more annoying than the SpongeBob theme song.**

* * *

Lavender and Barney were both in what was once the girl's side of the Team Grenade cabin. They were currently doing a dignified and sophisticated hobbie that most teenagers did with their significant other. In case you somehow haven't worked it out yet … they were making out.

"I can see why teens on TV love doing this so much." Giggled Lavender as she and Barney kissed.

"It helps that you're a good kisser and you're kips are as soft as a marshmallow yaaar!" Flirted Barney.

"A weird analogy yet it's still somehow flattering." Chuckled Lavender as she ruffled Barney's hair.

While Lavender smooched Barney he suddenly had a slightly naughty idea; in one swift motion he squeezed Lavender's butt.

"EEP!" yelped Lavender as she realized what Barney had done.

"You like?" Grinned Barney while raising his blond eyebrows up and down.

"You naughty boy!" Snapped Lavender but Barney could tell she wasn't angry due to the mischievous look on her face. "Give me a warning next time you're gonna do that!"

"Where's the fun in that mermaid?" Asked Barney as Lavender got up off him which allowed him to sit up as well; he straightened out his blond dreadlocks continued speaking. "Besides; you're the one wearing my hat me heartie!"

Lavender was indeed wearing Barney's hat; as she blushed in embarrassment she handed it back to him.

"I never would have thought a pirate could possibly be romantic." Murmured Lavender.

"I'm like whipton iced tea; don't doubt me till you try me." Joked Barney. "So with kissing and friendly butt squeezing aside; I overheard Chris say that the challenge was going to be a hard one savvy. I'd recommend being on your guard as you never know what that slimy Skazzatrazz will do next. I'm proud that you've got so far in the contest me red haired sea lass; just three more opponents to beat … though the problem for me is if you and Spider are the final two; I'd love to support and help you since you're my girlfriend yaaar … but Spider is one of my best friends too yaaar."

"Let me put your worries into this perspective … if you don't support me I'm suspending your butt squeezing privileges for three weeks!" Threatened Lavender playfully.

"One of the things I most like about you is your assertiveness yaaar." Smiled Barney.

* * *

**Confessional: Asserting your opinion is vital when it comes to politics!**

**Barney: I attract the ladies even more than Jack Sparrow yaaar! **(Barney raises his eyebrows up and down).

**Lavender: Barney told me a joke today? Wanna hear it … I'm assuming you've said yes. Ok; what's the difference between Chris Maclean and a coconut? One is thick and hairy … the other is a coconut!**

**Chris:** (He is screaming in anger).** Shut up you wretched failed abortion! I'm ten times the man you'll ever be … especially as you're not even a man! Haha! Good one Chris my man.** (Chris smiles smugly).

* * *

Spider and Quana were sitting next to each other on the beach watching the sunset; Quana had read in books and magazines before that sunsets were romantic and now she knew it to be true.

"Isn't this lovely my little arachnid?" Asked Quana as she lay her head on Spider's shoulder. "I've really been looking forward to some 'us' time. I think if there was a song to describe our relationship it would be Can You Feel The Love Tonight."

"I quite agree my *cough* Hispanic Beauty." Smiled Spider. "I don't think anything could ruin this *cough* moment."

"Exactly." Smiled Quana before she casually added. "So … wanna see my boobs?"

"_**What**_?" Stammered Spider in shock, nervousness, panic and embarrassment. Quana began laughing and giggled mirthfully.

"I'm just fooling around; you should have seen the look on your face!" Laughed Quana as she wrapped an arm around Spider.

"You _really_ know how *cough* to tease me." Murmured Spider with an amused sigh.

"And don't you forget it." Grinned Quana. "But don't worry; a healthy in badonkadonk's is natural for a teenage guy."

Spider hid his blushing embarrassed face and groaned.

"Oh come here you!" Smiled Quana as she lovingly hugged Spider. "I'm just teasing you; lots of couples do that. You can tease me if you want to."

"Ok, err … you're butt is as firm as the support *cough* beam's in a mint condition house." Smirked Spider.

Now it was Quana's turn to blush in embarrassment; while she nervously giggled Spider continued.

"And your panties are as orange *cough* as an orange." Teased Spider.

"Ok, ok, we're even. You're embarrassing me!" Groaned Quana shyly but still sounding amused.

"So … since Chris will probably make this challenge *cough* really hard due to it being one of the *cough* last three … how about a kiss for good *cough* luck?" Asked Spider nervously.

"… Pucker up Spider!" Grinned Quana flirtatiously.

Quana leaned in and she and Spider began to smooch; a few seconds of kissing later the intercom crackled into life and Chris began to speak.

"Attention campers and ex campers; please report to the amphitheatre for the first part of today's ... well … tonight's challenge! This one is sure not going to be fun for you losers! Haha!" Laughed Chris. "That is all."

A second later a loud fart echoed across camp from the intercom.

"Aw #bleep#! Not again!" Screamed Chris in rage.

* * *

**Confessional: Immature fart jokes are so silly! Now mature fart jokes on the other hand are awesome!**

**Spider: Those who don't learn from their ***cough* **mistakes, such as Chris, are doomed to ***cough*** repeat them. And boy; being in love with ***cough* **Quana is a really nice feeling.**

**Quana: **(She is shaking her head in amusement). **Chris is such a butt monkey … that means that he's the butt of every joke, kinda like Charlie Brown or Rodney Trotter.**

**Chris: Shut up!**

* * *

Not much later the final four campers and the three ex campers were seated in the amphitheatre; the couples were sitting together and Tabitha sat alone with crossed legs at the front of the bleachers. Chris stood on the stage where a movie screen had been set up like the one from the horror challenge back in season one. A DVD player was hooked up to it and Chris seemed to be holding something behind his back.

"Well everybody; have you had some a nice evening with your lovers?" Asked Chris before continuing without waiting for an answer. "That is what I would ask if I gave two #bleep# and a #bleep# about you. Anyway; you've most certainly noticed the movie screen set up. The first part of tonight's challenge is to watch a movie; can anybody guess what movie it is?"

"Scruff in a Midsummer Night's Dream?" Guessed Jimmy.

"Shallow Hal?" Guessed Lavender.

"Pirates of the Caribbean?" Guessed Barney.

"Some crappy movie that you starred in?" Snarked Tabitha.

"All of your guesses are completely wrong! Haha! … And my movies don't suck!" Snapped Chris. "Anyway; tonight you will all be watching…

…

…

…

…

…

"Get on with it!" Barked Lavender.

"Fine; tonight you are going to be watching Guts and Murder; a horror movie considered the scariest movie of all time! Seriously; it was banned in fifty eight countries before it was even released."

"That movie is rated eighteen." Pointed out Tabitha with a disapproving frown. "I'm the oldest here and I'm only seventeen; making us watch that is illegal."

"So what? It's my show and I can and I will make you losers watch it!" Smirked Chris sadistically. "And by the way; if any of you leave before the movie is over then you'll be walking the dock of shame … and I'm seriously _not_ bluffing."

Chris inserted the DVD into the DVD player and pressed the play button.

"I'll see you idiots later; I'm going to drink a latté and watch people suffer on fear factor." Laughed Chris as he left the area.

"Jimmy…" Murmured Eleanor nervously.

"Yes Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy.

"I'm easily scared by horror movies; do you mind it if I sit on your lap for the movie?" Asked Eleanor shyly. "I'll feel more at ease that way."

"No problem." Assured Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: …Boo!**

**Spider: **(He looks pale as a sheet). **Oh … my … God! That movie was ***cough* **absolutely horrible! Oh man; I'm not going to be sleeping easy tonight.**

**Eleanor: **(She is shaking in fear). **I want my mummy. **

**Barney: **(He is in a fetal position sucking his thumb).

**Tabitha: **(She is gripping her purple hair steaks and looks quite scared). **I bet Uzuri would have liked that movie. Whoever made that movie needs psychological help … badly!**

**Quana: **(She is staring into space). **That shouldn't have been rating eighteen … it should have been rated one hundred and twenty!**

* * *

About an hour and a half later it was getting dark and the movie was near the end. Tabitha was shaking, Jimmy and Eleanor were huddled up and had their eyes closed tightly, Quana was hiding her head in Spider's chest while he stroked her hair and looked freaked out; Barney and Lavender looked a little creeped out but were taking it a little better than the others.

In the movie the killer finished off the last character with an angle grinder; blood splattered on the screen and the credits started to roll.

"It is … over?" Whimpered Eleanor while still hiding her face.

"Don't worry … that mess of a movie has finished." Assured Tabitha. "…So that's what an internet troll would look like in movie form."

"I don't know; it was ok me hearties." Shrugged Barney. "I kinda liked the part where RaspberryBeard stole the Taco and ate it in a tree."

"…What are you talking about Barney?" Asked Lavender in confusion. "That didn't happen at all."

"Oh, you see; when a movie starts to seriously suck seaweed I make up my own movie in my head yaaar." Explained Barney nonchalantly.

"Are there people like that in the real world?" Asked Jimmy shakily; he had pulled his beanie over his eyes.

"Sadly there are." Frowned Quana sadly. "Kasimar was just one of the many sadistic sociopaths in our world."

"Like Chris." Chimed in Spider.

"Exactly." Said Quana bitterly.

A silence rose through the air for a whole two minutes.

"Where is Chris anyway?" Asked Tabitha. "Shouldn't he be announcing the next part of the challenge?"

"Maybe he's waiting for us back at camp yaaar. Let's go and find him." Suggested Barney.

"Good idea; I'd like to kick him in the nuts for making us watch that horrid movie." Growled Eleanor while still looking frightened; Jimmy squeezed her hand to comfort her.

"Let's get going *cough* then." Said Spider as they headed back to camp.

* * *

**Confessional: Camp Crapanakwa!**

**Lavender: I wonder if I could sue Chris for making us watch that movie that was out of our age range.**

* * *

The seven campers headed back to camp; as they looked around Quana suddenly screamed. Spider was to her aid immediately.

"Are you ok *cough* Quana?" Asked Spider in concern.

"C … c … c … Chris is dead!" Said Quana in terror as she pointed head.

Everyone looked where Quana was pointing and saw something shocking; Chris's dead body was lying sprawled out on the ground in a pool of what looked like blood. He had been gutted and a few bullet holes were visible on his chest.

"Oh … oh my god." Said Jimmy as he looked terrified and sickened.

"Don't worry Jimmy." Assured Tabitha while looking unimpressed at the body. "This is just part of the challenge."

"How do *cough* you know?" Asked Spider.

"Think about it; Chris just made us watch a horrible scary slasher film and now he's suddenly 'died' which implies a killer is around. This sounds like a challenge … and also, he did this exact same challenge last season." Explained Tabitha logically.

"Maybe you're right." Murmured Lavender as she huddled against Barney. "But … just to be sure … Barney, could you check if the body is real or fake?"

"No problem mermaid." Nodded Barney as he began to look over the body and investigate it. "Wait; he's holding something."

Barney took a folded up newspaper out of Chris's hand and passed it to the others.

"What does it say?" Asked Quana. "Can you read it to us?"

"Sure; here goes." Said Lavender as she began to read.

* * *

_Mass Murderer Escapes Asylum_

_Earlier last night a Texan mass murderer known as Hussle Rantz escaped a maximum security asylum for the criminally insane during a power cut. He is armed and highly dangerous. It is believed he is carry weapons stolen from the asylums confiscated weapons room ranging from knives, pistols and sleeping gas bombs to a mere flyswatter. _

_Hussle Rantz was imprisoned twenty five years ago when he slaughtered a group of fifty fishermen at a fishing convention on a small Island in Muskoka known as Wawanakwa Island which is currently used for the reality show 'Total Drama Letterz'. His motives were unclear but psychological experts say he lacks sanity and has what is known as a criminally clouded mind. He spent six summers at Camp Wawanakwa as a young boy and is believed to be returning there as he feels it is his 'home'. Do not risk apprehended Rantz; if you sight him or even if you hear anything at all about his location contact authorities immediately._

* * *

Lavender finished reading the newspaper and looked shaky. The others were all wide eyed except Tabitha who looked passive and Barney who was still examining the body.

"Don't worry guys." Assured Tabitha. "How would he get to Muskoka from Texas in one night? And even then, he'd have to steal a boat to get here; boat security would be tight and I am doubting he would be able to swim here."

"Yeah; Tabitha's right, Chris is just trying to scare us." Said Eleanor as she began to calm down.

"Eek!" Yelped Barney as he leapt away from the body with a panicked expression on his face.

"What is it Barney?" Asked Lavender to her boyfriend.

"Guys … we're in _deep shit_ … that body … is _real_." Said Barney while sounding genuinely afraid.

Now everyone was truly scared; even Tabitha looked completely horrified.

"Quick; into the mess *cough* Barricade the doors!" Ordered Spider as he held Quana close to him. "If we can stop Hussle Rantz getting to us until morning we'll be ok; its likely help will arrive before long since the show is live."

"Good thinking Spider." Nodded Tabitha as the four campers and three ex campers quickly ran into the mess hall. Once inside they began moving around the tables, chairs and other furniture to barricade themselves in.

* * *

**Kitchen Confessional: Yay! We've got a new residence!**

**Tabitha: Until further notice myself and the others are not going to risk using the normal confessional; we'll be using the camera in the kitchen pantry for now. I feel scared; is this how it will end? I've been miserable plenty of times before … but this … this tops all of those times.**

**Spider: I don't know why … but the name 'Hussle Rantz sounds** *cough*** familiar. But that's not important. **(Spider hangs his head and looks distraught). **This is like a ***cough* **real life slasher movie. I don't want to die! There** *cough*** are so many things I haven't gotten to do** *cough*** yet…**

* * *

Chris watched the campers panicking from a tent in the woods; he was looking at the camera screens and laughed sadistically to himself.

"This is great! It's even better than R rated adult movies on cable! Haha!" Laughed Chris horribly. "It was good thinking of mine to send Chef to the Playa Des losers for some 'time off'. He's such a gullible idiot! And boy; there interns did great plastic surgery on that body I stole from the morgue.

"This isn't very nice Chris." Said a person standing in the tent wearing an asylum outfit and armed with some mostly fake weapons. "This is really, really, _really_ mean!"

"Oh shut up!" Snapped Chris. "Be thankful I actually swallowed my pride to let you help with the challenge. Now you know what you have do right?"

"Capture the final four and bring them here right?" Said the mystery person.

"Yep … and make sure to scare them and harm them as much as you can without killing them." Cackled Chris. "Your targets are the final four … but giving the three ex campers a scare is something I'd encourage."

"I'm not going to hurt them." Frowned the person. "And what if they recognize my voice? I'm pretty sure they will; especially you know who."

"Use this." Said Chris in a board tone as he tossed a mask to the mystery person. "As long as you wear that your voice will be altered so nobody will recognize you."

The person put the mask on; the mask itself was almost like a skull but was more like a blood red version of the mask of the killer in Scream.

"**So; when do I start the scaring**?" Asked the person.

"I'd say now is as good a time as any." Smirked Chris.

"**Ok; here I go**!" Grinned the unknown person as he or she walked to the open entrance flap of the tent. "**And by the way; you're as ugly as a licker from Resident evil**!"

With that being said the mystery person happily ran from the tent and towards camp. Chris blinked and then snarled in anger.

"I hate that retard!" Snarled Chris as he took out a latté. "Ah Mr. Latté, you are my one and only friend!"

Chris chugged the latté in three gulps and let out a content belch.

"That was nice … though it tasted a little funny." Said Chris with a 'hmmm'.

Suddenly Chris felt a bit of pain in his stomach area.

"…Arrrgh! Bathroom!" Wailed Chris as he ran to a port-o-potty that had been set up nearby; it looked like he had drank the latté that Tabitha had put laxatives in earlier.

* * *

Oh no! This looks liker a challenge that will really scare the campers. But who will be brave and confront the killer? Who will make it to the final three? And who is the killer anyway? I'll give you a hint … it's one of the voted off campers!

If you enjoyed this chapter or the story in general then why not leave a review. It only takes a moment and it is the readers continued feedback that makes me continue writing.


	57. Day 26, Part 2, Murder on Wawanakwa ST

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network (lucky). I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his awesomely awesome story Total Drama Alphabet.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains some revelation, scary moments, a kick to the groin, a fight and a nasty sadistic host. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Poll Result: **SpiderxQuana was the most popular pairing with three votes, GaryxRaven was second with two votes and all the rest had one vote each. It's good to know that each pairing has at least one fan.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **For once I don't really have that much to say. Could be that I'm half asleep as I type this. Enjoy the chapter everybody!

I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids!

* * *

The five teens and two preteens were in the mess hall; while Barney, Jimmy and Spider hugged their girlfriends Tabitha paced between the tables as though she was trying to think of a plan.

"Ok; help should be coming soon … but what if it doesn't arrive in time? That's a worst case scenario that we have to be ready for." Said Tabitha as she paced. "Consequently I think it is an appropriate course of action for us to not leave the mess hall under any circumstances. According to the newspaper article Hussle Rantz is deranged, dangerous and armed … not a good combination. No matter what happens we mustn't let our guard down."

"Tabitha's right; we're all in this together yaaar." Nodded Barney. "Not all of us were team mates previously yaaar … but we're gonna get through this savvy!"

* * *

**Kitchen Confessional: High School Musical.**

**Tabitha: We should be safe in the mess hall … unless the killer is strong enough to breakdown the door. I have to admit, I'm scared. Also; I may have wanted to win the competition by any means … but I never wanted anyone to die…**

**Barney: I could do with some ice cream yaaar.**

* * *

Quana was snuggled up against Spider as he gently stroked her silky hair; Quana looked afraid and so did Spider.

"I'm really scared Spider." Whimpered Quana. "What if we … die? There is so much I'd like to do with my life."

"Don't worry Quana; we'll be *cough* ok." Assured Spider. "After all; we're in here and Hussle Rantz is out there; we're *cough* safe for now."

"But for how long?" Asked Quana. "You know Spider … I've always been a little afraid of death. I know I'm only sixteen … but it still makes me think at times."

"Likewise." Whispered Spider. "But we're going *cough* to be ok. Help will arrive soon *cough* enough."

There was the sound of something smashing in the kitchen. Everyone froze in panic.

"… Oh _no_." Shivered Eleanor as she pulled her hat over her eyes. "Was that … Hussle Rantz?"

"I'll go and check." Said Barney bravely.

"Not a chance." Said Lavender immediately. ."I am not letting you put yourself at risk; I'll come with you."

"But I don't want you to get hurt yaaar." Said Barney emotionally.

"Don't worry; I have a strong kick … and besides." Said Lavender as she revealed a knife. "I took this from the kitchen; this should provide adequate defense."

"The rest of you stay here yaaar." Said Barney. "Arm yourselves as well savvy."

Barney and Lavender entered the kitchen while the other five campers looked amongst each other.

"There goes the bravest couple I've ever known." Said Jimmy in pure admiration.

"Are they going to be ok?" Asked Eleanor nervously.

"I'm sure they'll be ok." Said Tabitha; truth be told she knew there was a chance of the opposite but she didn't want to scare Eleanor more than she already was.

Suddenly there was a loud smash sound from the kitchen and the sound of two thuds. A few moments of silence passed.

"Quick! We've got to *cough* help them!" Said Spider as he leapt up and ran to the kitchen with the other four following him.

"…Where are they?" Asked Quana in worry as she looked around the kitchen.

The kitchen was empty; there was no sign of Barney or Lavender; no bodies, no blood, no nothing. …What had happened?

* * *

**Kitchen Confessional: I'll tell what didn't happen; anything good!**

**Tabitha: **(She is shivering in fear). **…Oh no…**

**Eleanor: **(She is crying).

**Quana: I might die tonight … so I'm going to confess my sins. Where to start. Well; there was the time I started that food fight when I was a freshman in high school … and then there's the fact I always cut in line in the cafeteria in elementary school whenever they had pizza or doughnuts … **(Quana sighs in shame) **and the way I got my full body tan … is that I sunned myself naked.**

* * *

"**It's lucky I had some knock out gas grenades**." Said the mysterious 'killer' as he or she or it dragged an unconscious Barney and Lavender into the boat house and shut the door and locked it. "**I** **hope they won't be too mad at me; it's all for a challenge**.** I'd say Lavender stands a good chance at immunity**;** she actually tried to use a knife!**"

The 'killer' turned to head back to camp while Barney and Lavender were still knocked out; however, they were completely unharmed.

* * *

**Confessional: Who could the killer really be?**

**Chris: This challenge is so much fun to watch! Seeing people in terror is always so fulfilling! Haha!**

* * *

"This is bad; this is very bad." Said Tabitha as she paced in the kitchen while Spider, Quana, Jimmy and Eleanor stood around. "Barney and Lavender are Missing in Action and now there is a hole in the kitchen wall!"

Sure enough there was a large carved hole in the wall; it was clear that the mess hall wasn't safe anymore.

"So what do we do now?" Asked Jimmy with a gulp.

"I suggest … we find a *cough* safe location … and plan the next *cough* move." Said Spider.

"Good idea … but is there anywhere on the island that is still safe?" Asked Tabitha as she glanced at the hole as though expecting 'Hussle Rantz' to come bursting in at any second.

"We could use the canoes to get off the island." Suggested Eleanor.

"Good thinking Eleanor." Nodded Quana. "So; me Spider and Tabitha shall go and get the canoes while you and Jimmy stay here, it'll be safer."

"But … what if Hussle Rantz comes here while you're gone?" Asked Eleanor nervously.

"Arm yourselves with anything you can find; knives, bottles, maybe a chair leg. We'll only be a few minutes." Assured Quana softly.

"Actually; I need to get something from my cabin." Said Tabitha with a look of seriousness. "Something that may help us."

"Is it that mini computer Lavender told me you have?" Asked Eleanor.

"No; we can't get any damn signal on the island." Muttered Tabitha. "No; I'm just going to tilt the odds in our favor a little."

Tabitha quickly left through the hole in the mess hall wall towards her cabin while Spider and Quana exited as well but headed down towards the beach where the canoes were kept.

Once the teens were gone Eleanor slowly sat down on a chair and covered her face in her hands and began sobbing.

"Are you ok Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy as he sat next to his girlfriend and gave her a comforting hug.

"Not really; we're stuck on an island with an armed maniac, I'm scared senseless … and Lavender and Barney are…" Eleanor Trailed off and blinked a few times in fear. "Aren't you scared Jimmy?"

"Truth be told … yes, I am; in fact, I've never been more scared in my life." Nodded Jimmy. "Even the time the guys and I got lost in the woods on Halloween doesn't top this. But if you think happy thoughts then you'll feel a little better."

"You know what Jimmy … you're right; I'll try and think positive." Smiled Eleanor weakly. "And maybe Lavender and Barney are ok; we didn't hear any screaming or anything. They might still be alive."

Jimmy nodded and took off his hat in respect to his missing friends and put his hands together to pray. Eleanor followed his lead and did the same.

* * *

**Confessional: Back to the normal confessional!**

**Tabitha: First off; if anyone at the Playa is listening … thank you Wallace! I feel very thankful that you didn't take your weapons with you from yesterday's challenge. Tabitha Teresa Amethyst Barrington never goes down without a fight!**

**Spider: Ok; all we've got to do is get ***cough* **a canoe or two ready and we can head for the mainland. Even ***sneeze* **if Hussle Rantz follows us we'll be long gone. **

**Quana: **(She is confessing more sins). **Then there was the time I threw a water balloon at a parked car on a dare … and also I can't forget that I have the swear filled song London Underground on my IPod.**

* * *

Tabitha ran into her cabin and shut the door as well as locked it. She got on all found and started reaching under her bunk bed for something; after a few moments of rooting around her hand grasped the handle of what she was looking for; from under her bed Tabitha pulled out the Cell Phone tazer from the previous days challenge.

"I'd like to see Hussle Rantz be able to stand after many concurrent zaps from over 500 volts!" Grinned Tabitha. "Wallace said the weapons won't kill anyone … but he never said they wouldn't neutralize the target."

Tabitha flicked the switch of the weapon and turned it on; a buzz of electricity flickered at the end of the nodes of the cell phone.

"This'll make Rantz feel pretty shocked." Said Tabitha with determination.

* * *

**Confessional: Bad pun alert!**

**Tabitha: That was a pretty bad joke in retrospect; but that's not important. Now that I'm armed I'll be able to defend myself properly; I just hope Rantz isn't wearing electricity proof cloths…**

**Chris: This just keeps getting better and better!**

* * *

Spider and Quana had reached the beach and were each dragging canoe towards the water.

"Ok; before we get the others and set sail we should make sure that there aren't any holes or cracks in the canoes." Said Quana. "This'll only take a moment."

Spider began to inspect the canoe he had dragged while Quana bent over and looked over her canoe to make sure it was safe to use.

Spider quickly determined that his canoe was in proper condition and turned to Quana to see if she was done checking; he immediately looked away so Quana wouldn't think he was staring at her toned ass.

"Yep; this one's fine." Said Quana as she got to her feet.

"Excellent, good booty … I mean *cough* good job! Err …" Said Spider in panic.

"Checking out my tooshy?" Grinned Quana flirtatiously. "Now's not exactly the time for that … yet I don't really mind."

"Yeah … we'd better get back to the *cough* others." Mumbled Spider in embarrassment but his mood quickly changed. "Aaargh!"

A short figure wearing a blood red scream mask and armed with several weapons was watching them; the figure began slowly walking towards them. Spider's love for Quana quickly overtook his common sense and he stepped in front of her.

"Get away from my *cough* girlfriend you psycho!" Snarled Spider as he charged towards Hussle Rantz.

"Spider! Don't!" Wailed Quana.

Spider punched the 'killer' in the gut which knocked him or her or it backwards but didn't seem to hurt the killer at all.

"**Teehee**!** That felt good**." Said the 'killer' as it took out what looked like some sort of gun. It was a tranquilizer gun but Spider and Quana didn't realize this due to their terror.

"Get away from my little arachnid!" Roared Quana as she kicked the killer over with a roundhouse kick.

"**Eep**!" Yelped the killer as he or she or it fell over and fired off two tranquilizer darts which both hit their mark.

Quana collapsed to the ground followed by Spider; just before they lost consciousness they both said one thing to each other.

"I love you."

Spider and Quana lay still as 'Hussle Rantz' grabbed both of them by one of their legs and began to drag them away; he or she or it didn't get very far before a voice spoke to them.

"You sick _fuck_." Said Tabitha in a deadly whisper.

Tabitha was about to zap the killer in the head but the killer was one step ahead of Tabitha and grabbed an oar that was lying beside him or her or it and whacked Tabitha on the head.

"… So many unicorns." Slurred Tabitha in a daze as she collapsed to the ground unconscious.

"… **I'll be back for you later**." Said the killer as he or she or it continued dragging Spider and Quana away to the boat house.

* * *

**Kitchen Confessional: Such a cliché phrase.**

**Jimmy: Spider, Quana and Tabitha have been gone for quite a while … I'm getting very worried…**

**Eleanor: I hope the others are alright … they've been gone for over an hour.**

* * *

"If I had known this would happen I would have never signed up for this insane show … though I don't think anyone else would have either." Lamented Eleanor as she and Jimmy sat on chairs at what was once the Team Puzzle table while holding hands. "Do you think help will be arriving soon?"

"I hope so." Said Jimmy. "I don't want to see a single hair on your pretty head harmed in even the slightest bit. I feel more scared than … I'm so scared I can't come up with a funny reference to lighten the mood."

"It'll be ok." Said Eleanor as she gave Jimmy's hand a comforting squeeze.

"Thanks." Smiled Jimmy.

Suddenly a black colored grenade was thrown into the mess hall from the kitchen and gas began filling up the room.

"Oooo … I feel sleepy." Slurred Jimmy as he collapsed to the ground.

"Jimmy … ooo." Groaned Eleanor as she too fell to the ground and lay still and knocked out.

The killer entered the dining area from the kitchen and began to gently drag the two preteens out of the building and towards the boat house where the others that had been knocked out were being held.

* * *

**Confessional: Boat house? More like house boat because you can live in those!**

**Chris: The final confrontation is coming up … this is going to be **_**good**_**! Haha!**

* * *

Tabitha stirred and let out a small groan. She opened her eyes and got to her feet and looked around. It was still dark and there was no sign or either Spider or Quana; the killer was long gone it seemed … but was definitely still on the island. Tabitha picked up her cell phone tazer and cautiously headed back to camp to see if anyone else was still alive while keeping an eye out in case Hussle Rantz appeared.

"This is bad … this is very bad." Whispered Tabitha in fear as she quickly ran towards the mess hall and entered to see if Jimmy and Eleanor were still there.

Tabitha entered the mess hall through the hole in the kitchen all and froze as she peered into the dining area … Jimmy and Eleanor were nowhere to be found. Hussle Rantz had gotten them.

"No …. No." Whimpered Tabitha in panic as she walked back outside. "I wanted to be the last person in the game but not like this! What am I gonna do?"

"**You could start by looking over here**." Said a voice.

Tabitha looked in the direction of the voice and felt what was left of the color in her face completely drain out. Hussle Rantz was standing very nearby pointing what looked like a handgun at her.

"**Goodnight sweet prince … or should it be princess**? **Oh who cares**?" Said the figure as it pulled the trigger of the gun.

CLICK

Nothing happened which the killer noticed.

"**Looks like I'm out of ammo**." Noted Hussle Rantz. "**I suppose I'll have to do this the old fashioned way then**."

Hussle Rantz made a fighting stance and started to calmly approach Tabitha.

"Get away from me!" Screamed Tabitha as she pulled the trigger on the cell phone tazer and zapped Hussle Rantz.

"**Teehee**! **That tickled**!" Laughed the mysterious figure as it tried to punch Tabitha.

Tabitha leapt away and tried firing again; as before Hussle Rantz laughed off the attack.

"**Looks like the Barrington family will be left without a heir after tonight**." Chuckled Hussle Rantz as the killer took out another weapon … a fly swatter.

"…A fly swatter? Seriously?" Blinked Tabitha in confusion. "That's not going to kill me."

"**It's not supposed to**." Replied Hussle Rantz as he or she or it lunged at Tabitha.

Tabitha tried to make a run for it but was unable to get out of the fly swatters range as Hussle Rantz swished it full force.

SWACK!

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOWIIIIIE!" Screamed Tabitha as she leapt about six feet in the air with one hand clutching her pained rear. "You freak!"

"**Teeheeheeheehee**!" Laughed Hussle Rantz in amusement.

"You think that's funny? Let's see how much you laugh after experiencing high voltage!" Roared Tabitha as she turned the voltage of the cell phone tazer to maximum and firing.

ZAP!

"**OW**!" Yelped Hussle Rantz.

ZAP!

"**EEK**!"

"ZAP!"

"**ARGH!**

Hussle Rantz stumbled over to the ground and Tabitha rested a foot on his or her or its chest and had an expression of rage and fear at the same time.

"Now; maybe before I fry your brains out I'll take a look at who you really are. Maybe you wear that mask so people won't see how ugly you are!" Scowled Tabitha as she reached for the mask and took it off.

There was five seconds of pure silence as Tabitha instantly recognized who 'Hussle Rantz' really was.

"… … … Uzuri?" Said Tabitha in complete confusion.

* * *

**Confessional: Whoa … didn't see that coming!**

**Tabitha: … I am so confused.**

* * *

"And that ends the challenge!" Grinned Chris as he walked up with the other six 'murdered' campers behind him; Quana and Barney were holding Lavender back from attacking Chris.

"Wait … this was just a challenge?" Blinked Tabitha as she moved her foot off Uzuri. "And there never really was a killer … and you did all this for a cheap laugh?"

"And this surprises you exactly why?" Smirked Chris sadistically.

Tabitha looked extremely angry and aimed the cell phone tazer at Chris.

"No! Don't!" Wailed Chris cowardly.

ZAP!

* * *

**Confessional: Karma!**

**Tabitha: I. Hate. That. Man.**

**Lavender: Go Tabitha!**

**Uzuri: I think I did a pretty good job as the killer; I was never going to hurt them … though scaring Tabitha out of her wits was an added bonus. Teehee!**

* * *

Chris straightened out his hair as he coughed out some smoke.

"Well anyway; now you all know you were never in any danger and that Uzuri was the fictional killer Hussle Rantz. " Said Chris. "Though if I could have gotten away with killing you I would have done it! Haha!"

"Sorry if I scared you guys. I was just doing what I was instructed." Apologized Uzuri. "I **never** would have actually hurt you."

"Don't worry about it yaaar." Assured Barney. "You really had us going!"

"But how did you resist the pain?" Asked Lavender.

"Err, I'm mostly immune to pain, remember?" Reminded Uzuri. "I think the story has already established that."

"What story?" Asked Jimmy ion confusion.

"I don't know." Shrugged Uzuri with a cheerful giggle.

"So … who wins *cough* immunity?" Asked Spider. "Was winning criteria, who *cough* lasted the longest."

"Nope, the winner is whoever managed to fight against the killer the best … and that means Tabitha wins immunity hands down." Announced Chris. "The rest of you are fair game at tonight's Bonfire Ceremony. And the ceremony is going to take place in … twenty minutes as it's practically midnight as it is. You should go and cast your votes."

"But wait; the body from earlier was *cough* real." Pointed out Spider. "How do you explain that?"

"Oh, that, well … I just purchased a dead body off Ebay and made the interns give it plastic surgery." Shrugged Chris. "Ciao losers."

Chris left to fix his hair while the campers looked amongst each other.

"Good luck Spider." Said Quana as she kissed her boyfriend.

"You too Lavender." Said Barney.

"I'm rooting for you Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy.

* * *

**Confessional: Who will take fourth place?**

**Chris: I have a feeling that this particular Bonfire Ceremony will be very dramatic! Haha! **(Chris smirks nastily).

* * *

The final four campers were sitting on stumps around the Bonfire Ceremony pit. While Tabitha was feeling relaxed as she was immune, Spider, Eleanor and Lavender didn't feel as confident as any of them could have been voted out. Lavender could be voted out for being a threat. Eleanor could have been voted out for being the youngest. And maybe the girls had teamed up to take out Spider, the last remaining guy. It would soon be revealed who was voted off because Chris arrived with a tray of only three marshmallows.

"Hi losers; I have to say … I sure enjoyed watching you squirm and squeal in terror! Haha!" laughed Chris nastily. "Anyway; one of you is about to be voted off so close to the end; I'm sure going to enjoy your tears of sadness! And seeing your disappointed loved one on the boar of losers will be the icing on the cake! Haha!"

"Shut up Chris! Go to hell!" Snarled Lavender.

"This challenge was crossing the *cough* line." Growled Spider.

"That movie was horrible and I felt so scared!" Frowned Eleanor.

"Not cool." Said Tabitha disapprovingly.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris as he took a few deep breaths and picked up a marshmallow. "If I call your name, come and get a marshmallow. That means that you are safe. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers … that means you are out of the contest … and you can't come back … ever."

"Get on with it." Said Eleanor in annoyance at Chris's attempt to stretch out the drama.

"Fine; whatever! Since Tabitha is immune she gets the first marshmallow." Said Chris as he tossed a marshmallow to Tabitha and then plucked up another as he looked at the three who were not immune.

"The second marshmallow of the night goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Spider."

Spider sighed in great relief as Chris tossed him his marshmallow.

Lavender and Eleanor exchanged glances and gulped nervously.

"This is the final marshmallow of the evening; whoever does not get this is out of the contest, must board the boat of losers and can never ever come back ever!" Said Chris dramatically. "The recipient of the final marshmallow is…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Not going to be announced just yet."

"Why? Was there a tie?" Asked Lavender.

"Nope; there was a clear majority." Said Chris as Chef Hatched wheeled a wireless Television next to him with a DVD player. "To heighten the drama tonight … your votes are going to be shown on screen! Hope you didn't say anything you're going to regret! Haha!"

While Spider, Lavender and Eleanor looked at the screen Tabitha looked absolutely panic stricken.

* * *

**Confessional: Who voted for whom.**

**Lavender: I'm going to vote for Eleanor; it's just that Spider is Barney's best friend and I also just feel he deserves to be here longer … though I'd rather not vote for either.**

**Eleanor: I vote for Lavender. Spider is my last remaining team mate and after everything he's been through I'd like him to stay. Not only that but Quana is my best friend, besides Jimmy, and I consider this as doing her a favor.**

**Spider: I really cannot decide who to vote for … I guess its coin flipping time. I apologize in advance for who receives my vote. **(Spider takes out a quarter). **Heads I vote for Lavender, tails I vote for Eleanor. **(Spider flips the coin and looks at it). **Heads. No hard feeling Lavender.**

**Tabitha: Things couldn't have ended up better. I won immunity and those saps are on the chopping block and I'm pretty certain I know who is going. I vote for Lavender as she's the biggest threat. You know; this game has been almost too easy; from using Uzuri as a pawn, paying Kasimar to break Gary's legs, blackmailing Andy, allying with Kasimar and Nakia, giving Spider an allergy attack and getting Quana voted off I'd say this show has been kind of fun. So yeah; goodbye Lavender.**

* * *

There was complete shocked silence in the Bonfire Pit; Lavender, Eleanor and Spider turned to Tabitha who looked horrified and anger and hatred burned in their eyes.

"Yes!" Cheered Chris. "Lavender's out! Dock of shame time Lavender. Get the #bleep# off my island! Haha!"

"Shut up Chris!" Snapped Lavender as she ran up and kicked Chris in the balls full force.

"AAAAAAAAARGH!" Screamed Chris in a very high pitched voice though nobody was listening.

"You! You little demonic weasel!" Screamed Lavender at Tabitha in pure rage. "How could you? Allying with the devil and doing so many horrible things? You #bleep#!"

Lavender was about to attack Tabitha but Chef held her back.

"You've dug you own grave Tabitha." Said Lavender eerily calmly. "It's almost time for you to lie in it. You can let go now Chef, I won't maul her."

Chef released Lavender who turned to Spider and Eleanor.

"Good luck you two; make sure this demonic witch gets her karma." Said Lavender in farewell. "See ya!"

Lavenders turned and walked the dock of shame calmly and boarded the boat of losers; Chef Hatchet got on and soon the boat sped off into the night.

"I can't believe you! I thought you were a nice charitable person … but you're just a selfish little meanie who doesn't give a damn about anyone but herself!" Growled Eleanor while breathing painfully fast. "I bet it was you who put Kasimar up to … killing Bitsy!"

"I didn't do that, I just told him to…" Tabitha trailed off.

"Told him to hurt me I bet." Said Eleanor in a teary voice. "I bet you manipulated jimmy into voting for himself didn't you."

Eleanor looked like she wanted to say more but she looked about ready to break apart in anger; instead she turned and ran off back to camp.

Tabitha felt shaky as she turned to Spider, who looked at her sadly.

"Why?" Asked spider calmly.

"…" Tabitha was silent.

"What did I ever do *cough* to you?" Asked Spider. "What did any of us ever *cough* do to you?"

"It was nothing personal." Said Tabitha but Spider held up a hand to silence her.

"Using somebody so nice as a pawn and setting off my apple *cough* allergy seems personal to me!" Said spider in a calm tone, though his voice sounding like it was cracking. "You got several of my friends voted *cough* off, got others injured, cheated to get the love of my life *cough* voted off … and for what? Money? Something you already have *cough* plenty of. You are a selfish greedy girl. I once *sneeze* thought Kasimar and Nakia were the worst people I'd ever met … but you know what? You are _even worse_."

Spider turned and started to head back to camp while trying to keep calm and not let his misery and anger overtake him.

Tabitha stood still, frozen in shock by what had happened. A moment later a single tear fell out of her eye.

* * *

**Confessional: Your cover is blown!**

**Tabitha:** (She looks sad and shaky).** … It was just strategy; they don't understand my position at all. I had no **_**choice**_**.**

* * *

Chef Hatchet stood on the dock of shame.

"So yeah; rich girl's cover is blown and cheerleader has been eliminated. Only three of the contestants are left now; Tabitha, Eleanor and Spider. Who are you going to root for? Who will be the next voted off? And will pretty boy ever have children due to these frequent kicks to the gonads? Find out next time on Total Drama Letterz.

* * *

Votes

Eleanor: Lavender

Lavender: Eleanor

Spider: Lavender

Tabitha: Lavender

Lavender: 3

Eleanor: 1

* * *

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia again, Kasimar, Jimmy, Lavender.

* * *

And Lavender has been voted off. I really liked Lavender; she was like the exact opposite of cheerleaders that you usually see on TV; she was smart and nice instead of dumb and mean. Plus she wore a thong. :D We'll see her again in a few chapters so don't worry too much Lavender fans.

Tabitha's cover has been blown and she is now on an island with two people who hate her. Will she be able to survive? I'm not telling! Either way it's going to be a dramatic final two episodes.

Next Time: I triple _donkey_ dog dare you!


	58. Day 27, Part 1, I dare ya!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. All three of them belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his fanfic Total Drama Alphabet (Go Todd, Zack and Mallory!). I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter includes pancakes, a sucker punch, a wedgie, rotten fruit, a head in the toilet, a monkey imitation, a frying pan and other insane dares. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Hi guys! I have some important news; next week from Monday to Friday I will be going to a camp for people with Tourettes Syndrome like myself. Thus there won't be any updates on those days and it is likely I won't be near a computer so if I do not respond to a review or a comment that is why. Also, I can happily announce … Total Drama Letterz now has OVER fifteen thousand hits! Thank you for everyone who has read the story up until now for adding to the kits counter!

I triple donkey dog dachshund dag lizard ditto dare you!

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame; the sun was shining in the sky and Chris was dressed in a game show outfit, like what an overly made up Hollywood star would wear.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. I decided to show the final four a little mercy and bought back their, gag, loved ones for the day. They spent some time together but none of you care about that right? …Though so! Haha!"

"I forced the campers to sit through an eighteen rated movie; Guts and Murder. They may not have been old enough but who the hell cares? Haha! By the end of the movie they were all pretty scared and that was perfect for the actual challenge."

"Upon arriving back at camp they found me 'dead'; it was actually a body I bought on Ebay that had undergone some plastic surgery treatment. Either way; they saw that the body was real and after reading a fake newspaper article about a killer called 'Hussle Rantz' they barricaded themselves in the mess hall."

"I had recruited one of the voted off campers to pose as the killer; one by one this killer eliminated the campers from the challenge until only Tabitha was left standing. Tabitha wasn't going down without a fight and armed herself with the cell phone tazer Wallace created for day twenty five. She faced off against the killer and managed to subdue him or her or it and then unmasked the killer. The killer turned out to be none other than Uzuri who I hate very much."

"Tabitha won immunity due to managing to defeat the killer while the other three were vulnerable to being voted off. At the bonfire ceremony it was Lavender who was voted off, good riddance. Adios Team Grenade. Oh, and something else happened! Haha!"

"I revealed the votes to the campers; Tabitha has mentioned all the things she has done throughout the game in her confessional. As a result Tabitha's cover was blown! She's gonna be in for it now! Haha!"

"As we start the penultimate episode we have only three campers left in the game. Eleanor, Spider and Tabitha. Who will be the next person to lose? What dangerous and insane challenge do I have planned for today? Will anything unexpected happen? And am I the most awesome person ever? Find out right now on Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

* * *

The final three campers were sitting in the mess hall eating pancakes; like the first season it was 'all you can eat' and the campers were taking full advantage of this and were eating the tasty pancakes that were a merciful break from the usual food. Tabitha was sitting on one of the tables and Eleanor and Spider at another. To put it lightly … they weren't too happy that Tabitha had done so many bad things over the course of the season. Both were talking in hushed voices so that Tabitha couldn't hear them.

"So it's agreed; whatever the next challenge is we'll team up and get rid of Tabitha." Said Eleanor as she took a big bite out of a pancake.

"Exactly; I don't think Tabitha *cough* deserves to win the money. It's just you and me from *cough* here on out." Confirmed Spider as he and Eleanor shook hands.

* * *

**Confessional: S and E VS T.**

**Spider: I was stunned last night when I** *cough*** learned what Tabitha has done … I really didn't see it** *cough*** coming. She's a very good liar. Due to her getting Quana unfairly voted** *cough*** off and trying to eliminate me by giving me an** *cough*** allergy attack … I don't think I can forgive** *sneeze*** her…**

**Eleanor: I think it's pretty clear Tabitha is getting voted off next; she's gonna need a miracle to get to the finals. She did all that _really_ mean stuff for a million? I can understand that … in a way … but she's already rich! I guess the saying is true; the love of money is the root of all evil.**

**Tabitha: If I don't win immunity then it's game over for me.**

**Chef: I found some pancake ingredients a week from their expiration date in Chris's private stash. Seriously; they deserve something for getting this far and putting up with pretty boy for so long. **(Chef grumbles to himself)

* * *

After the final three had finished eating their delicious pancake breakfast Chris walked into the mess hall in his game show outfit.

"Attention losers; ready for your penultimate challenge?" Asked Chris with a sadistic grin.

"I'm ready!" Said Eleanor in determination.

"Like it matters if we are ready or not; you're going to force us into something awful regardless." Said Tabitha with an eye roll.

"Right you are Tabitha." Smirked Chris. "Today's challenge will be an … 'enhanced' version of one of the challenges from last season. Needless to say it, but I'll go ahead and say it anyway … it'll hurt you a **lot** more than it's gonna hurt me! Haha!"

"So what's the *cough* challenge?" Asked Spider.

"I can't tell you yet … but it's going to take place at the top of the thousand foot cliff." Said Chris so as to give a subtle but vague hint.

"Are we jumping of the cliff?" Asked Tabitha with a groan. "Painful and unoriginal."

"You'd think it would be that; but it's not." Smirked Chris. "Follow me to the top of the cliff and we can start the challenge and eliminate one of you by the end of the day."

Chris swaggered out the door of the mess hall with an air of sadistic smugness like that of a big headed snake while the three remaining campers followed after him while bracing themselves for the worst … and it was likely the challenge was going to be as bad as they thought.

* * *

**Confessional: I dare you to continue reading. (Hint, Hint)**

**Tabitha: My cover may be blown … but it's only a minor setback … seriously, my only remaining competition is a twelve year old and a sick guy. The money is as good as mine. All I've got to do is win the challenge.**

**Spider: I have a feeling this challenge is ***cough* **going to be quite painful.**

**Chris: I sure hope so! **(He cackles nastily).

* * *

The top of the thousand foot cliff looked noticeably different; a stage had been set up with a large podium, three smaller podiums with the faces of the final three on them along with some flashing lights and a spinner on a wooden circle. The Confessional was also in the vicinity as well.

Chris strolled out from behind the curtains of the stage and waved to the none existent audience; he posed, blew kisses and did a little dance before taking his place behind the largest podium.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, trans and herms! Welcome to the semi final's of Total Drama Letterz! Our final three have battled hard in their journey to get this far but before they can get to the final they have to face their toughest challenge yet. Two campers will progress and one will fall short. Of course; you don't care about that! You want to see the awesome, sexy, handsome, amazing, super, beloved and handsome me!"

"You said handsome twice." Called Chef from backstage.

"That's because it's true." Whined Chris. "Anyway; here are our three contestants! First up; she's a coldhearted schemer with absolutely no morals and probably enjoys seeing people get tortured, it's Tabitha!"

Tabitha walked out from backstage with a scowl on her face.

"I don't enjoy seeing people getting tortured! That's sick." Frowned Tabitha as she sat on the chair behind her podium. "And I would like to add that unlike Kasimar I do have a moral compass."

"I don't care so therefore what you say doesn't count." Smirked Chris immaturely. "Our next contestant represents the guys but is so unmanly he's as girly as Barbie! Plus he's sick as somebody who's eaten too much candy, it's Spider!"

"I'm not that *cough* unmanly." Frowned Spider as he walked out from backstage and sat by his podium. "Furthermore you're insults are *cough* seriously lame."

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris as he forced a smile as he returned his attention to the camera. "And our final contestant; she's a weedy wimpy pint sized pushover who has an affinity for rats; it's Eleanor!"

Eleanor walked out from backstage and stomped on Chris's foot.

"Ferrets are not rats!" Growled Eleanor as she sat behind her podium while Chris hopped on the spot in pain.

"You little brat!" Scowled Chris in anger before remembering he was on camera. "Anyway; congratulations on making it to the final three. You've battled long and hard to get here … but before the final challenge tomorrow we have one last elimination challenge for you. You all remember the triple dog dare challenge last season right?"

"Hw could we not? It was disgusting! Owen ate dog food!" Gagged Tabitha.

"Well today we're brining back that challenge in the upgraded and enhanced form of … I triple _donkey_ dog dare you!" Cackled Chris in pure sadism. "If you would look over to the center of the stage you will see the wheel of torture."

Sure enough, in the center of the stage was a wheel with an arrow spinner on it; around the edge of the wheel were pictures of all twenty three campers who had been voted off, eliminated or just plain not made it to the final three. From early boots like Patch and Fifi to recent elimination such as Jimmy and Lavender, they were all there.

"The twenty three eliminated campers were asked by me to supply us with dares to torture you idiots with." Smirked Chris. "And they sure had a lot! Haha!"

"Do we get freebies?" Asked Eleanor. "And are we allowed to share them?"

"Nope! This time there are no freebies whatsoever, you cannot skip a dare in any way. You cannot pass it on either." Chuckled Chris.

"You mean…" Gulped Spider as he trailed off.

"That's right; you have to do the dare yourself. It'll be dare after dare after dare until somebody is unable to complete their dare. You also have to accept a dare within a minute of it being revealed or you're out as well." Grinned Chris sadistically. "So spin the wheel without great care; let's get this started if you dare! Haha!"

* * *

**Confessional: I dare you to eat mud!**

**Spider: This is** *cough*** gonna hurt…**

**Eleanor: I think it's safe to say that whoever gets a dare from Kasimar is gonna be eliminated … or at the least they'll be injured … ouch.**

**Tabitha: This might not be so bad; I'm the most physically able and there are no freebies that Spider and Eleanor can use to gang up on me … I like the odds.**

* * *

"Now let's get this party started." Smirked Chris. "Since this is an alphabetical season we'll be doing the dares in alphabetical order … so Eleanor, you're up first."

"… Aw biscuits!" Groaned Eleanor as she walked up to the spinner and span it clockwise.

* * *

**Confessional: What could the first dare be?**

**Eleanor: I was a little worried about what the dare would be … but I had no reason to worry because fate smiled upon me.**

* * *

The spinner landed on Patch.

"Our first dare is … eat broccoli. Lame." Grumbled Chris as he handed a small piece of raw broccoli to Eleanor. "Eat this and you pass the dare."

"Nice! I love broccoli." Smiled Eleanor as she quickly ate the broccoli. "Not bad."

"Hopefully Spider will get a worse dare." Muttered Chris as Spider got up once Eleanor sat down and span the spinner.

The spinner landed on Uzuri.

"Oh dear; this could *cough* hurt." Eeped Spider.

"Uzuri's dare … get electrocuted by a tazer." Grinned Chris with sadistic delight. "…Awesome!"

"I guess I'll take *cough* the dare." Mumbled Spider.

"Perfect." Smirked Chris as he took out a tazer and zapped Spider.

"YEOWCH!" Wailed Spider as he was zapped for two constant seconds.

* * *

**Confessional: Zappity zap zap!**

**Spider: … Ow.**

**Tabitha: It's a good thing I got rid of Uzuri when I did; if she'd got this far she would have no problem withstanding the dares. due to her immunity to pain**

* * *

Tabitha span the spinner hard; when it came to a stop it landed on Raven.

"Raven dares you to … get wedgied!" Cackled Chris. "This is gonna be hilarious!"

"I'll say." Agreed Eleanor.

"What?" Shrieked Tabitha before she groaned. "…Fine; let's get this over with…"

"Spider; care to do the honors?" Asked Chris with a smirk.

"Err … I would rather not, being *cough* that I'd be touching her undies and *cough* all." Mumbled Spider.

"If you don't do it this is going to be a short episode as I'll eliminate you." Said Chris promptly.

Spider groaned to himself as he rose from his seat and stood behind Tabitha.

"Touch me in any way you shouldn't and I'll destroy you." Threatened Tabitha.

"Don't worry, I won't … but *cough* you kinda deserve this." Replied Spider.

"Oh get be- OOOOOW!" Screamed Tabitha in pain as Spider wedgied her thus revealing her dark purple panties.

Five seconds of wedgying later Spider stopped and looked like he had been touching poison while Tabitha hissed in pain.

"And Tabitha- snrrrk- completes the –snrrrk- dare." Laughed Chris in amusement.

"Shut up Chris!" Snapped Tabitha as she gingerly sat back down in her seat.

* * *

**Confessional: Welcome to wedgie city!**

**Spider: If any of you think I enjoyed** *cough*** touching her underwear you are mistaken; it was … both awkward and** *cough*** embarrassing.**

**Tabitha: **(She is hiding her face with her hands). **I have never been so humiliated…**

* * *

"Eleanor; your turn." Said Chris.

Eleanor spun the spinner once again and after a bit of spinning it landed on Barney.

"… Imitate a monkey … I expected better." Shrugged Chris.

Eleanor began making monkey sounds and jumping around while scratching her armpits like a stereotypical monkey.

"How immature." Muttered Tabitha.

"True … you'd *cough* make a better monkey." Smirked Spider.

While Tabitha scowled Spider laughed.

"And Eleanor completes her dare." Said Chris.

"Yeehaw!" Cheered Eleanor as she stopped acting like a monkey and sat back down.

* * *

**Confessional: That looks as fun as a barrel full of monkeys!**

**Eleanor: The imitation would have been better if I'd had a banana; but there aren't any banana trees on Wawanakwa.**

* * *

Spider had span the torture wheel and it landed on Jimmy.

"Jimmy's dare is … to drink a glass of pure lemon juice … and let me tell you, lemon juice is very sour! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

"Bring it *cough* on!" Said Spider bravely.

Chef walked out from backstage in a pink dress while holding a glass of lemon juice in one hand; he handed it to Spider and left backstage again.

"Why does Chef wear *cough* drag?" Asked Spider.

"Heck if I know." Shrugged Chris. "Just drink the lemon juice."

Spider quickly drank the juice in one gulp and gagged while looking like he wanted to be sick.

"Ick!" Gagged Spider.

"What were you expecting? Cola?" Chuckled Tabitha.

* * *

**Confessional: I was expecting lemonade…**

**Tabitha: It's only a matter of time before somebody cannot go on … and by somebody I mean either Spider or Eleanor, obviously not me.**

**Eleanor: Poor Spider; that lemon juice must have been unbearably sour.**

**Spider: … This would be easier ***cough* **with freebies.**

* * *

"Maybe the fact you are next will wipe the smug smile off your face." Smirked Chris.

Tabitha grumbled as she span the spinner again; this time it landed on Xaria.

"This is a good dare; drink a blended mixture of expired meat, moldy milk and strong minty toothpaste." Smiled Chris sadistically.

While Tabitha blanched in disgust Chef bought out a glass containing the disgusting beverage. It was the most horrible sickly colored imaginable and smelt like a freshly picked scab on an athlete's leg.

"What'll it be Tabitha? Drink the disgusting beverage … or lose?" Asked Chris with a look of amusement.

"If I have to drink this crap to win … so be it." Shrugged Tabitha as she drank the horrid drink in a few quick gulps; when Tabitha stopped drinking she looked light headed and very ill.

"Oooo." Groaned Tabitha; a moment later she ran to the edge of the cliff and puked.

* * *

**Confessional: I don't even want to _think_ about what that crappy drink tasted like.**

**Tabitha: Oh my **_**God**_**!** **That was **_**vile**_**! I actually feel even sicker than Spider normally does!**

**Fresh Water Man Eating Shark: **(Subtitles are provide as translation; for some reason the shark speaks in a Jamaican accent … your guess is as good as ours). **Yuck! A human vomited on me from up in the sky! Gross Mon!**

**Chef: How did a shark even get in the confessional?**

* * *

Eleanor had span the spinner and this time it had landed on Andy.

"Andy's dare … stuff one of Patch's socks in your mouth for ten seconds … nice dare." Laughed Chris in pure sadism as Chef carried out a sock at arms length away from himself and handed it to Eleanor.

"Ew! Thos sock is a smelly as a dung beetle." Gagged Eleanor.

"You could always chicken out." Smirked Chris.

"I'm going in!" Said Eleanor as she stuffed the smelly sock in her mouth. Instantly her eyes began to water from the _**dreadful**_ smell and taste.

"You're enjoying this aren't you? Asked Spider disapprovingly to Tabitha.

"Actually … even I think this is a bit much." Said Tabitha in repulsion from what Eleanor had to do. "Though it is somewhat of a guilty pleasure."

"Time's up Eleanor; you pass." Said Chris with a sickened look.

* * *

**Confessional: Lock the sock! Hey, that rhymed!**

**Eleanor: **(She looks disgusted and is brushing her teeth rapidly).

**Chris: **(He is laughing his ass off). **Disgusting but hilarious! Haha!**

* * *

Spider walked up to the torture wheel and gulped.

"If I get Kasimar or Nakia's dares I'm *cough* done for." Gulped Spider as he span the wheel.

The spinner landed on Mable.

"Eat a heavily bruised rotten sour grapefruit. Lame, just like Mable." Yawned Chris dully as he handed Spider a very damaged and rotten green grapefruit.

"This is the second fruit *cough* related dare I've received. I'll take the dare" Noted Spider as he hesitantly began to eat the grapefruit.

"Maybe it's because you're a fruit!" Laughed Chris immaturely. "By that I mean a queer! Haha!"

A large bag of sand fell out of the sky and conked Chris on the head and made him fall to the floor in pain while Spider finished the rotten grapefruit.

"Where did the bag of sand come from?" Asked Tabitha in confusion.

* * *

**Confessional: Insert author cameo here!**

**Tabitha: Normally I'd ask how that was possible …, but after being in this crazy show for so long I hardly care anymore.**

**CragmiteBlaster: I couldn't let Chris get away with that remark so I intervened just this once. And yes, I put myself in my own story … you got a problem with that? Huh? HUH?**

* * *

Tabitha had span the spinner; this time her dare was from Zita.

"Oooo, you're not gonna like this one." Smirked Chris. "Come check this out Tabitha; you're gonna have to see it to believe it! Haha!"

Tabitha approached Chris to see what the dare was.

BAM.

Chris punched Tabitha off her feet and to the ground.

"Ow! What the #bleep#? That hurt!" Growled Tabitha while rubbing the sore spot Chris had punched.

"Haha! That was the dare, getting punched by me! You're so weak and womanly, not being able to take a little punch! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

SHA-KICK!

Tabitha kicked Chris in the balls before returning to her seat.

"Waaaah! Boohoohoo!" Sobbed Chris as he clutched his 'little soldiers' in immense pain.

* * *

**Confessional: Groin attack!**

**Eleanor: He had it coming.**

**Tabitha: This is turning out to be a pretty bad day; drinking a disgusting beverage … getting wedgied … and getting punched by Chris. Yeah; not very fun.**

* * *

A couple of minutes later Chris recovered from getting kicked to the balls. As he shakily got to his feet and dusted himself off he cleared his throat and continued as though nothing had happened.

"Next up is Eleanor." Said Chris casually.

Eleanor span the wheel and after a few seconds of anti clockwise rotation it landed on Oscar.

"What do I have to do this time Chris?" Asked Eleanor.

"…Kill yourself." Smirked Chris.

A few seconds of horrified silence ensued which were broken by Chris laughing sadistically.

"Fooled you! Haha!" Laughed Chris nastily.

A rock fell out of the sky and conked Chris on the head.

* * *

**Confessional: Rock and roll!**

**CragmiteBlaster: Do I even need to say why?**

**Chris: **(He is crying like a baby).

* * *

Chris staggered to his feet and groaned in pain.

"Your dare is to dunk your head in a toilet." Laughed Chris.

"Gross." Gagged Spider.

"The toilets back at camp?" Asked Eleanor. "They're pretty far away from here."

"Good thing we bought a toilet with us." Smirked Chris as Chef lugged a toilet from backstage and set it on the ground. "What'll it be? Stick your head in the toilet … or walk the dock of shame?"

"I'll take the dare." Shrugged Eleanor as she dunked her head into the toilet; a few seconds later she came back up completely dry and unaffected.

"What ... how … how.!" Stammered Chris in shock.

"There wasn't any toilet water in it." Shrugged Eleanor.

"You probably should have held the challenge at camp; then it would have worked." Smirked Chef.

"AAAAAARGH!" Screamed Chris in immense anger.

* * *

**Confessional: That was definitely toilet humor! *rimshot***

**Spider: Chris has more meltdowns** *cough*** than Springfield Nuclear Power Plant.**

**Chris: Dammit! Why does that stupid blood belching **#bleep#** get such easy dares? I wanna see her cry! Aaaaargh!**

* * *

Spider span the wheel and it landed on Nakia; he cringed while dreading what she might have chosen as a dare.

"Nakia's dare … is rather disappointing." Frowned Chris. "Wear an ugly wig for one whole minute."

"That's it? I *cough* can handle that." Said Spider confidently as Chris handed him a wig like the ones Sadie and Lindsay had to wear back in season one.

"Now we just have to wait for one minute." Said Chris.

A minute passed.

"Well … that was pretty boring; you pass." Shrugged Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: As boring as the color beige.**

**Chris: Man; some of these dares are just plain stupid! I should have had the foresight to make Kasimar come up with all of them. Grrrr!**

* * *

Tabitha span the spinner on the wheel of torture and it landed on Gary.

"Whack yourself in the face with a frying pan … this ought to be funny! Haha!" Cackled Chris as Chef bought out a frying pan and handed it to Tabitha. "Frying pan or dock of shame … the choice is yours."

Tabitha looked from the frying pan to Chris and then back to the frying pan and sighed.

"The things I do for the sake of winning." Mumbled Tabitha as she closed her eyes and prepared to whack herself.

CLANG!

Tabitha whacked herself and staggered on the spot while stars circled her head.

"Why is it always *cough* stars?" Asked Spider to Eleanor.

"I know right; they're putting the birds out of work." Joked Eleanor.

Tabitha shook her head to clear her noggin of the dizziness and daziness.

"Curse you Gary." Muttered Tabitha as she sat back down.

* * *

**Confessional: Curse you Perry the platypus!**

**Spider: Sometimes this show feels like a ***cough* **cartoon.**

**Tabitha: **(She is holding a bag of ice to her head). **So this is how Squidward feels huh?**

**Eleanor: Nice dare Gary! … But wait; what if I get one even more painful? **(Eleanor gulps).

* * *

"And that's the end of part one." Said Chris to the camera. "Join us after the break for the next part of the challenge. Who will do something humiliating? Will anyone get seriously injured? Will anybody cry like a baby? And who will be the last person to lose before the finals in the penultimate challenge of Total Drama Letterz? Find out after the break!"

"Somebody will cry like a *cough* baby." Smirked Spider. "And that person is you Chris."

"Shut up!" Snapped Chris angrily.

* * *

And that's part one of day twenty seven. It's another dare challenge but with a lot higher stakes this time, you know, because the prize is ten times higher than season one. The next chapter will have even more funny dares and a lot of hilarious and funny moments. We're nearly at the end of the story guys! Only five chapters remain from this point on.


	59. Day 27, Part 2, Donkey Dog Dare!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme. That belongs to Frank15 and his story Total Drama Alphabet (why won't Stephanie just lose already?). I do however own all twenty eight OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains melted marshmallows, a mousetrap, cat food, Twilight, a hand buzzer, a tumble and a lot of other stuff. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Poll: **Vote for who you want to win Total Drama letterz! However; the poll spoils who is voted off in this chapter so I would recommend reading this chapter before voting.

**Note: **I don't have much to say … except one thing. TOTAL DRAMA LETTERZ HAS TOPPED 600 000 WORDS! Woohoo!

Who will be the final two?

* * *

"And we're back." Said Chris while making grand and highly overly dramatic arm gestures. "Sorry for the wait!"

"We didn't go anywhere." Stated Eleanor.

"And hardly any time passed; you *cough* just stood silently for about three and a *cough* half seconds." Agreed Spider.

"Oh shut up!" Snapped Chris very, very, _very_ whineyly.

* * *

**Confessional: Wow, _real_ mature Chris, _bravo_.**

**Chris:** (He is crying).** Why won't these three losers just be nice to me?**

**Tabitha: I find it hard to believe that Chris even has the ability to comb his hair; seriously, he's as immature as an adult with a serious sugar rush.**

* * *

"Anyway; let's get back to the challenge." Said Chris with a sadistic grin. "Eleanor, you're up."

Eleanor hot up from her seat and made her way over to the torture wheel; she span it hard and after a few seconds the spinner landed on Wallace.

"Eat cat food … this dare seems strangely familiar." Pondered Chris as Chef bought out a plate with cat food on it.

"That's because there was a dare like this last season." Reminded Tabitha. "Except it was to eat dog food rather than cat food."

"Who cares?" Asked Chris airily. "So Eleanor; are you go-eww! You already ate it?"

Eleanor had quickly eaten the cat food and gagged a little.

"That was a little gross … but it kinda tasted like purple so it wasn't so bad.2 Shrugged Eleanor as she sat back down in her seat.

* * *

**Confessional: Meow!**

**Spider: How can something taste like** *cough*** a color? It's not possible as far as I'm aware.**

**Tabitha:** (She has a deadpan expression).** I'm surrounding by **_**idiots**_**.**

**Eleanor: I love animals … and if it's good enough for cats I guess its good enough for me too.**

**Chris: Gross!**

* * *

It was Spider's turn next; he span the wheel of torture and it landed on Hector.

"Eat a five dollar bill." Said Chris with a wry smirk at Spider while handing him five dollars. "What a huge dilemma you have Spider … have the easiest five bucks you'll ever make? Or try for a million dollars that you might not even win."

"… Nice try Hector." Said Spider to the camera as he ate the five dollars.

"…That wasn't the result I was expecting; I thought you were greedy!" Whined Chris childishly.

"That's Tabitha that you are thinking of." Replied Spider as he sat back down.

* * *

**Confessional: All that glitters is not gold.**

**Tabitha: So what if I'm greedy; we're in a recession people!**

**Spider: Eleanor was right; things can taste** *cough*** like colors. That money tasted distinctly like moss** *cough*** green.**

* * *

Tabitha span the wheel and after a few rotations it stopped on Irene.

"Irene's dare is … kiss a tree branch … like you mean it. Haha! This is a good dare!" Laughed Chris as Chef handed Tabitha a tree branch.

"You gotta be kidding me." Groaned Tabitha.

"As Irene said; like you _mean_ it." Smirked Chris sadistically.

Tabitha was silent for a moment; she then swallowed her pride and began to kiss the tree branch while hoping this wouldn't find its way onto YouTube even though it probably would. After half a minute of forced wood kissing (no innuendo intended) Tabitha parted from the branch looking humiliated.

"That good enough for you?" Asked Tabitha angrily.

"Yes … yes it was." Laughed Chris.

Tabitha groaned as she sat back down in her seat and crossed her arms indignantly.

* * *

**Confessional: She was kissing a branch! *rimshot***

**Tabitha:** (She is covering her face with her right hand).** I don't even want to know what mum and daddy will say…**

**Eleanor: Go Irene! Great dare!**

**Chef: Kids these days; not even wanting to kiss a branch on a dare. Back in the war we had to make out with cacti's in the blistering desert heat!**

* * *

"Your turn again Eleanor; hopefully you'll get a hard and painful dare! Haha!" Sneered Chris as Eleanor got up to spin the wheel of torture.

Eleanor stomped on Chris's foot as she walked past him; while Chris howled in pain like a baby Eleanor span the spinner and it landed on Lavender.

"Get your legs waxed." Said Chris with an expression of nasty sadistic delight. "This'll be good! If you would just sit on the chair we can begin."

Eleanor sat on a chair that Chef had bought from backstage and pulled up one of her brown pant legs to reveal her left leg. Chris struck on a waxing strip and prepared to pull.

"Ready?" Asked Chris. "Because I can assure you that this is gonna hurt like _hell_!"

"… Just be gentle." Said Eleanor with a gulp.

"… Nope!" Sneered Chris as he yanked off the waxing strip.

"AAIYEEEEEEEEEE!" Screamed Eleanor in great pain.

"Ooo, that looks *cough* painful." Said Spider in concern.

"Rather her than us." Shrugged Tabitha.

"…You're a sadist, you know *cough* that?" Said Spider dryly.

"No; that's Uzuri." Replied Tabitha.

"But unlike you she's sweet and nice." Retorted Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Let's wax to the max!**

**Eleanor: … Ok; how in the world can anybody withstand pain like that? It really hurt!**

**Spider: Poor Eleanor; that looked extremely ***cough* **painful. This challenge is taking a toll on all of us.**

* * *

Spider was getting ready to do his next dare; this one was from Fifi. The former man hater's dare was to dip his hand in a bowl of boiling water for three seconds. It may not have seemed like a long time … but Spider knew full well how much it would hurt.

"Ok Spider; just submerge your hand for a trio of seconds and you pass." Smirked Chris. "Feel the burn or walk the dock of shame … the choice is yours."

Spider summoned his courage and put his hand in the boiling water while trying not to scream; three seconds passed and Spider retracted his arm like lightning.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, OW!" Wailed Spider in pain.

"And Spider is still in the game." Smirked Chris.

"Can I have some ice?" Asked Spider in hope that Chris would show some mercy.

"…Nope!" Laughed Chris. "But I could give you some red paint so you can make your other hand look just a red."

* * *

**Confessional: Paint your little red wagon.**

**Spider: **(He has a deadpan expression and his voice is dripping with sarcasm). **And once again Chris shows how** *sneeze*_**generous**_** and **_**caring**_** he can be … NOT!**

**Tabitha: Well … that'll make Spider's temperature rise more than normal.**

**Chef: Man; that looked really painful.**

* * *

Tabitha span the spinner on the wheel of torture and it landed on Carlton.

"This shouldn't be too hard." Smirked Tabitha.

"…This is a disappointing dare." Grumbled Chris. "Carlton's dare is to hug a lawn gnome."

"That's pretty weak." Agreed Eleanor.

"I think I can cope with this." Chuckled Tabitha as Chef handed her a lawn gnome which she hugged. "Done."

"…Just sit back down." Whined Chris as he grabbed the lawn gnome and tossed it over the thousand foot cliff and down to the lawn below.

* * *

**Confessional: Gnomeo and Juliet!**

**Chris: Some of these dares aren't as vicious and traumatizing as I hoped…**

**Fresh Water Man Eating Shark: **(It has a bump on its head and speaks with a Jamaican accent). **Ow! Somebody tossed a lawn gnome on me head Mon! That hurts!**

**Chef: Seriously; how can a shark get in the confessional? It shouldn't be able to leave the water!**

* * *

Eleanor's latest dare was from Quana.

"Quana's dare … you have to eat toilet paper." Said Chris with a smirk.

Eleanor looked absolutely revolted but when Chef handed her five squares of clean toiler paper Eleanor looked relieved and began to eat them, gagging every now and then.

"Chef! You #bleep# idiot!" Screamed Chris in rage. "You were supposed to give her used toilet paper!"

"You should have said so then." Shrugged Chef while clearly not caring at all.

* * *

**Confessional: *Insert toilet paper joke here***

**Eleanor: I suppose that could have been a _lot_ worse than it was.**

**Spider: Chris is even more irritable** *cough*** than Yosemite Sam.**

**Tabitha: … I have no comment.**

* * *

Spider span the spinner and it came to a stop on Daisy.

"Get hit by a dodgeball." Said Chris with a smirk as he took out a dodgeball. "To pass the dare you cannot shield yourself or try to deflect the ball."

"I'll take the dare." Said Spider in determination.

Chris aimed the dodgeball for a moment and then threw it full force at a very fast speed…

…

…

…

Right into Spider's crotch.

"…Ow." Whimpered Spider in a high pitched squeaky voice as he dropped to his knees.

"And Spider – snrrrk- gets to the next –hahaha- round." Laughed Chris in sadistic amusement.

"Shut … up … Chris." Whimpered Spider in pain.

* * *

**Confessional: Right in the balls!**

**Spider: I can't take much more of this challenge if the dares are going to keep being as painful as they are.**

**Eleanor: To strike another guy in the crotch is lower than a snake according to a YouTube comment I once read. Chris should be ashamed!**

**Tabitha: I actually didn't find that funny … but if it was Kasimar who received that I would have laughed.**

* * *

Tabitha gave the wheel of tortures spinner a hard spin; once it came to a stop it was pointing to Xaria.

"Flash your boobs." Smirked Chris.

"What?" Shrieked Tabitha in horror.

"Just joking! Haha! You should have seen the look on your stupid face! Haha!" Laughed Chris. "The real dare is to listen to the gummy bear song. Trust me when I say it's awful."

"I'll take the dare; how bad could it be?" Asked Tabitha as Chris handed herb some headphones.

"If you take the headphones off before the end of the song you'll be eliminated." Warned Chris as he pressed the play button on the CD player.

Instantly Tabitha looked to be in pain and held her head as though it was going to explode. A couple of minutes went by and eventually the song ended.

"Ok Tabitha; you pass." Said Chris as he took the headphones off Tabitha's head.

"Not a good song … not a good song … not a good song." Chanted Tabitha in a catatonic tone.

"She's *cough* catatonic Chris." Noted Spider.

"Was the song really that bad?" Asked Chris in confusion.

"Yes! It's probably the worst song in the world." Assured Eleanor.

"Good! I love seeing people suffer as long as it's not me who suffers." Laughed Chris sadistically.

* * *

**Confessional: Gummy bear; say hello to my shotgun!**

**Tabitha: I don't know what happened a few minutes ago; I just sort of blacked out. I wonder what caused that to happen.**

**Eleanor: Nobody should have to listen to the audio sewage that the gummy bear song is … but then again Tabitha kind of deserves it.**

**Chris: **(He is laughing his ass off).

* * *

Eleanor span the spinner again and it was decided that her next dare was going to be from Andy.

"Ooo; you're **not** going to like this dare at all! Haha!" Laughed Chris with a nasty sneer. "You have to read three chapters of Twilight!"

"Oh no; not *cough* that garbage." Groaned Eleanor.

"That's just plain _mean_." Agreed Spider.

"Twilight isn't _that _bad." Said Tabitha. "It's better than 'Where's Wally'."

"Whatever you say 'Bella'." Smirked Eleanor.

"… Whatever." Muttered Tabitha.

"Here's the book; enjoy." Said Chris as he handed Eleanor a copy of Twilight. "Personally I think it rocks but you're a little girl so you'll hate it! Haha!"

"Actually most girls like it." Called Chef from backstage.

"Shut up!" Screamed Chris in rage.

"I'll take the dare." Sighed Eleanor as she began to read the book.

* * *

**Confessional: Sparkly vampire's remind me of Big Gay Al from South Park!**

**Eleanor: That was so awful I almost puked!**

**Chris: Eleanor sucks! Come to think of it so do Spider and Tabitha and everyone in the universe besides the glorious me. I'm _that_ awesome. Haha!**

* * *

"You're up Spider; try not to get yourself killed … though it would be really good for ratings! Haha!" Sneered Chris.

Spider ignored Chris as he span the spinner on the wheel of torture.

"Hey! Pay attention when I insult you ya stupid asswipe!" Snarled Chris.

"The spinner landed on *cough* Vinnie; what's my next dare?" Asked Spider dully.

"… I hate you." Whine Chris before sighing bitterly. "Your next dare is to … no; we're not doing this!"

"What's the *cough* dare?" Asked spider curiously.

Chef grabbed the dare card off Chris.

"Your dare is to kick pretty boy in the crotch; either kick him in the 'little soldiers' or lose your chance at the million." Smirked Chef.

"Easy decision." Smirked Spider.

SHA-KICK!

Spider kicked Chris in the balls; Chris screamed in pain and dropped to hid knees while crying and sobbing like a little tiny baby.

"What a baby." Deadpanned Chef. "Either way you pass."

* * *

**Confessional: There goes any chance of Chris Junior.**

**Chef: That'll teach pretty boy for not giving me my pay check!**

**Tabitha: Tale that Chris!**

**Spider: Best. Dare. ***cough*** Ever!**

* * *

Tabitha gave the spinner a hard forceful spin and it landed on Raven.

"… Shake hands with Chris." Smirked Chris.

"How is this bad?" Asked Tabitha in confusion. "Sure; you're a nasty person … but it's not exactly torture is it?"

"…Just shake my hand stupid bitch." Muttered Chris.

Tabitha growled a little and shook Chris's hand.

ZAP!

"Ow!" Yelped Tabitha. "What the heck was that?"

"A hand buzzer!" Laughed Chris sadistically as he showed Tabitha the hand buzzer and laughed some more.

"… Get bent." Snapped Tabitha as she returned to her seat.

"Touchy." Said Chris with an ugly sneer.

* * *

**Confessional: Touchdown!**

**Chris: Is a little respect out of the question? These idiots are being so mean to me! Losers.**

**Chef: Respect is earned, not given you idiot!**

* * *

Eleanor had spun the torture wheel's spinner once more and it this time it landed on Uzuri.

"Eat a bowl of lima beans." Smirked Chris as he handed Eleanor a bowl of the disgusting beans as well as a spoon to eat them with.

"Lima beans are gross." Mumbled Eleanor as she began eating the disgusting beans and flinching as she did so.

"So totally sick!" Gagged Chris. "Why won't one of you losers just lose already? I have a life you know!"

"I seriously doubt that." Said Tabitha dryly.

"Shut up!" Whined Chris.

"Done." Said Eleanor sickly as she held her stomach and gagged. "Yuck! Those beans were even worse than olives!"

"Is that *cough* even possible?" Asked Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Nothing is impossible … just highly and _extremely_ improbable.**

**Eleanor: **(She is gargling mouth wash to get rid of the awful taste of the lima beans).

**Tabitha: Some of these dares are completely stupid … but since it was Uzuri's dare I suppose it is to be expected really.**

**Spider: … It's not our** *cough*** day is it?**

**Chris: Haha! The disgusted look on Eleanor's face was priceless! It sucks to be her!**

**Chef: **(He is just shaking his head).

* * *

"Well Spider; it looks like your next dare is from Yessica." Said Chris after Spider gave the spinner a spin. "Your dare is to jump off the thousand foot cliff."

"Oh … is *cough* that all?" Asked Spider in an attempt to be brave but his nervousness was clear.

"You don't have to … just a million dollars at stake; that's all I'm saying." Smirked Chris.

"…I'll do *cough* it." Gulped Spider.

Spider hesitantly approached the edge of the cliff and gulped as he looked down at the water a thousand feet below. His knees began to knock as he tried to summon the courage to make the drop.

"… We don't have all day wimp." Sneered Chris as he shoved Spider over the edge of the cliff.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaa." Screamed Spider as he fell down and down and down and finally into the safe zone with a big splash.

"And Spider completes his dare." Laughed Chris, "I wonder if the fall killed him."

BAM!

Chef punched Chris over the edge of the cliff and now it was Chris's turn to scream as he fell down to the water far below … and when he did he landed on his crotch…

That _had_ to hurt.

* * *

**Confessional: That bought back memories of season one!**

**Spider: Well; the fall was terrifying … but ***cough* **at least Chris fell on his crotch. **(Spider laughs).

**Chris: I'm gonna murder Chef! AARGH!**

* * *

A little while later when Spider and Chris were back at the top of the thousand foot cliff the challenge quickly continued. It was now Tabitha's turn to spin the wheel of torture. This time it landed on Mable.

"Have two marshmallows melted on your face." Smirked Chris. "So how about it Tabitha? Melt marshmallows or lose? The choice is yours."

"I'll take the dare." Said Tabitha confidently.

Tabitha was led over to a recliner seat; as she lay back Chef put two marshmallows on her face; one for each cheek. After that Chef took out a lighter and held it very close to the marshmallows which gradually started to melt. Tabitha started to look uncomfortable after a few seconds but bared it until the marshmallows were melted.

"Ow! These are hot!" Yelped Tabitha as she sat back up.

"And Tabitha completes the dare." Said Chris unenthusiastically. "Seriously; when is somebody going to lose?"

"Hopefully soon." Said Tabitha as she scratched the hot gooey marshmallows of her cheeks and discarded them.

"I would have thought somebody would have been eliminated by now; this is taking too long!" Whined Chris as Tabitha sat back in her seat behind her podium.

* * *

**Confessional: Chris is whinier than Veruca Salt!**

**Tabitha: Melted marshmallows? **(Tabitha groans). **How much longer can Spider and Eleanor keep this up?**

**Spider: I'm not gonna give ***cough* **up. This challenge may be insane ***cough* **but I'm gonna win this for Quana.**

**Eleanor: Giving up is for quitters and I'm no quitter!**

**Chris: If more people gave up there would be less wars! Somebody just quit already!**

* * *

"Eleanor; your turn." Muttered Chris impatiently.

Eleanor gave the wheel of torture's spinner a good spin; after a bit of spinning it landed on Carlton.

"This shouldn't be too bad." Smiled Eleanor.

"This sucks … Carlton's next dare it to hug a dinosaur plushie." Grumbled Chris in exasperation as he handed Eleanor a cuddly toy version of a Tyrannosaurus Rex.

"Aww! It's so cuddly!" Squeed Eleanor as she hugged the plushie.

"I should have had the foresight to predict that any dare that Carlton could think of would be stupid and lame." Sighed Chris. "Just sit back down so we can move on."

* * *

**Confessional: Dino might! *rimshot* Ow! Stop rimshooting me!**

**Eleanor: That dare was kinda enjoyable; I've always had a liking for stuffed cuddly toys. I actually have a collection of them back home.**

* * *

Spider had spun the spinner and this time his dare was to come from Daisy.

"Daisy's dare … put your hand in a mousetrap." Laughed Chris as he reached into his pocket.

SNAP!

"OW!" Wailed Chris as he flailed his hand about; a mousetrap was clamped to it. Chris pulled it off and frowned. "Just stick your hand in this and you pass … unless you want to quit."

"…I'll take the *cough* dare." Declared Spider as, with a little hesitation, he put his hand in the mousetrap.

SNAP!

"YOWCH!" Yelped Spider in pain. He pulled his hand free and had an expression like a sour apple.

"That *sneeze* hurt … a lot!" Groaned Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: Mouse trap was a hard board game to setup! The trap kept falling over!**

**Chris: Sucks to be Spider!**

**Tabitha: That looked like it hurt … rather Spider than me though.**

**Eleanor: I dread what my next dare might be…**

* * *

Tabitha gave the spinner of the wheel of torture a hard spin; after about seven seconds of rotation is slowed down and came to a stop…

…

…

…

…

…

On Kasimar.

"Oh yeah!" Whooped Chris. "All of you may have been very resilient up to this point, but this challenge ends here and now! Kasimar's dares were all very extreme."

"What dares did he supply?" Asked Tabitha with a gulp.

"Some of the dares I can name off hand are poking your eyes out with a scalpel, cutting of your fingers with a hacksaw, setting yourself on fire, swimming in shark infested waters with an open wound, that sort of thing."

"…Oh my *cough* god." Said Spider sounding quite sickened.

"Sadly all of those dares were discarded for being 'too extreme; or some crap like that." Said Chris with an eye roll while Chef walked out from backstage. "But there was one of his dares that was acceptable to use in the challenge?"

"What was that?" Asked Tabitha while sounding worried.

"…Get beaten up by Chef." Grinned Chris sadistically.

At the words 'beaten up' the color drained out of Tabitha's face and a look of actual _fear_ appeared on her face while Chef Hatchet cracked his knuckles.

"What's it gonna be Tabitha?" Gloated Chris. "Get beaten up a pulp? Or lose your chance at the million."

As Chef began to approach Tabitha the scared rich girl began to back away while shaking. Due to the fact Tabitha was walking backwards she wasn't looking where she was going and she tripped over a small rock.

"Whoa!" Yelped Tabitha as she fell backwards right into the open confessional.

The force of Tabitha falling into the confessional combined with the fact it was balanced on the edge of the steep slope down to the foot of the cliff caused the confessional to tilt backwards, overbalance and start to roll down the steep hill with Tabitha inside it.

As the confessional picked speed Chris laughed while Spider and Eleanor exchanged a glance.

"…Shouldn't we help *cough* her?" Asked Spider.

"But it's funny." Whined Chris. "…Oh fine; let's get the helicopter."

* * *

**Confessional: Down the hill we go!**

**Tabitha: **(She is getting tossed around and bumped). **OW! EEK! OW! OUCH! OOF! HELP!**

* * *

After about a minute of rolling, at which point the confessional had picked up a lot of speed, the confessional came to a stop by hitting a log. This threw Tabitha out at quite a force and into a painful heap onto the ground.

"Owwwww." Groaned Tabitha as she lay on the ground in pain. "I think I sprained my ankle. Owwwww."

A helicopter landed nearby and out of it stepped Chris, Chef, Eleanor and Spider.

"If I've learned anything about the alphabet this season it's that T is for tumble! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically. "Are you hurt Tabitha?"

"A bit, yes. Owww." Nodded Tabitha.

"Well; you sure withstood some pain; but you left us hanging about your dare." Smirked Chris.

"… Fine; Chef can beat me up, go ahead, I'm already in pain so a little more won't be that bad." Groaned Tabitha.

"That won't be necessary, we can forget about your dare." Said Chris with a suddenly very nasty expression. "Tabitha … you are now eliminated from Total Drama Letterz."

"What? But I'm accepting the dare!" Said Tabitha while holding her hip in pain.

"True; but remember I said that you needed to accept your dare within a minute; you've taken longer than a minute to accept your dare so … you're out! Haha!" Laughed Chris.

Tabitha managed to sit up and had a look of horror, anger and panic on her face.

"Does this mean…" Began Eleanor.

"Yep; Eleanor … you and Spider are the final two of Total Drama Letterz and have a one in two chance of winning a million dollars!"

"Woohoo! Yeehaw!" Cheered Eleanor as she danced on the spot in victory.

"Alright!" Cheered Spider.

"It's dock of shame time Tabitha." Smirked Chris.

"… Noooooooooooooo!" Wailed Tabitha as she collapsed onto her back due to the pain in her body.

* * *

**Confessional: And so it was that the rich girl fell!**

**Eleanor: I made it! I'm in the final two! I'm gonna win this for you Jimmy!**

**Spider: So I'm in the final ***cough* **two? … I honestly never expected to get ***cough* **this far.**

* * *

A while later Tabitha sat aboard the boat of losers as it began to sail away from Wawanakwa Island. Spider and Eleanor watched it sail away with the oddly silent manipulator on board; as Spider watched it sail away he couldn't help but notice some fear in Tabitha's face.

"Tabitha looks … afraid; I *cough* wonder why." Pondered Spider.

"Maybe it's because she's going to somewhere full of people who hate her." Guessed Eleanor. "Man, what a way to go. That was really harsh."

"And yet it was somewhat *cough* deserved." Murmured Spider.

* * *

Chris stood on the dock of shame with a big smile on his face. He began making grand gestures with his arms while doing the outro for the episode.

"And so Tabitha's time on Total Drama Letter's has come to an end. With her gone only a guy and a girl remain; Spider and Eleanor. Who will cheer for which person in the final challenge? What will the final challenge be? Will Wallace drop by for some cheating? And who will be crowned champion of Total Drama Letterz? Find out in the final episode of Total ... Drama … Letterz!"

* * *

Voted off: Daisy, Patch, Fifi, Nakia, Carlton, Yessica, Hector, Zita, Andy, Irene, Wallace, Gary, Raven, Vinnie, Daisy again, Oscar, Mable, Uzuri, Andy again, Xaria, Quana, Barney, Nakia again, Kasimar, Jimmy, Lavender, Tabitha.

* * *

And at long last, Tabitha is out. Tabitha was a very interesting character to write for; she is quite stuck up, mean and manipulative … but it isn't necessarily her own fault she is like this due to her parents DELIBERATLY raising her to be like that. Some of you hated Tabitha, some of you loved her. I myself am quite fond of her believe it or not. Just to let you know … Tabitha's story is FAR from over. Let's just say it will continue into T.D.L.2.

Next Time: Eddie and Sasha return and are going to interview Jimmy, Lavender and Tabitha. A few special guests drop in as well!


	60. Total Ousted Alphabet 6

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet them; that belongs to Frank15 and his great story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's plus all the special guests that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains corny jokes, special visitors, insults, hate mail and other such stuff. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Current Poll Standings:** So far both Spider and Eleanor have one vote each. Though the winner has been decided LONG ago you can still vote; I'm always interested to see what the fans think.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note:** Sorry for not updating this earlier; I've been really sick lately so it has cut down on writing time. But I've been feeling better today so here's chapter sixty of Total Drama Letterz; I hope you all enjoy it, and if you do enjoy it then why not leave a review and tell me what you think, I'd appreciate it. :)

Penultimate Peril!

* * *

A number of bright stage lights shone down onto the stage of Total Ousted Alphabet. As always a large number of people with no real importance to the story were in the audience ready to watch the latest episode of Total Ousted Alphabet.

To the right of the stage was the high rise sofa; sitting on the bottom row from left to right were Gary, Raven, Yessica, Daisy, Irene, Barney, Andy and Mable. Sitting from left to right on the middle row were Vinnie, Uzuri, Carlton, Fifi, Zita, Oscar, Xaria and Patch. Sitting on the top row from left to right were Wallace, Quana, Hector and Nakia. Kasimar was sitting on a seat next to the high rise sofa restrained by chains.

Sasha was sitting in her chair but this time she wasn't playing a video game. She was looking at her watch and at backstage. This was because Eddie was absent from his seat.

"Where's Eddie?" Asked Quana.

"I don't know." Replied Sasha. "He said he might be late to the show … but we're on in less than a minute! Where is he?"

"Maybe he's dead." Smirked Kasimar.

ZAP!

Sasha had taken out a remote and pressed a button which electrocuted Kasimar and made him go silent for at least a little while.

"You're on in twenty five seconds." Said a cameraman intern.

Just then Eddie ran from backstage and sat in his seat while putting his note book in his pocket.

"Where have you been?" Asked Sasha. "We're about to go on air!"

"Sorry; I just had to make a few 'phone calls'." Replied Eddie mysteriously.

"To who yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"You'll find out in the next aftermath." Assured Eddie with a glint in his eyes.

"You're on in three, two one." Said the cameraman.

Eddie and Sasha smiled for the camera and waved.

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Greeted Eddie.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Smiled Sasha.

"Welcome to the penultimate, as in second to last, episode of Total Ousted Alphabet. Today we are going to interview the campers who placed fifth, fourth and third. And considering the fact there were twenty six contestants at the start, getting that far is really something." Said Eddie enthusiastically.

"Only two contestants remain in the game now; Spider and Eleanor. Funnily enough both of them have the same letters starting there names as we do." Said Sasha in realization.

"It's almost as if it was meant to be." Agreed Eddie. "It's been a long competition but it's nearly over at last. So many things have happened along with a lot of drama, hilarity, heartbreak and horrors."

"I'll say." Agreed Gary as he glared hatefully at Kasimar who just shrugged indifferently.

"None of us know what the final challenge will be; but one thing is for certain … it's going to be very difficult." Voiced Sasha. "Personally I'm rooting for Eleanor."

"I myself am rooting for Spider." Replied Eddie.

"As am I." Said Quana dreamily.

"Tonight's first guest is the youngest person in the competition at ten years old, he managed to defeat the monster known as Kasimar, he always did the right thing and he always sees the good in a situation. Give it up for Jimmy!" Cheered Sasha.

Jimmy walked out from backstage and the audience completely exploded into applause. Jimmy waved to the audience as he sat down in the interviewee chair.

"Welcome to the show Jimmy." Greeted Sasha. "How does it feel to be here?"

"Like a million bucks … though that's kind of ironic due to the fact I'm out of the game." Chuckled Jimmy. "But I'm content with how far I got so it's no big deal."

"You most definitely proved that size and physical strength don't matter in a competition; you got to the final five simply by being kind and nice; I'd say that's really cool." Smiled Sasha.

"And I say its complete bullshit!" Scoffed Kasimar.

ZAP!

Sasha pressed the remote again which zapped Kasimar and shut him up again.

"What was your favorite of the challenges?" Asked Eddie.

"I'd say the Cosplay challenge because I won immunity and it was fun to dress up as a fictional character." Answered Jimmy. "But to be honest I liked most of the challenges; it's been a really memorable and enjoyable summer."

"I agree." Said Barney. "We've made friends that we'll never ever forget … and we've met people we _wish_ we could forget."

"Nit me." Snapped Kasimar.

"Yeah; shut up you retard!" Snarled Nakia.

"Hair today gone tomorrow." Smirked Barney.

"Shut up!" Growled Nakia while sounding dangerously angry.

"Come o guys; leave her alone, it's 'fryday' and we know bald boiled eggs hate that day." Joked Irene.

Nakia stayed silent but her face was turning red in extreme anger.

"You almost won the whole competition Jimmy; if Tabitha hadn't manipulated you there is a good chance you would have won. How did you feel about losing?" Asked Eddie.

"A wise pirate once told me that a life without failure is a life without experience. You win some you lose some." Shrugged Jimmy with a smile.

"What about when you learned Tabitha had played on your guilty conscience when she learned about what you did to get Kasimar kicked off?" Inquired Eddie.

"I don't regret what I did; Kasimar is just … cringe inducing. But I felt ba not because of the victim, but because I'd cheated while everyone else hadn't … or so I thought." Replied Jimmy. "I would have liked the money but at least Eleanor is in the finals; because of that I can easily call my time on the show a victory."

"How can it be a victory? You lost!" Sneered Daisy.

"Some things are worth more than money." Replied Jimmy. "Like Eleanor."

The crowd and a number of those of the peanut gallery all 'awwwwwwed'.

"How long do you think your little relationship will last?" Sneered Daisy. "You'll probably have a petty argument and your heart will be broken. Kids lack intelligence and maturity."

From backstage a large water balloon filled with blue jelly was thrown at Daisy and exploded all over her.

"My cloths! Aaaaargh!" Screamed Daisy as she ran screaming backstage to the other side that the jelly balloon was thrown from while everyone laughed.

"I'll never tire of that joke." Chuckled Hector.

"Me neither." Laughed Yessica.

"Seeing somebody cry and sob is so funny! Mwahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace manically. "It reminds me of my three main goals in life."

"What are they dare I ask?" Asked Jimmy uncertainly.

"Folding a piece of paper twenty times, getting Shane Dawson, Fred and Smosh suspended from YouTube and writing a book on how to take over the world in three easy steps." Replied Wallace.

"It's impossible to fold paper that many times." Said Hector promptly.

"That's what they want you to think." Smirked Wallace.

"Here's another question Jimmy … what do you think my next question will be?" Asked Eddie.

"I don't know … but I hope it's not to ask if you can borrow a cup of sugar, I hate it when people ask that. Get it yourself ya freeloader!" Joked Jimmy which earned a few laughs from the audience and peanut gallery.

"How did it feel to conquer your fear of Freddy Krueger in the fear challenge?" Asked Sasha.

"It felt great; a real confidence booster y'know." Smiled Jimmy before pondering on something. "If you guys don't mind me asking … what are you afraid of?"

"I'm scared of clowns and Sasha is scared of the Waterwraith, an enemy from Pikmin." Replied Eddie.

"Actually … I've recently found a new fear." Said Sasha with a shiver. "Giygas."

"What's that?" Asked Jimmy.

"You do _not_ want to know; but it's a heavily disturbing boss in Earthbound. I played it the other day on my SNES … and gosh, it's _creepy_." Gulped Sasha. "And as for what it's based on…"

"Let's move on." Said Eddie uneasily before smiling warmly. "Jimmy; I can't help but notice that you are dating a certain animal lover. Care to comment on that?"

"Sure; I just … like her. Is it so wrong to be with somebody you care about regardless of your age?" Asked Jimmy. "She's a sweetheart, she's cute and Eleanor is equally as kind and wonderful as Kasimar is evil and soulless."

"Shut up rat!" Snarled Kasimar.

ZAP!

"OW! That hurt!" Wailed Kasimar after Sasha had zapped him.

"I personally think it's really sweet that you two are going out." Smiled Quana. "Young love isn't wrong; after all, 'love is love'."

"Now Jimmy; before we move onto your fan mail … we've got a little surprise for you." Grinned Eddie. "You know how you've mention your friends Ted, Pablo, Ricky and Charles every now and then?"

"Yeah; why?" Asked Jimmy.

"How'd you like them to congratulate you on hoe well you did?" Asked Sasha. "Come on out guys!"

Out from backstage walked Ted, Pablo, Ricky and Charles. Jimmy looked pleased to see them.

"Guys! What are you doing here?" Asked Jimmy before shrugging. "All the same it's good to see you!"

"It's good to see you too … though it'd be nicer to see you a million dollars richer." Chuckled Ted. "Eddie and Sasha gave us a call and asked if we'd like to be guests for this aftermath; how could we refuse right? We get to be on TV!"

"So these are your friends are they Jimmy?" Asked Mable with a smile.

Ricky approached Wallace.

"Can I have your autograph?" Asked Ricky.

"Mwahahahaha! I was asked for an autograph before anyone else! Take that!" Laughed Wallace evilly as he sighed Ricky's piece of paper.

"It's been great watching you on TV Jimmy." Smiled Pablo as he fist bumped with Jimmy. "You may not have won; but I'm rich anyway and you managed to eliminate Kasimar so … all's well that ends well."

"Aren't you mad that I didn't win?" Asked Jimmy nervously.

"Not at all." Replied Pablo with a smile.

"On the contrary we wouldn't have cared if you were the first voted off; you actually got on the show and that's an achievement in itself." Assured Charles.

"Thanks guys; too bad I didn't win though."

"You may not have but I won something." Grinned Ted as he took ten twenty dollar bills out of his pocket. "I won these by making a few bets with the other kids in the neighborhood. I bet that you'd take out Kasimar, and you did, we're two hundred bucks richer!"

Ted handed Jimmy two twenty's.

"Here's your share."

"I think I know how we can celebrate once we get home; we can order Chinese food!" Cheered Jimmy.

"Awesome!" Grinned Ricky.

"Want to here your fan mail Jimmy?" Asked Eddie.

"Sure." Nodded Jimmy as Ted, Ricky, Charles and Pablo sat on the triple rowed sofa.

Eddie walked off stage; a few moments later he dragged a fairly large bag of fan mail onto the stage and took out a letter.

"The first letter is from Robbie." Said Eddie as he began to read the fan mail. "Dear Jimmy; what do you get if you cross an octopus with a chicken? … One leg for everyone in the family at Christmas Dinner."

"Heheehee! Good one." Laughed Jimmy. "Though it would have been better if a millipede replaced the octopus; then threw would be a leg for everyone in the neighborhood!"

"But there isn't much meat on millipede legs." Pointed out Gary.

"He's got a point." Nodded Raven.

"The next letter is from Pinto … odd name." Mused Eddie as he opened the second letter. "Dear Jimmy; you like Candy right? What is your least favorite type of candy?"

"I would have to say Snickers or Turkish Delight. I just never really liked the taste of either of them." Answered Jimmy. "As most of you know, my favorite type of candy is jelly beans."

"I like chocolate." Said Patch dumbly.

"I like crystallized pineapple." Drooled Irene.

"Last letter." Said Eddie as he opened a third letter. "Dear Jimmy; you're awesome! You roxxors my soxxors; it is truly an inspiration that you got so far by just being nice. Good job showing everyone that size doesn't matter! From Zelda; hmm, that name sounds familiar."

"That's the name of the princess in the Legend of Zelda series." Explained Sasha.

"Thanks; I knew I'd heard it before."

"That was a very nice letter." Smiled Jimmy in appreciation.

"It's been great talking with you Jimmy; but we've got to move onto our second guest; would it be alright if you sat with the rest of the peanut gallery?" Asked Sasha.

"Not a problem." Replied Jimmy as he got up from the interviewee seat and sat next to Pablo on the high rise sofa.

"Our next guest proved that cheerleaders are not always mean and stupid, was the last member of Team Grenade in the competition, hooked up with a pirate and kissed a girl; give a round of applause for Lavender!" Announced Sasha.

The audience exploded into applause as Lavender walked on stage while looking embarrassed at what Sasha had said.

"I wish people wouldn't keep bringing that up." Groaned Lavender.

"Come on; you know you enjoyed it." Grinned Quana goofily.

"It was a flippin _dare_; nothing more and nothing less." Blushed Lavender as she sat down in the interviewee chair.

"You didn't say no yaaar." Smirked Barney.

"… Can we just get on with the interview?" Pleaded Lavender.

"Sure; first question, is Quana a good kisser?" Joked Eddie.

Lavender turned as red as her hair and groaned.

"Just joking." Assured Eddie. "Real first question; do you feel you've proved the cheerleader stereotype wrong?"

"I certainly feel that I have; maybe now people won't look at a cheerleader and say 'oh look, she's stupid and mean'. Seriously; that stereotype gets pretty annoying after a while." Grumbled Lavender.

"Good thing you went above and beyond the call of duty and proved it completely false." Smiled Xaria. "And even if the stereotype was true, you'd be one of the exceptions."

"Thanks Xaria." Smiled Lavender.

"You managed to make it to the final four and thus were very close to winning; how did it feel to be voted off?" Asked Sasha sympathetically.

"It felt pretty bad; I'd been backstabbed by Tabitha. We were kind of allied … and I paid the price. It's a shame I lost … but I outlasted Kasimar and Tabitha's cover got blown; so it wasn't all bad." Shrugged Lavender before sighing. "Still; it would have been nice to win."

"You're a winner to me mermaid." Smiled Barney tenderly.

"Thanks Barney." Said Lavender sweetly.

"That brings me along to my next question; what do you think of your relationship with Barney?" Asked Eddie with a smirk.

"Well … err … umm." Stuttered Lavender nervously. "I like him … a lot. We just sort of fell together and became attracted to each other over time. He's a real gentleman and treats me well. That's all you are getting."

"Aww! But I wanted to hear some private super sexy details!" Frowned Irene.

A few members of the peanut gallery stared at Irene.

"...What? You were all thinking it!" Justified Irene.

"I wasn't." Said Mable with a look of amusement.

"Me neither." Mumbled Jimmy.

"I dunno; sounds very interesting to me." Giggled Uzuri.

"Aaaaaanyway; next question, what was your favorite moment on the show?" Asked Sasha to hastily change the subject.

"When Kasimar was eliminated and then started crying like a baby." Smirked Lavender. "And let's not forget how I kicked him in the balls; I'm going to buy the DVD of the show and watch that moment over and over and _over_."

"Shut up you little wretch!" Snarled Kasimar murderously. "When I get out of this chair I'm gonna destroy you! And besides; you lost as well."

"You can act as aggressive and brutal as you like Kasimar … but I am _not_ intimidated by you. You're just a coward." Said Lavender coolly. "Besides; fourth place is better than sixth place."

Kasimar just glowered silently in rage.

"Oh how the mighty of fallen." Smirked Raven.

"And how the queen bees have become bald." Said Quana while gesturing to Nakia.

"Get bent!" Growled Nakia.

"Chris seemed to treat you pretty badly for little to no reason throughout most of the show; what did you think of that?" Asked Eddie gently.

"I really don't know why he hated me so much; it was just annoying at first … but it kinda hurt my feelings after a while. I mean; how would you like it if somebody hated you for no reason? It's not a nice feeling." Said Lavender in a slightly sad sounding voice.

"I can relate to that; Chris was such a meanie and a terrible bully towards me." Frowned Uzuri.

"Don't worry girls; call it detective instinct but … I don't think Chris is going to be able to retreat from his karma for _much_ longer." Said Eddie with a sudden devious look that lasted a mere moment but everyone noticed it.

"Is there something you aren't telling us?" Asked Lavender suspiciously.

"You'll find out tomorrow." Said Eddie simply. "In the meantime; how does it feel to have been the last member standing of your team?"

"Well; it felt good that I was the only member of the team to outlast Kasimar … but at the same time it kinda sucked that I'd lost all the nice people who had been on my team; everyone besides Kasimar had a good side … even Wallace oddly enough."

"All lies!" Declared Wallace. "I'm evil; and that's that!"

"Then why did you let Eleanor beat you back no day twenty five so that she would win immunity?" Asked Carlton.

"… Whatever." Grumbled Wallace.

"So Lavender; before we move onto the fan mail we've got one last question to ask you …Team Edward or Team Jacob?" Asked Sasha.

"… I don't read crap." Said Lavender flatly with a stony expression.

"Right answer." Said Sasha as she walked backstage and came back on with a large sack of fan mail.

"Is all that mail for me?" Blinked Lavender in surprise.

"Yep; you're one of the most popular contestants." Explained Sasha as she took out a letter and opened it. "Dear Lavender; you have such an ironic name! You're called Lavender yet you don't wear any of that color at all. Have you ever considered living up to your name or do you just hate that color? From Jared."

"I just like the color red." Shrugged Lavender. "Would you all wear apples if you were called apple? I can't exactly help the color of my schools cheerleader uniform can I?"

"Why do cheerleaders always wear short skirts anyway?" Asked Oscar.

"Good question." Agreed Zita.

"For fan service." Stated Irene.

"I don't doubt that." Smirked Sasha as she opened another letter. "Dear Lavender; have you ever made out heavily with the quarterback under the bleachers? From Mort."

"How rude!" Said Lavender in an affronted voice. "I have a lot more class than that! Who would even have the nerve to ask that?"

"You know it's true you little sl-" Began Kasimar.

Zap!"

Sasha used the remote to electrocute Kasimar into silence.

"Shut it!" Hissed Sasha angrily.

"Make me!" Sneered Kasimar.

Mable punched Kasimar in the back of the head from where she was sitting.

"Ow!" Wailed Kasimar in pain.

"Nice punch Mable." Complimented Sasha as she opened the third letter. "Anyway; dear Lavender, you totally proved the cheerleader stereotype wrong! That's one stereotype down and a heck of a lot more to disprove … but it's a start and wee have you to thank for that. I'm rooting for you! From Sherri."

"Well; at least I had one bit of decent fan mail … thanks Sherri." Smiled Lavender to the camera.

"It's been a great interview Lavender; but whether we like it or not we still have one person left to interview tonight so can you sit with the peanut gallery?" Asked Eddie.

"Sure." Said Lavender as she got up and approached the peanut gallery; Irene moved up to the top row while Lavender sat down next to Barney.

"Our final guest of the night was directly responsible for the eliminations of a lot of her competition, manipulated and backstabbed people with little remorse, is from one of the richest families in the world, used blackmail and has two purple died streaks in her hair, it's Tabitha!" Announced Eddie.

Tabitha lightly limped on stage due to her injury from earlier while the crowd booed, hissed and jeered. Tabitha sat in the interviewee seat looking like she didn't really want to be there.

"So Tabitha; welcome to Total Ousted Alphabet." Greeted Eddie.

"Can we hurry this up? I'd like to just go to my room and be alone." Said Tabitha as she avoided making eye contact with the others.

"By contract you are required to stay until the interview is over." Stated Sasha.

"…Fine." Mumbled Tabitha.

"So; first question, how does it feel to have been eliminated from Total Drama Letterz?" Asked Sasha.

"How do you think it feels?" Asked Tabitha dryly. "I was so close to the end and I lost because of an awful dare by that sociopath!"

"Be thankful Chris didn't allow my more 'interesting' dares." Smirked Kasimar. "Being beat up isn't so bad; it's great fun to watch! Yahahahaha!"

"You deserved it!" Growled Uzuri. "You're nothing more than a cold hearted lying, cheating rat!"

"I did what I had to." Stated Tabitha.

"You really looked afraid when the dare was announced; why was that?" Asked Eddie curiously.

Tabitha looked afraid for the smallest fraction of a second.

"Would any of you like to be beaten up?" Asked Tabitha incredulously.

"Well; how about this … why the heck did you ally with Kasimar?" Deadpanned Sasha. "Surely you knew it was a bad idea in the first place."

"I needed an ally; one that had no form of common decency or morals; someone who would have no problem about taking out the competition in any way possible." Replied Tabitha.

"Someone like you then." Scowled Quana.

"Look; sorry for getting you eliminated but it was necessary, nothing personal." Said Tabitha professionally and very slightly apologetically.

"You only eliminated me so that Spider would be upset!" Growled Quana.

"Not to mention you allied with Nakia as well yaaar." Put in Barney.

"Dirty rotten cheater." Glared Lavender.

"Just so you guys know; I _deeply_ regret allying with those two monsters … I may not be the nicest person in the world, but I think I'm a _bit_ above Kasimar and Nakia." Frowned Tabitha.

"How so? You blackmailed me into keeping silent and threatened to have Mable made homeless if I said anything." Glared Andy.

"But you might recall the fact I was genuinely _horrified_ when Mable got her injury." Reasoned Tabitha.

"You still told Kasimar to hurt her." Retorted Andy. "You should have known he'd go to extremes."

"That brings me along to the next question; why did you resort to all the underhanded scheming that you did?" Asked Sasha. "Why did you manipulate Uzuri and blackmail other people? You're rich already so why would you need the money?"

"My personal needs are none of your business." Stated Tabitha. "Who says I wanted the money anyway? It could have been for the fame and the glory. Either way I'm not telling."

"Why? Because you're too _cowardly_ to face the backlash for your actions?" Asked Hector.

"I. Am. Not. A. Coward." Glowered Tabitha. "You know; I may be rich and have everything I want, but even I have my own personal problems you know!"

"So … how does it feel that you were outlasted by a guy with a lot of illness and a preteen animal lover?" Asked Eddie hesitantly.

"It's bloody humiliating." Groaned Tabitha. "Mum and dad will not be best pleased…"

"I doubt they're gonna be best pleased by your behavior." Said Vinnie.

"I thought they encouraged it." Whispered Jimmy to Pablo and Ted.

"You know what I say? Nobody in this world is truly nice! We live in a selfish self serving cruel society; you have to use your words and charms to push yourself ahead of the people around you. If some people fall by the wayside then that's just life. Anybody who says they are selfless and truly nice is a filthy hypocrite; nobody is truly selfless or kind hearted, it's just how we are. TV shows like Total Drama are designed to be played in the way I did. It's all about politics and using your words to survive elimination. And I proved that; I attended the most elimination ceremonies and I passed all of them. I just lost due to bad luck; just like how Spider ands Eleanor only succeeded through dumb luck. And I haven't just lost the money you know…" Tabitha trailed off while the audience and peanut gallery went temporarily silent due to the strong effect of her speech.

"… I think we should move onto the next question." Said Sasha quietly.

"I agree." Nodded Eddie.

"Do you like chocolate?" Asked Patch.

"I don't eat chocolate; mum and daddy never let me." Said Tabitha idly.

"I got a question; are you sorry about what you did?" Demanded Uzuri.

"I admit some of the things I did were a little unorthodox … but it's just strategy, I don't really have much to regret seeing as I'm never gonna see any of you guys again once the show ends." Shrugged Tabitha.

"Well; I think we can move onto the fan mail now." Said Eddie as he walked backstage and hurled a decently large sized sack of letters on stage and took a letter out of the sack. "Looks like a lot of people want to get in touch with you."

"I can't say I'm not curious to hear what they have to say." Said Tabitha while glancing at the bulky mail sack.

"Ok; first letter." Said Eddie as he opened the letter. "Dear Tabitha, I hope you die horribly and painfully in a fire, from Bradley … err … ouch."

Eddie screwed up the letter while Tabitha looked a little surprised at how hateful the letter was.

"Ok; this next letter is from China." Said Eddie as he opened a second letter. "Dear Tabitha; I hope you drown in the ocean … that was a bit overboard."

Eddie tore up the letter while Tabitha seemed a little upset.

"Ok; maybe this letter will be nicer." Said Eddie hopefully as he opened a third letter. "Dear Tabitha; you should be ashamed of yourself. All of the things you have done, while not exactly as brutal as what Kasimar did, are absolutely appalling and disgraceful. Do you think anyone is ever going to want anything to do with you now that they've seen you on international television? You are inevitably going to die sad and alone and nobody will care once you die. I hope you have a long think about what you've done and see that it wasn't right. From Jeremy…"

Eddie trailed off and silently tossed the letter away while Tabitha sat frozen in shock at the hateful letters she had received. Though nobody noticed it a single tear exited Tabitha's eye.

"Well; I guess that's all we've got time for." Said Eddie as he turned to the camera. "It's going to be quite a dramatic finale tomorrow isn't it? Who will win the million dollars and who will be the runner up?"

"I'll be satisfied with whoever wins." Said Sasha.

"Well; this has been the penultimate episode of Total Ousted Alphabet; I'm Eddie Lynmoire."

"And I'm Sasha Tasset."

"And see you next time." Said Eddie and Sasha in usion.

"And cut; we're off the air, good job as always you two." Said one of the cameraman interns.

The former campers as well as Eddie and Sasha began to leave while Kasimar stayed stuck in his seat.

"Hey! Let me out!" Yelled Kasimar.

"Oh shut up!" Said Lavender.

As everyone began to disperse Tabitha took out her Windows Handheld Mailbox (or W.H.M is you prefer) and turned it on.

"Maybe I'll let some signal now that I'm off the island." Said Tabitha. "Maybe I can listen to some queen songs to relax myself … hmm; three hundred messages? That's odd."

Tabitha began to read the messages that had been sent to her from various people; and as she did so she began to feel more and more shocked, horrified and scared.

* * *

And that's the sixth episode of Total Ousted Alphabet. Let's just say that the events at the end of this chapter are the start of a major plot point for the future. But now only a trio of chapters remain before Total Drama Letterz is officially complete.

Who are you rooting for? Eleanor or Spider?

Next Time: The final trial.


	61. Day 28, Part 1, Vowel VS Consanant

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his magnificent story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains a nasty host, blue jelly, evil laughter, a jar of pickles, a bow and arrow, kissing and much more. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Poll Result: **The poll result is unchanged since the previous chapter; one vote for Eleanor and one vote for Spider. Thank you to the two people who voted.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **It has been almost a year since I started TDL, a year since you were introduced to the twenty six characters in this story. And now, here we are in the final episode with the final challenge! Woohoo! It doesn't feel like much time has past really. Doesn't time fly when you are having fun eh? Enjoy the first part of episode twenty eight everyone!

The final challenge is here!

* * *

Chris Maclean stood on the Dock of Shame while the sunshine shone down onto Wawanakwa and reflected of the briny blue waves washing up against the beach. Chris smiled for the camera and began the final recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Letterz. Only three of the original twenty six campers remained in the game; Eleanor, Spider and Tabitha. I aimed to push them to the limits with a brutal semi final challenge based off season one's famous 'I triple dog dare you' challenge but with a few tweaks. This time, no freebies and no passing a dare on! Whoever failed to complete a dare first would instantly be eliminated from the competition! Haha!"

"The dares came thick and fast; they ranged from mundane things such as getting a wedgie to extreme dares like listening to the incredibly awful gummy bear theme song. I would have thought one of them would have fallen sooner or later because all of them are pretty wimpy and pathetic, especially when compared to the magnificent me, but also because I didn't have all night, I have a life you know!"

"The dares went on and on and still nobody was dropping out … but then Tabitha spun Kasimar! All but one of Kasimar's dares had been deemed too extreme and horrible to be allowed in the challenge … but the dare that was allowed was awesome in itself … getting beaten up by Chef Hatchet. Due to being a little wimp Tabitha backed away as Chef advanced on her and ended up tripping no a rock and falling backwards into the open confessional which rolled down the thousand foot cliff with her in it! Haha! She ended up pretty injured much to my amusement."

"Because Tabitha had not accepted the dare within a minute of it being revealed she was eliminated from the game. This means our final two are Eleanor and Spider … and they are the last two I would have ever expected, seriously! One's a weak little girl and the other is a wimpy guy with a lot of illness … but whether we like it or not one of them is going to be a million dollars richer by sundown."

"So who's going to win it all? Eleanor or Spider? The healthy or the sick? The vowel or the consonant? The girl or the guy? And what is their final trial going to be? Find out in the final episode of Total Drama Letterz!"

* * *

(Theme song, I wanna be famous).

* * *

Eleanor and Spider were sitting in the mess hall eating breakfast; it was going to be the last time they ate in the mess hall since it was the final day of the competition. Against all the odds, challenges and obstacles Eleanor and Spider were the final two of Total Drama Letterz.

"Can you believe this Spider?" Asked Eleanor through a mouth of toast. "We're in the finals! We've outlasted everyone else, us, of all people."

"I can hardly believe *cough* it also." Agreed Spider. "I actually thought I would be *cough* one of the first few voted *cough* off."

"Just goes to show how sometimes we're completely wrong about our own abilities, and in as good way." Chirped Eleanor cheerfully as she drank some orange juice. "Just one more day of the competition and one of us is going to be richer than Bill Gates!"

"Maybe not _that_ *cough* rich." Chuckled Spider.

"Well … whoever wins is still going to be very well off." Hand waved Eleanor.

"True that." Nodded Spider. "Today's challenge is the last *cough* obstacle standing between me or you and the *cough* million dollars … as it's the last challenge I assume it will be _hard_ … this *cough* will be our final trial."

"I wonder what it'll be … maybe it'll be a Pokémon battle." Mused Eleanor.

"…Maybe." Said Spider as the sun shone through the window brightly.

* * *

**Confessional: Wise words from the final two.**

**Eleanor: Woohoo! Final two! I never thought I could get this far … I guess it doesn't matter how physically strong you are as long as you have a good heart. If I could lose to anyone it'd be Spider … or Jimmy. Though I'm hoping I don't lose!**

**Spider: I never thought I'd get this** *cough*** far; never in a million years did I think that I'd** *sneeze*** get to the final two. I guess I underestimated myself quite a** *gag*** bit. Nakia's gone, Kasimar's gone … even Tabitha's** *cough*** gone. It's just me versus** *cough*** Eleanor.**

**Eleanor: I would never have gotten this far without my friends; Quana, you're like a big sister to me, the sister I never had. Barney, you were tons of fun! And Jimmy … I owe you so much but I can't think how to properly say how thankful I am. To be honest I liked almost everyone on the island … with a few exceptions of course.**

**Spider: If I said I could have made it this far on** *cough*** my own I would be a big fat liar. Barney, I couldn't have done it** *cough*** without you … and Andy, you were a big help as well. Lavender; I'm** *cough*** very sorry that it ended the way it did. Curse the coin flip. Jimmy; if** *sneeze*** only the world had more people like you. And Quana … I'm winning this for us to avenge your** *cough*** unfair elimination. I love you and I'm not shy about admitting that in front of presumably** *cough*** thousands and thousands and thousands of people.**

**Eleanor: All in all I had a wonderful time. True; I may have suffered a lot due to a sadistic sociopath and a whiny yet completely nasty host … but even with those bad things the good still outweighs the bad; you've just got to have hope.**

**Spider: I'm glad I came to this show. I've really gained** *cough*** a lot of self esteem as well as friends, a girlfriend and I feel like** *cough*** I've truly became a man … I may not legally be an adult but I sure feel** *cough*** like one.**

* * *

"Attention stupid finalists." Said Chris over the intercom. "Please report to the east of camp for your final challenge. And let me tell you, this one is going to be a nightmare! Mwahahahahaha!"

Chris laughed evilly before he farted over the intercom like he had done many times before.

"#bleep#!" Whined Chris.

"That never gets old." Giggled Eleanor as she left the mess hall.

"Chris is such an *cough* idiot." Agreed Spider as he followed Eleanor.

* * *

**Confessional: Almost as much as an idiot as one of the new contestants next season!**

**Spider: I wonder is Chris is friends with ***cough* **Terrence and Phillip from South Park.**

**Chris: Shut up! Grrrr!**

* * *

Spider and Eleanor stood next to Chris to the east of Camp Wawanakwa. A pair of bleachers had been set up; the one on the left was green with a picture of Eleanor's face on it while the one on the right was orange with a picture of Spider's face on it.

"This is it you two ugly losers; the last challenge of TDL; whichever of you two dumbasses wins this will be a million dollars richer. Try not to make it too dull ok? I really want to enjoy watching you squirm and squeal! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"So; I'm guessing that the twenty four voted off campers are going to be watching the challenge then." Said Eleanor as she glanced at the bleachers.

"Yep; just like last season." Nodded Chris. "Genius idea of mine it is."

"Err … Chris; why is there giant tower over there?" Asked Spider as he pointed a short distance away.

About a hundred yards away was a HUGE tower about 2500 ft tall with two doors blocking the two elevators.

"It's part of the challenge." Said Chris dismissively before clapping his hands together and grinning. "Anyway; before we get started with the challenge … please welcome back the twenty four campers who didn't make it this far."

At that moment a large crowd walked into the area; it was the twenty four voted off campers. Patch was eating a chocolate bar, Irene looked happy to be back with the trees, Barney was gently walking on crutches and Tabitha looked a little upset and almost _haunted_.

"Hey Spider." Cooed Quana sweetly as she approached Spider and gave him a kiss. "Miss me?"

"A lot." Replied Spider with a happy smile.

"I've missed you too; I'll be rooting for you my soon to be a millionaire little arachnid." Purred Quana sweetly.

"Can we get the attention back to me … where it belongs!" Whined Chris immaturely as always.

"Wait your turn." Said Jimmy as walked past Chris and up to Eleanor. "Hey Eleanor; I bet you're excited about being a finalist huh?"

"You bet I am Jimmy; I never would have got this far without you." Smiled Eleanor with a giggly wink.

"Think nothing of it; I just did what came natural." Blushed Jimmy modestly.

"C'mere you!" Grinned Eleanor as she hugged Jimmy tightly.

"Stop ignoring me!" Whined Chris while he stomped his foot like a toddler. "Anyway; welcome one and all for the final challenge of Total Drama Letterz. This challenge is going to test your endurance and everything that you have learnt from Total Drama Letterz so far such as eating gross food, facing your fears and humiliating yourself. This challenge is brutal! Haha."

"So … what is the *cough* challenge?" Asked Spider nervously.

"Oh; right, that. Well, as today is the last of the competition I have thus named challenge number twenty eight … The Final Trial." Said Chris dramatically.

"Kinda like the last level in the first Pikmin game then." Noted Uzuri.

"Shut up!" Barked Chris.

"Ok fatty." Shrugged Uzuri.

Chris's eye twitched.

"I'm not fat!" Screamed Chris in pure anger. "I'm a handsome stud manly hunk of a man!"

A number of campers rolled their eyes.

"Whatever you say Chris." Said Fifi without much interest.

* * *

**Confessional: Chris has gone off the slippery slope!**

**Fifi: Chris is, in my opinion, as intelligent as Billy from the Grim adventures of Billy and Mandy … I always loved that show.**

**Zita: Chris is like a real life Yosemite Sam.**

**Spider: Chris used to be really** *cough*** nasty and sometimes dreadful early on … but now I just** *cough*** feel sorry for him to be honest.**

* * *

"Now; before I explain the rules I would like each of you twenty four losers to sit on the bleachers of the finalist that you want to see the million dollars. Choose wisely because you can't swap once you've chosen." Said Chris while gesturing to the bleachers.

Barney, Andy, Quana, Hector, Xaria, Fifi, Vinnie, Uzuri, Lavender, Gary, Raven and Tabitha sat on Spiders Bleachers. Meanwhile Carlton, Zita, Jimmy, Nakia, Kasimar (reluctulently), Irene, Yessica, Wallace, Oscar, Mable, Daisy and Patch sat on Eleanor's bleachers.

"Hey; why are you sitting here?" Asked Quana to Tabitha.

"Because I want Spider to win." Replied Tabitha cautiously and looking as though her mind was elsewhere.

"I thought you hated him yaaaar." Said Barney suspiciously.

Tabitha didn't respond and just hung her head and looked at her expensive pink high heeled shoes.

* * *

**Confessional: High heel shoes are druggies! *rimshot***

**Tabitha: **(She has her head in her hands and looks a little upset and deep in thought).

**Uzuri: I'd like Spider to win; he's really nice and he actually liked my art … hardly anyone does so it meant a lot. Go Spider!**

* * *

"This is going to be an enjoyable finale." Smirked Nakia foully while wearing a new wig, one that look like her old hair do but a few inches longer.

"I thought you didn't like Spider and Eleanor." Said Zita while wondering how she had gotten stuck with sitting next to Nakia.

"I don't; but watching Spider fail and lose the million dollars in front of the entire world and disappointing his parents will be _great_ to watch." Cackled Nakia meanly.

"… At least he's got hair." Smirked Zita.

Nakia turned red in anger but said nothing.

"This is so exciting." Grinned Irene while bouncing up and down as she sat. "Even the trees are excited; I can hear them cheering … oh!"

"What is it?" Asked Yessica.

"A teenage oak tree just said he wanted to see some fern fern action! How rude!" Said Irene while crossing her arms but regaining her genki smile in a matter of seconds.

* * *

**Confessional: Plants VS Zombies!**

**Irene: It feels good to be back with the trees of Wawanakwa; they missed me and I missed them. **(Irene smiles).

**Nakia: I should be in the finals! Not those two losers!**

* * *

"If you are done talking, I'd like to continue talking about the rules." Said Chris whineyly. "This last challenge is a race. You will each be racing along two separate routes around the island, on the way you will find seven mini challenges for you to complete. For each one you complete you get a key. Don't bother coming back to camp without the keys because you'll need them to unlock the elevators of the tower. Once you've got all the keys just unlock the elevator and ride it to the top where the finish line awaits. First one to cross it wins Total Drama Letterz and the million dollars!"

"Oh; is that all?" Asked Eleanor nervously. "Seven challenges each you say?"

"Yep! And they won't be easy either! Haha!" Laughed Chris sadistically.

"What exactly are the *cough* challenges?" Asked Spider hesitantly.

"This and that." Said Chris vaguely. "One of them is drinking a large mug full of blended mystery meat that is ten months out of date while another is jumping off the thousand foot cliff. Just so you know, the path marked with green flags is for Eleanor ands the path marked with orange flags is for Spider."

"Get on with the challenge! I wanna see bloodshed!" Yelled Kasimar from his seat on Eleanor's bleachers.

"Soon Kasimar, soon." Assured Chris. "First I'd like the finalists to tell us what they would do with the money if they manage to win this last challenge. Eleanor; since you are first alphabetically you can tell us first."

"Well; I'd like to use the money to adopt one or two or a lot of animals in various animal charities. I'd also buy a lifetime membership to the local zoo and maybe be zookeeper for a day a couple of times. I'd be sure to buy a few really rare animal plushies and maybe I'd go on holiday to the Amazon … and take a few friends."

"Go Eleanor!" Cheered Jimmy as did most of the other people supporting her besides a few obvious exceptions.

"Lame! Why couldn't you buy something exciting like a tank or a collectors set of knives?" Asked Chris in angry annoyance.

"Err … I'm _twelve _dumbass." Reminded Eleanor.

"Whatever; so Spider, I expect little … but what would you spend your winnings on if you win the million?" Asked Chris dully.

"Good question; well, I'd *cough* like to firstly use the money to help afford surgery *cough* so I'm not so ill anymore. The waiting list may be long but at least I'd *cough* be _on_ the list right? After that I'd probably help use it to afford college, go on a nice long vacation and go to medical school."

"Wait; you want to go to _medical school_?" Asked Chris in utter disbelief. "You do realize how ridiculous that sounds right?"

"It's what I'd like to *cough* do." Said Spider earnestly.

"I think it's a very sweet idea." Smiled Quana.

"True." Agreed Andy.

"And it'll happen if Spider can win this last challenge." Chirped Raven sweetly.

"Well … looks like the money is going to be wasted no matter who wins … not much I can do about that sadly." Muttered Chris in whiny annoyance. "Anyway; finalists; to your starting lines, let's get this show on the road already!"

"Good luck Spider." Said Eleanor as she and Spider shook hands.

"May the better person win." Smiled Spider.

* * *

**Confessional: This is it … the final challenge of Total Drama Letterz…**

**Eleanor: Win or lose, I have just one hope … that Chris loses money on the inevitable bet he placed.**

**Fifi: Part of me wishes I was still in the competition and in the finals … but another part of me is glad I don't have to take art in a presumably dangerous challenge.**

**Xaria: I really hope that Spider wins; he deserves the money so that he finally be cured of his illness … plus I've got a five dollar bet on him winning. Not exactly high stakes but I still want to win the bet anyway.**

**Yessica: I'm on Team Eleanor!**

**Wallace: … Game on!**

* * *

Spider and Eleanor readied themselves at their individual starting lines and awaiting Chris's announcement to start the race.

"Just remember; if you die then you lose by default … so be careful! Haha!" Taunted Chris as he took out a starter pistol and inserted a blank round. "Remember; this challenge is for keeps … all or nothing!"

"Start the damn challenge!" Yelled Lavender.

Chris frowned.

"Fine! On your marks…"

Spider felt a feeling of excitement and nervousness full within him.

"Get set…"

Eleanor grinned in extreme glee as she readied herself.

BANG!

"Go!" Yelled Chris as he pulled the trigger on his starter pistol.

Spider and Eleanor took off from the starting lines and began the final challenge; Jimmy quickly ran after Eleanor. Likewise, Quana ran after Spider.

"I forgot to mention that one person is allowed to help out each finalist … but it looks like the helpers have already volunteered … meh." Shrugged Chris. "I'm gonna get a latté; I'll be back later … so, yeah."

Chris left to his personal undeservedly luxurious trailer while the twenty two campers seated on the bleachers looked amongst each other.

"Mwahahahahaha! This is going to be an exciting, and dare I say _evil_, finale!" Cackled Wallace evilly.

"Why exactly … you didn't." Said Oscar with a groan.

"Did what?" Asked Wallace.

"You know what."

"I won't if you don't say."

"I thought you wanted Eleanor to win."

"I do; I'm sitting in her bleachers aren't I?" Smirked Wallace, eyes twinkling behind his new sunglasses. "But why compete if not to cheat?"

"You aren't even competing!" Groaned Mable in exasperation.

"I know; but I just thought I'd put a few tricks and traps here and there along the course." Cackled Wallace.

"Will anyone get seriously hurt?" Asked Vinnie from Spider's bleachers.

"Nobody will die." Promised Wallace.

"That's … mildly reassuring." Muttered Vinnie.

* * *

**Confessional: Mild as toothpaste! *rimshot***

**Vinnie: I sometimes what goes on in Wallace's insane mind … then I get up and walk around until the feeling goes away.**

**Wallace: Evil never truly dies, even after elimination! Mwahahahahahahaha!**

* * *

Eleanor ran as fast as she could down her designated course; as her route was on the opposite side to the island's that Spider's was on she had no way of knowing if she was in first place or not.

"Gotta keep running! Won't win if I'm slow!" Said Eleanor to encourage herself.

"Wait up Eleanor!" Called Jimmy as he ran up towards Eleanor as fast as his legs could carry him.

"Hey Jimmy; isn't this incredible. I'm participating in the final challenge of the season!" Grinned Eleanor as she and her boyfriend ran along.

"And I'm going to be helping you." Smiled Jimmy.

"Is that allowed?" Asked Eleanor.

"Chris hasn't stopped me." Shrugged Jimmy. "Hey look; I can see the first challenge up ahead!"

"Yeah; I think the huge sign with the '#1' on it is a bit of a giveaway." Giggled Eleanor as they ran up to the sign where Chef Hatchet was standing.

"Ok ferret girl; time for your first challenge." Said Chef as he took out a card and began to read from it. "You must fire an arrow at that target over there hanging in the tree."

Chef pointed to a nearby tree which had a target hanging down from it.

"Just hit the arrow in that and you may continue on your way." Stated Chef.

"Do I need to get a Bullseye?" Asked Eleanor while hoping to get the negative response.

"No; hit it anywhere as long as it doesn't miss." Shrugged Chef as he handed Eleanor a bow and a quiver of arrows.

"Err … I'll give it a go." Murmured Eleanor as she took an arrow out of the quiver and notched it.

"Just focus Eleanor, be the arrow, beeeeeee the arrow." Said Jimmy to cheer Eleanor on.

Eleanor carefully aimed and then released her hold on the strong of the bow; the arrow soared towards the target and hit it, though not in the Bullseye.

"Alright!" Cheered Eleanor.

"You little ripper!" Cheered Jimmy.

"What does that mean?" Asked Eleanor.

"I don't actually know; I learnt the phrase in a YouTube comment." Explained Jimmy. "Now let's get running; Spider might be pulling ahead!"

"Good idea." Agreed Eleanor as Chef Hatchet handed her one of her seven keys. She dropped the bow and quiver of arrows and along with Jimmy she continued the race.

* * *

**Confessional: Not quite a Bullseye but still a good shot.**

**Eleanor: That wasn't such a hard challenge; maybe the rest of the race won't be so bad!**

**Jimmy: One challenge down; six to go before Eleanor is crowned the champion!**

**Daisy: This isn't fair! I should be in the finals! I'm better than anyone else here! **(Daisy scowls).

**Chris: That was rather anticlimactic; I was hoping she'd barley pass with her last arrow. I should have the target smaller shouldn't I?** (Chris grumbles to himself).

* * *

Spider and Quana were running down Spider's marked path at a constant speedy pace. Spider was lightly gasping as he wasn't exactly the best at long distance running.

"Keep it up Spider! You're doing fine." Said Quana supportively.

"This would be so much *cough* easier if I wasn't so *cough* unwell!" Wheezed Spider as he ran alongside Quana as fast as he could go. "I appreciate your *cough* help my lovely."

"What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn't help you become a million dollars richer?" Smiled Quana soothingly. "First challenge dead ahead!"

Up ahead was a large sign with a #1 on it. As they ran closer they saw an intern standing by it holding a piece of card.

"So far so good Spider." Said the intern. "It's time for your first challenge in The Final Trial."

"What do I have to *sneeze* do?" Asked Spider.

"Get the lid off this jar of pickles that Chef found in his kitchen." Said the intern as he passed Spider a jar labeled 'Townsville Pickles'.

"I'll try." Said Spider as he began trying to tug the lid off the jar while unscrewing it at the same time.

It didn't budge.

"Come on; come *cough* on." Said Spider through gritted teeth as he summoned his strength though was still unable to get the lid off.

"Here; let me help." Said Quana as she gripped hold of the lid of the jar as well and tugged and twisted it. They used all their strength for about five full seconds.

POP!

The lid flew off and the jar was open.

"Good job Spider." Complimented Quana.

"Well you helped." Reminded Spider as the intern gave him his first key. "Now onto *cough* the next challenge; we've not out of this *cough* yet!"

Spider and Quana began to run again as fast as they could so as to makeup for lost time though Spider was still tired from getting the resilient lid off the pickle jar.

"Quana; I feel tired *cough* already; I need to catch my breath." Panted Spider.

Quana tried to quickly think of a way to get Spider to keep going fast; she quickly thought of a very good idea.

"Tell you what; if you win this challenge … then I'll let you see my boobs." Purred Quana with a wink.

Spider was off like a rocket.

**Confessional: … Hahahahaha!**

**Spider: Quana was probably joking; but ***cough* **I'm not gonna lose. I intend to share the** *cough*** prize with her if I win.**

**Quana: Who says I was joking? **(She wiggles her eyebrows naughtily).

C**hef: Those two have strength! Even I couldn't get the lid off that damn pickle jar!**

* * *

Back at the starting line the other twenty two campers were sitting around wondering how the finalists were doing.

"This is boring!" Whined Nakia.

"Deal with it." Muttered Zita.

"I wonder who's in first." Asked Carlton out loud.

"Sadly we don't know." Said Fifi as she tapped her fingers on the bleachers she sat on.

"I know one thing; whoever wins, fans are going to lose." Said Mable as she looked up at the clouds. "Oh look; a cloud shaped like a duck."

"I think it looks more like an albatross." Said Xaria opinionatedly.

"More like a pigeon." Said Lavender.

"I'd say a parrot yaaar." Said Barney as he put his arm around Lavender which made her smile.

"You're all wrong; it's clearly a chicken." Chuckled Gary.

"Shut up! All of you!" Snapped Daisy. "I can't hear myself think because of you idiots!"

Wallace reached into his inner pocket on his leather jacket and took out the Jellyinator and blasted Daisy with blue jelly.

"My cloths!" Screamed Daisy. "I'll tell on you!"

"Thanks; that'll boost my notoriety." Smirked Wallace.

* * *

**Confessional: A tattle tale goes to jail; stick your head in the garbage pail.**

**Wallace: Ruining people's cloths is so evil! Mwahahahahahaha!**

**Hector: Wallace may be nuts … but he's quite possibly the smartest person I've ever met. If only he weren't so 'evil#, the world would really benefit.**

**Vinnie: This is gonna be a loooooong day.**

* * *

The final challenge has begun; it's Spider vs Eleanor. Tune in next time to find out who is the winner of Total Drama Letterz and the million dollar prize. And let me tell you; the next chapter is going to be both funny and possibly surprising. Who are you all rooting for?


	62. Day 28, Part 2, The Final Trial

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Action or the Season That Must Never Be Named. They all belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his great story Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all twenty eight OC's in this story so please do not steal them.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains shattering testicles, kissing, a cliff dive, vomit, funny and shocking moments and a dramatic finale. Nothing M rated though nor will it ever be.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria**

**Note: **And here we are … the chapter where the champion will be crowned and awarded one million dollars! TDL has come a very long way since the beginning and I have everyone who has ever read the story to thank for that. Now place your final bets and read on to see who is the winner!

Winner on the horizon!

* * *

Eleanor ran down the marked path with Jimmy right behind her; they were making good time in the final challenge so far. Currently they were running through the forest and were nearing the second mini challenge.

"You're doing great Eleanor." Said Jimmy supportively. "I bet Spider is way behind … not that I want him to lose, but I just want you to win more."

"I know what you mean; don't worry." Smiled Eleanor as she and Jimmy ran up to Chef Hatchet.

"Your second challenge is to pick a present." Said Chef as he gestured to a table next to him that had two colorful boxes on it. "One has the key you need; the other has a nasty surprise. Choose wisely."

"What's the trick?" Gulped Eleanor.

"Chris didn't tell me." Stated Chef Hatchet.

"I'll do this; I don't want a pretty hair on your cute head getting hurt." Smiled Jimmy as he approached the boxes. "They say the left is best in politics so I'll open the left box."

Jimmy quickly opened the left box and…

BAM!

A boxing glove on a spring punched him in the face; Jimmy staggered as he opened the other box and took out the key.

"Two challenges down … five to go." Groaned Jimmy though managing to muster a smile.

"Are you ok?" Asked Eleanor in concern as Jimmy handed her the key.

"Peachy." Replied Jimmy with a groan. "Now come on! Your fortune's waiting!"

* * *

**Confessional: Punch out!**

**Jimmy: Did it hurt? A lot. Was it worth helping Eleanor win? Absolutely!**

**Eleanor: That was very brave of Jimmy indeed.**

**Chris: Haha! He got punched in the face! Priceless! Seeing kids in extreme pain give me a warm fuzzy inside.**

* * *

Spider was running with Quana as fast as he could … and it wasn't because of the promise of second base if he won. He was giving this challenge his all and he wasn't going to let the million dollars pass him by!

"Here we are Spider; second challenge." Grinned Quana as they ran up to a sigh with a large number two painted on it. The intern from earlier was standing next to it.

"Ok Spider; your second challenge is to … kiss the person helping you like you mean it." Said the intern while raising an eyebrow at the challenge.

"Sounds good to *cough* me." Smiled Spider.

"So; like we mean it you say?" Asked Quana.

"Yep … I wonder why Chris thought you'd have trouble with this." Pondered the intern in puzzlement.

Spider and Quana weren't listening; they were already kissing each other with gusto as the challenge required them too … and this was one challenge they were both enjoying.

* * *

**Confessional: Wishy washy kissy mossy!**

**Spider: Quana's lips kinda taste like peaches … I wonder why.**

**Quana: If only there were more challenges like that one! **(Quana giggles and swoons).

**Chris: I was hoping a guy would have been helping Spider that would have humiliated him. Why didn't it work? Grrrr!**

**Kasimar: Happy people make me sick.**

* * *

"Ok; you two pass." Said the intern after about half a minute.

Spider and Quana parted looked flushed.

"Maybe this challenge won't be so bad after *cough* all." Smiled Spider optimistically as the intern handed him a key.

"You said it cutie." Grinned Quana as she and Spider took off running again.

* * *

**Confessional: Cutie pa-tootie!**

**Barney: Yaaaar! It does me proud to see me match making skills have well and truly succeeded! Yo ho!**

* * *

Jimmy and Eleanor were running alongside a stream within the forest on Wawanakwa Island. Jimmy had recovered from the punch he had received and now they were running at full speed again.

"This is nice, isn't it Jimmy." Said Eleanor as she and Jimmy ran along. "A nice jog in the woods on such a sunny day; great conditions for the final challenge I say!"

"You said it Eleanor; its days like this that come once, maybe twice in a lifetime … according to SpongeBob anyway." Joked Jimmy.

"Oh yeah; I remember that episode, wasn't it the one with the butterfly?" Remembered Eleanor.

"The very one; oh look, it's the third challenge." Said Jimmy as he pointed up ahead to a sign with a large black number three messily painted on it that Chef Hatchet was standing beside.

"Hey; how did you get here so fast?" Asked Eleanor in puzzlement as she and Jimmy approached Chef.

"I was off screen." Said Chef simply as though it were as plain as day. "Anyway; your next challenge is to get an injection."

"What?" Gulped Eleanor. "I already did that back on day five!"

"That's probably why Chris wants you to do it again I guess." Said Chef as he took out a needle syringe filled with water. "Hold out your arm so we can start."

"Can you hold my hand Jimmy?" Requested Eleanor as she rolled up her right sleeve.

"My pleasure." Smiled Jimmy as he gently took hold of Eleanor's left hand and gave it a squeeze.

"Ok; this'll only hurt for a moment." Said Chef as he lined the needle up and injected Eleanor.

"OWWWWW!" Yelped Eleanor in pain. "That was horrible!"

"I don't pick the challenges." Said Chef Hatchet as he handed Eleanor her third key.

"I could kiss it better if you want." Offered Jimmy.

"I think I'll be ok." Smiled Eleanor. "Now on to the next challenge!"

* * *

**Confessional: Who here isn't afraid of needles?**

**Eleanor:** (She is gingerly rubbing her arm).** That's gonna be stinging later…**

**Xaria: I heard a loud yelp from the bleachers; if I didn't know better I'd say Eleanor received an injection as part of her challenge.**

**Chris: Eleanor sucks! Haha!**

* * *

Spider and Quana had reached Spider's third challenge; they were now at the top of the thousands foot cliff and it was looking pretty obvious as to what they would have to do…

"Your third challenge of the Final Trial is to jump off the thousand foot cliff and into the water below." Read the intern off a card.

"What about the *cough* sharks?" Gulped Spider nervously.

"I think they're getting facials at the Playa Des Losers." Stated the intern.

"Why would a shark need a facial?" Asked Quana out loud in confusion. "In fact; it probably doesn't matter anyway. Ready to jump Spider?"

"I'm n-not sure if I *cough* can d-do this." Gulped Spider as he peered over the edge of the cliff.

"Don't worry Spider; I'll jump with you." Assured Quana. "Let's do it on three, ok?"

"… I guess I have no *cough* choice." Mumbled Spider as he prepared himself while Quana joined hands with him.

"One…"

"Two…"

"Three!" Yelled Quana as she and Spider jumped over the cliff.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Screamed Spider as he and his girlfriend fell down and down and down to the water below.

Splash!

Spider and Quana quickly surfaced and swam towards the shore; true to the interns word the sharks were nowhere to be seen.

Spider stood up and coughed out some water while Quana wrung out part of her shirt.

"Well that wasn't so bad." Said Quana cheerfully as she picked a key up off the sand. "A real adrenalin rush right?"

Spider only stammered ineligibly due to Quana's wet shirt hugging against her chest; Quana snapped her fingers in front of his face to get his attention.

"Hey! Spider! Stop getting distracted by the sexy and get moving! We've still got more challenges to do you know." Smirked Quana playfully.

"Oh! Right … sorry about that." Apologized Spider.

"Don't worry about it." Shrugged Quana while still smiling. "Anyway; I've got the key so let's go!"

* * *

**Confessional: Charge! Strike the enemy with a full frontal assault!**

**Spider: **He is knocking at his head). **Get your head out of the gutter Spider!**

**Quana: **(She looks amused). **Boys…**

**Irene: You ever get the feeling you've missed something really funny and sexy? … Nah; probably nothing. Now to go hug some trees!**

**Chris: Why do the sharks need facials? I wanted them to tear Spider and Quana to pieces!** (Chris crosses his arms and pouts immaturely).

**Chef: Chris does realize he'd be sued if that happened right?**

**Uzuri: Did you know that blood makes sharks go into a feeding frenzy? People have lost limbs because of that.**

* * *

"Is your arm feeling better Eleanor?" Asked Jimmy in concern as he and her sped along.

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Assured Eleanor. "I think we're gonna take first place, and look, there's challenge number four!"

Jimmy and Eleanor ran up to Chef Hatchet who was standing next to a sign with a large messily painted number four on it. As they ran up Chef took out a cue card.

"Ok; for your next challenge you have to get from the white line to the yellow line without touching the ground; if you touch the ground you have to try again until you complete the challenge." Said Chef.

"How am I supposed to do that?" Asked Eleanor. "I'd climb the trees but I might fall as they look kind of hard to climb up."

"Hmm … got it!" Said Jimmy with a snap of his fingers. "The challenge doesn't say anything about me not being allowed to touch the ground; I could carry you on my shoulders if you like."

"You sure you're strong enough to carry me?" Asked Eleanor.

"You aren't fat Eleanor; you're trim and in good shape, the opposite of Caesar Barber." Assured Jimmy politely.

"Who's he?" Asked Eleanor curiously.

"A guy who tried to sue Macdonald's because it made him fat." Explained Jimmy as he knelled down to Eleanor could get on his shoulders. "And away we go!"

Jimmy carried Eleanor on his shoulders without difficulty past the white line and over to the yellow line in about fifteen seconds. As Jimmy kneeled so Eleanor could get off Chef Hatchet walked up and handed them a key.

"Good job thinking outside the box; I'll meet you at your next challenge checkpoint." Said Chef as he walked off.

"Four challenges down and only three to go; were doing great!" Cheered Eleanor as she hugged Jimmy. "I just hope the next challenge isn't too bad."

"I wouldn't worry about it; worrying never solves anything; besides, I think we can overcome any obstacle through teamwork." Said Jimmy optimistically.

* * *

**Confessional: Team Work! Man; that's a terrible team name isn't it?**

**Eleanor: Jimmy's optimism is just one of the reasons I like him. **(Eleanor smiles cutely).

**Oscar: I haven't heard any explosions or screams … so I guess that Wallace's traps haven't been triggered yet. That guy is just plain nuts!**

**Wallace: Mwahahahahaha!**

* * *

Spider and Quana ran along the beach of Wawanakwa island and were nearing their fourth challenge. Just as they were approaching the next challenge, there was a sudden…

BOOM!

Spider was thrown upwards and landed on his back in the sand.

"What the heck was *cough* that?" Asked Spider as he painfully got to his feet.

"Oh no." Groaned Quana as she pointed to a sign next to them

The sign said, 'Danger, land mines, property of The Wallace'.

"Would it _kill_ wallace to play fair?" Asked Quana incredulously.

"We'll have to get through *cough* them somehow." Said Spider uncertainly.

"Why don't we just go around them through the water?" Suggested Quana.

* * *

**Confessional: Simple solutions to complicated problems.**

**Spider: Good thinking Quana; that** *cough*** saved us some time.**

**Wallace: Curses! They were supposed to be blown up! Well; I had to give them a chance though the solution shouldn't have been so easy to figure out.**

* * *

After easily getting past the mine field Spider and Quana ran up to the intern who had been giving them the challenges.

"Your fourth challenge is to destroy this sandcastle." Said the intern as he gestured to a decent looking sandcastle.

"That's it?" Asked Spider suspiciously.

"Yeah, really … it's a stupid challenge I know." Said the intern.

Spider shrugged as he stomped on the sandcastle and knocked it down in just a few mere seconds.

"You pass." Said the intern as he handed Spider his fourth key.

* * *

**Confessional: Sandcastle hassle!**

**Spider: That was unusually** *cough*** easy … what made Chris think that would** *cough*** be even a remotely hard challenge?**

**Chris: I made it as more of a tribute to my beach bully days when I used to kick down kids sandcastles all the time and relish in their tears. Good times, good times…**

**Xaria: I hate Chris.**

* * *

"Your fifth challenge is to climb up that flagpole and retrieve the flag." Said Chef Hatchet to Jimmy and Eleanor. "Not such a hard challenge; just a ten meter flagpole, nothing special."

"Can you give me a boost?" Asked Eleanor to Jimmy.

"Sure." Said Jimmy as he and Eleanor approached the base of the flagpole.

Jimmy knelt down and put his hands together to give Eleanor a leg up as she began to climb the flagpole.

"Just don't look down when you reach the top." Called Jimmy when Eleanor began to get near the flag.

Eleanor automatically looked down and gulped.

"I looked down!" Wailed Eleanor as she attempted to garb the flag. "How on earth did Owen and Gwen manage to do this in the final challenge last season?"

* * *

**Confessional: They had it easier since they were teenagers.**

**Eleanor: **(She is holding five keys in one hand). **I got the flag eventually; though I nearly fell a couple of times … I **_**never**_** want to climb a flagpole again … **_**ever**_**!**

**Jimmy: Why is it when people are told to not look down they do anyway? I see it on TV all the time.**

**Kasimar: I hope somebody breaks their neck.**

**Fifi: I wonder who is winning at the moment; it's kinda a shame that only one person was allowed to help each finalist as I would have liked to help Eleanor.**

* * *

"Your next mini challenge is to score ten on this paddleball." Said the intern as he handed Spider a paddleball.

"Man; those things are tricky." Said Quana as she looked at the paddleball. "Do you think you can do it Spider?"

"Positive; I'm pretty good *cough* with one of these." Said Spider with a smile as he began to easily hit the ball against the paddle. "I wonder if I can beat my record of seven hundred and thirty four."

"No time; you've done ten so let's get moving!" Urged Quana as the intern handed her the key.

"Oh, right, force of habit." Chuckled Spider as he dropped the paddleball and continued running down the designated course with Quana running right beside him.

* * *

**Confessional: Paddle that ball!**

**Chris: That challenge was supposed to be nigh impossible! I mean, if I can't even get it once how in the world would Spider be able to?**

**Xaria: Chris's ego is bigger than the population of China.**

**Gary: I don't know why … but I have a sudden craving for raspberry cake.**

* * *

"Five challenges done; only two more and you'll be a millionaire!" Cheered Jimmy in excitement as she and Eleanor ran down the remainder of the course and came across Chef Hatchet again.

Next to Chef Hatchet was a large sign with a number six painted on it and a table with a large mug of blended mystery meat on it.

"This challenge might be a hard one." Said Chef. "You have to drink the contents of this mug; a blended puree of mystery meat to be exact."

"What does it taste like dare I ask?" Asked Eleanor hesitantly.

"Like crap." Said Chef flatly yet also honestly.

"…Fore a million dollars." Said Eleanor as she picked up the mug and quickly chugged the horrible drink down in five big gulps.

After the drink was finished Eleanor gagged and ran over to a bush to be sick.

"Blech!" Vomited Eleanor in disgust. "My tummy feels icky!"

* * *

**Confessional: Icky bicky!**

**Jimmy: Eleanor may have been sick but she passed the challenge and Chef gave her the key; only one more to go!**

**Chris: **(He is laughing horribly).

* * *

"I can't go on *cough* much longer!" Wheezed Spider as he was tired from all the constant running. "I need a *cough* doctor!"

"You're doing sensational Spider! You can still win this!" Encouraged Quana supportively. "Look; here's the sixth challenge."

Spider wearily ran up to the intern with Quana following. As Spider caught his breath the intern read Spider's sixth challenge off a cue card.

"Eat an apple." Said the intern as he held up a ripe shiny bright red apple.

"I can't; I'm really *cough* allergic to them." Said Spider. "What am I gonna do *cough* now?"

"No worries; I love apples." Smiled Quana as she quickly ate the apple. "Mmm; crunchy. C'mon Spider! Just one more challenge to go!"

"Let's hurry!" Declared Spider as the intern handed him a key.

Spider and Quana took off running towards Spider's final challenge … one that absolutely nobody was going to enjoy…

* * *

**Confessional: I'm just bobbing for apples even though it's not Halloween.**

**Chris: Dammit! Spider was supposed to have an allergy attack and suffer1 That stupid #bleep# little Hispanic #bleep#! ARGH!**

**Spider: My boyfriend senses** *cough*** are tingling.**

* * *

The twenty two campers not taking part in the challenge were sitting on the bleachers awaiting the return of the finalists.

"How much longer is this going to take?" Asked Lavender while sitting comfortably on Barney's lap. "I hope Spider and Eleanor are ok."

"I hope not; I personally hope they were gutted by the bear." Smirked Kasimar.

BAM!

"Ow!" Wailed Kasimar wimpily.

Irene punched Kasimar in the gut which knocked the wind out of him.

"Shut up you logging developer!" Growled Irene.

"Nice right hook." Complimented Yessica. "But how is calling him a logging developer an insult?"

"Because loggers cut down trees and developers destroy nature of course." Explained Irene.

"Look me hearties!" Exclaimed Barney suddenly. "I can see Spider and Eleanor!"

Everyone was immediately at attention and looked around; they all quickly spotted the two finalists running back down their marked paths towards the bleachers.

"Go Spider yaaar!" Cheered Barney.

"Come no Eleanor; I hate you but I hate Spider far more!" Yelled Nakia.

In a few moments Spider and Eleanor had ran back into camp and stood by the bleachers.

"Where's the final mini *cough* challenge?" Asked Spider. "I didn't come across it at *cough*all."

"Me neither." Said Eleanor.

"Ah; Eleanor and Spider, right on time." Grinned Chris as he strolled up to them holding two keys. "I can answer your question; I'm going to be giving you your final challenges … and it is one and the same for each of you. Jimmy, Quana, you two may take a seat on the bleachers; you may help your chosen finalists no longer."

"Good luck Spider." Encouraged Quana.

"Go for it Eleanor." Smiled Jimmy.

As they sat down Chris took out a cue card and began to read off it.

"In order to get the last key you have to do an incredibly hard thing … you must suck up to me!" Smirked Chris narcissistically.

* * *

**Confessional: … Well this sucks.**

**Carlton: This is the worst…**

**Irene: Stupidest…**

**Hector: Dumbest…**

**Mable: Lamest…**

**Raven: Silliest…**

**Lavender: Most awful idea for a challenge I have ever heard of!**

* * *

"You may begin sucking up … now." Said Chris as he awaited what Spider and Eleanor would say.

" … You have magnificent hair." Said Spider.

"You are our reason to live." Said Eleanor.

"Any women would want to have your children." Said Spider reluctulently.

"You are awesome." Said Eleanor while really not wanting too.

"Ah! Such wonderful words; especially because all of those things are true!" Haha!" Bragged Chris with a foul arrogant smirk. "Here are your keys; first person to cross the finish line at the top of the tower is the winner of Total Drama Letterz."

With all seven keys that each needed Spider and Eleanor ran to the tower and began using the keys to open the locks to their respective elevators; while their supporters cheered for them they began unlocking the doors in front of the elevators.

Both of them managed to open he last fop the locks at roughly the same time and quickly ran into the elevators and activated them. As the doors closed it was clear Eleanor has a very small lead as her doors closed first.

As the elevators very quickly shot up towards the top of the tower Chris took out a remote and pressed the big red button.

Instantly the ground in front of the tower parted to reveal a pool of water a couple of meters deep and a finish line rose up in front of it.

"What are you doing Chris?" Asked Oscar.

"I lied about the finish line being at the top of the tower." Smirked Chris. "The final part of the challenge is jumping off the top of falling two and a half thousand feet into this pool and then crossing the line. Pretty smart huh?"

"This is so dangerous!" Exclaimed Quana. "They could get hurt!"

"It's their fault for thinking I was telling the truth." Smirked Chris.

* * *

**Confessional: Sometimes you've got to take a dive to reach the top.**

**Raven: Is Chris mad or something?**

**Vinnie: I have a bad feeling about this.**

**Quana: If Spider or Eleanor get hurt I'm not gonna hold back on Chris.**

* * *

At the top of the tower the doors to the elevators opened; Eleanor ran out of hers closely followed by Spider from his; they ran to the edge but there was no finish line in sight.

"Huh? Where's the finish line?" Asked Eleanor in confusion. "I don't see it anywhere."

"Me neither." Agreed Spider.

Suddenly the intercom next to them crackled into life.

"Attention Eleanor and Spider; I told a porky pete! The finish line isn't really up there … it's back no the ground! Haha! Anyway; to reach it you have to jump off the tower, fall two thousand five hundred feet and land in a pool of water. This is the final obstacle standing between one of you and a million dollars. Try not to die! Haha!"

Eleanor and Spider peered over the edge and felt the feeling in their legs leave them; it was an absolutely huge drop to the bottom; there was a pretty good chance they would miss the pool and end up splattered on the ground.

"I can't do this." Whimpered Eleanor in fear. "It's too far down."

"I agree; there is no way I'm making this jump; one thousand feet is bad enough but two thousand five hundred is just plain ridiculous!" Gulped Spider as his knees began to knock.

"Hurry up and jump! I haven't got all day." Whined Chris over the intercom.

"How about we call it a draw and take whatever substitute challenge Chris comes up with?" Suggested Spider.

"Definitely; it'd be suicide to jump." Agreed Eleanor.

Chris grew impatient and took out an air horn attached to a megaphone; he put in front of the intercom microphone he was holding and pressed the on button.

HOOOOOOOONK!

Spider and Eleanor screamed in panic at the loud noise and jump about ten feet in the air; Eleanor landed on her back near the elevators … but Spider actually fell right off the platform and began to fall down towards the pool far below.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGH!" Screamed Spider as he free fell down and down and down.

"_**SPIDER**_!" Screamed Quana in horror.

"Me Heartie!" Yelled Barney in terror for his friend

Spider quickly fell the rest of the way and landed with a painful splash in the pool … he didn't surface.

"Hmm; looks like Spider's dead." Said Chris without the slightest little bit of concern or care. "I guess Eleanor wins!"

"You monster!" Screamed Quana. "You #censored to the power of infinity#."

Quana ran at Chris to attack him but Chris simply _punched her_ to the ground and sneered.

"Aww! Is da wittle singer feewing sad?" Said Chris mockingly.

Before anything else could happen the sound of a gasp was heard; Spider surfaced from the pool, coughed a few times and managed to drag himself over the finish line.

"*Cough* Ow *cough* that hurt." Groaned Spider as he staggered to his feet; he then noticed Quana looking a little pained on the floor and saw Chris standing over her. Spider narrowed his eyes.

"You've gone too far *cough* this time Chris!" Growled Spider as he marched up to Chris.

KNEE OF JUSTICE!

DOUBLE POP!

Spider kneed Chris in the balls and two pops were heard; Chris screamed in pain and collapsed to the ground in pure excruciating agony.

Spider took a few deep breaths and then blinked.

"What just *cough* happened?" He asked.

A second of silence passed before everyone _**exploded**_ into applause; everyone on Spider's side cheered and even those on Eleanor's side besides Nakia, Daisy and Kasimar applauded as well. Spider suddenly realized what had happened and a modest yet truly happy smile spread across his face.

He had won Total Drama Letterz.

Spider felt a pair of tanned arms embrace him and a second later felt somebody's lips press against his for a passionate kiss. It was Quana and she was positively beaming.

"You did it Spider!" Cheered Quana in joy. "You're rich! Woohoo for you!"

"I couldn't have *cough* done it without you." Said Spider modestly while blushing at the applause he was receiving.

* * *

**Confessional: Spider is the winner of Total Drama Letterz! Give him a round of applause!**

**Spider: I did it! I won! I ***cough*** never thought this would happen … I ***cough* **nobody can predict the future. How glad I am that ***cough*** I've persisted in this competition without losing hope. I think most** *sneeze*** of us can leave happy and without any** *cough*** regrets.**

**Nakia: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! How can this be? This isn't fair!**

**Barney: Yaaaar! Good job me heartie!**

**Carlton: That fall looked absolutely terrifying … Spider is a braver man than me.**

* * *

Eleanor exited the elevator of the tower; she had heard the applause through the intercom and knew that she had lost … but in actual fact she didn't feel so bad at all. She'd done pretty darn well after all!

Jimmy walked up to Eleanor and gave her a tight hug which Eleanor returned.

"You did you best Eleanor; that's good enough for me and is all anybody could ever ask of you." Smiled Jimmy.

Eleanor smiled at Jimmy and gave him a sweet kiss on the lips.

"Thanks Jimmy; you are a _true_ friend." Said Eleanor with a kind smile.

* * *

**Confessional: Eleanor may not have won … but she still deserves a cheer!**

**Eleanor: I may not have won … but I still feel like I can call this whole experience a victory. I gotta go tell Frost and Dandelion!**

**Chris: Waaaaaaah! My balls! Boohoohoo!**

* * *

Later that night all twenty six campers were gathered around the Bonfire Pit; some sat on stumps and logs while others simply stood. Chris stood at the front with spider and had an ice pack sellotaped to his crotch. He managed to force a smile and began to speak.

"It's been a long four weeks of alphabetical disorder … there have been hook ups, heartbreaks, injury's, puking and a whole lot more pain … but after twenty eight days I can give to you he winner, of Total Drama letterz … Spider Lesley Garnet!"

"Please don't mention the *cough * Lesley part." Groaned Spider. "But what can I say; just like *cough* Owen last season … I feel awesome! I _really_ never thought I'd be *cough* the one to end up winning."

"I like pie." Said Patch dumbly.

"Anyway; I'm still in shock over *cough* winning … it's a very nice feeling." Smiled Spider while blushing modestly as everyone applauded.

"You earned it my little arachnid." Smiled Quana.

"There's gonna be a party at the Playa Des Losers; let's go me hearties! Yaaaar!" Declared Barney.

"Alright; a party!" Cheered Jimmy.

As the twenty six campers began to leave for the luxury boat that would take them to the Playa Des losers Chris turned to the camera and began to let out tears.

"Spider doesn't deserve to win! He popped my testicles! Boohoohoo! But Spider is our winner and is now a million dollars richer. And that's it really. I guess I'll see you next season because this has been Total Drama Letterz."

Chris dropped to his knees and began crying while the contestants began to sail away from Wawanakwa Island while an eagle silhouette flew past the moon.

* * *

And Spider is the winner of Total Drama Letterz! After all he's been through I think he has more than earned it right? Sorry to Eleanor's fans but I always planned for her to be the runner up. Don't feel too bad as she still has Jimmy as her boyfriend.

So … yeah; Spider is the champion of Total Drama Letterz and is gonna eventually go to medical school. Who saw that coming?

Don't go away though! The story isn't over just yet; one chapter still remains and there are a number of big surprises in it. I'll just say one thing … Chris fans beware!

Winner: Spider

Runner Up: Eleanor


	63. Total Ousted Alphabet 7

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Total Drama Island, Alphabet or the season that must never be named; they belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. I also do not own the alphabet theme; that belongs to Frank15 and his masterpiece fanfic Total Drama Alphabet. I do however own all 30 (not a typo) OC's that appear in this story so please do not steal them. Thank you.

**The Warning: **This chapter contains a bully, blue jelly, something unexpected, kissing, implied second base and the humiliation conga to end all humiliation congas! Nothing M rated though just like it has never been in the whole story.

**Pairings: SpiderxQuana BarneyxLavender JimmyxEleanor AndyxMable GaryxRaven VinniexUzuri OscarxXaria.**

**Note: **Here it is … the final chapter of Total Drama Letterz that will wrap up the remaining things yet to be wrapped up. Some things will carry over to the sequel though. I have had a wonderful time writing this story and have made a fair few great friends in the process. But all good things must comer to an end. This chapter will start the ball moving for the sequel (which will feature 26 NEW characters) as well as giving a few surprises. For now; enjoy the last chapter of Total Drama Letterz!

It's not goodbye, it's merely farewell.

* * *

The bright stage lights shone down on the stage of Total Ousted Alphabet. Eddie and Sasha were sitting in their armchairs waiting for the signal to be given to start the show. On the high rise sofa on the bottom row from left to right were Patch, Quana, Barney, Lavender, Irene, Yessica, Uzuri and Vinnie. From left to right on the middle row were Oscar, Xaria, Mable, Andy, Jimmy, Zita, Kasimar and Hector. Sitting on the top row from left to right were Daisy, Wallace, Nakia, Gary, Raven and Tabitha who looked a bit depressed. Also on the stage was Chris who looked rather annoyed.

"When is the stupid episode going to begin?" Whined Chris. "I hate waiting! I hate it hate it hate it!"

"Stop acting like a child; it saddens me." Said Xaria with a shake of her head.

"We'll be starting any moment now." Said Eddie. "And Chris; seeing you in person is almost as unpleasant as seeing you at all."

"Shut up!" Snarled Chris. "I don't wanna be here! I wanna get a massage and watch dirty movies in my private trailer!"

"Pathetic." Muttered Hector.

"You're on in three, two, one." Said a cameraman intern.

Eddie and Sasha smiled for the camera while most of the peanut gallery waved (you can probably guess the three who didn't).

"I'm Eddie Lynmoire." Greeted Eddie.

"And I'm Sasha Tasset." Smiled Sasha.

"No relation!" Added Eddie.

"I thought you stopped that joke ages ago; it isn't that funny." Said Sasha with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah; you two don't look anything alike." Agreed Vinnie.

"Yeah; they're both ugly! Haha!" Laughed Chris though everyone ignored him.

"I used the joke because this is the final episode of Total Ousted Alphabet." Reasoned Eddie. "Yep; sorry to say it everyone, but Total Drama Letterz is on the eve of its end. But it's been a great show, and maybe some more surprises are in store."

"But you've been a great audience for all the episodes; but all good things must sadly come to an end. But if you focus on what you've left behind you'll never see what lies ahead." Said Sasha wisely.

"Very wise words." Agreed Lavender. "I've really enjoyed my time on the show; I've prove cheerleaders aren't always dumb, I've got a boyfriend and I kicked Kasimar in the nuts."

"Shut it or I'll hurt you!" Snapped Kasimar angrily.

"You also lost and didn't win so really you suck! Haha! Good one Chris." Laughed Chris pathetically.

"Do you hear that?" Said Lavender as she cupped her ear. "It's the sound of NO ONE CARING!"

"It was a hard final challenge but in the end against all the odds it was Spider who managed to pull off the win and was crowned the victor and competition winner of Total Drama Letterz."

The crowd cheered though quieted down when Eddie raised a hand.

"Now let's get this show on the road." Said Eddie. "Our first guest of the night is twelve years old, loves animals of all kinds besides gross bugs, managed to show that age doesn't matter and is the runner up of Total Drama Letterz … give it up for Eleanor!"

Eleanor walked out from backstage and the audience exploded into applause that lasted for a good amount of time. As Eleanor sat down in the interviewee chair Sasha shook her hand.

"Hi Eleanor; I am so sorry that you lost, I was rooting for you." Said Sasha sympathetically.

"Ah well; can't win them all right?" Shrugged Eleanor.

"What a good sport; that's really nice." Smiled Sasha.

"What a retard more like." Scoffed Chris. "She just lost a million #bleep# dollars! She should be crying like a little baby!"

"Like you did several times this season?" Asked Gary with a wry smirk.

"Call the plumbers because Chris let lose the waterworks." Joked Raven.

"Shut up! Man; I'll be glad to be able to get peace from you #bleep#'s next season." Whined Chris.

"That's what you think." Said Eddie with an almost warning tone. "So Eleanor; you battled hard in Total Drama Letterz and were only just beaten at the end of the final challenge. How do you feel about coming second out of twenty six?"

"I feel proud of myself for making it so far despite the fact I wasn't the strongest or even the smartest; I may not have won but I've had a wonderful time despite all the hardships." Smiled Eleanor.

"Yaaaar; she be a good sport." Said Barney in approval.

"But she's boring!" Whined Chris.

"What do you consider to be your best moment on the show Eleanor?" Asked Sasha.

"Hmm, that's a tough one. Maybe it was at the very beginning when I met everyone … there are some I'd rather not have met but I like most of the people here." Smiled Eleanor.

"Good moments are boring; what about worst moments?" Asked Chris.

"Shut up Chris!" Snapped Fifi. "You're a bully!"

"Speaking of bullies; you know Eleanor's worst moment don't you Kasimar." Smirked Chris sadistically.

"Yep; when I killed her little rat and made her cry; that was comedy gold. Yahahahaha!" Laughed Kasimar in the way of a sadistic sociopath.

Zita punched Kasimar in the face … hard. Some blood spurted out of his nose and he screamed in pain.

"My nose!" Wailed Kasimar.

"What Kasimar did was absolutely heinous by anybody's standards." Said Eleanor with a look of sadness and anger. "But I do not fear him anymore; if anything I sorta pity him. He has a lot of goodness to do if he wants to not go to the deepest layers of hell. Kasimar is like a splash of filth on the side of an outhouse in the devil's domain. He's got a lot of growing up to do."

"Well said Eleanor." Smiled Quana. "You really deserved to win … though I wanted Spider to win being that he's my boyfriend … but you did really well."

"Thanks; but I just couldn't make the jump at the end … two and a half thousand feet into a small pool is a bit out of my league." Admitted Eleanor.

"Wimp!" Jeered Chris.

"Laugh while you can Chris; you won't be able too for much longer." Smirked Eddie. "Anyway Eleanor; you were able to face your fear of injections not only in the fear challenge but also just before in the final challenge, would you say you've conquered it?"

"Well; I guess I feel better about injections now but I still don't like them." Frowned Eleanor before smiling. "But I got a cute badger band aid so it's all good."

"Badgers are awesome." Said Mable.

"And scary." Added Carlton.

"Badger, badger, badger, badger, mushrooms!" Yelled Uzuri.

"What was that?" Asked Vinnie in confusion.

"It's the weebl's Badger Badger." Explained Uzuri.

"That was stupid." Sneered Daisy.

"I thought it was kinda funny." Said Tabitha.

"Shut up you wretched witch." Snapped Daisy.

Tabitha went silent and hung her head sadly.

"If you could describe your time on Total Drama Letterz in three words then what would those three words be?" Asked Sasha.

"I'd say … completely life changing." Replied Eleanor. "I happily do it again if I could."

"But you can't so ha!" Sneered Chris.

"I can't help but notice you've become an item with Jimmy; care to comment?" Asked Eddie with a smile while completely ignoring Chris.

"Yeah, we're together." Blushed Eleanor shyly. "We may be young but we both liked each other a lot so there was no reason not to get together, right? Besides; he's cute, he's fun and he's a sweetheart!"

"Oh Eleanor; you're making me blush." Blushed Jimmy in embarrassment.

"Love makes me all giggly inside." Smiled Quana.

"It makes me sick." Grunted Kasimar.

"And such awful hair they have." Added Nakia.

"At least they have hair." Smirked Andy.

Nakia scowled and clenched her fists in anger but managed to remain silent.

"What was your favorite challenge? Knowing how much you like animals I guess it was the animal wrangling challenge." Guessed Sasha.

"Actually I didn't like that one too much." Said Eleanor.

"Me neither." Agreed Raven.

"My favorite challenge was probably the Harry potter challenge; acting out the scenes from the books was a lot of fun." Smiled Eleanor.

"I liked that challenge too; I bet I looked sexy in the spider costume, right Vinnie?" Asked Uzuri to her boyfriend.

"Can I plead the fifth?" Replied Vinnie with a silly grin.

"I didn't like that challenge so much." Said Gary while growling at Tabitha and giving Kasimar a death glare.

Tabitha mumbled something but didn't have the nerve or energy to say anything full volume.

"So; if there was a challenge you could have been in, one that wasn't in the show, what would it have been?" Asked Eddie.

"Maybe painting a big picture; I wouldn't want an animal challenge because Chris would likely make them suffer. Nature is our friend, not our scapegoat." Voiced Eleanor.

"I'll say." Agreed Irene. "Besides; Cacti tell the best jokes ever!"

"How exactly?" Asked Jimmy in confusion.

"Don't worry about it Jimmy; she's usually like this." Giggled Yessica.

"I think we have time for one last question before we move onto your fan mail; do you hate Chris?" Asked Eddie.

"Hey!" Whined Chris.

"I despise him! He's annoying, horrible and a complete meanie!" Frowned Eleanor. "He should be ashamed of himself."

"I have a feeling he will be soon." Said Eddie mysteriously.

"I doubt that; I can do anything I want because I'm Chris MacLean." Bragged Chris foully. "I say jump, you say how high."

"This coming from a man who no longer has any balls." Smirked Sasha as she walked backstage and hauled in a large sack of fan mail.

"Shut uuuuup!" Whined Chris while stomping his feet angrily.

"I have that many fans?" Asked Eleanor while looking at the bag with a big smile.

"People just like you." Smiled Sasha as she took a letter out of the sack and opened it up. "So; care to hear the first letter?"

"Sure!" Grinned Eleanor.

"Dear Eleanor; what are your top three favorite animals? From Vlad." Read Sasha.

"Hmm; that's a tough one since I love most animals to bits." Said Eleanor with her usual cute smile. "I'd say my third favorite is Giraffes, my second favorite is Red Panda's and my favorite is ferrets, though that should be no surprise really."

"I like Tigers." Said Quana.

"I like man eating sharks that rip people to shreds which makes me laugh." Cackled Kasimar.

"I like trains." Said Patch dumbly.

There was a moment of confused silence.

"Anyway; here's your second letter." Said Sasha as she opened a letter piece of fan mail. "Dear Eleanor; what's up with the turtle beanie? It's cute! From Marko."

"It's my favorite hat in my animal hat collection." Smiled Eleanor.

"You have a collection of animal hats?" Asked Zita in interest.

"Yep; I have a giraffe hat, a zebra hat, a prawn hat, a tiger hat, a penguin hat, a bat hat and even a shark hat. I chose the turtle hat because … it just felt like _the_ one to bring with me." Explained Eleanor.

"At least they cover up your ugly hair I suppose." Said Nakia dryly.

"Get bent." Snapped Quana at the bald brat.

"She's right though; Eleanor is as ugly as a deformed freak in a circus! Haha!" Laughed Chris nastily.

A large rock hit Chris; he yelped in pain and glared towards the peanut gallery. Chris didn't notice Jimmy shifting his eyes.

"I think we have time for another message." Said Sasha as she took a third letter from the sack. "Dear Eleanor; can I have your autograph? From Polly."

"Sure; if she's included the return address I'll be more than happy to oblige." Smiled Eleanor.

"Why doesn't she want _MY_ autograph?" Whined Chris.

"Because you're an asshole." Said Lavender flatly.

"Here here yaaar!" Agreed Barney.

"We wish you all the best Eleanor; you did just wonderful in this entire contest, but we still have one last guest to interview before this episode can come to a close." Said Sasha with a smile.

"Among other things." Said Eddie quietly. "So; can you sit with the peanut gallery for the remainder of the show?"

"Sure; the high rise sofa looks really comfy." Smiled Eleanor as she got up and then sat down in the high rise sofa next to Jimmy.

"So; only one guest left and the show will be over." Said Eddie. "It seems like a lifetime ago that we began.

"What exactly are you hiding?" Asked Sasha suspiciously.

"Just wait a little longer and you'll see … you won't be disappointed." Assured Eddie.

"There won't be much longer for you guy; meanwhile I'll be hosting season after season since I'm the main character and I'm awesome so ha!" Sneered Chris.

"Laugh while you can Maclean; it won't last much longer. Ga'fahahaha!" Laughed Eddie un-evilly which freaked Chris out. "Anyway; our final guest suffers from white blood cell deficiency, has contracted over one thousand diseases in his life, is in love with Quana, managed to stand up to Nakia, proved that you should never underestimate the underdog and won a million dollars earlier today … give it up for Spider!"

Spider nervously walked out on stage as the audience _**EXPLODED**_ into a huge amount of cheering, whistling and applauding that lasted a good half a minute. Spider sat in the interviewee chair while Quana blew him a kiss.

"Welcome to Total Ousted Alphabet Spider. Congratulations no winning Total Drama Letterz dude; I was rooting for you all the way." Said Eddie as he and Sasha shook Spider's hand in turn.

"Thanks; I really never even *cough* dreamed that I'd manage to win." Replied Spider.

"Neither did I." Grunted Chris. "How could a cancer patient win?"

"I *cough* don't suffer from cancer; that is *cough* _not_ something to joke about Chris." Said Spider disapprovingly.

"Surely you know good humor germ sponge." Said Chris dryly.

"I do; but I also know right *cough*t and I know wrong … and unlike you I know *cough* which is which."

"Nicely said Spider; you put Chris in his place!" Cheered Uzuri.

"So Spider; you managed to over come every obstacle that was put in your way and now you have a million dollars to show for it. How does it feel that you've won?" Asked Eddie.

"It's a great feeling; it *cough* feels like there is a big balloon swelling up inside me *cough* in a good way." Smiled Spider. "The first thing I'm *cough* going to do is book the required treatment so I'm not *cough* so sick anymore. Though I do have *cough* a secondary plan."

"What's that?" Asked Sasha.

"I have decided that I'll split the money two ways *cough* with Quana; after all, wouldn't any good boyfriend do that? I'm *cough* sure she can finance a singing career with half a million dollars."

"You'd really do that for me?" Asked Quana in a touched voice.

"In a heartbeat." Nodded Spider.

About 0.00001 seconds passed before Quana leapt up from her seat, jumped at Spider and gave him a big kiss which almost everyone 'awwwwwwed' at.

"Gross! A cripple and a slutty bimbo together, shameful." Said Nakia bitterly.

"They don't deserve the money! I do! I'm an A student! I have a degree in basket weaving!" Screamed Daisy in anger.

Sasha pressed a button on the side of her chair and a large amount of blue jelly fell down from the rafters above the stage and splattered on Daisy and Nakia.

"AAAAAARGH!" They both screamed as they ran off stage in humiliation.

"It's a shame it'll be the last time we can do that." Lamented Sasha.

"Indeed it is; their screams are delightful! Mwahahahahahaha!" Laughed Wallace evilly.

"You can drop the evil act Wallace; we know you're nicer than you let on." Smirked Yessica.

"I'm not! I'm evil, seriously!" Insisted Wallace.

Spider and Quana parted from their kiss and Quana giddily walked back to her seat with a spring in her step.

"I have a question; why do you want to be a doctor?" Asked Eddie. "Good career choice and all; but it's about the most ironic job you could possibly want to have."

"I know." Chuckled Spider. "But it's what my *cough* dad does and to be honest it's something I've always *cough* wanted to do."

"Lame!" Sneered Chris. "You're too stupid to do that! Haha!"

"Well you're *cough* fat." Replied Spider.

Chris's scowl deepened and he snarled angrily.

"Anyway; what was your favorite challenge?" Asked Sasha.

"Well … I'd say the Talent Show. I just *cough* enjoyed watching everyone's talents … and Quana's singing is as *cough* beautiful as my daffodil garden … oops." Blanched Spider.

"You have a flower garden?" Sneered Kasimar in amusement. "Fag! Fag!"

Kasimar received a hard punch to the skull from Uzuri who was sitting behind him.

"Shut up you meanie!" Growled Uzuri.

"Thanks Uzuri." Said Spider. "Anyway; let's pretend we didn't hear that and just *cough* move on."

"Sure; how about this question then, what did you think of Nakia's grudge on you?" Asked Eddie sympathetically.

"I never really understood why *cough* she hated me so much." Said Spider slightly sadly. "All because of my *cough* hair I think. It's an awful feeling to be *cough* hated. …And she tried to cripple me with a *cough* steel pipe! But at the same time it felt good when *cough* I finally summoned the courage to stand up to her."

"It doesn't matter if she hates you Spider … would you even want her as a friend anyway?" Asked Lavender.

"Good point." Agreed Spider.

"Now for one more question before we move onto the fan mail; care to comment on your relationship with Quana?" Asked Sasha teasingly.

"Well; she's *cough* my dream girl. I've been friends with her since *cough* day one and I started to fall for *cough* her on day six, the boat race I believe. She's a sweetheart, she got to know me before *cough* judging me and all in all I really love her." Said Spider truthfully. "I really think we've got something *cough* good going for us."

"I couldn't agree more." Smiled Quana. "I think all the couples have something good going on."

"Love makes the world go round." Said Raven sweetly while giving Gary a peck on the cheek while he put his arm around her.

"Time for the last fan mail section of the season." Said Eddie as he walked off stage and came back dragging a very large sack behind him. "Spider; you are clearly a popular contestant, a lot of people consider you to be the 'hero' of the season like Owen and Gwen last season. Care to hear some fan mail?"

"Sure; that sounds like *cough* fun." Smiled Spider.

Eddie took a letter out of the sack, opened it and began to read it.

"Dear Spider; why is your middle name Lesley? That's a girl's name! From Timmy." Read Eddie.

"I can't help what my *cough* parents name me can I?" Asked Spider in embarrassment. "I like my *cough* name just fine; but I agree my middle name is a little *sneeze* silly."

"I think it's cute." Smiled Quana.

"I'd say Raven's middle name is the cutest; her middle name is Milly." Smiled Gary at Raven.

Eddie opened a second letter and began to read it to Spider.

"Dear Spider; Marry me! From Geraldine!" Read Eddie with a look of amusement.

"Hands off; he's mine." Said Quana with a playful fist shake.

"I'm with Quana so I'm afraid I'll have *cough* to politely decline." Said Spider while looking like he wanted to evaporate on the spot.

"Next letter." Laughed Eddie as he opened a third envelope. "Dear Spider; you're awesome! You went above and beyond the call of duty throughout all of TDL so far; I'd actually go as far as to say you were the main protagonist. I'll be rooting for you! And let me tell you, good job hooking up with Quana, she's quite a looker! Rawr! From Septo."

"That's a really nice bit of *cough* fan mail; I never really thought of myself as that *cough* popular really." Replied Spider.

"I think the amount of fan mail you've received speaks for itself." Pointed out Andy.

"I think we have time for one more letter … and something tells me we're all gonna like this one." Said Eddie with an almost devious look on his face as he rummaged in the bag and pulled out a golden envelope.

"What's with the devious look yaaar?" Asked Barney.

"You'll see." Said Eddie as he opened the golden envelope and began to read. "Dear Spider; how much would you like to see Chris humiliated on live TV?"

"Very much so; he's a *cough* nasty bigot." Replied Spider.

"Well I can get away with anything because I'm Chris Maclean!" Sneered Chris.

"Care to tell that to our next guest?" Asked Eddie.

"What's going on Eddie?" Asked Sasha.

"Our next guest is a very powerful man, a very powerful man indeed; give a cheer for Mr. Matthew Gregson, the producer and chairman of Total Drama!" Announced Eddie with a smirk.

A middle aged man in a green business suit walked out from backstage to some applause; Chris visibly paled as Eddie crossed his arms in satisfaction.

"So Chris; what was it you were saying about being able to get away with everything?" Asked Eddie.

Chris just stuttered in panic as his boss looked at him coolly.

"At last we have reached our climax, feel the rising action around you and experience the satisfying conclusion about to unfold." Said Eddie as he sat back to relax. "I couldn't help but notice you have violated over fifty separate clauses in your contract Chris, such as endangering the contests, out of control bias and rigging challenges as well as discrimination and punching a contestant among lots more … logically the only thing to d was … call up your boss."

"But … but…" Stammered Chris in horror.

"Mr. Lynmoire here managed to get in contact with me a few days ago. Being that I was in a rural region of Romania on vacation I haven't seen the show but Eddie showed me some clips and filled me in." Said Mr. Gregson in a powerful yet calm voice. "I thought I could trust you to keep your sadistic urges in check and host a season with a little more power than last time … evidently I was wrong."

"But Mr. Gregson, I can explain!" Pleaded Chris.

"Silence!" Shouted Mr. Gregson. "You have crossed the line in this season Chris. You completely rigged the game is Mr. McSkeen's favor when he should have been disqualified several times, allowed cheating, made Miss. Xisonu cry and furthermore you punched Miss Silva earlier today. It is due to all of this that by the power vested in me I announce that…

…

…

…

…

…

You are _**fired**_!"

Chris stood frozen and completely dumbstruck.

"…Fired…" Whimpered Chris. "But … you can't!"

"I can and I will; Total Drama will be much better off without you." Said Mr. Gregson promptly. "I'm sure that we can find a new host pretty easily."

"But none of them will bring in the ratings like I do! I'm a big star!" Wailed Chris. "Besides; we're going to start taping the next season in a matter of days! You'll never find anyone that fast!"

"Silence!" Boomed Mr. Gregson. "I can see a clear candidate for the position of host within this room."

Everyone looked where Mr. Gregson was looking and saw he was looking at Spider, who so far had been sitting back and enjoying Chris's downfall.

"_What_?" Screamed Chris in horror. "Him? The sick guy? How could you possibly consider him as a replacement host?"

"Mr. Garnet is everything that you are not Chris." Spoke Mr. Gregson firmly. "He's popular with the audience, he's kind and fair and he bought in a lot of ratings I have been told."

Mr. Gregson walked over to Spider who was stunned by what had just been said.

"How about it Spider? Would you like to become the host for season three?" Asked Mr. Gregson while offering his hand for a shake.

Spider was silent as he thought for a few moments; he soon smiled and shook Mr. Gregson's hand.

"I accept *cough* your offer." Smiled Spider.

Chris looked like he had been hit by a sledgehammer.

"However; I'll only do it if Quana can be the hostess." Said Spider while smiling at his girlfriend.

"I see no problem with that." Nodded Mr. Gregson. "But; there is one more thing. If I hire you two I am legally obliged to hire the other twenty four campers as well … sadly that includes Miss. Baxter and Mr. McSkeen. Are you completely sure?"

"… I'll do it." Nodded Spider.

"Very well; the new season starts in a few days; it is also alphabetical themed and there will be twenty six new contestants; Mr. Lynmoire and Miss. Tasset are among those twenty six. Good day to you." Said Mr. Gregson as he left.

Everyone was silent with shock; Spider broke the silence.

"I'm the new *cough* host! Kickass!" Cheered Spider.

"Waaaaaaaaaah!" Sobbed Chris. "What about me! I demand to get what I deserve! Everything!"

"I believe that can be arranged." Said Eddie. "Please welcome the final guest of tonight and the season … Gertrude Maclean!"

Chris paled in horror as a VERY old lady hobbled on stage holding a cane.

"Christopher Frothingslosh Maclean!" Yelled Gertrude. "How dare you treat these whippersnappers like you have! You should be ashamed!"

"But Nansey." Whimpered Chris.

"No buts! You are coming straight home and are grounded for three years!" Roared Gertrude. "And then you are getting a world class spanking from my cane! I'm just glad the nice detective teen filled me in about what was happening."

Gertrude grabbed Chris by his ear and began dragging him off stage while he screamed and wailed like a little baby.

"**NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! THIS ISN'T FAIR! I'M CHRIS MACLEAN; I'M BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU! I'LL MAKE YOU SORRY, I'LL KILL YOUR FAMILIES! NOOOOOOOOOO!**" Wailed Chris as he was dragged away by his ancient one hundred and two year old grandmother.

Everyone was once again silent though Sasha soon broke it.

"Well; now I see what you were planning Eddie." Grinned Sasha as she laughed. "And so it was that the mighty tyrant fell and the teens took their rightful place in stardom."

"Indeed Sasha; but now it looks like the show is over." Said Eddie as he turned to the audience. "We hope you've enjoyed the show but now it's time to say goodbye. I and Sasha will be contestants next season … that I did NOT expect … and also Spider and Quana are host and hostess though I'm sure you'll be seeing your favorite from time to time. So goodbye from me, Eddie Lynmoire."

"And goodbye from me, Sasha Tasset." Waved Sasha.

"And see you next season!" Said both in usion.

"And cut; that's a wrap and the show is over." Said the intern cameraman.

The audience very quickly left until only Eddie, Sasha and the campers besides Daisy and Nakia were left.

"There's a party ready if any of you want to attend." Said Sasha.

"Alright! I'm gonna dance with a lamp shade on my head!" Announced Irene.

"All's well that ends well." Said Lavender with a smile as she kissed Barney. "Goodbye Chris and good riddance."

Spider got up off the interviewee chair and smiled.

"I'm actually the host of *cough* Total Drama … and I've won a million dollars; this is the *cough* best day of my life!" Said Spider in a truly happy voice.

"And it's about to get better." Grinned Quana naughtily as she pounced at Spider and picked him up bridal style. "I told you I'd let you see my badonkadonk's if you won, and I keep my promises! Let's go to my room!"

"Be gentle!" Gulped Spider though in reality he was excited as to what Quana had planned.

Quana ran out of the room giggling giddily with Spider in tow as the remaining contestants looked amongst each other.

"You know; I'm feeling kinda tired; I think I'm gonna go to bed." Said Raven with a fake yawn while giving Gary a brief suggestive glance.

"I'm suddenly tired as well." Said Gary immediately catching on.

Gary and Raven embraced as did all f the couples and everyone else 'aaaawd'.

"Oh I just _love_ a happy ending." Smiled Jimmy while Eleanor hugged him.

"Me too." Agreed Eleanor.

"Bah! Not me; I like _unhappy_ endings with lots of death and violence!" Grunted Kasimar.

A bolt fell down from the rafters above Kasimar and landed on his head.

"What the?" Asked Kasimar to himself as he looked up.

BAM!

A stage light fell down and smashed onto Kasimar's face. Kasimar staggered and swayed on the spot before falling off the stage unconscious and into a dumpster the Audience had put left over snacks in.

"Err … are you happy now Kasimar?" Asked Jimmy uncertainly.

Barney began to laugh, soon so did Lavender, Eleanor and Jimmy and pretty soon everyone was laughing at the bully's misfortune. Even Tabitha managed to laugh happily.

It was a truly wonderful night; Chris was fired, the horrible people were defeated and everyone was happy. It was a summer that none of them would _ever_ forget.

* * *

**The (Happy!) End**

* * *

And so it is that at long last Total Drama Letterz has come to an end. At over sixty chapters and six hundred thousand words it is a bulky behemoth of a story; the longest fanfic in the fandom , or at least until Total Drama Battlegrounds overtakes it at some point. But until then I wear the crown as the creator of the longest TDI fanfic!

So how about that? Chris is fired and humiliated (and his middle name is Frothingslosh) and Spider and Quana are the new host and hostess. Every contestant will appear in the sequel and for some their plot is FAR from over…

But before it's the end I have some last minute shout outs to give…

* * *

**Credits**

* * *

**Frank15:** You are an incredibly talented writer and I love your work (Go Todd!) even if we have very differing opinions on certain characters. You were my inspiration to write this story and my first friend in the fandom. It doesn't really seem that long ago that we first met when you commented on the drawing of Uzuri in November last year. Thank you for the constructive reviews you've left; they mean a lot. And thank you for the drawings of some of my characters; they are awesome!

**Bad-Asp:** You are great fun to talk to and have left a lot of reviews which I really appreciate. I'm looking forward to your own alphabet story in the future. But most of all; thank you for making the elimination chart and confessional chart for Total Drama Letterz; they were always fun to look at.

**Haters Go To Heaven: **Even though your alphabet story is near the beginning I am honored that I helped inspire it to be written. Your reviews are always good and in my opinion a good balance between constructive and praise. Good luck on Total Drama Alphabetized; I'm rooting for Umi!

**Everyone else: **Whether you've left reviews; added me or the story to favorites and/or alerts I am very thankful. Even if you've only read the story and just that I still am grateful to you.

* * *

For almost a year now I have written this story … and you have all read it … and for that I am eternally grateful.


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